0016. Na'im Ali and Xia Anderson

Summary

Podcast Summary: Zac Amico's Morning Zoo – Episode 0016: Na'im Ali and Zia Anderson

Release Date: June 8, 2025

Hosts and Guests:

• Zach Amico (Host)
• Na'im Ali (Guest from the upcoming podcast True Dad)
• Zia Anderson (Co-host and comedian)

---

1. Show Start and Initial Banter (01:02 - 02:35)

The episode kicks off with typical Morning Zoo chaos as the hosts humorously address a late start.

• Zach Amico [01:47]: “Hello, It's a Wednesday here on the Gas Digital Network. It's your other boy, the international superstar Zak Amico.”

• Zia Anderson [02:16]: “Welcome to the horror of doing a show with someone who's perpetually late. It will age you. It will drive you crazy.”

The playful jabs set the tone for the episode, emphasizing the unhinged and humorous nature of the show.

2. Discussion on Digital Platforms and Guest Management (02:35 - 07:35)

The hosts delve into the challenges of managing show guests, particularly through digital platforms like Craigslist.

• Zach Amico [10:00]: “Honestly, you know what's so funny? When we were doing Chip, we wanted to do a hemorrhoid competition... I put it up on Craigslist thinking maybe it'll be up for a little while.”

• Zia Anderson [11:18]: “I had to go read the ad, read the ad, read the ad.”

This segment highlights their creative yet sometimes unconventional methods for sourcing guest content.

3. Stereotypes and Their Origins (12:35 - 20:35)

A substantial portion of the episode is dedicated to unpacking common stereotypes, tracing their roots, and sharing personal anecdotes.

• Na'im Ali [17:35]: “Most stereotypes are true... The watermelon stereotype comes from black people being watermelon farmers because it was the easiest thing to grow.”

• Zach Amico [17:46]: “What about the fried chicken one? Where'd that come from?”

• Zia Anderson [18:15]: “It's because white people were richer in some cultures and had access to higher cuts of meat, so they didn't need to...”

The hosts discuss how historical contexts like slavery influenced stereotypes such as black people being associated with watermelons and fried chicken, and white people with mayonnaise.

4. Plugs for True Dad Podcast and Upcoming Shows (07:35 - 12:35 & 19:42 - 20:27)

Na'im Ali introduces his upcoming podcast, True Dad, emphasizing its focus on true crime.

• Na'im Ali [20:15]: “It's a great show. If you like True Crime, check us out... There are scary people outside everywhere.”

Zach and Zia enthusiastically promote the podcast, sharing release dates and encouraging listeners to support their projects.

5. Managing Panic Attacks and Mental Health (20:35 - 28:00)

The conversation shifts to personal experiences with panic attacks, coping mechanisms, and mental health awareness.

• Zach Amico [40:03]: “I've had panic attacks so many times since I was 16... I can talk myself out of it.”

• Zia Anderson [40:31]: “When I have panic attacks, the first thing that really helps me is count your teeth.”

• Na'im Ali [43:03]: “My baby mama has panic attacks when she drives...”

The hosts share strategies like counting teeth and memorizing objects to manage anxiety, fostering a supportive dialogue on mental health.

6. Pet Ownership Stories and Experiences (25:00 - 35:00)

Sharing humorous and sometimes challenging tales of pet ownership, particularly dogs.

• Zach Amico [35:07]: “I've seen people get wasted and piss on hotel walls. It happens.”

• Na'im Ali [35:05]: “I bought a golden doodle for my daughter... six months later, the dog was way bigger than expected.”

These anecdotes illustrate the unpredictability and demands of owning pets, reinforcing their preference for low-maintenance animals like cats.

7. Fast Food Adventures and Restaurant Experiences (35:00 - 60:00)

The hosts reminisce about fast food experiences, highlighting both positive and negative encounters.

• Zia Anderson [57:03]: “I was on the road and I had two different fast food breakfasts that blew my mind.”

• Zach Amico [55:28]: “They sent us like two out of the eight things that we ordered...”

Stories range from exceptional meal discoveries to frustrating service mishaps, adding a relatable and entertaining layer to the discussion.

8. Celebrity Tipping Stories (60:00 - 73:00)

A lighthearted segment where the hosts discuss how various celebrities tip based on accounts from service staff.

• Shannon [69:54]: “T. Pain once tipped $2,000 on an $800 bill.”

• Zach Amico [71:10]: “He gave a thousand dollars to each staff member on the set of The Different Man.”

Positive examples include generous tippers like T. Pain, Bruce Willis, and Zendaya, while less favorable mentions like the Dixie Chicks illustrate the disparity in tipping behaviors.

9. Closing Remarks and Final Plugs (73:00 - End)

The episode wraps up with final anecdotes and promotional content.

• Zia Anderson [75:21]: “We're gonna call it there. Thank you so much for tuning in... Catch you this Friday on GasDigital.com.”

• Na'im Ali [76:06]: “The fun's begun. No sleeping in. Noon is morning time to him.”

The hosts encourage listeners to check out Na'im Ali's True Dad podcast and tease upcoming content, maintaining engagement until the end.

---

Notable Quotes:

• Zach Amico [01:47]: “It's your other boy, the international superstar Zak Amico.”

• Na'im Ali [17:35]: “Most stereotypes are true...”

• Zia Anderson [40:31]: “Take your tongue and count your teeth...”

---

Conclusion:

Episode 0016 of Zac Amico's Morning Zoo delivers a blend of humor, personal stories, and insightful discussions on stereotypes and mental health. With guests like Na'im Ali and the dynamic presence of Zia Anderson, the show offers an engaging and chaotic start to the listeners' mornings. The episode also effectively plugs upcoming projects, ensuring fans stay tuned for more entertaining content.

Transcript

[Zach Amico]

Hi, Zoe Saldana.

[Naim Ali]

Welcome to T Mobile.

[Zach Amico]

Here's your new iPhone 16 Pro on us. Thanks. And here's my old phone to trade in. You don't need to trade in. When you switch to T Mobile, we'll give you a new iPhone 16 Pro. Plus we'll help you pay off your old phone. Up to 800 bucks and you still.

[Zia Anderson]

Get to keep it.

[Zach Amico]

There's always a trade in. Not right now.

[Zia Anderson]

At T Mobile.

[Zach Amico]

I feel like I have to give you something in return for karma.

[Zia Anderson]

That's okay.

[Zach Amico]

I don't really have much in my purse. Oh, let's see. Hand sanitizer. It's lavender.

[Naim Ali]

I'm good. Seriously.

[Zach Amico]

Let me check this pocket.

[Naim Ali]

Oh, mints.

[Zach Amico]

Really, I'm fine. Oh, I have raisins.

[Naim Ali]

I'm a mom.

[Zach Amico]

Wait, wait one sec.

[Naim Ali]

I've got cupcakes in the car.

[Zia Anderson]

It's our best iPhone offer ever. Switch to T Mobile.

[Naim Ali]

Get a new iPhone 16 Pro with.

[Zia Anderson]

Apple intelligence on us, no trade in needed. We'll even pay off your Phone up.

[Naim Ali]

To 800 bucks with 24 monthly bill credits. New line, 100 plus a month on experience beyond Finance Agreement 999.99 and qualifying ported for well qualified.

[Shannon]

Plus tax and $10 connection charge.

[Naim Ali]

Payout via virtual prepaid card. Allow 15 days credits end and balance due if you pay off early or cancel c mobile.com.

[Zia Anderson]

Fill her up.

[Naim Ali]

You're listening to the Gas Digital Network. Wake up, it's time to go. Zack Amo's got a show. Animals are here to play jokes and guests to start your day. Tell the sandman no more sleep Eat some eggs and cook some beef Laughter's waiting, don't be shy Stretch your legs and touch the sky Grab a coffee, join the crew It's a Miko morning too.

[Zia Anderson]

Hello, It's a Wednesday here on the Gas Digital Network. It's your other boy, the international superstar Zak Amico. Sorry we're starting late. My sincere apologies. It has nothing to do with our other guests. Donald. Jesus Christ.

[Zach Amico]

Damn it, Donald.

[Zia Anderson]

Jesus. Motherfucker. Okay, well, across the table from me from the new show premiering here on Gas Digital on the 6th. True dad, half the show is here, half the show is arriving. But across the table from me is Z. Anderson. How are you doing, baby?

[Zach Amico]

I'm good. I'm good. How are you?

[Zia Anderson]

I'm great. Welcome to the horror of doing a show with someone who's perpetually late. It will age you. It will drive you crazy.

[Zach Amico]

Even from experience.

[Zia Anderson]

You will sit on a couch for hours of your life, staring into the abyss, questioning who you are and if anyone respects you and if anyone thinks you're worth their time at all. And. Wow, that lady's got a big pecker in the chat.

[Zach Amico]

Oh, damn.

[Zia Anderson]

Very, very nice. If you want to. Hey, bring that up, Jorge. I want to show. Is that real? God damn.

[Zach Amico]

I. I've spent some time on this site called Red Gifts. I don't know if you've ever heard of it.

[Zia Anderson]

I have not.

[Zach Amico]

There are a lot of ladies with peckers. Oh, wow. That's a big one.

[Zia Anderson]

Yeah, that's a. Holy crap. Wow. I don't know if that. If that. Maybe it's the perspective. Maybe her hips are closer.

[Zach Amico]

That looks like a tall lady.

[Zia Anderson]

I don't know. It might. It looks like Photoshop. But you know what? Look at those hands.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah, no, I believe it.

[Zia Anderson]

Hey, if it is, it is. And God bless her, I. Fuck it. I'd let that fall on the top of my nose.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah, I was gonna say, where's Jim when you need him? He will love this.

[Zia Anderson]

You know what? He's a happy man. I don't want to. Hopefully he will be joining us soon.

[Zach Amico]

Really?

[Zia Anderson]

We're hoping. We're discussing. But yes, I will say, you know what? The older I get, the more I gotta say I like a little in between.

[Zach Amico]

Okay, A little.

[Zia Anderson]

Hey, hey, you know, I mean, you.

[Zach Amico]

This isn't surprising. You've done a podcast called Bye guys.

[Zia Anderson]

Yes.

[Zach Amico]

So, like, the. The fact that you're like, a woman, I feel like that's the best of both worlds, right? Like, that's.

[Zia Anderson]

Nah, pussy's the best.

[Zach Amico]

Okay.

[Zia Anderson]

Come on.

[Zach Amico]

I don't know. Like, if you get a trans woman with a dick, they've got tits, they've got lady parts, but then they have a really nice penis. Like maybe a.

[Zia Anderson]

Her hermaphrodite.

[Zach Amico]

Okay, I still don't know what that is.

[Zia Anderson]

A hermaphrodite is someone with both sex.

[Zach Amico]

Organs, so they legitimately have a vagina under the penis. How does that work? Where does the dick go under? On top? On the side? Is it like a half Half?

[Zia Anderson]

So aren't. Don't they all start as vagina? Don't we all start as women?

[Zach Amico]

I think so.

[Zia Anderson]

And then you grow a dick and then your balls become drop.

[Zach Amico]

They, like, drop.

[Zia Anderson]

Your ovaries drop and become balls.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah, it was something like that.

[Zia Anderson]

This is science with. This is basic science with Zach and Zia, the two dumbest people in the world. How do balls work? So I. Yeah, I think it's Basically where the clit would be, I think is a dick.

[Zach Amico]

Oh, I've heard of ladies that have like very large. Okay. Hello. So that is a little bit of a. That looks like a lipstick penis.

[Zia Anderson]

Yeah. Sorry we started late, guys, but now you get what? You get what?

[Zach Amico]

That's legitimately both. That's both. Oh my God.

[Zia Anderson]

Yeah.

[Zach Amico]

So I think too much. That's.

[Zia Anderson]

I, I've. What's the biggest clip you've seen?

[Zach Amico]

I don't know. Maybe my own.

[Zia Anderson]

What are we looking? Give me, give me a. Give me a. Give me a. Okay.

[Zach Amico]

Like that. It's nice.

[Zia Anderson]

Little bean. Jelly bean.

[Shannon]

But it's.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah, it's like a little jelly bean.

[Zia Anderson]

Shannon. Clit.

[Shannon]

Wait, how am I describing the size?

[Zia Anderson]

Give me, give me something similar. Give me an idea. Thimble jellybean.

