0116. JP McDade, Molly Vivent and Heather Mae

Summary

Zac Amico's Morning Zoo Ep. 0116

Guests: JP McDade, Molly Viman, Heather May
Date: May 31, 2026
Podcast Theme: Irreverent comedy roundtable dissecting weird news, wild stories, chaotic personal anecdotes, and boundary-pushing bits with a rotating cast of comedians and misfits.

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Episode Overview

This episode of Zac Amico's Morning Zoo is characteristically chaotic, honest, and blunt, with Zac and crew riffing on bizarre news, sharing gleefully unfiltered personal stories, and trading quick-fire hot takes. Topics range from RFK Jr.'s snake-wrangling, to Marlon Wayans' support for Dave Chappelle, serial killers, wrestling-room justice, and animal anatomy oddities—all with the panel's signature gallows humor.

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Comedian Introductions & Plugs

Timestamps: 01:55–04:00

• Zac proudly introduces returning guest JP McDade and regular Molly Vivan. First-time guest Heather May is welcomed warmly.
• The group jokes about “tits swollen” (02:43, Molly and Heather), setting the episode’s tone: raunchy and candid.
• Plugs:
  • JP plugs his special “In Brooklyn” on YouTube (03:03)
  • Molly: “Instagram. How did I get so sexy? That’s it.” (03:14)
  • Heather is going on tour with Zac and Crack Amico (“Amico Bros World Tour”) in Indiana/Michigan (03:20).
• Zac recounts bombing a post-special Brooklyn show:
  • “Oh boy, did they not care for your boy.” (04:49)
  • Confronted afterward by stern audience members who dissected his set: “They diagram the whole set: ‘this is where you went wrong.’” (05:31, JP)

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Key Discussion Points & Memorable Moments

RFK Jr. Snakes Story

Timestamps: 06:51–09:51

• The panel riffs on viral footage of RFK Jr. removing snakes from Dr. Oz’s patio.
• “I gotta tell you, don’t agree with the man on many things, but every once in a while, he catches me and I go, this son of a bitch.” – Zac (07:13)
• They joke about Kennedys lacking survival skills and riff on snake-catching technique, comparing RFK to “the little boy in the overalls catching toads.” (07:16, JP)
• Memorable Bit: “I feel like RFK is trying to prove that snake bites cure autism.” – Zac (09:42)

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Marlon Wayans, Dave Chappelle, and Transgender Issues

Timestamps: 09:49–15:49

• Discussion of Marlon Wayans’ support for both Dave Chappelle and his trans son.
• Conversation about public perceptions of trans individuals, with darkly comic observations about hormones and societal attitudes.
• Notable critique on the differences between trans men and trans women:
  • “I will always acknowledge a trans woman as a woman…but like, at the end of the day, they were a man, so they have something in them that is inherently a little bad. So…they’re a little fucking crazy.” – Molly (12:06)
• Riffs about the inevitability of a Wayans family sitcom, “the Wayans Sisters”/“even more Wayans brothers”, and Chappelle transitioning (“Dove Chappelle Circle”).
• Marlon Wayans’ quote (read by producer Shannon, 13:45):
  • “I wouldn’t hang with Dave if he was full of hate…I know Dave’s heart…his intention isn’t to punch down…he just wants to freely tell his jokes…”
• Panel’s reaction: Supporting both your friend and your trans child is “just being a good dad and good friend.” (14:45, Zac)

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On Smoking: Cigs vs. Vapes

Timestamps: 15:00–17:00

• The panel nostalgically lampoons the decline of cigarette culture in favor of vaping.
• “Let’s get some real diseases back in the mix.” – JP (15:15)
• Zac shares a story about buying Newports to fit in at an all-Black comedy night.
  • “I made a lot of…got business cards for eight different barber shops.” (16:27)
  • “The DJ literally turned the music off when I walked in. He did the ‘Man, what the fuck?’” (16:41)
• Extended riffing on bar culture, cigarettes as social currency, and odd club demographics.

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Serial Killers in the News

Timestamps: 23:46–32:00

• Panel reacts to sensational headlines about possible serial killings in Mexico; speculation about body counts, tactics, and criminal history.
• Brief true-crime deep-dive: Henry Lee Lucas, Luis Garavito (Colombia), and the “prolific” Philly pedophile Eddie Savitz.
  • Quotes/statistics: “He confessed to torturing and murdering at least 193, but potentially over 300 children…” — Shannon (24:46)
  • “Eddie Savitz…180 trash bags full of used boys’ underwear and socks” – Zac (28:22)
• The panel teases Friday’s upcoming deep-dive on Uncle Eddie Savitz.

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Infamous Crimes: West Memphis Three & The Staircase

Timestamps: 29:42–36:50

• Recap and debate about the West Memphis Three case and “Paradise Lost” documentaries:
  • “The parents are all…insane…praying that the teenagers get raped in prison…and it’s all being documentary [sic].” – Molly (32:32)
• “The Staircase” docuseries and the infamous “owl theory” dissected:
  • “At about the halfway point, they go, oh, he was married before, but she died…at the bottom of a staircase.” – Zac (35:42)
• Toni Collette’s “realistic ass eating scene” in the HBO dramatization (34:43)

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Kindergarten Graduation Brawl

Timestamps: 38:03–43:11

• Viral brawl at an Ohio kindergarten graduation over saved seats:
  • “She wore her nicest heart pajamas.” – Zac (38:41)
  • Slow-motion analysis of the fight: “If they didn't want them brawling, they shouldn’t have put out folding chairs.” – JP (40:37)
• Heather May shares experiences as a former early childhood teacher, confronting drunk/irresponsible parents (41:12–41:41).
• Panel reminisces about “old school” justice—wrestling-room fights, parents stepping in, and avoiding lawsuits (44:01–45:08).

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Impounded Cars and Police Auctions

Timestamps: 45:18–48:35

• Molly tells the saga of her car being towed by NYPD and “sold” without notice. She considers but shrugs at the idea of suing—“I think I just don’t care…I learned a lesson and I’ll move on.” (47:41)
• Zac imagines attending police auctions: “I want a car with bullet holes in it…I want something with a horrible crime.” (48:27)
• Discussion shifts to friends who collect infamous crime memorabilia.

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Odd Collections & Music Legends

Timestamps: 48:58–53:50

• Discussion of friends who buy serial killer artifacts—numbers from Dahmer’s door, Ed Gein’s pulleys, etc.
• Lemmy from Motorhead’s wall of SS knives: “Optically not great, but I think he just liked knives.” – Zac (49:38)
  • Discussion on WWII memories, trophies of war, and Lemmy’s legendary broke/degenerate status: “He lived by a bar…would just go sit and play video poker.” (51:08)
  • Lemmy’s teeth incident at a strip club (“spit his dentures in a stripper’s face”), British thugs, and Troma tribute video—quintessential chaos. (53:25)

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Animal Anomalies: Two-Penised Dog & More

Timestamps: 55:42–61:48

• News story: Dog with two penises undergoes surgery; leg is fixed too.
  • Panel riffs on anatomical freaks, dog genitals, and heat cycles.
  • “My dog had a fat pussy when she went into heat…” – Molly (56:50)
• Extended dog breeding conversation:
  • “Dogs do not understand or care about breed standards…they only recognize scent and behavioral cues…” (59:57, reading research)
  • Size mismatches, dog abortions, and canine reproductive hell.

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Horrible Accidents: Woman Run Over by Own Car

Timestamps: 62:17–63:34

• Viral video: Woman run over by her own car after checking battery, miraculously unharmed.
• Panel jokes about the Anton Yelchin tragedy, feeling “like a real silly goose” for self-inflicted accidents.
• Reference to “Indians vs. Trains” segment—watching viral clips from countries with lax safety standards, ending with horrific soup accident video:
  • “His balls are literally melting.” – Molly (66:14)
  • “We have terrible news about Stu…” – JP (66:26)

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Notable Quotes (with Timestamps)

• “I want to hate him, but he came here once, and he was the charming—he was so charming. He had...Whatever that Kennedy thing is, dude, that’s real.” – Zac, on RFK Jr. (09:49)
• “Let’s get some real diseases back in the mix.” – JP (15:15)
• “I think you’re safe around you, Zac.” – Molly (19:43)
• “If you use Kratom…there’s only one place in the world…and there’s no promo code needed. Why? It’s already the best deal in the world.” – Zac (49:49, sponsor read, contextually skipped)
• “Technically, any sex with me is group sex.” – Zac (22:14)
• “Dogs do not recognize breed distinctions, their mating choices are driven by instinct rather than pedigree.” – Molly reading, with group riffing (60:12)
• “You gotta feel like a real silly goose…to run yourself over.” – Zac, after watching the car incident (62:46)
• “His balls are literally melting.” – Molly, on the soup accident video (66:14)
• “We have terrible news about Stu…” – JP, darkly underscoring tragic comedic timing (66:26)

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Episode Flow & Tone

The episode is fast-paced, irreverent, and gleefully crude, moving fluidly from news stories to personal confessions and back again. Zac keeps the vibe playful but unhinged, with guests rapidly “punching up” each bit. The crew balances gnarly true-crime talk with slapstick animal stories and street-level confessions, always choosing comedy over sensitivity or polish.

