689: The Pete and Sebastian Show - EP 689 - BEST OF 2025 - PT. 03

Summary

The Pete & Sebastian Show – Episode 689: BEST OF 2025 – PT. 03

Date: January 13, 2026
Hosts: Pete Correale & Sebastian Maniscalco
Podcast: Studio71

---

Episode Overview

In this “Best Of 2025, Pt. 03” episode, comedians Pete Correale and Sebastian Maniscalco wrap up their look back at the year's most hilarious and memorable show moments, highlighting the quirks of everyday life, family sagas, social etiquette, and the subtle absurdities of modern living. The episode offers classic comedic banter, observational stories, and a few recurring theme callbacks for both longtime fans and new listeners catching up on what the Pete & Sebastian Show is all about.

---

Key Discussion Points & Highlights

1. The Anatomy of a “Best Of” Episode

• [00:33 – 02:16]
  Sebastian and Pete explain the decision behind releasing a “Best Of” series, acknowledging a spike in new listeners and wanting to get everyone up to speed on the show’s trademark humor.

  “After 13 years, it’s getting hot, it’s on fire, and everybody's coming on. Play catch up.” – Pete (00:52)

2. The JJ Watt Glasses Mix-Up & Rumors of Death

• [02:17 – 04:16]
  Pete recalls a mix-up from the past year about NFL star JJ Watt’s new look: thinking his glasses were his "new thing", but they were for a CBS promo. This launches into a story about Pete and Sebastian both mistakenly believing a fellow comedian had passed away, highlighting the comedic responsibility of “getting the facts straight”.

  “You're busting my balls about Watt’s glasses … Meanwhile, you're sending condolence death certificate for guys that are still alive.” – Pete (04:03)

  “Irresponsible text, more than any other text you could possibly send, as far as I’m concerned.” – Sebastian (04:19)

3. Quirks of Homeownership: Squeegees, Toilets, and Cat Doors

• [05:43 – 09:48]
  Pete and Sebastian debate the ethics and economics of deep-cleaning a new home—getting rid of items from previous owners (leftover squeegees, cat doors, old toilets), and the extremes some new homeowners take.

  “Some people even say … they take the toilets out and get brand new toilets … they don’t want to be sitting on used toilets from another homeowner.” – Pete (06:28)

• Sebastian discusses his disgust at inherited fixtures, particularly a kitchen door with a cat flap.

  “The door would be in the garage or in the garbage and I’d be sleeping … That should just be an open space right now.” – Pete (09:35)

4. Shark Attack Preparedness at the Beach

• [10:26 – 13:49]
  They riff on over-the-top beach warning signs—emergency phones, severe bleeding kits, and shark activity graphs—critiquing the logic and the city meetings that led to these safety installations.

  “Like, how do you not know? This is the problem with you sometimes; you don’t take it in … you gotta go beneath and start looking at what they’re providing you, man.” – Pete (11:17)

5. Embarrassing Grammar with Rocky

• [14:22 – 16:58]
  ‘Rocky’ (in character) hosts a recurring “embarrassing grammar” segment poking fun at Pete’s and Sebastian’s malapropisms:

  • “Vinmo” instead of Venmo
  • “Relative” vs. “Relevant”
  • “Ivy League” confusion
  • Eva Longoria mispronounced
  • “Wikipedia” booking confusion

  “He has been in a fight with this word his whole life. Keep punching, pd.” – Rocky (15:24)

6. Sleep, Routine, and Adult Bedtimes

• [18:29 – 23:33]
  Pete shares how cutting off phone use after 7pm (“no blue light”), quitting alcohol, and getting to bed by 9pm has transformed his sleep and health—baffling Sebastian.

  “Nothing is that pressing after 7pm at night, where you need to reference your phone for anything.” – Pete (19:18)

  “You go to bed at the same time as the kids. The whole family’s going down at the same time.” – Sebastian (22:26)

7. Tipping Etiquette & Social Situations

• [23:45 – 28:08]
  A classic tip debate: how hard do you press when someone refuses a tip? Pete offers his philosophy on presentation and intention, with Sebastian poking fun at the dramatics.

  “If you want someone to have a tip, they need to take this tip … I am coming back to the car with less money than I had before.” – Pete (25:09)

8. Baseball Manager Visits, Theatrics, and Casting

• [28:20 – 32:21]
  Pete questions the purpose of baseball managers' mound visits. Sebastian suggests it’s mostly a stalling tactic. The discussion veers into which famous managers Pete could play in a biopic—with much laughter about prosthetic bellies and Italian heritage.

  “You could morph into Tommy Lasorda better than you could Tony La Russa. And he’s famous and he’s Italian with the belly, bro, that could be your Oscar.” – Sebastian (31:50)

9. Vatican City Observations & Comedic Aspirations

• [32:21 – 34:36]
  Awestruck by the daily life inside Vatican City, Pete and Sebastian dream up a comedy special there (“Live from the Vatican”) and half-seriously imagine befriending the Pope.

  “There are people lacing up their sneakers, putting on their headphones, and jogging the streets of the Vatican.” – Sebastian (33:56)

10. Airplane Etiquette: Bare Feet, Noise, and Public Decorum

• [35:11 – 39:57]
  Pete rants about travelers with no self-awareness: clanging silverware, bare feet on seats, and blow-drying wet hair in the cabin.

  “What are you doing on the plate that there's this many dings?” – Pete (36:14)

  “You’re not coming through … you’re not cutting through the hallway to get back to your bedroom, Cindy.” – Sebastian (39:11)

11. Halloween, Kids, & Costume Commentary

• [39:57 – 45:01]
  Discussing how trick-or-treating became less personal and more awkward, with kids barely making eye contact and the dangers of any complimenting ("I like your ears"). They reflect on teenage exuberance, odd costumes, and boundary-pushing “interaction.”

  “When I was 13, I wouldn’t ask a grown man if he liked a Snickers bar.” – Sebastian (44:15)

12. Meeting Counting Crows & Neighbor Drama

• [45:14 – 49:17]
  Pete schemes ways to meet Counting Crows’ Adam Duritz, but his plan is thwarted after a spat with his neighbor over yard waste.

  “I finished my yard. I’m exhausted … I’m just gonna blow [the leaves] up under her bushes … She yells at me … I go, you never nice. You’re never nice.” – Pete (46:47)

13. Parenting, Bee Stings, and Building Grit

• [49:30 – 52:09]
  Pete beams with pride at his son playing through a bee sting at baseball practice—contrasting "old school" toughness with today’s softer, more “woke” parenting.

  “Anybody else on that team would have got a bee sting, they would have been out on a stretcher.” – Pete (51:38)

14. Gas Station Lotto Observational Comedy

• [52:54 – 56:19]
  A dry, pained bit about the sadness of gas station culture, buying lottery tickets, and the impossible odds of repeated big wins. Bonus: Pete attempts to cheer up the clerk, with deadpan results.

  “Are you gonna be a ray of sunshine in the Shell gas station? … Let me step outside the castle and walk amongst the people.” – Sebastian (55:12)

15. Social Decay: Dancing, Parenting, and Discipline

• [58:43 – 61:54]
  The chain reaction of bad parenting and social breakdown, riffing on viral videos and discipline gone soft in America.

  “That kid's parents failed in parenting, and now it’s society’s problem.” – Pete (59:20)

  “You need a license to fish, but anybody could have a kid.” – Quoting comic Rich Voss (59:48)

16. Family Rituals: “Ten Questions” Game & The Importance of Nighttime Routine

• [65:59 – 68:47]
  Pete details his bedtime ritual for connecting with his kids, using trivia questions and real talks about their days.

  “If you need to tell me anything, you’ll – you’ll never get in trouble, anything going on in your life?” – Pete (68:11)

17. Life, Aging, and Vanity in the Social Media Era

• [63:15 – 65:59]
  Both joke about making viral videos, body image, and the weirdness of modern fame—videos garnering more views than movies.

  “Apparently more people see the dancing videos than they saw the movie about my father. That’s where we’re at in entertainment right now.” – Pete (63:44)

---

Notable Quotes & Moments

• Pete (04:03): “You’re busting my balls about Watts glasses … Meanwhile, you’re sending condolence death certificate for guys that are still alive.”
• Sebastian (04:19): “Irresponsible text, more than any other text you could possibly send.”
• Sebastian (22:26): “You go to bed at the same time as the kids. The whole family’s going down at the same time.”
• Pete (25:09): “I am coming back to the car with less money than I had before [to tip].”
• Sebastian (31:50): “That could be your Oscar … he’s Italian with the belly, bro.”
• Sebastian (33:56): “There are people lacing up their sneakers, putting on their headphones, and jogging the streets of the Vatican.”
• Sebastian (39:11): “You’re not coming through … you’re not cutting through the hallway to get back to your bedroom, Cindy.”
• Sebastian (59:48): “You need a license to fish, but anyone can have a kid.”