[Shannon]

Maybe like a jelly bean on the side.

[Zach Amico]

Okay. Like a sideways jelly bean.

[Zia Anderson]

Okay, that's fair.

[Shannon]

Just as far as the height.

[Zia Anderson]

Oh, okay.

[Shannon]

Yeah. Not the width.

[Zia Anderson]

All right. Wow. Okay. I. The. I was with a gal that had quite the clitoral honor and she would talk about it a lot.

[Zach Amico]

Did she like it when you sucked on it?

[Zia Anderson]

Yes, she did.

[Zach Amico]

She was quite the fan. I believe that.

[Zia Anderson]

And she, she would frequently use the word swollen.

[Shannon]

Oh.

[Zia Anderson]

To describe her hard clit.

[Zach Amico]

It gets hard. It got hard.

[Zia Anderson]

I would go as far to say engorged.

[Zach Amico]

Did she? Okay, I just found out about this. There's so many things to learn on the Internet.

[Zia Anderson]

Go ahead.

[Zach Amico]

A clip pump.

[Naim Ali]

Uh huh.

[Zia Anderson]

I did not know about that. But please look it up.

[Zach Amico]

So apparently you add. It's just the thing that you put on your clit and then you kind of like a penis pump, I think.

[Zia Anderson]

Like a Swedish penis.

[Zach Amico]

Like a Swedish penis enlarger.

[Zia Anderson]

That's from the movie Austin Powers, by the way, starring a man named Mike Myers. If you didn't know who that is, inside joke on the show.

[Zach Amico]

I would be really sad if no one knew that.

[Zia Anderson]

Wouldn't it be sad?

[Zach Amico]

I would be so sad if you.

[Zia Anderson]

Met someone that didn't know who Mike Myers was. You'd be like, you dumb cunt. Right, Right.

[Zach Amico]

Shannon, we cannot be friends.

[Zia Anderson]

Absolutely.

[Shannon]

Agreed.

[Zach Amico]

Did Shannon never heard. Was it Shannon that never heard of him?

[Shannon]

How dare you, Zia.

[Zach Amico]

Shannon.

[Zia Anderson]

No, it was not.

[Zach Amico]

It was not Shannon.

[Zia Anderson]

It was not Shannon whatsoever. In fact, I would call it an anti Shannon.

[Zach Amico]

Oh no.

[Zia Anderson]

I do want to see a clip pump. Now. Apparently they also sounds like a Jersey dance. We go clip pumping tonight. That's what lesbians do in Jersey.

[Zach Amico]

They just go like this.

[Zia Anderson]

Yeah, they Clip. Pump. At the club. Okay.

[Zach Amico]

So, yeah, apparently, it makes your orgasm really awesome.

[Zia Anderson]

Okay. I mean, curious, Shannon, how much are they?

[Shannon]

Let's see. Oh, that's.

[Zach Amico]

What is. What is that contraption?

[Zia Anderson]

That's an air purifier. Oh, Jesus Christ. That's like.

[Shannon]

I don't know what it is.

[Zia Anderson]

That's like a game of Mousetrap.

[Zach Amico]

What the. That looks like a meat grinder.

[Zia Anderson]

That should have the fact. You know, like the factory music, the. Holy.

[Zach Amico]

I don't think I want that anywhere near my. What the fuck?

[Shannon]

I think this is something else. I put the word by accident.

[Zia Anderson]

Yeah. That's a centrifuge. That's a centrifuge.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah. That's not.

[Zia Anderson]

That's a giant piece of machinery in that. It's not gonna go good.

[Zach Amico]

It's not gonna be a pussy for long.

[Zia Anderson]

Maybe it's a go down. Those are shoes. That's the way you get pussy. That's a toilet. That's who you're getting it for.

[Shannon]

Actually, I saw one. I saw one on Amazon. Here.

[Zia Anderson]

Yeah, go on Amazon.

[Shannon]

There you go. 20 bucks.

[Zach Amico]

20 bucks.

[Zia Anderson]

That's not bad, Shannon. Get it.

[Zach Amico]

Does that also have nipple pumps?

[Zia Anderson]

I guess you could probably use it for that, too, right?

[Shannon]

Yeah, two. Two different attachments.

[Zia Anderson]

Oh, get it right now. Get it right now. We'll pump my. Jorge, Will you pump my nipples on the show? I would want nothing less. Thank you. Oh, we're definitely. Yeah. Yeah, we're getting it. Yeah, we're gonna. Shannon, you don't have to be the person. We will find someone to test it.

[Zach Amico]

I was going to say you could probably talk to Lainey and she would get someone in here that would be willing to try that out.

[Zia Anderson]

I could also just go out on the street and waive $20.

[Zach Amico]

That's true. But see, what the thing with that, though, is, what are you going to get?

[Zia Anderson]

The thing with Lany is, what are you going to get? Have you seen the Goblin? She walks drunkenly down the stairs to get in here.

[Zach Amico]

It's been a little while, no? Is it not good anymore? What happens?

[Zia Anderson]

I don't know, man. It's just like. I have Craigslist, too. Lainey, what the fuck's. The fuck you're ja. I shouldn't see the ad. You should have a roster. It shouldn't just be. Put it up on fucking.

[Zach Amico]

They fucked up. They got rid of back pages. I feel like that's where the quality was.

[Zia Anderson]

Well, back page had adult services.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah.

[Zia Anderson]

And now everything's on Craigslist. Under like personals or whatever. No, but we're also like adult gigs or something.

[Zach Amico]

Oh, adult gigs. What a way to.

[Zia Anderson]

Or yeah, it's like they got rid of whatever categories you could use to fudge gather up horse for a podcast.

[Zach Amico]

Honestly, you know what's so funny? When we were doing Chip, at one point, we were trying to come up with like funny bits and we wanted to do a hemorrhoid competition where Chip would, you know, judge the best hemorrhoid. And so I was trying to think of how would we get women to come on who had hemorrhoids. Like, that's kind of a hard sell. And so I put it up on Craigslist thinking maybe it'll be up for a little while. I think it was like 20 minutes later I got an email saying that they took my post down and I was like, well, where the am I supposed to find someone with hemorrhoids? And that didn't seem super sexual to me either. So I don't that.

[Zia Anderson]

That might be more of a fan base based question.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah, but how many fan women are like, yeah, you can stop there. Good point.

[Zia Anderson]

I one time was I had a cast a movie and there was a part in the movie for a kid. But I wanted to be very open that it was an R rated movie. So I put in the ad. Hey, this is an R rated film. Your kid won't be on set for any of the R rated parts. But you know, there are sex scenes in the movie. So I just want you to be aware of that before any responsible. Before responding. Dude, I got a call.

[Naim Ali]

Hey, guys.

[Zia Anderson]

Hey, buddy, look who's joining us. Hey. Hey, pal. How are you?

[Naim Ali]

Beautiful, beautiful.

[Zach Amico]

Hey, Z, you made it.

[Zia Anderson]

Hey, you're looking fucking. You're looking fucking shredded, buddy.

[Naim Ali]

Oh, thanks.

[Zia Anderson]

You look good.

[Naim Ali]

You look like, you know, you look.

[Zia Anderson]

Like scary Tiger Woods.

[Naim Ali]

Oh, yes, that's what I'm going for.

[Zia Anderson]

Yeah, there you go.

[Naim Ali]

I wouldn't be able to bag white women, but still look a little dangerous. You see what I'm saying?

[Zia Anderson]

Yeah, well, I mean, that goes hand in hand.

[Naim Ali]

Yeah, true, right?

[Zia Anderson]

Let me say. Tells you. I was telling her I got a call from NY casting saying, hi, we see here you posted an ad for child sex scenes and we need to report you to the police.

[Zach Amico]

Oh my God.

[Zia Anderson]

And I had to go read the ad, read the ad, read the ad.

[Zach Amico]

Who reported that and was like, what the fuck? Because you know, someone did.

[Zia Anderson]

It's like, oh, great, now I'm on this list twice. All right, well, naim Ali has joined us from the upcoming podcast True Dat.

[Naim Ali]

Yes.

[Zia Anderson]

Which is coming out on the 6th here on gas Digital. I'm so glad you're here, buddy. I apologize. We started, we had to get the show moving.

[Naim Ali]

No, I get.

[Zia Anderson]

Thank you so much.

[Naim Ali]

What do you apologize for? I'm late as shit, you know? Yo, all right, this is the thing, right?

[Zia Anderson]

I mean, you had time to get a red drink.

[Naim Ali]

I did. I had time to get a red drink, you mean. But this is the thing.

[Zia Anderson]

Yo, he's a court low.

[Naim Ali]

Y' all know I'm late. Y' all know I'm a late guy. Y' all gotta start giving me the wrong time. My whole family gives me an hour ahead. They say, yo, you gotta be here at 11. I don't really gotta be there till 12.

[Shannon]

Hey, Naim, why don't you give yourself the wrong time when you book something?

[Naim Ali]

Shannon, how much? I'm not that responsible and you know that.

[Zia Anderson]

The real mental frustration in Shannon's voice.

[Naim Ali]

Yes, that's real frustration. Shannon almost socked me when I came in. She almost punched me in the face when I came in.

[Zia Anderson]

Between years of Lewis then figs. Shannon is just fucking done. Shannon is a beaten down old dog.

[Zach Amico]

Shannon, share your podcast idea. I think it's genius.

[Shannon]

It's podcast called why were you late? And it's all the habitually late people and they explain why and how it.

[Zach Amico]

Happens all the time. That's such a good idea.

[Naim Ali]

That's a great idea. All right. I got a good reason. Now I'm late.

[Shannon]

Okay.

[Naim Ali]

And I can show you.

[Shannon]

Okay.

[Naim Ali]

You want to see it?

[Zia Anderson]

Yeah, please. I, I 100, though.

[Naim Ali]

This is, this is actually, I was late. My lawyer called me.

[Zia Anderson]

He.

[Naim Ali]

I had a settlement like not too long ago, and my lawyer called me, and I had referred somebody else to him. So now he's taking a case. Right?

[Zia Anderson]

Okay.

[Naim Ali]

So he called me, he said, yo, he said, come. You come to my office real quick. I'm like, well, no, I'm about to hit him. New York, what you got for me? He like, I got some money for you. Came out, just gave me like 500. Look at this.

[Zach Amico]

He just gave you cash?

[Naim Ali]

Gave me cash. He said, huh, bro? He said, thanks for hooking me up.

[Zach Amico]

I said, oh, wait, he has a $500 referral fee.

[Naim Ali]

Referral fee? Yeah.

[Zach Amico]

What?

[Naim Ali]

And he gave me 500 bucks.

[Zia Anderson]

All right, you know what?

[Naim Ali]

I had to stop to get the 500 bucks I had.

[Zia Anderson]

As much as I want to be mad at you about that, no, I'm.

[Naim Ali]

Not I need bro and this especially to come up here. I got to pay for parking and shit.

[Zia Anderson]

I totally get it.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah.

[Zia Anderson]

I'm not mad at you whatsoever. If I was on the way somewhere and somebody was like, hey, I need to give you $500, I probably would make a stop.

[Naim Ali]

And I was literally two exits away from the Center City exit. So I was like, just get off here. Go get the money. But then, you know how that goes. He started talking to me, showing me pictures of his dog.

[Zach Amico]

Oh, he's one of those.

[Zia Anderson]

Yeah.

[Naim Ali]

I showed him pictures of my dog and just, you know.

[Zach Amico]

Oh, no.

[Zia Anderson]

Which one of your friends was it? You almost wasted Red Drake, bro.

[Naim Ali]

Why you do that?

[Zia Anderson]

Hey, Zach, that was funny, dude. I got. Who was. Oh, this is right when I first started hanging out with Naim. We were in an argument in the lobby and I was arguing. We. We had watched Blacula with Monroe Martin and I made a joke that's like, do you think Blacula drinks blood? Cause it's red. And he didn't get it or he pretended not to get it. And then we were in the lobby having a conversation and I said, well, it's a stereotype. Black people like red drinks. And Monroe's like, I've never heard of that, Zach, you made that up. And Naeem comes with a red drink.

[Naim Ali]

Walk right in, walk right in.

[Zia Anderson]

And Naim, in his very colorful way, just. He said, blanks love red drinks. And he goes, monroe, stop acting all sophisticated.

