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A
Hello. You're about to drift into an episode of the Nightly, a podcast designed to help you unwind and relax. For the full phone free immersive light experience, visit Hatch Co. Enjoy.
B
Hey, all you sleepy heads out there, I'm Kristen.
C
I'm Sophia.
A
And I'm Matt. Welcome to the Nightly from Hatch, a slumber party for pop culture lovers.
B
Oh, it's so great to be with both of you tonight at our slumber party. It's always fun when we have more folks here in the pillow fort. How are you both doing tonight?
C
I'm doing well. How are you doing?
B
I'm doing great. What about you, Matt? How are things over there on your side of the pond?
A
Cold. We had snow recently and it's just. Everything just grinds to a halt whenever there's snow and it's like on the news and I went and saw my mum and it came on the news that there's, you know, a couple of inches of snow forecast or whatever and she was going, oh, in my day it used to snow loads and we didn't used to go on about it. And I was like, well I mean that was 50 years ago, you're still talking about it. So.
C
Yeah, that's, that's a funny thing to say about the weather. I'm like, that's kind of a constant topic of conversation and I like the idea that like the news, reporting the weather or whatever is like so of this time. Do you like the snow mat?
A
I don't mind it. It doesn't really change much for me because I don't go out much so I'm always in the car or going to work or you know, like going to gigs or whatever. So it doesn't change a great deal. I like how it looks. I just don't like the bit afterwards when it's kind of melted and. Yeah, yeah, yeah, it's. I've got a lot of suede shoes and they, they don't work in the weather.
C
No. You have to get those waterproofed.
A
Yeah, I've got a few sprays and stuff but nothing ever really works, does it?
C
No, I don't think so. You'd have to get them like shellacked.
B
Yes. Especially if you're stepping in, you know, a six inch puddle. Even the best spray isn't going to really protect a suede shoe. Right?
A
Yeah, yeah, Maybe just some of those bags that people put on their shoes around swimming pools.
C
Yeah. I love the snow. That's my hot take. I think it's like the coziest Thing in the world.
B
Do you like to play in it or just watch it?
C
I just like to watch it and I would like to play in it, but I guess I don't really do that often in the city, but I suppose you can if you go to, like a big enough park or whatever. But mostly I like to observe it from indoors, but I just think it's so cozy. But I also have. I have proper footwear which might help.
A
That definitely helps.
C
Yeah.
A
But actually, some advice for anyone listening. A mate of mine made a snowman and he put eyebrows on it. And the difference that that made, it was the best snowman I've ever seen.
C
Really?
A
Just because he added eyebrows to it? Yeah.
C
I would expect that to scare me.
A
It is weird, it's unsettling, but it looks way better.
B
I was just thinking, why, up until now have we not been putting eyebrows on snowmen?
C
Yeah, I think it looks off putting, maybe. Maybe that's like the adult snowman, though. Too scary for kids, the eyebrows. But we can appreciate them.
A
It's quite dependent on the angle of the eyebrow, I think. Yeah. If they're sort of upright enough, then it looks happy and jolly. If you do them sort of slanting downwards, then that's pretty scary.
B
Yeah, yeah, that's true. But eyebrows really can change a whole look. Like, look at Ariana Grande's face in Wicked, where she has bleached eyebrows versus her regular dark eyebrows.
C
It can change everything.
B
Yeah, changes everything.
C
It really can.
A
I'm glad we got to the bottom of that. Anyway, it's been a long time coming. Before we move on, I do just need get this PSA out there. I just want to remind everyone listening, you can send your questions, thoughts or good nights to us at thenightly at Hatch Co. You know, anything you want to send in about eyebrows or snowman, anything like that, you can send an email or a voice memo and we might play that on the show. So, in fact, Safiyyah, can you give us an example maybe of a goodnight message?
C
Of course. Let me get into character. Hello and good night. I definitely want to say goodnight to my cats. I would love to say goodnight to, of course, all of my fans that are listening. I know there's so many of you out there. My army, my lesion. And I think I would also just, of course, like to give a proper goodnight to the moon, as is customary. And with that, I hope that everyone sleeps beautifully.
