Steve Zimmer (3:22)

In our section of Niles, Illinois. The backyards all measure exactly 30ft by 40ft, but the Dwyer's backyard is first among equals. It has a pool surrounded by a large wood deck that gets about this high. Sometimes, when the Dwyers have a pool party, I'll sneak through a gap in the fence and crawl undetected underneath the deck and I can look up through slots in the wood and spy on people at the party. By the way, this story does not occur recently. I was 8 years old, but this deck, with its sunny surface and troll infested underworld, kind of sums up our neighborhood, which is in the middle of a crime wave. Six burglaries in the last four months. They begin right after my family moves in. We're innocent, but we can't escape the observation that everything was fine until that weird family showed up. We try to fit in, but it's like as soon as we copy what the neighbors are doing, they immediately stop doing it. And after a couple more burglaries, they start a neighborhood watch. My parents offer to join the watch. The neighbors don't actually say no. Rather, they welcome us on as reserves. We know the Dwyers blocked us. They're the big family in the neighborhood. Very popular, especially their two oldest kids, Tommy, who's 16, and Marianne, who's 15. The Dwyers Live right next door, but they never say hello or invite us to any of their parties, including their upcoming huge Hawaiian luau party that gets half the neighborhood. Nonetheless, I secretly attend this event, crawling underneath the deck as the luau rages above me. Near the center of the party, I hear Mr. Dwyer. He's holding court and he's telling stories and he has everyone laughing about something which turns out to be my parents. I'm not popular in school, but hearing that my parents are unpopular is somehow a lot worse. The following week, big surprise, we have the Zimmer Family barbecue, which features Zimmers, pineapple marinated ham and despair. My parents choose this moment to announce that we're going to do our own Neighborhood Watch, which sounds pathetic, except that I think they're worried about. They just want a way for my little brother and I to cope with these burglaries. I've been having nightmares about the robbers coming into our house. I must be a conservative kid because the robbers are always hippies and you know, they laugh and give us the peace sign as they're shooting us. But my little brother is more deeply affected. He'll get up in the middle of the night and just stare out the window at the street for hours. And he was only four years old. So we start doing this family watch for an hour every night. And it's a great family memory. Just sitting there with my mom or dad looking out the window and having their undivided attention. My parents fight a lot. They're even unpopular with each other. But this one time they stop. It's the closest I'll ever be to my family and the most hopeful about how things will turn out for us. Because I've been convinced that something horrible is going to happen. Two months later the end of summer. It's a very warm night, which means two things. I'm wearing my bright orange summer pajamas and the windows open around 2am Something brushes against my leg. I pretend like I'm still asleep. There's whispers and warm breath near my face. Then someone grabs my arm. It's my little brother who I share the bedroom with. I'm like, what? He says, the Dwyers are getting robbed. So we go and look out the window and sure enough, their house is dark except for a light on in the basement and there's no cars in the driveway. So we go and wake up and tell our mom and she calls the police and wakes up my dad. And in that order. This is our big chance. We're going to save the Dwyers. The police show up several squad cars, lights, sirens, and they pull five very sketchy looking teenage guys out of the Dwyer basement, along with Tommy and Marianne Dwyer. By now, half the neighborhood's out walking their dog, even if they don't have a dog. And people are coming up to us on the lawn. They're like, what's going on? You know those other kids? Why are the police questioning, questioning them? Are they criminals? Nobody knows. Those five kids aren't from around the neighborhood, which is really weird because Tommy and Marianne are, you know, know everyone in the neighborhood. They probably. They've practically been in every house in the block. They've been in every house on the block. There's no arrests, but the Neighborhood Watch turns into Watch. The Dwyers and the burglaries stop cold. That night changes everything. The Dwyers eventually move away in disgrace. The neighborhood is safe, and we're no longer the weird family. We're the weird family you don't fuck with. Thank you.

Dan Kennedy (9:30)

Steve Zimmer began attending the moth in 2004 and telling stories in 2006. He's won 12 moth slams, including a grand slam back in 2009. The story you're about to hear by Sarah Peters was recorded live at the Moth Grand Slam in July 2010. The theme of that night was Point of no Return.

