Pulling a Karon with Angela Giarratana

Summary

The Neighborhood Listen: Pulling a Karon with Angela Giarratana

Release Date: May 27, 2025

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Introduction

In this episode of The Neighborhood Listen, hosts Burnt Millipede (Paul F. Tompkins), Joan Pedestrian (Nicole Parker), and Doug (Brett Morris) delve into a compelling post from a neighbor named Jaylene. The post highlights concerns about disrespectful teenagers twerking near her property, posing a potential threat to her dogs. This episode titled "Pulling a Karon with Angela Giarratana" brings to life the dynamics of community interactions and the challenges of neighborhood safety through improvisational storytelling and character interviews.

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Jaylene's Concern: Disrespectful Teenagers and Dog Safety

The episode kicks off with the hosts addressing a post by Jaylene in the Crime and Safety section of their neighborhood networking app. Jaylene expresses her frustration and fear regarding a group of teenagers engaging in disruptive behavior that jeopardizes her pit bull mix's safety. She narrates an incident where her dogs bark incessantly at teenagers twerking in the street, leading her to question whether she overreacted by confronting the parents.

Notable Quote:

Jaylene [28:10]: "Am I crazy for pulling over and speaking to the parents? Because they certainly looked at me like I was crazy."

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Introducing the Guest: Spin

To provide a fresh perspective, the hosts bring in a guest named Spin, portrayed by Angela Giarratana, who represents one of the teenagers involved in the situation. Spin's interactions are both humorous and revealing, offering insights into the teenage mindset and the unintended consequences of their actions.

Notable Quote:

Spin [30:12]: "I'm Spin."

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The Confrontation: Dogs, Twerking, and Miscommunication

The conversation unfolds with the hosts asking Spin to recount his side of the story. Spin explains that the dogs were the first to bark, leading him and his friends to respond in kind. The exchange highlights a cycle of miscommunication and escalating tensions between neighbors and youth.

Notable Quote:

Spin [30:47]: "I'll tell you, sir, right now. I respond to what I've been given."

As the dialogue progresses, Spin reveals that his participation in the twerking incident was an attempt to apologize, albeit in a misguided manner. The hosts navigate through Spin's humorous yet concerning behavior, shedding light on the generational gap and the complexities of neighborhood relations.

Notable Quote:

Spin [44:35]: "The twerk was an apology, really."

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Underlying Issues: Parenting and Community Dynamics

Throughout the episode, a recurring theme emerges around the role of parents in shaping their children's behavior. The hosts express concern over Spin being pressured into competitive activities by his father, likening it to unhealthy forms of gambling and emphasizing the lack of support for Spin's well-being.

Notable Quote:

Nicole [56:35]: "You can't equate a father's love with how much money he gets off you in this game. This is not okay."

The discussion underscores the importance of fostering positive communication and understanding between parents and children to prevent such conflicts from arising within the community.

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Humorous Interludes and Character Development

Interwoven with the serious undertones are moments of levity and improvisational comedy. The guest, Spin, exhibits exaggerated teenage traits, including incessant twerking and playful banter, which add a comedic layer to the episode. These interactions serve to engage listeners while still addressing the core issues at hand.

Notable Quote:

Spin [60:38]: "Bowerman, paves, Stone plates."

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Conclusion: Building a Safer and More Understanding Neighborhood

As the episode wraps up, the hosts reflect on the need for empathy and open dialogue within the community. They advocate for addressing conflicts constructively and understanding the perspectives of both adults and youth to cultivate a harmonious living environment.

Notable Quote:

Nicole [57:00]: "It's not okay that he's only equating a father's love with, you know, how much money he gets off you in this game. This is not okay."

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Final Thoughts

"Pulling a Karon with Angela Giarratana" offers a blend of humor and heartfelt discussion, encapsulating the essence of The Neighborhood Listen. By bringing forth real neighborhood concerns through engaging storytelling and character interactions, the episode encourages listeners to reflect on their own community dynamics and strive for better understanding and cooperation.

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Key Quotes with Timestamps:

• Jaylene [28:10]: "Am I crazy for pulling over and speaking to the parents? Because they certainly looked at me like I was crazy."
• Spin [30:12]: "I'm Spin."
• Spin [30:47]: "I'll tell you, sir, right now. I respond to what I've been given."
• Spin [44:35]: "The twerk was an apology, really."
• Nicole [56:35]: "You can't equate a father's love with how much money he gets off you in this game. This is not okay."
• Spin [60:38]: "Bowerman, paves, Stone plates."

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This comprehensive summary captures the essence of the episode, highlighting the main discussions, key interactions, and the blend of comedy with serious community issues. Listeners or those new to the podcast can gain a clear understanding of the episode's content and the insights shared by the hosts and guest.

Transcript

[Paul F. Tompkins]

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[Nicole Parker]

And I'm Nicole Parker.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

On this podcast, we improvise in character using real posts from a popular neighborhood networking website.

[Nicole Parker]

Occasionally, we change the names of some.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Streets and that's all you need to know to support the show and unlock the ad free archive as well as exclusive monthly episodes of the Bonus room. Go to cbbworld.com and sign up for a Maximus membership.

[Nicole Parker]

And now, please enjoy this episode of the Neighborhood.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Listen. Knock, knock.

[Nicole Parker]

Who's there?

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Your neighbor.

[Nicole Parker]

Good indignity fall. You're never alone. You've got the neighbor half AV and us burn and jode. From coyotes to male theft to weird things to sell.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

We'll cover it all and meet new neighbors as well.

[Nicole Parker]

We'll chat about any posts you're missing. So just tune in to the Neighborhood.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Listen. Welcome once more to the Neighborhood. Listen. This is the podcast that explores the neighborhood of Dignity Falls through the eyes of its residents. That includes me. My name. Well, it's burnt me a payday. I am the farmist in chief.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, it started going so well. It had a real Ryan Seacrest vibe. Well, because this is, you know, is very much American Idol, you know, and I was. I was.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

I was feeling good about it. I was really feeling.

[Nicole Parker]

What do you think happened? Let's, let's, let's. Let's look back at the tape.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Do you know what my trouble. What I think my trouble is, okay, is that sometimes I want to say all the words at the same time.

[Nicole Parker]

I so understand that. Listen, you. You know me. I. The wrong word comes out of my mouth all the time on this podcast. So I, I understand that's true. Oh, my gosh.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

I don't think that's true.

[Nicole Parker]

I don't think your memory's very Good, then. Well, because you certainly notice them in the moment when I do it.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

I don't think that's true. Oh, Joan, I wouldn't do that. I don't think I would.

[Nicole Parker]

You want to see other words at the same time. But also, sometimes we know that you're. You float above your body. You look back down, you see yourself talking.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

That's when I. When I start saying too many words.

[Nicole Parker]

Okay. But just not wanting to say them all at the same time.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Here's what. And I'm realizing it as we're talking about. Okay, I think because farm. Isist and I wanted to go to Farm in Chief.

[Nicole Parker]

You know what? Which, honestly, Farm in Chief I think is great. I think we should just coin the new term Farm in Chief.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

But I think people are going to see it in their minds as farm. And I don't like farming.

[Nicole Parker]

I don't think so. You know I don't like farms. I'm going to tell you. I know you don't. You've always been anti farm.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

I love farms.

[Nicole Parker]

You're anti farmer.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

I don't like farmers.

[Nicole Parker]

Farmers.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

They act like. I mean, farmers act like nobody could.

[Nicole Parker]

Do what you think they're smug?

[Paul F. Tompkins]

They're smug farmers and they're condescending. They like to tell you what time they get up in the morning.

[Nicole Parker]

Well, they make us all change the clocks for it. You know? I get it.

[Spin]

Exactly.

[Nicole Parker]

They really, really.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

I don't like right now. It's. It's late for too long. I don't like it.

[Nicole Parker]

Yes.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

I like when it gets dark early.

[Nicole Parker]

Well, and it does. We do also have. We're in. We're straight up in spring sprun right now. If you remember from last season, this is the season between spring and summer. It's. And pretty soon that. That. That video is going to circulate of Leslie Ugum singing It Sprung.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

That's right.

[Nicole Parker]

That's right. And. And the butts and bajibas and the hiss. Up on the hill. Up on the hill. That's right. So we're deep in Sprung, which of course causes terrible allergies due to cannibal type plants that will kill you and eat you.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Actually, plants that smell delicious. Nice. Oh, my God, they smell so beautiful. But they will. They are. They are meat eating.

[Nicole Parker]

They all kind of carnivorous.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

They're carnivores who are carnivorous.

[Nicole Parker]

That's right.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

And it's. It's certainly not a carnival.

[Nicole Parker]

The thing we didn't mention. Nope. The thing we didn't mention.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Thanks for backing me up.

[Nicole Parker]

The thing we didn't mention last year is that in Spru, the sun only is out for two hours. It's this weird thing. Justin Dignity Falls. So it is. It's not only are people. And that also makes it scary because you don't want to go out for a walk because then the plants are waiting, you know, you don't want to accidentally waiting.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Oh, they're licking their chops, those plants. They're like, now it's our time to shine. Do you remember Justin Dignity Falls? Who was the. He was the guy. He tried to make himself the mascot of Spruen.

[Nicole Parker]

Justin Dignity Falls.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

You mentioned it earlier.

[Nicole Parker]

He had his name legally changed to that.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Yes, yes, yes, yes. And he did. With no hyphen.

[Nicole Parker]

No hyphen. Just an umlaut over the.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

You and Justin.

[Nicole Parker]

Yes. Jursten Dignity Falls.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Jursten Dignity Falls.

[Nicole Parker]

Yes, I remember Justin.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

And he would. He would wear that tissue costume.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, God, yes.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

And then he got lost in the tissue in the tissue mountain.

[Nicole Parker]

Right. So as. Remember everybody. Everybody. Everybody in town. Everyone's nosers. I mean, it's just. If you're a new listener. If you're a new listener, what happens in Spruen is not only are you trying not to get eaten by the plants, but your sinuses are running wild. They are just running wild. And they're so. We didn't know what to do with all the tissue, so everyone was like, let's make a monument to it. So in the middle of old dig, they start making a mountain. And at the end they shellack it.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Yeah.

[Nicole Parker]

And then the kids climb it and it's fun. But before they shellac it gets sent.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Off to another country.

[Nicole Parker]

Right. I believe it is for kids around.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

The world to play on.