A
Absolutely nailed it.
C
Thank you.
A
So that's. That's what. That's what you've got to aspire to do. If you send a voice note. Nothing less than that.
C
Nothing less, only more, please.
B
All right. Well, tonight I thought it would be fun if we would share some half baked ideas we've been coming up with lately. Maybe they're business ideas, maybe their inventions. Things that we feel the world desperately needs. We're talking about Nobel Prize winning ideas. Or maybe not even Nobel prize winning. Maybe this can be like a second grader's idea of what a Nobel Prize winning idea is something to make all our lives better. So, Matt, would you like to go first? I know you have a really great idea that's going to change the world.
A
I really think it will. I don't want to be arrogant ever, but this is a real game changer.
C
I'm excited.
A
Detachable belt loops. Okay, so you know when you're either really angry or really stressed, you're in a rush. That's always when you catch a belt loop on a door handle every time. So here's your. And it doesn't, it doesn't end there. This is a great idea. It's a detachable belt loop. So you'll never catch it because it will detach upon catching. Of course, that detachment then triggers an app on the phone that's probably in your hand at the time because you're rushing around. And then that plays whalesong to help calm you down.
B
Oh, oh, this is definitely a hatch extension audio app.
A
Could build it in to the hatch app. So it's all right there for the taking. Because I think, I think that might be my biggest kind of bugbear with life. It's. Whenever I'm in a rush or angry, I always catch stuff. I had it once in a hotel where I was rushing and I've got like a. It's quite a thin kind of like wind jacket and it's got big pockets on the side. And I left the hotel in a rush. One of the pockets got caught on the inside door handle. Yeah, I left and I'm sort of walking away and it's a baggy sort of smock, so I got a little way away from the door before it closed and shut me and my jacket in the door. So when you're rushed and angry and then you're becoming part of a hotel.
B
Door, it's just not good.
A
That is the worst. Luckily I had the key in the other pocket, otherwise I could have been there for hours.
C
I mean, I was scared that you're about to say that it somehow compromised the functioning of the door and that you, of course, you could just take the jacket off, but then you just have a jacket hanging out.
A
Yeah. You can't leave the jacket.
C
Do you ever have it that the belt loop catches and rips the pants? Has that happened to anyone here?
B
For me, it has. And just Matt, I have to say that this whole invention has made me feel so much less alone in the world, because I thought I was the only person this ever happened to where the pocket or the belt loop gets caught on either a knob in my kitchen, on one of the drawers. That's happened to doorknobs. They're getting caught everywhere. And I've literally torn clothes that I really like. And so. Ugh. I really appreciate, Matt, you giving voice to this, because I felt like it was just a me problem.
A
No, it's a very lonely thing to happen, because whenever it happens, it does feel like the universe is specifically targeting you at that moment.
B
Yeah.
A
No, it could happen to anyone at any time. You've got to be vigilant.
C
But not anymore.
A
Yeah. Until now, if they're detachable.
C
When you first brought it up, I actually wasn't sure what the use necessarily of the product was, so I was imagining that you were going to explain that, like, you get very impatient trying to take your belt off and that you want to just be able to rip the whole thing off. And I was like, okay, that's interesting.
A
Now, this is. This is how we take it global, because you're now building in secondary uses.
C
Yeah, of course.
A
That's a really good point. It can be annoying taking a belt out, especially if you already put it in the wash and it's all crumpled up. Just. Yeah. Rip it out.
C
Yeah. I mean, sometimes I put the. I'll put my pants back in the drawer with the belt still on, because I'm like, I just can't deal with this tonight. So it really has a multitude of uses.
A
Yes.
B
I was just thinking of a third market also, possibly for all the folks out there who do erotic or exotic dancing and the clothes have to come off in an artful way during the dance. This could be very helpful for those workers out there as well.
C
Absolutely.
A
And not even in an artful way. You know, any way you like.
