Tom Hanks (Extended) | President Barack Obama

Summary

The Late Show Pod Show with Stephen Colbert

Episode: Tom Hanks (Extended) | President Barack Obama
Date: May 14, 2026

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Episode Overview

This lively and insightful episode of The Late Show Pod Show features host Stephen Colbert celebrating his birthday with two of America’s most respected figures: former President Barack Obama and legendary actor Tom Hanks. The show weaves together Colbert’s hallmark political satire, a revealing and thoughtful interview with Obama, and an extended, playful conversation with Hanks. Both guests share personal stories, reflections on American history, and more than a few laughs.

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Key Discussion Points and Insights

1. Political Monologue & Satire (02:20–13:15)

• Colbert opens with sharp wit on his birthday and moves swiftly to headline news, lampooning Donald Trump’s trip to China accompanied by prominent CEOs and controversial Hollywood director Brett Ratner.
• He mocks Trump’s reported goal of asking President Xi to open up China to American “magic”—riffing on their abilities to make taxes disappear (“Illusion!”).
• Extended riff on the ongoing, cost-escalating war in Iran under Trump, including stinging commentary on inflated military spending, minimal results, and economic fallout (“Operation Sledgehammer, bro. Okay, I am back on board. Take another trillion.” —Colbert, 07:42).
• Satirical “Hormuz News You Can Use” update about the ineffective outcomes and renaming the war to dodge Congressional mandates, poking fun at bureaucratic technicalities.
• Segue into recent American economic woes, disapproval ratings, and Colbert’s signature impressions of Biden and Obama, leading to an energetic “let’s dance” moment (10:00–11:03).
• On emerging bizarre wellness fads, he mocks “ball-maxing”—a tongue-in-cheek critique of male self-improvement extremes (“If you got time to fill your balls, you got time to fill the dishwasher, okay?” —Colbert, 11:04).

2. Colbert Questionnaire with Barack Obama (14:43–21:24)

Colbert welcomes President Barack Obama for a refreshingly personal interview segment centering on the “Colbert Questionnaire”—a set of questions designed to reveal a guest’s true self.

Memorable Excerpts and Insights

• Best Sandwich
  • Obama: “A cheeseburger’s the best sandwich.” [15:46]
  • With cheddar, lettuce, tomato, and mustard—drag it through the garden.
• First Concert
  • Obama: “Elton John, Goodbye Yellow Brick Road Tour… second was Stevie Wonder, Inner Visions Tour.” [16:02]
• Scariest Animal
  • Obama (scientific): “Mosquitoes are the scariest thing…they bring a lot of bad diseases.” [16:36]
• Autograph Sought
  • Obama recalls getting Dr. J’s autograph at a Hawaii basketball exhibition. [17:04]
  • Leads to a playful banter about Colbert beating Dr. J at waste paper basketball.
• What Happens When We Die?
  • Obama: “If we’ve lived a good life, we live on in the memories of the people who loved us.” [18:09]
• Favorite Action Movie
  • Obama: “Daniel Craig James Bond series was terrific… I would go with Casino Royale.” [18:24]
• Favorite Smell
  • Obama: “My wife.” [19:08]
• Earliest Memory
  • Obama: “Looking at tadpoles with my mom in a pond behind our house in Hawaii.” [19:58]
• One Song for Life
  • Obama: “Marvin Gaye ‘What’s Going On,’ maybe Nina Simone ‘Feeling Good’.” [20:39]
• Describe the Rest of Your Life in Five Words
  • Obama: “Michelle, Malia and Sasha… joy, useful.” [21:04]
• Mutual warmth and humor define the exchange, concluding with Obama plugging the upcoming Obama Presidential Center opening in Chicago.

3. In-depth with Tom Hanks (22:47–45:58)

Colbert sits down with Tom Hanks amid birthday celebrations, audience banter, and a treasure trove of anecdotes.

Notable Topics

• On the Enduring Fascination with World War II (WWII docu-series) [25:40–30:26]
  • Hanks: “What a personal test…Would I have had the fortitude, the wherewithal, or the morals in order to say, well, if I don’t join up and do whatever I can…?”
  • Shares a moving story of his father’s WWII experience, meeting a fellow veteran decades later (“They talked in this language that I’d never seen…”).
  • On America’s actions post-war: “Mercy was granted upon the surrender of the vanquished…We conquered no territory…The only thing we require of you is to go on and guarantee your people the freedoms of speech, religion, assembly, and the press.” [29:01]
  • Colbert references Eric Severide: “You will never know what happened because the war happened inside your husband.” [30:31]
• Saving Private Ryan and Steven Spielberg [31:42–33:24]
  • Hanks relives shooting Omaha Beach scenes, noting Spielberg’s directions about avoiding air morors for safety, but the warning flags were removed, leading to an actual minor injury.
  • “If you watch the movie, there’s a moment where something very hot lands on my neck… I have this little burn scar right here for the rest of the film.” [32:03]
• Veterans’ Causes – Tom’s Coffee [33:24–34:35]
  • Hanks: “We have done the same thing [as Paul Newman] for the veterans communities.” Introduces his Ovaltine-infused coffee blend; proceeds benefit veterans’ charities.
  • “A legal addictive stimulus.” —Hanks, poking fun at caffeine. [34:12]
• Tom’s Coffee Order & Riffing on Milk Alternatives [35:27–36:08]
  • Detailed comedic riff on coffee snobbery—prefers pour-over, whole milk, “no such thing as almond milk… just because it’s white doesn’t mean it’s milk.”
• Why He’d Make a Great Park Ranger (per Nora Ephron) [36:13–37:13]
  • On fascination with minutiae and a childhood desire to “tell stories around campfires.”
• Hanks’ Top Movie Memories (37:44–39:49)
  • Prefers moments during filming:
    • Splash—on learning to scuba dive: “This is like being on vacation. I get to. I have to learn how to scuba dive. Well, this is the greatest friggin’ job…”
    • The Da Vinci Code—running through the Louvre, changing shoes alone with the Mona Lisa.
    • Sleepless in Seattle (with Rob Reiner): Shares hilarious story of driving home from Disneyland, passing a bus showing their movie, and trying to get the passengers’ attention by honking (“Honk, honk, honk… that’s us!” [42:03])
• Birthday Gifts for Colbert [42:44–45:51]
  • Running gag about stealing CBS office supplies. Hanks presents Colbert with dot matrix paper and a vintage Underwood Ace typewriter as birthday gifts, riffing wonderfully about “never losing your data” and “becoming Ace Underwood, Cub Reporter.”
    • “As long as you have an idea in your head, you can just type and type and type…just like Jack Kerouac wrote On the Road.” —Hanks [44:42–45:51]