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Key Segment Timestamps

• Plugs & Intros: 01:55–04:00
• RFK Jr. Snake Story: 06:51–09:51
• Marlon Wayans/Chappelle/Trans: 09:49–15:49
• Cigarettes vs. Vapes/Social Currency: 15:00–17:00
• Serial Killers, True Crime: 23:46–32:00
• West Memphis Three/The Staircase: 29:42–36:50
• Kindergarten Brawl: 38:03–43:11
• Police Auctions & Crime Artifacts: 45:18–53:50
• Dog with Two Penises: 55:42–61:48
• Self-Run-Over Woman & Boiling Soup: 62:17–66:52

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For New Listeners

If you haven't heard Zac Amico's Morning Zoo before, this episode is a quintessential taste: unfiltered, weirdly warm, and ruthlessly funny. The crew is quick with both hot takes and self-deprecation, digging into society’s underbelly, pop culture, and their own checkered pasts without a filter—but always with a wink.

Listener warning: Nothing is off-limits; expect crassness and dark humor at every turn.

Transcript

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[JP McDade]

Fill ER up.

[Zach Amico]

You're listening to the Gas Digital Network.

[Show Intro Voice]

Wake up, it's time to go. Zakamiko's gotta show. Animals are here to play jokes and guests to start your day. Tell the sandman no more sleep Eat some eggs and cook some beef Laughter's waiting, don't be shy Stretch your legs and touch the sky Grab a coffee and join the crew. It's Zach Amico.

[Zach Amico]

Morning, Sou. Welcome. Well, good morning. It is a fine and dandy Wednesday here at the Gas Digital Studios in New York City. It's me, your other boy, the international superstar Zach Amico. And I am pleased as punch to be joined by a group of very funny, talented people. Next to me, one of the funniest guys in the world and very proud to call him a friend, JP McDade. How you doing, man?

[JP McDade]

You freaking guys. Oh, my God. I'm good, man. Thanks for having me.

[Zach Amico]

Great to see you. Thank you very much for your time. Across the table from me, joining us again, stalwart of the show, one of my favorite. Another one of my favorite people, Molly. Vivian, how are you?

[Molly Viman]

Amazing. Tits swollen.

[Zach Amico]

Thank you. That's exactly what I was thinking. And next to her joining us for the first time, it is our new friend, Heather May.

[Heather May]

How are you Doing well, also tits swollen.

[Zach Amico]

Excellent. Thank you so much for being here. Let's knock plugs out of the way. Jp what do you want people to check out, dog?

[JP McDade]

Just find me on the Internet. McDade, baby. On Instagram. JPMCD Comedy on YouTube. Got a special called In Brooklyn on YouTube. Go check it out.

[Zach Amico]

Very good, Molly.

[Molly Viman]

Instagram. How did I get so sexy? Yeah, that's it.

[Zach Amico]

Wonderful. Heather, I believe you've got some stuff to plug.

[Heather May]

I do. Actually I'm going on tour with you. So June 4th, 5th, 6th and 7th, we'll be in northern Indiana and all over Michigan.

[Zach Amico]

Yep, that's the amazing Amico Bros. World Tour. Heather and I will be doing a stand up show and then my brother Crack Amico will be doing a full concert. Why? Because I'm not following music. So come on out to that. You can find me on Instagram at zackisnotfunny. Punchup Live. Zachamico to get all those tickets. And hey, if you enjoy this program, go to gasdigital.com and use my promo code ZOO Z O O. You get your episodes early ad free and uncensored. You get access to the archives thousands of episodes of all your favorite GAS shows from the last decade. The live chat, as well as our Friday bonus episode. So thank you so much for tuning in. Boy, did I take a hot one last night. Real, real. It was really nice after taping my special over the weekend. Real nice to be humbled in the bowels of hipster Brooklyn.

[JP McDade]

Return to Earth.

[Zach Amico]

Oh boy. I knew it was coming. I knew I was owed one for how good my tapings went. And oh boy did I get. And I just did my stuff I do worked. And oh boy, did they not care for your boy. Shout out to Napoleon, Emmel and Zion DG for booking me at Alphaville.

[JP McDade]

Oh, I did that show. That's a good show.

[Zach Amico]

It's a very good show. It is a very good show. They just did. Did not like the shit I was providing.

[JP McDade]

It's the post special glow.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah.

[JP McDade]

The wad is shot.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah. It was not just a lot of. A lot of stern women who were very upset and then wanted to have a talk with me after the show about my material and explain to me why I shouldn't do jokes about what I do jokes about.

[JP McDade]

Into the office.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah, I got called to the office and I wouldn't give it to him. She's like, you were doing good until that those last few jokes you did and you understand why you shouldn't do those. They just murdered at my special.

[JP McDade]

Love that when they diagram the whole set like, this is where you went wrong. I would have done this. You were sitting down during the show.

[Zach Amico]

Yes. And oh boy, did they. By the time I got into My impression of a retarded woman. They did not care for your boy, but very fun night regardless, and it's a great show.

[JP McDade]

So I liked it if you. And if you and Crack went on tour as brothers just to have, like, your parents there. But they're like, two completely normal people in, like, khakis and button downs.

[Zach Amico]

Like, we should hire actors to be our parents.

[JP McDade]

So proud of our boys.

[Zach Amico]

That would be so great. And we. But we got to do a family. Like a. We got to go to, like, a Walmart.

[JP McDade]

Yes. Get a job.

[Zach Amico]

Family photo.

[Heather May]

We can arrange this.

[Zach Amico]

Oh, yeah.

[Heather May]

You have a tour manager and myself that play very good parents.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah, that'll be great.

[JP McDade]

Guys on the beach. Like, hanging each other as the.

[Heather May]

We're going to be right at the beach.

[Zach Amico]

That's perfect. I think we've.

[JP McDade]

I think in Indiana.

[Zach Amico]

I think we've got a plan. I. But I want to be, like, dressed like a child.

[JP McDade]

Yes. Overalls.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Sailor suit.

[JP McDade]

Sorry, sir. There's nothing that goes over all that.

[Zach Amico]

Overalls are one of my dependent. The one. The one thing I know I can still get into. They do make them for. They do make them for men of a certain girth.

[JP McDade]

It's technically not a onesie. It's like a 1.8 Z.

[Zach Amico]

It's a threesie. All right, so we had a couple silly stories to look at today. Let's start fun. RFK Jr. Snatches two snakes off Dr. Oz's patio. I gotta tell you, don't agree with the man on many things, but every once in a while he catches me and I go, this son of a bitch.

[JP McDade]

He's the little boy in the overalls catching toads.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah, he's just out there having a good time, having abs, working out in jeans with Kid Rock. What do you want out of life?

[JP McDade]

Fuck.

[Zach Amico]

It's a garter steak.

[JP McDade]

It's not venomous.

[Zach Amico]

He's probably trying desperately to get attention off what Mulaney said about him.

[JP McDade]

Oh, did he pop off on him again? I didn't. I didn't see that.

[Zach Amico]

He did a bit in his Netflix as a joke set where he's describing RFK and Cheryl Hines. He's married to the very nice woman from Curb Enthusiasm, and he cheats on her like a dog. And everyone knows a Kennedy cheating. Can you imagine? All right, so let's check out the video. Shannon, However you're supposed to catch snakes, that's not it.

[JP McDade]

Just reading the body language of the snakes, it seems like they wanted to be left alone.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah, I don't think you're supposed to hold them by the tail.

[Heather May]

Supposed to catch them by the head so they can't get around to these

[Zach Amico]

Kennedies have no life skills. They have no survival instincts.

[JP McDade]

Well, I'm going to go get in a single prop plane.

[Molly Viman]

They just look like black racers, though. Like nothing.

[Zach Amico]

That's what they are.

[Molly Viman]

Yeah, I used to do that when I was, like, seven.

[Zach Amico]

I'm not a little closer to the mic coming.

[Molly Viman]

Okay, Sorry.

[JP McDade]

Is he trying to act cool about getting bit by a snake? Trying to shrug it off.

[Heather May]

I mean, it is pretty badass. Yeah, I did try that, and I think part of it right there.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah. How bad is it? But what kind of snake?

[Heather May]

Oh, God. Brown in a lake?

[Molly Viman]

Ish.

[Heather May]

I don't know. Okay. I don't know.

[Zach Amico]

Probably a garter snake.

[Heather May]

Probably.

[Zach Amico]

Okay.

[Heather May]

And I was in, like, waders, the whole thing. We were there teaching kids, like, nature, and. And I thought I was going to be real cool and catch the snake the correct way, and I didn't quite make it, and it got me right there.

[Zach Amico]

Damn.

[JP McDade]

So you go for the head.

[Heather May]

Yeah, Right behind. Yeah. I still bragged about it the whole time. It thought I was very cool.

[JP McDade]

So just discreetly injecting anti venom.

[Heather May]

Yeah.

[JP McDade]

Like nothing's wrong.

[Heather May]

No, that I was quickly told, not poisonous. Not.

[JP McDade]

That's good. So it wasn't like a water.

[Heather May]

Could have been an RFK thing, but

[Zach Amico]

I feel like RFK is trying to prove that snake bites cure autism.

[Heather May]

I was literally gonna say the same thing.

[Zach Amico]

We need to harvest the anti venom.

[Heather May]

Tylenol causes it snake.

[Zach Amico]

We need to harvest the antivenom. I don't know, man. I want to hate him, but he came here once, and he was the charming. He was so charming. He had. Whatever that Kennedy thing is, dude, that's real. He looks you in the eye and shakes your hand, and you're like, I trust you, and he's a lunatic. I knew he was a lunatic when I shook his hand, and I went, I like them. All right, moving on. This is very interesting to me. Marlon Wayne's defense relationship with Dave Chappelle despite having transgender child Shannon. Which way is which. Which trans. Which transition direction is Marlon Wayne's child AC or dc? Yes.

