Mindful Mondays With Ashley Dupuy: How Gratitude Rewires the Neurodivergent Brain

Summary

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Podcast Summary: The Neurodivergent Experience

Episode: Mindful Mondays With Ashley Dupuy — How Gratitude Rewires the Neurodivergent Brain

Release Date: February 16, 2026
Host: Ashley Dupuy (with reference to Jordan James and Simon Scott)

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Episode Overview

This Mindful Mondays episode—hosted by Ashley Dupuy—explores the neuroscience and transformative potential of gratitude for neurodivergent individuals. Far from being another “positive vibes only” sermon, Ashley uncovers how gratitude physically retrains the brain’s filter for information. Listeners learn science-backed strategies to start rewiring a hyper-alert nervous system for balance and resilience. The episode features relatable stories, eye-opening research, and a gentle guided practice, making this both insightful and actionable for autistic, ADHD, and highly sensitive people.

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Key Topics & Insights

1. Gratitude Beyond “Toxic Positivity”

(02:27–05:40)

• Ashley addresses skepticism:
  • “When I first started hearing gratitude making the rounds in the Wellness zeitgeist, I felt a quiet eye roll rising inside me. It felt like toxic positivity, to be honest.” (04:36 - 04:51, Ashley Dupuy)
  • Many neurodivergent people experience “just be grateful” as invalidating due to their unique, ongoing struggles.
• Core message: Gratitude isn’t about bypassing pain or faking happiness; it’s about changing the brain’s patterns.

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2. The Neuroscience of Gratitude

(05:40–07:12)

• Scientific discovery:
  • Ashley recounts reading a Time article: “Even if you are in such a place that you can’t summon anything to be grateful for, just the act of trying to search for something to be grateful for is beneficial to your brain.” (06:16–06:45, paraphrased)
• Gentle, not forced:
  • “That didn’t sound like fake it till you make it. It sounded like a very gentle, very precise way of nudging your brain in a new direction. No forced emotions required.” (06:58–07:07, Ashley Dupuy)

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3. Gratitude in Extreme Circumstances

(07:39–10:09)

• Personal story:
  • Ashley describes training in NLP and hypnotherapy with Phil Quirk, who worked with wounded combat veterans.
  • “If you’re going to walk into a room like that and start talking about gratitude, you better have the goods to back it up. … Clear evidence from neuroscience and lived experience that gratitude practices can profoundly change how the brain filters reality, even in the most extreme circumstances.” (08:50–09:12, Ashley Dupuy)
• Parallel to neurodivergent experience:
  • Many neurodivergent people live with chronic stress—a different but equally real “battlefield.”

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4. The Reticular Activating System (RAS): How the Brain Filters

(10:09–14:08)

• RAS explained (the “tiny DJ” in your brain):
  • “There’s a little section in the brainstem called the Reticular Activating System, or RAS for short…you can think of the RAS like a tiny DJ choosing what tracks get played in your awareness.” (10:46–10:54, Ashley Dupuy)
  • The RAS filters what information enters your conscious mind, based on what you frequently focus on or find important.
• Examples:
  • Seeing more of a car model you’re considering buying, or suddenly noticing many other pregnant women once expecting.

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5. Gratitude as a Neural Training Practice

(12:51–15:30)

• Negativity bias:
  • The brain, especially for neurodivergent people, is wired to scan for threats and negatives.
• How to rewire with gratitude:
  • Start with two new, specific gratitudes each day (“not the obvious headlines”), prompting the RAS to scan for positives big or small.
  • Over time, “your inner spotlight shifts…gratitude in this sense is microdosing meaning.” (14:22–15:14, Ashley Dupuy)

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6. Modern Life Hijacks Your Brain

(15:30–19:12)

• Social media and negativity:
  • Scrolling exploits the RAS’s negativity bias, leading to chronic arousal and anxiety.
  • “Your RAS is being trained to scan for what’s wrong, what’s scary, what’s missing. … You literally get shown more of what you react to.” (17:07–17:35, Ashley Dupuy)
• Nutrition metaphor:
  • “Think of the information you consume, the way you think about food and digestion…it’s the same thing with information…Afterwards your brain is digesting that information and it’s quietly changing your RAS, changing how you view the world.” (18:16–19:08, Ashley Dupuy)

