Living Alone After College w/ Kristen Meinzer

Summary

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Podcast Summary: The Nightly – "Living Alone After College" w/ Kristen Meinzer

Date: July 7, 2026
Host: Kristen Meinzer (Hatch Podcasts)
Guest: Kira (recent college graduate, Evanston, IL)

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Overview

This episode of The Nightly centers on the transitional experience of living alone for the first time after graduating college. Host Kristen Meinzer welcomes listener Kira, who shares her feelings about the solitude of post-grad life. The conversation explores routines, the complexities of independence, the changing nature of social connections, and advice for coping with big life changes. The episode provides a comforting, reflective, and reassuring take on identity, loneliness, and growth in early adulthood.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Setting the Scene: Kira’s New Reality

• Kira graduates from Northwestern University and is now alone in her apartment as her roommates have moved out for the summer (01:12–02:53).
• She describes the emotional and practical shift:

  “It's a weird feeling for sure. A weird feeling of transition that I haven't really dealt with in this specific way before.” (01:37, Kira)

2. The Emotional Transition from Shared to Solo Living

• Kira had always lived with others—family, college roommates abroad, and six close friends during her last two years (02:28).
• She describes the poignancy of going from a full, lively apartment to empty spaces:

  “We have this massive couch...just a week ago, the couch was literally filled with people. And the other night, I was watching this show that we usually watch just by myself, and the couch was empty...It was definitely a weird feeling.” (04:52, Kira)

• Kristen empathizes and points out how transitions can bring unexpected feelings of loss, even when anticipated.

3. Coping with the Absence of Built-In Social Life

• Kira has been proactive about maintaining connections — going out with friends, participating in group chats, planning meetups with people still in town (05:32–05:54).
• Kristen praises Kira's self-care and social awareness:

  “This is one of the best things I can do for myself, is have something to look forward to every day. That shows real emotional maturity.” (04:18, Kristen)

4. The Pros and Cons of Independence

• Kira always identified as independent, not shying away from doing things solo, and once found the idea of living alone appealing (06:25).
• She reflects on the reality:

  “Over the few days, I have gotten to do fully what I wanted. But, like, I would trade it in an instant to be with my [roommates] again...That sense of community and always have someone to talk to that I feel like I even, like, took for granted.” (06:48, Kira)

• Kristen observes how the lack of a structured, busy routine might exacerbate the loneliness, suggesting that living solo is different when there’s a full work schedule:

  “Maybe it would be more fun to live alone if you were working in a bustling newsroom or a TV production set...whereas right now that’s not the case.” (07:53, Kristen)

5. Seeking and Giving Advice: Honoring Your Own Needs

• Kira knows she needs structure to thrive; she plans to build routines by working in cafes, meeting up with others, and setting intentions for productivity (10:09–10:51).
• Kristen reassures her:

  “It sounds like you’re already doing so many great things. It’s just—it’s only been a week.” (10:51, Kristen)

• The importance of not being too hard on oneself during a major transition is emphasized:

  “From the outside, what I hear from you is this is somebody who's growing, and this is someone who's really smart and is gonna do the right thing for themselves.” (11:14, Kristen)

6. Producer Harry’s Perspective: The Social Roommate Life

• Producer Harry shares his experience of always having roommates, never living alone due to both cost and preference (12:07–13:26).
• His “long running joke about the crippling loneliness of living alone being not for me” brings humor while normalizing different housing preferences.
• Kristen and Harry discuss the idea that both living solo and with others are valid choices, and the only correct answer is what works for you right now (13:26–14:32).

7. Kristen’s Experience: Surprising Herself by Loving Solo Living

• Kristen shares that she was warned she’d hate living alone, but actually loved it due to her packed schedule (14:32–16:04).
• She reflects:

  “I really was only home long enough to go to bed, maybe watch a half hour of TV before bed. And I loved that for that little time I was at home, I never had to deal with anybody else’s dishes...I had full control over my space and I really loved it.” (15:42, Kristen)

8. Looking Forward: Plans and Future Transitions

• Kira shares her plans: upcoming family vacation to Italy and Greece, possibly visiting more friends/family, and then starting the Disney College Program in Orlando (16:21–17:16).
• She is excited and slightly nervous about her new role but will be back in a social, dorm/apartment experience (17:31–18:01).
• Kristen notes this could change how Kira feels about independence and community.