[Shannon (Producer/Researcher)]

Let me double check. I believe it's boy to girl. Let me just double check.

[Zach Amico]

Okay. I feel like for a black guy, having your daughter become a man is almost like a double win, because then

[JP McDade]

you got a stud just watching hoops.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. You get to ball out and they're so sexy, Studs.

[JP McDade]

Yeah, just slap boxing with your. With your daughter turned son.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah, let's just punch her right in the tits. You're gonna have to get rid of those if you want to fight, girl.

[JP McDade]

Marlon knows something. He knows. He probably knows that Dave on his next special is going to come out as trans.

[Zach Amico]

Yes.

[JP McDade]

It's going to be Dove Chappelle Circle.

[Zach Amico]

It's very possible.

[JP McDade]

That's why she has been talking about it on the last four or five specials.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah, she's been dealing with it in her own way.

[JP McDade]

Dysphoria.

[Shannon (Producer/Researcher)]

I guessed in completely the wrong direction. I was only two choices, but it was.

[Zach Amico]

Oh, he got him something.

[JP McDade]

Look.

[Zach Amico]

Look how proud he is of his studio.

[Molly Viman]

Yeah, he just looks cool.

[JP McDade]

Kind of turned into Jalen Brunson a little bit.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah. Yeah. So that's a. I hate to be presumptuous and I hope this isn't a stereotype. I feel like for a black guy of that age, that's a much easier sell than the other way around.

[Molly Viman]

Even for me, it's a much easier sell.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah.

[Molly Viman]

Like, I think female to male trans people are way more chill. Like by far out of every.

[Zach Amico]

I feel like judging based on Internet angriness. Yeah.

[Molly Viman]

But even just in my personal life, I feel like the other way around. It's just. I will always acknowledge a trans woman as a woman because I will call them a woman. But like, at the end of the day, they were a man, so they have something in them that is inherently a little bad. So. So it's a little bit. They're a little fucking crazy.

[Zach Amico]

I was gonna say. I was gonna say maybe they're literally getting injected with crazy and that could also be part of it.

[JP McDade]

Look it up.

[Zach Amico]

We need the anti venom.

[Molly Viman]

The other way around also takes stuff.

[Zach Amico]

Yes, it does.

[Molly Viman]

Testosterone.

[Zach Amico]

Yes. Of course. I'm not saying one's good and one's.

[JP McDade]

Everybody's getting stuff cut off. Everyone's getting stuff reattached. The bottom line is we know that we're getting a multi cam sitcom on the WB about this, of course, involving the Wayans family. It's already greenlit.

[Molly Viman]

I really hope so.

[JP McDade]

22 episodes.

[Zach Amico]

Oh, dude, that would be great if it said the Waynes sisters. And then it crosses out even more brothers. Even more Wayne's brother.

[Molly Viman]

That's what we do.

[JP McDade]

Keep finding ways to make more Wayans brothers.

[Zach Amico]

There's nothing I do whiteface. There's nothing funnier.

[JP McDade]

Please.

[Zach Amico]

Have you ever seen the compilation videos where they'll ask Studs what's your stud name and then what's your birth name? And you watch them drop the bit for a second and it's. They're so in on it and it's so fucking funny. Shannon, if you could look that up after we do this story. But tell us about it.

[Molly Viman]

It's like.

[Shannon (Producer/Researcher)]

So he basically said, I can read the quote. He said, I wouldn't hang with Dave if he was full of hate. I don't hang with people like that. I know Dave's heart. And his intention isn't to punch down. Dave wants to freely tell his jokes. And if you're going to be anti comedy, then he's going to keep attacking you until you learn to have a sense of humor. He's just standing there and defending his front line as a comedian. He also goes on to say that he had a role for him in the next case Scary Movie. He supports like his journey as a four hour monologue. He supports his. His role as a comedian and also supports his child's journey as a trans person. So it's all love.

[Zach Amico]

Well, there you go. I think there's. Do you think when they cut her tits off, they did the requiem for a dream pan out? I forget that he said that. I get it, man. Support. You can. You can support both.

[Molly Viman]

Yeah.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah. I don't think this is a barely news. Right. Is it good? That man is good dad and good friend.

[Heather May]

Yeah.

[JP McDade]

As long as the Wayne's kid smokes.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah.

[JP McDade]

Fine with Dave Chappelle.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah.

[JP McDade]

To or from.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah. As. As long as they're. I think we got to take it easy on. Let's smoke and be cool again. I feel like it's coming back. Get rid of all these vapes. Get rid of the vapes.

[Molly Viman]

I know.

[Zach Amico]

Go back to segs, dude. Fuck it. If you're gonna do it, do it.

[JP McDade]

Don't have fashion emphysema no more. No more of this popcorn lung. Let's get some real diseases back in the mix.

[Zach Amico]

I don't. If I'm gonna get cancer, I don't want to get it from cotton candy air.

[JP McDade]

That's right.

[Zach Amico]

I'll get it from Sigs. Like a goddamn person. I want to go outside and go, can I borrow a cig as a way to leave a bar as I'm stuck talking to an open micr who's cornered me.

[Heather May]

Yes. Because doing this for somebody's vape is kind of gay.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah. I don't think you could borrow another man's vape. Maybe a weed pen is different.

[Heather May]

Yes.

[JP McDade]

No. No, my lady. A beautiful woman doesn't squeeze her own vape.

[Zach Amico]

There's gotta be dudes that hang out outside of bars with vapes just to do that.

[JP McDade]

Respect.

[Zach Amico]

I used to keep a light. I've always kept a lighter on me even though I don't smoke.

[JP McDade]

Something Boomhauer would do.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah, 100%. I always kept the lighter on me just cause it's a way to interact with people. One time, Yamanika took me to an all Black knight and I was afraid of not making friends. So I went across the street and bought a pack of Newports and threw one in the street and put it in my front pocket.

[JP McDade]

Just being like, I've gotta have some of their currency with me if I go into their realm, buddy.

[Sponsor/Ad Voice]

Did it work?

[Zach Amico]

It worked. Yeah. I made a lot of. I got business cards for like eight different barbershops. It was a fun. It went well. That was a fun night.

[JP McDade]

You had the cleanest edge up of your life.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. The DJ literally turned the music off when I walked in. He did the. He went, man, what the fuck? Yeah. But he goes, you want to go to a big girl party with me? And I was like, yeah. Then we got in the cab and it just kept going. I was like, where? I know. I was like, are we crossing state?

[JP McDade]

Did you go past 180?

[Zach Amico]

I didn't know how far the streets went. And dude, it was fucking. Me and Yamanika were the runts of the litter. The women. There were some of the women there. I couldn't tell if they were furniture. And there was just dudes orbiting them. Every dude there looked like ceelo.

[JP McDade]

It's a whole solar system.

[Zach Amico]

Oh, dude. It was what. I've never seen a club with so much seating. They had to have borrowed couches from every other business on the block because none of them matched. And they listen.

[JP McDade]

When the barbershop closes and the club opens, they move the couch.

[Zach Amico]

Yes.

[JP McDade]

Yeah. Have more seating.

[Zach Amico]

It was. None of the couches match. And I think they went, listen, these girls have about three minutes a piece on their feet. Let's, let's, let's. Let's keep them comfy.

[Molly Viman]

They're all SS. BBWs.

[Zach Amico]

Yes. They. There were some biggins.

[JP McDade]

I went to Yamanika's place one time because I was. I was working with her on like a roast thing and we were writing jokes and like, we went outside because she was smoking a cig. Still a cool person left. And we were up in Harlem and someone was walking by and they were like, Mad that she was talking to me. And they were like, I'm paraphrasing here. But he was like, hey, they don't like fellas. And I was like. I didn't know what to say. I didn't say anything. She said something back, put it in my head. I was like, hey, I like fellas just fine.

[Zach Amico]

I, for a while dated a goth black chick with like purple dreadlocks and stuff and the bunch of piercings. And every time we walk through Union Square, a black guy would just try and take her. Like, just try and grab, like, I. Like, I did it. Like he was going to grab her and she was going to turn back. We both figure out whatever.

[Heather May]

This shit only goes one way.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah. He's like, honey, where you go? He's like, I can save you. Like, he just looked miserable for me.

[JP McDade]

Once you go, Zach, you never go back.

[Zach Amico]

That's true.

[Heather May]

There we go.

[Zach Amico]

Well, no, now she's gone. She is now in the same realm as Marlon Wayne's daughter.

[JP McDade]

I see.

[Zach Amico]

I see I've turned two. Thank you.

[Heather May]

That's impressive.

[Zach Amico]

Thank you. I'm starting to think it's me. My drummer from my old band.

[JP McDade]

You're a portal to another dimension.

[Zach Amico]

My drummer from my old band and my keyboard player transitioned into women. And my two of the girls I dated in college transitioned into men. I'm starting to think it's me.

[Heather May]

You're just creating safe spaces.

[Zach Amico]

I think maybe I'm just very progressive.

[JP McDade]

I like the symmetry.

[Molly Viman]

I think you're safe around you, Zach.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah. And then all the times me and my friend double teamed. Girls. Now that's a great story about me and two beautiful women.

[Heather May]

Yeah.

[Zach Amico]

Cause I'm progressive and I'm not gonna dead name them. That was me and two beautiful women. One just had a giant cock that the other girl liked way more than mine.

[Heather May]

Which women can have giant cocks anytime?

