Hidden Cemetery with Kulap Vilaysack

Summary

Episode Summary: "Hidden Cemetery with Kulap Vilaysack"

Introduction

In this episode of The Neighborhood Listen, hosted by Burnt Millipede (Paul F. Tompkins), Joan Pedestrian (Nicole Parker), and Doug (Brett Morris), the trio delves into the intriguing mysteries surrounding Dignity Falls. Their guest for the episode, played by Kulap Vilaysack, brings a unique perspective on local history and hidden secrets within the town.

Listener's Inquiry: Discovering the Hidden Cemetery ([32:31] - [34:27])

The episode kicks off with a listener post from Michael Mearson, who poses an unusual question about accessing a hidden cemetery located on the Falls Farms property. Mearson explains that the cemetery is over a century old, housing the graves of some of the town's earliest settlers. His goal is to obtain photographs for genealogical websites and seeks contact information to gain permission for property access.

Introducing the Guest: Cade ([34:27] - [36:22])

Kulap Vilaysack introduces her character, Cade, a passionate history enthusiast with a deep interest in Dignity Falls' local lore. Cade shares her fascination with how people lived in the past, emphasizing her desire to explore the hidden cemetery to uncover the stories of those buried there.

Exploring Dignity Falls' Historical Mysteries ([36:22] - [45:17])

The conversation shifts to broader discussions about Dignity Falls' historical sites, including infamous "murder houses" and unique architectural landmarks like the pier house, reminiscent of the one in Despicable Me. Cade reveals her involvement in creating a detailed map of these murder houses for Halloween enthusiasts, complete with scratch-and-sniff features that add a visceral element to the experience.

One notable moment occurs at [45:36], when Cade proposes a controversial idea about improving the human microbiome by incorporating dead bodies' feces into one's system. This suggestion sparks a flurry of reactions from the hosts:

• Nicole Parker ([45:48]): "Have a point for the listeners."
• Cade ([52:58]): "But I did say. Just. I want to hear number two."
• Paul F. Tompkins ([52:24]): "But I did say. Just. I want to hear number two."

The hosts express concern and disbelief, emphasizing the ethical and health implications of such an idea. Nicole firmly advises, "Don't do this," highlighting the podcast's stance against unconventional and potentially harmful practices.

Cemetery Secrets and Local Legends ([45:17] - [60:35])

Cade continues to unravel the enigmatic aspects of the hidden cemetery, linking it to local legends and possible connections to Hollywood productions. She mentions Area 54, a silo for storing salt, which locals mistakenly associate with alien activity due to its imposing exterior and restricted access policies. The discussion hints at deeper secrets guarded by the town's realtors and the mysterious figure, Jebediah, who holds the keys to each grave, ensuring that visitors remain infrequent and the cemetery's lore intact.

At [59:18], Nicole reveals her exclusive tour experience, stating, "You can only visit the cemetery once," underscoring the cemetery's guarded nature. The hosts speculate on the reasons behind these restrictions, considering both preservation and the desire to keep supernatural elements hidden.

Humorous Interludes and Concluding Thoughts ([60:35] - [80:24])

The episode seamlessly blends serious discussions with lighthearted banter. The hosts and Cade engage in playful exchanges about expired food, trash compactors, and absurd hypothetical scenarios, maintaining an entertaining atmosphere throughout. Notably, Cade's unconventional ideas provoke both amusement and skepticism, reinforcing the podcast's comedic undertone.

Notable Quotes

• Nicole Parker ([45:31]): "Do not do this. Three questions real quick. Real quick."
• Cade ([62:55]): "Possibly."
• Paul F. Tompkins ([57:13]): "It's amazing. There's back."
• Nicole Parker ([59:02]): "They're the cemetery secret keepers."

Conclusion

"Hidden Cemetery with Kulap Vilaysack" offers a captivating blend of local history exploration and comedic improvisation. The episode invites listeners to ponder the hidden facets of Dignity Falls while providing ample laughs through the hosts' witty interactions. As always, The Neighborhood Listen delivers an engaging narrative that balances intrigue with humor, making it a must-listen for both newcomers and longtime fans.

Key Takeaways:

• Hidden Cemetery: A century-old burial ground housing early settlers, shrouded in mystery and guarded by strict access protocols.
• Local Legends: Tales of murder houses, peculiar architecture, and Area 54 add layers to Dignity Falls' enigmatic reputation.
• Ethical Boundaries: The podcast navigates sensitive topics with humor, emphasizing responsible discourse.
• Community Engagement: Listener contributions and guest insights enrich the narrative, fostering a deeper connection to the town's lore.

For more episodes and exclusive content, visit cbbworld.com and consider signing up for the Maximus membership to unlock ad-free archives and bonus room episodes.

Transcript

[Paul F. Tompkins]

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[Nicole Parker]

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[Nicole Parker]

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[Nicole Parker]

Is a mini meditation guided by Bombus. Repeat after me.

[Cade]

I'm comfy.

[Nicole Parker]

Comfy. I'm cozy. Cozy. I have zero blisters on my toes.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Blisters.

[Nicole Parker]

And that's because I wear Bombus. The softest socks, underwear and T shirts that give back. One purchased equals one donated. Now go to bombas.com wondery and use code wondery for 20% off your first purchase. That's B O-M-B-A-S.com wondery and use code Wondery at checkout.

[Cade]

Hi, I'm Paul F. Tompkins.

[Nicole Parker]

And I'm Nicole Parker.

[Cade]

On this podcast, we improvise in character using real posts from a popular neighborhood networking website.

[Nicole Parker]

Occasionally we change the names of some.

[Cade]

Streets and that's all you need to know to support the show and unlock the ad free archive as well as exclusive monthly episodes of the bonus room. Go to cbbworld.com and sign up for a Maximus membership.

[Nicole Parker]

And now please enjoy this episode of the Neighborhood.

[Cade]

Listen. Knock knock.

[Nicole Parker]

Who's there?

[Cade]

Your neighbor.

[Nicole Parker]

Good Indignity Falls. You're never alone. You've got the neighbor half ass and us, Vern and Joan. From coyotes to male theft to weird things to sell.

[Cade]

We'll cover it and meet new neighbors as well.

[Nicole Parker]

We'll chat about any posts you're missing, so just tune in to the Neighborhood Listen.

[Cade]

Welcome once more to the Neighborhood Listen, the podcast that looks at the neighborhood of Dignity Falls. I am your host, Burnt Miapede. But you know what? I'm not the only host. Why? Who's this?

[Nicole Parker]

Hello, I'm Joan Pedestrian and I'm a realtor here in Dignity Falls. The top one.

[Cade]

That's right.

[Nicole Parker]

And I'm a local actress as well.

[Cade]

That's correct. And I'm a pharmacist at the Dignity Fallsmassy. The pharmacist in chief.

[Nicole Parker]

If we're, if we're going to be bragging about, toot our horns.

[Cade]

Yes, let's toot those horns.

[Nicole Parker]

It's a new year. Let's toot our horns. It's a new season. Are we calling it season Susan? Because I really liked that.

[Cade]

I like season Susan.

[Nicole Parker]

Doug's pitch was season great.

[Cade]

Season great. Which I think is nice. But I don't think it's for us to say.

[Nicole Parker]

I'm not sure. Yeah, I don't think it is. But that is the quickest we've gotten to introducing ourselves in several episodes.

[Cade]

Right. I led with it this time.

[Nicole Parker]

Yeah, you really did. And you stayed. You state, you stared straight ahead. You would not look at me.

[Cade]

No.

[Nicole Parker]

It was like you were concentrating on a fixed point just to get through it.

[Cade]

Because I feel if I look at, you know, you have a very expressive face.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh. And so sometimes you talking about.

[Cade]

So sometimes when I, when I say these things and I'm looking at you.

[Nicole Parker]

You'Re due too much reaction. Well, I throw you off.

[Cade]

Yes. You're not doing anything wrong. I don't think you're doing anything wrong.

[Nicole Parker]

You know. Have you ever had it? Well, this happens in theater a lot, but I don't know if it happens in, you know, any kind of other way. And I know we did a mirroring exercise last season and it very much upset you.

[Cade]

It scared me.

[Nicole Parker]

Right. Well, because I think I was trying to show you what a theater exercise is. And then I think it turned into. You think I was mocking you and I was over mirroring and I felt very badly.

[Cade]

I was also very scared that that's what I. That's what how people see me.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, no, it's not at all. It's not at all. But what sometimes will happen when like you're auditioning for a show, maybe if you're in acting class and you're doing something like voting or singing, the person who's the teacher, the director, they do it with you. You know, they sort of go through the motions with you. And you want to say, stop, just let me do. I know how to do it, you know, and it's very, very frustrating.

[Cade]

That is. That surprises me because I would think that, look, I'm not an actor, of course.

[Nicole Parker]

Right.

[Cade]

But I've heard of actors who sometimes, if you are acting opposite this actor, there are certain actors who will be mout.

[Nicole Parker]

Mouthing the lines. Yes, yes. My mother in law does that. Doug's. Hey, babe. Hi. We haven't introduced you yet.

[Cade]

This is our Engineer.

[Nicole Parker]

Doug is our engineer. Hello? Hello?

[Cade]

Hello? Doug, are you there?

[Doug]

Yes.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Oh, whoa, whoa, whoa.

[Nicole Parker]

What's that, Doug?

[Cade]

What is that? What are we hearing?

[Doug]

I'm in the trash compactor.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, God.

[Cade]

You're in the trash compactor?

[Doug]

Oh, yeah. I'm looking for my golf clubs.

[Nicole Parker]

And if you're asking, yes, it's modeled after the Star wars one. And, yes.

[Cade]

Is there a bunch of water in there?

[Nicole Parker]

100%, yes. 100%.

[Doug]

It could be anything in that water.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, God. You know what's in it? You've rigged it. Do you have, you know, something?

[Doug]

Yeah. I put eels in.

[Nicole Parker]

Swim past. You put eels in there? This is, as you could imagine, not one of the rooms. That was my idea. You know, my ideas are, like the linen closet and the bean room.

[Cade]

Okay.

[Nicole Parker]

I was gonna say I didn't ask for a trash compactor room.

[Cade]

No, no.

[Doug]

And it's so we can use it.

[Nicole Parker]

What do you mean we can't. We have. We don't need it.

[Doug]

We're covered in trash.

[Cade]

We're covered in trash.

[Nicole Parker]

We're up for years. We are not. You make me sound like I run a dirty home. I run a very clean home, babe.

[Doug]

I would never say that.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

This.

[Cade]

Your house is very clean.

[Doug]

Most of the trash.

[Nicole Parker]

I do pride myself on this.

[Cade]

I've only ever seen two rooms of your home, but. But those rooms are very clean.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Okay.

[Nicole Parker]

Thank you.

[Doug]

I appreciate space, but I've seen the.

[Cade]

Kitchen and the mudroom.

[Nicole Parker]

I make you go to the bathroom in the mudroom.

[Cade]

That's right.

[Nicole Parker]

Somehow you've never seen a bathroom.

[Cade]

Chamber pot in there.

[Nicole Parker]

I'm sorry. I should let you use the bathroom once in a while. No, it's okay.

[Cade]

It would be weird now to use it.

[Doug]

So, Doug, we have surprisingly few bathrooms.

[Nicole Parker]

It is true. We have, like, 250 rooms more than that. And we have two bathrooms, right? Is that right?

[Doug]

Two and a half.

[Cade]

So it's a.

[Nicole Parker]

It's a. Yeah.

[Cade]

We have a 250 bed, two bath and a half.

[Doug]

It's not the happy at all.

[Nicole Parker]

Powder room. We take that.

[Cade]

Not the half you'd want. What does that mean?

[Doug]

It's more of, like, a closet. But, I mean, you can go in there if you want.

[Cade]

So there's no tub in there either.

[Doug]

No tub.

[Cade]

Okay. So it's just. It's a closet.

[Doug]

It's not a half bathroom, but it's got a low window.

[Nicole Parker]

He doesn't know what a half bath is.

