#516 Nikki 'The Famous Aunt', Writers' Room Moments & 'Get Out of My Elevator!'

Summary

The Nikki Glaser Podcast Episode #516 Summary

Release Date: March 7, 2025
Title: Nikki 'The Famous Aunt', Writers' Room Moments & 'Get Out of My Elevator!'
Host/Author: Big Money Players Network and iHeartPodcasts

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1. Introduction

In Episode #516 of The Nikki Glaser Podcast, Nikki Glaser, alongside co-hosts Matt and Leah, delves into a myriad of topics ranging from personal finances in relationships to the dynamics of writer's rooms. The episode intertwines humor with brutally honest discussions, staying true to Nikki’s reputation for providing insightful commentary on pop culture and personal life.

2. Combining Finances in Relationships

Nikki and her co-hosts explore the complexities of managing finances within a romantic relationship. They discuss the balance between shared and separate accounts, emphasizing transparency and commitment.

• Nikki Glaser (04:22): "No, that's nice, because then you can be like, I'm buying this for myself, and you don't get to weigh in on what I spend my money on because I'm using my own thing on this."

• Leah (04:30): "Yeah."

• Matt (05:02): "I have separate bank accounts with my wife. And the way we do it..."

The conversation highlights the importance of setting clear financial responsibilities to prevent conflicts, allowing each partner autonomy over certain expenses while contributing equally to shared obligations.

3. Safe Deposit Boxes and Valuables

Nikki shares her experience attempting to secure a joint safe deposit box with her spouse, leading to a humorous yet insightful dialogue about ownership and security of valuables.

• Nikki Glaser (05:34): "We just pay for certain bills individually... I tried to get a safe deposit box at the bank the other day..."

• Leah (06:31): "A safe deposit box is the weirdest thing I've ever heard."

This segment underscores the challenges couples face when integrating personal possessions and the differing perceptions of what constitutes valuable assets.

4. Vince McMahon Documentary Discussion

The hosts critique the recent Vince McMahon documentary, dissecting his rise to power within the WWF, his contentious relationships, and the portrayal of his abrasive personality.

• Leah (11:08): "He really knew what he was doing. He redefined... and then he's gonna poop on women or something."

• Matt (16:34): "He had a line about his abusive stepdad... that, like, if anything could have enjoyed killing him."

Nikki and her co-hosts question whether Vince's aggressive behavior was always inherent or a product of his quest for power, suggesting that his toxic traits were present from early on.

5. Nature vs. Nurture and Empathy

The discussion shifts to the impact of upbringing on personal development. The hosts lament the lack of empathy and compassion in individuals raised without supportive environments.

• Leah (19:00): "People are so lucky if, like, we even anyone care about us at all ever once..."

• Nikki Glaser (19:01): "Nature and nurture is definitely. Nurture is important."

They highlight how adverse childhood experiences can shape one's ability to empathize and function within society, advocating for greater understanding and support systems.

6. Setting Boundaries and Communication

Nikki emphasizes the importance of being direct and setting boundaries in both personal and professional relationships. The conversation delves into the societal challenges, especially women face when asserting themselves.

• Leah (31:25): "It's being direct. And I think that a lot of times being direct is misconstrued for being mean."

• Nikki Glaser (42:21): "And that's how it evens out. Then you're just a good judge of things as opposed to just being a negative piece of judgment."

This segment encourages assertive communication as a means to foster healthy relationships and prevent misunderstandings.

7. Insecurity and Self-Esteem

The hosts explore the role of insecurity in personal growth, discussing how it can drive individuals to strive for greatness while also highlighting the potential downsides of persistent self-doubt.

• Nikki Glaser (61:24): "Insecurity is one way in order for you to become great is if you constantly..."

• Matt (61:03): "I honestly, feeling secure is just so foreign to me. I love being insecure. I embrace it."

They acknowledge that while insecurity can be a motivating force, excessive self-criticism may be detrimental to mental well-being.

8. Writer's Room Dynamics and Honesty

Nikki shares anecdotes from her experiences in writers' rooms, stressing the significance of honesty and constructive criticism in creative environments.

• Leah (36:07): "Sometimes you will literally say that... you're not trying to even be insulting..."

• Nikki Glaser (42:40): "I think you do this too. So, like, the key to being blunt successfully..."

The discussion underscores the necessity of candid feedback for enhancing the quality of work, while also maintaining a supportive atmosphere.

9. Personal Stories about Family and Being a "Famous Aunt"

Nikki reflects on her role as a famous aunt, sharing stories about her interactions with family members and the responsibilities that come with fame.

• Leah (56:04): "I do think it's a nice thing to do... I didn't think of the fallout from that."

• Matt (56:22): "Sometimes they trick you, man. Sometimes they trick you."

These narratives highlight the balance between leveraging fame for family support and managing personal boundaries to maintain genuine relationships.

10. Conclusion

The episode wraps up with the hosts celebrating positive interactions and reaffirming the importance of kindness and authenticity in both personal and public spheres.

• Leah (67:16): "She is... It's constant, and it's art."

• Nikki Glaser (66:38): "I would so much rather just, like, ignore everything..."

They advocate for maintaining genuine connections and the impact of small positive gestures in everyday interactions.

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Notable Quotes with Timestamps

• Nikki Glaser (04:22): "No, that's nice, because then you can be like, I'm buying this for myself, and you don't get to weigh in on what I spend my money on because I'm using my own thing on this."

• Leah (11:08): "He really knew what he was doing. He redefined... and then he's gonna poop on women or something."

• Matt (16:34): "He had a line about his abusive stepdad... that, like, if anything could have enjoyed killing him."

• Nikki Glaser (19:01): "Nature and nurture is definitely. Nurture is important."

• Nikki Glaser (42:21): "And that's how it evens out. Then you're just a good judge of things as opposed to just being a negative piece of judgment."

• Matt (61:03): "I honestly, feeling secure is just so foreign to me. I love being insecure. I embrace it."

• Nikki Glaser (66:38): "I would so much rather just, like, ignore everything..."

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Key Insights and Conclusions

1. Financial Transparency in Relationships: Establishing clear financial roles and maintaining a balance between shared and separate accounts can foster trust and reduce conflicts.

2. Setting and Respecting Boundaries: Being direct in communication is essential for healthy relationships, though it may be misconstrued, particularly for women who face societal pressures.

3. Impact of Upbringing: Early life experiences significantly shape an individual's ability to empathize and interact socially, emphasizing the need for nurturing environments.

4. Embracing Insecurity: While insecurity can drive personal growth, it is crucial to find a balance to prevent it from undermining self-esteem and mental health.

5. Honest Feedback in Creative Processes: Constructive criticism and honesty within writers' rooms are vital for enhancing the quality of creative work, fostering an environment of mutual respect and improvement.

6. Navigating Fame and Personal Relationships: Managing fame within family dynamics requires balance to ensure authentic relationships while leveraging public status for familial support.

7. Importance of Kindness and Authenticity: Genuine interactions and small acts of kindness can significantly impact personal and professional relationships, promoting a more empathetic society.

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Final Thoughts

Episode #516 of The Nikki Glaser Podcast offers a rich tapestry of discussions that blend personal anecdotes with broader societal observations. Nikki and her co-hosts provide listeners with both humor and depth, encouraging introspection and healthier interpersonal dynamics. The inclusion of notable quotes with timestamps allows for easy reference, making the episode a valuable resource for those seeking both entertainment and meaningful insights.

Transcript

[Matt]

Hi, I'm Matt.

[Leah]

And I'm Leah and we're from the Grown Up Stuff Podcast.

[Matt]

And just in time for tax season. On this week's episode, we're chatting with CPA Lisa Green Lewis about how small businesses can tackle their taxes using TurboTax Business.

[Leah]

A Forbes study mentioned that a whopping 93% of small businesses overpay their taxes.

[Matt]

And 17% of Gen Zers believed that.

[Leah]

You could write off any expense as a business expense.

[Matt]

So can't blame them. It's really important to do your taxes. Listen to Grown up stuff on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your favorite podcasts. Grown Up Stuff.

[Leah]

On a more serious note, I'm still thinking about that commercial with Tom Brady and Snoop Dogg hating on each other because when you listen to the reasons for hating someone or something, you realize just how stupid they really are. There is too much hate in this country and it's gotta stop. So join us at iHeart in standing up to it. If you see hate, speak up, call it out and you can learn More by following OT'sUPwithHate Unlike what you're listening.

[Nikki Glaser]

To, T Mobile's coverage is no joke.

[Leah]

Because T Mobile helps keep you connected from big cities to your hometown on.

[Nikki Glaser]

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[Leah]

Switch now keep your phone and T Mobile will pay it off at the $800 per line via prepaid card.

[Matt]

Visit your local T Mobile location or.

[Nikki Glaser]

Learn more@t mobile.com KeepAndSwitch up to four lines via virtual prepaid card allowed 15.

[Leah]

Days qualifying unlocked device credit service report in 90 plus days device ineligible carrier and timely redemption required.

[Nikki Glaser]

Card has no cash access and expires in six months.

[Leah]

Where'd you get those shoes?

[Nikki Glaser]

Easy.

[Leah]

They're from dsw. Because DSW has the exact right shoes for whatever you're into right now. You know, like the sneakers that make office hours feel like happy hour, the boots that turn grocery aisles into runways, and all the styles that show off the movie many sides of you, from daydreamer to multitasker and everything in between. Because you do it all in really great shoes. Find a shoe for every you at your DSW store or dsw.com the Nikki.

