#512 Love A Nap, The Maturity Stunted Game & Nikki's Latest Obsessions

Summary

The Nikki Glaser Podcast: Episode #512 - Love A Nap, The Maturity Stunted Game & Nikki's Latest Obsessions

Release Date: February 21, 2025
Host: Nikki Glaser
Co-Hosts: Brian Frangie and Noah
Produced by: Big Money Players Network and iHeartPodcasts

---

Introduction to the Episode's Themes

In Episode #512 of The Nikki Glaser Podcast, Nikki Glaser, along with co-hosts Brian Frangie and Noah, delves into a variety of topics ranging from personal habits and mental health to pop culture obsessions and the complexities of maturity. The conversation is candid, humorous, and introspective, offering listeners a multifaceted look into Nikki's life and thoughts.

---

Hair Care and Performing Anxiety (02:31 - 05:03)

Nikki opens the episode by discussing her struggle with maintaining her hair routine amidst a hectic schedule. She humorously recounts the challenges of not washing her hair for days due to back-to-back performances:

“I haven't washed my hair in four days. Since Sunday. It's Wednesday. Seems about right.” [02:31]

Nikki shares her dependency on blowouts for stage confidence, lamenting the inefficiency of hotel hair dryers and the resulting tangles:

“No one can get it right. Even if there is a little nozzle attachment, which I need for a good blowout. It most of the time that is missing.” [03:15]

Her co-host Noah introduces a convenient tool, a blow dryer and brush combination, which Nikki finds intriguing yet apprehensive about its potential tangling issues.

---

Napping: Benefits, Perspectives, and Relations to Mental Health (05:03 - 20:01)

The discussion shifts to the cultural perceptions of napping. Nikki expresses her love for naps, especially as a remedy for her depression, juxtaposing this with the disdain voiced by Cassie David about naps being for "losers":

“Naps are for babies and dogs, but not fully grown humans, like, grow.” [13:18]

Brian and Noah share their contrasting views, with Brian emphasizing discipline and Noah admitting his inability to nap without feeling worse afterward. Nikki explains how napping significantly improves her mood and mental state:

“Napping really helps my depression because a lot of times I think being depressed is just being underslept.” [16:36]

The conversation highlights the stigma around napping and the personal benefits Nikki and co-hosts experience, advocating for a more accepting view of napping as essential self-care rather than a sign of laziness.

---

Maturity and Growth: Assessing Emotional and Personal Development (20:01 - 43:26)

Nikki introduces the concept of "maturity stunted game," where she and her co-hosts assess each other's maturity levels based on body language and personal experiences. They humorously rate each other on a scale, revealing personal insights and insecurities:

“I bought myself by being like, I'm going to tell my openers where they were stopped. Maturity-wise.” [35:04]

Brian reflects on his own childhood traumas and how they have influenced his adult behavior, while Nikki shares her experiences of feeling immature despite outward appearances. The segment underscores the complexities of personal growth and the internal battles that come with perceived maturity.

---

Pop Culture Obsessions: TV Shows and Comedians (43:26 - End)

Transitioning to pop culture, Nikki and the co-hosts passionately discuss their latest obsessions, particularly the critically acclaimed series White Lotus and the comedian Chris Fleming. Nikki expresses her admiration for Mike White, the creator of White Lotus, and delves into the intricate character developments and plot twists:

“I love the White Lotus. Thank you so much to Mike White for creating this up show that is murder mystery.” [49:30]

Brian and Noah echo her enthusiasm, highlighting favorite moments and the show's impact on their viewing habits. The conversation then shifts to Nikki's newfound appreciation for Chris Fleming's comedy, praising his intellectual humor and unique style:

“He just does that like, not the joke. You know what I mean? Like, right. He dresses like a, like, he dresses like disco, 70s, kind of almost feminine sometimes.” [63:00]

Nikki describes attending his show at Largo and her relentless binge-watching of his YouTube content, emphasizing his fearless approach to comedy and his ability to challenge her intellect:

“I really like someone who's, like, challenging me to go, and I have to constantly rewind to be like, I missed that because it was so quick.” [70:34]

The episode concludes with a playful segment on spoonerisms, where Brian quizzes Nikki on identifying correct phrases from distorted versions, adding a light-hearted end to an episode filled with deep discussions and personal revelations.

---

Notable Quotes

• Nikki Glaser [02:31]: “I haven't washed my hair in four days. Since Sunday. It's Wednesday. Seems about right.”

• Noah [04:16]: “A blow dryer and a brush in one, and it's a game changer, I gotta say.”

• Nikki Glaser [13:18]: “Naps are for babies and dogs, but not fully grown humans, like, grow.”

• Nikki Glaser [16:36]: “Napping really helps my depression because a lot of times I think being depressed is just being underslept.”

• Nikki Glaser [35:04]: “I am stopped at 17. I think everyone can kind of pinpoint where they stopped.”

• Nikki Glaser [43:26]: “Several things. But I thought the most traumatic was at age 7 when I moved to this country.”

• Nikki Glaser [49:30]: “I love the White Lotus. Thank you so much to Mike White for creating this up show that is murder mystery.”

• Nikki Glaser [63:00]: “He dresses like disco, 70s, kind of almost feminine sometimes.”

• Nikki Glaser [70:34]: “I have to constantly rewind to be like, I missed that because it was so quick.”

---

Conclusion

Episode #512 of The Nikki Glaser Podcast offers a blend of humor, honesty, and insightful discussions on personal habits, mental health, maturity, and pop culture. Nikki Glaser and her co-hosts create a relatable and engaging environment, encouraging listeners to reflect on their own lives while providing ample entertainment. Whether you're tuning in for the laughs, the deep dives into personal experiences, or the pop culture commentary, this episode delivers a well-rounded and enriching listening experience.

---

Connect with The Nikki Glaser Podcast:

• Website: NikkiGlaser.com
• YouTube: Watch full episodes of the podcast
• Social Media: Follow @nikkiglaserpod on Instagram, Twitter, and Facebook

---

Note: The transcript provided included numerous advertisements and non-content segments. This summary intentionally excludes those sections to focus solely on the engaging and meaningful content discussed by Nikki Glaser and her co-hosts.

Transcript

[Nikki Glaser]

This is Ashley Echenetti from the Ben and Ashley I Almost Famous podcast. Have you ever thought about your relationship with money? What if I told you that was the one thing that could change everything about your financial situation? Dow Janes is here to help you unlearn what you think you know about money. Founders Brit and Lorianne are on a mission to get more money in the hands of more women. Through their free online classes, they teach you how to overcome financial fears, tackle debt, and learn to Invest. Go to dowjanes.comashley for access to their free class. That is dowjanes.com ashley Unlike what you're.

[Brian Frangie]

Listening to, T Mobile's coverage is no joke because T Mobile helps keep you connected from the heart of Portland to right where you are on America's largest 5G network. Switch now keep your phone and T Mobile will pay it off at the $800 per line via prepaid card. Visit your local T Mobile location or learn more@t mobile.com keepandswitch up to 4 lines via virtual prepaid card. Last 15 days qualifying unlock device credit service report in 90 days device knowledgeable carrier and timely redemption Required card is no cash access and expires in six months.

[Commercial Voice]

Tired of restless nights? At Lisa, they know good sleep is essential for mental, physical and emotional health. From memory foam mattresses to hybrids that keep you cool all night long, Lisa' mattresses offer exceptional comfort and support with free delivery and 100 nights to try out your mattress in the comfort of your home. Go to leesa.com today and get 20% off all mattresses and two free pillows. That's le.com and use code IHEART for an extra $50 off your purchase. Remember, no matter who you are, there's a Lisa just for you.

[Nikki Glaser]

Clorox CVA smells like lavender, cleans like Clorox, and feels like, hmm.

[Noah]

All right, that could go on for a while. Experience the long lasting freshness of Clorox Scentiva. Now available in Clorox Scentiva Lavender Scented Bleach. Use as directed.

[Nikki Glaser]

The Nikki Glaser Podcast.

[Noah]

Here'S Nikki.

[Nikki Glaser]

Hello, here I am. Welcome to the show. It's the Nikki Glaser Podcast. I haven't washed my hair in four days. Since Sunday. It's Wednesday. Seems about right. I'm trying to get all the way to tomorrow, so I just have to wash it before my show because washing your hair, it's just too much of a process to have to dry it in order for it to look good. You must dry it and I don't feel like, drying. I get really depressed at how much hair comes out when I do dry it. So I just like to save that for once. And then. And then I'll have to. And then I can't just like before. So I'm performing on Friday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday. I'm not gonna be able to like, make one of those washes last till the next day. I always have clean hair for the stage. It just gives me a boost of confidence to have, like, a blowout that I give myself sadly in my hotel room. But that's not sad. It is sad. It's sad because it's like. Because it's just, like, not. I'm bent over, I'm naked. I'm like, second guessing everything. My hair keeps getting tangled into the brush. My hair then tangles into the. The. The hair dryer that I have to use from the hotel. And I would say 89 of the time at hotels, the hair dryer sucks and is disgusting. No matter how nice of the hotel you're staying at is, no one can get it right. Even if there is a little nozzle attachment, which I need for a good blowout. It. Most of the time that is missing. It's not even in the pouch. Yeah, it just sucks. And I. And people go, oh, just bring your own hair dryer. I know Emily's gonna be like, message me as soon as she hears this. Do you. Should we add a hairdryer to your bag of things? I guess, but like, it's just another thing to bring. But I guess that I started using.

[Noah]

A blow dryer and a brush in one, and it's a game changer, I gotta say.

[Nikki Glaser]

Is that the thing? You got me?

[Noah]

Yes.

[Nikki Glaser]

Oh, my God. Okay, I need to use that. I get scared of it because I get scared that it doesn't get tangled too much over around it.

[Noah]

It won't.

[Nikki Glaser]

And get stuck. And then I'll have to, like, stop and unwind it because it, like, gets too tangled.

[Noah]

Your hair will get caught in it the same way it gets caught in a round brush. Yeah, but it's so much more convenient than having two tools and having to do, like, a crazy maneuver.

[Nikki Glaser]

Oh, my God. And just the sad.

[Noah]

Yeah, I get it.

[Nikki Glaser]

My hair is just so not thin, thick the way it used to be. But you have extensions. How do you blow dry extensions?

