980 | Better This Week: Your Summer

Summary

Podcast Summary: The Rachel Hollis Podcast

Episode: 980 | Better This Week: Your Summer

Date: July 8, 2026

Host: Rachel Hollis

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Episode Overview

In this episode of her “Better This Week” series, Rachel Hollis dives into making the most of your summer — no matter your circumstances or what life season you’re in. She blends personal anecdotes, practical advice, humor, and science-backed tips on setting intentions, savoring small moments, and creating meaningful experiences. This episode inspires listeners to stop postponing joy and start living their ideal summer now, without waiting for a “perfect” moment or big vacation.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Embracing the Season You’re In

• [00:58–04:40] Rachel begins by normalizing the challenge of summer, especially for parents of young children, people facing life transitions, or those for whom summer doesn't align with idyllic expectations.
  • “Not everybody's summer is going to be easy, breezy, beautiful covergirl. Sometimes something’s going on in life…Whatever is happening for you is your reality.”
    — Rachel, [01:34]
• Acknowledges social media pressure to have a “perfect” summer.
• Empowers listeners to give themselves grace and adapt their expectations.

2. Setting an Intention for Summer

• [04:50–08:15] Instead of seeing summer as a destination (“once work is done,” or “after vacation”), Rachel urges listeners to see it as a season to be lived right now.
  • “The best summer ever…is all about intention. It’s not about having a million dollars…It is about setting the intention that you are going to do what you can to make this time of year special.”
    — Rachel, [03:29]
• Tips on reflecting what you want this summer to feel like: more relaxed, productive, fun, romantic?
• Encourages the practice of intention through each season of the year, not just summer.

3. Creating a Practical Summer Bucket List

• [08:15–19:13] Rachel champions the idea of a "summer bucket list" — not as a chore, but as an anchor to your intentions.
  • “A bucket list for the summer is actually really smart. It’s not about adding a bunch of things to your plate, but we go back to that intention that we set right?”
    — Rachel, [09:00]
• The “bucket list” is adapted to your resources and life — it’s not about lavish vacations or big spending.
• Ideas for the Summer Bucket List:
  1. One Great Reservation: Find and try the best of something you love to eat locally.
     • Rachel shares her method — researching restaurants online, looking beyond Instagram-able spots, and making the meal an event.
     • “Having a hobby of trying all the turkey sandwiches in a 20 mile radius. So fun, right?”
       — Rachel, [13:31]
  2. Tourist in Your Own Town: Approach your local area like you’re on vacation — visit museums, parks, or shops you normally overlook.
     • “Make traveling locally in your community as exciting as going on a vacation…What does it look like to shake things up?”
       — Rachel, [22:18]
  3. Host a Dinner Party (or Happy Hour): Foster community by inviting friends, neighbors, coworkers, or family — don’t let perfectionism stop you.
     • Rachel recounts a spontaneous, imperfect, but joy-filled evening with friends.
     • “The only way we get [the lost art of entertaining at home] back is that you stop being so hard on yourself…and you just start hosting.”
       — Rachel, [25:25]

4. The Science of Memory & Creating Meaningful Moments

• [31:18–35:12] Rachel discusses the psychological insight that we remember the best parts and the ending of experiences, not the everyday grind or minor hardships.
  • “People do not remember every part of an experience. They remember the best part…and how the experience ended.”
    — Rachel, [32:29]
• To make a “great summer,” intentionally craft a few memorable peaks and meaningful endings.
• Encourage actively manufacturing “memory makers”—bucket list items, rituals, or little adventures that stand out.

5. Romanticizing the Ordinary

• [35:12–41:00] Rachel champions “romanticizing your life” — the act of appreciating and adding intention to small, everyday moments, regardless of your circumstances.
  • “The moment is only romantic if you decide that it is…You decide that you are going to make your regular life something that feels more beautiful.”
    — Rachel, [38:18]
• Examples: drinking coffee from a favorite mug, buying fresh flowers, making lunch special, enjoying a drive with the windows down and good music.

6. Actionable Recap

• [41:00–42:12] Rachel offers a condensed to-do list for listeners:

  • Make a reservation: Book a meal out — alone or with company.

  • Research local tourism: Find a new place or experience in your own area.

  • Host people: Organize a get-together, however small or casual.

  • Romanticize something small: Find one ritual to savor intentionally.

