0043. Dave Temple and Mike Recine

Summary

Zac Amico's Morning Zoo – Episode Summary

Episode 0043: Dave Temple and Mike Recine
Date: September 12, 2025
Podcast: Zac Amico's Morning Zoo (GaS Digital Network)
Guests: Dave Temple, Mike Recine

Overview

This wild, freewheeling episode of Zac Amico’s Morning Zoo dives headfirst into Hollywood controversies, sitcom nostalgia, bizarre news, and the hazards of public transit. Hosts Zac, Dave Temple, and Mike Recine blend irreverent humor with dark takes on notorious scandals, weird viral stories, and backstage tales from TV and comedy. The conversation hops from old sitcoms to recent shocking crimes to the perils of background acting—punctuated with laughs, cynicism, and brutal honesty.

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Key Topics & Insights

1. Hollywood Scandals & Charlie Sheen’s Memoir ([01:34]–[06:34])

• Charlie Sheen’s Admission: The group discusses Charlie Sheen’s new memoir, where he admits to sex with men, particularly during his crack-using days.
• Speculation & Hollywood Abuse: Zac references long-running Hollywood rumors, including Corey Haim’s allegations against Sheen.
• “People don’t know who Crisco is. It’s who sung the Thong Song.” – Zac [05:01]
• Hollywood’s Predatory Nature: Dave jokes, “Why not just blame show business—like everyone in Hollywood is doing it.” [04:18]
• They riff on how rampant abuse and cover-ups run in entertainment, drawing comparisons with other infamous stars.

2. Sitcoms, Child Stars, and Disney/Nickelodeon Trauma ([07:12]–[13:33])

• Two and a Half Men, Child Stars: Discussion about child actor Angus T. Jones’ turn to religion and how Hollywood warps people.
• “It’s weird that show business does that to you—either you go really religious or you go really demonic.” – Dave [08:29]
• Latina Moms & Abuse Avoidance: Anecdote from Dave about Latina Nickelodeon stars being protected by ever-present mothers.
• Personal Child-Acting Tales: Zac talks about doing a bit for the Amanda Show and a strange Nickelodeon commercial, joking about never having been molested in the industry.

3. Background Acting & Extra Work Realities ([13:56]–[18:12])

• The Hustle & the Weirdos: Dave and Zac share stories about being extras—full of pro-union pain-in-the-ass folks tracking every pay bonus and “fog machine fee.”
• “Those people are why I stopped doing it. Like, I don’t want to be this person that’s complaining over $150 and some food.” – Dave [15:10]
• Anecdotes include an on-set beef between a cosplaying Jedi and a tough New Yorker, and strategies for getting better extra gigs.

4. Sitcom Revival, New TV, & Casting Rants ([22:13]–[25:19])

• The Office & Paper (spinoff): The guys talk remakes/spinoffs of The Office, character evolutions, and casting choices.
• Pam Beesly Hate: “You know, there’s a lot of Pam haters out there.” – Zac [23:13]
• Hollywood Types: Discussion of actors hiding ethnicity for casting, and the box-checking that shapes modern sitcoms.

5. News Deep Dives: Immigration Raid at Hyundai Plant ([28:05]–[30:16])

• ICE Raid Gone Wrong: Dave recaps ICE raiding a Hyundai plant, mistakenly detaining 300+ legal Korean workers.
• “These Mexicans are high as hell—get them in the cr—get them in the truck! We got a bunch of Mexicans with Down syndrome in Hyundai.” – Zac [28:47]
• Personal Blue-Collar Stories: Zac and Dave riff on dodging cops at work, with darkly funny tales from their landscaping and welding backgrounds.

6. Public Transit Horrors

A. Knife Attack on Light Rail ([34:19]–[39:47])

• Zac recounts the viral (but underreported) video of a woman being stabbed on the Charlotte light rail. The group discusses media suppression, mental illness, and random violence.
• “The mayor... is encouraging sites to take the video down because they think it sends the wrong message.” – Zac [35:14]
• “You know what, the light rail does attract the craziest of people. There’s no barometer of entry...” – Dave [35:53]

B. Dart Attack on Light Rail ([39:10]–[51:01])

• Dave describes a recent case of a commuter shooting another with a dart via slingshot.
• “Who did it? That guy holding the slingshot sideways.” – Zac [39:47]
• They mock how random and bizarre these incidents are, noting how the light rail seems especially cursed.

7. Libraries: Masturbators & Community Centers ([52:13]–[58:14])

• Lifetime Library Ban: Wisconsin man is “banned from every library in the world” after repeated lewd behavior; hosts marvel at the logistics and culture of public libraries.
• Library Nostalgia: Mike reminisces about getting his kid a library card.
• Printing Porn: Zac and friends recall printing out and drawing porn in libraries as teens, and the odd characters that hang out there.

8. Bodycam/Violence Videos & Policing Debates ([59:11]–[65:32])

• Bodycam Footage Realism: Discussion of violent arrest videos, suicide-by-cop, and why tasers sometimes fail.
• “When you electrify black people, they turn into superheroes. They have a lot of electricity-based powers.” – Zac [65:30, in characteristically dark humor]
• They debate the point of using lethal vs. non-lethal force, suicide by cop, and dehumanization in viral policing videos.

9. Human Interest: Unusual Couples & Identity ([65:36]–[68:01])

• Interabled Couple Spotlight: Zac shares a story of a very small woman (“Taffy”) and her relationship, riffing on public perception and messaging about difference, love, and disability.
• “Hi, I’m Taffy... People confuse me with being a child all the time...” – Taffy [65:59]

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• [04:18] Dave: "Why not just blame show business—like everyone in Hollywood is doing it."
• [05:01] Zac: “People don’t know who Crisco is. It’s who sung the Thong Song.”
• [08:29] Dave: "It’s weird that show business does that to you—either you go really religious or you just go really demonic."
• [35:14] Zac: "The mayor... is encouraging sites to take the video down because they think it sends the wrong message."
• [39:47] Zac: “Who did it? That guy holding the slingshot sideways.”
• [52:13] Zac: “Wisconsin man banned from every library in the world.”
• [65:30] Zac (joking darkly): “I'm pretty sure when you electrocute black people they turn into superheroes.”
• [65:59] Taffy (Video Clip): "People confuse me with being a child all the time. My height is 3-7. I love Taffy despite her height..."

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Timestamps for Major Segments

• [01:34] — Charlie Sheen Memoir/Hollywood Predation
• [07:12] — Two and a Half Men/Child Stars
• [13:56] — Extra & Background Acting Anecdotes
• [22:13] — Sitcoms Today (Paper, Office, etc)
• [28:05] — ICE Raid on Hyundai Plant
• [34:19] — Charlotte Light Rail Stabbing
• [39:10] — Dart Attack on Light Rail
• [52:13] — World Library Ban
• [59:11] — Police Tape, Non-Lethal Force, Dark Humor
• [65:36] — “Taffy” Human Interest Story

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Tone & Language

The tone is outrageous, darkly comic, and improvisational—targeted at a listener base used to both offensive humor and deeply cynical takes on news and pop culture. Speakers are open about trauma, mental health, violence, and societal decline, always blending shock value with genuine insight.

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Final Thoughts

This episode is a quintessential “Morning Zoo”—raucous, irreverent, and a little unhinged, mashing true crime, industry gossip, dystopian headlines, and raunchy asides into a chaotic and entertaining hour. Despite the darkness, warmth and camaraderie emerge, especially in the reminiscence about showbiz and childhood.

For listeners who want the wildest cross-section of true crime, freak news, and stand-up comic despair—there’s not a moment wasted.

Transcript

[A]

Fill her up. You're listening to the GAS Digital Network. Wake up, it's time to go. Zach Amico's got a show. Animals are here to play. Jokes and guests to start your day. Tell the sandman no more sleep Eat some eggs and cook some beef Laughter's waiting, don't be shy Stretch your legs and touch the sky Grab a coffee and join the cre You. It's a. M. Well, hello and good morning. Happy Monday to all the zoo files out there. It's your old pal cousin Zach welcoming you to another edition of Zach Amico's Morning Zoo here on the GAS Digital Network. Across the table from me, two very funny, two very kind, and two very wonderful gentlemen from. No need for apologies here on the network, it's Dave Temple.

[B]

What's going on, everybody? How we doing?

[A]

How you doing, bud?

[B]

Good. Can we talk about these sweet curls you got going on? Nice little baby Zach here, man.

[A]

Yeah, yeah. Letting it grow out a little. Seeing what it. Seeing what to do.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Thank you. I appreciate that. You look adorable, too.

[B]

Thank you, man.

[A]

And next to him, from Racine time, it is our good buddy Mike Racine. How you doing, brother?

[C]

I'm good.

[A]

Very, very.

[C]

No complaints. Good to be here.