---

Timestamps for Key Segments

• 00:33 – 02:16: Intro & “Best Of” rationale
• 02:17 – 04:16: JJ Watt glasses and “false death” text stories
• 05:43 – 09:48: Deep cleaning and moving into new houses
• 10:26 – 13:49: Shark attack preparedness at the beach
• 14:22 – 16:58: Rocky’s “Embarrassing Grammar”
• 18:29 – 23:33: Pete’s phone, sleep, and bedtime routine
• 23:45 – 28:08: Tipping etiquette and philosophy
• 28:20 – 32:21: Baseball mound visits and movie casting
• 32:21 – 34:36: Observations about Vatican City
• 35:11 – 39:57: Airplane/misbehavior etiquette
• 39:57 – 45:01: Halloween, trick-or-treat, and generational changes
• 45:14 – 49:17: Counting Crows story and neighbor trouble
• 49:30 – 52:09: Parenting, grit, and bee stings
• 52:54 – 56:19: Gas station lotto-buyer culture
• 58:43 – 61:54: Parenting, discipline, and social decline
• 65:59 – 68:47: Bedtime rituals and “ten questions” game
• 63:15 – 65:59: Social media, dancing videos, and fame

---

Episode Tone & Final Thoughts

The episode showcases the hosts’ signature blend of storytelling, observational humor, and candid conversation. The humor is punchy, observational, and at times laced with a nostalgic yearning for past social norms, set against relatable slices of middle-aged life. Pete and Sebastian keep the banter sharp, riffs running, and, even in recapping, the show feels spontaneous and engaging for both new and longtime listeners.

---

End of Summary

Transcript

[Pete Corieli]

Disney wants to know, are you ready?

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

Yes.

[Pete Corieli]

For Marvel Studios Thunderbolts, the New Avengers, now streaming on Disney.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

Let's do this.

[Pete Corieli]

One of the best Marvel movies of all time is now streaming on Disney.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

Hey, you weren't listening to me.

[Pete Corieli]

I said Thunderbolts the New Avengers is now streaming on Disney.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

Meet the New Avengers.

[Pete Corieli]

That's cool, man. Marvel Studios Thunderbolts, the New Avengers, rated PG 13, now streaming on. You guessed it, Disney.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

This is the Pete and Sebastian show with Pete Corieli and Sebastian Maniscalco. What's going on, everybody? Welcome back to the Pete and Sebastian Show. This is the last of the best of 2025. I'm gonna fire this puppy up. Another great show we got coming right now. All the best moments from the last, I don't know, three or four months of 2025. All the fun, all the laughter. We're gonna play some of those clips for you now, and then that'll be the end of the best of. It was important that we did this, folks. We have a lot more new listeners this show. I don't know why, after 13 years, it's getting hot, it's on fire, and everybody's coming on. Play catch up. So we all thought it would be a good idea to put up some best ofs and get it out there and let people see what's been going on and what to expect in 2025. And just again, a little nugget that we're going to get into, because again, the next show we do is going to be us live, me and Sebastian, and we're right back on our saddles. Right back in it. So much to get into. And one thing I really can't wait to get into. I'll just give a little teaser here. Even though this is what the show is about, but this is the best of. Do you guys remember? And this might even be in the best of cans. You're behind the glass. Let me know if this is ringing a bell. Is this in the best of the episode where I thought J.J. watt had a new look with his glasses. I said, he's going with. Did that make the best of.

[Pete Corieli]

He will.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

All right, so there's an episode where Watson these glasses and I thought it was his new look. And then he comes on the cast and I was wrong. Turns out they were a promo for cbs. But you'll. You'll hear that on the best of. But I took a lot of heat for coming on the show with false facts and false information because we try to be factual, man. We're better than CNN and FOX combined over here, right? So then what do I get? Two days ago, I get a text from Sebastian. I don't even want to say the comics name because I still don't know where we've landed with this guy. Sebastian sends me a text that this comedian died. Comedian I didn't know personally, I don't even think I ever heard of him. And I'm sure he's fantastic comedian. I just hadn't heard of him. So I go, hey, I didn't hear the guy, but it's sad to hear. I text back whenever a comedian goes, if he was a friend of yours, I'm very sorry to hear that. So then I get a text, and I had to simultaneously got a text from Tammy Pascatelli, the comedian, also saying this particular comedian was dead. Then I get a text from Tammy about, I don't know, 30 minutes after that, saying, oh, it was a mistake. It was some sort of. Well, you know how comics are. Turns out he's still alive. So then I text Sebastian. I go, guy, what the fuck is going on? You're sending me a text that this guy is dead. Now, I got this from Pascatelli, and I cut and pasted to him saying that he's alive. What the fuck is going on here, guy? Is this guy with us or is he with God?

[Pete Corieli]

Let me know.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

Sebastian tries to FaceTime me, which I. I try to tell him I don't FaceTime at night when I have my Walmart glasses on. Okay? That's like, you don't. You don't FaceTime Superman when he's not in the cape. Okay, I don't. I don't do that. So then he leaves a text this morning, I guess, because he still can't figure it out. And his text is, is this guy effing dead or alive? So then I said to him in a text, this is my point, Sebastian. You're busting my balls about Watts glasses and whether I'm right, I'm wrong. Meanwhile, you're sending condolence death certificate for guys that are still alive.

[Pete Corieli]

And I'm.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

I mean, I sent the condolence and the guy's still alive. So let's get the facts. So anyway, we'll be getting into that, you know. You know, have you ever sent a text saying somebody was dead and then it turns out they're not dead? That is an irresponsible text, more than any other text you could possibly send, as far as I'm concerned. So of course we'll get into that and so much more nuances. That's the. That's the beauty of the Pete and Sebastian show. We dissect every little. We did FaceTime the other day. Me and Jackie did FaceTime with Sebastian. He wanted to talk about something, and we were in our bedroom and Jackie goes, if you don't answer, he's not going to keep calling you. I mean, what kind of friend do you. You say you're a friend. I'm like, all right. So I answer in my bedroom with my glasses on. And then two days later, Sebastian texts me and he goes, I gotta ask. This has been bothering me for two days. Do you guys not have a headboard at the end of your bed? Oh, my God. I can't. I can't even with this guy. I can't even with this guy. It's all he does. He just looks in the background to see what you got going on. Anyway, we'll dissect that, too, and so much more. Enjoy this best stuff. I've already said too much. Sit back and enjoy as much as we enjoyed making it. And let's have a fun 26. I don't see why we wouldn't. I really don't see why we wouldn't. All right, man. Pete and Sebastian show. We love you for listening.

[Pete Corieli]

I took a shower at my dad's house and there's a squeegee in there. And he told me, after you're done, you know, wipe down the shower. And. And the. The bit goes, I ain't working after. I just cleaned myself.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

Right.

[Pete Corieli]

So what is this with the squeegee? And now all of a sudden you're sweating, cleaning the.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

Get the fuck out of there.

[Pete Corieli]

Let the.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

I'm doing an air dry. By the time I'm done, my body air dried and. But the floor is so swampy and wet for me, pushing all the water down through it. It's disgusting. Absolutely. Now.

[Pete Corieli]

And by the way, when you moved in. I'm sorry, I'm sorry, but why in the hell.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

Yeah.

[Pete Corieli]

Is there a squeegee left over? Like, that house should have been wiped clean. Like, there's a murder that happened in that house. Everything from that previous owner out the door. Some people even say. And they do this. And I know this is an economic thing. If they ever buy a house and they move in, they take the toilets out and they get brand new toilets in the whole house. They don't want to be sitting on used toilets from another homeowner. What you take? We didn't do this. But Some people do this, right?

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

Well, we haven't yet. We have one that's a heated one we're going to try and put in. But now that you said it, I didn't even think of it. I'm disgusted. What am I doing? But again, yours is Blake Shel. Blake Shelton lived there for a spell. I'm not saying anything that the tabloids don't know. So, you know, if I was, you know, that's a little different.

[Pete Corieli]

I'd be.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

He'd be my muse. Knowing Blake was on that thing.

[Pete Corieli]

Maybe I don't go to Blake.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

God's country on that bowl. What?

