Adam Rippon (0:00)

Foreign. Hello, everyone. Welcome back to Intrusive Thoughts. I am your host, Adam Rippon, and it's so good to be here with you today. So, as I do on this podcast, I talk about things that happen in my life, things that are top of mind, intrusive thoughts. Thoughts. Correct. Correct. So I was just on a trip, and when you get back from a trip, you know, there is the process of opening up your suitcase, putting everything away, right? I truly believe that the trip isn't over until that suitcase is unpacked, that there is not a trace of that trip anywhere to be found. Suitcase has to be unpacked. It has to be put away. And so when I got back from this trip, and I'll get more into the trip, don't worry. I know that I have you so concerned of. But where was the trip? We'll get there, I promise. But I was on this trip, and when I opened up the bag, I thought to myself, I'm really doing it, because this was within minutes of being home. Okay? I'm really doing it. I'm really opening the bag. I'm getting this taken care of right away, which is what I like to do. Okay? I know there are people out there who you could walk into a bedroom or into some room in their house, and they go, oh, yeah, I was on a trip two weeks ago. Still haven't opened that bag. And those people scare me to death. I don't know how they move throughout the day without the crippling anxiety of knowing that they have an unopened suitcase. I don't know how they do it. Okay? Those are the strongest and maybe weakest people I know. I could never do that. I need to resolve the trip immediately. And the only way to do that is to get that suitcase open, emptied, and ready, put away quick, no time to waste. So I bring the suitcase upstairs. You know, I'm doing the right thing. And like I said, minutes, minutes home from the airport, I open the suitcase. And it's not the clothes that are the challenging part for me, because I bring the suitcase right up to where I have all of my clothes. So if I didn't wear any, they go right back into the drawers. And if they're dirty, you know, I was stealing that little laundry plastic bag that was in the closet of the hotel, and I was using that for my own laundry. Right? I was using that for my own laundry. That's what it's for. Put that bag, I empty it into the laundry. Now we're back on the cycle of laundry. Within the home. Okay? I'm. I'm integrating myself back into home life. It's just another part of coming back home from a trip. I know I'm making this trip sound like I was gone for three months. I was gone for two and a half days. All right? But it's still. It's all the same. It's the same process. And that's all you need to know. That's all you need to be worried about. So it's not the clothes, right? And it's definitely not the shoes because they take up a lot of room in the suitcase. So once you have them put away, there's not much left. Right? So I put the shoes right back where they came from. Shoes are gone, clothes are away. What could be left? Oh, yeah, Bingo. It's the toiletries. And when you are traveling, and I know that on this podcast, I make it seem like, wow, he must be in and out of the airport every other day. That's absolutely not the case. There were maybe two years ago. For two years. Up until about this year, I had not been to the airport in, like, two years, you know, maybe once a year. And before that, I was going all over the place all the time. Not, not. Not the case. Okay. So that's why they're so top of mind, all of these, like, travel stories. You know, I don't want you to think that I'm, like, trying to get in the same lane as, like, the points guy, right? I don't have any of those tips for you. I just have grievances from a Hudson news. I don't have any tips, and I'm just relaying my stories. I'm just letting you know what's going on in my life. And since we've relaunched the podcast, I've just been traveling, right? The stories will change, the information will become different. But at this moment in time, just know I am recording this live from a Hudson news. I'm not. I'm home. But you get the sentiment. Okay, the toiletries. I'm back to the toiletries. So you know that when you open the bag of where your toiletries belong, there's a few things that you can expect. One, that they all survived and nothing happened. Which is never what happens when you open that bag, right? You think that you put the caps on everything correctly. Of course you did. You heard the click. You heard that when you snapped your toothpaste bottle closed, you heard the lock. When you locked the little pump nozzle on your lotion bottle, Everything was going according to Plan. There was nothing for you to worry about when you put those toiletries away, or so you thought, right? Maybe you were not a hundred percent sure that you locked that little lotion bottle, right? Maybe you thought you got the lid of that thing into the ridges of the other part of the lid to do the locking of when you close a lid, right? Maybe you thought you did that. And sometimes, you know, for me, nine times out of 10, I did all of those things and there's nothing I can control. When, you know, you have a bottle that explodes from the pressure, the air pressure of being on a flight, you know, I'm well traveled, right? So I don't feel the pressure. But the bottles that I pack, they feel it immensely to the point of sometimes exploding under it. And when that happens, hey, whose fault is it really? It's not mine. It's a design flaw. And so you gotta just let that one go. So now back to me. I'm opening these in the bathroom. What's gonna happen? What is gonna happen when I open this bag? I know you are waiting with bated breath and I think maybe you've never felt the anxiety of I wonder what's going to happen when this guy opens his toiletry bag before. And I'm glad that I could be the first person to help you get there. So I open the bag and what do I see? Oh, I see baby powder everywhere. Everywhere. Everything is covered in powder. I opened this little toiletry kit and it looks like, like I'm opening an ancient trunk. Dust everywhere. It smells great though, but dust everywhere. If I open the lid too fast, a cloud of smoke pops out of my toiletry bag. It's a lot. It's a lot to handle for me. It's a lot to handle for anyone. So I don't know what I'm going to do at this point. Because you know, when you wet baby powder, it is sort of moisture wicking. So it doesn't just kind of brush off. And what am I going to do? Blow everything clean? I can't do that. I'm stuck. I'm in a bind. But I want you to know, because I know there are going to be some questions of why do you need baby powder? Like, how did that get in there and what are you doing with it? I kind of need to know now, right? Like don't, don't bury