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7. Gratitude as a Tool for Neurodivergent Minds

(19:12–23:52)

• Balancing the threat detector:
  • “Gratitude practices matter so much. They don’t cancel out the realities of the world, but they do help balance the way your RAS is tuned.” (19:18-19:36, Ashley Dupuy)
• Ram Dass quote:
  • “Gratitude opens the heart. In the space of a grateful heart, you can move beyond judgment and attachment…How sweet, how rare, to be given a body in which to move about this universe.” (20:08–20:35, Ashley Dupuy, quoting Ram Dass)
• For Autistic and ADHD brains:
  • Gratitude isn’t about pretending everything isn’t overwhelming or chaotic—it’s about noticing support and safety alongside difficulty.

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8. The Brain’s Two Worlds and Intention

(22:57–23:52)

• Drawing on John Vervaeke’s model:
  • Left brain: logic, what is.
  • Right brain: imagination, what could be.
  • “Your attention trains your filter and your filter shapes your reality. And for neurodivergent minds, that filtering effect is amplified.” (23:19–23:27, Ashley Dupuy)
• Summary point:
  • “Gratitude feeds safety, abundance amid chaos. Which is why gratitude isn’t naive, it’s neural. It widens what your brain is allowed to see.” (23:46–23:52, Ashley Dupuy)

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Memorable Quotes & Moments

• On reprogramming your RAS:

  • “I hope you will join me in a six week challenge to reprogram your RAS: two points of new gratitude each day and watch how this transforms your life.” (23:55–24:07, Ashley Dupuy)

• On balance, not denial:

  • “We are training the filter, not denying reality, just widening it. And as always, remember, we’re all just walking each other home.” (35:21–35:30, Ashley Dupuy)

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Key Timestamps for Important Segments

• Gratitude skepticism and culture: (04:36–05:40)
• Time magazine science revelation: (06:16–06:45)
• RAS explanation: (10:46–11:34)
• Gratitude as “microdosing meaning”: (14:08–15:30)
• Social media’s effect on negativity bias: (15:30–19:12)
• Guided gratitude practice begins: (24:17)
• “Walking each other home” closing: (35:21)

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Guided Practice Segment (24:17–34:10)

• Step-by-step mindfulness practice:
  • Appreciating the body and breath
  • Bringing to mind someone who adds positivity
  • Reliving a joyful or peaceful experience
  • Feeling gratitude for personal growth through challenges
  • Noticing small moments of everyday joy

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Closing and Next Episode Preview

(34:26–35:21)

• Ashley previews next week’s Mindful Mondays: all about the science and magic of sound and vibration for neurodivergent nervous systems.

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Final Takeaways

• Gratitude is not simplistic optimism: For neurodivergent individuals, it’s a science-driven, practical tool for gently shifting the brain away from perpetual threat detection and toward a more balanced, sustainable sense of reality.
• The RAS is the key lever: Repeated focus on new sources of gratitude slowly recalibrates your internal “search engine,” making resilience and small joys more accessible.
• It’s about intention and patience: Two daily gratitudes, practiced with honesty, can profoundly change your lived experience over time.

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Recommended action:
Try Ashley’s six-week challenge: record two new gratitudes each night. Email your experiences to mindfulmondayspodcastmail.com.

Closing encouragement:
“May you notice one small thing today that your brain would normally overlook.” (35:21, Ashley Dupuy)

---

Transcript

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[Ashley Dupuis]

Welcome back to Mindful Mondays. I'm your host Ashley Dupuis and this is your weekly space to slow down, soften the edges and start your week off with presence and purpose right here on the neurodivergent Experience podcast. So whether you're autistic, adhd, highly sensitive, or simply curious about consciousness and change, you are so welcome here. This is A space where your sensitivity is not a flaw to fix. It's part of your wisdom. And over the last two episodes, we've been exploring resilience and mindset, how to.

Get comfortable being uncomfortable, how to bounce back, and how to reframe your life.

In a way that supports you rather.

Than weighs you down. And today, we're going to braid those.