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• Colbert (on Trump’s China trip):
  "It is so satisfying to realize that no matter how rich or powerful you may be, there’s a chance you might get stuck on a plane with Elon Musk." [03:26]
• Colbert (on government waste):
  "Operation Sledgehammer, bro. Okay, I am back on board. Take another trillion." [07:42]
• Obama (favorite sandwich):
  “A cheeseburger’s the best sandwich.” [15:46]
• Obama (on legacy):
  “If we’ve lived a good life, I think we live on in the memories of the people who loved us.” [18:09]
• Colbert (on ball-maxing fad):
  “Fellas, you got time to fill your balls, you got time to fill the dishwasher, okay?” [11:04]
• Tom Hanks (on WWII):
  “Mercy was granted upon the surrender of the vanquished. We conquered no territory.” [29:01]
• Colbert (on typewriters):
  "What better name than Ace Underwood, Cub Reporter." [44:42]

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Timestamps for Key Segments

| Timestamp | Segment Description | |-----------|----------------------------------------------------------| | 02:20 | Colbert’s birthday monologue, Trump’s China trip | | 07:40 | Iran war cost and “Operation Sledgehammer” segment | | 10:00 | Biden/Obama impressions; dancing bit | | 11:03 | Manosphere wellness & “ball-maxing” riff | | 14:43 | Barack Obama interview (“Colbert Questionnaire”) | | 21:24 | Obama Presidential Center plug | | 22:47 | Tom Hanks joins; World War II with Tom Hanks discussion | | 30:26 | WWII: Mercy, U.S. post-war policy | | 31:42 | “Saving Private Ryan”/Spielberg anecdotes | | 33:24 | Tom’s veteran coffee charity initiative | | 35:27 | Hanks’ coffee order, milk riff | | 36:34 | “Greatest Park Ranger” story | | 37:44 | Hanks’ top movie moments & Disneyland story | | 42:44 | Hanks’ birthday gifts to Colbert (paper & typewriter) | | 44:42 | Hanks explains significance of typewriter |

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Summary Tone and Atmosphere

The episode brims with the signature humor and warmth that defines both Colbert and his guests. Obama’s segment blends wisdom, humility, and candor, while Tom Hanks delights with richly evocative stories, effortless comedy, and palpable generosity. Colbert’s irreverence is central—anchoring the show in humor even as it touches on history, policy, and nostalgia.

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This summary encapsulates the breadth and spirit of the episode, from pointed satire to heartfelt recollections, making it an enjoyable listen (or read) for fans and newcomers alike.

Transcript

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[Stephen Colbert]

Today.

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[Stephen Colbert]

Welcome, welcome one and all in here out there to the Late Show. I am your host, Stephen Colbert, ladies and gentlemen. That' that is a thank you for our energy. Thank you for that. I take that as a president. It is my birthday today. Yep. Thanks. Sit down. Thank you. Very kind. You too. There you go.

[Tom Hanks]

Thank you.

[Stephen Colbert]

Yes, it is my birthday. Please Have a seat, everybody. It is my birthday today. I turned. I can play 45. I can also drive stick, and I'm available in June. Today, also, Donald Trump is in China. Here he is arriving. Wow. Melania was right. Shen Yun is fantastic. Trump's not making this trip alone. He brought Tim Cook, Elon Musk, and a dozen other CEOs. It is so satisfying to realize that no matter how rich or powerful you may be, there's a chance you might get stuck on a plane with Elon Musk. This is fun. This is fun. Like, does anybody want my sperm? So why are all the big money holes attending? Well, according to Trump, I will be asking President Xi to open up China so that these brilliant people can work their magic. Oh, yes, these people can work magic. They have already made their taxes disappear. Illusion. Trump also brought the director of Melania and of the Rush Hour franchise, Brett Ratner. Now, you may be asking, what the hell is a disgraced Hollywood director doing on a vital diplomatic visit? Not sure, but this is true. Donald Trump did demand a sequel to his favorite movie franchise. So Ratner's scouting film locations for Rush Hour four. No, no. A president of the United States should not be involved in movie stuff. Didn't we learn our lesson when JFK said this?

[Tom Hanks]

Ask not what your country can do for you.

[Stephen Colbert]

Ask who's pumped for the Music Man,

[Tom Hanks]

Shirley Jones and Buddy hackett?

[Stephen Colbert]

More like 76 thumbs up. So bringing Ratner to China seems weird. Though I will admit, he did bring his own very skilled translator.

[Tom Hanks]

Do you understand the words that are coming out of my mouth?

