B (2:50)

The part that really sends me is his phrasing of I don't think we're gonna be compatible as partners when the previous thing was just a silly collab. It's just a fun little silly collab.

C (3:03)

He must not like kfc. I don't know.

A (3:06)

So terrible.

B (3:07)

Wow. And see, that's. That's a red flag.

A (3:09)

That's a huge red flag.

B (3:10)

Okay, I didn't know five months of dating. That seems. Well, I guess this brings a debate into play here, which is when is too long for a text breakup versus a call? I would say over three months. I'd say you kind of got a call in person. Don't you think? Is. Am I being too sensitive?

C (3:29)

It's funny you say that, because I never thought I was this type of person, but I was like, basically, come say it to my face. Like, you hit me with this text. So he did. But I totally agreed with that, obviously. I was like, damn.

A (3:43)

I think I would go even further. I would say if, like, you are dating and you slept together more than once, you can do more than a text. You could do more than a text. I like it because I'm like, all right, going on a few dates, whatever. But like, once you, like, actually become intimate with the person and it's not just like a hookup, it's like a recurring thing. I'm like, if we've been in bed together, I think we can talk to each other. I think.

C (4:16)

Yeah.

A (4:16)

You know, if we're dating. If we're dating. That's my. That's my thing.

C (4:20)

Totally. Like, buck up and show up in person. Right?

A (4:24)

Yeah, show up.

C (4:26)

Okay.

B (4:26)

So he did haha react it. I'm seeing. Or did you haha react your own?

C (4:31)

No, hehe reacted it.

B (4:33)

See, I'm not loving this.

C (4:35)

Yeah. I think that was like, long before he sent the breakup text, which I also called him out for generating it with ChatGPT.

A (4:43)

Oh.

C (4:43)

Cause I was like, you did not write this. You did not write this. Like, I know how you write.

A (4:48)

That's wild.

C (4:49)

It was perfectly drafted and had. It was like, you know, it was just too perfect. So I'm like, you did not write this. Come say it to my face type. Yeah, yeah.

B (4:59)

You can tell because the hyphens. He's spelling day. Hyphen two. Hyphen day.

C (5:03)

Yeah.

B (5:05)

Trying to balance us on a day two day. I'm like, I don't know. You're typing. You're not doing hyphens over on the text. Not this guy.

C (5:13)

Yeah, it's giving. It's giving. AI.

A (5:17)

So wait, not only did he break all over text, he didn't even write his own text message.

C (5:21)

He didn't even write his own text message.

B (5:24)

Like, and this is like you said.

C (5:26)

Yeah, we were going on a date, like, three times a week. He was. I. We both went to Europe. We were like, FaceTiming every day.

A (5:35)

Wait, wait, y' all went on vacation together?

C (5:38)

No, we were, like, FaceTiming on our Europe trips.

B (5:40)

Uhhuh.

A (5:41)

Oh, okay. Okay.

C (5:42)

We didn't go on a trip together, but it was, like, keeping up across the country. So I just. I thought it was pretty wild. I'm like, okay, that's really. That text must have really done it for him.

B (5:54)

Now, did you listen to the fried chicken audio on Hatch as you grieved?

C (6:00)

I did.

B (6:01)

Okay.

C (6:02)

I did, I think.

A (6:03)

Did it make you feel better always?

C (6:06)

Yeah, always.

B (6:07)

I was listening. And it's a nice one. There's innovation there. I didn't think we could find new because obviously I like white noise, but now there's brown noise, there's pink noise, and now there's fried chicken noise. I didn't know. I love it. I like innovating.

A (6:21)

I didn't know. I didn't know. I didn't know this. This innovation. And listen. Listening to fried chicken noise. It'll do multiple things to me. One, make me sleep and make me very calm. I'm going to be very happy. You know, I get it. I get it. Now we just need smells. Rain smells.

B (6:40)

Ooh, rain smells. That's good. Oh, I do like that.

