12th Anniversary Live Show - Live From The Beacon Theater

Summary

Summary of "The Read" 12th Anniversary Live Show - Live From The Beacon Theater

Episode Title: 12th Anniversary Live Show - Live From The Beacon Theater
Release Date: February 20, 2025
Hosts: Kid Fury and Crissle
Publisher: Loud Speakers Network

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Introduction: Celebrating 12 Years of The Read

The 12th Anniversary Live Show of The Read podcast was a vibrant and energetic event held at the Beacon Theater in New York City. Hosts Kid Fury and Crissle kicked off the evening by thanking their sponsor, Nissan, and extending gratitude to their dedicated listeners, affectionately referred to as the "Read Life." The atmosphere was a blend of humor, sharp commentary, and heartfelt reflections on the podcast's journey over the past twelve years.

Notable Quote:

Kid Fury: "The Read Life. The Read Life. The Read Life."
[01:11]

Opening Banter and Personal Anecdotes

Kid Fury and Crissle engaged in playful banter, sharing personal stories and humorous takes on everyday experiences. Crissle recounted a humorous incident about falling out in church, highlighting the duo's knack for turning personal mishaps into entertaining narratives.

Notable Quote:

Crissle: "I started just speaking gibberish and said oh Lord and fell out and somebody came and covered me up."
[01:36]

Black Excellence Segment

Transitioning to a more celebratory tone, the hosts introduced the "Black Excellence" segment. They highlighted significant achievements within the Black community, starting with Kendrick Lamar's halftime show performance, which broke Michael Jackson's long-standing viewership record.

Notable Quote:

Kid Fury: "The halftime show drew in 133.5 million viewers. This is more than the football game which had an average of 126 million."
[07:35]

The hosts also gave a special mention to Morgan Price, Fisk University’s first HBCU gymnast to score a perfect 10, celebrating her dedication and the historical significance of her achievement.

Notable Quote:

Kid Fury: "Morgan Price is Fisk's university's first HBCU gymnast to score a perfect 10... I wanted to be a part of history and inspire younger girls who want to attend an HBCU as well."
[16:05]

Hot Box Segment

Renaming their traditional "Hot Tops" to "Hot Box," the hosts delved into various pop culture topics with their signature blend of humor and critique. Topics ranged from TikTok's temporary ban and its impact on users to the dynamics of celebrity relationships and controversies.

Notable Quote:

Crissle: "You can't be without TikTok for three and a half weeks. I feel like that's a problem."
[19:21]

They also discussed the Super Bowl game, expressing strong opinions about the performance of the Kansas City Chiefs versus the Philadelphia Eagles, reflecting their passion for sports analysis intertwined with cultural commentary.

Notable Quote:

Kid Fury: "The Eagles of Philadelphia took home the winning honor of being super bowl champion. They did a super bowl licking indeed."
[11:31]

Audience Q&A: Engaging with Fans

The live show featured an interactive Q&A session where audience members posed questions ranging from personal advice to pop culture inquiries. Highlights included discussions on navigating career challenges, managing personal relationships, and understanding complex cultural phenomena.

Notable Quotes:

Crystal: "Keep your heart three stacks. Keep your heart."
[75:57]

Kid Fury: "Be where your feet are. Where are your feet? Right here in this moment."
[76:00]

Controversial Topics and Sharp Commentary

Throughout the event, Kid Fury and Crissle tackled contentious issues with their unabashed opinions. Topics included legal battles involving celebrities, societal expectations, and the complexities of professional and personal life intersections.

Notable Quote:

Crissle: "Crystal, listen, you let me know when I can speak bitch, because I already know you can read on this."
[84:40]

Closing Remarks and Future Plans

As the evening drew to a close, Kid Fury and Crissle reflected on the growth of The Read and shared their excitement for future projects. Kid Fury announced his upcoming podcast, "Furious Thoughts," while Crissle discussed her journey through motherhood and encouraged listeners to stay authentic amidst societal pressures.

Notable Quote:

Kid Fury: "Furious Thoughts is coming to you in a couple of months as its own podcast in the vein of late night talk and fuckery that you might not expect in that realm."
[82:07]

Final Message: Advocacy and Support

In their heartfelt finale, the hosts dedicated their closing remarks to those who treat others with respect and understanding, especially regarding mental health. They emphasized the importance of empathy, community support, and personal growth.

Notable Quote:

Kid Fury: "Those of you who use the mentally struggling or ill people around you as a way to try and fortify some weird, self-diagnosed, self-instructed feeling of oh, I'm a good person... Don’t open your mouth to try and fix to judge the next motherfucker who's being open about how they're feeling or what they're struggling with."
[88:27]

Conclusion: A Night to Remember

The 12th Anniversary Live Show of The Read was a testament to the podcast's enduring legacy and its impact on listeners. Kid Fury and Crissle seamlessly blended humor, cultural critique, and personal stories, creating an engaging and memorable experience for all attendees and listeners alike. As they look forward to the future, the duo remains committed to celebrating Black culture, addressing societal issues, and fostering a supportive community through their influential platform.

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Note: All timestamps are indicative and correspond to the provided transcript.

Transcript

[Kid Fury]

Threed's 12th anniversary is fueled by the all new Nissan Murano. Honoring black excellence and celebrating every meaningful mile forward.

[Crystal]

Y'All. New York City welcome to The Reid Live 12 Year Anniversary show live at the Beacon Theater in New York City. We wanna say thank you so much to our good friends at Nissan for sponsoring the show tonight. We're gonna have a good old POC time. I am the bitch that's gonna take Eric Adams down once and for all. We've had enough.

[Kid Fury]

And I am Emmy winning Tony nominated queens icon Keith David, period.

[Crystal]

And this here is the Read. We want to thank you all again. The Read Life.

[Kid Fury]

The Read Life. The Read Life. The Read Life.

[Crystal]

The Read Life. The Read Life. He done caught the Holy Ghost he running through the sanctuary The Read Life.

[Kid Fury]

Lord.

[Crystal]

Somebody grab the deaconess. Tell her to get a towel and some water.

[Kid Fury]

Bitch. Have you ever fell out in church? Like for real? For real.

[Crystal]

No. The one time I caught like got covered up. Oh yes, yes. But I wasn't really feeling it. I was, I was pretending that I felt it cuz everybody was looking at me. So I started to just real experience. I started just speaking gibberish and said oh Lord and fell out and somebody came and covered me up with a.

[Kid Fury]

My Terence was. Washington was similar to that.

[Crystal]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. But I wasn't. They were like, is God speaking through you? And I was like, I think yes. The spiritism. No, I was in one of them saying what I could.

[Kid Fury]

Well like you, you things towards the, the. The new year when I was maybe like, I don't know, 12, 13.

[Crystal]

Work, work, work, work.

[Kid Fury]

I think they could sense the fag in me. So the preacher was like, the preacher was like, put his hand on my, on my forehead or whatever and he was praying for me and I was like, yes, amen. And then he like pushed me expecting I guess for me to fall out. And I was like, that's a lot. It didn't happen. Then he like did it again and again and I was like, oh, oh, okay.

[Crystal]

Woo. Yep.

[Kid Fury]

And then they put a, they put a little blanket on me and I was like, wait, this is night?

[Crystal]

Yeah. And then you get took in the back and you get perhaps a juice honey.

[Kid Fury]

They left me right at.

[Crystal]

No, I mean eventually.

[Kid Fury]

Oh, okay.

[Crystal]

After, you know, after the speaker spirit is done moving, then you can get up. But not Nancy.

[Kid Fury]

I'm talking about. I was in front of the pool.

[Crystal]

Oh yeah. And they said, do y'all see this homosexual we have snatched?

[Kid Fury]

I mean when you put a blanket over me I assume it means I can rest.

[Crystal]

Absolutely. It means go to sleep. It's nighttime. Yeah. You did what the Lord told you to do, so. Yeah.

[Kid Fury]

Well, welcome to the read. 12 years. 12 years of this thing we have been doing. Do you remember 12? Do you remember Crystal at 12? What was it? Giving?

[Crystal]

Oh, God, that poor traumatized thing. It was giving. Well, I told y'all on the show one time, like nine years ago, somebody said, what would you say to your younger self? And I said, ease up on the bangs, bitch.

[Kid Fury]

That's an old ease up on the bangs. That's an old reference. It is, but that was one of the funniest.

[Crystal]

Cause 12 year old crystal rolled her bangs at night. Cause her mother was. Cause you would expect a black boomer.

[Kid Fury]

Oh, you know what I mean? Believe in yourself more or studying more. Don't be so this bitch said, ease up on those bangs.

[Crystal]

All them pictures, that photo of you.

[Kid Fury]

That shit was so funny.

[Crystal]

Every photo from adolescence, my bangs is like, shh. You know, and they tight on my forehead, nigga. So like, you know, you could ease up on. You don't have to roll that bang every night, girl.

[Kid Fury]

You had them Wilma Flintstone did super.

[Crystal]

Roll curls and would be so happy five days later when they start to fall. And then six minutes after that, I gotta get my hair washed. So what was the point? But yeah, I remember me at 12, and I remember me 12 years ago, still relatively new to the city and trying not to be fucking homeless, working any job I could, pawning my computer every week to pay the rent and getting it out the fucking mud, taking the train from 190th and Broadway down to Times Square for work every fucking day. And yeah, I fully remember that. And it has been such a joy and a pleasure and a privilege to be able to grow up with this show over the past 12 years. And we have y'all to thank for that. Y'all have been so supportive. All the day ones who've been listening since 2013 shout out to y'all. Yes. And to all the people y'all told who came and joined us along the way. The 2013s and beyond, we are so grateful for. Okay? Period. Sis said, I got here in 2019 and I don't love these niggas no less. So thank you all. Yes.

[Kid Fury]

We love you all so much.

[Crystal]

Cause y'all can go back and listen to that very first episode, and you can see a very big difference between the way these niggas act.

[Kid Fury]

Growth.

[Crystal]

You know what that is?

[Kid Fury]

Okay?

[Crystal]

Absolutely, yes.

[Kid Fury]

We're incredibly appreciative for all of you who've stuck with us for 12 God damn years. The amount of you who are like, yeah, you guys got me through junior high school. I'm in graduate college now and have three kids. Excuse me, I'm sorry, what did you just call me a bitch and old. Cause it feels like you called me an old bitch. Like, I think that that's what you just said.

[Crystal]

That's what happened.

[Kid Fury]

But it's awesome to be able to, like, look at Crystal as someone who is just my personal homegirl who was like, I'm moving to New York. And I knew I wanted to move to New York, and she just helped me. And we kind of just like, on a whim, started this thing, and it's blown up into something that it really, like, affects people, and y'all still tap in. It is, like, indescribable how much it means because we regular ass niggas.

[Crystal]

True. We are so. Thank y'all so much. And yeah, I guess we. It's time to dive in, Dive into black excellence. Oh, okay. Black accents. I thought it was time for the ghetto negative shit. No, Glad I didn't say that.

[Kid Fury]

No, it was time for something good and nice.

[Crystal]

Yes.

[Kid Fury]

Okay, so this week's black Excellent. Let me give to. I'll give it to a couple people. Okay, so first of all, we'll just say Kendrick Lamar, this halftime show. My girl. It's so first of all, actually, Kendrick Lamar, Charmeledonna, Serena Sza. Everybody involved in that halftime show.

[Crystal]

Yes.

