← The Neuro Experience
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- [00:00]
A
Sean Stevenson, let's first open up with understanding this missing piece to the longevity puzzle, which not many people are talking about. And that is the power of social relationships and how social relationships can have an impact on our longevity.
- [00:18]
B
Absolutely. So I'm a nutritionist. So for me, food was my big on ramp and I put so much stock into the value of food when it comes to longevity. And absolutely it plays a big part. Exercise plays a big part, Sleep plays a big. But the last few years of my research and the things that I've been working on is really related to the thing that is the tip of the spear because this impacts what I'm eating, this impacts my exercise habits, my sleep habits, my stress habits. It's the quality of our relationships. And some of the most remarkable studies ever done have affirmed this. And I'm just really working hard to get this message out there in a bigger way. Number one, Brigham Young University did a massive meta analysis. This was 148 studies, over 300,000 study participants. And they found that people who had healthy social relationships or warm social bonds had a 50% reduction in all cause mortality. All right, Said another way, they had a 50% increase in longevity versus the people who didn't have healthy supportive relationships. And these individuals, just this, this capacity stood out to the researchers because they looked at everything. They looked at quitting smoking, they looked at exercise, they looked at beating obesity. But relationship quality stood out far and away the most impactful thing. Now that was one of the catalysts for me to focus on this. But more recently I had a conversation with Dr. Robert Waldinger, friend and colleague out of Harvard, and he's the fourth director of the longest running longitudinal study on human longevity. All right, this has been going on for about 80 years. All right, this is remarkable in and of itself. And the same thing. And he's, he tends to be more skeptical, which I really can identify with, because when he got this baton passed to him, he didn't want it, he didn't believe the data. And so he really just scoured the data that they had collected and went to other institutions to affirm it because he couldn't believe that relationship quality stood out so much in longevity. And so what he discovered was that him and his research team and also again, for decades researchers have been compiling this data that the quality of our relationships is the number one determinant on how long you're going to live. All right? It stood out more than anything.
- [02:45]
A
That is insane.
- [02:46]
B
Above exercise, above exercise, above nutrition. Not to say that Those things don't matter. But. And he specifically used the term. That's where I got it earlier. I mentioned this. Warm social bonds. He actually sat right there and he said that to me. Warm social bonds.
- [03:00]
A
So is that romantic relationships? Is that what that means?
- [03:04]
B
No, this is. This is the benefit. Of course, that is one of the most notable in our minds when we think about relationships, we think about our intimate relationships, but it's community. And if you look at some of these glorified blue zones where people tend to live longer, this is the part that isn't talked about enough. You know, there's this big division that takes place when it comes to nutrition. Right. When it comes to these blue zones. But it's really the consistent piece across all these different blue zones is these individuals have really great relationships. Social connection, a sense of purpose. And we'll talk more about this. And me being me. I asked him, like, what is the mechanism? Why? Why? Okay, I get it. Relationships have a deep impact on our longevity. But why? And he said, based on the data and the best of his assessment, it's because of the impact that having healthy relationships has on stress. It's. Your ability to metabolize Stress is radically improved when you have people in your life who you can talk to, who you know have your back, who you can you feel, communicate with. Yes. Feel safe. A sense of certainty and safety in a world that is so uncertain, growingly uncertain. And when I say metabolize stress, we know that we were just talking about this, you and I, that we need stress. We need stress in order for us to grow and to develop and to thrive. Hormetic stressors are critical components of us getting better. But once we venture into chronic stress. Right. Acute stressors are important. Some of them can be dangerous. But once we get into a place where we've got so many stressors coming in, and what I like people to think about is your overall stress load. All right. So when I used to talk about stress, and even when I first was introduced to this concept, I've been in this field for 20 over 22 years now, which is crazy. But when I would hear about stress in relationship to whether I was working as a nutritionist or like strength and conditioning coach, talking about stress with clients. Right. So at the gym, somebody would come in. It's like, you know, I'm just stressed out, and it's usually related to work.
- [05:08]
A
Yeah.
- [05:09]
B
And so that's what I would cognitively link it to.