the lead on the baby powder. Because I do kind of understand that you, when you heard that there was baby powder everywhere, your first reaction wasn't probably, oh no, it was probably, why do you have baby powder? I'll. I'll tell you why. Now, a few weeks ago, I had gotten really into scent layering. All right. I don't know if you know what that is, but it's basically you take products that have heavy scents, and you just layer them on top of one another. All right? So I've really liked this process, and I've really enjoyed it. So let me take you through it now. Did I invent it? No, of course not. Did I implement it into my everyday life? I did. And it will kind of circle right back into how did the baby powder get in there? And why does it look like you're going through antiques now when you're just trying to get your toothpaste? And I want you to know before I continue, baby powder everywhere. In the grooves of every bristle of my toothbrush. Can't use that one anymore. Can't use that anymore. Okay. New toothbrush head. Sorry. Just in the cracks of every sort of lotion bottle. It did find its way into the ridges. It's just everywhere. It's incredibly invasive. It's intrusive. Intrusive thoughts. Now, where was I? Scent layering. I want to take you through. What does it look like when someone like me layers scents? I will tell you. So it starts with, you get into the shower. And I'm going to go a step further, and I'm going to tell you the process and the order that I do that I think is the most successful order of how you do things in the shower to be the most clean. Because I like being clean. Okay. And actually, before we even get to the shower routine, I'm going to tell you that I like to take the cleaning shower at night before I get into bed, right. I want the bed to be clean, and I want the bed to see the version of me that's the cleanest. And then I know that what I'm about to say is controversial, but I think that sometimes people who take a shower at night have a bad rep for kind of smelling like they just woke up in the morning. Now, I avoid this completely. And I. Like I said, I know that not everybody's gonna love this, but what I do is I do a rinse in the morning, all right? You know, I was just stationary for seven to nine hours in that bed. I know that there are some, you know, night smells. It's inevitable. I'm only human, right? Oil builds up sweat. Sometimes you get a little hot in there sometimes. Whatever. I'm just trying to Rinse that off, because I want to start anew. And I know not everybody's going to love that, because when I do see people online talking about their shower routines and what they do in the shower, I'll be honest, sometimes it is a bit alarming when I hear somebody talk about what they think is clean, because to me, it's not. It's still severely, severely dirty. Okay? It's still severely dirty. Now, I wasn't always like this. Do you know what I mean? And I am disgusted to say this, but, like, when I was, you know, a teenager, I remember just, like, I go to bed. Like, I don't know how. I just, like, go to bed, dirty body into bed. Sounds awful. I don't even think I could get comfortable. You know, I'll be honest, there are nights where I'm like, I don't want to do the full, you know, routine. And believe me, it's like a routine. It takes a minute. It's not that simple. It's not that easy. But when I was a teenager, you know, you just go to bed, you wake up, and that's the time you have to take a shower in the morning, right? You know, I'm also from a big family, so it's like we were. Had shifts when we needed to clock into the bathroom. We had one bathroom that, like, six kids shared. And so my shift always ended up being in the morning. And I, you know, you gotta take the time that you can get. So I just think that there wasn't time for me to take a shower at night, you know? But anyway, in the morning, it was wash that hair. Apricot St. Ives face scrub. Ripping apart my. My skin, just ripping it to shreds with those plastic beads. You know, we're so concerned about microplastics now when, you know, not too long ago, I was using macro plastics to scratch off of my skin as a teenager. So, you know, we've come a long way. But just remember, we carry the scars of our past along with us. Wear your scars proudly. Mine are from the St. Ives beads in the apricot face scrub. All right? And I've progressed from this routine, and I've learned a lot. And I've learned what I like. I learned what I have not liked, and I like it all. All right, now, the thing is, you get into the shower, right? And the first thing I do, it's the first thing I do, I take an oil face cleanser. Mm, yeah, you heard me right. Oil face cleanser. And that's my first Cleanse of the double cleanse. All right? And I do that because it emulsifies in the water. Now, what does that mean? It means that basically it turns to, like, a milky, sort watery texture from oil, and then it, like, rinses off your face. And this breaks down the sunscreens, it breaks down the oils and dirts. So that when I get to the second cleanse, you know, I'm getting deep into the epidermis, deep as far down into the skin as humanly possible. All right? I start there. Now, do I immediately go to the second part of the double cleanse? Do I immediately go to double cleanse after single cleanse? No, I don't do that. I start there because if I have wet hands, the cleansing oil emulsifies. All right, now we both know what that means. It breaks down into a milky, watery texture. So after I do the first part of the double cleanse, I go right to the hair, all right? And we do the shampoo. We lather it into the hair. Lather, lather, slather, bather. Okay? I do that. I rinse it out. I make sure it's all out. Then we go right to conditioner. The conditioner is in there. We got to let that sit and set for just a moment. The hair can get dry, it can get frizzy. We got to do everything in our power to make sure that that hair stays not dry. Okay? I don't know, moist, not. You don't want wet hair. You just want hair that's not brittle to the bone. Because I have curly hair. And I know that might be, like, a shock to somebody who. If maybe they've never seen me with curly hair, but, like, as an 18 year old, I was going around looking like I was a Shirley Temple impersonator. I really do have, like, ringlet curls. I want you to think, like, birthday present. And yeah, maybe for the last 10 years, have I been getting Brazilian blowouts to have straight hair, just to have a moment of order in my life? I have, but I embraced who I am naturally, which is bone brittle hair could snap it off of my head if it gets too dry. That's why I got to use the conditioner. Now, when we wait for the conditioner to kind of set and be ready, we just kind of sit