[Nikki Glaser]

Glazer podcast.

[Leah]

Here'S Mickey. Hello, here I am. Welcome to the show. It's Nikki Glaser Podcast Starting off having to respond to a text urgently. Let's set the stage. Noah's here, Sean's here, Brian's here. I just have to tell Chris that he's talking to my money guy, and he just said, can you please let him know that you. He can tell me the state of your finances? You have full permission to tell Chris anything about my money. Okay. Tell them it's whatever. Whatever. Finances and couples. That's, like a. A topic that's hard to talk about, like death and sex. Yeah, it is. It. I guess. Yeah, I guess. I just don't. I don't. Yeah. Yeah, I guess it is. But I'm just like, I. I don't care what people. I just don't really have any secrets, so I don't. It's also big. Like, it just shows commitment. Like, I remember when Avi and I, like, combined our finances, you know, our bank accounts or whatever. We still have our separate ones, but how do you do that together? Like, how do you determine what's separate and what's conjoined? Well, we just went to the bank and opened a joint one, and then every month, we put the same amount of money into it to cover our expenses. So, like, what do you. If you're getting your hair done, where. Where do you pull that from? Oh, that's my money. That's. No. Well, then what if you're buying a new hair dryer for your home that you're gonna mostly use? Avi has no hair, so that's a Noah expense. But what other hairs. Isn't that also. Okay. What if you're buying a snack that only you eat? Like, UTS's, like, hot groceries. Yeah. Combined. Even if. Okay. Even if it's a snack that you want.

[Nikki Glaser]

Yeah. Spots.

[Leah]

Yeah, Spots. I love those. Okay, that's interesting. Yeah, it's. How do you, like. How do you not, like if you. I. Yeah, it's. I don't know how anyone does it. It is fucked up. It's.

[Nikki Glaser]

What are you doing? No, just. Just either put it all together or keep it separate.

[Leah]

No, that's nice, because then you can be like, I'm buying this for myself, and you don't get to weigh in on what I spend my money on because I'm using my own thing on this.

[Nikki Glaser]

Yeah.

[Matt]

Yes. It's very. It's very Destiny's child of you.

[Leah]

Like, when I make them down to dance that song.

[Matt]

Yeah. I think in my head, I'm a bugaboo. Bills, bills, bills about.

[Leah]

Oh, bills, bills. Yes, yes. Bills that.

[Nikki Glaser]

Wait, that's.

[Matt]

Oh, I'm terrified of being a bugaboo. That is like, my least.

[Leah]

What about a scrub?

[Matt]

Yeah, I don't want no scrubs, unfortunately. I know. I'm a scrub.

[Nikki Glaser]

Yeah.

[Leah]

I could see you're hanging out the passenger side of your best friend. Best friend's ride.

[Nikki Glaser]

Trying to holler. I don't. I have separate bank accounts with my wife. And the way.

[Leah]

Yeah. How do you do? Like, combining.

[Nikki Glaser]

We just pay for certain bills individually. Like, I have Ali's cell phone on my cell phone contract or whatever, and she pays for health insurance because I'm on her health insurance. So it's like we just have, like, different responsibilities that we're. That we take care of.

[Leah]

Okay.

[Nikki Glaser]

But we don't have a joint. I tried to get a safe deposit box at the bank the other day so we can put our important valuables in there. And I go in there and I go, can I get a safe deposit box?

[Leah]

And they said, isn't a safety deposit box.

[Nikki Glaser]

Oh, is it guys.

[Leah]

A safe deposit box?

[Nikki Glaser]

I've never thought it was a safe deposit box.

[Leah]

I thought it was a safe because.

[Nikki Glaser]

It'S in a safe.

[Matt]

It's at a safe. It's like a deposit box. Yeah.

[Leah]

What the. Okay, go on deposit.

[Nikki Glaser]

Well, the story.

[Matt]

Did they tell you that it's no longer the 1930s? Why?

[Leah]

They said.

[Nikki Glaser]

They said. But the way he said it was. He's like, we don't have those, and we won't have them for a long time.

[Leah]

Well, didn't they burn? Didn't people lose stuff in the fire? Yeah. I would be worried if, like, not only do you have to grab your valuables from your house in a fire, you have to then go down to the post office.

[Nikki Glaser]

I guess it is wise to put your safe deposit box in a bank that's kind of far away from your house in case the whole thing.

[Leah]

Deposit box is the weirdest thing I've ever heard. I feel like I'm being. I feel like this is Mandela effect. Like, I've never heard anyone call it a safe deposit. It's always been safety. I think it's both. Oh, thank God. Because both are showing up on Google. It's a regional thing Again.

[Matt]

It's a regional thing. Yeah.

[Nikki Glaser]

This whole time, I thought it was Destiny's Children.

[Leah]

It should be. Wait, what? They should. There's three of them.

[Nikki Glaser]

Yeah. No, it doesn't make any sense.

[Leah]

That or four. There were four.

[Matt]

There were four. One really got left out. The other two only mildly got left out.

[Leah]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Nikki Glaser]

Feels like in every great band, there's always one person who got left out. Or early on. That happened to the Beatles. Yeah. Pete Best happened to me and Hubastank. I Was the fourth. I was the stank.

[Leah]

Wait, so what made you, like, what valuables do you have to go, like, put in this thing? I don't even understand what you would put in.

[Nikki Glaser]

Recently, my brother deposit box came to me and he said, I have your birth certificate. Your actual birth certificate. And I don't know why he had it, but he had it and he mailed it to me. And I was like, I'm not gonna. Like, that is so valuable because it's your original.

[Leah]

Is it? Because you didn't even know you. It was. It existed until he called you. So without it, I had to use.

[Matt]

It for the mail.

[Nikki Glaser]

I forgot what I had to use it for. But there was a thing like, I think it was like setting up a payment thing where they were like, I had. My passport was expired, so I couldn't use my passport. The only other thing is your birth certificate.

[Leah]

Okay. Okay.

[Nikki Glaser]

Psychopath still has their birth certificate.

[Leah]

Yeah, I don't know where mine is. I don't. Social Security card. That limp little piece of paper.

[Nikki Glaser]

Yeah.

[Leah]

Like, literally every driver who gives me their card has a more sturdy car like card than the Social Security card.

[Nikki Glaser]

Yeah.

[Leah]

Which is made with Egyptian papers and.

[Nikki Glaser]

You'Re not allowed perforated edges that you pull off.

[Leah]

Terrible.

[Matt]

I. I laminated my Social Security card in like when I was like 17 and I got yelled at trying to get a passport, saying that this is illegal to laminate.

[Leah]

I'm like, it's illegal to protect it. We want to. We want you to lose this and damage it by the time you have to do anything.

[Nikki Glaser]

Yeah.

[Leah]

Yeah.

[Matt]

Here I am just trying to sell it to like a Malaysian teenager.

[Leah]

God, laminating was so fun. I can't believe 17 year old Sean laminated something.

[Matt]

My mom had a laminator and I was.

[Leah]

Okay, yeah, you were looking for anything.

[Nikki Glaser]

What were you doing at 17, Sean? What were you like?

[Matt]

Oh, I was drinking, smoking and laminate. Laminate.

[Nikki Glaser]

Did you, when you were in high school, did you hang out with like, nerds? Did you play sports at all? What was going on?

[Matt]

I. I played sports and I was in a. An emo band, which I've talked about on this before. Yeah. I.

[Leah]

What did you play again?

[Matt]

I played baseball.

[Leah]

Okay.

[Matt]

And like, truly, truly just a pathetic person. But someone, someone pointed that I was semi popular in high school and it just, it redefined everything. I like it. It changed how I viewed myself in high school.

[Leah]

I actually, Sean ran into a woman this weekend at the Vanity Fair party who came up to me and said that she saw Us both in Cabo, her and her husband. And she was the one that went up to you afterwards and was like, I went to the same high school as you. And she disclosed to me that she was like. And it was really awkward because we both suffered so much trauma at that school being beat. Is that true?

[Matt]

Oh, no, no. Well, this was the woman who came up, and she was like, I went to that high school. And then I was like, oh, what year did you graduate? And she was like, 1989. And I was like, what?

[Leah]

And she looks so young. Yes, yes. I, like, froze when she said that, because I was like. I remember Sean telling me something about how either she looked too old or too young. And I just didn't want to say anything, so I was like, oh, that's crazy. Even though I knew some. But she said that, like, she was like, oh, my God. And I just was like, I don't. She didn't say she was reliving trauma. Hearing you talk. She. You, like, had a story about the school or something, and in your stand up. And she said that it, like, she was like, oh, my God, we were both so traumatized by that school.

[Matt]

Oh, interesting. I was not beat at all. Like, if anything.

[Leah]

Do you think it went on, though?

[Matt]

Oh, absolutely. Because, like, my mom went to that school, and she would always talk about how they would, like, hit the students.

[Leah]

Oh, great. And so she sent you there.

[Matt]

Yeah, she sent me there because.

[Leah]

Thanks.

[Matt]

Yeah. And they didn't even hit me, and I was ready for it.

[Leah]

No, you don't seem like someone who would get hit. Speaking of getting hit, have you guys seen the Vince McMahon documentary?

[Nikki Glaser]

No.