[Pete Corieli]

I go on Stefani's toilet.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

Oh, no, bro, that's what. Listen, go on Blake's toilet, man. That's much more. I'm think I like his lyrics better. Yeah, that's so fucking funny, bro. Should we be changing them? And let me ask you this. Is there a special cleaning job done differently for a new owner of a shower as opposed to just, you know, like you get out and someone cleans your shower for you? Forget that. I want it cleaned. I don't even want to. The CIA can't even find DNA of anyone else in the shower but me and my family. Right.

[Pete Corieli]

Again, this is economics. But when you buy a home, you have a professional cleaning crew sweep the house. And they come in, there's about. We had this done. It was like 10 of them. They come in and I gotta get the name. It's like Karen's Cleaning or something. I've never seen this type of cleaning before. It is so thorough and deep that you would think the shit was just installed. Wow. They got it down to a science. So I like a whole deep cleaning done where like your point? No DNA. No, no. If they had a cat, there's not a remnants of dander in the home.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

Yeah.

[Pete Corieli]

I love it.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

I love it, bro, this is going to make you fucking physically ill. But the door we have in our kitchen, that goes down to the basement, fine. It's nice, it's not beat up. The whole house is in fine shape. We have a new one that Jackie picked out in transit in route delivery. But the door, they have bottom corner of it, little cat door. So the cat could get down to the basement and shit and piss whenever it wants. It had a cat.

[Pete Corieli]

I would be sleeping without that door. The door would be in the garage or in the garbage and I'd be sleeping or. That should just be an open space right now.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

You're right, you're right. Because even the dog Sometimes has been sniffing it, but that looked like. What the fuck? Was this useful? It's disgusting. Gross.

[Pete Corieli]

All right, so, bro, who's got the.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

Time to make a door for their pet? The pet. You don't go out till I get home. I don't give a. What the. That's insane. You. You got way too much time. We're coming in with a little saw, like a little dawn. Sorry, man. These people with their pets. You can die of starvation down there for all I care.

[Pete Corieli]

When you see a sign, for those of you who are listening, it says, severe bleeding first aid. And there is a box that they give you if somebody is severely bleeding. Now, there was a meeting that the park district or the city had to have for this to happen. Like, they're going, listen, these sharks are. It's getting out of hand. Is there something we could do? And then one guy said, you know what? We could put a severe bleeding first aid kit there Just. Just so they have it when it happens. All right, now.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

Yeah. Oh, my God. At first, I. Bro, I don't think I saw that when I was there. I saw the sign, but I didn't notice the orange box. What? I got tourniquets in there.

[Pete Corieli]

That's what I'm saying. Like, how do you not know? This is the problem with you. Sometimes you don't take it in. Take it in, man. You saw the shark, and that was it. You got to go beneath and start looking at what they're providing you, man.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

You would have been a great detective, dude. Even the way you saw the face on the video. You catch everything.

[Pete Corieli]

Oh, move over and then go to the other side. 911 emergency phone. So here's another meeting. Did they put the phone in for the sharks or was the phone in the food court? And they said, you know what? Make a sign that tells them that there's a phone in the food court if they need. There's so many things telling you, just don't bother.

[Patrick]

Don't bother.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

Yeah, I think that sign. I think the food court phone line is shark bite only. Like, when that rings, they know somebody got bit. It's like the bath phone, but it's the shock phone. I swear to God. Look at that shit. I mean, that's killing business. Look at that.

[Pete Corieli]

That whole thing, that whole setup there. And then I like how they just put in the. No bikes on the beach. Like it has nothing to do. Everything's 91 1. Kill believe. Then all of a sudden, no bikes on beach. Memorial Day. No bikes. Fuck that we're not even bringing our.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

Towels, let alone a bike. People are going to be running out of the water, bleeding to death, and we don't want them tripping over Huffy bikes. O. So get him the hell out of there.

[Pete Corieli]

Another thing they put on this damn sign is the graph. Now, they did a peak activity graph to tell you. Listen, I don't know what month is the highest there? It looks like it's October. September. October.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

Okay, October.

[Pete Corieli]

You don't even want to be near this beach. When were you there? What month?

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

We were there in August. They go, so the water's still a little on the warmer side, right? So I think they like it colder. And that's when.

[Pete Corieli]

So is the third worst month for shark attacks there.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

Oh, geez.

[Pete Corieli]

Yeah, so I don't even know what anybody's even going to this speech. The next step is them to build a brick wall there, right there by the entrance and say closed. Right there. Gonna build a wall and go closed. Too many killings. Goodbye.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

Hey, yo, what are you doing? What's happening, man?

[Rocky]

Happy New Year to all you people out there. It's me, Rocky. Welcome to Embarrassing Grammar, where we learn how not to use and pronounce certain words. This is Pete Corieli, hilarious comedian, but he's pretty punchy if you ask me. As my friend Mickey would say. What are we waiting for?

[Advertisement Voice 1]

Take this.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

How come Venmo and paypal is always done later if you were gonna give me the cash right now. Just Vinmo me right now. Look, I'm Vinmo.

[Rocky]

Who is this guy? Vin? I think Vinmo is cousins with Spider Ric.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

It's valuing your little self respect for yourself, I guess. You know, I mean, everything is relevant.

[Rocky]

Pete is trying to say relative, but I guess it's also relevant that you have, like, a relaxed brain.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

Did you even see Memoirs of a Geisha?

[Pete Corieli]

A geisha?

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

Have you ever been around a geisha? Geisha. Geisha.

[Pete Corieli]

Yeah.

[Rocky]

He has been in a fight with this word his whole life. Keep punching, pd.

[Pete Corieli]

Why they call it Ivy League?

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

Why do they, bro? Ivory.

[Pete Corieli]

Oh, no. Iv.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

Iv. Is that another edit?

[Pete Corieli]

Wait, hold on. You wanted your kid to go to an Ivory League.

[Patrick]

Stay in school and use your brain.

[Pete Corieli]

See, be a thinker, not a sticker.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

Okay, Thanks a lot, champ. There are two kinds of love that.

[Pete Corieli]

You ought to know.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

This is the lovely Eva Longori. Okay? Jack Longoria. Okay.

[Rocky]

Before Adrian, Paulie set me up with my first woman with a similar name. She was pregnant.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

I feel like when you check into a hotel and once they see you use like Wikipedia or Orbits or you prepaid or whatever. Wikipedia, Expedia. Expedia. Who's getting old now, huh? Man, I gotta stop this. Fight's finished. I gotta call it. You can't do no more out there. I gotta stop this thing. The peace and sebastian show.

[Advertisement Voice 1]

Chronic migraine is 15 or more headache days a month each lasting four hours or more. Botox. Onobachulinum toxin A prevents headaches in adults with chronic migraine before they start. It's not for those with 14 or fewer headache days a month. It prevents on average eight to nine headache days a month versus six to seven for placebo.

[Advertisement Voice 2]

Prescription Botox is injected by your doctor. Effects of Botox may spread hours to weeks after injection causing serious symptoms. Alert your doctor right away as difficulty swallowing, speaking, breathing, eye problems or muscle weakness can be signs of a life threatening condition. Patients with these conditions before injection are at highest risk. Side effects may include allergic reactions, neck and injection site pain, fatigue and headache. Allergic reactions can include rash, welts, asthma symptoms and dizziness. Don't receive Botox if there's a skin infection. Tell your doctor your medical history, muscle or nerve conditions including als, Lou Gehrig's disease, Myasthenia gravis or Lambert Eaton syndrome and medications including botulinum toxins as these may increase the risk of serious side effects.

[Advertisement Voice 1]

Why wait? Ask your doctor. Visit botoxchronicmigraine.com or call 1-844botox to learn more.

[Advertisement Voice 2]

Shopping is hard, right? But I found a better way. Stitch fix online. Personal styling makes it easy. I just give my stylist my size, style and budget preferences. I order boxes when I want and how I want. No subscription required. And he sends just for me pieces plus outfit recommendations and styling tips. I keep what works and send back the rest. It's so easy. Make style easy. Get started [e-mail] Spotify. That's stitchfix.com Spotify.

[Pete Corieli]

You know, you hear about this blue light. You can't, you know, about an hour and a half before bed, you shut the phone off because the blue light affects your sleep. It tricks your eyes into thinking it's daylight, the whole thing. So that has really, really done wonders to my sleep pattern. Just putting it away.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

Can I ask a question?

[Pete Corieli]

Yeah, go ahead.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

It's unbelievable, but like, how are you handling moments? Like when something comes up after seven o', clock, hypothetically Teddy Roosevelt and you're like, wait, what number president was he? Like, what do you do right there? You just let it fade. You let it fade and go. I guess I won't know.

[Pete Corieli]

We wonder.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

Oh, wow, that's so 1970s, bro. I need an answer. I need an answer. That's great.