Sarah Peters (9:58)

Link is holding aloft the Ocarina of Time when it happens, and I am transfixed because it's 1999, and the legend of the Ocarina of Time is the greatest video game ever. Ever. It's visually stunning and has this gorgeous, stirring storyline. So I'm sitting on my bed, enchanted, when I'm bleeding, but more accurately, I have bled in a fraction of a second. I have bled through my panties, through my jeans, through the quilt, through the sheet and onto the mattress. And I stumble to the bathroom to assess the situation. And I see that what has just come out of my body is not red like blood. It's black like death. And I have no idea what's happening to me. I call my boyfriend. He says, we're going to the health center. They run a bunch of tests on me and tell me to come back the next day for the results. So the next day, I'm sitting in the doctor's office there, thinking, please, God, don't let me have an std. Don't let me be pregnant. Just let it be cancer. Please, God, give me cancer. And the doctor comes in and very kindly says, well, Sarah, you're perfectly healthy, but your pregnancy test was positive. Tears. Immediately, I am in tears. And a word appears in my head. Abortion. I have always been pro choice, but I had never thought that would be my choice. And yet there it is, the very first thing that springs to stark all caps. I cry harder. And somewhere in the background, I hear the doctor saying that the pregnancy test measures hormone levels, but based on what I experienced, they think I might have had a miscarriage. And. And we'd have to have an ultrasound to be certain. So I wipe my eyes, I schedule the appointment, and I prepare for the ultrasound, which means that I have to consume some absurd quantity of water so that by the time the appointment comes, I have to pee bad. I am squirming in my seat, like in intense pain. I'm thinking, oh my God, I'm going to pee all over the floor. And finally they call me in to the ultrasound room. And I am thinking I'm expecting the smiling nurse rubbing something on my belly. And we look at the baby in the screen. But no, it is nothing like that. I am in a dark room on a metal table with a very angry looking woman with a giant wand. And without any warning whatsoever, she just sticks it inside me and starts poking around like she's having a fucking fencing match inside my uterus. And I'm like, lady, if you were not careful, I'm going to piss all over your face. She does not respond to that. She doesn't show me anything. She doesn't tell me anything. She does not say a word. She just takes off her gloves and walks out the door. I was already scared, but now I feel violated and dirty. So I slink out of the room key, which is glorious, and begin the wait. Because. Because it is now Friday and we won't have results until Monday. All weekend, I find myself talking to her. I don't know why I say her, I just. I know it's a girl. I know her name. I know her face. I know she will disappoint me by becoming a cheerleader in high school. I read books to her. I point out pretty flowers to her. And I tell her, baby, you don't want us as your parents. We're not ready. We're not ready for you. And I try to explain it to her so that she'll forgive me. Monday comes back. In the health center. My boyfriend and I are holding hands, looking at each other with so much love and so much fear. They call my name up, and the loudest woman in America announces to the entire waiting room, Sam Peters. After Sam results. Nope, no baby in there. Must have been a miscarriage. All right, honey, have a good day. We're like, okay, let's get the hell out of here. We get out into the sunshine and relief. There's definitely relief, because we're off the hook. We don't have to make that choice. Between confess to our families how irresponsible we've been, change our lives forever, or do this one gruesome, selfish, irreversible thing. And I feel guilt because I already knew what that choice would have been. And also for me, loss. Because all those things I'd said to her over the past few days, she'd never heard them because she wasn't there. But in the crushing depression that follows, I cling to and complete the legend of the ocarina of time and I weep. I weep partially because it really was an amazing game, but partially, I think, because I still just really need to cry. Thank you.

Dan Kennedy (15:38)

Sarah Peters lives in New York City with her husband, Peter Aguero. As yet, they have no children. Sarah writes about surviving unemployment with hope and humor on her blog Happy in Hooverville, and she still thinks Ocarina of Time is the best video game ever. This this episode of the Moth and the special insider survey for our podcast are both brought to you by the new 2011 Hyundai Equus. Please go to podcastinsidersurvey.com Tell us what you think and we're going to let you know what other listeners of the podcast said in an upcoming podcast episode. And while you're there, be sure to check out the new 2011 Hyundai Equus, including heated and cooled seats, seats complete with driver, back massage, discover a new kind of luxury, and the special survey for our podcast, all brought to you by the new 2011 Hyundai Equus at podcastinsidersurvey.com that's podcastinsidersurvey.com I'm Jay Allison, back.

Jay Allison (16:40)

As promised to tell you that we're looking for you to pitch us your stories for the Moth Radio Hour. The new season has lots of your pitches embedded right in the radio show and they're great. We're going to have a vote and invite the winner to tell a story on stage. You can find out all about it@themost.org and you can find out when your public radio station is airing the show by asking them. The radio series is produced by the Moth and me, Jay Allison at Atlantic Public Media up here on Cape Cod and distributed by the public radio exchange.

Intuit Sponsor (17:11)

Prx.Org Our podcast host Dan Kennedy is.

Dan Kennedy (17:15)

The author of the book Rock An Office Power Ballad.

Intuit Sponsor (17:18)

Learn more@rockonthebook.com thanks to all of you.

Dan Kennedy (17:22)

For listening and we hope you have a story worthy week. Podcast audio production by Paul Ruest at the Argo Studios in New York Podcast hosting by PRX Public Radio Exchange helping make public radio more public@prx.org.