0033. Joe List and Che Durena - Zac Amico's Morning Zoo

Summary4 min read

The Luis and Zac Show - Episode 0033: Featuring Joe List and Che Durena

Release Date: February 2, 2025

1. Episode Kickoff and Guest Introductions (00:49 - 02:25)

The episode begins with hosts Luis J. Gomez and Zach Amico enthusiastically discussing their recent takeover of SiriusXM's Sam Roberts show and their transition to the GaS Digital Network. They introduce their guests for the episode:

Joe List: A renowned comedian known for his appearances on various podcasts and his stand-up specials.
Che Durena: A multifaceted comedian with a strong presence on social media and a growing stand-up career.

Notable Quote:

Joe List (00:49): "We're in the ascension era of the Lewis and Zach show."

2. The Air Horn Debate (02:25 - 04:40)

The conversation shifts to a humorous debate about the origins of the air horn. The hosts and guests discuss whether Cypher Sounds invented the air horn or if it predates him, touching upon its association with Rihanna.

Notable Quote:

Che Durena (03:09): "Cypher Sounds was the first one. He discovered that lady Rihanna."

3. Creating a GoFundMe for Shannon Lee's Breast Surgery (04:40 - 06:19)

A significant portion of the episode features a comedic segment where the hosts and guests brainstorm a GoFundMe campaign for Shannon Lee, their producer, to replace her aging fake breasts. They joke about various donation incentives, such as photos and humorous rewards.

Notable Quotes:

Joe List (04:51): "How do you think I'd give money to something about Shannon? She's looking like the witch from Snow White."
Che Durena (05:08): "I have a life."

4. Skank Fest Ticket Sales and Giveaways (06:19 - 08:50)

The hosts announce that Skank Fest tickets are going on sale shortly and reveal plans to give away all-access passes during the live show. They discuss the event's location in New Orleans, highlighting its multiple venues and the inclusion of carnival rides and potential celebrity appearances, humorously mentioning former President Trump as a possible attendee.

Notable Quote:

Joe List (07:06): "Fremont street was one of the greatest experiences of everyone's lives."

5. Adventures in Montreal's Strip Clubs (08:50 - 15:47)

The discussion shifts to personal anecdotes about visiting Montreal's strip clubs. The guests share bizarre and humorous experiences, including interactions with performers and peculiar incidents that underscore the unique nightlife of Montreal.

Notable Quote:

Che Durena (13:09): "She was like this... She's like, I'm not supposed to go in the steam room with my lip filler."

6. Story Wars and Accusations of Cheating (15:47 - 29:43)

A lively segment unfolds around "Story Wars," a game where participants share stories to earn points. The hosts and guests recount a cheating scandal involving a participant named Bobby Kelly, who allegedly copied answers and manipulated points to win unfairly. The group expresses frustration and humorously debates the integrity of the game.

Notable Quotes:

Che Durena (26:05): "I want a rematch. I want soda out of there. I want his kids dead. I want his house burned to the ground."
Joe List (28:15): "It's comparable to Wheel of Fortune—randomness adds excitement."

7. Rideshare Discrimination Incident (29:43 - 60:23)

The hosts discuss a troubling incident where a rideshare driver refused service to a larger passenger, leading to a lawsuit. They debate the ethical implications and legality of such discrimination, sharing personal opinions and reinforcing the importance of inclusive service practices.

Notable Quotes:

Che Durena (59:12): "They're allowed to ask, but if they deny you, that's a form of discrimination."
Joe List (60:20): "There's a separate line for Hilton Honors members. It's like separate but equal."

8. Final Push for Skank Fest and Closing Remarks (60:23 - 73:52)

As the show nears its end, the hosts provide a final push for Skank Fest ticket sales, revealing that pre-sale tickets quickly sold out during the live broadcast. They share updates on their upcoming tours, special events, and encourage listeners to stay connected through various platforms. The episode concludes with light-hearted banter about personal habits and plans, maintaining the show's signature comedic energy.

Notable Quote:

Che Durena (73:25): "We need those [tickets]."
Joe List (73:44): "Skankfest tickets are officially on sale. Go to yokradium.com/skankfest and grab your pre-sale tickets."

Key Takeaways and Insights:

Engaging Banter: The episode exemplifies the hosts' ability to maintain high-energy, humorous interactions with their guests, ensuring an entertaining listening experience.
Community Interaction: By incorporating live giveaways and listener call-ins, the show fosters a sense of community and active participation among its audience.
Comedic Storytelling: Guests like Joe List and Che Durena contribute rich, humorous narratives that enhance the episode's dynamic and keep listeners engaged.
Event Promotion: A significant focus on promoting Skank Fest underscores the podcast's role in supporting and expanding the comedy festival scene.

Conclusion:

Episode 0033 of The Luis and Zac Show delivers a whirlwind of humor, candid conversations, and interactive segments. With charismatic guests Joe List and Che Durena, the hosts navigate through topics ranging from bizarre personal stories to ethical debates, all while maintaining their trademark comedic flair. The episode not only entertains but also actively involves listeners through live ticket giveaways, reinforcing the show's reputation as a cornerstone in the comedy podcast landscape.