[Naim Ali]

Me and Monroe from the same hood. We went to the same high school. He used to be a wild nigga. Monroe used to like. Cause he was like a group home kid, so he used to like. He was wild.

[Zia Anderson]

Yeah. And he's huge.

[Naim Ali]

And he's huge, so. But when I started doing comedy, I didn't even know that he did comedy. And then one day I came up here and I saw him at his show and he had glasses on and he was speaking like proper English and stuff like, what the fuck is happening here? Like, what did this happen? What did this transition happen?

[Zach Amico]

Did he start dating a white woman?

[Naim Ali]

I think so. Yeah, I think so.

[Zach Amico]

I have a sneaking suspicion you gotta get outed.

[Naim Ali]

Yeah, that'll clean you up.

[Zia Anderson]

Somewhere in the sunken place, the real Monroe's like, I love red drink.

[Shannon]

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[Zach Amico]

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[Shannon]

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[Zach Amico]

See, that's a stereotype I actually haven't heard. I'm still learning all kinds of the red drink. Yeah, I didn't know that.

[Naim Ali]

Well, that's because you're Hawaiian. Yeah, I don't think. I don't think all the racism makes it there.

[Zach Amico]

No, no. There aren't a lot of black people there. I knew four and two of them were brothers. And so that's not like that type of racism didn't make it out there. I don't think it's racism.

[Zia Anderson]

It's just.

[Naim Ali]

No, that's a stereotype. That's. Yes. Yo. Most stereotypes are true.

[Zach Amico]

It's true.

[Zia Anderson]

They all. I think they all start from somewhere, right?

[Naim Ali]

Yes, they all start from somewhere. Most of the is true. The watermelon that comes from black people being watermelon farmers because it was the easiest thing to grow.

[Zach Amico]

Oh.

[Naim Ali]

So and if you couldn't get a job, you're going to sell. You're going to grow watermelon and sell it and then also eat it. You see what I'm saying?

[Zach Amico]

Yeah, that makes sense. What about the fried chicken one? Where'd that come from?

[Naim Ali]

That's because fried chicken, again, it's a cheap meal. So during slavery, like plantation owners, slave masters and shit would give the spare parts of chicken and shit like that.

[Zach Amico]

How do you make something taste good?

[Naim Ali]

You fry it, put it in some grease, put some flour on it. Boom.

[Zia Anderson]

That's the same with. Why the stereotype white people don't be seasoning their food?

[Zach Amico]

Yeah.

[Zia Anderson]

It's. Cause white people were richer in some cultures and had access to higher cuts of meat, so they didn't need a.

[Naim Ali]

Million to be drowned in salt.

[Zach Amico]

Where did the mayonnaise one come from? What the fuck is it with white people in mayonnaise?

[Naim Ali]

Yeah, I don't know.

[Zia Anderson]

I don't know that one. I mean, it's true.

[Zach Amico]

It's true.

[Naim Ali]

Yeah. We won't get down. We won't fuck with mayonnaise.

[Zia Anderson]

I learned that from Undercover Brother. My favorite part of Undercover Brother is he's got. Cause he's Got like, all the James Bond gadgets, and one is just a watch with hot sauce in it.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah, that would actually be nifty.

[Naim Ali]

That is. Sometimes you need hot sauce.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah, you need hot sauce a lot of the time. It makes everything better.

[Naim Ali]

Yeah.

[Zia Anderson]

I'm my favorite. You seem. You seem Pooty Tang, right?

[Naim Ali]

Yes.

[Zia Anderson]

Dude, I think maybe the biggest laugh I've ever had in a movie theater is Pooty Tang when he says, my father died in an accident.

[Naim Ali]

Oh, the.

[Zia Anderson]

You know I'm talking about.

[Zach Amico]

It's been so long.

[Zia Anderson]

It's Chris Rock plays his dad. It's the most Louis CK Joke in it.

[Naim Ali]

Yeah.

[Zia Anderson]

Because Louis directed it.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Naim Ali]

I was so surprised when I found that out. I'm like, what the fuck?

[Zia Anderson]

And he goes, my father died in accident at the factory. And then it's just Chris Rock run at a factory and a gorilla beats him to death. It's so funny because it just catches you off guard.

[Naim Ali]

You're like, what the.

[Zia Anderson]

Did you wait for the accident? And then just a gorilla beats another factory accident. And we got a lot of fun to talk about, but let's get plugs out of the way first. Naim Zia, let's hear about your new show. And let's hear some dates, guys. Go ahead.

[Zach Amico]

It's coming out on the 6th.

[Naim Ali]

Yes, the 6th.

[Zach Amico]

The 6th. It's right after Legion of Skanks. Right. So it comes out at 10pm make sure that I have that right. 10pm on gas digital network. I'm so excited about this.

[Naim Ali]

Thanks.

[Zach Amico]

This has been so fun.

[Naim Ali]

We've been having so much fun just doing it. So much fun.

[Zach Amico]

Also, I feel like this is gonna be really bad for my anxiety because I am now researching serial killer nurses who are, you know, worked in all these different hospitals, like, all this crazy shit. And. And it just makes me look at everyone differently now.

[Naim Ali]

For sure. Yeah.

[Zach Amico]

But it's gonna be awesome.

[Naim Ali]

It's a great show. If you like True Crime, check us out. Even if you don't like True Crime, check us out. We're warning you of potential dangers.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah, exactly.

[Naim Ali]

There are scary people outside everywhere. Check out True Dad.

[Zia Anderson]

Okay. And you want to plug some dates?

[Naim Ali]

Yeah. When does this come out?

[Zia Anderson]

Today.

[Naim Ali]

Today?

[Zia Anderson]

Yeah.

[Naim Ali]

Yo. All right, Tomorrow I'm gonna be in Austin at the creek in the cave. Duragin A dare. Tag and friends. It's gonna be special guests. I can't tell you who. You gotta show up and you'll see I'm gonna be at the stand tonight. I don't know if this will be out before then, check my Instagram for the rest of my dates. Naim2ali. I'm gonna be everywhere this summer. Oh, I'm gonna be in LA September 4th and soldiers July 12th. Soldiers July 12th. I need everybody to buy tickets to that because that pays so much money for a sellout. Please.

[Zia Anderson]

Yeah, it really is.

[Naim Ali]

Please. I need a new car.

[Zia Anderson]

It sounds so dumb, but it'll change your summer.

[Naim Ali]

It'll change yourself. Yo, if I sell out, that Soldiers.

[Zia Anderson]

Is pretty good, bruh.

[Naim Ali]

That's gonna change my entire summer. So please, guys, this is how good.

[Zia Anderson]

Soul Trolls is just for people listening. The first time I headline Soldiers, they had a little green room for me with my name on it and a picture of me. And I was like, oh, wow, that's nice. And I walked in and there was a bottle of Jaeger, a bag of Sour Patch Kids and hot sauce.

[Naim Ali]

Yes. See?

[Zia Anderson]

And he was just like. I heard these are all the things you like.

[Zach Amico]

Yes, those are all great things.

[Zia Anderson]

It was great. Did you want to plug your other endeavors?

[Zach Amico]

I got only fans and I got YouTube. Both of those things are Zealand X I A L A N. I got a new machine for only fans that I'll be releasing somewhat soon. It's fucking intense. I went up to level 36, but apparently it goes to 100, so that's gonna be fun.

[Zia Anderson]

Okay.

[Zach Amico]

And then, yeah, YouTube. I stream three nights a week on YouTube. I eat food, I create weird things. I talk about nonsense. It's a good time.

[Zia Anderson]

Shannon, how much do you think it would be to get a Sybian? Let's go old school. But only guys. Only guys. We have to sit on the Civian while we do.

[Naim Ali]

Did that even do anything for Gus?

[Zach Amico]

I don't know.

[Naim Ali]

It just vibrate, don't it?

[Zia Anderson]

I bet. I bet if it hits your fucking gland.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah, true.

[Naim Ali]

Maybe.

[Zach Amico]

So I had a. I've. Well, I've known a lot of gay guys, but they keep telling me over and over again that straight guys are missing out.

[Naim Ali]

Really?

[Zach Amico]

Yeah. Because if you go up there, there's. What's it called that you hit?

[Zia Anderson]

Prostate.

[Zach Amico]

The prostate. Yeah. You hit the prostate. And apparently it's just like the most amazing thing ever.

[Naim Ali]

I can't.

[Zia Anderson]

It's a release button.

[Naim Ali]

My. My. Every time I take a shit, my eyes water. So I can't imagine. Every time I get to taking a.

[Zach Amico]

Shit, I'm like, what are you eating?

[Naim Ali]

I don't know.

[Zach Amico]

Yo, fiber. Fiber.

[Shannon]

It's about twelve hundred dollars.

[Zia Anderson]

That's because you think you're giving birth.

[Shannon]

It's about $1,200, Zach. What about $1,200?

[Zia Anderson]

Fuck that. Just get the clit sucker. If you love the show, and we know you do, go to gas digital.com today. The new Gas Digital. Use the promo code zoo. And what do you get? You get a $50 off a month from your subscription. You get episodes early ad free and uncensored. You get the archives of all the great shows on Gas Digital, including the former Real Ass Podcast, Lewis and Zach Show, Legion of Skanks, Zach Amigos, Midnight Spook show, and all this fun shit. And you get to go into the live chat and if you tell me on the road you subscribe with either of my promo codes, I'll kiss you on the mouth. All right.

[Zach Amico]

I mean, if you're not going to do it for any other reason but that one. Right.

[Zia Anderson]

All right, so we got some fun stuff to go over today. Love Island USA fans fuming over contestant dropping N word.

[Zach Amico]

Okay, what the hell is Love Island? I've heard people talk about it. What is it?

[Zia Anderson]

Shannon Channel? Explain it better than me.

[Shannon]

I would be happy to. It's a reality TV show. It's like all of the hottest people in their early twenties in the whole wide world. They live over the course of the summer, like a few months on this, like, little resort, and then they basically just kind of all each other.

[Zach Amico]

Oh, okay.

[Shannon]

So I'm going to show you a clip. It's. I couldn't find a not bleeped version, but you'll know when I can fill it in. Yeah.

[Naim Ali]

I'll do the. I'll do the heavy lifting.

[Shannon]

Also, I just want to preface this by saying the girl is Cuban and from Miami.

[Zia Anderson]

Okay.

[Zach Amico]

Oh, I mean, does that make it okay?

[Shannon]

Oh, let's go back.

[Zach Amico]

I missed it.

[Zia Anderson]

Are you that.

[Zach Amico]

That controls what she wears or.

[Naim Ali]

Right.

[Zach Amico]

You my perfect. But that's it. Like, now I'm my. He's mine. Like, bye.

[Zia Anderson]

Come on.

[Naim Ali]

Like, listen, there's no problem with that. And first of all, she's Hispanic. Where I'm from in Philly, if you Hispanic, you say. You can say nigga and don't nobody look at you twice. It's fine.

[Zia Anderson]

I think.

[Naim Ali]

And she's using it to mean, man, she's not using it racially.

[Zia Anderson]

Yeah, she's not.

[Naim Ali]

That's how I use it. I'll be like, yo, I'm about to go hang with my nigga Zach. That means, man, that don't mean a black person.

[Zia Anderson]

Yeah, I think interpretation wise, that is above board for me. I say Spanish gets it. I think most Arabs get it.

[Naim Ali]

Yes. Yeah, Arabs get it.

[Zia Anderson]

Arabs get it. And Koreans get it for one year of their life when they smoke weed for the first time.

[Naim Ali]

Yeah.

[Zia Anderson]

Koreans and Filipinos get it for one year, and it's when they. Every Filipino or Korean teenager, they smoke weed when they're 16, and then they think they're black for about a year.

[Naim Ali]

Yes. They listen to rap music.

[Zia Anderson]

Yeah.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah.

[Naim Ali]

I went to high school with some of those guys.

[Zia Anderson]

Yeah, I think you got it.

[Naim Ali]

And they're. Okay. They say it and we're like, whatever, bro.

[Zia Anderson]

Yeah, we're not going to. We're not going to make a thing about it. Yeah, it's not great.

[Naim Ali]

Yeah, it's not great.

[Zia Anderson]

Don't celebrate it.

