We Were Wrong About Being Bored - The Mindset Mentor

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[00:00]
Rob Dial
Hey, a bad hire can really cost your business, and a great hire can really accelerate your business. Running a small business means every hire really matters. A bad hire can cost you time and money and momentum, and a good hire can help grow your business immensely. Finding great talent isn't easy when you don't have the time or resources to sift through resumes. LinkedIn's new hiring pro screens candidates for you, so instead of sorting through applicants, you can spend time talking to only the right ones. Get started by posting your job for free@LinkedIn.com dial terms and conditions apply. When it comes to health and wellness, the most important thing for me is to be able to trust what I put in my body. So whether you are tackling fitness goals, a wellness routine, or shopping for family essentials, Iherb is the one stop shop for vitamins, supplements, sports nutrition, personal care, and even grocery, baby and pet products. For nearly 30 years, Iherb has delivered authentic wellness products sourced directly from trusted brands and authorized partners to more than 15 million customers worldwide. And if something doesn't meet your expectations, Iherb Herb makes it right with easy returns and simple refunds. Visit iherb.com and use the code MINDSET for 20% off your order. I love my phone but not my carrier.
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Podcast Producer
What do I do?
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Rob Dial
So I wouldn't have to buy a new phone?
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[01:51]
Rob Dial
Welcome to today's episode of the Mindset Mentor Podcast. I am your host, Rob Dial. If you have not yet done so,
[01:56]
Podcast Producer
hit that subscribe button so you never
[01:58]
Rob Dial
miss another podcast episode.
[02:00]
Podcast Producer
If you're out there and you want
[02:01]
Rob Dial
to create the perfect morning routine, go to theperfectmorningroutine.com right now and get my free workbook and video on exactly the step by step process according to Science
[02:12]
Podcast Producer
of how to create the perfect morning
[02:14]
Rob Dial
routine once again, that is theperfectmorningroutine.com today we're going to be talking about being bored. What if I told you there's a chance that the solution to all of your problems in your life is not about learning more or hustling more or being more Productive, but from actually doing less and embracing boredom. See, boredom isn't just about doing nothing when we're bored. Our brain is deeply, deeply working to make connections, to solve problems, to get creative, and to come up with ideas that could possibly change our lives. The problem is that we have trained ourselves to be so overstimulated that we avoid boredom, the one thing that we actually need. So today I'm gonna break this down for you and show you how to change your life through literally doing nothing. So when we look at the brain, if you've been following me for a while, I say this all the time. Our brains were not meant for this world. Our brains have not changed much over the past 200,000 years. But our environment that we live in as humans has changed drastically. We're not supposed to be inundated with notifications and with emails and with massive to do lists and with media scrolls. We've been built into a world of overstimulation and our poor nervous systems are paying the price of it. Our brains and our nervous systems are designed to be in nature and everything is slow in nature. So if that's the case, why would we want to be bored? If we live in this overstimulated, fast paced world, why would we want to be bored? We have so much to do. Like we need to be productive. Right? Well, you don't want to avoid boredom. I'm going to tell you that I'm going to prove to you today why you don't want to avoid boredom. You want to go as deeply into boredom as you possibly can. Do not turn away from it, embrace it and go deeper into boredom. And the thing about boredom is it actually unlocks parts of your brain neurologically. And this is where it really gets exciting. When you're, quote unquote doing nothing. Your brain isn't just shutting down, it's not shutting down at all. It's actually firing up something that's called the default mode network. And the default mode network is where self reflection, long term planning, and your memory all live. So in other words, it's kind of the place where all of your wisdom is stitched together. So doing nothing gives your brain the perfect environment for the most creative breakthroughs that you can have. Now when you look at the feeling of being bored, when you sit down and you're like, I'm gonna do nothing, or you think that you're gonna meditate and you start getting very agitated, boredom itself is a signal. It's a signal that you cannot sit without stimulation. I saw a Video of a guy a couple weeks ago. There's an experiment that he did, and he tried to not have his phone for seven days. And then he went out with his family, and they were just vlogging the whole thing. And about two hours later, he was gnawing on a water bottle, and he was fidgeting. They were out for dinner, and there was a paper cloth, like, in front of him, and he was ripping the paper cloth. So many people get so bored and get so fidgety and do stuff like him or gnawing on a water bottle. Because your brain is addicted to stimulation. You have been overdosing on stimulation, and the silence is your just moment where your brain can start to flush all of that addiction out of your system. When you look at someone who's addicted to a drug, how do you get an addict off of a drug? Well, you could either go cold turkey or you could wean them off of it. But what you have to do is remove the addiction, not try to continue the addiction or to justify the addiction. Like people like to say, oh, I just can't be bored. I'm the type of person who always has to be doing something right. That's justifying the addiction. So that restlessness that you feel when you first get quiet, that's withdrawal. That's actual and addictive withdrawal. And so your brain has been conditioned to expect constant novelty. And when you start to pull away from always being, seeing novel things and watching videos and being stimulated, it really feels uncomfortable to us. But beneath that discomfort, your neural networks in your brain are detoxing and rebalancing. So instead of calling it boredom, what I recommend that you start thinking of it as. Start to think of it as relaxation. You are actually training your brain to relax. If you're someone who's very anxious or someone who has depressive tendencies or any of that stuff. When you're bored and you're just allowing yourself to be bored and think of it as relaxing, you're training your brain to relax versus training your brain to be go, go, go, like a monkey mind. The silence is actually restorative. And research actually shows that even just two minutes of silence, just complete silence, is more calming to your nervous