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Hello. You're about to drift into an episode of the Nightly, a podcast designed to help you unwind and relax. For the full phone free immersive light experience, visit Hatch Co. Enjoy. Alright, I'm Mat.
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And I'm kp. Welcome to the Nightly from Hatch, where your late night thoughts go to rest.
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Kp, I have got two words. Oh, sorry, I just dropped a bulldog clip.
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That's more than two words.
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I have got two words for you. Buzzfeed quiz. Wow.
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It's like I entered a time machine when you said that.
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Yeah, it is. But before we get to that, okay, I do just want to talk to you about some raffles that I've been entering recently.
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Please.
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I've been entering raffles for clothes.
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Raffles. Now this is like you buy a ticket and you get a bunch of clothes or you get like one item.
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It's like a new season drop of stuff and you have to go through and basically select your size and your product or whatever and then you might get it, you might not.
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This is a brand of clothes you like.
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It is a brand. Yeah, it's a, it's, it's an offshoot of Adidas Spezial.
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It's like a. Oh, yep, yep, yep.
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The offshoot of that by. It's a designer called Gary Aspen who does it, who's great.
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Okay.
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Really excited for it. But I, thus far I didn't. I got one pair of shoes. That was it.
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Already today.
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It was. Today was when the raffle closed.
B
Oh, okay. But that's great. One pair of shoes is. That's, that's a winner.
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It's better than nothing. But I didn't get a T shirt, a jacket or trousers. So it is going to be drafty.
B
Yeah, it's tough that you can only wear those, but that's how it goes. Okay, well, shoes are kind of. Some people I'm sure walked away with not a thing in the world, probably.
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Yeah, you're right. It is better than nothing. And to be fair, most of it kind of ends up on resale anyway if you really want it.
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But you're not going to. Are you going to wear it or resell it?
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I'm gonna wear the shoes.
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Good, good.
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Yeah, yeah.
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I wouldn't have judged you too hard openly, but I would have. In my heart. It would have hurt.
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Yeah, I would have done. I definitely would have done. I had, I had a mate as well who really wanted quite a few bits from a couple of seasons ago. So he entered the raffle because more often than not you don't get anything because demand's so high for it.
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Right.
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He entered so many times from different email addresses and he won so much.
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Oh, my God.
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That he ended up just on one day, just like four grand left his bank account. And then he had a warehouse load of stuff turn up.
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Because this is not like, oh, you pay $5 and then you get the shoes for free. This is like you enter the raffle but you still have to pay to buy the shoes.
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Yeah. So it's like the shoes are like 130 quid or something. And if you're successful, then they take the money. Yeah.
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I have been bidding on things also today, in fact.
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Oh, okay. What we talking?
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Well, mine is a little less prestigious. Mine is the Goodwill. You know the Goodwill charity shop?
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Oh, yeah.
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They, I found out, have an online auction site.
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You kidding?
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And this has been horrible for me and my bank. This is just. I'm currently. Well. Cause I see it and I go, okay. I mean, the bid is ending in an hour. These earrings that are sterling silver are only $2. I have to put my bid in.
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Yeah, that's a great price.
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And then I end up winning and I go, okay, I didn't even need those. That was just. That was just something that I did because I felt pressure because the bid was ending.
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But there's so little buyers regret there because it's A, it's $2 and B, it is charity.
B
Well, they say that. I don't know how much they're actually charitying. We. I don't know. I gotta look into that. I'm. But I'm currently the top bid in five different chess sets. I really only need one. I hope I don't win all those because then I'll have five different chess sets.
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Wow. Yeah, that's going to be really annoying.
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I'm going to have to play all of them at the same time. Get mega big brain.
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How does it work? Is it. Do they take stuff from like Goodwill's all across the country and put it into like a central auction then? So like the local Goodwill would have to post it to you or something.
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This is kind of the drama that people don't like in the community is the community. The community, the thrifting community is when you go into stores lately, it feels like you just can't find anything good. It's just you feel like, where's all the good stuff? And unfortunately, because the website has been opened, a lot of the stores are saving their good stuff. You have to send them to like the central Store that does the website. So it's like, if I'm in, you know, Tucson and I see a cool Prada jacket come in, I have to send that over to, you know, the Phoenix, Arizona store, and then the Phoenix, Arizona store will put it on the website.
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Right.