[Zach Amico]

Yeah, absolutely. That was a humiliating three way.

[JP McDade]

Every time she got double teamed, it was just you.

[Zach Amico]

Every time I was on vagina about 30 seconds. And she's like, you guys want to switch back? But then my friend could not maintain rigidity.

[JP McDade]

Rigidity.

[Zach Amico]

And so unfortunately, the yin and the yang, unfortunately, she got the backup.

[JP McDade]

You got promoted for.

[Molly Viman]

You were the understudy.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. She was. She was not thrilled. And then she asked both of us if we would sleep over, and we both said no. And then we found out that her sister was having a party, and they stopped the party to listen. And an entire high school class because we were all in college. An entire high school class listen to this girl's sister get double teamed by two fucking weirdo goth guys. Which I can only imagine made its way around school pretty quick.

[Molly Viman]

Yeah. And they all talked about how she was disappointed.

[Zach Amico]

Oh, I'm sure. Yeah. Yeah. Another time, that same person that we both took girls back to an apartment and I finished way too fast and the girl angrily smoked and stared at me while we just heard the other girl getting her back blown out. And I could see the like, ah, I should have just fucked him with her. What did I do?

[JP McDade]

It's like when a basketball player gets into foul trouble early.

[Heather May]

Yeah.

[JP McDade]

He's got to go to the bench.

[Zach Amico]

Oh, she was.

[Molly Viman]

But it's honestly never too late. Like she could have.

[Heather May]

Problem solved.

[Zach Amico]

Oh, we. We wound up. We wound up consolidating.

[Molly Viman]

Yeah.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah. We wound up turning it into just the four of us.

[Molly Viman]

Yeah.

[Zach Amico]

You know, that's the fun part of being a goth in your. In your early 20s. There are no rules. You know, JP.

[JP McDade]

Oh, for sure.

[Zach Amico]

You know. You know, you know about group sex with all your goth friends?

[JP McDade]

Sure.

[Zach Amico]

It happens.

[JP McDade]

It was in high school for me. It was a group of one. Let me tell you, less than group sex.

[Zach Amico]

Technically, any sex with me is group sex.

[JP McDade]

There wasn't even a pair.

[Zach Amico]

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[Shannon (Producer/Researcher)]

Okay, so it's a. The title is a little bit clickbaity because they were. No, it's not your fault, though. They did it. But. So people are concerned because they're so close together, but they're currently saying that there isn't a tie between, like, how the three were killed. But they. They were all in their mid-30s and had tattoos and were discovered within the space of 11 days.

[Zach Amico]

And all stripped.

[Shannon (Producer/Researcher)]

No. So one. The most recent one was found, and it said she was missing a shoe, but she was wearing, like, stretchy shorts and a black shirt. Yeah.

[Zach Amico]

So this just sounds like Consequences of Mexico.

[Molly Viman]

Yeah, or they aren't.

[JP McDade]

Like Frog himself is a serial killer. Goes all the way to the top.

[Heather May]

I suspected that Frog a long time. All that free tequila. Come on.

[Zach Amico]

There's gotta. Yeah, there's gotta. There's got to be ulterior motives there. And they. They don't. Were they all killed differently?

[Shannon (Producer/Researcher)]

So they're. It seems like, because they're investigating. Like they're holding on to the details very tightly right now. But they were all in this same, like, town, I guess. Jalisco. And. Yeah, within the 11 days. One of them, they think might be this missing girl who's 22. I could show you her missing, but they haven't. They haven't confirmed any of the identities yet. Not publicly.

[Zach Amico]

I bet we got a serial killer. Isn't the most prolific serial killer from Mexico.

[Shannon (Producer/Researcher)]

Let me see.

[Zach Amico]

I believe. I believe the person that has the record was Albert Fish.

[JP McDade]

And it's a translation of Albert Pescato.

[Zach Amico]

I believe the hot. Because a lot of the people that have the highest numbers are bullshit.

[JP McDade]

Juan Wayne Gacy.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah. I mean, he did kill construction workers. He did kill day laborers.

[Shannon (Producer/Researcher)]

The most prolific serial killer is from Colombia.

[Zach Amico]

Colombia. Okay. And is that the. Were they like, a war? What was their deal? Was a warlord.

[Shannon (Producer/Researcher)]

His name is Luis Garavito, and he confessed to torturing and murdering at least 193, but potentially over 300 children and teenagers in the 1990s.

[Zach Amico]

Yep. That'll do it.

[Molly Viman]

Did he say why?

[Heather May]

I thought that was inflated.

[JP McDade]

Yeah, so they wouldn't stop playing with those damn Tamagotchis.

[Zach Amico]

I know Henry Lee Lucas gets a high body count, but he was just bullshitting. Yeah, because they would give him special privileges. Yeah, like he would get strawberry milkshakes every day if he Admitted to murders.

[Molly Viman]

Yeah.

[Heather May]

Definitely inflated some of his.

[Zach Amico]

Yes. And I know because Henry Lucas, basically, a lot of cops were using him to wrap up missing person cases that they didn't want to actually investigate. So they would call him. He got to answer the phone on his own hotline. Like, he would just be sitting there.

[JP McDade]

Hey, that's Kleiner in his cell.

[Zach Amico]

Oh, no.

[JP McDade]

He had, like, station.

[Zach Amico]

They would keep giving him shit for everything he admitted to. So he just gets fat in prison and is admitting to. Like, they'll take. And they'll be like, you did this. Right. And then he'll take him to the wrong spot.

[JP McDade]

Depends if there's some lasagna in it for me.

[Zach Amico]

Then maybe they'll. He'll take him to the wrong spot, and they'll be like, I think you meant here. And it'll be like, yep, that's when I did it.

[Molly Viman]

They didn't even feed the West Memphis Three like that when they were making him. Them admit to.

[Zach Amico]

Well, one of them was. It was the special needs.

[Molly Viman]

But they should have at least been feeding him if they were going to trick him like that.

[Zach Amico]

I mean, why wait? I mean, if he's already.

[Heather May]

They didn't.

[Zach Amico]

If you're gonna.

[Heather May]

You don't gotta go the extra mile.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah. What's the point?

[JP McDade]

Like, at least give the kids candy.

[Molly Viman]

Yeah, yeah. They, like, we're just tricking a kid and you didn't even give him any food.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah, I guess it would have been that.

[Molly Viman]

So that they get more time off, because that's why they're doing it. They're just like, yeah, I don't want to work. I just want to get this person guilty.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah.

[Molly Viman]

And I don't have to look into anyone else.

[Zach Amico]

I feel like that was a hit job from the beginning, though, because they wanted Damian Echols out of that town, period. I don't know how you feel. Are you familiar with West Memphis Three?

[JP McDade]

No.

[Molly Viman]

It's alternative oppression.

[Zach Amico]

So we could. On Friday's episode, we go into a deep dive on Uncle Eddie Savitz, the most notorious prolific pedophile in Philadelphia history. So this will be a fun one.

[Molly Viman]

Calling a pedophile prolific.

[JP McDade]

Prolific.

[Heather May]

I don't know how that was Epstein.

[Zach Amico]

Oh, dude. Eddie Savage, when he got arrested the

[JP McDade]

last time, he influenced all other pedophiles after that.

[Zach Amico]

Dude. 180 trash bags full of used boys, underwear and socks.

[JP McDade]

Oh, Hefty bags.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah.

[JP McDade]

Xls. Oh, no.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah. And the more you dig into it, you realize he was part of a boys and girls program where he worked With Jerry Sandusky.

[JP McDade]

Damn.

[Zach Amico]

And then you start to unravel.

[JP McDade]

They formed a super group. Yeah, they really were prolific together.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah, See? Yeah. They were like Wings, the Dirty Mac. I think he died in the early 90s.

[Molly Viman]

Oh, okay. So, yeah, kind of.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah. And he was like. He was like, it goes up high in the government because they were running, like, boys and girls clubs and specifically, like, delivering kids.

[Heather May]

And they didn't kill these kids.

[Zach Amico]

No.

[JP McDade]

Like the Franklin Mint, something like that. Franklin scandal.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah. Yeah. They know. They were just the boys and, like,

[Heather May]

the scouts of the Boys and girls club. They walking around, send out traumatized.

[Zach Amico]

They would send out. So they would basically get one or two kids in a financial relationship and then have them pyramid scheme. Other kids in.

[Heather May]

It did pave the way for Epstein.

[Zach Amico]

Exactly. It's 100% exactly the model. Yeah. We go deep into it on Friday, so I don't want to spoil it, but let's tell JP a little bit. So the West, West Memphis 3 was Damien Echols, who's like, this weirdo goth kid, and his two friends get arrested for the murder of three young boys who are found.

[Molly Viman]

Oh, they're teenagers.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah, they're teenagers. And the town immediately goes into a satanic panic saying it was a ritual sacrifice

[Molly Viman]

and, oh, my God, Damian's so hot.

[Zach Amico]

And that these were satanic murders. One of these boys is mentally challenged, and that's the one they got to. And that's the evidence they used was his confession.

[JP McDade]

Yeah.

[Molly Viman]

One of the little kids, like, dicks were cut off, like, and they were just by the river.

[Zach Amico]

Yes.

[Molly Viman]

And so because these kids were, like, wearing black and, like, listening to Metallica, they were, like, targeted, even though it's not like it was some puritanical little town. It was like, smackdown. Everyone's on method and, like, the documentaries are amazing because the people are.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah.

[Molly Viman]

Fucking crazy.