- [05:11]
A
Yeah.
- [05:12]
B
There's work stress. Absolutely. There's relationship stress. There is nutritional stress. Right. Certain things that we eat can be adding excessive stress to our bodies. Inflammation. There is emotional and mental stress, there is spiritual stress. You know, not feeling like you're connected, not feeling like you have a purpose and all of these things. There's exercise stress. Right. Exercise is a stressor, but it can be too stressful. And if you add in an already stressed individual and you add in training for a triathlon, chances are something has a much higher probability of breaking down. Right. So we want to be mindful of our growing overall stress load and to be able to process these things. It is with and through other people that is invaluable. And so that's what he shared as the primary mechanism was our ability to metabolize stress.
- [06:05]
A
Wow.
- [06:06]
B
And in doing so, and by the way, to put the icing on the cake when it comes to this stress conversation and why this matters for our longevity. So, and I talked about this years ago, but a really interesting study was published in jama, the Journal of the American Medical association, looking at physician visits and why do people go to the doctor, like why are people showing up with ailments and different issues? And they found that upwards of 80% of all physician visits have a strong stress related component. Upwards of 80%. All right, and this was years ago, so it's more stressful now.
- [06:41]
A
But if you look at the root cause of any chronic disease, you can relate it back to inflammation. Right. And so when you talk about stress, you're also talking about inflammation.
- [06:52]
B
Exactly, exactly. And he brought up that exact point as well. And relating stress to this growing kind of inflammatory cascade and a mismanagement of. When we look at this phenomenon, by the way, again, inflammation isn't bad in and of itself. We need inflammation to heal to, to, to grow and develop certain capacities as well. But when it becomes chronic. Right, so just for example, if we go and do a workout together, going to have a significant uptick in these inflammatory biomarkers. But our bodies are healing and responding and if we rest and recover, we're going to come back better, Right?
- [07:30]
A
Correct.
- [07:30]
B
But if we're just pouring gasoline onto that fire of inflammation and never really healing and processing, that's we're going to get into a lot of, a lot of degradation and disease very quickly. And so just to summarize this, investing in our relationships and this is one of the biggest problems and we can talk about how, how do we address this in our own lives? It's so valuable on so many levels. But you and I both went to university we're not taught about what qualifies, like how do you create a healthy relationship? We're just kind of thrust into this stuff in our, in our modern society where things are even more complicated with having healthy relationships. How do we do that? How do we cultivate healthy relationships? What are the ingredients? And most importantly, what are the things we need to be mindful of for us to avoid? And so again, this is a big topic with many pieces that we could dive into today.
- [08:26]
A
So I love this, okay. Because it's the unspoken science, right, as it relates to longevity. But what about also, I could only imagine that it comes down to the product of the people that you spend the most time with. And what if the people that you're spending time with are the ones going out and drinking a lot? Then that can also have an effect, an impact on your, on your longevity.
- [08:51]
B
Yeah, that point specifically. Yes. One of the things noted in the data was looking at those key elements that are seen, like why does our relationships impact our health so much and our longevity so much? The processing and metabolizing of stress was one component. And the other part was modeling. Right, modeling.
- [09:11]
A
Okay.
- [09:11]
B
And so having healthy modeling relationships was one of those things that really stood out. What if you don't have that right? Or what if the modeling that you're getting in your environment are for things that are detrimental? That's obviously going to pull away from your potential longevity. And so this is something where today more than ever, we have the ability to take control of this to some capacity. Because, you know, for myself growing up, I grew up in the inner City in St. Louis where, where we had the highest murder rate in the country at the time. And growing up with, you know, honestly, you know, drug dealers were my, my idols, you know, like, they had the cool cars, they had, you know, girls and all this kind of stuff. And, you know, I just aspire to be like them, you know, and the only way out that I had ever seen anybody make it out of this environment was like through athletics, for example. But this was incredibly rare. And so I didn't really have role models of like, success of being able to have healthy relationships. Like the only long term term healthy relationship that I had, which this might have added to my kind of patchwork quilt of who I am today, was my grandmother and my grandfather.
- [10:24]
A
Oh, wow.