[Nicole Parker]

Yeah. But if you. If you try to hide in it or play in it before, it's like you absolutely can get lost. And we've lost several children to the tissue mountain.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

It's so. Oh, you know, you. And nobody wants to go in there because it's disgusting.

[Nicole Parker]

Nobody wants to go except for kids. They can't stay away from it.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Kids don't understand what disgusting is for a long time.

[Nicole Parker]

Absolutely. My kid, my. My boys still don't. And they're. And they're in their 20s. Yeah. I'm talking, of course, about my. My twin boys, Matt and Silencio and Silencio. Matt and Silencio still, you know, to this day. They don't. I don't know that they'll ever figure it out. But. I'm sorry, do you Think it's that.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

They haven't figured it out, or do you think that it's something that's wrong with.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, well, we know something's wrong with them. I mean, that's. And when I. And I say that, I say that meaning that, yes, they are pyromaniacs, possibly arsonists, but I don't really want to spend much time talking about that because they're really, really working very hard. But I want to get back. Back to what you were saying. You were talking about Jen.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Yeah.

[Nicole Parker]

And that he had a tissue costume. Yes. And it was similar. It was similar to the actual tissue mountain.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Yes.

[Nicole Parker]

And so he would just sort of.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Except googly eyes.

[Nicole Parker]

It did have googly eyes. Yes. And so then what's the story? He got. He got trapped in the tissue mountain. He was trying to take a picture in front of it.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Yes, he was. He was trying to do one of those videos of dogs jumping into a.

[Nicole Parker]

Pile of leaves, right? Yes, yes.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

And he got a big running start. First he has to gather. He. He. His little catchphrase was gather ye round.

[Nicole Parker]

Yes. I mean, which isn't really. I was like, people have said that before, you know, that's not anything.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Gather you round. Gather you round.

[Nicole Parker]

Yeah. That's not that out of the ordinary. You didn't. You didn't coin anything.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

No. And it's also. Are you a town crier?

[Nicole Parker]

Yeah. What do you want us to gather around?

[Paul F. Tompkins]

You're. You're a walking pile of tissues with googly eyes. Where does gather ye round come from?

[Nicole Parker]

But anyways, yeah, he got a big running start. He had a big running start.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

And then he, you know, it's like, are you. Are you filming? Are you filming? To his dumb friend? And then he got a big running start and he dove into the. The. The mountain of tissues. And I mean, not even a ripple.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, no, it's true.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

It just.

[Nicole Parker]

It was like. Yeah, like. Like jello. Like he was just hot in the mold. And now, of course. Now, of course, he's circulating. He's circulating that popular TikTok trend of like, that music that's just somber chords, like, boom, boom. It's like, little did he know this was the last time that he would jump into a pile of tissue.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

And little did he did know.

[Nicole Parker]

That's right. Nice try, Diddy. Anyways, so the boys. I do want to say that Matt and Silencio, they're doing a really good job as. As if. Again, if you've been listening, they. They've written a pilot. They want me to be in a Mr. Doubtfire. So I'm doing the gender bending.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Yes.

[Nicole Parker]

And we've been all single. We're doing all single cam shots, plus practical zoom, ins and out.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Yeah. Shaky cam.

[Nicole Parker]

Shaky cam. Steady cam.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

They don't understand that. They can. In the place where the shots are happening.

[Nicole Parker]

That's why the spike marks are everywhere.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Yeah.

[Nicole Parker]

And. And now what they want to do is. And you might like this. I mean, part of you will like. And Party won't like it. But. But I could say that about anything.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

That's true.

[Nicole Parker]

You know, that we. We've talked about the movie Mrs. Doubtfire. We definitely established that it was a run by Fruity, not a drive by Fruity, much to my shock, but that there's that montage.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

We talked about the mortadella effect.

[Nicole Parker]

It is the mortadella effect. What's. What? Can you remind me that what that.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Is again, the mortadella effect, is that you have a memory of all the cheeses being named different things.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, yes. Yes.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Yeah. And that mortadella was a cheese.

[Nicole Parker]

And it's not.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

It's not a cheese. It never was a cheese.

[Nicole Parker]

It's a meat.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

It's a meat.

[Nicole Parker]

That's right.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

It never was a gym.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, oh, right. Because you're from. You grew up in Medium Sis. Medium Sicily. That's right. So anyways, the montage that we talked about, you know, where you had an issue because one of the songs was, we understood dude looks a lady right when he's doing all the house.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

We understood that.

[Nicole Parker]

We understood that. We get that. That makes sense. But Walk Like a Man makes no sense.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Makes no sense. Because he's doing the opposite.

[Nicole Parker]

Right. And I. So I. They said, we want to do. We want to do a montage. I was like, make sure that they all make sense because Burnt will be upset. So we're doing well.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Don't hang it all on me.

[Nicole Parker]

Well, I just, you know, it should.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

It should be that the movie goers.

[Nicole Parker]

Like a little nod. You're going to be one of the moviegoers. Also, it's a limited series, not a movie.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

That's fair. I, I, I, I, I feel like.

[Nicole Parker]

What happened? Did you want to say all the words again?

[Paul F. Tompkins]

No, I, I just lost. I just flat out lost my point.

[Doug]

Natural woman.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Oh, that's Doug, our producer.

[Nicole Parker]

Hey, babe.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

That's.

[Nicole Parker]

Well, yeah, my husband.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Natural woman would absolutely make sense. Doug. Now, Doug, what room? We can't see you, of course. What room are you in today?

[Nicole Parker]

Also, I'm Joan Pedestrian, by the way. I didn't really introduce.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

I don't even know if I said my name is.

[Nicole Parker]

I said your name. I've said your name a couple times.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

It's true. It added the surname for context to narrow it down.

[Nicole Parker]

Doug's always in a different room that's being built. And which one are you in today, babe?

[Doug]

I'm actually outside. I'm in the driveway.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Oh, just in the driveway. Have you.

[Nicole Parker]

I feel like you've been there before. Yeah, well, I mean, there was the one.

[Doug]

Well, I've been to the driveway before.

[Nicole Parker]

He's been in the garage. He was restoring. He was restoring that 1998 Ford Explorer.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

That's right.

[Doug]

That was in the garage.

[Nicole Parker]

Right. So now you're in the driveway.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Yeah.

[Nicole Parker]

What are you doing out there? You're not building a. A room out there? I.

[Doug]

Well, I'm building a parking lot.

[Nicole Parker]

What? Why?

[Doug]

For. So I had this idea for the dignity error.

[Nicole Parker]

The dignity error?

[Doug]

Yeah. The baseball team.

[Nicole Parker]

Yes. Not to be confused with the Corkers. Who would. Who famously corks their bats?

[Paul F. Tompkins]

They corked their bats.

[Nicole Parker]

They were proud about it. That was very weird.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Yeah.

[Nicole Parker]

So the dignity errors, they would hit.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Home runs and then just shrug and then run the baseball. A big dramatic shrug. Like, what are you gonna do?

[Nicole Parker]

That's right.

[Doug]

The error is like the. The G League team. It's like the.

[Nicole Parker]

Like the movie.

[Doug]

Like the minor league.

[Nicole Parker]

The Geely team.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

G League.

[Nicole Parker]

Are you talking about. Wait, babe, are you seeing G. Lee. Like the Ben Affleck JLo movie? You're saying J League. G League. Okay.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

But, you know, it works because they're so bad. They're so bad.

[Nicole Parker]

It really does work. Really?

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Should be called the G. They're a terrible team. So it works to call the G league.

[Doug]

Oh, man.

[Nicole Parker]

We should call the Digby G leagues. Okay, so then why are you doing a parking lot for them?

[Doug]

Because, you know, the. We have parking meters on the. On the curb.

[Nicole Parker]

Yes.

[Doug]

I thought we rent out. I've always wanted a parking lot. To own and operate a parking lot. We rent out spaces.

[Nicole Parker]

If you were people going to. Like that. Who was not even employed to be in an empty parking lot.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Yes.

[Nicole Parker]

It was like every once in a while, people would come to see a game. I can't remember which, but she sat in that little. Little room.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

That's right. In the little booth.

[Nicole Parker]

I think this is what it's about. Doug has always been sort of charmed by those little tiny booths because it's like your own little space. Right.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

What'd you call it?

[Nicole Parker]

The keysmiths the keys. You know, the guys who. We can't say one hour photo anymore because that's not a thing in the.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

So it's not.

[Nicole Parker]

Himself.

[Doug]

So there's a few things going on here.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, boy.

[Doug]

We rent. We rent, you know, choice parking spots.

[Nicole Parker]

Choice, choice.

[Doug]

Because we're not that far, I mean, from the game.

[Nicole Parker]

I feel like we're almost far enough that it's going to be a little weird.

[Doug]

But traffic always.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

It's a long walk.

[Nicole Parker]

But it is true. People do end up parking on our street. They have. Especially on like when there's like an overflow. Okay, go on.

[Doug]

And I'm building a party van for like if people want to shuttle to the gate.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Building the party van from the ground. From the ground up. You're not modifying an existing vehicle.

[Nicole Parker]

Wait, you're literally hand craft customing building a car.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Are you starting with the tires?

[Nicole Parker]

I had the same question, Bert.

[Doug]

You have to start with the tires.

[Nicole Parker]

You have to. How do you get him to stay standing up? He's just trying to balance them. He's just constantly walking around to each one. Damn it. That one fell down.

[Doug]

You put the two boys hold two of them.

[Nicole Parker]

Jalapeno's so busy, babe. You got two boys on this.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

50.

[Nicole Parker]

Year old dog now? He's 50. Come on. He's. If anything, if a dog lives at 30, he might as well live to 50, I guess. So what do you have escrow doing? You can't even see.

[Doug]

Exactly. So he's just like a lump. He holds the tire, babe. That's very tire escrow. He loves it. It's warm.

[Nicole Parker]

Okay, so you're admitting to not building. You're admitting to not building the tires.

[Doug]

I'm not building the tires. Let's not be crazy.

[Nicole Parker]

You say it like. Yeah, that's on me. That's on me.

[Doug]

This is gonna be a great party van. Gary Glitter all day playing. Yeah.

[Nicole Parker]

Are you gonna be driving it?

[Doug]

Rock and roll. One and two, right?

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Can that be the last we talk about Gary Glitter?

[Nicole Parker]

Are you gonna be driving it?

[Doug]

Yeah.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, babe, I think that. I mean, first of all, it's gonna be insurance. You're gonna have drunk people. Do you have seat belts or is it going to be one of those Vegas things like a strip?