Loading summary

Transcript1,208 lines

[00:01]
Lewis J. Gomez
Fill her up.
[00:02]
Zach Amico
You're listening to the Gas Digital Network.
[00:10]
Joe List
You know what time it is?
[00:11]
Che Durena
They say life a bit tight at night. Boy, we diving in.
[00:14]
Joe List
We got Zakamiko, red dot, head shot.
[00:16]
Che Durena
Eat a sniper.
[00:17]
Joe List
The Puerto Rican point guard striking like a viper.
[00:22]
Che Durena
And it came to attack. Spilling crack on the track. Spin straight facts.
[00:50]
Joe List
Oh, baby. Boys, it's a Wednesday. You know what the fuck's up? It's Lewis and Zach coming off the heels of a SiriusXF takeover yesterday. Crushed it on the Sam Roberts show. Took over the bonfire. Me and Zach are in the ascension era of the Lewis and Zach show, so.
[01:09]
Lewis J. Gomez
Also, no one works with Sirius anymore. It's just a ghost town.
[01:13]
Joe List
It is. It feels.
[01:14]
Lewis J. Gomez
We just walked in and did every show.
[01:15]
Joe List
It feels like it's an abandoned hospital. And it is kind of scary and kind of sad to be honest with you. But hey, you know what? I'm glad my friends have jobs there. This is the guest digital network, the number one comedy podcast network in the world. To get uncensored ad free content, go subscribe to Gas Digital. If you're watching this on YouTube or anywhere else, you should know we do an uncensored version of the show. An ad free version of the show. Yet pre release you get to watch the live streams. Talk to everyone in the racist live chat. Lots of people in the racist live chat today. Carly Ray Jenkins here. Roland Dutchess is here. Amy Winehouse, baby daddy. My arch nemesis is here. Mantis producer, Jorge Ludy, big champ. Infections. What the up? Also, we do a bonus show every Friday, so go subscribe to Gas Digital. Use that promo code, Laz. You get a discount. You get a bonus Lewis and Zach show every single week just for being a subscriber. Pretty fucking sick this week. Sagalo and Joe Gorman gonna be on gonna be a sick one. International superstar Zach Amico's here.
[02:11]
Lewis J. Gomez
Feeling good, buddy.
[02:12]
Joe List
You should be. You look good, my friend.
[02:13]
Lewis J. Gomez
Thank you, pal.
[02:14]
Joe List
Two incredible guests as always, ladies and gentlemen. You know him from Tuesdays with stories. You know him from the regs. Mindful Metal Jacket. Joe and Renan Talk movies. The great Joe List joins the Lewis and Zach show for the first time.
[02:25]
Che Durena
Thanks, everybody. I've quit half of those podcasts.
[02:29]
Joe List
Well, Shannon, what are you doing? Shannon didn't even include the regs on here.
[02:33]
Shannon Lee
She did. She knew that one. I knew you you'd know that one because that's your show.
[02:37]
Joe List
Okay. Yeah, okay.
[02:39]
Zach Amico
Blame.
[02:40]
Shannon Lee
That's one of the only podcasts I listen to that I don't work on.
[02:42]
Che Durena
I love the Rags, that's really sweet. That was a good twist back. That's how you get out of trouble.
[02:48]
Joe List
And from Dark Holes, which is coming to the Gas Digital Network this week. I'm very excited about it. Everyone loves him. Very funny. All over the place. Stand up comedian, hilarious on Instagram, hilarious on Social. The great Che Durena back on the show. How's it going, guys? We're good, we're good. What's up, kid? What's your problem, Joe? What's your.
[03:06]
Che Durena
It was a little noisy. The horns.
[03:08]
Joe List
You don't like the horn? You don't like the air horn?
[03:10]
Che Durena
You know who invented that?
[03:11]
Joe List
Who invented it?
[03:13]
Che Durena
Cypher Sounds.
[03:14]
Joe List
No, he didn't. I'm telling you, he invented the air horn.
[03:18]
Che Durena
Cipher Sounds was the first one. He discovered that lady Rihanna, and she was the first. Did you hear that, Shannon?
[03:25]
Shannon Lee
Yes, that's true.
[03:26]
Che Durena
Someone had to do it first. And who was first was Cypher Sounds.
[03:28]
Joe List
Who said this? Did Cypher Sounds say this?
[03:30]
Che Durena
Yes, his last name is Sounds.
[03:33]
Zach Amico
That's true. He must have invented one or two sounds, I would think.
[03:36]
Che Durena
Google it. Cypha it. He's the guy. He's the. Was it Rihanna that he discovered too.
[03:42]
Joe List
By the way, Shannon, the cameras do look better now.
[03:46]
Che Durena
Ever since Cypher invented that.
[03:47]
Shannon Lee
Yeah, we did have somebody come in and go through all the settings, all the lighting yesterday.
[03:53]
Joe List
Very exciting.
[03:53]
Lewis J. Gomez
There's no way Cypher invented Bam Bam. No way.
[03:58]
Che Durena
Who. Who could it be?
[03:59]
Lewis J. Gomez
It's got to be in like. Let me clear my throat from like the 70s.
[04:03]
Shannon Lee
No, it was him in the. In the 90s on Hot 97 is where it originated from. Cipher Sound.
[04:08]
Zach Amico
It's definitely like a radio DJ move. So I would think a radio DJ started it.
[04:13]
Joe List
We have to pay Cipher every time we use it.
[04:15]
Che Durena
Look it up.
[04:16]
Zach Amico
He should have trademarked the fuck out of that dude.
[04:19]
Joe List
He'd be fucking crushing it right now. Cypher Sounds the man. I like Cypher.
[04:22]
Che Durena
Yeah, I like him too. Zach obviously has some beef with.
[04:25]
Lewis J. Gomez
No, I think he's a nice guy. I just feel like there's no way. Maybe I'm wrong, everybody. Maybe I'm wrong.
[04:30]
Joe List
You're right. Somebody did something for the first time and maybe it was Cypher Sounds.
[04:34]
Che Durena
There's a whole shirt off. I did it before Hogan.
[04:37]
Joe List
There's a whole episode of Skeptic Tank where Cypher goes over it again.
[04:41]
Lewis J. Gomez
He's like, oh, yeah.
[04:41]
Joe List
I remember being in the studio dragging the MP3s back before that was a popular thing. And making the air horns do it three times. And wow. It's a whole. It's good, I'm saying. All right, well, look at that. Look at that.
[04:51]
Che Durena
We're learning every day, guys.
[04:54]
Joe List
That's producer Jorge.
[04:55]
Che Durena
Oh, it looks like a wig and a fake beard.
[04:58]
Joe List
You don't ever need to be on camera. We could just go to the Shannon cam. Even when you're talking. All right, that's fine. We have to. Shannon, did you make the Gofundme yet? Because I'm very serious about the Gofundme for your tits.
[05:09]
Shannon Lee
Oh, I didn't finish making it. I wasn't sure if you were really serious.
[05:11]
Joe List
I'm 100 serious. I'm gonna donate a grand. We're one tenth of the way there.
[05:15]
Zach Amico
We're getting her fake tits.
[05:16]
Joe List
Well, she's got fake tits, but they're 22 years old.
[05:18]
Zach Amico
Oh, we gotta upgrade those tits.
[05:19]
Joe List
They are calcifying in her chest.
[05:21]
Zach Amico
I know.
[05:22]
Joe List
It's like two bowling balls. You gotta to feel her tits. You have to put your fingers inside of.
[05:26]
Che Durena
You're supposed to. You're supposed to replace tits after 10 years.
[05:29]
Joe List
After 10 years, she's two. She's. She needs two pairs of tits.
[05:32]
Zach Amico
Oh, my God, bro. The warranty's blown out on these old tits.
[05:35]
Lewis J. Gomez
Your tits are still sad about 9 11?
[05:40]
Zach Amico
Dude, three 911 tits is crazy.
[05:43]
Che Durena
Sadly, 911 was 24 years ago.
[05:46]
Lewis J. Gomez
They're still sad about them.
[05:48]
Joe List
Yeah, yeah, it was an inside job. It was Shannon's tits. Shannon sits were in the plane.
[05:54]
Che Durena
Well, I'll donate.
[05:55]
Joe List
How much we donate, Joe?
[05:56]
Che Durena
Not a lot. I have a life.
[05:58]
Joe List
I'm throwing in the grand. And she said she's gonna wear low cut, low cut tops from now then this bitch yesterday. This. This is some crazy shit. This is what she said. We were. We were on the bonfire. She didn't say it on the bonfire though. So we're not like repeating stuff. But she was like. But I think there's like other things that I would want to get that like maybe a tummy tuck after I lose a little more weight. So maybe you guys can do that. It's like nobody gives a fuck about your tummy, Shannon.
[06:18]
Che Durena
No tip.
[06:19]
Zach Amico
Focus.
[06:19]
Shannon Lee
Can we do like full like. Like the Swan, that old reality show and just make me a better looking person.
[06:24]
Joe List
We're never going to get there. I don't think we're even. Get to 10,000 do.
[06:27]
Che Durena
I'll put in $100.
[06:29]
Joe List
That's a good.
[06:29]
Zach Amico
I'll match it. I'll match 100 bucks.
[06:31]
Joe List
1200.
[06:33]
Lewis J. Gomez
200.
[06:34]
Joe List
Wow. We're at the 1400 bucks.
[06:36]
Zach Amico
We're already pretty far.
[06:37]
Joe List
But Shannon, I'm talking about every time you're on this show. You have to wear a low cut top. Every time.
[06:42]
Che Durena
One photo of a nipple every day, every morning at 10am she won't be.
[06:46]
Joe List
A pig about it, which is a problem. But I. I think at one point Shannon did admit that she would let me go to Miami with her and she would at least make out with me in a bed.
[06:54]
Zach Amico
Whoa.
[06:55]
Joe List
You said. You said something like that. Shannon, if I'm not mistaken, I remember.
[06:58]
Shannon Lee
Us talking about going to Miami to. To do it.
[07:00]
Joe List
To do it. To do it. Yes. Another $30 iota. Safe as sounds.
[07:07]
Lewis J. Gomez
Yeah, Shannon, you're not vaguely enough of a personality that you can get Dr. Miami to do it for free.
[07:14]
Shannon Lee
I don't. I don't think so.
[07:15]
Zach Amico
Maybe. Yeah, for like, maybe if you do like a little. We get like a little Dr. Miami logo on the Lewis and stuff. Zach, if I like do it pro bono, dude.
[07:25]
Shannon Lee
If I document my process. But like through Lewis's pages, maybe. Because you have way more followers than I do.
[07:31]
Joe List
Yeah, Shannon, sure.
[07:32]
Lewis J. Gomez
Dr. Miami gives a bunch of you whores fucking free surgeries.
[07:35]
Zach Amico
There you go.
[07:36]
Che Durena
I'm up to 125 bucks. But it's two photos a day. 10am, 10pm.
[07:44]
Joe List
Look, we have an incredible show planned today. Skank Fest tickets are going on sale in 42 minutes, folks. The pre sale tickets. So I'm very excited. We're going to be giving away a couple all access passes today on today's show. So let's see. Who the fuck is this? Who the fuck is this? I just got a text message from somebody. Oh, I know who that is. Oh, boy. Yeah. So yeah, we're gonna give away a couple passes. 5, 7, 3 gas line. Not yet. Not yet. Don't call yet. But we're gonna give away a couple all access passes. That's including the Thursday night kickoff party shout out to Yo Kratom for being the marquee sponsor for Skankfest once again. But I'm excited, baby. New Orleans. You like New Orleans show?
[08:22]
Che Durena
I love it. Terrifying. Is it in a nice neighborhood?
[08:27]
Joe List
Stop it.
[08:28]
Che Durena
What neighborhood is it?
[08:29]
Joe List
It's right along the Mississippi River.
[08:31]
Che Durena
Oh boy.
[08:32]
Joe List
I didn't even know the Mississippi river ran through New Orleans. I had no idea.
[08:35]
Zach Amico
I've never been to New Orleans.
[08:36]
Che Durena
Louisiana Purchase.
[08:38]
Joe List
Listen to me, okay? Don't hate on New Orleans.
[08:41]
Che Durena
I love New Orleans.
[08:42]
Joe List
People hate Fremont street and Skankfest. Fremont street was one of the greatest experiences of everyone's lives.
[08:47]
Che Durena
It was awesome. I'm sad that it's leaving. It's the best.
[08:50]
Joe List
You'd rather be back in Vegas?
[08:52]
Che Durena
Well, I mean, I haven't seen this New Orleans, so. Is it all one venue?
[08:55]
Joe List
It's always all one venue. That's it. That's. That's why we can't just drop Skank Fest into any city. It's because it's got to be one venue. Five, six, seven rooms. We got a boxing. We're bringing boxing back. Yes.
[09:06]
Zach Amico
Yes. Dude. What comics need is more head injuries. That's what we need. You might juggle out a couple good bits out of it. Yeah, there's some stuff lost in there that needs to get punched out.
[09:15]
Joe List
Yeah. So we're going to be doing a lot of crazy shit. Lots of surprises, lots of people coming in for the first time. We've already been started booking this year.
[09:21]
Che Durena
So I got to hear. I want it. You can't tease me.
[09:24]
Joe List
No, we're teasing him. Well, we're not. We're not. I'll tell you some people a little bit later.
[09:27]
Che Durena
Huge.
[09:27]
Joe List
Me and Joe are going to lunch after this.
[09:29]
Che Durena
Huge celebrities.
[09:30]
Joe List
Huge. Huge.
[09:31]
Che Durena
Big.
[09:32]
Joe List
Trump's coming.
[09:33]
Che Durena
I think you could get Trump.
[09:35]
Zach Amico
You think Trump would come to Skank Fest?
[09:37]
Joe List
He'll. He'll judge the ass slapping contest.
[09:39]
Che Durena
Dude, I legitimately think he would. I mean, he loves the beauty contest and ufc. He loves Rogan, he loves Hinch. I mean, half the comics at Skank Fest were in the rotunda.
[09:48]
Joe List
Yeah.
[09:50]
Zach Amico
We could do a live deportation, throw.
[09:53]
Joe List
Them in the Mississippi River.
[09:54]
Zach Amico
Yeah.
[09:55]
Joe List
Get out of here.
[09:59]
Che Durena
It might not even be the Mississippi river at that point. Yeah, it could be the Trump River.
[10:02]
Joe List
Yeah.
[10:03]
Zach Amico
Who knows?
[10:03]
Joe List
We're going to lunch after this. Joe. I'm buying. I'm buying you a steak.
[10:06]
Che Durena
All right.
[10:07]
Joe List
Joe wants to make a documentary on my life.
[10:09]
Che Durena
On your life? Skank Fest? Yes.
[10:11]
Joe List
Well, it was my idea to make it Skank Fest. And then you. You wanted to make it about me.
[10:15]
Che Durena
Specifically, but I had the idea also. I just was. I'm afraid of you. I didn't want to bring it up.
[10:19]
Joe List
Not afraid of me anymore.
[10:20]
Che Durena
Joe, at this point, slightly. I don't know. But how are we going to fund it? I just gave away all my money to Shannon's tip.
[10:29]
Joe List
Two things. Number one, Joe's rich. Joe's a. Joe's a fake everyman. It's a new thing in comedy. All these guys get rich and then they're like, oh, I'm just like you.
[10:35]
Che Durena
No, that's by the Way we just were on the regs and you. Someone gave me because I said I made 25 grand on a private gig.
[10:43]
Joe List
Which is not even a lot for a private gig.
[10:45]
Che Durena
No. And it was the punchline cuz I ate my dick. And then everyone goes off on having a financial advisor, which I don't have.
[10:52]
Joe List
Well, you should maybe.
[10:53]
Zach Amico
Yeah, you should probably should. I have a financial advisor. I make that much money.
[10:56]
Joe List