- [10:24]
B
You know, and they were like madly in love. And just this entity, you know, they were this entity. You don't say one of their names really without, without the other one talking about them. Meemaw and Pop, Meemaw and Pop. And I had that imprint, but I didn't see that with my own parents. I didn't see that with anybody in my environment, like having healthy relationships, right? And so I'm going to model. And so when I find myself, like having girlfriends and things, like, I'm just modeling what's happening in my environment. And, you know, being able to just understand today, you have the ability on your phone, right here in your hand to tune into positive examples of anything that you want to experience or be connected to, right? We didn't have this growing up. Like, we might get little. I'll give an example. Like we might get little inputs, which is kind of messed up, but I'm going to share it. When I went to college, initially I went pre med, into the pre med program because of a television show, watching the Cosby show, which is kind of messed up at this point. You know, Bill Cosby kind of messed it up. But he was like the. He was like the TV dad, right? He was a doctor, his wife was a lawyer. They had a great family. You know, it's funny, they ate together. They, you know, had all these great experiences. And I was like, I should do that. I should be a doctor like him, right? And but little did I know, or little did I want to acknowledge, I hated science at the time. I hated it, but it was because of the way that I was taught. And this is part of my mission today and what we can tie this back to as well with an environment and getting these environmental inputs. When I was taking biology in my university classes, we were not taught that when we're studying the cell, if we're talking about a cell from the human body, we're looking at parts that are made from food, right? That mitochondria is made from your meals. The nucleus is made from the nutrients you eat, right? And so there was this disconnect. Like, I didn't think I had any power over what my cells are doing. And so I had this auditorium style, like nutritional science class. And. And we were just talking about these things that were almost unimportant, all right? And you know, just some of the basic stuff, like if you want to lose weight, you gotta expend more calories than you take in. Simple equation, right?
- [12:45]
A
Very simple.
- [12:46]
B
And we're not looking at like, what about the quality of the calories that you're consuming? What about the quality of the movement that you're doing and all these other inputs? And also, you know, I remember my teacher sharing, you know, everybody when you work with clients, make sure that they. Everybody takes a multivitamin. And we weren't taught that there's multiple forms of vitamin D. There's multiple forms of, you know, vitamin A, there's multiple forms of vitamin B12. Right. There's multiple forms of vitamin D. The list goes on and on. Am I getting what I'm looking for in this superficial supplement you're telling us to take? Right. And so, you know, what eventually brought me back to science was the connection between how what we're studying relates to me as a person.
- [13:24]
A
Yeah.
- [13:25]
B
And that's what I strive to do in my work. And I know you do this as well, and that's why we connect so well.
- [13:29]
A
Yeah. I think, you know, all of this is tying back to a phenomenon that happens as people age. Right. And this happens. Have you ever read, like, about how if your spouse dies, you know, when you're in your late 80s, 90s, then it's not long until you also pass away after that. And it's. It's scary because social isolation, which is what we saw a lot of, was increasing depression rates, especially when we went through the pandemic. And we see that a lot when, you know, even in. Because I always refer back to Alzheimer's disease, that's my primary area of research. And we see a lot of this social isolation when people do have this disease and they. They become recluse and, you know, kind of like they just want to be in their bedroom staring at the wall. And that's actually aiding in, you know, and accelerating their rate of the disease because of the fact that they are not socializing. And I thought it was mere. The mere fact that they're not, you know, working their brain as hard, but you're just proving more and more that it's probably about the metabolizing of stress.
- [14:36]
B
Yeah. Our brains are sinking out right now because I was going to share that exact point when talking about my grandparents.
- [14:42]
A
Yeah.