system than listening to relaxing music. It's the silence lowers your heart rate, it stabilizes your blood pressure, and it lets your brain reorganize itself. And what's really interesting is this right here, okay? When you allow yourself to rest and do nothing, not fall asleep, just rest and do nothing. There's been f. MRI studies and, and electrophysiology studies that show that after learning something new or going and doing something, your hippocampus will replay those neural patterns during quiet wakeful rest. And so what is happening is your, your brain kind of calms down for a second, your nervous system kind of calms down for a second, and boom, your hippocampus comes on and says, okay, it's time to start filing all of this away. Essentially, it's strengthening the connections with the cortex, filing away the memory of what just happened, which gives yourself more mental space after your rest. And it's the exact same mechanism that's used during sleep. So just as sleep is so essential for us and good for our brain, so is rest. And so the consolidation really boosts what mental bandwidth we have after the rest. And so one of the real reasons why the quiet scares us is this. Let's be completely real. A lot of us are scared of sitting down and being quiet. For me, years I was running from being quiet. I had to work 110 hours a week because I was just running from so many things. Most people don't avoid boredom because it's boring. They avoid it because of what surfaces in that space. The stillness that you sit in has a way of pulling up things that you've stuffed away. And we will be right back.
[08:47]
Podcast Producer
Support for today's episode comes from Square and they've got big news. During Square's bi annual releases event, they launched a wave of innovative new tools to help local businesses run faster, smarter and more profitably. Like Square AI, which brings all your business data to your fingertips for deeper insights and faster decisions. Right from the Square dashboard and Dashboard app. From AI that answers your toughest business questions to tech that simplifies food orders and tracks every dollar. It's all live and it's built for businesses like your. Whether you're starting fresh or scaling fast, Square helps you keep up and get ahead. Square launched its most powerful tools yet, designed to give local businesses a competitive edge without the complexity. If you're ready to sell smarter, run faster and stress less. Right now you can get up to $200 off Square Hardware at square.com go mindsetmentor. That's S Q U-A-R-E.com go mindsetmentor. Run your business smarter with Square. Get started today. The first few weeks of school are the best time to catch up on last year's skills. IXL pinpoints exactly what each child needs to review before gaps snowball. IXL is an award winning online learning platform that helps kids truly understand what they're learning, whether they're building math confidence, strengthening reading and writing skills, or reviewing science concepts. IXL is used in 96 of the top 100 school districts in the US and studies show kids who use IXL score higher on tests proven in all 50 states. Learning from home has been so such a great way to build confidence and practice new skills at our own pace. It's helped make learning feel fun while creating a simple routine we can stick with every day. Make an impact on your child's learning. Get IXL now and the Mindset Mentor listeners can get an exclusive 20% off IXL membership when they sign up today at ixl.com mindsetmentor Visit ixl.com mindsetmentOr to get the most effective learning program out there at the best price. If you've been waiting for the right moment to launch your business, there's never been a better time. And Shopify makes it easier than ever to make it happen. Shopify handles everything your business needs from setup and checkout so you have more time to focus on growing your business. Everything you need to start selling is included and ready from day one, including the moment your first customer is ready to pay. Shopify checkout helps more of them finish their purchase, and when they come back, their details are already saved. One tap and they're done. Shopify powers millions of businesses worldwide, from household names like Mattel and Gymshark to small businesses just getting started. I want more more time to focus on growing my business instead of getting stuck managing everything behind the scenes. That's what I love about Shopify. It handles the hard part so I can spend more time doing what actually matters. Shopify is where you go to start your business with everything you need already there from day one. With Shopify, nothing stands between your idea and a real business. So go make it one. Start your free trial at shopify.com dial start your free trial at shopify dot com dial and now back to the
[11:40]
Rob Dial
show your grief, your sadness, your things that you haven't allowed yourself to process, the truths that you've ignored in your life, the deep unsatisfaction you have with where you currently are, the hard conversations that you've been afraid to have. In one study, people were given the option to sit in silence for just 15 minutes or give themselves an electric shock and get out of sitting in silence for 15 minutes. And 71% of men and 26% of women chose to shock themselves instead of actually just sitting in silence for a Minute, there's a quote that I love that correlates with this and it says all of man's problems stem from his inability to sit quietly in a room alone. And so that's how uncomfortable we are with our own selves. But the paradox is those whispers that you're running from, those moments of silence where you start to think about where your life currently is. You start to think about the things in your life that need to change. The stuff that you're running from. That is the exact guidance system that you need to make a change in your life. So your subconscious just finally is like, oh my God, I get a second. It finally has a chance to just speak up because it's not being drowned in all of the noise. And a lot of people are running from that. Now. If you're out there and you're a parent, this is especially true for you and your kids. This is really, really important. So many parents are just trying to keep their children quiet at every moment with screens and activities and new toys and turning on some crazy overstimulating thing on YouTube for them to watch. When you do that, you actually train your child to be more anxious because they can't learn to sit and be bored. They can't learn to sit in silence. And you rob your child of some of the most essential brain building experiences when they sit quietly. It helps them with their executive functioning. Kids with less structured time in not having to be doing things all of the time actually develop stronger self directive skills and the better, better ability to actually set goals and guide themselves. Another thing that boredom is really, really important for, for children is creativity. When children are bored and they have nothing to do and they have one