[Noah]

The same way I would my hair.

[Nikki Glaser]

Really? Yeah, but, like, where are they attached? Like, does it ever pull on the attached part?

[Noah]

No. I mean, I also have, like, a head of steel at this point. I can't really feel pain in my head, but I just kind of do it gently. And also I. I hold the part closer to my scalp and I could, you know, pull the knots out of the extensions.

[Nikki Glaser]

Get less dirty than your actual hair because I find that when I wear clip in extensions, I never have to wash them. Literally ever, ever. They never get greasy.

[Noah]

I only wash my hair once a week.

[Nikki Glaser]

So the only hair that's really getting dirty is this, the hair that's attached to your scalp.

[Noah]

Exactly.

[Nikki Glaser]

Naturally, it's getting weird. So why. So even the end of your hair is dirty because it is attached to your scalp? Because even the ends of my fake hair are always clean as a whistle. And then the ends of my real will be dirty. So it's all connected to your scalp.

[Noah]

Yeah. But I will say if I go to, like, a house that's kind of like, you know, has, like, the smell of cooking or if we're cooking and stuff, then that stench stays in my hair and I have to wash it.

[Nikki Glaser]

Oh, I don't even think about that. I never think about how I smell. And that's probably why no one's ever told me I smell good.

[Brian Frangie]

Well, you know, that hair is, you know, poor. First of all, it's covered in oils, and it. It really is just kind of like. Like waste. It's like your body. It's like your fingernails that you can cut off.

[Nikki Glaser]

Disgusting.

[Brian Frangie]

Yeah.

[Noah]

It's, like, healthy, isn't it? It's kind of healthy to keep it on. Otherwise, why would our bodies make it?

[Nikki Glaser]

But, like, think about the difference between finding someone else's hair in your salad as opposed to your own hair. My own hair does not bother me at all. I just feel like, ew, gross. But someone else's hair just. I'll never eat a salad again. But it's like, who really cares? That's why I literally don't care when I found hair in my food. Yeah, I was just speaking like other people before. I don't care when I find hair in my food because I'm like, it's just hair. It's like, it's kind of gross, but it doesn't really ruin it for me. I just take it off. And I hope that no one else sees it, because if people see me take off a hair and then keep eating, they go, oh, my God. And I'm like, I don't want to wait for them to make a whole other one and, like, throw this out because I, like, need to be an entitled bitch right now. And.

[Brian Frangie]

Yeah.

[Nikki Glaser]

And, like, I Just think that. Just get over it. Your food has bugs in it. It has dirt, it has spit, it has feces. Like, your food is contaminated.

[Brian Frangie]

There's certain foods that if it had a hair in it, it would be worse than others. Like, I think I wouldn't eat a hair that was in, like, a soup. Like, if it was in the soup, because I feel like it would get mixed up in the broth if it wasn't like a salad.

[Nikki Glaser]

You would never be able to tell.

[Brian Frangie]

If there was a hair in my soup.

[Nikki Glaser]

No, like, if you. There's a hair in your soup and you got. Someone took it and saw it, and I took it out and you didn't see me take it out, the soup would not taste different to you. You would not die of anything that you would have died from before. Like, it's like, it just is, you.

[Brian Frangie]

Know, it's all mental, for sure.

[Noah]

Right?

[Nikki Glaser]

Then let's all get over it and let's start freaking out about germs.

[Noah]

I'm also less repulsed by a long hair than a short hair. If I find a short hair, it's like, question, it might be a pube.

[Nikki Glaser]

Maybe worse because it's more bacteria, more oils and pube. I'm just like, it's not a pube. It's just a short. It's like a short guy's hair. It's so funny that we instantly think black short hair is pube when it could be beard, most likely its beard, and it's short guy hair. But women don't have short hair, so they don't understand it. Out of sight of pubes.

[Brian Frangie]

I. I think there's nothing grosser than when, like, if you go over to someone's house or if you have a guest and you go into the bathroom and there's little short hairs on the. On the bathroom counter or by the grosser. There's nothing grosser. I don't even think if they took a. On the counter, I think I'd be less grossed out because at least I. At least I know they meant it.

[Nikki Glaser]

Oh, God. I just don't. I. I would. I just don't care about that stuff. I think that short hairs. I think, like, stains in a toilet bowl are grosser when you're at the stain.

[Brian Frangie]

Man, it sucks when there's a stain. You have a stain and you don't realize it and you have guests over and they're like, oh, my God, there was always stain in there the whole time.

[Nikki Glaser]

Literally every time someone uses my bathroom, which I hope would be Never. I don't like having people over. I don't like company. But when they do come over or be like, or you know, I have hair and makeup people come to my room and they're like, can I use your bathroom? I'm like, they're sorry if there's piss in the toilet. I just don't flush the toilet literally ever.

[Noah]

Ever.

[Brian Frangie]

Well, you're like, I'm always peeing on.

[Nikki Glaser]

Top of my pee.

[Brian Frangie]

I mean you, your time spent in the bathroom I think is like a record. Record levels whether it's showering or pissing. I mean sometimes, yeah, it's almost like I have you started. Sometimes I'll be talking to you.

[Nikki Glaser]

Yeah.

[Brian Frangie]

And you'll start a sentence. You'll go to the bathroom and piss or even shower.

[Nikki Glaser]

Yeah.

[Brian Frangie]

And you'll finish the sentence. You want to pick it up. The sentence won't be over by the time you're out of the bathroom.

[Nikki Glaser]

Other people are doing in showers. I truly, I've discussed it before. I don't know what to do in there. I get everything I need to get done and I don't know what people are doing. People are just sit, standing in the shower and just thinking. And you're telling me these people struggle to meditate. That's crazy what you're doing right there. Just sitting in the shower with your eyes closed like you are meditating. You sir, are a master of your own domain. If you are able to. I'm so bored in there. I can't.

[Brian Frangie]

I do hot showers or cold showers.

[Nikki Glaser]

Of course I do hot showers. I would never do cold showers. Kirsten's always trying to suggest cold showers on the girls chat and I'm like, that's the one self help thing I will literally never get behind. I don't care what it does for me. It's so torturous. I don't like it. I will never do it. I can't.

[Brian Frangie]

No, it's crazy. Maybe it shocked your system. You go, you do get a look at that joke.

[Noah]

Yeah, that's good.

[Brian Frangie]

And then the day is. I don't know if that's good for you or what.

[Nikki Glaser]

But I guess I think it's very good for you. I think it's like total circulation. It's like that little chill pill thing. Like it's shocking. It makes you feel a pain that you cannot be distracted by anything else ever. All of your worries seem inconsequential because of the pain of the shower. I'd rather do a plank class that is going to give Me results in my muscle tone and my body definition. And it's definitely excruciating than standing in a cold shower. I just. I can't. I just will not do it. And by the way, we're all going to whatever. My shower is kind of cold and there's not enough hot water. I just always think about what's going to happen with the water wars coming up. Where it's like, we will not have. Where it's like, if things are going the way I think they're going in this country, like, we won't have hot water. I'm just trying to enjoy hot showers now. I'll be doing cold plunges the rest of my life when.

[Brian Frangie]

When we are not enjoying the hot shower because you're doing it so fast. The true enjoyment of a hot shower is standing in the shower and just letting your day pass by while the warmth takes you over.

[Nikki Glaser]

No. Okay, well, here's the thing.

[Brian Frangie]

Essentially pass away.

[Nikki Glaser]

But don't you feel like. I feel like I'm wasting time and I feel like. I guess some people might think of showers as, like, this is me time. No one can get to me. This is the one time I have for myself. Like, no one's going to interrupt me. It's like the airplane. Really? No. Yes. To me, an airplane. Is that. To me napping? Is that. I just sent Anya a. There's a guy that does these, like, things on the subway where he's like, asks you to have a take. Have you seen this? Where it's like, what's your strong opinion? And then he either 100 disagrees or 100 agrees.

[Brian Frangie]

And if he disagrees, he lights you on fire.

[Nikki Glaser]

Yeah, I think that. I think that's what happened.

[Brian Frangie]

That guy was.

[Nikki Glaser]

That. Was that one homeless woman who got lit on fire. Yeah, she was. She had a. A strong take about something. She. She thought that the new season White Lotus seemed promising or something like that. Anyway, which it does.

[Brian Frangie]

There's only one episode out. Right.

[Nikki Glaser]

I love it.

[Brian Frangie]

Okay. I mean, but.

[Nikki Glaser]

Okay, so this guy had a strong take with. He was doing Cassie David. Larry David's daughter had a such a Larry David take.

[Brian Frangie]

Yes.

[Nikki Glaser]

I don't mean to take anything from her by saying that. I think I would be annoyed if I was her. And every time I said something interesting, people were like, that's so your dad. I'd be like, well, or it's me. But she was saying that she hates naps and, like, people take naps are losers. Like, I felt so called out. She thinks that, like, you wake up from a nap disoriented. It's like, it's. It's just. You sleep at night, you're supposed to sleep at night. Like, you're just like. Every time you wake up from a nap, you're just like, what? You look stupid. You're a fool. And they're, they're. Naps are for babies and, and dogs, but not fully grown humans, like, grow.

[Brian Frangie]

Up and sleep at night, people. Once you get to a certain age, you gotta have that nap. You gotta have your afternoon nap. My, like, my neighbor who's now 91, I think she takes a nap every day from 2:30 to 4. And I think it's honestly been one of the things when you rob her, that's when I. That's when I go in and I take all of her jewels. And it really is sad because she's running out of jewels. And it's like, how much longer is this gonna go on for?

[Nikki Glaser]

Well, she threw them all in the ocean at the end of that movie. Yeah, well, it's okay. It's. I think naps. I love naps. But I also heard what Cassie was saying and I was like, oh, she's someone who doesn't. Can't nap. Like, she. I don't wake up from naps groggy. I don't wake up being like, who am I? What am I doing? I wasted my day. I can't get back on. Like, I can take a nap for 15 minutes and then go down and do a Pilates class right away. I can take a nap for 20 minutes and like feel totally refreshed and then perform on stage. I don't need like a. I don't need this like, refractory period. I think that's a word that I thought I was using. Right. But it doesn't feel right.

[Brian Frangie]

Yeah, refractory. That's not right at all. In fact, refract. I think refractory is like something to do with like, light being changing the.

