← The Mindset Mentor
The Mindset Mentor
Feel Behind? (Do This For 30 Days)
00:17:44
Have you ever wondered if the biggest thing holding you back is the way you think about your life every single day? In this episode, I challenge you to go 30 days without complaining and show you how negativity quietly trains your brain to stay stuck, stressed, and focused on problems instead of possibilities. I’m going to teach you how to rewire your mindset, shift your perspective, and create real change in your relationships, emotions, and future by choosing gratitude over negativity every single day.
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- [00:00]
Rob Dial
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- [01:01]
Rob Dial
law Hey, a bad hire can really cost your business, and a great hire can really accelerate your business. Running a small business means every hire really matters. A bad hire can cost you time and money and momentum, and a good hire can help grow your business immensely. Finding great talent isn't easy when you don't have the time or resources to sift through resumes. LinkedIn's new hiring pro screens candidates for you, so instead of sorting through applicants, you can spend time talking to only the right ones. Get started by posting your job for free@LinkedIn.com dial terms and conditions apply. Welcome to today's episode of the Mindset Menstore podcast. I'm your host, Rob Dialogue. If you have not yet done so, hit that subscribe button so you never miss another episode. And quick before Today's episode on June 10th at 7pm Eastern, I'm running a free live training called break the ceiling 2026. This is for anyone who knows they're capable of more, but they keep hitting the same walls no matter what they try. We're going to dive into exactly what keeps that happening and how to actually change it so that your income, your relationships, your mindset in every area of your life can get better. You can register for free at breakthecealing2026.com once again, breakthesealing2026.com. Today I want to talk about how to have the biggest jump in your life in the next 30 days. I'm talking about one of those shifts where everything in your life changes. You start thinking differently, you feel differently, you carry yourself differently. The people around you can literally feel the difference in your energy. Because right now, most people are unknowingly reinforcing the exact mindset and emotional state that they're trying to escape from. And once you finally see it, you can't unsee it. And so today, I'm going to give you a challenge that sounds extremely simple on the surface, but it is challenging. But if you actually commit to it for 30 days, it will change your mind, your emotions, your nervous system, relationships, and honestly, probably the trajectory of your life. Okay, here's the challenge. Do not complain at all for 30 days. That's it. Now stay with me because this is way more in depth than it seems on the surface. No. Complaining means not out loud, not in your head, not through sarcasm, not through passive aggression, not through eye rolls, not through. I'm just being realistic thoughts. I mean, every single day for the next 30 days, you wake up you, and you make a commitment to yourself in the morning. And that commitment is for the next 24 hours. I will not complain. And every single time that you would normally complain, I want you to consciously find a way to switch your thoughts around that situation. And then you go to bed, and you wake up the next day, and you do it again, and you wake up the next day and you do it again, and the next day, and you do it again for 30 days. And watch how your mind becomes different, Watch how you feel different in your body, and watch how your life starts to actually shift. Because most people don't realize that they're not, like, stuck in circumstances. They're stuck because their brain has unconsciously been trained to find problems in everything. And finding problems will only keep you stuck. Because if you're only finding problems and your brain is only focusing on how to try to solve problems. But if you train your brain to constantly find what is wrong, it will. That's how the human brain works. There's actually a psychological principle that's called the negativity bias. It's one of the most studied concepts in neuroscience and psychology. It's basically this. Your brain is designed to find what is wrong as a way to protect you. Why? Because your brain was not designed to make you happy or successful or rich. You. Your brain was designed to keep you alive. Your ancestors survived because they noticed danger they noticed threats, they predicted threats. They could notice what was going to go wrong. The human that ignored the rustling in the bushes usually got eaten by the tiger. And so biologically, your brain is wired to scan for problems and threats and rejection and danger. And now, 200,000 years ago, that would be smart, and it would be called being safe. Today we call it finding the negative. Right, because we don't have to worry about tigers. And if you don't consciously train your brain, it will naturally drift towards the negative, quote, unquote. The fear, the scarcity, the complaints, the fake scenarios, the imagined arguments, the fearful futures, the possible failures in the future. And that's why some people can have beautiful lives and still be miserable. Because they have trained their brain to only notice what is wrong. One of my favorite quotes, your mind can make heaven out of hell or hell out of heaven. Your mind can make heaven out of hell or hell out of heaven. It's not your circumstances, it's what you think about your circumstances. That's why I have a tattoo right here. My wife and I on our left wrist have a tattoo and it says, this is heaven. Because I think that we, we can create heaven on earth, our version of it, right here in this moment, by the thoughts that we have. Most people think their thoughts are reality. They think the world is bad, people suck. Nothing ever works out. I'm not lucky. Every day is stressful. Life is exhausting. No, that's not reality. That's your thoughts. That's your conditioning. That's your reticular activating system filtering reality through negativity. Your articular activating system is part of the brain that decides what it wants to filter in and what it wants to filter out. So if you constantly