toy that's sitting out, that's when they get to be able to play freely and they're able to start being more creative with what's going on. And they are able to take this little toy, a spoon, and turn it into a princess on a rocket ship. And you know that creativity is really important for them in childhood and all the neural connections that are being created, but it's also really important for them to have that creativity in childhood so that they can also be a creative adult. And the other thing that's really important for a child is emotional resilience. Boredom teaches children how to tolerate frustration, how to regulate their feelings, and how to find joy in just sitting and not having to do something. And so I want you to really just think about this. If you think about if I'm needing to keep my kid busy all of the time. All of the time. All of the. For whatever reason, because I want to, or because they're bothering me or because I've got to be productive or something to do? What am I training them to be as an adult? Am I training them to be a child that grows up and turns into an adult that has adhd? Or someone who ends up having overstimulation problems or anxiety problems? And so you don't need to give them the newest toy. What you need to do is protect empty space for them. You know, when they're that like, I'm bored wine. And they're like, I just want to do something to do, that's the moment just before their imagination switches on. And so try to protect that silence and that boredom for your children. Now, for you, the thing that's really important about silence is where. That's where your wisdom actually lives as well. When you allow yourself to sit in silence, as I said, your brain's default mode, network, switches on. That's the network that gathers all of your past experiences and your memories and starts connecting them to future possibilities. Parts of your brains that have never connected before starting to connect. And it fuses your past experiences and your future possibilities into something new. Out of quiet comes your wisdom because you suddenly start to see patterns and lessons in your life that you were just too busy to catch before. And so out of that silence also comes your creativity, because your mind starts connecting dots in new and fresh ways. And out of that quiet comes ideas for you in your life, the type of ideas that can change the entire course of your life. So silence isn't just like empty time. It's a incubator for the breakthroughs that you've been waiting for in your life. The ideas, the creative moments in your life that you've been waiting for. Me, personally, I believe that. That every person has within them all of the answers that they need in their life. I don't think you need anybody in this world. You don't need anybody to teach you anything. You don't need me to teach you anything. All of your answers lie in your silence. For those of you guys that are spiritual, I also believe that the universe or God or life speaks to you in those silent moments. It's that little whisper that comes in and says, hey, what if you tried this? Hey, you should follow this thing. That's where your intuition lives. And so when you look at it, I've hopefully sold you on the fact of why you should be bored. But how do we actually put this into Practice, let's create like a boredom practice, right? Let's take 14 days and just try this experiment out. Try to have like, one of the most important ways of doing this is to have very solid boundaries on no phone times. Don't just like, put your phone face down, put it in another room, and it can be like, from 6pm to 9pm, I am not on my phone. Maybe from the moment that you wake up until 10am, you're not on your phone. Find your no phone times and be very, very diligent about that. Try to find one day a week where you just don't have your phone at all. Okay? So that's one thing. Have no phone times blocked in your schedule. The second thing is to try to have what I call boredom blocks in your schedule. Try it for twice a day. Start with just 10 minutes. No screens, no stimulation, no. No music, no podcasts, nothing. You just sit down, you set a timer for 10 minutes, and you just breathe. And you notice the sky, and you notice the leaves, and you notice the way that the sun feels on your skin. And you just allow your brain just to rest for a second. And you allow your hippocampus to kind of clean up your desk in your brain and just start to file things away. Another thing I would recommend is to try to find moments of micro silence. You know, if you go from one meeting, the meeting ends at 10:55, and you've got another meeting at 11:00', clock, give yourself 2 minutes, 3 minutes, run to the bathroom real quick, come back, give yourself 2 minutes, 3 minutes, 5 minutes, just close your eyes, just breathe. Just listen to the sound of the air going in and out of your nose, and just allow your brain to just rest for a minute. And then the last thing that I recommend is try to go on more walks. Go outside without headphones, without your phone, by yourself, and just let your mind drift. And if you have children, let your children be bored. Give them one toy instead of 45 toys. They've actually found that children will play longer with one toy than if there's 20 toys sitting out in front of them. And so if your child comes up to you like, mom, I'm bored, say something like, perfect, your brain's about to make something awesome. Let's see what it does. And just allow them to start being more creative. And what you'll notice if you start doing this is you'll notice more original ideas. You'll start to have deeper focus when you return to work. You'll have a clearer sense of what actually matters. And then for your kids who can be bored, they're going to melt down less because they're actually going to become more self resilient. And so here's my challenge to you. Stop treating silence like it's something to avoid or some void that needs to be filled. Boredom isn't your enemy. Start treating it like it's this temple where you're just going to go in and you're going to learn about yourself and about life and come up with ideas. Because your boredom isn't wasted time. It's the place where your subconscious whispers whispers to you. It's a place where you allow creativity to grow. It's a place where you're able to access the wisest parts of yourself. And in a world that's getting louder and louder and busier day by day, the real rebellion might be just sitting in quiet. So that's what I got for you for today's episode. If you love this episode, please share it on Instagram. Stories Tag me obdialjr. R O B D I A L J R and once again, if you want to download my free workbook and video on how to create the perfect morning routine based in science, go to the perfect morningroutine.com right now and download it for free. And with that, I am going to leave you the same way. Leave you every single episode. Make it your mission to make somebody else's day better. I appreciate you and I hope that you have an amazing day.
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Summary6 min read