there. We just enjoy being in the shower. But then we got to rinse it off, all right? And I want you to know that when we're rinsing it off, we're rinsing from the top down, right? So, like, now we have, like, dirty hair juice flowing down. So that's why I haven't gotten to the body yet, right? We're just letting the dirty hair juice go down. So now that we have the head sort of immediately addressed, I think now is a good time to get to the body. And what am I using? Listen, not my hands. I'm using a physical object to scrub this shit down. All right? I'm using an African net sponge. The first time I ever used an African net sponge, I did give myself a full body brush burn. I scrubbed the skin almost down to the bone because I thought, just keep going, keep going. You're gritting your teeth. You're biting your lip until it bleeds. Like, it hurts so bad the first time you do it. You go, how do people do this? And some people do it every day. And then something inside of you breaks. You snap. And somehow the skin builds a tolerance to the scrubbing. The absolute pressure you put of this African nut sponge into the skin. Scrub, scrub. It's like you're scrubbing as hard as somebody in a TV show is. Like washing laundry in a lake, right? Like, they're taking that, like, laundry thing, and they're just, like, scrubbing the clothes on that, like, metal cheese grater thing. That's how hard I'm going, right? I want all the dead skin off. I only want to be covered in living skin. I don't want dead skin anywhere, nowhere to be found. I only want to be covered in living skin. Now I'll go back. You know, I'm using kind of like whatever oil cleanser I can find on the face. It's only there for a second. I don't need it to be good. I need it to be cheap, and I need it to work. All right, the shampoo, the conditioner, what am I using? Costco. Big, giant motherfucking bottles. Huge bottles that I have for months on end. All right, now we're getting to the soap. What am I. What am I using? You can tell I'm passionate because I'm just. I'm talking so quickly. All right, what am I using for the soap? I'm using the gold bar of dial soap. It's antibacterial. It's killing bacteria. Now, I know we're all bacteria, right? We need some. But I'll never pass up on the chance to kill a little bit of it, right? We don't need it all. I don't think we need all the bacteria. Just a little bit. And somehow I feel the comfort of this golden dial bar. Of soap. Yeah. I'm using bar soap, right. Because shower gel has a lot of moisturizing properties to it. I don't think shower gel's number one job is to kill bacteria. I think sometimes it does, but you can tell it gets a little lazy sometimes. No offense to the shower gel industry. So I'm using the gold bar of dial soap. Antibacterial. It's important to me. I mentioned it before. We don't need all the bacteria. Some of it can go off. All right, after that, I am going to take a shower gel. I know it, talked a little bit of about it. I am going to use it now, right? Because I do like the moisturizing quality. So I, I use that and then once I do the whole body, I go back to the face and I go, all right, old friend, here we go. And I'm using some sort of face wash with, like, some sort of active ingredient, like a salicylic acid or a benzoyl peroxide. Right. If I'm feeling really dirty. Now back to scent layering. This is how I got on this storytelling journey. How did I get to. And, and, and if you remember, there was baby powder at the beginning of this story. I'll get there. I'll get there. Believe me, Believe me. I don't want to get off track. I'm not one to get off track. I am, but not today. So scent layering now, you know, the whole deal of what I'm doing in the shower, the process, and you know, it's not, it's. You're not, it's not a five minute in and out, right? In the morning, I'm wetting the hair, right? I'm just like wetting the hair. I'm washing the face. I'm just kind of like splashing the armpits and the cracks and nooks and crannies. That's what I'm doing. It's just a little water I'm splashing, right. I put lotion on and everything after. But. Okay, I want to get back to the night shower, whatever the scent layering. All right, now how does this work? So you want to make sure that the products that you're putting on have like a heavy scent to them. I haven't gotten this far into the process, but believe me, I will because I did download the Bath and Body Works apple because I'm not ever paying full price for something at Bath and Body Works. It's just. That's not, that's not ever going to happen. You know, I'M really sorry to the company, but I am only going to be buying things at a severe discount. I am going to be adding up every coupon and walking in there, robbing them blind with their own money. Okay, I'll get there. But. So I haven't gotten to owning the products with the heavy sense yet. But in theory, this is how it would go. When you wash yourself with the body wash, it has a nice luxurious, beautiful smell to it, right? Like that's what you would start with. And then once you turn the water off, then you'd put on a lotion that has like a nice scent to it and then an oil that has a nice scent to it. And then you'd use a body dusting powder. Uh huh. Right. So what's a body dusting powder? Basically it's just cornstarch and basically that's just baby powder. Okay, so now we're like on the same page. Okay, now before I go any further, I want to talk a little bit about putting lotion on. Now listen, lotion can feel like gloppy gloopy and nobody likes that feeling. But the key to putting it on and not feeling gloppy gloopy is that when you are done taking a shower, you take your towel and you don't like dry completely off so that you know, you can see the white flakes of your skin like peeling up again. You go, oh, here we go again. You just do a little pat. You want to still be damp, right? You still want a little like water droplets, a few of them, like on the arms, on the legs, on the back. Like you still, you want the water. It's going to help you when you get to the lotion part. So I actually have the bottle of lotion in the shower, all right? And I take that lotion and I say to myself, here goes nothing. I say that, I say that out loud, actually. I go, oh, here goes nothing. And I do one pump and I take the pump and I put it on. I'm still damp, right? Like I just did pat, pat, pat, pat on the body. I didn't really do like dry, dry, dry. I did pat, pat, pat. I do that. Hence the lotion goes on. And while I'm doing this, somehow I'm like almost basically dry because I'm basically kind of working the water into the skin so that like it stays within the barrier of my skin barrier. And then you put a little oil on after that you lock it all in and somehow I'm begging you