[Kid Fury]

The most watched halftime show of all time.

[Crystal]

Work, Kenny.

[Kid Fury]

Breaking Michael Jackson's halftime show record from 30 years ago. The halftime show drew in 133.5 million viewers. This is more than the football game. Its which had an average of 126 million.

[Crystal]

Wow.

[Kid Fury]

So many of you niggas like me. When Kendrick said, turn the TV off, you said, okay.

[Crystal]

Y'all saw that nigga flash a grin and you saw game over. And you said, correct.

[Kid Fury]

Just one more.

[Crystal]

Actually, the game is over. The chief's not coming back from this. But we didn't know that. We didn't know that. Shout out to the Philadelphia Goddamn.

[Kid Fury]

Hey, Philly. Hey, Phil. What up?

[Crystal]

What up, nigga? We was all eagles in that moment.

[Kid Fury]

Shout out to Ishkabbles.

[Crystal]

Our first show in Philly, they took us to Ish Kabibbles and we was like, this is it, actually. And they took us to the Rocky Stairs. We was like, facts, the Liberty Bell, and a real cheesesteak but yeah, I needed the Eagles to win so bad. Yeah.

[Kid Fury]

Go Birds.

[Crystal]

Go Birds. I'm fully a Saints fan. I'm a Saints fans fan. I wouldn't say that shit out otherwise. All right. Hey, hey, who that? Hey, who that? Who that? Said they gonna be this. It's five of y'all in here. It's five of y'All. But I was rooting real heavy for Philly. I needed Patrick Maga Holmes and his bitch ass wife and Uncle Travy. I needed all them niggas the up out of here. No. 3. Pete, shut that up. Well, first, Jaylen and Saquon and Cooper coming for that ass very quickly. The people are from.

[Kid Fury]

Because we have. We have other black excellence.

[Crystal]

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. No, no, no. Right, right, right, right. I'm in your segment. My bad.

[Kid Fury]

So let's do some more black excellence. Well, let's just continue that after we do conf.

[Crystal]

I'm so happy. I was just saying to myself, I wish I could talk to an employee at ESPN or FS1. And here you are.

[Kid Fury]

The National Football League super bowl game, which is considered the championship game of the league. It took place this past three. Yes. Cause the baddest bitches win it. Shut the fuck up.

[Crystal]

I didn't even say nothing. It's just, you know, it happened. It's fine.

[Kid Fury]

Featuring the Eagles of Philadelphia and the Chiefs of Kansas City.

[Crystal]

Boo. Especially when Trump said he was rooting for them niggas. Get the fuck out of here.

[Kid Fury]

Now, I don't want to be biased or ignorant. I will say that I can locate Philadelphia on a map and not Kansas City. I believe Kansas City is in Kansas.

[Crystal]

But that place, it's also in Missouri.

[Kid Fury]

Well, there you go. But regardless, the Eagles of Philadelphia took home the winning honor of being super bowl champion. They did at super bowl licks.

[Crystal]

That's exactly what it was.

[Kid Fury]

And a licking indeed, because, baby girl, them Chiefs didn't score. Not one point till the third. Got to win.

[Crystal]

You goddamn right about that.

[Kid Fury]

What the fuck?

[Crystal]

Shut up.

[Kid Fury]

Exactly. Exactly.

[Crystal]

At halftime.

[Kid Fury]

What's happening?

[Crystal]

Listen, that's why I wanted to talk to a professional sports analyst. Cuz what the happened?

[Kid Fury]

Was it a curse? Was there a rock in somebody's shoe?

[Crystal]

Right?

[Kid Fury]

Was it Taylor? We need more information. Because it doesn't. I'm not understanding how a reputable group who's been here, who's like, come this like, girly pop.

[Crystal]

Yeah, yeah.

[Kid Fury]

They drag.

[Crystal]

They did.

[Kid Fury]

And work my jalen hurts, you know? And I approve personally, if you would like my Professional opinion, I would. On what took place so much that held the. The Kansas City Chiefs back. Travis got to get that fade. He got to get back that fade. I don't know what that fucking. That his white Sean from Boy Meets World. Greasy ass bullshit that. That white lady got on top of his head.

[Crystal]

Yeah, yeah.

[Kid Fury]

Needs a fresh seizure with a fade down.

[Crystal]

He looked like a. He looked like a co. He looked like he. His job is to be racist and informant. Absolutely, Absolutely. You talk to that nigga in jail, you going to jail for longer. Absolutely. You right, you. I'm with you when you're right.

[Kid Fury]

So I'm just saying if that were something to consider, maybe, you know, take a step outside of trying to be a pop star partner or whatever, and you get that fade back and you commit to black women and look what life will give you. Why do you think that they were booing the diva and Ice Spice when they came up on the Jumbo Tron? Because Ice Spice can't rap and because Taylor sucks and it's controversial.

[Crystal]

That was not controversial, y'all. Ice Spice.

[Kid Fury]

Would anybody like to argue with that statement?

[Crystal]

No.

[Kid Fury]

Come to the no. Who disagrees? Who disagrees? Anybody want to come fight about. You want to argue for Ice Spice's talent? I disagree because I like her. I want her to thrive and be successful, just not in the realm of making music. Yeah, I think so.

[Crystal]

I think. I think you thought I was feeling you. That nigga, a munch is worthy of a Peabody.

[Kid Fury]

Like Peabody and Sherman. Or like a Peabody. What?

[Crystal]

I'm sorry. I meant a pee pea coat is worthy of a nice, warm pea coat in this. No, no, it's not working.

[Kid Fury]

Do you have anything else to say about your sports?

[Crystal]

Well, very, very thankful to the Eagles for that absolute ass whooping y'all put on Kansas City. Y'all made it so the refs could not even try to help them niggas win that game. Shout out to Jalen Saquon, even though he got that racist wife. I just found out about her tweets, so I wanted to like Saquon. First of all, he had Giants fans so sick, I had no choice but to laugh. Sorry. I know it's some of y'all out here, but y'all still shaking, crying, throwing up, nauseous over the way the Giants let Saquon go to Philly, so I wanted to love him. Plus, he got a beautiful smile and he just out there running that ball. But child. Anyway, shout out to the Eagles, y'all. Whole squad is fine for Some reason. And if it couldn't be the Saints, I'm glad it was y'all. I love Philly. I love Philly niggas. And so, yeah, you know. Go Birds. Glad y'all won. I saw a couple people got shot at the parade. I said, that's on. That's sadly on Brand. That sound like they finna write that into Abbott. Jacob got shot.

[Kid Fury]

Ooh, that would.

[Crystal]

At the Eagles parade.

[Kid Fury]

Here, please.

[Crystal]

Cause he was out there acting like he.

[Kid Fury]

You have to have a cameo. You have to have a. At least a cameo in the episode.

[Crystal]

So. But yeah, that's.

[Kid Fury]

That's hilarious.

[Crystal]

Thank you for allowing me to share in on your sports knowledge during your segment. I really appreciate it.

[Kid Fury]

Also, I want to give black excellence to Morgan Price. Morgan Price is Fisk's university's first HBCU gymnast to score a perfect 10. Work Morgana sharing the perfect score for her routine in a tri meet at Temple University on Saturday. And I read that it was, like, very, very important to her. She was, like, very inspired by the fact that it was an hbcu. She said, I chose Fisk because it is the first HBCU with a gymnastics team. Growing up in gymnastics, I rarely had teammates who looked like me. I wanted to be a part of history and inspire younger girls who want to attend and HBCU as well. I will forever cherish being a part of this team.

[Crystal]

Amen. I love that shout out to Morgan because I'm sure she had her choice of schools. I love when black kids be like, you know, I'm gonna go to the black school. Yes, them niggas pour into me.

[Kid Fury]

True.

[Crystal]

Cause, yes, them D1 programs can take you far, but at what cost?

[Kid Fury]

At. At.

[Crystal]

At what cost? What tremendous psychological and emotional despair. But you will be rich.

[Kid Fury]

Okay, now we're gonna move on into a segment that's formerly known as Hot Tops.

[Crystal]

I am being so normal and straight faced.

[Kid Fury]

This segment is now going to be referred to as the Hot Box.

[Crystal]

I don't.

[Kid Fury]

I feel that is like a mixture of the two. And then also. Hot box. Smoking weed.

[Crystal]

I get it. Yeah, yeah. And you know, sometimes the box is hot. The box is hot.

[Kid Fury]

Man, fuck this segment. She ate that. What were we?

[Crystal]

Oh, I'm not a comedian.

[Kid Fury]

Oh, I know.

[Crystal]

That was fucking hilarious.

[Kid Fury]

The box is hot.

[Crystal]

Let me see your notes.

[Kid Fury]

Okay, let's begin. Good luck. Cause I'm not finna do all that.

[Crystal]

No, I can tell.

[Kid Fury]

Okay, so the first thing I have is. I don't wanna start with that TikTok. Is back on stores. Who claps over there?

[Crystal]

Somebody who deleted it off their phone as soon as the ban was announced and ain't had it for the past month. They've been sick.

[Kid Fury]

So worried about y'all.

[Crystal]

Why did y'all delete the app as soon as they said it was banned? Why did y'all do that? Cause do you know people was buying phones on ebay that had TikTok on them for thousands of dollars?

[Kid Fury]

That is.

[Crystal]

It's coming right back. Why would you do it? You can't be without TikTok for three and a half weeks. I feel like that's a problem.

[Kid Fury]

No excuse.

[Crystal]

You can get to TikTok on your. On your computer. You ain't even gotta have your phone. It's not the same. But, bitch, if you need it that bad, I wouldn't spend no $6,000 on a phone. Cause it had the app installed. Bitch, you're a fiend. You need to go call the fucking lady. Get you on a 12 step program. Something is wrong. And I like TikTok is my favorite social media, but y'all was tweaking.

[Kid Fury]

TikTok has just not agreed with me as a concern.

[Crystal]

You don't get us.

[Kid Fury]

No, I think I do. I think I also just accept that that is not my shit and that everybody is allowed to have their own fun.

[Crystal]

Mm, mm, mm. That's true.

[Kid Fury]

But the amount of people who were ready to finally march.

[Crystal]

Mm, that's right.

[Kid Fury]

Cause it was like there are a family of cats on TikTok that they need me. That bake. That bake apple pies for a living. And how am I supposed to find inspiration and guidance through the world if I don't have a connection to them? And I'm just like.

[Crystal]

I mean, God, yes.

[Kid Fury]

Can you remove me? Like, just. I don't even have to die. Jesus. You just put me anywhere else because. All right, this is a lot. But yeah, no, TikTok is back, and everybody's doing, once again, a big hand clap for Jabba the Hutt, even though his ass is the one who was saying fuck TikTok in the first place.

[Crystal]

It took me a minute. Yes. You know, yes. The creator at TikTok was like, Let me go ahead and kiss up to this white nigga before my app can't come back. And that's. That's what happened.

[Kid Fury]

White in orange, sure. But like an orange creamsicle, I guess.

[Crystal]

He's just a giant baby. It's really wild.

[Kid Fury]

I hate him.

[Crystal]

I do, too. In fact, so many of y'all when I was silenced on the show a couple of weeks ago, so many of y'all was like, she came for Trump. She said, Trump gotta die. She said some things I would actually like to say right now. But nobody might cut it out. The show, right? They like, bitch, you. The Secret Service will be here before. Before halftime.

[Kid Fury]

That wasn't there.

