Podcast Summary: The Psychology of Your 20s – Episode 282: Can We Change Our Personality?

Release Date: March 11, 2025

Host: Colleen Witt
Guest: Olga Hazan, Staff Writer at The Atlantic and Author

Introduction

In Episode 282 of The Psychology of Your 20s, host Colleen Witt delves into the intriguing topic of personality change with esteemed journalist and author Olga Hazan. The discussion explores whether our personalities are fixed traits or if they can be deliberately reshaped, particularly during the transformative decade of our twenties.

Background of the Guest

Olga Hazan shares her journey from a high school graduate two decades ago to becoming a prominent writer at The Atlantic. She outlines her path into journalism, highlighting her internship experience and subsequent roles at the Washington Post and The Atlantic. Olga emphasizes her focus on health and human behavior, setting the stage for her exploration into personality modification.

Olga Hazan [04:05]: "I graduated from high school like 20 years ago. Then I went to college. Did not major in journalism, but really found myself drawn to journalism."

The Concept of Changing Personality

The core of the episode revolves around Olga's personal and professional exploration into whether it's possible to alter one's personality. She introduces the idea that personality encompasses our reactions to situations and interactions with the world, influenced by both genetic and environmental factors.

Colleen Witt [05:49]: "Let's talk about personality, whether it's fixed or it can be changed, how it shapes our future, our beliefs, maybe even how happy we are."

The Big Five Personality Traits

Olga discusses the Big Five personality traits—Openness to Experience, Conscientiousness, Extroversion, Agreeableness, and Neuroticism—and their correlation with happiness. She reveals that happy individuals typically score high in all traits except Neuroticism, which is linked to anxiety and depression.

Olga Hazan [13:49]: "The happiest people are like, high in all the traits except for neuroticism."

Olga's Personal Experiment

Determined to enhance her well-being, Olga embarked on a year-long personal experiment to modify her personality traits, specifically targeting Extroversion and Neuroticism.

Increasing Extroversion

To become more extroverted, Olga actively engaged in social activities. She joined improv classes, sailing clubs, and various meetup groups, transitioning from occasional social outings to frequent interactions.

Olga Hazan [28:47]: "Extroversion is, like, very clear cut. Go talk to people. Like, go do activities."

Olga reports that although she initially dreaded these activities, they ultimately led to enjoyable and rewarding experiences, subtly increasing her extroversion without forcing her into extroverted behavior.

Olga Hazan [30:00]: "I do enjoy having fun. I need to sometimes force myself to have fun. But it's okay to do that."

Reducing Neuroticism

To address Neuroticism, Olga incorporated a rigorous meditation practice into her daily routine. She attended a class requiring 45 minutes of meditation each day, focusing on loving-kindness meditation, which emphasizes self-compassion.

Olga Hazan [33:04]: "I meditated a whole lot, and meditation is also something that I did not enjoy."

Despite finding meditation challenging, Olga experienced significant reductions in her anxiety and depression levels. She attributes this improvement to the consistent practice of self-compassion and mindfulness.

Olga Hazan [34:22]: "There's something about repeating that... It made me less afraid of my negative emotions."

Findings and Insights

Olga's experiment underscores that personality is not entirely fixed and can be influenced through deliberate actions and practices. She highlights that both genetic predispositions and environmental factors play roles in shaping our personalities, but intentional efforts can accelerate positive changes.

Olga Hazan [20:32]: "People change throughout their lives, even naturally. Even if you don't really do anything to try to change, your personality is gonna kind of shift from decade to decade."

Impact on Her Life

The changes Olga implemented not only enhanced her extroversion and reduced her neuroticism but also positively influenced her personal life, including her transition into motherhood. These adjustments facilitated stronger social connections and better emotional resilience during the demanding period of having a baby.

Olga Hazan [38:34]: "One example is like just reaching out to other moms. So it's a very stressful time when you first have a baby."

Advice for Listeners

Concluding the episode, Olga offers invaluable advice to listeners navigating their twenties:

Olga Hazan [43:15]: "It's okay to just pursue what you want. You don't have to do something that seems practical or what other people want you to do."

She encourages young adults to focus on their passions and goals, emphasizing that this decade is a pivotal time for personal development and self-discovery.

Conclusion

Episode 282 of The Psychology of Your 20s provides a compelling exploration into the malleability of personality. Through Olga Hazan's personal experiment and insights, listeners gain a deeper understanding of how deliberate actions and mindset shifts can lead to meaningful personality changes, fostering greater happiness and fulfillment during their twenties.

For more insights and to read Olga Hazan's work, visit The Atlantic and check out her book, Me But Better.

Notable Quotes:

• Olga Hazan [04:05]: "I did an internship in journalism and then I went to graduate school after I graduated from college..."

• Colleen Witt [10:34]: "Maybe I'm like, are introverts less happy?"

• Olga Hazan [20:32]: "People change throughout their lives, even naturally."

• Colleen Witt [35:52]: "Meditation sounds like discipline towards your soul."

• Olga Hazan [43:15]: "It's okay to just pursue what you want."

Stay tuned to The Psychology of Your 20s for more deep dives into the psychological facets that shape our lives during this pivotal decade.