[Doug]

Drunk people, seatbelts, insurance, drunk people, seatbelts.

[Nicole Parker]

That's an example of saying all the words at once.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Yes, exactly.

[Nicole Parker]

He just. He doesn't have that filter. He can do it. No, he can do it.

[Doug]

And the keysmith booth in the corner.

[Nicole Parker]

You want the keysmith booth. I know you do. And you're gonna be playing like your tunes. I know you are. You're gonna have a little fan. You're gonna have it to the perfect temperature. I swear this is why he's doing it.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

What is the perfect temperature for the party van? For the party?

[Spin]

The booth.

[Doug]

The party van. Yes, you want it hot because you want to sell some.

[Nicole Parker]

Yes, you want it hot.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Cold drinks.

[Doug]

Cold drinks.

[Nicole Parker]

Yeah.

[Doug]

Right. And cold, cold burgers.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Oh, so it's not a cold burgers. Yeah.

[Doug]

Have you ever had the cold burgers at the ERAS games?

[Paul F. Tompkins]

No, I.

[Nicole Parker]

That's right. All of their concession stands are basically in the upside. Yes. Yes.

[Doug]

Yeah, it's pretty refreshing.

[Nicole Parker]

Cold dogs, flaming hot, icy.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

It's just a boiling. I said light it on fire.

[Nicole Parker]

Put flaming Cheetos in a blender, add some ice, a little dash of food.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Going and then they just. It's boiling hot and they still serve it in one of those.

[Nicole Parker]

Plastic straw. Always melts. Yeah, skip it. Just skip it. Skip the whole thing.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

You can't drink that.

[Nicole Parker]

Well. Okay, so it seems like the driveway should come first before you're building the car. But you're building the car first. Is that what happens?

[Doug]

Closing down the driveway? The car is on.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Oh, wow. So we're. It's very preliminary at this stage.

[Doug]

That's the beauty of a parking lot.

[Nicole Parker]

The driveway fits three cars. Surely. What's your plan for fitting more can.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Me before we get into that.

[Nicole Parker]

Okay.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

What's the beauty of the parking lot? Hosing it down.

[Nicole Parker]

Thank you for catching that, Bert.

[Doug]

Hosing it down is your only cost.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

We have to maintain. Cuz a parking lot can get dam.

[Nicole Parker]

It's not a parking lot yet also. So it's just the. It's just the driveway. Are you thinking you're only going to sell three spots?

[Doug]

No, I think we have room to grow.

[Nicole Parker]

What does that mean?

[Doug]

You take the grass down.

[Nicole Parker]

Take the grass down, Take it down.

[Doug]

Rip it down.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Take it down. With extreme prejudice.

[Nicole Parker]

Yes, President Gorbachev, take that grass down. I don't want to miss. I don't want to miss. Quote Reagan.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Ah, it's a mortadella effect.

[Nicole Parker]

Yes, I always call him President Gorbachev.

[Doug]

I thought mortadella died in jail. That was what I thought. We have room for at least two more spots.

[Nicole Parker]

This seems not necessary. So then. Wait a minute. Well, the party van is a spot and so those. Only the people. Those three cars are going to get in the party van.

[Doug]

Well, no, there's anyone can get in the party then.

[Nicole Parker]

I don't think that three spots necessitate.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Hold on.

[Nicole Parker]

Is this a T shack?

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Is this a walk in welcome party van?

[Doug]

The party van is a premium offering.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Oh, sure.

[Doug]

You can park and you can walk or you can get in the party van.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Right.

[Doug]

Or you can duplicate your keys.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Oh, so you are going to be.

[Doug]

You can do. You can't do all three.

[Nicole Parker]

Yeah, you can't do.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Yeah.

[Nicole Parker]

Wow.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

I thought you were drawing a hard.

[Nicole Parker]

Line and saying one.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

One. It's one or nothing.

[Nicole Parker]

Well, you've really thought this through. Babe.

[Doug]

Here's the thing. What if the dignity falls.

[Nicole Parker]

Yeah. Because you're on the street. Oh, is the. How are you? How. Here's the other thing. How.

[Doug]

Oh, that's the neighbor in his mech outfit.

[Nicole Parker]

In his mechanism.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Oh, no, not that guy. His mech outfit. He built like a big robotic suit. Yeah.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, that's right. That's right. And he makes a big deal about it. Yeah. This is Trevor.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Yeah.

[Nicole Parker]

And as you can see, he's doing lunges right now. Yeah, it takes forever when he does.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Lunges and it's not that big.

[Nicole Parker]

It's not.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Yeah. Well, he, he talked about it like, I'm gonna live inside this thing.

[Nicole Parker]

What's also weird is he walks three dogs with this. And so they're just sitting there waiting and they're just. Because he's so slow.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Yeah, yeah.

[Doug]

They're just trying to look one leg right now.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Yeah, it looks more like they're walking him.

[Nicole Parker]

Correct.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Like he's an elderly dog that they are walking. I love when you see somebody walking an elderly dog.

[Nicole Parker]

Me too.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Oh, I love it so much. That dog just ambling along and it's, it's, it's just like the dog really is out for a stroll.

[Nicole Parker]

I mean, that's how it is when I walk escrow, you know?

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Nicole Parker]

But okay, babe, well, how. How long we've been talking? I feel like we should play. Oh, I did want to just mention. I wanted to mention the songs in the montage. Okay. In the Mr. Doubtfire montage, we've got It's Raining Men. Right?

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Okay. Yes. Because.

[Nicole Parker]

Uh huh.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Because Mr. Doubtfire is a woman pretending to be a man.

[Nicole Parker]

That's right.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Right.

[Nicole Parker]

Okay, we've got Men, Men. Men. The theme song from Two and a Half Men.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Oh, great. Why not? Perfect.

[Doug]

Who's that by?

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Charlie Sheen, John Cryer. And that little. That little religious boy.

[Nicole Parker]

Is he super religious?

[Paul F. Tompkins]

He became super religious.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, gosh, what a shame.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

He condemned the show that he was on still maintain. He maintained a presence on it.

[Nicole Parker]

Okay, great.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Yeah. Got that paycheck.

[Nicole Parker]

And you'll be happy that I intercepted them at. Man, I feel like a woman. Right, because that's not correct. Yes, but that would be such a great one for Mrs. Doubtfire. But I don't think that song had been written yet.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

No, I don't think so.

[Nicole Parker]

Also, shy. Twain doesn't age. It's wild. You should look it up.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

I saw her recently on a country music award show. She looked terrific.

[Nicole Parker]

I didn't know that you were in the country.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

I'm not just into award shows, thanks to Gabby.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, and how is Gabby?

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Gabby's doing great.

[Nicole Parker]

Okay. You guys are doing great. All worked in together. Boxes are all unloaded.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

We have one last one.

[Nicole Parker]

It's been weeks.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

And. And the good news is that's silverware, which we do need.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, that was the last to come in.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Yes, Well, I got rid of my.

[Nicole Parker]

Silverware prematurely, I would say. Yes. Well, you didn't think there was a way to join your silverwares?

[Paul F. Tompkins]

No.

[Nicole Parker]

Hers. Marry your silverwares. Marry the ketchup at a deli.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

The. The. The styles of silverware were. Were too distinct. They would not have.

[Nicole Parker]

I need to hear about the silverware.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Well, Gabby's is their family heirlooms.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, goodness.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Beautiful.

[Nicole Parker]

Like this fine silver. Okay.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Yes, they're gorgeous.

[Doug]

Three or four points on the forks.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

They're four prongers. And. But there's also a smaller three prongers for like a kiss.

[Doug]

For a cocktail. For cocktail.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

No, we also. She has. She has them all. She has them all. The weird little clam oyster forks. All the things. Wow. Everything.

[Nicole Parker]

One of those loves. He loves them.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Things you use to carve the turkey.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, yes.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Yeah, yeah. No one knows.

[Nicole Parker]

There's no way to find out.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

And my silverware was all, of course, stuff that I made in shop class in high school.

[Nicole Parker]

So we're talking some bent forks and some, you know.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Well, I mean, just a little bent is a little more crude. I feel like that puts a judgment. A crude is fine.

[Nicole Parker]

Okay. Okay.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

No, they were lead. And then Gabby thought that maybe they weren't safe.

[Nicole Parker]

Yeah, I think so.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

So I got rid of them immediately. And then since then, we've just been eating with our hands and we unfortunately, really getting into it like we were.

[Nicole Parker]

There were foods that you don't buy plastic for. I mean, you just want to do that. You can buy those anywhere.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

The environment. But we. We. First we were eating just food. You eat with your hands, and then we were like. Then we saw the movie Killing of a Sacred Deer, and Barry Keogen eats spaghetti with his hands.

[Nicole Parker]

We're like, oh, let's try. I have not seen that.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Yeah. So we. We've been eating Chinese food with our hands. We've been eating just.

[Nicole Parker]

I mean, that's what the boys do. They're always eat. They always eat everything with their hands. Yeah, well, they're.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

That's a different.

[Nicole Parker]

It is. So wait, you did. You did do metal shop. That's always so interesting to me.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

I did do metal shop. Yeah. That's how I ended up loving nitro Bunny throwing cars.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, that makes so much sense. Well, anyways, I'm glad that you. I'm glad you got some nice stuff to eat with. Now that's not just your hands. Yes, I think that's very important.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

And metal shop was great. I made my dad's casket.

[Spin]

Oh.

[Nicole Parker]

Out of lead.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Not everything I made was out of lead. It was aluminum, which people really, the pallbearers really appreciate.

[Nicole Parker]

Sure. They did.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

All right, we should take a break.

[Nicole Parker]

Right? We definitely should.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Okay. We. There's so many things to talk about.

[Nicole Parker]

There's just so many things to talk about.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

All right, we will take a break. More with the neighbor listen. When the neighbor listen returns to you. Hi, it's Paul. Now, look, if you're constantly in the move or just tired of skipping meals, Huel has you covered. Huel spelled H U E L is this episode's sponsor. And their black edition, Ready to Drink.