- [14:42]
B
Because after my grandfather passed away prematurely, heart disease at a pretty young age, my grandmother, she left not too long after that. And I say, you know, she really died from a broken heart. And, you know, just having that example with them, you know, again, it points to what. What are we attuned to? What are we looking for? And today, more than ever again, if you don't have examples of healthy relationships, you can proactively tune into them. Your. Your social media feed can be filled with Beyonce or no, no disrespect. Okay. Or, you know, little whatever, little baby or whatever. Or you Know, John, right, whatever. Or it could be filled with, in all the gossip in the world or it can be filled with examples of healthy relationships, of family fitness, of, you know, nutrition tips, things that empower you, make you feel good, you know, so you can curate the information that you're taking in. I think one of the most valuable things is what we're doing right now. You know, people get to learn from some of the best people in the world in a respective field by pushing play. This was something that didn't exist. There was a time when, you know, the people that were really in the know, they were just isolated, uber valuable. Only certain people got access to that. And now everybody has access at some capacity. And so just being more intentional in who you're spending your time with virtually. But this also speaks to one of the things that you got coming up here is a live event, you know, getting out of your environment and going to live events with like minded people and community. And you know, you know, this is an opportunity that we have today to proactively put ourselves around that stuff. But it starts with the awareness that you can. And that's something that I didn't have. I didn't know. And I shared this with you in our earlier conversation. I didn't get on an airplane till I was 25. I didn't know that I could. I didn't know that I even want. I didn't even have the awareness that I wanted to go somewhere else outside of St. Louis. And it was thanks to an association. You know, my girlfriend who's now my wife, we've been together for 20 years, she's from Kenya, you know, and so she already, she already is coming here, like awesome international stuff. And so she exposed me to that and changed my paradigm.
- [17:02]
A
Yeah.
- [17:03]
B
You know, and that's so good for the brain itself as we talked about.
- [17:06]
A
One of the hardest things for me growing up and even today is being able to let go of relationships that don't no longer serve me. I, I was brought up in a very big community. I'm Greek Cypriot. And it was, you know, kind of my friends were chosen for me until I got a bit older. And I've still got some of those friends and kind of feels like an obligation.
- [17:31]
B
Right.
- [17:31]
A
And it's like my time is becoming so finite and I was thinking about, you know, my best friends and one of my closest friends in New York. So I live in Manhattan in the thick of it. And she did too. And she got married and had a baby and she moved to Long Island City and she's, you know, she's got a six month old baby. She's asking, can you come over, can you come over? And it's, and it's very much out of my way but because she's one of my, my best friends and I believe you need to invest time and energy into your closest friends. So of course I go there and it's very different to the way we used to hang out, but that doesn't matter. But I think that that's also a beautiful part of it as well, putting the time in to doing it, but also being okay with letting people who are no longer serving your trajectory in life and your goals and not, not putting that as a burden on you. Because I did that for so long, I thought, well, this person's been in my life for 20 years and we have nothing in common anymore. We don't even live in the same country and I don't have any time for this. It's, it's being okay with that too.
- [18:40]
B
Yeah. There's, as this great saying goes, people are in your life for a reason, for a season or for a lifetime. Right. And having the awareness to know the difference and understanding, you know, there's certain people that in my life, it doesn't matter how much time has gone by, we might not talk for two years, as soon as we get together, instant connection, right. It's just our souls are just, you know, just connected like that. And then there are people who, you know, if you're not around, like your lives just go in these different directions and that's okay as well, you know. But the most important part is being proactive in investing in the relationships that are most important to you. And again, today more than ever, we have to be intentional because so many things are vying for your attention, for your time. Whereas this was a lot of the time that we spent on our phone, which again, I've already shared the value, potential value with using your phone. But we were spending that time in contemplation with self or with other people. You know, there was a time when we were excited when the phone rang at the house. Like, who's calling? You know, everybody's picking up, racing to the phone. Who is it? Hello?
- [19:50]
A
Yeah, hello.