[A]

No worries. Thank you very much, guys, for being here. Let's get right into some news. We'll do plugs in just a little. We have been following a number of stories here on the show, but, hey, new one. Believe it or not, Charlie Sheen has admitted to having sex with men in his new. In his new memoir, I think we figured.

[B]

Yeah, Yeah.

[C]

I thought everybody kind of knew that.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

About him. Yeah, I. I think doesn't.

[C]

Isn't he HIV positive, too?

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Tiger blood.

[A]

He calls it.

[B]

Tiger. He prefers.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. That's because when you. When you a guy in the ass, it feels great. Yeah. So, Shannon, you want to give us some deets?

[D]

So basically he says that around 2015, I believe, was when he started doing crack, and that's what led into him.

[C]

Oh, I blame the crack.

[A]

Yep.

[D]

That's what led into him.

[B]

He started doing dudes in the crack.

[D]

And then he said that then in moments when he wasn't high, he started to question himself. He's like, what am I even doing? And whatever. And then he's like, eh, whatever. I had a great time. It was a lot of fun. No big deal.

[A]

So.

[C]

So he was smoking crack and that. But he only did it when he smoked crack.

[A]

See, I am very suspicious of this time.

[C]

Yeah, it was like the cigarette at a Wedding or something.

[A]

Yeah, I don't. Yeah, I don't usually do this. I. I'm very questionable about this timeline because I think he definitely was one of the people that one of the Coreys. Oh, you think so? Temple, Are you familiar Corey Haim?

[B]

Absolutely.

[A]

So I am pretty sure I have caught wind that one of them got fucked. Maybe not against his will, but finagled into.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[A]

Butt sex with Charlie Sheen back in the 80s.

[B]

Okay. Oh, way pre. Before. Yeah. This whole crack use.

[A]

Yeah, because it's for. My buddy has a theory. So they, you know, they never said who molested the Coreys, but if you look at when they were in those. The one was in Friday 13th. The producer of that movie got into some accusations later and I would not be shocked if he was involved. And then I swear to God, Shannon, I could be wrong, but I swear to God there's a story of one of the Coreys getting fucked by Charlie Sheen with Crisco.

[C]

You think Woody Allen is ever like, why is everyone mad at me?

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Out in the open.

[B]

It's also weird to even blame crack at this point. Why not just blame show business like everyone in Hollywood is doing it.

[A]

So just like I got a better idea. I ran out of hot ladies to fuck. I got bored. I got bored with hot pussy and I had to move on to do that.

[B]

Yeah. Didn't John Travolta use that? Excuse me.

[D]

There are allegations that said when he was 19, he is accused of allegedly sexually assaulting 13 year old Corey Haim on the set of 1986 film Lucas.

[A]

That's it. Could you look up Chris Go? Because I swear to God, Chris Go's involved. People don't know who Crisco is. It's who sung the Thong song.

[B]

I just like how you did it. Like a Google search where he's like, oh, it does not. This article does not include Crisco. Move on.

[A]

Because then that makes more sense why they were afraid to come out against him because he was still a pretty. Like had the biggest show on TV.

[B]

Even back then in 80s.

[A]

No, but I mean two and a half Men was huge.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[D]

I found it. Feldman specifically alleged, quote, he told me Charlie bent me over in between two trailers and put Crisco oil on my butt and raped me in broad daylight. And anybody could have walked by. Anybody could have seen it.

[B]

It was a joke.

[A]

Yeah, it's like, you know they say George Clooney loves to prank people on set. Yeah, he put a. He like put like water in between the two trailers, and he went, ooh, a shiny. A shiny coin. He bent over and then he took those 20 minutes to spread Crisco along his asshole, take his erect penis out, penetrate him and ejaculate inside him. And he went, you got sheened.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

But the broad daylight makes it so much worse because, you know, I imagine, like, if you get raped in Hollywood, you're like, all right, that's kind of the game, you know?

[A]

Yeah, yeah.

[C]

But broad daylight, yeah.

[A]

Whatever happens in the room happens in the room, Harvey.

[B]

Right, Right.

[A]

Yeah. Well, I think he's saying they were between two trailers, so I think it was, like, private enough. You're on the lot. I guess it's private enough, kind of. But still. Yeah, it's. You know what? It's not a great way to start your day.

[B]

It's also probably a joke. Like between two ferns.

[A]

Yeah, yeah.

[B]

Between two trailers. Yeah. Oh, you think we're having a cigarette. No cigarettes going up your ass.

[A]

God bless. Shout out to fucking. I love you very much. Stupid Dalton Pruitt. Dalton made me laugh so hard one time because they were making a Ricky and Lucy movie, and he walks in here. He's like, man, I saw the set, I saw two trailers, and they said, ricky and Lucy. They must be shooting that movie here. I went, those are toilets, Dalton. He goes, what? I went, they can't put men's room and women's room on the trailers because everyone will use it. So they put Ricky and Lucy and they're called Honey Wagons.

[B]

Oh, man.

[A]

And he's like, man, I took pictures. I was like, you took pictures of silence.

[B]

Shout out to Dalton.

[A]

So, yeah, I think he's been so. I'm convinced they said, first Ferris Bueller, he didn't sleep for, like, three days to look like that. No, I think he showed up like that.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[A]

I think, if anything, he's just not done up in that movie.

[B]

Yeah. What?

[C]

Ferris Bueller?

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Charlie Sheen's in that.

[A]

Yeah. He's like a. Isn't. Am I thinking of that? Or is he in Fast Times at Ridgemont High?

[D]

No, he isn't. Ferris Bueller.

[A]

Yeah, there he is. I've been watching some old Two and a Half Men, I gotta tell you. Really holds up. Really?

[B]

How do you think?

[A]

Especially when they bring in Ryan Stiles.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

As Alan's new wife's new husband. Oh, that's funny. It's a great comedic. Everyone on is really good.

[B]

How do you think that kid made it through the fire without that kid did bad.

[A]

Yeah. That kid's like.

[B]

He got touched a lot too. On set or.

[A]

No, that kid's like some weird Christian now. He's got a big beard and he talks about how Hollywood's evil. He wouldn't do like the last few seasons because he's like a convert. He's some type of like, not like run of the mill, like Found Price.

[B]

It's weird that show business does that to you. Either you go really religious or you just go really demonic. You know what I mean?

[A]

I'd imagine the family was afraid of him getting sheened and that's what pushed him towards that. Yeah, there was.

[B]

I don't. Shit. My wife was just telling me about this too. There was some Latina actress who was like, big in the Nickelodeon space.

[A]

Okay. Who.

[B]

People were wondering, how does she avoid it? And she was like, I'm Latina. My mom did not allow me to go anywhere by myself. Like, my mom was there the entire time hovering over all of that shit, you know?

[A]

Yeah, I think that's how you gotta be. Yeah.

[C]

So where was she when Selena got killed?

[B]

I was just having a cigarette.

[A]

Yeah. Shannon, can you look? I think his name is Angus.

[C]

Isn't that crazy, though? You're like, everybody. You're like, I'm enjoying this TV show, but everybody. Everyone who made it is a child rapist.

[B]

Isn't that wild?

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Oh, yeah. I mean, that looks like that could have been the progression of the. I mean, it is the character, but it looks like the actual boyfriend.

[A]

For a while he had like a. Could have been this like Amish religiousy beard.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[C]

Angus T. Jones, right?

[A]

There it is. Yeah. His life out of the public eye, having stepped away from acting after his time with Two and a Half Men to pursue a more private life and attend college. Makes. Where.

[C]

And he's like, hollywood is evil. And everybody's. Yeah, yeah, buddy.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

It's real evil.

[A]

Yeah. We also kept the money cares.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

There it is.

[B]

Oh, the big Everybody.

[C]

Everybody just likes.

[B]

Oh, is he barefoot?

[A]

Wow.

[B]

Is he a grounder? Oh, he went full hippie.

[A]

I think I. And it's also. This is gonna sound so gay, but I'm a sucker for the sitcom format. Yeah, I enjoy it. Like, I. I love the mid century modern so fucking much on Hulu. It's just gay Golden Girls. Okay.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

It's Nathan Lane as Dorothy.

[B]

Do you think we could get back to that? Do you think there's a way to introduce children to that multicam, you know, I don't know.

[A]

I'm trying to do the new the.

[C]

Don'T even make like you ever are you.

[A]

How's that? Oh, the paper there's fun. It's weird because. Well, we'll get back into this, but I like this conversation. I feel like there was a generation of kids that knew it from Nickelodeon. Lewis's son grew up on fucking all those sitcoms like Wizards of Waverly Place shit that I like way past our tenure. Yes, but they grew up and they know this is a half an hour sitcom. This is the format. A storyline. B storyline.

[C]

Multicam.

[A]

Yeah, they know what it is.