A (6:44)

That would be good. Absolutely.

B (6:46)

Nora, I'm gonna open up about I in the. Similar to him. I fumbled lately with a text.

C (6:52)

Okay.

B (6:53)

And I didn't get a response back, but I think it was my fault. And I'd like to share. This is the first time I'm sharing, and I'd like your perspective of what I did wrong.

C (7:00)

Okay.

B (7:01)

So he sets up a date. He's like, oh, this week is gonna be really busy for me, but how about we do next week at any. Picked a bar near my house.

C (7:11)

Great.

B (7:12)

And this is a first date, so I haven't met him. This will be before we've met. I said, sounds great. Looking forward to it. But I didn't, like, keep the convo going. He said the last thing, but he said this week was going to be busy. I'm not trying to bug him. So then I follow back on, like a Monday, and I'm like, hope your busy week was good. Let me know when you want to schedule. And then I got crickets. Nothing interesting when I'm telling the Story People are like, if he texted last, you shouldn't have let it go. Four days without texting. But I was like, what do I need to say? I haven't even met you.

C (7:45)

Yeah, Yeah, I agree with you. I'm like, if he wanted to, he would.

B (7:51)

You said you were busy.

C (7:52)

Yeah. You left it on. It wasn't like you left him on red with a question. You know what I mean?

B (7:56)

Kinda. I could make convo for the sake of making convo, but I'm like, I don't know you yet. I feel like that's what the first date is for. I'll see you when you're not. I don't know. Some people were saying. I. I guess I'm just nervous because I feel like I've heard you have people that text so, so much before the first date, and then they're like, oh. And then you get in person and the banter's not that good. And I'm like, I don't want to do that. Save it for in person. What do you think? Jackie's.

A (8:19)

I agree. Save it for in person. Also, if. If we've made a plan and that plan is more than four or five days away, like, I am under the impression, especially if it's a first date, second date, something like that, I am under the impression that I ain't got to talk to you again until like a day or two before to confirm that, like, we are still on for said date. You know what I'm saying?

B (8:46)

That's what I'm saying.

A (8:48)

Now if, like, before all of this, there was a bunch of back and forth text messaging and things like that, but if it was happening, I can understand being like, they just kind of stopped texting, but I wouldn't be like, I'm gonna ghost him total.

B (9:03)

And if somebody says to me, hey, I have a busy week, that to me is like, hey, you go have your. I'm not. I got my own things going on. I'm a busy girl too.

C (9:11)

Yeah. And then he scheduled something for a certain date. Like, that's pretty wild.

B (9:16)

Okay. I thought I fumbled a baddie, but I think the reverse is true.

A (9:21)

I think.

B (9:22)

Thank you.

A (9:22)

I think the reverse is true. I think he fumbled a baddie.

B (9:25)

It's tough.

A (9:26)

He fumbled a baddie. Dating, dating. Dating in this era is rough.

B (9:33)

Yeah. People are very particular. And I get it. I feel myself being quite particular too, where I'm like, ugh, I just want to protect my time and peace. But that's my thing. I am like, with the apps, I'M like, I know I'm coming across horribly because I'm just like, this is not how I usually get myself. I need to talk and chat, but then I end up meeting people in person and they all do the same thing, which is what I do, which is comedy. And it's like, well, now we're only dating one type of person.

C (10:01)

Yeah.

B (10:02)

So it is like the apps you gotta get on was this was. I'm gonna call him the Hatch hater. Nora. That's the name of this man. Love it, love it. Was he from an app?

C (10:12)

He was not from an app. So he actually had his own nickname. I guess I'll call him out because he was working at a bar when I met him and he was wearing a shirt that said chill guy. Oh, I know. Like, what was I doing? And so, like, me and all my friends met him while he was working at the bar and for the whole time I was seeing him, we referred to him as chill guy. But it was weird for me because he was really my, like I was in a relationship for six years and then I went out with my friends, like, and I met him. And so I don't want to say it was a rebound, but like, it was new, you know, so that was my first time entering like the dating world since college. So.