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So a lot of people are a little upset because it's like, you know, the joy was, ah, I just found a Prada jacket. Whoa. And now it's like they know what they're looking for. So there's no way you would ever get that in store now. You'd only have to find it online.
A
That does take all the fun out of it, doesn't it? Because you are just going to get people whose job is to basically find good stuff like that and then they'll resell.
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But what I would say is, you know, if you're looking for, like, odd little things that you think nobody else is looking for, like, I think all the Prada on the auction sites is going to be expensive. All of the this and this that is going to be expensive. But if you're a real oddity collector, nobody's bidding on that stuff. And you get to kind of just search it from the comfort of your own home. So I was finding some vintage camping gear was kind of cool, like some old propane. There's a propane fridge. So you just have a fridge while camping. That sounds kind of cool.
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Yeah, 100% sounds. Sounds super safe. Nothing wrong with that at all.
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Burning down the forest.
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A secondhand vintage propane fridge.
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There was a night vision monocular.
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Okay, now. Now I'm listening to that.
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Okay. See? See, I knew I'd get you back with that.
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How much are we talking for a night vision binocular?
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Currently the bid's at $25.
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That's not bad.
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Not at all.
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Are you in for it?
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I put 24 in and then it was a little too rich for my blood.
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Think of all the things you could do with it, though.
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Peep. Yeah.
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Well, that is actually about it still, though.
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Peep and be sketchy.
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Yeah. What's. Have you bought other camping stuff on there previously?
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No, I mean, I'm just getting into it this week. I really haven't dug in at all until yesterday was my first day, really in the Goodwill site.
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Wow.
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I usually buy my camping stuff either new, if it's like, stuff that I'm putting right on my body. You want that to be kind of new, ideally, or Facebook marketplace. I found some good stuff there where people are getting rid of their tents and stuff.
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Yeah, Tents. I feel like that's a secondhand purchase, isn't it? Because they're well expensive firsthand.
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That's what I've been looking into. I've got some chest and then I have a big grab bag of jewelry. Like a two pounds of jewelry.
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Oh, like a random pick a mix.
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Yeah. That sounds kind of fun to search through raccoon style. Just kind of getting into the garbage.
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Yeah. That's like storage handlers.
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Yes. Yes. Which we've. I think we've talked on how it's fake, but fun.
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We have. But you can do it for real. That's really exciting.
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Yeah. That has been my joy of this week. I'm glad we're both finding joy on the auction sites.
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Yeah, it's fun. Just adds another element to it, doesn't it? It's sort of like gambling, but a bit safer because you're probably what? You can't lose. Yeah.
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And you get something at the end. Regular gambling. Just money. Boring.
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Yeah, exactly. I don't blow it on secondhand propane bottles.
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And we don't need more.
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I did, actually. I found myself a few days ago, rather than going down the Goodwill auctions route, for the first time in ages, someone posted online a buzzfeed article. Well, like a buzzfeed quiz.
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Yeah.
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I've not seen a buzzfeed quiz for I don't even know how long. Ten years, Something like that?
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I think. So that was kind of the height of. It was at least 10 years ago.
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Yeah. Everyone was doing them. Like, everyone. You see like a new. Yeah. What's your. You know, what kind of candle are you? Like, it's so meaningless.
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I would do it on shows that I hadn't even seen. It'd be like, what suits character are you? I'm like, I've never seen that. But I have to know.
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Well, it's good to know just in case, isn't it?
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Just in case it ever comes up.
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Yeah. And on that, the one I saw get posted was, what member of Oasis are you?
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Okay?
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And I immediately thought, I wonder what member of Oasis KP is.
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Yeah. A lot of people wonder that when they meet me. They go, why she's in this interesting zone. I can't tell.
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So we're gonna find out. This is okay. This is huge. It's gonna put a lot of rumors to bed, answer a lot of questions.
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Now, I don't know as much about this band, of course, as you do, but I know that one's got a bad attitude and the other one has a Bad attitude.
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So it's all subjective. It's all subjective.
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So we'll see which one I am.
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So, question one. Kp, what would you be up to on a Saturday night? A, writing great songs. B, getting drunk, ending up in a fight. C, staying and playing your guitar.
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Or D, out with the lads on a Saturday night? I'm probably out with the lads.
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Yeah. Saturday night.
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Saturday night. We only have so many in our lives.
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Question 2. How much control do you like to have over something? A, all of it. You want to be 100% in control.
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Okay.