[Naim Ali]

Yeah, but you can get away with it. We won't. We won't say anything you say. Also white people from Kensington, you can say it. That's the worst place on earth if you're from Kensington, Philadelphia, and you underneath them train tracks doing doping, smoking crack. Say, bruh, you doing way worse things already. Fuck it.

[Zia Anderson]

You know? Yeah. If you're gonna be grandfathered in.

[Naim Ali]

Yeah, fuck it. Fuck it.

[Zia Anderson]

Did you see that? There's a clip of a guy talking about Roast Battle. I was rap battling Eminem, and he's like, eminem called me the N word.

[Naim Ali]

Yes, I saw that.

[Zia Anderson]

And he goes. And then got away with it because of how good the rhymes were.

[Naim Ali]

Yeah, I saw there's.

[Zia Anderson]

You took my facial tissue. Turned into a racial issue. God damn, that's good.

[Naim Ali]

Yo. That is for sure a pass if it's a hot bar. I don't matter what race you are.

[Zia Anderson]

Because I remember they tried to get Eminem years ago for saying. Having an old demo where he had a thing about, like, how black don't trust black women.

[Naim Ali]

Yes. Yeah. Mm.

[Zia Anderson]

But that's when he, like, straight up used to wear, like, the Eminem clothes. Like, Eminem's on his clothes and shit.

[Naim Ali]

Yeah, yeah.

[Zia Anderson]

He still finded himself.

[Naim Ali]

Yeah, he was. I mean, and also. What? He grew up in a fucking trailer park. What do you want? What do you expect from this guy?

[Zia Anderson]

Yeah, it's probably how he talks. So I think. So this chick got fired from Love Island.

[Shannon]

No, no. So wait, I have a couple of things.

[Zia Anderson]

Yeah, please.

[Naim Ali]

So that Shannon. Do you say nigga sometimes?

[Shannon]

No, I do not.

[Naim Ali]

Damn. Can you say it right now?

[Zia Anderson]

She said it a few times between 12 and 1240.

[Naim Ali]

Where the is this?

[Shannon]

Okay, so first, the Eminem thing. Apparently they re released One of the videos, and it says he did not call that person the N word. So I could play you that little clip.

[Zia Anderson]

Sure.

[Naim Ali]

Oh, okay.

[Zia Anderson]

Oh, wow.

[Naim Ali]

Yeah, he didn't.

[Zach Amico]

He didn't.

[Naim Ali]

Okay. Yeah, he didn't say it.

[Zia Anderson]

Wow, look at that.

[Naim Ali]

All right.

[Shannon]

Clearing Eminem's name.

[Zia Anderson]

Thank you.

[Naim Ali]

Once you start saying that, you can't stop. So I, I didn't.

[Zia Anderson]

Chips.

[Naim Ali]

Yeah. Yes. Pringles. Yeah. Can't stop saying it. Okay, I'll try.

[Shannon]

Back to the shicks.

[Zia Anderson]

It's like crack. Black people use it the most. Go ahead.

[Shannon]

So the season just started, so they haven't actually started voting anybody off, but like, Twitter is just full of people saying, like, they're going to try to like, do their best to vote her off. What I feel like people are more angry about than her using the N word is she is a public Trump supporter.

[Zia Anderson]

Oh, well, that's the real.

[Naim Ali]

Oh, yeah. That's why they made that. She likes Trump.

[Shannon]

Yep.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah, that's nothing to do.

[Zia Anderson]

Also, by the way, also Cuban.

[Naim Ali]

Yeah, right? Yeah, yeah. And she's Cuban. Of course. She's a poor strong.

[Zia Anderson]

Whose joke is that? The second the other foot gets dry, Cubans are white. Yeah.

[Zach Amico]

Well, what about all the people that are pissed off at. What's his face about? The joke, the Cube. The joke he made about Cuba at the Trump rally.

[Zia Anderson]

That was Puerto Rico.

[Zach Amico]

Oh, that was Puerto Rico. Floating island of garbage. Yeah, yeah, that joke.

[Zia Anderson]

Yeah. I mean, yeah. My, my.

[Naim Ali]

Y' all gotta stop. White people gotta do that more.

[Zia Anderson]

Yeah.

[Naim Ali]

Start putting these Hispanics, Let these niggas know y' all not white. Them Asians, Indians, all these motherfuckers be trying to be white. Y' all not white.

[Zia Anderson]

I have Cuban family and I had a. I essentially call them my Cuban grandpa and grandma because my aunt married a Cuban guy and they kind of took my family in. My Cuban grandpa, when he filled out surveys, put down Caucasian.

[Zach Amico]

Oh, that's.

[Naim Ali]

Oh, of course.

[Zia Anderson]

You know, I'm not from Spain.

[Naim Ali]

Yeah.

[Zia Anderson]

And he, he was very adamant that.

[Naim Ali]

He was Caucasian and Cuba super racist, I heard. Yeah, super. Like the dark skinned Cubans catch. Hell, yeah. It's like 1960 down there.

[Zia Anderson]

I did.

[Shannon]

I know that.

[Naim Ali]

Yeah.

[Zia Anderson]

I threw my Cuban grandparents for a loot when we. This is. This story so old, it was still a landline. So my dad left when I was probably about 13, and whenever my mom wasn't home, I would pick up the phone as a black guy.

[Naim Ali]

Holy shit.

[Zia Anderson]

I learned that voice quick.

[Naim Ali]

Yeah, this is just.

[Zia Anderson]

Excuse me. Hello?

[Naim Ali]

Hey, who the Fuck is this?

[Zia Anderson]

Oh, sorry. Alice ain't home right now. And I would do it. I would do it all the time. And one time, like, he and Grandma Esther called, and I was like, ah, sorry. Alice ain't home right now. But she give you a call back, all right? And, dude, Esther called everybody.

[Naim Ali]

Oh, shit.

[Zia Anderson]

Esther went down the phone book that day. I called Alex's house, and who picks up a black guy? A black guy. I think she leave Paul for a black guy.

[Naim Ali]

Yeah.

[Zach Amico]

Esther is also a really white lady name, so.

[Zia Anderson]

Yeah. But I think it's like Esther's like the way Asians pick a. Oh, yeah.

[Naim Ali]

They pick a new name when they.

[Zia Anderson]

And it's always like an old lady name. Yeah, because they were Esther and Emilio. We called them Biggie in Little League.

[Zach Amico]

Okay.

[Naim Ali]

I took Mandarin in ninth grade. My teacher name was Henry Lee. And he. For sure his name wasn't Henry.

[Zach Amico]

Was not Henry.

[Naim Ali]

No.

[Zia Anderson]

No, I don't think so.

[Zach Amico]

It's like when you go get your nails done and they're like, what's your name? And their name.

[Zia Anderson]

His name was Henry. Hey, guys. Today's show is brought to you by our good friends at Yoo Kratom, home of the $60 kilo. If you do Kratom, if you don't, don't start on my account. If you use Kratom for some of its numerous purposes, there's only one place on earth to be purchasing it from, and that is our great [e-mail] why they have the best strains, the best customer service, and they're the marquee sponsor of everything we do here at Gas. You don't want to be going to smoke shops, bodegas, gas stations, and getting kratom where you don't even know what's inside of it, really. And then they have no answers there because Yokratom.com is in the business of getting you the best quality Kratom. Not only that, 60 bucks for a whole kilo delivered right to your door. There's no promo code needed because that's already a great deal in and of itself. One more time, guys. That's yo kratom.com home of the $60 kilo. Hey, let's get back into the program, right? Oh, yeah. So they just take the streets as a Trump supporter or whatever.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah.

[Zia Anderson]

All right, here's a. Here's a fun little. We like to do fun little animal stories here on the show because it's the zoo. Let's look at what happened to this grocery store in Thailand.

[Zach Amico]

Does it have raccoons?

[Zia Anderson]

No, I was hungry.

[Naim Ali]

What the hell?

[Shannon]

That's a whole elephant. Elephant.

[Naim Ali]

They hit every syllable so hard. Back out.

[Zach Amico]

Holy.

[Zia Anderson]

So apparently he walked in and what in the tweet, Chan? What is. I think he ate six bags of chips.

[Shannon]

Rice cake.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah, rice cake.

[Naim Ali]

Oh, so he just came in there because he was hungry.

[Zia Anderson]

He walked in, ate six bags of rice. Rice cakes, and then just back then walked out.

[Zach Amico]

Did he open the rice cakes?

[Zia Anderson]

I think he just tear them open.

[Naim Ali]

Yeah.

[Shannon]

Also a sandwich. A sandwich and bananas and nine bags of sweet rice crackers. Yeah. They said he didn't hurt anybody. He did minimal damage. He's fine.

[Naim Ali]

Yeah, he was hungry.

[Zia Anderson]

That's hilarious. There's a couple animals that like figure out how convenience stores work.

[Naim Ali]

Yeah.

[Zia Anderson]

Like run in and jack shit and run back out.

[Naim Ali]

Yeah.

[Zia Anderson]

So cute about it.

[Zach Amico]

Raccoons are one of them.

[Naim Ali]

Raccoons.

[Zach Amico]

Raccoons, yeah. They know how to open doors. They figure out where food is. Do you ever see the video of the raccoon trying to rinse his cotton candy?

[Zia Anderson]

Yeah.

[Naim Ali]

Like they got little thumbs. It looks like.

[Shannon]

Yeah.

[Zach Amico]

They just hold everything like this. I want a farm of raccoons.

[Naim Ali]

Yeah. I want raccoons and foxes. Yes.

[Zach Amico]

They're so cute.

[Naim Ali]

Fox. This is so cute. I need a pet fox.

[Zach Amico]

He's just trying to wash his food. He doesn't understand.

[Naim Ali]

Nope. Disappeared, bruh.

[Zach Amico]

He's like, where'd it go?

[Naim Ali]

He's like, what?

[Zia Anderson]

By the way, I will warn you, fox is adorable. Fox, like dogs. Maybe the worst dog.

[Zach Amico]

Really? Why?

[Zia Anderson]

Shiba inus.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah. They're so cute.

[Naim Ali]

Yeah, they're cute as hell.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah.

[Zia Anderson]

So cute. Absolute lunatics.

[Zach Amico]

Really.

[Zia Anderson]

Like maybe the most. I'm very nice when they're nice. But my dude, my sister in law has one.

[Naim Ali]

Yeah.

[Zia Anderson]

And I don't know if hers is like autistic or something. This, like when they order takeout, they literally have to be like, please turn off your headlights as you pull into the driveway. Leave it on the bottom step and then back out quietly.

[Naim Ali]

What?

[Zia Anderson]

Because the dog will attack everything in the house when it thinks somebody. What new is there?

[Zach Amico]

That's too much.

[Naim Ali]

Yeah, that's way too much. He might be too inbred or something.

[Zia Anderson]

There's something wrong. They wanted. So my brother in law wanted a dog that looked like a fox.

[Naim Ali]

Yeah.

[Zia Anderson]

So they went to a dude.

[Naim Ali]

Mm.

[Zia Anderson]

And then they got him and they were like, fuck. But then they already had him. They wanna.

[Naim Ali]

Damn.

[Zia Anderson]

And which I also like, I have. I know people that have like adopted dogs. And given them back. I don't think I could do it. I think I'd be like, I'm stuck with this.

[Naim Ali]

I did that. I gave a dog back. I. I bought a golden doodle for my daughter. And first one, the guy said it was a mini doodle. So he was like, yo, it's not gonna. It's only gonna get like this. It's gonna be tiny. So I'm like, all right, bet. No, like, six months later, this guy's £70. He's like this tall. Looks like a deer.

[Zach Amico]

Holy.

[Naim Ali]

Yeah. And then also, I wasn't training him because I thought he was gonna be a little cute ass dog for my daughter. Like, so we would be eating dinner, he'd just jump up on the table, start eating off of your plate and shit like that. I couldn't control him, so I had to give him back.

[Zia Anderson]

All right, well, that. I mean, that was false advertisement.

[Naim Ali]

That was false advertisement. That dog's way too big for my crib. You can't. You can't live with me, bro.

[Zach Amico]

Do you live in an apartment?

[Naim Ali]

I live in an apartment.

[Zach Amico]

See, I hate that. I see people all the time that have big dogs in apartments, and I'm like, that's so fucked up. It's, like, cramped up.

[Zia Anderson]

Yeah, that's tough on the dog.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah.

[Zia Anderson]

I mean, probably the cage at the pound isn't better, but.

