Best Of 2024 Pt. II

Summary

Podcast Summary: The Read - "Best Of 2024 Pt. II"

Release Date: January 2, 2025

Introduction

In the "Best Of 2024 Pt. II" episode of The Read, hosts Kid Fury and Crissle dive into a variety of topics spanning personal experiences, pop culture commentary, and listener interactions. The conversation is marked by their signature humor and candidness, providing listeners with both entertainment and insightful discussions.

---

Personal Updates and Life in New York City

00:57 – 05:01

Crissle begins by sharing her recent experiences attending multiple graduation parties and spending time with family in Texas. She expresses gratitude for the love and support she's received, highlighting her accomplishment of completing graduate school.

Kid Fury updates the audience on his new puppy, Lainey, discussing the challenges and joys of puppy training. They humorously navigate the complexities of introducing a new pet into their lives, emphasizing the sleepless nights and the adjustments required to accommodate Lainey.

• Crissle: "She's incredible, and I love her motherhood already." [01:32]
• Kid Fury: "She's the sweetest little thing. So every day is different. Every day is new." [02:13]

---

Challenges of Raising a Friendly Puppy

05:19 – 19:44

The hosts delve into the peculiar interactions they've had with strangers who find Lainey irresistible. Crissle vents her frustrations about comments implying potential dog theft, expressing concern over genuine safety while appreciating the positive attention Lainey brings.

• Crissle: "Please stop telling me how easy it would be to kidnap my dog." [07:57]
• Kid Fury: "Every time I see a really cute dog in public, I don't even say anything." [11:07]

They discuss strategies for maintaining Lainey's safety, such as using playpens and staying vigilant during walks. The conversation underscores the balance between allowing a dog to socialize and ensuring their well-being in a big city environment.

---

Pop Culture Commentary: Megan Thee Stallion's "Hiss"

42:20 – 59:00

The conversation shifts to Megan Thee Stallion's new song "Hiss," analyzing its bold lyrics and the artist's fierce stance against critics and male counterparts. The hosts break down specific verses, highlighting Megan's unapologetic attitude and empowerment themes.

• Crissle: "This is the first person who told me that Lainey would be easy to steal." [07:57]
• Kid Fury: "She just gonna say it and then I'm out." [47:38]

They critique the song's directness and Megan's approach to confronting her detractors, drawing parallels to broader issues of misogyny and autonomy in the entertainment industry.

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Listener Letters and Personal Stories

19:45 – 38:15

The episode features letters from listeners, including one from "Ocean Gate," who recounts a mishap at a party involving missing poppers (a recreational drug). The hosts respond with humor and advice, addressing the frustrations of misplaced trust among friends.

• Crissle: "Please don't speak to me for any reason." [17:46]
• Kid Fury: "I have to kill you." [09:35]

Another letter from Antoine discusses the challenges of living with a new roommate amidst a breakup, prompting the hosts to offer blunt and comedic suggestions on how to handle the situation.

• Kid Fury: "Get the fuck out of my house." [105:37]
• Crissle: "You must do better." [107:00]

---

Current Events and Social Issues

60:07 – 118:27

The hosts tackle various social and political topics, including the controversial appearance of rapper Chingy at a Log Cabin Republicans event. They critique his stance, questioning his understanding of the group's political alignment and expressing skepticism about his true intentions.

• Crissle: "You're not gay or Republican, so what are you doing here?" [67:18]
• Kid Fury: "You look ridiculous. Desperate." [67:55]

Additionally, they discuss parenting choices in popular media, specifically criticizing the portrayal of children dressed in sexually suggestive costumes. The hosts advocate for age-appropriate attire and express concerns over the sexualization of minors in entertainment.

• Crissle: "I pray God's protection over all those children in that house." [126:52]
• Kid Fury: "How are you not thinking about this child's safety?" [132:47]

---

Conclusion

118:28 – End

Wrapping up the episode, Kid Fury and Crissle reflect on their discussions, emphasizing the importance of responsible pet ownership, standing up against inappropriate societal norms, and supporting one another through personal and political challenges. Their dynamic conversation leaves listeners with both laughs and food for thought, staying true to The Read's blend of humor and candidness.