The Mindset Mentor – "We Were Wrong About Being Bored"

Host: Rob Dial
Date: August 10, 2026

Episode Overview

In this episode of The Mindset Mentor, Rob Dial challenges the modern aversion to boredom, revealing it as a surprisingly vital ingredient for creativity, self-understanding, and emotional resilience. Rob explores the neuroscience behind "doing nothing," outlines the personal and societal costs of overstimulation, and offers practical steps to reclaim the restorative power of boredom for both adults and children. The tone is candid, encouraging, and laced with Rob's signature blend of science-backed advice and relatable storytelling.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Why Embracing Boredom Matters

Main Idea: Boredom isn't just idle time; it's a powerful state where the brain can solve problems, unlock creativity, and heal.
"What if I told you there's a chance that the solution to all of your problems in your life is not about learning more or hustling more or being more productive, but from actually doing less and embracing boredom?" (03:13 – Rob Dial)
Modern life bombards us with constant stimulation—media, notifications, endless to-dos—leaving our ancient brains overwhelmed.
Our brains and nervous systems were designed for the slow pace of nature, not today's rapid-fire environment.

2. The Brain on Boredom: The Default Mode Network

Neurologically, "boredom" activates the default mode network—the part of the brain responsible for self-reflection, long-term planning, and memory consolidation.
"When you’re, quote-unquote, doing nothing... your brain isn’t just shutting down... it’s actually firing up something that’s called the default mode network. And the default mode network is where self-reflection, long-term planning, and your memory all live." (04:05 – Rob Dial)
This is the mental "workspace" for original ideas and meaningful self-discoveries.

3. The Addiction to Stimulation

Most people can't tolerate being bored because their brains have become addicted to novelty and stimulation.
Story: A man tried to spend seven days without his phone and quickly grew agitated and fidgety—an example of "withdrawal" from stimulation (05:16).
"That restlessness... when you first get quiet, that's withdrawal. That's actual and addictive withdrawal." (06:03 – Rob Dial)
The discomfort we feel when bored is our neural circuits detoxing and rebalancing.

4. Reframing Boredom as Relaxation

Instead of labeling it as "boredom," Rob suggests thinking of it as relaxation or mental restoration, crucial for those with anxiety or depression.
"You are actually training your brain to relax." (06:44 – Rob Dial)
Even two minutes of silence can calm the nervous system more effectively than relaxing music (07:10).