- [19:51]
B
Now like you check, you're like, who is this? I don't know, this number is not familiar. Or like, I don't want to talk to this person right now. I'll call them back later. Like we have all of this stuff because we have been just overwhelmed with access, right? And so we got to be mindful of that. And I want to share this. This was a third part. So we talked about the impact that it has on metabolizing stress. We talked a little bit about the impact that it has on modeling. Right. And the importance of choosing healthy models for yourself because you are being influenced. You know, the science around mirror neurons is still. It's not, it's not as solid as some researchers might, might lead us to believe, but it is a very powerful aspect of the human brain. We are recording this data and there is an aspect of us that's simulating what we are experiencing. So as I'm watching you right now, as you're watching me, there's parts of you that's simulating you being in this position. This is why I think a great example of this is when we're watching Mission Impossible or something like Tom, like we can feel the feeling when we're watching sports. There's this emotional investment. We feel so connected to the movements and to the activity. And it's because there's parts of us that feel like we are a part of it. And you know, with that being said, the modeling is important. But one other thing I wanted to share and I pulled this up just for this conversation, is that our social relationships, another part of this longevity equation is that they give us meaning and purpose. And this study was conducted by researchers at Boston University School of Public Health, and they found that having a purpose lowers the risk of all cause mortality, regardless of race, gender, ethnicity and several other factors. But here's something interesting. They found that the effects were even more pronounced among women. Could this be why women part of the equation, why women live longer? You know, it's just like these are these interesting inputs and there's other.
- [21:54]
A
And does it show why?
- [21:56]
B
No, it didn't. It didn't dig into exactly why that is. It's just one of those things that stood out in the research that, you know, actually women who had a strong sense of purpose, you know, just, they tended to live longer. And so just for us to be mindful of all these pieces and for us to engage in this proactively is super important. And again, there isn't a cookie. This is one of the big takeaways from today. There isn't a cookie cutter way to go about this. We've got to find out the formula that works best for us. And what I want to provide people with today is one of the highest leverage ways of utilizing this science in something that we do all the time, that we Enjoy doing, which is eating food.
- [22:41]
A
Yes.
- [22:42]
B
All right.
- [22:42]
A
Oh my gosh, I'm so excited about this. I've, I've, I've fallen in love with the whole bringing people over now and making beautiful dinners and, and being like socially around food. I love this. Let's go.
- [22:56]
B
This is something in your culture is a big thing.
- [22:58]
A
Yes.
- [22:59]
B
You know, I'm great. But this is something that humans have been doing for so long. We've all participated in this process, the procurement of food. I think a luau is a great example because people have an idea what that looks like, you know, the procurement of the food. Right. So hunting and gathering, the food preparation, the sitting down and eating together and sharing of stories. Right. This is something that humans were doing for thousands of years. And this is a time, it's a, it's a unifier. Right. It's a time to pass on traditions. It's a time of modeling. It's a time of, you know, celebration of being together. And that has been pulled out from under, out from under us like that in just a couple of generations. As of now, only 30%, approximately 30% of families eat together on a regular basis.
- [23:50]
A
Now.
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B
It's on the endangered species list. When this was just a normal part, even when we went to more nuclear families and smaller families, we still live close to extended relatives, which even that is rare today. But families are still like sitting down at the dinner table and eating dinner. Right. You quote, make it home for dinner. And so my mission was to find out what happens when we don't do that and what happens when we do do that. So one of the things that we uncovered was there's a great body of research that was gathered by some scientists at Harvard and they found we're going to start kind of just small and then we'll go bigger. They found that families that eat together on a regular basis had dramatically higher intake of essential vitamins and minerals and macronutrients that help to support greater health outcomes for the study participants. And on the other side, people who didn't eat together as often had a higher intake of ultra processed foods, things like chips and soda. And that's in of itself is that should just stand out like, wow, that's really interesting. Why? And we'll get into the why in a moment. But to stretch this out, like, let's look at the specific impact on kids because again, growing up in that environment, in the inner city, but I ate upwards, and I'm not exaggerating, upwards of around 80 of my diet was ultra Processed foods.
- [25:12]
A
Easily, easily, on many occasions, take out frozen foods, etc.