• Crissle: "We're incredible, inspiring examples. And we have been that all our lives." [78:40]
• Kid Fury: "It's a great show. More adults should be watching it." [117:53]

---

Notable Quotes

• Crissle: "I'm a sleepy ass bitch." [01:58]
• Kid Fury: "I will murder you." [09:35]
• Crissle: "You're not allowed to breathe anymore." [13:02]
• Kid Fury: "Play it cool, let it go." [27:01]

---

Final Thoughts

"Best Of 2024 Pt. II" showcases Kid Fury and Crissle's ability to intertwine personal anecdotes with sharp pop culture critiques. Their unfiltered discussions offer listeners a glimpse into their lives while addressing broader societal issues with humor and honesty.

Transcript

[A]

If you dunk, Michelle, you badonka dunk your way back into the competition. RuPaul's Drag Race is back, only on MTV, with show stopping celebrity guest judges like Katy Perry, Dochi, Sam Smith, Adam Lambert, and more. The splashiest season in her story is making major waves. Raider Queen is back. I hold their face in my dainty.

[B]

Little hand because wetter is better. RuPaul's Drag Race is back.

[A]

New season tonight at 8, 7 Central on MTV. Happy?

[B]

It was so nice. I've been to, like, three or four graduation parties over this last week, but it's just something about. I was with my family last weekend in Texas, and then my friends. So many of y'all surprised me flying in that I didn't know we're going to be there, and you came, and I'm just. Just feel really loved and grateful for the people who care about me and also still really thrilled to be done with grad school. I can't believe I really did that.

[A]

Well, how are you?

[B]

I'm good. Busy. I have a puppy. And so it's been a wild week, and I'm quite tired. I've been sleeping for three hours at a time and suddenly having to vastly shift my schedule and way of life in order to accommodate her presence. But it's also great. She's incredible, and I love her motherhood already. Yeah.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Is. I'm. I'm. I feel like I'm permanently tired, but.

[A]

But it's very fulfilling. And I love her, and she looks like a teddy bear. And I love that we have two podcast doggies now, and both of their names start with Elle. Lincoln, Laney.

[B]

Yeah. She's the sweetest little thing. So. So. So every day is different. Every day is new. She's just. Every. She's learning so much. I do. She. I think the. The potty training is going very well now. She will bark when she needs to go outside. She'll like. And look towards the door, like, do you know you do you know, you have 30 seconds, ladies. Literally. Literally.

[A]

Now's the time. I love that. I love when the dogs, like, get it.

[B]

She's right. She's like. And I know you don't want me to shit all over your floor, so.

[A]

Because it requires for your pet for the dog to speak up for themselves.

[B]

Yes. Yes.

[A]

In one way or the next.

[B]

Right?

[A]

When I was a kid, our dog shadow, she would just scratch at the door. She'd come look at us, and she would scratch at the door and be like, okay, outside.

[B]

If Lanie could Do that. If she had access to the door, she would. But I. We. She's choice. Oh, my God, the funniest. So, speaking of emotions, the other day, I was viciously, ferociously high.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

And I had already put her to bed. She goes to bed three hours before I do work so that I can take her out to the bathroom one more time. And then I go to bed.

[A]

Absolutely.

[B]

And then we can get like six hours of sleep. So anyway, I'm super high and I'm processing a lot of, like, emotions and, you know, I mean, all kind of shit. I'm making connections from high edibles. So I'm real deep in my brain and I'm thinking out loud, processing out loud. After about 20 minutes, Lainey in her.

[A]

Crate goes, I love when they do that.

[B]

I said, bitch, am I bothering you?

[A]

Link does that shit, too. She won't stop, Link, there's not a puppy there.

[B]

I said, do you want me to shut up?

[A]

Does that shit to you? To this day? The first time it happened, I guess, yes.

[B]

And so I shut my ass. I said, well, I guess I'm moving this conversation to the.

[A]

You realize I was bothering you.

[B]

I know in my house, who pays bills. Not you, miss Girl. She said, bitch, I was already asleep when you came in here rambling. Either go back in the living room and do that. Cause we sleep in here. I was like, okay, bitch, got you. Copy.

[A]

Link will be in my bed, which, see, as a black mother already with a pet, right, because you're my child, but you are a dog.

[B]

Yes, you're both.

[A]

And I am a black woman. So, like, you being in my bed, already huge, already monumental.

[B]

Because we didn't even let dogs in the house when I was a kid.

[A]

Baby, the bed.

[B]

My mother would have burnt the bed last week for the first time. So normally when I pick her up from daycare, first of all, when I drop her off, it's like she can't get out of the carrier fast enough. She cannot wait to go hang out with her little homegirls.

[A]

Listen, that crack.