[Nikki Glaser]

Maybe metaphorically, it works anyway. I don't need that. I don't need that at all. I can.

[Brian Frangie]

Recovery period is what you meant to say.

[Nikki Glaser]

But, like, maybe it makes sense in some way. I can't look it up right now, but I think maybe I'm going to look it up later and prove myself that I was maybe right, but not in a way I thought I was the other night.

[Noah]

You. The definition, if you want, of refractory. Yeah. Well, Nikki said refractory periods. Yeah.

[Nikki Glaser]

What does that mean?

[Brian Frangie]

Okay.

[Noah]

A period immediately following stimulation during which a nerve or muscle is under. Responsive to further stimulation.

[Brian Frangie]

That's actually much closer than I thought.

[Nikki Glaser]

Yeah. Is there another kind of definition that makes sense?

[Brian Frangie]

Is there an alternate. Because it's the opposite of what you meant?

[Noah]

Yes, I do have one. Refractory period is usually the recovery phase after orgasm, during which it is physiologically impossible for males to have additional orgasms.

[Nikki Glaser]

Okay, that's kind of where I got it from. I was listening to something talk about orgasm and it was. Someone mentioned refractory.

[Brian Frangie]

That's actually much closer. When you initially said it, I was thinking like light being being like angled differently because it hits a mirror. But what you said. I think what you said makes. Is it actually very close to being a proper use of the phrase? I rescind my comment.

[Nikki Glaser]

Thank you. What does resend mean? Just kidding.

[Brian Frangie]

No, so I rescind is how you feel after you orgasm.

[Nikki Glaser]

I don't, I don't need. I don't need that. So I do agree. And then I send it to Anya and Anya said she also doesn't nap. And I have always secretly been really jealous of people. Envious of people, I should say. Jealous is when you are. Someone has something that you think is going to take from you. So I guess it is jealousy because they are having more time in the day, which is taking from me. So I'll stick with jealous. I'm jealous of people who don't need naps because I feel like napping is a sign of laziness, which is my biggest core fear about myself. And I'm jealous of people who just seem to not need as much rest as I do.

[Brian Frangie]

And, well, 15 minutes, 20 minutes. That's the proper amount of time you're supposed to take to nap.

[Nikki Glaser]

Yeah, but I'm not doing that.

[Brian Frangie]

You're going longer.

[Noah]

How long are they?

[Nikki Glaser]

Yesterday I took three naps because I was depressed. And honestly, napping really helps my depression because a lot of times I think being depressed is just being underslept. And So I slept three separate times yesterday and each was about 45 minutes and they were great. And each time I woke up, I was a little bit happier. And I was like, I told Chris, I think I'm 20% feeling better. And now I'm another 20%. And I was finally, by the end of the day, like 75% happier than the start of the day because of those that just getting that extra rest and just having that moment where I was like, for me, I was telling Anya, like, naps are airplane mode. They are like, they are that time in the shower when no one can get to me. Like, I am napping right now, so it's like my, my brain is able to shut off. Anya said she can't imagine being able to shut your brain off in the middle of the day. And for me, it is, like, so easy to do. It's like closing a working laptop. It just, everything shuts down. It's not even optional for me to worry when I'm napping. Like, it's like it's. I don't know what my brain does, but it doesn't allow me to keep thinking about the thing I'm nervous about. It's like it lets me have a vacation from all my worries.

[Brian Frangie]

Yeah. I mean, tata hakuna matata. Yeah. I mean, it is. I think also when you're depressed, all the nap rules are thrown out the window. You got. It's like having a cold and saying, like, oh, do I have to still go to the gym today when I'm sick? It's like, no, the rules are changed because you're feeling this way.

[Nikki Glaser]

Yeah. I think that I don't get colds very often. I got one, you know, a couple of weeks ago and I really learned a lot about myself in it because I was like, I wasn't feeling physically, like, I wasn't. My body wasn't tired, but I was just, I, I, maybe I wasn't registering it because I'm not in touch with my body, but I couldn't go work out. I couldn't. I needed to lay down a lot more. And I, my brain wasn't wanting me to because my brain was fine and was like, you should go to the classes. You should do the things. And I realized depression is like a brain cold. And I need to honor it and lay down and drink fluids and be like, gentle with myself. But it's just so hard not to. But I. Do you guys ever nap? Noah, you don't nap.

[Noah]

I can't. I actually envy people who can nap. And this is a household of a napper and a non napper. And it's been really obvious, oh, he's, he's got to have a nap at the end of next couple. Yeah, couple. And if he doesn't, he just can't do anything after work. He's just like, like a zombie and it totally revives him. And I just can't. If, if I were to lay down for a nap, I just want like eight hours of sleep.

[Nikki Glaser]

Yeah. Just for me. It's like a little piece of chocolate After a meal, like it's a little treat that. It's like at the end of the rainbow, I get a treat. Like I get to reward myself with a nap. And it's like it just it. And I will say that it never feels like it's enough at the beginning where I'm like, I only have 40 minutes. It always is like, it's. You don't. Don't underestimate that. You should try napping. Have you tried or.

[Noah]

I do. And I, and I. I actually took a nap last week and I regretted it because I woke up even more tired than when I went to sleep.

[Nikki Glaser]

Well, I just needed a fudgeing, real good rest.

[Noah]

Yeah, I just need like a full sleep, like to turn the daytime.

[Brian Frangie]

You got a baby.

[Nikki Glaser]

Yeah.

[Brian Frangie]

Thing is, like, not the same for you. I mean, you're. You've got a baby, so it's like you're gonna be. You're tired all the time. You're constantly. Oh my gosh, Responsible for this thing.

[Noah]

I mean, I was thinking about it. I've only had interrupted sleep for about a year now. I would say since like seven months of pregnancy. I haven't slept through the whole night. Like, oh my sleep. I'm probably losing my mind, you guys.

[Nikki Glaser]

Yeah, but are you so tired that you like fall asleep watching tv? Like when I get tired, like, how are you staying awake then?

[Noah]

There's just something in my brain that's keeping me up. I do like instinct. Yeah, exactly. I can't. I. I mean, I just pass out like around 10 o'clock at night and then I wake up like around 11:30. And then I get.

[Nikki Glaser]

I would be.

[Noah]

And then I get biggest ever. I am.

[Nikki Glaser]

If I didn't sleep, I would just be an awful person to everyone I know and love if I wasn't getting adequate sleep. So ironic that you have to like, you become a mother and you're supposed to be like, full of love and like, just like this matriarch of the family that is keeping everything together and just loving everything. Being so strong and like it just being tired weakens you incredibly and it makes you so unprepared to do.

[Brian Frangie]

And we wonder. We wonder why so many kids are fucked up and have to go to therapy when it's like your parents for the first several years of your life were exhausted the whole time.

[Nikki Glaser]

I just. That's just. Does not seem worth it to me. I just. I like sleeping way too much and I, I just, I would ra. I just can't imagine sacrificing that But I guess you just don't feel it because I never. I hear you guys say you're tired, but you don't ever seem to do anything about it because you just can't.

[Brian Frangie]

Yeah, right.

[Nikki Glaser]

That's the difference. Like you can't complain too much or let it in that you're so sleep deprived because what are you going to do about it? It's kind of let your babies starve.

[Noah]

I think you'd understand. It's like you and getting sick, I think could be like a similar comparison where you just like have not let it in and I, I just don't let it in. I'm just like, I'm fine. You know, like mind over matter, just running on adrenaline.

[Brian Frangie]

It's like when you're prepping for something, you know, and you're going 100 miles an hour and you just like, there's no time to even think about stopping. And then when it's over, then all of a sudden ever your adrenaline drains from your body and you become a, A husk zombie like thing.

[Nikki Glaser]

Well, it's Tom Brady. I saw him being interviewed about his first Super Bowl. He took a 15 minute nap before.

[Brian Frangie]

Yeah.

[Nikki Glaser]

To play did.

[Brian Frangie]

Yeah. That was pre Super Bowl B roll or whatever. Pre tape.

[Nikki Glaser]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Brian Frangie]

He said that he was. And then everyone was like, what the. How are you able to nap? And he was like, well, because I was too young and dumb to understand that this was important.

[Nikki Glaser]

So I was like, I don't think that's true.

[Brian Frangie]

You think he lied there?

[Nikki Glaser]

How would he not know it's important. How would he not know his first Super Bowl? I don't think he was lying. I just think he doesn't understand why he was able to do that. I think thrust into this starting before he got anxiety.

[Brian Frangie]

Yeah. Because he. When you're.

[Nikki Glaser]

That I think he understood the important. I don't think equals. You get. You understand important importance of something more. It just means like you more fucked up.

[Brian Frangie]

I think the anxiety was lower because he felt like, oh, I got here my first year as a starter, that means I'm going to get here. So almost every year I'll get, oh.

[Nikki Glaser]

Maybe he's practical about it.

[Brian Frangie]

Yeah. So. And then he didn't realize until later, until after, you know, he had that big long gap or he wasn't in the super bowl that he's like, oh my God, this is special and really hard to get to. And so I shouldn't take a nap beforehand because, you know, he just kind of. He listens to Kazi I mean, that's his. That's been his monster his whole career.

[Nikki Glaser]

All right, we got to go.

[Noah]

Break.

[Nikki Glaser]

We'll be back after this. Tired of restless nights? At Leesa, they know good sleep is essential for mental, physical, and emotional health. From memory foam mattresses to hybrids that keep you cool all night long, Lisa's mattresses offer exceptional comfort and support with free delivery and 100 nights to try out your mattress in the comfort of your home. Go to leesa.com today and get 20% off all mattresses and two free pillows. That's leash E-E-S-A.com and use code iheart for an extra $50 off your purchase. Remember, no matter who you are, there's a Leesa just for you.

[Commercial Voice]

Hey, everybody. So when you get asked, what is Odoo? What comes to mind? Well, I'll tell you. Odoo is a bit of everything. Odoo is a suite of business management software that some people say is like fertilizer because the way it promotes growth. But, you know, some people also say that Odoo is like a magic beanstalk because it grows with your company and is also magically affordable.