[Crystal]

Please shut up. Yeah, it's really crazy to me. Cause we lived through this nigga once. And I can't believe y'all saw that and was like, bring that back.

[Kid Fury]

By popular demand.

[Crystal]

It don't make sense. By popular demand, it literally won the popular vote. So, yeah, get that bitch out of here.

[Kid Fury]

I was going to say something that's going to get me arrested. Let's see what else is there.

[Crystal]

We're going to jail if we say what we really want to say.

[Kid Fury]

Say, do you have my paper?

[Crystal]

It's right there underneath the. These hair flowers. The paper you said you didn't need and wasn't going to use. Y'all heard it.

[Kid Fury]

You don't know anything about me.

[Crystal]

Yeah, no, I don't. I do not.

[Kid Fury]

Attorney Tony does. Tony Busby is dismissed a lawsuit against Jay Z in connection to the alleged R word of a 13 year old girl with Diddy back in 2000. The lawsuit was dismissed with prejudice, meaning it cannot be refiled in its present form. Jay Z had a big paragraph response to this, calling it a victory.

[Crystal]

Yes, he did.

[Kid Fury]

And a fictional tale that they created that was laughable. Et cetera, et cetera. He said 1, 800.

[Crystal]

He called that a 1, 800-lawyer. And you know, shout out to Nikki, my makeup artist, look at what she did. Look at what? Look at what Nikki did. She literally transformed me from a troll into a woman so that I can appear before you. Nikki's from Houston and she was like, everybody know Tony Busby ain't shit. Tony Busby, one of them lawyers like you show you at the hospital. Cause a bus hit you, and Tony Buzz be at your bedside like, bitch, sign the paperwork right here. We finna get you four new tires and a whole nother neck. So I knew he had that reputation, and that is what it is. But I was being so careful about this case from the beginning because shit just seemed weird. And I'm never finna cape for no nigga. Especially a nigga I do not know. And Rich too. Please. They lie to do any goddamn thing. But when the victim did that interview on ABC or whatever, I remember you talked about. Remember that? Yeah, I said something. It's just A whole lot of shit here that's not adding up. So I'm not surprised that it got dismissed. However, I do. I am curious to see whether there will be a countersuit against Tony Busby from Jay Z and Roc Nation for. Because you can't take back saying that I did something like that. People think it. They've heard it. For a lot of people, it was all they needed to hear.

[Kid Fury]

He literally said in this statement, he says trauma that my wife, my children and loved ones literally at Ditten door can never be dismissed.

[Crystal]

See, Blue didn't deserve that. It would be one thing if the nigga had did it, but Blue didn't deserve. During her movie premiere, literally, the girl was out there working, okay? She's a knoll. So she's had a job since she was three months old and she knows how to fucking work. She was out there promoting her film.

[Kid Fury]

I have been managing your black ass and your black ass. I have choreographed and directed, directed and produced for both of you. Ungrateful N like it's my time, so clean it up.

[Crystal]

Blue is like ape shit. That was all me. And so I'm not getting why you niggas are being weird to me. Anyway, it was. The whole story sounded strange from the beginning. And I said, let's just see how it plays out like I usually do when it's serious legal shit. I said, let's just see what happens. So I'm not shocked. We'll see though. We'll see if the. If the countersuit comes through because you're not gonna lie on me like that and think I'm finna just let you get away with it. No, no, no, no. And I wouldn't even necessarily take it out on the girl because again, like I said, she sounded like. What's the kind way to say, you know, elevator don't go up to the top floor. She sounded like, you know, it just.

[Kid Fury]

Was some they manipulated some.

[Crystal]

Yes, it sound like she had been easily manipulated by others. So I wouldn't even go after her. I'm going after that lawyer who was like, I'm standing 10 toes down on this. You going to pay and you going to answer for your. Now you finna answer for yours. Give me your little flimsy ass law degree right goddamn now.

[Kid Fury]

Exactly.

[Crystal]

And that'll be the last time you play with somebody over some shit that you know good and goddamn well didn't make no sense. Be that talking about. She talked to Benji. Benji was in Germany, girl.

[Kid Fury]

So have you seen okay again in this hot Box thing.

[Crystal]

Love hot box.

[Kid Fury]

The whole point is I just want to like talk to you, of course. And not just be like, oh, and this happened on the 3rd of February. Have you seen the trailer for this movie G20 with Viola Davis where she plays the president and Marseille Martin plays her daughter? No. Bitch. Okay, hold on, hold on.

[Crystal]

How have I not. I haven't seen a promo for this.

[Kid Fury]

I'm gonna literally pull it up for you to watch.

[Crystal]

You know what it is? It's cuz whoever is doing Viola Davis's social media, let me just say this. I'm saying it out of love. Amy be posting every meme.

[Kid Fury]

Let her.

[Crystal]

I'm not, I'm not, I'm not following her. I'm just saying she don't have to do influencer. What you think now sipping.

[Kid Fury]

Viola Davis is starring in a movie called G20 that is.

[Crystal]

Ah, not Anthony Anderson playing her daddy again, right? Oh, sorry, I spoiled it.

[Kid Fury]

No, you didn't. Is it the trailer? You didn't spoil it. But yeah, I mean Viola Davis, obviously we love her. Marseille Martin. Who beautiful girl, been a stand up since season one of my little cousin Shout out to playing her daughter.

[Crystal]

Oh, I love her.

[Kid Fury]

Anthony Anderson is playing her dad again, which is. Is funny.

[Crystal]

Truly beautiful.

[Kid Fury]

And it's like an action thriller. Babe.

[Crystal]

It looks good.

[Kid Fury]

Yeah, and it looks really fierce. I'm very.

[Crystal]

I'm excited for that. I love my say.

[Kid Fury]

I'm like, I don't know how many more movies we get with black leads and this, you know, we both okay, cuz. Might take a while.

[Crystal]

Well, you know the thing about it is like y'all might hate us, but we steal the shit. We steal the culture. We still drive all this shit. So it's always gonna be no dei, except for the niggas we approve of. Like they ain't finna make a whites only NBA. Don't nobody want to see that pickup game bullshit.

[Kid Fury]

You bitches don't even like beer pong and Morgan walling. You lying ass dumbass bitches. You be waiting for the next saucy ass nigga shit to come out. So opted which are dumbasses, you're 1000.

[Crystal]

Or they play whatever was popping when they was in college. They're like no dei, but I love Nelly Hot in here.

[Kid Fury]

Oh my God. Have you guys ever heard the stanky leg? It's this dancer. I don't know. It's so funny.

[Crystal]

Soulja Boy up in this hoe, she's.

[Kid Fury]

Having a rough one.

[Crystal]

Oh yeah, no, because Marlon Ways is chewing her right up and good. That was part of my. It was supposed to. To be, but shit, let's talk.

[Kid Fury]

Matter of fact, Soulja Boy decided that he wanted to be a part of the Trump cause I guess that love and hip hop money ran out. So Marlon Wayne.

[Crystal]

Wait, what about all the video games and assorted things he was selling? Hoverboards and Scooty Bikes.

[Kid Fury]

I'm just not even gonna respond to that. And Scooty Bikes was Ray J. Oh.

[Crystal]

I thought Ray J had the glasses that you couldn't break, and then that nigga broke them.

[Kid Fury]

Yep, that's him, too. The point is, both of them are bad at business work. Marlon said he was in. He was doing a radio interview when they talked about Soulja Boy performing for Donald Trump. And Marlon L. Wayne said, I mean, Soulja Boy been canceled. Nobody cares who Soulja Boy is. Soulja Boy better go and get that check.

[Crystal]

Correct.

[Kid Fury]

Soldier boy was very upset and responded erratically, as he usually does, and went off on Marlon Wayne's and even included transphobic and homophobic slurs. Of course he did, directed towards Marlon's son Kai, who is transgender. Marlon responds to this by saying, you know, you can get canceled for transphobic slander like this. Fortunately for you, you don't have a career. Apparently, you've been canceled. Apparently, you've been canceled for the last 17 years. Crank. That was 2007, so we waiting.

[Crystal]

And when I saw crank, that was 2007, so we waiting. I said, add to notes. Let's go ahead and talk about it, because absolutely nobody asked you for your opinion on me or my child. So why you decided to insert yourself into the business of my child and their identity is beyond anyone's comprehension. But since you got hateful, ignorant shit to say, let me remind you that not since 2007, when Bitches was in a living room warming up, doing practices with their friends, talking about Soulja Boy, I'm in the house. Not. Not since then have you been relevant. And maybe you were the first nigga to go viral, the first nigga to be on, you know, the. To trend on MySpace or whatever. But that was 2007. It's almost 20 years later. Girly pop, what else you got? And we're waiting because simply being like, oh, your child is gay. Oh, your child is trans. I don't care. I love my kids anyway. This new generation of parents are like, oh, yeah, and I love my child. Y'all mad at Dwyane Wade because he won't ostracize his child because he won't kick his child out and be like, I don't give a fuck about you. Y'all want people to be out here damaged. And a big part of that is.

[Kid Fury]

Not even because you hate his child. It's because you wish that your motherfucking daddy loved you and accepted you beyond all of whatever you consider shortcomings yourself. But you didn't have that goddamn experience. You grew up in hate and expended hate your goddamn self. That's all that your hateful ass knows. You see somebody loving on their children, you know what I'm saying? Regardless, unconditionally. And it makes no sense to you, but it don't matter, because guess what? Every burger for ziya cheese on it. There's nothing that you can say, cheese, bacon on all my burgers for the rest of my life. What about you, bitch? Nothing. Exactly. Shut up.

[Crystal]

Exactly. There's nothing you can say to Marlon about his child either. So, yeah, chew these niggas up, because you got a lot of. Don't you have things to do? Is there not somewhere to clock in? I just know somebody need to go dust off the produce at Trader Joe's. Like, something needs to be done, and you could be doing that job right now. We need all kind of fire relief help out in Los Angeles. I was out to DMN and the Pacific to say, go volunteer, nigga.

[Kid Fury]

Plant a tree, something. Go fertilize some soil.

[Crystal]

Something, something.

[Kid Fury]

Nigga, you ain't doing nothing but popping perks and losing at Call of Duty. You half dead, bitch. Shut the up.

[Crystal]

Literally.

[Kid Fury]

Aubrey Graham has released a new album. Can I have a drink? Can someone bring me a drink? Hi. Hello backstage.

[Crystal]

Did y'all listen to May I have an alcohol?

[Kid Fury]

Thanks. Not an alcohol.

[Crystal]

Did y'all listen to Sorry Senseless Hoes Need Rent or whatever it's called?

[Kid Fury]

What is it called? Some Sexy Song and Sickening Sex. Something sexy for ignorance Song Sexy Something.

[Crystal]

No.

[Kid Fury]

Something sexy song.

[Crystal]

This man over here who talking about. No earlier, they were here for the vip, and we was taking pictures, and I said to his wife, I said, you don't want to send it to your husband? She said, no, Something sexy for you or whatever the. That album is called Child. I tried. I said to myself, Crystal Jean and myself said, huh? And I said, girl, our job is to be tapped into what's going on.

[Kid Fury]

That's my shit, too. I'm like, oh, do we have to?

[Crystal]

No. And myself, that is like, we enjoy being employed. Is like, yes, bitch. We have to. And so I Did press play. Short and sweet for you hoes.

[Kid Fury]

Oh, some sexy songs for you.