[B]

She breaks her neck to go hang out with her little homegirl.

[A]

Get out of here immediately.

[B]

I'm like, can Mommy get a hug? No. But so when I pick her up, they have these giant windows where you can see the dogs playing. And so normally she either sees me and keeps playing or she doesn't see me at all. But last week I went to pick her up and she saw me in the glass and started going apeshit. And she was so excited. It was like she was like, running to the door, trying to come get me, but then running back to the window so she could see me. She was just, like, losing it.

[A]

It's the first time when you dropped her off on. When you picked her up.

[B]

When I picked her up?

[A]

Oh, yeah.

[B]

When I picked her up. She was so right. I busted into tears right there at the daycare. I cried the whole way home because, like, I. I've loved you since the first time I saw. But, like, now you love me, too.

[A]

Now you know who. Yeah, she knows you're her mama.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And not just the person who, you know, she. Who house she live in, who gives her food sometimes. Right. She's like, oh, no, this is my mama.

[B]

She's like, oh, no, that's my mama. And she came to get me. You girls are safe.

[A]

She's like, oh, I'm going home. Right? Yeah.

[B]

Anyway, I cried. I want to talk about just a couple of things very briefly, very quickly, and then I'm going to move on. I want to talk about my daughter again. Obsessed. Some of you have had some questions. She is a cavapoo. She's almost 16 weeks old. She'll get up to, like, 12 to 15 pounds. Yes. She is named after BET, Nigel. Lainey. That is just. There's a lot of questions. Those are, like, the most common ones. What I want to talk about, though, is people being weird about Lainey. Part two. I talked about this before, just some of the things y'all have done. And I realized the other day that I probably should have got a less cute dog. I. I should have gotten a dog that. I mean, I love Lainey. I'm not getting rid of her or anything like that. So slow your fingers down. But she's so cute that other people can't stop themselves or can't seem to stop themselves from being weird. And for the most part, I understand it, like, she's adorable. So I let y'all have it. Please stop telling me how easy it would be, though, to kidnap my dog. Three people over the past week have come up to me while I'm with her. Oh, my God, your puppy's so cute. How old is she? Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And then they're like, oh, my gosh, she's so friendly. It would just be so easy to steal her.

[A]

I feel like someone said that to.

[B]

Me once about, I'm a steal on you. What about, why would you say that to me? One man, I was walking her on the leash, trying to walk on a leash, trying to get her to learn how to do that. And she stopped to talk to play with some man and he's all into it. And then he was like, oh my gosh, she's so cute. I just want to take her with me. I said, oh, haha. Everybody says that. This opened up the back seat of his car and was like, come here, girl. Come here.

[A]

I would have held up my phone as I dialed.

[B]

Do you want to go to prison?

[A]

Oh, I'm going to call the police.

[B]

It isn't. That isn't funny or cute to me. She's a four pound dog. And I think what it really is is that like, I'm very well aware that she would be easy to steal. That's why I'm nervous. I. I want to keep her locked up inside 24 7. But that's not good for her, right? I have to take her outside. I have to let her be part of the world. But then I have to stay super fucking vigilant when I'm outside because y'all are saying and doing weird shit like that.

[A]

People are weird.

[B]

Making little coaxing noises at my dog with the backseat of your car open. Are you serious? Now I have to pick her up and run? Now we have to run.

[A]

I mean, and the worst part about that is people do that. They do just like steal dogs up.

[B]

Off the street in places extremely cute.

[A]

So it's like, why? That's like, if you're walking home at 9pm from insert bodega and someone is walking past you and is like, oh, you're. You're so pretty. It would be so easy to like murder you right now or drag you into this nearby.

[B]

You're so fine. I just want to bind you up and take you to my fucking lair and have my way with you. What?

[A]

I guess that is something that could happen. Why do we.

[B]

Does this feel like a normal thing to say to a person? It. I mean, it creeps me out to. To the point now where I'm like, maybe I need to stop. People don't usually ask to hold her. Only one person has asked to hold her. And she was in. She lives in my building and she was taking her dog downstairs. And I was so jealous because her dog is seven, so he's very chill and acting like a normal person who's done something and been somewhere before. Lainey's acting a fool all excited, but anyway, she dropped her dog's leash so she could hold Laney. But I was like, girl, your baby is wandering around the lobby now. Your baby is wandering around the lobby because you wanted to hold my dog. I would never let a stranger in public hold her, though. And this is exactly why. Because if you just take off with her now, I have to chase you down and kill you.