Well, I just signed with a financial advisor.
[10:58]
Lewis J. Gomez
Well, I have a. Louis is my financial advisor and my doctor, as you can tell.
[11:04]
Zach Amico
No, I have.
[11:05]
Che Durena
I have money, but I don't have enough money to fund a movie. I funded a Tom Dust movie. That was 30 grand.
[11:09]
Joe List
You funded that movie yourself?
[11:11]
Che Durena
Yes.
[11:11]
Joe List
You can't fund. Joe, you have 30 grand. I know how much money you have in the bank. You told me.
[11:16]
Che Durena
Yeah. Privately.
[11:17]
Joe List
Yeah. I'm not going to say it, but I know exactly how much money.
[11:20]
Che Durena
You tell me how much money you make in a year and then you believe it. The numbers weren't even.
[11:26]
Zach Amico
They didn't add up.
[11:27]
Che Durena
This guy makes 4 million a year. He has 8 bucks.
[11:29]
Joe List
I don't make that much.
[11:30]
Che Durena
I don't.
[11:30]
Joe List
He's lying about that, folks.
[11:32]
Che Durena
Not a year, a week at SK Fest. You put up the money.
[11:36]
Joe List
How about we split it? We? Oh, dude. We'll do credit card roulette.
[11:39]
Che Durena
What's that?
[11:40]
Joe List
That's where you go to a restaurant and everyone puts their credit card in like a hat. And then you pick out one credit card. That person has to pay the entire bill.
[11:46]
Che Durena
I just paid for a movie and a special.
[11:48]
Joe List
Yeah, we'll get out.
[11:49]
Che Durena
We'll figure.
[11:50]
Joe List
I pay for a special every week.
[11:52]
Che Durena
What do you mean?
[11:52]
Joe List
He's retarded. Thank you, Cypher. Sounds.
[12:00]
Che Durena
But you mentioned. You say. All right, we'll figure it out. It's gonna be awesome. It's gonna be the movie event of the year.
[12:04]
Joe List
It is gonna be the movie of another year. I'm very excited. Yeah, I have a lot going on though. So what? How do you expect it is. You're gonna follow me around? What are you doing?
[12:12]
Che Durena
Well, I can follow you around. We're gonna have a sit down. We'll have a time. Have you watched the Tom Dustin film? No, I'm a send it to you.
[12:17]
Joe List
Save me the Tom Dustin film. All right, we do a sit down. We talk to me.
[12:20]
Che Durena
We talk. Maybe we go to your old house. We talk. We. We interplay.
[12:23]
Joe List
I want to see you go to Patterson, New Jersey.
[12:26]
Che Durena
I'd love to go to Patterson.
[12:27]
Joe List
You do not want to go to Patterson, New Jersey.
[12:28]
Che Durena
Is that bad?
[12:29]
Joe List
Shannon, pull up some images of Patterson, New Jersey. It's one of the worst places on earth.
[12:33]
Lewis J. Gomez
Patterson's inadvisable at best.
[12:36]
Zach Amico
We probably have like a ton. Tons of old footage from Skank Fest and stuff. Yeah, we get, like, switched in and everything.
[12:42]
Che Durena
A lot of stuff.
[12:43]
Zach Amico
Seeing it come together.
[12:44]
Joe List
We go to the corner that my dad was stabbed on to the strip.
[12:46]
Che Durena
Club in Patterson, in Pat Patterson. And there's a table still there.
[12:50]
Joe List
I don't know what. Shannon, we looked it up, right? I don't think it is there anymore.
[12:53]
Lewis J. Gomez
Now, if it was there and you don't go all the time and tell strippers my dad was murdered, I may.
[12:58]
Joe List
I may go to a strip club tonight. I haven't been to a strip club in a hot minute. My son's not with me tonight. I got no here. I'm like, you know what? Let me just go to a strip club and see some titties. You want to go to strip club tonight?
[13:10]
Lewis J. Gomez
No, I gotta go home.
[13:11]
Joe List
Come on, Zach.
[13:13]
Lewis J. Gomez
I really want to go to Harem again.
[13:15]
Joe List
Oh, is that the.
[13:16]
Lewis J. Gomez
The nightmare one by.
[13:18]
Joe List
By me? Yeah, that one. That place is horrible.
[13:20]
Che Durena
Teddy Bar.
[13:21]
Zach Amico
Yeah, they got black eyes and stuff.
[13:23]
Joe List
No black guys allowed.
[13:25]
Che Durena
It's a pit.
[13:26]
Lewis J. Gomez
It's literally a pit.
[13:27]
Zach Amico
A pit.
[13:28]
Lewis J. Gomez
The girls are underneath you.
[13:29]
Zach Amico
Oh, Jesus Christ.
[13:31]
Lewis J. Gomez
Sit around and it's just. It's like a cock fighting pit.
[13:35]
Zach Amico
And they just.
[13:36]
Joe List
They have cowbells on their necks. They're just walking in a circle.
[13:38]
Lewis J. Gomez
They don't dance. They just shamble at you. It's a nightmare.
[13:42]
Zach Amico
And I love it.
[13:43]
Lewis J. Gomez
It's byoba.
[13:44]
Che Durena
Oh, strip club right down the street from my house in Tribeca. Oh, which one is Flash Dancers?
[13:48]
Joe List
Yeah, yeah, that's a good one.
[13:49]
Che Durena
On Murray Street.
[13:50]
Joe List
So you don't want to go to. You don't want to go to a good one. You want to go to kind of a grime ball one where a girl will give you in the bathroom. The. The. The son of a Champagne room. It's a room with this. Yeah. Open to everybody.
[14:01]
Lewis J. Gomez
The curtained off room, the slightly curtained offroom.
[14:04]
Zach Amico
Everything that's going on in there. Yeah, yeah.
[14:07]
Joe List
You're from Canada.
[14:07]
Zach Amico
Oh, yeah.
[14:08]
Joe List
So strip clubs in Canada.
[14:10]
Zach Amico
Oh, we rip way harder than you guys for strip clubs.
[14:12]
Joe List
Yeah. I'm so annoyed because I went to Montreal and I brought a chick with me, and it's like they're all the strip clubs there, and I've never gone to Montreal with any money, and I Was like, oh, I would have. I would have just been a debaucherous piece of.
[14:24]
Zach Amico
Yeah, yeah.
[14:25]
Lewis J. Gomez
Literally Montreal.
[14:27]
Zach Amico
Yeah. You can grab titties there and munch them all.
[14:30]
Joe List
Yeah. Now I know they Curt. They're like, put your hands on my tit. You. Yeah, okay.
[14:34]
Zach Amico
Yeah.
[14:34]
Che Durena
Montreal. That's where I told that story where we used to go up there all the time because I grew up in New England. Would go every few weeks, and we went and got a double dildo, double dong show. And these two Asian women were. They were like, what. What is your name? And I was like, like, Joe. And she's like, oh, Joe, your dick is so small. I'm not into this.
[14:56]
Lewis J. Gomez
Was double dong what they did or the name of the act for two Asians?
[15:02]
Che Durena
I think it was not even both. Yeah, they had a double sided dildo and they. They each other. And then she started making fun of my dick.
[15:08]
Zach Amico
I like how she eyeballed you and was like, this is what he likes.
[15:11]
Che Durena
Yeah. She took the. Me of the four of us, I was the only one with glasses.
[15:14]
Zach Amico
Yeah.
[15:15]
Joe List
Some guys. Some guys do want to be shamed like that. Some guys want to be just. Which. That's not me at all.
[15:19]
Lewis J. Gomez
Your dick's so much smaller than your uncle Foghorn Leghorn.
[15:23]
Joe List
But I also. I also don't want the. To lie to me. Like, if I'm having sex with her, I don't want to be like, oh, your dick's so huge. It was like, shut up. Stop with me now and I'll get in my head. I need her to just be, like, indifferent about it. Yeah, she needs to just lay there.
[15:36]
Zach Amico
You have a dick. I appreciate this dick that you're giving me. That is a dick. Yeah.
[15:41]
Joe List
That is a penis.
[15:42]
Zach Amico
Yes.
[15:42]
Joe List
Thank you very much. Much.
[15:43]
Che Durena
I'm going to Montreal next week. Next weekend.
[15:45]
Joe List
Let me come with you.
[15:46]
Che Durena
Super bowl weekend.
[15:46]
Joe List
Let me come.
[15:47]
Che Durena
All right, come up. Two shows.
[15:51]
Joe List
Let's do it.
[15:52]
Lewis J. Gomez
Is that a good move to do Canada during Super Bowl? Because nobody gives a about football there.
[15:56]
Che Durena
Well, I'm just there Friday. I do two shows Friday, and then Saturday we're going to the Canadiens game off Saturday night. I love a night off on the road. Maybe we'll go, you know, partake in some.
[16:05]
Joe List
A little strip action. Strip club action.
[16:07]
Che Durena
Yeah, maybe.
[16:08]
Joe List
Yeah. Then there's like, what do they call them? New ruin?
[16:11]
Zach Amico
A new massage.
[16:13]
Joe List
Is that what it's called?
[16:13]
Zach Amico
Where the lady, like, oils herself up?
[16:15]
Joe List
Yeah. And she rubs her body on your body? Yeah, yeah. They advertise in the windows that's a. That's a hooker here in the States.
[16:22]
Zach Amico
Yeah.
[16:22]
Joe List
That's illegal.
[16:23]
Zach Amico
Yeah.
[16:23]
Joe List
You go around Montreal, like, you'll just see it advertising the window. New rue massage. Like.
[16:27]
Zach Amico
Oh, well, they're French over there. I'm just doing different.
[16:30]
Che Durena
So. New rue.
[16:31]
Zach Amico
Yeah.
[16:32]
Lewis J. Gomez
N u R U.
[16:33]
Zach Amico
You've never seen like a new rue porn where a girl like, like oils dude up and she's like rubbing all over and then she sucks his dick and stuff? No.
[16:39]
Joe List
Yeah. Is that. Would your wife let you get a new room massage show?
[16:43]
Che Durena
I don't think she wouldn't let him.
[16:44]
Lewis J. Gomez
Get an old R. Yeah.
[16:46]
Che Durena
I don't think she'd be into this.
[16:48]
Zach Amico
Yeah. It's probably crossing the line. Yeah.
[16:50]
Che Durena
So wait, they. They slide across you?
[16:53]
Zach Amico
Yeah, yeah, yeah. With their naked.
[16:55]
Joe List
With their naked body and they.
[16:56]
Che Durena
Are you naked?
[16:56]
Zach Amico
Yeah. Oh, yeah.
[16:57]
Joe List
Yeah. You. They rub their. But I'm sure they're also hookers. I'm sure you could just give them some extra money and they'll just. You.
[17:02]
Che Durena
But couldn't your dick slip in there by accident?
[17:05]
Zach Amico
I guess so.
[17:07]
Che Durena
Wow. All right, I'll. I'll look into new roof.
[17:11]
Zach Amico
Yeah.
[17:11]
Che Durena
Bring up the vacuum cleaner, by the way.
[17:15]
Joe List
Yeah. No, Montreal is a great town. Dude. Montreal is so much fun.
[17:18]
Che Durena
Love Montreal.
[17:19]
Joe List
Yeah, dude. The food, the. The strip clubs. There was a great cigar bar we went to.
[17:24]
Che Durena
Some of the casino's great. Some of the hottest women in Earth too. Which I heard because they used to ship prostitutes over. Yeah. Or whatever. And so they all breeded with the hottest women. Like the hottest percentage of.
[17:34]
Joe List
They are hot. And I. The. The drinking age is 18 in Montreal. Summer when I first started going to Montreal, like, it was literally me, Jay and Dave trying to children. That was it. We're like, let's find some children and go to town.
[17:45]
Zach Amico
Jesus Christ.
[17:46]
Joe List
What is legal there?
[17:48]
Zach Amico
Hey, man. I'm just like. I don't know if I would admit it on a podcast. That's my own thing.
[17:51]
Che Durena
Shannon, could you just grab a shot of me looking really upset? Yeah.
[17:55]
Joe List
On those new cameras. Wow. They look good. Dude, the cameras look way better. Shannon, why wouldn't we get the cameras when we had Nick Mullen on, which is our record breaking episode?
[18:03]
Shannon Lee
Because we were waiting for the guy to come in to make the change.
[18:05]
Joe List
Shannon, can you make the gofundme while we're on the show?
[18:09]
Shannon Lee
I did it just now.
[18:10]
Joe List
Can I see it? Pull it up.
[18:11]
Shannon Lee
I know you're gonna complain about the picture, but I couldn't. The sizing is weird. Unless I just put my Boobs. I feel like they're gonna take it down though.
[18:17]
Joe List
Shannon, you need to show your old boobs. It's $12,000 gold. It's a $10,000 goal. Shannon, she's trying to get extra money.
[18:24]
Shannon Lee
No, no, hold on. Because then there's a medication afterwards and stuff and I don't have health insurance so I'm gonna need a little extra.
[18:30]
Joe List
See, that was a knock on me.
[18:31]
Shannon Lee
No, it's not.
[18:31]
Joe List
She's doing. I understand.
[18:32]
Shannon Lee
It's not though. I'm just saying, like realistically I need to.
[18:35]
Joe List
I wish you put your knockers on me.
[18:37]
Shannon Lee
So I'm scared they're gonna take it down if I put my boobs down.
[18:41]
Joe List
Thank you, cypher. Sounds 12,000.
[18:43]
Zach Amico
Should be a little sexier though. The picture should be like a little.
[18:45]
Joe List
It's not. Shannon, you have hot photos of you.
[18:47]
Shannon Lee
In bikinis, but it's not like it zooms in. So it's only gonna show my face or just my boobs?
[18:52]
Zach Amico
I think just boobs.
[18:53]
Shannon Lee
But they might take it down. I feel like.
[18:55]
Joe List
You think so.
[18:55]
Che Durena
No, I think the face works. Go back to it. Let me see.
[18:59]
Zach Amico
Doesn't work.
[19:00]
Che Durena
I mean, I'm gonna go.
[19:01]
Joe List
Well, why don't you do us like be lying down like on your side?
[19:05]
Shannon Lee
Yeah, I don't have one of those.
[19:06]
Joe List
You don't have.
[19:07]
Shannon Lee
Oh, I might, I might, I might. Hold on, let me look.
[19:09]
Che Durena
Well, we all have phone cameras.
[19:10]
Zach Amico
Yeah. We can get this done.
[19:12]
Joe List
Come lay across the table right now and we'll take a picture of you. A hot sexy photo.
[19:15]
Shannon Lee
Too fat. I can't be sexy right now.
[19:17]
Joe List
You're not fat.
[19:19]
Shannon Lee
I do have a picture on a boat for my birthday last year.
[19:21]
Che Durena
I'm gonna find it.
[19:23]
Shannon Lee
Stay tuned, guys.
[19:24]
Joe List
Stay tuned folks. We're going to share this. What is the URL for the GoFundMe Shannon?
[19:29]
Shannon Lee
It's a crazy URL, but it's help Shannon Lee replace her boobs.
[19:32]
Joe List
Help Shannon leave. Replace her boobs. But if you just search.
[19:35]
Shannon Lee
Just search that and GoFundMe.
[19:36]
Joe List
Help Shannon Lee replace her boobs. On GoFundMe. We're going to do this every week and we're going to just keep track of how much it goes up.
[19:44]
Che Durena
Now this is GoFundMe is different than the other one where you get paid. You get something back. You get an autograph shirt or something.
[19:51]
Shannon Lee
Kickstarter.
[19:52]
Che Durena
Kickstarter.
[19:53]
Joe List
Kickstarter would be better than the highest. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
[19:58]
Che Durena
Do tit starter. Because that way when they get a photo or whatever.
[20:01]
Joe List
Yeah, well, what about that. Would you give everyone a signed bikini photo or just with your tits in it if they donate?
[20:10]
Che Durena
Or a pube. You could smell a pube for 300 bucks.
[20:14]
Zach Amico
Socks.
[20:15]
Lewis J. Gomez
Worn socks.
[20:16]
Che Durena
Worn socks. Yeah.
[20:17]
Shannon Lee
Such a whole thing.
[20:18]
Zach Amico
But you're making.
[20:20]
Che Durena