[Doug]

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[Paul F. Tompkins]

It's a complete meal in one bottle with 35 grams of protein, 27 vitamins and minerals, high fiber, and low sugar. So you feel full, focused, and ready for your day. No prep, no cleanup, just grab and go. Huels already sold over 500 million meals around the world. Our world, planet Earth. And now it's your turn to try it. If you're from Earth, new customers get 15% off, plus a free [e-mail] when you use our code TNL. Don't miss out. Try it today. Like, look, for me, I'm running around all the time like a chicken with a head that has been removed. And a lot of times I forget to bring a lunch or I forget that lunch is a thing that I'm supposed to eat. And then I get real hungry and I start to crash. So Huell has helped me out so much because I can just grab one of these guys, take it with me in the car, and then when I'm feeling hungry, I drink it, then I'm not hungry no more. It's just that simple. And it tastes good. I'm not gonna lie. It tastes good like you ever have, like chocolate, a vanilla, strawberry, banana. Like these are the flavors I enjoy. And then I can go through my day without crashing hard. I'm about to call you to action. Get Huell today with this exclusive offer for new customers. 15% off plus a free gift with code [e-mail] TNL minimum $75 purchase. That's 15% plus a free gift for new customers using our exclusive code [e-mail] Please see the description for the terms and conditions. Skip the stress, not the nutrition. Try hewl today for complete nutrition.

[Spin]

Bottled.

[Nicole Parker]

Hello, it's hila here or hila I respond to both. I have Gucci sneakers for $600. White Gucci sneakers with original box and dust bag, size 10 used only ones. It's like a brand new. It's like a brand new. And my husband commented that they look like I I don't know what this means. Walter Goggins screaming. I guess there's some meme or Mimi out on the Internet that is just a picture of sneakers and some I guess, I guess they're seeing a man screaming when you look down at these open mouth sneakers and I don't know what they're talking about but all I can see now is a is an open mouthed, horrifying silent scream from my shoes and I, I can't put my feet in that. So please come get these. Walton. Walter Walton Goggles. Walter Goggles Goggle.

[Spin]

Walto Waldo Goggol.

[Nicole Parker]

I have no idea.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Please come get them. Welcome back to the Neighborhood Listen. And Joan, we have a guest.

[Nicole Parker]

Thank goodness.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

As always, what we do here on the Neighborhood Listen is we scour the neighborhap, the social networking application for neighborhoods and we look for interesting people to talk to via the posts. And sometimes it's the person who posted, sometimes it's the subject of the post. It could go either way.

[Nicole Parker]

Go either way.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

There are no either ways. Either or either way. But it cannot go neither way.

[Nicole Parker]

That's true, isn't it?

[Paul F. Tompkins]

It has to go either or either. And if you see a post that perhaps you think we should talk about, why don't you screenshot it and send it to [e-mail].

[Nicole Parker]

That was fantastic.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Thank. Thank you.

[Nicole Parker]

Welcome.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

And this was submitted by a listener named Michael Miller. Okay, thank you very much, Michael. And this is posted by someone named Jaylene in the Crime and safety. The name.

[Nicole Parker]

Yes. I like that name.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Because it reminds you of Jolene.

[Nicole Parker]

Of course it is. It is what it reminded me of.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Do you think there's a Jim Lean? Jolene, Jaylene and Jim Lean. If you expected boys and then you got three girls.

[Nicole Parker]

Jacqueline. It kind of worked. Yeah.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

John Lean.

[Nicole Parker]

Jill Lean.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Well, Jill is a woman's name.

[Nicole Parker]

Okay, just. Let's just read the post.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Jaylene writes. This is Jaylene's headline. Dogs to blame or disrespectful Teenagers. Jaylene goes on. I'm sitting in my home and hear my dogs barking like crazy outside. So I go to get them thinking they are barking at the neighbors behind us or next to us. Nope. They are barking at kids in the street, barking at them. Now my dogs are behind a fence. However, I have a pit bull mix and if she needed to, she could probably clear the fence. Now my dog would get into trouble or killed for teenagers in the street barking at them. Now I already have an ear infection and irritated, but I go to leave to go to urgent care. These same kids then jump out at the edge of the road and start twerking at me as I'm driving by. Am I craz for pulling over and speaking to the parents? Because they certainly looked at me like I was crazy. That eight plus kids are out of the middle of the street being downright disrespectful to neighbors and putting my dogs at risk. Idk. I guess I need my neighbors to help let me know if I pulled a caron k a r o n because I don't feel well or. These kids nowadays need to understand that disrespect shouldn't be tolerated or ignored. Wow. Well, that was Jaylene.

[Nicole Parker]

Uh huh. But we don't have Jaylene today.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

No. We have one of these so called alleged disrespectful teenagers.

[Nicole Parker]

Okay.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Barking right off the bat. Wow.

[Spin]

Wow.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh my goodness.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

I really did think there was a dog.

[Nicole Parker]

I 100 did. I can already understand what Jaylene is complaining about.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

That is good barking. Now please tell us your name.

[Spin]

Now please tell us your name.

[Nicole Parker]

Okay, that's disrespectful. She's just imitating you. Don't let it get to you. Don't let it get to you.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

All right, you know what? I'm not going to.

[Nicole Parker]

Okay, stop.

[Spin]

I'm Spin.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Spin. Stop.

[Nicole Parker]

I'm spin. Your name is Stop.

[Spin]

I'm Spin.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Up. I'm spin.

[Nicole Parker]

Okay, like what's up? All right. Okay. Don't let it get to me. Let it get to me. Okay.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

All right, now spin. Can you. Can you tell us.

[Spin]

Yeah.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Did you start barking at the dogs first, you and your friends, or did the dogs start barking at you first and then you were responding in kind?

[Spin]

I'll tell you, sir, right now. I respond to what I've been given.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Okay?

[Spin]

The dogs. That pit bull, that little scruff.

[Nicole Parker]

Okay.

[Spin]

Barks at me, so I believe I can bark back.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Okay.

[Nicole Parker]

Let me ask a few questions. How old are you?

[Spin]

And let me ask you a few questions.

[Nicole Parker]

Okay.

[Spin]

How old are you?

[Nicole Parker]

All right, well, that's not. That's not appropriate. Really?

[Spin]

Well, you asked me, so I think I could do it back to you.

[Nicole Parker]

All right. I am 45 years old. Okay. How old are you? I did it. How old are you?

[Paul F. Tompkins]

She's. She was in the woman's.

[Nicole Parker]

She's over 42.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Choir.

[Spin]

It looked.

[Nicole Parker]

I was. But strangely, I still can't get into the women's under 50 ensemble. So I don't know why. I don't know why. It is a real.

[Spin]

I'm sorry.

[Nicole Parker]

Why would you bring that up burnt? Because that really just. It sticks in my crawl.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

I felt like I wanted to. To give you some of your bona fetus to spin here.

[Nicole Parker]

Okay. Spin. I just. I'm just curious to know how old you are, just because I'm trying to get an idea if she's correct on that. Each. Okay, well, you know what? I have three kids, and they did this to me all the time. And. Yeah. Let me just tell you. Let me just tell you.

[Spin]

Sorry.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, okay.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

We are allowing you a plus.

[Nicole Parker]

I was about to make my point, but they stopped. Yeah. We're so close.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

We're trying to hear your side of the story.

[Nicole Parker]

You know what? I appreciate that.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Well, you felt bad.

[Nicole Parker]

Yeah, I felt bad. Listen, I have. This is not my first rodeo, okay? Oh, that's true, Mama. Three teenage kids.

[Spin]

Yeah. Your eye contact's crazy. I'm 14.

[Nicole Parker]

Okay, 14. And how many other kids were with you that day?

[Spin]

John, Michael, Sarah. Sarah junior. Sarah's older sister.

[Nicole Parker]

Who?

[Spin]

I. I don't know her name.

[Nicole Parker]

Okay.

[Spin]

Beth. Fidget, my best friend, and cappuccino.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Are Fidget and your best friend the same person.

[Nicole Parker]

So Fidget and Spin are friends. That's kind of sweet.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Cappuccino.

[Nicole Parker]

It's really sweet.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

So we're talking about nine kids.

[Nicole Parker]

Yeah.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Including you.

[Nicole Parker]

Yeah. Bird counted for you because I said, how many? And then you gave the name.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Jaylene said eight plus A plus. Yes.

[Nicole Parker]

And I wanted to see if she was correct. Now, here Let me ask the other question.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

It's kind of eight plus.

[Nicole Parker]

I know.

[Spin]

We give off. We look like there's eight, but maybe a little bit more.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Right.

[Nicole Parker]

Okay. And you're saying. You're claiming that the dog barked at you first?

[Spin]

Yeah.

[Nicole Parker]

What were you doing? What were you doing out on the street?

[Spin]

We play competitive soccer in the street. On the street?

[Paul F. Tompkins]

No, it's competitive, but all soccer is competitive.

[Nicole Parker]

Okay, but, Bert, maybe. Maybe we should have them.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Is it not.

[Nicole Parker]

Maybe we should have them detail this to you. What is competitive soccer?

[Spin]

It's a very competitive league.

[Nicole Parker]

Okay, can you give an example of what is competitive about it?

[Spin]

It's soccer with pushing.

[Nicole Parker]

Okay. This is what I was figuring. Something like that. Okay, so you're playing soccer with pushing in the street in this.

[Doug]

Sort of like, could play soccer all on one team.

[Nicole Parker]

That's my husband, Doug. You can't hear him? I mean, you can't see him.

[Spin]

I can't hear him, lady.

[Nicole Parker]

My name is Joan, and I made a mistake.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Take. Did you say you. You got all on one team? Yeah.

[Doug]

I mean, you could play, I guess, non competitive soccer where you're all working.

[Spin]

Together, you're all trying to get it in the.

[Nicole Parker]

To do what?

[Doug]

To get it in the goal.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

And is there a goalie in that instance, or. No?

[Nicole Parker]

That's a good question.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Does the goalie just step aside?

[Spin]

Well, the goalie would be on your team.

[Nicole Parker]

So the goalie makes a motion.

[Doug]

Yeah, the goalie is still there, but helps out. Yeah.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

With his hands.

[Doug]

Ushers it in.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Yeah.

[Nicole Parker]

And then gives you a compliment afterwards.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Doug, great. Chime in.

[Spin]

Yeah, I loved every minute of that.

[Nicole Parker]

So you. You're pushing each other and playing soccer, getting bored. What's happening? Oh, okay. All right.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

This is your story.

[Nicole Parker]

All right.

[Spin]

I've been falsely accused.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Well, exactly. We want to hear your story. So you're playing.

[Nicole Parker]

No, Quickly, here. This. I do this with my voice. Here's a Rubik's Cube. Just kind of. Just work on. Just put that in your hands.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Yeah.

[Nicole Parker]

Okay. And just. There you go.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Okay. Okay.