complain, your brain becomes a professional problem finder. So when you look at it this way, like, what actually starts happening to you, when you start training your brain to look for the good, to not complain, but to find the positive, you start noticing opportunities where you used to know Lunato's problems before. Most people are so focused on what is wrong that that they completely miss what is possible. Their brain's constantly scanning for all of the problems, why something won't work, why life is unfair. Because that's what they focus on, that's what they see. But when you start consciously retraining your brain the same way that you would train a dog to stop complaining and to stop making yourself a victim, your mind starts to open up in a different way. You start seeing solutions faster. You start noticing opportunities that you never saw before you start taking more action. You start to see people different, you start to talk to people differently. You start to carry yourself differently. You start to see opportunities where you used to see roadblocks. And that's huge in getting yourself out of a rut and really turning your life around quickly. Why is that? Because a negative mind closes. It closes. It doesn't allow you to see outside of the possibilities. An empowered mind that doesn't complain, that sees opportunities, it expands. It's able to see more outside of what it normally does. A stressed brain looks at survival. That's all that it pays attention to. A grateful brain that starts to see outside of it starts to see possibilities. And so this changes your life. It doesn't just change like, oh, I'm going to be positive, right? Like, that's stupid. No, it changes your life in many different ways. Emotionally, financially, relationally, every single way. And we will be right back. Hey, showing up for yourself day in and day out and doing the hard things is what creates a better life. 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- [11:42]
Rob Dial
back to the show. Because opportunities are almost always hidden inside of the problems. So if you're only seeing problems, you're usually not training yourself to look for the opportunities in them. We need to train our brain to find those opportunities. The person complaining about their job misses the opportunity to learn the skills that they need to to be able to come better, right? The person that's complaining about being alone misses the opportunity to build themselves while they are alone. The person that's complaining about where they live misses the opportunity to create a plan to leave. Complaining blinds people and it keeps you stuck actively searching for good. And training your mind to find sharpens your mind. And when you stop seeing life as something that's happening against you and you start seeing it as something that's that has so many opportunities available to you, that's when you start getting ahead in life. It's not like life suddenly became easier, but your brain finally stopped looking for all of the mental roadblocks that were never there in the first place. Like think about it. No matter how bad you want Something to be rich or to be happy or to be build a successful business or to get into a relationship. If you're only seeing the roadblocks to getting to where you want to go, you won't even try to get to where you want to go because you're only seeing the roadblocks. So you have to understand, you need to see a different perspective in some sort of way if you're going to change your life. So much of our lives and what we complain about, people would love to have. Do you get that? Like, no matter where you are right now, there are millions, if not billions of people who would trade with you right now. Like, there's people in war torn countries that would love to have your life. People who didn't grow up with the same circumstance that you did. People who weren't given the opportunities that you've been given. And this is my opinion. A lot of us live in some people on earth's version of heaven on earth, and we sit there and complain about all of these. My tea wasn't hot enough today. Get your shit together, right? Like, have perspective on your life and how great this can actually be. I'm not saying you need to be rich and successful and full of happiness in order to realize that we do have some pretty good lives. Let me give you a couple of examples of what I see with people. Like, your kids are screaming, they're freaking out and you're like, oh my God, most people will complain, oh my God, these kids are driving me insane. Right, I get it. But then you can take a step back and go, can I see this from a different perspective? Like, do you know how many people wish that they had a child like yours right now for whatever reason, right? Like, they can't conceive, or maybe they lost a child, or maybe their children are all grown up and they miss when they were inside of the house and young and full of energy. And when we notice and we see that and we take a step back and we see our circumstances differently. Of like, oh man, many people would love to have this moment that I'm in. You can look at and go, oh my God, I am so damn grateful that I have healthy children. There are some people who would do anything to have what I have right now in this moment. I am so lucky. Right? Another example, like, you're stuck in traffic. You could be like, oh my God, this is unbelievable. I'm gonna be late. I hate being late, but my day is ruined. Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Instead you could be like, okay, I'm stuck in traffic. You know what? I've been actually needing some silence. I've been asking for some silence. I've been asking for some sort of a break. Maybe this is my moment to breathe. Maybe I should turn the music off. Maybe I should sit in silence for a minute. Maybe I should be with myself for five minutes. I've been asking for this. Maybe this is my opportunity. Not like, oh, boo hoo, right, Your alarm goes off in the morning and you're like, oh my God, I didn't sleep very well last night. Whatever, there was a thunderstorm, it woke me up. I don't want to get up. I want to sleep in. You know, you could do that or you could go, you know what? My alarm went off. I hear it. That means I'm alive. 