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Memorable Quotes & Moments

• Kristen to Kira:

  “I love your sense of self awareness and your sense of ‘I’m gonna take care of myself.’ This is one of the best things I can do...That shows real emotional maturity.” (04:18)

• Kira on trade-offs:

  “I would trade it in an instant to be with my [roommates] again and just have that sense of community and always have someone to talk to.” (06:48)

• Harry on his living situation:

  “I have never, ever lived alone...now I have too many roommates.” (12:07, 12:36)

• Kristen’s reassurance:

  “There’s nothing right or wrong about being a person who likes living alone or being a person who likes living with others. I don’t think one is the better answer. It’s just knowing yourself and knowing what you like.” (13:26)

• Kristen on solo living with a schedule:

  “If I didn’t have a really busy schedule, I could see it. I could see my friends predictions being true that I might be incredibly lonely and cry myself to sleep every night.” (15:58)

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Timestamps for Key Segments

• 01:12–02:53 – Kira describes her new living situation
• 04:18 – Kristen applauds Kira’s self-care and emotional maturity
• 04:52 – Kira on the sadness of an empty apartment
• 06:25–06:48 – Kira reflects on her independent streak vs. reality of living alone
• 07:53–08:54 – Kristen and Kira discuss how routine and a busy schedule affect the solo-living experience
• 10:09–10:51 – Kira outlines routines and productivity plans
• 11:14 – Kristen’s encouragement on growth and self-compassion
• 12:07–13:26 – Harry shares his lifetime with roommates
• 14:32–16:04 – Kristen’s own living-alone story, schedule, and self-discovery
• 16:21–18:01 – Kira previews her future: vacation and the Disney College Program

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Final Reflections

The episode closes with warm affirmations about the value in both solo and shared living. Kristen thanks Kira and offers gratitude to past roommates—reminding listeners that everyone finds their own balance, and that adult transitions are both hard and full of opportunity. The conversation is candid, empathetic, and infused with humor and practical wisdom—perfect for listeners seeking comfort and company as they drift toward sleep.

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Transcript

[A]

Audio for sleep by hatch. Hey out there. This is Kristen. Welcome to the Nightly a late night call in show to help you get to sleep. Every night, listeners call in to share whatever's keeping them up at night, whatever they're mulling over, whatever they're considering, whatever they're indecisive about. And we love hearing from all of you, so feel free to reach out. We might have you on the show. We're at the nightlyatch co and we have someone special joining us tonight. Kira, welcome to the show.

[B]

Thank you for having me.

[A]

Oh, we're so happy to have you here. Where are you calling from and what's on your mind?

[B]

So I am calling from Evanston, Illinois, and what's on my mind is I recently just graduated from college. I graduated from Northwestern with a degree in TV and film. So I had commencement and convocation last week, a fun week filled with friends and family and everyone just celebrating. And now all of my roommates moved out of my apartment so they have things going on this summer. I'll be moving out in a month or so. But right now I'm just living alone essentially for the first time in my life. So that has been on my mind a lot. And just coming home and, you know, the apartment is empty and just, just. It's a weird feeling for sure. A weird feeling of transition that I haven't really dealt with in this specific way before.

[C]

Mm.

[A]

Big changes afoot. So first of all, huge congratulations on graduating. Thank you. That is an enormous accomplishment and from such a prestigious school, so huge deal. Congratulations on that. And second, congratulations on embarking on this next chapter. You know, living alone is a big step for a lot of people. You said this is your first time ever living alone.

[B]

Yeah, I mean, I was, I was going back and thinking about it and yeah, like growing up, you know, lived with my family and then freshman and sophomore year of college I had a, I had a dorm roommate and then I, I studied abroad my junior year. But even then I also had a roommate. So. Yeah. And then these past two years I've been living off campus but with six of my best friends. So, yeah, like, like fully living alone. This is probably the first time.

[A]

Wow, that is a big transition to go from six of your best friends living with you to you just occupying this whole place by yourself now. So is it a, is it a pretty big house you're in right now?

[B]

So we actually. So it's an apartment and there's like one, it's two, three bedroom apartments, but we're Kind of like attached. Like, we share, like, a back porch type of situation. So we would always just be going back and forth between the two. So it's not like my side isn't massive in itself, but it's like my side is empty, and then also the other side is empty. Empty. So, yeah.

[A]

Oh, wow. Okay. All right. I just assumed it was a house because of that many people, but this sounds like a great setup too. Okay. And so it's all you. Going from six best friends to you. And what's your typical day like?