[A]

Yeah, I have to a chase now.

[B]

I have to kill you.

[A]

And then when I catch you, I have to kill you.

[B]

You're not allowed to breathe anymore. Yeah, I get that. She's so cute and so small. That's why I have a lot of grace for y'all being weird about her.

[A]

But that's a walk.

[B]

There's a line. And do not.

[A]

Have you not seen other very cute dogs when you're out with Lane?

[B]

I see very cute dogs all the time. What I don't do, I might say, oh, my God, cute dog, and keep walking. I've never stopped somebody to be like, I have to talk to you about your dog. But if I did, I would never say, oh, my God, she would be so easy for me to take and raise as my own.

[A]

I promise you, 9.5 times out of 10, when I see a really cute dog in public, I don't even say anything. At most, I'll outward. I'll out loud. I'll go, aww. Or something like that as we're walking.

[B]

So many people do that.

[A]

That's it. I keep it moving.

[B]

Fine. I don't even mind you stopping us to talk about her.

[A]

I'm sure you didn't.

[B]

I mean, I. You know, I don't do great with strangers, but they love her so much. She brings people so much joy that it's actually very good for me if.

[A]

They also have a dog and the dogs are kicking it. Cool.

[B]

But see, I can't do that because she's not fully vaccinated yet.

[A]

Exactly.

[B]

So your dog can't get all up in her face.

[A]

Right.

[B]

So I have to keep her at a distance, which she hates.

[A]

Well, now we're just having conversations, right?

[B]

And. And you talking to her, but you really talking to me, but you talking to her, and it. It's weird, but she makes people happy. I get to see the best side of people, and so that is nice, But I also get to see some of their weirder sides, because why would you say to me, it would be so easy to steal your dog. It would be so easy to punch you in your fucking eye, too. But why would I say that out loud?

[A]

That's something like, you know, community, Nima.

[B]

Community, who raised y'all?

[A]

It's like, be careful out there now. You know, this dog is Small or something. And even that would be like, thanks so much for that reminder of something I already considered and has made me angry.

[B]

I know that. That's why I'm holding her to my breast in this fucking baby wrap carrier thing. That's literally why she's.

[A]

She.

[B]

I have two. I have one in gray and one in black so that they match more outfits. But I literally have those because she is tiny.

[A]

Yeah, she's a little thing, so.

[B]

Oh my God, your dog.

[A]

Oh, she would just be outside now because once that snow comes.

[B]

Right, right.

[A]

And she already can be too, too small out when it's super, super.

[B]

So we're trying to, you know, have our time outside, do all that while we can.

[A]

But she has. She got bubble coats and she.

[B]

Oh yes, she does.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

She actually has multiple.

[A]

She got layers.

[B]

She does.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[B]

But one woman literally, like I just.

[A]

Don'T to be weird.

[B]

And she's. She's a cavapoo. They're very friend. That's a very friendly breed. They love people stand people. And one woman said, she's so friendly. It's like, you're not even her mom. She'll go to anybody. And I'm like, this is the. This is the first person who told me that Laney would be easy to steal. She threw in that about she's so friendly, anybody could just take her.

[A]

Why do you see how you said that to me in real life?

[B]

I am.

[A]

And I have to process that you said that.

[B]

Am her mom. I know this is the thing. I know she's friendly. I know that she loves everybody, will talk to anybody, will go to anybody. I know that. I keep a very good close eye on her for that reason. The same reason, same thing. People who have friendly toddlers don't just let their toddlers run around and hang out with any old body cuz they know their kid will go talk to anybody.

[A]

I don't let her come up to Link. Especially if we're at home. She's like, oh my goodness, thank you. To thank you for coming to my house. Here are the toys. Throw them. Let's be friends.

[B]

And you need to do it now.

[A]

Imagine if somebody was like, oh my gosh, like she fucking hates you. It's like you've like she doesn't care about you at all.

[B]

Who are you talking to?

[A]

It's almost like she's like, she could be my dog.

[B]

You think I don't know that? I'm far more attached to her than she is to me. I've only had her for a couple of weeks. Like, we'll get there. But who are you talking to?

[A]

Why do you think this is, like, friendly conversation? My friend. A friend of mine was saying to me about her. Her child. She was saying how, I guess people in the mix, friends, family who are saying how, oh, my goodness, the child looks like nothing like you. You know, like they.

[B]

Candace. Because cam do look like his daddy.

