290. From Me to You: Pep Talk - The MSing Link

Summary5 min read

The MSing Link – Episode 290: From Me to You: Pep Talk
Host: Dr. Gretchen Hawley, PT, DPT, MSCS
Date: June 24, 2026

Episode Overview

This special solo episode features Dr. Gretchen Hawley delivering a heartfelt pep talk directly to listeners living with Multiple Sclerosis (MS). Focusing on the barriers to consistent exercise—especially the power of negative self-talk—Dr. Hawley encourages listeners to shift their mindset and take active, positive steps toward their mobility, strength, and wellness goals. The episode is a motivational guide to help listeners recognize unhelpful thought patterns, develop a sustainable exercise plan, and cultivate more supportive habits around exercise.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. The Reality of Self-Talk for People with MS

The Impact of Thoughts on Action
- Dr. Hawley acknowledges that many people with MS struggle to exercise consistently—not due to lack of knowledge, but because of negative self-talk and emotional barriers.
- "The way that we talk to ourselves matters, especially when it comes down to exercising and working towards our goals when you have MS.” (02:24)
Common External Influences
- She highlights how past medical advice (“you won’t get stronger with MS” or “you’ll need a wheelchair”) can solidify a sense of hopelessness and prevent people from committing to exercise.
- “So maybe you had some external perspectives like that at some point in your life, or also maybe you’ve noticed a regression or a symptom flare… So there’s many reasons that it’s normal to feel negatively about exercise.” (04:08)

2. Unique Journey for Each Person with MS

MS Outcomes Are Not Universal
- Dr. Hawley stresses the individuality of MS: no doctor can predict any single person’s outcome, and everyone’s experience is unique.
- “MS is so different for each person that has it... It is impossible for any doctor, no matter how much experience they have, to say, ‘oh, you have MS—this will be your outcome.’” (05:28)

3. Identifying Negative Self-Talk

Before Exercise: Doubt and Sabotage
- Dr. Hawley shares candid examples from her clients, highlighting thoughts that undermine motivation even before starting exercise:
  - “Will this really help me?”
  - “Is this really what I need to be doing?”
  - “I used to do so much more. This won’t be helpful. Is this really enough?” (07:08)
During Exercise: Self-Criticism
- More negative self-talk emerges during exercise, such as:
  - “This isn’t doing anything.”
  - “That was terrible.”
  - “I can’t believe you can only do this.”
  - “I’m not being consistent. I’m not working hard enough.” (08:17)
The Consequences
- Dr. Hawley explains that these kinds of thoughts link negative feelings to the act of exercising, reinforcing avoidance and negative patterns.
- “You are pairing a negative emotion…along with exercise. So you truly are telling your brain that you want those two to be associated.” (09:39)

4. Breaking the Pattern: Three Practical Steps

Step 1: Have a Specific Plan
- Identify one or two concrete, functional goals (e.g., improving walking quality, stair climbing, getting in/out of bed).
- “Prioritize which goals you're actually going to be working towards and then have an exercise program that aligns with that.” (11:02)
Step 2: Get or Design an Aligned Exercise Program
- Use past physical therapy plans, consult an MS-specific or neuro-specialist PT, or reach out for remote support (e.g., Dr. Hawley’s resources).
- “If you know how to do that yourself, amazing… If not, seek out guidance from someone who is knowledgeable.” (12:10)
Step 3: Believe in the Plan
- Cultivate confidence in your plan and allow time to see improvements, understanding that progress is gradual, especially with MS.
- “Feel confident in that plan and give it time. Of course, no one ever sees results right away, especially when MS is involved.” (13:06)

5. Rewriting Self-Talk: Positive Affirmations and Mindset Shifts

Replacing Negativity with Supportive Phrases
- Dr. Hawley provides alternative thoughts to use during exercise:
  - “I am doing exactly what I should be doing to reach my goals.”
  - “This is enough to help me reach my goals.”
  - “This is perfect for me right now.”
  - “I’m supposed to take rest breaks. Resting is a good thing.” (14:34)
- These mantras are not about denying challenges, but reframing them to create positive associations and better long-term habits.
- “We’re just changing our mindset around that thought, to make it more positive so that actions follow.” (16:00)
Personalization is Key
- Listeners are encouraged to use phrases that genuinely resonate—or create their own.
- “It can be anything. But it should feel good to you. It should motivate you.” (17:09)

