Episode 902: Thirty-nine Year BNI Member

Summary

The Official BNI Podcast: Episode 902 - Thirty-nine Year BNI Member

Released on March 19, 2025

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Introduction

In Episode 902 of The Official BNI Podcast, host Dr. Ivan Misner welcomes Stephen Marche, the world's longest-standing BNI member, celebrating an impressive 39-year tenure. This episode delves into Stephen's journey with BNI, his effective networking strategies, and the secrets to maintaining long-term relationships within the organization.

Guest Introduction and Background

[00:50] Dr. Ivan Misner:
"Stephen has been a BNI member for 39 years. He joined BNI when it was called the Network in June of 1986, where he learned many lessons about networking and helping clients secure real estate loans."

Stephen Marche, a dedicated professional in the real estate loan industry, shares his passion for assisting self-employed business owners and emphasizes his belief that "the only good loan is a closed loan." His commitment to BNI reflects his broader dedication to problem-solving and client satisfaction.

Longevity in BNI: Building Relationships

[02:39] Stephen Marche:
"Referrals. When someone would call me, especially Realtors, they would always talk about, 'I have to give two people referrals or three referrals.' And I said, that's not the way I do it. The way I refer somebody if I trust is I will make sure my good friend calls you, Ivan."

Stephen attributes his long-standing membership to fostering genuine trust and not merely exchanging business cards. By ensuring that referrals come from a place of trust, he has built strong, enduring relationships within BNI.

Effective Referral Strategies

Stephen shares practical examples of his referral approach, highlighting the importance of personal connections over quantity. He recounts how he encourages potential members to attend meetings and experience BNI firsthand, rather than relying on brochures or impersonal introductions.

[05:33] Stephen Marche:
"Another one very quickly is a Georgia gentleman who moved his CPA practice to Georgia. I told him, 'Just go to a chapter and do not leave until you get an application and join.'"

This method has proven effective, leading to rapid integration and leadership roles within new chapters, as seen with Stephen's referrals who became vice presidents within a year.

Building and Growing Chapters

[06:53] Dr. Ivan Misner:
"CPAs have been very, very successful in BNI, as have lone people, home loan people such as yourself."

Stephen emphasizes the diversity within BNI, sharing anecdotes about successful collaborations between different professions, such as CPAs and attorneys. These cross-professional relationships enhance the network's strength and reach.

The Importance of Consistency and Attendance

[08:32] Stephen Marche:
"You've got to be there. And people say to me, how many times have you missed? I said five. Two kids, one sickness, and two vacations. And they don't understand that you've got to show up."

Stephen underscores the critical role of consistent attendance in maintaining and growing one's network. His minimal absences over 39 years highlight the dedication required to sustain successful networking.

Substitutes and Maintaining Presence

Dr. Misner and Stephen discuss the role of substitutes in meetings, emphasizing that proper preparation is key to maintaining the quality and continuity of presentations.

[09:08] Dr. Ivan Misner:
"When you have a legitimate sub, that's fantastic. It sounds like you did it right by preparing your sub."

Stephen shares his positive experiences with substitutes, noting that well-prepared replacements can effectively represent a member's interests without compromising the meeting's integrity.

Personal Insights and Dedication

[10:21] Stephen Marche:
"My wife never really understood what networking was all about. I explained that you had said it was never taught in school, college... I'm the fixer when it comes to loans."

Stephen reflects on his personal motivations, revealing how his dedication to networking stems from a desire to solve problems and assist others. His role as a "fixer" exemplifies the proactive mindset that drives successful networking.

Conclusion

Dr. Misner wraps up the episode by celebrating Stephen's remarkable commitment to BNI.

[12:09] Dr. Ivan Misner:
"Steve, thank you so much for being a loyal member of this organization for 39 years. I'm really proud to have you as part of BNI."

Stephen's story serves as an inspiring testament to the power of long-term dedication, genuine relationships, and effective networking strategies within BNI. His insights offer valuable lessons for both new and seasoned members aiming to maximize their BNI experience.

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Key Takeaways:

• Quality Over Quantity: Building trust-based referrals leads to more meaningful and long-lasting relationships.
• Consistency is Crucial: Regular attendance and active participation are essential for sustained networking success.
• Effective Substitution: Properly preparing substitutes ensures continuity and maintains the integrity of meetings.
• Personal Commitment: Dedication to networking can transform professional relationships and lead to significant personal and organizational growth.

For more insights and to connect with Stephen Marche, visit his website at homeloans411.com.

Transcript

[Priscilla Rice]

Episode number 90239 year B and I member.

[Dr. Ivan Meisner]

You're listening to the official BI podcast with BNI founder and chief visionary officer Dr. Ivan Meisner. Stay tuned for networking and referral marketing tips from the man who's been called the father of modern networking, along with suggestions and insights into getting the most from your membership in the world's largest networking organization, bni.