[Crystal]

Yeah, that is. Sure that I did press play. So I did my job. Unfortunately, I was unable to get past the very first track. I've heard some exciting things about one or two of them. Get. Shit. Is that what you said? See, y'all don't even know. Y'all can't agree on which song is the good song. I tried with Drake. I kept trying with Drake, but y'all know I left it behind at that album. That I won't say because you like to make fun of me for saying it. Correct.

[Kid Fury]

Scorpion.

[Crystal]

Scorpion. That's right. Scorpion was when I was like, I think I really gotta leave you behind. And I keep trying. Here's the thing. I'm fair to all these niggas. I would drag these niggas.

[Kid Fury]

Hold on. If we were, like, at the. If we were like, at the. Like, at the pet store and you saw them like. Like an actual. Would you be like, oh, they got scorpions. What would you say? Okay.

[Crystal]

Yes.

[Kid Fury]

Okay. That's all I wanted.

[Crystal]

And if you go to Oklahoma, you're gonna hear a bunch of other people saying Scorpion.

[Kid Fury]

Okay.

[Crystal]

And Amy and all the other shit I say that y'all think I say wrong. So.

[Kid Fury]

Okay. That's all I want.

[Crystal]

Yes, Marvel. And it is Marvel. Did you see the movie that.

[Kid Fury]

I'm not doing this. I'm not doing this.

[Crystal]

So continue.

[Kid Fury]

Continue.

[Crystal]

I am fair to these. Even though I drag them, I still go back and I give a fair listen to the music, and I will evaluate it fairly. However, I can't do that when the music is so goddamn terrible that I can't get through it. And that's how I felt about that opening track. I said, somebody gone. I tried. However, if you lose me at track one, how am I supposed to get through the rest of them hoes? When I pulled up Cowboy Carter and I heard American goddamn Requiem for the first time.

[Kid Fury]

Do that.

[Crystal]

No, I can't. Well, she's not the only one to have an excellent album opener. But you can't come to me with some at the top of this. I'm not gonna listen to the rest of it. Yeah, the opener. Got to set the tone for the rest of the album. I want. I'm not one of you chaotic who. Who put albums on shuffle on the first listen and blame it on your goddamn adhd. That's not me. I listen to it the way the artist intended. Oh. Oh, yeah, yeah. Some of y'all are like, I don't deserve that stray. I don't do that. I tried, though. I listened to that song and I literally could not get through it. I had to cut it off. So, you know, later on, y'all gonna tell me on. On Instagram and TikTok whether which song is the good one. But I liked it. It's a. I don't like.

[Kid Fury]

I don't. I, I, I agree about that song.

[Crystal]

I don't like the open.

[Kid Fury]

I don't like the full.

[Crystal]

Y'all shout out to Bria.

[Kid Fury]

Thank you, Bria.

[Crystal]

Bria does so much great work for the show.

[Kid Fury]

You have no idea. Bri was on tour with me all last year, telling jokes. There was one time. It was. There was one time I was.

[Crystal]

Ghetto.

[Kid Fury]

There was one time we was leaving my house, she came, we was in the car. We was pulling off from my house to go to the airport. I don't remember what city. And I just started breaking down crying. I just broke down crying in an Uber. And she was like, are you okay? I was like, I don't wanna go. Like, I'm tired. She was so nice.

[Crystal]

Poor Bria.

[Kid Fury]

No, she was like, very nice.

[Crystal]

Woo, woo woo. Get in the car.

[Kid Fury]

She was incredibly like, you going n.

[Crystal]

Get in the car. Woo woo.

[Kid Fury]

She was incredibly like crying to this.

[Crystal]

Tissue, but get in that car.

[Kid Fury]

Anyhow. No, I agree. It's spotty. The thing about it, right? The party next door. Drake, pocket of that like slow trap adjacent weird off pitch singy thing they do. You know what I mean? It's like very hit or miss for me. And it's usually missing. And a lot of this is that so sounds right. There were a lot. Especially like that first song, the one that they led with, like, I don't.

[Crystal]

Even know what it's called. I hated it so much.

[Kid Fury]

Something about you or somebody who love me or something like that.

[Crystal]

These people don't even know. They ain't play that shit neither.

[Kid Fury]

Hold on. Somebody loves telling me somebody I'm looking at it. Somebody loves me it's like the first thing they put out. And I was like, this sounds a fool like. Cause some.

[Crystal]

I hated it.

[Kid Fury]

I love Party Next Door as a creative and as a writer. But he was on the record talking about somebody. I need somebody. I said I need somebody too to come and get you because. But there are a lot of bops on here. I would just skip around and see what you like. Cause it's not all bad. Give me a hug is shady I.

[Crystal]

Heard see give me a hug I saw quoting but Shario said that's not the good song. What's the good song?

[Kid Fury]

No, Kia is the good one.

[Crystal]

Yeah.

[Kid Fury]

No kids, okay?

[Crystal]

I didn't get that far, as y'all know.

[Kid Fury]

But Nokia is good. Brian Steele is good.

[Crystal]

I'll try again. But Somebody Loves Me Sound like an ode to your grandma.

[Kid Fury]

It's awful. I hate that song.

[Crystal]

Somebody Loves Me. It's like nobody loves me.

[Kid Fury]

I like Small Town Fame. I like Penny's Dilemma. It's not bad. Okay, I didn't have like.

[Crystal]

Well, they should have picked a stronger one for the opener then. Cause I. How you want me to listen to this whole 22 track album and the first song is bad? Bitch, you supposed to hook me in, not push me out.

[Kid Fury]

First track and first single. God damn.

[Crystal]

Terrible, terrible.

[Kid Fury]

Who supposed to stick around?

[Crystal]

And niggas who are so dedicated to glazing Drake, they just will not accept that Drake lost this beef.

[Kid Fury]

Even of course he didn't name K. Dod, but he absolutely called Joe.

[Crystal]

Well, cuz, don't do that. Don't do that. Kendrick already told you to watch your fucking mouth and you didn't. So if I was you, I wouldn't.

[Kid Fury]

Say shit said this time. And for now I'm just leaving. I'm going.

[Crystal]

Go ahead and let you have it, cuz.

[Kid Fury]

You did turn into Gray Melissa Ford. That nigga's a dick sucker. Like, wait, what?

[Crystal]

Ghetto.

[Kid Fury]

Yeah, I listened to it. It was fine.

[Crystal]

Okay, I'm glad you liked it.

[Kid Fury]

What else do we have here? Big Meech had a welcome home concert that was canceled.

[Crystal]

I think I'm Big Meech. Larry Hoover?

[Kid Fury]

Yeah.

[Crystal]

Oh, I didn't know he was out of jail.

[Kid Fury]

That's hilarious. No, not because you should have, but because you don't. And of course you don't.

[Crystal]

I'm like, was it on Power? How was I supposed to know?

[Kid Fury]

Exactly, exactly.

[Crystal]

My bad.

[Kid Fury]

But you know, he and and 50 have been beefing, like, for a couple of weeks now because Meech was going to go do this, like, concert that's going to earn him some money. Like a welcome home concert. And Rick Ross was promoting it. Posed to be one of the performers. Rick Ross and 50 Cent have pettily hated each other, right by seven, eight, nine, ten years.

[Crystal]

Correct, correct.

[Kid Fury]

And so 50 saw him, saw Meech linking up with Rick Ross and was like, oh, so BMF is canceled. Your song is unemployed.

[Crystal]

Wow.

[Kid Fury]

Everybody can suck my dick. No, literally. Literally. Now, I doubt they're actually going to cancel BMF unless the people at Starz don't like the rating. If the rating is of Starz.

[Crystal]

Okay, right, right, right.

[Kid Fury]

I mean, if the rating of BMX is. BMF is doing well at Starz.

[Crystal]

Yeah. They're not gonna just over that studio.

[Kid Fury]

Will be like 50. You better get over whatever you black ass businesses. Build a bridge. You want us to recast? I don't give a. We're not stopping the show.

[Crystal]

Is BMF about Big Meech? Is it like Big Beach Freedom?

[Kid Fury]

Oh, his family in the black.

[Crystal]

Oh, Big Meech family.

[Kid Fury]

Black Mafia family.

[Crystal]

Got you. Got you. Oh, Black Mafia. Oh, I thought it was Big Me. I thought. Oh, wow.

[Kid Fury]

They really don't let these laugh at you. That was a perfectly normal thing to assume. There was that. That was a perfectly normal thing to assume. Bm. Bmf. Why wouldn't you think it was Big Meech family. Don't let these motherfucking raggedy ass bitches judge you, bitch. Why would you know that? You ain't no street bitch. You ain't no motherfucking hood rat that.

[Crystal]

Would know no like that.

[Kid Fury]

They're ghetto for actually knowing the true answer.

[Crystal]

Thank you. Thank you, friend. I do.

[Kid Fury]

Now I'm gonna sit up here and judge myself history not knowing what BMF stand for with your ghetto asses. Why do you know that? Since he got representation in here. Why the concert cancel.

[Crystal]

Oh, y'all knew what he meant. Wow, that's crazy.

[Kid Fury]

No, he had a show that was coming up.

[Crystal]

And did he send it?

[Kid Fury]

No, no, no, no. Big Meech had a show.

[Crystal]

Oh, right, right, right. Yes.

[Kid Fury]

The take place like Thursday in Florida. Lil Baby 21 Savage, Sexy Red Kodak black Rick Ross.

[Crystal]

Ghetto lineup.

[Kid Fury]

But I mean, big meets on brand.

[Crystal]

Yeah, that sounds right.

[Kid Fury]

He wasn't gonna book Normani.

[Crystal]

Baby, what you wanna do? Take a shot.

[Kid Fury]

Maybe Chloe, though. Y'all seen Chloe out in these streets with Burna Boy?

[Crystal]

I seen Chloe. Okay, so who? I said, oh, God, get my niece. Listen, it's something. It is something about African and Caribbean genitals. Dick especially.

[Kid Fury]

Yeah.

[Crystal]

Did you see? I am saying what I'm saying.

[Kid Fury]

What are you saying?

[Crystal]

I'm saying for that girl to be curled up hugging that nigga's knee like she was that Nigerian dick done sent her to the goddamn Stratosphere. Bitch, why you laying up? She look like Lainey laying up, licking on this nigga knee, just happy to be there. Oh, that dick done sent her into a whole nother time and space. And I know it's something about y'all from those regions specifically. Cause too Many of my homegirls that been lost to Jamaican Grenadian dick, Bajan dick, Nigerian dick.

[Kid Fury]

I've been trying to tell y'all, but you won't listen to me.

[Crystal]

Too many of my homegirls done got caught up. So when I saw Chloe grasping at that nigga's joints, I said, oh, God, it's over for my sister. It's over for my niece.

[Kid Fury]

I know that dick hit the spot. And she woke up the next day and was like, did you know there are oceans on Saturn? I saw.

[Crystal]

I saw them. I saw them with the orgasm you gave me on Saturn. I saw them on Saturn. And we should go. Let's go back. Let's go tonight.

[Kid Fury]

But not know Shayla. I feel like Chloe is T and God, what's his name? Burner Boy. Nose up in the air just the same, because, oh, yes, I've never. Me, me, myself, correct me. I've never seen Verna claim a single doll in the street. None of them. Every girl that I known that has dealt with Burna Boy, even motherfuckers he was seriously dating for years, Stefline. I'm like, I didn't know until after y'all broke up and you talked about it. You feel me? Like Chloe Bailey at the functions. This nigga shirtless.