6. Building the Habit – Awareness and Practice

Acknowledge the Challenge
- Changing self-talk is not easy and takes repetition, but writing down and reminding oneself of positive affirmations before each exercise session can help form new mental habits.
- “Anytime before you exercise, remind yourself of this because those negative thoughts are going to want to creep in.” (16:48)

7. Community Encouragement & Support

Dr. Hawley invites listeners to share their favorite affirmations and to reach out for guidance, reinforcing a sense of collective encouragement and support within the MS community. (18:47)

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

“If we can control our thoughts, we can control our actions, and if we can control our actions, we are more likely to reach our goals.” (05:08)
“If you are doubting yourself or the plan that you have before you even exercise, what are the chances that you're actually going to exercise? Very, very slim.” (07:49)
“Resting is a good thing.” (14:52)
“We're all motivated by different things and different phrases. So if you liked one of the ones I mentioned, go for it, steal it, it's now yours.” (17:24)

Timestamps for Important Segments

[01:11] – Introduction to the pep talk and setting the episode’s focus
[03:43] – Exploring the roots of negative self-talk & external influences
[05:28] – The uniqueness of each MS journey
[07:08] – Examples of negative thoughts before exercise
[08:17] – Common self-criticisms during exercise
[09:39] – How negative emotions get paired with exercise
[11:02] – Step-by-step guide: planning and goal setting
[14:34] – Positive affirmations to use during exercise
[16:48] – Strategies for building new, supportive mental habits
[18:47] – Call for listener participation and closing encouragement

Tone and Takeaway

Dr. Hawley’s message is supportive, understanding, and motivational. She addresses the listener directly with warmth and empathy, offering practical strategies without ever minimizing the real challenges of living—and exercising—with MS. The episode leaves listeners encouraged, better equipped to tackle unhelpful self-talk, and inspired to take the next step toward their personal goals.

Resources

Dr. Gretchen Hawley’s “Missing Link” online MS wellness program (details in show notes)
Contact info: Instagram, email, website (see show notes)

Summary prepared for The MSing Link podcast, Episode 290 by Dr. Gretchen Hawley, June 24, 2026.