[C]

Studio audience.

[A]

I don't know if kids now will have that.

[B]

Well, I think most of those people are shying away from it. My daughter was into that stuff also. But you would watch, especially on the Disney stuff, everyone would get into trouble and it would shut down the show. Icarly, Jesse. All of these shows that were popular. Drake and Josh, like, these kids would grow up and they'd be loaded up with cash and they would get in so much trouble.

[C]

They should have been like only Latinas. From now on, Nickelodeon is the all.

[B]

Latina now with strong maternal presence, please.

[A]

Now it's called Nega. You looking at. It's just so sad because everybody knows.

[C]

Amanda Bynes is like this, you know, cat faced. But she was so talented.

[B]

Right?

[C]

That Amanda show was so good.

[A]

I've said this before. I did a bit for the Amanda show when I was a kid.

[C]

Oh, yeah.

[A]

Because I used to act. I did a thing for the Amanda show at the Waldorf Historia.

[C]

And then imagine your little headshot when.

[A]

He was a kid.

[B]

Oh, that's what I saw as soon.

[A]

As I put the camera on him. Yeah, I saw my Instagram.

[B]

I have one kid, Zach. He looks a lot. He's looking more like young kid Zack again.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, I have. I have. I have that. That headshot from. I think this is like seventh grade, but I did that. And then I worked for the fucking. I was a security guard for film screenings and I found that I was working for the Weinstein Company.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

I just can't get molested.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Always the brides. Oh, no, that's kindergarten.

[C]

That's cute.

[A]

It's a black. It's a real headshot.

[B]

Although you look like you were still delivering zingers at that age.

[A]

No, zingers is what my parents told me to call you.

[B]

Exactly. Yeah. Weird, weird racial jokes coming out of that kid in the back.

[C]

Should we make a children's show?

[A]

I would love to.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

I would. Really. Genu. There it Is. Yeah, there it is.

[C]

Okay.

[A]

There's the old. The old Canadian Todo Cheeto.

[B]

They'd have had their way with that kid, though. Like, I get it. You were trying your best, but, like, you're lucky. You're lucky.

[A]

Well, apparently, my mom's Latina. She watched like, a whole Latina.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

I did one commercial for Nickelodeon when I was a kid, and it was in a gym, and it was for Smell O Vision.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

They had, like, a campaign where you would get a card and you could smell, and it was us working out our scratching finger. And it was a coach, and I was supposed to be in the middle, and the coach yelled at me. Yeah. But I was the biggest kid, and it was all, like, little shrimpy kids.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And one of the moms, not realizing I was the featured performer, made a stink with all the parents, including my mom, who she not know was my mom. Like, they need to move that big kid out of the front. We can't see our children. And she tried to start, like, a coup. And then the director had to go. He's. We're paying him more than your child.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

To be the star of the commercial.

[B]

That was always weird to me. I used to do background work in the city to stay alive. So much Law and Order. And I definitely did, like. Like, a lawn or SVU where it was, like, weird that the kids were there with their parents, but they would still pair them up with an adult to be their parent in the park. And it's like, this is weird. Their parents are here. No one knows me. I'm not an actor. There's no need to pair me with a child to do a scene.

[A]

They just had a kid in the park by itself. They told Dave to sit at this one. No. Exactly.

[C]

They gave him a Chinese kid. For some reason, he's like, mommy.

[A]

No, no, no.

[C]

He's your.

[A]

I just got him on Canal Street.

[B]

You know what that's like, though, to go back to holding and just not talk to your kids?

[A]

Yeah. Extra stuff is really weird. Then you've met a bunch. We know mutual people. I have friends that are like, professional extras, and they know every fucking stipend and every. Like, they're counting minutes.

[B]

Can I tell you something? Those people are why I stopped doing it. Like, I don't want to be this person. Like, I don't want to be this person that's complaining. It's just like, dude, we're here to get 150 bucks and some food, and then we'll.

[A]

Yeah, but they're Getting whatever. They're getting like 550 because they're union.

[B]

Yeah. And that was the thing. They were always like, yeah. There were people who knew, like, nah, you got to take this because you get the voucher and you get the waiver and blah, blah, blah. And then you work your way up.

[A]

Yeah. And then they'd be like, I see a fog machine, that's another $50.

[B]

Right? And I'm like.

[A]

Or I see this like, my buddy's a magician and he does extra work and he'll get hired to be a magician in the background of parties. He's like, if one fucking card comes out, that's $250.

[C]

Wow.

[A]

That's sleight of hand magic. That's a special skill. Sure. It says in the contract, special skills. This is the. He knows it fucking all. And he brings it all.

[B]

Because they're pains in the ass to the pas on set.

[A]

Oh, yeah, I've been on both sides of it.

[B]

PAs don't know what the fuck is going on. They're here just to make a nut also. And now you're like, excuse me, where's the. I don't know. No one tells me anything. I was just told to keep you alone.

[A]

Like 75 people texting you that they have to piss. Grown adults. I have to pee. What do I do? Yeah, I don't fucking know. Yeah, piss your pants. I don't care. Die. Die in sepsis. I fucking hate you.

[B]

And it's like the worst people. I never forget. I did a commercial. This was like a Facebook commercial that we did overnight in Grant with the big.

[C]

Because they probably have like egos about it, right?

[A]

Grand Central.

[B]

Yes, but they're also just weirdos. Like I never forget this guy. He was a black dude dressed like a full on Jedi, down to the gloves. He's got the brown cape, he's got the weird little sword. And maybe they asked him to do that, I don't know. But there was also like this really hood New York dude, like straight up, like old fashioned mop guy, you know, Yankee hat low, just big guy. You could tell. Like he's probably should have a pelly Pelly jacket on or something like that. And all of a sudden there's like this commotion and the big New York guy has got the nerd hemmed up by his fucking cloak and he's like slamming him up against the wall. Motherfucker, I'll fucking kill you. I'll fucking. And it's funny. Cause again, PAs don't wanna get involved in Any of this shit.

[A]

Chad, is this table falling apart, literally.

[B]

Oh, yes, yes, yes. That leg is collapsing under there. I thought they were doing it.

[A]

Come save us.

[B]

Yeah. There's not going to be anything he can do unless he has like 2x4 or something right now.

[A]

Oh, wow.

[B]

All right, I'll try my best to keep telling the story.

[C]

I'm going to. Actually, I could hold the table up. I think you got to kick that leg to the.

[A]

For. For those of you listening, I don't think my fatness broke this table. No. I think it was every. All of us. Very careful in case it did.

[B]

Yeah. It is weird, though. It just kept twisting. All right, hands off, Hands off.

[A]

All right, we'll be very careful. Jorge, you're on notice in case that happens again. Yeah, that has never happened.

[B]

No, no. It was strange.

[C]

No, the fast. The bolts must be.

[B]

Yes or something. It was. There's no bolts in here. Oh, not at all. Okay. Yeah, it's like a carney ride. That's what it felt like. It's just like. Is this supposed to be doing this? Let's just keep having fun.

[A]

Who. Dude, I swear to God, if that. If Lewis was still the host of the show and the table was broken.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

First of all, I would be immediately blamed.

[B]

Yeah, right, right, right.

[A]

I broke. I could be in another room and I would have broken this table.

[C]

Right.

[A]

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[B]

Hood guy's got the Jedi hemmed up, right? And the PAs again, they're like little white girls. Hey, hey, hey. You guys settle that down or we're going to kick you off set. And the hood guy looks back and he yells at everybody. I'm trying to tell this motherfucker to hold it down. And he not holding it down. And it was like. I remember looking and feeling bad for the Jedi guy, where I'm like, yeah, well, he probably doesn't understand what you mean. You know what I mean? Like, if you told him that, that kid has no idea what you mean. And I think he was playing the guitar or doing something, and the guy just wanted him to be quiet, okay. Cause it's an overnight shoot, so we're sitting in holding, and everyone's kind of, like, groggy.

[A]

Hey, Jedi, if you gonna pee, sit down. I don't need your piss particles in my air.

[B]

I'm trying to tell this motherfucker to hold it down. And he not holding it down. You can see, like, the absolute terror in Jedi's eyes. You know what I mean? And he's confused. I don't know what the fuck this guy wants me to do.

[A]

Yeah. Because we've talked about Radio man before, but there's also that redheaded kid that's in everything.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

You know what I'm talking about? It's like a chubby redheaded kid with not, like, kind of curly, like, red Afro. He's an extra in full, like, currently.

[B]

Or are we talking about back in.

[A]

The day, like, 2000s?

[B]

Okay, okay.

[A]

Like, super bad era.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

I would say this kid is an extra in fucking. I wanna even say American Pie on. I don't think he's ever spoken in a film.

[B]

God bless him, man.

[A]

But I bet you he fucking gets a decent little chunk of cheese.