5. Science: Memory, Learning, and Silence

After learning something new, the hippocampus "replays" new information during quiet rest, reinforcing learning—akin to the processes happening during sleep.
"Essentially it’s strengthening the connections with the cortex, filing away the memory of what just happened, which gives yourself more mental space after your rest." (07:54 – Rob Dial)
Mental rest boosts bandwidth and focus.

6. Facing the Real Fear of Boredom

Boredom brings up what we’ve suppressed—grief, sadness, ignored truths, dissatisfaction.
"Most people don’t avoid boredom because it’s boring. They avoid it because of what surfaces in that space." (11:40 – Rob Dial)
Notable statistic: In a study, given the choice to sit in silence for 15 minutes or self-administer an electric shock, 71% of men and 26% of women chose the shock (12:13).

Memorable quote:
- "All of man’s problems stem from his inability to sit quietly in a room alone." (12:24 – Rob Dial citing Blaise Pascal)

7. Boredom’s Importance for Children

Over-scheduling kids with screens and activities robs them of key brain-building experiences.
"When you do that, you actually train your child to be more anxious because they can't learn to sit and be bored. They can't learn to sit in silence. And you rob your child of some of the most essential brain building experiences when they sit quietly." (13:07 – Rob Dial)
Boredom improves children’s executive functioning, creativity (e.g., turning a spoon into a rocket ship), and emotional resilience.

8. Silence as a Gateway to Wisdom and Creativity

In quiet, your default mode network fuses past and possible futures, sparking new insights and creativity.
"Out of quiet comes your wisdom because you suddenly start to see patterns and lessons in your life that you were just too busy to catch before." (16:28 – Rob Dial)
Rob believes all answers lie within:
"All of your answers lie in your silence... for those of you that are spiritual, I also believe that the universe or God or life speaks to you in those silent moments." (17:08)

Actionable Tips & Boredom Practice (18:10–20:45)

Rob’s 14-Day Boredom Challenge:

No-Phone Times:
- Block daily periods where the phone is in another room (e.g., 6pm–9pm, morning hours).
Boredom Blocks:
- Schedule two 10-minute sessions daily with no screens, music, or stimulation. Just sit, breathe, and notice your surroundings.
Micro-Silence Moments:
- Between tasks, give yourself 2–5 minutes—just breathe, sit quietly before jumping to the next thing.
Walks Without Devices:
- Go for walks (alone, no headphones, no phone) so your mind can wander.
Support Kids’ Boredom:
- Limit toys given at a time; if your child complains of being bored, respond with: "Perfect, your brain’s about to make something awesome. Let’s see what it does."

Expected Benefits

Increased originality and deeper focus
Greater clarity on what actually matters
Kids learn to be more resilient and less prone to meltdowns

Notable Quotes & Moments

On the risk of over-stimulation:
"Our brains were not meant for this world. Our brains have not changed much over the past 200,000 years. But our environment that we live in as humans has changed drastically." (03:36 – Rob Dial)
On boredom as a creative incubator:
"Silence isn’t just like empty time. It’s a incubator for the breakthroughs that you’ve been waiting for." (16:56 – Rob Dial)
On handling kids’ boredom:
"If your child comes up to you like, 'Mom, I’m bored,' say something like, 'Perfect, your brain’s about to make something awesome.'" (20:07 – Rob Dial)
The ultimate call to action:
"Stop treating silence like it’s something to avoid or some void that needs to be filled... In a world that’s getting louder and louder and busier day by day, the real rebellion might be just sitting in quiet." (20:15 – Rob Dial)

Important Timestamps

03:13 – Introduction of the boredom concept
04:05 – Explanation of the default mode network
05:16 – Story illustrating addiction to stimulation
06:44 – Reframing boredom as relaxation
07:54 – Scientific explanation—hippocampus and memory
11:40 – Surfacing of suppressed emotions in boredom
12:13 – Electric shock vs. silence study
13:07 – Impact of boredom on children
16:28 – Silence as wisdom and creativity
18:10 – Rob’s actionable boredom challenge and practice
20:07 – Parenting advice on supporting kids’ boredom
20:15 – Summary and final call to action

Summary

Rob Dial redefines boredom from being an enemy to a powerful ally for personal growth, learning, and resilience. By understanding the neuroscience of rest and confronting our discomfort with stillness, we open the door to creativity, wisdom, and even happiness. The episode provides insightful science, practical family and personal strategies, and motivational encouragement to make space for boredom in a world of constant noise.

Key Takeaway:
The real rebellion is to find and protect moments of quiet—boredom is where your greatest ideas, healing, and clarity are born.