  • “Look, summer is not a destination. Summer is a season and it is not going to wait for you to be ready. If you don’t embrace summer while it’s here, all of a sudden it’s autumn and then it’s winter. You get to decide how intentional you are about each season of your life, and it really is worth the effort.”
    — Rachel, [41:57]

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• “Stop thinking that you’re gonna get to someday. If you want to enjoy summer, you start right now, today.”
  — [Rachel Hollis, 05:21]

• “A summer bucket list... Not quite so morbid. Just a bunch of stuff that you would like to accomplish during the summer.”
  — [Rachel, 09:25]

• “Some of the best food I’ve ever had in my life came off a food truck or total hole in the wall. But I wouldn’t have been able to try that food if I didn’t do my research.”
  — [Rachel, 21:30]

• “There is a real lost art in entertaining in the home. I feel like that has been so lost generationally…people just want to be together in community.”
  — [Rachel, 25:22 / 28:58]

• “The beauty of this experience is that if you figure out how to do this for summer, we can do this again in the autumn...it's such a beautiful way to go through the cycles of your life.”
  — [Rachel, 08:08]

• “Romanticizing your life does not require more money...all it requires is your intention.”
  — [Rachel, 39:30]

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Timestamps for Key Segments

• [00:58–04:40] – Acknowledging Different Summer Realities & Giving Yourself Grace
• [04:50–08:15] – Setting Intentions for Your Season/Life
• [08:15–19:13] – Summer Bucket List Mindset & Specific Ideas
• [19:13–22:01] – The Joy (& Reality) of Food Adventures
• [22:03–30:15] – Being a Tourist at Home / Hosting Imperfect Gatherings
• [31:18–35:12] – Science of Memory & Creating Peak Moments
• [35:12–41:00] – Romanticizing Your Daily Life
• [41:00–42:18] – Simple, Actionable Checklist & Final Encouragement

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Tone and Style

Rachel maintains her signature mix of relatable, upbeat, and empowering language throughout. She shares personal stories with self-effacing humor (“Don’t roll your eyes at me,” “I know it’s bougie, but whatever – this is my truth!”) and speaks as a supportive big sister, encouraging listeners to do what works for their unique life.

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Final Takeaway

Rachel’s ultimate message:
“Go be romantic. I love you and I’m rooting for you.”
— [Rachel Hollis, 42:11]

Summer isn’t something you wait for — it’s something you intentionally create, right where you are, with whatever capacity and circumstances you have. Small rituals, local adventures, and intentional memory-making can turn any summer into “the best summer ever.”

Transcript

[Rachel Hollis]

This episode is brought to you by Peacock and the new original series the Five Star Weekend. Jennifer Garner stars as Hollis Shaw, a famed cook who invites her best friends to Nantucket after a devastating loss changes her life. Based on the best selling novel by Ellen Hildebrand, this A list ensemble also stars Darcy Cardin, Gemma Chan, Regina hall and chloe Sevigny. The five star weekend is streaming July 9th only on Peacock.

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[Rachel Hollis]