[Nicole Parker]

Yeah. Everything's fine. Okay, so you're playing your competitive. It sounds very dangerous to play a game like this in the middle of the streets.

[Spin]

But no one's ever driving around.

[Nicole Parker]

We all ever really.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Which street is it?

[Spin]

Reagan.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh. Oh.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Reagan is a very sleepy street. Much like the president himself, much like the man it is named for. He's very sleepy street.

[Nicole Parker]

He's very sleepy street. But everyone puts out jelly beans for people, which is nice.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

That's true. Everybody, they Put them out for people like Easter all year round.

[Spin]

No, but we're on that street. We're playing competitive soccer, and we're just trying to take it really seriously, so. Excuse me.

[Nicole Parker]

Okay.

[Spin]

Is something funny about my. My activity?

[Paul F. Tompkins]

No.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, no, not at all. Honestly, I find it charming. I mean, it's making me remember having my kids around the house.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

It's honestly the quietest Rubik's Cube.

[Nicole Parker]

Sure is. Well, that. It's on purpose. I. I found.

[Spin]

Yeah, it does feel, like, really, like, lubed up. Like what? Like I was gonna ask.

[Nicole Parker]

And I took out its heart. You took out its heart? Yeah. You don't know that it has, like.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Oh, you want to destroy a cube?

[Nicole Parker]

Yes.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Destroy a cube is a. Is a business.

[Nicole Parker]

It's like build a bear.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

But what they do is they take the heart out of a Rubik's cube.

[Nicole Parker]

That's right. I've always clicking and clacking, and my boys ran to it. I was like, I gotta do something about this. It's like declawing a Pete. Yeah.

[Spin]

So it's pretty quiet.

[Nicole Parker]

But anyway, so. So here's. Here's the next question, because this really caught my attention is that Jaylene mentions the parents there now. What were the parents doing there? Because this. To be honest. Let me. Let me just say. Spin. This sounded like. Thank you. This sounds like parents are standing right now. This sounds like behavior that teenagers are getting into without their parents around. Yeah. Your parents were all okay with you barking, twerking. I don't know. Can you take me through why they were there and what was going on?

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Twerking.

[Spin]

Yeah, we'll get to the twerking later.

[Nicole Parker]

Yes. I definitely want to get to the twerking.

[Spin]

So I'll. I'll be clear. My dad and his buddies. This is why I call it competitive soccer. Oh, they're putting money on our team?

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, no, they're g. They're gambling.

[Spin]

Yeah, they're betting on your game, but it makes us work harder. And. And I.

[Nicole Parker]

And I. I don't know how I feel about that.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

This.

[Nicole Parker]

Okay, so. So is it all just men? Was it all just dads then? No moms? Because that would make sense. Of course it's only dads. Yeah.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

So who else is betting on these? On these games? Is it all the dads?

[Nicole Parker]

Yeah, and before you ask, Doug. No, we're not gonna. It's not. Don't ask about if, like, people who aren't on Reagan street can get involved, because I know he's already thinking that's a Great idea.

[Spin]

No, we're trying to start a league.

[Nicole Parker]

Are you into it? Oh, boy.

[Doug]

I'm into jelly beans.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, I think he stopped listening after jelly beans.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

He is a new.

[Spin]

Oh, damn. Yeah.

[Nicole Parker]

Wait, so it's a bunch of dads.

[Spin]

Yeah, a bunch of dads. And we have like. It's kind of like fantasy football, but we're the fantasy.

[Nicole Parker]

Huh. Okay, well, you know.

[Spin]

You know what I mean? That's just what dad says.

[Nicole Parker]

So we.

[Spin]

So we play the game.

[Nicole Parker]

Okay.

[Spin]

And what's getting annoying.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh.

[Spin]

Is some of these dogs have something to say about us.

[Nicole Parker]

Well, sure. I mean, I think that's understandable. I'm sure it's very loud. Is it?

[Spin]

42 year old lady.

[Nicole Parker]

Well, thank you for the down. For the downgraded age. I'm so happy.

[Spin]

We're trying to be respectful and play a good game. And I can't focus on the ball when that little dog.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, wow.

[Spin]

Yapping away.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Okay, well, we'll ask you maybe not to. To swear.

[Nicole Parker]

It's okay. I mean, apparently it's okay for guests too, but not for me too. Doug doesn't like it. First, I just want to say a response of is it to something actually is very effective. I. I really feel like someone has made their point so. Well, I can't come back. I can't come back to it.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Even if you know for certain that you are right. Someone says, is it. It does force you for even a.

[Nicole Parker]

Moment just said it to double check. Just. I was just taken aback.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Yeah.

[Nicole Parker]

But I'm gonna push through. And you know what? I do think that it is disruptive to dogs because, you know, all dogs are doing, if they're in their yards, they're responding to sounds. And I imagine that this is a very loud game that you're playing. If it's competitive and your dads are.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Betting on it, and if there's as much shoving as you say.

[Nicole Parker]

Yeah, I.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

There's no way that it's silent.

[Nicole Parker]

Dogs think that they have.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

It's not as quiet as Rubik's Cube.

[Nicole Parker]

Sorry, that was the jumbo Rubik's Cube that just got. Oh, please.

[Spin]

Can I have that one?

[Nicole Parker]

Please, please. Yeah, well, the heart's in it still, but you. Here, it's too loud. Here, here, you can have this foam one. I have a foam cube. It's a foam Rubik's Cube. It's really fun.

[Spin]

Okay.

[Nicole Parker]

Okay. So basically, they think that maybe they have to defend a human out there. Dogs might be responding because they think someone's in trouble.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

They want to defend the house.

[Nicole Parker]

Yeah, that's right. Hopefully that makes sense. Sense.

[Spin]

Can I be vulnerable?

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Yeah, sure.

[Spin]

I love it. Vulnerable.

[Nicole Parker]

Yeah, be vulnerable.

[Spin]

I'm trying to tell them that there's no threat.

[Nicole Parker]

You're trying to tell the dogs?

[Spin]

Yeah.

[Nicole Parker]

So you're saying when you were barking back at the dog, you weren't trying to antagonize him, you were trying to calm him.

[Spin]

Trying to say, I'm trying to go weren't. I think they think we're hurting each other.

[Nicole Parker]

How? Can you give me an example of how you barked that?

[Spin]

Yeah.

[Nicole Parker]

And just to be clear for the listeners, there was also some hand motions, like knock it off or like all good or like safe. Yeah.

[Spin]

Just like a.

[Nicole Parker]

Which honestly sounds a lot like the umpires at the errors games, to be honest. That's exactly what they do when they.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Say they don't know. They're not paying attention. So they just make a noise and then they let everyone else interpret.

[Spin]

That's what I want to be when I grow up.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, that. You be very good at it. For the errors in the G league.

[Spin]

In the.

[Nicole Parker]

So wait, can I ask you this? You know that some dogs respond to actual English or you know, sort of or whatever culture. Whatever English. Actual words like sit and heal and good boy. Did you ever think of just saying, it's okay, good boy, it's okay. Calm down.

[Spin]

I tried to say shut it.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, well, that's not. That's.

[Spin]

Or I tried to say turn it down, little girl.

[Nicole Parker]

Okay, this is all to the dog.

[Spin]

Normal words. Not working lady.

[Nicole Parker]

So yeah, they're normal words. They are number words and maybe not a normal situation or scenario. So next. So is it. Oh, oh, they did it again. Okay, so wait a minute. Here we go. I. I want to know now. I want to get to the twerking only because I have a follow up question about it. So. So because I. I'm confused as to whether or not this was the first incident you remember seeing the. The Jaylene driving out away because as she says, she had an ear infection. And let me tell you. Have you ever had an ear infection? Oh, they're terrible.

[Spin]

Okay. I. I haven't as an adult. I used to when I was little.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Really?

[Nicole Parker]

As an adult, you're saying as an adult now?

[Spin]

Yeah, I mean As a 13 year old, I feel like pretty adult.

[Nicole Parker]

You're an adult as a 13 year old?

[Spin]

Well, I feel it.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Well, I thought you were 14.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, yeah, that's right. Spin did say 14.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Which is it?

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, wait a minute.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Are you even younger than 13? Shut it, spin.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

I'm gonna ask you a question. I'd like. I'd like a direct answer. Are you a tween? How'd you know? Well, I am a pharmacist, and so I, I. It's a thing where you become used to people's ages because of the maladies that they are getting prescriptions filled for. You're like, well, people that get this, they're usually this age.

[Nicole Parker]

Can you delete it? Can you delete it?

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Delete what? The video.

[Spin]

The file that says I'm 12.

[Nicole Parker]

No, we're not going to do that file. There's no another. It's fine.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

There's no file.

[Nicole Parker]

Spill Said there's no file. Spin.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

I think. I think spin meant the sound file, not like a.

[Nicole Parker]

At the pharmacy.

[Spin]

If there's any pharmacy files or the audio file or the MP3.

[Nicole Parker]

I. It's fine that you're 12. I'm glad you were honest, you know, and you don't have to. Oh, no, I've been starting to cry.

[Spin]

No, I'm not.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

There's big, fat tears rolling down.

[Nicole Parker]

Like. Honestly, they're moving in slow motion.

[Spin]

It's just a face I make when I'm about to dance Pants. About to twerk on you.

[Nicole Parker]

Don't.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

You will not twerk on us.

[Nicole Parker]

So. So when you. When she. When Jaylene left, you were barking at her. Why did you bark at her? Right. Doesn't she say that she was barked at?

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Yes.

[Nicole Parker]

Why did you bark at her?

[Spin]

I kind of got carried away.

[Nicole Parker]

Okay.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

And. And this. Are you sort of the leader of the pack with your. With your friends?

[Spin]

Yeah, me Fidget and cappuccino.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Okay.

[Spin]

And then the girls stand behind us, so.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, I don't know how I feel about that.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

But do they also start barking?

[Spin]

Yeah, the girls are kind of going like, meow.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Okay. That's not barking at all.

[Nicole Parker]

Nope. It's a meow.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

I would say that's meowing meow. Which is not mentioned. I guess it wasn't girls or cats.

[Spin]

And boys are dogs.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

No, that's true.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, well, let's not just say an absolute yes to that. And that seems a little bit.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

You know, I think people feel that way, though.

[Spin]

Do they?

[Nicole Parker]

They.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

I'm trying to support your point, Spin.

[Spin]

I, I, I've been acting insecure this whole time.