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Transcript20 lines

[00:00]
Rob Dial
Hey, a bad hire can really cost your business, and a great hire can really accelerate your business. Running a small business means every hire really matters. A bad hire can cost you time and money and momentum, and a good hire can help grow your business immensely. Finding great talent isn't easy when you don't have the time or resources to sift through resumes. LinkedIn's new hiring pro screens candidates for you, so instead of sorting through applicants, you can spend time talking to only the right ones. Get started by posting your job for free@LinkedIn.com dial terms and conditions apply. When it comes to health and wellness, the most important thing for me is to be able to trust what I put in my body. So whether you are tackling fitness goals, a wellness routine, or shopping for family essentials, Iherb is the one stop shop for vitamins, supplements, sports nutrition, personal care, and even grocery, baby and pet products. For nearly 30 years, Iherb has delivered authentic wellness products sourced directly from trusted brands and authorized partners to more than 15 million customers worldwide. And if something doesn't meet your expectations, Iherb Herb makes it right with easy returns and simple refunds. Visit iherb.com and use the code MINDSET for 20% off your order. I love my phone but not my carrier.
[01:16]
Podcast Producer
What do I do?
[01:17]
Commercial Voice Actor
Well, there are 250 reasons to join T Mobile. Like what? You can keep your phone and your number and T Mobile helps pay it off up to $800 per line.
[01:25]
Rob Dial
So I wouldn't have to buy a new phone?
[01:26]
Commercial Voice Actor
Yep. Plus your plan price stays the same for 5 years on experience plans.
[01:31]
Nice.
[01:31]
Find your reason@t mobile.via virtual prepaid guard
[01:36]
Podcast Producer
card typically takes 15 days after rebate submission price guarantee on talk, text and 5G data exclusions like taxes and fees apply.
[01:51]
Rob Dial
Welcome to today's episode of the Mindset Mentor Podcast. I am your host, Rob Dial. If you have not yet done so,
[01:56]
Podcast Producer
hit that subscribe button so you never
[01:58]
Rob Dial
miss another podcast episode.
[02:00]
Podcast Producer
If you're out there and you want
[02:01]
Rob Dial
to create the perfect morning routine, go to theperfectmorningroutine.com right now and get my free workbook and video on exactly the step by step process according to Science
[02:12]
Podcast Producer
of how to create the perfect morning
[02:14]
Rob Dial
routine once again, that is theperfectmorningroutine.com today we're going to be talking about being bored. What if I told you there's a chance that the solution to all of your problems in your life is not about learning more or hustling more or being more Productive, but from actually doing less and embracing boredom. See, boredom isn't just about doing nothing when we're bored. Our brain is deeply, deeply working to make connections, to solve problems, to get creative, and to come up with ideas that could possibly change our lives. The problem is that we have trained ourselves to be so overstimulated that we avoid boredom, the one thing that we actually need. So today I'm gonna break this down for you and show you how to change your life through literally doing nothing. So when we look at the brain, if you've been following me for a while, I say this all the time. Our brains were not meant for this world. Our brains have not changed much over the past 200,000 years. But our environment that we live in as humans has changed drastically. We're not supposed to be inundated with notifications and with emails and with massive to do lists and with media scrolls. We've been built into a world of overstimulation and our poor nervous systems are paying the price of it. Our brains and our nervous systems are designed to be in nature and everything is slow in nature. So if that's the case, why would we want to be bored? If we live in this overstimulated, fast paced world, why would we want to be bored? We have so much to do. Like we need to be productive. Right? Well, you don't want to avoid boredom. I'm going to tell you that I'm going to prove to you today why you don't want to avoid boredom. You want to go as deeply into boredom as you possibly can. Do not turn away from it, embrace it and go deeper into boredom. And the thing about boredom is it actually unlocks parts of your brain neurologically. And this is where it really gets exciting. When you're, quote unquote doing nothing. Your brain isn't just shutting down, it's not shutting down at all. It's actually firing up something that's called the default mode network. And the default mode network is where self reflection, long term planning, and your memory all live. So in other words, it's kind of the place where all of your wisdom is stitched together. So doing nothing gives your brain the perfect environment for the most creative breakthroughs that you can have. Now when you look at the feeling of being bored, when you sit down and you're like, I'm gonna do nothing, or you think that you're gonna meditate and you start getting very agitated, boredom itself is a signal. It's a signal that you cannot sit without stimulation. I saw a Video of a guy a couple weeks ago. There's an experiment that he did, and he tried to not have his phone for seven days. And then he went out with his family, and they were just vlogging the whole thing. And about two hours later, he was gnawing on a water bottle, and he was fidgeting. They were out for dinner, and there was a paper cloth, like, in front of him, and he was ripping the paper cloth. So many people get so bored and get so fidgety and do stuff like him or gnawing on a water bottle. Because your brain is addicted to stimulation. You have been overdosing on stimulation, and the silence is your just moment where your brain can start to flush all of that addiction out of your system. When you look at someone who's addicted to a drug, how do you get an addict off of a drug? Well, you could either go cold turkey or you could wean them off of it. But what you have to