Muscle Milk Protein for All I absolutely love summertime. It is my favorite time of the year. We look forward to it all school year long. But real talk, that is something that I experience now that my kids are older. I remember when they were little that I would see all of these things on Pinterest or Facebook back in the day of like having the best summer ever. And I remember my my sister in law was always talking about how much she loved when the kids were out of school and how much she loved being at home. And I remember thinking like is something wrong with me? Because this is hard to go from having your little kids who go to school during certain hours or even preschool for half the day to suddenly not having them in a school. Structure was really hard for me and I want to start today's episode by saying that if you are in a season that makes sense summer difficult. It is really helpful to just acknowledge that not everybody's summer is going to be easy, breezy, beautiful covergirl. Okay, sometimes something's going on in life or maybe you have a new baby, or maybe you just started a brand new job and it's pretty intense. Whatever is happening for you is your reality. And sometimes the reality of July and August doesn't line up with the cookouts and the beach days and the hot girl summer that you see all over the Internet. If that's you, let's start by being graceful. We're still gonna find a workaround. Okay? Now if that's not you, if you find yourself in a place where you've got a little bit more capacity, maybe you have some more resources, maybe like me, your Kids are older and so summer's not quite so difficult. Let's do this. Let's make this the best summer ever. Don't roll your eyes at me, okay? The best summer ever, the best Christmas ever, the best Tuesday ever, is all about intention. It's not about having a million dollars or your friend owns a home in the Hamptons, or you get to go to Disneyland. It is about setting the intention that you are going to do what you can to make this time of year special. And for the first time in my life, I live in a place where the seasons are really intense. So I moved from California, specifically Los Angeles, to New York State, specifically the Hudson Valley. It's about two hours north of New York City. I live out in the country, and I moved here at the end of December. So for the first time in my life, I moved to a place where there was snow and not just a little snow. The locals tell me that this was the most intense winter that this area had seen for over a decade. So it was very regularly below freezing. It was icy roads, we had tons of snow days. I never experienced it before, so I thought it was super fun. But on the other side of this very intense winter and then a pretty long kind of coming of spring, we find our ourselves inside of summer. And I keep thinking about how this is my favorite time of year and how all of these super fun things go into this time of year for my family. And so I thought for today's episode of Better this Week, we could talk about how you make your summer better this week. How do you make the next couple of months way funner, way more enjoyable, way more intentional than maybe you ever have before. I bet it is not as difficult as you think it is. Give me 25 minutes is, and let me pitch you on the things that you can do to enjoy the summer more than you ever have before. All right, so the first thing that we're going to do as a team, as a crew, as a squad, to make this summer better is right now, today, you are going to make a decision that there is no quote unquote, official start date of your summertime. So the tendency is to think, you know, once we get to vacation or once we get to go to the beach or once we get out to the lake, or once the kids are done with summer school, once that project wraps, once we get through the end of June, like, we can just keep piling all of these things one on top of another that make summer. I'm using air quotes. You can't see me. But they make our summer this, like, destination that we're trying to get to instead of understanding that it's something we're part of right now. I woke up this morning, and I took my daughter to a math tutoring session at her school. It is summertime. There are no kids at that school. There's teachers, there's faculty. There's Noah's math tutor and me sitting in the lobby editing my new book. And I'm sitting there working, and I'm thinking about the fact that when I was younger, like, before I ever had kids, it never occurred to me that part of my summer time would be taking my kid back to school so she can work on her math. In fact, this was Noah's third tutoring session this week. So we've been at school every single morning, even though school is not actually in session. So I could look at that and go, wow, Noah's still in school. She still has tutoring every day. Let us get through these tutoring sessions. And then on the other side of that, then I'll feel like it's summertime. But right now, today, the birds are chirping. You can maybe even hear them. Even though my windows are closed in my office, like, you can hear the birds. It's sunny and beautiful, and. And we could go play outside. We could go lay in the sun. We could go watch Noah swim in the pool. Obviously, I'm not going to get my hair wet, but she could, you know, we could choose to do things with the latter half of our day, even though the first part was still grounded in school. My point in all of this is that you have a full day and a full week inside of this summer experience. And you need to remember that summer. Summer is a season. And I know I use that term all the time, like you're in a season of life, but in this case, I literally mean summer is a season. There are weather patterns that happen in your neck of the woods. There's whatever's going on with the sunshine. If you got some, you have different seasonal weather patterns this time of year than you do any other time. Hopefully, you got a little bit more freedom. If you have kids, maybe they're out of school. If you work for a company that has summer hours, we just typically have some different energy this time of year. And you have to start by taking advantage of it. Stop thinking that you're gonna get to someday, someday when this, someday when that. If you want to enjoy summer, you start right now, today. You choose to see this as A season, and you set your intention for what you want this season to be. Let's decide that right now. I want you to think about it. Do you want this summer to feel more relaxed? Is that what your spirit is calling for right now? You want to come out the other side of the summer and feel calmer and more grounded? Do you want this summer to feel productive? You know, maybe you get super turned on by the idea everybody else is chilling out. You're like, ooh, I'm going to lap these suckers. This is my time to be super productive. Maybe it's easier for you if your kids are out of school and you're going to use this time to work on some personal projects or build something around the house. Is this a season that you want to have fun? Do you want to have more fun? I want to have more fun this summer. That's a big one for me. Decide what it is, and then you can build structure that helps you to call those things into your life. But if you just go through the motions, if you just sort of, like, go along with it, you're going to snap your fingers. It's going to be fall, and. And you will not have had the summer that you wanted. The beauty of this experience is that if you figure out how to do this for summer, we can do this again in the autumn. We can set our intention for autumn. Then we can set our intention for winter. It's such a beautiful way to go through the