B (10:56)

Yeah, it was, it was a trip.

A (10:59)

I'm as well had been in a very long term relationship over a decade. And like, coming back to the dating world after such a long relationship, like, that is so wild and it's so hard. Like before that person, we dated and we broke up like a few years ago. But before that, I hadn't dated since like George Bush was in the, like the White House. And so I'm like, this is a whole new world right now.

B (11:27)

Yeah.

A (11:28)

You know, for real.

C (11:29)

Like, I was not on Hinge or Tinder or, you know, I wasn't on the apps before because they weren't really a thing. So it's like, it really is like a new era. And so if you have been in a long term relationship, you're now entering something like, totally wild.

B (11:45)

Yeah. And it's weird to not. I mean, I was like four and a half years and then starting dating again. And it is weird to be like, oh, you have to just like not go into domestic life. Like, you're just so used to being like, oh, why aren't we just like doing the dishes next to each other? And you're like, oh, because I don't know you, that's why. Oh, because I Literally don't know the first thing about you. It's so hard to, like, switch from, like, oh, the way I act with a partner is so domestic or whatever. And then now I'm like, oh, it has to be like, surface, casual, fun. I like casual. I mean, it's like, I like the, like, you know, fun date nights of it, all of casualness. But it is like. It's a weird dissonance to be like, oh, totally. I forget what this looks like and feels like somebody's gonna really appreciate all of the sounds that are on the hatch machine.

C (12:34)

That's my criteria.

B (12:36)

That's kind of a litmus test. Now you have to bring them over and you have to go, and what do you think of this? And now this.

C (12:43)

What's your hatch sound exactly? That's like the new, like, what's your sign?

B (12:46)

Yeah. Yep. Mine is pouring rain.

A (12:49)

We gotta be like, good before I bring you over and let you hear my hatch.

B (12:54)

You know, that's intimate.

C (12:56)

Yeah, it is intimate. It is intimate. That's like a third date question. At least. And then when you see it in person, that's a whole nother thing.

A (13:06)

You gotta earn these hatch sounds.

B (13:17)

Okay, before we hit the full hatch experience and hit the bed tonight, how about a little Kiss, Marry, Kill? Since we're talking all things dating. I love that game related to fast food mascots. Okay, okay, I'm gonna throw this one too. Jackie's first.

A (13:35)

Okay.

B (13:36)

Jackie's Kiss, Marry, Kill, Colonel Sanders, the Taco Bell dog, and Chuck E. Cheese, Charles Entertainment. Cheese.

A (13:46)

Good old Charles Entertainment. May I ask just one clarifying question that's gonna be true for all of us? Which Chuck E. Cheese? Is it current Chuck E. Cheese? Is it Chuck E. Cheese in the 90s? Or is it creepy Chuck E. From the 80s?

B (14:03)

I would say this has to be like, suit. This is like the suit with the head, the suit.

A (14:08)

This is like the.

B (14:09)

In person.

A (14:09)

In person.

B (14:11)

And I would say it's not this current one who looks a.

A (14:15)

He looks 12. Yeah. As a child.

B (14:17)

Yeah. He's looking a little.

A (14:19)

He needs some of that pizza. He needs some of that Chuck E. Cheese pizza.

B (14:22)

All right, so this is gonna be our childhood.

A (14:23)

It's our childhood, Chuck. Okay, thank you. That's better. I can do that. Okay. I'm still gonna kill him. But, like, I just wanted to know.

B (14:31)

You wanted to see how cruel it was.

A (14:32)

I just wanted to see how cruel it was gonna be to do so. Yeah. You know what? Let me re evaluate this, because I may have to kill the taco Bell dog. Yeah, it's just, you know, I didn't really relate to the Taco Bell dog. And I'm like, you know, Colonel Sanders makes me chicken.