[Leah]

Okay. I watched the first part of it last night with my parents. I went over there and, like, the first episode is all just about, like, him kind of taking over the WWF from his dad and then, like, expanding and stealing all these territories and making it, like, this cultural phenomenon. And then they did this. What? They talk about this one part in, like, the late 80s, I'm guessing maybe mid-80s, where, you know, pro wrestling was, like, all the rage, and people were starting to have this kind of discourse of, like, it's fake, is it real? Is it fake? Which, like, I grew up hearing all the time. That's all you talked about, was that you thought any guy who liked pro wrestling was so dumb because it's obviously fake. And it's like, yeah, duh. It's like. It's like a play. What's wrong with that? Like, why couldn't we accept that about it? Like, I Don't even understand. But, like, why did you guys do such a poor job of describing what it was? You were just, like, nuts. Real. Real. Like, I just. You should have just been like, yeah, it is, but so is TV that you watch. Like, why did you all not have really, a good defense for it? Well, when you're like, it is real. When you didn't believe it was real. Right.

[Nikki Glaser]

You're six and you're seven. When you're first into it, you think it's real. And then you slowly. When you get into, like, age. I. I don't know if it's quite like Santa, but a little bit, because.

[Matt]

You are living the lie. And, like. But you don't realize it until, like, somebody older than you points it out. But, like, also, like, when I was 13, I thought it was real because me and my friends would do, like, backyard wrestling. And, like, we were really hurting each other.

[Leah]

Right.

[Nikki Glaser]

That's the thing about it. Yeah. Is that it actually does get hurt. And especially when, like, the ECW came out, which was another wrestling league that's still around. Like, they were particularly into, like, actually hurting each other and making sure that, like, the moves were vicious and. And people.

[Leah]

And they throw each other into thumbtacks and.

[Nikki Glaser]

Yeah.

[Leah]

To cut them. Yeah. They're still getting injured, but it's still, you know, like, there are people that are, you know, that do a role, like, you know, what's his name? Jeremy Strong gets injured emotionally from portraying someone. Like, it's still fake, though. Like, I'm not saying it's. It is. It is a play. It is fictional. And, like, yes, things can happen where it's like, you know, what's his name? The Andre the Giant? Like, his body kind of failed him during one match, and so Hulk Hogan ended up winning it, even though it was kind of predetermined that the other guy would win because he couldn't get it back up. And Hulk was trying to tell him, like, keep falling into the rope so it can spring you back up. Because once he fell on his back, he, like, couldn't get up. His body was, like, starting to crumble. So there's, like. I'm sure there's things on the fly that happened that are like, whoa, that's not predetermined, but it's okay that it's fake. And. But there was this. So Anyway, in the mid-80s, there was this huge backlash of it's fake, and they were kind of covering up, being like, it's not. Which is not. I just don't Think that was a good defense. So then, did you guys remember John Stossel did a report for ABC News or something like that?

[Matt]

Yeah.

[Leah]

And he went under the guise of, like, saying, like, I want to just, you know, see. Interview Hulk Hogan and, like, kind of COVID this phenomenon that is this, you know, Hulk Mania. And. But instead it started getting around that he was asking about, like, the fakeness of it, and he was saying, like, I hear you guys cut your. Like, cut yourselves with razor blades. I just assume they use fake blood, but I guess they literally cut themselves with razor blades.

[Matt]

Yeah, there. There's a way. There's a place to cut over your eyebrow. Like, I've that, like, if you do, like, a little cut, it doesn't leave a mark, scar, and it will gush.

[Nikki Glaser]

Yeah, it's like when Trump got shot in the ear.

[Leah]

Ye. Yeah. Got it, got it. Like, okay. But. Okay, so then John. John Sasso's backstage interviewing someone, and the guy fucking punches him two times. Like, he gives him 10 of this in the ear, like, permanent ear damage. He sued the wwf, got a settlement out. You know, we don't know how much he got. And then Richard Belzer also got attacked by Hulk Hogan, who put him in a headlock on the show. And then when he, like, let him out of the headlock because he was kind of giving him a hard time, him and Mr. T, and they were like, oh, well, we'll show you. We put him in headlock, and he fell out of the headlock and slammed his head on the. Like, the ground of his studio. He had, like, a talk show real bleeding from the back of his head. And he's like, yeah, that's real. Real. And. But it was so lame that they were like, we're gonna, like, fuck up these, like, little nerdy reporters. It was so lame. It was so gross and that. But I'm not even happy. I haven't gotten to. I'm like, get to the poop. I know Vince McMahon, like, made, like, pooped on women or something. I'm like, let's get to that.

[Matt]

Yeah. The. The first episode is basically very, very pro. Vince McMahon, like, yeah.

[Leah]

You're, like, kind of like, this guy rules. He really knew what he was doing. He redefined. He, like. He kind of went out and conquered the United States in terms of wrestling. He was like, he. His dad never really loved him. Didn't really believe in him. Kind of sold him the company under the guise of, like, he'll never actually own this company. He set him up to fail. He Actually succeeded. He's like, kind of a. You're, like, rooting for him, and then he's gonna poop on women or something. I can't. I mean, me. This. I'm sicko. Like, when are we gonna poop on women? But even though I don't want that to happen. Like, do you guys get like that on these documentaries? Like, get to the sick shit.

[Matt]

It's. It's coming. They had to. They had to set up. Like, he's not rich yet. Like, rich. Like, once he gets rich, that's when the depravity shows up. Yeah.

[Leah]

Is it always there? Like, I'm looking for it in his eyes as, like, a young boy where he's trying to, like, earn his dad's respect. Like, I'm trying to see, like, the psychop tendencies, and I don't really see it. And then they cut to, like, an interview with him now, and you're like, oh, it's there. Like, what does. Does being coming a billionaire like, corrupt people in this way that isn't there before?

[Matt]

I think, like, the power and control that you start to feel is just like. It has to feel like you're kind of Godlike, where no one could, like, touch you. But I. I wonder is in the first episode, because I watched the whole thing, the part where he's talking about, like, his abusive stepdad.

[Leah]

No.

[Matt]

Okay. So I think it's always been there because there's, like, a line he says about his abusive stepdad going like, it's a shame he died because I would have enjoyed killing him. That, like, is, like, so insane that you're like, this guy is. Has always been this way.

[Leah]

Yeah, yeah, it will. That kind of vengeance. And being beat in that way just, like, knocks. If you're never taught empathy or shown any kindness, you just, like, don't have a chance. I was watching, like, a Instagram reel the other day, which is. I shouldn't even say that. Like, if I have any information, it's from a Instagram reel, but it really does not even need to be said anymore. So I was. I was living. And so I, you know, came across this video of, like, these inmates that were doing some kind of, like. Like, therapy session one day at the thing, and they all stood in a circle in the yard. And then, like, in the middle was this therapist being, like, step forward. If you were raised by one parent, and then they, like, all, step forward, step forward. If you, you know, witnessed animal abuse in your life, step forward. If you witnessed abuse. And it's just like, all of them. And it's like they pretty much are. Like, these people didn't have a chance. Like, they never were shown even an ounce of love or compassion or even example of it in any part of their life. Can you really blame them that they ended up here? And it was so sweet because there was this one guy that was like, this was the. This was the literal best day of my entire life. And it was, like, the first time he had ever, like, talked about his feelings. And he's, like, sitting in this prison. He's like an old man withering away, and it's the best day of his life that, like, a compassionate woman came in and, like, asked him how he's feeling or, like, how he was raised. It's like, it's so poor people. We're so lucky if, like, we even anyone care about us at all ever once, because some people don't have it literally ever.

[Nikki Glaser]

Mm.

[Leah]

True.

[Nikki Glaser]

Yeah. No, it's sad. That's where we're heading. Nature and nurture is definitely. Nurture is important. So is nature. But, like, I think you can overcome a lot of nature problems with nurture. And, yeah, there are people. It doesn't even have to be, like, an abusive parent. It can be, like, so little, too. That makes. That sets you down that path and makes you lose that ability to empathize and be, you know, a member of society.

[Leah]

Yeah.

[Matt]

It never even. This. I guess this is not very empathetic of me, but it never crossed my mind that people are actually going through their life without that, especially because I've dedicated my entire life to seeking out the approval and love of others. Yes. So it's, like, so baffling to me that somebody could make it that far and be like. Like, no one's ever asked me how I'm doing.

[Leah]

No. Whenever I see, like, someone in public blaring their phone and listening to it full volume, I mean, there's a part of me that. I think the first part of me is just like, what a. How could you even be that kind of person that has no regard for anyone around you? And we. We all want to hear this sermon or whatever you're listening to at full volume and not even good speakers. Like, your phone fell in some water and it sounds tinny, and you're blasting it in this common area. And then I realized, oh, my God, this person never had a parent look out for them in terms of their, like, hearing. They probably were blaring the TV and screaming while that kid was sleeping that the kid is that person has no example in their life of someone being like, hey, let's let me, like, respect you. And so why would they show it to anyone else?

[Nikki Glaser]

Yeah.

[Leah]

And that's kind of like what it's about. Like, I just. I have to remember that more times than when I get, like, upset about how someone's acting or, like, and just the idea that, you know, like, the idea that anyone thinks anyone, like, wants to be homeless. Because there's this whole argument now about homeless people. It's like, they don't even want help. You try to give them help, and they're. They. You have to want it, and they don't even. They want to be on the streets. It's like, no one really wants to be on the streets. They're there, and they've been, like, hurt by the system, and so they don't have an option. But, like, no, they didn't actually start. Just, like, they just don't. They don't love, like, camping so much that they were just like, oh, I want to end up here. People don't choose to do drugs and become drug addicts. Like, they're predisposed to do it. And you would, too, if you had their whole, whole life. But people just seem to think, I would never do that.