cycles of your life by setting the mood and setting the intention for what you want it to be. We are going to decide today. We don't even need a week for this. We're going to decide today. We're going to. What our intention is for the next couple of months. All right? My second thing that we're going to do again, we could do this today or at some point in the next week, is a summer bucket list. I know. Before you roll your eyes at me, I know that bucket lists are cheesy. I know that this is something that we bloggers were doing 15 years ago. But hear me out, okay? Because a bucket list for the summer is actually really smart. It's not about adding a bunch of things to your plate, but we go back to that intention that we set right? Whether it was that you wanted to feel calm or you wanted to have more fun or you wanted to feel super romantic with your partner, you decide in advance what you want your summer to feel like, and then you create these anchors that will help make that feeling real. A Bucket list traditionally was like, these are all the things that I want to do in life before I quote, kick the bucket. That's what the bucket list is, a summer bucket list. Not quite so morbid. Just a bunch of stuff that you would like to accomplish during the summer. So here are some categories that you can think about for your summer bucket list that do not involve the big, fancy, schmancy vacation. Because that's where everyone goes, right? You're like, it's summertime. I want to go to Paris. I love that for you. If it's in your plans, oh, my gosh. Have so much fun. Eat crepes, eat 20,000 croissants. Send me pictures. But not everybody has the ability to travel this summer. But taking a vacation in the summer is not the standard of whether or not you're going to have a great time. So here are some things that you can think about for your bucket list that maybe you haven't done yet that I think you'll like. And it's worth saying real quick that these are based on things that I like. So if you hear this idea and you think it's dumb, well, you just pick something else. Sally. All right, number one. At least one great reservation. One great reservation. I love to eat. It is my favorite hobby in the entire world. If you ask, like, okay, you have a month and there are no kids, it's you and Kez. What are you doing? We are traveling. Cause we don't get to do that when the kids are home. But that travel is built around the food we are eating. We love food. It's also why we love to cook, because we love to eat. Have you considered one great reservation? What this looks like for me is researching. So maybe there's something in your city or your town that everybody talks about, you've always wanted to try. If something immediately popped into your head, that is where you can aim at. But I find that I have a lot more fun if I do research. And I actually kind of have to work for the reservation. So. So what that looks like for me is maybe I want to know what is the best fajitas within a 50 mile radius. Okay. I used to do this in Austin all the time until I found the best fajitas, which are at the pool restaurant at the Proper in downtown Austin. The pool restaurant is called La Pesina. If you've never had the fajitas at La Pecina, go ahead and thank me later, all right? But I do this. I find a favorite food and then I go, you Know, I want to know the best I can get in my area. So I start doing research. I go on Yelp, I look at food bloggers, I go on Eater, I look at lists and then I sort of go through, I look at pictures of the food on Yelp. And here's the other key. You want to also look at pictures not that the restaurant uploaded, but that real people uploaded. Even though the lighting is going to be crap and it's probably not going to look that good. You can tell. Like, for instance, I grew up in Southern California. Mexican food is my favorite. I have been eating it my whole life. I can go onto a restaurant, Mexican food, whether it's like super high end or like a food truck, whatever it is, those of us who love Mexican food, like real Mexican food, can go on and see a picture and look at the beans or the rice and immediately go, absolutely not. You know what I mean? Like those. Some of you just chuckled right now because you know exactly what. There's just a certain look. You're like, this is. These are. This is not authentic. I do not want this. It's important that you look not just at the marketing that that restaurant has pulled together, but what real people said and real people took pictures of you. Spend a little extra time, guys, you're going to have the meal of your life. Okay? So you can start by what's your favorite food and then identifying something you would like to try that's supposed to be the best that there is. I am a huge fan of a turkey sandwich. I love a turkey. I know it's so random, but I do spend quite a lot of time if I'm in an area, I need to know where the best turkey sandwich is. And I'll tell you right now. The best that I have found since moving to the Hudson Valley is a place called Rossi and Sons, where it is an Italian deli. It is so good. Oh, I can't. It's so. I mean, I'm really excited because Saturday is feast day and on Saturday I got big plans with myself to go sit at Rossi and Sons and just devour a turkey sandwich. But I found that sandwich through this method. I looked on all the lists, I saw pictures, and then I went and started to try things. Having a hobby of trying all the turkey sandwiches in a 20 mile radius. So fun, right? Trying to find the best burger, trying to find the best chow mein, trying to find the best steak. Like whatever you're into, start and see what you can find. That's number one. This show is sponsored by BetterHelp. I am a recovering people pleaser. I spent most of my childhood learning that in order to be loved, I needed to make sure everybody liked me. And for some of us who have childhoods rooted in trauma, it goes way deeper than just being nice or just being kind or just being a good girl. And it becomes about this feeling of safety that is something I really had to learn to unlearn. And I can't imagine navigating my adult life, especially in the last 15 years, without the help of a therapist to guide me through that process. I remember going to therapy probably 10 or 15 years ago and thinking I was there to talk about stress or anxiety. But when we really uncovered the root cause of the stress and anxiety, it was about feeling like my in laws didn't like me. Sounds sort of frivolous and ridiculous, but for a lot of people, that kind of thing can destroy our days. So I had to learn. And I really am so grateful for my therapist for guiding me through that process. If you have never considered all of the different ways that a therapist can help you navigate these sort of stigmas in your life, these things that you struggle with and don't really know a resolution for, you should check out BetterHelp. There is a reason that I have been partnered with them here on the show for years. BetterHelp is the number one online therapy. It's the world's largest therapy platform. And you can find space to slow down and talk to someone who is just there for you. They have no idea or context about all the other people in your life. They're just helping you work through your stuff. You take a short questionnaire and it helps you to identify a therapist at Better Help. That would work really well for you. And the great thing is, if for some reason you try that therapist out and you don't totally dig them, that's cool. You can find another one really easily. Don't let stigma stand in the way of support. Start therapy with BetterHelp. Sign up and get 10% off at betterhelp.com Rach that's better. H E L p.com Rach Awkward time