[Crystal]

That's right. Letting Chloe walk him. I agree. His nose is wide open, too. But I seen my niece yesterday. I said, oh, she gone, baby. I wanted it to be, you know, oh, they just doing a song. You know, this is for the song. Yeah, I wanted it to be that so bad, child. No.

[Kid Fury]

Yeah. They both singing Chloe in.

[Crystal]

They put that dick.

[Kid Fury]

So, yeah. You know how I feel. I'm just like, do my girlies do right by my girlies? If not, I anticipate the possibility of a fierce album.

[Crystal]

Honestly, I feel like I personally am owed an ungodly hour tour. And I know Chloe and Halle are so sick of us.

[Kid Fury]

Wait.

[Crystal]

But they really got me through the early days of the pandemic, and I want it. Ungodly hour is still so good, and I respect y'all growing up and want to do your own thing. Halle want to sing about her baby. Chloe want to sing about dick. I get it. I really do. However, the things y'all did together with that ukulele soundboard in a dream, it was just incredible. You know, I would not be mad if y'all decided to do an UN. I'm gonna be right there with all the 22 year old sh. They gonna be like, what? Who, me?

[Kid Fury]

I'm Your mama has a new record coming out soon.

[Crystal]

Oh, yeah, I saw her. I. She. She did it online. I. You would really think I was a young. The way I'm in young business. She was on live doing the song and talking to people about it. Yes. It's called Back and Forth, but it's not very long. It's not a long song, but it's cute. I mean, it's hard for Chloe or Halle to have bad songs.

[Kid Fury]

They have gorgeous voices and kinds.

[Crystal]

I don't think they have bad music. It's just not always for me because I'm an old bitch. But Ungodly Hour was for me, even though I'm an old bitch. So that's why I'm, like, campaigning hard for that. But I'm in support of the girls solo careers. But you seen her in that pool. In that pool.

[Kid Fury]

They're both fantastic separately and have their own individual styles and stuff like that. And gorgeous voices solo. But the thing about them that's so fantastic as a group is how their voices compliment each.

[Crystal]

Oh, yeah, they sound beautiful. But me and their sisters. Yeah, yeah. So. But if y'all want to, you know, I get. You probably don't want to. Y'all probably, like, stop eventually, but. And when they do, I don't care if you are 48. I'm coming to the Ungodly Hour tour. No fact, I'll be 79 in that. Like. Yep. This is a memoir. Sure will.

[Kid Fury]

I simply agree. Hmm.

[Crystal]

I'm not 30 years older than them. I just wanted to clear that up. It's just being, you know, exaggerating for comedic effect.

[Kid Fury]

You know what? I think that's gonna be it for our hot box this week. The box is hot. The box is hot. Maybe that'll be the.

[Crystal]

I just want Dwayne to clip that.

[Kid Fury]

Oh, maybe that'll be the intro for it. I'm not mad at it.

[Crystal]

He gonna be like, no, do a clean one at home.

[Kid Fury]

I'm mad. Yeah.

[Crystal]

I'm not getting that raggedy live show audio.

[Kid Fury]

Okay, that's it for Hot Tops, but very, very quickly. If you've been to a live show, then you'll know before we move on, we typically like to give y'all a second to maybe suggest something within the realm of hot toppingtons that we have not discussed anything in the world of pop culture and so on. You want us to hear about now or forever hold your peace?

[Crystal]

I don't watch Love is Blind. I'm sorry. I don't trust Love is Blind. No, More. Who?

[Kid Fury]

Who?

[Crystal]

Matthew Robinson. Y'all said a name that we don't know. God bless. It's probably a black queer person. Y'all saying some things that I think are part of the read as well.

[Kid Fury]

Somebody said Wendy Williams.

[Crystal]

Oh, yes. I don't know if this is a good thing, though. So if you didn't hear. Wendy is getting out of her conservatorship. She is going to be freed. Yes. Hashtag free Wendy. Oh, here's the thing, though, guys. Here's the thing. Here's the thing. I'm just going to say this real. Generally, sometimes people are in conservatorships because they need them. Now, I don't know that that's true for Wendy, and it's so much messy shit surrounding her that I'm willing to give the benefit of the doubt. But that. That one documentary where she. Where her wig was.

[Kid Fury]

Bitch, bitch.

[Crystal]

I said, now, one thing I know about Wendy Williams, as a Southerner, what I know about Wendy Williams is she don't get on camera looking like that.

[Kid Fury]

This is simply fat.

[Crystal]

She don't do that. Yeah, period. The. The insecure, obsessed with image and what people would say or think about her. Wendy Williams, I. It was hard for me to believe that she would voluntarily sign up to be filmed like that. But.

[Kid Fury]

But she was in that documentary. I remember. Remember the part where she was in there? She looked like the substance and she was getting her on, you know, I don't know that she was getting her nails done. This black girl was doing her nails, and she snapped at the black girl like, why are you doing it like that? Are you stupid? And the black girl looked at her crazy, and she was like. She turned the camera. She was like, she's disgusted with me. It's fine.

[Crystal]

That's when everybody around you knows that you're mentally ill and they're like, we just gonna ride with it. This bitch cannot say or do something better than this.

[Kid Fury]

But it did. Like, yeah, just watching that. That documentary, I was like, oh, sometimes.

[Crystal]

You know, sometimes these are for the.

[Kid Fury]

For the best. But perhaps that clip the other day, though, she looked great.

[Crystal]

That's what I'm saying. I think that was probably shot over a year ago, and it's very possible that she's just in a better state now and can now care for herself. Yes, I also do hope so, because. Well, I hope so in the generic I don't want suffering for other human beings kind of way. But I have heard a lot of that old Wendy Williams radio shit. And, you know, sometimes you get dragged and you deserve it. Listen, sometimes you, sometimes you deserve people talking about you the way they.

[Kid Fury]

I'm barely myself a Wendy Williams fan. Right. Because of like the back and forth in terms of my opinions on some of the things that she would say and, or the way that she would behave on her show, her TV show and radio show. However, I also can't help but acknowledge the, the impact that she has made as a black woman in the talk space.

[Crystal]

Huge right up there with Oprah.

[Kid Fury]

In that regard. I simply just want two things. A, for her to be healthy for her kid and for her own, you know, peace. Like you do all this working and all of this other stuff, at least you can like be hopeful. You can enjoy and relax and enjoy it and then other thing not be taken advantage by people around you who feel like they can do that because you're possibly sick or, or whatever. That's it. She could never do another show ever in her life or whatever. And I wouldn't, you know.

[Crystal]

Yeah.

[Kid Fury]

You know, loses it. But I, I, the idea that she might be feeling better, feeling healthier makes me feel good.

[Crystal]

Oh yeah. So shout out to Wendy. Hope she's doing much better.

[Kid Fury]

Yeah.

[Crystal]

And yeah. Okay. There's some.

[Kid Fury]

Come on free Wendy.

[Crystal]

I mean we up north. It's some, it's some Jerseyans in here.

[Kid Fury]

The doll used to record right down the street, period.

[Crystal]

Love Jersey. This special episode of the Read is brought to you by our sponsor, Nissan. These days it feels like the world and our lives are moving at hyperspeed. The all new Nissan Murano is an unapologetic refuge amidst the daily hustle and bustle. A place where you can take a beat to just catch your breath, chill out and re energize. Because sometimes the greatest rush is not rushing at all. So go ahead and sing. Into the comfort of leather appointed seats that do more than support. They massage away the tension of a busy day leaving you refreshed for whatever comes next. Escape into your favorite music with the Bose premium sound system. Every note, every beat crystal clear, exactly the way we like it. The road is yours to explore with a soundtrack to match. Thank you to the all new Nissan Murano for sponsoring and riding with us on today's journey. Disclaimer bows and massaging leather appointed seats are optional features. All right, I think we're ready for our question portion. We have our incredible friend Dustin Ross here. Make sure you go see Dustin Justin show at City Winery next month.

[Kid Fury]

Make sure that you go and see.

[Crystal]

It's March 17th right yeah, March 17th.

[Kid Fury]

Live show on the 17th at City Winery. He's going to be telling jokes. As someone who tells jokes and is friends with this nigga, I can tell you he's fucking hilarious. So don't waste your time, okay? Or opportunity. Go have fun. Go see him or I will judge you.

[Crystal]

Yes. So we got a table. We gonna be there. So come see. All right, friend, who. Who's up first?

[Kid Fury]

All right. Who got something to say? I feel like an auction. Come on. You ready? And I'm letting you know right now. 12 years we've been doing this a while. You come up and ask some bullshit, I'm dragging you. That's right. There will also be a checkpoint tonight because I'm gonna ask you first. Do you have a. You have a question? Not a comment right now.

[Crystal]

Meanwhile, this girl want to ask about Japanese candy, and y'all done and threatened her and scared the hell out of her. Hello? Hello? Hey, girl. My sister's back there somewhere screaming.

[Kid Fury]

I was like, who the fuck was that?

[Crystal]

Work. I love how your sister not sitting with you. No, I bought a ticket for my daughter. My sister's on her.

[Kid Fury]

Oh, work.

[Crystal]

I did not think you were old enough to have a daughter. Black people are incredible.

[Kid Fury]

That is your daughter.

[Crystal]

Not your daughter is grown.

[Kid Fury]

You gave birth to that person.

[Crystal]

Meanwhile, I'm like, Here's a cute 31 year old woman to talk to. What? Okay. Hello. Thank you for being here.

[Kid Fury]

Black women are sickening. I'm so sorry.

[Crystal]

What?

[Kid Fury]

Just two seconds. Just two seconds. Two seconds.

[Crystal]

She just want to ask how.

[Kid Fury]

Forgive me. I'm the ignorant ass nigga from Miami. My history is crazy. Black women are fierce. Black women, black femme, femmes. Black women and black femmes, y'all are the recipe. Y'all are the most sickening, indescribable entities on the planet. And don't let anybody ever make you feel different. Thank you. I am so sorry. Good to you.

[Crystal]

Amen. Okay. Hello, beautiful woman who shouldn't be old enough to have an adult child, but somehow does. How are you? Well, first of all, I'm not afraid to say my age. I am 53. Turning.

[Kid Fury]

What?

[Crystal]

I don't even feel right calling you 80 because you look younger than me. What's up, Chloe and Halle? What? What's your. This nigga? Oh, my gosh.

[Kid Fury]

Fierce. Okay, what's your question?

[Crystal]

My question? I'm not trying to start any trouble. No, you don't. We know how much you love Wicked. We know how much you love Cynthia Erivo. But I sat with you, when you watched the Substance with Demi Moore, who do you truly believe will win the Oscar? Cause it's tomorrow, nigga. Cynthia Erivo or Demi movie more.

[Kid Fury]

Who do I think will win or who do I think should?

[Crystal]

No, no, not should. We know who you think should win.

[Kid Fury]

Between the two of them, I think they'll give it to Demi.

[Crystal]

I do see the substance. Is it that good?

[Kid Fury]

It was really good.

[Crystal]

These said begrudgingly, yes, it's really good.

[Kid Fury]

But it's not your type. Yeah, it's a body horror movie.

[Crystal]

And even with Cynthia, you know, I, I, I think Cynthia is incredibly talented, but she's not without her own controversy. So, you know, and black Americans are extremely forgiving. We're very hashtag nice.