- [25:18]
B
We were on, you know, we had food stamps and weight program and that kind of stuff. And you just get the cheapest stuff that you can get. And I'm saying it's not abnormal because the Journal of the American Medical association, this was published recently, just a couple years ago, they looked at ultra processed food consumption by U.S. children for about 20 years. All right, so this was dating from around 1999 to 2018. All right. In 1999, the average U.S. child diet was around 62% ultra processed foods. Already by 2018, that number was almost at 70%. It was like 67.5% ultra processed foods making up the average child's diet in the United States. And of course, you know, there's, that's the mean, you know, there's going to be some at the lower end and higher end. I was definitely at the higher end. And it's just normalized. And so, you know, just understand that's kind of what we're dealing with here. Now to get back into why this matters for kids, this incredible study was published in the journal Pediatrics. And they were looking at family eating behaviors and health outcomes of the children. Right. How often were the families eating together and what was going on with the children's health? It's fascinating stuff in and of itself. And they found that when kids ate with their parent. Parent or parents or caretakers, three times a week or more. Three times a week was at minimum effective dose. These children had a dramatically lowered incidence of developing obesity and disordered eating. All right, so there was something protective against obesity when these kids were able to eat with their parents.
- [26:55]
A
That is so interesting. So when you talk about the social impact and how that's improving lifespan and longevity per se, is there another social activity that you think is having a major impact on longevity? Because I can. What I'm seeing a lot of is a lot of people. You know, you move to a new city. Right. When I first moved to New York, the best way for me to make friends was to go to fitness classes. And I did. I met my. I went to Rumble. And that was in like 2016 or 2017. And that's where I met my first friend. Right. In a Rumble class. And I think that engaging in certain behaviors like this is also aiding in our longevity as well. And it's also having a social connection approach to it.
- [27:40]
B
Yeah, of course. That just all of these things feed into longevity because we're out, we're moving, we're exploring These are things that even now you, you could just use your phone and have food delivered right to your door, right. Put it right in your hand. You can even find a mate on your phone. You don't got to go places like you could just schedule and just go and sit down, you know. And you know, part of this is just again, being human and that's changing and that's okay. It's not to say that again you can't meet, you know, the love of your life via an app. But what about those inputs? What about what the environments are qualifying you to do? When you go to that fitness class, when you go to, you know, that, that, that church get together, when you go to, you know, the, the hike with a bunch of friends that get together or community hike or you know, you go to the, you know, the party or whatever the case might be, you know, the barbecue. There's so many different ways that we need to be intentional about putting ourselves in these environments. Because also I think you are aware of this as well. Like social anxiety has exploded. Right. People are so much more and fear and have feelings of anxiety just around being around other people than ever before.
- [28:51]
A
I have that when I, when I have a huge to do list.
- [28:55]
B
See, this is speaking to again, there isn't a one size fits all anxiety. It's different for everybody. Matter of fact, there isn't the same anxiety for any two people. It's existing in two totally different people with different life experiences, different triggers, different ingredients that are leading to that experience. And so you just mentioned it's like a feeling of overwhelm and you've got a lot going on and that's speaking for you. A big part of that is just being able to process, to have time and to feel clear and prepared and some other things that might be calling out for you versus like I don't want to be around people or I'm scared to be around people, you know, but there, again, there is, there's. I'm not painting this picture. This is the same for everybody. But there's a reason why and it's because we're being less human. We're not connecting with each other. And so, yeah, absolutely. Exercise classes are fantastic. There's so many types now, so many types. Again, just social gatherings that we've traditionally done, whether it's like community, you know, get togethers, barbecues. One of the things that we were just talking about, our friend Drew Pearl, it. He has his men's hike.
- [30:06]
A
Yes, he does.
- [30:07]
B
Right. And just you could be the person that, that gets us together, you know, and just gets a bunch of friends and you guys go for a hike, you know, instead of just, you know, maybe going to brunch or whatever you might do, if you guys get together, you could do something active, right? Pickleball has exploded. It's everywhere. And my, my guy right here in the studio, he's shared that. You know, there's these cool places here in LA that people are going and there's different. There's a lot of community building around that. So it doesn't matter what the medium is, it's just a matter of being active and being human. But to circle back to what I feel is the biggest leverage point, which is eating together. Another study looking at children found that children who ate together with, again, one or more parents or caregivers on a regular basis. And this could have been any meal, breakfast, lunch or dinner. They ate at least five servings of fruits and vegetables at least five days a week. All right? When they didn't have that, that was a minimum effective dose. When they didn't have that, they ate far more ultra processed foods, chips, sodas. And the researchers noticed specifically if the TV was on. Right. There's something technology being involved that led to eating more ultra processed foods. And so that's what children. I want to share this for adults. And this was done in the tech world on IBM workers. And this is going to full circle what we started this episode with. So they were tracking the work behavior and the, quote, getting home in time to have dinner with their family. And what they found was that when these workers were able to get home and have dinner with their family on a consistent basis, stress stayed manageable. They were able to better metabolize stress. Work morale stayed high and their job satisfaction stayed high. But as soon as obligations cut away from their ability to, quote, make it home in time for dinner, work morale drops, stress accelerates, and their job satisfaction started to go down.