C
It's the new tearaway pant.
A
Yeah, yeah.
B
Yes. Yeah, Exactly.
C
I love it.
A
I don't know how it's going to attach it, whether it'll be Velcro or something, because that's the only thing you've got to think about is the admin of actually, like, reattaching the belt loop. That could be fiddly and a bit annoying.
C
Yeah. And it has to be sticky enough to bear the weight of the belt.
A
Yeah.
C
But still be able to tear away. Who knows? But that's not. That's not. You don't need to decide that. That is something the engineers will be in charge of, obviously.
A
Yeah. The underlings within the empire can figure that out.
C
Yeah.
A
Once the money starts rolling in.
C
You're the ideas guy.
A
Yeah. Yeah, Exactly. Yeah. Big picture.
B
I think this is a billion dollar idea, Matt.
A
Yes.
C
Yeah.
A
Well, you wait. Someone can't steal it now from this.
C
You can't. We have proof that you're the first one.
A
We should say that actually, everything mentioned on this show is immediately patented.
C
Yes.
A
You can't. Yeah. You can't touch that.
B
Yeah. And this is legally binding.
C
Yes.
B
Sophia, I want to hear your idea.
C
Okay.
B
I feel like you always have great ideas, Sofia.
C
No, no. That is so kind of you. This game that we play in particular, this bad business idea, really has made me realize that I am not an ideas guy. It's just not how my brain works. But one thing I was thinking of is, okay, I have a couple options, which is like, I feel plagued by sometimes, like, ordering stuff. And it's like, I don't want to, like, spend money oftentimes. This is like, I don't want to, like, order food. So this is kind of. I'm thinking of like an extensions of like, a food ordering app where basically you yourself could set the price of, like, an exorbitantly high tax that you kind of commit yourself to paying if you're going to order DoorDash or UberEats or something like that. So, like, you could set it to be like, I'm committing myself to paying an additional $20 every time I want to get takeout.
B
Just a quick question. Where does that 20 extra dollars go? Does it go toward the delivery person, to the company selling you?
C
I think it should go to the delivery person, of course.
B
Okay. Okay.
C
The important part is that it's not mine. I'm losing it. It's not going somewhere else. It's not. I'm not setting that money aside. It is a complete loss on my end. A total loss.
A
Okay.
B
Okay.
C
The other idea, along with this is when the food comes, the delivery person is going to. I can't be, like, violent in the way of, like, a punch. But you have. There is some sort of physical tax that you must pay. Maybe a pinch or even a tickle. Hate that. But just something I thought. And yeah, that is kind of what I'm rolling with.
A
It's sort of like getting your food delivered by the mafia if you've got like an extra tax on it and then physical violence at the end of it. Exactly, exactly.
C
So why not both?
B
This sounds awful.
C
Yeah, it does sound bad. It does sound bad. Yeah.
B
In a way that I would never order anything for delivery again.
C
Exactly. And that's the point. And I. But I think that it could also work for other stuff. Like, I feel like that's the stuff that I'm ordering where I'm like, I really wish I wasn't. However, if you have maybe like a shopping problem, you could add this as an extension to whatever websites you frequent and then set your own price. I feel like if I was buying clothes, Honestly, an additional $20 might not be enough to deter me. So it would maybe have to be higher. But just something to think about.
A
This would be absolutely tyrannical if you were ever in. But I see your point with it, though. It's one of the few kind of business startup pitches I've heard that actually makes your life worse in every single way.
C
Yeah.
B
Except for the delivery drivers. If I'm a delivery driver, I'm gonna be like, how can I get people to do this more? Of course I'm gonna double my tips overnight just by getting people to use this.
A
Do you think it would actually help or would you just be in financial ruin and have, like a lot of broken bones?
C
I think if I set the price high enough, it would actually help.
A
Okay. Yeah, yeah.
B
But for each user of this new invention, it could be modified based on what is their problem spending area.
C
They can decide. Who am I to say?
B
Got it. Oh, wow. That. That. That would be a real deterrent for me.
