Podcast Summary: The Nightly – “Asparagus Psychics & More Brooklyn Beckham Hot Takes”
Host: Hatch Podcasts
Date: February 1, 2026
Participants: Mat (A), Kristen (B)
Episode Overview
This cozy late-night episode of The Nightly is a pop-culture-filled slumber party in podcast form. Hosts Mat and Kristen unwind with chatty vibes covering buzzy TV recommendations, hilarious pub quiz trivia, and some of the weirdest news of the week—including an asparagus-throwing psychic and the latest Brooklyn Beckham family drama. The conversation flows like a warm pub chat, mixing offbeat news, gentle jokes, and snuggly recommendations, perfect for bedtime wind-downs.
Main Discussion Points & Insights
1. Cozy Winter Routines & TV Faves
[01:32 – 03:54]
- Kristen shares her recent focus on hygge-inspired winter coziness: “Staying in a lot, watching all the buzzy TV shows...what the Danish people would call Hygge time, you know, light some candles, get under some blankets, read a book.” (Kristen, 01:32)
- Buzzy TV Pick: Heated Rivalry, a Canadian drama about two hockey players. Kristen notes the rarity of queer representation in sports stories and recommends it as a complement to the real-world Olympics.
- Book Recommendation: Mat mentions “Bear Town” by Frederick Backman—a Scandinavian hockey-themed novel with an HBO adaptation, adding to the hygge winter suggestions.
2. Brooklyn Beckham Family Drama
[05:08 – 07:06]
- Mat and Kristen dive into the latest wave of gossip about Brooklyn Beckham’s Instagram rants, where he aired awkward family tensions:
- “Brooklyn spoke about it at length... paragraphs and paragraphs of spilling tea.” (Kristen, 05:27)
- The big ‘scandal’? Embarrassing motherly dancing at his wedding.
- Mat shares a hilarious personal anecdote about “meeting” Brooklyn Beckham at a urinal: “We urinated together, me and Brooklyn Beckham.” (Mat, 06:30)
3. Asparagus Fortune Telling: The Asparamancer
[07:43 – 13:20]
- The eccentric news of the night: Jemima Packington, Bath’s 69-year-old “asparamancer,” who predicts the future by throwing asparagus up in the air and “deciphering their landing patterns.”
- “This is Jemima Packington, 69, who is known as the world’s only asparamancer. And I’ll be honest, she looks exactly how you’d think she’d look.” (Mat, 08:09)
- Her big 2026 predictions (as revealed by asparagus):
- Political upheaval in the UK
- Shocking US election outcomes
- Major flooding
- Celebrity scandals and surprise deaths
- Swing-style music overtaking K-pop (Kristen: “Swing’s coming back!” [09:51])
- England soccer fans to have a tremendous World Cup
- The hosts chuckle over the broadness of these prophecies (“Politics will be messy and there’ll be climate change.” – Kristen, 09:33), suggesting anyone could try “vegetable-based” fortune-telling.
- Notable banter about better vegetable psychic names:
- “I could be the world’s foremost romaine lettucemancer.” (Kristen, 12:30)
4. Pub Quiz Trivia Night
[13:57 – 18:35]
- Mat relays that his usual pub team rival “Denser” (an elderly team, play on “Mensa”) is now half-depleted, giving him a better chance at victory.
- Challenging pub quiz questions from this week:
- National Animal of Australia?
Correct answer is the "red kangaroo," not just "kangaroo" (Kristen gets tripped up: “Oh, no. Are they even that different?” – 15:31). - Who invented the little black dress?
Kristen nails it with “Coco Chanel” (16:22). - Where’s Billie Eilish from?
Correct answer: Los Angeles (“We just went with USA, which apparently, like the asparagusmancer, far too vague for that pop quiz.” – Mat, 17:26). - Which famous American pop band was originally called Kara’s Flowers?
Correct answer: Maroon 5 (18:04)
- National Animal of Australia?
- Gentle teasing throughout as Kristen scores poorly, quipping: “I think I need to go to a pub where the average age is maybe seven and then maybe I’d do better.” (Kristen, 18:35)
5. Wholesome End Notes: Bluey & Bedtime
[18:46 – 19:35]
- Mat shares his new habit of watching Bluey (Australian kids show) because “my cat really likes it.”
- Kristen wraps up with: “As I drift off to sleep, I will think of vegetables and trivia and make predictions for the future. But maybe I’ll share those predictions next time.”
- Invitation for listeners: Share your own “vegetable psychic names” and bedtime stories at thenightly@hatch.co.
Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments
| Timestamp | Speaker | Quote / Moment | |-----------|----------|-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------| | 01:32 | Kristen | “What the Danish people would call Hygge time… light some candles, get under some blankets, read a book.” | | 05:27 | Kristen | “Brooklyn spoke about it at length… paragraphs and paragraphs of spilling tea.” | | 06:30 | Mat | “We urinated together, me and Brooklyn Beckham.” | | 08:09 | Mat | “Jemima Packington, 69, known as the world’s only asparamancer… she looks exactly how you’d think she’d look.” | | 09:33 | Kristen | “All of that seems vague. Like politics will be messy and there’ll be climate change.” | | 09:51 | Kristen | “Whoa. Okay, swing’s coming back.” | | 12:30 | Kristen | “I could be the world’s foremost romaine lettucemancer.” | | 15:31 | Kristen | “Oh no. Are [red kangaroo and kangaroo] even that different?” | | 16:22 | Kristen | “Coco Chanel.” (On who invented the little black dress; gets it right on the first try.) | | 17:26 | Mat | “We just went with USA, which apparently, like the asparamancer, far too vague for that pub quiz.” | | 18:35 | Kristen | “I think I need to go to a pub where the average age is maybe seven and then maybe I’d do better.” | | 19:21 | Kristen | “As I drift off to sleep, I will think of vegetables and trivia and make predictions for the future.” |
Important Timestamps
- [02:32] Kristen recommends Heated Rivalry
- [05:08] Brooklyn Beckham gossip begins
- [07:43] Asparamancer discussion starts
- [13:57] Pub quiz trivia segment
- [18:46] Bluey/bedtime chat and wrap-up
Overall Tone
- Warm, light-hearted, delightfully silly
- Gentle teasing and playful rapport
- Encouraging relaxation, conversation, and finding joy and oddity in everyday stories
Listener Takeaway
This fun, meandering episode will leave you grinning and ready for sleep, brimming with quirky facts (asparagus psychics! Canadian hockey romance! Red kangaroos! Maroon 5’s original band name!) and the kind of companionship you want at the end of a long day.