[B]

So right now I've. I don't really have, like, a set routine, which is also weird for me. I think I'm someone that thrives off of a schedule and a routine, so I'm trying to develop that for myself in some way. But right now, I'm getting ready for vacation. I'm going on a trip to Italy and Greece with my family in about a week and a half. So I've just been starting to think about that and packing for that. I've also been doing some workout classes. But, yeah, I'm just trying to find something fun for myself to do each day, so I don't, you know, so I have something to look forward to.

[A]

Oh, that's great. I love your sense of self awareness and your sense of, I'm gonna take care of myself. This is one of the best things I can do for myself, is have something to look forward to every day that shows real emotional maturity. And I think some people, it takes them years to figure that out. And you're doing it right now, right after graduating, which is fantastic.

[B]

Thank you.

[A]

So socially speaking, you kind of had a social life built in when all your roommates were there, right?

[B]

Mm, definitely.

[A]

Are you feeling some sadness that that's not the case right now?

[B]

Yeah, I'm definitely feeling some sadness. Like, you know, a couple times a week, we would all. We have this massive couch in my apartment, and we would all sit down to watch a show together, whether it be a reality show or a movie or anything like that. So, like, just a week ago, you know, the couch was literally filled with people. And then the other night, I was watching this show that we usually watch just by myself, and the couch was empty, and I was like. I definitely felt a sense of sadness and just, like, how quickly that can just change. And it was. It was definitely a weird feeling.

[A]

Yeah. Yeah. Have you been scheduling social activities outside your house or inviting other folks over?

[B]

Yeah, there's a. There's a couple girls that I know really well, because they were. They were in my major, but I don't live with them. But I did go out with one of them last weekend. There's some people in my major who are here this summer, and we have, like, a group chat so we can plan things to do. So people have been, you know, going to the beach or seeing a movie. So I definitely have been hanging out with other people that are still in Evanston for the summer.

[A]

Oh, good, good. So it's not just you wandering the halls of your apartment by yourself thinking, oh, no, I have nobody to socialize with. That's good. I'm glad you're still socializing regularly. That's great. And have you ever thought that it would be fun to live alone in the past? Is it something you've ever. You know, maybe you watched reruns of the Mary Tyler Moore show and thought, oh, look at how Mary is. She's a TV producer living in her own apartment. Have you ever thought about that as something that would be appealing to you or not?

[B]

Yeah, I have thought about that, definitely. I am a very independent person in general. Like, I'm the type of person where if I want to go to a sporting game or I want to go to a movie and none of my friends can go or are busy or whatever, like, I'll just go by myself because, yeah, I've never let that stop me. So I definitely thought that, you know, living alone would kind of play into, like, me as an independent person. But I think thinking that. And, you know, and also, like, you know, me and my roommates had different living styles and we all. We got along great. But, like, sometimes, you know, it would just be, like, interesting to observe those different habits. So sometimes it would be like, you know, if I lived alone, would I get to do fully what I wanted? And over the few days, you know, I have gotten to do fully what I wanted. But, like, I would trade it in an instant to be with my again and just have that. That sense of community and always have someone to talk to that I feel like I even, like, took for granted, you know, these last two years or so. But. So I have thought about living alone before, and I think maybe when I move to a different city or something like that, like, that could be great to start off, off living alone at first, since I won't know anyone necessarily right off the bat. But I'm not enjoying it as much as I, you know, thought maybe at times in the past that I would.

[A]

I can't help but wonder, though, if perhaps part of this loneliness that you're feeling in your house right now is that the rest of your schedule is wide open now. And it used to be filled with classes and possibly internships or other things that you were doing, and now you just have all of this wide open time. And maybe it would be more fun to live alone if you were working in a bustling newsroom or a TV production set and you would be there with 50 co workers every day. And maybe it would be great to come home to your own quiet apartment and just chill and decompress and then only socialize when you have the energy to do it again. Maybe that would make living alone more fun. Yeah. Whereas right now that's not the case.

[B]

Yeah, no, definitely.

[A]

Maybe that's adding to it.