Ooh. But then again, you could look at Odoo in terms of how its individual software programs are a lot like building blocks. Whatever your business needs, manufacturing, accounting, HR programs, you can build a custom software suite that's perfect for your company. So what is Odoo? Well, Odoo is a bit of everything. Odoo is a fertilizer. Magic beanstalk. Building blocks for business. Yeah, that's it.

Which means that Odoo is exactly what every business needs. Learn more and sign up [e-mail] that's o-o o.com.

During tax season, your sensitive info does a lot of traveling to places you can't control, stopping off at payroll, your accountant or tax preparer, and countless other data centers on its way to the irs. Any of them can expose you to identity theft because they all have the info on your W2. Just the ticket for criminals to steal your identity. No wonder the IRS reported tax fraud due to identity theft. Went up 20% last year. You need Lifelock. They monitor millions of data points per second and alert you to threats you could miss if your identity is stolen. LifeLock's US based restoration specialists will fix it, backed by the million dollar protection package. And restoration is guaranteed or your money back. Don't let identity thieves take you for a ride. Get Lifelock protection for tax season and beyond. Join now and save up to 40% your first year. Call 1-800-LIFELOCK and use promo code iheart or go to lifelock.com iheart for 40% off terms apply.

My best friend died suddenly and now his wife and kids have to move out of their house. I had no idea he didn't have life insurance. If I could go back, I'd tell him how easy and affordable protecting your family can be. With select quote in 15 minutes, a licensed insurance agent found me a $500,000 life insurance policy for only $18 a month. They compare many of the nation's most highly rated insurance carriers to find the right coverage and price for your needs. In the last 40 years, they've helped more than 2 million families secure over 700 billion do in coverage. Even if you have a health concern, SelectQuote agents can find you the right policy at the lowest price. Don't wait until it's too late. Get peace of mind that your loved ones are protected with life insurance. Go to selectquote.com to get your free quote today. That's selectquote.com selectquote.com details on example [e-mail].

[Nikki Glaser]

Noah shared on Girls Jet today a picture of herself from the weekend where she did her makeup and she went kind of like a little bit harder than usual. Yeah, I went to that.

[Noah]

I went to, I went to a birthday party and it was themed. So like the theme was Valentine's Day fairy. And what I was telling the theme. Well, it's just like my friend, it's.

[Nikki Glaser]

Like when Kirsten went to the zoo and she was like, the theme tonight is octopus. And was like, what are you talking about?

[Brian Frangie]

They were like, the theme is zoo.

[Nikki Glaser]

There was like a zoo function, like a, like, I guess they do like jazz zoo in, in Kansas City. Like a jazz night at the zoo. And everybody goes to the zoo and they drink and they hang out, they walk around at night and it's like.

[Brian Frangie]

An adult animals awake.

[Nikki Glaser]

And she was like, yeah, and tonight's theme is octopus. And we were all like, huh, what, what, what does that even mean? And then she got there and the theme was indeed octopus. I mean there are people wearing octopus themed clothing and, and different like tentacles on everything. So Valentine's Day fairy was a theme. What are men supposed to do with that?

[Noah]

So it was an all girls gathering. There was no, no guys allowed for.

[Brian Frangie]

A birthday or for Valentine's Day.

[Noah]

You're saying it was for a birthday party? It was like just a small gathering and my friend likes to dress up and stuff.

[Brian Frangie]

So I was always for her, and she wants to have a theme, and it's her birthday. So now everyone's gonna go glam up, go to this party and be a.

[Nikki Glaser]

Fairy and try to nail this theme that it seems very. It's open to many different interpretations.

[Noah]

Yeah.

[Brian Frangie]

You dress up like Cupid, right?

[Nikki Glaser]

Yeah.

[Brian Frangie]

Fairy.

[Noah]

Oh, yeah. Well, isn't he an angel? A cherub.

[Nikki Glaser]

He's a little fat.

[Brian Frangie]

He's a cherub.

[Nikki Glaser]

Yeah.

[Brian Frangie]

Very few people know what he is. They've been trying to figure out that valentine.

[Nikki Glaser]

The story of it is, like, tragic, where it's like, there was a St. Valentine who was, like, marrying people, and the church didn't like that he was doing this, so they forbade him to and put him to death or something like that. That's what it comes from.

[Brian Frangie]

I heard that it was a guy.

[Nikki Glaser]

That, like, believed in love and wanted to marry people and, like, got shut down for doing it.

[Brian Frangie]

So that's why he's got the. I heard that.

[Nikki Glaser]

I don't know. Some asmrtist was whispering about it.

[Brian Frangie]

Okay.

[Nikki Glaser]

So who knows?

[Brian Frangie]

Trust them. You don't know.

[Nikki Glaser]

Yeah, they were. They were eating a cake and telling me about the. Actually, I was reading about it because they're all. They're all, like, Chinese, and so they don't speak English. So they write out their captions, and then the captions are translated. And then you read what they're thinking while they're eating. But it can't possibly be what they're thinking while they're eating because they put in the captions after they've already are editing the photo, the video. But it's so interesting because I just watch these people read the. I watch their thought processes while they're eating. I just can't recommend enough. So anyway, no, I went to this party.

[Noah]

Okay. So I went to this party, and I just exaggerated my makeup. And what I was trying to say on Girls Chat is that I had this realization that, like, I've been doing my makeup the same way for so long.

[Nikki Glaser]

Yeah.

[Noah]

And it's just kind of time for me to retire what I'm doing regularly. And my question was, like, have. Has anyone else done that with their makeup? Change it up. Or your style. Like a hat that you keep wearing, or like, just certain clothes and stuff where you just kind of realize, like, I think I've outgrown this. Or I'm just like, yes, looking like I'm trying to dress. I guess I just keep imagining, like, those old talk shows where kids bring their Parents on for a makeover because they dress wear.

[Nikki Glaser]

Those two sex now. Yes. They never let go of, like, this one style where they learned, like, they got. They got fitted. They got, like, some advice at one point. They really looked good. They got a lot of positive affirmation about that kind of, like, look, and then they. They're too scared to go away from it.

[Noah]

Right. Or I'm just, like, used to it. This is just what I know.

[Brian Frangie]

Tough party, though. I mean, I. I also went to the party, and I. I was embarrassed because I thought the theme was octopus, and so I was walking around.

[Nikki Glaser]

Yeah.

[Brian Frangie]

Ate tentacles.

[Nikki Glaser]

Your makeup style has not changed, Brian. Through the years, I think you've been doing the same kind of thing.

[Brian Frangie]

You know, sometimes I think about that. Well, it kind of. Not really, but I think about. I watch, like, videos of, like, chapel roan and stuff, and I'm like, someday they'll be 50. And everything that was. Is cool right now will be not cool. Slash made fun of by whoever is not born yet.

[Nikki Glaser]

No, I think it will be retro, and people will be doing what she's doing in homage.

[Brian Frangie]

I think after long enough, it becomes retro. But I think about, like, there are some. There are millennial things right now that are lame. That people are TikTok ridicules. A lot of the millennial tropes that people. And it's like, these are like. Like, I think about, like, the coolest people from my high school and how cool they were back then. How cool. Like, if I was interviewed by someone when I was, like, 19 in college, they were like, whatever he thinks is cool. And now you look back on those things yet all. And, like, all these things that if you go to, like, a millennial party and you do and you're doing millennial things, it's, like, lame now.

[Nikki Glaser]

No, this is what I always do. I always try to. Whenever I get threatened by something because it's cool or popular, like, it. I always just realize, don't worry, it'll be taken from them. They won't be cool at some point. They won't be the it girl. They. And I do it for myself. Like, I was just having an interview where the woman was like, this is your year. And I was like, it's gonna go away. Like, I. I got offered to do this thing. I was just talking to Chris about this last night. I got offered to. I was just talking about, like, I'm just, like, kind of overworked right now, and I'm like, when you reach a level where people are like, finally recognize, like, you're good to be on shows. They ask you to do all the shows, and all these shows that you've always been wanting to be a regular on are. Start asking, and you're like, well, I can't do a show a week where I have to fly to New York or la, and I have to also get fitted for it. I have to be in hair and makeup. I also have to come up with, like, funny stories, do a creative call, practice the stories, write them. Then the day of, you have to, like, it's just you. Then you gotta post about. It's like, it's exhausting to just appear on one show. And so. And also you have to worry about, like, oversaturating and people getting sick of you. And so this is. We were having this conversation about, well, you're gonna pick and choose, like, what you're gonna do. You can't do everything anymore, even though I want to. And then as I'm having this conversation, I checked my email and an offer came up for the show that I love doing and I've loved doing. And I'm scared to ever say no because it was something that I was so grateful to ever even get asked in the first place. But I'm like, I'm gonna say no because I just don't. I think that I, I can't. I'm, like, looking at how much I'm gonna be on TV coming up, and I'm like, it's too much and I gotta pull back a little bit.

[Brian Frangie]

You gotta go back.

[Nikki Glaser]

It will. So, yeah, like, everything that's cool will not be at some point. And I'm just trying to, you know, the refractory period. I'm trying to make long, I'm trying.

[Brian Frangie]

To make it longer before people want.

[Nikki Glaser]

To come to whatever I do again. Yeah.

[Brian Frangie]

Yes.

[Nikki Glaser]

But anyway, makeup and style, like, no, I, I. Emily has injected some, like, kind of Gen Z energy into my life. In fact, I actually. She made me throw out all my granny shoes that were just these, like, plain white Reeboks that I had literally 20 pairs of. She made me get rid of all of those. And then I saw yesterday a Gen Z girl wearing them, and I sent a screenshot and I was like, see, Fran's wearing these shoes or whoever it was. Fran sounds. Does not sound like a Gen Z's name, but it was. Or maybe it was Maria. It was either Maria or Fran.

[Brian Frangie]

On a lot of Gen Z's, people's names are like the names of our.

[Nikki Glaser]

Grandson, the office girls. Yes, yes. Oh, yeah, because that's coming back around.

[Brian Frangie]

Gertrude is, you know, like.

[Nikki Glaser]

Yeah, I was like pearls wearing her side part. And so. But she was like, no, you're not allowed to do that anymore. And so I, I've gotten a lot of different new style tips from her, of course, but, but oftentimes I feel like she goes, no, you are not a millennial. You are Gen Z at heart. You don't look ridiculous when you wear Gen Z things. I think that sometimes I do. And it's hard for me to know my age because I do stunted. Maturity wise, I don't feel like a real adult. I'm all. And then sometimes I can be really adult and then I feel like it ages me and it makes me act a little bit different if I dress differently.