[A]

Like, they look like the other parents.

[B]

Oh, yeah.

[A]

And I said to myself, first of all, disagree. Secondly, why would you feel like saying to a person that carried a human being in their body for 10 months.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And then had them ripped out violently? Why would you feel like it's like, oh, my gosh, like you had nothing to do with it? Why do you feel like that's like, even if this baby looks like spitting it, like, exactly like the other parent.

[B]

Yeah. I assure you, he is mine. He don't have to look at like, me for me to have birthed him.

[A]

Oh, look like his daddy, look like his mama. Such and such. These are things.

[B]

Sure. But do you have to say, girl.

[A]

It'S like you had this baby don't look shit like you. It's almost like you were just there. Are you sick?

[B]

And that might be the sort of you. Right.

[A]

I will murder you.

[B]

That's the sort of thing where you might be okay with it coming from, like friends or family or people you know?

[A]

Don't ever say this. I can't think of a living.

[B]

But you for sure cannot. A stranger come up to me talking to me like that. Who. Who are you? Who invited you to us and our business? It wasn't me. Point that nigga out, please, so I could tell them where they got me up.

[A]

I don't give a if you are this baby's godparent.

[B]

Mm. Real.

[A]

You don't tell me the person that carried this nigga around threw up, couldn't drink, couldn't smoke.

[B]

Feet swollen, no raw fish.

[A]

No swollen. And all of the other horrible things y'all keep sending me about pregnancy on TikTok. You not gonna tell me, oh, this baby don't give a fuck about. You look nothing like you, bitch. You just carried them.

[B]

He's so sweet. He'll go to anybody. Yes, but I'm his mother.

[A]

Oh, well, it's great that we're in the hospital because this is where you're gonna need to be.

[B]

Do people with very cute, like, babies and toddlers. Do other people come up to you and be like, oh, my God, your baby. I could just take him.

[A]

No, Actually, some people do.

[B]

You could.

[A]

Some people do to you.

[B]

You could just take him.

[A]

Some people do that.

[B]

Okay. And I. And here's the thing. I understand y'all are saying this with zero intent to actually steal my dog. You know, assuming I. I'm right, I'm assuming that who opened his car door. He might have really? That for the rest of you, I don't think you would actually take her. I just want you to think about what you are saying.

[A]

Exactly.

[B]

To a very nervous new mother. I already don't want her to be nowhere near y'all. I already don't want that. I have to let her go outside. It's good for her. She needs it. So I have to. So I have to. But please be careful about the words you choose to use when you are talking to me about my damn baby like that. That's all I'm saying. There's nothing she would be so easy to steal. That doesn't. That doesn't make me laugh. That doesn't warm my eyes.

[A]

Somebody's, like, talking about someone's cute baby. You meet their baby in the airport, wherever the. You're like, oh, you want to come home with me? Oh, you just come home with me.

[B]

If you don't shut your ass, pedophile. Who. Why would you say that? Why would you say that? That felt right.

[A]

I don't care about. About your intentions when it comes to this. Don't say strange things in a world where people are strange and dangerous.

[B]

Yes, it's. It's the. I'm assuming no ill intent, which is why I'm trying to be nice about this, but I'm letting y'all know now to stop saying that to me. Just don't do it.

[A]

Yeah, the dogs. The thing with, like, ever so much. She'd be so easy to steal.

[B]

So, yes. Please don't do that.

[A]

Yeah, when you told me the vibe she gave you when you met her, I was like, yeah, she's gonna be a lot like Link. Spoiled for sure. Already conceited and a little.

[B]

A little.

[A]

What's the word? Egocentric.

[B]

But she is very.

[A]

Tell me yesterday, when you were talking to your therapist, how she did Link's thing.

[B]

Oh, right, right, right. No, she. It was. It was as if the therapist was holding Zoom auditions and she was being cast in a fucking Disney Channel movie.

[A]

Yep, yep.

[B]

She.

[A]

Which she could be.

[B]

I am so beautiful, and she has so many fans. Like, I Lowkey don't even want to take her outside because the sheer number of people who are obsessed with her.

[A]

Like, the thing about it is, sweetie, gamut into it.

[B]

Yeah, I'm gonna have to get over that.

[A]

That's one thing you have. Girl baby.

[B]

That's where I was going in the past few days.

[A]

That was the one thing I forgot and didn't consider about getting a dog, especially ferociously cute one.

[B]

Right, right.