Threads into a topic that can sound.

Simple, but is actually profoundly powerful. When we understand the neuroscience Gratitude.

And if you're already rolling your eyes a little, stay with me. This episode is most definitely not a positive vibes only inspirational poster. Because for neurodivergent nervous systems that are already overwhelmed in pain or navigating burnout.

That kind of pressure can feel invalidating. Instead, we're going to go deep into the neuroscience of gratitude, how it reprograms your brain to counter negativity bias, especially.

For neurodivergent brains wired more deeply for.

Intensity and and threat detection. Because once you understand what gratitude actually.

Does to the brain, especially a neurodivergent.

Brain, everything is going to change. So by the end of today's episode, you'll have a clear, science backed understanding of why gratitude works and how to practice it in a way that honors your reality, not bypasses it.

Okay, so I have a confession to make.

When I first started hearing gratitude making.

The rounds in the Wellness zeitgeist, I felt a quiet eye roll rising inside me. It felt like toxic positivity, to be honest.

A kind of just think happy thoughts approach that ignored the very real pain.

And complexity of people's lives. You know those inspirational posters that tell you to hang in there with a picture of a kitten on a branch?

That's what it felt like. Fluff, no substance. And if you're neurodivergent, living with sensory overwhelm, executive dysfunction, chronic pain, or years of masking and misunderstanding, being told to.

Just be grateful can land as yet.

Another way of saying you're the problem. So for a long time, gratitude stayed.

In the category of things that other people might find helpful, but that didn't feel particularly relevant or accessible to me.

Then something shifted. I remember reading a really interesting article in Time magazine. This was probably around 2017 or 2018. It was talking about what actually happens in the brain when we experience gratitude. Not the hallmark version, but the neural circuitry, the chemistry, the patterns that light up when you feel or even search for gratefulness.

And because I'm me, as soon as.

I see something being backed up by.

Science in relation to how we feel.

My ears prick up. And there was one line in particular, right near the end of the article that completely changed how I saw gratitude. The article said something like this. Even if you are in such a place that you can't summon anything to be grateful for, just the act of trying to search for something to be grateful for is beneficial to your brain. So that stopped me in my tracks.

I remember thinking, wait, I can improve.

My brain just by looking for something to be grateful for, even if I don't actually find it. That felt different.

That didn't sound like fake it till.

You make sounded like a very gentle, very precise way of nudging your brain in a new direction. No forced emotions required. So a seed was planted when I.

Read that, and it stayed there, quietly germinating.

I did try and use it a bit, but this was right around the.

Time my health was really beginning to.

Nosedive and I didn't yet have the.

Tools to help that seed grow.

Still, something had shifted. Gratitude was no longer in the fluff category. It was in the I need to.

Circle back to this category.

So Fast forward to 2020. My health was at its worst, a real rock bottom moment. And as a kind of last ditch effort, I signed up for a training course in nlp, neuro, linguistic programming and hypnotherapy. And my trainer was Phil Quirk of Limitless Group and founder of the Ather Principle. Early on in the training, Phil started speaking about gratitude in the brain, the same territory as that Time magazine article. But he went even deeper into the how and why. And he brought in an example that.

Completely reframed the stakes.

Phil started his working life in the.

Raf, the Royal Air Force.

And after a number of years, he transitioned into coaching. And one of the places he began coaching was a center where wounded soldiers came to recover from their injuries. These were people who were missing limbs, had traumatic brain injuries, and had seen the very worst of human combat. And Phil said, essentially, if you're going to walk into a room like that.

And start talking about gratitude, you better have the goods to back it up. You can't go in with a vague think positive to someone who's lost their.

Best friends, their limbs, or sense of their old identity.

And thankfully, he did have the goods.