You're going to make the money that way. No one's got to just give you money for Shannon.
[20:24]
Joe List
Grow out your bush and give everyone who donates over 501 pube. That's a great thing. And that's. Why are you so gay? What is your problem? That's actually a great idea. There's nothing to you. You don't care about your pubes. You probably don't even have any.
[20:37]
Shannon Lee
I don't have any.
[20:38]
Che Durena
Grow them out.
[20:39]
Joe List
Hold on. Do me fair. Put on sexy music and talk to me about what? You talk to me about how you.
[20:42]
Shannon Lee
Keep your vagina hairless.
[20:45]
Joe List
Hairless like a cat?
[20:47]
Shannon Lee
Yes.
[20:48]
Che Durena
No allergens.
[20:50]
Joe List
Do you shave it or do you wax it?
[20:53]
Shannon Lee
I shave it. Unless I'm going on, like, a tropical vacation somewhere like Jamaica. Yeah.
[20:57]
Joe List
So you're gonna wax for Jamaica.
[20:59]
Shannon Lee
Yeah. Because then if you keep shaving, it becomes gross.
[21:01]
Joe List
Yeah, you don't want to be all stubbly and up down there. Looks like Joe's face, huh?
[21:07]
Zach Amico
Do you have any gray pubes?
[21:09]
Shannon Lee
No.
[21:09]
Joe List
Oh, you like that?
[21:11]
Shannon Lee
Thanks for calling me old Jay.
[21:13]
Che Durena
Yeah, give me the gray pube.
[21:15]
Joe List
What if it's all gray down there like her? Suppose he was scared or petrified.
[21:18]
Lewis J. Gomez
Oh, I can smell the dead.
[21:20]
Che Durena
He's got David lynch down there. I love it.
[21:26]
Joe List
Yeah, I'm excited about this. Everyone in the race live chat's gonna donate, right, guys? Bikini Shannon poster would be dope. There's no way. There's no way I'd give money to something about Shannon. Her looks like the witch from Snow White. That's funny. Let's see. Homophobic says when she gets them, she'll be tempted to show us. Shannon's gonna. Shannon. Can I make another stipulation if we get to the 12,000? Because that's more money. Now let's see.
[21:59]
Lewis J. Gomez
Manipulation.
[22:00]
Joe List
You have to wear a. Not only a shirt that's low cup, but no bra. Like, we want to see nip through the shirt every day, though. What'd you say? Not every day, but once in a while.
[22:13]
Shannon Lee
Once in a while.
[22:14]
Joe List
On the. Oh, on the Friday exclusive episodes, it'll be br. Fridays.
[22:18]
Shannon Lee
Okay.
[22:18]
Che Durena
Yeah.
[22:20]
Joe List
Okay. Let's take a quick moment and thank Mando for supporting today's show. We love Mando here on the show because we're Stinky bastards. If you listen to this show, any gas digital shows we know, number one, you probably stink. Number two, you probably have a lot of extra places that you could use deodorant because this is not deodorant just for your armpits, but this is total body deodorant.
[22:36]
Lewis J. Gomez
That's right. It's not just for there. It's for your pits, balls, thigh folds, belly buttons, butt cracks and feet of which I have all of those things. It was developed by a doctor who understands that normal body odor shouldn't be a source of embarrassment or misdiagnosis. Mando is clinically proven to block odor all day and control it for up to 72 hours. Whether you choose the solid stick, the aluminum free deodorant spray, it's all perfect for those hard to reach areas.
[23:03]
Joe List
And you know this deodorant is cruelty free, dye free, paraben free. I don't know what parabens are, but they seem like they're really bad for you. So don't, don't get any parabens in your life. They have an incredible deal here. All you gotta do is go to shopmando.com that's shopmando.com and you get the starter pack. The starter pack is perfect for you if you've never tried their products and includes the solid stick deodorant, a cream tube deodorant and two products of your choice like the mini body wash or the deodorant wipes, which are a real game changer if you're traveling or if you just want to get a quick freshen up. Guess what? Grab those wipes. Wipe your balls, wipe your pits, wipe wherever you want. And you smell great. We're going to save you five bucks off your starter pack. That is 40% off. Go to shopmando.com use that promo code lazy. And we got you covered. All right, where were we? I'm getting excited. That's a real smile. That's a real smile.
[23:50]
Zach Amico
You guys got.
[23:50]
Lewis J. Gomez
It's free hang Fridays.
[23:52]
Zach Amico
Yeah. You guys got good old school sexual harassment here.
[23:55]
Joe List
Yeah.
[23:56]
Che Durena
Yeah.
[23:56]
Zach Amico
It feels like the 80s.
[23:57]
Joe List
Yeah, it's fine. It rules. Yeah. We're living like it's 96, baby. That's it.
[24:02]
Zach Amico
We need like a corner office with like an oak table and just cocaine on it. Making deals, dude.
[24:06]
Lewis J. Gomez
Oak table with the glass top.
[24:08]
Zach Amico
Yeah, dude. Fuck yeah.
[24:10]
Joe List
Those are the good old days.
[24:11]
Che Durena
I saw Baby girl last night. Night. Have you seen it? I think you'd like.
[24:14]
Joe List
It was Baby girl.
[24:15]
Che Durena
Baby girl's Nicole Kidman is like a 22 year old guy and he's like. He makes her a slave. He's like, get on your knees. He makes her eat milk off a tray like a dog. She's nude. And he fingers her.
[24:26]
Joe List
It's a new movie.
[24:28]
Che Durena
You see her tits. You see her everything. She's got nice ass.
[24:31]
Joe List
She did another. She did another movie where she like a teenager. What was back in the day? Because I would. I beat my dick to that one. It was. She was like a teacher and then she like. It's like a murders type mystery maybe.
[24:43]
Zach Amico
I think she. She's the teenager. But there's also. Isn't there a lady who's in love with her too? But she's not in love with the lady. Isn't there like some sort of love triangle?
[24:50]
Joe List
There's something going on. She was a teacher.
[24:52]
Zach Amico
Yeah.
[24:52]
Joe List
There's Nicole Kidman as a teacher.
[24:56]
Che Durena
She's naked.
[24:57]
Joe List
Yeah, I believe she is naked.
[24:58]
Lewis J. Gomez
Not Eyes Wide Shut, right?
[24:59]
Joe List
No, no, no.
[25:00]
Che Durena
Eyes Wide show is another sexy one.
[25:02]
Joe List
I need another coffee. Shannon, what the was it. It was a true. It was based on a true story as well.
[25:07]
Che Durena
Oh, to die for.
[25:10]
Joe List
To die for. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Nicole Kidman was. She was pretty hot. She's still hot. Can we see her now? Can we see a scene from Baby Girl? Let's see her naked body.
[25:22]
Che Durena
Watch the tr. Even the trailer is hot.
[25:24]
Joe List
Yeah.
[25:24]
Che Durena
She's a young boy. I was hard as a rock in the theater. Oh, my God. I was ready to, you know, jerk off. And then a woman. I could have used you. There was a girl that kept scrolling on her phone in front of me and I said, could you put your phone away? It's distracting and rude. And she gave me the finger.
[25:41]
Joe List
Like you said, it's rude though. Yeah, well, if you said it's rude that you. You're. That's a little more. You could have just said it's distracting and gotten this the same effect. When you throw a rude in there.
[25:49]
Che Durena
That deserves a you. It is rude. It's obnoxious. It's against the rules too.
[25:54]
Joe List
Don't even talk to me about rules, okay? I live my life trying to create justice all the time. And you know, there's no rhyme or reason. By the way, lifetime. Some of them say no sneakers in the steam room and sauna. Some of them don't have that sign posted.
[26:09]
Che Durena
Sneakers in a sauna.
[26:10]
Joe List
I can't say the N word because Chase here, it's not black people. It's ignorant people.
[26:19]
Lewis J. Gomez
They Wear very clean sneakers in a sauna.
[26:22]
Che Durena
Whoa, Jesus.
[26:24]
Joe List
Thank you, Cypher. He also.
[26:27]
Che Durena
I mean, sneakers in the steam room's insane.
[26:31]
Zach Amico
It's gonna stink up the whole steam room.
[26:33]
Joe List
You're dragging mud from outside, from the gym floor. Germs, sweat. And it gets. It gets all muddy and up. Oh, it makes me so angry.
[26:41]
Che Durena
And your sneakers are wet now.
[26:42]
Joe List
Yeah. I had a day the other day. Did I talk about on the show? Not only it was the sneakers, it was a cucumber and a guy holding the door open.
[26:47]
Zach Amico
Wait, what?
[26:48]
Joe List
All at once? All at once. I was in a sauna at Lifetime, which I paid 350amonth for. And there was a guy pulling a bag of vegetables. He starts eating a cucumber like it's an apple.
[26:56]
Che Durena
That's crazy.
[26:57]
Joe List
And then another guy just has his sneakers on. He's kind of pacing back and forth. I'm watching the mud come shoes. And then another guy's having a conversation with his friend. He goes to leave and he holds the door open. He's still talking to his friend. Ah, it was crazy, dude. Yeah, this was sauna. I go to steam, 15 minutes, give a nice glaze. Then I go in the sauna and I. I scroll on my phone.
[27:15]
Che Durena
Yeah, that's obnoxious too.
[27:16]
Joe List
Scrolling on your phone in the sauna.
[27:18]
Che Durena
Yes.
[27:18]
Zach Amico
That's okay. You're not bothering anyone.
[27:20]
Che Durena
It's bothering me. Why is it bothering Place?
[27:23]
Joe List
Yeah, but I'm not making. I'm not like listening to.
[27:25]
Lewis J. Gomez
Yeah, but they're not in your eyeline.
[27:27]
Che Durena
I guess movies lit up.
[27:29]
Lewis J. Gomez
Somebody's in your eyeline.
[27:30]
Che Durena
That's true, but still, I mean. Get out of here. We're medit. Meditating in here.
[27:34]
Joe List
Well, that's. You can be meditating. You don't have to be meditating.
[27:37]
Che Durena
It should be meditative at least.
[27:39]
Joe List
No, I understand that. It needs to be a quiet Zen place. I actually went to an amazing. Oh, dude, I'll send it to you. This Nordic spa in Montreal. Awesome.
[27:48]
Che Durena
I gotta go.
[27:49]
Joe List
Awesome. And. But they had a rule that there's no speaking on the entire floor, ever. On the back of all the staff shirts, it says quiet, please. It has a face like that.
[27:58]
Zach Amico
I like that.
[27:59]
Joe List
Like it's just everyone walking around in silence. And if people are whispering, the staff like.
[28:03]
Che Durena
So what does it mean? Nordic?
[28:04]
Joe List
It's. Or it's called Scandinav Spa. I'll send you the info. Dude, it was. It was awesome. We got a massage.
[28:10]
Che Durena
What happens? What goes on?
[28:12]
Joe List
They have a steam. They have a sauna. They have, like, a hot. A big, giant, like, warm bath.
[28:16]
Lewis J. Gomez
They rape you. You can't tell anyone.
[28:19]
Joe List
They have an ice bath. They have. They have.
[28:22]
Che Durena
Can I go like this? No. That's how I think.
[28:26]
Joe List
My balls. My balls. My balls. I hate a cold bath.
[28:30]
Che Durena
It's not fun.
[28:31]
Joe List
I hate it.
[28:31]
Che Durena
Yeah.
[28:32]
Joe List
I mean, if you go for. It does reset your body after. If you're steaming and doing the sauna, then you're like, all right, just dip in real quick. It just resets everything. You go back in the steam room.
[28:39]
Zach Amico
Yeah, you need it. You need it. It's like. And it just makes you feel good. It gets you jacked up.
[28:43]
Joe List
Scandinav, I think it was called. It was. It was awesome.
[28:46]
Che Durena
All right.
[28:47]
Joe List
It was really cool. And then there was like. But don't see. I up. Because you get to spend the whole day in, like, that spire if you get a massage. And I up. Up. Like, the girl that I was hanging with, she doesn't like, like, steam and sauna. And so it's like, very quickly, we, like, gotta. You can go the whole days. Bring a book, dude. You can literally just sit there the whole day. They have, like, beds everywhere. It's really cool.
[29:07]
Che Durena
All right.
[29:08]
Zach Amico
So she didn't want to stay. She was like, let's get out of here.
[29:10]
Che Durena
She wanted to.
[29:12]
Joe List
She just had lip fillers, so she couldn't go in the steam room for too long.
[29:15]
Zach Amico
Her face would have melted.
[29:16]
Joe List
Yeah.
[29:16]
Lewis J. Gomez
No, not her face.
[29:22]
Joe List
Yeah.
[29:22]
Zach Amico
Ma'am, you dropped your.
[29:24]
Joe List
She's like, I'm not supposed to go in the. The steam room with my lip filler. So I can only go in for a few minutes. And I was like, that's the whole reason I came.
[29:30]
Che Durena
Scandinav.
[29:31]
Joe List
Scandinav.
[29:31]
Che Durena
All right. I gotta get a newbie and a Scandinav.
[29:34]
Joe List
No, new room.
[29:36]
Che Durena
That's what it is. Yeah.
[29:37]
Joe List
New room, massage and a skin. Go to Scandinavia. It was great. I want to go with you to Montreal, doggy.
[29:41]
Che Durena
Come up next week.
[29:43]
Joe List
I'm in. I'm somewhere else. All right, I'm in. I'm in Canada, though, though. Oh, Winnipeg. Way nicer area.
[29:51]
Zach Amico
Winnipeg's the butthole of Canada, for sure.
[29:53]
Joe List
Yeah. Yeah. I've been there before. I don't remember. I don't. I typically want to go on the road. I just stay in my hotel.
[29:59]
Zach Amico
Yeah.
[29:59]
Joe List
Unless I'm, like, with somebody. And so I don't really know what it's like to visit any places. Montreal, we went out a bunch.
[30:05]
Che Durena
Do you do rumors?
[30:06]
Joe List
Yeah, rumors.
[30:07]
Zach Amico
Yeah, rumors. It's a Good club.
[30:08]
Joe List
Great club.
[30:09]
Zach Amico
Yeah. But what's it called? Winnipeg is the racism capital of Canada and the stabbing capital of Canada. Canada.
[30:14]
Joe List
Okay. Wow.
[30:15]
Zach Amico
Yeah.
[30:16]
Joe List
That's why they're racist.
[30:17]
Zach Amico
Yeah, yeah.
[30:18]
Joe List
Keep on getting stabbed by brown people.
[30:19]
Zach Amico
And they also have the Museum of Human Rights if you want to check out something.
[30:23]
Joe List
That's just hilarious. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
[30:24]
Zach Amico
They got a lot of. Up there.
[30:26]
Joe List
Yeah. But we'll. We'll see. I'm. I'm excited to go back to Canada's great, dude. A lot of fans in Canada.
[30:31]
Che Durena
Of course.
[30:31]
Joe List
Ottawa was wild.
[30:32]
Che Durena
I know. Someone just reached out to me from Ottawa.
[30:34]
Joe List
I'm gonna try Ottawa. Is it the Laugh Lounge?
[30:37]
Che Durena
I don't know.
[30:38]
Joe List
It was awesome.
[30:40]
Zach Amico
That's Nick Burden's room.
[30:41]
Joe List
I don't know.
[30:42]
Zach Amico
Or Nick Beaton. It's the one where it's like low lighting, a little candles on the table.
[30:46]
Joe List
Yeah. You go downstairs.
[30:47]
Zach Amico
Yeah, that. That's.
[30:48]
Joe List
That room rules.
[30:49]
Zach Amico
Yeah, that room does. Really? So a buddy of mine, I mean, I'm. I'm Canadian, so I know those guys up there.