[Zach Amico]

There's three documentaries.

[Molly Viman]

Paradise Lost. One, two, and three.

[Zach Amico]

Yes. And then. So then a bunch of musicians wound up raising a bunch of money for their defense fund.

[Shannon (Producer/Researcher)]

Yeah.

[Molly Viman]

Because they were going to. They were on death row. One of them was on.

[Zach Amico]

I think Damien was.

[Molly Viman]

Yeah, they were going to. Yeah.

[Zach Amico]

And the more you get it, it's three long docs, and each one, they come out with one or two things where you're like, ah, fuck.

[Molly Viman]

Yeah.

[Zach Amico]

The.

[Molly Viman]

The Dixie Chucks stood up.

[Zach Amico]

Yes.

[Molly Viman]

Johnny Depp stood up.

[Zach Amico]

Yes, he did. Trying to think that's a great group of people to have.

[JP McDade]

Yeah. So does it appear like they were not guilty or.

[Zach Amico]

It's almost impossible that they Were there?

[JP McDade]

Yeah.

[Zach Amico]

Like they. There is no evidence tying them to it except some circumstantial shit, I believe. Also a lot of the wounds on the kids could have been animals because they were left out in a swamp as well as. Isn't the one kid. So spoiler. The one kid's stepfather was a fucking weirdo. Freak is a bizarro, man.

[JP McDade]

You're telling me those three kids had a weird stepdad involved? I don't believe it.

[Zach Amico]

And one of the things that they're using in the case is that these kids, the bodies had human bite marks on them. Their step. The one stepdad got all his teeth removed after.

[JP McDade]

Yeah, that's a tough one.

[Zach Amico]

That's. I don't know.

[Molly Viman]

The parents are all, every single one of them of the victims. Their parents are insane. Like, one of them is like praying that the boys, the teenagers get raped in prison and in hell. Like this is all being documentary.

[Zach Amico]

And then eventually one of the stepdads gives the filmmakers as a present a folding knife and they take it back and open it up and it's covered in human blood. And people are still going, I think these kids did it.

[JP McDade]

He gave the filmmaker that Marilyn Manson,

[Zach Amico]

very likely the murder weapon. And people like, nah, I still think it's the kid with the long black hair.

[Molly Viman]

Yeah. It's an amazing documentary.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah. If you want to get. If you really want to. My. How did you feel about the Staircase?

[Molly Viman]

Are you guys the wife that was the Staircase.

[Heather May]

Peterson.

[Zach Amico]

Yes.

[Heather May]

Yeah.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah.

[Heather May]

It's been a while.

[Molly Viman]

It's been a while since I've seen it too. That's why I'm.

[Zach Amico]

I watched it on DV when Netflix was still DVDs.

[Molly Viman]

Yeah.

[Zach Amico]

I watched the first 10 episode doc.

[Heather May]

Yeah.

[Zach Amico]

Then they did the. It was Toni Collette in the.

[Molly Viman]

It's the hbo.

[Zach Amico]

In the HBO one. And I gotta tell you, I love her. One of the most unexpected but realistic ass eating scenes in media history. Cause they just cut to her bent over the kitchen counter and he's in there.

[Heather May]

It's on Max now, would you say?

[Zach Amico]

I believe so. Okay.

[JP McDade]

But great timestamp on that. Yeah.

[Zach Amico]

Great piece of business. And they go over all the different, like, ways it could have happened.

[Molly Viman]

Yeah.

[JP McDade]

Rashomon type of. Everyone has a different story.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah. And they act out each one.

[Shannon (Producer/Researcher)]

It's on Netflix, by the way.

[Zach Amico]

Oh, thank you.

[Molly Viman]

Thank you.

[JP McDade]

The documentary is.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah, the, the, the. The original 10 episode.

[JP McDade]

Yeah.

[Molly Viman]

The Tony Collette.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah. It's still called the Staircase.

[Heather May]

Okay.

[JP McDade]

I remember from, from the documentary. The, the guy's 911 call because they say he's an actor. He took acting classes at least. And his 911 calls like, oh, no, my woman, my love, she's dead. It was the most rehearsed sounding.

[Zach Amico]

It's horrible.

[Molly Viman]

And isn't there like an owl thing? They're like an owl.

[Zach Amico]

They get into that after the first documentary.

[Molly Viman]

Yeah.

[Zach Amico]

So first of all, what's great about it is they do a very good job of convincing you he's innocent and then giving you information where you're like, fuck. And then convincing you he's innocent and then dropping another thing. So first thing, they find a ton of military themed gay porn on his computer. And he was a famous.

[JP McDade]

Sure.

[Zach Amico]

He wrote military fiction.

[JP McDade]

You thought the original Major Pain was funny.

[Zach Amico]

Well, look what it did to one of the Waynes.

[JP McDade]

That's right.

[Zach Amico]

So you find out immediately, he has boyfriends for years. He has this huge collection of military themed gay porn. And he says, well, me and my wife had an arrangement. She knew I was bisexual. And, you know. All right.

[Molly Viman]

Yeah.

[Zach Amico]

And then at about a halfway point, they go, oh, he was married before, but she died. And they go, oh, how? And they go, she was found dead at the bottom of a staircase. And his lawyer goes, you gotta tell us that. Like, buddy, you gotta.

[JP McDade]

I didn't think it would come up.

[Zach Amico]

You gotta let. So then they had to go to Germany and dig her up to do a new autopsy. And it's a beautiful piece of business. I love. They film everything, both sides. And the defense's reason for it was they said that they were so convinced he was innocent that they thought it was a proof that if they showed everything. Yeah, but all it is, the lawyer is just being like, you fucked us, dude. And at one point he's got to testify. And they start. They go, all right, first things first, we got to trim your eyebrows because you look fucking crazy.

[Heather May]

Yeah.

[Zach Amico]

Also, we're going to give you half of a Valium, because when you get up there, you start talking too fast and you find out, like, how, like, they do mock trials at his house.

[Heather May]

Yep.

[Zach Amico]

But yes, then the owl thing comes out after the first set of duck and he gets. What does he get? Convicted or not? Then they find out she had owl feathers in her hair. And some of the wounds on her head that they had thought were a fire poker may have been owl claws. And she was hammered and may have actually, it is very possible, was attacked by an owl. Which makes it way funnier.

[Molly Viman]

Yes.

[Zach Amico]

Because then they have to act that Out. And after watching this woman be brutally murdered a few times, now it's just owl attack.

[JP McDade]

The actor who plays the husband plays the owl.

[Heather May]

It's like Owen.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah. He comes in in a full owl suit. How many stabs does it take to kill a woman? A one, a two? Slit your throat? Three. Three stabs. Okay. Ohio woman charged over wild kindergarten graduation brawl. Denies being aggressor.

[Heather May]

Man.

[Zach Amico]

Let's be the judge of that video, please.

[Shannon (Producer/Researcher)]

So just before I show it to you, the only information that I have as to like, what led to this is apparently it's a. An argument over the seating arrangement. So I think one of them was just trying to like, guard a whole bunch of seats for their family. And then an argument started because.

[Zach Amico]

Good, good, good.

[JP McDade]

The ceremony was over.

[Shannon (Producer/Researcher)]

Is this girl in the pink that they charged?

[Zach Amico]

Oh, okay. Oh, she wore her nicest heart pajamas.

[Molly Viman]

She looks like she's wearing a diaper too. It's in a gymnasium. It's so big.

[JP McDade]

Like, how many kids are in this kindergarten class?

[Zach Amico]

Yeah. Where could. You know what? I bet every seat's a good seat at that kindergarten graduation.

[Molly Viman]

Here.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah. You can't get a bad seat. There's no obstructed view.

[Heather May]

As an ex early childhood teacher.

[Zach Amico]

I'm listening.

[Heather May]

Could 100% see this playing out.

[Zach Amico]

Is it that they think if they're in the front, it means they optically look like better parents?

[Heather May]

Oftentimes I didn't see any balloons or like flowers, but you often will see a lot of that. It's the best day to show up.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah.

[Heather May]

You always put your best foot forward to start.

[JP McDade]

Put your good pajamas on.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah, yeah. The nice heart pajamas with fuzzy boots.

[Heather May]

Yes, yes, absolutely.

[Molly Viman]

She's a diva.

[Heather May]

But I couldn't. I need slow mo. Because I couldn't tell.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah, let's. I mean, let's throw it around the horn again. I love a brawl.

[Heather May]

Okay, there's a pink.

[Molly Viman]

Where are the children?

[Zach Amico]

So she's not.

[Heather May]

Definitely didn't start.

[Molly Viman]

There's a balloon. There's a balloon.

[Zach Amico]

And now she's dragging this woman away. Pajamas is now involved.

[Heather May]

She had to take an ass beating and the responsibility.

[Molly Viman]

And is that a black man on the ground

[Zach Amico]

in the back?

[Molly Viman]

Yeah, like the. The person in the beginning that's like on the ground, I think. I can't tell.

[Zach Amico]

Let's try. Let's see one more time.

[JP McDade]

Listen. If it.

[Zach Amico]

That would appear to buy the shoes to be a gentleman.

[Molly Viman]

Yeah.

[JP McDade]

If they didn't want them brawling, they shouldn't have put out folding Chairs.

[Zach Amico]

It would look like. Yeah, that is it. They should have had the tables and ladders, too.

[JP McDade]

Throw some, like, those fluorescent lights.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah.

[JP McDade]

In there.

[Molly Viman]

I want to, like, a gym, you

[Heather May]

know, they have bleachers. Just move the set. Like, the kids don't have to be on the stage.