B (14:54)

He's a good guy.

A (14:56)

Cheese brought me entertainment with arcades and that good pizza. And so, like, I think I would kiss Colonel Sanders.

C (15:05)

Yeah.

A (15:05)

And then I think. I think I would kiss Colonel Sanders. Cause, like, that's a comfort, right? And I think I'll marry Chuck E. Cheese, because that's fun and comfort. That's both. So I gotta go ahead and. Gotta go ahead and take Taco Bell dog out.

B (15:23)

I think that makes sense. Nora, Rebuttals, changes, agreements.

C (15:27)

I go with your first. I gotta kill Chuck E. Cheese. And, I mean, he's too much. His energy's too much.

B (15:38)

He's too much. He's a little creepy.

C (15:40)

I know we're talking a little bit, but. Yeah. And I mean, we already know I'm marrying Colonel Sanders.

B (15:47)

I agree.

C (15:47)

We already know because I'm a KFC Stan, and I. I'm not a big Chihuahua fan. But, like, I will kiss the Taco Bell dog.

B (15:58)

Like, sure, absolutely.

C (15:59)

Yeah.

A (15:59)

He's gonna bite your nose.

C (16:01)

Yeah.

B (16:02)

Yeah.

C (16:02)

Like, it'll be fun.

B (16:04)

Now, I was thinking of some ones that we've missed. I mean, I like the three that we put in, but I guess the fat boy guy. Do you know that? Fat Boy Burgers?

C (16:15)

I don't know Fat Boy. That's not where I'm from.

A (16:17)

Fatboy Burgers. I know. Big Bob's Burger. Is that who you're talking about?

B (16:22)

And that's the exact guy I'm talking about.

A (16:23)

Okay. Okay.

B (16:24)

Absolutely. It's that man, for sure. Yeah, Yeah. I like his checkered overalls.

A (16:32)

Okay.

B (16:32)

I think that is a stylish guy.

A (16:34)

Okay.

B (16:35)

I'd like to present some other ones. Let me see who we're missing. I mean, Ronald McDonald would be a really interesting choice for me. Ooh.

C (16:43)

He goes in the category as Chuck E. Cheese with me.

A (16:46)

I'm doing too much. But he got a bunch of friends, though. You know? He got good friends.

C (16:51)

Yeah, he's popular.

B (16:52)

And I am gonna look up his height real quick. Cause I think we can forgive some stuff. Let me make sure.

A (16:57)

Let me see.

C (16:57)

Okay.

B (16:58)

The pillow fort encyclopedia is saying that he is six feet tall. It doesn't forgive a lot. But I think Hemp's charity work needs to be recognized. He has a house. Ronald McDonald's house.

A (17:11)

He got a foundation, too.

B (17:12)

He has a foundation.

A (17:13)

He got the foundation. He got the house.

B (17:15)

There's something There.

A (17:17)

Yeah.

B (17:17)

Wendy, you know, is a child. So producers, I understand why you didn't put her in.

A (17:24)

Right. But Wendy, Wendy, I think Wendy. I think Wendy. I think Wendy is. I think Wendy is 22.

B (17:32)

I think Wendy's. Let me look in the pillow for it. And cyclic Wendy.

A (17:35)

Wendy's 22. I mean, real Wendy is like older than all of us.

B (17:39)

So that's the thing. Wendy was born in 1961. So she is 64 years old.

A (17:44)

See?

C (17:44)

Okay.

A (17:45)

And so by the time I was born, Wendy was 25 something. So, yeah, Wendy's free game is free game. Wendy is free game.

B (17:56)

Okay, see, because I was having an issue with this question when I first posed it because I don't find the Taco Bell dog obviously, to be desirable considering he's a dog.

C (18:07)

A dog?

A (18:08)

Yeah, he's a dog.

B (18:09)

So I'm just trying to see if we've missed any other human ones.

A (18:12)

You can also go. You know, McDonald's had a few extra ones. You can go Grimace.