[30:53]
Joe List
Yeah. Very cool.
[30:54]
Che Durena
Where are you from?
[30:55]
Zach Amico
I'm from, like, Vancouver. Ish area. Maybe like an outside hour outside of Vancouver.
[30:58]
Che Durena
Lovely. Yeah.
[30:59]
Joe List
Yeah. 573 gas line. We're gonna give away a pair of all access passes. They're going on sale in 20 minutes. This is including the Thursday night kick golf party. Two passes to the fifth caller. Fifth caller. Shannon put each caller through so we could tell them they did not win.
[31:12]
Che Durena
Oh, this going to be fun.
[31:13]
Joe List
Oh, yeah. 573 gas. I can put up on the screen if you want so people can see it.
[31:17]
Lewis J. Gomez
She did. She took it back.
[31:19]
Che Durena
The show's live.
[31:19]
Joe List
Yeah, we're live right now.
[31:21]
Che Durena
Holy.
[31:21]
Joe List
We're live, baby boy.
[31:22]
Che Durena
Oh, my God. This is scary.
[31:23]
Joe List
You didn't know that?
[31:24]
Che Durena
No, no.
[31:25]
Joe List
I know very few shows go live anymore.
[31:27]
Che Durena
No. Remember Rogan used to be live. That's so crazy.
[31:30]
Joe List
Yeah.
[31:30]
Che Durena
That's insane.
[31:31]
Joe List
Why is it insane?
[31:32]
Che Durena
Insane because you say something, you want.
[31:35]
Joe List
To edit it out. Yeah. That's why people subscribe to Yesterday. They're waiting for us to say the thing that we can't edit out. Shannon flashed Big J's phone number on the screen the other day by accident.
[31:43]
Che Durena
Whoa.
[31:44]
Joe List
It was insanity.
[31:45]
Che Durena
Did it?
[31:46]
Shannon Lee
Crisis averted.
[31:47]
Joe List
Yeah, crisis averted.
[31:48]
Shannon Lee
I changed the picture.
[31:50]
Joe List
Wait, let's see.
[31:51]
Che Durena
Oh, here we go.
[31:53]
Shannon Lee
Hold on.
[31:53]
Che Durena
So this could be her tits, like as we're waiting here. This could be Shannon's tits. Okay, that's good.
[32:01]
Joe List
Bad Shannon.
[32:02]
Che Durena
I would crop it so it's closer, though.
[32:03]
Joe List
Yeah. Go a little closer to you, girl. What does it say? Let me, let me. What does it say, Shannon? You read it.
[32:09]
Shannon Lee
Hi, I'm Shannon Lee, producer and podcast host at Gas Digital Network. As you might know, my boobs are over 22 years old and I'm looking to get them replaced and appreciate any help.
[32:18]
Joe List
I would be disappointed if I got a stripper. That was your tits. Age. Like too old. Come on, bring on a younger one.
[32:25]
Zach Amico
It sounds like something about adopting an.
[32:27]
Joe List
Old dog or something.
[32:34]
Che Durena
22.
[32:35]
Joe List
Yeah.
[32:35]
Lewis J. Gomez
You're like.
[32:35]
Joe List
When you adopt an old dog, you're like, I'm just. I'm giving it a nice comfortable life for the next. Yeah.
[32:40]
Lewis J. Gomez
So buying Shannon's tits like a cheeseburger.
[32:43]
Zach Amico
Yeah.
[32:43]
Lewis J. Gomez
Let it have a picnic on a blanket.
[32:45]
Joe List
Exactly.
[32:46]
Zach Amico
Only a few days left, boy.
[32:48]
Che Durena
So what can happen if you don't get them replaced? Like, can you get sick and die? Because you might want to add that in there. Or do they just get to be gross to tits?
[32:55]
Shannon Lee
I think they just get to be gross.
[32:57]
Joe List
Can you look it up? Shannon? What? H. What's the worst case scenario for having 22 year old tits?
[33:00]
Che Durena
Because you should lie and just say it could cause infection and life saving.
[33:03]
Zach Amico
This is a life saving surgery.
[33:05]
Che Durena
Exactly. I need this or else I'm going to have, you know, AIDS or whatever.
[33:08]
Lewis J. Gomez
Yeah, they're taking time bombs.
[33:12]
Shannon Lee
I have the first caller if you're ready.
[33:13]
Joe List
All right, good. 573 gas line. Here we go. What's your name? Where you calling from? This is Josh Copeland. I'm out of Vegas, bro. Hell yeah, Josh. You did not win, okay? Fuck yeah. You guys rock, man. You didn't win. You did, but you didn't. Oh, you don't care. You just want to say hi. Hell yeah, dude. Well, you keep on calling back. It's fine. Take it easy, my friend. And congratulations for stopping drinking. I drank the other night. I went to a sushi spot and I had. I'm not a Joe. I can have a drink on a special occasion.
[33:51]
Che Durena
Okay.
[33:52]
Joe List
Yeah. Next one's got the sake. The sake tasting with it. Oh, so good. Saki saki. That's gonna be you next weekend.
[33:59]
Shannon Lee
Number four is on now.
[34:01]
Joe List
Number four, what's your name? Where are you calling from? Yo, what up?
[34:05]
Che Durena
It's Pike.
[34:05]
Joe List
I'm down in Florida. Pike, you are not the winner, but thank you for calling, my friend. God damn it. I love the disappointment. 573 gas line. We're giving it away to the fifth caller live on the Show a pair of all access passes to Skank Fest New Orleans. VIP passes, including the kickoff party with a special musical guest, which we're not saying yet, but it's now. It's narrowed down between two different acts right now.
[34:30]
Shannon Lee
No, the next one's up. This is three.
[34:31]
Joe List
What's your name? Where you call him?
[34:34]
Zach Amico
Hey, it's Ludy from Ohio.
[34:36]
Joe List
Ludy, guess what? You are the fifth caller. Shut up. I'm kidding.
[34:43]
Che Durena
That's me.
[34:44]
Joe List
Thank you, Cypher Sand.
[34:45]
Che Durena
That was me. Because you actually lied. You didn't even do like a twisty thing. You just straight up lied to him. That's horrible. Well, congrats on Ohio State. Were you Ohio State's fan, sir?
[34:57]
Shannon Lee
Next one's here.
[34:58]
Joe List
Oh, what's your name? Where are you calling from, my friend?
[35:01]
Lewis J. Gomez
He hate me.
[35:02]
Joe List
507. Oh, he hate me. I love. He hit me from the racist live chat. He hate me. Guess what? What's up? You're calling number four. You just missed it, my friend.
[35:15]
Che Durena
It's for the best. It's in New Orleans this year.
[35:17]
Joe List
Stop saying that. Everyone loves New Orleans. All right, whatever. You guys rule. Yeah. Hell yeah. You're the man, doggy. The next caller is a winner.
[35:26]
Che Durena
This is exciting. Excited?
[35:27]
Joe List
It's exciting.
[35:29]
Lewis J. Gomez
I bet it's a guy.
[35:32]
Che Durena
No way. It's gonna be a hot chick.
[35:35]
Joe List
What's your name? Where are you calling from?
[35:37]
Zach Amico
This is Cuckle Snake from the rlc.
[35:40]
Joe List
What's your name?
[35:41]
Zach Amico
Cuckle Snake.
[35:42]
Joe List
Cuckle Snake from the rlc. Well, guess what, Cuckle Snake?
[35:46]
Zach Amico
What's that?
[35:48]
Joe List
You just won two all access passes to Skank Fest.
[35:54]
Zach Amico
Sure.
[35:57]
Joe List
He doesn't believe me. You really did do. Dude.
[36:00]
Lewis J. Gomez
Yeah, you're number five, dude.
[36:01]
Joe List
You're number five. I swear to God.
[36:04]
Zach Amico
Yeah, well, you just canceled number. All right.
[36:08]
Che Durena
Really?
[36:09]
Joe List
I'm just kidding. I'm just kidding. You didn't win. Haha.
[36:12]
Zach Amico
Haha. Yeah, I figured.
[36:13]
Joe List
No, I'm kidding. You did win though. You won. Be more excited about it or I'm gonna have Shannon hang up on you.
[36:20]
Che Durena
For real?
[36:21]
Joe List
Yeah, for real.
[36:22]
Che Durena
What's the rlc? I kind of believe it now.
[36:26]
Joe List
Yeah, you're really the winner. Cuckle Snake. Snake. It's the racist live chat. That's the rlc. Okay, cool. Well, yeah, look, we're gonna put you on with Shannon right now. Shannon, do me a favor. When you take his information, do it in a very sexy voice and let him jerk off a little bit to your voice. Is that okay?
[36:40]
Lewis J. Gomez
That was the completion. Just a few tugs.
[36:42]
Joe List
Yeah, just a little Maintenance stroke.
[36:43]
Che Durena
Can we ask other questions? Who are you most excited to see? Do you like Joe List? What's my best special? Aren't I the most underrated comic?
[36:50]
Joe List
Have you been to Skank Fest before?
[36:53]
Zach Amico
Yeah, I have been. I was actually at the Las Vegas and I was at Gang Fest out.
[36:58]
Joe List
I have a picture with Shannon actually from Vegas. Wow. There we go. Cocklesnake. And I bet you. I bet you're very attractive, too. You know what? I'm not bad. Hell yeah, dude.
[37:11]
Zach Amico
But I wouldn't say I'm attractive.
[37:13]
Joe List
Where do you live?
[37:15]
Zach Amico
I actually live in confidence.
[37:18]
Joe List
Well, you know what?
[37:19]
Zach Amico
Tupelo, Mississippi. So birthplace of the King Elvis Presley.
[37:22]
Joe List
Hell yeah. All right, Dougie. Well, listen, you just won. I'm very happy for you. I'm glad that you've been to Skank Fest before. Were you planning on buying the tickets today?
[37:31]
Zach Amico
Actually, my budget's been really tight, so.
[37:35]
Joe List
I'm not losing money. Well, every time I give it away to somebody that was going to buy them, I'm like, I'm actually losing money. So that pisses me off. But I'm happy that you get to go. Congratulations, my friend. We're going to put you on with Shannon right now. Shannon, speak sexy to him, please. Let's take a quick moment and thank Small Batch Cigar for supporting today's show. We love Small Batch Cigar here at the Lewis and Zach show. I just smoked a cigar a couple days ago, my friend. Friend.
[37:57]
Lewis J. Gomez
Yes, you did, Louis.
[38:00]
Joe List
They really are an incredible company. If you guys want to get cigars, you got to get them online. It's better than going to a smoke shop. You have an incredible selection, all the award winning cigars that you know and love and there's probably a bunch that you don't know. They have a new section that a lot of people go to the first time they visit the site and they. That's the best way to discover new brands that you might not know. But here's the best part of everything. They got free shipping. It delivers in two to three days in the continental United States. States. And it comes with Boveda packs with every single order. So your cigars say super fresh and humid.
[38:28]
Lewis J. Gomez
That is true. They have the most thorough, thorough packaging in the industry with an amazing selection of rare, limited and hard to find cigars. And you earn 5% reward points instantly. All you got to do is go to smallbatch cigar.com today and they have a deal for you. Louis, I understand you just had a cigar recently.
[38:46]
Joe List
I did have a cigar recently. I Don't know if you knew that, Joe, but whatever your name is, I use that promo code, GAS10. You're gonna get 10 off, plus those 5% rewards points. Why not go there and support the show? Get some cigars, Keep them in your house. Even if you don't smoke cigars, there's nothing classier than your friends come over like, hey, you guys want a cigar? I got a whole bunch of cigars. This is the way to do it. Small batch, cigar, dot com. All right, where were we? Very cool.
[39:09]
Che Durena
That's exciting. Hey, what has four eyes and can't see? Mississippi. M I, S, S. I know.
[39:20]
Joe List
M I, S, S, I S, S.
[39:21]
Che Durena
I. P, P, I. Yeah, four eyes, I can't see.
[39:24]
Lewis J. Gomez
Yeah, well, it's round on the end, high in the middle.
[39:26]
Che Durena
I don't know.
[39:27]
Lewis J. Gomez
Ohio.
[39:28]
Joe List
Ooh. What do you call a black guy that flies an airplane? Sorry.
[39:34]
Che Durena
She wins.
[39:38]
Joe List
Oh, what's your. My favorite street joke ever? I like that.
[39:43]
Che Durena
You were gonna ask me, but then.
[39:44]
Joe List
Just no, I decided I want to hear. I don't want to hear your horseshit. He's gonna say some faggy.
[39:48]
Che Durena
My.
[39:49]
Joe List
My favorite street joke ever is. I was like, why do Indian women have the red dot on their forehead?
[39:54]
Che Durena
Why?
[39:55]
Joe List
Because people keep on going up, them being like, you are so fucking ugly. Jesus Christ.
[39:59]
Che Durena
Terrible. Not only is that a terrible joke, also, you're abusing your friend.
[40:03]
Joe List
It's good. He's got. He's got a lot of forehead fat. He barely felt that. That woke him up. Actually, Zach was starting to fall asleep. I just woke him up. That's a great joke. Go do that to Indian people. People.
[40:15]
Zach Amico
Yeah, they know that's.
[40:16]
Lewis J. Gomez
They.
[40:16]
Zach Amico
They actually wrote it.
[40:17]
Joe List
I used to do it to Indian girls in my school when I was in high school.
[40:21]
Che Durena
Oh, wow. I never heard that joke.
[40:23]
Zach Amico
Yeah, it's a great one, I think. I don't know if that's a joke. I think it's just. He was abusing people, being like, yeah, it's a bit guys. It's fun.
[40:31]
Che Durena
Yeah. I've seen an attractive Indian woman one time.
[40:34]
Joe List
Yeah.
[40:36]
Lewis J. Gomez
And there's a. I, I, I. There's a. A version of that joke I like better. Why do women have indie women have the red dot on their forehead?
[40:44]
Zach Amico
Why?
[40:44]
Lewis J. Gomez
So when they get married, their husband can scratch it off and find out if they own a gas station or a convenience store.
[40:49]
Che Durena
Oh, my God.
[40:51]
Joe List
What's your favorite fine job? Tell us yours.
[40:54]
Che Durena
Okay. I know you've got skunks. Does it take to stink up a room how many? A few.
[41:01]
Zach Amico
Ah, let's see.
[41:02]
Che Durena
That's a little more wholehearted. That's nice.
[41:04]
Joe List
You know, that didn't get me going when I was a kid, though. I needed, like, death. I needed violence. I needed, like, dead baby jokes, rape jokes.
[41:11]
Che Durena
What about the two gay guys? And they say. The guy says, let's spice up our sex life. I'll hide, and if you find me, I'll blow you. And he goes, okay, sounds good. He goes, great. I'll be behind the couch.
[41:23]
Joe List
What's your favorite? What's a Canadian street joke?
[41:25]
Zach Amico
My favorite one is, why do girls wear makeup and perfume? Because they're ugly and they stink.
[41:30]
Joe List
That's a good one.
[41:30]
Zach Amico
Yeah, I like that one a lot. Yeah.
[41:32]
Joe List
Pretty solid. Yeah.
[41:33]
Che Durena
What about the guy, the two gay guys in the shower? You know that one?
[41:36]
Joe List
No. You know a lot of gay guy jokes?
[41:38]
Che Durena
Well, I'm a gay man. There's two gay guys in the shower. Then the phone's ringing and the guy says, hey, I gotta go get the phone. He goes, whatever you do, don't come until I get back. I want you come. And he goes. He takes the call. He talks to his mother. Whatever sells her, he loves it comes back and there's come all over the shower.
[41:53]
Joe List
I know the punchline on the shower. I wanna. I wanna steal it so badly. I wanted to take this punchline.
[41:57]
Che Durena