[Molly Viman]

I really.

[Heather May]

These are the things I would have. Problem solved.

[Molly Viman]

I want to, like, zoom in and see if there's a kid peeking through the curtain.

[JP McDade]

Like, scared little cap on.

[Molly Viman]

Yeah.

[Zach Amico]

Now, can I ask you a question, as a former teacher? Do parents come drunk to, like this?

[Heather May]

I never had any experiences where. Oh, more like I taught special ed.

[Zach Amico]

Okay.

[Heather May]

And then became an admission.

[Zach Amico]

So they were just drunk when they were pregnant.

[Heather May]

So. Yes. Also at pickup sometimes. Like, there was one time where I had to, like, intervene to make sure a kid did not go home with that parent. And occasionally for case conferences.

[Zach Amico]

Okay.

[Heather May]

Or they would call in instead of come to the conference because of, like, a known drinking problem.

[Zach Amico]

Okay. So because I. I only. Growing up, one of the kids I went to high school with, dad got caught hammered at a football game, and he got banned.

[Molly Viman]

I feel like that's normal at a football game.

[Zach Amico]

At a kid's football game.

[Molly Viman]

High school football is, like, serious.

[Heather May]

He probably had to do something, like,

[Zach Amico]

I think, or the police would have had to determine if you're a grown. I think. Yeah. He was, like, fighting with people, and they got caught having whiskey on him. I think. I think if you're a grown man getting loaded at a high school football game, it's a real issue.

[Heather May]

Pounds on which town?

[Zach Amico]

Yeah.

[Heather May]

Take it real.

[Molly Viman]

My hometown. Sounds like. I feel like that would just happen. Like, a lot of people.

[JP McDade]

It depends on how good of a high school football player you were.

[Zach Amico]

Oh, yeah, you gotta revisit.

[Molly Viman]

Yeah.

[Zach Amico]

And then another. I went to school with one. My one friend had a move because his dad got drunk and walked on. Saw his son getting beat up and walked and just fucking fucked the kid up. They were gone. Quick shout out to the Yamanashis.

[JP McDade]

That's kind of nice.

[Zach Amico]

So a kid was beating the shit out of his kid. Yeah. Yeah. I think he broke his arm.

[Molly Viman]

Oh, my dad beat up a kid because he stole my brother's bike. And so he just got in his truck and started looking for the guy on the bike. And he just got out and, like, ran up to him while he was biking and shoved him into the woods and grabbed the bike and threw in the truck, and then came back and started, like, I guess kicking the kid, like, more into the woods and Just shoved him.

[Heather May]

I think that would have been.

[Molly Viman]

Well, I think because the punishment would

[JP McDade]

have fit the crime.

[Molly Viman]

Well, you know, to let that one go. I don't have a normal. But then I remember the kid's dad came over. And then my dad and his dad had a fight in, like, our front yard.

[Zach Amico]

Who won?

[Molly Viman]

My dad.

[Zach Amico]

Nice.

[Molly Viman]

Yeah.

[Zach Amico]

So he's undefeated for the day.

[Molly Viman]

Yeah. I mean, it was just that guy's turn. I had my turn. Everyone had a turn.

[Zach Amico]

It would suck to get your. Get your whole family gets beat up by one guy in a day.

[Molly Viman]

We never had to move, though. And I honestly don't remember it being that big of a deal.

[Heather May]

No police.

[Zach Amico]

No.

[Heather May]

Yeah. Just had to take an ass feeding from the other dad.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah.

[Heather May]

Honestly, that's.

[Zach Amico]

I think that's fair.

[Heather May]

That's kind of a good turnout.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah, I. I'm not a litigious person. I think we can still square. I think if it's a fair one. There's nothing wrong with that. Yes. I was so growing up, every once in a while, my wrestling coach, if there was going to be. He was the gym teacher. And if there was going to be something he was a proponent of. We will lock you two in the wrestling room. It's padded. You can't get. You're not going to land on concrete. You're not going to, you know, you're not going to hit a wall. Everything's padded. And you two go in there and you come out when it's done.

[Heather May]

That's how men do things.

[Zach Amico]

And I think that maybe we could use a little more of that. I don't know. How about you guys feel I rather

[JP McDade]

do that than go through the courts?

[Zach Amico]

100%.

[Heather May]

Yeah.

[JP McDade]

I'll put on a little singlet, some headgear.

[Molly Viman]

I don't even know how to sue someone. I don't think I believe in suing anyone, but I don't even think I would know how if I did believe in it.

[Zach Amico]

You got to get a lawyer.

[Molly Viman]

But, like, that sounds like so much.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah, it does sound like I rather just settle it.

[JP McDade]

It's ultimately just a really intense delivery of papers.

[Molly Viman]

Yeah. I feel like I just take the L on pretty much anything. Like, the NYPD stole my car recently, and I'm just like, okay, I would give up.

[Zach Amico]

When you say stole your car. They repossessed.

[Molly Viman]

They illegally towed it.

[Zach Amico]

Okay.

[Molly Viman]

And then they were like, we're selling it. Because I didn't know that they had towed it.

[Zach Amico]

Because you weren't keeping track of your vehicle.

[Molly Viman]

Yeah. But they Illegal. Like, they had no grounds. Like, they made up a reason to tow my car that was parked very illegally.

[Zach Amico]

Okay.

[Molly Viman]

They took it and then they tried.

[JP McDade]

Is your car black?

[Molly Viman]

No, it's white. It's a white Corolla.

[JP McDade]

Well, now I don't even know what the reason now.

[Molly Viman]

It's not a car because it doesn't exist to me anymore. But I'm just like, well, it's kind of easier to not have a car here.

[Zach Amico]

How long did it take you to notice your car was missing?

[Molly Viman]

Like, two weeks because of the blizzard. It was during the blizzard.

[Zach Amico]

Okay.

[JP McDade]

I couldn't even find it. It's a white car.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah.

[Molly Viman]

It's gonna be fine. Like, it's out there. And. Yeah, not great. Do I have some fault in the story? Sure. But, like, it was more like, I definitely could.

[Heather May]

Responsibility to notify you.

[Molly Viman]

I could sue, definitely, but there's no way. I just don't have that fight in me.

[Zach Amico]

It would. It seems like an uphill battle unless you had a really powerful team behind you.

[Molly Viman]

Well, when I went to the lot to go get stuff out of my car because they wouldn't let me take my car either. As a whole thing. The. The cop that drove me to my car was like, you should definitely sue us.

[JP McDade]

But if you sue for a reasonable figure, I think you can win. I think they'll just settle. If it's not like a crazy amount

[Heather May]

of money, I think sue the tow company. And they're. They're prepared for that. They just like.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah. They have insurance for that, I would assume.

[Molly Viman]

Yeah, we'll see.

[Zach Amico]

I. I encourage you to. To. To look into your options or have someone do it for you.

[Molly Viman]

Yeah, okay. That sounds better.

[JP McDade]

Just show up at your nearest police precincts.

[Heather May]

I'll look up New York law. I. I looked up Florida law very deeply.

[Molly Viman]

My Florida.

[JP McDade]

There's Florida law.

[Heather May]

Yeah, yeah.

[Zach Amico]

Believe it or not.

[Heather May]

Especially for elder elderly people.

[JP McDade]

Oh, yeah.

[Heather May]

A tow company took advantage of my boyfriend's parents, like, right on their deathbed,

[JP McDade]

and damn, they took a jet scooter.

[Heather May]

They sold a 35. Actually, they didn't even sell it. They acquired a $35,000 Jeep because nobody showed up to the auction.

[JP McDade]

Wow.

[Heather May]

And they did not do everything by the book, 100%. But basically, in the end, we found out we weren't going to get anywhere, so we did eventually give up.

[Molly Viman]

But, yeah, Florida sounds like crazy.

[Heather May]

You have much more of a case.

[Molly Viman]

I think I do. I think I just don't care. I'm like, I learned a lesson and I'LL move on.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah. Car. You learned a car's worth of a lesson.

[Molly Viman]

Yes.

[Zach Amico]

I think that's fair and like a

[Molly Viman]

lot of money, but like, it's fine.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah.

[Molly Viman]

A car's worth of money, but money is not real. That's how I feel. It comes as fast as about parking

[Heather May]

it and where she can park.

[Molly Viman]

Yeah. Like, I'm actually kind of saving money by not having a car.

[Zach Amico]

100, you know, so I. I agree with you wholeheartedly.

[Molly Viman]

Thank you.

[Zach Amico]

I wonder how fun it is to go to police auctions.

[JP McDade]

It seem awesome.

[Zach Amico]

It does seem really.

[Molly Viman]

It's not like the insurance companies, when they repossess, they try to get the most that they can. The cop car. Like the NYPD to lot, they're just trying to sell it for anything. So you could get a car for very cheap.

[Zach Amico]

That would be sick. I want a car with bolt holes in it.

[Molly Viman]

Yeah, I'm sure.

[Zach Amico]

I want something done in a horrible crime. That would be fun.

[Heather May]

Good backstory.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah, I want something. I want something. I want something up to happen in that car. You know, Haunted car, like Christine. That would be sick. I. I have a friend that goes to auctions after trials and buys pieces of serial killers houses.

[Molly Viman]

Whoa.

[Zach Amico]

She goes with John Waters. What?

[Molly Viman]

They don't just have estate sales.

[Zach Amico]

It's a bit different. It's stuff that was used in the trial. So she has the pulleys from Ed Gein's apartment. From Ed Gein's farm. Excuse me.