[Kid Fury]

Especially if you can sing, bitch.

[Crystal]

Especially if you can sing. But, you know, I mean, I don't think Cynthia Erivo needs our pity either. She's incredibly accomplished and talented.

[Kid Fury]

So I think she should win it.

[Crystal]

Because I'm still watching Wicked, the girl who did my braids. She came over. I said, you want to watch Wicked? I'm just offering this movie to niggas. She was like, not really. I done already pulled it up.

[Kid Fury]

I made my parents go to the theater, like, literally, like, specifically because this black woman with an amazing voice was taking on this role that even though I knew a lot of us may not be familiar with, would watch and be like, oh, I feel something in it. Do I think Cynthia Erivo? And I said this on the podcast. I think maybe last week or before, Cynthia Erivo should win. I've watched pretty much all of the, the, the films in that category. I think, to me, the front runners are Fernanda Torres, Demi, and Cynthia. I think Cynthia should win not only because even if she didn't sing, the way that she was able to capture emotion and express emotion as a green person that is a witch in a fantasy world, in a way. And mind you, in an adaptation that is over 20 years old, you are able to capture emotion within this character on screen in a way we've never seen before. Then you sang some of the hardest Broadway songs to sing while strapping in a fucking, like, catapult harness doing loop de loops and shit while belting notes. You should win. Ain't nobody clear you in this category. The end.

[Crystal]

Amen.

[Kid Fury]

But as we said, Cynthia is a bit younger. I feel like Cynthia will be nominated a few more times, probably even for Wicked Part 2.

[Crystal]

Right.

[Kid Fury]

Whereas Demi, this, this is like her comeback. She did an excellent job in the Substance, and I feel like a Lot of people will give it to Demi as kind of like no shade. Kind of like.

[Crystal]

Because they like. Cynthia got a million more chances at this. Demi probably don't. And they like another young black egot. We just did this with John Legend, bitch. Another young black egot. No, thank you. We can wait a couple years.

[Kid Fury]

I really want Cynthia to win because I think that she more than. More than deserves it.

[Crystal]

If she don't get it now, I think she'll get it next year because Wicked is just that good. So, you know, you can hate black Americans and still be popping.

[Kid Fury]

They do. Lord, but they love Wicked. So that's the thing. But I think a lot of the girls are gonna bubbling Demi because they're.

[Crystal]

Like, oh, got you.

[Kid Fury]

I love the substance. And she wasn't like Carla calling and.

[Crystal]

Oh, well, right. She wasn't doing it on Mama from.

[Kid Fury]

Amelia Perez was like, do the black people have to come to the office?

[Crystal]

Dustin, who's next?

[Kid Fury]

All right, you got a question?

[Crystal]

Yes, of course.

[Kid Fury]

Okay.

[Crystal]

Hi, I'm.

[Kid Fury]

You can hold it.

[Crystal]

Oh, thank you. Hi. I'm so nervous. It's like a Disney Channel movie moment. Yeah. I love you all. Come on.

[Kid Fury]

If you know, you know.

[Crystal]

So as.

[Kid Fury]

Oh, this up.

[Crystal]

Yes. Tears. Hey, what up, people in the balcony.

[Kid Fury]

I didn't realize it was three tiers.

[Crystal]

I. I love seeing all your beautiful black faces. Hey, baby. Yes. And your white and Asian significant others that you brought along. Tomato, tomato, tomato, tomato. We love to see all of y'all. Okay. We love to see it. We truly do. Here, nigger, what's your question? I grew up in Baton Rouge, Louisiana, at current. Yes, Period. I'm from Baton Rouge originally. Oh, yeah. Wait, look what you can. Well, girl, I was born in Belgia City, but I grew up in. I grew up in Shreveport. And then. Oh, wait, hold up. And then Rouge for a little bit. And then we moved to Oklahoma. Do you have 23andMe? Do you have Ancestry.com? i did that a long ass time ago. And they told me they were like, you 65 Nigerian and Ija, period, period. I was like, is it offensive if you get the flag? And the Nigerians were like, no. So what's up, though? I'm sorry. I'm holding y'all. So as somebody. As a black, I said Louisiana, and immediately I'm like, somebody had on a Creole sweatshirt earlier. Shout out right here. Korea.

[Kid Fury]

Gang.

[Crystal]

Gang. Who that? Louisiana. I already know. I currently live in Austin, Texas, where Elon Musk KKK is right on the corner. Yeah, I. It's My birthday on the 13th or it was my birthday on the 13th. Work. This is a present to myself. So my question was, as somebody who just got an opportunity to move to Chicago, what would you say for a black. Thank you. A Southern black person who's going to be experiencing a whole new life and a whole new culture. Bitch, let me tell you one thing about Chicago. You remember that old ass. It was Kings of Comedy or Cat Williams or somebody. And they said, when you go to Chicago, you need to get a coat from here for here. I'm saying this with all the love in my heart. They call that win in Chicago. The Hulk for a reason. She will cut your neck off when I say, not even in New York City have I had to be as bundled the fuck up as I was in Chicago one time. Because I was fucking a little in Chicago for a while.

[Kid Fury]

Sure was.

[Crystal]

So I was with that little nigga in Chicago once in, like, January or some shit. Now, you know, I really wanted the dick to be in Chicago in a goddamn January. Tell me why it snowstorms all in this bitch. And the temperature dropped to, like, negative 2, and then the real feel was negative 28. I. I said the Lord God don't intend for niggas to be in this space between October and April. He do not. Black people do not belong. And I can't understand how it's so many niggas. I feel like y'all simply must go indoors when that snowing shit start and you just don't come back out till it thaws. I've been stranded in Chicago because overnight we got six and a half feet of snow. And now I'm. I'm stuck an extra two days with this nigga. And I was supposed to be leaving today, like. So what I will say to you as somebody contemplating a move up north, is to be ready for that cold. No. New York will not prepare you. Chicago is on another level. And to this day, I do not go to Chicago outside of the summer. You got me up. But beautiful city, beautiful city, incredible food, incredible people. Love Chicago. But that weather, no. Cause you niggas is on the lake out of here.

[Kid Fury]

Chicago is brutal.

[Crystal]

Sorry. I feel like I was ranting, but I had to say that I prepare you. Cause you just don't even know.

[Kid Fury]

Right here in the back. You have to know. Question. Yes.

[Crystal]

Hi. Hi. Thank you guys for coming out here and doing this amazing show I had.

[Kid Fury]

It's not that great.

[Crystal]

Yes, it is. Thank you, boo. So my question for you is Kid Fury, given your Caribbean Background and the fact that you live with a lot of Caribbean people. And, Crystal, since you're so new to motherhood, how do I.

[Kid Fury]

Your dog.

[Crystal]

Oh, I am. I am so close. I thought you meant, like. No, no, no. I thought you were like, you have a Ghanaian boyfriend, and we all know I'm like the motherland. Really? Okay. Yeah. Well, no. What's up? What's up? What's up?

[Kid Fury]

Yeah.

[Crystal]

How do I convince my very stereotypical Haitian father to get a dog for my loving stepmother? Hold on. This is your father and stepmother? Yes. He loves your stepmother. Yes. Okay. He not, like, take or leave her. He want to keep her around. Okay. Yeah.

[Kid Fury]

What is. Okay. Couple questions. What is what? Do you know what his beef is with dogs?

[Crystal]

Does he not, like, want them in the house?

[Kid Fury]

He doesn't want them in the house.

[Crystal]

Oh, God, that's so real. God, that's so real.

[Kid Fury]

That's an.

[Crystal]

Where do they live? They live down south. No, we live in Boston. You can't have no dog outside in Boston. That thing gonna die. So I thought you was gonna say, nigga, they live in San Antonio. Keep that dog outside. No, you can't do that, sweetie.

[Kid Fury]

Listen, dogs depending on the breed, but most dogs are covered in something called fur.

[Crystal]

No.

[Kid Fury]

Thus.

[Crystal]

I'm sorry, go ahead. I'm not talking to you. I was just thinking out loud. Processing.

[Kid Fury]

They naturally don't deal with cold the way that you might anticipate or deal with colds because they have built in fur coats, as well as the fact that there are other things that you can do to keep them warm in that type of weather. Now, the other question I had was, why a dog for the mom? Is it something specifically she wants? Is she wants a dog. Okay. You all right?

[Crystal]

One time I did that at a show in LA and literally chipped my tooth.

[Kid Fury]

Yeah.

[Crystal]

So not the first time, unfortunately. I'm extremely clumsy, so I think your daddy will get over it. Basically. Basically, I say simply bring the dog home. Because a lot of times these stiff and gruff. Don't bring no dog in my house. Daddies. Soon as they get around that nigga for three and a half hours, all of a sudden they are pudding.

[Kid Fury]

Listen, I have to piggyback off of that because I very much agree. Now, it isn't promised, right? Because who knows? But I had a situation that was kind of reversed where my mom, my dad was very much like, yeah, dog, whatever. Get a dog. Dog to stay inside my mother. You know, both my parents are from the sticks in Jamaica, where if you had A dog that never even thought about stepping inside of your human house.

[Crystal]

That's a wild dog, right?

[Kid Fury]

Like, ew. Like, disgusted in my mother's womb, really. My daddy was just like, lord, ma met the children. So I think, like, to what Crystal is saying, at first, when we got. When we were kid kids and we got our first dog and we like, let them stay in the house. Like, first of all, I remember I asked, we found this dog. Like, the dog came up to my grandma's house.

[Crystal]

We took it.

[Kid Fury]

Beautiful black dog with a gorgeous coat. Da da da. So friendly. And I was like, mommy, can we keep this dog? Mommy, can we keep this dog? My mother was like, just ask your father if you can keep it. Because she just spot twist, right? She just knew my daddy was gonna say no. Daddy came home from work, daddy, can we keep this dog? Yeah, mine. My mother was like, bomba r stuff. What do you mean?

[Crystal]

Oh, no, not the bomba and the r trouble.

[Kid Fury]

But to that point to like, like what Crystal is saying, it became a. A. A thing where very quickly my mother was like, oh, God, this dog is so adorable. And I'm gonna go walk him and oh, my goodness, belly scratches. So your father might be, you know, like that too, if you. You just kind of do it. But I think that regardless if it's something that's gonna, you know, make your mom feel good and make your mom feel better, let that nigga that you call your father adjust.

[Crystal]

Even if he doesn't, like, immediately attach to the dog, seeing how happy the dog makes your stepmom. If he wants her to be happy, then that should be enough. And, you know, I think he'll. He'll probably just eventually be like, yeah, okay, let's keep the fucking mutt. But, you know, I don't think there's any explaining really, that's. You can do in those situations, even.

[Kid Fury]

If the dogs stay outside. Because you can't have an outside dog.

[Crystal]

Not in Boston.

[Kid Fury]

Oh, yeah, Never mind. Sorry, I forgot.

[Crystal]

No, that's illegal. What's up, Dustin?

[Kid Fury]

All right.

[C]

Hi, Crystal.

[Crystal]

Hi, baby.

[C]

Hi, Kefiri. My name is Manny. I'm 26. Prefacing real quick.

[Crystal]

I'm so young too. I love being 26.

[C]

I just wanted to say, Crystal, as somebody that just finished grad school as.

[Crystal]

Well, too literally, we're so young and we'd go grad school.

[C]

I got my master's degree in May. And when you were about.

[Kid Fury]

Yes.

[Crystal]

No.