I told you not to come. He said, I didn't. I farted.
[41:59]
Joe List
Yeah.
[42:00]
Zach Amico
Yeah, that's.
[42:02]
Che Durena
That's fun.
[42:02]
Zach Amico
That's great. That's great.
[42:04]
Joe List
It's a good one.
[42:05]
Lewis J. Gomez
Guy walks up to a hot tub and there's two gay guys in it sitting, and they're pushing a turd back and forth. And guy goes, you guys are disgusting. Go.
[42:11]
Joe List
What?
[42:11]
Lewis J. Gomez
We're teaching our baby how to swim.
[42:14]
Joe List
Maybe we'll. Before the end of the show, we'll do a. We'll have somebody call him with a street joke. If it makes us laugh, they win. Skank Fest passes. That's good. That's a solid, solid little contest we're having here. Go ahead.
[42:26]
Zach Amico
Oh, sorry.
[42:26]
Joe List
No, please.
[42:27]
Zach Amico
And there's like three. Cruise ship crashes, there's a white dude, black dude, Indian dude, they're all floating in the water. Shark comes, eats the white dude. And he and black dude are scared. Shark comes, eats the black dude. Indian dude scared. Shark comes, swims away, and he goes, oh, God, why do you save me? And the shark's like, I ate one of you last week and my asshole's still burning.
[42:46]
Joe List
All right, let's do some Plugs real quick. We're cruising. Dude. This is 40 minutes into the show.
[42:50]
Che Durena
Oh, wow. Jesus.
[42:51]
Joe List
Time flies when you're having fun, boys. Jealous? What are you plugging, my friend?
[42:56]
Che Durena
Well, Montreal, February 7th. Wilbur Theater in Boston, April 19th. Of course, the Regs podcast. The best podcast in the goddamn sky. Tuesdays with stories with Mark Norman. And check out my Punch Up Live page. All my dates are on there. Tickets, my email list, all that stuff.
[43:13]
Joe List
Sick.
[43:14]
Zach Amico
Jay, check out my podcast, Dark Holes with Che Durena. We're always looking at weird, obscure Internet bullshit. Also, I'm going to be in Tulsa, Oklahoma on fucking February six. I got Baltimore today and Philly tomorrow and then a bunch of tour dates coming up. Go check cheaterna.com or also punch up live Chaterina.
[43:36]
Che Durena
You have a gig in Baltimore today. Yeah, we are different kinds of guys.
[43:39]
Zach Amico
Yeah.
[43:41]
Che Durena
Halfway there by now.
[43:42]
Zach Amico
Oh, yeah. I'm grabbing the train after this.
[43:44]
Joe List
Zach Amico.
[43:45]
Lewis J. Gomez
February 14th and 15th, Worcester, Massachusetts. Juggalo weekend. I'll be doing commentary for JCW Wrestling. Come hang out.
[43:53]
Joe List
Very cool. Come see me live on the road. The Bring five Friends tour. Bring five Friends. Don't come alone. Don't be a loser. This weekend. I'm sorry. Next weekend I'll be in Rumors. Winnipeg, Manitoba, Canada. Very excited about that. And then in a couple weeks, I'm at Wise Guy, Salt Lake City. Love that place. I think I'm staying an extra day or two so I can go skiing in Salt Lake City, which I've never done. Nice. Excuse me. My march is gonna. My march is filling up right now. The Drop Comedy Club, South Bend, Indiana. Rally, North Carolina. First time I'm going to rally, Charlie. Good nights. Is that what it's called?
[44:23]
Che Durena
Raleigh?
[44:24]
Joe List
Shut up.
[44:25]
Che Durena
If you said rally, they're gonna hate you.
[44:27]
Joe List
Punchline Philly coming up in April. American Comedy Company coming up in April. As long as Moon Tower doesn't try to butt me, I'll be at Moon Tower. They sent me a. What I would describe as a disrespectful offer.
[44:39]
Che Durena
Oh, jeez.
[44:40]
Joe List
A disrespectful offer. Oh, my God. But maybe that's going to happen. I think we're doing the. The National Comedy Festival as well with Story Wars. Lots of stuff coming up. Go to louisofskanks.com grab those tickets, sign up for my mailing list. You get direct news for everything from Skank Fest to Gas Digital, everything that's going on in my life. Plus I do a bonus podcast that is only for subscribers to that email list. The only Way to get it is by subscribing the Lewis Journal podcast, my solo podcasts. But also check out all my other podcasts, the regs with myself, Joe List, Robert Kelly and Dan Soder, the legendary Legionist gangs. And obviously Story wars as well with me and Big J.
[45:15]
Che Durena
We gotta talk about that Story Wars.
[45:17]
Joe List
We will. Also I have a special that I'm taping July 12th, side Splitters Tampa. Tickets are going very fast. Get those tickets early. It's gonna be a blast. Bobby Kelly the cheater is the cheat. Bobby Kelly the. He's directing and yeah, yeah, get those skank my s in six minutes.
[45:33]
Che Durena
You've seen the comments?
[45:34]
Joe List
Yeah.
[45:35]
Che Durena
Unbelievable. I've seen the footage.
[45:37]
Joe List
I saw the footage.
[45:37]
Lewis J. Gomez
When did they add a ch to Bobby's nickname?
[45:44]
Joe List
It did take me a minute. Yeah, Bobby cheated on Story Wars.
[45:54]
Che Durena
Apparently I'm a story warrior. Apparently. You've seen the video.
[45:57]
Joe List
Look, that was fucked up. There's no instant replay rule. Right.
[46:01]
Che Durena
So this later on replay.
[46:02]
Joe List
But you know, are we taking away a story warrior title?
[46:05]
Che Durena
Yes.
[46:06]
Joe List
I don't think we can strip somebody.
[46:07]
Che Durena
Of a title up. That's crazy. Not only did he cheat, he then turned and put his middle finger in my face. A sore winner. He was like this.
[46:16]
Lewis J. Gomez
No, this seems like this happens to you a lot. You get a lot of middle fingers directly in your ch.
[46:21]
Che Durena
One from a 23 year old girl, one from a 10 year old girl. That was crazy.
[46:25]
Joe List
He was.
[46:26]
Che Durena
He me.
[46:27]
Zach Amico
How did he cheat?
[46:28]
Che Durena
What did he do? So he looked at my answer.
[46:30]
Joe List
We. We. So if you. If you tie in Story wars, we created a tie breaker round which you have to bet a certain amount of points you hide from everybody and then the last two people are the only people to vote. And when Joe was turned around, Bobby looked at the amount of points that he wagered and then he chose the same answer as Joe. So he just essentially.
[46:50]
Che Durena
Yeah, yeah, he took my answer.
[46:52]
Zach Amico
Damn.
[46:53]
Che Durena
So and I went strategic. If he had. If we both had the same wrong answer, I would have won. So if. If we were both. If I had been wrong and he took my answer, I would have won. That would have been fun. But yeah, just a up thing to do.
[47:05]
Joe List
You gotta get a rematch. We'll do. We'll do a rematch.
[47:07]
Che Durena
It should be a rematch. He should be disqualified from ever playing again.
[47:11]
Joe List
You should kill him.
[47:13]
Che Durena
Absolutely.
[47:13]
Zach Amico
Now you have a villain. You have a heel of of Story wars who is of course bottom. And then you guys go up. You're the hero.
[47:19]
Che Durena
I am the hero. And rooting for You. I just. I. Whatever. Outplayed them gave me the finger sore. Winner.
[47:28]
Joe List
Four minutes until Skankfest pre sale goes on sale. Very exciting, guys.
[47:32]
Che Durena
By the way, somebody pointed out a flaw with the game, which is a good point. Do you know it?
[47:36]
Joe List
Stop saying point while you're pointing.
[47:37]
Che Durena
I don't like that there's a flaw with your game.
[47:39]
Joe List
Somebody pointed out a good point. What is the flaw?
[47:42]
Che Durena
If you. Because the stories are random.
[47:44]
Joe List
Yeah.
[47:45]
Che Durena
The more stories you personally have, the more points you're able to win.
[47:48]
Joe List
Yes. So Bobby ended up getting three stories told that night as well.
[47:52]
Che Durena
Yes.
[47:53]
Joe List
But can I tell you why?
[47:54]
Che Durena
Allows him to get more points.
[47:55]
Joe List
So, yes, technically. You know, I. I think they should never do three. That's a little bit crazy because everyone else only had one story. But the game is fair because everyone is randomly generated. So it's not like, you know, it's. You could be the person that has two stories pulled, and I only have one pulled. And I've won so many times where I've only had one story pulled.
[48:16]
Che Durena
Right.
[48:16]
Joe List
It's about how you play the game, but it's not perfect. In Wheel of Fortune, when you spin it, some people land on 600, some people land on 100. You know, it's. It's randomized. Is that. Is that unfair? Because that Guy landed on $600 when he spun it randomly.
[48:28]
Zach Amico
And perfectly fair isn't fun. You want like a little bit of imbalance because it makes more interest.
[48:33]
Joe List
It's also not real. It's just a podcast.
[48:36]
Che Durena
Well, because though, if your story comes up, you can win from every person, but if your story's not up, you can only win two points.
[48:43]
Shannon Lee
Is this the moment where he looks.
[48:45]
Che Durena
1.33.5 was the time. Something like that. Yeah. I knock over a glass of water, pull it up, let's see it. I got it memorized. Cause 4000 people wrote to me. Look at that big dumb smile. He's all happy because he knows he's gonna cheat.
[49:00]
Shannon Lee
I have a different timestamp here, but I feel like he glances for a second and then I'll go to where you just said.
[49:03]
Che Durena
Okay, yeah, let's see the glance first.
[49:06]
Joe List
That if I win, no one can touch me.
[49:08]
Shannon Lee
Right there.
[49:09]
Joe List
Aha.
[49:10]
Che Durena
Yeah. So he sees my points.
[49:12]
Joe List
Can I say something though? And then.
[49:13]
Shannon Lee
What's the next one? 133.
[49:14]
Che Durena
Yeah. When the answer comes up, when I knock over water. So he cheated there. He sees my point.
[49:20]
Joe List
Nice. You're a king. Look at my. Look at my prize.
[49:24]
Che Durena
Thank you, Lewis. I Appreciate that. Also I'd never been pointed out how much J says everybody.
[49:32]
Joe List
Jay is the your points. There's some. There's some holes in Jay's game. He says everybody a lot. High school fool for a little bit.
[49:41]
Che Durena
Watch. Okay, here it comes. I'm going to knock over some water here.
[49:44]
Joe List
Scatteries. I do love Scatteries. And he has crushes on Scattergories is another joke. Come on folks. This is great. Layers.
[49:52]
Che Durena
It's coming. It's coming. Jay looks beautiful here.
[49:56]
Joe List
I'm not trying. I'm not trying.
[49:58]
Zach Amico
He's supposed to be Rocky Horror pictures came to win.
[50:02]
Joe List
I'm still going home to Jenny's but I still don't know what the game's.
[50:04]
Che Durena
Categories is because that's cheating.
[50:08]
Joe List
This is a ruse.
[50:10]
Che Durena
There it comes. Boom. There it is. He looks and then he looks at you guys to see if he's in trouble.
[50:18]
Joe List
He looked at your points and your answer.
[50:20]
Che Durena
Yes, he did.
[50:21]
Joe List
They both voted me.
[50:24]
Che Durena
And look at the smile. See his little smile.
[50:26]
Joe List
Cuz you. He knows. He knows there's no way that he can lose.
[50:29]
Che Durena
He knows he's gonna win.
[50:30]
Lewis J. Gomez
He also sipped his drink with his pinky out.
[50:33]
Che Durena
Yeah, he knows he's gonna win now cuz he's cheated, Alex.
[50:38]
Joe List
Wow.
[50:38]
Che Durena
And then he plays. Then he plays it off like he's gonna lose. See, look at now he does a thing. He's acting like oh man, maybe I didn't win.
[50:46]
Joe List
Yeah, we know what happens. We know what happens.
[50:48]
Che Durena
And then watch his reaction though. Play him given the finger.
[50:51]
Joe List
Play him, give him the finger.
[50:52]
Che Durena
Look like how rude this is. All right, fast forward a little bit. Fast forward. Okay, so he's gonna play it out. By the way, still has the marker in his hand. Why does he have a marker in his hand right now?
[51:02]
Joe List
No, that's.
[51:04]
Lewis J. Gomez
Wait a minute. How many points did he.
[51:07]
Joe List
Bobby's bad acting got the marker. That's why Bobby never became famous. He's a actor.
[51:13]
Che Durena
He's got 1414 piece of. Now look at this. This is a man who has cheated to win. Look at him giving me the finger as though he won. Still give me the finger.
[51:26]
Joe List
I go for it, cuz.
[51:28]
Che Durena
I go for it. Yeah, you go for it. What a yeah.
[51:33]
Lewis J. Gomez
Cuz for 10 years whenever Dane Cook wanted someone he would go, hey, Bobby, go for that.
[51:38]
Che Durena
What an. I mean I want a rematch. I want soda out of there. I want his kids dead. I want his house burned to the ground. That's crazy because I go for it. Yeah, you cheat.
[51:51]
Joe List
Yeah, that was Pretty wild. That was unbelievable. Yeah, look, we gotta figure it out. But Skankfest tickets are officially on sale. Guys, Go right now to yokradium.com skankfest and grab your pre sale tickets that include the Thursday night kickoff party. They're discounted from the regular pass. It's cheaper and you get more for it. So that's that. And I believe they will sell out today.
[52:11]
Che Durena
So now are there two hotels? I want the nice hotel. Hotel. Every year I'm in the lesson.
[52:15]
Joe List
A crazy hotel.
[52:17]
Che Durena
Crazy nice.
[52:18]
Joe List
Yeah, but it's not near the venue. I got an Uber. All right, but I'll tell them to put you in that hotel. It's like, it's really nice.
[52:23]
Che Durena
I want the good hotel. If there's two hotels, one good, one bad, I want the good.
[52:27]
Joe List
So I think the hotels near the venue are like, there's a Hilton Garden Inn is the closest one or something.
[52:33]
Che Durena
Hilton Garden Inn.
[52:35]
Joe List
I'm a Hilton diamond status.
[52:37]
Che Durena
Wow.
[52:38]
Joe List
Just so you know, that's great, right?
[52:40]
Che Durena
I'm Delta Diamond.
[52:41]
Joe List
Early check in, late checkout.
[52:43]
Che Durena
Whoa.
[52:44]
Joe List
They give you $20. $20 per day for food and drinks. Oh, it's sarcasm coming at me.
[52:51]
Che Durena
Where's the B? I want the.
[52:53]
Zach Amico
I wasn't being sarcastic. I thought that sounded great.
[52:55]
Che Durena
Yeah, I want a real hotel.
[52:57]
Zach Amico
I was like, how do I get this diamond status?
[52:59]
Joe List
You got to stay in exclusively Hilton's for like a long time. I learned it with Aaron Burke. Me and Aaron Berg went on tour together.
[53:05]
Zach Amico
He's a really good points guy. He made the whole point sprinkle.
[53:08]
Joe List
He's a J.
[53:08]
Lewis J. Gomez
Especially when it's other people's points points.
[53:11]
Joe List
So this would. This would happen. He was like. He was like, I'll book the hotels for us. Don't worry. And I didn't realize for the tour he was getting double points on his card.
[53:19]
Zach Amico
Yeah.
[53:19]
Joe List