[B]

I wanted to achieve. I wanted to achieve that kind of. Cause I would do that to try to get rent. Like, I would literally book, like, a series of 150, $200 spots and be like, all right, cool. I got my rent. You know what? I. It would take so long to get paid.

[A]

Yeah, it was like a month and a half.

[C]

Yeah, it's like the culture, it seems like.

[B]

Right, right, right.

[C]

Yeah, yeah. And then you ask them, like, this is how we do it.

[B]

I just. I just got a.

[C]

It's typically three to four weeks.

[B]

It doesn't piss me.

[A]

I just got an email about a.

[B]

Taping that I'm doing this month. And they say at least they let you know in advance. But they're like, yeah, you're not going to get paid right away. And you're like, that's insane. Like, it's almost to the point, I don't want to do your taping like any other show. You just get your money.

[C]

You're like, I'll be going to the Comic Strip where I get paid, where I get 20 the night of.

[A]

Thank you very much and discount on my drink. Yeah, exactly. What was the other. We put a pin in something.

[B]

The first story.

[A]

Yeah. No, we were talking about kids.

[C]

Nickelodeon.

[A]

Nickelodeon sitcom. Oh, the paper. The Office, I guess. Sequel. Yeah, I was talking about on my trick because. So basically we're watching. It's fine. There's some funny stuff. There's some. There's a character I don't like. I just think she's. She doesn't work on the show. I. But I was like, don't forget, like, when we watch, like, that first season of Parks and Rec or the Office, like, it's a drastically different show.

[C]

Right.

[A]

So if this show is a success, I would say a third of these people will not be on the good iteration of it. So it's almost like watching them. Even when you watch first season of Seinfeld, it doesn't work.

[B]

Right.

[A]

It's not there yet.

[C]

Right, right.

[B]

But that's a good sign if a character. If you don't like a character, because they. They. I don't know whether they do that shit on purpose because I don't know whether you guys felt that way with the Office. I didn't like the girl. Like, I didn't like the main girl. Yeah. And it was just mainly because of that story arc of, like, your boyfriend works in the warehouse and you're kind of up here.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Flirting with this other guy in the thing.

[A]

You know, there's a lot of Pam haters out there.

[B]

Yeah. Yeah. I didn't like that.

[C]

She needs to put on a hijab.

[A]

And I'm flirting with.

[B]

But see, that was the other thing. She wasn't that hot. Hey, maybe that's an unpopular opinion, but I don't think she was.

[C]

She's cute, though.

[A]

Yeah. I mean, compared to the. If you're in Scranton.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, exactly. Exactly. But she's also like the. The Scranton that, like. If you watch body cam videos.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

She's the girl that is causing the riot at this weird little apartment complex.

[A]

Who's the redhead on the Office with the. The the drunk lady.

[B]

I don't know everybody's name on the office, but I don't know who you're talking about.

[A]

Her. Meredith.

[C]

Meredith.

[A]

Yeah, Meredith. Every once in a while I'll be like, I've had a few Merediths in my life. Yeah, I can think of a couple. Okay.

[B]

Absolutely.

[A]

And then. So. Yeah, it's fine. It's. I hope it gets there. I mean, Alex Edelman's on it, so I'm pulling for him.

[C]

You're pulling for him?

[A]

Yeah. I like Alex. He's a nice guy. When we were all. Okay, schmendrix. Okay, sure. A little judgy.

[B]

Right, right, right.

[A]

You know, did he tell me to stop doing ethnic accents on stage because I wasn't going to be successful? Sure he did. Well, that's why he's on the office now. I'm talking to you two assholes. And they're definitely, like. You can see. They want him to be Chris Pratt.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Alex there.

[A]

That you could. They want him to be, like, the goofy guy. The goofy guy. And I don't know if it worked. Yeah, he's very. You could tell. It's almost like they're telling him, hey, could you, like, not Jew it up? Like they're trying to hide his nebbishness and make it more, like, Midwestern. Yeah. Quirky. Okay.

[B]

Because it's supposed to be in Ohio.

[A]

Pennsylvania. Are they Scranton? It's the same office.

[B]

The office. I thought this one was about a paper company in Ohio.

[A]

Oh, yeah, You're. I'm sorry. It's. They. In the beginning, they go to the old office.

[B]

Right, right, right.

[A]

And then they try to figure out.

[B]

Who bought the pa, Which. This is gonna sound like an ignorant question, but are there Jews in Ohio? Do they hang out?

[A]

There's one. Apparently. He's hiding it. He's hiding it hard.

[B]

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[A]

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[B]

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[A]

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[B]

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[A]

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[B]

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[A]

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[B]

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[A]

Did you watch Woody Allen on Bill Maher?

[C]

I saw like, a couple clips of.

[A]

It, but very weird.

[C]

Really?

[A]

Yeah. First, it felt like a father and son having a talk that they should have Already had, like, it was just like they're two. They speak the same language.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

And it was odd. And, yeah, it was just like him being quirky and nevishy, but not in a, like, fun Larry David way. More just like, oh, this guy sounds like a chore.

[B]

Right?

[A]

Like, they went through this thing where he hates sunlight.

[C]

Woody Allen.

[A]

Yeah. He's. I hate. I don't like it. It's. It's bad. It's carcinogenic. I try to avoid the sun. Okay. Of course I tweeted. But he likes a daughter. Thank you.

[B]

Thank you.

[A]

But, yeah, the whole thing was kind of. And then it is weird to like, I don't know, because.

[C]

Do you watch Woody Allen? You go, that guy rapes children. Does that bother you? No, it doesn't bother you.

[A]

So he's a bad dude. He's. Whatever he did was not good.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

But I feel like he. He would have got caught again.

[C]

He would have got caught again.

[A]

He married her and stayed with her and had a family.

[C]

So, like, it's almost like that's my last. My last job.

[A]

Yeah. Yeah. He came out of retirement for one last. One last grift. Yeah. By the way, that would be a great, like a motions 11. But it's just old comics coming out for one last, like, right wing grift. Like, we're gonna do one great podcast together, guys.

[B]

You know, I never like to start any problems, but I don't know if you've seen those shows Chrissy Mayer's doing with us.

[A]

I was literally gonna say, all right, guys, we got one content house left in us.

[C]

What's she doing?

[A]

She's got, like a content house.

[B]

It's like a hotel or something. But she's doing shows there with, like, her Kumia Gino Visconti. Like that whole house of comics, you know?

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. We had Gino on the other day, and I think we got him to go five whole minutes without bringing up Covid. Oh, man, it was nice. Yeah, he's still on it.

[B]

Yo, I hate to. I want to pitch the concept of a story. I don't know whether this was on the dock or not, but did you guys hear about this? Hyundai's plant got raided by ice.

[A]

No, please.

[B]

Okay?

[A]

Please, please.

[B]

So there's a Hyundai plant somewhere down south. I don't know what state exactly, but one of the biggest raids this weekend. 475 employees rounded up by ICE. So obviously this really fucks up Honda's month, right?

[A]

Yeah, yeah.

[B]

But what's crazy about it is 300 of the people who were snatched up are Koreans. Like, they were looking for Latinos, and they just snatched up a bunch of Koreans who were here legally working for Honda.

[A]

Oh, yeah. So they're like, these Mexicans are high as hell. Get them in the cr. Get them in the truck. We got a bunch of Mexicans with Down syndrome in Hyundai.

[B]

So it's just a thing. Like, Korea obviously is not happy. You know what I mean? Trump's. What's the name? Is out of control, and it's just a big mess that he created on his own. But the fact they're just, like, locking up 300 Koreans because you think that they are Mexicans and they can't talk.

[A]

Their way out of it is hilarious. I'm sure, by the way, I'm sure they all spoke English.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And they were like, I'm not Mexican. Sure you're not, pal. Sure you're not. All right. Have tacos later.

[B]

Oh, yeah, they got a charter, all of these dudes. A flight back to Korea, like, and treat them properly or whatever. But, yeah, this is wild.

[A]

Yeah, they're gonna need to go to McDonald's with Trump for that one. Holy. I remember one of my dad's old.

[C]

Jobs getting the other 175 employees.

[B]

Oh, those were probably cuz. Excuse me. The plant isn't built yet. That's what it was. They were down there building a plant for Hyundai. And, yeah, I'm sure there were. There were some illegals, but, yeah, 300 of them were just Koreans.

[A]

I remember years ago, at one of my dad's old job sites, there being a drone, like, just farting around and everybody. Like somebody flying a drone and then just fucking SUVs roll in. And they were. They were. They were.

[B]

Is that how they had.