[Cade]

Do you think half bathroom means half of it is the room and the other half Is the.

[Doug]

Well, I mean, if you take half of a bathroom, it could be any part.

[Nicole Parker]

It could be anything. I mean, look, if I could just be a realtor for the moment in the room, it means that you're not. You're going to have probably a bath or a shower. Just got a half bathroom. But which. Which makes no sense because the word bath then probably shouldn't even be in the. In the. In the description at all, because it is confusing. I get that. You know, and he also thought it meant half bath, like half of a bath. So one time he did just put. Bring in a half bath. He like, sawed it in half. And then he sort of like. What do you use for the end of it, babe?

[Doug]

The end of the bath.

[Cade]

To cauterize it.

[Nicole Parker]

Yeah.

[Doug]

Use a hot poker. Cauterize it.

[Nicole Parker]

Okay. I think that that was the wrong word to use.

[Cade]

Yeah.

[Doug]

I'll be honest. In our half bath, which is basically a closet, there is a window positioned pretty low to the ground. And I will use that sometimes when the other bathrooms are. Are filled.

[Nicole Parker]

It's like a doggy door, I suppose, is what he's saying. It's what he uses it for. That's terrible.

[Doug]

But I was going to say our children do pile up a lot of trash in the house.

[Nicole Parker]

Well, especially because they're all here now, as I mentioned before. The twins, their pilot.

[Cade]

Yeah.

[Nicole Parker]

For the Chick Fil A streaming network. Did not work. It didn't go right.

[Doug]

Right.

[Nicole Parker]

The prank pilot. And they are parents.

[Cade]

Prank pilot.

[Doug]

They are really in a funk.

[Nicole Parker]

They really are. They really are in a funk. And I think that's why he's building this, because this is one of the things that the boys loved. Back in the day in the bathtub, they used to play trash compactor. Like the Star wars trash compactor. They'd get like all the Star wars toys in there.

[Cade]

Yeah.

[Nicole Parker]

You know, they get like.

[Cade]

They would be the compactor.

[Nicole Parker]

Yes. Or they'd be the compacted. I mean, it was a whole thing. They made a mess. There was no.

[Cade]

The compactor has become the compact.

[Nicole Parker]

All the water out of the tub. I mean, it was a mess. So he's trying to do something to make them happy because they're just in a funk. And they are doing kindergarten right now.

[Cade]

Yeah. How is that going?

[Nicole Parker]

Well, with that old, old man. Yeah, the old, old man. They're there and he comes here. Just everyone's very clear. Because it's not appropriate for them to Billy Madison it. We're not doing that. They are. They're they're sort of regressing almost, you know. Yeah. They're. They're. They're not doing. They're the R's and their L's now all of a sud. They're like, mama, I love you. No, they're really 22. It's very weird.

[Doug]

They hold their crayons, like, in a fist.

[Nicole Parker]

And they're obsessed with poop.

[Cade]

Okay.

[Nicole Parker]

And dinosaurs.

[Cade]

And dinosaurs, sure.

[Nicole Parker]

So it's a bit strange. Although it's kind of lovely. I knew you were going to say that, Doug.

[Cade]

That's why they put in Jurassic Park.

[Nicole Parker]

It's actually.

[Cade]

They knew their audience.

[Nicole Parker]

It's been so. It's been sort of sweet, to be honest. And. And I don't. I mean, I do. I don't. But I do want to bring up what happened last time when I spoke to you about Gabby, your girlfriend, and I asked you, and you said you're thinking about next steps.

[Cade]

Yes.

[Nicole Parker]

And then I. And then you. You said, it does mean marriage or it does mean marriage. And then you got. You broke into a full sweat. And then we had to. We had to take a break.

[Cade]

Yes. Because we are talking about moving in together.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, wow. Okay.

[Cade]

And, you know, it's obviously. It's a big step, and it's obviously very scary.

[Nicole Parker]

Are you okay?

[Cade]

Yes, I'm good. I just. It does make. I haven't shared space with someone in that way in a very long time.

[Nicole Parker]

Yeah.

[Cade]

And I'm a little apprehensive about it.

[Nicole Parker]

Yeah, it does. Oh, wow. It does seem like it. It does seem like it. Oh, Bert just took out a beer.

[Cade]

Is that okay if I crack a cold one?

[Nicole Parker]

No. No judgment, but you should have gone into, you know, Doug's beer room for that. You know, he's got the one that looks like the mountaintop. I know, but in the super bowl.

[Cade]

Commercial, I didn't bring my rooms, and I just thought, I'll bring this one.

[Nicole Parker]

It is a hassle to go downstairs and do it.

[Doug]

Yeah.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, God.

[Cade]

Let me ask you this. In the trash compactor, why would your golf clubs be in there?

[Doug]

You know, I got so frustrated with golf. I was just. I. I swore it off forever.

[Cade]

Right.

[Doug]

And I just threw them in there.

[Cade]

Yeah.

[Doug]

And having second thoughts.

[Cade]

Right.

[Nicole Parker]

By the way, he only did ever mini golf. He would bring the full set of clubs.

[Doug]

Yeah. I'd bring my driver.

[Cade]

Now, I understand that made them very mad.

[Nicole Parker]

It made them so mad. It made them so mad. And it wasn't appropriate because he was getting in. You know, it's like you can have anger on the adult golf course, but not on a mini golf course. You know.

[Cade]

That's right.

[Nicole Parker]

And have anger.

[Doug]

I think it's healthy.

[Nicole Parker]

No, not in front of the little.

[Cade]

Not the kids.

[Nicole Parker]

You got to show it. Mini golf is only for people on a first date or with kids.

[Cade]

Doug, we never said you would hurt anyone.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, yeah, no, we didn't say that.

[Cade]

Anger. It's not good to display that at a. You know, I would try to go.

[Doug]

Behind the windmill and, you know, take it out on that windmill. But behind, you know, I try to.

[Cade]

Hide the noise is. And that thing's flimsy.

[Nicole Parker]

And also it's, it's just, it's very dangerous if no one brings a drink or bring a driver to a mini golf course. You know, like shipping. Yeah. You should be chipping from anywhere.

[Doug]

Selling the short game.

[Cade]

No, that's all mini golf is.

[Nicole Parker]

That's all mini golf, short game.

[Cade]

It's all putting.

[Nicole Parker]

Literally all the short game falls.

[Doug]

Mini golf, though some of the holes are pretty long.

[Nicole Parker]

Well, now it is true.

[Cade]

That is very true.

[Nicole Parker]

It's.

[Cade]

It's the 60 hole course. It takes up more room than an actual golf.

[Nicole Parker]

It does. It goes underground.

[Cade]

Yeah.

[Nicole Parker]

There's.

[Cade]

It's all black light down there.

[Nicole Parker]

There's an underground element.

[Cade]

Yeah.

[Doug]

There's the sewers and part of it.

[Nicole Parker]

Yeah. And one is like a par 29. I think it's really what it takes for. Some people give up at that point.

[Cade]

Oh, you. No one's ever done it.

[Nicole Parker]

Wait, no, I didn't know. No one had ever done it.

[Cade]

Ever done it. People. It's. It's by far the most frustrating hole and people just end up picking up the ball and taking it to.

[Doug]

Yeah, it's almost straight up.

[Cade]

Yeah. It's kind of impossible.

[Nicole Parker]

Yeah, it's like one of those things where like you, you, you, you whack the hammer to see how strong you are. It's like that the balls almost try. You're trying to get the ball to travel almost vertically. That's right. That's right. And then go into a hole.

[Cade]

Yeah. And then go into all.

[Nicole Parker]

Yeah. And it has this crazy sort of like waterfall one where it's a trap door. But it's like, you know how it'll go through like a castle and then it'll come out at the next, you know, sort of green over to the side. Right. It goes through a tunnel on a normal one, you know, you hit your ball into the castle or the trap door, goes through the little tunnel and Lands. Oh, I guess I used to call them trapdoors, but they really aren't. They're just the entrances, I guess. The entrance to the haunted house, the entrance to the castle. What would you call it?

[Cade]

A door.

[Doug]

But the door moves.

[Nicole Parker]

Yes, sometimes it moves. And that's why I called it a trap door.

[Cade]

I see, I see, I see.

[Nicole Parker]

Sure, fine. It's just a. It's just a.

[Cade]

So you have to. You have to get it in there while it's, While it's open.

[Nicole Parker]

Yes, yes. But. Okay, you know what I mean, though. It's going to go someplace else. It comes out at a different green.

[Cade]

Yes.

[Nicole Parker]

Okay.

[Cade]

Yes.

[Nicole Parker]

I'm not sure it's worth it now because that took so long.

[Cade]

It's always worth it. It's always worth it.

[Nicole Parker]

Well, they have one where it goes to the green but goes in another hole, then it goes to another.

[Doug]

Is where you get frustrated on the course.

[Nicole Parker]

Yeah, well, I stopped going because, you know, I'm not a great golfer. I'll be honest. I'm. I'm a singer, I'm an actress. I'm a realtor. You know, I'm, I contain multitudes, but one of them is not mini golf.

[Cade]

You know, I believe it was Craig on Southern Char who said, I'm. I'm a lawyer and a storyteller.

[Nicole Parker]

Huh? Wow.

[Cade]

Yeah.

[Nicole Parker]

Those people.

[Doug]

And I'm all out of storyteller.

[Cade]

They are.

[Nicole Parker]

I just can't get into it. What did you say, babe?

[Doug]

It didn't make any sense.

[Cade]

Wow. We're really second guessing ourselves on this episode.

[Doug]

I said, and I'm all out of storytelling.

[Cade]

You're all out of storytelling.

[Doug]

I'm a lawyer and a storyteller and I'm all out of storytelling.

[Cade]

Oh, like I came here to kick ass and chew bubble gum.

[Doug]

Yeah.

[Cade]

Was that they Live? Was that the first instance of that saying, I love that movie.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, but here we are in a movie again. Long to get us on a movie. This is becoming a movie.

[Cade]

And again, if you're listening for the first time, we are not a movie podcast.

[Nicole Parker]

We're not a movie guys. We just talk about movies a lot. Yes, they live. Is this a horror film? Because, you know, I do not like horror.

[Cade]

Not really a horror film.

[Nicole Parker]

What's it about?

[Cade]

It's more of a sci fi thriller kind of.

[Nicole Parker]

Really.

[Cade]

Yes.

[Doug]

It's about starting Rowdy Roddy Piper.

[Cade]

That's right. And Keith David. And you know what it's really about?

[Nicole Parker]

Zombies.

[Cade]

America, to put it quite simply.

[Doug]

I've heard that.

[Cade]

Got it from Me?

[Doug]

Yeah.

[Nicole Parker]

I haven't seen. They Live.

[Doug]

And that's where I heard it.

[Cade]

All right, well, we've got that all squared away.

[Doug]

I'm not hearing it. I heard it.

[Nicole Parker]

Should we start over? Well, I feel like we should definitely go way back. We should go way back.

[Cade]

We should go way back.

[Nicole Parker]

To where? I really wanted to hear about you moving in together, because this is what sent you into a spiral earlier.

[Cade]

So you want to hear more about that? Well, I mean, knowing that it sends me into a spiral.

[Nicole Parker]

So I feel like you're telling me. Please don't ask me.

[Cade]

I'm. I'm very.

[Nicole Parker]

Eyes. You're very.

[Cade]

My eyes.

[Nicole Parker]

Okay.

[Cade]

My eyes and my mouth are saying, please don't. Yes. It makes me very anxious.

[Nicole Parker]

All right. Because I don't want to blow.

[Cade]

I don't want to blow it.

[Nicole Parker]

I don't want to blow it.

[Cade]

But then what if I find out that we shouldn't be together? What if we move in together and it's a terrible mistake?

[Nicole Parker]

Bert, I'm just going to say this. It seems interesting to me that the two of you last year would have gone through a harrowing experience where you left Greece, and as you were leaving Greece, Mount Aetna exploded. Erupted, as we say.