Clear evidence from neuroscience and lived experience that gratitude practices can profoundly change how the brain filters reality, even in the most extreme circumstances. Now, these weren't people whose lives suddenly became easy. They were people whose inner lens began to shift just enough that a sense of meaning, possibility and even joy could coexist with their pain. And this really matters for those of us who are neurodivergent. Many neurodivergent people carry years of micro wounds, missed diagnosis, school trauma, medical gaslighting, social rejection, chronic burnout. You may not have experienced combat, but your nervous system may still feel like it's been living in a kind of ongoing battlefield. So gratitude in this context isn't about pretending your experiences were fine. It's about asking, is there any small way I can start to shift what my brain is highlighting so that my entire inner world isn't dominated by threat, comparison and loss? And that question brings us to one of my favorite little parts of the brain. When Phil Quirk was teaching us about gratitude, he went deeper into his explanation for why this works. There's a little section in the brainstem called the Reticular Activating System, or RAS for short. And for this episode, we're just going.

To call it the ras. And you can think of the RAS like a tiny DJ choosing what tracks get played in your awareness.

The RAZ is essentially a pattern recognition and filtering system. There is far too much information coming in at any given moment for your brain to process consciously. So the RAZ decides what gets through.

The gate and what doesn't.

And it operates a little bit like Internet cookies do you, you search for something online and then on a different website, you suddenly see an advertisement for the exact thing you were just looking for. And some everyday examples of this are a phenomenon that happens with pregnant women.

As soon as someone finds out they're.

Pregnant, suddenly it seems like there are.

Pregnant women everywhere they go. And it's not that more pregnant people have magically appeared, and it's that their.

RAZ is now tuned to that pattern. Or let's say you're researching to buy a new car, the make, the model, the color, and then suddenly you start seeing that exact car everywhere on the road. That is your RAZ in action. It filters the world and shows you more of whatever you're focusing on, whatever you've implicitly told it is important.

So for neurodivergent brains, this is huge.

If you're autistic, your RAZ might latch onto details, patterns and anomalies far more intensely than others. And if you're adhd, your RAZ might be hungry for novelty and stimulation and therefore get pulled towards endless scrolling, switching, and the next thing. Now, all brains are programmed toward a negativity bias. And many neurodivergent people live with a heightened negativity bias. A brain that is constantly Scanning for threats, social rejection, sensory overload, signs that.

You'Re getting it wrong.

None of this is your fault. It's how your nervous system has learned to keep you safe. But this is where gratitude becomes less of a moral idea, more of a neural training practice. So starting a regular gratitude practice can literally rewire your brain. And the magic is in choosing two points of gratitude at the end of the day. And each day they need to be two new pieces of gratitude. So let's unpack that. When you sit down at the end of the day and ask yourself, what are two things I'm grateful for that I haven't named before? You're making a very specific request of your RAs. You're asking it to scan your entire day. Not for threats, not for failures, not for proof that you're behind, but for anything big or small that could be a source of appreciation.

Now, in the first week or so.

This is going to be fairly easy.

You'll have obvious pieces of gratitude, like.

Your pet or your family, your friends.

Having a roof over your head.

After a while, you run out of.

The obvious headline gratitudes.

And that's where it gets really interesting and where your razz starts to change. Two or three weeks into a regular gratitude practice, finding new pieces of gratitude each day means you have to start noticing the tiny things that were always there but didn't register before. You're reprogramming your raz to look for things to be grateful for. Suddenly your brain starts to highlight new things, registering more deeply the smell of coffee in the morning, or the softness of your pet's fur, or a stranger who held the door for you, or the way sunlight hits the wall in your bedroom, or the relief of finally sitting down after a long day. Now, these are not huge life changing events. They are micro moments your raz might have completely ignored when it was primarily tuned into what was going wrong. But as you practice, your inner spotlight shifts. And gratitude in this sense is microdosing meaning. And it's the same principle behind many of the practices I share on Insight Timer. Not forcing emotion, just gently guiding the brain to notice what's already steady.

And this ties in beautifully with last.

Week'S episode on a growth mindset. Because gratitude is an enormous part of a growth mindset, where growth mindset says, what can I learn from this? Gratitude adds, what can I appreciate in this? Or alongside this? And for neurodivergent nervous systems, which are often closer to activation at baseline, this is not about pretending everything is fine. It's about giving your Brain additional data to work with. Data that says, yes, there's difficulty here. Also, there is beauty, support and small goodness. So over six weeks of daily practice, that becomes a very different lived experience of the world. So let's talk for a moment about how our modern lives are completely hijacking our razz. Social media scrolling creates depression and anxiety because the brain has a negativity bias to search for threats. And once you feel a threat, say a scary headline, or a comparison to someone's perfect life, or a piece of bad news, your brain wants to find an all clear signal, something to reassure you that the danger has passed. The variable reward of the next post.