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B, you're not bothered as long as things are going well. C, you would like to have a lot but are stopped by people higher than you.
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Okay.
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Or dangerous. You're not really bothered because if things go wrong, you have your own ideas.
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Now, can I ask a tangent question? As you're reading these, do you know which ones these are leading to? Like which member?
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Yeah, I think I can have it.
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Yeah.
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Sort of. Guess. But then again there's a lot of spelling mistakes in it, so will they end up in the logical place? Possibly not.
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Because I saw somebody making fun of these old Buzzfeed quizzes. How they would do with Harry Potter where it's like, how would you do your homework? A, evilly. B, cunningly. It's like, okay.
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Gryffindorly.
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Yes. So it's kind of like, okay, bravely. So I wasn't sure if this is giving it away, but it's good for me because I don't know. Okay, I will. How much control do I like to have? I would say I'm not bothered as long as things are going well.
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Okay. Yeah. Yeah. Number three, how do you like to dress?
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Okay.
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A, like you're a world famous rock and roll star.
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You know me.
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Could be.
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Could be.
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B, casual but smart. C, you're not bothered as long as you don't look strange. Weird questions.
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That's odd.
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D, you don't care. It's only about the music. Nothing else matters.
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This quiz was made by a 12 year old 100%.
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Do you know what? Three and a half thousand people have taken this quiz as well.
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Good for them. Good for them. I'm gonna say casual but smart.
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Yeah, I reckon I'd have gone for that. What? What is this? Okay, well, I. I can't wait to hear your answer for this, kp. Tell me, what would you do if you saw a rival?
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Whoa. And you know I have many.
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You've got so many rivals. You're always talking about your rivals. Would you? A, Knock the crap out of them. Yep. That's outer. O, U, double T, A, outer, outer them. B, use words. No physically action unless things got bad. C, do nothing. Hyphen with. We're just trying to aim for the same goals.
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Okay.
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Or D, sit back and watch, but also join in with things got out of hand.
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I would knock the crap out of them.
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You would knock the crap out of them?
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Yeah, absolutely. Ask anyone.
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Go to that same. Yeah.
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Okay. Who am I?
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Kp? You are, in fact, Noel Gallagher. You are the chief of your life. You are very much in control. You are wise, but you also like to have a good time.
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That is true. Can I say something odd that has occurred? I was clicking the same buttons on my end and I answered the same and I got somebody else. So this quiz is awesome. I got Andy Bell, who I didn't even know was an option.
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Andy Bell? Yeah, he's great. He's a bass guitarist from 2002. So I can't remember when Andy Bell came in, but either way, the bassist. Yeah. And current bassist for the live 25 tour.
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I picked the exact same questions in order and the exact same answers, and I got Andy Pell. And it says, you have your own ideas of where you want to be, but you're grateful to be in such a great band.
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Oh, that's quite sweet.
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Sure. Not really applicable to any of my life. I'm not grateful to be in such a great band. I guess I'm grateful to be in a great hosting position with you. This is kind of our band.
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Well, I don't know who I am.
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I know. Well, I think you need a band member also.
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What's your Oasis, kp. Let's do that.
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Yeah. My Oasis is gonna be also brothers, because I think that's a key part of the band, is you must be brothers. And you must be the Jonas Brothers. They're my Oasis.
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Sure. Yeah. A lot of parallels to be drawn there.
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Yes. Yeah. And you know. Do you know their names currently, Jonas Brothers?
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I do, actually. It is Joe, Nick. Nick. Jonas. Jonas.
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And there's a third.
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Is there?
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This is humiliating for Kevin. Yes. There's a third. There's three Jonas Brothers. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
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Oh, Kevin. What does he do? Is he in, like, marketing or something? What does he do?
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He plays the bass. It's always the basses that get left out.
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That's sad. He's in the band. Is he?
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He's really in it. It's the three of them. Yeah.
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Sorry, Kevin.
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Well, Kevin was kind of. He was older and he kind of was already married by the time it was just. He had his own life. He doesn't need to be like, the heartthrob. Yeah.
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So good job, really.
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And then they do have a bonus Jonas, which is the fourth brother is Frankie, and he is younger and he's not in the band.
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Bonus Jonas.
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That's a bonus Jonas? Yeah.