[B]

Yeah, for sure. I think that's a very good point that. Yeah, I mean, like some days, you know, this past week I literally haven't interacted with a person. You know, like, I'll go on walks and things like that or whatever, but for the most part. Yeah. So I think that's a good point. That. Yeah, then my 9 to 5 was filled with a lot of people. Then living alone would. Would feel a lot, a lot better.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I think, I think it would create a very different landscape to your day. But also it might just be the case that you're someone who loves living with others. I know people like that. I absolutely have had friends over the years where that's just their preferred living style. And there's nothing wrong with that at all. I have one friend now who he's in his late 40s and he still has roommates and he just loves it. And there's nothing wrong with that. The golden girls. Look at them. Yeah, they had roommates, they loved it. I don't think there's anything wrong with that. And it's something that if people enjoy doing, they should continue to do it if they want to do it. Or, you know, maybe what you're going through right now is a nice little try on period of like, okay, maybe I would like this if the circumstances were different or maybe this isn't for me, but it's a good little trial period because it's not forever. It's just between graduation and then going on your big trip with your family, right?

[B]

Yes. Yes.

[A]

So do you have any questions or do you want any advice about this or do you just want to, you know, get it off your chest that it's been a little bit tough?

[B]

I mean, I feel like any advice that I would Ask for is kind of like what I know I need to do anyway, you know, like. Like having a routine and just. I'm like, someone that if I'm gonna work on something, I want to be a screenwriter. So for me, like, working on scripts is a thing that I need to do a lot. And I know, like, I need to go out to a cafe or somewhere else to do that. Like, I'm not productive when it comes to being in my own space. So I think just, like, developing a routine for that and saying, you know, I'm gonna go to this coffee shop on this day and this coffee shop on another day and this other day, I'm gonna go meet up with friends to, you know, have someone there next to me when I'm writing. Like, I think that's the best way to. To deal with this. So, yeah.

[A]

Yeah, it sounds like, you know, all the right things to do, but it's still early days, and you just need to figure out a way to put it into practice. I mean, I wouldn't be too hard on yourself. It sounds like you're already doing so many great things. It's just. It's only been a week.

[B]

Yeah, I know. It's crazy when I think about that. It's only. It's only been a week. Yeah.

[A]

Yeah. It's all so new, and I think you're doing a fantastic job.

[B]

Thank you.

[A]

Seriously, you're doing a great job, and I feel like you are so thoughtful, and the way you're reflecting on yourself and reflecting on your needs and taking care of what you need to take care of, it shows such maturity. It really shows that you're doing a great job, Kira, even if it feels like you're lost at sea. Now, I think from the outside, what I hear from you is this is somebody who's growing, and this is someone who's really smart and is gonna do the right thing for themselves. And maybe you'll stumble here or there, but it sounds like you're the kind of person who will stumble, and then you'll figure out, oh, I'm gonna lift my foot up higher when I go over that step, and it'll be fine.

[B]

Thank you. I appreciate that.

[A]

Absolutely. I think you got this. I'm just gonna ask our producer, Harry really quickly. Harry, have you ever lived alone? And how old were you the first time you lived alone?

[C]

That's actually a very funny thing you should ask. I have never, ever lived alone. I actually have always had roommates. I went straight from college having roommates to living with Roommates out of college because I lived in New York and just couldn't afford. I couldn't afford my own place. And then I moved in with my girlfriend who became my wife, and that's just how it went. Never lived alone.

[A]

And now you have three roommates because you have two kids.

[C]

Yeah, now I have too many roommates.

[A]

So, Harry, is your sense that you're just a person who likes living with other people.

[C]

Yeah. I've had a long running joke about the crippling loneliness of living alone being. Not for me, but I think it would have been good thing to experience now. But back in the day when I was your age, I definitely had no interest in living by myself. Like, it didn't even come up as an idea of something that I could do both because of cost and also because I just really liked hanging out with my friends in the living room and watching TV all the time with them and stuff. So I definitely know when they were out of town that feeling of like, oh, I'm alone now what do I do? And how do I motivate myself? Familiar.

