Podcast Title: The Moth
Episode: Kevin R. Free: My Hero
Release Date: August 5, 2014
Host: Dan Kennedy
Introduction
In this poignant episode of The Moth, actor and arts educator Kevin R. Free shares his deeply personal story titled "My Hero." Told live in New York in 2012 under the theme "Heart of Darkness: Stories of Love and War," Free delves into his childhood memories, a life-altering car accident, and his journey toward healing and self-discovery.
Background and Childhood Memories
Kevin begins by reminiscing about his vibrant childhood in Fort Knox, Kentucky, highlighting the warmth and joy his parents brought into their home. His mother, a spirited and fun-loving woman, often involved him and his brothers in playful activities.
Notable Quote:
"My mom was really kind of crazy and fun. She liked to make up dances. My favorite dance was called the Loose Booty."
[04:15]
He fondly recalls his mother's creative dances, such as the "Loose Booty," and the family's shared love for television, watching shows like Sanford and Son and Chico and the Man. These memories paint a picture of a lively and affectionate household.
The Car Accident
The narrative takes a dramatic turn on Christmas Day in 1975 when Kevin was six years old. While driving from Fort Knox, Kentucky, to Greensboro, North Carolina, to visit his grandparents, the family's car was struck by a drunk driver. The accident resulted in severe injuries: Kevin's father fell unconscious in the driver's seat, and his mother was critically injured and never recovered.
Notable Quotes:
"We screamed, 'We're orphans. We're orphans.'"
[09:30]
"I realized that I wasn't going to save him. I wasn't going to be able to save anybody. I couldn't save my mother because my mother wasn't coming back—dead meant she was gone."
[12:15]
Kevin describes the chaos and fear following the crash, emphasizing his six-year-old perspective where the incident felt surreal and disorienting, much like the dramatic scenes he had seen on television. The aftermath left the family shattered, moving in with his grandparents and grappling with the permanent loss of his mother.
Aftermath and Personal Transformation
In the years following the accident, Kevin struggled with his grief and the desire to prevent others from experiencing similar pain. This manifested in a self-imposed mission to "save" those around him. He adopted behaviors aimed at safeguarding his friends and family, such as abstaining from alcohol and trying to steer others away from harmful choices.
Notable Quotes:
"I wanted to save all of my friends. It had been determined that the guy who hit us on Christmas 1975 was a drunk driver. So I decided I was not going to drink."
[15:20]
However, Kevin's efforts to control and save others often led him into unhealthy relationships and personal turmoil. It wasn't until he confronted his own limitations that he began to understand the necessity of self-care and acceptance of his loss.
Notable Quote:
"I couldn't save my mother because my mother wasn't coming back—dead meant she was gone."
[12:15]
Conclusion and Personal Growth
Ultimately, Kevin comes to a place of self-acceptance, recognizing that his attempts to save others were a way to cope with his unresolved grief. He embraces his own journey, celebrating his birthdays and finding new ways to connect with his past and his family.
Notable Quotes:
"Tonight I would like to change that and toast myself to my family. To where we were, where we are, and where we're going."
[13:35]
"I started drinking. Thank you."
[17:10]
In his closing remarks, Kevin shifts the focus from his mother to himself and his family, highlighting a hopeful outlook for the future. His story is a testament to resilience, the complexities of grief, and the importance of personal healing.
Final Thoughts
Kevin R. Free's "My Hero" is a moving exploration of loss, family, and the journey toward self-acceptance. Through vivid storytelling and emotional honesty, he invites listeners to reflect on their own experiences with tragedy and the paths they take to find strength and meaning in the aftermath.
About Kevin R. Free:
Kevin R. Free is an accomplished actor, singer, and arts educator, currently appearing off-Broadway in The Fantasticks. His voice resonates through over 100 audiobooks and the popular podcast Welcome to Night Vale. Follow him on Twitter or visit kevinarfree.com.
This summary is crafted to provide a comprehensive understanding of Kevin R. Free's "My Hero" episode for those who haven't listened to it, capturing the essence and emotional depth of his story.