to believe me, you do not feel sticky, gloppy or gloopy. You just feel good and moisturized and complete and a winner. You feel like a winner. It's really nice. So basically, you get to, you know, if you're doing scent layering, all of these things have scents. I haven't. And I have, like, a strict, like, you must empty the bottle policy to, like, move on to your next step. And by step, in this case, I mean a scented bottle of lotion. So I'm just. I'm stuck with what I have. I've promised myself that I will not get any other lotion until I finish what I have. So I. I'm. It's sort of like, do as I say, not as I do for right now when it comes to scent layering. But, I mean, that's if you're really into it. Right? So. So let me just take a side step. If you're in the lotion oil, sort of like realm right now, what would you do to make your cologne last longer? Oil and all of that stuff is going to make it last longer. So then this is when you'd spray the cologne on. It's going to just stay a little bit longer. That's how you smell a little bit better. But the idea of scent layering is that, like, underneath that is like a scented lotion, and underneath that is, like a scented body wash. Okay, you got me. Now I know that I've really taken you on a wicked ride, a totally bizarre roller coaster of, okay, you started this with opening your suitcase and having a toiletry bag that was filled with baby powder. Well, how did we get here? Okay, so the dusting powder. Now, you would lock everything even more with a little bit of dusting powder. And I've actually found this, like, fascinating. And I love it. I love it so much. So you can scent the baby powder. All right, so hear me out. You take, like, cotton rounds, and you're supposed to take, like, some sort of, like, scented oil or like a concentrate of a perfume or something, and you're supposed to put it on, like, a cotton round. And then you put that in a jar with baby powder and you shake it up and you just kind of, like, let it sit. And then that kind of gets into the scent of every sort of molecule of the powder. And I can't explain it, but it works. Now, do I have, like, a scented oil? I don't. So what am I using? Well, over the years, I've accumulated, like, handfuls of different perfume samples. Okay. And so I'm using like 35 different samples to make one cotton round sometimes. Does it smell like crazy? Yeah, it does. But, you know, the scent of the baby powder, it all kind of works its way out. Like I said, this is not really the professional's way around it. It's just I'm doing what I can with what I got. But let me tell you, that powder, because I'm putting it in, like, a beautiful, like, little glass jar and I got a cheap little makeup brush, okay? So I'm like, pop, pop, popping that brush into the powder and I'm like, powdering myself. I'm like Nefertiti, right? Some Egyptian queen. That's what I feel like. I just feel like royalty. I feel quite expensive that I have this process. Even though everything I have explained is a product that is less than $5. It doesn't matter. Price is price does not make one good or bad. Right? You know what I mean? I can't think about how I'm trying to say this, but it doesn't really matter. I'll get back on track immediately. What I do is I have found. All right, you know what? I'll come clean with you. I'll just be, like, totally real with you. Sometimes I can have a sweaty ass. I'm not too proud to admit it. It is just true. And I know I'm not alone because I see some of you out here with some crack sweat coming out of your shorts at the gym. I see it. I'm not looking, but I see it, okay? And yeah, I get it, too. I'm only human. And sometimes humans butt cracks sweat. And mine does. It's like part of my experience here on this planet. So I discovered through this process of. I actually love putting a little baby powder between those cheeks. I love putting it in, like, the groin area and a little bit on the thighs because I'll tell you, God, they just. There is no kind of tension when the thighs might kind of slide against one another. It actually feels quite nice. And I can't tell you the relief I have of having a dry butt crack. It's great. And so, you know, am I doing the. The dusting powder on the chest and, like, everywhere every day? No, but. Oh, well, another place I'm going to tell you, like, it's really good here under the arms. Little baby pattern in that hand. Rub those hands together. Pat, pat under the arms. Those pits are dry, right? Like, why weren't we ever using the powder? I'll tell you, sometimes I overdo it, and it does get everywhere. Right. Like, it gets all over my pants. It gets on every single inch of my shirt. Like, it looks like I fell into a vat of flour at a bakery. Like, it does. Look, I. And it's to the point where it's like, you got to change your shirt, buddy. You got to change your shirt. You don't look good. So, yeah, I've overdone it a few times, but I'm getting into the rhythm of doing it properly. So, you know, that is why it has become really important to me to travel with baby powder. And that's why I had it with me. All right, you got me. That's why I had it with me. And that's why I was just trying to have a dry bum, right? Like, during the day. Sue me. And I did, because, you know, it didn't happen until I got home, thank God. But, you know, the little baby powders, I just didn't twist the bottle closed. It was my fault. I didn't twist the bottle closed, so it was completely on me. You live and you learn, but damn, you know, and. And where is the toiletry bag right now in this moment? Yeah, it's in the bathroom. So, yeah, I am living in this purgatory of life before this trip, life after, because I haven't fully put everything away yet. It's actually even stopped my progress. If you can see. If you're watching the video of this, you can see my little green suitcase in the background. That's the suitcase from the trip. I haven't opened it yet. So, yeah, I'm not mentally completely stable right now. I'll get there. I will get there. So where was I on this trip? And I promise I will stop talking soon. I know it's been a lot. I'm already, you know, I'm overstaying my welcome. But again, this is a podcast that you decided to listen to. It's called Intrusive Thoughts. What did you think was going to happen here? I was traveling to Colorado Springs to work with some of the figure skaters getting ready for the Olympics that are upcoming in February of next year. And I was working with them on, like, how to deal with social media and things that they could post and help them get together. Like, an idea of things that they could do while not taking away from their skating. Right. I'm such a good candidate for that because, you know, wouldn't take away from their skating a little baby