[Nikki Glaser]

I think they love camping. I think that they went to rei, they spent too much money, and they were like, well, I guess we have to use all this stuff.

[Leah]

Yeah, it's just, you know, it's. But I have to be reminded of it all the time because I constantly am getting mad at my fellow man and being like, how could you do that? Or think like that? But it's like, okay, if I was them. I think like that, too. But, no, thank God I'm not.

[Matt]

Yeah. I am so thankful that I guess my parents were the people who were like, never do heroin, or, like, the DARE program did not work. The DARE program made drugs seem so fudgeing cool. Like, oh, yeah. Like, I'll never forget.

[Leah]

Scared me.

[Matt]

Did it scare you? Oh, they played Pressure by Billy Joel, and they're like, this is what cocaine feels like. And I was like, this song is incredible. I can't wait to do cocaine.

[Leah]

Oh, my God. No, I think it. I just wanted to be good, though. Did you not want to be good, like, and not get in trouble? That's what scared me of drugs, I think.

[Matt]

I, I. There was definitely a shift where I started wanting to get into trouble a little bit.

[Leah]

Because you're such a good boy. Like, you follow all the rules, like, as someone who's worked with you, you like are like, have the assignment in right on time. You're just like, aim to please in like of, you know, in not a way that you're like scared and like, oh, whatever you want. But like, you seem to like to be good or do I do like.

[Matt]

Being good later for you or. It was way later.

[Leah]

Yeah, like interesting.

[Matt]

I like poking buttons and I liked, like, I really hated.

[Leah]

Oh, I've seen that side of you as well, by the way. I have. I've seen that. That's. When did I see that come out of you where you were kind of being a little rabble rouser and I don't even know what that. But I was like, oh, Shawn, there's like some time where you were kind of like being a little bit where there's just someone that like, I could tell was annoying you and you're like, I'm gonna let him have it. And I really enjoyed it.

[Matt]

But yeah, no, they needed to really break me down.

[Leah]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I can do it sometimes too. I'll give an example when we get back right after this.

[Matt]

Hi, I'm Matt.

[Leah]

And I'm Leah and we're from the Grown Up Stuff podcast.

[Matt]

And just in time for tax season. On this week's episode, we're chatting with CPA Lisa Green Lewis about how small businesses can tackle their taxes using TurboTax Business.

[Leah]

A Forbes study mentioned that a whopping 93% of small businesses overpay their taxes.

[Matt]

And 17% of Gen Zers believed that.

[Leah]

You could write off any expense as a business expense.

[Matt]

So can't blame them. It's really important to do your taxes right. Listen to Grown up stuff on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your favorite podcasts. Grown up stuff.

[Leah]

Hey. So we quickly want to touch on something serious. We talked about it when it came out, but wow, that commercial with Tom Brady and Snoop Dogg for stand up to all hate has really stuck with me. Those two just like having it out with each other and telling each other why they hate each other and all the reasons. You're just like, wow, this is what most hate is based off of. Fear, insecurity, and jealousy. It's really just gotta stop. Too many people from too many different groups are facing too much hate in our country and especially online. So join me in Standing up to all hate. If you see it, speak up. Call it out. Use one of the most powerful tools there is in this fight, your voice. You can learn more by following OTs upwithhate or show your support by posting the blue square emoji and using the hashtag standuptoallhate. During tax season, your sensitive info does a lot of traveling to places you can't control, stopping off at payroll, your accountant or tax preparer, and countless other data centers on its way to the irs. Any of them can expose you to identity theft because they all have the info on your W2. Just the ticket for criminals to steal your identity. No wonder the IRS reported tax fraud due to identity theft went up 20% last year. You need Lifelock. They monitor millions of data points per second and alert you to threats you could miss. If your identity is stolen, LifeLock's US based restoration specialists will fix it, backed by the million dollar protection package and restoration is guaranteed or your money back. Don't let identity thieves take you for a ride. Get Lifelock protection for tax season and beyond. Join now and save up to 40% your first year. Call 1-800-LIFELOCK and use promo code iheart or go to lifelock.com iheart for 40% off. Terms apply. Don't miss your window of opportunity. Upgrade your space now during Blinds.com's anniversary sale and save up to 50% sitewide. Blinds.com elevate your windows with the number one online retailer of custom window treatments. Blinds.com offers hundreds of premium window treatment options. Choose from woven wood and Roman shades to blinds, motorized shades and more, all designed to fit your budget without sacrificing quality. Blinds.com brings the showroom to you with free virtual consultations and samples delivered directly to your door, fast and free. Our design experts can help schedule a professional measure and installation, plus guidance for DIYers too. Blind Blinds.com has been trusted for 29 years, earning thousands of five star reviews. Shop with confidence, knowing you'll get upfront pricing, no hidden fees and Blinds.com's 100% satisfaction guarantee. But hurry, these savings won't last. Shop Blinds.com's anniversary sale happening right now for up to 50% off site wide. Save up to 50% site wide at Blinds.com, rules and restrictions may apply. So this past week there was a circumstance where I was getting ready for something and a producer was talking to me about a thing I was gonna do. And it was someone that I just, I had spoken with on the phone. We had a really good conversation, but then I met them in person. They were kind of like talking to me about what I was about to do and they said that I couldn't mention this part of myself that there's nothing wrong with mentioning it, but it's like a conflict of interest within the thing I was gonna be on. Like, let's say I was gonna be in an ad for Sephora. It would have been like mentioning, like, one time I shopped at Ulta or I was in the ad for Walmart, and I was like, I just. Part of it was like, let's say, like, my grandfather started Target. Like, I wasn't allowed to say anything about my grandfather. And it's like, but that's who I am. Do you know what I mean? This isn't really tracking, but it's, like, literally a part of who I am I couldn't mention because of a conflict of interest within this other thing. And I understood it was, like, way above his pay grade where this kind of was coming down, this. This. This mandate. But I was annoyed because it wasn't told to me before, and I didn't really know who was. I knew where it was coming from, but it was just kind of getting to me too late. And I was like, in the makeup chair. And I just said to this really nice guy, I go, this would have been nice to know that I can't say this part of myself beforehand, because I never would do this if. If I knew that I couldn't say this.

[Nikki Glaser]

Oh, slam.

[Leah]

And I go. And then. And he was just like, good to know. And I was like, so just next time, like, I just need to. Like that. I just know I wouldn't be here right now if I would have known this ahead of time. And I wasn't trying to be an asshole. It was just true. Like, it was.

[Nikki Glaser]

Really wanted to talk about Target.

[Leah]

I really did. My grandfather, Earl Target, I felt was an important part of my origin story. Anyway, so I said that. And then I instantly was like, oh, that might be kind of bitchy. And I don't want this guy to. I also. I don't want this guy to feel like I'm mad at him. I go, listen, I know it's. This is your. This is not your. Your decision. You're just the person. You're just the messenger. I'm not mad at you. I'm just letting you know, like, that I'm. I'm kind of pissed off. And. And then he. Then we, like, joked about something else, and everything was fine. And then my makeup artist, after he left, was like, that was so badass. Like, you stood up for yourself. You let him know, like, exactly. Like, I wouldn't be here. Right now. I didn't say fucking, but she was like, you let him know you wouldn't be here, and that was so cool. And then you, like, totally, like, made him feel comfortable again by, like, joking and smiling and laughing about something to let him know that, like, it was okay. And I really appreciated that she noticed that because it wasn't insincere that I was, like, trying to make him feel better. I wasn't like, and I love your shirt. Like, just giving him some kind of flimsy compliment to, like, soothe him. I really did feel bad like, this. It's not this guy's fault. He's just doing his job. And I wanted to reestablish, like, we're still cool, man. Like, we're still joking. It's still fine. Because I feel like I can be both. Like, I want to be able to let people know exactly how I feel, but I also want to be able to just instantly go back to being friends. Like, I, like, I think sometimes people misconstrue when I, like, I'm like, hey, we're not doing that, and I don't want to do that again. Don't bring it up. And they're like, oh, my God, Nikki's mad at me. I'll never recover from this. She's going to fire me. This is all bad. And I, like, I. But to me, I'm just like, oh. I'm just saying, like, what I feel in the moment and that's doesn't. It's not going to negatively impact the rest of our lives. It's just, like, a thing I needed to know, right? It's like, hey, by the way, we're not doing that. And I never want to make a joke like that or, like, whatever I'm saying. And then I feel like I forget sometimes that, like, it's other people aren't inside my brain and don't know that, like, I'm fine. So I feel like I, for once in my life, did a good job of kind of, like, re establishing that we're okay, like, without having to say it. And he walked away feeling okay.

[Matt]

I think that's interesting because I think it's funny that you put it back on yourself, because I do think when you do that, I think everyone is kind of not used to pure honesty. Like, especially in Hollywood, where everyone is, like, double speaking and, like, really not.

[Nikki Glaser]

Positive all the time.

[Matt]

All positive. Which, by the way, is exactly how this person got into this situation, is they knew that you couldn't do that, but they had to wait to the last moment because they're like, by the.