[A]

They had the drone? They had a tip. Wow. And not everybody got arrested, but a lot of people didn't come to work the next day. Yeah, we had this guy, Jesus, that worked for my dad in no English, and my first ever day working there. It was a welding shop at Bayonne. He comes up to me and he asked how to say headache, because he wanted an Advil from the office. And I went, oh, say my vagina hurts. I'm like 16. I'm an asshole. So he walked into an office full of my dad's and goes, zach says, my vagina hurt. So I was good to go there. But one time, because when you work in welding. I've explained this before, the cops come sometimes to arrest one of your co workers for domestic Violence, really? Or not paying child support. Okay, okay. But yeah, every once in a while when my dad owned the shop underneath the house I lived in as a kid, he had to ask the cops to please take them out the back door so that my 5 year old son doesn't wonder why my guys get arrested every month while a woman with a bag of peas on her face cries.

[B]

Still one of the best jobs. I used to work landscaping and we shared our garage with roofers. So, you know, it's just two jobs that are just all ex cons and, you know, drug addicts and stuff like that. But some of the best years of my life, like, and the most educational, you know what I mean? Like, wow. Like, you know, just learn how to get over, get out of work, all kinds of crazy shit, man.

[A]

And one time we're working, he's the cops come to arrest somebody for fucking hitting the trick. I'm sure Jesus is working with me and my dad. And my dad just goes, Jesus ins. And Jesus is fuck. I mean, it's like in a cartoon where somebody's there and then they're just dust. He's gone, right? My dad forgot that. He told him. So they're cleaning up. This is like seven hours later. They clean it up at the end of the day in these giant pipes and they're moving them and they put one down and you're ow, he was in it. Geez. They're like, what the fuck are you doing in here? He goes, polycia.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And they're like, no. Oh, that was a joke from seven hours ago. He goes, okay, went back to work.

[B]

They are the best at that, like hiding for long amounts of times like that. Cause I forgot what I was watching, where it was showing their ingenuity of them knowing how to make a lot of trapdoors and shit like that. But did you see the guy? One of those guys that escaped to prison outside of New Orleans. Okay, but there's footage of him hiding in a trash can in someone's yard. And he would have gotten away, but he couldn't stay there long enough. He didn't have the discipline to just stay in the trash can. And then he gets out and moves. And they're like, hey, we just saw him move. He was in there for like 20 minutes.

[A]

That raccoon's huge.

[B]

Where in that raccoon get a jumpsuit?

[A]

Hey, guys. This episode is brought to you by Prize Picks. You and I make decisions every day. But on Prize Picks, being right can get you paid. Don't miss the excitement this season on prize picks, where it's good to be right? Guys, it's football season, and if you want to make some picks. I don't know, whoever your favorite players are, whatever their current stats are on the app, check it out. Prize packs even offers injury reboots. So if one of your players has to leave the field in the first half and can't come back, it doesn't count as a loss. Download the app today and use my Code Zoo to get $50 in lineups after you play your first $5 lineup. That's code ZOO to get $50 in lineups AFTER you play your first $5 Lineup. Prize picks. It's good to be right. Let's get back into the show. Not to be a complete bomber, but did you guys also see the. The lady getting. What was it like getting stabbed on the light rail?

[C]

I'm liberal, so I didn't hear anything about it. I didn't hear a single.

[A]

Yeah, yeah.

[B]

What light rail? A Jersey light rail.

[A]

No, I want to say Chicago.

[B]

Okay.

[C]

I could be like North Carolina.

[A]

Yeah, that's Charlotte, I think.

[C]

Charlotte.

[A]

Oh, wow. So, dude, I mean, it. It's one of the. It's a real tough one. Really. Chick in her work uniform scrolling on the phone, big gentleman behind her hoodie and dreadlocks. And he. You just watch him slowly open a pocket knife, look at her look back at the knife, stand up and just. Wow. Kills her.

[B]

Wow.

[A]

And the. And I'm Shannon. I'm gonna need you to fact check me on this because I would like to keep my ignorance in check on this one. It's gonna be tough.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

The mayor and other people are encouraging sites to take the video down because they think it sends the wrong message and that this is a mentally ill person who committed the crime and that they don't want to raise people's bigot. Bigoted thoughts by the profiles of the murderer and murderee. Am I. Am I kind of somewhere with that? No.

[B]

You're speaking so vague, I don't even know you're saying anymore.

[A]

Dude. And it's. He fucking gets it. And then he just walks off the train with a bloody knife dripping on the floor.

[B]

You know what? The light rail does attract the craziest of people because there's no barometer of entry to get on the platform.

[A]

Yeah, same with subway. No, no, no, no, no.

[B]

Light rails are usually above ground and you can just walk up so anybody can hang out there. You know what I mean? Like, you don't. You could just come from the park. Like it's bad because. Are you going to show the video?

[A]

I don't know. Shannon. Shannon.

[D]

I can't find one that's like.

[A]

They don't have. I saw it on. Editable, mostly unedited. Take it down. But they show up until. I mean, if you want to see. Up until.

[D]

Okay. I enjoy it. Just kind of like pauses at the moment. But I'll play it here.

[B]

God bless the guy who's running around building the same light rail in every city, too.

[D]

I found a better one. Hold on one sec. Sorry.

[B]

Is that the guy? He's got AirPods.

[A]

No, no, he's. He's got a big red hoodie.

[C]

It was hard to like.

[A]

I literally.

[C]

I googled like, bus.

[B]

Wow.

[A]

I googled like bus.

[C]

And I couldn't.

[A]

She just got here from the Ukraine. She's a Ukraine refugee. And the police look at the guy.

[B]

No, no.

[C]

What?

[B]

This is crazy.

[A]

And by the way, this is not news somehow.

[B]

Oh, my God. No.

[A]

Yeah. Now had the guy behind him, choked him to death saving her.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Fucking. That would be on every goddamn news station in the world right now.

[B]

That's crazy. That's the girl.

[A]

It's beautiful. Wow.

[B]

See, man, I'm wondering what the craziest comments.

[C]

It's not news because a bunch of people are gonna like, make it a thing. They're gonna make it like a. Like a.

[A]

You know, I make it a. This guy's been arrested multiple times for violent crimes. And we gotta stop this fucking. We gotta stop this revolving door. Like, violent crimes only.

[B]

I'm going full on.

[A]

We gotta get rid of anybody that's in there for bullshit and weed. Fucking talking. I don't know anything that's not violent. And then violent crime, it's gotta be hard. Rehabilitation, I'm doing.

[B]

Not even because he's black. I'm going full on. Like Black Mirror. Like last time he went in, they got something on him. And this is his assignment. If he doesn't wanna do more time or have his family be. You know.

[A]

I think he's a crazy person.

[C]

Assignment. Like. Like what?

[A]

From jail?

[B]

Or from like Black Mirror, when they like, made the guy fuck the pig. Otherwise they're like, we're gonna leak all this kind of crazy shit about your family. You know what I mean? Like. Cause there's too much of that kind of shit happening. These random.

[C]

She's just some random lady, Right?

[B]

Right.

[C]

So who's making them kill some random lady, man?

[B]

I don't know. Like, I get in a little bit of conspiracy Theory. Maybe it's somebody who wants that thing shut down or wants bad press on it. But it's a. It's a. It's an angle. It makes more sense than. It's just random. That that guy's just crazy.

[A]

I think it makes more sense.

[B]

And he held it together to get.

[C]

We all.

[B]

We all dressed.

[C]

We all think about stabbing women in the neck on the train every day. We all think about it.

[A]

You know, that's why I don't have an eye.

[B]

Texting. Yeah.

[C]

Yeah, right. Because we all.

[A]

Sometimes I put my keys through my fingers like Wolverine.

[C]

Sure.

[A]

Just to fantasize.

[C]

Just to fantasize about it. You're like, I could take a life right now. They're not even paying attention.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Stickity. Stickity sticky stick.

[B]

But did you see? There was another one like that. I don't know what city this was in. Light rail, Same situation. Guy, black guy, shoots a white guy in the back with a dart. Like he has a dart on a slingshot and he just.

[A]

Oh, thank God it wasn't a blow dart. That'd be too funny.

[B]

But he definitely randomly shoots this white guy in the back. The white guy is walking. The train is pulling up. And the sad part is there's a guy who sees the dart sticking out of his back and is like, oh, right. And like, the train's coming. So he goes to kind of get on, and the guy's kind of pleading with him like, ah, help me. And he's like, ah, fuck.

[A]

Who did it? That guy holding the slingshot sideways.

[B]

Dennis the Minister.

[A]

Freeze, motherfucker.

[B]

Dennis. Yeah, this one. Dennis the minister. Society. For real. But that's what I'm saying. The light rail is. It's crazy and it's too much random shit. And I think this was last week. It's something about the light rail.

[C]

It was pretty quiet before that lady got stabbed, though.

[B]

Exactly.

[C]

Normal.

[A]

Yeah. Yeah. I do think it's very interesting that that that video and that article are being quelled.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Because it just doesn't fit the narrative of.