[Stephen Colbert]

Of course, Fred. It's a class. Got to give it up for Tucker. Got to give it up for. One of the big issues hanging over Trump's fabulous billionaire boys trip is the war he started over in Iran. Ships are stuck, negotiations are stalled, and the cost keeps going up. A couple of weeks ago, the administration told Congress the price tag of the war was $25 billion. Then the Pentagon upped that number to $29 billion. But now one Pentagon budget expert says the conflict will ultimately cost taxpayers at least $1 trillion. Okay, that's an enormous number. To put that in perspective, if you stacked $1 trillion, the height of the stack would measure over 67,000 miles high, which is almost as high as. Whoever thought that comparison would be useful. So what is America getting for our hot trilly? Way less than we were promised. Because we just learned that Trump has been drastically overstating US Military success in Iran. Wait a minute. Are you saying our commander in chief was Being imprecise when he gave this detailed report on combat operations. Fire pum. Fire poom. What part of that don't you get? Bing, bing, bong bong. Not only is the regime over there still in place, not only do they still have their nuclear material, but US intelligence now says Iran has retained roughly 70% of its pre war missile stockpile, 90% of its underground missile storage and launch facilities, and access to 30 of the 33 missile sites along the Strait of Hormuz. Which means I have to update my long suffering segment. Hormuz News. You can use. Stockpiles barely reduced. I am the walrus. Cuckoo coochoos. To be honest, we are running out of rhymes. Lately. The administration has been insisting that their bombing campaign named Operation Epic Fury is over. But just in case they are hungry for seconds, reportedly the Pentagon is considering renaming the Iran war Operation Sledgehammer.

[Tom Hanks]

Oh, yeah.

[Stephen Colbert]

Operation Sledgehammer, bro. Okay, I am back on board. Take another trillion. Take another trillion. Okay. Yeah, there you go. All right. This, this, this is my kid's college fund. I told my wife it wouldn't touch it, but Sledgehammer. I didn't know. I didn't know we were going. I didn'. I didn't know we were going. Peter Gabriel on their asses. Come on, let's shock the monkey. So. But don't shoot the floor. Now I look messy. Okay, why did they rename it get ready? Because this is super stupid. You see, the 1973 War Powers Resolution requires Congress to authorize military action within 60 days. And because we have now passed that 60 day deadline, the administration believes replacing the name could allow Trump to argue that it restarts the clock. Oh, yeah, totally new war. Now it's Operation Sledgehammer. And the next one will be called Operation. And just like that, it won't have Samantha. So the clock starts again. The war has also. Trump's war in Iran has also pushed America's economy into what financial experts call the poop shoot. Voters have noticed that right now 70% of Americans disapprove of Trump's handling of the economy. And more than two thirds of Americans say the country feels out of control. Oh, come on. Things are completely under control. Donald Trump may seem unstable, but I'm sure he has a plan. What is your plan, Mr. President? Polls. Trump's poll numbers are not Good. Just ask CNN's Harry Antin. These are the ugliest numbers I have ever seen on inflation. And it's not just one poll, Johnny Berman. It's many polls. Just take A look here. President's net approval on inflation. The five worst polls ever for any president. The five worst polls ever. Five worst polls ever. Joe Biden's not in there. Joe Biden. That's right, Jack. I'm not in there. I'm in here. That's right. How's it going? Hey, how's it going, Barack? What's going on? Okay, I'm. I'm not in there, cuz. I'm in here asking. Remember how much better it was when I was in charge, cuz? Cause I'll be honest, folks, I do not. Last Biden impression ever. Let's dance, everybody. Come on, you know. Come on. Yeah, let's dance. You know you make me wanna. A little bit louder now. Watch me whip Watch me nene Watch me, watch me nene Twisting the night away of course, longtime viewers know that.

[Tom Hanks]

Did you even lift, bro?

[Stephen Colbert]

Oh, gosh. Sorry, folks. That sound means it's time we talk about news from the troubled world of men. In the past few years, there's been a slew of manosphere wellness fads like lookmaxing, which is when dudes try to maximize their physical appearance, sometimes in drastic ways. Well, it's taken a bit of a dark turn, a turn down south, because now there's a new trend called ball maxing, an actual procedure where men actually inject saline to maximize their scrotum size. Nope, nope. No more hobbies for men. Fellas, fellas, you got time to fill your balls. You got time to fill the dishwasher, okay? All right. For those who don't know, for instance, me, until this morning, ball maxing is all about going for the biggest balls possible. And you know what? Who doesn't want that? Not only does it make walking a challenge, but also, by comparison, it makes your penis seem very small. Kind of like dropping a baby carrot onto a beanbag chair. One testicular maxinista is so committed to the lifestyle that he claims his scrotum is 14.5 inches or bigger than a mango. Mango. I don't think that mangoing anywhere. For anyone. Thank you. For anyone. I got a Thomas. I got the problem. There you go. For anyone considering maximizing their balls, please know there are hazards. For example, after one session, this same mango man got his scrotum stuck in a toilet. Even more impressive, it happened while he was in the shower. We got a great show for you tonight. Tom Hanks is here. But when we come back, President Barack Obama takes the Colbert.

[Tom Hanks]

What's mare?

