The Nightly — "We're Inches Away. No Problems." (Jan 12, 2026, Hatch Podcasts)

Episode Overview

This Nightly episode offers a cozy, late-night chat among hosts Sophia, Josh, and KP, nestled in their legendary “pillow fort.” With its signature laid-back, irreverent tone, the crew recaps their New Year’s celebrations, riffs on quirky pop culture happenings (including fandom adventures, viral internet moments, and celebrity gossip), and winds things down with sweet listener shoutouts. As always, the vibe leans gentle, goofy, and conversational, giving pop culture insomniacs reasons to smile before bed.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

Pillow Fort Vibes & New Year Recaps

• Welcoming Energy: Hosts settle in, poke fun at the close quarters and fire hazards of their “pillow fort” arrangement.
• KP’s Indie Sleaze Party ([01:26])
  • KP threw an "indie sleaze"-themed NYE party, meticulously curated a playlist, and recounts a prank where someone hijacked the playlist with "women screaming noises" ([02:00]).
  • Sophia claims to be a “prophet” for predicting the rise of indie sleaze parties way back via TikTok.
  • Josh celebrates Portland’s enduring “indie sleaze” spirit and talks about ringing in the new year doing stand-up and watching the Trailblazers game ([04:26]).

Notable Quote

"I left the Spotify jam open by accident and so I came in and somebody was playing women screaming noises… for five minutes."
— KP, ([02:00])

Scroll Party: Internet & Meme Deep Dive

• Club Chalamet Fandom ([06:09])
  • Sophia introduces listeners to the eccentric Club Chalamet, a Gen X Timothée Chalamet superfan with an intense and adversarial relationship toward Kylie Jenner (nicknamed "Slurpee" for being "a cheap drink") ([07:44]).
  • The iconic phrase: “I was inches from her. No problems.” is dissected for its meme potential ([08:22]).

Memorable Moment

“She says, ‘I was inches from her. Period. No problems. Period.’”
— Sophia, ([08:21])
"No problems is really awesome. No problems."
— KP, ([08:28])

• Fandom Parody: Which Club Would You Run? ([09:15])
  • The hosts riff on who they would “stan” Club Chalamet-style, ranging from Winona Ryder (KP) to the New York Liberty’s mascot Ellie (Josh), to Sophia’s “Club Victor” (Eva Victor).
  • The conversation pokes fun at parasocial fandom and the slightly delusional affection that drives superfans.

Notable Quote

"To be exposed as Club Victor, the Finsta that you’re running, would be really bad."
— KP, ([12:55])

Celebrity Gossip & Group Friendship Drama

• Ashley Tisdale’s “Mom Group” Article ([13:56])

  • Sophia summarizes Ashley Tisdale’s essay for The Cut about feeling iced out by her LA mom squad ([14:11]).
  • The group empathizes with adult friendship drama and mothers’ social circles, then speculates on why things got frosty.

• Spillover Feud: Hilary Duff’s Husband Responds ([16:08])

  • Matthew Koma (Hilary Duff’s husband) posted a thinly veiled Instagram roast of Tisdale: "When you're the most self-obsessed, tone deaf person on earth…" ([16:23]).
  • The hosts dissect the pettiness, loyalty, and possible backstory. The question of “who’s actually in the wrong” is left open-ended, but the humor stays light, not mean.

Notable Quote

“I’m gonna go out and say it. That’s even more vicious than calling someone a cheap drink.”
— Josh, ([16:50])

Listener Shoutouts: Cozy Bedtime Closer

• Harper & Avery Sibling Shoutout ([20:35])
  • Sophia reads a listener’s goodnight request for his sister Harper, followed by a reciprocal email from Harper for Avery’s birthday — delighting the hosts.
  • The crew closes with warm, personalized well-wishes and a reminder that listeners can write in for their own special mention.

Standout Moment

“Y’all are locked in. So happy birthday.”
— Sophia, ([21:27])

Notable Quotes & Moments by Timestamp

| Timestamp | Quote / Moment | Speaker | |-----------|-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------|----------| | 02:00 | "Somebody was playing women screaming noises…for five minutes." | KP | | 04:17 | "[Prophets] didn’t always host the parties. They just called the shots." | Josh | | 08:21 | “I was inches from her. No problems.” | Club Chalamet (via Sophia) | | 08:29 | “No problems. Because there could have been, but there wasn’t.” | KP | | 16:23 | "When you're the most self-obsessed, tone deaf person on earth, other moms tend to shift focus..." | Matthew Koma (via Sophia) | | 16:50 | "That’s even more vicious than calling someone a cheap drink." | Josh | | 12:55 | "To be exposed as Club Victor...would be really bad." | KP | | 21:27 | "Y’all are locked in. So happy birthday." | Sophia |

Segment Timestamps

• Pillow Fort & New Year Recap: 00:50–05:37
• Indie Sleaze Party & Playlist Drama: 01:30–05:37
• Scroll Party / Club Chalamet Meme: 06:08–09:13
• Celebrity Fandom Riffing: 09:15–13:47
• Ashley Tisdale & Mom Group Gossip: 13:56–20:22
• Sibling Listener Shout-Outs: 20:35–21:51

Tone and Style

• Playful, irreverent, gently gossipy (“pillow talk” for pop culture lovers)
• Hosts poke fun at themselves and embrace internet weirdness.
• Conversational, meandering, “cozy chaos” — makes listeners feel like friends hanging out.

Summary Takeaway

This episode of The Nightly is a perfect bedtime pop culture wind-down, meandering from indie sleaze nostalgia and internet fandom memes to the petty (but oh-so-relatable) politics of grown-up friendship circles. It’s peppered with sharp one-liners, memes-in-the-making (“No problems”), and moments of genuine sweetness, especially in the listener shoutout section. Snuggle in for company, comfort, and a much-needed laugh as you drift off — no problems.