[Brian Frangie]

Where do you think you are?

[Nikki Glaser]

I mean, I'm solidly. This is the interesting thing. I am. I'm stopped at 17. I think everyone. You can kind of pinpoint where they stopped or something happened to them and they are frozen. I determined this weekend. We went. We ran around the van this weekend and, and told all my openers where they were stopped. Maturity wise, including Emily and Chris. I don't think we did Chris, but good. Mine's 17, but it appears to be 13, so I. Because I was a late bloomer. So it truly is. 17 year old me is where it kind of clicked and that's where I am. But it looks like a 13 year old because I was not acting like a 17 year old when I was 17. I was, I was, I didn't act like a 17.

[Brian Frangie]

I agree with that. I think that's 30. 17 is a good, A good range. It's tough for me because I, I started at 78.

[Nikki Glaser]

So you are, you are. To me, I would say.

[Brian Frangie]

I don't think I'm done.

[Nikki Glaser]

11.

[Brian Frangie]

11.

[Nikki Glaser]

Yeah. How vibe of like this. This is how I determine it. I blur my eyes. And the way you walk and the way you stand and the way you like sit. It's like really about almost like the physicality. If you were to like blur your eyes and see that person's skeleton shrunk down, what size, you know, it's almost like when.

[Brian Frangie]

So this is more of like a physical thing and not enough.

[Nikki Glaser]

It's like physical like how people. No, it's like, it's, it's the whole vibe. But body language. Easy way. Yeah. Body language is a good way to determine like I'm always kind of just like angsty, like, like I'm sticking out my hips and I'm crossing my arms. And I think that that's a great Emily. Emily's always kind of like, tucking her hair behind her ears, and I'm like, she's seven. She's squarely seven to nine. Like, adorable, like, and kind of, like, doing this with her hands. And, like, she hasn't. Her body language. Isn't the shrunken girl that's ashamed of her body teenager or angry because she doesn't have boobs yet. Like, it's still, like, this kind of, like, precocious, innocent kind of vibe. Doesn't mean she doesn't have insecurities. And she doesn't. She's not a mature woman. She like. But that's what her essence is. It's like she is kind of frozen there. Noah, you are of. To my assessment. I don't know if this.

[Brian Frangie]

I have a number in my head.

[Noah]

Okay. Yeah, tell me.

[Nikki Glaser]

Okay, hold on. Let me get my number, and then we'll say it at the same time. Noah. Okay. Okay. I'll. I'll go three, two, one, four.

[Brian Frangie]

Nine. I said nine. You said four.

[Nikki Glaser]

Four. A meek four. A very mature four. So maybe nine, but, like, still little girl. Not a. Not angsty. Not.

[Brian Frangie]

So this is definitely all. You're not gonna go over, like, 25 on this?

[Nikki Glaser]

No, never. You're never gonna go 18. This is, like, where you and your adolescence, like, where something kind of traumatic happened and you kind of froze.

[Brian Frangie]

When I was 11, that's when my. When I realized my parents were divorced. That's when, like, the actual.

[Nikki Glaser]

Dude, I nailed it.

[Brian Frangie]

I thought my parents were together that whole time.

[Nikki Glaser]

That's right. Yeah, that's right.

[Brian Frangie]

Maybe that's when. Yeah, so that's when I stopped.

[Nikki Glaser]

Are you really about. Do you love or not love? Are you. Are you very keen to wanting to know what's going on at all times, like, knowing the score because you felt left out of the loop about that and you maybe were like. I would think if I was assessing you, but I don't think this tracks for you that you want to know at all times now, like, what's happening so that you don't get blindsided again.

[Brian Frangie]

Yeah, no, that's like, my whole thing. It's like, I hate. The number one thing I. That really hurts me is being. Is feeling like I'm left out of the loop. Not I don't.

[Nikki Glaser]

Information or like, a party.

[Brian Frangie]

Like, the. Like here an example is the worst case scenario for me is I know someone's cheating on me, and they're not telling me because it's like this thing is happening and then they act like everything's fine. Or maybe they even act like more positive than normal and.

[Nikki Glaser]

Oh, God, yeah.

[Brian Frangie]

Because of this. I am. I am. I think. I don't want to pat myself in the back here. I think I am the number one judge of character that in. In my. In the country and in the continental United States, I. I can tell if someone's good or bad and I can sense how someone's feeling, like, instantaneously.

[Nikki Glaser]

Oh, I know. I think I have. I think I could beat you.

[Brian Frangie]

You could beat me in a contest.

[Nikki Glaser]

I really pride myself on not. Not if they're good or bad, but I think you probably have. Have a better sense of that. But I can tell if someone's uncomfortable.

[Brian Frangie]

Oh, sure, uncomfortable.

[Nikki Glaser]

I. I always on. On alert for that. That someone. Someone is judging someone around me. Like someone. Because I grew up with, like, being kind of embarrassed of my parents, I think at times. Not. Not any fault of their own, but like, not wanting people to think ill of my. And just picking up on if someone was going to shit talk my family and like.

[Brian Frangie]

Yeah.

[Nikki Glaser]

Noticing if someone thought something I said was weird. Not me. I probably don't pick up on me because I'm like, I'm perfect. But like, I'm looking up for other people judging my friends or someone judging. Yeah, that kind of.

[Brian Frangie]

Right. Okay. So. No, I'm not. We're not even the same sport here. That's not okay. Because I don't care if anyone's uncomfortable at any time. So that's not.

[Nikki Glaser]

Oh, yeah. Because I was gonna say I don't feel like you. I don't think that you're not good at knowing if people are uncomfortable. I think. Yeah, that's. It's more like you don't really care. Whereas I'm like, I need everyone to be comfortable at all times. I don't want anyone to ever feel left out or feel like they can't leave if they want to. Like, even this weekend we were going to the strip club or like, doing karaoke after the shows, and I was like, I just want to let you all know that you are not required to go to this. It will not affect you opening for me in the future or working for me in the future if you do not go to this hang or if you leave early. Like, I just want to make sure everyone knows that kind of stuff because I know I would hate someone to stay somewhere because they were scared of me.

[Brian Frangie]

Exactly. I mean. Yeah. I don't. The reason why I don't care if people are uncomfortable. Not because I don't care, like, oh, if someone's uncomfortable. I just, like, whatever. It's because I believe that everybody is in charge of themselves. No, that's comfortable. It's your responsibility to do something to make yourself not uncomfortable.

[Nikki Glaser]

No, it is not. It is my responsibility, Brian. It is my responsibility to make everyone comfortable because people do not stand up for themselves. So it is up to me.

[Brian Frangie]

Yeah.

[Nikki Glaser]

As an al. Anon to.

[Brian Frangie]

That's right.

[Nikki Glaser]

If someone doesn't like their food, I need to let them know, hey, I'll say something to the waiter about this food because I know you're a. And I want you to actually enjoy your meal. And I don't want. You have to, like, you know, like, I will take the hair out of your food and demand that you eat it, but if you still don't want to eat it, I will be the one to tell the waiter she doesn't want to eat this. And, like, I will be the one to tell the pilot, hey, we have someone on the plane that is uncomfortable. Like, and sometimes, yeah, the person probably doesn't want me to do that, but I take it upon myself because I feel like. Like, I. I'm always like. I think that's sometimes also why people are like, how do you do these roasts? How do you do stand up? How do you speak up? And it's from doing that of being like, I'm going to speak what other people are too scared to, because. And then they're just going to tough it out and white knuckle it and be uncomfortable because they don't want to ask for another chair, even though this chair hurts and there is a chair across the room, but that would draw too much attention to themselves. I'll be the one to get them that chair.

[Noah]

Yeah, Nikki's really good about that. As someone who has social anxiety, Nikki's, like, always been so cool about that. And you're really the first person to kind of, like, give someone an. Like an out. An out. Yes, an out. And yeah, like, now I. I will do that too. And I think. I think it's actually very helpful, especially in a setting where you're just kind of, like, getting to know people. And until you really, really know how they are.

[Nikki Glaser]

Yeah, just give people, like, I mean, they don't have to trust you. But being able to say to someone, like, it won't affect your standing with me if you go to this or not, or if you need to leave this early, or if you. Yeah, if you don't write back to this, like, I'll tell Emily, like, hey, can you give me an answer on this? I'm like, you don't need to do this tonight. Like, it will not affect your. My life or yours, whether you respond to me. Just giving people a little bit of outs, whether they take it or not. I mean, but back to that. Yeah. So, Noah, where was your poor trauma?

[Brian Frangie]

So I thought, by the way, Noah.

[Nikki Glaser]

Noah, what damaged you the most in your life that you've maybe never spoken about and are you ready to do it right now?

[Noah]

Several things. But I thought the most traumatic was at age 7 when I moved to this country and my parents didn't really explain what was happening. But now that I'm thinking about it, I think you're probably right that it was younger, because I didn't know this at all until recently, but my dad would leave for, like, long periods of time. And again, like, my parents didn't explain anything. They didn't talk about. They didn't think the kids had anxiety. Like, that was not even a thought in their minds. You just. You just go through life, right? And now that I'm thinking about you, you probably are, right. It's probably even before 7. And I remember I have nervous, anxious.

[Nikki Glaser]

Attachment about, like, I remember being left with my Aunt Lynn, who was a severe alcoholic. And even I knew, like, this is very irresponsible, and they don't know that I've got this and I'll be okay because I'm, like, a smart kid. But if I were a parent, I would not be leaving me with. And thank God my sister has me because she is too young to be in this environment, and I'll protect her from it. But I remember clocking, like, if I ever have kids, I'm gonna let them know. Like, I'll be back at this time. This is where I'm gonna just give them more information than I was given. And maybe I'm talking too much about this because I just got done with an interview about, like, my comedy process. And so I'm, like, a little bit in that mindset, but of, like, this woman is asking me about, like, why I'm motivated to talk about the things I am. And it's just, like, I just want people to have all the information because I was not given that as a child. And I think children deserve to be given all the details that they want and not be kept in the dark about things. And I think people. People just Think they're like dogs, like they don't, they don't have the capability to understand so much. So let's just give them less. Where I was like, where are we going? How long is it going to take there? Why is this car going so fast? What, why do we change lanes so much? Why are we like. I wanted all the information. I wasn't given it. So I think that's why now. I just, I, I try to like in my standup, give all the information about things that are kind of like shielded from me as a kid.