C
Yep.
B
Being charged extra plus being tickled. No.
C
Yeah, exactly.
B
Not gonna.
C
Exactly.
B
I'm not gonna spend that money.
C
If one's not enough, both of them combined will definitely be enough. Kristen, do you want to share yours?
A
Sure.
B
So I'm interested. I may have mentioned to both of you before, I am such an angry person at the movie theater these days because so many people are like, now's a really good time to watch TikTok videos. Or I'm just going to text my friends right now and I'm like, why is now the time? You need to be watching somebody play Minecraft on YouTube while the movie is literally like, you're literally sitting in front of an 80 foot screen. You can't watch that screen instead of the screen that's in your hand. Why? Why? And it just makes me so mad. And even some of the movie houses I go to, they say, you know, raise an order card and a staff member will take the person away who gets their phone out. And they never do, though. You tell the staff and you're like, hey, that person in front of me has been watching TikTok videos for the last 20 minutes. And we'll say, oh, we'll give them a warning. And then they never take them out of the theater. So I'm like, ugh, this is frustrating. So what I think the solution might be is to make every movie theater a 4D movie theater. Do you guys know what a 4D movie theater is?
C
Yes.
B
Those are the movie theaters that they shake the seats. They have misters, they have thunder and lightning settings. They can make you feel like you're in a stor. I saw Twisters, the movie with Glen Powell, that very handsome man who is kind of. I'm sure he's talented. He's just like the handsome guy who just shows up in movies and does his handsome man thing. Anyhow, in Twisters, nobody had their phone out because at any moment you could be shaking like crazy. Wind could be blowing on you. There could be water splashing on you at any moment. And you didn't want to damage your phone, right? You didn't want to drop your phone or break your phone. So what I would like is for every movie theater going forward to be a 4D punishment movie theater.
C
Amazing.
B
And if you take your phone out and any screen activity is happening there, I mean, if you take your phone out to turn it off or to silence it, that's fine. You're not going to get punished. But if your screen comes on, there's a sensor in your seat that then shakes your seat like crazy. So you can't even read what's on your screen because it's shaking too much. Right. Your seat. And if you do it as a second violation, you get sprayed with water or mist. So now your phone is all wet also. And maybe the third violation, something even worse happens.
C
But I have an idea.
B
Oh, oh yeah, I want to hear.
C
First of all, I like that we are aligned on punishment based business plans. Second of all, what I thought you were originally going to say, which maybe could be the third option, is that a movie theater in which the person behind your seat has maybe a foot pedal or some type of switch where if you are being bad, they can flip it and yeah, the seat opens up and you fall down into A pit below.
A
Nice. It's very final.
B
Yeah. I actually did think of this, Sophia beforehand. But the one concern I had about this idea, even though it's a great idea.
C
Thank you.
B
I love this idea. I don't want the movie theaters to get in trouble if you get injured.
C
But what if it's a phone?
B
You know?
C
Oh, it's not. It doesn't have to actually be painful. It will, of course, scare you in the moment because you don't see it coming because you're on TikTok or whatever. But I think it's more just eliminating the bad behavior person.
A
I mean, that's what waivers are for. If you're going to be a reasonable person, you've got no problem signing that.
C
Exactly.
A
I think that'll be fine as long as you're covered legally. And on that point, I actually, Kristin, would like to introduce electricity into the mix.
C
Of course.
A
I think that's a logical step.
B
So. So you feel a little bit of. A little bit of a buzz or a shock when your phone comes out.
A
You say little buzz. I say lethal charge.
C
I say rude shock.
A
Yeah.
C
Completely subjective.
A
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
B
Okay. I like that. We also all agree, like, don't have your screens out during your time in front of a giant screen.
C
Yeah.
B
You know what? I just thought of something. It could be the trapdoor thing where your seat goes down. It could also just be a very slow seat going down. It doesn't even have to be fast. And your seat goes down and a staff member then accompanies you out of the movie theater. You're just leaving now. That's all there is to it.