[Heather May]

That's very controversial that that stuff was sold.

[Zach Amico]

Yes. She has the numbers off of Dahmer's door.

[Molly Viman]

Oh, my God.

[Zach Amico]

She has a bunch of cool shit.

[Molly Viman]

I think that's cool. Like some people collect Nazi shit. Yeah, that's, to me, way weirder.

[JP McDade]

Charles Manson is a nice combination of the two.

[Molly Viman]

Yeah.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah.

[JP McDade]

Scratch all those itches with one.

[Molly Viman]

You have a good point.

[JP McDade]

This Nazi shit used to belong to Charles Manson.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah. Lemmy from Motorhead. His entire wall in his apartment was SS Knives. And it's not great optically, but he just. I think he just like Knives.

[JP McDade]

Hey, man, I need to spread some jam on my toast.

[Molly Viman]

Yeah, but see, whoever gets that, like, it's almost like less weird because it was Lemmy's if you buy. You know what I mean?

[Zach Amico]

Pretty cool.

[Molly Viman]

If you're a fan of Lemmy, you're like, sure, but Lemmy's weird as fuck for having that.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah. But he also spent his whole life playing video poker. Broke. Oh, yeah, that's his wall.

[Heather May]

Oh, my.

[Zach Amico]

He had a few. He had he had a few.

[JP McDade]

I guess you could look at it as, like, they were taken off of German soldiers. They're like trophies of war.

[Zach Amico]

I could. I could see using that as justification, especially would he be of the age? He was probably very little.

[JP McDade]

He's English. Right. They didn't care for the Nazis.

[Zach Amico]

He probably might have been a very young kid getting bombed. Didn't Ozzy have memories of World War II blitz?

[JP McDade]

Was he that old?

[Zach Amico]

So that might almost be like.

[JP McDade]

He might have been shipped off.

[Zach Amico]

That might feel cool, like taking it back.

[Molly Viman]

Yeah.

[JP McDade]

They got all the kids out of London. They shipped them off to the countryside. So the adults stayed in the. In the underground tubes.

[Zach Amico]

Okay, Bombed. There we go. To me, that would make sense. Lemmy's also spent his entire life in front of a video poker machine.

[JP McDade]

Respect.

[Zach Amico]

He lived by a bar and he would just go sit and play video poker. All that. Like, he had. No.

[Heather May]

That does something to a person.

[Zach Amico]

Shit to do. That was his thing. All day. Every. Like. I think they saved his seat now at that bar.

[JP McDade]

I would've loved to know his system.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah. If I wasn't good,

[Molly Viman]

if I had money, I would own a slot machine and do the same thing all day.

[Zach Amico]

Well, he didn't own it. He was putting his money into. He put so much in. He could have just got the slot machine in the house and played for his money, but instead he spent all day playing video poker. Just.

[Heather May]

You don't get the same dopamine from that.

[Zach Amico]

I remember I listened to an interview with somebody that managed him at one point and how he was always broke and he couldn't. They're like, let me. You had one hit and you've been touring for 40 years. But I do believe he wrote Mama, I'm Coming Home for Ozzy and Kiss

[JP McDade]

from a Rose for Seal.

[Zach Amico]

Very, very, very obscure fact.

[JP McDade]

That was.

[Zach Amico]

Lemme. Shannon, could you. Somebody wrote Mama, I'm Coming Home for Ozzy, and I want to say it might be Lemmy.

[JP McDade]

I mean, it's a. It's a nice way for a sober person to support the bar that they're going to.

[Zach Amico]

Yes, well, he was not.

[JP McDade]

He was not at all.

[Zach Amico]

He though. He was.

[Heather May]

He was double supporting.

[JP McDade]

Yeah, he was playing that game with the Nazi knife, jamming it between his fingers on the bar.

[Shannon (Producer/Researcher)]

It says it was a co. Written by Ozzy, Zakk Wilde and Lemmy.

[Zach Amico]

Yep, there we go. Yeah. No, he was pouring money into. Didn't speak. There's a story of Lemmy that James Gunn told the guy who made Guardians and the new Superman. He started out in indie movies in the company I work for. And they took Lemmy to a strip club after the shoot for the day. And they said they were just sitting down. And Lemmy runs at them and was like, we have to go home. And they're like, what? He goes, we're have to go fucking home. He spit his teeth out at a stripper by accident. His polynet gave out and he accidentally spit his dentures in a stripper's face while he was getting a lap dance.

[Heather May]

He had security on him so fast.

[JP McDade]

And what, just for tipping?

[Zach Amico]

Yeah. So James Gunn told that story on the Adam Carolla show. And I was interning at Troma at the time. And Lemmy people called Troma and they're like, we need James Gunn's address. And they're like, why? Because we're sending people to beat the shit out of him for television.

[Heather May]

Not like a C. We're sending a C synthesis.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah, we're sending a bunch of, like, British thugs.

[Heather May]

I think that would be much more

[Zach Amico]

effective to go get out of them. And so that Troma had to make a tribute to Lemmy video in exchange that he would not do that

[Molly Viman]

fair trade.

[Zach Amico]

That was just a regular thing I had to deal with. That was a day in that office. He was the man, though. He did our movies for a bottle of Maker's Mark.

[Molly Viman]

Hell, yeah.

[Zach Amico]

That was all he asked for was bottle of Maker's Mark. And then you brought some. Some of the girls from the set would come hang out. He didn't touch them. He didn't do anything. He just liked having girls in the room. Very respectful and just loaded. Can't understand a goddamn word he says in the movie. We had to put subtitles over him. But God bless President Lemmy.

[JP McDade]

His teeth are still at the Spearmint Rhino. That's made him even more hard to understand.

[Zach Amico]

Hey, guys. Today's episode is brought to you by our great [e-mail] home of the $60 kilo. That's right. Stop going to smoke shops, bodegas, or gas stations and getting a little bit of Kratom at a time. And you don't even know what's in there. When you go to yocratum.com today. They have the best streams of the best customer service. And they're the marquee sponsor of everything we do here at Gas. If you don't use Kratom, don't start on my account. But if you use Kratom for one of its many, many Benefits. There's only one place in the world and there's no promo code needed. Why? It's already the best deal in the world to kratom. 60 bucks for a whole kilo delivered right to your gosh darn door. So check them out today, guys. Yocratum.com Home of the $60 kilo. All right, let's get back into the program. Here's a fun one. Dog born with second penis, undergoes surgery for ultra rare birth defect.

[JP McDade]

Shannon to add a third.

[Shannon (Producer/Researcher)]

So the pictures are a little blurred, but you'll kind of get it on the show too.

[JP McDade]

I hope.

[Zach Amico]

A back penis.

[Shannon (Producer/Researcher)]

Yeah, it was kind of like attached to his leg and his leg was also deformed. It's like fused at the joint and then there's a. Another angle of it.

[Zach Amico]

Oh, it's hard.

[Heather May]

Does it still have a redst?

[Molly Viman]

Oh, I want the uncensored. What is this, Japan?

[JP McDade]

I'm good.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah. Now if it was Japan, that would be lunch.

[Molly Viman]

Yeah.

[Zach Amico]

And they, they got it, Shannon. They took care of this poor pup. Did they get rid of the deformed leg?

[Shannon (Producer/Researcher)]

They didn't get rid of it, no, they. They fixed it. I guess they fixed his leg and it helped the quality of his life. And they said that the other penis was non functioning anyway, so it would have jeopardized his health.

[Zach Amico]

You know, people always talk about dog dicks and dog balls. As far as something you see, sometimes people don't note that some dogs have really sloppy vaginas.

[Molly Viman]

Oh, my dog had a fat pussy when she went into heat. But I got her fixed.

[Zach Amico]

Okay.

[Molly Viman]

But it was like shocking because she's so small. It was like taking up half her size. Like, it was.

[Zach Amico]

My friend had a pit bull. You could just see a girl pit bull and when she was in heat, she had to wear a diaper.

[Heather May]

Oh, yeah.

[Zach Amico]

Because she would just fucking wreck the joint with fucking. Yeah, Grossness.

[Molly Viman]

Yeah.

[Zach Amico]

This thing had like lips on it.

[Shannon (Producer/Researcher)]

Yeah.

[Zach Amico]

It was like, it was notable for from a distance.

[Molly Viman]

But like, this is why girl dogs are better because boy dogs like girl dogs. Their are like away. Like if you're. If you're rubbing a dog's belly, you're also giving it a hand job when it's a guy. And I hate that.

[Zach Amico]

I think you're rubbing too low.

[Molly Viman]

It's like in the middle of their belly.

[Zach Amico]

I think you can avoid it.

[Molly Viman]

You can, but like if you're like talking to someone and you're like, ah,

[Zach Amico]

I jerked off the dog. Hold on. I jerked off the dog.

[Molly Viman]

Again, it just feels really cr. Crazy.

[Zach Amico]

I was on the phone, like, why

[Molly Viman]

isn't it further down? Like the are on a dog.

[Zach Amico]

Probably for access.

[Heather May]

The mounting.

[Molly Viman]

I just. I think I don't like boy dogs for that reason.

[Heather May]

One too many red rockets and they

[Molly Viman]

open up inside and you have to wait until it goes down to separate dogs. Because my dog got raped in front of me and I tried to separate.

[JP McDade]

Oh.

[Molly Viman]

And it was not a thing.

[Zach Amico]

Were they stuck butt to butt?

[Molly Viman]

Yes. Because they tried to run away.