[Zach Amico]

True. That's true.

[Naim Ali]

A golden dude is not gonna sit that long. Yeah, it'll be fine. Somebody probably took him with me. Yeah, I actually did the same thing. My ex wife, I had bought her dog for her birthday. This is when we were married. It was a cocker spaniel, and she does not know how to take care of animals at all. And then she sold that dog. I'm like, what the hell, man? How are you just gonna sell it? It's crazy.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah. See, that's why I don't have any pets. Because I know myself well enough to know if I was gonna have a pet, it would have to be a cat or something like that.

[Naim Ali]

So they can take care of yourself.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah, More low maintenance. I don't. I. I know myself well enough to know that. I just. That's not for me. There's a reason I don't have children.

[Naim Ali]

Yeah. Yeah. Dogs are, like, having kids.

[Zia Anderson]

Yeah.

[Naim Ali]

Just like having kids.

[Zia Anderson]

People turn cats into loan maintenance.

[Naim Ali]

How the did you think of that? You Adderall? How the you do that?

[Zach Amico]

This is why Zach was always perfect on Chip. Just the way his brain works. It was just literally perfect.

[Zia Anderson]

Oh, man. That made me happy. Thank you. All right, hey, let's keep it light. Parasailing, horror. Panicked woman unbuckles midair. Let's see how that goes. She. She was parasailing and got nervous and unbuckled herself.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah, that's the right.

[Zia Anderson]

So let's see how that goes for her. Well, the music makes it sound good.

[Shannon]

Sorry for the music. Let me play it.

[Naim Ali]

Dang. She a little thick in the hips.

[Zia Anderson]

Look at her.

[Naim Ali]

Okay.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah.

[Naim Ali]

Hey, lady, slow down. Don't.

[Zia Anderson]

All right.

[Naim Ali]

She's hot. She's a hot lady.

[Zach Amico]

Naim's like, this isn't even a challenging wank.

[Zia Anderson]

Let's go. What did she think was gonna happen?

[Naim Ali]

No. Why she throwing that, bruh? She looks like she's high as hell. And let's use context clues here. The music, her picture beforehand.

[Zia Anderson]

Yeah.

[Naim Ali]

This bitch is dead, isn't she?

[Zach Amico]

Yeah.

[Zia Anderson]

Oh, this bitch is super dead, Shannon.

[Shannon]

Yeah, she's very dead.

[Naim Ali]

What?

[Shannon]

But they don't. They don't. You know, I guess there's no way to ever really know what happened, but they assume she had an anxiety attack and wasn't paying attention. Her family doesn't think it was a suicide attempt, but they are investigating still. They don't know what happened.

[Naim Ali]

Wait, anxiety. What? Anxiety attack will make you unbuckle yourself.

[Zia Anderson]

It might make you be extremely irrational.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah.

[Naim Ali]

And so I got to get out of here.

[Zach Amico]

I've had panic attacks so many. So many.

[Zia Anderson]

Yeah.

[Zach Amico]

It makes you feel like. Like if you could get out of your skin. Like, if there was a way for me to pull my skin off and just, like, get out of myself. That's how it feels. So you freak out.

[Naim Ali]

I almost had one on the plane. They set me in the very back, like, the inside seat. And that inside seat in the very back had no window. And I'm sitting there, and I'm like, oh, I'm gonna lose it on here. I gotta get the out of here. I gotta get out of here. And I asked the stewards. I'm like, yo, gotta change seats. And she was like, well, after we get everybody seated, I'll see. And then she came back. She was like, yeah, we can move you up here. I was like, thank God. I was gonna lose it.

[Zia Anderson]

And then beyond a panic attack, my therapist tells me there's something called a trauma event, which basically means you think you might die, and then you're extremely irrational. So for her, that might have been a fight or flight where she literally was like, I can't be here.

[Naim Ali]

Yeah.

[Zia Anderson]

And was just. Didn't Damn it.

[Naim Ali]

Just start pulling.

[Zia Anderson]

It's like your adrenaline and shit takes over.

[Naim Ali]

Right, right, right.

[Zia Anderson]

Like I remember because I had, I had a really bad wound and then I was exhausted for like two days.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah.

[Zia Anderson]

And I was telling my. Cause like basically like it was like, it was like I was electric.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah. It fucks your adrenal glands basically. And then you're just drained afterwards. Yeah. I had so much.

[Naim Ali]

Yeah, I think I had one of those. I think I had a trauma, but I don't think I had a panic. I was close to having a panic attack. One time I got robbed and this was like probably, this was probably three weeks after my older brother got killed. So my older brother's friend got robbed and then my brother tried to help him and then the guy shot my brother and killed him. Three weeks later I'm getting robbed and the guy puts the gun in my face. And I just like, I just freaked out. Started running, running around and shit, screaming somebody out. Started freaking the fuck out. Ran all the way home. I was like, I might have been like two miles from my house. I was two miles from my mom's house and ran all the way there just full speed.

[Zach Amico]

That's why you never know how you're going to react in a situation until you're in that situation because you don't know what your body.

[Naim Ali]

Yeah. You don't know.

[Zach Amico]

I would like to think like I've had so many panic attacks over the years since I was 16. I've gotten really good at.

[Naim Ali]

Right.

[Zach Amico]

Like, like containing. Yeah. Bringing myself down. Like I can talk myself out of it. I can breathe sometimes. Sometimes I can't. And I just. But I also just have it. Cuz I know I'm just going to have the panic attack and then it's going to go away. It like peaks and then it. So I know if I just get through it. So I'd like to think I'd be fine, but I don't know.

[Zia Anderson]

This, this is fun. We can actually talk some therapy right now.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah.

[Zia Anderson]

So the two things my shout out. Dr. Wendy, my therapist said when I have panic attacks, the first that really helps me is count your teeth.

[Zach Amico]

Oh, I've never done that one.

[Zia Anderson]

Take your tongue and count your teeth and by the time you're done, you forgot you like you're out of it.

[Naim Ali]

Right, right, right.

[Zia Anderson]

And the other one is to memorize four or five things in the room. Color, object. So like if I was sitting here I would go green wall, red shirt, blue hat, you know, window, something. And you get it in that order. And you close your eyes and repeat it until it's a pattern. And there's something about distracting your mind with that that helps you breathe through it.

[Naim Ali]

Okay.

[Zia Anderson]

Yeah.

[Naim Ali]

Damn.

[Zia Anderson]

Because I'll get those at like, crowded places.

[Naim Ali]

Yeah.

[Zia Anderson]

And I just have to go sit down and like, count or do the. The, you know, green car, green grass.

[Naim Ali]

Right, right, right. Yeah.

[Zia Anderson]

And that really helps me.

[Naim Ali]

Damn. Well, you remember when you were in Philly, that's why we had to go pick my baby mama from the daycare. Right. I. I had to pick. She has her own car. I have to pick her up because she has panic attacks when she drives. Yeah. Like if she's driving by herself with our daughter, she just starts freaking out because she thinks, oh, so what if somebody crashes into me? What if. What if anything. So I had to. I have to go pick her up from the daycare. I have to go pick. Well, my. My baby mom owns the daycare, so I had to go pick her. My daughter up and drive her back home.

[Zach Amico]

How does she. Can she go grocery shopping? Or is it like she gets.

[Naim Ali]

She gets rides everywhere. Yeah. Like it's either me or her mom driving her around all the fucking time.

[Zach Amico]

Tell her to look into emdr.

[Naim Ali]

Emdr. Okay. I put that in my phone.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah, yeah. Write it down. Because I just. I've. I've done a ton of research on it and I'm going to start trying it for stuff like that. For me, because I'm also. Same thing. Planes, small spaces, anything that I can't get out of.

[Naim Ali]

Right, right.

[Zach Amico]

Holy shit. It's sucks I had to freak out on a plane too, like you. But I was like. I was like, I gotta get out of here. I gotta get out of here. And like I was saying, like, it was. It was really bad. This was years ago.

[Naim Ali]

So did they had they ground the flight?

[Zach Amico]

No, no, no. My husband was with me and he's really good at calming me down because I've had anxiety for as long as I've known him.

[Naim Ali]

Emdr.

[Zach Amico]

That's a great idea.

[Zia Anderson]

Zach.

[Zach Amico]

Concentrated on that.

[Zia Anderson]

Emdr, by the way, that I. We've. We've harped on it before, but the naim driving me through Philly is such a funny. Every part of it is. It was funny from the second we left New York.

[Naim Ali]

Yes.

[Zia Anderson]

Till we got to the comedy.

[Naim Ali]

Yes. It was the whole time.

[Zia Anderson]

We were. Everything was funny. We were fucking with each. We were making sure we left. But then anything that happened was funny.

[Naim Ali]

Yes. Like, literally everything was funny. And Then the simple fact that I was with you, I'm like, yo, this is going to be. We gonna see so much ghetto shit. I'm like, we gonna see so much ghetto shit. Zach will have so much material by the time we get to this goddamn show.

[Zia Anderson]

It was like the opposite of the green book. Like, it was him just showing me as black as Philly could get.

[Naim Ali]

Yes. Dude.

[Zia Anderson]

It was so like, bro, the icing on the cake.

[Naim Ali]

My baby mom brings my daughter outside from the daycare, and she has on pajamas with watermelons all over. Oh, my God, I never seen those pajamas for. I'm like, of all days to put these pajamas on her. You would do this when I got Zach in the car, like, what the fuck, dude?

[Zia Anderson]

And then it was the most beautiful. So where I'm in the front, his, his daughter, and his daughter's mother in the back. And we see on Market street in Philly, three children, one of which is a baby in diapers.

[Naim Ali]

Yes.

[Zia Anderson]

Doing TikTok dances on the roof. On the roof without a ledge?

[Naim Ali]

Yes. No ledge on the roof, no railing, nothing.

[Zia Anderson]

This baby's doing like the Fortnite Dance.

[Zach Amico]

Was there any diaper adults with them at all?

[Naim Ali]

No. No.

[Zach Amico]

Okay. Yeah, I didn't think so.

[Naim Ali]

There's three little black kids up on this roof dancing. Yeah.

[Zach Amico]

Holy shit.

[Naim Ali]

Yeah.

[Zia Anderson]

One fell off and bumped their head. So the naive's baby mama calls the police. First of all, she's like, we need to call the police. And Naim, I mean, he's like, they ain't my kids, right?

[Naim Ali]

I'm like, yeah. I'm like, why don't you just mind your business?

[Zach Amico]

Damn, that's such a city thing.

[Naim Ali]

It is.

[Zach Amico]

Mind your own business mind. Someone's getting murdered on the sidewalk. And you're like, I'm just gonna cross on the other side of the street.

[Zia Anderson]

But then I got to listen to, in a row, her call the police. And in her I'm talking to the police voice, explain the situation.

[Zach Amico]

Did she switch to, like, sound like a white lady real quick?

[Zia Anderson]

Very matter of fact. Here are the coordinates, officer. Yes, they are children unattended on a rooftop. And then I got to listen to her call her best friend and retell the story.

[Naim Ali]

Yes.

[Zia Anderson]

This girl. There's babies dancing on the roof, and I had a duck call the police.

[Naim Ali]

Yes.

[Zia Anderson]

And I'm just.

[Naim Ali]

And Naeem, dumbass over here talking about something. Mind my business. No, I'm not minding my business.

[Zia Anderson]

I'm like, yo, I'm vibrating this shit. I'm vibrating with Racist laughter.

[Naim Ali]

We dropped them off. I literally looked at Zach. I was like, all right now, Zach, I don't know what the fuck just happened, bro. I was like, all that ghetto shit, I ain't playing on that. I was like, I know you gonna say something about it on stage. You like, nah, nah, nah, I'm not going. As soon as he got on stage, started killing with that shit, I'm like, God, that's all I did that night. That's all you did.

[Zia Anderson]

I literally, I did 15 minutes of this is what happened when Naim drove.

[Naim Ali]

Me here and murdered so hard. That shit was crazy.

[Zia Anderson]

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[Zach Amico]

All right. Is this a thing in the hood? Because this is a big thing in Hawaii. All the babies have gold and silver teeth.

[Naim Ali]

Yeah.

[Zach Amico]

Because they feed them. Like they give them the bottle with just juice in it.

[Naim Ali]

Yes.