C
It's just a different way to exit.
A
Yeah.
B
Yeah. You are now out of the theater whether you like it or not.
C
I think it's good.
B
Yeah. So it doesn't have to be violent or scary. Although it could be with the electricity that Matt mentioned.
A
Yeah.
C
We're not closed off to the idea of it being violent, but it doesn't have to be necessarily.
A
No, I'm just saying be open minded, that's all.
C
Of course. And I will never. I will always keep an open mind to shocking people and stuff like that.
B
Yeah. And I suppose each theater can decide for themselves too, right? I mean, yeah, there might be some theaters where this is in line with the culture of our movie theater, and then other theaters where it's like, oh, most of our clientele are over the age of 80. We don't want to hurt anybody's hips or knees, you know, but we do want to punish People. Because Even if you're 80, that's no excuse to have your phone out right now.
A
Also, that generation would be less likely to have their phone out anyway.
B
Oh, I don't think so. No. There's this one theater I was at, and I'm like, oh, everybody's twice my age at this movie theater, and everybody has their phone out.
A
You're kidding.
C
Well, and I feel like those people actually also have, like, it's even worse sometimes because, like, maybe they aren't as familiar with how to use the phone in some ways. And so the. Maybe the screen is even brighter than it would be otherwise. Notification sounds could possibly be on.
B
Oh, yeah, all of that. Yeah. And then when they type in, it's not silent typing. It's like, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep. So you hear everything they're typing in, like, oh, come on, Ethel, I love you, but please, please stop. Yeah.
C
Gently eject them from the theater.
B
Yeah, very gently. Oh, I'm so. You know what's great? When the three of us are together, it makes us three times as smart as we are on our own. So I think all of our ideas just got better and better by talking it through with each other.
A
More and more, Cribbon came up with.
B
Ways to really elevate our billion dollar ideas into trillion dollar ideas. And yeah, I think we're gonna run the world soon. And now that I am ready to run the world, I'm also ready for a nap. And by nap, I mean bedtime. So how about you, Matt and Sophia? Are you getting tired too?
A
Yeah, I think it's about that time, isn't it? I've done a lot of thinking tonight.
C
Yeah, My brain is absolutely exhausted from coming up with so many amazing ideas. I've been firing on all cylinders. So I think it's time for me to. To hit the hay. Good night, you guys.
B
Good night, you guys.
A
Night, Sam. To learn more about our phone free light and audio experience, head to Hatch Co. You can also follow us at Hatch Podcasts.
Podcast: The Nightly by Hatch Podcasts
Air Date: February 14, 2026
Host(s): Kristen, Sophia, Matt
This cozy, late-night chat in the “Hatch Pillow Fort” is all about unwinding with a playful, tongue-in-cheek brainstorm on “punishment-based” business ideas. The hosts—Kristen, Sophia, and Matt—trade offbeat invention pitches that cheekily blend daily frustrations with pop culture humor. True to form, the discussion wanders from snowy weather to the surprisingly high emotional cost of belt loops, guilty pleasures like takeout, and irksome phone users in movie theaters—all leading to “billion dollar” business plans designed, ironically, to punish certain behaviors for the greater good.
“In my day it used to snow loads and we didn’t used to go on about it. And I was like, well, that was 50 years ago, you’re still talking about it.” — Matt (01:14)
“Maybe the person behind your seat has a foot pedal or some type of switch...the seat opens up and you fall down into a pit below.” (17:39)
“You say little buzz. I say lethal charge.” (19:04)
The episode is lighthearted, dryly humorous, and full of cozy camaraderie. The hosts gently satirize both modern life’s petty annoyances and the often-absurd world of “lifehack” inventions. Their “punishment-based” business ideas offer comic catharsis for anyone who’s struggled with everyday irritations—from tangled clothing to screen-addicted moviegoers.
Listeners leave with smiles, feeling part of a tongue-in-cheek creative think tank—invited to submit their own tongue-in-cheek innovations or bedtime farewells.