[Brian Frangie]

But it's a double edged sword as a parent because, you know, you could tell your child all this information. You could say, I'm going to be home at 4 specifically. And then if you're home at 4, 15, that's a betrayal.

[Nikki Glaser]

Well, no, you say around 4 now, give or take a little bit if you're home.

[Brian Frangie]

But what if you got stuck in traffic, you're home at 5:30, you're coming back.

[Noah]

Just.

[Nikki Glaser]

No, I don't like that. I, okay, I, I will be back. I don't like when people say, when I see on like movies and stuff where the parent goes, I will never leave you. I will always come back because what if you don't? That kid's fucked up and will never trust the rest of their life. Like nothing's guaranteed. I don't even know what you're supposed to say. But I just find that every time I hear that, I'm always like, she's going to die. Like I just. Like I don't.

[Brian Frangie]

In a movie. Yeah. I mean whenever that happens, I knock on wood. In real life, like if I'm, if I, if even someone says I'll see you later, I'll add, hopefully just to, you know, cover my bases. Yeah, then I'll knock on wood. And then I'll do three circles.

[Commercial Voice]

Tired of restless nights At Lisa, they know good sleep is essential for mental, physical and emotional health. From memory foam mattresses to hybrids that keep you cool all night long, Lisa's mattresses offer exceptional comfort and support with free delivery and a hundred nights. To try out your mattress in the comfort of your home, go to leesa.com today and get 20% off all mattresses and two free pillows. That's L, E E and use code iheart for an extra $50 off your purchase. Remember, no matter who you are, there's a Lisa just for you.

Hey everybody. So when you get asked, what is odoo? What comes to mind? Well, I'll tell you, Odoo is a bit of everything. Odoo is a suite of business management software that some people say is like fertilizer because the way it promotes growth. But, you know, some people also say that Odoo is like a magic beanstalk because it grows with your company and is magically affordable.

Ooh. But then again, you could look at Odoo in terms of how its individual software programs are a lot like building blocks. Whatever your business needs, manufacturing, accounting, HR programs, you can build a custom software suite that's perfect for your company. So what is Odoo? Well, Odoo is a bit of everything. Odoo is a fertilizer, magic beanstalk. Building blocks for business. Yeah, that's it.

Which means that Odoo is exactly what every business needs. Learn more and sign up now at odoo. Com. That's O D.

My best friend died suddenly, and now his wife and kids have to move out of their house. I had no idea he didn't have life insurance. If I could go back, I'd tell him how easy and affordable protecting your family can be. With select quote In 15 minutes, a licensed insurance agent found me a $500,000 life insurance policy for only $18 a month. They compare many of the nation's most highly rated insurance carriers to find the right coverage and price for your needs. In years, they've helped more than 2 million families secure over $700 billion in coverage. Even if you have a health concern, Selectquote agents can find you the right policy at the lowest price. Don't wait until it's too late. Get peace of mind that your loved ones are protected with life insurance. Go to selectquote.com to get your free quote today. That's selectquote.com selectquote.com details on example [e-mail].

[Nikki Glaser]

Hi, I'm Cindy Crawford and I'm the founder of Meaningful Beauty. Well, I don't know about you, but, like, I never liked being told, oh, wow, you look so good for your age. Like, why even bother saying that? Why don't you just say you look great at any age? Every age. That's what Meaningful Beauty is all about. We create products that make you feel confident in your skin at the age you are now.

[Noah]

Meaningful Beauty.

[Nikki Glaser]

Beautiful skin at every age. Learn [e-mail] Speaking of White Lotus first episode, did you catch when the Girl.

[Brian Frangie]

I didn't watch it yet. I didn't watch it yet.

[Nikki Glaser]

It's not a spoiler, really.

[Brian Frangie]

Well, no, really, it's less of A spoiler and more like I'm not going to be able to respond to you in an educated way.

[Nikki Glaser]

Have you watched it, Noah?

[Noah]

No.

[Nikki Glaser]

Here's what I'll say about it. So I'll just talk to two people that haven't seen it. I, I love the White Lotus. Thank you so much to Mike White for creating this up show that is murder mystery. Just with a cast of characters that has people coming in and out. You recognize characters. They don't always get all brought back. It's always in a different setting. It is a gift that we have gotten the White Lotus. It is a cultural gift because also you don't get them all dumped at the same time. They're parsed out week by week like old time tv. It reminds me I can place myself with, you know, White Lotus season one, White Lotus season two. It was like these benchmarks of the COVID where we were all like kind of. It's a, it was a timeline. It wasn't just one weekend where you binge them all. At least for me. I watched through like weeks. Like this is going to be spring, summer 2025 for me is White Lotus 3. And it's gonna be like a moment. And thank you, Mike White for talking, for putting in premises within these characters and the, the plot that are so up. And you're like, there's no way he's going here with this. Like, there is some stuff this season that is a brewing that I'm like, no one touches this pornhub touches this. No one else does. Like, it is, it's getting in. Like, if you know what I'm talking about. You know what I'm talking about. There's a scene with two brothers that I'm like, what the is going on here? This is so weird. And it is awesome because it is so weird. It's so fucked up that like, I would think most studio executives would be like, we're not allowing this, this storyline. Like, what. What is going on here? But it's happening and it's crazy. And it's something like I've never seen before in something. And I just love all the characters. I just, I just love this. It's like reading a book. I love White Lotus and I always forget how much I love it in the interim. And then the refractory period's over and I am ready to come again. Like, I am so pumped for White Lotus. It is giving me a joie de vivre. It is like it's, it's. Honestly, I'm looking so Forward to every Sunday now. Like, thank you so much for giving us fucking Destination Television again.

[Brian Frangie]

We've been missing this since the session ended.

[Noah]

That's what you guys were saying.

[Nikki Glaser]

And, like, destination in the sense that I want to go to fucking Thailand now. And am I obsessed with the song that is playing in the first episode of White Lotus that I heard a million times because our HBO was lagging, so we had to keep going. You know when you, like, buffer it and you keep going back and you have to watch the same scene over and over. There is this song by a group. I don't. It's. It really was. It was written in Thai, like, the language. Like, I can't even tell you what the name of the song is, but it is so good. And I posted on my story the other day. Let me just pull it up. It's on my Spotify right now. I'm not gonna play it, but it is.

[Brian Frangie]

Lotus is. It's amazing. And as you know, it's so incredibly well written.

[Nikki Glaser]

Oh, it is.

[Brian Frangie]

I mean, the writing is amazing. The characters are amazing. Mike White is one of the best writers ever alive. Yeah. And it really is great.

[Nikki Glaser]

I want to meet his.

[Brian Frangie]

Bad. Yeah. And, you know, he wrote School of Rock.

[Nikki Glaser]

I know. He also wrote Enlightened with Laura Dern, which was such a weird, cool show. He also is a vegan, and I just saw a quote from him the other day that was like, I don't know. One day I just realized my dog kind of looked like a pig, and I was just like, I can't eat pigs again. And I'm just like. Like, yes. Mike White makes it so simple. He just is. I just want to shake his hand someday. He just is. He's someone that I. It's fine. It's fun to realize there's someone you haven't met yet that you probably will get to cross paths with that you get to, like, kind of fan girl out over. And he's one of those people that I'm just realizing, like, has brought me so much away. Do you know that he is on Survivor?

[Brian Frangie]

No.

[Nikki Glaser]

He was, like, such a fan of the show Survivor that he got cast on it because sometimes they cast celebrity fans, I think a couple seasons ago. And I think he was really good at it. I. I really want to go back and watch his season because I'm just fascinated by him. He is. He's so cool. But there's. There is in the White Lotus, episode one. Everyone needs to watch this show. I. It's. It's not really an option. And I don't care if you're not watching it and you feel left out. You just need to get on board. You need to find someone with an HBO password to share it with you and. And watch together. But there is a girls trip that's going on, and it's very interesting because one of the girls is a famous actress, and the other two are like, it's kind of giving girls chat, but like a dysfunctional girls chat because the. There's three girls. I wish there were more because I think they could do more interesting things with dynamics, but they have too many characters on the show. I understand why there are not more, but one of them is a famous actress, One of them is married to a billionaire, and one of them is. We don't know what's going on with her, but they keep like, the two girls that are like, killing it, keep complimenting each other, and then they'll turn to the third girl and go, and you, your life is so hard.

[Brian Frangie]

Yeah, I saw that meme.

[Nikki Glaser]

It's so funny.

[Brian Frangie]

Everything you do is so hard.

[Nikki Glaser]

Everything you do is so hard. And your daughter, she's. Oh, she's just really growing up. Like, they just keep crossing her, these nothing things.

[Brian Frangie]

She gets older every day. Incredible understated jokes.

[Nikki Glaser]

Yeah, there's gonna be some really funny, fun things to play out. And Parker Posey, I love her so much. I. In fact, I just. To get. I saw her talking on a red carpet and I was just so intrigued by the way she talks and like, what an artist she is in terms of, like, I don't know. I don't. I don't always respect the art of acting. No offense to actors. I just don't care. Most of the time it just feels like, okay, good job. But people like Ralph Fiennes make me go, whoa, that's acting. And then people like, like Parker Posey blow my mind. And I know I'm a little bit like, I. I don't know, it's like with napping. Some people get it, some people don't. Acting doesn't blow me away most of the time, but Parker Posey is so nuanced and, and so incredible. And I went back and I downloaded or I rented Best in Show just so I could watch her. And she is spectacular. She is so good on Best in Show and she was so young and she just is playing this character who works at the Dairy Queen and just. She just plays the small town girl who's kind of like, like jaded, but like lost. So well, she is her. Sorry. Not best in show. Waiting for Guffman. Waiting for Guffman.

[Noah]

Oh, that's what used to be my.

[Nikki Glaser]

Favorite movie in high school. And I forgot why. And so I went back and rented it and I was. I was reminded. It's. It's a little bit like, you know, comedies age in a way that you're like, oh, this is a little bit slower than I'm used to now. Like, I need things.

