0023. Dru Montana and Damien Speranza

Summary

Zac Amico's Morning Zoo - Episode 0023: Drew Montana and Damien Speranza
Release Date: July 4, 2025
Host: GaS Digital Network

---

Guests Introduction

Duration: 00:50 - 02:35

In this episode, host Zac Amico welcomes two comedians from the "Durag and the Deer Tag" community: Drew Montana and Damien Speranza. The trio exchanges greetings and briefly discusses their recent activities, rejoining the road after a hiatus.

Notable Quote:
Zac Amico [01:57]: "Happy Monday, everybody. It's your other boy, the international superstar, Zach Amico."

---

Cats and Their Quirks

Duration: 02:35 - 12:42

The conversation shifts to the mysterious and often frustrating behaviors of cats. Damien shares anecdotes about his own cat, highlighting the challenges and amusing moments pet owners face. Topics include deciphering cat meows using AI tools, the independent nature of cats, and specific mischievous behaviors like stealing glasses and causing household chaos.

Notable Quotes:
Damien Speranza [07:00]: "My cat figured out what the suitcase means. So if he sees the suitcase packed, he knows somebody's leaving and he's pissed."

Drew Montana [10:27]: "He's got a little tent that we got him. And one day he had my knife. Like a tactical knife."

---

Ice Cream Truck Treats Nostalgia

Duration: 15:54 - 38:06

The trio reminisces about favorite 90s ice cream truck treats, critiquing and celebrating various nostalgic flavors and designs. They discuss specific treats like the Flintstone Push Pop, Colonel Crunch Strawberry, Super Mario bar, and others, sharing personal preferences and memories associated with each.

Notable Quotes:
Damien Speranza [28:35]: "The Flintstone Pop should be classic. That should be top three."

Drew Montana [36:08]: "The Spice Girls lollipop was so goddamn good."

---

AI-Created Comedian: The Mystery of Roy J.

Duration: 48:00 - 66:37

A significant portion of the episode delves into the intriguing topic of Roy J., a comedian rumored to be an AI creation. The group explores theories suggesting that Roy J. is not a real person but rather an AI-generated persona designed to produce nonsensical humor. They analyze his peculiar jokes, catchphrases like "Slither" and "Spook," and the unorthodox aspects of his performances that fuel these speculations.

Notable Quotes:
Damien Speranza [57:09]: "It feels like AI trying to... I could get the idea that people think it's not a real person."

Drew Montana [59:25]: "I've never seen or heard of this guy, but also that wasn't my heyday."

---

True Crime Discussion: Gypsy Rose Blanchard

Duration: 66:37 - 72:00

The episode concludes with a discussion about Gypsy Rose Blanchard, focusing on her life post-incarceration. The hosts express skepticism about her claims of innocence in the murder of her mother, suggesting that she might still hold culpability. They also touch upon her participation in activities like karaoke, contrasting her notorious past with her current endeavors.

Notable Quotes:
Damien Speranza [67:13]: "Gypsy Rose Blanchard... she has forgiven herself and should not be blamed for her completely mentally devoid of emotion, boyfriend slaughtering her mother."

Drew Montana [71:42]: "Yeah. She's up there in boob heaven."

---

Conclusion and Closing Remarks

Duration: 72:00 - End

Damien wraps up the episode by encouraging listeners to support the guests and colleagues, thanking Shannon and Harrington for filling in the booth. He hints at upcoming episodes and promotions, maintaining the show's signature chaotic and humorous tone.

Notable Quote:
Damien Speranza [71:43]: "We are the perfect criminals. 11-year-old girls, if you need to plan a murder, come to us."

---

Key Takeaways

• Pet Insights: The hosts shared humorous and relatable stories about cat ownership, emphasizing the unpredictable nature of cats.

• Nostalgic Flavors: A nostalgic trip through 90s ice cream treats sparked lively discussions and personal anecdotes.

• AI and Comedy: The mysterious figure of Roy J. raised questions about the intersection of AI and creative professions, highlighting the potential for AI-generated personalities.

• True Crime Reflections: Conversations around Gypsy Rose Blanchard provided a deep dive into controversial true crime narratives, blending skepticism with dark humor.

---

For those who haven't tuned in, this episode offers a blend of humor, nostalgia, and intriguing discussions on AI and true crime, all wrapped in the unhinged charm of Zac Amico's Morning Zoo.

Transcript

[Zach Amico]

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[Shannon]

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[Shannon]

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[Damien Speranza]

Get started with Mochi Health today.

[Zach Amico]

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[Shannon]

First month of membership.

[Zach Amico]

That's join M-H-I.com with promo code AUDIO40.

[Drew Montana]

Fill her up.

[Damien Speranza]

You're listening to the Gas Digital Network. Wake up, it's time to go. Zach Amico's got a show. Animals are here to play Jokes are guests to start your day Tell the sandman no more sleep Eat some eggs and cook some beef Map is waiting. Don't be shy Stretch your legs and touch the sky Grab a coffee and join the crew It's Akamiko. Morning. Happy Monday, everybody. It's your other boy, the international superstar, Zach Amico. And this is another heralded edition of Zack Amico's Morning Zoo. Across the table from me, I have two very funny gentlemen from Durag and the deer tag. It is our good buddy, Drew Montana.

[Drew Montana]

Thank you for having me, Zach. Always a pleasure to see.

[Damien Speranza]

How you doing, buddy?

[Drew Montana]

I'm good, man.

[Damien Speranza]

The recent recently recarred.

[Drew Montana]

Yes. Re.

[Damien Speranza]

Back on the road.

[Drew Montana]

Back on the road. It's. It's good, man. It feels good. I. For months I was driving, well, nothing. And then before that I was in a jeep. And now I'm back in a little car. So it feels good to be tight to the road moving fast.

[Damien Speranza]

Well, thank you very much for being here. And next to him, our good friend, I believe his morning Zoo debut was but friend for a very long time. Of the real Ass podcast and the Lewis and Zach show, it's Damien Speranza. How you doing, buddy?

[Unknown]

What's going on, man? Thanks for having me.

[Damien Speranza]

Thank you so much for being here. I truly appreciate it.

[Unknown]

I love the little intro song and everything.

[Damien Speranza]

Thank you. I've been getting a lot of tweets that people's kids sing it. Oh, yeah, because they have it in the car.

[Unknown]

It's like that or Pink Pony Club.

[Damien Speranza]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Unknown]

That sucks.

[Damien Speranza]

It's a hit with the kids, I gotta tell you. Well, thank you guys for being here. Let's Knock plugs right out of the way, Harrington. I know you might not. If you have the plug music, that would be great. If not, we could put it in post. I know you're covering for Young Jorge. Oh, awesome. Thank you, Damian. What do you have people to check out?

[Unknown]

You can go to my website, damiensperranza.com gonna be Dallas, Texas this Thursday. Gilbert, Arizona. I got some other tour dates coming up, so just check it out. If you're in the area and I'm coming through, get some tickets.

[Damien Speranza]

Fantastic.

[Drew Montana]

Mr. Montana doing Souljols July 12th. If anybody's in the Pottstown area, come out. And Columbus, Ohio, July 25. There's more than enough tickets available for that one. Chicago, Denver, Louisiana. All fun things coming up. So yeah, just check it out. And do Rag and the deer tag.

[Damien Speranza]

And Digital Bazooka podcast sounds absolutely great. Enjoy yourself. And if you're in the Denver area, highly recommend checking out. It's a bar and a movie theater called Gnarly's.

[Drew Montana]

Okay.

[Damien Speranza]

And it is all. The guy has a vintage toy store and the whole bar is 90s toys. I like that really cool club too. Yeah, yeah, I did. I did it. How was that? It was really fun. It's a black box theater. It's connected to the bar. It's awesome.

[Unknown]

Nice.

[Damien Speranza]

Shout out Gnarly's. And hey, if you want to see me, you can follow me on Instagram. And Zach is not funny. You can see all my dates at punch up.live/zach Amico. I have a tour of the south coming up. I have another one coming up in September. I also have some Juggalo championship wrestling dates. We're doing a pay per view in Detroit on the 17th. And then I am in East Rutherford, New Jersey at midnight, SummerSlam Weekend doing a co show, JCW and Game Changer Wrestling. And I'll be at the gathering of the Juggalos in August. If you love the show and I know you do, head on over to gas digital.com today. Use that promo code ZOO Z O O and what does that get you? Gets you a little bit of money off a month from your subscription. It gets your episodes early ad free and uncensored. It gets you access to the archives, thousands of episodes of all your favorite podcasts from over the years here on Gas Digital. And it gets you into the live chat where you can communicate with all the other maniacs who watch all the shows here on this network. All right, boys, we got some dumb weird shit to talk about. We found a bunch of weird ones today. So I am very excited just to catch you up. Damian. The. The theme of the show is I kind of wanted to be like a morning zoo where we do silly news and keep it light, but then everything always turns to weird. So we're gonna start with. We'll start with this. What is your cat trying to say? AI tool claims to decipher cat's meows in real time with, I believe, 85 accuracy. Shannon, give us some info on it.

[Shannon]

So sorry.

[Damien Speranza]

Excuse me.

[Unknown]

Yeah, what's happening right now?

[Shannon]

So there we go. For several years, they've been archiving all sorts of animal sounds. Meows, purrs, trills, growls. And they're, like, making, like, an image of the sound and then comparing them to each other. And now they believe that with this app, the meow talk app, that they have 90% accuracy with translating meows and what they mean. And it's basically into, like, is it hungry? Is it angry? Does it miss you?

[Damien Speranza]

Like, so essentially, it's the machine. Herb Simpson invented the Simpsons to decipher what Maggie was saying.

[Unknown]

Right.

[Damien Speranza]

If you played by Danny DeVito.

[Drew Montana]

I remember.

[Unknown]

Yeah.

[Damien Speranza]

Do we have any video or anything?

[Shannon]

I know I don't, and I actually. I wish I would have just looked at this a little more so I could have tried it at home first. But I do feel like cat owners, though, know what their cat sounds mean.

[Damien Speranza]

Yeah. More or less. I feel like you get an idea.

[Unknown]

I'm not a cat person. I feel like I'm in the minority here, so I'm gonna try to be nice.

[Damien Speranza]

You are the minority here.

[Unknown]

Well, yeah. Double up. Double up.

[Damien Speranza]

Yeah.

[Drew Montana]

Never had a cat, but I think they. If as an adult, I've never had one, like, growing up, we had them. I feel like they would only say, like, one or two things. You know what I mean?

[Damien Speranza]

I feel like they have. Mine has a few different ones. Mine has a play with me now.

[Drew Montana]

Yeah.

[Damien Speranza]

I usually. It's more by the look in his face.