[Pete Corieli]

Nothing is that pressing after 7pm at night, where you need to reference your phone for anything. If it's, you know, they could wait till the morning. Nothing's happening. Business wise after seven o'.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

Clock. What made you do this? What made you finally do this? Did you see something? Did someone tell you? Or just in your head, you're like, I'm doing this.

[Pete Corieli]

One of these things that popped into my head. You know what? Let me just get rid of the phone after 7 o' clock because I wanted to. It originated because of the sleep. Because I keep hearing about looking at the phone before you go to sleep disrupt your sleep. So that's what started it. And then the byproduct of it was, oh, wow. I'm more present with my family, whether it be me and Caruso throwing the football or whatever. I mean, sometimes you pick up the phone to do a video of your son throwing the football. I mean, that's. Forget it. It's just, it's now. It's just a memory. It's just a memory now.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

Right, Right.

[Advertisement Voice 2]

So.

[Pete Corieli]

The sleep is. Oh, and no drinking. Two weeks, no alcohol.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

Here we go with the drinking. Here we go with that one again.

[Pete Corieli]

They like my fucking parents with this shit, you know, anything good, Anything I tell them good in my life, they on. Right. So I got him. I got a massage last night for what.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

You want for two. I love the sleep thing. I love how the 7 o' clock seems like a great time to do it. But every time you go a couple weeks without drinking, you act like you got your first chip. You just got to have a church basement. Great. You're not drinking for a couple of weeks. You're cleaning out the system.

[Pete Corieli]

You know, I mean, I'm just saying it's good for my sleep.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

Oh, for your sleep. Okay.

[Pete Corieli]

Yeah. So you drink at night, disrupts your sleep. And at this age, I need all the energy I could possibly get coming out of bed. Right, right. And it's sad to say, at this age, I. I got a bedtime. I'm like an infant.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

That's. That's, that's what you're gonna. Your body thrives on routine, bro. It thrives on that. You know? And I know when you go on the road, that's a different kind of routine you got to get into. But what, what time is it? Please tell Me, it's got a one and a one.

[Pete Corieli]

Oh, no. Oh, no. I'm in bed by 9 o'.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

Clock. 9 o'.

[Pete Corieli]

Clock.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

So do your kids lock up? What the fuck? I mean, this is unheard of to have two children in elementary school. And mom and dad are kissing them good night. Go. Don't forget to turn out the lights when you go to bed.

[Pete Corieli]

They tuck us in.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

Oh, God. I'm telling you, man, it's terrible.

[Pete Corieli]

It's terrible.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

Nine o', clock, you go to bed at the same time as the kids. The whole family's going down at the same time.

[Pete Corieli]

Basically they're in bed and then, you know, they get. And normally when a kid gets up out of bed, they go find their parents watching TV or whatever. No, they come in our room, pitch black, and they gotta like, daddy, could you put my air conditioning on? A little kinda hot in the room, man. Let me get out of bed. I don't know.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

I mean, I think you. I think even every child likes to think that the parents are up at least another half hour. Can you at least stay up till I'm asleep? I like to think that you're like on watch, like Nam, you know? Jesus. I mean, I need one thing and you're already sound asleep in the dark. Jesus, that's aggressive. Makes me think I was keeping you up, you know what I'm saying? So I bet you do. I hit this age too, where you come down into the kitchen and you announce to Lana what a good call it was that you guys went to bed at nine. Cause you feel great.

[Pete Corieli]

It's the little things at this age that really matter, you know. We're not celebrating much over here. I mean, we're celebrating getting to bed at a reasonable hour.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

Frank, the owner, went over and tipped the Caddy. And I was going to say goodbye to the Caddy right after Frank did. And I went over, I had 50 bucks and I said to you, you think 50 is good? And you go, yeah, tip 50. You said that a little earlier. If that's what you got, that's cool. So I went over and I. I did the old. Put it in his palm. And I said, thanks, Kev. Really had a blast. And he went like this. No, no, I can't, I can't. Frank already tipped me. I've been taken care of. I said, you sure, man? Come on. And he's like, no, no, I really can't. I really can't be. I had a great time here. I hope to see you again. I said, all right. Thank you, man. And then I go to get back in the car. And then Sebastian right away goes, well, what you said, you said, I don't feel that you tried to give him the tip enough. And I said, I tried to give it to him twice. And he even implied by saying if Frank gave it to him already, that if it would be rude of him to take it. And Frank was still within eye shot. All of it. Right. So I guess it begs the question for the listeners and for you, too, if you go to give someone money and they say, no, like, when do you stop trying to give them that money? I mean, he had an open palm. If I left it in, it would have dropped to the floor. Then. Then what? I pick it up and go, come on. No, serious, like, where does it end? How does it end?

[Pete Corieli]

It's an attitude towards tipping. It's not how you do it. It's the attitude you have coming in, not you. A person has coming into the tip now you give a tip, the person goes, no, I can't accept that. It's not, come on. It's not like a. Come on. No, take it. It's all in the presentation, what I found throughout my years of tipping. I give somebody a tip and I really want them to have the tip. They need to take this tip. I'm not going in and going, I hope you don't take it. I'm not going in with that attitude. I'm not saying. I'm not saying you're going in with that attitude, but you have to come in with, I am coming back to the car with less money than I had before.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

I like that.

[Pete Corieli]

So you say, you say, here you go. Nah, I can't take that. I said, listen to me. I would be greatly offended if you did not accept this tip. This is a gift to you. Thank you so much for all your hard work. You deserve it. Nine times out of 10, that person is going to be stunned. And there is no comeback to that. I can't take the tip. So it's not like a. It's not like, no, take it. No, I can't. Don't take it. No, I can't. Okay, It's. You deserve it. You were breaking your ass out there. And what I do is I reward people for hard work. God bless you. Back in the car.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

Listen, you're gonna give a monologue like that, you got to give the guy a hundred dollar bill. I'm gonna say all that shit and then go, here's 50. He's gonna go, give him a hundred dollars? 45. What am I made out of, guy? Come on. It's crazy. Yeah. There's a little something for you. I can't take it.

[Pete Corieli]

Come on.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

No, seriously, take it. I can't. Goodbye. I. Listen, I'm not going to sit here and do this dance. I'm trying to give you money. Not going to take. You did a great job. You're not Al Capone, guy. It's just. It's just, you know, I mean, okay, the whole tipping thing has gotten a little crazy as it is.

[Pete Corieli]

I don't think so. I mean, the tipping for like going to a bookstore and they got a guy collected tips for rigging you up for. For a couple of books. Yeah, that's not a tip. That's what.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

That's what I.

[Pete Corieli]

For a guy that just did nine holes that we're not even paying. We're not even paying a dime. This is like entertainment for us. We're not paying anything. Frank's picking it up, right?

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

So, Right.

[Pete Corieli]

For me, it's like. It's a hundred dollars for the entertainment that's going to go to you. Good.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

And here's another 50 to add to that. You don't want.

[Pete Corieli]

Okay.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

I mean, Frank probably already gave him enough for the down payment on a house as it is. Jesus.

[Pete Corieli]

I just don't understand a lot of things in baseball. For example, pitchers got rocked a couple. Couple home runs, and then the manager comes out to the mound, and then the catcher comes out to the mound and now there's a discussion, right? And no one knows what the hell they're talking about. But then he gives them the ball and then he gets out of the game and then they bring in somebody from the bullpen. Why do we got to do this talking bullshit at the mound? Why can't the manager just go call the guy in and the guy comes running out and the pitcher comes to the doctor. Like, why is there. Like, what are they saying? You're out of the game? Like, why do we gotta discuss that?

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

Is there, like, when the. When the manager's walking out to the mound in his head, is he. Like, I'm taking him out unless he's got a really good reason for me to keep him in.

[Pete Corieli]

Is that.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

Is that, like. Is that what you think is happening?

[Pete Corieli]

Does this happen in any other sports? If the quarterback is having a bad game, does he come to the sideline and the coach goes, listen, I was thinking about taking you out, but what do you think? And he goes, no, coach, I got. I got a couple Touchdowns in me. Just leave me in. No, the fucking guy goes, get the fuck out. Get in there.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

Right?

[Pete Corieli]

There's no. There's no, like, discussion. What you got? You don't got it today.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

Well, yes, but in reality, what's going on is they buy in time because they got the guy warming up their relief pitcher. So the. So when I'm walking out to you to take you out of the game, I already got my relief picture warming up, and I'm just coming out, killing time. You already know you're coming out, you know, and you'll do the obligatory come on. Like you said, keep me in. I got a few. Patrick, can you find Tommy Lasorda on the mound talking to his pitcher who didn't want to come out? I don't know if we ever played this on the cast. It's goddamn hilarious. I don't know, bro. This is. I don't even want to say this on the air, but I'm gonna. You with the right hair and makeup, this is who you should play in a movie. And you'll win a fucking Oscar. I'm not kidding. I'm not kidding. He can't get them left handers out for Christ.

