Summary of The Moth Podcast Episode: Nicole Kear & Christy Kent Release Date: June 30, 2015

Introduction

In this episode of The Moth, host Dan Kennedy introduces two compelling true stories that delve deep into personal struggles and transformative journeys. The episode features Nicole Carr and Kristy Kent, each sharing their unique experiences that resonate with themes of resilience, identity, and self-acceptance.

Story 1: Navigating Blindness with Nicole Carr

Overview: Nicole Carr’s heartfelt narrative explores her battle with retinitis pigmentosa, a degenerative retinal disease that progressively diminishes her vision. Through her journey, Nicole reveals the emotional and practical challenges of becoming visually impaired, the impact on her personal relationships, and her eventual path toward acceptance and seeking help.

Key Points:

• Initial Denial and Fear: Nicole describes the initial diagnosis and her overwhelming fear of losing her vision completely, fearing societal stigma and personal losses.
• Maintaining a Facade: To avoid pity and maintain her vibrant lifestyle, Nicole concocts elaborate excuses for her frequent accidents, masking her blindness from those around her.
• Impact on Motherhood: As a mother of a young, active child, Nicole faces heightened anxiety and realizes the limitations her blindness imposes on her ability to ensure her daughter’s safety.
• Acceptance and Seeking Help: A near-miss at the playground becomes a turning point, compelling Nicole to confront her fears and accept her condition by reaching out to the New York State Commission for the Blind for mobility training.

Notable Quotes:

• Nicole Carr [05:14]:

  "I have this very distinct feeling that as soon as I do [take out the cane], terrible things will happen. I'm going to lose the rest of my vision, and then I'm going to be divorced and unemployed, and they're going to take my kids away."

• Nicole Carr [12:45]:

  "Sometimes it takes more than a near death experience to stop a lie from growing."

• Nicole Carr [16:50]:

  "I'm a blind woman now, and it's not pretty or glamorous or exciting, but it's what I am. And it feels kind of amazing to admit it."

Insights & Conclusions: Nicole’s story underscores the profound psychological impact of a degenerative illness and the lengths one might go to preserve their perceived identity. Her eventual acceptance highlights the importance of seeking support and embracing vulnerability to foster genuine connections and personal growth.

Story 2: Christy Kent’s Journey with Identity and Pornography

Overview: Kristy Kent, a transgender woman, recounts her early and complex relationship with pornography intertwined with her gender identity exploration. Her story navigates through societal expectations, familial pressures, and the internal conflicts that accompany transitioning from male to female.

Key Points:

• Early Encounters with Pornography: Kristy shares her initial exposure to pornographic material during adolescence, juxtaposing it with her nascent understanding of her transgender identity.
• Family Dynamics: Growing up in a conservative Southern Baptist household, Kristy faced significant challenges discussing and understanding her gender identity, leading to secrecy and internalized struggles.
• Impact on Relationships: Kristy details how pornography affected her romantic relationships, leading to misunderstandings and emotional pain between her and her partners.
• Transition and Self-Acceptance: Ultimately, Kristy embraces her true self, transitioning to female and finding happiness and fulfillment, free from the earlier turmoil.

Notable Quotes:

• Kristy Kent [18:15]:

  "At our house, we don't talk about the birds and the bees unless the birds are doves and the bees are Beatitudes."

• Kristy Kent [21:30]:

  "I haven't been able to share with her yet because I haven't come to terms with it myself that on the inside I don't feel like any other man."

• Kristy Kent [23:00]:

  "I can dream now. These days I have transitioned to be a woman and I am happily remarried to a wonderful man. I don't need pornography anymore."

Insights & Conclusions: Kristy’s narrative sheds light on the intersectionality of sexuality and gender identity, illustrating how external pressures and internal conflicts can complicate personal development. Her transition serves as a testament to the importance of self-acceptance and the liberation that comes from living authentically.

Closing Thoughts

This episode of The Moth masterfully weaves stories of personal adversity and triumph. Nicole Carr and Kristy Kent offer intimate glimpses into their lives, inviting listeners to empathize with their struggles and celebrate their resilience. Their stories not only entertain but also inspire, providing profound lessons on the human spirit’s capacity to overcome and transform.

About the Storytellers:

• Nicole Carr is a writer and the author of the memoir Now I See You, set to release in paperback in July. Her storytelling poignantly captures the essence of living with a visual impairment and the journey toward acceptance.

• Kristy Kent is a writer, storyteller, and math enthusiast residing in the Twin Cities area with her husband, two sons, and her cat. Having transitioned from male to female over a decade ago, Kristy continues to build meaningful relationships, exemplified by her enduring friendship with her ex-wife.

For more stories and information on upcoming events, visit themoth.org.