150,000 people died yesterday. They would all want to trade places with me. I'm sure to have another day, and I get another day. Maybe I should look at it a little bit differently. Like, do you understand how radically those realities, like, they're so radically different? Through the children, through the traffic, through the waking up. Like it's the same life, it's a different lens. And so it's not your life that has to change, it's your lens that has to change first. And then your life will change. And so here's what starts happening. When you do this type of stuff for 30 days, your nervous system is going to start to change because complaining keeps your body in like stress mode. Every complaint reinforces cortisol and stress and irritation and victim mentality and helplessness. And so your brain starts expecting bad things. There's actually research on this from Stanford showing that chronic stress and repetitive negative thinking strengthens the neural pathways associated with anxiety in emotional reactivity. Meaning the more you complain, the easier it becomes to complain. More negative that you are, the more automatic your negativity becomes. Your brain wires itself around repetition. Not what you want, what you do, what you think. That's Hebb's law in neuroscience. Neuroscience says neurons that fire together wire together. So every inconvenience that creates negativity, you wire negativity deeper into your personality. But gratitude works the exact same way. Like research at UC Davis actually shows. They conducted one of the most famous gratitude studies that was ever done, where participants who practice gratitude consistently experienced greater optimism, better sleep, less stress, more happiness, improved energy, and just overall improved emotional well being. And the important part is this, their lives didn't necessarily change first. Their perception change first and their perception change. Their behavior and their behavior changes their identity. And identity will change your life. So that's why this challenge matters so much. You're not just thinking positive. That's what I'm trying to have you do. You're not just, like, being toxically positive. You're rewiring the filtering system of your mind. You are retraining yourself to stop unconsciously rehearsing suffering. Because, let's be honest, some people are addicted to their negative thoughts. And the brain starts treating this imagined stress that their brain come that their mind comes up with, like, real stress. And your body literally responds chemically to your thoughts. That's why you can think about an argument and your heart rate increases. That's why you can imagine embarrassment and start to feel anxious. It's not reality. It's your thoughts. The brain does not distinguish between vividly imagined experiences and real ones, which means that if you constantly imagine negativity, you biologically live inside of that negativity. And then people wonder why they feel stuck. They wonder why it's so hard to get moving. Because your brain cannot create expansion while constantly rehearsing fear. And this is why this challenge actually matters. For 30 days, no complaining. Every complaint gets interrupted with gratitude. Every negative thought gets redirected. Every inconvenience becomes an opportunity to consciously choose who you want to become. And eventually, if you do this, something amazing starts to happen. You stop being emotionally controlled by these little tiny things. Traffic stops ruining your day. People stop ruining your mood. Delays stop ruining your peace. You don't get triggered near as much as you used to. And your thoughts stop controlling how you feel. And you realize most suffering was never life itself. It was unconscious interpretation of life. Our perception of life is our problem, not our life. And this is important. I'm not saying become delusional. I'm not saying have toxic positivity. I'm not saying ignore your pain. I'm not saying pretend to be. Things are not hard when they're hard. What I'm saying is that you can either train your mind to look for darkness, or you can train your mind to find light. Whichever one you repeatedly choose becomes who you are. That's why after 30 days, you won't just feel better. You will literally start to become a different person. Because repetition rewires your brain. You're in control of that. And that repetition creates a different identity and eventually a different life. So this challenge is simple. Interrupt the pattern and decide. Who do I want to become from this moment forward? Do I want to become somebody who constantly finds what's wrong. Or someone who consciously trains themselves to see possibility and gratitude and beauty and growth and goodness even when life is imperfect. Because your life is always going to be imperfect. But your mind does not have to be at war with reality all of the time. And if you can master this, your life changes fast. So here's your challenge for 24 hours. No complaining. Make a commitment to yourself to start it today. And then you make that commitment every single morning for the next 30 days. Watch how your relationships change. Watch how your stress changes. Watch how your emotional baseline changes. Watch how much lighter your life feels. Because when you stop feeding negativity, you stop strengthening it. And when you stop strengthening it, you finally create space for peace. So that's what I got for you for today's episode. If you love this episode, please share with someone that you know and love. And I am also running a free live zoom lesson for anyone who knows that they're capable of more, but they keep getting in their own way. I'm going to teach you exactly why that keeps happening and what to do to finally change it so that your incoming relationships and your mindset all get better. Register for free@breakthesealing2026.com once again, break the ceiling2026.com and with that, I'm going to leave the same way Leave every single episode. Make it your mission to make somebody else's day better. I appreciate you and I hope that you have an amazing day. Hey Fidelity. How can I remember to invest every month? With the Fidelity app, you can choose a schedule and set up recurring investments in stocks and ETFs. 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- [22:49]
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- [23:13]
Rob Dial
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- [23:18]
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