[Pete Corieli]

Oh, mighty.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

Get jammed on a Feel good, Tommy. I don't give a. You feel good? There's four hits up there. They all hit the opposite way. I don't give a. Tony, you got a left hand here. I strike this. I don't give a doggy. Well, I may be wrong, but that's my goddamn job. I'll make hurting. I'll make the decisions here. I'll make the decisions here. Okay. He's a funny guy, man.

[Pete Corieli]

In my head, I thought it was. What the hell's the guy's name that used to be LaRussa? That's what I thought you were talking about. So La sword is a whole different ball.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

I thought, yeah, prosthetic little belly come out. What do you don't think you could play him?

[Pete Corieli]

I thought I didn't look wise. I think I could go with LaRue. Was it LaRussa now?

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

I'm serious. Can we get a Tony La Russa? Patrick, can we get a good big shot of Tony LaRussa's face and of Tommy Losors? I think you could morph into Tommy Losor better than you could Tony LaRusso. And he's famous and he's Italian with the belly, bro, that could be your Oscar. Foreign.

[Pete Corieli]

There you have it, coming straight from the Vatican. Yeah. I had no idea, bro, that it was this kind of like. I don't want to say Westernized, but it sounds like. I thought there was just people in robes walking around. It sounds like there's, you know, people going to get their dry cleaning and having a Starbucks in there. But.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

But also in the most stunning little like, bro, it bothers me that I'm gonna die someday and I'm never gonna have been able to just stroll the Vatican City with a glass of wine and just go wherever I want, wherever I want. What's that over there? What's over, bro? They're having dinner with bottles of wine inside those walls. What are we doing? What are you doing? This guy grew up down the block from you.

[Pete Corieli]

That's what I'm saying, bro. I was thinking if they got a theater in there. Next special, Live from the Vatican. I mean, it's just.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

Oh, my God, bro, that would be incredible. Can we get a Google on who's performed at the Vatican? Is that a thing like, bro, they.

[Pete Corieli]

Got a 6300 cedar in there, bro. We'll be in there within the next two years. I predict that we're going to be going to the Vatican.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

Listen, I got dibs on opening for you at the Vatican. Make it happen. That was really enlightening, man. That was really cool.

[Pete Corieli]

There you have it. Anything else you want to say in closing here at the Pete and Sebastian show?

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

Like I said, I was amazed. A lot more going on than I thought. There are people lacing up their sneakers, putting on their headphones, and jogging the streets of the Vatican. Oh, my God. That's gotta be.

[Pete Corieli]

I'm sorry. I'm really.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

You think. You think, like, anyone, you know, has, like, spent the night in that city?

[Pete Corieli]

No, not that I know of. But I'm sure if you start talking to people, maybe there's someone in our lives that has been in there. I just want to find out more about this Pope. I feel. The way she was talking that this guy might be at a nightclub in six months.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

I think I know where you were going. I liked where you were going. About, like, doing something with him in Chicago and then asking about a theater. I think considering what you do, you'll be doing the rest of your life. And what he does, he'll be doing the rest of his life. There's a really good opportunity here to build up a friendship. A friendship that ends with you being, like, 65, 66, at that age. And every morning on Christmas, the phone rings and you look at your kids and go, it's the Pope Christmas.

[Pete Corieli]

I had A problem on the plane. God, this is such a problem. I have. I was eating. Yeah, they give you silverware. It's like. They give you silverware on the airplane. You know, it's like here, they give you plastic because you're, you know, you're going to stab somebody over there. They're like, you know what? We know everybody on the plane is going to behave, so we're just going to give you the normal utensil.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

Because if you don't behave when we land, they're gonna murder you as you're getting off the plane. It works, bro. It works. You could give out real utensils. You know what I'm saying?

[Pete Corieli]

So I don't know what the hell was going on, but I hear, like, clanging, you know? Like, you ever hear, like, a knife hit the plate, you know?

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

Oh, yeah.

[Pete Corieli]

But this was hitting the plate a lot. Like, I was like a ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding, ding.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

I was like, what the fuck?

[Pete Corieli]

What are you doing on the plate that there's this many dings. It should be a cut. And maybe you put the knife down and it's going to ding the plate, and then you eat. But the ding, ding, ding, ding, ding. What are you doing? What the hell are you doing up there? I couldn't get it out of my head. It kept. It kept. It kept happening. And I'm going to send Patrick this video. This was. This was something that. I'm surprised this lady wasn't escorted off the plane. Oh, man. Yeah, give me a second, because this is. This is.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

You really do have that noise disease, though, man, because it's like. It's like you can't tell your brain to stop hearing that one thing that it hears when there's other noises going on. You just zone in on that.

[Pete Corieli]

No, I could not not hear it. Then I gotta tell you this.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

I can't believe you didn't shower. I'm blown away by that. I'm just really. I know what I am, bro.

[Pete Corieli]

I know what I am. I knew you were gonna say this.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

I'm disappointed.

[Pete Corieli]

I knew you were gonna say this. Oh, here it is. Here it is. I gotta get your take on this. I just sent it to you. So I get on the plane. This is another thing that's gotta stop. It was a couple, and they were like, one of these documenting everything. They must have a channel, like a travel channel that they started. Let me show you this. I'll just show you and then I'll explain it for the people who are not viewing this look at what I witnessed.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

Oh, bro.

[Patrick]

God.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

What is going through people's mind when they do that?

[Pete Corieli]

So what you just saw is a woman has her bare feet up against the desk. Whatever they give you, this is in first class. And this is the same woman who was dinging the plates. It was coming out of her cube. So it goes hand in hand, feet up, ding in the. You know, it all makes sense. You know, like when someone does something like this, subsequently everything after this is going to be in this vein. You know what I'm saying?

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

Right?

[Pete Corieli]

She took the shower. She took the shower. You know what I'm saying? It came back wet, you know, like with the hair, like at the. Like, you know, like blow dry the hair out in the bathroom. We don't need to see. I don't need to see what you look like coming out of the bathroom at home.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

You're still right in public, you know, Right? Yeah. Oh, yeah. It's like, first of all, we're not a family. You're not coming through. You're not cutting through the hallway to get back to your bedroom, Cindy. All right? It's like when you played in Atlantic City. There was a couple having a drink at the bar in their robes because they just get out of the spa. What is a private hotel? You're the only ones here. Are we all like, invisible to you? Don't you, bro, don't you just want to go up to that person and go, what?

[Pete Corieli]

What?

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

What is any of this? What is any of this? You're banging the thing. When you eat your feet up there. You're coming your wet hair. You're a zero. And we all think that.

[Pete Corieli]

You used to go up to a house and the guy used to open, a girl used to open the door, hey, my guy, what are you? And I'm a ghost. There used to be an exchange between trick or treater and homeowner. That used to be a little bit more personal. And now these kids are such shut ins. And they're on the phone so much. They just got that, you know, they don't even say trick or treat. They come, they hold the bag out, hey, what are you, a vampire? You know, and you just get, you know, you just get this. You just get like a. You know, no interaction, no nothing, right? And the kid just gets it. And then they look at you like you, you know, like, you know, that's all you gave me is one. You know, like. Because my parents, they gave me everything that I ever wanted. And now. And now you're just Gonna give me one. The entitlement and how spoiled these kids are. No wonder you don't want to open up the door. Who the hell wants to open up the door anymore?

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

There was one girl that had, like, elf ears, like, and that. Like. Anyway, they were pointy ears, right? So I'm doing it, and then I'm like, I like your ears. And she's like, thank you. And in my head, I'm like, oh, God. Was that some form of harassment? Like, now I'm afraid you're gonna go home and tell the parents, like, did you say something of my daughter's ears? I mean, they were fake ears. They were fake, but you got. It's just. It's too. It's too dangerous now. It's all too scary. Like, say the wrong thing, there's gonna be a problem. One kid came up.

[Pete Corieli]

He came up.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

He had to be like six two. He was tall. He's skinny. He was in a green jumpsuit all by himself. Happy Halloween. You have a really cute dog there. Oh, I could take 3o. Thank you. He walks away. He's like, holy shit, Jack. We're just having fun. I don't know what the hell was just on the front porch. His favorite day of the year.