[Cade]

Yeah, as we said.

[Nicole Parker]

And you made an emergency lava landing.

[Cade]

Lava landing, yes.

[Nicole Parker]

And you had to evacuate and sit on top of the plane.

[Cade]

That's right. We thought we were invincible for a while.

[Nicole Parker]

Squadron of helicopters came and picked you up. And then you had amazing sex afters.

[Cade]

As did everyone else on the plane.

[Nicole Parker]

And thought you were immortal for an entire year. Almost.

[Cade]

Correct.

[Nicole Parker]

It seems strange that after that, what you're worried about is just moving in together. Because I can't think of anything more scary than what you two went through.

[Cade]

Maybe it's that it's so normal.

[Nicole Parker]

Okay. Right. Because you guys were really living on the edge for a while.

[Cade]

We truly were.

[Nicole Parker]

And you also spent Christmas jumping into a fire with her father. Stepmother. Biological father. There was a cousin, I think her mother.

[Cade]

Her niece.

[Nicole Parker]

Sounds like a cult. Honestly, to me, if I'm gonna say that makes me worry. I know.

[Cade]

A little judgmental.

[Nicole Parker]

Well, it just. Well, it was a strange story. I'm just gonna say.

[Cade]

Okay.

[Nicole Parker]

And I love Gabby.

[Cade]

I would say it's unconventional.

[Nicole Parker]

Okay. That's a nice way of putting it.

[Cade]

Yes, it is. Nicer than strange.

[Nicole Parker]

I'm sorry. I apologize. All right. Well, I don't. I mean, I don't want to talk about myself, really, because I feel like I do it too much on this Podcast.

[Doug]

Can I just give one word of advice?

[Cade]

Sure.

[Doug]

Guy to guy.

[Cade]

Sure.

[Nicole Parker]

Guy to guy.

[Cade]

Hush, hush. I do. I what?

[Nicole Parker]

Oh.

[Doug]

Pinball machine in the garage.

[Cade]

You think that'll do it?

[Doug]

Oh, smooths everything. Yeah, yeah.

[Cade]

So if I'm ever, if I'm ever feeling sort of trapped or claustrophobic.

[Doug]

Yeah.

[Cade]

Go to the garage.

[Doug]

And there's the old drops and quarters.

[Nicole Parker]

He worked out a lot there. He had it. Yeah, he had it rigged up so that you still to put quarters in, but then you could just immediately get them back out. He worked out a lot in there and it worked out a lot of problems.

[Doug]

KISS pinball.

[Nicole Parker]

It was a KISS pinball machine.

[Cade]

My favorite was a. There was a 60 minutes pinball machine that I used to love and it.

[Nicole Parker]

Would play GM Warrior or GM Mike Wallace.

[Cade]

It was all of the whole gang.

[Nicole Parker]

Leslie Stahl.

[Cade]

It would be so Mike Wallace's biggest picture. And then like around him, like a sort of almost like a, like a sort of horoscope, astrology kind of thing would be the heads of, you know, Leslie Stahl, Cokie Roberts, Morley Safer. Andy Rooney.

[Nicole Parker]

Yes. Oh, Andy Rooney. Oh, yeah, I can't remember.

[Cade]

Remember when he got an earring, he was well into his 60s. He was like earring time. Harrison Ford. Same thing.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh yeah, you're right.

[Cade]

He's an older man. He's like, I'm gonna.

[Nicole Parker]

And is Andy Rooney like at his own special feature, like on the board. Like is it just his.

[Cade]

He rises up.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, I love that.

[Cade]

You get the ball in a certain place. He rises up, starts complaining.

[Nicole Parker]

I, I don't get it.

[Doug]

They ask you hard hitting questions.

[Cade]

That's right. To distract you.

[Nicole Parker]

Yeah, right. And then as you're running out of time, it's. Yeah, right. You just hear the tick, the ticking.

[Cade]

It's playing the whole time.

[Nicole Parker]

Whoa, that's terrible.

[Cade]

And you have to play it for a full 60 minutes. It just giving you the balls. You don't want to play anymore. But it's like it's. There's something, I don't know, it's sort of a flesh magnet. It keeps your hands on the flippers.

[Nicole Parker]

Sounds terrible.

[Cade]

It is in it. But what a great.

[Doug]

It'll fry the circuit board if you don't complete the 60 minutes.

[Cade]

That's right. Then the guy comes out and says, did you break my machine?

[Nicole Parker]

Yeah. Where was.

[Cade]

Was on the pier.

[Doug]

Yeah.

[Nicole Parker]

Really?

[Cade]

Yes.

[Nicole Parker]

All right. So we'd have to explain this. We've never talked about the pier because there's like no water left, have we?

[Cade]

Never Talked about the. Never talked about it used to be so much fun.

[Nicole Parker]

It used to be so much fun. We had a pier. Oh, I mean, we have a pier still. And is that arcade still even operational?

[Cade]

No.

[Nicole Parker]

Okay.

[Cade]

All the stuff is.

[Nicole Parker]

It.

[Cade]

It is 100 abandoned.

[Nicole Parker]

Right. It was called Pier 62, even though there's no other piers.

[Cade]

No.

[Nicole Parker]

And it was, you know, it was a family place for a while. Yes. And then there was a casino on it. Yes. It was the Pure family that spelled differently. Yes.

[Cade]

Their name was spelled P E A, R. Yeah. And people called them the Pear family. And they would get so my furious.

[Nicole Parker]

They're like big spear without the S. Yeah. So they would yell.

[Cade]

But then they would put. They had a picture of a pear on the sign.

[Nicole Parker]

So confusing.

[Cade]

Good riddance.

[Nicole Parker]

But it fell into disrepair. It sure did everyone.

[Cade]

They would not fix anything.

[Nicole Parker]

No.

[Cade]

They just let it crumble around them.

[Nicole Parker]

Yes.

[Cade]

And then.

[Nicole Parker]

Because they lived on the pier too.

[Cade]

They lived on the pier.

[Nicole Parker]

There was a mans on the pier.

[Cade]

Yeah. Very precarious.

[Nicole Parker]

So precarious.

[Cade]

Because it. The mansion was the width of a pier.

[Doug]

We really need zoning laws.

[Cade]

We sure do. Doug.

[Doug]

You can't just build a house.

[Cade]

We sure do. I mean, that's the one. That's the one thing I would change about Dignity Falls is put in some zoning laws.

[Nicole Parker]

For sure.

[Cade]

People can just do whatever they want.

[Doug]

It's the charm of the place, though.

[Nicole Parker]

It's some of the charm of it.

[Cade]

Allowed you to build an insane.

[Doug]

No rules at all.

[Nicole Parker]

Nope. He doesn't do anything through the city.

[Cade]

But it's a very tall mansion.

[Nicole Parker]

It's a very tall mansion. It looks a lot like the Despicable Me mansion.

[Cade]

I'll take your word for it. I haven't seen the film.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, you haven't?

[Cade]

No, I haven't.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, they're fun. They're fun. Steve Carell's like, girls.

[Cade]

What's that?

[Nicole Parker]

He says girls. He's saying girls. That's right. But it's like 25 syllables. Girls.

[Cade]

Is he addressing the HBO girls?

[Nicole Parker]

No, he's not. That'd be a weird crossover. I'll tell you what, that'd be very interesting.

[Cade]

The same universe.

[Nicole Parker]

Absolutely not. Maybe Adam Dr. Do you know?

[Cade]

I have not seen those.

[Nicole Parker]

He's honestly very Despicable Me. I'm giving Despicable Me.

[Cade]

I've not seen any of the Despicable Me's, but I heard so much about the Minions.

[Nicole Parker]

Yes. Oh, God.

[Cade]

So I said I have to look.

[Nicole Parker]

Up these Minions and that my boys. Oh. And of course I'm talking about my twins. We do. I didn't discuss. When I was talking. I'm talking about my boys. I'm talking about my twins. Matt and Dippity don't. Dippity don't. Yeah. Matt and Dippity don't. Dippity don't especially. They're very into the Minions right now because again, like I said, they're aggressive. Super into it. Y. Just run around going. But banana. That's what they like to say.

[Cade]

They love to say banana.

[Nicole Parker]

Yeah. And so you've seen the Minions where?

[Cade]

On. On YouTube.

[Nicole Parker]

On YouTube.

[Cade]

Yes. And I really enjoyed them. And I thought maybe I don't need to see these movies. I could just watch all these clips.

[Nicole Parker]

Well, sure, but it's fun to give them context, you know?

[Cade]

Is it. Is it more fun than what I'm already having? It's just seeing these pills talking to each other.

[Nicole Parker]

Pills?

[Doug]

Is that what they are?

[Cade]

They're pills, right?

[Nicole Parker]

They're not pills. I mean, they're shaped like they're not pills. And as a pharmacist, of course you see them as pills, Joan.

[Cade]

You're right. Yellow different.

[Nicole Parker]

Little yellow different. Remember when you ordered all that fake Dutch new print?

[Doug]

I do remember.

[Nicole Parker]

And it was never forget. It was a paralytic. You wouldn't bathroom for.

[Doug]

For about a week.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, that was a crazy time. That was a crazy time. I forgot what he ordered. All that black market. Definitely not new. It's spelled like N, I, E, U, P, R, Y, N. Who knew I.

[Doug]

Had an inspiration new.

[Nicole Parker]

I understand why you, as a pharmacist in chief, would see those things as pills.

[Cade]

Didn't even make that conn. You're absolutely right.

[Nicole Parker]

Because they're living, breathing organisms. They're not. They can't be pills.

[Cade]

That's why I won't. I won't take Tic Tacs because they.

[Nicole Parker]

Remind you of Minions.

[Cade]

Oh.

[Nicole Parker]

Because everybody. Tic Tacs are useless, frankly. They're just the worst. They used to be.

[Cade]

Terrible invention. They're for children.

[Nicole Parker]

They're for children.

[Cade]

Yes, yes, yes, yes. Remember they made those orange ones that weren't even.

[Nicole Parker]

Those are my favorite. I loved.

[Cade]

Of course. I did, too.

[Nicole Parker]

And then they said they do nothing.

[Cade]

To freshen your breath.

[Nicole Parker]

Nothing to freshen your breath.

[Cade]

No.

[Nicole Parker]

They're just sugar.

[Cade]

Yeah. Yeah. When you're going through that whole give.

[Nicole Parker]

Me real pills any day, I wish.

[Cade]

Real pills came in the Tic Tac container.

[Nicole Parker]

That would be great. But I think that people would do the. You know, I think they'd Shake them all into their mouth like you used to do with Tic Tacs. You would take too many too quickly.

[Cade]

And then everybody could hear you.

[Nicole Parker]

Isn't that a saying? Like she takes them like. Like you take Tic Tacs, which means a lot.

[Cade]

Yes. When they're talking about someone who does. Who does too many pills.

[Nicole Parker]

Sure.

[Cade]

Now, the only other sort of thing I can remember that had a container like that was.

[Nicole Parker]

Okay, I thought you were gonna talk about despicable me. And the last thing you remember.

[Cade]

The last thing I remember about despicable means Gorals ads.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, okay.

[Cade]

Breath Ashore was the only other container that you have. The little tiny.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, yeah, that's right. Yeah.

[Cade]

And Breath Ashore was a. Was a. Supposed to be some revolutionary breath thing where it would. It would freshen your breath from the stomach outward.

[Nicole Parker]

Ew, that sounds terrible. That's disgusting.

[Cade]

It was supposed to be plant based or something. I forget. I remember the commercial. Chlorophyll was in it. I can't remember chlorophyll. I'm terribly terrible.

[Nicole Parker]

It sounds nutty. What are you talking about? What are you talking about?

[Cade]

I didn't realize I was going to upset you both and I.

[Nicole Parker]

We really did have a big. Doug and I are on the same page when it comes to chlorophyll.

[Doug]

Yeah. I never thought one.

[Nicole Parker]

No need to go to the pinball machine for that one. I'll tell you why.