powder here or there. But what would. The baby powder exploding throughout everything they own. That is what happened to me, I guess. There's a few things I could talk about, you know, and I promise I'll get to the voicemails. You know, one of the things that a lot of these kids said was that they didn't know what to post and they would feel like self conscious about it. And I think that's just something that we can all relate to. Now I'm gonna get a little bit real, right? Like we all can relate to that. Where sometimes you post something and feel like, why would I ever do that? It's the dumbest thing anybody would ever do. And I think I need to take a little bit of my own advice because I was like, nobody cares. Sometimes I'm like, everybody cares. But I don't really think everybody cares to the point maybe nobody cares. Just do your own thing, right? When I was at the Olympics, when I was competing myself, I really did not care what I posted. You know, I was mindful that I was mindful in a way that I think people aren't today of what you post on the Internet lives forever. You know, I think in a way people are like, whatever. And they'll post crazy things where I'm like, you know, in 10 years you'll think it's absolutely insane that you shared this information. You didn't have to, you know, for a hundred thousand likes on a TikTok video, you did not need to share that you wipe your poo poo butt with your hands and you don't use toilet paper, right? You didn't need to share that. You did not need to share that you don't wear sunscreen. Because we can tell, right? We can tell that you don't do that. So I was mindful of like, you know, only sharing what I wanted. And I think it was not until I encountered like my first instance of retaliation from an Internet crowd where I was like, okay, I don't know if I can do this. And so I get it. I get that, like, fear. And I feel like since I sort of opened a little bit of the Pandora's Box of like, what was the retaliation? What could you be talking about? There's like two instances that I can think of that let's just talk it out, right? Like, maybe it'll be a bit therapeutic for me or not, right? Maybe I'll just sort of be like, oh my God, crippled with anxiety again. And maybe that anxiety will help me kind of clean out that toiletry bag or not. I don't know. We're gonna talk about it anyway. So there's two things there's two, like, big moments in my Internet life that stop me in my mother tracks, okay? Like, they just stop me dead in my tracks. The first one was I did these videos for Cosmopolitan magazine, for Cosmo, right? And I did a lot of them, and they were just, like, really fun and silly, and I loved the people that I worked with, and I did them anytime I was in New York. And I was in New York a ton back in the day. And so I'd pop into the office and we'd film some, like, videos for YouTube and, like, whatever. They were just silly and fun. I remember the first one that I did with them. It was like, I had to do, like, a breakdown of what happened at Meghan Markle's wedding. And the producer, her name was Amanda, she was like, did you watch it? And I looked at her and I said, no, I have no idea who a lot of these people are. And so she talked me through it, and it was with, like, puppets, and it was ended up being quite funny, and we had a lot of fun. And then we did another one where I was, like, ranking celebrity roses. You know, back in the day, this was a job, right? But these videos were just, like, funny and fun. And then we did another one for the VMAs. Now, this is, like, what. This is where things got crazy, right? This is how I dealt with my first Internet goes crazy. Now, when you talk about the VMAs, one of the things that obviously comes up is when crazy racist Nazi Kanye west goes onto the stage and he rips the award out of a young Taylor Swift's hand, and he says, you know, congratulations, but Beyonce had the best music video of all time. We all know it, right? I don't need to go into it into more detail, but you have to imagine that. That when you are talking about this and you're trying to give some color commentary, right? That you'll, like, do whatever. Okay. Basically, let's just get right to the meat and potatoes. Obviously. Do I think that Kanye west should have ripped the award out of her hand? No. And did she deserve it? Probably. But it was that single lady's music video. And so I think I said something in this video. Like, I have no idea what I said for real, because I'm not gonna go back and watch it. But it said something along the lines of, like, I mean, he was right. Something like that. Like, that. I love that Single Ladies music video. I do think it's one of the greatest music videos of all time. It's one of the most iconic ones of, like, our generation. Okay, so that's what I said. Something like that. Well, that did not sit well with some Swifties, let me tell you. That did not sit well. Now, the video, like, because it's not immediately that I get this, like, Internet reaction now the video is like, whatever. Because in this. In the whole entire YouTube video, you can see that it's a very, like, tongue in cheek comment. And you see that I'm not, like, siding with Kanye west, right? Like, it's fairly obvious in this comment that I'm not siding with him. Right? Or so I thought. Okay, so what happens is, is the video goes up. Cute. Another fun little YouTube video for Cosmo magazine. Good for us. Good for them. Now, a few years later, yes. Do I get to do a music video with Taylor Swift? And I know the way that I just phrased that sounds. We wrote a song together and I said, let's just shoot something. Which is, like, not the case at all. What happened was I was at an event and Taylor Swift was there, and she pointed at me and she said, are you're the figure skater? And I pointed at her and I said, you're the singer? And she said, I'm going to reach out to you. I said, okay. And so then a little bit later, she reached out to me. Her team reached out to me and asked if I was available to be in a music. In her music video. I keep saying in a music video with her. Like, again, I am insinuating that we wrote a song together. We didn't. Okay. And so obviously I said yes, right? Everybody loves Taylor Swift. Everybody should love Taylor Swift. Who cares if you don't like Taylor Swift? I think it's for, like, a weird reason. Okay, I'm putting that out there. So I'm in the music video. It's fun. I want to tell you something about Taylor Swift. Okay, I'm just gonna say this. She was so nice to not only me. She was so nice to everybody on that set. And that will stay with me for, like, my entire life of how nice she was. She's like the mo. One of the most famous people in the entire world. And she was nice to everybody on that