[Zia Anderson]

Yeah.

[Naim Ali]

So they get cavities. You got to get gold and silver cats.

[Zach Amico]

Straight up silver caps on a three year old's teeth. Everywhere.

[Naim Ali]

That's. And that kid is always a problem.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah.

[Naim Ali]

Kid with the silver and gold caps is a problem.

[Zia Anderson]

There was, I saw, such a insight into how I have no idea how to eat or take care of myself. My best friend is a 5 year old, and he came to my mom's house for a holiday. And, dude, just the way my mom searched for affection from this kid through treats, really. So this kid's gluten free. He's never had anything. This kid has water and, like, veggie sticks.

[Naim Ali]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Zia Anderson]

They're raising him super healthy, though.

[Naim Ali]

That is.

[Zach Amico]

That's so sad for a kid.

[Naim Ali]

That is. That's how my mom raised me. And I went crazy when I got to high school.

[Zia Anderson]

Crazy. I mean, they'll take him to, like, Denny's and shit, but, like, they're pretty careful with them. And, dude, first of all, my mom text me the morning of, what does Barrick drink? And I was like, scotch. He's five. I don't know.

[Naim Ali]

Fucking apple juice. I don't.

[Zia Anderson]

I don't fucking know. So I text my buddy, I'm like, my mom wants to know what Barrick drinks. And he goes, water. We're bringing it when we get there. My mom had Juicy juice, apple juice. Does Barrick want some juice? And they're like, no, he doesn't drink that. Mom's like, are you sure? And then this kid's gluten free. Whole life. My mom gets pizza. He loses his fucking gourd. Five years old, annihilates two slices.

[Naim Ali]

Of course. Of course.

[Zia Anderson]

And before he's done with the second slice, my mom is out with cupcakes.

[Naim Ali]

Oh, my God.

[Zia Anderson]

Then comes out with cookies and then puts a cake on the table. He loses fucking mind. Then she just sends him back out.

[Naim Ali]

Yeah.

[Zia Anderson]

Puts him in my friend's car. Like, all right, bye. I was like, this kid's gonna fucking.

[Naim Ali]

Yes. He gonna be bouncing off the wall.

[Zia Anderson]

He's gonna lift the car. Sure. He's never had any of those things before.

[Naim Ali]

That's crazy as shit. Can you imagine what's happening to his taste buds in his brain? Like, he was freaking out. I'm sure.

[Zach Amico]

Dude, legitimately, sugar has the same effect on your brain as, like, heroin and stuff.

[Zia Anderson]

Really?

[Zach Amico]

Yeah, because it's a. It's basically a drug that makes sense.

[Shannon]

Yeah.

[Naim Ali]

It's hard to quit sugar.

[Zach Amico]

It's hard to quit sugar. But I still think with that, what you see, there's just two extremes. It was. They were too extreme. And then on the other side is also too extreme. You can't go too far one way or the other.

[Zia Anderson]

They're Very. It's a cognitive thing. He's. He's on the spectrum.

[Naim Ali]

Okay.

[Zia Anderson]

A lot of people on the spectrum, they try and avoid gluten.

[Naim Ali]

Yeah.

[Zia Anderson]

Because it's bad for cognitive thinking and development.

[Zach Amico]

Shit.

[Zia Anderson]

I have a cousin who's basically on the. Was on the same regimen, but all it did was make her fiend for bread.

[Naim Ali]

Yes. Yeah.

[Zia Anderson]

She was non verbal, dude. If people left her with bread, that shit was done.

[Zach Amico]

Is magical.

[Naim Ali]

It is amazing. You do some cinnamon. Some cinnamon raisin swirl, bro.

[Zia Anderson]

I read a thing that made me want to fudgeing. First of all, you see people are mad at Cuomo for fucking. They said what's. They asked him his New York breakfast and he goes, a bacon, cheese and egg.

[Naim Ali]

Oh, no.

[Zach Amico]

He fucked it up. He couldn't even say that.

[Naim Ali]

I'm not even from New York and I know that that's wrong with a.

[Zia Anderson]

Bacon, cheese and egg on an English muffin.

[Naim Ali]

What the heck?

[Zia Anderson]

I don't like bagel. I try to avoid bagels.

[Naim Ali]

What the fuck type of Italian is this guy?

[Zia Anderson]

The worst.

[Naim Ali]

The worst.

[Zia Anderson]

The worst. I will never forgive a man for bacon, cheese and eggs. Yeah, it's like the same when they got JLO for being. Being fucking fake ghetto. They asked her what her bodega order was and she's like that. Ham and cheese, if you know what I'm talking about.

[Zach Amico]

Ham and cheese.

[Naim Ali]

Ham and cheese.

[Zia Anderson]

Yeah. Like, she's like, if you know, you know. And then it was all things.

[Zach Amico]

And everyone was like, no, we don't know.

[Naim Ali]

Yeah. The fuck are you talking about?

[Zia Anderson]

But yeah, they got. I read a thing that a New York bagel is equivalent to eating half a loaf of bread.

[Naim Ali]

Yeah, that's crazy.

[Zach Amico]

You can't do it all the time, but God damn it, they're good.

[Naim Ali]

Yeah.

[Zach Amico]

Bacon, egg and cheese, salt, pepper, ketchup.

[Zia Anderson]

I had a. Dude, I go to this Jewish place called Shellsky's and they have a Szechuan peppercorn bagel.

[Zach Amico]

Oh, my God. That sounds.

[Naim Ali]

That sounds crazy.

[Zia Anderson]

It's really spicy. It's really good.

[Zach Amico]

Have you ever had a French toast bagel?

[Zia Anderson]

Yes, actually. One of my big.

[Naim Ali]

Now I want one.

[Zia Anderson]

One of my. Damn if I can ever get it. One of my favorite weekend treats. Sausage, egg and cheese on toasted French toast bagel.

[Zach Amico]

That sounds amazing.

[Zia Anderson]

Basically, what I refer to as the elevated McGriddle.

[Naim Ali]

Yeah, there you go. That's the best sandwich McDonald's has.

[Zach Amico]

It is.

[Naim Ali]

Out of all of.

[Zia Anderson]

I just did this on Sam Roberts yesterday, but I want to show You. I was on the road and I was in the south and I had two different fast food breakfasts that blew my balls off.

[Naim Ali]

Okay?

[Zia Anderson]

So Shannon, could you please look up.

[Naim Ali]

The.

[Zia Anderson]

Bo Berry Biscuit from Bojangles?

[Naim Ali]

Okay. Damn. I ain't been a Bojangles as a little ass kid.

[Zach Amico]

I've heard about it. I've never been.

[Zia Anderson]

Dude, we're, we're. I was on the road. Icp doing the wrestling. And it was me, Willie Mack, who's a very. Could you look it up with the one with sausage?

[Naim Ali]

Oh, what the hell. It was good as shit.

[Zach Amico]

God damn, that looks amazing.

[Zia Anderson]

It was me, my friend, Willie Mack, who's a large, proud blackman. And another gentleman's last name.

[Naim Ali]

Yeah, Like. Like he's a Jewish. Like he's a Jewish guy. Black man.

[Zia Anderson]

That's it. So that's what I had.

[Naim Ali]

Oh, that looks great.

[Zach Amico]

Awesome.

[Zia Anderson]

That was so good. And then our other friend Congo Kong, who's black dude, we pulled up the Bojangles. And when I say this little town in South Carolina was not prepared for me and two giant black guys to get out of a van and go to Bojangles, they were like, look at them. They love it.

[Naim Ali]

They had to run to the store, grab some more shit, need more supplies.

[Zia Anderson]

It was so fucking. Also there was another giant guy, Sam Stackhouse. And then Shane Mercer, who's like a big bodybuilder guy. We were quite the group. Damn. But that Boberry Biscuit, Incredible. And now, Shannon, I need you to search. The place is called Raise the Roost.

[Naim Ali]

Oh, that's a good name.

[Zia Anderson]

And it is the Chicken, Egg and Cheese Biscuit.

[Naim Ali]

Okay.

[Zia Anderson]

Now these are. It's a fast food place, but it's also connected to 7 11. So it'll have a fried chicken counter in the 7 11.

[Naim Ali]

Okay.

[Zach Amico]

We don't have good 7 11s here.

[Zia Anderson]

No, we don't.

[Zach Amico]

My dream would be to open an Asian 7 11.

[Zia Anderson]

Oh, Japanese 711 in New York.

[Naim Ali]

Oh, that'd be nice.

[Zia Anderson]

This is it. This is exactly it.

[Zach Amico]

That looks amazing.

[Naim Ali]

That looks great.

[Zia Anderson]

When I tell you the chicken was as good as like the Popeyes chicken sandwich.

[Naim Ali]

Yes.

[Zia Anderson]

But that egg and cheese, that looks so good, buddy. I was beside myself on how good that shit was.

[Zach Amico]

Those little fast food hash browns are amazing.

[Naim Ali]

They are so fucking good. They're so good.

[Zach Amico]

Oh, my God. I don't know.

[Naim Ali]

You can't buy them. I don't buy hash browns. And they don't taste like that.

[Zia Anderson]

Ore Ida does them. You gotta do them in the Ore Ida you got to do them in the air fryer. Obviously, putting them in the fryer would be best.

[Naim Ali]

Yeah.

[Zia Anderson]

Air fryer. They're great.

[Naim Ali]

Okay. All right. All right. So that's where I'm up. I'm throwing them in the oven. Throw them in the microwave and shit.

[Zia Anderson]

Yeah, yeah.

[Zach Amico]

Air fryer, microwave. Any of it?

[Zia Anderson]

Yeah, anything supposed to be crispy. You gotta air fry.

[Naim Ali]

Yeah. Okay.

[Zia Anderson]

Have you had the Taco Bell hash brown?

[Naim Ali]

No.

[Zach Amico]

Is it good?

[Zia Anderson]

Excellent. And they do it in the crunch wrap.

[Naim Ali]

Damn.

[Zia Anderson]

So they do a crunch. A bacon, egg and cheese or sausage? Egg and cheese crunch. Wrap with the head instead of having the tortilla in it. It's a hash brown.

[Naim Ali]

Damn. That's fire.

[Zach Amico]

Okay. I gotta go to a Taco Bell. The last time we went to Taco Bell, because the Taco Bell in our.

[Zia Anderson]

Town, there it is.

[Zach Amico]

Where we live, is a. God, that looks amazing.

[Naim Ali]

That looks good as hell.

[Zach Amico]

Is a. It's a hole. Like, literally, It's a. It's 45 minutes to get your food. You don't get half your order. When we first moved there, we ordered delivery from Taco Bell. We're like, it. It's like 2 o' clock in the morning. Let's get some Taco Bell. They sent us like two out of the eight things that we ordered. And one thing that we didn't order at all.

[Naim Ali]

What?

[Zach Amico]

They just. Yeah, I was like, so we don't. We don't go to that Taco Bell anymore. But at some point I want to go try all that.

[Naim Ali]

That's the worst. When you order. When you go to a fast food place and they just give you all the wrong. That's why I stopped going to checkers. That's. That was it for me. Every. I went to Checkers like three times in a row.

[Zia Anderson]

It's called checkers because you have to check the bag. Because they're not gonna give you what you ordered.

[Naim Ali]

It's never what you is. I'm literally never. It's almost like they do it on purpose. Like, they're like, man, what you said. Here you go.

[Zach Amico]

I understand that it's fast food, but fast food is now paying like 20 bucks an hour.

[Naim Ali]

Yes, it is.

[Zach Amico]

Places. So it's not like you have a real job. Come on.

[Naim Ali]

Yeah. This isn't five, 15 hour. You got a real job.

[Zia Anderson]

Yeah. Those are the ones that are on the books, though. Sometimes you go to McDonald's at 3 in the morning.

[Naim Ali]

Yeah.

[Zia Anderson]

And you get, like, at those hours, you get the. The. The Mexican. Mexicans Yeah, no English. The hamburger. I don't know. Because my favorite thing used to be. Because I love. I love fast food breakfast, but there's nothing better than staying up for fast food breakfast after partying all night.

[Naim Ali]

Yeah.

[Zia Anderson]

And my favorite would be to go to the 24 hour McDonald's and wait for them to switch over, which is usually right around when the bars close.

[Naim Ali]

You got all the fresh bruh.