[Nikki Glaser]

Way, you can't tell any jokes, right?

[Matt]

Yeah.

[Leah]

Yes.

[Nikki Glaser]

Yeah.

[Leah]

Yes.

[Nikki Glaser]

No jokes. It is super serious.

[Leah]

It's just being direct. And I think that a lot of times being direct is misconstrued for being mean. Yeah, well, you're setting, Giving a boundary and saying, I don't like when you do that, or, I don't like when that's happening. It doesn't mean I hate you. And I think we are all a lot of people, including myself, I, I, you know, I'm trying to consider what I'd be like on the other side of this. But, like, when someone gives me a boundary of, like, like, hey, I really don't like when you do that. Like, I could. I can take that and make a meal of it and be like, well, then I'm the worst person in the world, and if that one part of me is bad, then I must be the worst all over. And I. I do that all the time, so I should have more empathy about it. But I just feel like, you know, a lot of times it's gotten back to me later on of, like, I thought you hated me because you said that one thing, and I'm like, oh, I just was like, I don't want that brand of water anymore or whatever. I think, I think that's, like, the stigmata that women have to carry that when you' direct and you ask for something, you're kind of labeled as, like, either emotional or a. So I think it's harder for women to do that, whereas with men, it's kind of like, oh, wow, look, he's taking the leadership role. He's. He's a line in the sand. Right? But one of the qualities that I really. Well, many qualities that I admire about Nikki, and I know that, like, you don't like to be set on this pedestal as, like, you know, like, advancing the women's agenda. But, like, you're so good about setting these boundaries in, like, a very assertive but neutral way. And you're also really good at asking for what you want, which I think it's so challenging for women to do it because we are more inclined to be, like, emotional, so we just overthink it, but you don't have that, which is really an admirable quality. It's me saying, no one drinks at this, at this table. You don't need to tell us the drink menu. Like, it's. Instead of just, like, sitting there and listening to it to be polite or, like, yeah. Yes. You know, when the waiter, like, I find my friends, like, when the waiter is like, does we have any dietary restrictions? Like, Kirsten, if you're listening, like, hey, so I have a man like, Mango. If there's mango anything, it's just like, I can't have mango. Like, if, like, if literally anything in mango, I'm gonna die. So just no mango. Like, it's not. It's not mad at him.

[Nikki Glaser]

Yeah.

[Leah]

It's just, like, we don't need to be like, I'm sorry. Like, Mango. She's a nice, nice person. And so, like, I get that. That goes. And I can be thought of as rather harsh sometimes.

[Nikki Glaser]

Sure. The song and dance is getting harder and harder. I feel like as I get older, you.

[Leah]

You're like this, too, Brian. Like, you're really direct and, like, you can come off as rude when you're just saying exactly how you feel.

[Nikki Glaser]

Yeah.

[Leah]

And I was saying this to you. I think Sean and I were talking about you behind your back the other day, and we were like. I was being. I was being comical when I said that, but. And I don't know if it was behind your back. We could have been facing you. We were just in a different.

[Nikki Glaser]

Like, I heard it all.

[Leah]

We were in Canada. We could have been facing the same way. But you lit. I don't. Based on latitude, longitude. I don't know if we're literally behind your back, but we were talking about how, like, you. You're not a. You will never lie. And, like, we even talked about that the other day on the podcast of, like, oh, you. And you were like, I would just tell them the truth, or I would be. I would want to know. Because I'm like, why would you lie to me? And I'm like, brian doesn't lie. He's just, like, always gonna to shoot you straight. Like, I never question where I stand with Brian. I'm never like, is he mad at me about something? But I think that you probably encounter that a lot where people, like, think you're mad or something, and you're like, what? Like, has that happened to you a lot?

[Nikki Glaser]

Well, when I was. I had to, like, learn how to turn this down, because I remember when I was, like, in my 20s or maybe even a little younger, I would. Jokingly, as a joke, I'd pretend to be angry or upset about.

[Leah]

Oh, yeah, I've seen that, too. Yeah. Yeah.

[Nikki Glaser]

And it just always backfires where it's like, oh, my God. And then it becomes a big thing. And it. Because I. It's exactly what you were saying. Where it's like, in my head, I know that I'm all cool and everything's fine, but to them, they just see some guy yelling, yeah, that's not good. So there was. I mean, there was one. There was a moment in time, I think I've talked about it before in history, where I realized, oh, my God, I got to stop doing this. And it was during an improv warmup or whatever I was at. I was at an improv theater, and there were these two people who I know who are on my improv team who are talking, and I was just walking towards them, and as a joke, I thought I was like, get out of my way, and I went right through the middle of them. Funny. Like, imagine if I actually did that. Yeah, well, I actually did just do that.

[Leah]

No. Yeah, you did actually do it. And there are people that would actually do that, and you might be one of them.

[Nikki Glaser]

Oh, no.

[Matt]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Nikki Glaser]

So I had to like, okay, I gotta be like. And I'm just kidding. After I do it, maybe.

[Leah]

But we were talking about how sometimes you will. You, like, in a writer's room, like, if something's not funny, you'll just say something. Like, you'll be like, yeah, we could do that. Or we could do something that's funny. Something like that. And you're not trying to even be like, sometimes I think you're trying to be comical the way you're, like, presenting that and trying to just kind of, like, you know, just bust balls a little bit. But sometimes you will literally say that like, you're not even insulting, because everyone's allowed to not be funny sometimes. Like, in your world, I'm imagining, like. Like, you're not funny sometimes, or like, you've presented something that isn't good so you don't feel bad calling it out in someone else, whereas everyone else is like, we all have to, like, just fake laugh at everything everyone says and go, yeah, maybe that would work, but not right now.

[Nikki Glaser]

Project as good as possible.

[Leah]

So a quick note. Exactly. Is. Is totally. It's not tied to your identity. And. And I think the. That. That's what I've learned in writers rooms, because I. I've never been on the other side of it as a writer, and so I've never felt the rejection that I think I would feel if someone was like, no, not that one. Like, oh, God, you know, like, it would. But you guys have kind of grown, like, a callous to that, because I know, Sean, you're Very sensitive to that. More so than I think even Brian would be about, like, having a joke or an idea rejected. And now you. It's. You have an immunity to it at this point.

[Matt]

There's definitely an immunity. But I also know, like, I could for some reason, the only place I'm empathetic is, like, in a writer's room. And I know exactly how people are feeling at all times.

[Leah]

Yeah.

[Matt]

And, like, that's why I really enjoy teaming up with Brian, because I feel like he has a paternal energy and I have a maternal energy and.

[Leah]

Yes.

[Matt]

And like, especially the gloves room. I was like, looking around being like, all right, I know who's feeling a little insecure. So I know who I could, like, compliment so they'll do a better job.

[Leah]

Yes, yes. It's. You got to. I do want to, like, take care of people's feelings all the time. And I feel like I am aware of, like, if someone's, you know, uncomfortable or whatever. But I. I definitely have those blind spots because I'm definitely someone that people have told me is like. Like, I'm just harsh and I'll just tell you exactly how I feel or if I don't like something and. But what I have, what I notice, I do do that I really want to, like, stop doing is when I'm having an insecurity, like, finding a way to blame someone else for it. I think it's like, I get it from my dad of like, like, you know, if my hair looks shitty, like, I'm just like, well, you know, like, I'll blame whoever did my hair last or something. Or like, not. I won't talk, even think about my diet, which is not like, good for my hair or, like, what. Whatever it is, like. Or I'll be like, well, I'm not getting it. If I'm not getting enough sleep, my publicists aren't looking out for me and they're not looking at my schedule and Chris is. It look like I have to find someone else to blame when really it's just like, just let it be instead of trying to. Like, when I'm. When I'm under slept, it just becomes like a blame game. And I really hate that so much.

[Matt]

It's so hard not to blame others. Like, especially because, like, you know, like, you know, sometimes it is other people's fault. Like, occasionally I'm like, I didn't. Like, I really half assed this and I know that. So I'm like, I could be hard on myself for that, but most of the time I'M like, totally willing to be like, no. I could really get to the point, bottom of this and tell you exactly whose fault this was.

[Nikki Glaser]

Wow.

[Matt]

And it wasn't mine.

[Nikki Glaser]

I'm the exact opposite. I blame myself exclusively. Well, I could have done better. I should have worked harder. I should have figured out that this person was going to do this, and I should have been able to.

[Leah]

What if you. So I took someone's advice once and I. It's something that I deeply regret that I did. Like, in a performance that I had. And I took some advice and, like, I didn't even question it. I was just like, the person was so sure of it that I was like, yeah, I'm gonna do that. And then I did it. And I look back and I'm like, oh, that's the one thing I like, why did I do it that way? But it was like, the person that was giving me advice was just so confident and so, like, like, just sure of it that I took it and I wanted to blame them so much of like, that person, like, sabotaged my performance. But it's like, but you listened. So, like, I. I had to then go, it is not that person's fault whatsoever. That person actually did believe they were confident. So I can't be mad at them for being confident. Confident. And I have to be better about knowing my gut and what works. Even, like, with my house. I'm like, you, Like, I'm starting to have, like, a little bit of, like, cold feet of like, do I really want this? And I'm like, well, my mom really liked it. And then Chris's mom really liked it. Now I'm like, feeling like now I am like, I don't even know if I like it or if I'm just liking it because of them. And it's like, well, that's still your fault. Like, you still need to. You can't blame other people's influence. Influence.