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Wow. What does bonus Jonas do? You know, just out of interest, I
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think he has his own band also, but he' more like indie Cool. Just doing an indie stuff, I think, in la. All right, Matt, what is your go to activity on a day off? A, writing new music or playing an instrument? B, hanging out with friends and family or C, trying something adventurous and new?
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Okay, so immediately we're more limited here than the Oasis quiz. Only three options.
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Yeah. Only three brothers. Yep. And I'm gonna say writing new music or playing an instrument. I'm saying we can switch that to our art form. Writing new jokes or performing.
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Yeah, yeah, I think I'll go with that one. I think that's the most likely. Yeah. Writing new comedy or playing old comedy.
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Yeah. Great. Okay. B, question two. How would your friends describe you in one word? Driven, hilarious, or loyal?
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Good question. No buttons for all three?
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Yeah,
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Hilarious. That's the gig, isn't it? Yeah, it's gotta be. Yeah.
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If it wasn't that, I mean, we're doing something wrong. Three, which of these sounds like your dream vacation? Exploring a historic city with lots of culture, Relaxing on a beach with great vibes, or hiking in the mountains and camping. Ooh.
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Do you know what I thought earlier? How much I need a holiday and I've not got one booked. And so it's really sunny out at the moment. The weather's kind of turned a corner here. I went for a walk in the sun and put some music on that was called, like, the Barcelona Rooftop House Chill. Something like that.
B
Oh, that's nice.
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And it sort of scratched that itch for me, to be honest, and I was like, oh, that'll do. It's cheaper.
B
Mm.
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Exploring a historic city, I think. Culture.
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It does sound nice.
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Yeah.
B
What is your go to outfit style? This is a common question in both quizzes. Classic and polished, like a blazer or jacket. Trendy and bold with some unique accessories. Or laid back and comfortable, like a hoodie or tee.
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I'm gonna go trendy and bold. That's close enough.
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And then this is gonna be really hard for you. What's your favorite Jonas Brothers song? Because you have a lot.
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Burn it up. No question.
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Yes. Okay, you are.
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Sorry. What were the options?
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Well, I was burning up and sucker and love bug.
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I got no idea. I'll go. Burning up.
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Okay, you are. Drumroll. Nick.
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Yes.
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You're the charming one with a heart of gold. And like Nick, you have a perfect balance of ambition and a laid back attitude. You can be serious when necessary, but you're also great at bringing fun to the table. You always stand out with your confident yet approachable personality. Whether leading or following, you're the one who can work hard and have a great time doing it.
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I'll take that.
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Yeah. What I like about this description is it's like covering all bases, which is great. It's like you're ambitious but laid back. You're serious but fun. It's like, okay, just in case anyone didn't see themselves in this, it's like, we'll just say you're all of it.
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I mean, it's infinitely better than the Oasis one, which was basically just, you're
B
Andy Bell, you're excited to be in
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Oasis, and we'll leave that there.
B
That was my full personality trait. Well, I think I could see Nick in you. Yeah.
A
I have to say that I was relieved it wasn't Kevin or Bonus Jonas.
B
Yeah, I would hope they didn't even put Frankie.
A
No disrespect to either, but you want to be one of the ones that I've heard of. Really?
B
Yeah. Yeah. You thought it was a band of two people, so it's good that you got one of those two.
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I wasn't even 100% sure they were banned, to be honest.
B
You thought maybe they were just a theater collective?
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Well, I thought it was like a Disney thing.
B
It was. Yeah, it was originally, but now I've gone to their concert four times when I was younger. They really scratched an itch.
A
Okay, what are we talking? Was it like an arena stadium?
B
No, I mean, I was there in the very beginning, so I was at an amusement park show that they did when they were just starting.
A
Wow.
B
Yeah. And it was probably maybe 300 people, tops. And I somehow they were like, do you guys want VIP instead? Because nobody's in the front. And I said, sure. It was like, for an FM radio concert at the park.
A
Okay.
B
So that was the first one. And then. Then they made it to arenas. Thanks to my support, of course.
A
Yeah, yeah. I'm sure they put it all down to you.
B
Thank goodness I was there.
A
Yeah.
B
They're big. They're big. I don't know that they're doing anything. Well, they're touring right now, so I guess they're still up and about.
A
Well, what about Kevin and Frankie? That's what I say.
B
Well, if they go solo, those two, I'll be there in a heartbeat.
A
I will hold you to that.
B
Yeah, well, I feel like they really nailed it. Buzzfeed quizzes are still the number one source to figure out who you are.