[C]

Congrats to you.

[Kid Fury]

Congrats to.

[Crystal]

Congrats to you. Congrats to us.

[Kid Fury]

Congrats. To us.

[Crystal]

To freedom. You think K was walking around with.

[Kid Fury]

A fucking nice, funny fucking dress on?

[Crystal]

Okay, that's my fault for, for, for egging you on. What's up?

[C]

Happy Black History Month, everyone.

[Crystal]

Yes, correct as well.

[C]

I will say, like, I got my degree in public health. Trying to take our woo.

[Crystal]

Fellow colleagues, good luck. I don't even think the United States believe in public health no more. Just fired 3,800 niggas at the NIH Cotton Ball.

[Kid Fury]

Swallowed.

[Crystal]

Not good.

[Kid Fury]

Sorry.

[C]

My question is just that as somebody that is grappling kind of, I think, with the world, but also thinking about entering a more creative space and is just also working and hustling, trying to get by as two people who have dealt with transition, especially over the past few years with you with grad school and Kid Fury moving to la, I think just what advice do you have for somebody like me who I think is just trying to navigate and feeling a little lost, but just wants to do the best for those around him, both family and everybody else?

[Crystal]

Yeah, well, I think if you're. If your focus in life is doing good for others and trying to help out the people around you, you probably don't need to be worried about your path forward as much as the selfish, inconsiderate, rude, mean niggas who don't care about nobody but themselves. The fact that you're thinking about other. Well, I'm sorry. The fact that you're thinking about other people and how to make their lives easier or happier to me, shows that you're heading in the right direction. And so I think my advice to.

[Kid Fury]

You is keep your heart three stacks. Keep your heart.

[Crystal]

And play your part.

[Kid Fury]

Play your part.

[Crystal]

Yeah. There's always gonna be crazy shit going on in the world. Like, we're in unprecedented times for the 40th time this decade. So the world is always gonna be an absolute fucking mess. Stay centered as much as you can. Tap into community for real. The people you know, the people you want to know and be connected to, that's going to matter more than ever. And a saying that really helps me when my mind starts spiraling about how crazy things are, is be where your feet are. So as soon as I say it to myself, I'm like, girl, you over here having an absolute downward spiral at 1:16am in the bed. Be where your feet are. Where are your feet? Right here by your dog who's trying to chew on your second toe. So just be right here in this moment. The rest can wait. I read that In a book, baby. That's not me.

[Kid Fury]

I accepted that as education. But my God, be where you're feet. This is why the girls go to school.

[Crystal]

It's very helpful for pulling.

[Kid Fury]

I'm just gonna go up there. Cause I want some. I want some. I want a question from one of these. These upstairs.

[Crystal]

Dustin got a person right here.

[Kid Fury]

Yes. And I'm gonna go get a person from up.

[Crystal]

Oh, in the balcony. Oh, work. Okay.

[Kid Fury]

What? They don't matter? They can't ask a question?

[Crystal]

It don't matter so much. Go on up there. Is it an escalator? He gonna figure it out. Hello, young person. I love being so youthful as well. Just like you guys. Hi, my name is Alexis, I'm a Taurus. So my question is food related work. What would you guys have as a perfect day, meal wise like breakfast, lunch, dinner? You could choose home cooked meals. Place your phone, you see me, I got the answer to this. First of all, breakfast. Give me some grits with scrambled eggs. I need them with pepper and cheese. Don't put no sugar and maple syrup and bullshit in my grits. That is for oatmeal. That is for cream of wheat. That is not for grits. But what I have noticed is the north don't really have grits, but polenta will do. I will take Italian grits and eggs for breakfast. I'm not big on lunch, but what I do like is some beetroot, some hibiscus tea with beetroot juice added in a little honey and lemon. No, it's very good. It's good for your heart, good for your cardiovascular system. Because this administration is getting my blood pressure up. So I drink that hibiscus tea a few times throughout the day. And then for dinner. I love. This is gonna sound so fucking basic, but bitch, give me a chicken Caesar salad. What is it about Chicken Caesar salad with some fries and some wine. I could eat that every goddamn night. Girl, dinner, girl, dinner every fucking night. I can eat that. What y'all hollering for Beyonce here? Bitch. I turned around like, who the the is behind me. What's exciting is she here? What the y'all yelling at this nigga up in the rafters. What's your. What's your favorite food to eat?

[Kid Fury]

Excuse me?

[Crystal]

She said what's your. What's your favorite meals throughout the day? What would you eat? Breakfast, lunch, dinner. You could order it.

[Kid Fury]

Okay, so not dick.

[Crystal]

A lot of y'all said just feed me that dick. And I'm good.

[Kid Fury]

I'm so basic. Especially now that My stomach's got super sensitive. I just like really nicely cooked, seasoned chicken and, like, rice.

[Crystal]

Niggas love chicken.

[Kid Fury]

Potato, vegetables.

[Crystal]

Okay.

[Kid Fury]

I never liked ackee. Please take my Jamaican guard. It's never been a part of my ministry, but my father's also Jamaican and don't like eki. So y'all can't fight me. Okay.

[Crystal]

All right. Who you got up there?

[Kid Fury]

You wanna do a question? And who has a question?

[Crystal]

I cannot believe you went up there.

[Kid Fury]

Excuse me for trying to be, you know, in the mix. I got you.

[Crystal]

This is not a judgment. I'm so proud.

[Kid Fury]

Okay, you have a question. Okay. What's your name?

[Crystal]

It's mj.

[Kid Fury]

Okay, mj.

[Crystal]

Oh, okay. Mary Jane. Yes. So first of all.

[Kid Fury]

Be careful.

[Crystal]

I can help her. I don't need help. MJ said, fuck that bitch and the clique you claim. I think I can speak for everyone in here. Kid Fury, we are all so proud of you. Oh, so proud of you. Make him cry, make him cry. Make him cry. Make him cry.

[Kid Fury]

So proud of him.

[Crystal]

Make him cry. Make him cry, make him cry. And my question is, because baby is upset. He's like, what's the question? What's next? I'm ready for whatever. So what is next?

[Kid Fury]

I think that's. Here's a question for you and I, Crystal, what's next for you?

[Crystal]

She did not say. We are all so proud of Crystal. She did not say that. That was a question for Kid Furry. I think we all know what's next for Crystal is taking care of that God damn dog and trying to pay these bills. What's she talking to you, friend? Sorry.

[Kid Fury]

How many of you are familiar with something called Furious Thoughts? Okay, so Furious Thoughts is coming to you in a couple of months as its own podcast in the vein of late night talk and fuckery that un might expect in that realm. It's going to be fun. It's going to be unhinged. It's going to be me. And aside from that, I am DJing, producing music, I'm writing.

[Crystal]

Amen.

[Kid Fury]

You know, she's just kicking it, doing her thing. So Festive is working.

[Crystal]

All right, I think we have time for maybe one more.

[Kid Fury]

Okay, I got you.

[Crystal]

Okay. And then you gonna have to journey back downstairs.

[Kid Fury]

What you gonna do, fight me when I get there?

[Crystal]

Absolutely not.

[Kid Fury]

Well, I don't like the way you said it.

[Crystal]

Okay. You'll vaporize back down here then. Hi. I'm screaming.

[Kid Fury]

Ah.

[Crystal]

I'm Maya. I'm from Atlanta. I'm a transplant to New York. Girl, you said Trans. And I thought anything but plant. Okay. What's up? Transplant. I'm a transplant. I am an attorney at work. So you can help me in my quest to take down Eric Adams. We can protest together. I work at a very, very white law firm. I think that's my point. And I obviously want to keep my job. Yeah. But I also have to smile and enjoy the work. Yes. So any advice from y'all on us young black people just starting in our careers? Oh boy.

[Kid Fury]

Crystal, listen, you let me know when I can speak bitch, because I already know you can read on this.

[Crystal]

It's just. Well, I mean, so there's good news and bad news here. The bad news is it is probably not going to get better. The good news is as a lawyer, you've already been hazed and so you're probably pretty well prepared. Prepared for how bad it's gonna get. But for me, I mean, at this point, I have been self employed just as long as I was working a regular full time job, which is crazy. Shout out to y'all for listening to this show. And what has been, what was so useful for me? I don't know how good you are at code switching. I feel like maybe you kind of young. I feel like Gen Z is like, I'm not code switching. I am who I am. Code switching not only. It not only keeps you in the good white graces at work, it can also protect your own sanity and mental health because you can say to yourself, I'm finna go in here with my good cheese eating voice on and I'm finna, I'm finna talk to these white people about the Golden Bachelor and we're gonna get our goddamn work done. Like for me, it was very much like this deliberately mental separation of like, this is what I do in order to survive, have a job so I can pay my bills, go to the club, hit Taco Bell afterwards and be ratchet with my friends. And I honestly feel like it's a divide that capitalism forces most of us to, to have to make. Most of us are not living in our truth, doing what we were designed to do, what we're creatively pulled and inspired to do. Because capitalism don't give a fuck about that. Your calling is to make little earthworms out of different colors of play. D'oh. For children to process their trauma or whatever. But capitalism says no, bitch. Your job is to come answer these phone calls for the insurance company and argue with people about why we not gon cover they ultrasound. So I feel like it's honestly, a lot of people who are like, girl, what the fuck am I gonna do with this? But unfortunately, that's kind of part of joining the American workforce where you're like, I hustled so hard, I did everything I was supposed to do. And I'm lucky enough to have a job because right now a lot of people are searching and questioning qualified, educated people cannot find jobs. I'm lucky enough to have one, but I hate this bitch. But that's literally the cycle you end up stuck in. So I wanted this to be more encouraging, more like, you can do it. But actually, as a junior attorney, you probably already working 88 hours a week and seeing them white people do cocaine on their desk to get through the weekends. So I'mma just say, best of luck to you. And when the revolution comes, bitch, let's all join up. Because I don't feel like none of us should have to go back to the strip club, Stevie. None of us. I want all of us to be happy with this limited time we have on this floating fucking rock. But yeah, best of luck to you. Shout out to you for being a lawyer. That's so crazy.

[Kid Fury]

And with that, it's time for the read. I'm gonna get things kicked off because I don't want to take too much time. I just want to say that this read is dedicated to those of you.

[Crystal]

Who.

[Kid Fury]

Treat people who are open and vulnerable with their mental health issues and mental health disorders as a way to feel better about yourself. Those of you who use the mentally struggling or ill people around you as a way to try and fortify some weird, self diagnosed, self instructed feeling of oh, I'm a good person, when in reality you are not at all tapped into what the person thinks, what how this person feels, what this person needs. A lot of times you don't even give a about that person. And in many ways you're actually intimidated by that person because they have the strength and the bravery to be open and vulnerable enough to say that I'm struggling, I'm sick, I don't know what the I'm dealing with. And guess what? You especially being friends with them, are probably someone who is dealing with your own shit. And you ain't opening your mouth and saying a goddamn thing. So definitely don't open your mouth to try and fix to judge the next motherfucker who's being open about how they're feeling or what they're struggling with. Especially if it's not destructive to you. Why don't you go also and call the lady, why don't you also figure out a schedule for you to talk to somebody so you can figure out what your shit, bitch, before you try and put a crown or a white hat on your motherfucking head as if you're better than any of the fuck body, bitch. You backwards, ashy and crusty just like everybody the fuck else out here, bitch. At least niggas that you sitting here and trying to point fingers at. And little boy, little girl, little whoever, at least them motherfuckers are brave enough to say, yeah, this is exactly what the fuck is going on. And I don't know, you trying to play like your homelander, like you Beyonce and Solange, bitch. And you ain't. You ain't. You ain't. You ain't. You ain't hitting on shit. You ain't probably ain't never gonna hit on shit. So what you going to do is move the fuck out of people way who are at least doing the work to try to address and evolve because you ain't gonna do shit and you're not gonna help shit bitch get missing. Get moving. And also, don't forget to shut the fuck up when you do. Thank you. I'm done.