[B]

And this was what city?

[A]

Liberal goddamn media.

[B]

Charlotte.

[A]

Goddamn Libs.

[B]

You had it. Are you gonna play this one?

[A]

Yeah. Shannon, do you have the dart?

[D]

Just give me one second. Sorry. It kicked me out.

[A]

Don't worry. This is a safe place. You're okay. Don't be afraid.

[B]

You guys still have so much trauma.

[A]

It never leaves. It's like a ghost.

[B]

You guys all got rid of Daddy.

[A]

We still talk. We get drunk and talk about. About Thanksgiving. He was a good man. He loved us. He had his own way of showing it.

[B]

Oh, my God.

[A]

You don't know what his podcast host was like. It's intergenerational podcast trauma. If you had been on his podcast back in the day, it was way harder, man. Shannon, did you find it?

[D]

I'm sorry. I'll come back to it. I lost.

[A]

Don't worry about it. Let's do plugs. Yeah, or I hit that plug music. Mr. Racine. What do you want people to the track out?

[C]

I have a show called Racine Time on every. Every week on YouTube. And I got some road dates coming up. I got Denver and Connecticut and Addison, Texas, and I'm doing something for the New York Comedy festival. And you can see those dates at my website, which is microseen comedy dot com.

[A]

Fantastic. Mr. Temple.

[B]

Follow me at imdave Temple on all social media platforms. There it is right there. Also, check out my podcast here on the network. No need for apologies. Real, real fun time. Last live date before I settle down. Chandler, Arizona. Mic drop comedy. October 18th. October 18th. Chandler, Phoenix, Tempe. Get your tickets, please. Now. I need it.

[A]

Fantastic. Guys, go to my live dates at Punchup Live. Zach Amico. I got dates coming up. I am in Ocean Springs, then Mobile, Alabama, then Hattiesburg, then Pensacola. All those being co headlining dates with myself and Zach Holmes from Jackass 4. It's Zach and Zach. Too fat, too furious. Proven we're two different people. And if you love the show, go to gasdigital.com use my promo code, zoo. You save a little money off your subscription, you get episodes early ad, free and uncensored. You get the live chat, you get the archives. Thousands of episodes of all your favorite gas shows. And most importantly, you get the Friday episode. That's right. We do three of these suckers a week and one is behind that paywall. So if you want the full morning Zoo experience promo code, [e-mail]. and thank you very much for watching the program, Shannon. Was that enough time?

[D]

It's just disappeared.

[A]

Don't worry about it.

[B]

We're gonna see. They're taking them all down.

[D]

You actually, like, you saw it on the screen?

[B]

Yeah, I saw it.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

See, they're doing something, man.

[A]

They're watching us.

[B]

Yeah, there's some sort of conspiracy around these things, man. I don't know.

[A]

All right, so let's move. Doctor tried to convince Undercover mom to let him have sexual relationship with her daughter Shannon.

[D]

So they got this guy on online, some sort of website. It was obviously like a cop pretending to Be a mom. And she was not Latina. So he said, are you a bad mom? And she said, a bad mom is in what he said. As in, like, open minded.

[C]

Let's say, can I fuck your daughter?

[D]

The next message.

[A]

It's a really bad Bob. That's what that bad Bob's is really about. That's a really bad Bob.

[C]

I'm gonna shoot my shot.

[D]

The next line they redacted. Then it said. Or any other bad way you can think of. She said, open minded. Yes. He says, cool.

[A]

Cool.

[D]

That's just some of what they showed. But basically she was. He was trying to get her to let him meet the daughter and then have a sexual relationship with her and.

[A]

How old?

[D]

Five years old.

[C]

What?

[A]

Do we have a picture of this gentleman?

[D]

Yes. There you go.

[A]

Yep, that'll do it. Okay. You know. Yep. That's tough. That's a real.

[D]

Also told her that he would be able to help. That he can help with things such as, like, helping like. No, like, haunting memories with, like, abortions. And he said he can help with other, like, dark web issues.

[A]

Oh, no. Was it Nate, let me fuck your daughter? Yeah. I don't know. That's. I don't know if there's a lot of meat on that one. I thought there was gonna be.

[B]

I mean, that's like.

[A]

Yeah, the balls that go through the parents.

[B]

Yeah. I mean, but he's also. Come on, bonus.

[A]

Become an ice cream man or a.

[C]

Teacher or something, right?

[B]

Yeah. It's just weird that, like, I feel.

[A]

Like if you go, why did the cop.

[C]

Why did they need a cop? Like, I don't.

[A]

I'd assume that they were patrolling some type of message board or website.

[C]

Right.

[A]

And see, if I was. If. If I was a pedophile, this is all. This is.

[B]

All right, we have some music, please.

[C]

I would say, right? I would say, like, do you need a babysitter or something?

[A]

If I was a pedophile, I would assume that if I was on a website with other dudes and ladies talking about being a pedophile or offering up my children for pedophilic.

[C]

Tread a little lightly. You tread carefully.

[A]

I would assume 80% of the people are cops. Are cops. And that's being very, very generous. I would assume everyone but me on that website is a police officer and they're all sitting in one room.

[C]

I'd be like, what's the purpose of this website?

[A]

They're probably all cops going, zach signed in. Everybody your stations.

[B]

Yeah, it is the Craigslist job marketplace, right?

[C]

Like, how do you even find that web, you got to start with Google, I guess, right? To even find that.

[A]

If you said dark Web. Okay, maybe it is something a little. Yeah. Harder to get to. I don't understand the Dark Web as a concept.

[C]

Understand it.

[A]

I don't understand how you get on it. Right.

[C]

There's like a button on your browser that you place.

[B]

Nah, man. All right. So I'm about to actually go back to school in a couple weeks, and I'm gonna study cybersecurity just for shits and giggles. One of the nerdiest things I've ever done. You know what I mean? But apparently with virtualization, you understand.

[A]

You look like you stop cyber shoplifters. Excuse me, ma'. Am. I'm need your column. Come here.

[B]

But no, there's always a computer within your computer. There's a way to open up a whole other thing, and then you will see an entire.

[A]

So is it not. You're not operating on your, like, iOS? You're like.

[B]

Yeah, yeah. You're basically. And I'm sure. Any listeners here, probably more. I haven't been to school yet to learn it, but I'm sure they know exactly what I'm referring to. There is like. I guess I don't know whether it's the Linux system, but there is just a whole other desktop that. That's one of the first things they're gonna teach you in cybersecurity is how to open up the virtual computer within your computer that most of us walk around with that don't even know we have it.

[A]

Yeah. Cause allegedly, when drugs were getting shipped to people that used to work here from the Dark Web, it was like a review site. Like, it was like an Amazon where people would post, I have this. These are my prices. But then people would leave reviews and be like, charging too much. This shit's bunk. This is a cop. Don't talk to them. And when it had good reviews, that's when an order would go out. And I will tell you 100 success rate and good stuff.

[B]

That's what's also wild to me. Like, it seems like the underworld is.

[A]

The most effective world, and then also, like, not.

[C]

Not like it runs smoothly.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Like he said, he.

[A]

Yeah. Because they just.

[C]

Everybody's got health insurance.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

Not to be.

[B]

There's no racism.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[C]

There's a really good sexual harassment policy that they.

[A]

Not to be a hippie dippy, but. Oh, it's almost like when drugs are legal, you can distribute them correctly and safely. Like, you know, but you said it was illegal if drugs were legal. Yeah, I'm saying, cuz the way it's like an open marketplace where people could be like, don't buy from this guy. It, you know, my friend bought it and it had fentanyl in it.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[A]

If we had that ability.

[C]

He's got one star on the dark web. Fentanyl.

[B]

Yeah. I think the legalization fucked it up. Like, I hate dispensaries. Now I so badly want to go back to buying drugs from children. Standing on the corner.

[D]

Can I jump in real quick? I found the dart video.

[A]

Oh, of course you did.

[D]

Oh, it's too late. Okay.

[B]

All right, so another light rail. This is. Okay, maybe the guy isn't white, but the guy in the muscle shirt is the guy that gets shot. And.

[C]

Oh boy.

[B]

Yeah, you see that? And the guy that shot him is the one all the way down there in the black hoodie.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Wow.

[B]

Isn't that wild?

[A]

It's a good shot.

[B]

It's amazing, right? And you don't know what prompted to look at that. He's like, holy shit, dude, there's a dart in your back. I was supposed to get on that train.

[C]

It's like they shoot you with the dart and they roast you. Like, he's wearing sandals with socks.

[B]

Dude, I missed my train trying to help out this poor bastard.

[A]

A kid charming with.

[B]

Yeah, like he tried to pull it out and he can't get it out.

[A]

Yeah, nice socks and slides, motherfuckers.

[B]

And the guy's gone. The guy. That's him walking away in the back.