[Nikki Glaser]

It's the. I'm not going to name names, but it's the. The Golden Globes host prior to use problem, which is like, you're blaming your writers, but ultimately you chose to tell those jokes.

[Leah]

Yep, yep. And that's. I get. I get there almost right away now, like, where I'm like, I have a knee jerk response of like, oh, that's their fault. And I'm like, no, it's like, I. Okay, great. Now this is a lesson that, like, the next time someone is emphatic, I have that feeling of like, whoa. I thought the other thing, but, man, this person's really confident about this. Just give it one. Talk to one more person about it. One more. Like, don't just, like, blindly trust. And now I'll be more perceptive of that. It's just like, these lessons just keep coming in, like they'll never end.

[Matt]

You're. You're right. I mean, I succumb to this all the time. Like, confidence is the most assuring thing in the entire world. If somebody is confident with me, I'm like, well, they have all of life's answers. I should. Yeah, I should absolutely get in the back of their van.

[Leah]

Yeah. Yeah. Like, I'm talking to my mom. Oh, sorry.

[Nikki Glaser]

The. The key to. I think you do this too. So, like, the key to being blunt successfully and saying, like, something's bad, something's good is to also be free and open with your compliments. Like, if you think something. Like, sometimes people are just negative all time. But if you think something's good, you also have to be blunt about that.

[Leah]

Yes.

[Nikki Glaser]

And that's how it evens out. Then you're just a good judge of things as opposed to just being a negative piece of judgment.

[Matt]

That's beautiful.

[Leah]

I love that. Yeah. You can be blunt either way. Yeah. And just because. And let. Yeah. Just don't hold back anything.

[Nikki Glaser]

Like, there were times during the globes where I was like, no, not. Not effusive about a joke. But then there were other times where I was like, I think this might be the best joke that was ever written.

[Leah]

Yes. Yes. And we. We would often tell people if that person was, like, in the bathroom while you said that about them, we would be like, when you were gone. Brian said, this was the best joke ever written. And everyone' yeah, it was so exciting to relay that because, you know, there.

[Nikki Glaser]

Was one joke that I did say that, but do I remember what it was? We didn't wind up using it.

[Leah]

It was someone who was sitting to the left of me. Who was sitting. It was shot. Maybe it was. Who was sitting the left. No, it wasn't. John. Max. It was. I forget. I don't think we ended up using it, but it was something. Well, there was one moment, one moment that, like, I think was, like. One of the funniest moments was when I think we'd already talked about it, but it's funny to repeat again when we were trying to get the word still out of a. Like we said still too many times in one joke. Like, we had started off where it's still time to say this and. And we needed to stay still again. But you don't want to say the still twice in one joke. So we were like, how do we get that still out? Like, we gotta take it out. And we're like, struggling. It's like. But I think we need it. And Noah. I think it was Noah Garfinkel, right?

[Matt]

Yeah.

[Leah]

Look, if we really need it, we can just put it in another Jo. Like, like it was about the whole act itself. Like, with this still just needs to be somewhere in there. That. That was so fudgeing funny.

[Nikki Glaser]

Okay, I'm remembering a little bit. I don't remember the joke, but it was a Jess Dweck joke.

[Leah]

Okay.

[Nikki Glaser]

It was. I think it was about Wicked and I don't remember the joke, but I remember that was the best joke ever written.

[Matt]

Oh, yes. Where we were certain. We were asserted that we had cracked the case.

[Nikki Glaser]

Yeah.

[Matt]

Like, oh, no. Wicked Wick was the bane of December for.

[Nikki Glaser]

Because we said that we were going to give out a trophy to whoever cracked the Wicked joke.

[Leah]

Didn't even what it. Okay. I guess the what cracked. It was my. It was a Wicked was amazing. I loved it. My boyfriend loved it. My boyfriend's boyfriend really loved it. Was that our. That was our Wicked, like, crescendo.

[Matt]

I. Yeah, yeah.

[Nikki Glaser]

I think Conan cracked it in the Oscars. I. I really liked his Wicked joke.

[Leah]

What was his Wicked joke?

[Nikki Glaser]

His Wicked joke was, you know, how we all love the. The. The wizard of Oz. What if we took all of the supporting characters that we didn't even care about about and find a story where they're going to college?

[Leah]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, they're like, yeah, that's pretty good. There was some. It was fun to watch the monologue and see, like, oh, we were really close to that joke, but we didn't quite get it. Or like, oh, we did do that joke, but we didn't. We didn't keep it. Or like, oh, there was one in.

[Nikki Glaser]

Particular that we like that was like, oh, man. We came up with that joke and we didn't use it. And then Conan, Remember I felt that.

[Matt]

At least three or four times in the monologue where we had tried out that joke and like, it. We. We cut it and then whatever reason. Yeah, like, because. Yeah. Like, just through testing, we like, yeah.

[Leah]

Or it wasn't like, because a lot of jokes just didn't work because of the rest of it. Like, it was like, there's. That's not to say that if Conan did a joke that we decided not to do or some version of it, it's because like it wasn't a good joke. It like it didn't fit with the rest of the tone of whatever one of them was.

[Nikki Glaser]

We seriously discussed for a long time the possibility of doing a sand worm costume that appears in, in the audience.

[Leah]

Oh really?

[Nikki Glaser]

Did it? Yeah, no, we talked about it for a long time. I remember because I was in the park.

[Matt]

It came up, it came up like maybe five times.

[Leah]

They killed it with that. That was so fun. So silly. Yeah, I was, I went to my parents house last night. Again. I didn't spend the night but I went to go hang out with them and yeah, I was talking about what it was. I just about to say. Did Julie show you her new spear? Yeah, they did show me their. They found, they found in Indian artifact. Native American artifacts. Do we say Indian anymore?

[Nikki Glaser]

Depends on what you're talking about.

[Leah]

Well, I've heard Indian casino a ton and I'm like, doesn't that, that doesn't sound appropriate to me.

[Nikki Glaser]

I mean I don't, I, I, I think in the commercials for Indian casinos they still say Indian casinos.

[Leah]

They do. I just saw advert over the place in this dfw. I was walking around and said Indian casino is some. And I was like, is that a. Okay.

[Nikki Glaser]

I'm sure there are some.

[Matt]

Casino is too verbose.

[Nikki Glaser]

Like, you know, like I'm sure there are some Indians who don't mind Indians and I'm sure there are some Native Americans who don't mind Native Americans. And I think it's up to the individual to decide what they want to be called.

[Leah]

Well, my parents found Native American spears. They love looking for arrowheads. That is a big part, part of their relationship and just my dad loves, my dad loves Native American culture and reading about, he knows everything about that. And so he, they, they're always like looking at riverbanks and for hours and they, they found two the other day and I asked my, my mom picked me up from the airport and she was like, your dad? And I found two arrowheads and I go, is, I go, is yours better than his? And she goes, you know it really.

[Nikki Glaser]

Found arrowheads like recently.

[Leah]

Yeah, they find them all the time. Like it's crazy. Yeah, my dad has hundreds. Nikki, don't say that. People are going to try to steal them. They're worth literally nothing. Please don't go steal my parents. Missouri Indian artifacts.

[Matt]

They need a safe deposit box.

[Leah]

Exactly. That's where they are. So you can't even find them in our house. Please.

[Nikki Glaser]

Wait, so they find these on like this in the side of a river?

[Leah]

Yeah, like on river.

[Nikki Glaser]

They're like, isn't that like incredibly hard and difficult to find an arrowhead?

[Leah]

I think they're. No, not in my family. And they follow a guy online who like finds them every day. Like multiple ones every day. They're like all over the place. Like they, they were, you know, before we got to this land. I think they were around for hundreds and hundreds, maybe thousands of years. I don't really know anything. And so. And they were cutting things all the time, you know, and that's how they ate. So there's like thousand lived here before us, hate to tell you. A pair, allegedly.

[Matt]

Yeah, I think, I think they were put there with the dinosaur bones.

[Leah]

Right. Use us. That's a good point. But yeah, I'm, I'm impressed by it too. It's like, it's insane. But my sister, my brother in law find them all the time because they're, you know, out in nature and. Yeah, whenever we were kids, whenever there would be like a, a field we were driving past that would be freshly tilled, we would have to like pull over and, and they would go like, look. And you know, it's fun because like an Easter egg hunt, when you find one, you just like are so excited and yeah, it's a cool, it's a really cool thing actually. During your wedding, Brian, when I was in wherever that was, Colorado, what was the town called?

[Nikki Glaser]

Grand Lake.

[Leah]

Grand Lake, Colorado, there was a shop that had a bunch of fake arrowheads and I bought a handful of them to trick my parents and like sprinkle about like whenever I would go out to their cabin. I haven't been out. And Chris thought that was the most diabolical thing he had ever heard of. Nikki, you cannot do that to your parents. And I'm like, it's a joke. Like, and it'll make them happy. I'll never even tell them they're not real. Like they don't get them checked, you know, Know, like they won't know and it'll just make them happy. I think it's actually a nice thing to do. But if they hear this podcast then I guess.

[Nikki Glaser]

Yeah, like there was a commercial where I forgot what it was for. It's like for Duracell batteries or something where one of the daughters was really into dinosaurs. Yeah, this parents daughter was into dinosaurs. So she got a bunch of fake bones and buried them in the backyard so that she could find the bones. And. No, I find that to be diabolical.