[Zia Anderson]

And I would go and wait and I would walk because I live in a neighborhood where it's all guidos partying, and they call it Bar Ridge. So it's all the drunk Italians from Staten island trying to order hamburgers. And it's like the C squad working at MC McDonald's. They're like, he's breakos. And then some guy like, I know you got burgers back there. We just want cheeseburger. Oh, iz breakos. No hamburger. All right, so here's a fun thing, and I think appropriate for our guests. This is a fun little list. How celebrities tip according to readers who serve them. So let's take a look at some celebrities.

[Zach Amico]

I've served so many celebrities.

[Zia Anderson]

Yeah, can you get. Can you give us who's been good tippers?

[Zach Amico]

Yes. Okay. Pedro Pascal. Great tipper.

[Naim Ali]

Okay.

[Zach Amico]

Super nice dude.

[Naim Ali]

Yeah.

[Zach Amico]

Usher. Tips pretty good. Met him.

[Naim Ali]

Okay.

[Zach Amico]

Adam Levine. Tips crazy good.

[Naim Ali]

Nice.

[Zach Amico]

He's really, really nice. Brad Wilk, the drummer for Rage against the Machine. Super nice guy. Tips really well. He used to come in with Juliet Lewis all the time. His girlfriend. I don't know if they're still together or not. Also super nice. Some people that tip like, complete and utter shit. The dude with the mustache that played Master Chief from Orange is the New Black.

[Naim Ali]

Okay, okay.

[Zach Amico]

Hate that guy. He's such an asshole. Anyway, him. And then what about the. All about that bass singer? I always forget her name.

[Zia Anderson]

I don't remember.

[Naim Ali]

I don't know.

[Zach Amico]

Meghan Trainor.

[Naim Ali]

Okay.

[Shannon]

Her.

[Zia Anderson]

Thank you.

[Zach Amico]

Horrible tippers. You're welcome.

[Zia Anderson]

Good to know.

[Naim Ali]

I would think they would all tip.

[Zach Amico]

Well, they don't.

[Naim Ali]

They're rich as fuck.

[Zach Amico]

They don't.

[Zia Anderson]

Some people just don't believe in it.

[Naim Ali]

Yeah, that's not. If you listen. You catch me on a payday, I'm tipping like a millionaire. You might catch it. You might get a 50 out of me. You see what I'm saying?

[Zach Amico]

That's what I do. It's because I worked in service for so long, I tipped Tip like, I tip crazy every time.

[Zia Anderson]

Yeah.

[Zach Amico]

I can't. And I don't go out that much.

[Zia Anderson]

So I'm like that at bars because my. I grew up with my mom bartending.

[Naim Ali]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Zia Anderson]

So, like, I walk in and I immediately put a 10 or 20 down for my first drink.

[Naim Ali]

Yeah.

[Zia Anderson]

And that way they know, like, oh, hey, I understand.

[Zach Amico]

Like, and they'll take care.

[Zia Anderson]

And we also now have an understanding.

[Naim Ali]

Yeah, yeah, exactly. Exactly. And you get better service.

[Zia Anderson]

100. But also, like, they're happier to serve.

[Naim Ali]

Like, yeah, it makes sense.

[Zia Anderson]

Like, one of my. If I see somebody starting their shift, I'll give her a 10 and go, this is good luck money for your shift.

[Zach Amico]

Nice.

[Zia Anderson]

And that, like, to me, like, I'm like, oh, I just made their day better.

[Naim Ali]

Yes.

[Zach Amico]

Oh, 100%. And it's not.

[Zia Anderson]

10 bucks is fucking 10 bucks.

[Naim Ali]

Yeah, right.

[Zia Anderson]

I was gonna spend it on a drink anyway. And usually most places, if the owner's not a dick, you get buybacks or they. This one's on me. Usually every third one. If you're tipping the price of the drink.

[Naim Ali]

For sure. Yeah, definitely.

[Zia Anderson]

I think it kind of evens out.

[Zach Amico]

Yep. No, absolutely.

[Naim Ali]

Especially at, like, comedy clubs and shit.

[Zia Anderson]

Nothing makes me madder. When comedy clubs give you one drink.

[Naim Ali]

That's crazy, dude.

[Zia Anderson]

The way I tip when. If I'm headline, even if I'm featuring.

[Naim Ali]

Yes.

[Zia Anderson]

I know I'm tipping at least 20 or $30.

[Naim Ali]

Yeah, exactly.

[Zia Anderson]

And I do. There's a club that made me so fucking mad. And then I said it on the air. And people started tweeting them, but I had to ask them to stop. It was me, Andy, and Chris.

[Naim Ali]

Okay.

[Zia Anderson]

And we each ordered. I think Chris got a Heineken. I don't remember what Andy got. And I got, like, a Makers on the rocks. And then they charged us full price for them. And I was like, oh, no, no, I'm. I'm headlining. Whoa. And they went, yeah, we don't do. That's gonna be $50.

[Naim Ali]

What?

[Zach Amico]

Holy.

[Zia Anderson]

And I took out the. In front of the manager, I took out the money, and I tipped the lady, I think, whatever, five or six bucks. And I said, hey, just so you know, this 50 I'm paying you was gonna be your tip on those drinks. And I need you to tell your manager that. Cause I would have hung out all night and tipped you another hundred.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah, but the manager, they don't care because it's the. They want to make money.

[Zia Anderson]

They would have.

[Zach Amico]

I know.

[Zia Anderson]

And by the way, what does a hiking cost them? A quarter.

[Zach Amico]

I know.

[Naim Ali]

Yeah, right.

[Zach Amico]

But they're fucking. I, I, I know places like that. Oh, God.

[Zia Anderson]

Maybe I'm. Maybe I'm a dick for thinking, but I always think performers. I'm not saying fucking let them. I'm not saying, like, every comic who's in the building. No, if you're on the show, I'm on the show.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah.

[Zia Anderson]

And don't be a dick. Don't order, like, fucking high shelf.

[Naim Ali]

Yeah. We're not going top shelf. You're not getting two, three drinks at one time. But if you're on the show, yes, you should be able to drink. They tried that shit at Helium in Philly. It wasn't the manager, though. It was like. The owners was like, yo, I don't know. For some reason they just came one night and just saw all the comics there hanging out, and they were like, look, you gotta cut this shit back. We want you closing the doors at fucking 11 o' clock or 11:30 as soon as the show's over. No comics, just hanging here, drinking all night. People getting free drinks. Fuck all that. And they told the staff that and they told the manager that. And the manager came straight up to us and was like, we not changing shit. Y' all keep coming here, drinking, partying, like. Cause the thing is, we're there performing on a weekly basis damn near, like, all throughout, you know, from. From Monday to Wednesday. There's nothing going on at a comedy club, so they rely on, like, the local people to do shit. So, like, why would we. Why would they tell us not to come there and hang when we're there performing on the nights when nobody's coming there?

[Zach Amico]

Owners sometimes are so stupid with that stuff. It's like they don't understand the big picture and the whole point of it.

[Zia Anderson]

Well, it's. It's nickels and dimes.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah.

[Zia Anderson]

To when you could be making.

[Naim Ali]

Yeah, 20, right? Yeah, exactly. Like, it's crazy.

[Zia Anderson]

And then it's like. It's nickels and dimes out of their pocket to give their servers real money.

[Naim Ali]

Yeah, yeah, exactly.

[Zia Anderson]

Maybe I also have never run a successful bar, so maybe. I don't know. Maybe I'm a fucking asshole.

[Zach Amico]

No, I think you need to hang on to good servers and good bartenders because, like, service is what keeps people coming back to a place. It's good food.

[Zia Anderson]

You guys always step at a hotel?

[Zach Amico]

Always? Yeah.

[Naim Ali]

Like at a hotel bar, just like.

[Zia Anderson]

No, no. If you stay, do you leave money in the room for the.

[Naim Ali]

No, I tip room service, but I don't leave money, like, on the fucking.

[Zach Amico]

For the housekeepers. I do.

[Naim Ali]

I didn't even think about that till. Y' all said it. It's.

[Zach Amico]

Because I swear it's. No, don't. I mean, it's.

[Zia Anderson]

Not everybody does. Some people. I try to. If it's. If I'm there more than a day, definitely. Cause I read recently that housekeepers don't get paid hourly. They get paid per room.

[Zach Amico]

Really? I didn't know that.

[Zia Anderson]

In some places, yeah.

[Zach Amico]

When I did it, I got paid hourly.

[Zia Anderson]

You got paid hourly?

[Zach Amico]

Yeah.

[Naim Ali]

Yeah.

[Zia Anderson]

I've read in some places you get paid per room.

[Zach Amico]

Okay. Damn. Yeah, See, that's why, though. It's. I think a lot of times people don't think about that stuff. And I get it. Like, I wasn't mad when people didn't tip me for a house. Like, because not every. You're right. Not everyone does. But it was nice when people did. It was like, oh, shit, someone left it.

[Zia Anderson]

Yeah, yeah. If I just stayed somewhere and I didn't fuck it up and I, like, literally just slept in the bed and left. I'll leave a couple bucks.

[Zach Amico]

I left five today because of that. We stayed one night.

[Zia Anderson]

I'll leave a couple bucks if I know I fucked the room up, right? Like I was eating chicken wings in bed. You're getting a 10 or 20 sometimes.

[Zach Amico]

It's nasty. This wasn't me. This was my friend who I worked with. There were these gay dudes staying in one of the rooms, and when she cleaned it out, she had to throw the sheets out because there was blood all on the sheets. And, like, I think there was some on the sheets, too.

[Naim Ali]

Like they were doing.

[Zach Amico]

They were doing some butt fucking in there.

[Zia Anderson]

That's what hotels are for.

[Zach Amico]

Nasty.

[Naim Ali]

Oh, my God.

[Zach Amico]

Nasty. I don't think they tip, though, which is crazy. Like, if you're gonna leave blood on the sheets, leave a 20, you know?

[Zia Anderson]

God damn, I've left a 20 or two. Not from blood, but, you know, from oops to doodles. So it happens, I always say, when you stay in a room with two beds by yourself, one bed is for sleeping, one bed is for masturbating and eating. That's how I split up my bed. Cause, you know, you finish your business and you're like, now I'm gonna go back into the clean bed, yo. After I've been wiping my mouth with sheets, right?

[Naim Ali]

With the sheets.

[Zia Anderson]

I think the most I ever left after one of the. After the first skank fest Vegas, I think I left 50 in chips and an 80 voucher for the lady. I was there for a week. I was there for a week.

[Zach Amico]

That's nice.

[Zia Anderson]

And I also couldn't. I didn't have time to go cash either of those things in. And I was like, oh, this is just an errand. But also, I'm sure this is a hell of a fucking good day for this. 130 bucks extra.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Naim Ali]

No, for sure. That's definitely a good day. Extra 130. Yeah.

[Zia Anderson]

But that was like. I was there for like. And that was like the nice suite at the Cirque.

[Naim Ali]

Okay.

[Zia Anderson]

So I felt like. And that was after they did a wellness check on me.

[Zach Amico]

Why do they need to do a wellness check?

[Zia Anderson]

Sir, you haven't left your room in 36 hours.

[Naim Ali]

Yo.

[Zia Anderson]

You had your do not disturb sign up for 36 hours and no one's seeing you.

[Naim Ali]

You were that fucked up.

[Zia Anderson]

It was after Skank Fest.

[Naim Ali]

Yeah.

[Zia Anderson]

So I was. I was. I think I left the Go flu.

[Naim Ali]

That fucking illness we get.

[Zia Anderson]

Yeah. The crowd.

[Naim Ali]

Yeah.

[Zia Anderson]

And I think I. Maybe I was pretty fucked up.

[Naim Ali]

Yeah.

[Zia Anderson]

I think I left to like, go get like sodas and shit at one point, but nobody saw me.

[Naim Ali]

Okay.

[Zia Anderson]

But then I found out from other people that's both. That whole thing is not also necessarily because they send up two people.

[Naim Ali]

Right? Right.

[Zia Anderson]

One is the guy talking to you and there's another guy standing far behind him. And they told me that's because of the Vegas shooter.

[Naim Ali]

Oh, shit.

[Zia Anderson]

And that they're checking to make. See what's going on. So the guy that's talking to you is the distraction.

[Naim Ali]

Yeah, yeah.

[Zia Anderson]

The guy that's watching is scoping out to see what's going on in your room.