[C]

I missed my train and my shoes got made fun of. Just the worst day.

[B]

Yeah, but you see what I'm saying. There's no barrier of entry to get to the platform. Anybody can hang out there. Anybody can walk up.

[C]

What do you want, like a. Like a gate or something?

[B]

You see, that's all they have paid fare past this point. But yeah, he didn't know the guy. The guy didn't touch him. The light rail is the weirdest. People hanging out there.

[A]

Yeah. Look, he's just standing there. Yeah, he's like, yo, I got this dart in my pocket. Look at.

[B]

Good shot too.

[A]

Do you think he was trying to make his friend laugh? No, he doesn't even know this girl. No, he doesn't know that person. That's crazy.

[B]

That's what I'm saying. Something weird is going on, dude. It can't. It's gotta be bigger than mental health. Oh, look at that. He didn't even know what the fuck happened?

[A]

Well, I think you would assume you got stuck with a needle. That would be my first thought if somebody hit me with an AIDS needle.

[C]

But I think the problem is, like most, the majority of homeless people won't stab you.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

So. But. So if one of them does, it's like it looks bad for the rest of the community. So that's why people are being like, all right, let's be careful here. Because they're thinking of the rest of the homeless people.

[A]

Yeah, of course.

[C]

Who are mostly fine. They'll just call you a faggot.

[A]

Yeah. And then fall back into a heroin.

[B]

Hey, guys.

[C]

Yeah, right.

[B]

I've been on Google. I was at the library today on the Internet. Our reviews are down, guys.

[C]

Well, funny enough, most homeless people are fine. I don't even know if that guy was homeless.

[B]

No, he wasn't homeless.

[A]

No, he's allowed somewhere with darts and he's got practice.

[C]

Oh, I meant the stabbing guy.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

Oh, yeah.

[A]

Hey, guys. Today's episode is brought to you by Yo Kratom. Home of the $60 kilo. That's right. If you do Kratom, there's no other place to be getting it from. If you don't use Kratom for one of its many benefits, don't start on my account, but as you use it, go to yocratum.com today because they have the best strains, the best customer service, and they're the marquee sponsor of everything we do here. There's no promo code needed. Why? The deal's already that darn good. It's the best deal in the world to kratom. 60 bucks for a whole kilo delivered right to your gosh darn door. So check them out today. Support the company that supports all your favorite shows. Yokratom.com Home of the 60 kilo. All right, let's get back into the program. Funny enough, it's a great transition. Wisconsin, man banned from every library in the world.

[B]

Really?

[A]

Okay.

[B]

You can do that?

[A]

Apparently a judge just did. It's first ever sentencing of its kind, I believe. In the world. In the world. Shannon. He was doing exactly what you think.

[C]

Yeah.

[D]

20. 20 year old Tyree S. Carter.

[C]

Sorry, Dave.

[D]

Charged with misdemeanor counts of lewd behavior and disorderly conduct. They said he was basically just doing it out in the open, not trying to conceal himself. He was released on a $1,000 signature bond under the condition to, quote, stay out of all the libraries on the face of the earth.

[C]

You know, this wasn't a first offense that's him.

[A]

Try that.

[B]

Oh, Tyree, Tyree, Tyree. No. Banned from every library in the world.

[A]

Do you know how bloud of a masturbator you have to be for the other masturbated men at the library to be like, hey, Tyree, keep it down.

[B]

Right, right, right.

[A]

Who goes to the library, right?

[C]

You gotta expect some people are gonna watch porn at the library, dude.

[B]

You guys remember Kendra Sunderland? Yeah, she's famous for her library video. She's still allowed to go.

[A]

I downloaded a porn at the library once, but I didn't watch it there. Yeah, I downloaded because I didn't have this before. I had WI fi at home in Jersey and I had a Burning angel subscription and there was a new video and I really wanted it and I couldn't. It just wouldn't download fast enough, my grandma says. So I walked to the library to download it.

[B]

Poor grandma. Just keeping the WI FI on just in case her grandchildren need it.

[A]

No, it was my aunt. I was stealing it. Yeah, the entire. Every library in the world. That's gonna be tough. They have to put pictures of them.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And that's not gonna go.

[C]

How do they enforce that?

[A]

I think it's just more, hey, stay out of this library. But I was being extra harsh with it, right?

[B]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[A]

Because what do people go to the library? Like, the only people I know that library are retarded people who want to print out.

[C]

No, no, no, I went.

[A]

No, I went.

[C]

I went last week.

[A]

Was there a reading for your kid or something?

[B]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm going today.

[C]

Yeah, yeah, no, I got my kid a library card and we can, like.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Take out books.

[A]

It's cool.

[B]

But there's.

[A]

Now we can go meet drag queens. Yeah. All right.

[B]

In my library. And my library, they have a. I'm.

[A]

All for it, by the way. I actually do think it's cool.

[B]

And my library, they have a make center where everything.

[A]

Like, it's called the bathroom. You guys have to call everything something different.

[B]

But no, the lab, They've got a 3D printer in there that you can use for free. You can print up whatever you want, learn how to use that stuff. And I just found out it's cheaper to do flyers and stuff there and posters, stuff. So, like, I'm actually going to go today to print up stuff for my Arizona show again October 18th.

[C]

Right.

[B]

Because I'm flying out to Arizona tomorrow.

[A]

It's crazy.

[C]

It's like, how do you hate communism when there's the library.

[A]

Yeah, right. It's Good.

[C]

It's free. It's for everybody.

[A]

It's a good place.

[C]

And other people pay for it.

[A]

Yeah, you get download pornography and I don't pay taxes. You beat a seven foot tall man masturbating.

[B]

Which is also weird. Of all the. There's so much. Like you can rent a. You can for free, get a laptop and take it home.

[A]

Really?

[B]

You can get like, you can get Xbox. You can get all the video games. Like most libraries have one of every.

[C]

Console and they're like, this one's not open.

[B]

So weird to do it there.

[A]

It's gotta be a thing.

[B]

Well, they're also. I know, I've noticed this now. Most libraries are near some sort of homeless shelter.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

And because homeless shelters, you're required to be out and about during the day. Like most people just hang out there in the library where they could just kind of be.

[A]

You remember my friend that used to draw pornography all the time? No. He's a special fella.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

And he used to come to all the Doug Zombie events.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

But he would. He would draw porno in public. He like anime porn.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

But he would go to the library and print out porn and have like a giant binder of it and go to bars and just put it all out on a table.

[C]

You really can print anything.

[B]

Yeah, you can.

[A]

And then he would sit there and just draw hardcore pornography. At one time we were at a bar in Coney island for like one of our stupid horror events. And he came early, so he was before everybody else. So just in the middle of like this sports bar in Coney island was a special needs black guy dressed as Michael Jackson in Thriller, drawing pornography, taking up like three tables. And you would just watch people walk by and be like, hey, guys, dress like Michael Jackson. And they go, that table's full of pornography. And everything would be misspelled. So the girl would be like, I want more comes.

[B]

Such a novelty act, man. He should be hired to make parties. Cool.

[A]

Oh, he. He's out.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Trust me, if there's an event, he's out.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, he's out.

[A]

And he. He beats the bartender there. Doesn't drink.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

But will be at the bar before you're set up, God bless him. Before the little rubber mats go out.

[B]

That's why. I wonder like why they aren't running shit. Because they're up before everybody. You know what I mean? They're up, they're organized. Like they just have that weird social thing.

[A]

My favorite for a while in wrestling, Chris Jericho did this thing where he would have champagne after his matches. And he called it a little bit of the bubbly. But this kid didn't understand what. What that was or what champagne was, so he. He thought that meant there's a treat in the refrigerator. Oh, boy. So he would just make video. I mean, this guy's really the gift that keeps. I give it. I quote him all the time, but he was just a video of him going, ah, let's see what my mom made me for lunch today. Oh. And he opens the fridge. Oh, Mac and cheese. A little bit of the bull. These are the people I quote in my life.

[B]

Absolutely. Yeah.

[A]

I had him on spook show once, years ago. And people are like, what the fuck's wrong with that guy? Is he deaf? And I would go, no. Like, oh, okay.

[B]

Some of the things that get me through, like, the weirdest moments are from crazy people. I never forget one time being in a hospital, like the ER waiting room. And, you know, if you're not bleeding or anything, they'll make you sit and wait. And then you got to see other people who come in just because it's raining and they're trying to get admitted. And I never forget this guy comes in in a wheelchair, and he wheels up to the window, and they're like, how can I help you today, sir? And he's like, my legs is all fucked up and shit, and that lives in my head for free. And I will blurt that out randomly shoot. Shannon just hit me one now, and then we just walked in. Cause Shannon sends me body cam videos also. And, yeah, she said. What did the guy say? She go, oh. The cops ask him, do you have any weapons or anything on you? And he goes, I am the weapon.