set. And she went and, like, you know, when she was filming the music video, like, tons of people all there and, you know, eating lunch together, and you forget it's like, oh, that's Taylor Swift. Because she's just sitting on the floor to make sure that somebody else has a chair. Right? She just was really normal and she was really nice. And I was really impressed with how nice she was. And so, you know, if I wasn't a swiftie before, I was. I definitely was. I'm a lifer now and I think that she's just a really impressive person. Now I'm gonna get to whatever. So basically Cosmo, like does a super cut of this video and, you know, they make it really fast and they do whatever. And there was some swifties who were not pleased with the way that this supercut was done. How did I find out about it? Oh, I was bamboozled with comments and messages. Thousands. On every podo podo, on every photo I've ever posted in my entire life, There were about 1 million clown faces and rat emojis. Why the rat? I don't know. I don't know what they think. But, you know, so many comments. I mean, some of them were quite, you know, hilarious in their intensity of Taylor needs to vet the people around her better. Okay, you guys, relax, Please relax. I'm begging you to relax. I'll tell you what was sort of the line. I knew that, you know, I knew what I like, I knew that the whole video, it was a very like tongue in cheek sort of thing. And I knew that these people are only watching this like five second clip of a TikTok, whatever, and they're taking away from it from whatever. I'll tell you, a lot of these people can't. Don't have any sense of humor. Now, what was the line that I felt was crossed? All right, I'll tell you what it was. This is what made me go, I think I need to take a break from the Internet. And it's stuck with me because I used to post all the time. Now I don't really. And this is sort of. This was one of the first times I felt like, all right, I gotta relax on this. And when I say this, I mean the Internet. And so that is. Somebody said, this is what I think of you. I think you're even worse than this. You're even lower level than this. What could it be? And they put a picture in there. Well, it was a picture of their own. Sit down and stop eating if you're eating. When I say this, diarrhea in the toilet, not poop. Okay? I want you to know that it wasn't poop. It was diarrhea in the toilet. It was their own. And they said, oh, my God. Now I, you know, they said, this is what I think about you. Well, one, I don't think about you at all but two. I need to know something. I want to know if they had just done that diarrhea, or if they had diarrhea and took a picture of it for, you know, just in case for an emergency. And this is the emergency. They pull the emergency handle. They go, oh, now is the time. Let me go into my photo album of different shots of my own diarrhea and a toilet. Well, if that's the case, it was worth it because they found the place, the time, and the person. They sent it right over to me, and that's when I went, I need to take a break from this. This is a bit too intense. So I get it right now. The second time where I was like, this is a lot, a lot, a lot, a lot was pre Pandemic. Now, they. I had, during the Olympics, mentioned that I was a big fan of RuPaul's Drag Race. Like, I loved watching Drag Race, and this was before it, like, very, very popular. And I say that because, you know, there were only a few friends of mine who were also watching it. And I also say it because, like, when RuPaul's Drag Race was still in its, like, infancy, it felt like you were showing friends who had never seen the show, like, ancient text. Like, you were showing them something so incredible that, like, they were shocked that they didn't know existed. So you felt an incredible responsibility and an immense amount of power when you were able to do this and when you were able to sort of go through and give them the, like, okay, you're gonna start here. My two favorite, like, seasons are you gotta watch season five, season four All Stars two. Like, you know, that's. That's really what you were doing. And then when you got into it, you would go back, because then you'd, like, really appreciate the earlier seasons. And, yeah, it's just. It's just fun. It was like a real underground society. And, you know, in the years from that I started watching it, it became more popular. It was, like, on VH1, and it just became a much bigger thing. And I think I must have talked about it in, like, an interview or whatever. And I was asked to be, like, a guest judge. And so I had already met with, like, the people who did the reaching out and whatever, and was already, like, prepared to, like, go and do everything, I even think, to the point where I had already been a guest judge. And it just was, like, an episode that was filmed maybe. I don't know. Actually. No, that's not true. That isn't true, because. All right, I'm gonna tell you what happened. So I'll tell you what is true, because now it's making sense to me that I'm reflecting on it. So they asked me if I wanted to be a part. Okay, be a part of the season 10 ruval. Now, what is the reveal if you don't watch Drag Race? Basically, it's like a YouTube event. It's like a live YouTube video. I don't even know if they do it anymore. I think they might have stopped doing it literally after I was part of it. Hear me out, okay? None of this was my fault. Asked me if I want to be a part. I said, for sure I'd want to be a part. Like, I love Drag Race. Why wouldn't I want to be a part of this? That's going to be amazing. And, you know, the LGBTQ+ community is always so supportive. I say, as my eyeballs roll out of my head and blood trickles out of my ear, right? They can be the hardest people to please sometimes. Now I say, sure, I would love to be a part of it. And so it's like the day before we're gonna shoot, and they send me some, like, information over. The information is basically just like, you're gonna be the one who's introducing the queens. Like, you're gon one who's introducing. So I'm basically finding out, like, the night before, like, I'm hosting it. I'm like, oh, okay. And I was asking like, oh, can I get any more information on them so that, like, I know a little bit about them? Because, like, listen, like, like, support your local drag queens, right? But, like, I don't know who anybody on the show is going to be. I don't know who they are, and why would I want to, like, go there and not be prepared? And they're like, we can't do that because we don't want anything to leak the day before, but you'll have some time in the morning. So, like, in the morning, I was like, I had 20 minutes just to see the. The list and, like, the packet. And, you know, they had a list