[Nicole Parker]

I know. It's okay. We're not trying to. We're. You're not in trouble. Okay. Let me just know that. Like, let me just. Yeah, right. So. And I think that's why kids sort of work get worked up like this when I think they're in trouble. You're not in trouble.

[Spin]

I think I thought the mic and I thought it was very official.

[Nicole Parker]

Of course. Of course. I mean, it is an official podcast.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Podcast is official.

[Nicole Parker]

It's very official.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

It's been certified.

[Nicole Parker]

It has been certified.

[Spin]

Okay.

[Nicole Parker]

By the board of podcasters.

[Spin]

Oh, that's so. That scares me, because I said I was 12.

[Nicole Parker]

It's okay. You're allowed to be on this podcast. Yes, but. But we're just trying to get to the bottom, and we would. Actually. The reason we bring people on like you is to sort of give us your perspective, you know, because in this. In this instance, it makes it sound like there was some wrongdoing on your end, but let's get your perspective. So when she came back, why did you twerk? This is an official podcast.

[Spin]

Yes.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

So it's official. You have to. You're on record.

[Spin]

Your honor, this is why.

[Nicole Parker]

You don't have to do that. You definitely don't have to do that.

[Spin]

Your honor, this is why I twerked when she came back.

[Nicole Parker]

He's swearing on a candle like it's a Bible. But anyways. Don't. Don't you have to do you don't.

[Spin]

Looks old.

[Nicole Parker]

It is. It's a very old candle, lady.

[Spin]

The twerk was an apology, really.

[Nicole Parker]

Okay, I'm gonna need to unpack.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Yeah, walk us through that.

[Spin]

She came back, and she looked really sad, and one of the girls said, maybe she's in pain.

[Nicole Parker]

Okay.

[Spin]

And she was driving back.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

She did have an ear infection.

[Nicole Parker]

She did.

[Spin]

She was driving kind of like with one hand on the wheel and the other hand.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, wow. She was holding on to her ear, holding her. Wow. And it looks like she was swerving pretty badly. The way that spin is. The way that spin is demonstrated.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Like someone driving in a movie.

[Spin]

Literally.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

It was like wheels going all over the place.

[Nicole Parker]

Yeah.

[Spin]

Oh, my God. My ear infection is moving and turning.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, wow. Okay. Yeah.

[Spin]

And so then I was like, for. Surely she'll understand if I dance. That's what I do when I feel a little out of control.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

And that the dancing specifically was twerking. Like, you. You weren't doing like, a sort of an. Sort of Alvin Ailey, you know, sort of interpretive thing.

[Nicole Parker]

You just straight up know Alvin Ailey. Do you know Alvin Ailey?

[Spin]

All I know is twerking.

[Nicole Parker]

Twerk.

[Spin]

That's the only dance I know. Show me another one. I've never seen it.

[Nicole Parker]

I think that'd be a great T shirt.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

You're all twerking.

[Nicole Parker]

All I know is torque. Twerking. No, Ailey.

[Spin]

My dad once was like, do a step. Touch. And I. And I kind of twerked as I stepped.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Okay, so you can't stop twerking. If there's any dancing involved, you have to include twerking.

[Nicole Parker]

I think, I think, I think that forspin dance is twerking. Yeah, that's what I'm getting.

[Spin]

I think dance is moving the ass up and down.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Down.

[Nicole Parker]

Okay.

[Spin]

Oh, I'm sorry. The B U T T. If I'm not allowed to cuss on this courtroom.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Will you just repeat that statement?

[Nicole Parker]

We're not in a courtroom.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Yeah, I want to try something. Repeat that statement.

[Spin]

I'm sorry.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

That's not.

[Spin]

Your honor, before that, the, the jerk wasn't the, the twerk was an apology.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Not, not that when you said that you believe that D. All dance is twerking.

[Spin]

Yeah, I believe all dance is twerking.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Is it okay?

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, I see what he's trying to do. Oh, it. See how it feels. See how it feels. I think that was important for him to hear that.

[Spin]

I'm 11.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Oh, no, you're getting younger. Spin. Spin, you absolutely should not be twerking at people.

[Nicole Parker]

You know what? It is crazy cuz as I'm looking down, Spin's legs are swinging from the. The stool. So honestly, I said it's big.

[Spin]

It's really tall.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

It's not that tall. So you're just, you're just a kid.

[Nicole Parker]

That's right.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

And you shouldn't be. I, I. We don't like to tell guests what they should and shouldn't be doing. Like to give advice, but.

[Nicole Parker]

Yes, you are.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

You're a young person and you're. You, you should be. This is a. You're on a bad path right now is what I would say.

[Nicole Parker]

Yeah, I think so. It sounds like. And you know what? Who I'm blaming right now are these dads. I just think they've put you in a real, real type of situation of like a fight where they're pitting their kids against each other on the street in a violent game.

[Spin]

To be honest, I, I just want to win so my dad can make big bucks and we can go to kfc. And I think those dogs, those dogs are in my face and I can't focus.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Well, now they're behind a fence.

[Spin]

Yes, I know, but they're like, they're so loud.

[Nicole Parker]

Okay, right it. I get it. But do you see, what we're trying to say is the bigger problem here is, is that. Can you tell me maybe some other things that you do at home with your dad? You know, is there other.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Other before we get into that, because I do want to know about the. About spins home life, but I want to know, did we. Did we establish what were the parents doing?

[Nicole Parker]

They were there on the game.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

So. But when. When. When Jaylene pulls over and talks to the parents, what does she say and what did they say in response?

[Spin]

So she.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

She has that already been established?

[Nicole Parker]

I think so. I think that's when she's saying, I don't think I want to be a Karen. And I know.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

I know she doesn't want to be a Karen. Right.

[Nicole Parker]

But I think that there's a moment. I think that there's a moment where there is a discussion of what the parents might have said. Or maybe right when she's talking to the parents, that's when the kids came over and started twerking.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

No, no, no. She.

[Nicole Parker]

Let's go back to the text.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

The kids are twerking. The sacred text. The kids are the kids. We have to respect the text. And I'm not here to interpret the text. I'm here to just say it mammoth style as it is written.

[Nicole Parker]

Please say mammoth style.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

But I had to go to leave to go to urgent care. These same kids then jump out of the. Jump out at the edge of the road and start twerking at me as I'm driving by. Am I crazy for pulling over and speaking to the parents? Because they certainly looked at me like I was crazy. Okay, now she's asking the people reading this, am I being a Karen?

[Nicole Parker]

I understand that. I understand that. Okay, so she doesn't talk about what she actually said.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

No. And what the parents said.

[Nicole Parker]

Okay, great.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

You know, the parents looked at her like she was crazy.

[Nicole Parker]

Then let's definitely let. Let's get to this. What was the conversation between Jaylen and the dads?

[Spin]

Well, I was too busy shaking my ass.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, okay.

[Spin]

But it did along the lines of she, like, pulled up and she was like, I'm being a caron. I don't mean to be a caron.

[Nicole Parker]

What accent is that?

[Spin]

That's my voice for women.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

I see. I see.

[Nicole Parker]

I'm going to encourage you to experiment a little bit with that. Keep an open mind that maybe that's not how all. Not all women.

[Spin]

This is my impression of you.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Watch some stand up.

[Spin]

I'm going to make you experiment on that. That's all women.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Oh, wow.

[Nicole Parker]

That was. That was not accurate.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

You should watch some 1980s stand up comedy done by men to get an idea of what women sound like.

[Nicole Parker]

No, bird. Birds. What are you doing? What are you doing? Doing? I'll look that up right now. No, no, no, please don't.

[Spin]

No, look that up right now. Okay. I'm gonna put it on my phone. I got so many tabs open. Okay. Great 1980s standup comedy. Thanks for that.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

You got.

[Nicole Parker]

Okay. Oh, she was like.

[Spin]

She was like. I don't mean to be a Carol.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, but.

[Spin]

My ear hurts. Get these kids off. They keep dancing on front of my car.

[Nicole Parker]

Okay, and then what did one of the dads say? Did anyone say anything?

[Spin]

He was like. My dad was like, sit up straight, Spin.

[Nicole Parker]

Sit up straight.

[Spin]

When I twerk, my chest goes down.

[Nicole Parker]

I see there's some real chest. So it does look like you're happening.

[Spin]

Yeah, no, it's. It's an unfortunate part of the dance that I look like a loser.

[Nicole Parker]

But it's weird that he wouldn't recognize that what you're doing is dancing, that he actually thinks you're sitting with bad posture.

[Spin]

He's like, stand up. I think. I think he wanted me to look good in front of the neighbors.

[Nicole Parker]

Can I ask, what does your dad do for a living?

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Coming. Great question.

[Nicole Parker]

Thank you.

[Spin]

Oh, it's a good question. Oh, I know. He goes on his computer.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, boy.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

He goes on his computer? Yeah. So he works from home?

[Spin]

I think so, yeah. Yeah. My mom says freelance graphic design is what he does.

[Nicole Parker]

Boy, every word in there concerns me.

[Spin]

Looks like a lot of Microsoft paint.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Wow.

[Nicole Parker]

Wow. And what does your mom do?

[Spin]

Oh, she's a congresswoman.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Wow.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, wait. What's your last name?

[Spin]

Spin Riker.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, wait. Do you know my mom?

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Have you ever met her?

[Nicole Parker]

I haven't, but. Well, you know, I showed her an apartment once, which I was a little weird. I was like, oh, is your family moving? She was like, know.

[Spin]

And why would she need to look for another.

[Nicole Parker]

I. I don't know, Spin. Maybe I shouldn't have told the story.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Maybe she was looking for a campaign office.

[Nicole Parker]

That's all it was. That's all it was. A campaign office.

[Spin]

Like in a residential neighborhood. Why would you want to put a campaign?

[Nicole Parker]

But I. I got to tell you, she smelled amazing. She smelled so good. Did she still smell good?

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Oh, I remember her slogan was, catch a whiff.

[Spin]

Oh, my mom never smells good anymore. She's too tired.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, yeah. She's a mom and a congresswoman. It's what are you supposed to do?

[Paul F. Tompkins]

A mom groman.

[Spin]

It's mostly me, my dad, and our neighbors just hanging out all the time.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, dear.

[Spin]

And my mom comes home and goes, clean it up.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, no. Clean it up sounds like another man. We really got to work on your woman voice.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

So. And what. So what, as Joan asked earlier, what do you and your dad do at home?