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[Stephen Colbert]

Folks, listen, I hope you caught my interview with President Barack Obama last week. Oh, lovely. Hanging out. All of newsworthy revelations it contained, perhaps the biggest was that he said I could call him Barack. I am still not comfortable with that. But the 44th president was in fact, so comfortable with me that he was brave enough to bare his soul. Sir, you and I have had a chance to talk many times. It's been an honor every time. I've enjoyed it. You've been very frank and forthcoming. But the thing is, even with the kind of in depth interviews that we've had, sometimes you don't get to know someone fully by doing that. So we at the Late show have come up with something called the Colbert Questionnaire. It's a series of 15 questions. Let's do it ergonomically, designed to penetrate straight to the soul of someone. But I want to warn you, if you answer these questions honestly, you will be fully known. Are you.

[Barack Obama]

I've got nothing to hide. Let's go.

[Stephen Colbert]

Okay, Barack Obama, what is the best sandwich?

[Barack Obama]

A cheeseburger's the best sandwich.

[Tom Hanks]

Cheeseburger.

[Stephen Colbert]

Sandwich. Okay, what cheese are we talking here?

[Barack Obama]

Cheddar.

[Stephen Colbert]

Cheddar. Okay.

[Barack Obama]

Yeah.

[Stephen Colbert]

Lettuce, tomato.

[Tom Hanks]

What do we.

[Barack Obama]

Lettuce, tomato, drag it through the garden. Mustard.

[Stephen Colbert]

Okay. What was the first concert you attended?

[Barack Obama]

It was 1973. Elton John, goodbye Yellow Brick Road Tour. And the second was Stevie Wonder, Inner Visions Tour. They came through Hawaii, I think, on their way to Asia to make money. But at the Blaisdell Center.

[Stephen Colbert]

Powerful answers.

[Barack Obama]

It was great.

[Stephen Colbert]

Unbelievable. What is the scariest animal?

[Barack Obama]

This is a scientific nerd question, but mosquitoes are the scariest thing.

[Stephen Colbert]

Yeah.

[Barack Obama]

Yeah. Because they bring a lot of bad diseases. There you go.

[Stephen Colbert]

Apples or oranges?

[Barack Obama]

Apples.

[Stephen Colbert]

Okay.

[Barack Obama]

Yeah.

[Stephen Colbert]

Can't put peanut butter on an orange.

[Barack Obama]

You can't. Oranges. There's only one thing you can do that's eat it.

[Stephen Colbert]

Have you ever asked someone for their autograph?

[Barack Obama]

In 1977, I think Dr. J came to Hawaii for an All Star game, an exhibit game, and I asked Doc for an autograph.

[Stephen Colbert]

That's great. You. And I played waste paper basketball once back in the day. And it doesn't matter who won, but the first person I ever did that with, first guest I ever did that with, was with Dr. Jim.

[Barack Obama]

Yeah. Who won?

[Stephen Colbert]

I won. And he was not happy.

[Barack Obama]

I know.

[Stephen Colbert]

He accused me, too.

[Barack Obama]

Yeah, you probably did. I mean, you practice.

[Stephen Colbert]

I never.

[Barack Obama]

You crumpled the balls up real quick.

[Stephen Colbert]

You gotta let it go, man. You gotta let it go. You've done a lot of great things. Don't let this be the thing that you like, that in the middle of the night, you go, what if I had won? What if I had achieved that?

[Barack Obama]

I'm getting kind of hot. Okay, let's move on.

[Stephen Colbert]

What. What do you think happens when we die?

[Barack Obama]

I think that. I don't know.

[Tom Hanks]

But.

[Barack Obama]

What? I accept that if we've lived a good life, I think we live on in the memories of the people who loved us.

[Stephen Colbert]

Do you have a favorite action movie?

[Barack Obama]

I thought the Daniel Craig James Bond series was terrific.

[Stephen Colbert]

Yeah.

[Barack Obama]

Yeah.

[Stephen Colbert]

Casino Royale. Casino Royale and Skyfall.

[Barack Obama]

Skyfall.

[Stephen Colbert]

Those are the two biggest.

[Barack Obama]

And I would go with Casino Royale.

[Stephen Colbert]

Come on. When it first runs through the wall, instead of going. Fantastic. Blunt instrument. Window or aisle?

[Barack Obama]

Window.

[Stephen Colbert]

So you don't need to worry about getting up the bathroom.

[Barack Obama]

My bladder's pretty solid.

[Stephen Colbert]

Okay. Okay. Favorite smell.

[Barack Obama]

Now, I. I have to say, I. I wasn't entirely briefed on this, but I was told that Michelle said I smelled pretty good. So, like, I.

[Tom Hanks]

Wait, wait.

[Stephen Colbert]

So your favorite smell is you?

[Barack Obama]

No, I was gonna say it's obviously gotta be my wife.

[Tom Hanks]

Oh.

[Stephen Colbert]

Oh, wait. She says you smell pretty good.

[Barack Obama]

Yeah, she said oh.

[Stephen Colbert]

Oh, I see. Oh, when I asked her. Exactly. So you got reciprocal.

[Barack Obama]

I do.

[Stephen Colbert]

Okay.

[Barack Obama]

Absolutely. Because I'm not. And it has the benefit of being true.

[Stephen Colbert]

Least favorite smell.

[Barack Obama]

You know, I'm not overly sensitive to smells, so. I mean, they're the obvious ones. I don't think I'm super original when it comes to least favorite smells. Do you have a favorite smell that you just.

[Stephen Colbert]

I don't answer the Culberg question yesterday. I'm sorry.

[Barack Obama]

Okay.

[Stephen Colbert]

These are the rules. I just.

[Barack Obama]

Which makes sense.

[Stephen Colbert]

Okay. Yeah. Earliest memory.

[Barack Obama]

Earliest memory is. Looking at tadpoles with my mom in a pond behind our house in Hawaii.

[Stephen Colbert]

Yeah, That's a good one. Do you have any sense of how old you are?