[A]

We are both. Please do not speak to me for any reason. White woman and having cute dogs. Yeah, you're not a Pokemon, girly.

[B]

Well, Pokemon Go.

[A]

Yeah. But you don't have, like, trainer battles in that game.

[B]

No, I don't. I don't. I don't.

[A]

In a typical Pokemon, when your game, when you're just going from place to place, as soon as. As soon as another trainer.

[B]

Yeah, they battle for the. Yeah, they battle for, like, the little home, spot, location type thing.

[A]

Yeah. But in a traditional game, challenge them as a traditional game. When you're walking anywhere where there's other trainers, as soon as you enter their line of sight, they stop you. Like, the game stops you. And they come up and they're like, hey, what's tea? I want to fight. And then you fight them. That's how, like, white women are with cute dogs. Like, you're just walking the dog. They see you, and they're like, exclamation point. And your whole life has to freeze for this encounter. Right?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

I hate it.

[B]

She's only three and a half pounds. So when I say everybody. Fucking toddlers, man. Everybody loves this dog. So that is a little exhausting, but it's not too bad. I knew it was gonna be like that. You know, I dox it. And it is like that all the time. So I kind of expected it, but just in real time, people coming up to me, people asking to hold her, touch her. One woman kissed her like, oh, my God.

[A]

That is where y'all are wild.

[B]

Let me take my child and go home.

[A]

You will not put your mouth on my child today, diva.

[B]

A white woman was like, baby, so, oh, no, no. It's time for us to go.

[A]

Oh, actually, no, no, we're not doing that. The thing in my bed, I'm playing video games. Maybe a final fantasy. Who cares? And I start losing. Suck my teeth. She looked back at me like, clean it up. I don't know what the attitude is, but it's disturbing me. I feel uncomfortable.

[B]

She's exact. She is the same. I was like, oh, okay. I guess I should.

[A]

Wow.

[B]

Move my. I'm like, I'm having breakthroughs right now. Lainey.

[A]

There are other rooms in that she.

[B]

Was like, do you know, like the room you came from? You can just go back. Don't come in here bothering me when I'm asleep. I said, okay. Okay.

[A]

Wow.

[B]

Truly the dog for me. Obsessed with her. Finally we're at the point now where she will actually get in her playpen. Because at first she was absolutely not having it.

[A]

Yeah, I get it.

[B]

But now she has learned to jump right out of it. So I had to order a taller one.

[A]

There you go.

[B]

Like, that lasted two weeks.

[A]

I don't know.

[B]

Two weeks. Two weeks.

[A]

Maybe instead of people emailing you abuse advice, they should have said, hey, friend. Not sure if someone reminds you or not, but dogs can jump.

[B]

It's insane how high up she can get though. Like, it's two feet tall. You're nowhere near that. So how is it that you are.

[A]

Able to big leap, honey?

[B]

As soon as. So the first time she did it, I said, thank you for letting me know that you can do this if it was a cat, because I'm getting your ass. You are getting a taller play pin lit the rooftop.

[A]

Cats fly. Dogs can jump.

[B]

I don't even think I would try to keep a cat.

[A]

Cats more so cute.

[B]

Put into a playpen. But, you know, she's doing well. She. It's just. I. I look at her and it's just really every day she is learning something new, doing something new. She's just amazing.

[A]

She's so much work deep. You're digging into this puppy.

[B]

She has some outfits coming in and she's gonna do a little photo shoot. Are.

[A]

Okay, I'm waiting. I hate to say this. I'm waiting because of my nerve. You know what? I just won't.

[B]

I was gonna say not you. Not with Link Balenciaga down to the socks. Please don't do that.

[A]

And you know it, bitch. And we going shopping when I get back from this next show.

[B]

Please do me.

[A]

What's tea. No, you're right.

[B]

At least I stuff.

[A]

But she's like. She looks like a teddy bear.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

No.

[B]

Lainey is she. She is just the cutest thing. And I will show y'all. But she has. You know, she's getting her things ready. And plus, you know.

[A]

Yeah. You're getting.

[B]

I wanted some. A couple of weeks at least. Just me and her just figuring it out. She in the middle of Antoinette's birthday party.

[A]

And I know that's.

[B]

I said that's what y'all get for invite. Well, I didn't say that. I was actually deeply embarrassed. But you know, when you invite A puppy to a birthday party. Things happen and everybody was super cool about. No. By the time I took her downstairs and by the time I came back, my friends had already cleaned it all up, and they were like, she's a puppy. We get it. So. But I was still like, oh, my God, Mama taught you better than this.