[Doug]

Someone puts chlorophyll on your mouth. I never thought they were fresh.

[Nicole Parker]

No, like, we never thought about it. So we never had to go out to the pinball.

[Cade]

Oh, no need to go to that.

[Doug]

When you see someone put chlorophyll to someone else's mouth. I never thought they were freshening their breath.

[Nicole Parker]

Definitely not.

[Doug]

Although I suppose.

[Nicole Parker]

But that's two different things.

[Cade]

Just so I'm hearing you, Doug, you said when you. When you would see somebody put chlorophyll in someone else's mouth, is that the.

[Nicole Parker]

Thing that is called chloroform? That's chloroform.

[Cade]

To knock someone out.

[Doug]

It's gotta be.

[Nicole Parker]

Yeah, babe.

[Cade]

And they don't put it in the mouth.

[Nicole Parker]

We're talking about a. We're talking about a. Like a. Like a. Sort of. Sort of like a plant's like actual biological reaction to something. Are you talking about something different? You're talking about making someone pass out?

[Doug]

I must. Yeah.

[Nicole Parker]

Okay. How do you feel?

[Doug]

Why do they name them so similar, you know?

[Nicole Parker]

Well, are they chloroform?

[Cade]

Chlorophyll.

[Nicole Parker]

That's pretty close, I guess. And you definitely don't want to get.

[Doug]

That's pretty close.

[Nicole Parker]

You don't want to get them up.

[Cade]

That would be funny.

[Nicole Parker]

It'd be funny in both cases.

[Cade]

I'm forgetting what chlorophyll actually is.

[Nicole Parker]

Well, I believe it's what is. Is created in a plant from. From a sun.

[Doug]

From a sun.

[Cade]

So the sun is the plant's food. They love it.

[Nicole Parker]

In fact. What is it? In fact, I had to say it with my whole chest. I'm afraid I'll be wrong.

[Cade]

Oh, I know I'm wrong. I know very. I.

[Nicole Parker]

To be honest, I might be crazy, but I think it's also what gives it the green color. I believe it's what gives it the act. Well, no. Well, let's say the word no. Chlorophyll is the word of the actual reaction, the actual thing that makes it green. So this is terrifying.

[Cade]

Plant eats sun, then plant make chlorophyll.

[Nicole Parker]

Women destroy man. Dinosaurs. And her. What?

[Cade]

Diners drive ins and dives.

[Nicole Parker]

Sorry, I was trying to do the part where Laura turn in Jurassic Park. Interrupts. Interrupts Jeff Goldblum. And she says dinosaurs kill man and women inherit the earth. But I got it all backwards. You know, my brain got ahead of my mouth.

[Cade]

Sure.

[Nicole Parker]

Happens so often.

[Cade]

Happens to us all.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, my goodness.

[Cade]

I just. So people know. I do know some science because I am a pharmacist, but I only need. I only know the science that I need to be a pharmacist.

[Nicole Parker]

Right. Chlorophyll wouldn't be in there. Chloroform would almost be something you need to know more about.

[Cade]

Absolutely. Because we have a lot of chloroforming synt. People coming in in a daze and they have a.

[Doug]

You could get a prescription for that.

[Cade]

You could get a prescription.

[Nicole Parker]

Yes.

[Cade]

That will. That will shock you out of your chloroform haze and back to reality. You know, we should take a break.

[Nicole Parker]

We sure should. I need a minute. I need a beer. Did you bring an extra one?

[Cade]

Sure.

[Nicole Parker]

Okay, great.

[Cade]

When we return, we will have more when the neighborhood listen returns Foreign Great news. Today's episode is sponsored by Acorns Early. Oh, now, April, as we've been talking about, is financial literacy month. The perfect time to start teaching your kids the value of money. And Acorns early makes it easy with their smart money app and debit card for kids.

[Nicole Parker]

Acorns Early's chores tracker teaches kids that hard work pays off. You just set up tasks in the app set a payment amount and tick the chore off when when it's done. Savings goals help kids turn savings into a habit and they can even choose their own target dates and turn on the optional auto save feature to help them get there.

[Cade]

And kids get a new sense of independence when they spend what they earn with their very own debit card.

[Nicole Parker]

That's cool.

[Cade]

And they get to choose from 35 plus customizable card designs. I wish I had that actually. Plus, kids can build up their money knowledge and their confidence with bite sized financial lessons. The Acorns early app has tons of fun interactive courses that help kids learn about all things money.

[Nicole Parker]

Parents can keep track of where and when their kids are spending. You get real time spend notifications. You can set your kids spending limits and instantly block lost or stolen cards. Acorns early lets parents pay allowances automatically. That is actually really handy. No more rummaging around for cash. God knows I rummage automatically send a weekly allowance to your kids account with just a few taps.

[Cade]

Now look, I don't have any kids, but I was a kid and I didn't know about money. I had to learn it the hard way. Right? It sucked.

[Nicole Parker]

Yes. So if you are ready to help your kids grow money, any skills that will last a lifetime, just head to acorns early.com TNL or download the Acorns early app to get started. Sign up now and your first month is on us.

[Cade]

Acorns early card is issued by Community Federal Savings Bank Member FDIC pursuant to license by MasterCard International. TNCs apply monthly subscription fee starting from $5 per month unless canceled.

[Nicole Parker]

That was so great.

[Cade]

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[Nicole Parker]

Hi, this is Susan. I am selling a mannequin for $25. That's it. I. As you can see, she is photographed here. She is lovely. She is the epitome of impossible achievable standards. Yes. My husband and her are having an emotional affair, and it is time for her to go. But if you could come quickly because he does not know why I'm doing this. Please come get her. I can't take it.

[Cade]

Oh, yeah, that was for me, maybe.

[Doug]

Oh. Can I join you guys?

[Cade]

Sure.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, there we go. Wow.

[Cade]

This is gonna be a fun record.

[Nicole Parker]

This will be a fun record.

[Cade]

All right. We do have a guest here on the neighborhood. Listen, here's what we do. We scour the neighborhap, the social networking application for neighborhoods, and we look at Dignity Falls or residents, See if there's anybody interesting to talk to, somebody who needs to amplify a message, somebody who has a question, somebody who is in some sort of trouble.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, yeah. Sometimes.

[Doug]

God.

[Cade]

Yeah.

[Nicole Parker]

It's okay.

[Doug]

Sorry. This was a can of tomatoes.

[Cade]

Why would it have an opening?

[Nicole Parker]

Like. Is it because you got it in the trash compactor? Oh, yeah. Ew. That's so disgusting.

[Doug]

It was unopened.

[Cade]

It's also wasteful just to throw an unopened can of tomatoes.

[Nicole Parker]

Most cans of tomatoes don't open like that.

[Cade]

No, they shouldn't.

[Nicole Parker]

No.

[Doug]

Well, this one has a lot of gas.

[Nicole Parker]

Yeah. They don't hiss. They don't make that sound.

[Cade]

Is it expired?

[Doug]

I. I believe so.

[Nicole Parker]

And also, I'm very concerned that you got as far as actually drinking out of it. And nothing else tipped you off that it wasn't a beer.

[Cade]

Is there any light in there?

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Is it V8?

[Nicole Parker]

We've got. Wait. We have to introduce our guest. Fine. We just don't want you to not. We want everyone to know who you are.

[Cade]

It's probably good you did that because.

[Nicole Parker]

Thank you.

[Cade]

We would have been talking to Doug about being in the trash compactor with.

[Nicole Parker]

No lights on for alibi saved us. But let's find out who we're talking to for everybody's sake.

[Cade]

So what we do is we scour the neighborhap, look for interesting people to talk to. And this is no different. If you have one that you think we should talk about, why don't you screenshot it and send it to us at Bert and Joan gmail dot com. This we have a listener that sends us this. Michael Mearson sent us this post. And this is a post in the recommendations section. And this is from someone named Cade. The sort of headline is Land Access. Good afternoon all. Cade continues. I have a super odd question. I'm kind of a history nerd, especially when it comes to local history. And there's a hidden cemetery located on the Falls Farms property that a lot of you probably don't even know about. It's pretty old and nobody has been buried here in at least 100 years and contains some of the earliest settlers in the old dig area. I'm interested in getting some photos of it for a couple genealogical websites and was curious if any of you had any good contact information that I could get in order to receive permission to access the property. I hope you all have a good weekend. Cade signs off. And here to tell us more about this is Cade. Cade, welcome to the neighborhood. Listening.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Thrilled to be here. Thank you for having me.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, our pleasure. Yes, yes, yes.

[Cade]

So you're a history buff. Specifically Laura. Local history.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

I'm just interested in how people lived.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, okay. Which is interesting because you were asking about a cemetery.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

That's right.

[Cade]

Great catch.

[Nicole Parker]

Thank you. So what are. Can you give us an example of some other parts of Dignity Falls that you have explored history wise? Some things that you have maybe. Do you have an Instagram account or do you have a substack? Where are you sort of letting us know what you've discovered?

[Paul F. Tompkins]

You know what? People have been talking to me that I should do a sub stack.

[Nicole Parker]

Okay.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

And I understand that it's sort of like only fans for writers, but I think that I am not. I don't know if I'm there yet. I don't know how I would charge. But that is definitely.

[Cade]

You can do it for free as well.

[Nicole Parker]

That is true.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Why would you do that?

[Cade]

I don't have a good answer for that. I suppose. I suppose it depends on how civic minded you are. If you. If you feel like this. Sharing this information is helpful to other people as well.

[Nicole Parker]

I do always feel bad when I read a sub stack and the thing pops up and it's like, you know, do you want to join or what? And says something like, I'm bored. Or like, no, I'm not that interested. You have to click on something that's very.

[Cade]

Oh, I love those.

[Nicole Parker]

Of course you do. And let me. I'm sorry, while we're. While we're stopped. Babe, this is my husband. You can't hear him, but he's in a different room. Just, you know, substack. We're talking not about a sandwich, not about a big sandwich. And I know that's what you're thinking about.

[Cade]

He's picturing 100%. He's definitely a stack of submarine sandwiches.

[Nicole Parker]

With, like a gigantic five foot toothpick going through it.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Is your husband Dagwood?

[Nicole Parker]

No. Oh, my goodness. Oh, very good. Amazing.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

What would it have been like if he lived?

[Nicole Parker]

Doug? Oh, wow. Right?

[Cade]

Oh, that's.

[Nicole Parker]

That's like an alternate history. Oh, I like that.

[Cade]

What if Dagwood was a real person?

[Nicole Parker]

Yeah, I like that. So, okay, so you're not sure you want to do a substack, but tell us about some of the historical places you've discovered in Dignity Falls.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Well, of course, all of the haunts that you all know. That's where we all start. Right?

[Nicole Parker]

We.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

You know the town square.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, yes. So much there.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

You know, I even have, like, of course, like, all of us interested in, like, various, like, murder houses.

[Nicole Parker]

Yes, yes, Unfortunately, a lot of. Yes.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

It is unfortunate, but you know the map at Halloween that gets passed around of all the murder houses? I helped put that together. And that really is.

[Nicole Parker]

I love that. It actually is. Really. It's very informative.

[Cade]

It's very informative. It's very whimsical and very. It's gruesomely detailed.

[Nicole Parker]

It really is.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

And some people have.

[Nicole Parker]

The mat bleeds. It bled. It's amazing. Yeah.

[Cade]

How do they.

[Doug]

Scratches.

[Nicole Parker]

How do you do that?

[Cade]

It's scratch and sniff.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

It's very visceral.

[Cade]

There's a QR code that leads to pictures of the victims.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Now, my. My part of it is some people don't enjoy as much. I get kind of lost in sort of the weeds of like. Of just the tiles.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, the weeds and the tiles.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

So I kind of get hung up on that, you know.

[Nicole Parker]

Okay.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Because that's just so interesting. It's like, did. And for me, it's. What's interesting about that is, did that lead to the murder or is there any correl it hasn't yet. It has. I haven't found it, but it's like I. That's one of my thoughts.

