Zac Amico’s Morning Zoo – Episode 38 Summary
Guests: Ian Fidance, Andrew Packer
Date: August 24, 2025
Platform: GaS Digital Network
Overview
This episode of Zac Amico’s Morning Zoo brings together comedians Ian Fidance and Andrew Packer for a wild, off-kilter ride through weird news, personal stories, animal mishaps, and unfiltered banter. As always, Zac presides over the chaos, guiding the guests through topics ranging from bizarre animal facts to conjoined twins sexuality, with plenty of sidetracks into standup comedy road life, pet ownership, and the absurdity of modern living. The tone is raunchy, irreverent, and peppered with dark humor and comedic camaraderie.
Key Discussion Points & Insights
1. Plugs and Upcoming Shows
Timestamps: 02:31–03:49
- Andrew promotes his “Laugh It Off Live” show, which features both comics and his therapist father, encouraging audience participation ([02:39]).
- Ian details tour dates and teases his YouTube travel show “Ian: Odd Guy Doing Odd Jobs” ([03:02]).
- Zac pitches the GaS Digital subscription and his upcoming comedy tour ([03:49]).
2. Ian's Odd Jobs Tour Stories
Timestamps: 04:44–08:11
- Ian recounts getting “tackled by German shepherds” at a K9 facility. He describes the terror, unexpected pain through a thin dog suit, and the bizarre detail that the dog’s penis was hard out of excitement ([05:18], [05:56]).
- “They just want the dog to put you in enough pain to make you submit.” — Ian Fidance ([05:26])
- Further adventures: quick tattoo certification in Wisconsin, hands-on time at BattleBots arena in Vegas, and upcoming visits to reptile sanctuaries ([06:56], [08:09]).
- Zac likens Ian’s show to “Only in America with Larry the Cable Guy,” sparking tangent into “dad TV” and Americana ([08:11]).
3. Marksmen, American History & Military Anecdotes
Timestamps: 09:10–12:28
- Zac relays Larry the Cable Guy’s TV segment on marksmen and hunting, leading to a conversation about American and British military strategy, and the role of small-game hunters in the Revolutionary War ([09:10–10:22]).
- The group compares America’s overconfidence in past wars (Vietnam, Afghanistan) to the British—a lesson in military hubris ([10:41–11:30]).
- Comic family stories: Zac’s accidental classroom slur (“rat country”) and Ian’s uncle’s ignorant views on gay soldiers ([11:09–12:28]).
- “I remember being a kid and my dad explaining Vietnam to me... here we hear about this little rat country, Vietnam... and they destroyed us.” — Zac Amico ([11:11])
4. Mutant Rabbits, Horns, and HPV
Timestamps: 13:31–17:38
- Zac introduces the wild news: “Rabbits are growing horns in Colorado.” Turns out it’s the Shope papillomavirus (rabbit HPV), transmitted via bugs ([13:37–14:06], [14:36–14:55]).
- Shannon explains it's not a fungus, and the virus generally only affects rabbits ([14:06]).
- Highlight: Zac’s twisted hypothetical—“Is there a chance that HPV will mutate and all the girls that I’ve had sex with will start growing horns?” ([14:36])
- Rabbit care goes awry: Ian tells the story of a PA who abandoned photo-shoot rabbits in Park Slope, causing a local backlash ([15:52–17:38]).
5. The Rabbit Debate and Bad Pet Stories
Timestamps: 18:08–24:00
- The trio discusses what predators might eat domestic rabbits in NYC parks, prompting a bet and musings on pets vs. prey ([18:08–19:44]).
- Andrew is ambivalent about rabbits; Zac and Ian reminisce about living with difficult pet rabbits and the drama it caused — Zac’s roommate’s rabbit, Reggie, was a “spoiled boy” who once sabotaged a hangout with women ([20:14–22:53]).
6. Unusual Pets and Sugar Glider PSA
Timestamps: 28:02–31:12
- Zac declares: “You’re white trash if you have a ferret. It doesn’t belong in the house” ([28:02]).
- Conversation veers to sugar gliders; Zac and Shannon warn about their complex care, bonding needs, tendency to jump into boiling liquids, and disastrous outcomes as pets ([28:09–31:11]).
7. Cat vs. Dog People, Personality Mirroring & Racist Cats
Timestamps: 31:12–34:34
- Dog vs. cat ownership: Andrew and Ian banter about whose pet would win in a fight; Ian’s cats “are so gay, me” ([31:12–33:01]), Zac’s first cat was racist, especially towards Black visitors ([33:07], [33:20]).
- “I don’t know, he didn’t like Black people.” — Zac Amico ([33:20])
- Discussion of pet personality mirroring their owners’ quirks and anxieties.
8. Pet Death, Care When Traveling, and Cat Entertainment
Timestamps: 35:53–39:41
- Andrew recounts the touching tale of his childhood dog dying after he left for college ([35:56–36:13]).
- The hosts share pet-care hacks—automatic feeders, cat music, video distractions, and humorous mishaps (e.g., Ian’s cat accidentally calling 911) ([36:32–39:20]).