[A]

And he was.

[D]

He was the weapon.

[B]

They tased him like, three or four times, and it just had no effect on him at all. So he proceeded.

[A]

Did you see that? I'm sure you saw the video of the lady getting out of the car with the knife that they had to shoot.

[B]

No.

[A]

She's in her car. Repo came to get her car, and she drove away with it. So now the cops are involved. They tased her through her window three times, and she still got out of the car with a knife. And it's so funny because, I mean, they're tased at her. She's screaming, she's got a knife. And it's one of those things. Like the last screenshot of her.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Is this, you know, like the lady that had the boiling water, the last shot. You're like, if that was coming at me and I had a gun, I would still be shooting. I would be clicking an empty gun.

[B]

It's right up there with like the Pacers game when they ran up the stairs.

[A]

And so he fucking the cop just smokes this bitch. Yeah. And of course somebody else.

[C]

Now, not to be like a gay liberal, but you wouldn't use like non.

[A]

Lethal force that somebody immediately goes, you could have tased her. What the fuck? And like, we tased her five times. And then the one cop just goes, what the fuck did you think I was gonna do? She ran at me with a knife.

[B]

Right, right, right.

[A]

It's the most matter of fact, like, yeah, yeah, I killed her. I killed the shit out of this lady.

[B]

That's been weird too, because that one that Shannon sent me, that guy did get killed in that video, which is like. It is weird that we're watching people die. Like, they'll just stop it. Just like they did in that other video. Like, ah. And right here. But you know how this one ended, Shannon, did you.

[A]

You know the video I'm talking about? I.

[D]

Yes, I think so.

[A]

Let me find the white car. I think.

[B]

Yeah, that's also weird too.

[C]

Let's see the video.

[B]

Yeah, let me.

[A]

Let's see the video before we choose.

[B]

It's the morning zoo. Come on, guys. But, like, there's a. It's weird to watch these people end it all over such small circumstances.

[C]

Because, like, your car getting repossessed is kind of like, that's a big deal.

[A]

It's a real day ruiner, isn't it?

[C]

Like, yeah, yeah. Then you're like, I can't get to work. Your life's kind of over. I gotta ride a bike to. I gotta ride a bike to Wendy's.

[A]

Now I gotta start going to the library.

[B]

I know. Yeah. Could you imagine the voicemail from her boss that day? All right, listen, this is your sixth time being late this week. We're just going to cut ties, you know, and then you find this video later on.

[A]

Oh, shit. I feel bad.

[B]

I fired her.

[A]

Shannon, did you find it? Yeah, there we go.

[B]

Ooh, Ford Fusion.

[C]

Oh, and we got a lady cop.

[D]

Here, so should be sound.

[B]

What? Why is the camera already pointed? Oh, so she was tased already?

[D]

I can go back a little further if you want. Just pretty long.

[B]

Oh, she came out with the knife. Okay, so we're seeing it from.

[A]

Yeah, they're tasing her in the car.

[B]

Yeah, because the guy already had, like, it pointed. Pointed in. I love how they had to pull around Someone's alley to get there. Which you know what you're doing. Cuz I don't know if you guys have ever been extracted from the. The car at gunpoint. It's just like, hey, I'm cooperating. I'm cooperating at this point. Now they're tasing her. All right, that cop's kind of holding that thing, but they're tasing her.

[A]

But I don't give a cop.

[B]

Oh, oh, come on. Why she got sound like Tom and Jerry.

[A]

Tom, I told you.

[B]

He was hitting her with the taser though. Look at her trying to explain herself. Shut up, Frost.

[A]

Choo choo chase.

[C]

We did taser.

[B]

But.

[A]

But there's like four cops here.

[C]

You can't subdue a lady with a knife.

[B]

They don't want to.

[A]

Right? There was a guy in England who.

[C]

Like he cut like three people's heads off and they were still able to do it.

[A]

But I have guns.

[B]

The cops don't have guns.

[A]

Yeah, I understand your point. But a. I wish. I bet they wish they had guns that day. The. If I run at a cop with a knife, there's something that's suicide by cop.

[C]

Sure.

[A]

Which probably.

[C]

Which probably does feel pretty good.

[A]

It's gotta be awesome.

[B]

Absolutely. Cause let me tell you something. Those cops aren't well after that.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

The amount of one. The amount of paperwork, the amount of therapy, all kinds of shit that they have to go through before they can even get back on the street.

[A]

Kids probably pest at em. The fucking liberal faggots sucked. Oh, what's for dinner? Murderer.

[C]

Oh, their kids.

[B]

Oh, yeah, absolutely. Shoot, you think? What's the dude Chauvin. The guy that killed George Floyd. You think his family's happy with him now?

[A]

Oh, you're sitting at dinner because of you, dad. You're sitting at dinner and your son gently picks up the knife. I'm gonna hand this to you slowly because I don't want you overreacting again.

[B]

Dad, it's only pepper. And you asked for it.

[A]

Yeah, if you. I think Gunner and knives, if you come at a cop like that.

[B]

Like I said, I've been extracted from the vehicle before.

[A]

I got pulled out of the window.

[B]

When I was thinning up to the gun is an immediate equalizer. I am blown away at the amount of body cam videos they wish, but I'm blown away at the amount of people that I see when the cops pull a gun. They go, oh, oh, oh, oh. You gonna shoot me now? You wanna shoot? It's like, wow, there's no fear in Some people at all. So it's like it's not even an equalizer anymore that you pull a gun out, they're gonna make you use it. Now at this point. You know what I mean? And that's white or black, man.

[A]

I agree with you, Dave. That's a very good point.

[B]

Yeah, man.

[A]

Very scary. All right, let's look at one last thing before we get out of here. This is so.

[C]

But what happened though? They tased her.

[A]

They tased a knife and was running full speed.

[C]

Sure.

[A]

At a lady with a butcher knife.

[C]

But then what's wrong with the. Why. Why the taser malfunctioned or something.

[B]

We don't know. You didn't see him. He was squeezing it. He was. He kept sending the charge in.

[D]

They broke the other.

[A]

They. I'm pretty sure when you electrocute black people, they turn into superheroes.

[C]

Right.

[A]

They have a lot of electricity based powers.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

All right.

[C]

I'm glad she's dead.

[A]

So this is not a toy tonight. But this is. We're just gonna. We're gonna. This is a couple that I thought was inspiring. And you don't see this every day. And let's take a look. Shannon. This is our first story. The woman. Woman in love. I'm Taffy. This is my partner.

[D]

Start haters. Want to know why she wants to be with me. People confuse me with being a child all the time.

[A]

My height is 3 7. I love Taffy, despite her height.

[C]

Taffy, that comment. It's my fault for having the Internet.

[A]

Or you the kid or you watch you dating a kid or while would you want to date someone that looks like a kid? I don't care. She don't care. I love her. Bros throwing up gang signs 24 7. I feel the most common about our relationship that people talk about is I kind of get your disability checks. It's a height difference. So I'm way too thick to be with you. Definitely that we're an odd couple.

[D]

It irritates me when the truth is.

[A]

I'm a child because you see that I have piercing. You see that I have tattoos. Like, are you blind or you not looking? What is it? Common sense, people. Common sense. Pause rap. Name's Little Red Lobster.

[B]

That is her song playing in the background. By the way, that beat was not an accident.

[A]

How's it. Hi, I'm Taffy. This also Taffy is. Okay.

[B]

First of all, it's a great name.

[A]

Taffy's hilarious.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[A]

Cause she looks chewed up.

[C]

She goes to Red Lobster. They put her Back in the tank.

[A]

I'm escaped. I can't swim, no. Cause I'm deformed. Not the black thing. Right.

[B]

She's got rubber bands on her claws. I also love the fact that, like, she's a stud, which. You guys know what studs are, right? But that's so even at that level, choosing to be that type of stud. Cause studs never choose to be upstanding men.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

They choose to be the worst kind of guy.

[A]

There's never a stud with a pocket square.

[B]

No. Never. I think Ellen was the only one.

[A]

Yeah. No, that's one of my favorite genres of video right now.

[B]

Studs.

[A]

Yeah. They'll go. What's your stud name? Oh, yeah. What's your real name? Yeah, yeah, yeah. What's your stud name? Lavon.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

What's your real name? Jessica. All right. I think we have put in some time today, Shannon. Getting it right out on time, baby girl. Thank you so much for tuning in. Please support Dave Temple and Mike Racine. Watch. No need for apologies. Watch Racine time. See these guys out on the road. And thank you so much for your time. We'll see you this Wednesday here on the Morning Zoo. Goodbye. Noon is morning time to him pop Baco, chug it down. Just like the favorite OB Join the crew. It's Acamiko morning, too. It's Acamiko morning, too.