A
Yeah, we'll come back to this at some point. Any listeners, if you have any requests and would like to know, for example, what Fruit KP is, please do get in touch with thenightly at Hatch Co.
B
We'll do it for you. You're lucky we like you guys. This is Andy Bell signing off, going to sleep. And I do want to say goodnight to Andy Bell specifically. I had never heard of him and now I feel a real kinship and it seems like he is the silent backbone of the new Oasis. Perhaps that's how I feel.
A
Yeah, that's a fair reflection, I think. And I'll give a big, big old good night to my brother Nick.
B
Yes, Nick, Nick, Nick.
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And Kevin and Frankie as well. The overlooked ones, the quiet ones.
B
Yeah, Joe's got enough going on. He'd be just fine.
A
Yeah.
B
Thank you all. Good night, Matt. Good night.
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KP.
B
Sa. Sam. Sa. Sa.
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To learn more about our phone free light and audio experience, head to Hatch Co. You can also follow us at Hatchpodcasts.
Episode: "Which Jonas Brother Are You?"
Date: April 30, 2026
Hosts: Matt Bragg & KP Parker (Produced by Hatch Podcasts)
Tonight's episode finds Matt and KP cozying up for a nostalgic, whimsical exploration of online identity quizzes, specifically the Buzzfeed classic: "Which Jonas Brother Are You?" The hosts swap stories about late-night online shopping, quirky auction wins, and dabble in Buzzfeed quizzes to determine not only which Oasis band member they are, but more importantly—which Jonas Brother truly matches their personality. The conversation is light, playful, and delightfully digressive—perfect for winding down at bedtime.
Matt kicks off sharing excitement (and mild disappointment) about entering a clothing raffle for Adidas Spezial’s offshoot, designed by Gary Aspen:
Funny Story About Overbidding: Matt's friend enters multiple raffles and ends up winning so much, he gets hit with a £4,000 bill:
KP's Goodwill Auction Addiction: KP gets hooked on Goodwill’s online auctions for oddities like sterling silver earrings and chess sets, humorously worrying about ending up with too many:
Thrifting Community Drama: The hosts discuss how in-store thrifting’s joy is diminished now that the best items are re-routed online:
Weird Finds: KP spots a “vintage propane fridge” and a “night vision monocular” for under $25.
Both find joy searching for weird treasures, likening it to the fun of “storage handlers” but for real.
Return to Buzzfeed Nostalgia: Matt stumbles on an “Oasis member” quiz and reminisces about the heyday of Buzzfeed:
Doing Quizzes for TV Shows Never Watched:
Quiz Questions: Hosts walk through the quiz, poking gentle fun at the leading answers and juvenile spelling:
Notable & Funny Moments:
Unexpected Results:
KP reframes the original Oasis-based quiz to the Jonas Brothers, bringing an American pop culture spin:
Recounting the Jonas Brothers Lineup:
KP educates Matt on the Jonas family tree, including “Bonus Jonas,” the younger brother Frankie:
Jonas Brothers Quiz Time
Nostalgia & Reflection on the Jonas Brothers' Rise:
The hosts poke fun at the universally affirming quiz results:
Warm sign-off as "Andy Bell" and "Nick" say goodnight to their spiritual bandmates, and listeners are invited to submit quiz ideas for future episodes.
Matt on odd auction wins:
“It is going to be drafty.” (01:52)
KP on thrift auction regrets:
“That was just something that I did because I felt pressure because the bid was ending.” (03:48)
KP regarding rivals:
“I would knock the crap out of them.” (12:50)
KP about Buzzfeed quizzes:
“This quiz was made by a 12-year-old 100%.” (11:46)
Matt on learning about Kevin:
“Oh, Kevin. What does he do? Is he in, like, marketing or something?” (14:44)
Nick Jonas Quiz Result:
“You're the charming one with a heart of gold... a perfect balance of ambition and a laid back attitude.” – KP (17:54)
This episode is a joyful late-night romp through internet nostalgia, oddball auctions, and the irresistible pull of online identity quizzes. Matt and KP’s chemistry keeps things affable and genuinely funny, even as they riff on the absurdities of quizzes and the quirks of pop culture fandoms. It's an easy, charming bedtime companion full of laughs, gentle ribbing, and nostalgic warmth.
Next time: Send in your quiz ideas—KP might find out what fruit she is!
Contact: thenightly@hatch.co