[Nicole Parker]

So do you visit these murder houses? Is that what you're saying?

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Oh, of course I have. Of course. Accurate.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, yes. Because I Like in like a cold case kind of way.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

No, no, no. In an appreciation of homes. And they have happen to be connected to gruesome murders.

[Cade]

Okay. Are you interested in homes that have no connection to a gruesome murder?

[Nicole Parker]

It's just a question.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

What the public is interested at this time.

[Cade]

I see. So you're following what people are interested.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Yeah, but of course we have a lot of interesting architecture. I'm looking at Doug, but he's not in the room.

[Nicole Parker]

But you're referencing him. He can always feel it when people are gesturing to him.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

There's very interesting.

[Nicole Parker]

It's uncanny.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

There's not a lot of mid century modern here.

[Nicole Parker]

That is true.

[Cade]

We skipped over that period.

[Nicole Parker]

Yeah, we really, really did.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

It's just mainly what we call Franken Victorians.

[Nicole Parker]

Yes. That. The. The pier. The how? The Paris. The pier. Pier house.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Right, of course.

[Nicole Parker]

On the pier. I just don't know how to say.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

It is a real Hotel Transylvania.

[Nicole Parker]

It really is. It really is. Oh, burnt. That's another great one. You've got to watch. Adam Sandler plays a vampire. It's great.

[Cade]

Wow.

[Nicole Parker]

Never seen that. Yeah. Oh, it's fun, baby. Love it.

[Cade]

Sounds like.

[Nicole Parker]

Watch it with the boys. They'll love it anyways.

[Doug]

Sorry, Meaning Tony and my friends.

[Nicole Parker]

Your children. Those boys, baby. What?

[Cade]

What?

[Nicole Parker]

Wow.

[Doug]

You say the boys.

[Nicole Parker]

Okay, you're right.

[Cade]

Well, we've got our boys.

[Nicole Parker]

We've got our boys back in the house. So.

[Doug]

Yeah.

[Nicole Parker]

Anyways, I'm so sorry.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

They're 22, you said they are. Oh, wow.

[Nicole Parker]

Yeah, yeah, they are. I don't want to talk about it much.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Oh, my goodness.

[Cade]

They love to set fire.

[Nicole Parker]

But they loved your murder house map. Let me tell you. Boy, oh boy. They. They would have just gone crazy for that as kids. Like, they would have really loved it. But okay, so. So you are in the houses. And how often would you visit these houses? Would you. You say?

[Paul F. Tompkins]

I mean, to make. To help complete that map. I probably spent upwards of a year.

[Nicole Parker]

Wow.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

But just to really see how people walked. I'm interested in that way. How did they live? How they walked within the house, how did they breathe?

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, so you're literally in the house. Wait a minute. This is. How can you even determine that?

[Paul F. Tompkins]

I'm a history buff.

[Nicole Parker]

Is that what it could there be.

[Cade]

That much difference between how people breathed then and how we breathe now?

[Paul F. Tompkins]

I like to immerse my. Yes, of course there's environmental factors. I'm sure.

[Nicole Parker]

Okay. Okay.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Maybe socioeconomic factors.

[Cade]

Sure. In breathing.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Absolutely.

[Nicole Parker]

Maybe.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

You know, there are. They use the makeup. Max factor.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh yeah. In the 80s. Max Factor is definitely a factor.

[Doug]

Dental.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Dental.

[Doug]

Different dental.

[Cade]

It includes dental.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

You know, you're born with all of your teeth ready to go, stacked up.

[Nicole Parker]

It's so creepy. That creeps me out. I don't like thinking about it.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

It's amazing.

[Cade]

It is.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

I guess it is amazing.

[Nicole Parker]

So now I want to know what you were interested in. Is the. In the cemetery.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

It's not sexual. Oh, wow.

[Nicole Parker]

I didn't mention that at all.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

I think we were gonna guess.

[Nicole Parker]

I wouldn't have thought that. But now I have a lot of follow up questions.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

It's not. And the murder house is not sexual at all. I just want to get ahead of that.

[Cade]

I know the first thing that wasn't sexual.

[Nicole Parker]

The cemetery.

[Cade]

The cemetery.

[Nicole Parker]

Okay. And now the murder houses aren't. Why do you feel the need to get out ahead of it?

[Cade]

Yes.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

My ex husband.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh boy.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

When I told him about this, he was like. Because this is like some sort of kink. And I kept have to say no, no.

[Cade]

But that was his first question. Question.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Yeah. But he's. He's just trying to hurt me.

[Nicole Parker]

And as we always say, we do not kink. Shame. On the show, never. That's our policy.

[Cade]

Not on Mike. And his name. His name was Murray.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Murray.

[Cade]

Okay.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Yeah, Murray. Murray Leonard.

[Nicole Parker]

Okay.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

We still live together.

[Cade]

Oh, really?

[Nicole Parker]

That like.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

It's not great. It's just.

[Nicole Parker]

And why is it. Is it just a financial situation? Sure, sure, sure.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Absolutely. And it's. It's. I think it's really tough to find a roommate.

[Cade]

What necessitates you still having to live together?

[Paul F. Tompkins]

I don't make a lot of money, okay? Oh, that's why you're selling.

[Nicole Parker]

Because you don't have any way of making money for your. You know, you didn't get paid for the maps. You didn't sell them.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

I did. But it's just. It's not a lot. It's not, you know, And I did try.

[Nicole Parker]

See, someone just handed one to me. I don't know where I got mine, but I didn't know you were selling them.

[Cade]

No one ever knows.

[Nicole Parker]

Is that part of the mystique? You just wanted it to feel like it just came into our hands.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Sometimes I. I dress in a ghillie suit. And I just. Every Wednesday, I dress in a ghillie suit.

[Cade]

If people don't know, ghillie suit is one of those things that hunters use and snipers where it looks like you're a big grass monster.

[Doug]

I love those.

[Nicole Parker]

Yeah, they're great.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

But oftentimes it's very comfortable. I don't try to pretend like I'm a monster. I'm more like, oh, it's a bush that hands you a flyer.

[Cade]

The idea of them is not to.

[Nicole Parker]

Pretend, it's not to scare, it's to inform.

[Cade]

That's just a pleasant bonus that you can do.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

I'm just trying to sort of blend in and just observe. And also just have a little whimsy.

[Cade]

Yeah.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

On a Wednesday.

[Nicole Parker]

I love. I love a little whimsy on a Wednesday.

[Cade]

So do you do this at Gilly Park?

[Paul F. Tompkins]

I do.

[Nicole Parker]

I do.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

I do a Gilly park. And then it is sort of like.

[Nicole Parker]

A nude beach of ours, except for everyone there.

[Cade]

Everyone there is wearing ghillie suits. But the.

[Nicole Parker]

The trees seem to move.

[Cade]

All of the natural occurring greenery there also looks like ghillie suits. So it's really a perfect magnet.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

It's mainly. There's less trees there and more just sort of hedges and shrubs. And of course, you know, the maze.

[Doug]

People put their dogs in ghillie suits too.

[Nicole Parker]

That's a very sweet moment.

[Cade]

It's very sweet.

[Nicole Parker]

And the maze is treacherous, though. That could be really. We've lost a lot of people.

[Cade]

There's so many people still in there.

[Nicole Parker]

Yeah, that's right.

[Cade]

Like that movie the Corn or whatever I saw. The Children of the Corn.

[Nicole Parker]

It says literally a movie called the Movie.

[Cade]

I think there's. I think it's called the Tall Grass.

[Nicole Parker]

You're kidding.

[Cade]

And it is just tall grass that people get lost.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, no, that's ridiculous.

[Cade]

Time and space shifts and all that.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, boy.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Terrifying.

[Nicole Parker]

Don't bother.

[Cade]

Don't bother everyone.

[Nicole Parker]

So, okay, so then 20, 19. He looked it up. Fast. Faster than he can tell us how long we've been talking.

[Cade]

How is that possible?

[Doug]

I would have guessed that was in the 60s or something.

[Nicole Parker]

No, that does sound like a sort of a. Yeah, it makes actually sound a lot of sense. People weren't paying attention to.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Is that Clint Eastwood? Am I a Hmong kid?

[Doug]

My dad used to always yell at.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Us, get out of my yard.

[Nicole Parker]

What did he yell at you?

[Doug]

Stay out of the tall grass.

[Nicole Parker]

Okay. Yes, yes, yes. Very good. Yes. So I want to get to the cemetery of it all.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Yeah, Just this idea. And I know you're in real estate.

[Nicole Parker]

I am.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

And that's why I agreed to come on. Well, I guess first just get ahead of that. It has nothing to do with sex.

[Cade]

Okay.

[Nicole Parker]

You keep getting parts that we or.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Any of that type of stuff.

[Nicole Parker]

Intimacy. What an extra detail tail do with that. But because now even if I thought.

[Cade]

Sex, I never would have got my intimacy.

[Nicole Parker]

Absolutely not. Absolutely not.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Isn't that the edges of the same sword? Sex. Intimacy.

[Nicole Parker]

Have a point for the listeners.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

I'm pretending that I'm holding Excalibur.

[Nicole Parker]

Yes.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Flipping it.

[Cade]

Yeah.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

You're sword.

[Cade]

You're doing well. Giving it the weight.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Yes.

[Nicole Parker]

Yeah, we're giving receiving of it forged by Merlin. Oh, well, I can tell you a little bit about the cemetery and you know about it.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Yes.

[Nicole Parker]

Well, yeah, but here's the thing. I guess. I guess I. I thought that I had discussed this on the podcast, but maybe I haven't because people weirdly don't know this. I mean, when you become a realtor, they tell you this. It's kind of like when you become the president, they tell you where like the aliens are. You know what I mean? Oh, yeah.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

You get.

[Nicole Parker]

So when I was sworn in and there is a swearing in when you become a realtor. Filter. Do they tell you at a day spa.

[Cade]

Do they tell you about Area 54 here in Dignity Falls?

[Nicole Parker]

Yes.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

There's an Area 54.

[Cade]

Yes. Some people say it's a disco. Some people say it's where aliens are. Some people say it's both.

[Nicole Parker]

What it really is is a silo for salt. You know, it's a. It's where we store the salt for the summer.

[Cade]

Boo.

[Nicole Parker]

No, no, no. What I mean is it. It. It. It looks like it appears to be that on the outside.

[Cade]

Oh.

[Nicole Parker]

But this is why it's very. You know, because when do you ever look inside those things? Never. So that's what I'm trying to say. That's awfully awesome. Obviously what its front is. I've only ever seen fronting for assault. Silo.

[Cade]

Sure. I've only ever seen the inside of a silo in the movie Witness.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, yeah.

[Cade]

Where someone is. I think it's Danny.

[Nicole Parker]

Lots of. Lots of fraught looks in that movie.

[Cade]

Lots of fraught looks.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Is this a movie podcast?

[Cade]

I know.

[Nicole Parker]

I knew you were gonna say that.

[Cade]

So sorry, Kade.

[Nicole Parker]

It is always how to explain that. I'm so sorry. You came here for information about that cemetery. So what I was told was. And most people don't know this because they think it was a Studio. That is the cemetery where Thriller was shot.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

What?

[Nicole Parker]

Yes.

[Cade]

What?

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Yes, I have been in discords, in message boards, in gorge. Engorged.

[Cade]

What?

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Babe gorged on the board.

[Cade]

Doug, that was. What did you say?

[Paul F. Tompkins]

You know, I did say engorged.

[Nicole Parker]

Doug.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

NY's tone has merged.

[Nicole Parker]

Wait, that was you, Bert.

[Cade]

What is.

[Nicole Parker]

Who said gourds?

[Paul F. Tompkins]

I said.

[Cade]

I did say.

[Doug]

Gordon, why are you so upset about that?

[Cade]

Because I heard discords and message boards and I. I just. I panicked.