[Nicole Parker]

Yeah, I want to know about something other than this sort of.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Gambling.

[Nicole Parker]

Yeah.

[Spin]

Yeah, we're doing Death Race. We're doing drills. I'm going up and down. Yeah, I'm doing soccer drills.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Suicide.

[Spin]

Yeah, we're doing suicides.

[Nicole Parker]

We're doing.

[Spin]

I'm punting a lot in the house.

[Nicole Parker]

Okay.

[Spin]

Yeah, I want to. Here's the thing.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Star jumps, press ups. Damn.

[Spin]

Oh, wow.

[Nicole Parker]

I did not know that you knew so much about soccer. This is interesting. Where's this coming from?

[Paul F. Tompkins]

I only know things about British calisthenics. That's all I know. I don't really know what. Star jumps and probably press ups.

[Nicole Parker]

I see. And why is that?

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Jumping jacks and push ups.

[Nicole Parker]

Of course it is. Why is that?

[Paul F. Tompkins]

That was when I was. When I was little. There was an exercise show that was on tv, but it was dubbed.

[Nicole Parker]

I love hearing about your childhood bird. I just love it. It was dubbed in an English accent.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Yeah, it was an American. It was an American show, but it was dubbed over with an English accent.

[Spin]

Wait, why were you watching it with a. With an English dub?

[Paul F. Tompkins]

It might have been a vhs, now that I think about it, that might.

[Spin]

That someone dubbed over.

[Nicole Parker]

Yeah, so it's like a Richard Simmons video, but someone was like.

[Spin]

Yes, but someone came in and took his voice and said, instead of jumping jack, star jump.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Yes.

[Nicole Parker]

That is very bizarre. That's very bizarre.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

We're going to do 20 star jumps. Time for press ups. Down on the floor with you.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, he was a Rolling R's kind of Brit. Wow. Yeah, that's very profound. I think it was very standard Brit.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Rada trained.

[Spin]

If I lived with you guys, would.

[Nicole Parker]

You make me play SP Sports Spend. First of all, listen. No, no. See, this is where I put my. I'm gonna put that mom hat on. And I. I am very concerned because the fact that you like that before. That's a massive hat, lady.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Now, that was July. We gave you that for Mother's Day.

[Nicole Parker]

Yes. It's made of balloons. That's okay.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

I can't believe it's still inflated. That was years ago.

[Spin]

Well, lady, that's the biggest hat I've ever seen.

[Nicole Parker]

Well, it helps me Concentrate on being a mom.

[Spin]

It gives your hair so much static.

[Nicole Parker]

It helps me go to my mom palace. Okay, so here's the deal, Sven. I don't like what I'm hearing right now. You are. You are put in this sort of really violent sounding game that your parents. That your dad. I'm sorry, I'm not going to invol congress, mom. In this. That your dad is having you do. He's betting on you. And then at home, there's no break. He's having you train. You're doing unives, you're doing the star jumps, you're doing all of these things. And I think that that is unhealthy. And I think that that's not fair to someone as young, possibly younger than you've even said you are. As young as you.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

16.

[Nicole Parker]

And now we just jumped up. No, you can't just jump up.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

You can't go.

[Nicole Parker]

I think I said now spin.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

And you said, is it. That doesn't. You can't. You're not gonna get me with that.

[Nicole Parker]

I think the wheels are coming off on. Is it.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

The seams are starting to show.

[Nicole Parker]

These are coming off more than the ones in the driveway.

[Spin]

You couldn't mean that. Instead of standing up to my dad, I'm attacking everyone, including you two fine old people.

[Nicole Parker]

Wow. Aside from the final people part, I was really touched by that and those dogs. That was an amazing. An epiphany that you just had.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Tr Also, don't. We're not advising that you attack your dad.

[Nicole Parker]

No, I just.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

But what's going on is.

[Nicole Parker]

Look, just talk to him. Talk to him and say, I. I want to be a kid. I don't like doing this all the time.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

I ain't blind, and I don't like what I think I see.

[Nicole Parker]

I. You can't. It's not okay that he's only equating a father's love with, you know how much money he gets off you in this game. This is not okay.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

It's not okay.

[Spin]

And I'm taking it out on the dogs and that poor woman with an ear infection.

[Nicole Parker]

And that's not Jayleen's fault. That is right.

[Spin]

That you.

[Nicole Parker]

You're seeing. You're seeing through. You know what? Maybe it's because kids brains are so malleable, they can actually still learn. Because most of our adult guests, they never seem to have these kinds.

[Spin]

Taking this in like a.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

We had one. We had one guest.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, here's a sponge. Rubik's Cube. Have this one. It's very similar.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

It's different than the foam one.

[Nicole Parker]

Right. First of all, it's. This one's wet.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

It's sopping wet.

[Nicole Parker]

Whoa.

[Spin]

Is that dish soap on this thing?

[Nicole Parker]

It sure is. It makes love. Dish soap is.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Don't. Don't.

[Nicole Parker]

Yeah, don't lick it.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Don't lick. Spin. Don't lick. Don't lick.

[Nicole Parker]

Don't. Please stop. Stop. Don't lick it. Don't put any stars. No, no, no. Not supposed to do that. Keep it out of your pants and out of your mouth.

[Spin]

Be honest for the audio listener. I'm twerky.

[Nicole Parker]

Yes.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

You're not going to twerk your way.

[Doug]

Out of this one. Is that an apology?

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Was that an apology? Twerk.

[Spin]

Well, the voice of God. Is that your husband again?

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, yes, it is. That's Doug. Not God, but Doug.

[Spin]

I'm seven.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, no. Oh, no. Spin. Is seven.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Spin.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Darker than it really does.

[Nicole Parker]

It's amazing that you have the awareness. Don't get younger than seven.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Spin. Don't get younger than seven.

[Spin]

I promise you I won't.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Okay.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, thank God.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

You're big for your age.

[Nicole Parker]

You know, we always say to kids, wearing. We always say to kids, what is this?

[Spin]

Where'd you guys get these clothes?

[Paul F. Tompkins]

What are you talking about?

[Nicole Parker]

Yeah, Burnt is wearing his pharmacy in chief robe, which is standard.

[Spin]

I've never seen anything like it.

[Nicole Parker]

Well, and I'm just. I'm just wearing a robe.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

We're both. Okay, so fine. I'm wearing. Of course I'm wearing a velvet robe. That is the. The. My. My mantle of office.

[Nicole Parker]

We're both wearing robes. Mine.

[Spin]

That's why I'm asking. Why are you guys wearing these?

[Nicole Parker]

Mine is just regular terry cloth. It doesn't mean anything.

[Spin]

My mom wears those robes when she comes back from her campaign office.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, no. Oh, no.

[Spin]

Probably because she's working, right?

[Nicole Parker]

That's all it is. She's just working.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

She's working. She wants to relax.

[Nicole Parker]

She's just working. Honestly, I've been given so many slippers and robes by all the boys in my family. I just wear one every day just so that it gets some. You know, so that I feel like at least it. It was worth something.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

She lives in terry cloth.

[Nicole Parker]

I live in terry cloth. Live love terry cloth. So.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

So spin. I think at this point, I. I feel like we've. We've maybe gotten through to you a little bit and that you realize that you don't need to be playing soccer to support your father's gambling.

[Nicole Parker]

No, no.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

You. You probably see your mother more in clothes and less in terry cloth. If that happened. I also think maybe. Don't you think maybe you owe an apology to Jaylene and you could do that right here?

[Nicole Parker]

Ice burnt. I like that.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

That.

[Nicole Parker]

Because she probably listens. She probably is definitely not a fan. But we have listeners. Correct. But if we have listeners, but not fans.

[Spin]

Oh, but if she listens, how could she see my. My big old zunk going up and down?

[Paul F. Tompkins]

She doesn't.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, I thought you meant that's how I apologize. Oh, well, you know what? Maybe let's try this. Can you try this? I say repeat after me. I'm sorry.

[Spin]

Only if you give me another sponge.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, wow. That's all it's gonna take.

[Spin]

No Rubik's Cubes, just sponge.

[Nicole Parker]

No Rubik's cubes, just a sponge. Here is a sponge.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Keep the cues out of it.

[Nicole Parker]

I'm not trying to trick you with a cu.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

That is. Sometimes you'll have to do that with little kids. It's like, of course you can't give them a cube, so you can give them a huge.

[Nicole Parker]

Yeah, it's like giving them kids scissors.

[Spin]

Sick of these cuis.

[Nicole Parker]

All right.

[Spin]

Thank you for the sponsor.

[Nicole Parker]

All right, now repeat after me. I'm sorry.

[Spin]

I'm sorry.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, that was good. A little more volume next time. A little more volume. I'm sorry.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

No spin.

[Nicole Parker]

Now. That is.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

You're undermining the apology.

[Nicole Parker]

Yes.

[Spin]

I'm gonna put up undermining in one of my tabs later, after I look up 1980s stand up. What does undermining.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, I. I'm back.

[Spin]

I'm sorry.

[Nicole Parker]

I'm. To the court. Nope, nope. Jaylene. I'm sorry. Jaylene.

[Spin]

I'm sorry. Jaylene.

[Nicole Parker]

That is perfect. That's beautiful.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

And what are you sorry for?

[Spin]

Rubbing my. Rubbing my ass up on her Hyundai.

[Nicole Parker]

Okay. All right.

[Spin]

Barking at her dog.

[Nicole Parker]

Okay.

[Spin]

And being a part of something that my dad is starting that I don't want to be a part of.

[Nicole Parker]

Wow. This is. I mean, this is amazing. And you know what you're saying?

[Paul F. Tompkins]

It's amazing.

[Nicole Parker]

You're burnt. What is wrong with you? That always happens.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

We get good enough for you, old man.

[Nicole Parker]

Good enough for you. I'm a farm mustache. I'm a farmer. Honestly, you deserve this. You deserve this. You deserve this reaction.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

I mean, I'll take it.

[Nicole Parker]

I'm a shad pharmacist, man.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

A what?

[Nicole Parker]

I'm a chef.

[Spin]

A shad pharmacist man.

[Nicole Parker]

A shad. What's a shad? You're a shad oh, no. I got the shadow.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

If I look that up on Urban Dictionary and it's something obscene, you're in trouble.

[Spin]

I'll see you guys around.

[Doug]

I'm not a shad, am I?

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, he's gone.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Wow. He just ran out the door. Whoa. There you go.

[Nicole Parker]

Disappeared like rubble. Stiltskin.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Oh, he's barking out there.