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[Rachel Hollis]

number two this is going to be a little bougie but whatever. This is my truth. Kez and I love to eat at Michelin star restaurants. It is like super special occasion for us but we do it often during the summer because that's the only time of year that we're able to go and have like an elaborate four hour meal. We got to go to one last year in Iceland which was amazing. The year before we went to one in Spain which like I will remember for the rest of my life. I wish I could remember what it was called but I will tell you it was absolutely unbelievable. This summer we're going to Italy and we have our reservation already booked. And then also this summer we are going to Blue Hill at Stone Barns which I have heard like seven different chefs on different shows say is their number one restaurant in America. So it's like this really famous restaurant in New York state. So we have reservations for that. We're so excited and I have to tell you you're like girl, stop talking about reservations. No See how excited it makes me. If you don't like food, find your version of this. But my like I I could spend my entire summer and just once a month get to go try a new food and be pump about it real. One more thing about my Blue Hill reservation took me four months to get it. So some of these great restaurants, their reservations open up one day a month and on that day you either get your reservation in the morning or you're not going. So I have been trying for four months and I finally got a resy and I'm so excited but that is One of my things. And if it's not something you've ever considered, maybe this is the summer that you get into your foodie era, and it just starts by following what you're already into and then finding options for places that do that really well. They do not have to be fancy. Some of the best food I've ever had in my life came off a food truck or total hole in the wall. But I wouldn't have been able to try that food if I didn't do my research. I'm going to add one more caveat to this. Do not use social media as your standard for whether or not you should try a spot. I said it. And someone listening to this who's 25 is like, what? I want to go to that place that, like, all the Instagrammers are, you know, do. No, you can. But then that experience is more about you going and taking a picture of the food than the food actually being good. And if that is your goal for the summer, if you want to have an influencer summer and you want everyone to see that, you got that milkshake with 42 things stacked on top of it, and it makes a really cool photo for your reel.

[T-Mobile Advertiser 2]

Cool.