Possibly being that all clear keeps you scrolling.

It's like a slot machine.

Maybe the next swipe will give you relief.

Except most of the time it doesn't. It just feeds you more negative stimulus, more outrage, more comparison, more, not enough. Meanwhile, your nervous system stays in a hyper aroused state. Your raz is being trained to scan for what's wrong, what's scary, what's missing. And because the algorithm learns what keeps you engaged, you literally get shown more.

Of what you react to.

Fear, anger, shock, beauty standards, productivity, porn. And the news cycle works in a very similar way. There is so much polarization right now and fear sells. It's one of the easiest ways for media outlets to get clicks and engagement. And none of this is conspiracy, it's just how attention driven systems work. The problem is that your raz is listening. And once again, Phil Quirk offered a real nugget of gold here, a metaphor that makes this beautifully simple. Think of the information you consume, the way you think about food and digestion. When you're eating, you experience the taste in your mouth and you feel full after you swallow. But then the rest of digestion happens outside your conscious awareness. It's the same thing with information. You're consciously aware while you're watching the news or scrolling TikTok or reading a thread. But afterwards your brain is digesting that information and it's quietly changing your wrath, changing how you view the world. You might not notice it in the moment, but suddenly the world feels more dangerous. Other people feel more judgmental, life feels more hopeless, and your own life feels smaller or less than. And I want to be really clear.

Here, I am not suggesting you should never read the news or never never go on social media.

That's a very personal decision and it can be important to stay informed and connected. But what I am suggesting is that you become very aware of what this is doing to your Brain and how it's affecting your experience of the world. If your raz is being programmed all day by fear, shock and comparison, it makes sense that it would feel harder to access gratitude, that your nervous system stays on high alert. This is why intentionally bringing in gratitude practices matter so much. They don't cancel out the realities of the world, but they do help balance the way your raz is tuned. They give your brain more than one channel to listen to. And I want to bring in a.

Voice we've referenced before.

The late spiritual speaker Ram Dass, who said, gratitude opens the heart. In the space of a grateful heart, you can move beyond judgment and attachment, finding your way to love and later reflecting on mortality. He said, enormous gratitude for the moment of light and breath I live. How sweet, how rare, to be given a body in which to move about this universe that doesn't deny suffering. It honors impermanence. And if you listen to episode 22.

On resilience, you'll recognize this theme.

Life is finite, and that finiteness is what makes it precious. So if you're autistic, your sensory system may be more intense, your pattern spotting more acute, your experience of social and environmental threats more frequent. Gratitude is not about saying this isn't overwhelming. It's about letting your raz notice. Alongside the overwhelm, the small islands of safety and pleasure, the soft blanket, the one friend who gets you, or the feeling of warmth on your skin. And if you're adhd, initiation might be hard. Time might feel slippery and rejection sensitive. Dysphoria might make small setbacks feel huge. Gratitude can become a way of saying, I'm grateful I tried or I'm grateful I remembered eventually, instead of only focusing on the moments where you got it wrong. Over time, that feeds your brain with evidence that you're not just chaos. You are also resilient, creative and persistent. And for all neurodivergent profiles, gratitude doesn't erase trauma, systemic barriers, or the need for accommodations. What it does is offer a gentle way to reweight your inner evidence list. Your raz stops being a pure threat detector and becomes a more balanced, more, more humane filter. Back in episode 12, we talked about what our brains are doing in any given moment. Cognitive scientist John Vervaeke says the brain is constantly weaving together two worlds. The left brain is logic, data, facts, spatial orientation, basically what is. And the right brain, imagination, intuition, creativity, what could be?

And your nervous system stands between them like a tuning fork.

Every single moment of your day, your brain is asking, based on what I know and based on What I believe, what is my next move?

But remember, your razz is deciding what gets noticed. Before either side builds a story, your.