[Nicole Parker]

Okay, I understand. I'll admit I panicked. Sorry, I didn't mean to throw a wrench in the works. Okay, so you've been on all the boards and all of the chat rooms, and people have been trying to discuss that.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

The Reddits. But no. No one's brought up.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, no one. No one knows.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Spread up any sort of connection to the late. And rest in peace, Michael Jackson.

[Cade]

Peace.

[Nicole Parker]

Vincent Price also was flown out. He stood there and did the monologue right as everyone was coming, just off camera, as they were coming out of. No, but they were like. They were like, this is going to make it like, I feel it. It'll help the dancer, it'll help the dancers, it will help the zombies.

[Cade]

Anger is leg from every tomb Are closing in to seal your doom. The funk of 20,000 years.

[Nicole Parker]

I hate that part. That's my least favorite part. The funk of 20,000 years.

[Cade]

It's awful.

[Nicole Parker]

No, thank you. No, thank you.

[Cade]

Oh, Kate's doing the dance.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

She had the dance. I have some moves.

[Nicole Parker]

So what is really the reason why no one really talks about this is because they did exhume some bodies in order to make space for people to get in there and climb back out.

[Cade]

They also made some of the bodies dance. What they did was what? You know that thing where you have a pole and you could put dummies on the pole.

[Nicole Parker]

There was no cgi. There was no AI back then. This is what they had to do. No way.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

And use of a mannequin seems not realistic.

[Cade]

Well, it was. John Landis was the director and he really wanted to do it this way.

[Nicole Parker]

He's a real sicko.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Yeah. Rest in peace, sicko.

[Nicole Parker]

RIP He's a real sicko.

[Cade]

He's a real sicko. Rest in peace. Eventually.

[Nicole Parker]

Eventually.

[Cade]

So it is. It is. I think that's a lot of the reason why people. They don't let people back in the cemetery, I would guess.

[Nicole Parker]

Well, yes. I mean, I think they're trying to keep the secret, which this is why I feel weird about. We might just cut this part out. Sure. But while I'm trying to just sort of keep the secret of that. Because the realtors keep the secret.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

We're the.

[Nicole Parker]

We're the cemetery secret keepers.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

You're the oath keepers.

[Nicole Parker]

That's right.

[Cade]

The body keeps the score, and the realtors keep the secret.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Wow.

[Cade]

Yeah.

[Nicole Parker]

But. So I think that, like. But I think if you go there, people say there's still some remnants of, like, the evidence of people being. Of people being there, of the set having been there, of the production team having been there. You might find some crazy things if you went there. Some fun mementos.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Yeah.

[Nicole Parker]

Maybe a shoe. Maybe there's one of Michael's shoes. I don't know. Oh, I don't know. That's hoping for too much.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Do you know if the bodies that were exhumed were put back or were they. What happened?

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, I sure hope so. Although, I don't know, maybe they made it big because that was their big break in the video.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

You think they got more work?

[Nicole Parker]

I think so. Do you think they got easier representation than a real person? Anything's possible.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

I bet they were Taft, Hartley.

[Cade]

Some of those corpses are in the union now. The Screen Actors Guild.

[Nicole Parker]

Yeah, absolutely. A couple. Yeah. I mean, it was a day. Right. But who knows? The shoot.

[Cade]

Oh, day race shoot.

[Nicole Parker]

The shoot famously took two months.

[Cade]

That was a close one.

[Nicole Parker]

And they had to do it in the dark. Dark of night, you know, every night. So I don't Word is that, like, they were all living here in town, you know, while they were shooting it, but no one knows where they stayed. Which would be another great thing for you to find out, like, where did they put up Michael Jackson?

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Well, that Bed and breakfast, obviously.

[Nicole Parker]

I mean, it seems obvious, right? It does seem obvious.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

We don't.

[Nicole Parker]

Yeah, the beat at Airbnb does seem obvious.

[Cade]

And that's the Beat it family.

[Nicole Parker]

Yeah. They say it's Airbnb.

[Cade]

Id.

[Nicole Parker]

That's right. Beaded.

[Cade]

Beaded Family.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

And that. That was the family owned it. They called it way before Airbnb. It wasn't.

[Nicole Parker]

Because it wasn't Michael Jackson. Stage coincidence.

[Cade]

Yeah.

[Doug]

I think I thought they were trying to lure Air Jordan.

[Nicole Parker]

Why?

[Doug]

But they got Michael Jackson.

[Nicole Parker]

How would they been luring it with the word. With the name. Beaded air. Beat It. Air.

[Doug]

Beat and Beat It.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

But you said that it was before Airbnb, Doug.

[Nicole Parker]

Air Jackson. Oh, boy. Wow.

[Doug]

I think we got a. I think this tomato.

[Cade]

Yeah, that's right. I bet. I bet it's off. It's gone off. Yeah.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Huh?

[Nicole Parker]

It has gone off. It Definitely has gone off, that's for sure.

[Cade]

So, Cade.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

I know, I. When I say titillated, I don't mean.

[Nicole Parker]

It'S sexual, of course, or intimacy or.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Intimate in any way in the way that you think of.

[Cade]

You don't think of it as sensual, essential.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

But I will say you are describing. Okay, I'm going to be. Come up. Come clean up.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, wow.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Okay.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, wow.

[Cade]

Please.

[Nicole Parker]

We do love.

[Cade]

Honestly, you can say whatever you want here.

[Nicole Parker]

Yeah, it's a safe space.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

I. I guess I just have a bee in my bonnet and an ID idea that I've been thinking about. I mean, you've heard of, like, you know, like, improving your gut biome.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, sure.

[Cade]

Yes, I have.

[Nicole Parker]

Right.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

And how some people will put like, babies poop and they'll correct like a douche.

[Nicole Parker]

This is true. It's true. Burn. This is true.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

You.

[Cade]

You.

[Nicole Parker]

Have you heard of this?

[Cade]

No, and I wish I could remain that way.

[Nicole Parker]

You know what? I gotta say, I've never seen burns eyes bigger than they are now. When they say people's eyes are saucers. This is actually true. Your eyes are bugging out of your.

[Cade]

I'm trying to figure out how this would improve anything.

[Nicole Parker]

Well, because apparently the gut biome of one person is different from your own, and so maybe theirs would benefit you.

[Cade]

So this is. One man's trash is another man's treasure.

[Nicole Parker]

Correct. In case. In this case, it's feces.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

One man's waste.

[Nicole Parker]

That's right. This is another man's wealth.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Well, that's right. That's right.

[Cade]

And it's something to do with babies.

[Nicole Parker]

Well, sometimes they use a baby. This is so true.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

So you put it in sort of like. You know what? I.

[Nicole Parker]

It's hard to say it in any way other way. Yes, exactly. Put it up your butt. You put it up your butt, you make it juice. Or you can take it in pill form, which is actually terrifying to me, apparently.

[Cade]

Is this what adrenochrome is?

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, I don't know.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

I don't know what that is. Tell me about it.

[Nicole Parker]

Is that the new Christopher Nolan?

[Cade]

I wish I hadn't said that, because.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Now you have to explain it.

[Cade]

Well, this is the thing that certain people believe. Believe that the wealthy elites are extracting this from children and drinking it so.

[Nicole Parker]

They can live forever. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, sure. It's not that. This is not.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

It's not this.

[Nicole Parker]

There's actually some regular people.

[Cade]

For a moment I thought.

[Nicole Parker]

Well, I mean, now they're regular.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Well, I'm a little nervous to keep Going.

[Nicole Parker]

No, please, no. We've already passed the shop.

[Cade]

I apologize. I apologize.

[Nicole Parker]

I'm here to also corroborate this for you. This is a thing.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Yeah. So you put like, let's say maybe.

[Nicole Parker]

I don't know where it's going re the cemetery and dead people.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

But I, I appreciate that you're going to accept anything that I say.

[Nicole Parker]

Great. I'm ready to do it.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

That's what I hear. So the.

[Nicole Parker]

I have a reputation.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

A grandmother might say, oh, let me put a little bit of my grandson's dookie.

[Cade]

Perhaps a grandmother.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Can I have a little bit of his dookie?

[Cade]

Okay, okay.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

And I put it in sort of a douche. And I shoot it up.

[Nicole Parker]

That's right.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

The grandmother shoots it up.

[Nicole Parker]

True.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

And it helps with her microbiome.

[Nicole Parker]

That's right.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

I'm interested. Is what. Okay. I'm interested in the part I'm waiting for. Right. I'm like, oh, oh, okay. A baby who's. Who's alive now, but what if like a hundred year old. Wait, because like when you die, right? Don't you like. Like you get rigor mortis and then you shit. Right.

[Cade]

I think it's the other one. The second one first.

[Nicole Parker]

Wait, please say you're not talking about. Can I jump ahead to where you're talking about putting anything of a dead person in your body?

[Paul F. Tompkins]

That's exactly what I'm saying.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, dear. I think this has gone beyond what we've our scope, our realm of this podcast so far.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

So it's okay for Michael Jack to exhume these.

[Nicole Parker]

These. Getting really upset.

[Cade]

It was John Landis.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

John Landis. R I P E. John Landis.

[Nicole Parker]

Eventually.

[Cade]

Ripe.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

John Landis to use these settlers from our beautiful town, treating them like other extras he would use later as. As, you know, play things. Then for me to just like take a look.

[Nicole Parker]

What is it that you want to do? What is it you want to do with them? You said, is it wrong for me and you haven't said it yet. What is it you want to do?

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Just to take a little bit of their.

[Nicole Parker]

Their. Their dead poop. Yes and yes. Put it in you. Why do you think that would be any better?

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Because I'm interested of how people lived.

[Nicole Parker]

I started. Honey, I don't know know that that's going to teach you that it's why.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

People do the paleo diet. Right.

[Doug]

Wouldn't it be white by now?

[Cade]

Kate, I have Doug.

[Nicole Parker]

No, babe, I would actually just say we. We said before. Stand down, Doug.

[Cade]

Stand down.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Are you thinking about How Dog. Dog poop used to be white.

[Nicole Parker]

It gets petrified and turns white.

[Cade]

We're the last place that has the white.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

It's amazing.

[Cade]

Dog.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

But I'm not interested in putting dog.

[Cade]

Cade, may I. I have to say two things to you.

[Nicole Parker]

Great.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Here we go. First of all, number one, while this.

[Cade]

May not appear sexual, it definitely appears intimate.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, I.

[Cade]

Number two.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

But I did say. Just. I want to hear number two.

[Cade]

Yes.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Just before you get to number two. It's just I said intimacy, as you are thinking of it. Which. That's what I did say that. And so I.

[Cade]

But you said it was not that.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Fair enough. Go ahead. Number two.

[Nicole Parker]

You really turned her around on that one.

[Cade]

Number two, although the. The. The. The process of one's bowels bladder voiding upon the moment of death.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Yeah.

[Cade]

They don't typically put it in an.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Urn like the Egyptians did with, like, their organs.

[Cade]

Right. Or bury it with the people in the graveyard.

[Nicole Parker]

Yes, that happens. And then it's taken care of. And then they're put.

[Cade]

That usually happens at the point of death, wherever they died. Unless they.

[Nicole Parker]

It's not like the second you put the dirt on them, they go, oh, no. And then everything comes out.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Well, the Egyptians, they would.

[Nicole Parker]

You.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

They would take their organs.

[Nicole Parker]

They would put.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

They would put it in an urn that you could have it. You know, as you crossed over once. They did the whole away your soul thing.

[Nicole Parker]

Ah, yes.

[Cade]

You know, also take into account this is how much the weighs.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Because when you're in heaven, you want to be made whole.

[Nicole Parker]

Yes, Right.

[Cade]

They put that right back in. And now I know we have a large Egyptian community here, but I don't.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Sydney falls. Diversity falls. Am I right?

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, that's really nice. No, you're not wrong.

[Cade]

We have all kinds of people here. It's a wonderful community.

[Nicole Parker]

Yeah. And it's called big Egypt.

[Cade]

It's called big Egypt because it's.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

They're so bigger than Egypt. It's called big Egypt. There's more Egyptians here than the country.

[Cade]

More people of Egyptian descent extent living in digby falls than there are in Egypt.