[Drew Montana]

He's got a.

[Damien Speranza]

If it's the food. He wants me to. If it's the food, it's more of, like, he's leading me towards where the food is. If it's play, usually there's a toy and he's, like, dead set in front of me.

[Drew Montana]

Yeah.

[Unknown]

Every cat I've ever met has just been an asshole.

[Damien Speranza]

Yeah.

[Unknown]

Yeah.

[Damien Speranza]

That's part of it. Like, the whole.

[Unknown]

Like that. It says, I miss you. I don't. It doesn't strike me as they miss it. I mean, again, I know it's More.

[Damien Speranza]

They'Re mad at you for being gone.

[Unknown]

Yeah. So it's a. It's a cunty.

[Damien Speranza]

I mean, so. Yeah, of course. No, you got nuts. So my thing recently, my cat figured out what the suitcase means. So if he. He. If he sees the suitcase packed, he knows somebody's leaving and he's pissed.

[Unknown]

Is, you know, in a suitcase.

[Damien Speranza]

No, but you got a lot. My roommates. Old cat pissed in my suitcase years ago and I did not know till I landed in Europe and I opened up. It was bad.

[Unknown]

Yeah. Imagine. That was a positive.

[Damien Speranza]

Boy, was I steamed on that one.

[Drew Montana]

Yeah, I always. I always figured they were more independent creatures. Like they would just be cool with you leaving.

[Damien Speranza]

And now some of them are. Oh, they. What do they call Shannon? What's the term for the pendant? No, it's like magnet cat or something. You know what I'm talking about, Shannon, I.

[Shannon]

No, I gotta look it up.

[Damien Speranza]

There's. There's a term for certain kinds of cats that are very codependent. And mine is like. But it's funny because he knows certain things I'm not gonna like. I ain't getting up and feeding them.

[Unknown]

So funny. Those research, they're gonna find out one day that the codependent cats are the retarded ones.

[Damien Speranza]

Well, he's armed. Orange cats are a different thing.

[Shannon]

Velcro cat.

[Damien Speranza]

Thank you, Velcro cat. Orange cats, like, there's like a different coding with them. Like mo at something. Like almost all of them are male.

[Unknown]

Really?

[Damien Speranza]

And. Yeah, and they have like a very. You either get a very loving, smart cat or a psychopath. The orange ones, they say that about.

[Unknown]

Kids with red hair. Like, I have a son that's. My son is red hair. And they said about kids with red hair have a whole different level of energy. They're just psychotic. And it's not far off. So I kind of believe.

[Damien Speranza]

Yeah, I think it's all like those recessive genes. Yeah.

[Unknown]

Yeah.

[Damien Speranza]

It's insane, but yeah. So like, my cat will wake up my wife all the time for like around 5am he's looking for food, right? He will not even try me because he knows not happen. But he little fucker, he figured out that if he makes us have to get up, food will happen. So his thing is he will steal our glasses.

[Unknown]

Like the one you're on your face, not the cup. Like. Yeah, take a cup off the shelf.

[Damien Speranza]

Like we have. We can't put our glasses on the nightstand.

[Unknown]

That's hilarious.

[Damien Speranza]

We have to put them in a case in the drawer. That is because he will take them in his mouth and bolt.

[Unknown]

Yeah.

[Damien Speranza]

And then you don't have glasses.

[Unknown]

Cats are assholes.

[Damien Speranza]

So now you're blindly feeling your way through the house.

[Unknown]

That's amazing.

[Damien Speranza]

Dude, he stole. He has a little tent that we got him. And one day he had my knife. Like a tactical knife.

[Unknown]

Your cat Puerto Rican?

[Damien Speranza]

Could be. We. No, he's from. He's from Staten Island. He's Italian. He had a knife, my wife's Wellbutrin and her cell phone all hidden in his tent.

[Unknown]

That's hilarious.

[Damien Speranza]

I think it's just things he sees us use all the time.

[Unknown]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Damien Speranza]

And he's like, I'll take that maniac. I know it seems like a plan.

[Drew Montana]

Yeah.

[Damien Speranza]

It seemed like an escape hatch.

[Unknown]

I also like that the knife is something he sees use all the time.

[Damien Speranza]

Oh, yes.

[Drew Montana]

It's like.

[Unknown]

Yeah, the tactical knife.

[Drew Montana]

Knife the four dad loves.

[Damien Speranza]

Yeah, yeah. No, he sees me open packages. Like, I have. It's something that I use all the time.

[Unknown]

I know a lot of city people are cat people. Are you cat people because it's just easier in apartments, or were you always a cat person?

[Damien Speranza]

No, I was not a cat person at all until I moved to an apartment.

[Unknown]

Yeah. What about you, Shannon? Because you have cats, too, don't you?

[Shannon]

I do, yes. I'm an animal person. I like both.

[Unknown]

But you're a good person.

[Shannon]

But also, I just, like. I don't have the time to, like.

[Damien Speranza]

You know, dedicated dogs are needy. Yeah. If I. If I would love to. If I had a backyard. I always feel so bad for, like, New York dogs. Like, you gotta take them to the park every day.

[Drew Montana]

No, that's why I don't want one in Philly, because it's like. And even if I did take it to the dog park, it's fucking dirty. There's, like, no fresh grass. There's needles. There's homeless guys sleeping. Like, I grew up in the middle of nowhere, so it was easy for us to have as many pets. But. Yeah, I just always felt bad having a pet in the city, even with cats. Because my cats were always outdoor cats. Like, we would just leave a box in the garage with, like, blankets and shit. Then they would kind of. They would hunt for themselves. We would feed them. But most of the time they had, like, mice and shit that they would eat.

[Damien Speranza]

Yeah.

[Drew Montana]

Or I guess kill. I don't know if they really eat them.

[Damien Speranza]

Not mine. My. I've never had a mouse problem.

[Drew Montana]

Yeah, dude, they fuck them up.

[Damien Speranza]

They fuck them. They mine. My Cat. Now even the cat toy, like the little mice toys, right? He got some practice. He splits the belly down and takes the stuffing out. He did that to my operation. He did that to my. I had a taxidermied bat that I bought my wife. It was a bat, right? In a. Like a coffin. Well, it was a heart shaped coffin.

[Unknown]

Yep.

[Damien Speranza]

And I, you know, hey, little gothic, gothic love, right? And every day I would see him look at it like, I'm gonna get you one day, son of a bitch. And then one day we came home and he had knocked it off the wall and he ate the face off of it and gutted it.

[Drew Montana]

Holy shit.

[Damien Speranza]

Shannon, actually. Do you know my cat actually went nuts on the TV yesterday? Because Shannon, you know who started making videos again? Uh. Oh, no, no, this isn't bad.

[Drew Montana]

August Ames.

[Damien Speranza]

Do you remember the old man that fed the raccoons hot dogs?

[Shannon]

Yes, yes.

[Damien Speranza]

Shannon, could you. He has. So there's.

[Drew Montana]

I know.

[Unknown]

I'm unaware. I'm not.

[Damien Speranza]

This is one of my YouTube deep dives.

[Unknown]

Oh, shit.

[Damien Speranza]

Okay. It's not in any way bad. It's just a sweet old man whose wife passed away and she used to feed raccoons. So he took it over. So he just feed. It's just an old man politely giving raccoon. Yeah, there he is.

[Drew Montana]

Yeah, dude, this is my boy.

[Damien Speranza]

And then he just. Now he has, like a big thing of cat food that they usually eat. And then the hot dogs are a treat.

[Unknown]

This is such a sweet video, but I'm not.

[Drew Montana]

No matter how raccoons have no idea how gay this is.

[Damien Speranza]

No swallowing dogs. That's wild. Dude, there's black raccoons in the back. Oh, hell no. You ain't never going to see me eat that on video, son.

[Drew Montana]

The possums in the back, like, for everybody.

[Damien Speranza]

Oh, dude, I love their little hands. Oh, thank you.

[Unknown]

That's how I feel about midgets. Dude.

[Drew Montana]

We had a pet raccoon for a couple. I'd say maybe two. Two months. Two, three months. Not like in the house, but we. We'd keep it in my neighbor's garage. And my next door neighbor was like my best friend growing up. We were the same age. And, dude, my cat actually killed his cat. Different story, but in that same garage. But one day we were just upstairs smoking in the garage and there was a raccoon up there. And, like, at first we were like, we got to get this thing the fuck out of here. But then we were like, let's just start feeding it. And then we Would blow smoke at it. He was the man. He would chill. And then he escaped one day, but he was up there for, like, two months.

[Unknown]

These are a lot of Caucasian stories you guys are sharing right now.

[Damien Speranza]

I want to know about the cat murder.

[Drew Montana]

Dude, this was fucked up. So we were upstairs, same room, smoking weed, and we just heard like. Like the classic, hey, Arnold. Sound effect of, like.

[Damien Speranza]

Yeah, yeah.

[Drew Montana]

And so we, like, went downstairs, like, 10 minutes later, and his cat was just laying there dead. And we were like, holy shit. Like, what the fuck happened? And then I went home, like, walked back to my house, and my cat was walking out of my garage just covered in blood.

[Damien Speranza]

Oh, no.

[Drew Montana]

Yeah. And then I called him on the phone. I was like, dude, I think my cat killed your cat. And he was like, what do you mean? I was like, you gotta come see.

[Damien Speranza]

This man that's just strutting around, letting.

[Unknown]

Blood drip off his face.

[Damien Speranza]

Dude. They're brutal. If you get. Dude, right? If my cat will put on, like, birds on tv. If he hears a bird on tv, he's, like, looking behind the TV to go kill a bird.

[Unknown]

Jesus Christ.

[Damien Speranza]

Yeah, he's dumb as fuck, but, man, he's. He's ready to kill.

[Unknown]

You're not selling me on cats. I just want to point that out.

[Drew Montana]

I don't love them. I'm a dog person, if anything, but I don't hate cats, I guess, but, yeah, I've seen 100 cat fights. Just like, not 100, but I've seen a bunch of cats fight. I've never seen one get violent to the point where one killed one.

[Damien Speranza]

So I have no idea what I've seen major wounds. My cat to this day has a big scar on his head from the last cat fucking bopping them a few to give him a few good bops.

[Drew Montana]

Do cats have arteries?

[Unknown]

I assume everything has arteries.

[Damien Speranza]

Have arteries in general.

[Drew Montana]

Yeah, he probably got him on the. On the sweet spot.

[Damien Speranza]

Yeah, he got. He's got a big fucking dental.

[Drew Montana]

Yeah, he.

[Damien Speranza]

He got him. Got him.

[Unknown]

That's the story Zach tells everybody.