[Pete Corieli]

I don't like the people that play the part of the costume. Just be in the fucking costume, all right? Don't come to that door as the Incredible Hulk and go, oh, nobody's. Nobody's believing this act. Just trick or treat. You're the Hulk.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

I don't know, man. I kind of like that. Just give me like. No.

[Pete Corieli]

Okay, so listen, there's another thing that I noticed on Halloween. There's like. I call it teenage energy.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

So we're.

[Pete Corieli]

We're walking and these teenagers now. It's a different human being, bro. I'm telling you. It's. It's different human being. I feel it coming from behind me. This like, I don't know, teenagers, Were they always this loud or am I getting old? It's a. It's a volume way, way higher than the event is calling for. You know what I'm saying? So guy comes and he's like, by the way, I don't like these blow up outfits. It's another thing that I see that, you know, like the dinosaur that's blown up or the. I ain't into that outfit at all, or guy that's. That's on a toilet seat, but it's like his legs are, you know, like the. The legs aren't his legs. And I'm not into the. These blow up things.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

No. Yeah, the little fan inside of him.

[Pete Corieli]

Yeah, I ain't into that. So this guy comes up, he was dressed as a, I don't know, a dinosaur. And he comes up, he's like, hey, like when did you ever feel comfortable as a teenager talking to an adult? I saw an adult, I'm like, hey, right. Guy comes up to me, he's like 13 years old, he's like, do you want us. Do you like Snicker bars? He's like, got a Snicker bar on my face. You want a Snicker bar Now I love Snickers, but what do you think I'm gonna do? Take it from you? And I'm gonna take. Was it some prank that I'm gonna take the Snicker bar and it's attached to a tree and a fucking branch hits me. I ain't doing the Snicker.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

Right, right. He shouldn't even. Well, he shouldn't even be talking to you like that. Yeah, I don't like, I don't like. You don't. I don't ask questions. When I was 13, I wouldn't ask a grown man if he liked to snick his ball.

[Pete Corieli]

Well, a grown man that's dressed up in a singlet. Oh yeah, it's coming off his head. And a fake mustache. You gotta go. You gotta go. This guy must be insane. This you looking at a 52 year old grown man dressed up as a wrestler. In my head, as a 13 year old, you gotta go. This, this guy's out of his mind. I ain't even going up to him. It's either he's out of his mind or he has absolutely no balls and his wife.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

The pete and sebastian show.

[Pete Corieli]

The evil of the foreigner.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

Did I tell you, Mina way that I'm going to see at my favorite theater where I saw Bonnie Raitt and then I saw that Sinatra guy, that impersonator that wasn't so good. Osama, big date when we go, me and Jack, this year alone, we're going alone and we're going to see my second favorite band other than Billy Joel. The Counting Crows are playing at the Chautauqua Amphitheater. Right. So we're going. Got my tickets already and stuff. Didn't rely on anything else now as I may have. I think I've told you this. My neighbor is the sound guy for the shows there. Even I don't know if you saw in the news that when Salman Rushdie got stabbed on stage, that was here and he was right there dealing with all that. So I'm on the phone with my booker the other day, and I was like, listen, I looked it up. I don't think you guys have the Counting Crows, but if you have any connections. I go, I'm going to also ask some of the roadies I've become friendly with on Sebastian's tour, But I am calling in all favors. I'm dying to meet Adam Durowitz. I'm trying to get backstage just to tell this guy how much his music means to me, right? And he goes, I'll try and make it happen. Does any neighbor do the sound over there? So I can't do that. Got in an argument with his wife the other day. That's dead. It's dead of all time, too. Right before I got the Crows tickets, too. God.

[Pete Corieli]

Could you. Could you shed some light on.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

Oh, yeah, yeah. I'm doing yard work, right?

[Pete Corieli]

I'm doing the yard, bro.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

I rake my leaves, then I rake their leaves after they blow over to mine. Big storm coming in today. I'm going to rake this again. Drives me nuts, right? So I finished my yard. I'm exhausted, and I'm blowing. There's a fence right between me and her house, right? And I thought there was no one even home. I mean, like, there's been no movement the whole day, right? So now that area, I'm like, this shit's just gonna blow on my side. I'm just gonna gun my blower and just blow it up under her bushes. It's hers anyway. And I'm like. I start hitting it, but right away, there's a big piece of paper, big packaging paper, like, big bunch. As I'm blowing, I just grab from under the bushes, and she's got a little porch area there. And not mean or anything. I just. As I'm blowing, I just drop it over there. I'm like, going like this, you know? Then I come down over here, and I'm blowing, and I put it on Purr where it's lighter. It's not making much noise for a sec because I got to move some. And I hear, pete, Pete. I look over now she's out on the porch, like, instantly. Haven't seen her all day. Put a little piece of paper out there. Is this yours? Did you about the paper, right? Haven't seen you all day. Now, is this yours? I'm busting my ass getting your leaves in mine. Is this yours? I go, no, it's yours. If you'd done a little yard work, you Would have seen it. It's under your bushes, right? Then I purring. And she goes, I was just trying to be nice. I go, there. You. Well, you're never nice. You're never nice. Because she's not. She yells at me. The last time I did, I. I got some leaves by her. She yelled at me. So. But I keep waiting. And I'm not disrespectful to this woman or anything. I just like, you're not nice to me. Don't act like you're.

[Pete Corieli]

Yeah, you're never nice.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

I'm not blowing her. I'm turning around, blowing away from her. I'm like, you're never nice. You've never been nice. But. But anyway, I'm waiting for, like, maybe a husband. Like, hey, what's going on with that? But it doesn't happen because I think he knows, like, I'm not really wrong.

[Advertisement Voice 1]

Like.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

Like, if you hear the story. If Jackie said, well, then I went out and I was like, is this yours? I'd be like, well, if it was on our property, Jack. And was he helping us out, Blowing it? Yeah. Well, then. Yeah. Well, why wouldn't he? Like. Like, I feel like. So we'll see. Tbd. But nevertheless.

[Pete Corieli]

That.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

That avenue is dead. To meet Adam Derwitz. If anything, I can't let him find out I am meeting him. He'll shut it down. So I'm coming home today.

[Pete Corieli]

Took my son yesterday to baseball practice, and I gotta tell you, I'm very proud of him. A bunch of the kids, while we're waiting for the coach to show up, were, like, loud, and they were jumping off the bleachers. My son went in his bag, pulled out a mitt, got the ball, and goes, dad, let's play some catch. So me and him are the only people playing baseball while the other kids are jumping off the bleachers and. And whatnot. So the practice starts. He dives for a ball, and he comes up, and I see he's got agony on his face. I could see something. Something's wrong. And he's. And he's squinting, and he's holding his leg. He's coming up to me. He's limping. What's up? And. And he's. He prides himself on being extremely tough. He goes, I don't know what happened. And I looked at his leg. I go, you got stung by a bee. Got a bee sting first time.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

Oh, wow.

[Pete Corieli]

He goes, I thought it was a thorn, Daddy. I pulled it out. He pulled the fucking stinger out, this kid. I Didn't even see that he did it. I go, he's itching it. He's like, man. I go, you're gonna be all right. I go, you. You wanna. You wanna scrap it today and go home or do you want to stick it out? He goes, I'm going back in now. He goes back in and he's, you know, doing pop ups. He's batting this, that, and the other thing. And I'm going, crusoe. All right, with the leg. He goes, it hurts a little bit, but I'm, you know, it's all right, daddy. Don't worry about it. Guy fought through a beast thing and finished up the practice. That's what you want to see in your kids.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

That's it.

[Pete Corieli]

And I've come to the point now where I'm, you know, like, I was a little hesitant to, like, start being honest with them and telling them how I feel, but now the floodgates are open. I go, anybody else on that team would have got a bee sting. They would have been out on a stretcher.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

I love it.

[Pete Corieli]

And then he starts naming specific kids that would be out on a stretcher, which I'm like, all right, now we're. Now we got a good back and forth. All right? He knows. He knows he's tough, and he knows who's weak. Nice.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

So. But that's. It's funny because we become so nice, like, woke.

[Pete Corieli]

Right.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

That I'm doing the opposite now. I'm saying negative things sometimes to let my daughter know it's all right to talk about people a little bit.

[Pete Corieli]

That's what I was trying to say here. Not everybody's good, right?

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

Yeah. I mean, not every house is nice. Not everybody's good. And. Yeah, exactly. I'm right there with you. And. And it's like they, you know, it's. It's so not like that in school. It's like everybody. It's too nice sometimes a little too nice.

[Pete Corieli]

I had to ask, where's the lottery? You know, like the. Because I don't know. It's over there.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

Oh, God.