do is remove the addiction, not try to continue the addiction or to justify the addiction. Like people like to say, oh, I just can't be bored. I'm the type of person who always has to be doing something right. That's justifying the addiction. So that restlessness that you feel when you first get quiet, that's withdrawal. That's actual and addictive withdrawal. And so your brain has been conditioned to expect constant novelty. And when you start to pull away from always being, seeing novel things and watching videos and being stimulated, it really feels uncomfortable to us. But beneath that discomfort, your neural networks in your brain are detoxing and rebalancing. So instead of calling it boredom, what I recommend that you start thinking of it as. Start to think of it as relaxation. You are actually training your brain to relax. If you're someone who's very anxious or someone who has depressive tendencies or any of that stuff. When you're bored and you're just allowing yourself to be bored and think of it as relaxing, you're training your brain to relax versus training your brain to be go, go, go, like a monkey mind. The silence is actually restorative. And research actually shows that even just two minutes of silence, just complete silence, is more calming to your nervous system than listening to relaxing music. It's the silence lowers your heart rate, it stabilizes your blood pressure, and it lets your brain reorganize itself. And what's really interesting is this right here, okay? When you allow yourself to rest and do nothing, not fall asleep, just rest and do nothing. There's been f. MRI studies and, and electrophysiology studies that show that after learning something new or going and doing something, your hippocampus will replay those neural patterns during quiet wakeful rest. And so what is happening is your, your brain kind of calms down for a second, your nervous system kind of calms down for a second, and boom, your hippocampus comes on and says, okay, it's time to start filing all of this away. Essentially, it's strengthening the connections with the cortex, filing away the memory of what just happened, which gives yourself more mental space after your rest. And it's the exact same mechanism that's used during sleep. So just as sleep is so essential for us and good for our brain, so is rest. And so the consolidation really boosts what mental bandwidth we have after the rest. And so one of the real reasons why the quiet scares us is this. Let's be completely real. A lot of us are scared of sitting down and being quiet. For me, years I was running from being quiet. I had to work 110 hours a week because I was just running from so many things. Most people don't avoid boredom because it's boring. They avoid it because of what surfaces in that space. The stillness that you sit in has a way of pulling up things that you've stuffed away. And we will be right back.
[08:47]
Podcast Producer
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[11:40]
Rob Dial
show your grief, your sadness, your things that you haven't allowed yourself to process, the truths that you've ignored in your life, the deep unsatisfaction you have with where you currently are, the hard conversations that you've been afraid to have. In one study, people were given the option to sit in silence for just 15 minutes or give themselves an electric shock and get out of sitting in silence for 15 minutes. And 71% of men and 26% of women chose to shock themselves instead of actually just sitting in silence for a Minute, there's a quote that I love that correlates with this and it says all of man's problems stem from his inability to sit quietly in a room alone. And so that's how uncomfortable we are with our own selves. But the paradox is those whispers that you're running from, those moments of silence where you start to think about where your life currently is. You start to think about the things in your life that need to change. The stuff that you're running from. That is the exact guidance system that you need to make a change in your life. So your subconscious just finally is like, oh my God, I get a second. It finally has a chance to just speak up because it's not being drowned in all of the noise. And a lot of people are running from that. Now. If you're out there and you're a parent, this is especially true for you and your kids. This is really, really important. So many parents are just trying to keep their children quiet at every moment with screens and activities and new toys and turning on some crazy overstimulating thing on YouTube for them to watch. When you do that, you actually train your child to be more anxious because they can't learn to sit and be bored. They can't learn to sit in silence. And you rob your child of some of the most essential brain building experiences when they sit quietly. It helps them with their executive functioning. Kids with less structured time in not having to be doing things all of the time actually develop stronger self directive skills and the better, better ability to actually set goals and guide themselves. Another thing that boredom is really, really important for, for children is creativity. When children are bored and they have nothing to do and they have one toy that's sitting out, that's when they get to be able to play freely and they're able to start being more creative with what's going on. And they are able to take this little toy, a spoon, and turn it into a princess on a rocket ship. And you know that creativity is really important for them in childhood and all the neural connections that are being created, but it's also really important for them to have that creativity in childhood so that they can also be a creative adult. And the other thing that's really important for a child is emotional resilience. Boredom teaches children how to tolerate frustration, how to regulate their feelings, and how to find joy in just sitting and not having to do something. And so I want you to really just think about this. If you think about if I'm needing to keep my kid busy all of the time. All of the time. All of the. For whatever reason, because I want to, or because they're bothering