[Damien Speranza]

Yep. All right, moving on channel. Can we just toy tonight? This girl with the baby arm?

[Shannon]

Yes, yes, go ahead.

[Damien Speranza]

Hey, guys. Today's episode is brought to you by our good friends at Yo Kratom, home of the 60 kilo. If you do create them, don't start it on my account. But if you already use it for some of its many benefits, there's only one place on earth to make that Purchase, and that's yo kratom.com. and why is that? Because they have the best strains, the best customer service, and they're the marquee sponsor of everything we do here at the network. Stop buying your kratom at bodegas, smoke shops, or gas stations. And you don't even know what's in there. You get a little bit. It's not worth it. When you go to yocratum.com and get a full kilo shipped right to your door for. For just 60 bucks. That's right. There's no promo code needed because it's already the best deal in the world of kratom. Yecratum.com Home of the $60 kilo. Let's get back into the program. All right, so this video was posted by Royce, our good friend from Night Wave and Day Wave, Right? Or what's it. Oh, Revenge of the Sith.

[Shannon]

Yes.

[Damien Speranza]

And we don't have an origin on it, but I did want to toy to. So toy tonight we judge whether or not she's a toy woman or a night woman.

[Drew Montana]

Of course.

[Damien Speranza]

And let's take a look.

[Unknown]

God damn it.

[Drew Montana]

I don't like how her arm hangs out. Where. Where it came from.

[Unknown]

Yeah, it's not the shoulder.

[Damien Speranza]

Well, at first you go, I think her tits out, and then she backs up.

[Unknown]

Okay. So I actually.

[Damien Speranza]

So, okay, let's judge. Let's forget the arms there. Forget it. So, yeah, like right there from that angle. Toy. She's beautiful.

[Drew Montana]

I. I think I love her, but I would just convince her to cut it off.

[Damien Speranza]

See, I kind of. She's built like a rabbit vibrator.

[Unknown]

Jesus Christ.

[Damien Speranza]

You know what I'm talking about? The one that has the attachment top and.

[Unknown]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's great.

[Damien Speranza]

And I feel like, you know, maybe it's like scary movie to the strong hand.

[Drew Montana]

Yeah.

[Damien Speranza]

But it doesn't look like it works.

[Unknown]

And like, you know when you're sitting.

[Damien Speranza]

Up and you're hitting it? Yeah, it's moving.

[Unknown]

I feel like the arm is going to move.

[Damien Speranza]

There we go. Yeah, yeah.

[Drew Montana]

Like the shocker.

[Unknown]

Actually, I. Actually, I hung out with a girl for a couple of months, but her arm ended at the elbow. But it came out of the shoulder.

[Damien Speranza]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Unknown]

And, like, she had, like, on the nub that was like, the hands started to develop.

[Damien Speranza]

Okay.

[Unknown]

So she could actually put a cigarette in there and, like, hold it on the nub. She was hot. But I think it's like he said, where it's coming out of, it's really just throwing.

[Damien Speranza]

Can we see again? One. One more time. Yeah, it is.

[Drew Montana]

It throws unexplainable. I don't mind an explainable injury.

[Unknown]

Like, it's resting on.

[Damien Speranza]

It looks like in the womb, she was like, pressed to the side, Right?

[Unknown]

Well, she asked.

[Damien Speranza]

I mean, she lost her whole shoulder.

[Unknown]

I guess that's. That's why. Right. Because there's no shoulder. It's just.

[Damien Speranza]

Yeah, that's the. I think the lack of shoulder is almost the shocking part.

[Unknown]

Right.

[Damien Speranza]

And then. Yes, the.

[Unknown]

It just doesn't. And it's also like, it's a gray. I don't know if it's the screen, but it almost looks like her hand is a little gray. Like there's not enough circulation to it. Yeah, that's also creepy.

[Drew Montana]

Yeah. Is that thing dead?

[Unknown]

That's what I'm saying.

[Damien Speranza]

I don't.

[Unknown]

I don't know.

[Damien Speranza]

And plus, growing up black, how many of her family members looked at that and was like, oh, you know what?

[Drew Montana]

We're going to fry that thing hard.

[Unknown]

Say the hinges might be ashy. That might be the great guy.

[Damien Speranza]

Well, she can't lotion it. I'm gonna go toit.

[Drew Montana]

Yeah, toit.

[Unknown]

For sure.

[Damien Speranza]

I think I can work around it.

[Drew Montana]

Yeah, for sure.

[Damien Speranza]

Yeah. I don't think it would. It would. It would. I think you. I. I bet after like a couple days, you forget about it.

[Unknown]

There's no way I'll ever forget about it.

[Damien Speranza]

There's just.

[Unknown]

No, I can't.

[Damien Speranza]

I mean, I would high five it when I can.

[Unknown]

Put it. You put it in the hand while she's sleeping. Yeah. See if she's faking it and while she's sleeping and grabs it.

[Damien Speranza]

Yeah, and that's. That might be a good ball nest hand if it works.

[Drew Montana]

Oh, true.

[Unknown]

While you're titty fucker. Because you have to get that close to get there.

[Drew Montana]

Well, that's the thing about, like, people with disabilities is they always figure out something to overcome. So there's got to be a trick she has.

[Damien Speranza]

I go on the road with this comic, J. Wall. Have you ever met him?

[Drew Montana]

I don't think.

[Damien Speranza]

Southern kid. So J. Wall has one arm and it's off at the, like around the elbow. And it was because his umbilical cord wrapped around it and it never grew.

[Unknown]

Oh, okay.

[Damien Speranza]

But I'll tell you this month, by the way, when the person who booked us together did not warn me and I did not Google him.

[Unknown]

That is jarring.

[Damien Speranza]

So Jwall comes and picks me up. We had like a seven hour drive to this gig. And. And God bless this man. He was on the phone drinking a monster and smoking cigs. The whole ride.

[Unknown]

1.

[Damien Speranza]

Driving. Driving with the nub.

[Unknown]

Wow. Which.

[Damien Speranza]

Whoa.

[Unknown]

Was it the left or right?

[Damien Speranza]

I think it's the left.

[Unknown]

Okay. So he could.

[Damien Speranza]

Yeah. And he would have. It was hard to get the cup holder. Yeah. And he had a monster. And then he was. He had a cigarette in the hand with the monster. And he was on the phone, like, with the. With his.

[Unknown]

And you let him drive like that?

[Damien Speranza]

I can't drive. We're safer with him.

[Unknown]

I don't know about that.

[Damien Speranza]

We're safer with him. I don't. I can't drive for shit.

[Unknown]

That's great. This wasn't stick shift.

[Damien Speranza]

But I'll tell you what. By. By day two, it was fucking fine.

[Drew Montana]

Yeah.

[Damien Speranza]

Yeah. You just fucking. My buddy. My buddy with one arm. Way less creepy than the opener who picked me up at a pet van and then parked it outside the hotel and slept in it.

[Unknown]

Yeah, that's creepy.

[Damien Speranza]

When I had a second bed.

[Unknown]

What is it? I don't know if that says more about them or you. You know, I mean, like, he didn't want to get in the hotel room with you. He's like, I'll stay in the van.

[Drew Montana]

I'll stay in the van.

[Damien Speranza]

It was like. It was like. It reminded me of the van from Dumb and Dumber.

[Unknown]

Oh, yeah. With the.

[Damien Speranza]

Yeah, it would have, like, dogs and cats all over, but he lived in it. And he just fucking literally dropped me off. I'm like, where you sleep? But then he's like, here in the parking lot. I'm like, I have a bed. He's like, hey, I got all my stuff in here.

[Drew Montana]

Do you. Do you ever feel like you're on, like, a high horse when you're hanging out with a friend with a disability? You know what I mean?

[Damien Speranza]

Look at me.

[Drew Montana]

I get that. Fair, dude. I walk around with my blind friend, my friend Shannon, and he is the man. We'd be boys if he wasn't blind. But he's. He's a cool guy to walk around with. Just because I think people look at me like, yo, I'm helping this guy.

[Damien Speranza]

I've taken advantage of Blind Mike.

[Drew Montana]

Yeah.

[Damien Speranza]

I've taken Blind Mike to the Go Go bar.

[Drew Montana]

Is. I don't think Blind Mike's fully take.

[Damien Speranza]

Advantage, though, because every girl that would come up, I would be like, oh, my friend's blind. And then they would.

[Unknown]

He would read Braille.

[Damien Speranza]

They were. They. I think they took it as a challenge because I was just feeding him singles under the table. I was giving him all my body.

[Unknown]

You were his atm.

[Damien Speranza]

Yeah, I was just giving him cash because I poor kid was having the time of his life.

[Drew Montana]

Did. Did Blind Mike. I was hoping to see him here today. I feel like I have a beef to pick with him, but I don't know if it's him, somebody at Skank Fest or Gas Digital. Whoever wrote the bios for Skank Fest. It is the funniest thing I've ever seen. Have you seen these?

[Damien Speranza]

No. I don't know.

[Drew Montana]

Dude, look up. The bios for Skankfest and whatever you sent them got completely rearranged.

[Unknown]

They.

[Drew Montana]

They somehow called me fuck. What was it? Mine says, like he calls himself Philly's dirtiest forest fairy. I'm like, I never wrote that in my life. I feel like Blind Mike had to write these. This is crazy.

[Damien Speranza]

Drew Montana, the wigger of the woods, baby. Philly's dirtiest forest fairy. Co host of Durag and the deer tag and voice behind Prank Call. Classic digital Bazooka. He riff quick, weird and loud like if Moonshine learned to talk. He's also the reigning champ of the 2024 Pro Frog polls. And yeah, that means exactly what you think it does. King of the lily pad. Gross. I hate it.

[Drew Montana]

They said some very nice things, but yeah, Philly's dirtiest forest fairy.

[Damien Speranza]

Yeah.

[Drew Montana]

Quick witted razor shark, whatever that was. I was like, I didn't write any of this.

[Damien Speranza]

Yeah, I hate every part of that.

[Drew Montana]

Dude, we all got one.

[Damien Speranza]

I only.

[Drew Montana]

Every comic has a. Oh, no.

[Damien Speranza]

Oh, you know what? Can I ask? Is this supposed to be a Corey.

[Unknown]

Little Gumbo for her?

[Damien Speranza]

Is this supposed to be read in a Cajun accent?

[Drew Montana]

I think so. Dude, Naim was reading these.

[Damien Speranza]

Okay? That's what it might. It's supposed to be going out there. It's supposed to be like the Acadian man.

[Drew Montana]

Naim's reading these yesterday. He goes, what a fucking slave. Write these?