[Naim Ali]

Right, right, right.

[Zach Amico]

Do they train people for this? They're training their hotel staff.

[Naim Ali]

That's wild.

[Zia Anderson]

I'm sure there's a million things we have. No, dude, think about Casino. Like all the shit they know. True. Like the pit bull. Like how many letter levels up the ladder there. You know, there's the pit boss. This guy. This. This guy answers to this guy. I'm sure security is the same way.

[Zach Amico]

That's true. But I feel like that's only at nice, like, casinos, nice places. Like if you're just going to stay at a regular.

[Naim Ali]

Oh, yeah, Normal ass. No, that's not a Holiday Inn. They're not doing it. You actually did in that room for a week.

[Zia Anderson]

That's just an Indian guy who doesn't want to hear that the toilet doesn't work.

[Naim Ali]

Yeah. I remember three Skank Fests ago. We weren't like invited there. We just went out there just to hang with our friends and Shit. And so we all stayed in Lamar's room. It was like 10 of us staying in Lamar's room. And the next morning we woke up, we all got showers and shit. Then we left. Lemaire had been out the whole night, so when we were leaving, he was coming back to go to sleep. So we're leaving. He comes back and he calls me angry as fuck, like, yo, what the fuck is wrong with y' all? I'm like, what? He was like, so, what, did you guys just all take turns just pissing on the bathroom floor? I'm like, bro, we took showers. What the fuck type of childhood did you have where you assumed we all just took turns pissing on your bathroom floor, bro? I'm like, what the fuck is wrong with you? Why would we do that? Why would we piss on your floor?

[Zach Amico]

I mean, I.

[Naim Ali]

That's crazy.

[Zach Amico]

I've seen people get wasted and piss on hotel walls. It happens.

[Naim Ali]

It happens. But this is at, like, 10:00am yeah, yeah. He was the one out drinking and partying the whole night. We didn't even out there late the night before. He's coming back. We're leaving. 10:00am we all took shower. First of all, you could smell piss.

[Zach Amico]

That's true.

[Naim Ali]

Like, piss has a smell.

[Zach Amico]

It does.

[Naim Ali]

Especially if eight or nine men took turns pissing on the floor. Come on. Like, what are we even doing here? And he was like, oh, well. I mean, you guys could at least, like, cleaned it up. And I'm like, all right. I'm like, you better take a shower now. Come clean it up now. He was like, no, I'm going to sleep then. Shut up. Shut up. I'll see you when you wake up. Like, what he's saying, it's crazy.

[Zia Anderson]

I heard a great story of a deathmatch wrestling company getting banned from a hotel. One of the wrestlers had a party after the show, and all the guys went, and they were still bleeding.

[Naim Ali]

Oh, yeah, yeah.

[Zia Anderson]

And they were doing drugs all night and drinking. And then they all kind of passed out, woke up and left. And they called the guy whose room the name the room was in. And they're like, hey, sir, I'm sorry. We have some issues. We found some blood in your room. And he immediately. He's a old guy, so he's got his draft. He's like, oh, yeah, my girlfriend's on her period. I apologize. And they go, sir, it's on the curtains and the walls, and the entire bathroom sink is covered in blood. And he's like, yeah, my girlfriend's on her Period. What do you want?

[Zach Amico]

I'm just picturing how a girl on her period would get blood all over the curtain.

[Zia Anderson]

It was like, on the ceiling. Well, it was my one friend, and I won't incriminate the man whose room it was. It was my friend, hardcore hillbilly. He had taken a light tube shot in the back and fell asleep sitting up on the wall.

[Naim Ali]

Oh, shit.

[Zia Anderson]

So he fell asleep, slid down the wall.

[Naim Ali]

Yeah. And just made a street.

[Zia Anderson]

All right, so let's look at some of these celebrities talking about who was good, a good tipper and a bad tipper.

[Shannon]

First one is T. Pain. Do you guys want to guess or just want me to tell you?

[Zia Anderson]

Yeah, let's guess. T. Pain.

[Naim Ali]

T. Pain's a good tipper, I think, because he was. He blew all his money at one point in time. I think people like that.

[Zia Anderson]

I think. I think somebody that balls out and it's part of the image to tip good.

[Naim Ali]

Yeah.

[Zach Amico]

Yep.

[Zia Anderson]

Shannon.

[Shannon]

So it says T. Pain once tipped $2,000 on an $800 bill.

[Naim Ali]

Damn. That's crazy.

[Zach Amico]

Why didn't I ever get those people T. Pain ever come in?

[Naim Ali]

What the fuck, right? That's some baller shit.

[Zia Anderson]

I love it. Shannon. Keep it going.

[Shannon]

Number two, Bruce Willis, I bet.

[Zia Anderson]

Great.

[Naim Ali]

Great tipper.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah, I would think.

[Naim Ali]

He seems like he respects people that are public image. Yeah, true.

[Shannon]

He tips 100% on the card and then 100% in cash.

[Naim Ali]

Wow.

[Zach Amico]

Wow.

[Naim Ali]

Nice. Very nice.

[Zach Amico]

Amazing.

[Shannon]

Kenan Thompson.

[Zach Amico]

I think he tips good.

[Naim Ali]

No, I don't think Kenan Thompson tips good, man.

[Zach Amico]

He seems like a nice dude. I don't know.

[Naim Ali]

He seems nice, but he don't be paying for them Keenan and friends shows at AC. He don't pay for them. Make $40 doing that dumb ass show.

[Shannon]

It says, best tipper at New York City nightclub was Tina. Tina Thompson tipped 100%.

[Zach Amico]

Nice.

[Naim Ali]

Okay, nice. Take it back.

[Zach Amico]

He's got a vibe about him.

[Naim Ali]

He does seem like a nice guy.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah.

[Shannon]

Sebastian Stan.

[Naim Ali]

I don't know who that is.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah, I was like, who's Sebastian Stan? I thought Sebastian Maniscalco for a second. Not him.

[Zia Anderson]

You gotta take.

[Zach Amico]

Oh, Sebastian Stan Winter soldier. I'm an idiot.

[Naim Ali]

Oh, I hope he tips good. I like this guy. Yeah, I hope he tips good. He looks like he tips good. He's a marvel guy. They make $10 million a minute.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah, he better tip good.

[Naim Ali]

He has to tip good.

[Shannon]

It says.

[Zia Anderson]

You remember when you. I gotta do Sebastian tipping now. You remember when you were a kid, your. Your. Your dad would take out his wallet. You have to do the card in his wallet. How much? You tip and you move the decimal point. Not me. I just take the money, I go boom. Sorry. Go ahead.

[Shannon]

It says he gave a thousand dollars to each staff member on the set of a different man.

[Zia Anderson]

That's awesome.

[Naim Ali]

Oh, yeah, that's nice.

[Shannon]

God, Jim Belushi, bad.

[Zach Amico]

Bad. Yeah, yeah.

[Naim Ali]

Bad timber. His sloppy looking ass.

[Shannon]

It says, Jim Belushi always gave me 100 to $200 on his regular $28 tab.

[Zia Anderson]

Good for him.

[Shannon]

It was oysters and one seltzer with bitters.

[Zia Anderson]

Good for him.

[Zach Amico]

All right. That's awesome.

[Shannon]

Lady Gaga, great temper.

[Zach Amico]

I could see her tipping bad.

[Naim Ali]

Yeah, I don't know. She was rude to her dog walker that fucking got killed or whatever the fuck.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah, I forgot about that.

[Naim Ali]

Yeah, I don't know about her. She seems like a rude Lady Gaga.

[Shannon]

And her boyfriend left a $700 tip on a $42 bill.

[Zach Amico]

Damn, Sam, I take it back. These are all just. They all just tip good.

[Zia Anderson]

Is it? Did anybody tip bad?

[Shannon]

They were a couple. Hold on, hold on.

[Naim Ali]

Well, all these people make so much money, though.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah.

[Naim Ali]

Like, everybody on this list makes so much money.

[Zach Amico]

I mean, that's what I would do if I had a.

[Naim Ali]

It's nothing to you. You're a millionaire. It's nothing for you to leave. Here you go, take a thousand.

[Zach Amico]

That's like ten dollars for us.

[Naim Ali]

Yes. Yeah, one thousand. Take a thousand.

[Zach Amico]

I wish I had a lot of money to do shit like that. That'd just be a fun thing to do.

[Naim Ali]

Yes.

[Shannon]

I mean, this one, you know, it's just like the least of all the great ones. It says Zendaya and Tom Holland paid for the people behind them at Starbucks. This is just the least of the great ones.

[Zia Anderson]

That's gay.

[Shannon]

Jessica Simpson left me 50, 55, 0% on her lunch bill and signed a birthday card for my best friend.

[Zia Anderson]

That's fine.

[Naim Ali]

Yeah.

[Shannon]

Okay, hold on. I know it. All right, so the one that's obvious that I remember seeing from the end is a Diddy. And it just says worst was Diddy.

[Naim Ali]

Really?

[Shannon]

But not. Not what he gave City Girls.

[Zia Anderson]

Oh, the. Oh, I love. I love that song. City Girl. They.

[Zach Amico]

No clue.

[Shannon]

It says they're awful and they left $30 on a 300 bill.

[Naim Ali]

I could believe that. They. They seem like very rude ladies.

[Zia Anderson]

They seem very unaccustomed, for sure.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah.

[Naim Ali]

And. And they were like, before they were rappers, they were scammers. Like, yeah. When they first. When they first got popular, the one girl in the group was in prison for scamming. So she couldn't even like go around and tour with them because she was in prison. Okay, so people like that, you're not going to tip good if you a scammer, you taking money from people.

[Zach Amico]

But you know what though? Worst tipping story. I don't know why I didn't think of this. Not even. This is just a worst story in general. The frickin Dixie Chicks.

[Zia Anderson]

Really, really?

[Zach Amico]

Fuck the Dixie Chicks.

[Naim Ali]

And they made so much money too.

[Zach Amico]

They made so much money. They came in once, this place I was working at, and it wasn't even my table to start with. I came in and took over because the girl before me was leaving her shift and they were waiting a long time for their food. Now the place that I worked at was a really busy. It was like a two and a half hour wait. It was a brunch place in la, which is, you know, brunch is insane there. It was like a two and a half hour wait. They came in, they were waiting a long time for their food because food was just taking a long time. And there's like. I just came into it. I didn't put their order in, nothing. And I kept checking in with the kitchen. I told the manager, like, there's not really anything I can do at that point.

[Naim Ali]

I'm just like, you're not cooking it?

[Zach Amico]

Yeah, like I'm not cooking the food. It was taking while they started to get really pissed off. They started to get really like. So they made their food to go because they had to go. And they just gave them their food to go and said, we took your food off of the bill. And I dropped the check with just their drinks. They not only stiffed me completely, didn't tip, they didn't pay for the drinks and I had to pay for them. They just got up, took their food and walked out.

[Zia Anderson]

Oh, that's soft.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah.

[Naim Ali]

What the do they want you to do?

[Zia Anderson]

I don't know.

[Zach Amico]

I was like, I had to get the manager involved too. I was like, there's nothing I can do at this point. I checked in with the kitchen. Food's just taking a while. Like I don't know.

[Zia Anderson]

Well, I'm gonna remember that now if we take anything away from this episode.

[Naim Ali]

Yeah, fuck the Dixie Chicks.

[Zia Anderson]

Even though Goodbye Earl is a great.

[Zach Amico]

Song, I don't know any of their music.

[Zia Anderson]

Goodbye Earl is excellent.

[Zach Amico]

Okay.

[Zia Anderson]

Very, very good song, however inappropriate. And that's what we learned today. We're gonna call it there. Thank you so much. Tuning in. If you do one thing for me, guys, today it is to check out True Dat, Premiering on the 6th July of here on Gas Digital. Support. These guys, I love them dearly and I think you're going to love their show. I would love to talk true crime with you guys sometime. Of course, I am a serial killer aficionado, so I am ready whenever you have a subject and I can't wait to see what you guys do with the show. I love you very much and we'll catch you this Friday on our exclusive episode here on Gas Digital dot com. Bye.

[Naim Ali]

The fun's begun. No sleeping in. Noon is morning time to him Papa Baco chugging it down just like the favorite ob and join the crew. It's a Miko morning too. It's a Miko morning.