[Barack Obama]

Three. Yeah.

[Stephen Colbert]

Cats or dogs?

[Barack Obama]

Dogs.

[Stephen Colbert]

You only get one song to listen to for the rest of your life. You don't have to listen to it continually, but when you go to listen to music, this is the song you get to hear. What would it be?

[Barack Obama]

Marvin Gaye? What's going On? Maybe Nina Simone. Feeling good.

[Stephen Colbert]

Between those two, what number am I thinking of?

[Barack Obama]

Seven.

[Tom Hanks]

No,

[Stephen Colbert]

sir. Please describe the rest of your life in five words.

[Tom Hanks]

Joy,

[Barack Obama]

Michelle, Malia and Sasha all count. Yes.

[Stephen Colbert]

There you go.

[Barack Obama]

That's three. Useful.

[Stephen Colbert]

Congratulations, Mr. President. You are known.

[Barack Obama]

I hope so. Thank you.

[Stephen Colbert]

Thanks again to President Obama. The Obama Presidential center opens in Chicago on June 19th. We'll be right back with Tom Hanks.

[Commercial Narrator]

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[Tom Hanks]

Hey, uncle number one, why aren't we counting anymore? Long ago, Serta invented the perfect sleeper mattress.

[Commercial Narrator]

Oh, no.

[Tom Hanks]

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[Stephen Colbert]

Nope. Serta. We make the world's best mattress this Memorial Day.

[Commercial Narrator]

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[Stephen Colbert]

My guest tonight, ladies and germs, I'm happy to say my guest tonight has a new docu series on the History Channel called World War II with Tom Hanks.

[Tom Hanks]

Poles were outgunned by the Germans who had three to one tanks and five to one airplanes. So there's no question that the Germans were a superior force. Despite those odds, the Poles are determined to defend their country. Everyone had to help. And soldiers conscripted civilians on the street, putting them to work. I saw one man who was stopped six times on his way home with a loaf of bread. The Poles remain resilient.

[Stephen Colbert]

Ladies and gentlemen, Hanks. Hey now.

[Tom Hanks]

Thank you. Thank you.

[Stephen Colbert]

Tom. Good to see you. I cannot help but notice that you brought a prop.

[Tom Hanks]

Dude. You're moving on. And there is so much stuff to steal from the offices right now. They're never gonna miss it. And one of the things I like to do, I hit that stationary closet, right? Yes. And it's like, okay, steno pad's got plenty cheap ass ballpoint pens. Don't need them. But stationary with a CBS logo on it. Dude,

[Stephen Colbert]

thank you.

[Tom Hanks]

That is letterhead stationary. I mean, I'm gonna talk about that. That Reba paper probably cost your benevolent overlords like 35 cents or something like that.

[Stephen Colbert]

I think they would say it cost them $40 million. Thank you. Thank you for sending it down to

[Tom Hanks]

the economics of the talk show business. No, that's mine. I'm taking it home. Well, no, all right. You can do.

[Stephen Colbert]

All right. I'm stealing mostly toiletries. Well, then, yeah, my pockets are full of Advil at this point, by the way.

[Tom Hanks]

I want. If I could, I would just pull an Oprah right now. Say you get a ream of paper, you get a ream of paper. You get a ream of paper, you get a ream of paper.

[Stephen Colbert]

Let's make them earn it, though. Let's make them earn it. If they're a good audience.

[Tom Hanks]

We'll see how you do. Because quite Frankly, I have 2 hours and 25 minutes of material that we're gonna try to pack it into 15

[Stephen Colbert]

minutes and 30 seconds.

[Tom Hanks]

I can't spend enough time with Stephen Colbert.

[Stephen Colbert]

I got nowhere to go. Yeah, they're gonna have to put a shaped charge around me to get me out of this interview tonight.

[Tom Hanks]

You know, I'm gonna get modeling if we start talking, because I don't know how the entertainment industrial complex is gonna survive without you.

[Stephen Colbert]

Well, it'll roll along. Much like the Republic and the great Columbia.

[Tom Hanks]

We shall go on.

[Stephen Colbert]

We shall go on. Listen. Speaking. The country is about to celebrate a big birthday.

[Tom Hanks]

The big 250-big 250.

[Stephen Colbert]

Yeah, 260 years to celebrate, you've got a new docu series on the History Channel. As I said right there, World War II with Tom Hanks. Now, I'm fascinated with World War II. I had family over there. What is it? Why do you think you. But also the general public. Why do you think people are still so fascinated with World War II?

[Tom Hanks]

Okay, first of all, I'm of two minds of this. One is the day I always go back. If I think I'm 19 years old, I'm 22 years old, or maybe I'm 15, and I can lie about my age and get into the Marine Corps.

[Stephen Colbert]

Sure.

[Tom Hanks]

The world was at this place where it was like, hey, if someone doesn't take up the mantle, who will? Suddenly, there was a moment where half the world was going to be robbed of the basic freedoms that made us Americans. The freedom of speech, religion, assembly and the press. 1/2 the world that was taken out by essentially one guy in Europe. One guy just sold this narrative. And the next thing you know, you have, you know, crosses at the cemeteries of enormity. So I can't get past that. What a personal test of. Would I have had the fortitude, the wherewithal, or, quite frankly, the morals in order to say, well, if I don't. If I don't join up and do whatever I can, even if I'm just going to be, you know, typing on a, you know, report somewhere or in.

[Barack Obama]

Or is.