[Rachel Hollis]

But most of the time, those things that are really iconic because they're visually pretty and they have a line around the block aren't worth the time and effort to fight through the crowds to get the thing. That place is not necessarily about the quality of the food. That's just your advice from big sister. All right, second thing that you can do for your summer bucket list, Become a tourist in your own town. This is one of my favorites and one of the most underutilized things on everybody's bucket list, because you think you know everything that your town has to offer. There are so many things that locals never do. Right? What is the museum that you went to on every field trip when you were a little kid and now you're 50? And it would be kind of fun to go back to the Farm Machinery Museum, right? What's a historic neighborhood that you could go take a walk through and look at old homes? Is there a state park within two hours from where you live? Is there a waterfall that everybody has pictures of and you never really went because you're like, well, I don't really care. Maybe this is the time. Pick some local destinations this summer and approach them with the same energy that you would going on a vacation. Like, make traveling locally in your community as exciting as going on a vacation. I know you're like, what Are you talking about, like, it's not as. Yeah, but you could approach it with that energy. If you're going to Hawaii, right? You don't normally go to Hawaii. You get to go to Hawaii. You're like, where am I going to eat? What am I going to do? Is there a cute little shop where we can get some ice cream? What if you approached your own town through that lens? Because we get into these ruts where we go to the same places over and over and over. What does it look like to shake things up? Yes, I know you love that ice cream shop you've been going for years, but just for the heck of it, what if you try the froyo place that's down by the water and then you guys can take a walk and it's just a different thing for your brain to experience than what you've been doing so far. Maybe you take a road trip. You get a bunch of snacks, you play some great music, you take photos, you chat with your partner, you chat with your kids if they're old enough that a road trip wouldn't be annoying. Let's be real. But what can you do without having to spend a ton of money where you can just add some fun experiences to the life you are already living? Third bucket list item. Not everyone's going to feel comfortable with this. Host a dinner party. Yep. Host a dinner party. If hosting a dinner party freaks you out, consider hosting a dinner party where everyone brings stuff. Say, I'm gonna do, you know, steak on the grill, because I know how to do that. Can everybody else bring side dishes? Right. If that scares you too, host a happy hour. I'm gonna put out some cheese and some nuts. We're going to have some bubbly on ice. I think there is a real lost art in entertaining in the home. I feel like that has been so lost generationally. And the only way that we get this back is that you stop being so hard on yourself and you stop being such a perfectionist and you stop thinking that people need it to be a certain way in order to come to your house. You stop buying into that and you just start hosting. Start with friends that you feel the most comfortable with. Or if you're like, well, I don't really have any friends that want to come over. Invite a co worker over. Like, find a reason. There's something so fun about going to someone's home, and I just. I want to encourage you to do it. Invite people you love. You could even order food if you don't feel good. Cooking on your own, but it allows you to get, you know, get outside. If you got some patio furniture, let's use that patio furniture. The kids can run around, someone brings some wine. Suddenly it's like 10 o' clock and the stars are out and nobody wants to leave. You create that. That is the summer memories that we're all asp. Like, I. I don't know anyone who doesn't want a night like that. We actually had a night like that last night. And it's worth mentioning because it is so the opposite of what we are known for when it comes to entertaining. So we have some friends here in our new neighborhood that we sort of became friends with right away. And we invited them over pretty quickly after we had moved here. And we love them and we have so much fun with them. And they come over and it just so happens that every time they've come over, Kez has made like, some elaborate. You know, he spent three days making croissants. Or, you know, we'll put together like a beautiful cheese board with way too much food. We just. They are used to coming to our house and just such opulent entertaining. And we have so much fun. And we drink bubbles and it's a vibe. Well, we had been wanting to play tennis with them. The house that we are renting has a tennis court. I know. I told you guys, it's so bougie, you can't even handle it. Never had a tennis court at my house in my life, obviously. And we've been playing out as a family. It's been so much fun. But these particular friends, he used to be a tennis coach, so he's really good at tennis. And they both love sports. And we were like, oh, it'd be so fun. You guys want to come over and play tennis? Yes. We're gonna have a doubles tournament. I say, okay, you can come over at 4 and we can play tennis. And then it just works right into happy hour. Or you can flip it and you can come over after dinner and we'll play sort of in the evening. We'll work off our dinner, and they're like, we'll come over at 4 and we'll go into happy hour. And they came over yesterday. We had so much fun. Like, I am so pumped because you don't. As an adult at least, I don't often have new friends who you can play with. I'm so forever searching for this concept of play. I think as a parentified child, play wasn't something that I ever really got as a child. And so I search for it in my adult life. It's not easy for me to play, but I know that it's very important, not just for my inner child, but also for how I parent. So they came over yesterday and we're just like laughing our butts off, basically. Only the husband in this other couple is great at tennis. All the rest of us are just struggling. But the struggle was hilarious and everybody had good vibes and good energy. We had a great time. Afterwards, we come inside to have a drink, which was the plan. And of course it just keeps going on and on until we realize that while we had made food for our children, like we did not plan to make dinner for them. So I'm like grabbing things out. Like we have like tortilla chips and like nuts and random chia and. But we're like making random snacks for them just of what we already had on hand. But we weren't planning to entertain. So it was like so opposite of what they're used to with us. And I thought, man, there is a beauty in this because this experience is just about us hanging out as friends. Nobody's trying to impress anybody. Nobody needs to be impressed. Everyone's just super happy to be together, happy with whatever we've got. It ended up being such a fun night. And as someone who tends to try and like, make the hosting experience so big and beautiful and impressive, it was a good reminder for me that people just want to be together in community. So maybe consider having some friends over as part of your bucket list.