[Pete Corieli]

They got like a. They got like a loser section for that.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

Like, this is. This is why they don't, like, when it gets high like that. Because. Oh. Because then all, you know, you people come in like, oh, where's the machine? Meanwhile, it's usually derelict over there with two nickels to rub together. Like, you ever walk by an otb? Oh, my. I wouldn't let anyone paint my house that I've ever seen in an otb. Jesus.

[Pete Corieli]

Oh, God, I'm sitting there, like, filling out the guy next to me like.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

He'S scratching for life. Life. Yeah. Did you pull that big wad out your son was talking about to pay for your $2 lot of ticket?

[Pete Corieli]

But the you hear while you're filling out your forms? Because I had an, like, I had an ear to the cash register. Like, people, what they come in for, right? It's really fascinating to, to listen to the people coming in. You know, you get the, like, yeah, could you put on over 50 on 2? And then you hear, yeah, you know, you could even just by the voice. And I had a two marble rat. You could almost by the voice before they even like, get into it, like, what they need, right?

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

You know, like, can I get a six pack?

[Pete Corieli]

He's drunk, right?

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

Oh, yeah, go ahead and get that dirty 20 out of your pocket because I know you don't got a credit card, right? You know, he's telling the paid cash before they even show it too. You know what I mean?

[Pete Corieli]

So I thought, you know, let me make some conversation because the guy's getting shout the whole 8 hour shift and did it at 4. Give me a marble, Red. Give me a, you know, two. Pick on this. That. So I'm like, you know what, Let me talk to the guy.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

You're gonna be a ray of sunshine in the Shell gas station. Are you gonna make his day, Mr. Mr. Sunoco? You're gonna cheer up Mr. Sunoco. Look at you. Oh, it's like, let me step outside the castle and walk amongst the people for an afternoon, see if I can put a smile on their faces.

[Pete Corieli]

Oh, I just say, like, so you.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

Want to cheer me up? Get me the out of here. You got a job for me?

[Pete Corieli]

But anyway, you ever, like, you know, yeah, let me open it up with this guy. And then as soon as I opened it up, I'm like, oh, my God, what the hell did I do this for? You know what people don't get is like, sarcasm. And like, I go to the guy, I go, how much you get if the gas, like if the winning ticket. I said, if the winning ticket comes out of here, what do you get? Nothing. I said, what?

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

Nothing.

[Pete Corieli]

I'm gonna need nothing. I. I said, does the gas station get anything? One million. One million. One million. I go, oh, the gas station gets a million. I go, what do you get out of that? Nothing.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

Oh, fuck.

[Pete Corieli]

You're like, I'm kind of goofy with you. Like, I go, you need to tell me this gas station wins a million and the Owner gonna give you nothing.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

Nothing. Ah, that's. And that is your level of caring, right? Because now you back online, and that's later. And that's it. You know, you're gonna get together with Kathy and Carol and Cindy and petition to Sunoco. I keep cursing, but, like, you know, it's. I tell you, though, it's like every gas station is playing the lotto, man. You know what I'm saying? You own a gas station, you could win a million dollars.

[Pete Corieli]

Well, the guy goes, we. I don't. We know. I can't even get the accent we had. And I go, two million. That's so want someone won $2 million out of the. Out of the gas station. I go, oh, so this is the lucky gas station. This is where the winners come out of nothing.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

No, no, bro, it's the other way around. Just rip up your ticket again. That's tapped out. You don't win twice. No gas station wins twice. It's done. Burn your ticket. What's up, man? What's up? What's up? What's up? What car are you in? I ain't in any of you. Let's go, man.

[Patrick]

You got to get out.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

Let's go. No, you got to go nowhere. I'm here.

[Pete Corieli]

I don't got.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

Yeah, I live here. You don't got. What you walking up on me like that for? What's up?

[Pete Corieli]

What's your address?

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

Take. Take that vest off.

[Pete Corieli]

Come on, take that vest off for me.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

Come on, take that vest off.

[Advertisement Voice 1]

You know.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

Come on, take that off.

[Pete Corieli]

Let's get it.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

All right. Let's get it, man. What's up?

[Pete Corieli]

What's up?

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

Take that off. Well, what you laughing for? I'm writing your. Take it off. Put your hand on your back.

[Pete Corieli]

Put your hand on your back.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

Put your hand your back. Stop resisting.

[Pete Corieli]

Stop resisting.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

No big deal. No big deal. No big deal. What are you watching, bro?

[Pete Corieli]

What am I watching? Yeah. This is what I have to. This is what I have to watch for the cast. It's research. This is a bigger macro problem I'm having. First it's the. It's the dancing at the airport. Now it's this. This is a complete breakdown in the family structure.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

Right?

[Pete Corieli]

That kid's parents failed in parenting, and now it's society's problem that we got to deal with the byproduct of parent failure, Right? Yeah.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

It's unbelievable.

[Pete Corieli]

I would go to the parents house after this and arrest them, too. The whole fucking family in the car down to the station. What?

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

You take I couldn't agree more. It seems to be what's happening now. Forget Patrick. Can we get a Google on what state just passed a law where the parents now can get arrested for the child being. Being not good. One of my favorite comedians. I know we don't normally do this. Underrated, in my opinion. A guy named Rich Voss. He's just so great. He had this great joke where he'd go, you know, you need a license to fish, but anybody could have a kid. And I mean, ain't it the truth? I think you should have. I don't think anyone should be allowed to have a kid. How about that? I don't think it should be a huge thing to have one. But I do think you know a couple of basic. Like, what would you feed your kid for breakfast on a regular basis in the Philly Froot Loops? Wrong answer, you're out. These are crazy. This is like, bad boys, bad boys. What you gonna do, right? Cops. That was that show.

[Pete Corieli]

Well, it's just like this cop had Hold a. You know, I could never be a cop because as soon as the kid started mouthing off, he'd be on the floor right now.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

Oh, my God.

[Pete Corieli]

What you want? I want boom, on the floor, into the fucking. That's it. So that's over.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

There's video and it sucks.

[Pete Corieli]

What?

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

The video sucks. It sucks that cops have to wear it. That people are holding it up. All of it sucks, though, man. Even my daughter. I gotta worry about a sucking face with one guy who's got a phone. And then next thing you know, this schmuck who does nothing with his life. But he's gonna have. All the whole time. He's gonna have my daughter when she was 15.

[Patrick]

Tongue in them.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

Loser. It's a shitty time to be a kid, man, with all that.

[Pete Corieli]

I know.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

Too many eyes on you, bro. You come walking up and. And the guy in the car is like, why did you pull me off over, Officer, you should be allowed as a cop to put your fist right through the window.

[Pete Corieli]

This is it, man. I know. Tighten it up.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

You're blaming me? Yeah. I felt like. I felt like you should have kind of figured out what was going on in that one, man.

[Pete Corieli]

No.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

All right. Wow.

[Pete Corieli]

The way. The way you described it, the guy was at home with a bat.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

Okay. I feel like you could have just said, oh. So, like. All right.

[Pete Corieli]

Listeners, chime in if you can on the comments and the next post in regards to this situation because I'm baffled. And the fact that you're wearing no Shoes is a sin at this age.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

Well, yeah, you know, we're gonna go tit for tat. Here, I got you. I got you a beautiful back spasm mechanism. And you go, I don't use it. Cause I don't like when people get me old. People stuff makes me feel old. And then you make this funny video with your compression boots on that somebody got you. But why does the maid, the housekeeper get all my stuff? And then other people's stuff gets on air.

[Pete Corieli]

Sorry about that, by the way. I still have the compression, the electromagnetics.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

And I can't use it on my knee the other day.

[Pete Corieli]

Beautiful. I'm gonna use it on my back tonight. So I'm breaking it out.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

Make a video.

[Pete Corieli]

Bro.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

Videos are more important than stand up. My family came over there, like, they go, I love Sebastian's dancing videos. Now. That's like, you know, you've done a movie and a TV show since I last saw them. And they come walking in talking about your dancing videos first.

[Pete Corieli]

Can't beat them. Join them.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

No, I'm trying. Mediocre at that.

[Pete Corieli]

Yeah, it's like the dancing videos. Apparently more people see the dancing videos than they saw the movie about my father. That's where we're at in entertainment right now, so.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

Well, yeah.

[Pete Corieli]

What's the week? What's the week? They're getting a dancing video.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

By the way, folks, the helicopter scene and about my father. I go on record putting it up there is one of the funniest goddamn scenes. It's like a Vince Vaughn scene and a Vince Vaughn. It's just fan fantastic. Makes me laugh every damn time.