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Transcript1 lines

[00:06]
A
The big question is, how does someone with Ms. Actually improve their mobility, strength, energy independence? The list goes on. My name is Dr. Gretchen Holley, physical therapist and multiple sclerosis specialist. Welcome to the Missing Link podcast. Tune in as I share the top strategies and exercises to help you gain control over your life with Ms. Using research driven insights and advice from top industry experts. Whether you're newly diagnosed or have had Ms. For over 30 years, whether you have relapsing Ms. Or progressive MS, this podcast is for you. You're sure to feel empowered and inspired after each episode. Ready? Let's dive in. Thank you so much for tuning in today. I'm glad to have you back listening to the podcast. I have a really special episode for you guys today and this is going to be a pep talk specifically for the person with Ms. Who knows that you should be exercising and maybe you even have a lot of exciting goals that you want to work towards. And you know you need to exercise in order to achieve those goals. But you are not exercising, at least not consistently or, or perhaps not at all. And one reason that you might not be exercising is because of this self talk that you have going on that exercising makes you feel a negative way. And that's very common. It's normal to get down on ourselves to the point where it prevents us from actually doing what we need to do in order to reach our goals, whether that's exercise or nutrition or healthier habits around sleeping or staying hydrated. So what I want to talk to you about today is self talk. Because again, I can't stress this enough. The way that we talk to ourselves matters, especially when it comes down to exercising and working towards our goals when you have Ms. Because as we all know, if you don't exercise when you have ms, it's unlikely that you're going to reach your goals that you're working towards. Because Ms. Has a tendency to attack specific muscle groups that cause weakness and tight muscles and poor balance and difficulty walking. So I first want to say that being in a habit of not exercising consistently is not only our own faults. You know, we might have some things that make us less likely to exercise. But keep in mind that you may have had doctors in the past that tell you that once you have ms, you you won't get stronger, or that if you have ms, you'll need a wheelchair and hearing things like that can make it less likely that you'll actually commit to exercising. So maybe you had some external perspectives like that at some point in your life, or also maybe you'd have noticed a regression or a symptom flare or multiple symptoms flare. So there's many, many reasons that it's normal to feel negatively about exercise. Just those few that I named are a couple examples. But I want to share the perspective that Ms. Is so different for each person that has Ms. And there is truly no one outcome. So it is impossible for any doctor, no matter how much experience they have in Ms. And how much research they're doing. No one doctor can ever say, oh, you have ms, this will be your outcome. It's different for each individual person. And if we can control our thoughts, we can control our actions, and if we can control our actions, we are more likely to reach our goals. This whole concept came about when I was talking with several of my Missing Link members as well as my one on one mentor membership participants and we were talking about the way they feel about exercise. And I am going to share with you a few thoughts that came up. And it's not just a few, it's actually several. But I want to share their verbiage with you because I know that my clients are not alone and I know that there are people listening to this episode right now that are feeling the same thoughts and saying the same thoughts to themselves. So a few common thoughts that some of my clients mentioned before they even exercise. So they're not exercising yet. They just had the thought of I should get my exercises in today. So a few thoughts were Will this really help me? Is this really what I need to be doing? I used to do so much more. This won't be helpful. Is this really enough? You can hear from those examples that there's a lot of doubt. If you are doubting yourself or the plan that you have before you even exercise, what are the chances that you're actually going to exercise? Very, very slim. If you don't trust that you know what you're doing or that what you're doing will actually help, it's very likely you're just not going to exercise that day or maybe even ever. And these negative, doubtful thoughts are so common. So those were just a few examples of what my clients were telling me before they even exercise. And then they shared with me a bunch of things that they say to themselves while they are exercising. So these are some examples. This isn't doing anything. That was terrible. I can't believe you can only do this. I'm so tired. I don't want to do this. I'm such a wimp. I'm lacking. I used to do so much More I'm not being consistent, I'm not working hard enough. Again, these thoughts while you're exercising are just tearing you down, making you feel like even though you're exercising, it's not enough, that it's not going to make a difference. And if that's what you truly believe, why would you continue exercising? What you're doing is you are pairing a negative emotion, an emotion of feeling doubt and discouraged and defeated along with exercise. So you truly are telling your brain that you want those two to be associated, that every time you exercise these negative emotions are going to come about. And unless we do something to change that pattern, that pattern will remain. Every time you exercise, you will start feeling doubtful, annoyed, frustrated, defeated, discouraged. So we need to change that pattern. And there's a few things that I would suggest you do. So first and foremost, in order to change your mindset so that you will actually exercise more or at least longer, a better duration, better frequency, in order to reach your goals, the first step is to have a plan. If right now you don't have a plan and you don't really know what you should be doing, but randomly you're exercising, that's one thing that can also throw you off because you will have those doubts of is this even what I'm supposed to be doing? I don't know what to do towards my goals. So the first step is to have a plan. Meaning figure out which goals you want to prioritize and which goals that you are working towards. Because you probably have lots of different goals, especially when it comes to improving functional movement. You might have a goal of improving your walking quality as well as walking longer distances and maybe an easier time getting in and out of a car or getting in and out of bed, or you want stair climbing