[Damien Speranza]

Kind of. We call them interns and producers. Zach amigo, he a gore at Little Gumbo. Oh, horror Hilarity hog haw Hawk, Hannah from Dirty but slithering through Brooklyn like a demon. In Doc Martin he lit up Comedy Central. Impractical joker and serious exam. But this ain't no clean cut comic. Zach. Rouge run deep within cult film royalty. That trauma scribbling on flicks. I hate it. I hate every part of it.

[Drew Montana]

Dude, reading it like that. It does sound a lot better. Maybe I missed.

[Damien Speranza]

Once. And he was so sweet about it when I. Because I wanted to put him on trial. But then he was so sweet about it and felt Bad that I took my anger back.

[Drew Montana]

Yeah.

[Damien Speranza]

So I can get your opinion?

[Drew Montana]

No, I was.

[Damien Speranza]

So one night we're hanging out and I send him out to go get beer for everybody. And I give him a 50.

[Unknown]

Okay.

[Damien Speranza]

And he gets, I think like four beers. And then I go, I'll get yourself something to. And he gets like four tall boys and then doesn't have change. Or he gives me a 10 or something, right. And I'm like, that's wild. How much are beers at this deli?

[Unknown]

Right?

[Damien Speranza]

And then he had put my receipt in the bag. He bought a $20 vape.

[Unknown]

Oh, with your money. You said get yourself.

[Damien Speranza]

I said, get yourself something. And he bought a 20 elf bar vape.

[Unknown]

Yeah, I'd be pissed. I mean.

[Damien Speranza]

And I didn't put it together.

[Unknown]

That's so funny though. So what was it? What you said he was nice about what was his.

[Damien Speranza]

So I called Faga because he was still here. And I'm like. I was like, is Blind Mike still there? Get that motherfucker on the phone. And I said, well, I said that means another beer or a sandwich, like, right? You buy yourself dinner like something. But like, yeah, yeah, to buy yourself a vape is crazy. And he's like, oh, I'm sorry. Yeah, I thought that was too much. I'll give you the money back. And I'm like, no, dude, keep it. You get this one. But that's fucking bonkers.

[Unknown]

On the plus side, maybe he just thought you were a very generous man and he was just allowing him to spend all of this money.

[Damien Speranza]

Yeah, I think he really, really, in his head didn't put it together. Byron, who worked here, who. You would give him money and he just wouldn't give you change. And you'd be like, I get my change. Like, oh, I'm sorry. I thought that was like running around. Money delivery tip. Yeah, that was. He wanted. Yeah, that's hilarious. I think he took a fifty from Lewis for like a ten dollar thing.

[Unknown]

And then just kept the other.

[Damien Speranza]

He kept the. Kept the 40.

[Drew Montana]

That's crazy.

[Unknown]

That's brave too, because I get.

[Drew Montana]

I guess it's better to ask for. For forgiveness than permission.

[Damien Speranza]

Yeah, he gets the one that played.

[Unknown]

Dumb and then hope to get away with it.

[Drew Montana]

I didn't know I could buy a vape with half your money.

[Unknown]

Yeah, I thought only fans wasn't gonna piss you off. I'm sorry.

[Damien Speranza]

All right, so here's a fun one. I saw a list yesterday on instagram from Only90s Kids listing the best 90s ice cream truck Treats. I thought it'd be fun if we went through it. And. And Shannon Harrington, I would love your opinion on all these two, because I feel like they nailed it on half the list.

[Unknown]

Okay.

[Damien Speranza]

And half the list, I'd say, is a little garbage.

[Unknown]

Okay.

[Damien Speranza]

So let's check it out. Shannon, cutting to you.

[Shannon]

Okay. First one is the Street Sharks with the bubble gum eyes.

[Damien Speranza]

I remember. So I'm going to put this in the same category. Any cartoon one, I would say. Sonic Ninja Turtles, SpongeBob.

[Unknown]

It was the bubble gum eyes. Once you added that to any face, that was a great.

[Damien Speranza]

However most. Because those things would get transported so much that they would melt and refreeze. And so usually they would have, like, a sloth or Toxic Avenger eye. So, like, one eye would be, like, in their mouth.

[Unknown]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. But you still got the gumball.

[Damien Speranza]

Yeah. You got two gumballs.

[Unknown]

Yeah. Traumatized from the picture.

[Damien Speranza]

Yes. So I say, let's see.

[Unknown]

Number nine.

[Shannon]

Okay. Number nine is put the Flintstone push up.

[Damien Speranza]

That should be classic. That should be nominal.

[Unknown]

All Push Pops made me happy. All of them.

[Damien Speranza]

The. The. A very youth. Unique orange taste.

[Drew Montana]

Yes. Yeah. One I haven't found in years. That should be top three.

[Damien Speranza]

I agree. And yeah.

[Unknown]

And I don't want to speak too soon and say that until I see what else on the list.

[Damien Speranza]

And I will say the design of it keeps you from getting all over your hands. It did.

[Unknown]

It was perfect. It was very cool.

[Drew Montana]

You could. You could. It was good cardboard.

[Damien Speranza]

Yep. Yeah. By the way, that was the most white. It was the good cardboard. You are garbage. All right, keep it moving.

[Shannon]

Next one is the great white. I actually don't remember this.

[Damien Speranza]

I don't remember these either. I talked to my wife yesterday. She said they tasted like lemon Italian ice cream then. I don't like. But I have. No, I love lemon Italian ice. But I don't remember. I just don't remember that. That might have been regional.

[Unknown]

Yeah. Maybe I wasn't a fan.

[Shannon]

Next is the snow cone.

[Damien Speranza]

Garbage.

[Shannon]

Boring.

[Unknown]

Terrible circus.

[Damien Speranza]

Absolute terrible treat.

[Drew Montana]

Boardwalk.

[Damien Speranza]

Those aren't that good. And then the real ones, even. I feel like you run out of the syrup very fast. Fast. And now you're just eating shaved ice like an.

[Unknown]

Yeah, but you just came out of surgery.

[Damien Speranza]

Yeah. Terrible treat. Terrible treat. Moving on.

[Shannon]

Super Mario bar now.

[Damien Speranza]

Great. Because this is the lemon ice plus the gumball.

[Unknown]

Yeah. And it's Mario. I mean, in the 90s, it was.

[Damien Speranza]

This is a everything. I would say, very well placed as well. Drew.

[Drew Montana]

It was a hit. I Don't know. I got to see the rest of the list. Wait. I'm waiting for some of my favorites still.

[Damien Speranza]

I mean, I. I mean, I think the Ninja Turtle one or Sonic goes up top.

[Drew Montana]

It's got to be.

[Unknown]

Sonic is still a killer.

[Damien Speranza]

I got the sense when you said.

[Drew Montana]

All cartoons that they were going to lump them in. I'm glad Mario made the. Made the cup. I agree. All right. Yeah, it's fair. I was never. I didn't love the gumball. It might be a hot take, but something about ice cream and gum never went together for me.

[Damien Speranza]

Sometimes the gumball would have a weird texture after you had cold teeth.

[Drew Montana]

Yeah, dude, that was always the problem. I think that's why my teeth and my teeth are so chipped, because I would eat the cold gumball immediately.

[Unknown]

I'd save it. Yeah, save it. Let it thaw it out a little bit.

[Damien Speranza]

Keep it in his pocket.

[Unknown]

Yeah. Here you go.

[Drew Montana]

I used to take that as a challenge, like biting down on, like, hard gumballs or like, jawbreakers. Yeah. Remember the fireballs? The atomic fireballs? I used to be like, I could eat this in one bite and break half my mouth.

[Damien Speranza]

All right, keep it moving, Shannon.

[Shannon]

Next one is Colonel Crunch. Strawberry.

[Damien Speranza]

No. Okay. I don't remember them ever being called Colonel Crunch. I just. They were called Strawberry Shortcake, and I never liked. And that's a girl treat.

[Drew Montana]

Yeah, I didn't like those.

[Damien Speranza]

Shannon, your thoughts?

[Shannon]

I like the chocolate eclair one.

[Damien Speranza]

Okay. But I just. I feel like that's a girl tree. I feel like as a man, you cannot get the strawberry shortcake. No, not as a kid. You're just asking for it.

[Unknown]

Yeah, you're going to make fun of.

[Damien Speranza]

As a man, yes. But as a boy, no Strawberry, that's not. That's a. That's a girl treat.

[Drew Montana]

You buy that and as a man.

[Unknown]

I'm still going to make fun of you for.

[Damien Speranza]

Yes, of course. As I. As you should Keep it going. Hey, guys. Today's episode is brought to you by Small batch Cigar. Simple, fast, small batch. Hey, if you want to have people over just the same as. It's nice to have some fine Italian cheeses, some bottles of wine, some nice beers. Well, you should have cigars, too, if that's your thing. And smallbatchcigar.com is your spot, they've got free shipping on every order, with almost every order arriving in two to three days within the continental United States. They come with the Boveda pack included with every purchase, making it the most thorough packaging in the Industry. They have an amazing selection of rare, limited, and hard to find cigars. And you earn 5% rewards points instantly. So go to smallbatch cigar.com today. And what most people do is they click the new button to shop around their newest arrivals. And we have a code for you. Gas 10. That's G A S 10 gets you 10% off your order, plus those 5% rewards points. So that's small batch cigar.com promo code, gas 10. Give it a. Give it a little checkout and let us know what you think. Let's get back into the show.

[Shannon]

Next one, Mickey's Parade.

[Unknown]

Yeah, those were fun.

[Damien Speranza]

Okay. I had so a different texture than every ice pop I ever remember. And for some reason, I feel like we're colder.

[Unknown]

Yes.

[Damien Speranza]

Than every other ice pop.

[Drew Montana]

They were in the same freezer as Walt Disney's head.

[Unknown]

Yes.

[Damien Speranza]

But I vividly remember the way those would kind of like scrape off on your teeth.

[Unknown]

Yep.

[Damien Speranza]

The same way. Because we just look at street sharks. I feel like I can always remember the way a street shark toy smelled because they had like a rubber smell to them.

[Unknown]

Yeah.

[Damien Speranza]

And then they also had the hand puppet street sharks, and they were like the same kind of rubber. But I feel like the street sharks had a different smell than every other toy.

[Drew Montana]

I just tried to re watch street Sharks. This is what not having a job does to you. I tried to rewatch street sharks on YouTube and I mean, it does not hold up, man. So when I was a kid, it was the best shit of all time, dude. As an adult, I was like, God damn this.

[Damien Speranza]

So basically, after Ninja Turtles, they just went ham on, like, okay, we need an animal.

[Drew Montana]

Yeah.

[Damien Speranza]

That is also another thing.

[Drew Montana]

Right.

[Damien Speranza]

That we can just pump toys in and exploit. So we had street sharks, biker mice from Mars.