[Pete Corieli]

Nobody saw it. Nobody saw it.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

You know what else I didn't see, thanks to you. I gotta get you out of my head sometimes creatively. My daughter's swimming at a high level. My brother came to visit. God damn, he is so goddamn funny, I can't even tell you. So he challenges my daughter to a swimming across the pool. And you know, he's a mess. He's got a hip problem and everything. So I'm about to video it, and I go, oh, we got da da.

[Pete Corieli]

Da, da, da da.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

And I go, you know what? I can't. I shut it down. And my sister goes, why are you videoing it? I go, sebastian said I've been making too many videos lately with my shirt off. I'm not about to go find my shirt just to make this video. So, you know, let's just have a family moment. I tell you, though, man, I, I, and, and right away, it's striking when I go to make a video. I've been living with me for over 50 years and I always go, God, that is a nice chest. Jesus Christ. If I could lay my own head on my own chest, I would, bro. I really would. Oh, I got a. I got a Vietnam chest. You know when you see a Vietnam movie and the guy's got hairy chest, that smoking pot out of their rifles and crazy. Oh, wow. A little self bragging. I tell you, man, your boy is. He's like a sponge, it seems to be for whatever you're saying. Now what do you think about. Because I like the idea of you're his father, you're not his buddy. I've seen through the years, what do you think about when the father is the best man for the son at the son's wedding?

[Pete Corieli]

That I don't have a problem with. I think as you older, as you grow older, a lot of sons and fathers have a bond that's like, you know, it's my. It's my mentor. It's my. The man I look up to all my life. I could see that. I'm just saying in these younger years. And I'm not saying I'm always in on my kids, because what you're not seeing is it's a new game I've implemented at night. And again, sometimes I gotta pat myself on the back because if I don't, nobody is. It's called ten questions. Now, the kids have a room where Seraphian's bedroom's here, Caruso's bedroom here, but there's a door in between. So you could open that door and you could see this kid. You could see that kid, right? So I stand in the middle of the door and I've asked Chatgpt come up with 100 questions for a 6 and 8 year old kid that are fun trivia things they would know. And the first one to 10 wins. Now what you win is daddy comes. It's kind of a weird prize. Daddy tucks you in last. So Caruso has lost the last seven nights. He hasn't won yet, right? Because Serafina is just older and beating him to the punch. So I go at tucking Caruso. And by the way, when I say tuck in, it's not tuck in, bro. I wanna get your take on this. I get under the sheets with my son. Me and him, we just sit, lay there next to each other. And then I tell him kind of a review of the day. I ask him, anybody make you laugh today at school? He goes, no, not today. I go, you make anybody laugh and he'll tell me a story. Oh, I made Fred laugh and we had a good time. Not that I ask him these probing questions, saying, listen, you got any crushes you like, any girls, you know, just goofing around, right? Just.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

Yeah, yeah.

[Pete Corieli]

If you need to tell me anything, you'll. I'll never. You'll never get in trouble, Anything going on in your life? You know, I just. I just pumping this into his head. Then I go to Seraphina's room and. Same thing. Goofing around with her. This, that and the other thing. I think the bedtime is the best time for these because, you know, during the day. Oh, school, fine. No, at the end, they want you to stay. At least. At least at this age, they want me to stay in the room because the longer I stay, the longer they stay up. So I got this game I'm doing.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

And.

[Pete Corieli]

I don't know if you've ever had this in your relationship. You ever do something and then they're like. Like Mommy wants to do what Daddy's doing. Like, Mommy wanted to do the questions. And the kids are like, no, no, Daddy does the questions. So.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

So what.

[Pete Corieli]

Now?

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

What about playing for 15 years if you got 2, 7, like Manute Bowl 7, 5, 7, 6. They only come out for field goals and they just jump up and block that shit. Is that. Why aren't we doing that?

[Pete Corieli]

Why?

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

What do you think?

[Patrick]

I mean, kickers are really good at getting the ball high. So your best chances now to block kicks are the long ones because the trajectory has to come out lower. But, I mean, it'd be a really interesting study to see where that. Where the ball crosses the line of scrimmage, what height and how tall. You would have to have a guy to do it.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

Be really interesting.

[Pete Corieli]

Pete, you're onto something, bro.

[Patrick]

This guy doesn't know any receivers, but he's changing the game.

[Pete Corieli]

All right?

[Patrick]

Before we could just throw you up in the air and you can block it.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

You're like a feather that way. You guys got me concerned that I'm getting sick and I don't even know it. I think I'm the same way. He hit me with the same last week. What are you talking about?

[Patrick]

Saying it looks bad. You just look.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

Disintegrating. I don't know.

[Patrick]

All right, so that's not a normal sized T shirt. Like, that shirt is tight on you and you're lean. If I tried to put that on, it would rip like the Hulk.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

You're not as Listen, I hate to say this. I think the worldly, but you're not as big as you used to be. So with the. With the whole kind of thing, you're kind of pedestrian now you're a little. Gotta run his body while you gotta. You gotta run his body. I gotta run his body.

[Patrick]

What do you got?

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

I was never an NFL defensive player.

[Patrick]

If you take a tumble down the stairs, a hip is gone and you're having one of those chairs that takes you up the stairs for the rest of your life. And you're doing the commercials where the tub that opens up and you stand in your shower.

[Advertisement Voice 2]

Okay?

[Patrick]

That's where you're at. So maybe eat a cheeseburger and stop doing the juice cleanses.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

All right? See, you're so mad that you're not as big as you used to be. That's what that is.

[Pete Corieli]

There you. You.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

You're throwing it back at me.

[Patrick]

I got a workout coming up in a couple hours. I'll send you a photograph.

[Pete Corieli]

All right?

[Patrick]

You tell me how big I am.

[Pete Corieli]

How about that?

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

Wow. Watt went on a rant, bro.

[Patrick]

To freaking Brookshire or wherever he moves and all of a sudden he's big dog on campus again. Because he's got a yard. 1, 2, 3. Temple is gone in the past and now he's big dog on. Where you you Yorkshire.

[Pete Corieli]

What big city did you move to?

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

Oh my. Pittsford. You don't even know how to respond, bro. I don't know. There's a lot coming at me.

[Patrick]

It's not fair, cuz I know everything about your guys lives because I listen every week and I follow you and I actually watch your videos and understand the references. But then I do something like put glasses on. You guys have no idea. So I. I just have to re evaluate all our friendship and where I thought we were at because I thought we were a lot closer than we actually are.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

We are, man. Yes, we are. We are we. Just that one thing caught me off guy. I was about to come on and someone was tweeting that you're wearing these glasses now all the time.

[Pete Corieli]

And I'm.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

3, 2, 1.

[Patrick]

What's my kid's name?

[Pete Corieli]

Oh, man.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

All right.

[Patrick]

You just tell Sadie and Jackie I say hi, all right.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

Sebastian.

[Patrick]

And make sure you get that dinged up fridge from your basement into the new house. Nice and easy. All right?

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

How did. Oh, you saw that video? Don't worry.

[Patrick]

Don't worry. I know it all, brother. I know it all.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

Oh, man. I know what I. Listen.

[Pete Corieli]

Koa and Nico.

[Patrick]

Nice Good job, Patrick. Nice feed. Nice feed.

[Pete Corieli]

Patrick.

[Patrick]

You just tell Seraphina and Caruso that life is good out there. I miss them. I want to see him sometime.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

Huh?

[Patrick]

All good, guys. It's all good.

[Pete Corieli]

Drum roll.

[Sebastian Maniscalco]

Boom. There you have it, folks. The Last of the 2025 Pete and Sebastian Best of episodes. It was a pleasure hosting these things and bringing them to you. I. I hope you enjoyed listening. We sure did enjoy. Have fun making them. And now it is time to plug back in and go live. And let's get started in 26, baby. We'll see you there. Let's have some fun. Let's do it. Thank you. Goodbye. Heaven must have sent you into my arms now in the morning. Well, the holidays have come and gone once again. But if you've forgotten to get that special someone in your life a gift, well, Mint Mobile is extending their holiday offer of half off unlimited wireless. So here's the idea. You get it now. You call it an early present for next year. What do you have to lose? Give it a [e-mail] Switch limited time.

[Advertisement Voice 1]

50% off regular price for new customers. Upfront payment required $45 for 3 months, $90 for 6 month or $180 for 12 month. Plan taxes and fees. Extra speeds may slow after 50 gigabytes per month when network is busy.

[Pete Corieli]

See terms from taco night in Tulum to sushi in Tokyo, make every bite rewarding with gold from Amex Wherever you die. 4 times. Membership Rewards points at restaurants worldwide are piling up. Learn [e-mail] Explore Gold terms and points Cap apply.