[Priscilla Rice]

Hello everybody and welcome back to the official BNI Podcast. I'm Priscilla Rice and I'm coming to you from Live Oak Recording Studio in Berkeley, California. And I'm joined on the phone today by the founder and the Chief visionary officer of BNI, Dr. Ivan Meisner. Hello Ivan, how are you and where are you?

[Dr. Ivan Meisner]

I am doing great and I am at home in Austin, Texas this week and I'm really excited to have a guest on the podcast. He is the world's longest standing member of bni. His name is Stephen Marche and Stephen has been a BNI member for 39 years. Now. We have a couple of members whose companies have been in for 40 years but it was their parent and then they handed over to their, to one of their children. But Stephen himself has been a BNI member for 39 years. He joined BNI when it was called the Network many many eons in June of 1986 where he learned a lot of lessons, he has said, about networking and helping clients secure real estate loans, which is the industry he's in. Stephen is very detail oriented and he loves to get loans closed. His passion, he says, lies in assisting people, especially the self employed business owners. And he likes to say his only, the only good loan is a closed loan. Stephen, it's been a long time since we've talked and it's really great to hear your voice. Welcome to the BNI podcast.

[Stephen Marche]

Thank you, Ivan.

[Dr. Ivan Meisner]

I appreciate that you've got a great voice for radio. You should do a radio show, Steve.

[Stephen Marche]

I did and it was phenomenal when the rates were in the twos and threes. But.

[Dr. Ivan Meisner]

Listen, it's great to have you on the podcast and I gotta start by asking you. 39 years. I'm, I'm just so impressed with that. That is so incredible. How have you managed to be a member for so long? I know you were, you've transitioned from one chapter to another. But you know, talk about the long term relationships being in that long.

[Stephen Marche]

Well, you started me off. You stood there in that conference room, the Best Western 1986 and I was impressed and I said hey, you taught me and told me what you learned and why you opened a few chapters at that point. And I learned it all. One thing that I did learn, and it's been the best way to get a people in to the chapter and build it. But here's one that maybe you'll share with everybody. Referrals. When someone would call me, and especially Realtors, they would always talk about, well, I have to give two people referrals or three referrals. And I said, that's not the way I do it. The way I refer somebody if I trust is I will make sure my good friend calls you Ivan. And it's up to them to call you and make that connection. And I've taught that throughout the chapters and been back to call. They've asked me to come in and speak many times in the different chapters, which I have. And another thing is about membership. I have always brought in members, and here's how I taught them. I tell the story about Copenhagen. We had a exchange student and she came a few times back to California from Sweden. And she says, my dad would like to talk to you. I said, call me. He says, you leave here every Wednesday morning very, very early, before I get up. And your family wondered where you went. I says, to network. Oh, okay. My dad liked to know. So I called him up and he told me his name was Michael. And I said. He said, well, what do you do and how do you do it? And I explained. I says, but you need to go to one. He says, well, I checked it before I called you and it's three hours away. And I said, just a minute. I said, there's one 10 minutes. But here's what you do. You go, don't leave until you get an application and join. Do you know that he called me the next day and told me that he wouldn't leave? And they couldn't believe it. And he joined six months later. A year later, he became vice president. Another story. Real quick.

[Dr. Ivan Meisner]

Let me just comment on that, Steve. You know, the idea of going to a meeting is so important. And you know, when I was starting BNI in 85, 86, when. And I, you know, I did the kickoff that you were at, and very few people can say that I was there and did the kickoff when they, when they started. But one of the things that I would tell people is you got to come to. You got to come to a meeting. They'd ask, back in 86, we had no material, so they'd ask for brochures or whatnot. I didn't have anything. There was no Internet. And I said, just, you got to. You got to come. You got to come to a meeting and experience it. Bring plenty of business cards. And. And so that is the key is going to a B and I meeting to see it firsthand.

[Stephen Marche]

Well, another one very quickly is Georgia gentleman, lived in Chicago, Minnesota, and he moved his CPA practice for whatever reason to Georgia. A distant cousin. And he asked me, what do I do? And he knows that every Wednesday I had a meeting and I said, find a chapter in Atlanta, Georgia and just go. He said, what do you mean? Call him up and tell him you'd like to be a guest. And I said, do not leave until you get an application and join the chapter. Well, within six months he became treasurer, and I believe he's still treasurer after all these years. Best CPA in that area. And he loves. Simple as that.

[Dr. Ivan Meisner]

And he's a. Did you say he's a cpa?

[Stephen Marche]

Cpa, yes.

[Dr. Ivan Meisner]

Yeah. So the one organization that. The one company that is still a member after 40 years is a CPA organization, Denny & Company. And they were my CPA back in 1985 and the company is still, they're still members today. And it's Carolyn's son, Matt Denny, who is the member. So CPAs have been very, very successful in BNI, as have lone people, home loan people such as yourself.