And then I found that out. I was like, you. He's like, what? He's a piece of. Yeah, he. So. But then I. I learned that lesson, which was pretty nice.
[53:28]
Zach Amico
Yeah.
[53:28]
Lewis J. Gomez
Wow.
[53:28]
Che Durena
Okay.
[53:29]
Joe List
Yeah, you got to get those points, dude. Hilton Diamond's great. Then when every time. Every time I have a problem, I'm like, listen, I'm. I'm a Diamond Hilton member. Like, you know, know, I mean, I say here, exclusive. You could check if you'd like. And then they're like, oh, sorry, sir.
[53:40]
Che Durena
And I imagine you have a problem every single time.
[53:42]
Joe List
There's a separate line. There's a separate line that is for Hilton honors members.
[53:45]
Che Durena
Separate but equal.
[53:46]
Joe List
So you get to Go. You get to check in. There'll be people waiting online. I walk right past them. Like I'll be over here.
[53:51]
Zach Amico
Makes you understand racism a little more.
[53:53]
Joe List
It's nice.
[53:54]
Che Durena
I've never had a hard time understanding racism.
[53:59]
Joe List
Oh, I gotta. Zach, do me a favor. Take over, start a story. I got a pee so bad. Badly drinking so much liquid.
[54:05]
Zach Amico
Have we even got to a story yet?
[54:06]
Joe List
No. Good.
[54:07]
Che Durena
The show is what not supposed to be story. Is this story wars? Are you cheating?
[54:12]
Zach Amico
Yeah, yeah, yeah, dude, I will cheat a story wars for sure. I lost a story wars so bad I came last place.
[54:18]
Lewis J. Gomez
I, I love it. I, I, I also was pretty deceptive. I, I, I cheated towards the.
[54:23]
Joe List
Yeah.
[54:24]
Che Durena
What do you mean you cheated though?
[54:25]
Lewis J. Gomez
Cuz I knew it was my story for the bonus rounds, so I picked myself.
[54:31]
Che Durena
Oh, but you're not supposed to be in there.
[54:33]
Lewis J. Gomez
Yeah, I found a flaw in the system.
[54:35]
Che Durena
Oh, there's a couple flaws in the system.
[54:37]
Joe List
All right.
[54:37]
Lewis J. Gomez
I actually, I saw this story yesterday. Lyft driver sued by woman.
[54:42]
Zach Amico
Yes.
[54:43]
Lewis J. Gomez
Because he told her she was too big to get in his car. And immediately as a fat person, I was very upset.
[54:49]
Zach Amico
Yeah.
[54:50]
Lewis J. Gomez
And then I saw this lady, she's.
[54:52]
Zach Amico
Like, they put her weight. I saw it, it's like £468. Like she's not, she's not tiny. And she like pulls up or he pulls up, he's like, you can't get in the car. He's like, you're gonna blow up my tires. Like you can't handle it.
[55:03]
Che Durena
Can we see the lady?
[55:04]
Lewis J. Gomez
Yeah, she's a. Well, we got a video.
[55:06]
Shannon Lee
Yeah, I have two videos. So the first one is the video that she took of the incident. So I'll show you that first.
[55:11]
Lewis J. Gomez
What this MF said I can't fit his car.
[55:15]
F
What you saying?
[55:16]
Joe List
I got no space, My car is small.
[55:20]
F
I can fit in this car.
[55:21]
Lewis J. Gomez
No, believe me you can.
[55:23]
F
Yes, I can.
[55:23]
Che Durena
Believe me you can.
[55:25]
Joe List
So I'm sorry, what's, what am I.
[55:27]
F
Going do about my money?
[55:29]
Joe List
I'm going to cancel you.
[55:30]
Lewis J. Gomez
You're not going to be charged.
[55:32]
F
So you telling me I can't get in a lift because I can't fit in your car?
[55:37]
Lewis J. Gomez
Yeah, you need to order a bigger car.
[55:39]
Joe List
What makes you think I can't f.
[55:40]
Zach Amico
You need an Excel?
[55:41]
F
Yeah, I'm sorry, what makes you think I can't fit in this car?
[55:45]
Lewis J. Gomez
Cuz the car is small in the back.
[55:47]
F
Best friend has a B that's newer than this that I can fit in. That's the same size yeah, I'm sorry.
[55:54]
Lewis J. Gomez
I can't.
[55:55]
Che Durena
The guy seems very.
[55:56]
F
So you really telling me. I'm too busy getting your car, so I got to order another lift.
[56:02]
Lewis J. Gomez
She is out of breath from the jargon.
[56:04]
Zach Amico
Yes.
[56:04]
Lewis J. Gomez
And to be more.
[56:05]
Joe List
More specific with you, I got very tired. Tired?
[56:10]
F
What I got to do with your tires?
[56:13]
Lewis J. Gomez
You're looking at them like you want to eat them.
[56:18]
F
How do you know I don't have no space?
[56:22]
Lewis J. Gomez
Because I tried before.
[56:24]
F
Huh?
[56:25]
Lewis J. Gomez
Because I've been in this situation.
[56:27]
F
So every big person you signed on because they can't fit in your car.
[56:31]
Che Durena
Yeah, because he's like, do you remember Bobby Kelly three years ago?
[56:35]
F
I will definitely have to order an Uber xl. What's your name? Okay. Nope.
[56:47]
Joe List
Apparently you'll create them. Did not turn on the link. I don't know what's happening. Guys, go to skankfest.com if you're watching live. If it's not working on your Kratom, I'm trying to buy them. Just go to skankfest.com skankfest.com. guys, I don't know what's going on. I just messaged your Kratom. Hold on.
[57:04]
Che Durena
Yokratum.
[57:06]
Joe List
Let's see.
[57:06]
Shannon Lee
Gangfest.com is bringing to the same site.
[57:10]
Joe List
Oh, my God. What is happening here?
[57:12]
Che Durena
Oh, boy.
[57:13]
Joe List
What is happening here?
[57:15]
Lewis J. Gomez
That's what. You can figure it out. We'll talk about this big fat lady.
[57:17]
Zach Amico
Yeah.
[57:18]
Shannon Lee
So the other video I have is of her being interviewed by tmz.
[57:21]
Che Durena
Holy shit. Look at this lady.
[57:23]
Zach Amico
She's huge.
[57:24]
Joe List
Can you.
[57:25]
Lewis J. Gomez
Is there a full body shot of her? Because you got to see the scope of her.
[57:28]
Zach Amico
Yeah. She's got, like, one of those guns that, like. Dude, you could. I mean, that's a workout. Just picking it up. Like, if you were trying to eat her out, you would get stuck under there. You would need to do that. Like those workouts that, like, Floyd Mayweather does the weight on, like, the headband stretches his head up and down. Yeah.
[57:45]
Lewis J. Gomez
Yeah. You gotta, like. I do. I4. I don't. I think 468 is being very generous.
[57:52]
Zach Amico
Yeah. I mean, she's. She's big. I mean, that's what they.
[57:54]
Joe List
Huge.
[57:54]
Zach Amico
That's what I saw in the headlines was four.
[57:56]
Lewis J. Gomez
The biggest I've been is 450. 450.
[57:58]
Zach Amico
Yeah. And that's.
[57:59]
Che Durena
Is that right?
[57:59]
Lewis J. Gomez
Yeah. The biggest I've ever been is 450. And this lady, I think's gotta. Yeah, I've never been that big.
[58:06]
Che Durena
What?
[58:07]
Zach Amico
Dude. Yeah. That's pretty crazy.
[58:08]
Che Durena
Look at her.
[58:09]
Lewis J. Gomez
And I guess maybe she's short. And we assume she's like a monster.
[58:13]
Zach Amico
Yeah. But I mean, being like that big, it's like the guy's probably just like, hey, if you get my car and you the suspension, no one pays for that. I gotta pay for that. And he's just thinking about his well being. His is. But she's not suing him. She's suing lift.
[58:26]
Che Durena
She is short. You can see that. The door handles are like.
[58:30]
Lewis J. Gomez
Oh, yeah. She is pretty short, huh?
[58:32]
Che Durena
But my Christ, what's the tattoo of?
[58:35]
Zach Amico
I don't know. The whole top of the Cinti's chapel.
[58:39]
Che Durena
Oh, that's a bad tattoo.
[58:41]
Joe List
Yeah.
[58:41]
Zach Amico
I mean, she doesn't take care of her body.
[58:42]
Joe List
I don't like that.
[58:43]
Lewis J. Gomez
We have all the same tattoo spaces, by the way.
[58:46]
Joe List
I resent that.
[58:47]
Che Durena
Yeah. This could be the love of your life.
[58:48]
Lewis J. Gomez
Zach, this is a. This is a sizable gal.
[58:51]
Zach Amico
That is dude.
[58:52]
Lewis J. Gomez
And I. I kind of. That one. I get what the. This. I get what this guy had to do, man.
[58:58]
Zach Amico
Yeah, yeah. 100, I don't think.
[59:00]
Lewis J. Gomez
Yeah, let's see the interview.
[59:01]
Che Durena
And he was quite pleasant about it. He wasn't like, you, you fat.
[59:04]
Lewis J. Gomez
Well, he also said, I'll cancel. I'm sorry.
[59:07]
Zach Amico
Yeah. But my car can't handle it. I'm like, I'm not putting my. Dude, if you up my car. This is my livelihood.
[59:12]
Lewis J. Gomez
I think a better thing to do would have been a lie and be like, I'm so sorry. I just had a family emergency.
[59:18]
Zach Amico
Yeah.
[59:19]
Lewis J. Gomez
I'm going to cancel your ride. I truly apologize.
[59:21]
Zach Amico
Smarter move. Smarter move. Yeah.
[59:23]
Lewis J. Gomez
Just don't be like, hey, you're too fat to get in my car. Not to protect her feelings, just to get out of the situation.
[59:28]
Zach Amico
Yeah, of course.
[59:29]
Che Durena
She's got a real case of basketball. Head is like perfectly round.
[59:33]
Zach Amico
Basketball.
[59:36]
Lewis J. Gomez
That's what they call them in Joe's neighborhood. I mean, a sneaker face.
[59:42]
Zach Amico
Yeah.
[59:44]
Che Durena
Like perfectly circular.
[59:46]
Lewis J. Gomez
All right, let's. Okay, buddy.
[59:49]
Joe List
Yeah, no, I'm okay.
[59:50]
Lewis J. Gomez
Don't worry. We've been holding it down without you.
[59:52]
Che Durena
Oh, yeah.
[59:53]
Lewis J. Gomez
We're making fun of a fat lady.
[59:54]
Joe List
Hi, fat lady. Guys, go buy those tickets now. There we go.
[59:57]
Che Durena
Doesn't it look, you could behead her and just bounce her head around.
[59:59]
Zach Amico
Yeah, dude, it is. You're right. It is perfectly.
[60:01]
Che Durena
Put a nice rotation on it.
[60:03]
Joe List
Yeah. Really set off a lot of discussion about when they can deny people. And I've seen some Lyft and Uber drivers.
[60:12]
Che Durena
I love how serious they are.
[60:13]
Joe List
We are independent contractors. We have the right to. To deny people for all sorts of reasons because they're getting into our personal vehicles, that's fine.
[60:21]
F
I understand where they're coming from. I respect everybody's opinion. But still, at the same time, I feel like us as bigger people, we not accommodated. He didn't even try. As soon as he looked at me, he dismissed me, you know, so I just felt like that was wrong.
[60:34]
Joe List
He never opened the door. You didn't get into the car. And then he decided. He just looked at you and said.
[60:39]
F
That no doors were open. The doors were locked. As I was walking to the car, like, there was just nothing. It was just like, I see you, you big. You can't fit in my car.
[60:49]
Joe List
I heard the part where he said, I've been through this before.
[60:53]
Che Durena
How has you ever seen it so.
[60:55]
Joe List
Big from other people in Detroit once you posted this video? I'm just wondering if there were other people who said, yeah, I've dealt with that guy. Or I've just had this issue with rideshares in general.
[61:07]
F
So to clear things up, I've never been through this before. You know, that's why I was so shocked and I'm so hurt about it. But after I share my story with the world, like, a lot of people. A lot of people came to me and told me the same thing had happened to them. You know, like, if. If I didn't share it to the.
[61:24]
Lewis J. Gomez
World, then Shannon, what drive through. Was she trying to get him to take her through?
[61:30]
Zach Amico
I.
[61:30]
Che Durena
Great eyebrows.
[61:32]
Zach Amico
She might like one thing. The guy. I think if you get picked up, they can see, like, reviews of what other people have said about you. And someone might have been like, sure, she my car, dude. Don't like. Unless you got an SUV or you got some good suspension in your car. Don't let her in there. If you got a Toyota Corolla, she's gonna blow that out. So that could have been, like, part of it.
[61:50]
Che Durena
She might smell like a bag of farts, too. There's a lot of crevices. I can't imagine she could get like that under the knee thing.
[61:56]
Zach Amico
That's crazy.
[61:57]
Lewis J. Gomez
Yeah, there's a lot in. There's. There's a lot going on there.
[61:59]
Shannon Lee
By the way, she's. Her profession is rapper.
[62:03]
Zach Amico
Yeah, that's. Yeah.
[62:03]
Shannon Lee
I don't know if you wanted to see a little bit of a music video. I'm just gonna. I'm gonna mute it. If. I'll play it for a second, then I'm gonna mute it, and I'll just play the Video.
[62:20]
Lewis J. Gomez
Those are her knees.
[62:23]
Shannon Lee
I'm gonna skip ahead.
[62:25]
Che Durena
Oh, okay.
[62:27]
Shannon Lee
I'm gonna mute it.
[62:28]
Che Durena
That sounds nice.
[62:31]
Joe List
Jesus.
[62:32]
Lewis J. Gomez
I mean, nobody's ever said fat ladies can't sing.
[62:34]
Che Durena
True.
[62:35]
Zach Amico
That's it. Yeah, that is quite the opposite.
[62:38]
Joe List
Sorry, guys. I'm fine.
[62:39]
Lewis J. Gomez
Don't be stressed. You're good.
[62:40]
Joe List
I was freaking out. Yo, Kratom me right in my ass.
[62:45]
Zach Amico
Hey, it's all fixed.
[62:46]
Joe List
They didn't turn it on until 107. Come on, guys.
[62:49]
Zach Amico
They gave you a little kiss. They probably made an apology. Fine.
[62:52]
Joe List
It's all good. It's all.
[62:53]
Che Durena
They should fund the movie.
[62:54]
Joe List
They should. They will.
[62:55]
Che Durena
Really?
[62:56]
Joe List
We might have to have an addiction to kratom. Just scooping Kratom into my mouth. Go. Yeah. By the way, I said, somebody said that the Ukrainian site's blocked in Thailand. Just go to Tixer T I x R and you guys get the tickets directly from there as well.
[63:12]
Che Durena
We need those.
[63:12]
Zach Amico
Thailand?
[63:13]
Che Durena
Yeah, we need them.
[63:14]
Zach Amico
Yeah, dude. Oh, maybe some lady boys are getting.
[63:16]
Che Durena
That's what I mean. Yeah.
[63:17]
Zach Amico
Yeah.
[63:18]
Che Durena
Me a newly.
[63:20]
Joe List
By the way, the tickets are 60 sold out, guys. 60 what? Sold out?
[63:25]
Che Durena
Yeah, in four minutes.
[63:26]
Lewis J. Gomez
The pre sale one.
[63:27]
Joe List
Pre sale.
[63:28]
Che Durena
Wow.
[63:28]
Joe List
Yeah, that.
[63:29]
Zach Amico
Right on.
[63:30]
Joe List
Yeah. No, no, 70% sold out.
[63:33]
Lewis J. Gomez
Have you ever had a lift driver not pick you up?
[63:35]
Zach Amico
No, no, no.
[63:36]
Lewis J. Gomez
I've only got it if I'm going to Brooklyn from Jersey.
[63:38]
Zach Amico
Okay.
[63:38]
Lewis J. Gomez
I've had him tell me I don't go to New York, but I think.
[63:41]
Joe List
That'S a. Oh, is this a story where they said she was too fat to get in the car?
[63:44]
Shannon Lee
By the way, Zach, that is illegal because I had the same thing happen coming back from Pennsylvania, and a guy called me and asked me where I was going, and I was like, staten Island. And he's like, oh. He's like, I have to cancel. He didn't cancel. I. I had to wait like 10 minutes. So I called Uber, went through the whole thing. They credited me. They credited me back $50, and I was like, just curious, are they allowed to ask where you're going? And she said, they're allowed to ask, but if they deny you, that's a form of discrimination and that they'll be penalized for it. So they're not allowed to do that.