[A]

Of course you are. Yes. But you also are all grown. Like, I would honestly gag if you were like. And then so and so was like, how who it brought, you know, like, nobody was gonna freak out about it, but, yeah, that's natural reaction.

[B]

Yeah. I feel like every.

[A]

I'm loving this.

[B]

She's all I have to talk about. She is taking up all of my time, all of my mental energy.

[A]

If you pets are great.

[B]

They are. If you want to get off your phone, get a fucking puppy.

[A]

Pets are so good.

[B]

Because let me tell you who is not here for me. Not paying attention to her. If she's here, I need to be focused on what she has going on. So. But anyway, it's going great, and that will wrap up this week's episode. Oh, and another thing. Sorry. Sorry. I know I've been a dog mom for, like, 10 days, so take everything I say with a tablespoon of salt. However, I have noticed that there are a lot of similarity, similarities between raising a puppy and having a baby. A lot. Not exactly the same. I know they do hate it. However, there are a lot of similarities simply with regards to the level of care they need and how dependent they are on you for literally everything. However, that's not what I'm here to talk about. I'm not here to talk about how I have a newborn and y'all need to respect me as a mother. That's not it at all. What I would like to say is a lot of you have children for the same reason you get pets. And both of those reasons are fucked up. A lot of people over this past week, as they've learned about Lainey, have contacted me to talk to me about the way that they train their dogs, the way they raise their dogs, the way they, you know, potty trained or, you know, taught to sit, follow commands, whatever else. Y'all are abusing these dogs. You're abusing these dogs.

[A]

Oh, God.

[B]

You're cussing these dogs out for shitting in the middle of a party, but they're three months old, and shitting in the middle of a party is what they do. You yelling at the dog, smashing the dog's face into the shit, hitting him, beating him for a natural bodily Defense.

[A]

Y'all are telling people that you're dealing.

[B]

With unsolicited, telling me how they raise their dogs, and I'm like, this is actually abuse. Do you. You're teaching your dog? Yes, but not what you want to teach them. And so.

[A]

So wait, you know about us? And you're doing this?

[B]

And you're doing this. You tell him, oh, well, this is how I got him to do this. This is how I got her to do that. I'm not going. And again, I've been doing this so week, but I feel pretty confident in saying I'm not going to abuse Layne because she is behaving like a puppy. But y'all do that to your puppies the same way you do it to your children, because you think that's the way they're supposed to be raised. And you're doing it unconsciously a lot of the time. That's what I've noticed more than anything else. Not really. The similarities between puppies and newborns have been illustrated many times. The fact that y'all have both in order to abuse them because you finally have some power over somebody is what I've seen discussed much less. Y'all are bad at being dog owners, pet owners, just like you're bad at being parents. Those are both true.

[A]

The gag is we were almost out of here, and she just.

[B]

It just occurred to me. It just occurred to me, right? Like I said. And now another thing, because I have been floored by how many people have reached out to tell me that almost.

[A]

Made it out alive.

[B]

Y'all are like, you have to be her ass girl.

[A]

My bitch said, oh, actually, before we leave, I'm gonna cleave your head off.

[B]

Stop abusing these animals. They did not ask to belong to you the same way these children didn't.

[A]

You a simple goo.

[B]

You probably had to put more effort into having the pet than you did the kid, which is all shade, but you probably did. You probably at least tried to have a pet, whereas these babies just showed up for a lot of you. But in both cases, they deserve for y'all to grow the fuck up and unlearn the horrible things that were done to you. Please do not unconsciously repeat the parenting mistakes that were made with you, with your animals and children. That's what I've seen more than anything else.

[A]

If I can just.

[B]

Oh, yeah, go ahead, go ahead. Because you're a mom.

[A]

Cause the thing a little bit about that is that, like, what you might be forgetting is with your pet and with your children, they Will more than likely at some point, have to be around other pets and children.

[B]

Come on. Come on.

[A]

And if your pet or your child fucks with mine. Cause of what? You see how we have problems. So that's it? That's what you say?

[B]

I mean, in New York City, you have to have licenses, and you can be held legally responsible for what your pet does to other people and other animals, which is supposed to be an incentive to make sure that you raise them in a way that allows for them to be socialized properly with other human beings and other animals. Essentially, you are being tasked with the responsibility of raising a responsible pet, which is, quite frankly, what you are supposed to be doing anyway.