of, like, a few questions I could ask, and I. They told me that I was going to be doing this with this queen named Aquaria. And I say, this queen named Aquaria, she had won the season before, and she's, like, an incredible queen. And I think even in the past, usually it's been a one of the drag queens of the past seasons who's gone and hosted this. So obviously, yeah, I probably should have been a drag queen. I didn't know. I thought I was just going to be apart, right? Like, I thought maybe I'd be like, congratulations. Like, give them their diploma at the end. Like, if they were graduating something. Not the case. Not. Okay, that's just not the case. So where are we? We're in, like, some studio in New York in, like, sort of a basement. Ish area. All right. And I have this, like, long list of questions I can ask. And I'm going to be doing this. And I say this in quotes with Aquaria. Like, what does that mean? Well, I'll tell you. It means that the day before, okay, the day before I was there, Aquaria was in the studio with the queens and she shot these, like, games that she played with them the day before, right. So basically, the way it was going to look, if you're following me at all, if this means anything to you at all, okay, this is what it was supposed to look like. I was supposed to be with the queens, introduce them, interview them for, you know, a few minutes, and then I go, okay, over to Aquaria. You're going to go back to Aquaria and you're going to play a game. But that part was taped, right, the day before. But I had no idea, like, how, like, query. Had no idea how I was gonna throw it to her video, and I had no idea how she was gonna throw it back to me. I just knew that there was, like, a video of her happening at the same time. We had never met and we were, like, hosting this together. I pass out telling the story. So I think it goes, like, fine. It goes as well as it could have because I didn't. I hadn't met any of the queens before. And I wanted to make sure that, like, I was asking the question because I didn't know if there was a certain thing that they wanted to talk about in the whatever, you know, like, this is why it would have just made sense if it was a actual drag queen. They probably would have known them or at least known of them or known something that that specific queen maybe would have wanted to talk about or share about themselves. I didn't. So I was like, I'm just reading the list. And I think what was supposed to take an hour took, like, two and a half hours. I was reading every question. I want you to know I was being as thorough as possible, throwing it to Aquaria. Aquaria. And now there was a big disconnect of. I'm like, back to you. And then the first thing, Aquaria would say was, I can't believe, like, it would just be like, nothing matched. Right. So it was, like, kind of messy. I don't like, you know, it was. It went as well as, like, whatever. And let me tell you, you would have thought that I pulled out a gun and shot somebody in the town square. The way that I saw. Got messages from people, you would have thought that I personally specifically was responsible for 911 was the intensity of people going, finally, I have a reason to hate Adam Rippon. And I was like, holy. I wish you would have just sent me a picture of your diarrhea. Because I got like, thousands of messages like that of, like, you were so disrespectful, you didn't know who anybody was. I can't believe that you would do something like that. Like, you suck. And a lot of, like, I always found him annoying, and I didn't know why, and now I know why I fucking hate him. And it was like, whoa, okay. And so that's when I was like, I do need to take, like, a break from the Internet. Because I think really up until that point, I've had only, like, mostly positive sort of interactions on the Internet. But this is like, when it felt really, like, directed to me, specifically where I was like, holy. And, you know, I've slowly, like, found my way back onto it. But it's always, like, it always sticks with you where you're like, what? That was a little uncalled for. And, you know, I've talked to a lot of the queens about after. Some of them have like, been like, girl, tell me what happened. And, you know, it just. It is what happens sometimes. Like, it's not all going to be together. Right. But it's not like I went out of my way to make sure that Aquaria didn't have a job. Right. It's not like I said, whatever you do, I'll do it, but make sure that a query. It is the taped thing the day before and that it make it sound like we have no chemistry whatsoever. Right. And, like, wasn't that crazy? It just was what it was. They tried something that was maybe not a great idea. Huh. But anyway, the reaction to it was a little intense. So. So, like, it. I understand when people are like, I'm afraid of what to post or if I don't know what to. But, you know, like, even that intensity. Yeah. Like, every once in a while, somebody will still, like, it's years later at this point. Every once in a while, somebody will, like, bring it up and really Think that they're like pulling a fast one. But my advice is that if you ever go through something like this, just like let it. Especially if you didn't do anything wrong. Right? Like if you didn't do anything wrong, just like let time pass. Just let the time pass. And you know, it does eventually, like the time passes, people forget and they stop telling you to kill yourself. Not all the time. I still do get that sometimes, but here I am still standing. Yeah, I'm trying to think of anything else from that situation. No, I think that's it. But so basically those are the two things that I was going to talk about. I think the moral of the story is I've had three kind of key takeaways from this is that, you know, I told a lot of these like, athletes of like, don't be afraid to post. Just like post whatever, who cares? I gotta remember that more. I think we all do. Like, we still need to have fun. I think that there's like a limit, right? Like, I do definitely think there's a lot of people who cross the line of, like, don't share that. Like, you don't need to be sharing that. Oh, I remember what I was going to talk about, that I said that up until those points, like, I had a really positive relationship with like things that were online. And that is true. But I remember when I was competing at the Olympics myself. When I was at the Olympics, you know, my first time, it's 2018, that like I had a lot of political eyes on me because before the games had even started, I was. And I do want to take a moment of saying I love that we started with me going through my shower routine to get to the second part of me being actually sort of heartfelt. You know, it's intrusive thoughts, right? I