[Doug]

I'm not. I didn't do anything.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, no. He's got Doug.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Give me your hose.

[Spin]

Hose down this sponge.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, no.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Okay, yeah.

[Doug]

All right.

[Nicole Parker]

Best of luck to you.

[Doug]

Spin, you want to ride home?

[Nicole Parker]

You're a good kid.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Oh, that's nice. Doug is offering Spin a ride.

[Nicole Parker]

That's good. Oh, in the party bus?

[Doug]

Absolutely.

[Nicole Parker]

It's not even built yet.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Spin's not a good kid. I don't know why you're lying.

[Nicole Parker]

I guess he's just driving him home in his car.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

When I hear Gary Glitter, it's time to go to a break. So we'll be back with more of the neighbor listen when the neighbor Listen returns. Hi, it's Kira. This is for free. It's 30th anniversary birthday napkins. It's a pack of napkins with cheers to 30 years, exclamation mark design. It's opened, but there are still at least 40 napkins inside. Now, these are nice. They're white. White napkins. Square goldish lettering and numbering if you count the 30s. This 30 knot spelled out it's a three zero. And there's a lot left over because the party didn't go as well as I thought it would go. For the first 30 years of my life, I was completely sober. I didn't have a drop to drink. I never touched a cigarette even. I think I swore twice. And then when I turned 30, I thought, let's have some fun. And then I got just nuts. I drank, I did drugs, I did all the sexes. I just did everything you could get addicted to. I was doing my strange addiction. Eating, couch filling and stuff. I mean, I did it all and it was not fun. So I was celebrating the end of 30 years of non sobriety. I'm 60 now, and I did so many 12 step programs. Like I didn't know there were that many. And I did them for all of my various addictions. And now I'm doing great. But I really did, because of the addictions, I lost a lot of friends. And so there were plenty of napkins left over. But the people that did come, of course, of course I cherish them. And you know, the other people, I would try to do the steps, and they would say, you've got to be kidding me, and slam a door in my face. Or they would return a letter with, you know, you've got to be kidding me written at the bottom one. One person sent me a telegram that said, you've got to be kidding me. So I really did burn some bridges, but learn my lesson. So if you need these napkins, they're free. Come and get them. I think everyone knows where I live. I made quite a spectacle of myself.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, my goodness. Well, I really hope that sweet little boy can sort of work out.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Sweet little boy.

[Nicole Parker]

Yes. I mean, I do feel comfortable half of that stuff. Half the time a kid is fighting, it's because they're hurting and stuff.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

I know, I know. And his home life sounds absolutely dreadful.

[Nicole Parker]

They're all horrible.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Yeah. But he was. What a little monster.

[Nicole Parker]

Did you really give him a ride home, babe?

[Doug]

Yeah, actually.

[Nicole Parker]

Wow.

[Doug]

He was twerking the whole time in the car. Well, I mean, it is a party van.

[Nicole Parker]

I know, but I thought you were building the party.

[Doug]

Well, I have the platform. It's not covered, so it's kind of like a convertible.

[Nicole Parker]

Wait, so you're just, like, on the flatbed of a truck?

[Paul F. Tompkins]

So. Okay, here's what I'm picturing. Okay. Yeah, I'm picturing. I'm picturing four wheels.

[Doug]

Yep.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Some sort of machinery.

[Nicole Parker]

Yes. Enough to make it go and to stand on.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

And to stand on. I'm picturing you standing with a steering wheel in your hands.

[Doug]

So far, so good.

[Nicole Parker]

And that's it, boy.

[Doug]

Yeah. And there's a pole. Yeah.

[Nicole Parker]

Yeah.

[Doug]

But it's, you know, dancing.

[Nicole Parker]

That's.

[Doug]

We don't.

[Nicole Parker]

Dancing.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Are we supposed to call it dancing pole? No.

[Doug]

I don't know. It all happens.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Noise you just made.

[Doug]

I don't know.

[Nicole Parker]

Well, that sounds. Sounds very unsafe.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

It truly does.

[Nicole Parker]

You happen to see, like, his dad.

[Doug]

His dad was. Was standing there waiting for us with arms folded.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Wow. I don't know where he gets off doing that.

[Nicole Parker]

Did you at least get some dad of the year?

[Paul F. Tompkins]

No.

[Nicole Parker]

Really?

[Doug]

I didn't know.

[Nicole Parker]

I know. That's why you really. That's why he really went. He wanted those jelly beans.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

They do put them out for people.

[Nicole Parker]

They do what?

[Paul F. Tompkins]

They do put them out for people.

[Nicole Parker]

Do put them out for people.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Well, we only have time for one more post show, and I think you have one for.

[Nicole Parker]

Yeah, I mean, this one is so. It's so short. Sometimes I just worry that people don't include enough detail for what it is that they really would like.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Absolutely.

[Nicole Parker]

You know, this is from Katrina. It says, hi, everybody. God bless of you. I have a room available for rent and Dignity Falls area. Contact me for more info. There's no pictures. There's nothing else. Wow. And I'm not sure she's going to get any takers. No, because you've given me nothing. I now also am wondering what's up with you because you say, God bless of you. That's not a thing.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Oh, you know what they say? That is newborn. Oh, God bless of you.

[Nicole Parker]

Right? God bless of you.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Yeah.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, that's right.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Everything they do, they're so Illinois.

[Nicole Parker]

God blessed.

[Doug]

They always say these United States.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

United States.

[Nicole Parker]

Or in these, our United States. They say that sometimes these are United.

[Doug]

States out of state.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Oh, they just suck. They just suck.

[Nicole Parker]

They really do. They really do.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Yeah. You know, when somebody offers a room for rent, it always conjures up something.

[Nicole Parker]

I think that's why you need to include a picture. Make us. Make us see her safe. Make us. Make us. Make us see what the yard looks like. Okay. This is not something creepy. Also, let us know specifically where it is.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

I mean, it's just like a two room domicile and it's you and whatever her name. Katrina.

[Nicole Parker]

Katrina. And I just don't like God blessing you. And I just don't like that. There's also just this sort of idea of like I'm doing none of the work. You have to call me if you want any more stuff.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Exactly.

[Nicole Parker]

And that's just not the way to go about it. This is not exactly your neighbors.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

It's not exactly the snowman. Mr. Policeman. I gave you all the clues.

[Nicole Parker]

It's not exactly the snowman. Mr. Policeman. Yeah. Do you remember the clues?

[Paul F. Tompkins]

That movie, when that movie came out.

[Nicole Parker]

Which movie? The Snowman.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

The Snowman. And it was about a serial killer called the Snowman.

[Nicole Parker]

No.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

And it was set in some Scandinavian country.

[Doug]

I never saw it.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

And the advertising campaign was like a crudely drawn snowman. No. And you know, a handwritten scroll saying Mr. Policeman, I gave you all the clues.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, I don't like that.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Apparently no one should watch. Should we do a watch log in the snow?

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, my God. Is it a European movie? Is it actually a scandal?

[Paul F. Tompkins]

It's Michael Fassbender is in it.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh, is he naked?

[Paul F. Tompkins]

I don't know.

[Nicole Parker]

I mean, Snowman with a gigantic penis.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

It's set during the winter, so probably not.

[Doug]

Does it have a carrot down down.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

There if he's the Snowman? Or maybe an aubergine.

[Nicole Parker]

Well, I mean, yeah.

[Doug]

Left you all the clues. Sounds like evidence to me.

[Nicole Parker]

Oh boy, you love evidence. You love evidence.

[Doug]

My interest.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

That's right. That tickles Doug's brain.

[Doug]

It sure does.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Here's about evidence. Are you actually laughing? Te. I've never heard that.

[Nicole Parker]

Never had come from my. I laugh before.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

I'm not trying to come for it. I just was so. You don't always.

[Nicole Parker]

Not intentional. It was not intentional. It tickled my brain and that's what that sounds like.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Do you know anyone who laughs?

[Doug]

Hahaha.

[Nicole Parker]

Wait, what's the question? Do you wonder who laughs?

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Do you know?

[Nicole Parker]

Do I know someone who laughs?

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Do you wonder who laughs? Hahaha. Cancer. Of course. It's Santa Claus.

[Nicole Parker]

No. Nope, that's not. Oh, that was so upsetting. That face you made. It was so unsantalike. Well, I don't have the beard on. Always giving like a. Like a. Just like the way that spin just giggled and escaped. Like Rumpelstiltskin. It was very, very like small Rumpelstiltskin now.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Not according to my girlfriend.

[Nicole Parker]

I know Gabby only hears Santa and I love that when she listens to you, she hears Christmas. Isn't that just lovely?

[Paul F. Tompkins]

It. I mean, not all of them. The time.

[Nicole Parker]

Okay.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Not whatever I say. It's only when I'm doing the Santa voice.

[Nicole Parker]

I understand. I was just trying to sort of make a. Make a figurative point. Okay, well, this is a really tense moment to end on.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

I swear I'm not trying to be 10. Okay, well, thank you for listening. If you would like to get bonus. I'm gonna say first. Okay, if you'd like to get ad free versions of the show.

[Nicole Parker]

Did you want to say everything at once again?

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Yeah, I did. I did. And. But because I think the bonus content is more exciting than ad free. You know what I mean? And I guess we have ads. Ads.

[Nicole Parker]

I guess we do.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

But if you'd like to get access to ad free episodes and bonus content, that's where we do our movie watch alongs. We have other podcasts that appear in the feed. Well, maybe we'll do a question and answer at some point.

[Nicole Parker]

Maybe we will.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Then you go to cbb world.com and check out on the Maximus tier and you get access to them as well as all the other shows on CBB World. I wish we knew what CBB stood for.

[Nicole Parker]

There's no way to find out.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

But there's a world of it.

[Nicole Parker]

There sure is.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

Yeah. So there you go. And we'll be back next week with another episode.

[Nicole Parker]

Until then, goodbye and bye. All of the posts used in this episode were real. Only some geographical specifics have been changed.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

The Neighborhood Listen is hosted and produced by me Paul F. Tompkins and me.

[Doug]

Nicole Parker and me Brett Morris.

[Paul F. Tompkins]

This episode's guest was played by Angela Jaratana. The Neighborhood Listen is a production of Comedy Bang Bang world.

[Nicole Parker]

Go to cbbworld.com to unlock the entire history of the show ad free as well as brand new full length bonus room episodes exclusive to Maximus subscribers. Your support keeps the show.