me or because I've got to be productive or something to do? What am I training them to be as an adult? Am I training them to be a child that grows up and turns into an adult that has adhd? Or someone who ends up having overstimulation problems or anxiety problems? And so you don't need to give them the newest toy. What you need to do is protect empty space for them. You know, when they're that like, I'm bored wine. And they're like, I just want to do something to do, that's the moment just before their imagination switches on. And so try to protect that silence and that boredom for your children. Now, for you, the thing that's really important about silence is where. That's where your wisdom actually lives as well. When you allow yourself to sit in silence, as I said, your brain's default mode, network, switches on. That's the network that gathers all of your past experiences and your memories and starts connecting them to future possibilities. Parts of your brains that have never connected before starting to connect. And it fuses your past experiences and your future possibilities into something new. Out of quiet comes your wisdom because you suddenly start to see patterns and lessons in your life that you were just too busy to catch before. And so out of that silence also comes your creativity, because your mind starts connecting dots in new and fresh ways. And out of that quiet comes ideas for you in your life, the type of ideas that can change the entire course of your life. So silence isn't just like empty time. It's a incubator for the breakthroughs that you've been waiting for in your life. The ideas, the creative moments in your life that you've been waiting for. Me, personally, I believe that. That every person has within them all of the answers that they need in their life. I don't think you need anybody in this world. You don't need anybody to teach you anything. You don't need me to teach you anything. All of your answers lie in your silence. For those of you guys that are spiritual, I also believe that the universe or God or life speaks to you in those silent moments. It's that little whisper that comes in and says, hey, what if you tried this? Hey, you should follow this thing. That's where your intuition lives. And so when you look at it, I've hopefully sold you on the fact of why you should be bored. But how do we actually put this into Practice, let's create like a boredom practice, right? Let's take 14 days and just try this experiment out. Try to have like, one of the most important ways of doing this is to have very solid boundaries on no phone times. Don't just like, put your phone face down, put it in another room, and it can be like, from 6pm to 9pm, I am not on my phone. Maybe from the moment that you wake up until 10am, you're not on your phone. Find your no phone times and be very, very diligent about that. Try to find one day a week where you just don't have your phone at all. Okay? So that's one thing. Have no phone times blocked in your schedule. The second thing is to try to have what I call boredom blocks in your schedule. Try it for twice a day. Start with just 10 minutes. No screens, no stimulation, no. No music, no podcasts, nothing. You just sit down, you set a timer for 10 minutes, and you just breathe. And you notice the sky, and you notice the leaves, and you notice the way that the sun feels on your skin. And you just allow your brain just to rest for a second. And you allow your hippocampus to kind of clean up your desk in your brain and just start to file things away. Another thing I would recommend is to try to find moments of micro silence. You know, if you go from one meeting, the meeting ends at 10:55, and you've got another meeting at 11:00', clock, give yourself 2 minutes, 3 minutes, run to the bathroom real quick, come back, give yourself 2 minutes, 3 minutes, 5 minutes, just close your eyes, just breathe. Just listen to the sound of the air going in and out of your nose, and just allow your brain to just rest for a minute. And then the last thing that I recommend is try to go on more walks. Go outside without headphones, without your phone, by yourself, and just let your mind drift. And if you have children, let your children be bored. Give them one toy instead of 45 toys. They've actually found that children will play longer with one toy than if there's 20 toys sitting out in front of them. And so if your child comes up to you like, mom, I'm bored, say something like, perfect, your brain's about to make something awesome. Let's see what it does. And just allow them to start being more creative. And what you'll notice if you start doing this is you'll notice more original ideas. You'll start to have deeper focus when you return to work. You'll have a clearer sense of what actually matters. And then for your kids who can be bored, they're going to melt down less because they're actually going to become more self resilient. And so here's my challenge to you. Stop treating silence like it's something to avoid or some void that needs to be filled. Boredom isn't your enemy. Start treating it like it's this temple where you're just going to go in and you're going to learn about yourself and about life and come up with ideas. Because your boredom isn't wasted time. It's the place where your subconscious whispers whispers to you. It's a place where you allow creativity to grow. It's a place where you're able to access the wisest parts of yourself. And in a world that's getting louder and louder and busier day by day, the real rebellion might be just sitting in quiet. So that's what I got for you for today's episode. If you love this episode, please share it on Instagram. Stories Tag me obdialjr. R O B D I A L J R and once again, if you want to download my free workbook and video on how to create the perfect morning routine based in science, go to the perfect morningroutine.com right now and download it for free. And with that, I am going to leave you the same way. Leave you every single episode. Make it your mission to make somebody else's day better. I appreciate you and I hope that you have an amazing day.
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