[Brian Frangie]

Comedy was slow, pacier, you know, I was. Well, I think you appreciate acting more. Like, when you really can appreciate acting is when you're watching a good. An okay to good movie and people are acting in it well. And then there's one person who's not good at acting. And it's just like I was watching a movie this weekend, and I'm not gonna say which one, but. Cause this person was so bad in it. It was like unbelievable. And every time this person had a scene, me and my wife, we would just start laughing. It was so bad. It was like, wait, how is it possible they made it through all of these levels to get here to be doing a scene with this person who is one of the most famous, best actors of all time?

[Nikki Glaser]

Someone we know.

[Brian Frangie]

No, you. No one knows this person.

[Nikki Glaser]

That's nice of you to do that then. Because they. They have an upcoming career.

[Brian Frangie]

Maybe. I. I mean, it's just wild recently.

[Nikki Glaser]

Because the acting was. I mean, I was in. I didn't even want to see the movie. I read the book and then I was like, I don't know. Like, I heard about the movie and I go, I don't even really want to see this because it just. I heard that, like, some of the parts of the book didn't make it. And I was like, those are my favorite parts. So I was like, I don't even want to see it. Then there was a lot of news about this movie and I was like, okay, now I just want to, like, see what was the movie behind this thing. And I was very intrigued to watch it. And I literally had to turn it off in the first scene because the acting was making me feel so awkward. And I cannot believe the other story about this movie is taking over the story. What should be being talked about, which is the acting is unwatchable and I am not even that good of an actress. And I. I am so sorry. But I was like, what is going on here? Maybe I have to stick it out. Maybe I.

[Brian Frangie]

It's like an abusive relationship. You. Sometimes you just gotta stick it out and you sit with it longer than you should.

[Nikki Glaser]

But I also don't know that I am good at telling what good acting is. I. I really. I. I don't think I'm like someone who should be a critic. Even though I was voted most likely to be Siskel and Ebert in eighth grade. Don't you ever forget it. Final thought.

[Brian Frangie]

Well, the other. The other thing, just to close the loop on this. Sorry to interrupt. The final.

[Nikki Glaser]

Please close the loop.

[Brian Frangie]

Is that sometimes it happens in reverse, where you're watching a movie and everyone in it is bad at acting, except one person comes.

[Nikki Glaser]

Yeah.

[Brian Frangie]

And you're like. And then even though they're the good actor, they seem out of place because they're acting well. And in a world where everyone's acting poorly. And this happened when I. In the last Jurassic park movie, Jurassic World, I don't know, On Knife's Edge or whatever it was called that came out a few years ago. Yeah, the acting in it was horrible. Except for Laura Dern, who was so good that she seemed like she was a bad actor. When the dinosaurs would come and they'd be attacking people, all the actors were like, oh, no, a dinosaur. And then she'd be, like, screaming like someone was gonna eat her.

[Nikki Glaser]

Oh, my God.

[Brian Frangie]

And it made her seem like she was bad, even though she's acting right.

[Nikki Glaser]

To scream like a really traumatic thing is happening and nail it. I'll never, ever forget Gwyneth Paltrow in the movie Bounce finding out her husband died in a plane crash. And it's just a scene shot through a window. And her collapsing and wailing is so fucking real. And I just remember being like that. Is acting also Romeo and Juliet? When Juliet, Claire Danes realizes that Leo is dead. Sorry, spoiler alert. Something that has been out for centuries.

[Brian Frangie]

Yeah, sorry, I haven't read Romeo and Juliet. How long has that been out?

[Nikki Glaser]

So, yeah, since. I mean, I would guess. Let me. Okay, let me just show you how dumb I am. Let me show you how. Let's guess how dumb I am. I am guessing Shakespeare was okay. My life is riding on this. Okay? Let me just pretend there's a fucking gun to my head, and if I don't get it within 100 years, I'm gonna get shot. Okay. Okay, here we go.

[Brian Frangie]

Okay. 100 years.

[Nikki Glaser]

Oh, God. Oh, God. Okay, I am going to guess. 1659.

[Brian Frangie]

Not bad. You're. You're. You're almost 100 years off.

[Nikki Glaser]

No.

[Brian Frangie]

You'Re within. You didn't get shot in the head.

[Noah]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Brian Frangie]

You're Within. Yeah, I think Romeo and Juliet was.

[Nikki Glaser]

To me, that's a huge, huge. That's a success. I got it.

[Noah]

Right.

[Nikki Glaser]

Wait, what is 17?

[Brian Frangie]

1530. The late. Like, 1590s.

[Nikki Glaser]

I was gonna say 1490. Like, I was gonna say around Columbus sailed the ocean blue. And then I went. Okay, 1659. Okay, it was around 15 what?

[Brian Frangie]

In the 1590s. I think he wrote most of this.

[Nikki Glaser]

Did you know that? Off the top.

[Brian Frangie]

I knew. I knew. You know, I'm not. I'm guessing it's the right.

[Nikki Glaser]

Why do you know that? How did you know that? Like, do you remember when you learned that?

[Brian Frangie]

When did I learn it?

[Nikki Glaser]

I mean, I definitely learned it, but I don't. I usually remember when I, like, cement knowledge, and right now is when I'm cementing Shakespeare's 1590s.

[Brian Frangie]

Let me see. When was Romeo and Juliet written?

[Noah]

They said between 1591-1597.

[Nikki Glaser]

That's a really long time. I know.

[Noah]

Isn't that crazy?

[Brian Frangie]

They didn't know shit. They don't even know if he's the one who wrote this shit.

[Noah]

Okay.

[Nikki Glaser]

I was within 65 years. That's pretty good.

[Brian Frangie]

Yeah. Yeah. You got in it. You did it. You did it. You didn't get shot in the head.

[Nikki Glaser]

God. Because that could have been really embarrassing.

[Brian Frangie]

Nikki avoids getting shot in the head.

[Nikki Glaser]

Yeah, that's good. I avoided every day living in the neighborhood. We all do. What I was gonna say. Oh, can I just say, recommend a couple other things to watch?

[Brian Frangie]

Final thought.

[Nikki Glaser]

Yeah. The new Gabby Petito documentary about that murder is pretty good. They. They do it in three semi short episodes. I don't feel like they were all hour long. They might be, but Netflix is a way of kind of like. Like really stretching out the details. That one really held my attention. It's well done, very tragic, but has tons of footage because she took a lot of footage. And, yeah, she was an influencer. Yeah. And I also want her best friend on the show that is seen throughout it, who she met on Bumble when she moved to Florida because that idiot pulled her away from her family and moved her to Florida. And then she was looking for friends, so she went on Bumble and found a best friend. That girl should be on White Lotus. She is a fascinating character. I want her to be famous. She is so cool. And she seems like she was cast. She's so good. So that is very. I watched all three episodes last night. That was great. And then I'm obsessed with a new comedian. He's not a new comedian, but I'm obsessed. I'm. There's a comedian I'm obsessed with and I can't stop watching clips. And I think I've consumed every single thing he's put out in his, like, 10 year YouTube career within a couple of days. And that comedian is Chris Fleming. I've known about him for a while.

[Brian Frangie]

Yes.

[Noah]

But I am, he's awesome.

[Nikki Glaser]

Thank you. Literally, I, I, it was, it's as if. It's like, it's, it's, it make, it's, it's really hard for me to laugh out loud at things. And I am constantly cackling in bed listening to his stuff. I crave every new clip that comes up. One just came up yesterday about. He's like talking about. He has a sixth sense for when a restaurant is owned by brothers, because there's always a brother that, like, goes to. Austin is like, people love breakfast burritos. I can do that side of things. You do the menus. Like, it's always like these. But like, like, you have a passion for marketing. And it's like he, and then he just goes, what is going on with brothers? And he just talks about, like, the relationship of brothers, the tone that they have with each other is like this. You just have to watch it. Chris Fleming with one M for Chris Fleming. He is. I just, I was like, telling Chris, I'm like, I found my new favorite comedian. I wrote Chris and I'm like, you are literally my favorite comedian that has ever been. You're on like my Mount Rushmore. I'm obsessed. I can't. I'm gonna try to go see him at Largo coming up. I, it's just fun to, like, find someone new that you're obsessed with. Like, I, like, I love being obsessed about, about with artists, as everyone knows. And he's my, he's my new obsession. He is so funny. He writes in such a specific way. He is, he is a poet style, Great style. But I love that it's like, not the joke. You know what I mean? Like, right. He dresses like a, like, he dresses like disco, 70s, kind of almost feminine sometimes. He's like a really, like a rock.

[Noah]

Like a 70s rock star.

[Nikki Glaser]

Yeah, Like a Iggy. Iggy. Who's. What is David Bowie's like, alter ego? Yeah. Yeah. It's kind of like, like onesies. Like, you know, sequined onesies. He just has a, he has impeccable style, but it's not the joke. Like, he just is who he is and he's not making jokes about his Outfit. You know, like, you would initially see him and be like, oh, this guy is like, that's the joke. Right? But it isn't. That's just, like, who he is at his core. He's a. He's a just true artist. And I. And he even talked. He didn't talk, but he definitely made fun of me in one of his specials. And I. This was my first time ever even hearing about him. Someone was like, dropped. Yeah, he was like. Someone goes like, oh. Kirsten was like, you know that you are in mentioned in Chris Fleming's newest special. It's on Peacock right now. It's. I forget what it's called. But he. There's like, a sketch at the beginning where I actually. That is the one special I haven't seen of his. I'm, like, kind of leaving some things because I. I've just. I literally started watching him when I was on my travel day last week on Wednesday, and I was. It took so long to get across the country. I watched literally four hours of his stuff. And I keep, like, parsing it out.

[Noah]

Now, but his new special is called Hell.

[Nikki Glaser]

Hell. Okay, that's the special where at the beginning there's a sketch, and I kind of watched it out of context because people were just sending me the clip. But from what I remember, there's something that's going on where he can't perform, and the venue is like, well, we still have this venue rented. We got to put on some kind of show here. And then his, like, agent is on the phone, and he goes. She goes, okay, maybe we can do Nikki Glazer special. I think she's ready to tape Two in the Pink. But I, I. I deserve it because I have talked a lot about sex, and it's like, you could, like, whittle down my special to just, like, Two in the Pink, for sure. And I actually appreciated it. But he, like, then I saw more than about the.