[Nicole Parker]

That's right. It's wonderful. It's wonderful.

[Cade]

It's wonderful.

[Nicole Parker]

I love it. It's one of the things I love about this town.

[Cade]

But I don't. I don't think that you're going to find what you're looking for in the cemetery. And I also think even if you're granted access by whoever holds the keys to the. To the cemetery in that land.

[Nicole Parker]

Yes.

[Cade]

I don't Think they're going to let you, especially after the John Lantis thing. I don't think they're going to let you dig up more bodies.

[Nicole Parker]

Bodies and their marquees.

[Cade]

And a lot of them went to Hollywood.

[Nicole Parker]

A lot of them went to Hollywood because, you know, it's hard to not chase that dream even in death.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

But isn't there something to of like act first and then apologize later? Isn't that something.

[Cade]

Oh, better to ask for forgiveness and for permission.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Yeah, sure.

[Cade]

I mean, that is a thing that.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

People say, but it is a lifestyle for some.

[Cade]

For some, yeah.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

And it sounds like you do have action access, Joan.

[Nicole Parker]

No, it's not. I was. Listen, we were taken on a tour one time and never to return again because it was. Again. They just.

[Cade]

Is that what they tell you?

[Nicole Parker]

And that's the thing. You can only visit the cemetery once.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Wow.

[Cade]

And you don't get a key like a Gramercy park situation.

[Nicole Parker]

No, no. It is a one time only thing. And Jebediah, who is the. No last name. Who is the chair. Go. That's it. Sorry.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Just like Cher.

[Nicole Parker]

Just like Cher, Yeah. I mean, honestly, he's an icon and he's been through a lot and his autobiography is amazing, but he has all the keys. And there are so. And you know, there are keys to each grave. That's why there are so many keys.

[Cade]

Right.

[Nicole Parker]

Because they don't want this to ever happen again. And he did tell us on the tour that this is a very special exemption that apparently the sellers that they did, except Zoom, had wished for that to happen. And it was very weird. They had actually somehow it was writ in a book where it said, shall the event ever come to pass that a celebratory musical festival may happen on these hallowed grounds? Dig me up. So not only a part of it.

[Cade]

They'Re not just saying it's okay. They're saying, do it.

[Nicole Parker]

They're saying, please.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Was there anything about microbiome or sort of any.

[Nicole Parker]

And see, I don't remember. I don't remember seeing any of that. Doesn't mean it. It doesn't mean it's there. But it also doesn't mean it's a good idea because I.

[Cade]

What is it that you think is going to happen?

[Nicole Parker]

That's a great question.

[Cade]

Yeah, we never got to this.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

I think.

[Nicole Parker]

I mean, do you think it's gonna do more than what normal practice of this gut biome exchange is? Do you think something extra is gonna happen? And what is it?

[Paul F. Tompkins]

I don't have any grandchildren. I always I don't have children.

[Nicole Parker]

What a place to start.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

So. So then I was like, let's. Let's think outside the box.

[Nicole Parker]

Wait, no, wait a minute. You're not talking about this getting. We're not talking about this as a fertility thing, are you?

[Paul F. Tompkins]

No, no, of course not. I'm beyond that. It's not. Not sexual? Well, it's not even for pleasure. It's. It's just I'm. I'm wondering if it would unlock something in me, sort of like the limitless pill, but coming from a different orifice.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, well, I mean, I would just do something like go to, like, a retreat or like go to, like, a yoga class. I feel like that's going to give you more sense of self than injecting old dead tissue from someone into your body.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Interesting. I guess I. I'm just a. I'm just curious. I'm curious, and I think that's what keeps me young. But I'm also interested in this idea that I have perhaps could keep me young as well.

[Cade]

So again.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, so you're thinking it's like a Holy Grail, sort of. Sort of fountain of youth situation?

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Yes.

[Cade]

Is that what you think?

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Cemetery. My El Dorado.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, okay.

[Cade]

Wow.

[Nicole Parker]

Wow.

[Cade]

So you feel this will. This will sort of halt or even reverse the aging process?

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Possibly.

[Cade]

Possibly.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Possibly.

[Nicole Parker]

She might be able to tell you the truth. There's nothing sexual about El Dorado.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Not sexual.

[Cade]

That's true. That's true. So that's one thing. That's possible, but it's possible. Right. Are you considering any other possibilities, like it could be fatal?

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Oh, yeah.

[Nicole Parker]

That's my concern. That's.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Not once have I thought that I.

[Nicole Parker]

Would listen to on this. Not once.

[Cade]

I can't guarantee you. I am a pharmacist.

[Nicole Parker]

That's right.

[Cade]

I can't guarantee you that it would be fatal, but I think the likelihood is high. High. Oh, yeah.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Why?

[Nicole Parker]

Because, well, I mean, famously dead bodies, aren't they. There's a lot of. There's a lot of things going on. The worms crawl in, the worms crawl out. Right.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

And there's back.

[Doug]

Can't change that. You can't debate that.

[Nicole Parker]

Which one? You can't up for debate worms? Doug is putting his foot down. Doug is putting his foot down.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

100 years ago, people didn't eat food with preservatives, okay? They had cleaner lifestyles. You know, there wasn't. They weren't eating Captain Crunch all the time.

[Cade]

That's true, but they were dying of dysentery.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

And if you Gave them one dysentery, though. That means there's probably a lot for me to.

[Cade]

Diseases and viruses were on the air, like feathers.

[Nicole Parker]

It's not sanitary. It's. It's.

[Cade]

There's nothing about this that's good.

[Nicole Parker]

Have you ever thought against the laws of nature?

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Look, we. Even with the. We're. We're gross about the grandmother putting the grandson's dookie up.

[Nicole Parker]

Okay, well, burnt was. To be fair, I already knew about it.

[Doug]

If you gave one medieval peasant.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Right. Like, so.

[Doug]

If you gave one medieval peasant a crunchberry.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Yeah. What would happen?

[Doug]

Explode. That's what they say.

[Cade]

Yeah.

[Nicole Parker]

You know who's they?

[Paul F. Tompkins]

I'm curious about that. I never followed.

[Nicole Parker]

He never follows up on the day. Who's they? Are they with us now?

[Doug]

No. No. I'm not losing my mind.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

We're on this. We're on the same Reddit.

[Nicole Parker]

Not what I meant it. They're on the same Reddit.

[Cade]

What's your handle on Reddit?

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, that's a good question.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Cade the spade.

[Nicole Parker]

Yes.

[Cade]

Does that sound familiar? Doug, what's your handle on Reddit? Doug?

[Doug]

Not Doug.

[Cade]

Okay. So are you. Are you sure you guys haven't crossed paths on it?

[Paul F. Tompkins]

It's possible. I'm on so many. So many. Yeah.

[Nicole Parker]

Doug is on Reddit all the. The time. That concerns me all the time.

[Doug]

Mainly on, like, home improvement.

[Nicole Parker]

Sure.

[Doug]

You know, subreddit stuff.

[Nicole Parker]

How to build a trash compactor in your home.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

But every Reddit is going to. It's going to start one way and it's going to end another.

[Nicole Parker]

Do devolve? Yeah, they really do.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

That's just, you know, that's just what it is.

[Cade]

Yeah.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

So I just want to. I don't know if you realize this, because I think you're grossed out by poop, and that's like, an issue for you.

[Cade]

It's not my favorite thing, but please continue.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

There is a Netflix documentary if you'd like to educate yourself on this.

[Nicole Parker]

Okay, I'll watch it. What is it?

[Paul F. Tompkins]

It's. It's about this whole thing now. It's not about now.

[Nicole Parker]

I'll just look up Netflix.

[Cade]

Is this the Tony Hinchcliffe Special?

[Paul F. Tompkins]

It's not. This is truly a documentary that Netflix paid for. So that means it's absolutely got to be good.

[Nicole Parker]

Yeah. It means it's got to be legit.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Probably isn't two episodes longer than it should be.

[Nicole Parker]

Probably not.

[Cade]

Probably not. Something could have just been 90 minutes at most.

[Nicole Parker]

That's right.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

I'm just saying. I lost my train of thought.

[Nicole Parker]

What's the documentary about, right? Yeah. What she's talking about putting it in your body. Yeah. The poop douches. Not from dead people. But that would be a great. Dead people on cbs, but the dead people, Tim Allen.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

That's, of course, sort of my sort of idea. That's kind of what I'm bringing to it. And the only. Only way I can know is to do it. Like I would never. You know what I mean? Like I wouldn't do it to somebody else. I wouldn't know on Doug, you know? So it's like, I'm not gonna sneak do. So it's like this is your.

[Nicole Parker]

Does your ex husband who you live with know about this? Does he know about this?

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Yes. And that's why he. Murray was worried. That's why he wanted.

[Nicole Parker]

Thank you, Murray.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

He was. He was like. Is he intellectual? No.

[Nicole Parker]

Well, he said this is sexual.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

He.

[Nicole Parker]

Yeah. Why does he say that?

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Because he's just riding my ass. He's just. Oh. There was a reason why we got divorced.

[Nicole Parker]

Wait a minute.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

I just. What?

[Nicole Parker]

Well, I mean, the fact that you're any. Anyways, there. There seems to be a lot of sexual sexuality in the things we choose to say.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Why we got divorced is that we weren't sexual anymore. So, you know, I mean, I just.

[Nicole Parker]

Keep thinking, is this something you think is going to, like, save your marriage? Maybe you just need a marriage counselor.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

I don't want to be married to him. I don't even want to live with him. But it's just. What I know.

[Cade]

Right?

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, I understand.

[Cade]

So this all came about because you're a history buff.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

I'm a history buff. I'm so interested how people lived. How did they walk? How did they breathe?

[Nicole Parker]

Specifically, murderers.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

How were they killed? Does that correlate to tiling, to roofing? To the gourds? And they're.

[Cade]

Okay.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Well, that.

[Cade]

That was something I said.

[Nicole Parker]

Well, wow. I mean, this one has me stumped because usually there's a suggestion we can make. In this case, my suggestion would be don't do that.

[Cade]

Yes.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

What I hear. I have gotten a lot of. Of information from you today, Joan.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

And what I'm understanding is, is that I need to take that super simple test that makes you a realtor. I need to.

[Cade]

Makes you one.

[Nicole Parker]

Yeah. It's not. I don't think I ever said it was super simple.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

No, but we all know that realtor tests are super simple and it takes five seconds to pass.

[Cade]

You know, Joan, I know there was a test.

[Nicole Parker]

There sure is.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

There's an exam. But, I mean, there's a realtor exam. Half of it is a eye test.

[Doug]

Seeing.

[Cade]

Being able to see is a big part of being a Realtor.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Big part.

[Nicole Parker]

There's feeling and identifying fabrics. That section, you have to say curb appeal.

[Cade]

Baking. You have to learn how to bake.

[Nicole Parker]

You have to bake cookies. It is very. It's. It's very, very intense. I'm telling you. They really put you through it.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Yeah. And so.

[Nicole Parker]

And then you do that.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

You do the oath, and then you get one visit to the cemetery.

[Nicole Parker]

Well, you know what? Listen. I know. And you say it like she's gonna try. There you go. She's saying it like she's not gonna take just one visit. Do not bother Jebediah, okay? He. No one knows how old he is, and no one knows when he's gonna die.

[Cade]

And your idea is to become a realtor?

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Yeah.

[Nicole Parker]

Go to the cemetery.

[Cade]

Get access to the cemetery and harvest as much corpse shit as you possibly can.

[Nicole Parker]

That sums it up.

[Cade]

I don't think you're gonna be able to do that.

[Nicole Parker]

I just think they're gonna stop you. See, I do think you will be stopped. I just. I mean, listen, live your life. Go for it. We need more. More Realtors in town. Although I don't think you're going to be doing anything with realty. Actually doing it just to get access to.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Have no interested. Interest in that. I.

[Cade]

Although it be good to have a job. And you sure would.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Well, I. On the side. On the side. I do a home organization.