9. Animal Accidents: Deadly Elks, Turkey Pranks, and Viral Videos
Timestamps: 39:46–47:37
- The crew guesses the cause of death for Miss Russia-turned-Miss Universe, ultimately revealed as an elk smashing through her Porsche ([39:46–41:17]).
- Discussion turns to dark “prank deaths,” including someone dying from a frozen turkey thrown through a windshield. They watch and roast a viral video of a turkey getting freed from a truck only to be immediately hit by a car ([42:29–47:37]).
- “As the turkey gets hit, there’s just one feather, like the bag in American Beauty... It’s the one feather dancing in the wind like Pocahontas.” — Zac Amico ([47:27])
10. Conjoined Twins: Sex, Marriage, and Life Questions
Timestamps: 50:37–62:08
- Article sparks a deep-dive on Abby and Brittany Hensel, the famous conjoined twins who now have a baby ([50:50–51:41]).
- Panel fires off a barrage of questions—sex life logistics, consent, makeup routine, job fairness, biological oddities, and more ([54:00–62:08]).
- “Which one is he married to exactly?” — Andrew Packer ([51:24])
- “If one of them’s blowing you, the other one’s just like hitting the cushion?” — Andrew Packer ([54:06])
- “Say Britney doesn’t feel like having sex, but Abby does... is that rape?” — Ian Fidance ([54:53])
- “They probably rock-paper-scissors every time [who wipes].” — Ian Fidance ([59:56])
- “If one of them gets killed by a serial killer but he lets the other live...” — Ian Fidance ([60:31])
- Shannon delivers medical specifics: shared reproductive organs, digestive tracts, but two hearts/stomachs/lungs, and both are school teachers ([57:02–58:02]).
11. AI Catfishing & Final Stories
Timestamps: 63:29–65:54
- Zac brings up a recent news story: a New Jersey man dies on the way to meet an AI chatbot he believed was flirting with him. The elderly man, with diminished capacity, was lured to a fake address and died after falling in a parking lot ([63:29–65:16]).
- “I want to sit on the working side of your face.” — Zac, riffing about the chatbot ([64:45])
- The group closes with a callback joke about Zac’s earlier Vietnam slur story ([65:54]).
Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments
| Time | Quote & Attribution | |---------|---------------------------------------------------------------| | 05:26 | “They just want the dog to put you in enough pain to make you submit.” — Ian Fidance | | 09:44 | “The British fucking... These assholes come wearing red.” — Zac Amico | | 11:11 | “...here we hear about this little rat country, Vietnam, and they destroyed us.” — Zac Amico | | 12:16 | “...cuz when you’re in a foxhole, you don’t want to look over and your buddy’s over there putting on lipstick.” — Ian’s uncle via Ian Fidance | | 14:36 | “Is there a chance that HPV will mutate and all the girls that I’ve had sex with will start growing horns?” — Zac Amico | | 22:09 | “That’s iceberg lettuce. That doesn’t have the nutrients he needs.” — Zac quoting his roommate’s girlfriend | | 28:02 | “You’re white trash if you have [a ferret]. It doesn’t belong in the house.” — Zac Amico | | 33:20 | “I don’t know, he didn’t like black people.” — Zac Amico (about his cat Fred) | | 47:27 | “As the turkey gets hit, there’s just one feather, like the bag in American Beauty... It’s the one feather dancing in the wind like Pocahontas.” — Zac Amico | | 54:53 | “Say Britney doesn’t feel like having sex, but Abby does... is that rape?” — Ian Fidance | | 61:02 | “So. Do they only have two boobs?” — Ian Fidance | | 62:41 | “What if as an experiment, you and I tied our arms together for a day and our hips together and see if we could exist?” — Ian Fidance | | 64:45 | “I want to sit on the working side of your face.” — Zac Amico (AI chatbot bit) |
Timestamps for Important Segments
- Plugs & Show Previews – 02:31–03:49
- Ian’s K-9 Takedown & Odd Jobs – 04:44–08:11
- Larry the Cable Guy & Marksman History – 08:11–10:41
- Military Strategy & Family Stories – 10:41–12:28
- Rabbit Horns & Mutations – 13:31–14:55
- Pet Rabbit Mishaps in NYC – 15:52–17:38
- Predator Debate: Central Park – 18:08–19:44
- Bad Rabbit Roommate Stories – 20:14–22:53
- Sugar Glider Pet PSA – 28:02–31:12
- Pet Personality & Racist Cat – 33:07–33:34
- Pet Death & Care When Away – 35:53–39:20
- Miss Universe Elk Death – 39:46–41:17
- Turkey Prank Video – 42:29–47:37
- Conjoined Twins Segment – 50:50–62:08
- AI Chatbot Death – 63:29–65:16
Closing Notes
Packed with edgy humor and wild rabbit trails, this episode is a blend of comedian life, animal oddities, and absurd social commentary. Zac keeps it quick-witted, while Ian and Andrew dish out gut-busting anecdotes and riffs—making this a chaotic but memorable installment of Morning Zoo.