[Crystal]

Amen. Amen. Well, I only have a few things here very quickly. First of all, Stephen A. Smith, who is one of Kid Fury's co workers over at espn, that is a lie.

[Kid Fury]

That is. I could take you to court for that.

[Crystal]

Espn no more.

[Kid Fury]

I could take you to court for that. I've never worked with Stephen. I've never worked with.

[Crystal]

But he works at ESPN as well. That's all I'm saying.

[Kid Fury]

But I feel like the words that you're using are very charged and they're meant to, like, throw the audience off.

[Crystal]

Let me amend my statement.

[Kid Fury]

Thank you.

[Crystal]

By saying that Stephen A. Smith is his coworker, I am not intending to infer that they are friends or have directly worked with one another.

[Kid Fury]

Thank you.

[Crystal]

You're welcome. So, as we all know, Serena Williams was Kendrick's surprise guest at the. Yes. And sis came right on out C, walking like the white people was mad at her for doing all those years ago. She did it once again. And a lot of people were deeply pressed by this, including Stephen Ashley Smith, who said, quote, if I'm your husband, I'm thinking, why are you up there trolling him? Trolling your ex. Sidebar. If you did not know Serena and Drake dated briefly, perhaps you remember that song where he said, I swear I could be Serena when I'm playing with my Left. And we all were like you. You could not, you could not beat Serena if she was playing with her feet. But he continued and said, if I'm married and my wife is going to troll her ex, go back to his ass because clearly you don't belong with me. What you worried about him for? And you with me. Bye bye. Shout out to this nigga right here in the front doing the read for me before I can even get it out. Of course the Internet was not here for that bullshit. For excellent reason. Because first of all, Stephen H. Smith, you are knocking on 60's door. Yeah, no shade. I hope I live to be as old as you are. However, however, however, talking about if I'm married to Serena, I'm leaving her. In what galaxy can you even sniff the aroma of Serena Williams pubes? In what world are you qualified for that?

[Kid Fury]

If I'm.

[Crystal]

If that's my wife, I'm leaving her. What wife? When have you ever had one of those? Much less one as accomplished as Serena fucking Williams. You know what you would do if you were Serena Williams husband? Exactly what that white man is doing now, hyping her up, talking about that's my fucking wife and she been through too much bullshit because of you honkies and some of you assorted poc. But I'm not going to say that cuz I'm not one of y'all. But I'll call out you whites and I'll say how dare you.

[Kid Fury]

Also like Drake disrespected her husband specifically. Like if you were mar. If. If that were the case, Drake disrespected you in that situation. And so your wife was like, oh yeah, I'm a crip rock on his, his, his dead grave thing. Like why do you. Furthermore, it was bigger than just Drake, right?

[Crystal]

So Serena had every reason to get up there. I was never in, I was never questioning it because the seawalk alone, like she deserved it. Just to. Just to say you to the tennis world, much less Drake was not even my first thought because she's Serena Williams. Drake is nobody's first thought when you think of Serena. Serena Williams. Nobody's. You think Grand Slams, Australian Opens, US Opens club, another club. That's what you think of when you think of Serena fucking Williams. So one of y'all let me read it. Medium sizedmeech said a 57 year old unmarried man with a receding hairline who has never been married, mind you saying he would divorce our greatest living athlete who has been happily married for eight years to her very rich and loving husband keep quiet forehead. And I guess amongst all the comments, this one really got his goat because Stephen A. Quoted it and said, please go back and look at exactly what I said. I was talking overall from a man's perspective, highlighting what most men would think. I didn't utter a single disrespectful word about Serena. No issues with folks getting upset of literal, serious stuff once pissed about that sentence. Doesn't make sense. This doesn't qualify, peeps. God, you're old. Come on, we were joking around on at first take. Damn, y'all. Exclamation point. It's not that serious. So maybe now you've learned to keep Serena's name out your mouth because what do you mean it's not that serious? Yes, it is. When we're talking about Serena, it's absolutely that serious. Oh, what I would do. What I would do if she was my girl. But she's not. I'm highlighting what most men would think. Most men not qualified to be married to Serena Williams. If she would marry any old goddamn body, she'd be married to Drake. Clearly she has standards. And I'm not one to cape for white men, but if that white man is making her happy after you niggas disparaged her and talked so terrible about her for her entire fucking career, then let that white man love on her. Y'all do that same thing with Gabby. It's like, you didn't even like those girls. You didn't even want those girls.

[Kid Fury]

Come on, now.

[Crystal]

So now that a white man is like, oh, actually, I love this black queen, y'all. Like, what black queen? Let that white man love her. You don't have to love and respect and adore and cherish her for somebody else to do the same thing. So, Stephen A. Smith, I said your little half. Not even really an apology. I didn't utter a single disrespect, respectful word. What do you think? Oh, I would leave her if she went up there during the halftime show. What you. What do you think that is? Did you think that was a sign of respect? Did you think we heard that and was like, oh, adoration. So fuck him for that. Also, I just very briefly want to talk about Anthony Edwards baby mama. Do y'all know this hoe? Her name is Aisha Howard.

[Kid Fury]

No.

[Crystal]

She gave birth to Anthony Edwards baby in January.

[Kid Fury]

Yeah.

[Crystal]

They are now going back and forth about paternity. He asked for a paternity test the day after that child was born. Work. When she texted him that she was pregnant, because he blocked he wasn't talking to her and would not see her in person. So she said, you know, I was trying to tell you this in person, but I guess you're not trying to do all that. But you know, I'm pregnant. And we probably should have kept it cordial, but here we are now. And this nigga said, okay, lol, get the abortion. Lol. Of course, Aisha said, abortion is not an option. I already got a baby by a rich. She got a baby by little baby. Yes, she got a baby by little little baby. The problem with Aisha and Anthony Edwards is that they fucked in Georgia. He was like, this is a magic city stripper. But Aisha very smartly moved to California where you get much money more for child support, etc. And so she's filing for child support support in California. He's like, no, establish it in Georgia so I can give that the $542 a month she deserves California. She will get paid real money. So that's what they're going back and forth about. My beef with Aisha is that Anthony Edwards is 23 and she is 36. I've said it before, I said it with Drea. You dirty stinking old have got to start leaving them young alone. I don't know. I'm saying what I say because if it was a man, I would be dragging him from here to Sunday. So I'm not gonna let you get away with it. 36 with a 23 year old. We know that all you looking for is NBA money. We know that you don't give a fuck about nothing but what child support you can get out of that, man. We know that sister. Why is your big grown ass even in conversation with a 23 year old? Other than the dollars that he is directing towards your areola? We don't have nothing else to talk about. I've said this before, it is nothing that one of you. And it's actually a shame because the people who hit on me overwhelmingly are in their 20s. But there is nothing you young can do for me besides fetching my postmates and bringing it right to the door. I what we going to talk about? How old were you when 911 happened? You don't remember it? Get out my bed. You a trifling dirty bitch. And I hope he do get child support established in Atlanta because. Because between Lil Baby and an NBA player, you ought to be able to carry them fucking bills. Pay that goddamn rent, you stupid bitch. And finally, now shout out no. Because Shario reminded Me of this backstage. And I said, thank you, friend. I had almost forgot it was too many of y'all. When Cowboy Carter came out. They already know.

[Kid Fury]

I don't even know what the she about to say. Can you.

[Crystal]

It was too many of y'all.

[Kid Fury]

Oh, yes, I do.

[Crystal]

This isn't for me. Oh, all this real down boogie in a real life ho down. Get that away from me. It was too many of y'all. Talk about how Cowboy Carter not for you. It's all over the place. Beyonce, I don't understand. I don't like it. Blah, blah, blah. For me to have been in line during therapy to get tickets for Cowboy Carter. Them tickets went on sale Tuesday at noon. Now, that was in the middle of my therapy session. And what did I do? Hold, please. Logged on to Ticketmaster, signed in. Ticketmaster said, oh, we're going to send a code to your phone. Have to then take a break, open up my phone, go back to the computer, type in the code, sit in the queue.

[Kid Fury]

I'm.

[Crystal]

We're supposed to be talking about me. This is in the middle of me talking about my fucking trauma. I'm grieving a friend. I'm grieving family. I said, no, actually, the tickets go on sale at noon. I simply must for all of you bitches to have hated this album. Why the was it 30,000 of you in line ahead of me for the May 24th show over there in Jersey? And so I posted about this on Threads. I'm like, this don't make no goddamn sense. Make Beyonce unpopular again. Break, break. What happened to Illuminati? Bring that back. And people were sending me screenshots. Ate 80,000 in front of me. It's 55 in front of me. Y'all said you hated it. So why the are you here now? Let everybody who got daddy lessons the first time go to the show. This shit is for me, God damn it. If you don't know what hog says it cheese is, this is not for you. Look at all these northerners. I don't know. My grandma had pickled beets on the counter. Did that count? Sure, I'll let y'all have that. But I'm just saying it's way too many of y'all who swore up and down this was Beyonce's worst album, Flop era, et cetera, et cetera. So how come we can't get no tickets? How come first day tickets in section 300 was $879? How come this bitch gotta add in other shows in the same cities? She gotta pack Shit in. So she doing six shows in seven days. Then what happened to nobody liking it? Go back to not liking it. Pulling my prices up. No. Cause I've been here since. No, no, no. You bitches. Sorry. Sorry. Now I sound like y'all. Now I sound like y'all. I've been listening to the re from the beginning. I was here for smell and taste. How dare these new. Anyway, anyway, I'm done. I'm just fed the up. Go back to not liking her. Please. Please don't like Beyonce. Please. Hashtag boycott Beyonce. Because used to be easier. It used to be easier than this. We didn't have to navigate with nine friends and try to figure out who going to get the the two tickets we can get to this show. You didn't used to have to game plan like that bitch. You used to just buy the tickets, don't like her no more. Shit. And that's it for me. I am done. And that will wrap up.

[Kid Fury]

That is it for the re live 12th anniversary, folks.

[Crystal]

Thank you all so much for being here.

[Kid Fury]

We love you so much, New York, surrounding areas. Anybody who flew in to be here, shout out to we forever, ever, ever, ever. Love y'all.

[Crystal]

Shout out. Thank y'all for being here. Thank you, boo.

[Kid Fury]

Thank you for the whole show.

[Crystal]

Thank y'all.

[Kid Fury]

This episode of the reed 12th anniversary was brought to you by the all new Nissan Murano, celebrating black creativity, culture and the roads ahead. Thank you to the all new Nissan Murano for sponsoring and riding with us on today's journey. Let's keep celebrating black history because I know I'm gonna one mile at a time and then two, and then three. The 12th anniversary was brought to you by the all new Nissan Murano this month because black history month is about bold moves, big visions and driving forward together. The Reed 12th anniversary episode was brought to you by the all new Nissan Murano because bold journeys are worth celebrating this month and every month. Take care.