[Stephen Marche]

Oh, absolutely. Attorneys in. We were at Baker Square on Teal Boulevard. You. You were there. And sure enough, we had four different attorneys. I never saw so many pink slips being transferred between them and us. The four attorneys would refer back and forth and for two or three years there were four different type of attorneys in our group.

[Dr. Ivan Meisner]

Yeah. So for those of you who are wondering what a pink slip is, because we do most, most everything on B and I connect now, those are the referral slips that we used to have. Chapters still use them and actually hand out the. The slip, which I think has some power to it, handing it out like that. So that's what Steve is referring to. I'm going to do a podcast coming up soon, Steve, where there's a chapter that has over 10 attorneys in the group, which blows my mind. But it shows how you can actually be supportive of different classifications versus competitive with them.

[Stephen Marche]

That's true. We have one in our group. He's given me a grant for a three million dollar loan and we were able to get him an approval in a matter of three days. But he does the conventional. Sure.

[Dr. Ivan Meisner]

Yeah. Excellent. So any recommendations for people? For all the people out there that have not been a member for 39 years. What's your words of wisdom for people to understand that networking is more and the BNI is more of a marathon than a sprint?

[Stephen Marche]

Well, you've got to be there. And people say to me, how many times have you missed? I said five. Two kids, one sickness and two vacations. And they don't understand that you've got to show up.

[Dr. Ivan Meisner]

You do. But have you had subs representing you beyond those five or no?

[Stephen Marche]

Yes, I have. I. During the years when we were at the Wolskarables golf course, I had Mark Bacharach, entertainer and a magician come and entertain versus me speaking because I was.

[Dr. Ivan Meisner]

And having a legitimate sub is totally acceptable and that's fantastic. So you've missed five meetings without a sub in 39 years. That's so you hold two records in the organization, Steve. I think that's incredible.

[Stephen Marche]

Well, I did have recently, I think in the last year or so I did have a sub, this guy Pete sub for me and they said he did a great job. Of course I fed the information.

[Dr. Ivan Meisner]

Well, you know, that's the key on a sub. And I've got some podcasts where I talked about regretting creating the substitute program which was approved by the board of advisors. But we also found that the substitute program, when done right, is effective. And so you just said you prepared your sub and that's when it's done right. It's when you just hand over and say, hey, fill in for me. And you don't give them any information that it's that it's done wrong. Or when you have these professional subs, all they do is sub in a chapter. That's when it's done wrong. But it sounds like you did it.

[Stephen Marche]

Right as a verbal statement and, and it seems to work very well.

[Dr. Ivan Meisner]

Yeah. Well, Steve, any closing thoughts before we wrap up here today?

[Stephen Marche]

Well, my wife never really understood what networking was all about. I explained that you had said it was never taught in school, college, you were told never to talk to strangers, not to share things. And I get up and share things every day I learn something every day I teach my kids. It's always learning something every single day to make us better. And my wife always asks me, steve, why are you so dedicated? You get up and you solve problems for self employed people that are turned down. You know, people don't understand, why would I be turned down? Banks they've been with for 25, 30 years, they come to me and I figure it out, I solve problems. I have a sign that my daughter gave me for the holiday and my birthday. Dad fixes things. I'm the fixer when it comes to loans.

[Dr. Ivan Meisner]

I love it.

[Stephen Marche]

Private loans, estate loans, blanket loans, swing loans, bridge loans, commercial loans, residential. Hey, look, if you've got a simple guy that has a restaurant, he's been turned down by three of his major banks, runs millions of dollars through. They turn him down. He came to me. He wants to open up another restaurant two miles down the street. We got him alone in a matter.

[Dr. Ivan Meisner]

Of a week when what you're talking about here, Steve, that I think it can apply to everyone, is that BNI members really tend to, from what I've seen, knock themselves out to take great care of the referrals that they get. And clearly you do that or you wouldn't have been in for 40 for 39 years. Now, listen, we're out of time. For anyone that's interested, you can see Steve's website at homeloans411.com that's home loans, the number411.com. Steve, thank you so much for being a loyal member of this organization for 39 years. I'm really proud to have you as part of BNI.

[Stephen Marche]

Well, it's been 39 years since we first talked and we've talked many times thereafter.

[Dr. Ivan Meisner]

We have, and I hope to talk again more. Thanks a lot, my friend. Priscilla, over to you.

[Priscilla Rice]

Okay, great. Thank you so much. That was some wonderful information. This podcast is sponsored by MeisnerAudioProGrams.com and these audio programs will provide you with the tools and the inspiration to powerfully enhance your BNI experience. So check out the great material that's available to [e-mail] and then you can use the promo code IVAN5O for 50% off of everything. All of the proceeds go to the B and I Foundation. Thank you so much for listening. This is Priscilla Rice, and we look forward to having you join us again next week for another exciting episode of the official BI podcast.