[A]

Yeah, I think that's totally normal. There's nothing right or wrong about being a person who likes living alone or being a person who likes living with others. I don't think one is the better answer. It's just knowing yourself and knowing what you like and then being true to it. You know, I do think it's good sometimes to push ourselves beyond our comfort zone just to see, oh, maybe I would actually like this thing. You know, maybe I would actually like riding a roller coaster. Or maybe I would actually like a beach vacation when I'm a mountains person. But I also think, you know, once you dip your toe in, if it doesn't feel good to you, it's okay to say no. That's not my thing. I'm this sort of person. I like this. Or for now, I'm not that kind of person. Maybe in 10 years I'll try to dip my toe in that again. So I think it's fine. And me Personally, I was 18 or 19, actually 19, the first time I ever lived alone. And I was warned by so many people, kristen, you can't do this. You're too much of a social person. You're gonna get so lonely, you're gonna hate it so much you will cry yourself to sleep every night because you will be so miserable. And I'm just gonna say I loved it and I was worried. The friends who warned me about living alone, they knew me very well and they were like you're just too social, you're gon miserable. But I was genuinely surprised how much I loved living alone. But this also goes back to something I said earlier, Kira, which is I had such a busy schedule when I first moved in by myself. I also had a full time job, a part time job, and I was going to college. So I was out of the house for 14 hours a day, I guess. And so I really was only home long enough to go to bed, maybe watch a half hour of TV before bed. And I loved that for that little time I was at home, I never had to deal with anybody else's dishes. None of my friends, boyfriends were in the house being loud. Nothing was going on that was gonna get on my nerves. I had full control over my space and I really loved it. But I think it does go back to that very busy schedule thing. And if I didn't have a really busy schedule, I could see it. I could see my friends predictions being true that I might be incredibly lonely and cry myself to sleep every night. But yeah, I think with you, Kira, it might be the same thing. Once you have a busy work schedule, once you're on a film set working every day. And those days on a film set can be really long.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

You know, if you're in a writer's room until midnight every night, at that point it might be fun just to go back to your own apartment and have it to yourself.

[B]

Maybe. Definitely.

[A]

Yeah. So after your vacation with your family, what. What's on the docket after that?

[B]

So then I'll have a few more weeks here in Evanston. I think I might visit some friends and family during that time. And then I'm actually, I'm doing the Disney college program starting in August. So I'll be moving to Orlando and working there for about six months.

[A]

Oh my God, are you an imagineer?

[B]

I am not. I. I won't find out my specific position until about like two or three weeks before I move in, which is a little nerve wracking. But it's like more like basic roles, you know, Like I could be selling merchandise or I could be working food service or working like children's activities at the hotel. So there's a wide range of things that I could be doing, but I won't know for at least like a of couple.

[A]

Oh, what a great foot in the door in the entertainment industry though, to actually be working for Disney. That's fantastic.

[C]

Wow.

[B]

I'm really excited. Huge.

[A]

Congratulations for landing that.

[B]

Thank you. Thank you.

[A]

Yeah. And I suppose when you're doing that, you will then be around people all the time. Once again, will it be kind of like living in a college dorm?

[B]

Yeah. They have an apartment complex that is sort of like a dorm style. I'll have roommates. It'll just be a matter of do I have, like, my own bedroom? Some of the rooms, it's like you have two beds in it and you have like a partition between the beds. But other than that, you know, you're sharing the space. And then others, it's. It's all like, sweet style. And then others I would have my own bedroom, but then like, share a bathroom and a living space with people, so I could. I could get either of those situations. But wow.

[A]

Well, I hope you have the best time doing that. And it definitely sounds like you'll never be alone. Yeah.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Once you start the Disney program, you'll be with other people all the time. And that might change your mind about living alone too, after doing that.

[B]

Yes. Yeah, for sure.

[A]

Well, Kira, thank you so much for calling in tonight. It's been such a delight talking with you, hearing about all your accomplishments, hearing about how you're taking care of yourself and all the exciting things on your horizon. I'm so happy for you. So thank you so much. I really appreciate it.

[B]

Thank you so much. It was so fun talking to you.

[A]

So good night to Kira and also a good night to all of my former roommates who ever had to suffer through their time with me because of my loud snoring or because of my irritating boyfriends that I was dating. Yes, some of my boyfriends were kind of irritating. And yeah, I'm sure I was sometimes the person who was leaving the dishes in the sink or not hanging up my coat when I came in the house and probably just getting on people's nerves. So thank you, former roommates, for everything that you tolerated, for being a good friend to me. A lot of former roommates are still friends who I talk with regularly and who I love dearly. And to everybody out there who is suffering through their own roommate stuff, you'll get through this. And to those who dream of having roommates again, you will find them. Sweet dreams to all of you. Good night and reminder, if you want to be on the show, we'd love to talk with you. We're at the nightlyatch Co. Sweet dreams, everyone.

[B]

Sam. Sa.

[C]

To learn more about our phone free light and audio experience, head to Hatch co. You can also follow us at HatchPodcasts.