[Leah]

I think it's diabolical. I think it is. I recently did something like that to my nephew and I feel really, really bad. I'll tell you when we go back from break.

[Matt]

Hi, I'm Matt.

[Leah]

And I'm Leah and we're from the Grown Up Stuff podcast.

[Matt]

And just in time for tax season. On this week's episode, we're chatting with CPA Lisa Green Lewis about how small businesses can tackle their taxes using TurboTax Business.

[Leah]

A Forbes study mentioned that a whopping 93% of small businesses overpay their tax.

[Matt]

Taxes and 17% of Gen Zers believed.

[Leah]

That you could write off any expense.

[Matt]

As a business expense. So can't blame them. It's really important to do your taxes right. Listen to Grown up stuff on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your favorite podcasts. Grown Up Stuff.

[Leah]

Hey. So we quickly want to touch on something. Something serious. We talked about it when it came out, but wow. That commercial with Tom Brady and Snoop Dogg for Stand up to All Hate has really stuck with me. Those two just like having it out with each other and telling each other why they hate each other and all the reasons. You're just like, wow. This is what most hate is based off of fear, insecurity and jealousy. It's really just gotta stop. Too many people from too many different groups are facing too much hate in our country and especially online. So join me in Standing up to All Hate. If you see it, speak up. Call it out. Use one of the most powerful tools there is in this fight your voice. You can learn more by following OTs upwithhate or show your support by posting the blue square emoji and using the hashtag Standup to All Hate. Who doesn't love the good things in life? Even though I enjoy a little luxury, it doesn't mean I can always afford it. Until I discovered Quince. Quince is my go to for luxury essentials at affordable prices. Prices. I like to look like I'm spending a lot of money, but I don't like to spend a lot of money. And if you're like me, you got to go to Quince. Quince offers a range of high quality items at prices that are within reach. Do you want 100 Mongolian cashmere sweater from $50? Well they got them washable silk tops and dresses, organic cotton sweaters and 14 karat gold jewelry. The best part is all quince Items are priced 50 to 80 less than similar brands. My sister actually got me a cardigan from Quince. It is a staple of my wardrobe that I didn't even know I needed, but I will have for years and years to come. I love their stuff. It's such high quality. They partner directly with top factories, they cut out the cost of the middleman, and they pass the savings on to us. So give yourself the luxury you deserve. With quints. Go to quince.com Nikki for free shipping on your order and 365 day returns. That's Q-U-I-N-C E.com Nikki to get free shipping and 365 day returns. Quints.com Nikki from prioritizing time to keep our bodies active to simply creating space to check on our, well, happiness Lab listeners take their health very seriously. But when it comes to treating complex issues like heart disease, neurological disorders, or even cancer, the right care can make all the difference. That's why Cleveland Clinic has been elevating world class patient care for over a century. Whether they're raising the bar in heart care, uncovering the mysteries of the brain, or researching new treatments for cancer, Cleveland Clinic continues to redefine what's possible, possible for every breakthrough in health, for every care in the world. Explore a wide array of health and wellness information by visiting clevelandclinic.org today. I already told this story in the podcast, but my we, we made it seem like my nephew broke a world record for sitting on a ball. On a ball.

[Nikki Glaser]

What happened? Wait, did. Was there a fallout?

[Leah]

Yeah, he like bragged about it at school and then one of his schoolmates said that he had sat longer on a ball than my neck nephew did, which was, I think he did an hour and three minutes. And someone at his school did an hour and five minutes or something and didn't get a record, so didn't get a certificate. And so he was like, I know it's fake. And so I felt so bad because I'm like, oh my God, I made my nephew look stupid at school. Like, that's. I didn't even think of the fallout from that. And I should have because I am like, I'm so upset still about my parents never not telling me that Santa wasn't real until so late because I, it made me look so dumb for so long. Long. But you know, you make mistakes. I learned I won't do that to him again.

[Nikki Glaser]

Here's how you make up for it. You gotta find the other kids that told him he was a liar and get him. No, you gotta trick. Yeah, you can either get a certificate or you can tell them something wrong. About, like, the Grand Canyon or something so that they're. They have some stupid thing rattling.

[Matt]

Yeah. Show up at the.

[Leah]

Wow.

[Matt]

I would. I would say show up at the school, find that kid. Kid and be like, hey, listen, I'm this boy's aunt. Santa isn't real.

[Nikki Glaser]

Shatter it.

[Matt]

Yeah. Destroy him.

[Leah]

He just can be like, my aunt is famous, and that will be a currency for the rest of his life that I actually do think about as a gift giving to my niece and nephews. I do think that is a gift. I don't care. I don't look at it like, wow, I'm famous. I don't walk around like that. But I know that if I were a kid, final thing thought, I know if I were a kid, yeah, I would have killed for a famous aunt or uncle. I mean, I remember one time my. My t. TV Bob, my uncle tv was on TV one time for a segment for being a mailman. And I talked about that endlessly. I was like, my uncle was on tv. So I'm like, I do think it's. There's. Part of the reason I like success is so that people in my life can brag about it. So whenever someone is like, I didn't tell them, I know you, I'm always like, please. That is the only reason I do this. Isn't that. That's, like, a cool thing to friends and family?

[Nikki Glaser]

I mean, I'm kidding you. Like, I don't do it for myself.

[Leah]

I do it for them.

[Nikki Glaser]

I tell people that Nikki Glaser is my aunt all the time.

[Leah]

Do it, Brian. Do it. We have a really weird family where. Yeah, I know. I love it.

[Matt]

That's. That should be every child's dream. Like, when I was 10, at basketball camp, I told everyone I was Chris Farley's cousin.

[Leah]

Great. Yes.

[Matt]

And, like, I'm not.

[Leah]

But, Sean, even you. Sometimes I'm like, no one. Like, you'll. I'll be on the road with you or something and be able to be like, how should I introduce you? And you're like, say Comedy Central. And just like, he's a guy. And I'm like, how about. You were like, Norm MacDonald's best friend and opener and, like, like. And you were, you know, like, having a Norm MacDonald next to your name and, like, being. Having the approval of Norm MacDonald is, like, the best achievement in comedy, like, any comedian, and, like, instantly gives you this, like, status within our community, even with fans of comedy. And that's always surprising to me that you, like, kind of hold back on. On that.

[Matt]

Oh, I just, like, I. I'm just so, so embarrassed to give credits. Like, I really wish I, I could still do clubs and colleges all over.

[Leah]

We can. We'll still let you have that. But like, what is that in you that like, finally reached that level where, like, you know, if someone would have asked you what your dream job would have been when you first got in this business, it would have been like being buddies with Norm MacDonald, like writing for him, writing with him, being on the road with him, and then you achieve it and you don't want to talk about. About it.

[Matt]

I don't.

[Leah]

What is that?

[Matt]

I don't know. I. You know what? This is actually a great thing that I should probably bring up in therapy because, like, it really was like my dream.

[Leah]

It's.

[Nikki Glaser]

Maybe it's your. Maybe it's like low self esteem. Like, you don't believe that you deserve that type of.

[Leah]

I think that's it too, because you also don't. You. Didn't we just talk about this? Don't you feel like you tricked Norm in some way and that he actually, even though he did tell you you were hilarious, you still think you, like, somehow tricked Norm?

[Matt]

Yeah, I, I thought I tricked him or he was fudgeing with me and I can't. I'm constantly going between the two.

[Leah]

God, it's like even once you get it, you can't even. It will never. Like we were talking about this. It will never land. The other night we were talking about with Emily Catalano. We were on the road in Canada backstage and we were talking about, is there any compliment that would ever land for you where you wouldn't kind of go like that, where you wouldn't try to weasel the compliment away or kind of excuse it? And I went through every compliment I could ever get from anyone and I just couldn't really. I couldn't really let any of them in. There was always some kind of excuse I could make of like, they're being nice or, or they've only seen this work that I've done. And that thing was actually really good. But like, the rest of the work I've done was like, crap. And if they really saw that, who did I just see that was talking this way? And I was like, oh, oh, oh. It was this morning. Do I have to say where I saw it? No, I don't. Okay. So this morning I was. My eyes were open, so you know where they were looking. And I saw a thing about. It was Billie Eilish singing beautifully. It's like her and Phineas in their bedroom that they share, I'm guessing. And they were recording, and she's on the bed. She's on their bed. He's at the desk and they're recording. And she does some, like, amazing whisper falsetto. Beautiful. Like, you know, run. And she's singing. And then he goes, all right, that was good. And he, like, stops the tape. And she was like, that was disgusting and horrible. And it sounded literally perfect, right? Like, Billie Eilish, perfect. Perfection. And she was like, ugh. She was like, that's so. I'm so bad. And he was like, no, it wasn't. That was great. And he's like, used to this. You can tell he's, like, used to this at this point. And she's like, I cannot believe we have to have this album done a day before my birthday. He goes, no, we have to have it mastered a day before your birthday. It'll be done weeks before then. She was like, well, it's not going to be because I'm crap, and I always have been crap, and I'm horrible and I'm terrible and I'm the worst singer. And it's just like. It was. I sent it to Chris because I was like, oh, my God, this is. You are Phineas. I am Billy. Like, we only have sex a little, like, once a month when we're in the creative process. There's not, like, a lot of romance going on. No. So I was like, that's so us. Like, it felt really good to see that kind of. It feels really good to see that kind of doubt in someone that is inarguably just insanely talented and almost seems to be naturally talented. Doesn't even have to try, even though I think there's definitely a lot of effort behind it in. In a good way. Like, she's trained, you know? But it was so good to hear her say, like, literally, she's dog. She was like, I'm horrible. And she believes it. I mean, she really believes it in a way that I'm like, that's the way I feel about myself when I'm trying to convince someone who's like, no, you're good. Like, I felt so hard the exact same way she felt. And it felt so good to see someone that I know is inarguably the best feel that way. It was. It's like, that really made my day to see that Billie Eilish is insecure. Of course she is.