[Tom Hanks]

Remember Andy Rooney, you know, great cbs, by the way, who served? You know, he covered the war in airplanes and whatnot. Yeah. He said, of course, you know, some. Oh, come on. Not everybody was a hero. Some people served in that 28th Shoe Repair Battalion. I said, nonetheless. But I say, and those shoes saved the world. You know, they brought. So that is. That is one spectrum. But I'll tell you this one thing. I was shopping with my Dad. I was 11. We were at a Safeway in Oakland, California. We're just picking up stuff for home. Yeah, there you go. And my dad said, we were about to get in line in order to buy our stuff. And my dad looked at a guy and he said, brian Cunningham. And Brian Cunningham looked at my dad and said, bud Hanks. And I said, and they talked in this language that I'd never seen. And they had this look in their eyes of. They were in there. That was 1966. Right. So they were now in their 40s. And in the car ride home, I said, dad, who was that? He said, that was Brian Cunningham. I haven't seen him since we were in the South Pacific together in 1944. And I just thought, these were grown men. All of the adults in our lives had stories that were told in three very specific acts. Something happened to them before the war, something happened to them after the war. But when they would say, well, you know, that was during the war. A time of stasis in which they had no idea how long World War II was going to last. There were jokes. Golden Gate in 48, you know, gonna be fined in 49, in civilian shoes in 52. That's how long they thought it was gonna last. Long. And as late as 1947, right here in New York City, out in the shipping lanes that were becoming into the harbor long before you could even see the Statue of Liberty. As late as 1947, shiploads of Americans were coming back because they were in the war for the duration, plus six months, right? There was a huge sign that said, welcome home. Job well done in 1947. So I can't. I have just. I always turn that again. And despite the fact that America still was a superly flawed country, that was an example of us becoming a more perfect union. And the best thing I can say about it is mercy. Where was mercy in World War II? Where was it? It didn't exist. No, it did exist. Mercy was granted upon the surrender of the vanquished. We conquered no territory. We didn't even ask reparations from them. We said to the vanquished in Germany and in Japan, in the Far East. All right, that was then. This is now. The only thing that we require of you is to go on and guarantee your people the freedoms of speech, religion, assembly, and the press. And they did. As opposed to the rest of the happy. So there you go. All right, that's it. And I'm going to type that up what I just said on some stations.

[Stephen Colbert]

Did you ever hear Eric Severide's famous piece about the war and where the war happened?

[Tom Hanks]

I did not.

[Stephen Colbert]

But, oh, Severide, who is evidently a prince of a fella, a Severite who was in, I think, like, Burma in that area, reporting on that. He said it's harrowing, this message he brings back to the mothers and the fathers and the girlfriends and the wives and everything. He said, you will not. You will never know what happened because the war happened inside of your husband.

[Barack Obama]

Mm.

[Tom Hanks]

Look at what we just saw in that goofy little clip, by the way. Hilarious. Good introduction. You are just somebody who lives in Poland and you know, this is gonna happen. And what did you do on the way home from work today, actually, I helped dig ditches in order maybe to keep the tanks out of. Out of Warsaw. So it comes down to it all is down to a vision of personal aid. What are we willing to do in order to protect the morals that our country is based on, not everybody else?

[Stephen Colbert]

Well, all right. Thank you.

[Tom Hanks]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, boy. Yeah, boy.

[Stephen Colbert]

You, as everybody knows, starred in one of the biggest and most praised World War II movies of all time, Saving Private Ryan. That's true.

[Tom Hanks]

Yeah. Thank you.

[Stephen Colbert]

Steven Spielberg's gonna be here.

[Tom Hanks]

Oh, yeah.

[Stephen Colbert]

Let's talk about disclosure day. Here are the two of you right there. I think this is shooting Omaha Beach.

[Tom Hanks]

Yeah, we were on Omaha.

[Stephen Colbert]

Yeah, we were giving you a note of some kind.

[Tom Hanks]

Okay, here's. I believe this is what Stephen was saying. Listen, you got to run right through there. You got to get up there. But whatever. You see those red flags, those little red flags? Those are the air mortars. And so they're going to be going off. So don't step on where the red flags are because those air mortars are going to explode. You could get hurt. I mean, you could break your leg or something could get in your eye. So whatever you do, avoid those red flags because those are the air mortar special effects, explosive special effects that are part of the shot. So avoid those red flags is what Stephen is saying. And just before. And we're rolling and what happened, the special dicks crew came and removed all the red flags. So we are going. And if you watch the movie, there's a moment where something very hot lands on my neck. And for the rest of the movie, I have this little burn scar right here in my neck for the rest of the film. Yeah, well, because they removed the red flags, you see,

[Stephen Colbert]

I'll ask him about it. Literally, I will play this clip for him when he's here on tv.

[Tom Hanks]

Don't run here. Don't. Don't run here. Shoot you three feet in the sky. Don't run by right here. Ready and action. That's what it is.

[Stephen Colbert]

So speaking as an advocate, as an advocate for the vets, you've got a coffee here that benefits veterans charity. Tell me about the coffee.

[Tom Hanks]

Well, based on Newman's Own. I worked with Paul Newman at the time he was doing it. He has these great products that he loves and all the money goes to his Hole in the Wall Gangs for Sick Kids. We have done the same thing for the veterans communities.

[Stephen Colbert]

Great.

[Tom Hanks]

Now here's the deal.

[Stephen Colbert]

Quality stuff. Let's try it out.

[Tom Hanks]

Well, okay. I believe that's grounds. It's not instant coffee.

[Stephen Colbert]

Just a little.

[Tom Hanks]

Yeah, but a little pinch between your

[Stephen Colbert]

cheek and gum gives you full coffee flavor without lighting up. Tom.