- [32:11]
A
Oh, wow.
- [32:12]
B
You know, so there's something about sitting down with the people that you care about, being able to offload stress. This doesn't mean you have to talk about your stressful day. No, it's just maybe for you it's connecting with your purpose, right? Maybe it's your children, maybe it's your significant other, maybe it's just that time to slow down. And now we can talk about what are some of those things happening behind the scenes that's leading to these health outcomes. Like there's a change in our, in our chemistry that takes place when we're around people that we care about.
- [32:37]
A
Oh my gosh, this is such a, an impactful episode. So the, the quality of our friendships and the quality of our social connections can either help us live longer or not, correct?
- [32:56]
B
Absolutely.
- [32:58]
A
Did you read about the Harvard study? I mentioned it earlier. It was the 80 year long study which specifically looked at brain health outcomes. And you know, you would think, okay, well what helps us live longer? And it turns out it was the quality of our social relationships. So that was specifically looking at who's got the best brain health. And. Oh, that was my first. That was, that was, I think I looked at that two, two years ago.
- [33:25]
B
Yeah. You know, the great thing about that study is they look, they're looking at so many different aspects and they're actually showing up at these people's homes. You know, maybe it's annually or semi, annually. This could be people that are just, you know, they spread out all over the world and like checking their hormones and looking at all these biometrics and it's really cool with such a huge body of data. And what they're going to find is the things that you teach. Right. These inputs help to keep your brain youthful and keep your body functional. And so let's dig in on the specific practice. Like what do we do? What are some best practices and what's going on behind the scenes. Number one, big picture, when you're around people that you care about. Now we, oxytocin is having a moment right now as well. But there's a change in your chemistry. And one of the things that increases when you're around people, especially close to people that you care about, you have an increased production of oxytocin. Right. It's got this nickname of like the love hormone or cuddle hormone. It's so many other things. And also there's other hormones and neurotransmitters that create that love feeling as well. It's not just oxytocin. I just want to make that clear. But it is a part of the equation. And a 20 second hug, you know, it doesn't even have to be 20 seconds, but that's what the data shows is like there's like this minimum effective dose of like significant increase in oxytocin when you hug somebody that you care about. 20 seconds.
- [34:52]
A
Okay, so hug more people. Yeah, hug someone that you love.
- [34:56]
B
It just calms your nervous system. So here's why this matters. Oxytocin is one of these few notable hormones that counteracts the activity of cortisol. And again Cortisol. We talked about inflammation as well. Cortisol is not bad in and of itself, but if it's getting produced at the wrong times and in the wrong amounts, it can mess you up. Absolutely. So oxytocin has this ability to kind of bring down cortisol and to step out and look at the bigger picture. With that, it's shifting over that sympathetic fight or flight aspect of our nervous system that tends to be just hypertonic for most people today. And it switches over to that parasympathetic rest and digest. Digest nervous system. This is why it pairs so well with eating and eating behaviors. You metabolize your food better, you have more of a production of satiety related hormones. You make better food choices when you are in the context. And this is not across the board, of course, you can make some wild food choices that are wildly inappropriate with people, you know, when you're hanging out with friends and whatnot. But just in general, this act of eating together and having. The most important part here is the consistency. It invokes planning, it invokes intentionality. And we do have an awareness of what a healthy meal looks like. And we tend to put those pieces together when we know we're having dinner together. Right. And so those are a couple of things. And also just.