to be easier or getting dressed. So pick just maybe one or two of those goals for now. We can always go back and find some other ones later on. But prioritize which goals you're actually going to be working towards and then have an exercise program that aligns with that. So if you know how to do that yourself, amazing. If you've been to physical therapy in the past and you've been given a program, an exercise program to help you with these goals. Amazing you can follow that. If you don't know what to do, seek out guidance from someone who is knowledgeable and can tell you that likely is going to be a physical therapist. So if you have an Ms. Specific physical therapist or at the very least a neuro certified physical therapist near you, reach out to them, see if you can get an evaluation or a few sessions with them to come up with this plan for you. If you don't have anyone like that near you. That is why I am available online. Of course you guys know this, but you can find me just in the show notes and my Instagram, my email is always open, my YouTube handle, my website, you name it. So first and foremost, prioritize which goals you're going to work towards. And then secondly, come up with an exercise program that will help you with that. And thirdly, and this is really important, feel confident in that plan and give it time to. Of course no one ever sees results right away, especially when Ms. Is involved. But trust the plan so that you'll do it long enough to see if there are benefits from it or not. So those are the first three steps. Number one, figure out what goals you're focusing on. Number two, come up with an exercise program or a plan to help you reach that goal. And number three, feel confidence in this plan. Then we get to our thoughts because it's going to be a habit. No matter how confident you are in that plan that we just talked about, your brain is in a habit of having negative emotions when you exercise. So you might be super positive going into your exercise routine today, but you go and do your first exercise and you're having some of those same thoughts. As I mentioned earlier, I don't want to do this. I'm not working hard enough. Will this really help? And that's just going to put you in a downward spiral of even more negative thoughts. So we need to change our mindset. So these are a few examples that I'm about to share with you that are phrases that you can say to yourself while you're exercising. And I offered these as suggestions to some of my missing link and mentor membership participants and they found them to be really helpful, which is why I wanted to share them with you. So this is the first thought that you can choose to think. I am doing exactly what I should be doing to reach my goals. This is enough to help me reach my goals. This is perfect for me right now. This is enough for me right now. This is a great start. I'm supposed to take rest breaks. Resting is a good thing. And you'll see that those phrases, those thoughts are much more positive. It reminds you that even if you feel like you are weaker than you used to or you used to do different exercises than you are now, it lets you know that, hey, this is good too. This is perfect for me. Right now, this is exactly what I need to be doing to reach my goals. So it is not that we are negating the negative thoughts or the negative experiences that we have had in the past. We are just changing our mindset around that thought to make it more positive so that actions follow. Whether it's a negative thought or a positive thought, it always results in an action, negative or positive. So if we have positive thoughts, we're more likely to have positive habits, positive actions that come from it. But any type of negative thought often leads to avoidance or negative patterns, bad habits. So the first thing is become aware that this is actually going on in your brain. Become aware that you're having some of these thoughts, and then make a plan and change your mindset. This is easier said than done, for sure. And this is something that you should write down. And anytime before you exercise, remind yourself of this because those negative thoughts are going to want to creep in. So we are working on changing the habit of a more positive mindset. If any of these phrases that I mentioned today feel good for you, like you heard it and you felt like, wow, I love that. That really feels true for me. Or geez, if I could think that way, oh my gosh, I'd exercise every day. If you felt that with any of the phrases, please take it as your own. But if you didn't feel that, make up your own, come up with a positive statement. It could be two words. It can be I can or I will try. I'll do my best. This is my best. It can be anything. But it should feel good to you. It should motivate you. And we are all different. We're all motivated by different things and different phrases. So if you liked one of the ones I mentioned, go for it, steal it, it's now yours. If you didn't take some time to think about what is the emotion you're feeling and what is something that you can say to turn that around to view it in a different perspective. I would love to know if you found this episode helpful, and I really hope that you did find it inspiring. And as a pep talk that gives you more hope and encouragement to actually get out there and do your exercises or at the very least find a plan that you can feel confident in. So please reach out. Let me know if you like this episode. Comment if you do have any phrases that you found that you like for yourself or maybe phrases that you came up with to help you with a more positive mindset around exercise. Just as a friendly reminder, if you are looking for more guidance with Ms. Specific exercise, I do have my online Ms. Wellness program called the Missing Link. As always, I'll leave a link down in the show notes where you can see exactly what the program includes. There's a link where you can sign up for a behind the scenes zoom. Call with me where I can show you the program, answer your questions, all that good stuff to see if it would be a good fit for you or not. Thanks for tuning in. I hope you have a great day. Thank you for listening to today's show. I am so grateful to have you as a listener. If you'd like extra resources such as a video of one of my seated exercise classes, my favorite core exercise exercises, and the opportunity to ask me your questions, head to missinglink.com insider. That link will be shared in the show notes along with links to my social media handles. If you loved this episode and think a friend or family member with Ms. Would benefit from listening, please go ahead and text or email this podcast to them right now. Sharing this Podcast Podcast will help me educate and empower as many Ms. Warriors as possible. Thanks again for joining and be sure to tune in next week for another episode of the Missing Link Podcast.