[Drew Montana]

Beetle Borgs.

[Damien Speranza]

Beetle, yes. Excuse me. Beetle Borgs. There was a Beetleborg ruled ninja something. There were cats. Did SWAT cats fall? Yes. SWAT cats would definitely. Toxic Crusaders was 100% a Ninja Turtles ripoff. As much as I love it.

[Drew Montana]

Yes.

[Damien Speranza]

Then the whole idea of him having friends instead of just Toxic Avenger is so that there would be five toys to sell instead of just the one.

[Drew Montana]

Yeah. Well, that's really all it was.

[Damien Speranza]

Well, that's all. The Ninja Turtles in the comic had red masks. And when they made it a cartoon, they changed the color of the mask so they could make the same toy four times and sell it four times.

[Unknown]

Yeah.

[Damien Speranza]

Just change the weapon with different accessories.

[Drew Montana]

Genius.

[Shannon]

You know where your business would be without you. Imagine where it could go with More of you.

[Zach Amico]

Well, with Wicks, you can create a.

[Shannon]

Website with more of your vision, your voice, your expertise. Wix gives you the freedom to truly own your brand and do it on your own with full customization and advanced AI tools that help turn your ideas into reality. Grow your business into your online brand. Because without you, your business is just business as usual.

[Damien Speranza]

Go to wix.com there's more. Oh, fuck. I said Biker Mice from Mars.

[Drew Montana]

Biker Mice from Cowboys of Mu Mesa.

[Damien Speranza]

Yes. Do you have a list, Harrington?

[Shannon]

I don't know what you guys are talking about.

[Damien Speranza]

90S cartoons that were Ninja Turtle ripoffs.

[Unknown]

I don't remember, so I'm kind of glad Shannon's drawing a blank, too. I only remembered the SWAT cats. I don't remember the rest of them.

[Damien Speranza]

I remember these vividly. This was my era. There we go. Street Sharks Battle toads. Extreme Dinosaurs.

[Drew Montana]

Samurai Pizza Cats.

[Damien Speranza]

Samurai Pizza Ducks.

[Drew Montana]

Mighty Ducks, obviously.

[Damien Speranza]

Kung Fu Dino Posse.

[Drew Montana]

How do we forget the Mighty Ducks? Anime.

[Damien Speranza]

Bucky o'. Hare. Excellent Nintendo game Had. That was my preschool picture. I am holding Bucky o' Hare figures now. Bring it back up real quick. Road Rovers and. Yep, SWAT cats. Yeah. Basically, they went, we need a thing and a thing.

[Drew Montana]

Yeah.

[Unknown]

But going back to the ice cream.

[Damien Speranza]

Yeah, we're not done with the ice cream.

[Unknown]

I will say I used to get pissed off I got the Minnie Mouse flavor. I didn't like that. It was always Mickey or Goofy were the two that I wanted.

[Damien Speranza]

Okay.

[Unknown]

And then the other ones were always a letdown if that's all they had.

[Damien Speranza]

I will say, best girl treat. Spice Girls lollipop.

[Drew Montana]

I don't remember those.

[Damien Speranza]

The Spice Girls lollipop was so goddamn good.

[Unknown]

It's such a random poll, dude.

[Damien Speranza]

Do you remember what I'm talking about, though?

[Unknown]

I do, but it's just so funny that. That.

[Damien Speranza]

They were solid.

[Unknown]

They were all right.

[Damien Speranza]

All right, let's go to the next one. Shannon. Yep, those are it. They were so good.

[Drew Montana]

Wait. Oh, I thought that was number two.

[Unknown]

No, I was too busy looking at Ginger Spice. The way she was licking it. That was very sexual.

[Damien Speranza]

Now, this is what I This. I believe they also had a sour version where there was sour gum at the bottom. This was a treat.

[Unknown]

It'll work your way to the bottom.

[Drew Montana]

Good stuff. But I don't think this is better than the Flintstone Pop.

[Damien Speranza]

No, I agree. I think Flintstone Pop goes above this.

[Drew Montana]

Yeah. Okay. That's a. It's a good ice cream, though.

[Damien Speranza]

Yeah. Keep it going.

[Shannon]

Next, bubble play.

[Unknown]

Same thing. I love that. I Love that.

[Damien Speranza]

Same thing. And then number one, I think they nailed.

[Unknown]

Oh yeah.

[Damien Speranza]

WWE had nothing better. No, the cookie. Best cookie. Yeah, I mean it's an ice cream sandwich on a stick. So it eliminates the messiness of the ice cream sandwich. Perfect. Summer tree got all about that. And it was almost like not a cookie as much as like a wafer.

[Unknown]

Can we still get those new.

[Damien Speranza]

They have a version of them now, but they're not the same.

[Unknown]

That's bullshit.

[Damien Speranza]

But yes, I would say that while the list wasn't perfect. Ending that on ending it on that. I know, yeah. Really?

[Unknown]

It was Lex Luthor on there.

[Damien Speranza]

Luger.

[Unknown]

Luger. Sorry, I know we just talking about Superman earlier.

[Drew Montana]

Yeah, they nailed the. They nailed the number one. I'd completely forgot about those two. I was expecting either Spider Man, Sonic or spongebob. But I felt like those. Those had to have been top 10 sellers.

[Shannon]

My by. Just real quick. My favorite one was not on the list. So I found it here in this like old school snapshot. It was the frog with the little Eminem on it.

[Drew Montana]

I like the frog.

[Unknown]

Snoopy.

[Damien Speranza]

I used to get Snoopy a lot too. Can you zoom in?

[Shannon]

Yep.

[Damien Speranza]

So those are the club. That's the strawberry shortcake. Then there's the chocolate one you liked. The King Kong was solid Magnum.

[Drew Montana]

I was a. I was always a fudgy guy too. Just a regular fudgy chocolate Bret Hart on that one.

[Damien Speranza]

Oh yeah, that's Push Pop.

[Unknown]

The Snoopy.

[Damien Speranza]

Snoopy, I love that one. I always liked an Italian ice Go back up Shannon. The love of Creamsicle. And then dude, years ago I lived with like two like pretty square roommates who would. Not the kind of person would make the jokes I would make.

[Unknown]

Right.

[Damien Speranza]

And it was a couple and they both maybe were a little on the spectrum.

[Unknown]

Nice.

[Damien Speranza]

And I was going to the store, I was like, you guys need anything? And the girl goes, yeah, can you get me a box of Magnums? And I did not know Magnum was an ice cream.

[Unknown]

Yeah.

[Damien Speranza]

And all I was thinking was wow. I didn't know my roommate had a huge.

[Unknown]

Well, he was on a spectrum. I give him something.

[Damien Speranza]

Yeah, gotta give him something to play with all day.

[Drew Montana]

Did you get him the condoms?

[Damien Speranza]

No. As I was leaving, I was like, do you really need. He's like, no, it's ice cream. Was. Oh, thank God.

[Unknown]

Do you really want these? Like who uses condoms?

[Damien Speranza]

Yeah, yuck.

[Unknown]

Right?

[Damien Speranza]

Okay, let's keep it moo. Then just end him. Four fifth grade girls plotted to murder a boy in the bathroom. And make it look like suicide.

[Unknown]

What the.

[Damien Speranza]

As a man who has gone on the Slender man murder tour, I'm very interested.

[Zach Amico]

Just end him. That was the goal of a group of 10 and 11 year old girls who. Surprise police say one wanted to kill a boy at school. The motive? He's accused of cheating on one of.

[Damien Speranza]

Them, so she wants him dead. Pause. Okay, Half the women watching this just agreed. Still, that's wild.

[Unknown]

Cheating at 10, 11 years old, he held somebody else's hand. All these 11 year olds, periods synced up and they decided they were going to kill this guy.

[Damien Speranza]

Oh, this poor guy. I mean, either that or he. All of them.

[Unknown]

It's the story they're not telling. It's the behind the scenes.

[Damien Speranza]

Shannon.

[Zach Amico]

According to the police report, four fifth grade students at Legacy Traditional School's West Surprise campus planned to lure a classmate to the charter school's outside bathroom and stab him in the stomach. And each girl had a role to play to get away with it. One would bring the knife. Another would forge a suicide note to make it seem like he took his own life. And someone would act as a lookout while the other carried out the stabbing. And to avoid fingerprints on the murder weapon, they would wear gloves. Documents say the friends came up with the plan during lunch and recess on October 1st. Legacy administrators worked with the school resource.

[Drew Montana]

This is turning into like a game of Clue on like an elementary school.

[Damien Speranza]

The funny thing is that at the end of recess, they're like, we're gonna finish playing it.

[Unknown]

It's like, how do they decide on it? You know, that stuff, Stupid game. The girls would play with the thing. Like they would do that to see who's gonna get the knife.

[Drew Montana]

Elizabeth with the pencil at the swing set.

[Damien Speranza]

This is very similar to the girls attracted the Slender Man.

[Drew Montana]

What was that?

[Damien Speranza]

They were girls that were afraid of Slender man and they decided to kill another girl in the group. And they stabbed her in the bathroom and left her there.

[Drew Montana]

When was this?

[Damien Speranza]

This was a number of years ago now. It's like a pretty famous.

[Unknown]

Were they 11? Two?

[Damien Speranza]

They weren't much old. They were like 13 or 14. I went on a. When I was on the road, the kid that put the show together drove me to the bathroom where that happened. And he showed me the route the girl had a crawl to. They found her on the side of the road. She lived, but he showed me how long of a crawl she had.

[Drew Montana]

It's so funny to imagine a group of like four girls planning your murder while you're playing kickball.

[Unknown]

Yeah, I was Just thinking about you.

[Drew Montana]

Just booming home runs and kickballs and there's girls watching you. Like, we're going to stab him.

[Damien Speranza]

Oh, this kid definitely had a good life. Cuz he's going big.

[Drew Montana]

Yeah, he's the man. Like, he's doing like back flips off the swing. Everyone's like, yeah. And they're like, we're going to kill this guy.

[Damien Speranza]

Oh yeah, dude, this kid, he had no idea either.

[Drew Montana]

Yeah, he was the man.

[Damien Speranza]

Yeah, he just had a great.

[Unknown]

Just discovered masturbation. He's get murdered like a week later.

[Drew Montana]

He's got ice cream all over his face from a Flintstones pop. He's running outside.

[Damien Speranza]

Kid rules. I keep it going.

[Zach Amico]

To investigate. When students who overheard the plot came forward the next day, their backpacks were searched and the suspects were individually questioned with.

[Shannon]

Can I just Real quickly.

[Damien Speranza]

Of course.