[Tom Hanks]

Tastes good, but I have a. It might be disappointing for the band, guys, these are legal addictive stimulants.

[Stephen Colbert]

Oh, man. No fun. No.

[Tom Hanks]

Because I know you're all holding, but honestly, nothing you cannot. Anyway, you deal with, like, chemists and stuff in order to. And I have a special blend called Tom's Morning Joe, I think is what it's called. And it's got a little Ovaltine in it. It's got a little wisp of Ovaltine, because all kids love Ovaltine.

[Stephen Colbert]

They've got Ovaltine. They come with a secret Dakota ring.

[Tom Hanks]

Well, it's almost like that. They said, would you. And they said. The folks found it. The coffee business, which is fascinating, how coffee's made. They said, really? You want a little Ovaltine in there? I said, yeah, yeah, yeah. Can we get it? They said, well, we could get malt. Yeah, but you have this in your coffee. I said, yes, I do. And they made it for me. And once again, guys, a legal addictive stimulus. All right. Is that all right?

[Stephen Colbert]

Tom Hanks having Ovaltine in his coffee is almost a caricature of Tom Hanks at this point. Hey, let's do something right now, okay? Let's make it easier for whatever PA has to be waiting for you nervously with your coffee on the first day on set, whatever next movie you're doing right now. What should this PA have ready for you? What's Tom Hanks coffee order?

[Tom Hanks]

Well, I'm gonna say a pour over coffee. The grounds is like filter.

[Stephen Colbert]

Like filter.

[Tom Hanks]

Well, yeah, like the paper thing. You pour it in. It takes a while for to dribble down. And then half whole milk. I'm sorry, there's no such thing as almond milk. There is. I understand that. I am a guy that I could. It's like, just because it's white doesn't mean it's milk.

[Stephen Colbert]

Cause I know people that will.

[Tom Hanks]

What? I'm gonna put paint in my coffee. It's white, you know, so anyway, so I put whole milk and.

[Barack Obama]

And

[Tom Hanks]

little teaspoonette of Ovaltine. If I don't have my morning Joe.

[Stephen Colbert]

Speaking of. But by the way.

[Tom Hanks]

And I'm boom for the rest of the day.

[Stephen Colbert]

One cup.

[Tom Hanks]

That's right.

[Stephen Colbert]

One cup. That's it. Two cups. Okay. Speaking of great Tom Hanks film, Sleeplessness in Seattle was your first collaboration with Nora Ephron. Yes, it was. She said And I love this quote. Seems true. I want to know why you think so. You would have made the greatest park ranger in the history of national parks. Why do you think she described Tom Hanks that way?

[Tom Hanks]

The fascination with minutiae. And I gotta say, when I was 13 years old, we were on a family vacation, my mom and I don't know, some guy she was married to. He wasn't a great guy, but we all went out, it was fine, and there was a guy. We heard this thing. Hey, campers, it's campfire time. And we all walked to a big bowl with a campfire with our flashlights and a guy with a Smokey Bear hat and a badge and a uniform. The whole bit held us in thrall for an hour, talking about the history of the national park within. And so I'm 13 years old, and I'm just thinking, I want that guy's job. And I sort of have it. So it all worked out okay.

[Progressive Insurance Narrator]

Sure.

[Tom Hanks]

Yeah.

[Stephen Colbert]

I've asked some musicians this. I've like Bruce Springsteen top. You know, what are Bruce Springsteen's top five Bruce Springsteen songs? They're like, yeah, what?

[Tom Hanks]

When can. Is it? Did he already do that? Cause I'd like to know when we

[Stephen Colbert]

said it all on the show. You should check out the show sometimes. Pretty good. Now, you missed an episode. Are you saying you missed an episode of this show?

[Tom Hanks]

If it's not encapsulated by the New York Times the next morning, I'm not really paying much attention to it. That's fair. We all do that.

[Stephen Colbert]

You know, I'll ask you, Tom Hanks, Does Tom Hanks have a list of Tom Hanks top five movies?

[Tom Hanks]

Okay, no, because, like. But I.

[Stephen Colbert]

You can't name five good movies. You should.

[Tom Hanks]

No, I can name.

[Stephen Colbert]

I can name like three right away.

[Tom Hanks]

You named three.

[Stephen Colbert]

Okay, yeah, pretty sure.

[Tom Hanks]

But this actually comes down to moments that happen in the making. In the making of the movie. One was my very first movie. Ron Howard is called Splash, and it played murder. Thank you, thank you.

[Barack Obama]

Yep.

[Tom Hanks]

Peaked in the 90s. Thank you very much. He said, okay, you got the job that you're going to have to learn how to scuba dive as what? This is like being on vacation. I get to. I have to learn how to scuba dive. Well, this is the greatest frigging job on the planet Earth. Now that translated to me being dressed just like I am under 40ft of water with iron weights in my pants, being towed into place by a safety diver. But, you know, kind of like. But that's a Pretty fun joke.

[Stephen Colbert]

Okay.

[Tom Hanks]

Number two is we were making the Da Vinci Code in Paris. Thank you. Yeah, thank you. And I had to Audrey tattoo, and I had to run through the Louvre museum, and I had to change into special shoes. And so I did. So I said, oh, Tom, there's an apple box, and your shoes are in this other room. And so I go in there and I sit on an apple box. I'm surrounded by masterpieces. I'm putting on these. It's like, well, there's the Mona Lisa. How about that? Hey, girl, what are you up to? What's that odd little smile? And I'm there all by myself. Now, what gig allows that for crying like that? Wow. And okay, and then I will tell you this other amazing moment that I swear, this is absolutely, 100% Rob Reiner. God bless his eternal memory. We worked with Nora Ephron and Sleepless in Seattle. There is a scene. Do you have the picture of it?