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[Rachel Hollis]

With my Sapphire Preferred card, we earned three times the points on gas, online, grocery and dining. It was amazing. Chase Sapphire Perfect Preferred the card that's preferred for a reason. Cards issued by JP Morgan, Chase bank and a member FDIC subject to credit approval terms apply. All right, those are just a few of my ideas based on my favorite things to do. You are going to have your own version of it, but maybe today or tomorrow you sit down with your journal and you just think of some things that would really appeal to you. Do you want to find a patio bar where you can go listen to some live music? Do you want to go roller skating? Do you want to spend some time near the water? Like, what are things that you can put on a list that once you see them, they will anchor you toward the type of summer that you want to have? Okay, the next thing that you're going to do to make this summer the best summer you've ever had legitimately, not just hyperbole, not me being dramatic, but actually there's some science to back up what I am about to say. The thing that makes this summer incredible is your memory of this summer. That's what makes things great, is the memories we have of the experiences that we went through. And there is science now that tells us that people do not remember every part of an experience. They remember the best part of the experience and they remember how the experience ended. They don't remember all the hard stuff in between. They don't necessarily remember all the moments that were like, good but not great. They remember the best bits and then how it ended. There was actually a book on this years ago. I cannot remember what it's called, but it was something I read as an entrepreneur which talked about the idea that people experience your brand or your business through that same lens. They experience what was the best thing that happened and also how did it end? And they tell you the how did it end part because they're encouraging you to think that if someone remembers the best moment, they naturally would also remember the worst. Unless it ends better than that worst moment, in which case they just are focusing on best moment and the ending. If you think about going to an amusement park, have you ever Been to an amusement park where you had a fantastic time. Think of maybe taking your kids to Disney if you've ever gotten to do that. Or maybe you went to Disney. Think of being at Disney, and your memories are so special. So, so special. But if I actually challenged you, I'd be like, yeah, but can you remember when you waited in line for the teacups for two hours in the blazing sun? Can you remember when that little kid threw up right before you were gonna get your chance to take a picture with Mickey? And then you didn't get to take your picture with Mickey. Can you remember how you went and got chicken strips and it cost you $47 per strip? Do you remember those moments? And you're like, oh, my gosh, you're right. Yeah, those moments were there, but we don't automatically go to them unless it just got worse and worse. And then we ended the day and we were like, this place sucks. Right? But if we had these, like, beautiful memories and we left and we got our churro and we saw, you know, the electric light parade. I'm. I'm dating myself right now. But we saw all of these things and. And then we walked out. We were so happy. We got one of those pins that we had a Mickey head from the gift shop on the way out. If you've had an experience like that, it doesn't mean there were parts of it that didn't suck. It just means you focus on the good stuff. This summer is the same way we wanna think of things that you can create. These memories that you can create that are gonna feel really good, that are gonna make you so happy. Instead of sort of going through the next couple months, you can't even really remember what happened because you're just going through kind of the monotony of life. Sometimes those beautiful moments, they just sneak up on us. Sometimes you have to manufacture them. You have to actually try to have moments where you can experience those great things. That's why the bucket list is so powerful. That's why I love to plan a beautiful dinner for my husband and I. Because if I don't plan it, it's not like it's gonna just magically appear. Yeah, maybe our friends will be like, hey, guys, we're going to a great restaurant this weekend. You wanna come? Maybe. But why would I leave something like that to chance? I just feel like so many of us work so hard. Life is challenging. We got to take care of the kids and ourselves. Maybe you're trying to get through college. Maybe you're trying to take care of aging parents, or you're going through perimenopause, you're going through a divorce. Like, whatever you're going through, it's hard. Can we also be intentional about looking for things that are going to be real memory makers that we can cling to when we get to the end of this summer and someone