[Shannon]

The odds though, that like, this girl is pissed off this child and she's. And they're joking. Like, what are the odds that they're just like, oh, and then I'll scorn.

[Unknown]

Women don't joke.

[Shannon]

But maybe, I mean, like, what's the evidence that they were actually planning on doing that?

[Damien Speranza]

What are the chances that for the first time in history there's been four funny women and they all went to elementary school together? That's like getting hit by lightning while you win the lottery.

[Drew Montana]

This is just telling me that if Shannon had a kid while riding a shark up a school and there would be signs pointing to it the whole time.

[Unknown]

Shannon always believes all women like the rest.

[Damien Speranza]

Are you saying maybe Shannon. It was like a burn book type situation where they were being crazy?

[Shannon]

Maybe there's like. Like getting the rage out, you know, being crazy with your girls and then you move on from it. Maybe. I don't know.

[Damien Speranza]

No, I don't know. The whole Brink club.

[Unknown]

Yeah, that's a. Shannon thinks Johnny Depp was guilty. It was all him.

[Shannon]

Damon, you always get me wrong. You still don't understand me. I never picked this up.

[Unknown]

Jenna, I see you once every four months. How am I supposed to understand you? I just know that you like cats and have big boobs. I don't really.

[Damien Speranza]

That's fair.

[Shannon]

You get me.

[Damien Speranza]

Yeah, and there's also things we don't like about you.

[Shannon]

All right, here's the rest of it.

[Zach Amico]

With their parents present, all four children were then arrested for threatening and disorderly conduct misdemeanor.

[Drew Montana]

I've gotten a disorderly conduct. It was not that. It was for an eighth of weed. It's crazy. The spectacularly charged 100%. That's insane.

[Damien Speranza]

It seems like pretty orderly conduct. Like they had a plan.

[Drew Montana]

Change the charges.

[Zach Amico]

The police report says three of the students showed remorse, but the fourth would smile and laugh while making excuses for their actions.

[Damien Speranza]

That's the problem. Hold on. You know how they say, like, every school shoot, like, when it's two guys, one's the problem and the other is just that one who desperately wants a friend?

[Unknown]

Yep.

[Damien Speranza]

That one was in charge. That's the Faruza. Bulk of the craft group, if you will. That one's. That one's the one who's pushing it. And the other three are going along with the plan.

[Unknown]

Bunch of followers. And she wasn't even the ones who stab them. I guarantee you, she's the ones like. I'll be the lookout, you three bitches.

[Damien Speranza]

I'll buy the gloves.

[Drew Montana]

I'll bring the gloves.

[Damien Speranza]

Shannon, your thoughts?

[Shannon]

It's. Yeah.

[Unknown]

Your argument went away. Your argument is now moot.

[Shannon]

It was just a suggestion. I just wonder how they proved it in court that they actually intended it to. To happen.

[Damien Speranza]

It seems like that when they wrote kill him, End him.

[Unknown]

Right. K. Do, like, he really separated it out.

[Damien Speranza]

All right. Is there more?

[Shannon]

Just like, two seconds. Oh, just kidding.

[Drew Montana]

Two seconds.

[Unknown]

The school.

[Damien Speranza]

Yeah.

[Unknown]

Legacy, traditional, whatever. Surprise.

[Damien Speranza]

So now the question is sound.

[Drew Montana]

A private school.

[Damien Speranza]

Those kids get to go back to school or they got to go somewhere else.

[Shannon]

They're suspended or ex. What is it called?

[Damien Speranza]

Expelled.

[Shannon]

Expelled.

[Drew Montana]

Yeah. They're gonna have to go to a different school. That was my thought, though, because it seemed like a private school, like a very expensive school. If this. If the one girl who was like, the. The mastermind of it, if they say they do, like, whatever, like, get the murder out of her mind, she's still going to be a crazy later in her life.

[Damien Speranza]

And now. Yeah, now she's gonna have access to poor people.

[Drew Montana]

Right? She's gonna be the type lady to, like, call someone on a Delta flight in 30 years. Like, you're going to see a video of her spazzing in public.

[Unknown]

But also her reputation is going to. Like, that whole group now is the group that almost killed somebody. I mean, like, you can't. There's no. There's no escaping that.

[Drew Montana]

Which going into high school could be kind of cool.

[Unknown]

True.

[Damien Speranza]

Well, I mean, I think you got to. You got to separate them, right?

[Drew Montana]

Yeah, for sure.

[Damien Speranza]

If you're the parent. I mean, I think they're. It has to be. They're expelled. And you can't put all four of them. Well, any together I mean, how many.

[Unknown]

Charter schools are in the area? Are they going to just end up being put into another charter school?

[Damien Speranza]

I think you got to move.

[Drew Montana]

Yeah. I was going say if any of the parents are good, they will move because it's like, yeah, my daughter. I would move. My daughter almost killed a guy.

[Damien Speranza]

Move and have her start going by her middle name.

[Unknown]

I don't think, like, if any of the parents are good. None of those parents of those four kids were good. That's why they were all going to kill somebody.

[Damien Speranza]

I'm going to take a wild guess and say for at least one of those girls, Dad's not in the picture.

[Unknown]

Fair point. Mom's on, like herself.

[Damien Speranza]

Yeah. And Mom's got some things to say about dad.

[Unknown]

Oh, yeah.

[Drew Montana]

Oh, yeah.

[Unknown]

Your father was a terrible person. He's the one that did this to us.

[Damien Speranza]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Drew Montana]

They hate men in that house.

[Damien Speranza]

Yeah, yeah. As. As someone who's been chased around by his own grandmother while she screamed, there's a woman at your father's apartment, and he's fucking threw things at me.

[Drew Montana]

I don't even think that's a fourth grade thought. Like, he cheated on me. I have to kill him. That's something you hear at home. You know what I mean?

[Unknown]

Yeah. Well, they grow up a lot more now. This is wild what these kids talk.

[Damien Speranza]

About now, I think. Yeah. I would say that's. That is maybe the daughter of a scorned woman who's seen too many movies.

[Unknown]

Guys, guys. She could have just been misunderstood, right?

[Drew Montana]

Yeah, Right. She could have really been cheated on.

[Damien Speranza]

Like, cheated on.

[Drew Montana]

Like, this guy's really getting out here.

[Unknown]

Like, imagine we feel bad for this dude and he's just out there.

[Drew Montana]

He's teachers spreading herpes around the elementary school. He's a true piece of.

[Damien Speranza]

Yeah, you know what?

[Unknown]

He should have died. They should have stabbed him.

[Damien Speranza]

That so? And also, stabbing the stomach is such a. Not suicide.

[Unknown]

Yeah, Right. Yeah. Who's gonna know it is in Japanese culture?

[Damien Speranza]

Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Maybe he was Japanese.

[Unknown]

Maybe she was.

[Damien Speranza]

Yeah, that'll do.

[Drew Montana]

They went to the Hillary Clinton School of suicides. They're like, oh, you're gonna shoot him in the head four times.

[Damien Speranza]

Yeah, we're gonna poison him and drown him in two feet of water.

[Unknown]

It's also funny, they called it an outside bathroom and not like a porta potty or something.

[Damien Speranza]

By the way, if they really wanted to do that, wouldn't you just have two of the. Two of the. The two prettiest of the four go, hey, if you hold this knife to your wrist, we'll both suck your dick and then you go.

[Drew Montana]

It'S a Dave Chappelle prank.

[Damien Speranza]

Gotcha. I could have been talking.

[Drew Montana]

What did the five knives say to the face? Stab.

[Damien Speranza]

What did the hunting knives say to the veins? I could have been. I. I could have been fooled into some wild.

[Unknown]

Yeah, everybody you want. Yeah.

[Damien Speranza]

14. Yeah. Or 11, right? 11. 11 tits.

[Drew Montana]

They should have found the one girl in the grade with tits and had her to convince him of anything.

[Damien Speranza]

No, she's got a job ready. It's to be the first girl that gets pregnant.

[Drew Montana]

Yeah, I wonder if one of those.

[Unknown]

10 year olds still believed in Santa and was doing, you know, I mean, it's still doing this. I'm just not gonna get nothing for Christmas this year.

[Damien Speranza]

Yeah, I've had this conversation before, but something I love to do. Do you remember the first and last name of the first girl that grew tits when you were growing up in your school?

[Unknown]

Yeah, yeah. She was left back from the year. Katie Scoobich.

[Drew Montana]

Tori. She's dead now. All right.

[Damien Speranza]

Dude, every guy. I've. I've never had a guy go, nah, skip. Dude, I can't remember my teachers names. I can't remember basic things that happened to me. I remember Danielle Nappy and Sasha Manifarte grew fat tits. We were in eighth or ninth grade and it is burned in my fucking brain.

[Drew Montana]

I can't tell you who my baseball coach was. My science teacher couldn't name him with.

[Damien Speranza]

A gun to my head. But if you don't think I remember, dude, when.

[Drew Montana]

When Tori. Big titties rip. When she passed away. Me and my boys were all in the car when we found. And it was funny because like six months earlier I was with that same group of friends and one of our friends that we like grew up with and he was one of the boys, he died. And we all found out at the same time and we reacted worse. When Tori died, we were all like. When Aaron died it was kind of like a. Like a. You joke around with your friends, like try and make light of it. When Tori died, we all sat there in silence for five minutes and just remembered her tits. Nobody said a word. We were all silenced for the Ds.

[Damien Speranza]

It was just a big pair of tits. And you guys driving on the other side of the tits took a fork in the road. See you again.

[Drew Montana]

Yeah, she's up there in boob heaven.

[Damien Speranza]

Yeah. Her sister's tits had a player for the last movie. They had a CGI her over her.

[Unknown]

Sister'S this is a wild time, though, when gym class takes that turn and all of a sudden jumping jacks are way more fun to watch.

[Damien Speranza]

Dude. Getting wild. Dude, I remember. And I love tits. I think it's why I grow them. I remember in college in a mic, I took a comedy class, a girl not realizing how low cut her shirt was, the way she was sitting. And I fell out of my chair trying to slide down it to see more tit and fell on my ass in front of the room very obviously trying to see Tess, that girl. Rachel Bloom from my crazy ex girlfriend. Incredibly famous. Come now.

[Drew Montana]

Oh, she's famous.

[Damien Speranza]

Really? Yeah. Look at Rachel Bloom.

[Unknown]

Oh, I gotta see this.

[Damien Speranza]

She's super. My wife saw her at like MSJ or something.

[Unknown]

Really?

[Damien Speranza]

Yeah, dude, she's like a super famous chick.

[Unknown]

Jesus, I didn't know that. All right, well, now I'm curious.

[Damien Speranza]

Oh, she's big Jew Honkers Jubs, as we call them in the business.