[Nicole Parker]

Really.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Just on the side. It's like. That's just to make a little bit of money. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know.

[Cade]

What does that entail?

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Oh, that's just. You have cereal boxes. I throw away the box and then I put it in a plastic thing. I'm main. What I mainly do is I label. I love to label. I'm really into sort of stationary. I like to express myself through the pen choices that I do to label.

[Cade]

I like that because it does make you feel like you're living in a hospital, which is fun.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

That's right. All right.

[Nicole Parker]

Well, Kate. Okay. Yeah, no, you're right. To wrap this up.

[Cade]

Yeah. I mean, I don't know what to tell you other than don't do this.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Okay.

[Nicole Parker]

I think. Yeah. I do want. I do want that to be our strong message.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Questions.

[Nicole Parker]

And also just to listeners at home, don't do this. Three questions real quick. Real quick. Rapid fire.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Rapid fire. Jebediah, you don't know how old he is.

[Nicole Parker]

Do not could he be immortal? I have considered it.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Okay.

[Nicole Parker]

And I'm afraid to say that because I think it'll draw you even further to him, even 100%.

[Cade]

It will.

[Nicole Parker]

Yeah. Well, this is rapid fire. I didn't have any.

[Cade]

Question number two.

[Nicole Parker]

Okay.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Will you give me some of your poop?

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, she's pointing to Bert.

[Cade]

That's a flat no.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Okay, now it's to you, Joan. Same question.

[Nicole Parker]

No, Doug. Don't answer. Do not answer three questions. Doug is ready to give you his.

[Cade]

Yeah, and he just drank expired tomatoes, so I wouldn't.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

I don't want it. I don't want his.

[Nicole Parker]

All right, Kate, we wish you the best of luck.

[Cade]

We wish you the best of luck. And thank you for joining us today.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Thank you.

[Cade]

More when the Neighborhood Listen returns. Nicole.

[Nicole Parker]

What?

[Cade]

I hate telling you this.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh.

[Cade]

Vacation season is nearly upon us.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, I think that's great news.

[Cade]

Well, I'm glad you say that because this year I'm treating myself to the luxe upgrades that I deserve with Quince's high quality travel essentials at fair prices.

[Nicole Parker]

Are you talking about, like, lightweight European linen styles from $30, washable silk tops and comfy lounge sets with premium luggage options. Options. And stylish tote bags to carry it all?

[Cade]

Yeah.

[Nicole Parker]

You wanna know what the best part is?

[Cade]

Sure.

[Nicole Parker]

All Quince Items are priced 50 to 80% less than similar brands. By partnering directly with top factories, Quince cuts out the cost of the middle man and passes the savings on to us. And let me just tell you right now when we're gonna talk about an item I just got from them. It's a. It's a wonderful, literally transitional. Can wear it for any event. A great white T shirt, a blouse that buttons down. It's fantastic. I love it so much.

[Cade]

A shark on it.

[Nicole Parker]

It does not have a shark on it.

[Cade]

Oh, it's a white T shirt. That's great. I see. I myself treated myself with our discount to a cashmere hoodie.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Ooh.

[Cade]

I've never had anything this luxurious.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, I love that.

[Cade]

Most comfortable garment I own and I protect it with my life. I'm going to call everybody to action for your next trip. Treat yourself to the luxe upgrades you deserve from quints. Go to quints.com TNL for 300 because 65 days returns plus free shipping on your order. That's Q-U-I-N C E.com TNL to get free shipping and 365 day returns. Quints.com TNL Ryan Reynolds here from Mint Mobile.

[Nicole Parker]

I don't know if you knew this, but anyone can get the same premium wireless for 15amonth plan that I've been enjoying.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

It's not just for celebrities.

[Nicole Parker]

So do like I did and have one of your assistant's assistants switch switch you to Mint Mobile today. I'm told it's super easy to [e-mail] Switch upfront payment of 45 for 3 month plan equivalent to 15 per month required intro rate first 3 months only. Then full price plan options available, taxes and fees, extra fee, full [e-mail].

[Cade]

All right, first of all, don't use my name. Here it is. It's a coffin for the title. Choose be. No. And then I'm asking 1250 for it. That's $1250. And then for the description, just put. Yep. Now, if anybody sees the picture, I want you to know I'm not selling the space heater. I'm not selling the tiny fan. And I'm not selling the hospital to tub. Not selling the red curtain either. I need this coffin out of my living room. No.

[Nicole Parker]

Yep.

[Cade]

Coffin. And welcome back to the neighborhood. Listen.

[Nicole Parker]

How you doing, Burnt? You have. You are pale.

[Cade]

That was.

[Nicole Parker]

Yeah, that was.

[Cade]

All of that.

[Nicole Parker]

That was hard. Sorry about that.

[Cade]

Unsettling.

[Nicole Parker]

Yeah, it was.

[Cade]

I think that Kate is a strange person. And I don't think she should be allowed in that cemetery under any.

[Nicole Parker]

Definitely. I think I might even just go, you know, talk to Jebediah and just give him a heads up that I think you should. That she might be coming by.

[Cade]

How. How often do you have audiences with Jebediah? Like what?

[Nicole Parker]

Where?

[Cade]

Where what? What?

[Nicole Parker]

He's his brother.

[Cade]

Oh, okay.

[Nicole Parker]

How often do I have audience with.

[Cade]

Well, I mean, what do you call it? He seems like a very sort of, you know, mysterious figure.

[Nicole Parker]

Yeah, well, you definitely have to, like, if you want to meet with him, you have to go out there. You have to leave an offering. I mean, it could be anything, you know, it could be a Yo yo.

[Doug]

He's not picky about the offerings. He's incredible at yo yo.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, yes. Babe. Babe. How are you doing, by the way? I'm also concerned about. About you. Are you. What are you eating now? From the trash compactor. Get out of there.

[Doug]

It's.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, God. He's waiting through it.

[Doug]

Looking for this.

[Nicole Parker]

So many cans.

[Doug]

The problem is this place is it's closing in.

[Cade]

Oh.

[Doug]

So I gotta.

[Nicole Parker]

Of course it is. Oh, boy.

[Doug]

And it will crush you.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, boy.

[Cade]

You shouldn't be in there.

[Nicole Parker]

You shouldn't Also have it so that it could ever fully compact.

[Doug]

That'll powder you. Yeah.

[Cade]

You know. Yeah. It also shouldn't be a walk in compactor.

[Nicole Parker]

For sure. I think.

[Doug]

Why do you think the Death Star did it?

[Cade]

How much trash do they have at that Death Star?

[Nicole Parker]

No kidding. Right. And if you really look closely at it, you know that it was just people. I just throw some stuff in there. But if we really look closely at. It's like what is all that from? Where's that coming from?

[Cade]

How did a living thing get in there? I know it's. It's. It's not a planet. It's a man made thing.

[Nicole Parker]

Yeah. And to be honest, it really is out of the. For that first movie. I. This is probably going to get a lot of people upset. Just feels like an almost out of the universe sort of creature. Right. Almost from a different world. Like maybe not once you get through all of the films but that first one. Is there anything really like that? I don't know. I shouldn't be waiting in a Star wars because it's not my world.

[Cade]

There is.

[Nicole Parker]

Okay, fine. You know what? It's settled. I take it back.

[Doug]

Lucifer himself in the case.

[Cade]

That's right. The devil is there. A werewolf is there.

[Nicole Parker]

Ah, Lucifer himself. Oh my God.

[Cade]

But I mean this is also. There's also like a. Just a mouth that is in the desert.

[Nicole Parker]

Well, no, that happens later. Right, then it makes sense.

[Doug]

The Italian pronunciation.

[Nicole Parker]

All right, well, listen, we have one last post.

[Cade]

Yes.

[Nicole Parker]

And do you want to say about. Did you already talk about if you wanted descendant posts? Do you already do that?

[Cade]

I did.

[Nicole Parker]

Okay, great. Then we don't worry about it. Okay, so here's a picture. Here's a picture of a rainbow.

[Cade]

Very pretty.

[Nicole Parker]

These posts always kill me though.

[Cade]

It's a very tall rainbow.

[Nicole Parker]

It is a very tall rainbow. It doesn't look like it's an actual bow.

[Cade]

No.

[Nicole Parker]

Right. It's like rainbow column.

[Cade]

A column up to heaven.

[Nicole Parker]

And Loretta says, did anyone else see this beautiful rainbow? And that's always interesting because like this rainbow is almost gone. You know how you can see that? It's sort of like, yes, how's anyone going to see this in time? Run out. The entire skyline has changed.

[Cade]

Also, if you. What do you get out of. What do you.

[Nicole Parker]

What response do you want exactly?

[Cade]

Yes, I did.

[Nicole Parker]

I feel like I could more understand. I more could understand. Just here's a beautiful rainbow. You know, exactly as opposed. And I don't know why I get so worked up about this, but because this app is like, you know, so. So much a part of our life. I've developed a lot of little pet peeves about it.

[Cade]

Sure.

[Nicole Parker]

And this is one of them. Which is just why, you know. Why what? Like what you said. What are you expecting in response for this?

[Cade]

Because it's. I don't mind if someone wants to just share a pretty picture of nature.

[Nicole Parker]

Of course. Great. Love it.

[Cade]

But there always seems to be some sort of. You know what these people are hungry for. Engagement.

[Nicole Parker]

Or is it a little smug? Like, did anyone else see it? I saw it here. It was. I had eyes on it.

[Cade]

Pics. It did happen.

[Nicole Parker]

And Loretta, you're probably a lovely gal. So I'm really sorry. I don't want to go there. I'm not coming for Loretta.

[Cade]

She could be a disgusting monster.

[Nicole Parker]

Well, Brent, this episode is really. Is really.

[Cade]

Maybe I'm unsettled by Cade.

[Nicole Parker]

Yeah, I think so.

[Cade]

And also, Doug, eating expired food in a trash compactor that's built human sized.

[Doug]

You kind of gave to the tomatoes.

[Cade]

No, no, you don't.

[Nicole Parker]

No, we're not gonna do that.

[Cade]

You mustn't. This is like alienation with the expired milk all over again.

[Nicole Parker]

Don't never watch that show. Happy. No idea. It was a movie first.

[Cade]

It was a movie first.

[Nicole Parker]

One thing I know, it was a.

[Cade]

Movie first with Manny Patinkin and James Khan.

[Doug]

Did we talk about that on this show? No, they. And their heads look like Dutch Crunch bread.

[Cade]

That's right.

[Doug]

Which I got in San Francisco when we went for Sketch Fest.

[Cade]

Yes, that's right. And you share with us a picture of both the bread and the head.

[Doug]

And the head.

[Nicole Parker]

Yeah, the bread and the head. And were they similar?

[Doug]

Oh, yeah, they're very similar. Identical.

[Cade]

Yeah.

[Nicole Parker]

Well, gonna have to look it up pretty close.

[Cade]

Okay, well, that's it for us. Squeezed in another movie there.

[Nicole Parker]

We did.

[Cade]

We managed to in our non movie podcast. Thank you so much for listening, everyone.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, that's how. That's how Max Matt says it now.

[Cade]

Yeah, everyone.

[Nicole Parker]

They both say everyone.

[Cade]

They call a lot of house meetings.

[Nicole Parker]

Yeah. Everyone please come down here.

[Cade]

Come into the tv. All right, thank you all for listening. We'll be back next week with another episode. And until then, goodbye and bye.

[Nicole Parker]

All of the posts used in this episode were real. Only some geographical specifics have been changed.

[Cade]

The Neighborhood Listen is hosted and produced by me, Paul F. Tompkins and me.

[Doug]

Nicole Parker, and me, Brett Morris.

[Cade]

This episode's guest was played by Kulab Vilaisak. The Neighborhood Neighborhood Listen is a production of Comedy Bang Bang world.

[Nicole Parker]

Go to cbbworld.com to unlock the entire history of the show ad free, as well as brand new full length bonus room episodes exclusive to Maxima subscribers. Your support keeps the show.