[Stephen Colbert]

We do, actually. I was gonna ask you about this. This is the famous tiramisuzi.

[Tom Hanks]

This is a tiramisuzi. Rob Reiner and me, we were shooting in Seattle. Now, that scene, okay, we got to know each other really well on this. And our kids were all about the same age. So one day we go to. We say, yeah, let's go to Disneyland. Let's kids out of the house. And so we all drove in one car. Rob, Michelle, our kids, me and Rita. And we drive to Disneyland. And understand, when you go to Disneyland, spend one hour for every year of age for your kids. So if your kids are seven, you stay there for seven hours. If your kids are 12, you stay there for 12 hours. Anyway, so we had a great day. It was great. And then they were driving home, and alas, we left in the middle of the most hideous traffic that Los Angeles can allow. You could take the 110 to the 404. You are stuck in traffic. So we're on the 405, right? Literally. And we happened to be next to a bus, a commuter bus. And their job was to get people from the Valley to LAX or from the LAX to the Valley. We were right next to this bus for the longest time, and Rob was riding shotgun, and I was driving. And we happened to notice that in this bus, because people are stuck on it for so long, they have TV monitors that play movies. I swear, this is absolutely, 100% true. And as we're going along, hey, look, they're playing movies. And then Rob says, I think that's Sleepless in Seattle. And so I'm trying to, like, you know, get up as much, as much as we can. And we're leaning over like this and sure, we could see up in the window of the. Our movie is playing on a TV screen right there. And not only that, Rob says, I think. I think the tiramisu scene is coming up. And I said, oh, my God, you're right, because we did the thing first. And up on the screen in this bus, this scene is playing, right? And Rob says, oh, my God, that's so. Oh, yeah, that's a chemise. So I start honking the horn and there's a guy that is watching the movie like this.

[Stephen Colbert]

Honk, honk, honk, honk, honk, honk, honk,

[Tom Hanks]

honk, honk, honk, honk. And Rob and I go, felt, that's us.

[Barack Obama]

We're.

[Tom Hanks]

We're. We're right there.

[Barack Obama]

We're hunk.

[Tom Hanks]

And this guy. That is absolutely as surreal a moment as you could possibly have, but that is absolutely true of what happened on that.

[Stephen Colbert]

You know what? You should be a park ranger. You tell a great story, Mr. Hanks. Well, now, they wrapped us a long time ago.

[Tom Hanks]

I'm sorry about that.

[Stephen Colbert]

I wish some of this could have made it to air. But before we go, I have been warned that you have something in a box back there. I have no idea what this is about. I know it's my birthday. It is. I hope it is your birthday. Is it? Is it more paper?

[Tom Hanks]

Was it?

[Stephen Colbert]

Well, did I just. I didn't mean to.

[Tom Hanks]

You are close. It is. But yet, what makes this box of paper special for your birthday? Open it and find out. All right. Drums. For your birthday, Stephen Colbert. I have for you dot matrix paper.

[Stephen Colbert]

Is this for an Okie Dotta? Okie Dotta. Thank you so much.

[Tom Hanks]

Very kind. I understand that this is great paper that is always connected. All you have to do is remove this and then.

[Stephen Colbert]

Yes, the paper comes up inside.

[Tom Hanks]

Now, you might wonder, what the heck are you gonna do with such a thing? This is all connected. It's like three miles of paper.

[Stephen Colbert]

It is. It is. There's nothing hid under this. This is, in fact. He is a man of his word.

[Tom Hanks]

Yeah, exactly.

[Stephen Colbert]

Right now, this is paper.

[Tom Hanks]

It's not enough to have great paper.

[Stephen Colbert]

Yes.

[Tom Hanks]

You need a tool with which to use that paper. And you're going to be doing some serious resume writing.

[Stephen Colbert]

Yes, I am.

[Tom Hanks]

And what have you.

[Stephen Colbert]

Yes.

[Tom Hanks]

And so, Stephen Colbert, for your birthday, I would like to present, via the Hank etz. Happy birthday, Stephen Colbert. Thank you, girls.

[Stephen Colbert]

Shall I go ahead.

[Tom Hanks]

Now, Stephen, this is not just a typewriter. It's a mid century portable typewriter made by the Underwood Corporation. It is not just an Underwood. It is the Underwood Ace model A, C, E. Which means should you ever want to take on the mantle of a cub reporter, what better name than Ace Underwood? Cub Reporter. So you can get typing. And as long as you have an ID in your head, you can just type and type and type. Let's say, for example, you got an idea that you've got to get down and it's 47 pages long. You know what would help you with that? Just like Jack Kerouac wrote On the Road with perhaps some addictive stimulants could get you through that. And so, between that typewriter, this paper, and Hank's coffee, you are on your way.

[Barack Obama]

There you go.

[Tom Hanks]

What is it?

[Stephen Colbert]

Thank you, Tom.

[Tom Hanks]

You will never lose your data.

[Stephen Colbert]

Tom Hanks, everybody. Thank you for listening to the Late Show POD show with Stephen Colbert. Just one more thing. If you want to see more of me, come to The Late Show YouTube channel for more clips and exclusives.

[Commercial Narrator]

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[Stephen Colbert]

Stop shopping.

[Commercial Narrator]

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[Tom Hanks]

Oh, these just the most perfect fitting job my stylist sent me.

[Commercial Narrator]

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[Tom Hanks]

foot in a mall and still looks amazing.

[Commercial Narrator]

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