[Heather May]

Oh God.

[Zach Amico]

Wow. Like a Chinese finger trap.

[Molly Viman]

It was.

[JP McDade]

It's a rough one.

[Zach Amico]

I have a. There's nothing funnier to me. The idea of a big dog and a little dog having sex. But then sometimes you see the result of it and it does look like God's mistake.

[Molly Viman]

Oh, like the pit bull dachshunds.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah. Because then you think like, oh God, I hope this was done artificially.

[Molly Viman]

And I don't think it is.

[Zach Amico]

No. I think it just happens out there.

[JP McDade]

Yeah. Min pins are the spawn of Satan. Yeah. They're not supposed to exist. Very evil looking little dogs.

[Zach Amico]

Do you think dogs know not to be attracted to dogs based on like breed or they just. That's a dog. I'll fuck it.

[JP McDade]

I don't think they think about it

[Zach Amico]

too deeply because like would a wolf. A bulldog?

[JP McDade]

Probably.

[Heather May]

Probably.

[Molly Viman]

I don't know. I actually don't know. I don't think so.

[Zach Amico]

For the sake of science, can we find out?

[Molly Viman]

I don't think it'd. Because of a lack of attraction. I think it would be like, you're behaving different than I do, so we might not be the same. Like a bulldog's not gonna ask. Yeah, yeah.

[Zach Amico]

It would be funny, the idea of a wolf fucking a bulldog, but then like trying to sneak her out the back and not let the other wolves see in the morning. I'm sorry, man.

[JP McDade]

I had to jump on the grenade last night.

[Zach Amico]

I had some fermented grapes.

[JP McDade]

I'm still the alpha, right?

[Zach Amico]

Yes. Dogs are readily mate with how they breathe. Since all domestic dogs belong to the same species, Canis lupus, they are biologically capable of interbreeding. Because dogs do not recognize breed distinctions, they their mating choices are driven by instinct rather than pedigree. Bring it down.

[Heather May]

The other dog's not a dumbass.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah, bring it down. Let's read a little more.

[JP McDade]

Let's talk about personalities more than anything else.

[Zach Amico]

Dogs share the same genetic framework. They could successfully reproduce, create healthy, viable mixed breed puppies. Dogs do not understand or care about breed standards. So they don't see race, they don't

[Molly Viman]

see color, they don't see breed.

[Zach Amico]

They only recognize the scent and behavioral cues of a potential mate. Oh. Obviously things have size differences. While a small male can technically impregnate a large female, extreme size disparities, such as a Chihuahua and a Great Dane. Now I'm just picturing Scooby Doo and the Taco Bell dog.

[Molly Viman]

Right.

[Zach Amico]

Often make natural mating physically impossible or unsafe. A female must be in heat to be receptive to a male. However, intact males pursue any female in heat, regardless of her breed. If a very large male mates with a much smaller female, it can be dangerous for potentially leading to injuries during the tie when the dogs are temporarily locked together or complications with the prey. Does that mean the puppies are too big to be inner?

[Heather May]

Maybe that can be because a lot

[Molly Viman]

of dogs die from giving birth. Birth. I think that's like a common thing.

[Zach Amico]

Man, you are sunshine in a bag, aren't you?

[Molly Viman]

But you can get a dog abortion.

[Zach Amico]

I'm sure you can.

[Molly Viman]

Yeah. Because my friend's big ass pit bull.

[Heather May]

They didn't overturn that one.

[Zach Amico]

No, it's still legal, thank God.

[Molly Viman]

But they're only pregnant for like two months.

[Zach Amico]

Oh, so you got to do it quick. Yeah, yeah, you gotta do it real quick.

[JP McDade]

In Texas, it's a five day limit.

[Molly Viman]

Yeah.

[Zach Amico]

All right, we are almost out of here. Let's do one or two more quick things. Here we go. You know what? Let's end on one of our favorite things. Horrible accidents. Woman knocked down and rolled over by her own car. One fun one to end the day on, huh?

[JP McDade]

Bright side of. Of getting your car stolen by.

[Molly Viman]

That will literally never happen.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah. Oh. Oh, no.

[JP McDade]

Oh. You saw that back wheel go up.

[Molly Viman]

Where is that?

[JP McDade]

It looks like a European model, a Renault.

[Molly Viman]

Okay. I don't think it went over her face for a second.

[Zach Amico]

That's what I thought, too.

[Heather May]

Seems like. Yeah, she's.

[Zach Amico]

You gotta feel like.

[Molly Viman]

Right.

[Zach Amico]

You gotta feel like a real silly goose. Yeah. To run yourself over.

[Molly Viman]

Wait, what was she even doing? I'm confused.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah, she had to bring that. Was she checking the.

[Shannon (Producer/Researcher)]

She was checking the battery under the hood.

[Zach Amico]

It worked, huh? Still running.

[Heather May]

Just wasn't in park.

[Zach Amico]

You gotta feel like a real. Isn't that how the kid from Star Trek died?

[JP McDade]

Yes.

[Zach Amico]

Anton Yelchin rolled down his driveway, like

[JP McDade]

he was checking his mail or something in the car, rolled down the driveway, hit him.

[Molly Viman]

It kind of looks like it's actually going up more than it is going down a hill at first. I was like, maybe it's because it's going down now.

[Zach Amico]

I think she was.

[Shannon (Producer/Researcher)]

She was pretty much fine. She didn't have any fractures, any serious injuries.

[Zach Amico]

That's crazy.

[Heather May]

She was a fractured ego.

[Shannon (Producer/Researcher)]

Not like an Indian.

[Zach Amico]

No. Well, we play a game on the show, Indians versus. It started as Indians versus Trains because they don't have a lot of safety regulations. And there is. I mean, countless hours of CCTV footage of Indian people running themselves over, getting run over by steamrollers touching live wires. Like, there was a guy that. Can we show them? Shannon, before we get out of here, this will be our last thing. Have you guys ever seen the drunk guy that goes to sit and he doesn't realize it's a giant bowl of soup?

[Heather May]

No.

[JP McDade]

Oh, God.

[Zach Amico]

We'll. We'll call it on this one. Shan, do you remember that video?

[Shannon (Producer/Researcher)]

I don't. Is an Indian guy.

[Zach Amico]

I want to say it is. Sits in boiling pot.

[JP McDade]

This was just a dream Zach had.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah.

[Molly Viman]

It was boiling. Yeah. I thought it was just like soup that was put.

[Shannon (Producer/Researcher)]

Is it the porridge one?

[Zach Amico]

Maybe. Let me see. Yep. So he's drunk. He goes to sit. Well, I assume he's drunk. I want you to think of the worst.

[Shannon (Producer/Researcher)]

Sorry. Let me find a better one.

[Zach Amico]

It's okay. Don't worry.

[JP McDade]

Who's making soup hot enough to kill you, though?

[Zach Amico]

These people.

[Molly Viman]

They didn't have the McDonald's, like, suing thing. Remember when McDonald's got sued for the hot coffee contents?

[Zach Amico]

And that, by the way, was a horrible injury? Like, yeah, so we've talked about that before. That was actually a really horrible injury, and they were totally at fault. But McDonald's hired a PR team to begin to spread stories saying that it was litigious. And, like, who doesn't know that coffee's hot?

[Molly Viman]

Yeah.

[Zach Amico]

So instead of. They tried to make her look stupid instead of them look. Because the coffee was, like, 20 or 30 degrees over what it was supposed

[Molly Viman]

to be, they were victim blaming.

[Zach Amico]

Yes, 100%. Shannon, did you find a better one?

[Molly Viman]

I'm not going to stop eating it, but that is.

[JP McDade]

All right.

[Zach Amico]

Put his hands on a boy real quick. Get out of here, you little scamp. Hold on, hold on. I'm fine. I got it. I'm all right. I'm okay. Oh, and now he's dying.

[Molly Viman]

No, that guy in the yellow shorts. Because he knew it was about to happen, and he pointed and laughed and then he pretended he was helping him.

[Heather May]

Wait, wait.

[Molly Viman]

And.

[Zach Amico]

Yeah.

[JP McDade]

Oh, dude, you're up. The gray suit.

[Molly Viman]

No, his balls are literally melting.

[Zach Amico]

Oh, he died. He dies in there.

[JP McDade]

God, that's horrible.

[Zach Amico]

That's got to be hard to explain to the family. Like, we have bad news and good news.

[JP McDade]

We have terrible news about Stu,

[Molly Viman]

but also happens a lot there.

[Zach Amico]

I think it happens more than you think.

[Molly Viman]

Yeah, I think so.

[Zach Amico]

I bet it's a way. Like, I bet at least one person has been told, we're really sorry. Your uncle fell at a bowl of soup and they went, I knew it. He was drunk, wasn't he?

[Molly Viman]

It was only a matter of time.

[Zach Amico]

You know what? Grandma said he was going to go like that. All right, that's our show. Thank you so much to JP McDade, Molly Viman and Heather May. Check out JP's special in Brooklyn.

[JP McDade]

From Brooklyn. Got it. In Brooklyn.

[Zach Amico]

In Brooklyn. I'll be on tour with Heather May June the fourth through seventh with Crack Amico. And we will be back this Friday with a bonus episode. Thank you so much for tuning in to the Morning zoo.

[Heather May]

Bye.

[Show Intro Voice]

Noon is morning time to him. Papa Baco. Chug it down. Just like the favorite obi's clown. Grab a coffee and join the crew. It's Acamiko morning, too. It's Acme. Go work Morning too.