[Drew Montana]

I'm excited. Pull these things up.

[Unknown]

I know. I was waiting for them to pop on the screen. I think Shannon's slow playing up.

[Damien Speranza]

Hey. Yep. Shout out. Shout out to those fucking big jubirs.

[Unknown]

You have a new fan. Hello.

[Damien Speranza]

Very beautiful and very funny. She has a bunch of. She was on. She had a great sitcom that was only on for one season where it was. She was like the showrunner for a reboot of a sitcom.

[Unknown]

Okay.

[Damien Speranza]

And Paul Reiser was her dad and he was the original showrunner. I think it was called the reboot or the remake or something. It was really funny.

[Unknown]

Oh.

[Damien Speranza]

But, yeah, she was on my crazy ex girlfriend.

[Drew Montana]

God damn.

[Unknown]

Good Lord. Hello.

[Damien Speranza]

Yeah, she was. Oh, my God. I thought she was the hottest chick in the world.

[Unknown]

Yeah. Sometimes when they have. Are you a titter ass man? Well, you're probably an ass man now.

[Drew Montana]

Yeah, a little bit of both. I don't know.

[Damien Speranza]

As a wigger?

[Drew Montana]

Yeah, as a wigger. No, I'm. I'm kind of going back to the other side.

[Damien Speranza]

That's because, dude, that's what it always is.

[Drew Montana]

Yeah, I like tits. The older I get.

[Damien Speranza]

It's also. I feel like whatever you have at home, you wanted something.

[Unknown]

Yeah.

[Damien Speranza]

Yeah. So, like, my wife's got a giant ass, so I just watched Big Tip porn.

[Unknown]

That's right.

[Drew Montana]

Yeah.

[Damien Speranza]

Like when you had a string of big asses, Right. All you can think about is tits. And then when you grow.

[Unknown]

Okay. Somebody asked me this recently and I'm.

[Damien Speranza]

Curious, what is a weird thing that.

[Unknown]

Turns you guys on physically about a woman? Like, for me Stretch marks don't. Stretch marks get me going.

[Damien Speranza]

I mean, mine's tan line sometimes, but I think that's pretty. Like, that's like an old school.

[Unknown]

Yeah, Yeah.

[Damien Speranza]

I mean, mine, it's smelling armpits.

[Unknown]

Smelly armpits or just the smelling that they let you smell them.

[Damien Speranza]

Yeah, yeah.

[Unknown]

Okay.

[Damien Speranza]

Yeah, an armpit will get me.

[Drew Montana]

I. So I. I think, like, everyone likes a firm boob. Like a firm fake one. But when you see something hanging that gets.

[Damien Speranza]

Oh, like. Like nails, egg to a. They still gotta be full, though, right?

[Unknown]

Like, you don't want, like, used IV bags.

[Drew Montana]

No, no, no, they still gotta be full, but I like a little drip to them now.

[Unknown]

Okay.

[Damien Speranza]

Okay. That's fair.

[Drew Montana]

Yeah.

[Damien Speranza]

I feel like the older I get, the more I'm into, like, mom is checks like, like, 34. Like, getting into even, like, 50s. Like, something about it.

[Unknown]

Yeah, I can see that. I think.

[Damien Speranza]

Well, I think as I get older, that's just. Yeah.

[Unknown]

This seems more attainable too. So it's more of, like, play the fantasy in your head more.

[Damien Speranza]

Yeah, it makes more sense.

[Unknown]

Yeah, I get that. Yeah. I don't know. Stretch marks over the last couple of years just popped into my brain.

[Damien Speranza]

You would think I'm so fucking hot.

[Unknown]

I mean, what do you think? I came to do the show?

[Damien Speranza]

Fucking, I would shove you up, brother.

[Unknown]

I sat in traffic to come see you.

[Damien Speranza]

I can see that, though. I could. In the certain. I can think of certain girls that had stretch marks on their hips. That's really big ass. Yeah, yeah, that'll do it.

[Unknown]

Yeah. Like on the thighs a little bit. Yeah, yeah, I'm into it.

[Damien Speranza]

I hooked up with a girl once who had red pubic hair, and that was wild. I've never done that neon red. It was a little triangle and. God damn. She was like, see throw.

[Unknown]

Oh, my God, that is pale. Yeah. Okay. I guess I got a friend that's into, like, the. When you can see the veins and the tits.

[Damien Speranza]

Okay.

[Drew Montana]

Okay.

[Damien Speranza]

Yeah.

[Drew Montana]

I don't hate that.

[Damien Speranza]

All right.

[Unknown]

I mean, I'm not gonna turn it down, but I'm not, like, all right.

[Damien Speranza]

It's not something you seek out.

[Unknown]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm not looking for that, Harrington.

[Drew Montana]

What was the question?

[Damien Speranza]

What's something that's not usually a fetish that really turns you on about checks? Like, neckline. Okay. I like a good.

[Unknown]

A good neck.

[Damien Speranza]

Yeah. The good clavicles. Anything where it's, like, that's protruding.

[Drew Montana]

I'm like, all right, there's something there.

[Damien Speranza]

Yeah. What a nice way to Say your wife has small pets.

[Unknown]

I don't go past the clavicles.

[Damien Speranza]

And you know, I think Alex is extremely beautiful and I'm very happy for you both. Shannon, you gotta think about guys that you think mo because yours is gonna be like arms tall.

[Drew Montana]

Were there sweets of my cat five' eleven? No, my thing funny.

[Shannon]

Sometimes my things are like tattoo related. Like I like a tattooed hand really gets me.

[Damien Speranza]

I'm out.

[Unknown]

I'm out.

[Shannon]

And then also, if not the tattooed hand, when the sleeve of tattoo has like a hard line like right at the wrist. I don't know. There's something about it that really gets me.

[Drew Montana]

You know what those are sweat answers, dude.

[Damien Speranza]

What?

[Drew Montana]

Shannon give us physical traits that we were born with.

[Unknown]

Drew just wants you to keep going. You name something that applies to him.

[Drew Montana]

Tell me something about me.

[Unknown]

Somebody that had a wreck coon as a pet for a little while. That's really my thing. They're close to cats, right?

[Damien Speranza]

Hats with fishing lures on the visor.

[Unknown]

I've always wanted to meet a fiery wood fairy or whatever.

[Damien Speranza]

All right, I want to end on this because I think this would be two good. Two good friends to talk about this with. I kind of went on a rabbit hole this week with a weird AI thing that came up on 4chan. And essentially it started as a post that was saying it was a demonic AI that was using the Internet to retcon itself into history. And it was this post threatening that, you know, this is this coding demonic AI where it wants to create a fake person. And the more you Google it and the more you look into it, it's going to make more and more fake articles that have supposedly never existed before. But it's pre. It's dating them like it's always existed.

[Unknown]

Jesus.

[Damien Speranza]

And one of the things they're that some people are saying is not a real person who has been created by AI. And of course I do not take this seriously. I just enjoy the silly.

[Unknown]

Right, right.

[Damien Speranza]

And it's a fun read. Is a comic called Roy J. Who apparently no one has heard of ever. And his jokes don't really. He's. He's European. And I can't figure out what the fuck his jokes are.

[Unknown]

Oh boy.

[Damien Speranza]

And it almost seems like AI trying to. I could get the idea that people think it's not a real person, that it's AI's idea of what funny is.

[Drew Montana]

So you think AI made this guy, but you're not sure.

[Damien Speranza]

That's what the theory people have is that this guy is not a real now, of course, it's been debunked. I'm just enjoying, I'm enjoying the thing. But Shane, can you bring up the stuff? Roy J. They're saying he moves weird and he doesn't make. Makes sense. Friendly stranger in a black Sudan Won't you hop inside my car? I've got candy flaws I'm a traveling man and I will take you to the nearest star hey. Hi, weirdos. I used to be a schizophrenic but we're both okay now. Wow. This place is, is weird, huh? Slither. Slither's his catchphrase. I met a guy outside tonight. Slither. Honestly, Olympic Games. I said, are you a pole vaulter? He said, no German, but how did you know my name? I boogied on down to the disco. Spooky. You'll all be doing it tomorrow. The fuck are we watching? Spike. Spike spoke. Spook. Spook is how they went.

[Drew Montana]

Is this Howie Mandel? Are you fucking with me?

[Unknown]

What the fuck is happening right now?

[Damien Speranza]

Right? It's. So by the way, I will say, are you a Paul vaulter? Yeah, yeah, chairman. But how'd you know my name is.

[Unknown]

Funny, but I mean, I just don't know what the fuck is happening. Right?

[Damien Speranza]

I'm so, so weird. And people have been posting this saying, isn't this almost like what a robot would write as far as like, like the whole slither. Those. But like there's no a catalyst.

[Unknown]

Right.

[Damien Speranza]

For those being the catchphrases. So, Shannon, can you tell us anything from the article or.

[Shannon]

Yeah, so they say that, that people that were very familiar, I guess, with his content online all of a sudden would see new videos posted, but that predated the old videos. So that's why they, they think it's. And then they say that like his accent doesn't necessarily fit in a certain place. The punch lines aren't where they supposed, where they're supposed to be. So that, that's like in the ticks of how they think. He's not real. I, I don't hate it.

[Drew Montana]

You gotta get him on the show.

[Unknown]

I mean, that's awful. I, I, I'm actually angry at you that we're gonna end on this clip.

[Damien Speranza]

We're gonna finish it.

[Unknown]

Like, there's more.

[Damien Speranza]

Oh, yeah.

[Unknown]

Why is there more?

[Damien Speranza]

How long?

[Shannon]

Seven minutes.

[Damien Speranza]

What the fuck are you guys.

[Unknown]

I drove from Connecticut to watch this shit.

[Damien Speranza]

Yep. This is insane.

[Drew Montana]

I drove from Philly.

[Unknown]

We came to watch this.

[Damien Speranza]

It is really four hours.

[Unknown]

And that was a full fucking theater or something too. That Guy like had a whole full audience.

[Damien Speranza]

That's oddly off. It's, it's. Something about it isn't right.

[Unknown]

But you also can't not watch it. That's what pisses me off. If you saw me, I couldn't look away from the TV the whole time.

[Damien Speranza]

It's the fact that Spook and Slither are not previously mentioned. And those are just words he says.

[Drew Montana]

Neither was hamburger.

[Damien Speranza]

Yeah, hamburger, hamburger. But if I was a black circuit comic, it would be hot barbecue. I would end every joke with hot barbecue.

[Drew Montana]

I like how hamburger was like billed as this clean comedian and on the def jam set or the one that got famous walks out and he just starts making fun of women for being fat. But it is still like all clean jokes.

[Unknown]

I've worked with him. He's still, it's, it's funny. I did some of the last year, same thing.