goes, what'd you do this summer? You're like, oh, these 10 things. To that point, I'm also going to add a little beat in here to romanticize your life. I know this is such a social media trend, the idea of romanticizing something, but I honestly don't understand a life that isn't romanticized. I really don't get it. I. I sort of wonder if you're not romanticizing your life. Is it just that your life is so great that it doesn't need anything? Because, you know, if you just, like, don't. If you don't care about anything. Right. I'm just trying to think of the things that I do to romanticize my life. I drink my coffee out of the same mug every single morning. It's my favorite. It has chips in it. I've had to glue the handle on, like, three times. But it's my mug. I sit down, I journal in my notebook. I look out the window. I'm very, like, romantic about all of these rituals. That's the same ritual as millions and millions of other people drinking coffee. But because in my mind, it's special because I'm drinking it out of my special mug, you know, and I'm gonna look out the window, and I'm gonna see the birds. Like, I make it romantic in my mind. It's not like it just magically is romantic. I don't understand why we wouldn't do that. The key with romanticizing your life is understanding that the moment is only romantic if you decide that it is. Driving home with your windows down and a little Fleetwood Mac playing on the radio, right? Deciding to buy some fresh flowers at the grocery store, putting them on the kitchen table or by the kitchen sink as a little gift to you. You know, having something for your lunch that you take to the office, but you actually really want to eat it. Putting a little extra time into making that lunch for yourself so that when you get there, you're like, ooh, today I added the cilantro, and I added some, you know, pickled jalapeno. Like, I really made this more interesting than it usually is. The beauty of feeling more romantic about your days is that it does not require more money. It really doesn't. It does not require that you go on a vacation. All it requires is your intention. You decide that you are going to make your regular life something that feels more beautiful, something that feels like it's worth savoring. And I really think that when you decide this, you feel something shift. Because when you decide to make today romantic, you stop waiting for someday. Like you don't need it to be a month from now. You don't need it to be something else. You're like, I'm gonna make this day as romantic as I possibly can. Summer is the perfect time to practice this because I feel like summer is already pretty romantic if you pay attention to what's going on. We have longer evenings depending on where you live in the world. Warmer days, everything slows down a bit. You have permission to be outside more. Hopefully you work for a place where your hours are more generous in the summer and you're able to slow down and let all of that in. To recap how you can make your summer the best summer ever, here's a few things that you can do this week. Number one, Make a reservation. Make a reservation. Ask someone if they want to go to dinner with you. If you don't have anybody, go by yourself. Nothing funner than going to dinner and people watching someone. Someone just threw up in their mouth. They're like, that sounds like my nightmare. Go sit at the bar, then talk to the bartender, talk to the sushi chef. Like find a way to go to dinner if you love food where you can go by yourself. We don't have to feel weird about it. But make one reservation this week. Number two, do some research on how you can be a tourist in your own town or how you can take a day trip from where you currently live and go explore something you haven't normally done. Number three, plan to have people over. Figure out what you are going to host, that you're going to have your friends or family over and you're going to have a little party. And it doesn't have to be some big high end thing. You don't have to be Martha Stewart, you just are creating an opportunity for community. Lastly, pick something small that you are going to start romanticizing. Your drive to work, your coffee in the morning, maybe it's coming home after work, taking a great shower, putting on your pajamas. What is something that you can do? Very simple, that's gonna make your days feel a bit more present and a bit more like a celebration of you. Look, summer is not a destination. Summer is a season and it is not going to wait for you to be ready if you don't embrace summer while it's here. All of a sudden it's autumn and then it's winter. You get to decide how intentional you are about each season of your life, and it really is worth the effort. This has been an episode in my new series, Better this Week. I'm Rachel Hollis. Go be romantic. I love you and I'm rooting for you. The rachel hollis podcast is produced by me, rachel hollis. It's edited by andrew weller and jack no noble.

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