[Brian Frangie]

Just the vagina. I mean, you also talk about ass stuff.

[Nikki Glaser]

Yeah. Yes, exactly.

[Brian Frangie]

Yeah.

[Nikki Glaser]

I'm so much more than that. And the taint, everything in between.

[Brian Frangie]

Yeah.

[Nikki Glaser]

And I'm going, yeah, I'm going up. And I'm doing, like, clit now.

[Brian Frangie]

And you moved up the clit. You've expanded your range. It's really what it is.

[Nikki Glaser]

So, yeah, FUPA is my next special, so that'll be exciting.

[Brian Frangie]

We never thought you'd get to fupa, but it's amazing to see how much you've grown.

[Nikki Glaser]

It's like my fubu.

[Commercial Voice]

Yeah.

[Nikki Glaser]

It's for me, by me.

[Brian Frangie]

Anyway, all right, that.

[Nikki Glaser]

No, that came in. Not dead. No, I was packing one today. Sometimes, like, when you're about to be on your period, that's. That area just, like, inflates to get ready to carry a baby that you are not going to carry, and then your body punishes you with cramps for not giving Jesus another son or whatever. So anyway, Chris, I. He. I didn't even care. Like, make fun of me all you want, because he makes fun of everyone, and I kind of like it. He's kind of, like, trolling everyone because he's just telling the truth. He's making observations. He's not. I appreciate someone who's not scared to call out when something's lame or when someone's doing something that's kind of, you know, mockable. And he's not ever trying to climb by, like, not mentioning certain people's names. Like, everyone is fair to get called out. And if I want in my artist, I want someone who is fearless in that way. And if that puts me in the line of fire, so be it. Like, I still love him. And. And, you know, I. And then it also made me go, hey, I don't want to be that person that. That a joke can be made like that. About, like, I need to be better. And maybe, you know, and this was already something that I wanted to do prior to hearing that joke. But, like, I hope that that joke doesn't work in years to come. And I don't think it would work now for me. My act is not really about sex anymore. But he is just incredible. And I. I just think everyone should follow him. And I don't know why he isn't, like, the biggest comedian working today. Like a. A presence on stage that is reminiscent of, like, I don't know, just like an arena comic. Like, it's. He's. He's incredible and such a great writer. You've known about him for a while, Brian.

[Brian Frangie]

This is a tale. I mean, I don't know him personally, but this is a tale as old as time. There's a reason why he's not the most famous comic is because the. The public is too dumb to. I would agree for a comic like him to be the most famous is impossible.

[Nikki Glaser]

But no, I would not listen. I don't know that he has aspirations to be the most famous and that be. I don't think he'd be offended if we were to say that he's just out of reach for some people. But I don't know him. But I will say that I think. I don't know. I've. He definitely is more intellectual than me. I have to look up words all the time that he uses. I learned the word spoonerism the other day, which was so funny because he was just saying that. Who did he say? He. He. Like, he was saying something about. Wait, wait, don't tell me that show on NPR are how, like, these people are killing with these boomers, and these boomers are losing their minds. Have you ever heard that show? The. The roof is blown off the place because they're laughing so hard at spoonerisms. And I didn't know what it was, so I looked it up. In a. Spoonerism is, like, geeky. And the laser. It's just changing the first part of, like, switching the consonants. Yeah. Kind of.

[Brian Frangie]

It's like just.

[Nikki Glaser]

Yeah. Like. Yeah. What's the one where you get pulled over and you're like, I wasn't. You called the officer or something else. What is it? Do you know what I'm saying?

[Brian Frangie]

No.

[Nikki Glaser]

What's the problem? Off. I forget there's this. Like, it just proves the person's drunk because they say something instead of, what's the officer problem? Yes. Thank you. I think that could be. Maybe that's not spoonerism, but, like, it just. I've. I looked up a ton of words that he taught me, and I didn't retain most of them.

[Brian Frangie]

I've never heard of spoons.

[Nikki Glaser]

I like someone who's, like, challenging me to go, and I have to constantly rewind to be like, I missed that because it was so quick. Like, it feels like a 30 rock. Feels like veep. Like, it feels like I'm being challenged to be smarter. It's like, it's really.

[Brian Frangie]

I had to retrain myself to not do a spoonerism, in fact, because for my whole life, I had trouble saying coin toss. I would say toy costs all the time. That's, like, what my brain. And so it took me, like, a couple of years of saying that very slowly in order to say coin toss correctly.

[Nikki Glaser]

It's like me with Take for Granted. I always want to say granite, because I know one of them's wrong, and I want to say the right one, and I always choose the wrong one. Yeah. Sometimes smart people do dumb things, but.

[Brian Frangie]

I have a list.

[Nikki Glaser]

Check out those things.

[Brian Frangie]

I have a list of spoonerisms, and I will read you the spoonerism, and you tell me what the actual thing is.

[Nikki Glaser]

Okay.

[Brian Frangie]

Ready?

[Nikki Glaser]

Yeah.

[Brian Frangie]

All right. Okay. Here I am. Belly jeans.

[Nikki Glaser]

Belly jeans.

[Brian Frangie]

Belly jean.

[Nikki Glaser]

You were saying I am belly jeans.

[Brian Frangie]

No, no, forget about I am. That was me just saying jelly beans. Jelly beans, that's correct.

[Nikki Glaser]

Well, yeah, these aren't going to be hard, Brian, because I'm just going to switch the first word letter.

[Brian Frangie]

Sometimes they're hard.

[Nikki Glaser]

Okay, okay, try to stop me.

[Brian Frangie]

A well boiled icicle.

[Nikki Glaser]

Okay, I don't know what this is.

[Brian Frangie]

You can tell me the answer. A well boiled icicle.

[Nikki Glaser]

Oh, A well oiled bicycle.

[Brian Frangie]

Oh, okay. Wow. You see, it's like. It's almost like Wheel of Fortune. Yeah, see, I told you it'd be fun.

[Nikki Glaser]

Okay, you're right.

[Brian Frangie]

I could come up with fun things on occasion, but no, they're all right. He told us a lack of pies.

[Noah]

Pack of lies.

[Nikki Glaser]

Yes, that's good.

[Brian Frangie]

Very good.

[Nikki Glaser]

But these are harder. Oh, what confidence I spoke with that this was going to be a lame game. This is fun.

[Brian Frangie]

Is the bean dizzy? This one's impossible. This.

[Nikki Glaser]

Is the dean busy?

[Brian Frangie]

Yeah. Is the dean busy? Because that's not even. That's not even a real thing. I mean, who's saying that? Is that.

[Nikki Glaser]

We got to go. A person that needs to go and talk to the dean about, you know, some hijinks that are going on on campus because we got to get this frat thrown out. That's the only time I ever see the dean is when like a frat on campus is in trouble. Right?

[Brian Frangie]

Yeah. No, yeah. Or in. In a Bud Light Shane Gillis commercial.

[Nikki Glaser]

Exactly. Yeah, exactly. I do like that commercial where they count down. They're like, oh, we can't drink on camera.

[Brian Frangie]

Yeah, no. All the Bud Light Shane Gillis commercial has been great.

[Nikki Glaser]

Yeah. You know what other one I really love is the one with God, George Kittle. Have you seen that?

[Brian Frangie]

Yes.

[Nikki Glaser]

And then at the very end, he goes. The guy goes, thanks, George Kittle. And he goes, no, call me George Kittle. Yeah, that's. That's good. All right, we're going to go. We're gerwana. Go. Whoa. Whoa. Thank you guys for listening to the podcast. If we learned a lot today, we will be back next week. I'll be in Boston all week. The only show that is not sold out, out of my six Boston shows is Sunday night, 9:30. So get on that. If you're in the Boston area, that one is going to be a triumphant one because it will be the end of the run. I will have the newfound energy. I will be as practiced as I possibly could be. I think that's gonna be the best show of the week. And there's still tickets available if you want to come see me at the wangtheater Nikki glaser.com so many tour dates being added. So many. You know, you know where to find. Thank youlaser.com thank you for listening. We will see you next week on the show. Don't be cook. Bye. The Nikki Glaser Podcast is a production by Will Ferrell's Big Money Players and I Heart Podcasts created and hosted by me, Nikki Glaser, co hosted by Brian Frangie, executive produced by Will Ferrell, Hans Soni and Noah edited and engineered by Lean and Loaf, video production Mark Canton and music by Anya Marina. You can now watch full episodes of the Nikki glaser podcast on YouTube, follow icky glazerpod and subscribe to our channel hey Janice Torres here and I'm Austin Hankowitz. We're the hosts of Mind the Business.

[Brian Frangie]

Small Business Success Stories produced by Ruby Studio and Intuit QuickBooks.

[Nikki Glaser]

Catch up on seasons one and two.

[Brian Frangie]

And join us for a brand new.

[Nikki Glaser]

Season of the podcast as we talk to small business owners about how they manage and grow their business with the help of platforms like Intuit QuickBooks.

[Brian Frangie]

Listen to mind the Business Small Business Success Stories on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts.

[Noah]

At. David's Bridal Love is in every stitch. From the initial sketch to the final details. Each style is designed with exquisite craftsmanship. Every wedding gown, bridesmaid look, prom dress and special occasion style in between features handcrafted details, details filled with love. Come see the magic in person. Book an appointment and sign up for Diamond Loyalty to save 15% on your first purchase, earn points towards special rewards and more at DavidSbridal.com.

[Commercial Voice]

Tired of restless nights? At Lisa, they know good sleep is essential for mental, physical and emotional health. From memory foam mattresses to hybrids that keep you cool all night long, Lisa's mattresses offer excess exceptional comfort and support with free delivery and a hundred nights to try out your mattress in the comfort of your home. Go to Lisa.com today and get 20% off all mattresses and two free pillows. That's L-E-E-S-A.com and use code IHEART for an extra 50 off your purchase. Remember, no matter who you are, there's a Lisa just for you.

[Brian Frangie]

Are you still quoting 30 year old movies? Have you said cool beans in the past 90 days? Do you think Discover isn't widely accepted? If this sounds like you, you're stuck in the past. Discover is accepted at 99% of places that take credit cards nationwide. And every time you make a purchase with your card, you automatically earn cash back. Welcome to the Now It Pays to Discover. Learn [e-mail] credit card based on the February 2024 Nielsen report.