[Drew Montana]

Dude, that guy makes me laugh. He's like, look at this big joker up here in the front. Hamburger.

[Unknown]

Yep. Just as a way to avoid cursing Shannon.

[Damien Speranza]

Keep it going. Hey, guys. You ever wake up in the morning and just feel soft? Like your coffee is warming your hands but not doing a damn thing for your balls or your brain? Well, that's why they created Body Brain Coffee. It's not just coffee. It's coffee with purpose. Specifically, testosterone. Packed with clinically backed ingredients. This isn't your girlfriend's oat milk latte. This is for men who want to get their edge back in the gym, in the boardroom, and yeah, the bedroom too. And it's not just about testosterone. Body Brain is also built to dial in your focus, clarity and mood. Thanks to lion's maneuver, Ashwagandha and L Theanine. So while your basic brew is giving you the jitters in a crash, Body Brain coffee is helping you stay sharp, calm and locked in, all while supporting your natural T levels. If you're serious about your energy, your mindset, and your masculinity, it starts with what you put in your cup. And you can save 15% today with the promo code ZOO15.Z [e-mail] that's bodybraincoffee.com promo code ZOO15. Power your day, fuel your drive. Let's get back into the program. Slither remembered me. Spike's weird. Had a pumpkin under his arm. I said, hey, Spike, what are you doing with the pumpkin? He said, is it 12 o' clock already? Good joke.

[Drew Montana]

Damien hates this so much.

[Damien Speranza]

Apparently this is also a prisoner outfit from some country.

[Unknown]

Is it that the. With the white gloves?

[Damien Speranza]

No, the, the, the. The. The outfit is a prison something. A prison uniform.

[Unknown]

He escaped the mental asylum, something like that? Yeah, a hundred percent. He's weird.

[Damien Speranza]

I've got to talk to someone about it. He crossed a Rhode island wreck with a crystal ball. Now he's got a chicken that gets in touch with the other side of the road. Jesus Christ. What a weird disco spook. So this weird chick. Wow, she was so weird. She was putting Grecian 2000 on the legs. He's killing. She was so thin, her boobs were in single file. That's a little funny. I said, hey, babe. Sliver. She slithered. I can't do it. I'm out. I'm out. I'm tapping.

[Unknown]

Okay. You know how there's comics, right, that like you can see them on stage and their jokes, you're like, oh, those are structurally sound. I get why the crowd would laugh. But you still hate them.

[Damien Speranza]

Yes.

[Unknown]

That's this guy.

[Damien Speranza]

She was so thin, her boobs are. Single file. Is funny.

[Unknown]

I get the joke, but I hate his. Him as a person. So the Persona. I can't get on board.

[Damien Speranza]

Anything that he's saying, it's horrendous.

[Drew Montana]

Well, because that guy at the bar or in the green room, like before or after the show, he's a nightmare.

[Damien Speranza]

Yeah.

[Drew Montana]

You don't want to.

[Damien Speranza]

He's unbearable.

[Drew Montana]

Yeah.

[Damien Speranza]

He takes it really seriously. Or he's like an egomaniac monster.

[Drew Montana]

Yeah.

[Unknown]

He's able to pull this off that people love this character.

[Damien Speranza]

He can you bring him up just like his wiki or whatever.

[Unknown]

Is he dead? Hopefully he's dead.

[Damien Speranza]

I believe he is.

[Unknown]

Thank God. There is a God.

[Damien Speranza]

Yeah. So the theory, of course, that I don't subscribe to, but I do enjoy reading. Yeah. Is that he's a British Norwegian stand up that AI invented. And yes. Spook, slither hither. And he apparently was a high profile television comedian in the 80s on British TV. And he's got a whole bio here. But people are. Some people are claiming that they've never seen these videos before and they're showing up watermarked from the past.

[Drew Montana]

I mean I've never, I've never seen or heard of this guy. But also that wasn't my. My heyday 48 to 07, so.

[Damien Speranza]

Yeah. But I feel like we know Mr. Bean, right? We know Benny Hill. Why is that all these people are discovering this guy now.

[Unknown]

He was so before his time with his fucking eyeliner, white gloves, yellow socks and weird rhythm.

[Damien Speranza]

Because I get I. I guess maybe he's trying to do like a weird. Like, postmodern, Almost like a Klaus Nomi like, weirdo act.

[Unknown]

But it worked because he. That was. Yeah, there was a full room of people there that listened to that modern drum circle shit that he was playing the back.

[Drew Montana]

I posted a clip today that sounded worse than that, so.

[Damien Speranza]

Trust me, I've watched 10 today that were way worse than that.

[Unknown]

Once they get that outfits even helps my career.

[Drew Montana]

I need a catchphrase.

[Damien Speranza]

So fucking weird. Let's leave on this. Keep it fun for the kids. You guys know I love true crime in the. In the. In the. In the audience of the Internet. Our good. Our good friend Gypsy Rose Blanchard, since being free, has been married. I believe she's been divorced. She went. Another guy thought she was pregnant. Was she? I don't know. Well, anyway, she went out and did karaoke.

[Unknown]

Oh, boy.

[Damien Speranza]

So she's put out a statement recently about how she has forgiven herself and should not be blamed for her completely mentally devoid of emotion, boyfriend slaughtering her mother. And if you've seen the crime scene photos, it's brutal. And she claims she was not there. She was hiding in the bathroom. I don't believe her for a second. She killed that lady too. Anyway, let's see her do karaoke. Something else you're searching for Lady Gaga. You skipped to her.

[Drew Montana]

Is this her? Is this her and her boyfriend?

[Unknown]

Her boyfriend?

[Damien Speranza]

I don't know. Shannon.

[Shannon]

Yes, it's her new husband. Hilarious, baby daddy. It's so cringy.

[Damien Speranza]

Is it?

[Shannon]

She's supposed to start.

[Damien Speranza]

Oh, no. And everyone's selling.

[Drew Montana]

They all know who it is. She's a recognizable face.

[Unknown]

I mean, she killed her mom. And then this song. It's terrible.

[Drew Montana]

This is like. Like when you're that infamous, there's, like, certain. You can't do anymore. You know what I mean? Like, you know, remember Brock Turner? The guy that, like, raped the girl behind the dumpster? Stanford. Apparently he signed up for the Go Bananas open mic recently in Cincinnati, and my buddy was hosting it. And they. They saw the list and he went by a different name. Like a different stage name, obviously.

[Damien Speranza]

Yeah, but he still dumpster diver.

[Drew Montana]

He still. He still used the email Brock Turner at Stanford Edu. And that's. That's how they. They looked at it. And they were like, wait, the Brock Turner? And then he showed up and they were like, yeah, man, you can't do the open mic here. What are you talking about? You want to start comedy now? Like, I feel like if you're that infamous. You can't go do karaoke because, like, it's not about the other people on the show anymore. It's. Even with karaoke, it's not about someone stealing the show, but, like, you just made it all about you. If you murdered your mom, famously, what songs would have.

[Damien Speranza]

Should she have done? It doesn't.

[Unknown]

You can't do anything whimsical if you've murdered somebody. You can't do any whimsical in front of people.

[Damien Speranza]

Okay, I'm going. Killer queen.

[Drew Montana]

Hilarious. Psycho killer.

[Damien Speranza]

Psycho killer would be a good one. What? I said, what are other.

[Unknown]

What.

[Damien Speranza]

What are, like, good? Like mom songs? I was gonna say Tears from Heaven. Oh, yep. That would be good.

[Unknown]

Yeah.

[Drew Montana]

Anything from Greece.

[Damien Speranza]

Yep. That would. Yeah, that would be tough. I'm trying to think what else. I'm trying. What would be some. A song for Mama. Yeah. I feel like none of these.

[Unknown]

I always love my mama.

[Damien Speranza]

Yeah. I feel like none of these are famous enough that they would be karaoke songs. Yeah. I guess you just gotta go stab songs about stabbing.

[Drew Montana]

I mean, any of these are very funny, though.

[Unknown]

Yeah.

[Drew Montana]

Somebody's hero.

[Damien Speranza]

Mama tried. Yeah. Yeah. There we go. That's the best one.

[Unknown]

Funny.

[Damien Speranza]

What about. Is that Dio? That just does Mother. No, that's. Oh, Bob. No, that's dancing. And that's the song. If she had gone on stage and done. Mother. Mother. My retarded boyfriend stabbing you. He can't make eye contact, and now you're in a pile of goo. Mother.

[Drew Montana]

There was a weird thing when she first got out where people were trying to be like, she's hot, isn't she? I was like, no, she looks insane.

[Damien Speranza]

Mother told everyone I had cancer and was retarded.

[Drew Montana]

Oh, yeah, that was the thing.

[Damien Speranza]

Head gave me a feeding tube. She's not bad.

[Drew Montana]

Maybe.

[Unknown]

Compared to what? Yeah.

[Drew Montana]

All right, maybe I was wrong.

[Unknown]

I mean, yeah, Drew you.

[Shannon]

She got a lot of work done out. Like, she got her teeth done.

[Damien Speranza]

Was. Well, yeah, because the mom took her teeth out.

[Shannon]

Yeah. But she, like, she. Yeah, she fixed a lot of stuff about herself because I don't know if you watched that documentary as soon as she got out of jail.

[Unknown]

No.

[Shannon]

Yeah, I did. Yeah, she got a lot done.

[Damien Speranza]

Yeah. So the mom had taken her teeth out, saying that they were gonna fall out anyway. It was completely unnecessary. She gave her a feeding tube she didn't need. She shaved her head. She made her all up.

[Drew Montana]

So, I mean, yeah, she probably should have got her boyfriend to kill her mom.

[Damien Speranza]

I just feel bad. I don't feel like he. So he's doing life, right? And she's out doing karaoke. Yeah. And it's poor. Just this poor. Just wanted some. Just wanted some pussy.

[Drew Montana]

Yeah.

[Unknown]

That's what these fucking 411 year olds are gonna turn into.

[Damien Speranza]

That's what they should have done. They should have another kid and convinced him to kill that guy and they all would have gotten away with it. Full circle. We are the perfect criminals. 11 year old girls, if you need to plan a murder, come to us. Me, Damian, Drew, we have got you. Use your feminine wiles. You can convince a boy to do it. Look at Gypsy. And that's what we learned today. Thank you so much for tuning in. Please check out Drew Montana, Damien Speranza online. Support their comedy, support everything they do. And thank you so much to Shannon and Harrington filling in in the booth. And we will see you this Wednesday with an exclusive episode on Friday here on the old morning Zoom pop may go chug it down just like the big ob and join the crew. It's acamiko morning too. It's acamiko work morning too.