C (18:16)

I was going to throw Grimace out there. I'm a Grimace fan.

A (18:19)

Grimace, absolutely silly.

B (18:21)

He's got to be tall. Checking on that one.

A (18:23)

Also, Grimace is a tall, big boy.

B (18:26)

He's 10ft tall.

A (18:27)

See?

B (18:28)

Uh huh.

A (18:28)

Yeah.

B (18:29)

I think this isn't fast food, but I do think some of those M and Ms, they have a lot of charisma. I'd like to talk about some of them.

A (18:35)

Oh, the green. Mm.

C (18:37)

Shout out Green. Mm. We're on the same page. Yeah.

B (18:40)

You and Jackies have similar Grimace and Green.

C (18:42)

Mm.

B (18:43)

Yeah, yeah, there's something there.

C (18:45)

Okay.

B (18:46)

I like these Buc EE's. That's a gas station beaver from Texas.

C (18:51)

Yeah.

B (18:52)

Listen, something to consider.

A (18:53)

I have a picture with Bucky and like my hand is right on his belly because that felt right for me and him.

B (19:01)

That's physical. Touch is huge.

A (19:03)

It is.

B (19:03)

You know, you have to have that chemistry.

A (19:05)

I would marry Bucky.

B (19:06)

I think I would marry Bucky.

A (19:08)

I would marry Bucky.

B (19:09)

Nora, thoughts on Bucky?

C (19:12)

I mean, I would marry him, but am I picking between him and Colonel Sanders?

B (19:16)

No, you can keep Colonel Yeah. I also think Colonel Sanders. Did they not do a little bit of a run marketing wise where he was hot and had abs?

A (19:24)

They have.

B (19:24)

Yeah.

C (19:25)

Yeah.

A (19:25)

For a minute, Colonel Sanders was like a WWE wrestler. Yes, I remember that.

B (19:31)

Good.

C (19:31)

You know, like call me Mrs. Sanders because I'm all here for it.

B (19:35)

You've loved and lost for him. You were willing to put it all on the line to say, I like this Hatch collab. You know who I'M for sure killing every day of the week. Who? That Burger King one with the plastic head. We can't deal with that.

A (19:49)

He got to go.

B (19:50)

No, that's a scary man.

A (19:52)

He got to go.

B (19:53)

That is not. There's something wrong with that plastic head. I don't like him.

A (19:58)

He got to go. And also, like the smile, you know, he reminds me of like the end of the Santa Claus three when they're making clones of Tim Allen. I don't know if anybody's ever seen this movie before. And they just make him a clone and he's like a toy, but like life size and it's so creepy and he's a bad person. That's who the Burger King reminds me of.

C (20:22)

No, thank you. Yeah.

B (20:24)

Okay. Those, I think, I mean, I think we hit all of the. The ones that are really, like, you know, reasonably marriable.

A (20:34)

And definitely some kisses in there, too.

B (20:36)

There's some kisses and there's some kills.

C (20:38)

And there's a couple kills.

A (20:40)

There's a couple kills.

B (20:41)

There's a couple kills.

A (20:42)

Are all of these better than chill guy, Nora?

B (20:47)

I'd say all.

C (20:48)

I'd put him in the category with Ronald McDonald.

A (20:53)

It's too much.

C (20:55)

It's too much.

B (20:55)

He's a clown. Ronald's a clown. That's it. I am feeling so ready to drift off to the beautiful sounds of fried chicken frying because we've made all the right choices today.

A (21:08)

I feel fantastic.

C (21:10)

Me too.

B (21:12)

Thank you so, so much, Nora, for coming here and telling your very, very funny story. And relatable dating is simply weird.

C (21:19)

Thanks for having me, guys. I'm glad we can all relate.

A (21:23)

Yes. Yes. This was really fun.

B (21:25)

I agree. Good night, Jackie. Good night, Nora. And good night, everybody. Listening.

A (22:31)

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