[64:09]
Joe List
Yeah, anytime I send a check from New Jersey back to the city, I'd say one third of the cars that come find out it's a New York City trip. And then they say they're like, it.
[64:19]
Lewis J. Gomez
Yeah, yeah, I'll do the look on Lewis's Face. You see her fight, like when you see him finally get her out the door and then we're like, all right, what are we doing today? What happened?
[64:31]
Joe List
It's a goddamn nightmare. It's a goddamn nightmare. Cuz what it is, what? As soon as. As soon as a girl leaves and she's out the door and I close my door, I'm like, I'm done with that. Good. Don't got to think about it.
[64:40]
Lewis J. Gomez
She's not even fully packed. She's holding her thing. She's got one boot on. She's got a show in Brooklyn in 20 minutes.
[64:48]
Joe List
God, that just gave me a lot of anxiety.
[64:50]
Che Durena
But we're back 70, we're good.
[64:52]
Joe List
I'm fine. But you know, it does hit me, guys. It hits. It's. It's me.
[64:56]
Zach Amico
You want your fans to have the.
[64:57]
Lewis J. Gomez
Best possible experience and it reflects on you and you don't want people going, oh, your site doesn't work. And when it's in no way your fault.
[65:03]
Joe List
It is in no way my fault. God damn it, Brandon. From your Kratom. You son of a. I love him.
[65:09]
Che Durena
Brandon, give us 150k.
[65:12]
Joe List
Is that how much we need for the film?
[65:13]
Che Durena
Maybe a little more.
[65:15]
Joe List
You thought Tom Dustin's was 30K?
[65:17]
Che Durena
Yeah, but this is a lot more. There's like 75 characters involved. We're gonna have the movie, we have moving parts at the fest. We gotta fly out there at the festival.
[65:25]
Joe List
The.
[65:26]
Che Durena
We're gonna have you Patterson the rest feasts the hospital bills. Yeah, and that was load. This is this. That was Cheapo Depot. This is gonna be serious.
[65:35]
Joe List
Yeah, yeah, that was.
[65:37]
Lewis J. Gomez
Pick up your mom.
[65:38]
Joe List
I. Can we get my mom a tombstone? With some of the budget, it maybe.
[65:43]
Lewis J. Gomez
Maybe a Red Baron.
[65:44]
Che Durena
Let's do a bunch of gofundmes. Tombstones aren't cheap.
[65:46]
Joe List
Tombstones are expensive. I was going to buy one because I find. But if I. I mean, if I would have gotten to the tombstone 20 years ago, it would have been really affordable. And now it's just like, what did she ever do for me?
[65:58]
Che Durena
She bore you?
[65:59]
Joe List
She bores me.
[66:02]
Che Durena
She gave birth to you.
[66:03]
Joe List
Yeah, but you know, she tried her best. She did try her best. I've forgiven my mother.
[66:10]
Lewis J. Gomez
I'm going for it again. Instead of a tombstone, what about like a Red Baron?
[66:16]
Joe List
There we go. All right, let's. Let's talk about something else.
[66:21]
Che Durena
Sex baby. Let's talk about you.
[66:23]
Zach Amico
I got a dip pretty quick here.
[66:25]
Joe List
Okay. What time you gotta get out?
[66:26]
Zach Amico
I gotta train at 2:05.
[66:28]
Che Durena
Yeah, he's going to Baltimore saying, you're giving me anxiety.
[66:31]
Joe List
You can get. Sorry, I'm out of with you. We'll give it a few more minutes on the show, but I'm gonna give it another seven, eight minutes.
[66:37]
Zach Amico
Okay.
[66:38]
Joe List
Typically we do a 70 minute show, 75 minute show. Oh, God. The anxiety that I just felt. What is this? Swimmer got caught in an obscene act on the beach. Shannon.
[66:48]
Shannon Lee
Okay, so this happened in Brazil. And there was a guy that was masturbating in the water. And I have a video. I might mute it because they're not speaking in English and it's just annoying.
[67:00]
Che Durena
Masturbating underwater is fun because the cum comes out weird. So he's jerking off, this guy.
[67:07]
Zach Amico
Dude, this is a mission of a wank, dude. He's getting hit by waves and stuff. He's got to hold his breath as he's jerking it.
[67:15]
Che Durena
And he's drawing a crowd. Oh, those are just regular beach people.
[67:19]
Shannon Lee
Yeah. There's also, like children.
[67:23]
Che Durena
Oh, they're punching because he was jerking off.
[67:25]
Joe List
Yeah.
[67:25]
Zach Amico
As you should. Good. This is like Gooner level stuff. Did you guys see the Gooner side?
[67:30]
Lewis J. Gomez
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
[67:31]
Zach Amico
This is like Gunar side. Brazil. It's. They're branching out now.
[67:34]
Joe List
So Gooner or somebody who masturbates in public.
[67:36]
Zach Amico
No, a Gooner is like a lifestyle of complete horniness and like, it's a mentality of, like, just being obsessed with like, porn and jerking off.
[67:44]
Joe List
Okay.
[67:44]
Zach Amico
And then there was the Gooner side. Did you see the Gooner side?
[67:47]
Joe List
No.
[67:47]
Zach Amico
So there's this dude who went through a drive through.
[67:49]
Joe List
No, we saw that. We covered that on Legion of Skanks this week.
[67:51]
Zach Amico
Yeah. And then he killed himself. And then the was the Gooner roll. So a bunch of people held like a memorial for him at the Bikini Beans.
[67:57]
Joe List
Yeah.
[67:58]
Zach Amico
To like a funeral for the Gooner. That was the Gooner.
[68:01]
Joe List
So they were like, these girls haven't been harassed enough.
[68:03]
Zach Amico
Yeah, that's exactly. Exactly it. Yeah.
[68:06]
Che Durena
So this guy was beating off, but we didn't really see much footage of him actually beating off. I just saw a flavor.
[68:11]
Joe List
We are sold out, folks.
[68:13]
Che Durena
Hey. Wow.
[68:14]
Joe List
Pre sale, all access. Sold out, guys. Thank you very much. What is that fucking. How many minutes?
[68:20]
Lewis J. Gomez
Nine minutes. Minutes.
[68:21]
Joe List
Yeah. Nine minutes.
[68:22]
Che Durena
That's great. Now how many tickets is that?
[68:25]
Joe List
I think, like, I want to say 1400 or something like that.
[68:28]
Che Durena
And is this bigger than the.
[68:29]
Joe List
It's gonna be a little bit bigger than the original skank fest or than last year's gang fest. Not much. A lot More space, though. The venue itself has, like, way more seating, way more rooms. Way it's gonna be.
[68:40]
Lewis J. Gomez
It's where they have the floats for Marty Gr.
[68:42]
Joe List
Yeah. So in the. In the warehouse, they store all the Maral floats. But we essentially have rented part of the warehouse. And then they have multiple rooms and venues attached within it. There's a big outside area along the water. We're gonna have, like, carnival rides. We're gonna have stupid dude.
[68:54]
Zach Amico
Yeah.
[68:54]
Che Durena
What about Schumer? You gonna get Schumer?
[68:56]
Joe List
We're gonna ask her.
[68:57]
Che Durena
That'd be awesome.
[68:58]
Joe List
I don't think she's gonna say yes. I think we've talked too much about Schumer together.
[69:02]
Lewis J. Gomez
I don't think she's getting on the carnival roads.
[69:04]
Joe List
We might use her as a float. I want to ride Amy. Let's see. Justin. L says I'm a big fat liar. Go try to buy tickets, ace.
[69:24]
Lewis J. Gomez
You're not fat.
[69:27]
Joe List
This is going to wait list. What does that mean? 301 in escrow. I don't know what this all means. Yeah, I mean, I guess you can still try, but they just told me it sold out. So let's see. I gotta log in. No, I'm not doing that.
[69:39]
Zach Amico
I mean, that's pretty sick. How many people go to Skank Fest? What's your. What's the.
[69:43]
Joe List
It's a few thousand per day.
[69:44]
Zach Amico
Damn.
[69:44]
Joe List
That's pretty awesome.
[69:45]
Zach Amico
Awesome.
[69:46]
Joe List
Yeah, it's gonna be pretty sick.
[69:47]
Che Durena
I love Skankfest.
[69:49]
Joe List
Me too.
[69:50]
Che Durena
It's the happiest time of my life.
[69:52]
Joe List
Yeah, we were all Gooners. When? In high school.
[69:54]
Zach Amico
Yeah.
[69:55]
Joe List
You know, we were all horny. When you get porn dropped in your lap like, that's that. I used to just. I used to beat my dick so much.
[70:02]
Zach Amico
Then you, like, graduate from it. You leave it behind. The goon lifestyle you leave behind. And some people just never stop.
[70:07]
Joe List
You grow up. Yeah, but all those guys that were in that video for the guy who killed himself were all like, 19 years old. Yeah, they were just. They're not Gooners. They're just horny kids who can't get laid. And it's so much easier to just jerk off.
[70:18]
Che Durena
I used to jerk off four times a day.
[70:20]
Joe List
What do you jerk off with? Do you go Dry Joe?
[70:22]
Che Durena
Dry Joe? No. I mean, occasionally I will, but if I'm in a hotel, which is usually where I do my masturbating, I'll try to use lotion or something.
[70:31]
Joe List
Sometimes the lotion, like, doesn't burn, but it gives you, like, a tingly sensation.
[70:35]
Zach Amico
When it's, like, scented.
[70:36]
Joe List
Yeah. Yeah. I don't love lotion. I. I'm a coconut oil guy.
[70:41]
Che Durena
Whoa.
[70:42]
Joe List
Coconut oil is so.
[70:44]
Che Durena
What, do you travel with coconut oil?
[70:46]
Joe List
Sometimes. Well, I also do coconut oil pulling for my teeth.
[70:49]
Che Durena
What?
[70:49]
Joe List
Yeah. You scoop of coconut oil in your mouth, you swish it around for 15 minutes. Helps your gums, helps your teeth. Your smile makes them white, makes them stronger. Yeah.
[70:58]
Che Durena
No kidding.
[70:59]
Joe List
Yeah. Yeah, it's. I was doing it every day for a few months. Now I do it like two, three times a week.
[71:03]
Che Durena
Yeah.
[71:03]
Joe List
Did it today.
[71:04]
Che Durena
How about that, folks?
[71:05]
Joe List
Spit it right in your dick when you're done.
[71:07]
Che Durena
Oh, that's hot there. No, I used to. I've still this story before, but, like, I used to be hanging out with buddies and I'd pretend to take a. So I could jerk off. That's how much I needed to jerk off and how horny I was. Like, oh, I got a. Because I'd buy me time.
[71:20]
Zach Amico
Yeah.
[71:21]
Che Durena
Rub one out and just get a quick boom.
[71:22]
Zach Amico
And you'd be like, oh, thanks. I could be a person again.
[71:24]
Joe List
Gotta get the evil out.
[71:25]
Che Durena
Yeah.
[71:26]
Joe List
I've jerked off in the bathroom here. Shannon, have you ever masturbated in the bathroom here?
[71:29]
Shannon Lee
Never.
[71:29]
Joe List
Come on.
[71:30]
Shannon Lee
Absolutely not.
[71:31]
Joe List
No.
[71:32]
Che Durena
I don't think this is hot for women.
[71:34]
Joe List
No. Some women do. Which one? I won't say which one, but one of the waitresses from the stand told me that she masturbates in the bathroom.
[71:42]
Zach Amico
Really?
[71:42]
Che Durena
At the stand or at Gas Digital?
[71:44]
Joe List
No, at the sand.
[71:44]
Che Durena
Oh, okay.
[71:45]
Zach Amico
They're all hot.
[71:46]
Joe List
I mean, and it's. The one's hot.
[71:48]
Zach Amico
Yeah.
[71:48]
Che Durena
Wow.
[71:49]
Joe List
Oh, yeah.
[71:49]
Zach Amico
I think I know which one.
[71:50]
Joe List
No, you. Maybe you do. Say no more. Say no more.
[71:53]
Che Durena
Wow.
[71:54]
Joe List
Say no more.
[71:55]
Lewis J. Gomez
Joe Harari.
[71:59]
Che Durena
She's nice.
[72:00]
Joe List
The stand waitresses used to be the bomb.
[72:03]
Che Durena
They're still hot.
[72:04]
Joe List
They. She. They used to exclusively hire hot, slutty waitresses.
[72:08]
Zach Amico
Now they got some dudes in there.
[72:09]
Joe List
Yeah. And they got. They got a couple fat gals. It's like a. It's like wicked. It's like there's a couple hot chicks involved, but then there's a bunch of lesbians and fat chicks and gay Asian guy.
[72:19]
Che Durena
Yeah, Their payment just went up. I got an email last night. Yeah, it's nice.
[72:22]
Joe List
I don't put in the veils anymore, though.
[72:24]
Che Durena
Why?
[72:25]
Joe List
Because I don't really do spots in the city like that. That. Well.
[72:28]
Zach Amico
You live in Jersey?
[72:29]
Joe List
Yeah, I'm on the road every weekend. I mean, sometimes I. I'll pop on stage when I'M there for story wars or skanks, But I'm not going into the city just for a spot.
[72:37]
Zach Amico
I gotta dip.
[72:38]
Joe List
You gotta go.
[72:38]
Che Durena
All right.
[72:40]
Joe List
Is the man. Support him in everything that he does.
[72:42]
Zach Amico
Dark holes on all streaming platforms. Bye.
[72:44]
Che Durena
Yeah, get the hell out of here. You're making me anxious.
[72:46]
Zach Amico
2.
[72:47]
Che Durena
What time's the train? 205. 205.
[72:50]
Joe List
Okay, Joe, we're gonna go get lunch.
[72:51]
Che Durena
Here in a minute, all right? I'm excited.
[72:52]
Joe List
You're gonna get a steak.
[72:53]
Che Durena
We're gonna make it happen. I'm gonna get a steak.
[72:55]
Joe List
Yeah, yeah.
[72:55]
Che Durena
I'm starving.
[72:55]
Joe List
I got you. It's on me, me, bro.
[72:57]
Che Durena
All right. I just gotta. We're gonna take this.
[72:58]
Joe List
We're gonna take this out of the budget if we get.
[73:00]
Che Durena
All right, as soon as we're done, I gotta leave because my wife has the baby and I gotta alleviate. I was like, I'll be right back. And now I'm like, I'm gonna get a steak with Lewis. He's like, what? And this is cutting into my gym time now. I can't go to the gym.
[73:11]
Joe List
I went to the gym this morning. But I'm gonna go steam later on. You want to do a little spits later?
[73:15]
Che Durena
I gotta go straight back. I'm already blowing off my wife and child.
[73:18]
Joe List
She should be blowing you off. That's what I'm saying.
[73:20]
Che Durena
Yeah, Blow me.
[73:22]
Joe List
All right, we're done. I think think this has been a fun show. Sorry for everyone that had to wait to get tickets. I think everyone got them, though. Anybody and anybody not able to get tickets in the chat. I feel bad if you guys weren't able to. They're going to freak out. They're like, it wasn't working or left for it.
[73:37]
Che Durena
So only the people on this listening to the show could get them.
[73:40]
Joe List
No, no, no. I've been. We've been promoting it all week. Oh, email list. We're good. We're good.
[73:44]
Lewis J. Gomez
And then the second round of tickets will go on sale in May, I think after they announce the line up.
[73:49]
Joe List
After we announce the lineup.
[73:50]
Che Durena
You got to tell me. You got to give me some nuggets. When we get off here.
[73:52]
Joe List
I'll give you some nuggets, my friend. All right, well, we're done. Thank you guys for watching. We'll check you on Friday with our exclusive episode. You guys are the bomb diggity. Thank you. Good night. When they make a noise, take.