Attention trains your filter and your filter shapes your reality. And for neurodivergent minds, that filtering effect is amplified. So make sure you are intentional about what you are feeding your brain, just like you'd be intentional about feeding your body. Gratitude feeds safety, abundance amid chaos. Which is why gratitude isn't naive, it's neural. It widens what your brain is allowed to see.

So before we move into today's guided.

Practice, I hope you will join me in a six week challenge to reprogram your raz two points of new gratitude each day and watch how this transforms your life.

And if you participate in this six week challenge, I'd love to hear from you. Just email mindfulmondayspodcastmail.com and let me know.

How this simple practice begins to surprise you in the most beautiful of ways. And if you are currently driving or operating heavy machinery, please ensure to pause the recording now until you can safely come back into stillness. And just begin by finding a comfortable seated position. Or you could be lying down, Ensuring your body is warm and fully supported. And whenever you're ready, feel free to gently close your eyes. Take a deep breath in through your nose, feeling a sense of calm entering your body. And as you exhale, let go of any tension or stress.

[Paige Desorbo]

Good.

[Ashley Dupuis]

That's right. And just begin by bringing your awareness to this very moment. Feeling the simple comfort of sitting or lying here, breathing. Taking this time for yourself, Feel a sense of appreciation for your body, for its ability to breathe. And to support you in this practice, Let a gentle wave of gratitude fill you for this very moment, this gift of presence. And now allow your mind to bring up an image of someone who brings positivity into your life. It could be a friend, a family member, or even a cherished pet. Just picture them in your mind's eye. And allow yourself to feel gratitude for their presence in your life. And imagine sending them a silent thank you, feeling the warmth of appreciation spreading through your heart. And just take a moment now to reflect on what they add to your life. How their presence has brought joy, support or kindness. And as you hold this feeling, notice how gratitude softens and opens you, allowing you to connect more deeply with this positive energy. Good. That's right. And now bring to mind a moment in your life that you feel grateful for. Perhaps an experience that brought you joy, joy, peace, or sense of accomplishment. Just allow yourself to re experience that moment, Recalling any details you can Remember. And feel the gratitude for this experience, for what it added to your life, and for the lessons or joy it brought. And just simmer in all the details. Let yourself savor this memory, feeling how gratitude keeps it alive and vibrant within you. And now, if it feels comfortable, can you think of a challenge or difficult experience that helped you to grow. While it may not have been easy, this experience may have led to valuable lessons or personal strength. Gently allow yourself to feel gratitude for the resilience you gained and for the ways it shaped you and made you stronger. And this is not about ignoring the difficulty, but about honoring the strength and growth that emerged. Really feel how this gratitude connects you more deeply to your own resilience, helping you climb the ladder toward a place of calm and connection. And finally.

Bring your awareness to the.

Small moments of everyday life that bring simple joys. This might be the warmth of sunlight, the smell of freshly brewed coffee.

The.

Sound of unbridled laughter, or the comfort of a cozy bed. Just allow yourself to feel gratitude for these little things that often go unnoticed. Each small joy is a reminder of life's gifts. Really feel the gratitude for these details, knowing that they contribute to a rich and fulfilling life. And only once the raz in your beautiful mind is fully reprogrammed will you be able to open your eyes. Thank you so much for spending this time and space with me.

If this episode resonated with you, you.

Can explore deeper guided practices with me over on Insight Timer, just search for.

Ashley Dupuy that's D U P U Y.

Next week, in honor of World.

Sound Healing Day, which we marked on.

The 14th of February, we're diving into the science and subtle magic of sound. We'll explore how vibration shapes the nervous system, how music can shift your state and mental minutes, and how tools like binaural beats and intentional soundscapes can gently influence both the stories you tell yourself and the physiological state your body lives in. So whether you're highly sensitive to sound, deeply soothed by it, or easily overwhelmed by it, this episode will help you understand why sound affects you the way that it does, and how to use it consciously for regulation, healing and growth.

It's going to be a fascinating one, and I think you'll hear your own.

Experience differently by the end of it. Until then, may you notice one small thing today that your brain would normally overlook. And may you remember we are training the filter, not denying reality, just widening it. And as always, remember, we're all just walking each other home.

[Paige Desorbo]

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