didn't say that they were clear, conscious thoughts or thought out thoughts. It's intrusive. So when I was at the Olympics, I had my first sort of bout of like a lot of attention online because before I competed I was asked about like Mike Pence leading the athlete delegation and he had like a history of like trying to promote sort of legislation that would that like supporting conversion therapy. And you know, it was insinuated that maybe he did or whatever. Obviously like his office like denied it, but you know, he calls his wife mother. It's all weird. I mean, it's all weird. Back in the day. God, Mike Pence's. Who would say that now that we miss little Mike Pence. Okay, My eyes are two Saucer plates wide, because I'm paralyzed in fear and shock. So obviously, if you opposed the Trump administration even in round one. Right? Even in round one, when you opposed them, there was, like, obviously a lot of people online who were like, go die. If you hate the Trump administration so much, then go home, represent another country. Give back all the money you've ever gotten from the US Government for your training. Which one? US Athletes don't get any money from the US Government. We have to pay our own motherfucking way. And if you do get money, it's from prize money or private sponsorships, right? Like, it's not from the. The sports are not a government program. So there was no money to give back. And also, being American, one of the most amazing things about being American is being able to speak your mind and being able to share your views. So I honestly feel like it was me representing my country to the best of my ability. When I was saying that I disapproved of Mike Pence leading the athlete delegation. Well, that doesn't stop Don Jr. From going, hey, like this. This tweet, if you fucking hate Adam Rippon. Come on. Hey, like this tweet, if you think Don Jr. Should stop doing hard drugs before his Fox News interviews. Like, okay. And so that was my first time, but, you know, it was different. I didn't feel like I should step away because I think that, you know, I hated Donald Trump and still do to this day to my very core. Right. But I felt really passionately about what I was defending and the people who were reaching out to me and, like, genuinely, truly nasty people. Those people were not the people that I really cared to impress. And I felt a lot of support from a lot of people. And I think that these other things, like, why they bothered me was because, like, I liked Taylor Swift music. I was a fan of hers before I had even met her, and I really liked Drag Race. And I think it really hurt my feelings. I'm being totally honest. It hurt my feelings that, like, the communities of people that I felt like I was kind of a part of were like, get out. And so that's why I think that those specific instances on the Internet hit me a little bit different. But you know what? Time passes and you start a podcast, and then you can just talk truly into the abyss, which I love doing. I really. I do love doing it. One more thing. More intrusive thoughts. It's not really, like, all stringing together. Maybe it is a little bit. But while I was on this trip, the protests in LA started. So when we record these episodes, sometimes we record them in advance and we do that just in case, you know, something comes up, but so that we can be really consistent with them. So at the time of this recording, when I was in Colorado, that's where I was working with the athletes at the Olympic camp. The protests in LA were happening. And I just have to say I'm like, so proud to be from Los Angeles. I'm so proud to be from Los Angeles. And I'm so proud of the way that LA stood up. And I just don't think anybody should be okay with seeing a mother being ripped away from her child. I don't think anybody should be okay with people who have been trying to do it. I say it in quotes, in the right way, be torn apart from their families. It's so disgusting. It's so awful. And I'm so proud to be from Los Angeles to see the way that this city stood up. And, yeah, that's how I'll end this episode. I'm really proud to be. To be from here and to. There's a lot of really good people here. I know sometimes people have a weird relationship with Los Angeles, and I know sometimes this podcast is funny, but not all of the time. These are my intrusive thoughts. Sorry, but it's true. And so, yeah, I'm just. I'm really proud of the way that people stood up and we have to continue to stand up because Donald Trump is a motherfucking idiot. I hate him and I hate that dumb Riley Gaines grifter. Fifth place loser. She's such a loser. I really don't like her. And on that note, I'm not sure when this episode is going to come out, but I'm, you know, getting myself ready for the no Kings protest. I'll, you know, be out there protesting, you know, get out there if you can, but just, you know, everybody keeps standing up. This is. We can't accept this as a new normal. And another thing we can't accept is when baby powder gets kind of in the crooks and crevices of everything you own. Two really completely different things. But, you know, I feel passionately about them both. And I'll use my voice for both. And I will use my voice to say that I think all people deserved to be treated with respect. And I'll also say that to the Johnson and Johnson Company, your mini on the go, baby powders need to have sort of a lock on it so that I don't run into this situation again. Because I don't want to get into a situation where I'm doing a full hour podcast. No voicemails. I. We'll do them next week, I promise. I absolutely. I absolutely promise. Okay, so if you would like to be a voicemail, if you have something to say, we can talk about anything on here. There are no rules, right? There are no rules. It's just. It's you, me, and, you know, in the comfort of wherever you listen to your podcasts. But I would love if you could call and leave a voicemail. It's always so nice to see when people call in, and we always get a ton of voicemails. I'm really grateful for all of them. But if you would like to leave a voicemail, leave another one. If you already have, some people have already left too. Love you guys. If you would like to leave a voicemail, Our number is 310-909-7117. Thank you for calling in if you already have. And if you haven't, don't be scared, right? Don't be scared. Like I was when I opened up Twitter one day and I saw that somebody sent me a picture of their own diarrhea. That's not gonna happen here. This is a safe space, I promise you. No pictures of poo poo anywhere, anywhere here. So if you would like to call the podcast, it's like I said, 310-909-7117. I can't wait to get your voicemail. And until next time, I'm Adam Rippon and this has been Intrusive Thoughts. Sa.