[Matt]

Yes. Why wouldn't you? Like, everyone should be insecure. Like, everyone should be Insecurity is. I honestly, feeling secure is just so foreign to me. I love being insecure. I embrace it. And also it helps me push through. I try harder. It's like, yeah, that's the key.

[Nikki Glaser]

Like, insecurity is one way in order for you to become great is if you constantly. It manifests in different ways for different people. But I think like, you need to constantly be saying you're bad in order to actually propel yourself to greatness. I'm sure Michael Jordan was like, this is I'm not good enough. I'm not good enough over and over again. Kobe was probably like that in order to become the great, the great.

[Leah]

But also he didn't. I think there is. I think it's harmful at some point to be like that self loathing. I think there's some happy medium like where you and. Oh, I wanted to share this quick thing about like, let's talk about famous people. I said it yesterday where I've learned about some famous person that actually like, there was a story that really disappointed me. So this weekend in the, at the hotel for the Oscars, Emily was running down to go get something urgently and she had to jump in this elevator that was kind of full because the elevators were kind of all fucked up. You know, she jumped in this elevator and she like immediately felt the vibe in there was like, what are you doing in here? And she got on the elevator and instantly someone. She's standing next to a very famous person. And that person who we all thought was like, cool. I would have been like, oh my God, I can't wait to be friends with this person. The person. That person gave her like a really dirty look. And Emily, by the way, is like, does. She's never like, that person's a bit. She's always like, understanding of like, no, they're a famous person, they should be that way. But she was like, this was so disappointing. And then that person like kind of gave her a look like, what are you doing on this elevator? Even though it's a public elevator, the person, that person's like handler or whatever was like, do you. Are you staying in this hotel? To Emily? And she goes, no, my client is. And she goes, do you really need to be in here right now? And like at almost asked her to get out of the next floor. Emily stayed the whole time. And so she said it was like there was another example of like, there's a person that like Emily once encountered in an elevator who like, it was the vibe at this event where you do not ride the elevator with this person. Like, they. If they're in the elevator, you do not ride with them. Like, they are to ride alone, which is, like, standard. And she accidentally got on this elevator, like, in a rush, because she was in a rush, and she, like, slid in and then she got in and realized, I'm in the elevator with the person. And it was like. And you're just not supposed to. So we. She was like. It was giving that energy. Even though that person, like, deserved to have their own elevator. Like, it wasn't like a bad thing. It was just kind of like the vibe of. It was like the rule, you know, because that person needed to be wherever they need to be. This person, however, didn't need to have this vibe, and it instantly ruined them for me. You'll never know who it is because I'm not going to divulge enough. And just. I just know, though, that I like. I went from, like, loving this person, always watching everything they do on my feed, and I went to, like, almost to the lengths. I'm almost at the point where I'm. Because I got served them so much yesterday. And I'm like, I need to mute this person's name. Like, I don't want to see this person ever again because they were rude to my friend. Not cool. Like, now doesn't surprise me because I'm like, looking at all the signs. I'm like, yeah, of course they're rude. And so our new phrase, when someone. When I like. Because then later on we were talking to, like, my hair and makeup team about this person. We were like, talking shit. And. And then Emily said something that was kind of like, ball busty to me, and I was like, I'm going to need you to get out of my elevator. And so that is our. That's our new phrase for when someone is like. Needs to just stop what they're saying because you're not in the mood for it. You need them to get out of your elevator. So I want to, like, spread that. And I think we can all use that right now of like, hey, I'm going to need you to get out of my elevator right now. We're. You, like, need to be left alone and you need to ride in peace.

[Matt]

Yeah, I love it. I can't believe June Squibb was such a.

[Leah]

Yeah, this person. I'm not even going to give them a gender. Was just like, it's just so disappointing when someone is like, you think they're going to be cool and they're not like, man, It's. I just want to celebrate the people who are cool and, like, here, let me give. Let's end on a high note. I just posted a picture with Jackie Tone, who is on Nobody Wants this, among many others. Other things. She was also in Glow, I believe, but Jackie Tone, T O H, N. So funny, so charismatic, so kind. I ran into her at the Elton John party. We. She, like, invited me into her People magazine, like, photo shoot. We did a picture together. And then Lisa Curry, another comedian, after I posted that picture, wrote to me and was like, I love her so much. And I was like, isn't it? And she just got upgraded to a series regular on Nobody Wants this. She was a, you know, a. A supporting character before, and then they made her a main character, which is, like, speaks to her talent. Like, they only do that when the person, like, people want more of them. And she plays like a. On the show. Like, it's. It's amazing that she's able to build this character. Like, she just shines. She's so good. But Lisa Curry wrote to me and was like. She was so nice to me at this one event. She, like, remembered my name, was so kind. And we were both just like, isn't it great when nice people are successful? And we were both like, yeah, Jackie Tone. Like, that's. That's the kind of person you want. Want succeeding. And I would have thought the elevator person was a Jackie Tone. I really would have. So sometimes they trick you, man. Sometimes they trick you.

[Matt]

Just be nice. Everyone should be nice. It's free.

[Leah]

Yeah. Oh.

[Nikki Glaser]

I mean, I would argue that it costs something to be nice. It takes.

[Leah]

Yeah, it does. Effort. It takes extra effort.

[Nikki Glaser]

I would so much rather just, like, ignore everything, you know, and just be like, okay.

[Leah]

Oh, my God. It's so easy to be. It plenty.

[Nikki Glaser]

When you're in a good mood, it's easy to be nice, but when you're in a bad mood, it's just. Can't you. Can't I just keep going?

[Leah]

Yeah. People go, oh. Smiling takes this many muscles, and frowning takes four times as many. I'm like. But no one is, like, walking around.

[Nikki Glaser]

Like, yeah, I'm not frowning either.

[Leah]

Lily Rose Depp on the red carpet. It's like, doing nothing takes no muscles. That reference Lily Rose Depp is art. Lily Rose Depp, go look. Go Google. Lily Rose Rose Depp on red carpets. She makes this face every single time.

[Nikki Glaser]

Wow.

[Matt]

It's just.

[Leah]

She is. It's constant, and it's art. Because a second I've seen, like, some of the video of her posing on the red carpet. The second she's done posing, she goes into a smile and is like natural again. She is trying to look like cunty on the red carpet. And I, I used to judge it and be like, why is she making that face? And now I'm like, I love it. I love a choice that is like kind of antagonizing people who are supposed to just, you know, you're always supposed to be cheery and like so effervescent on the red carpet. Fucking cool. Cool move. I love it. All right, got to go. Thank you for listening this week. We'll be back next week. Don't you think? We won't. Sean O'Connor, Brian Frangie, thank you, Noah and thank you for listening so much. We'll be in Hartford, Connecticut this weekend. Portland, Maine, two shows. I'll see you then. Or maybe I'll. But we'll see you next week on the show. Don't be k byee. The Nikki Glaser Podcast is a production by Will Ferrell's Big Money Players and I Heart Podcast created and hosted by me, Nikki Glaser, co hosted by Brian Frangie, executive produced by Will Ferrell, Hans Soni and Noah Avior, edited and engineered by Lean and Loaf Video production Mark Canton and music by Anya Marina. You can now watch full episodes of the Nikki glaser podcast on YouTube, follow icky glazerpod and subscribe to our Chann channel. Get this, Adults with financial literacy skills have 82% more wealth than those who don't.

[Nikki Glaser]

From swimming lessons to piano classes, us parents invest in so many things to.

[Leah]

Enrich our kids lives. But are we investing in their future financial success? With Greenlight you can teach your kids financial literacy skills like earning, saving and investing. And this investment costs less than that. After school treat, start prioritizing their financial.

[Nikki Glaser]

Education and future today with a risk.

[Leah]

Free [e-mail] iheart greenlight.com iheart hey, it's.

[Matt]

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[Leah]

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[Nikki Glaser]

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[Leah]

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[Nikki Glaser]

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[Matt]

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[Nikki Glaser]

Visit Albertsons or Safeway.com for more details.

[Leah]

Details when it comes to your health and well being. The right care can change everything. That's why Cleveland Clinic has been elevating world class patient care for over a century. From the latest in heart, neurology and cancer care to advanced diagnostics and beyond, Cleveland Clinic is here for every care in the world. Explore a wide variety of health and wellness info by visiting clevelandclinic.org today with the best all inclusive Vacation Deals to Mexico and the Caribbean Booking your getaway with Cheap Caribbean Vacations means you have more freedom to do your deal deal. Whether you want to enjoy snorkeling, endless margaritas and more, or simply soak up the sun and sand in a tropical paradise, Cheap Caribbean Vacations has your deal for that. Plan and book the exact getaway you want at exactly the right price for you by using our exclusive budget Beach Finder. Or find a featured adults only all inclusive package to seekers, resorts and spas and do your [e-mail].