[A]

It's just what you're supposed to do.

[B]

Why do you have a dog? Why did you get a puppy? To beat it. I look at Lainey, I cannot imagine being like, I know you're three and a half months old and three and a half pounds. However, I believe belt to ass is what you deserve for pissing in the living room. No, She's a baby and she's new to my home. It will take her some time, but I have to be on top of it. I know the rules already. I'm the big grown one, so I have to teach her. It takes patience, and you have to remain calm. But I don't want her to be scared of her body. I don't want her to be scared of, like, oh, I feel the need to poop. Now I'm scared. I feel the need to pee. Now I'm scared. And I don't want her to be scared of me if I do poop. If I do pee, that big crazy bitch who fills up the food bowl is going to come in here and holler and make me feel bad. Make me feel afraid. That is what y'all are doing to these animals. Please fucking stop. I can my nigga stunned at how many people jumped out of nowhere to tell me how bad they are at having dogs. I said, oh, this is too much for me. I gotta go.

[A]

I do holler at Link. I will say I do holler at Link, but Link is not a puppy no more. And, like, I only holler at Link when she's.

[B]

Lainey doesn't know what the rules are. She just got here. I'm talking about people who are telling me how they trained their puppies. I will not be beating her. I will not be yelling at her. We will figure it out the hard way. If I had to gentle parent this dog, so fucking be it. And a Lot of y'all use excuses that sound exactly like the excuses your parents used to justify the terrible way they raised you. I just want y'all to sit and think about it for half a goddamn second.

[A]

Mm.

[B]

Multiple. When I tell you at least six, seven people, like, dude, they're animals. Chimed in with calm down advice that is essentially abuse. I'm not.

[A]

I don't understand how.

[B]

No, I'm not doing that. If Laney is sick but you know something and scratching shit up, that's a different conversation. But, no, I'm not hitting her. I'm not. I'm not.

[A]

If Lainey was a human baby, I'm like you. I don't. I feel like the same thing would drive away.

[B]

It would. Yeah, they do that. Babies in the process. Oh, my God. And again, the parallels. So many people, when they talk about potty training, their children talk about how they simply beat their child every time they had a mess in their diaper or pull up, and that's how the child got potty trained. Huh. Okay, well, there's more than one ways to skin a cat, but you are really, really not teaching your offspring what you want to be teaching them. This is not the most effective way. All you're asking for is obedience. You don't want to clean it up, but nobody told your big, stupid ass to go get a pet. You didn't want a puppy. You didn't want accidents in your house. Don't get a fucking puppy. This is what they do. You don't want somebody shitting in their Pampers. Don't have a baby. It's part of the process. Do you get that? They're learning. You're the one who already knows, so act like it.

[A]

Trying to think of the last thing I yelled at Link about.

[B]

Was it chewing something up? Oh, probably barking at the neighbors.

[A]

Probably Charlie. Oh, yeah, but that's always just like, ay.

[B]

And then she said, the dog across the. I almost sit across the street. The dog across the hall from me is bad about that, too. When she hears my keys in the door, she start going apeshit. And I can always hear somebody. Like I said, calm down.

[A]

The lady next door. That nigga is running her racket. But I know, like, it is.

[B]

Yeah, it's odd behavior.

[A]

Breathe. Our breeds define certain behavior in dogs or whatever. And all those kinds of things, you have to, like, know how to train your animal. Like, they're not looking to upset you or make a mess or anything like that. In fact, as far as, like, the pooping things go, if you look like the basics up. Dogs don't like shitting inside.

[B]

Literally. They don't want to lose. Lani was already crate trained, but she do not shit in her crate because she don't want to be that close to her own shit.

[A]

There could when they were they considered home, right? They the most. They don't want to sit there.

[B]

But, you know, over. She has gotten better and better. Yesterday we had no accidents at all. And that's because every three hours, mama is taking her outside so she can run around and piss. Like, literally, I'm doing that because I don't want to have to stop what I'm doing to put her in the crate and then break out the enzyme cleaner and the Resolve Ultra Duty Pets stain and spray because she done decided to leave four little tiny turds on my car. Like, I do that because I want to make less work for myself and I want to teach her where to go. But that is part of this.

[A]

I liked. It wasn't like, some of that stuff wasn't frustrating when she was home.

[B]

Of course it is.

[A]

When I come home and it was toilet papers all over there, all over the place. But it was also like, I'm responsible for a living thing. And there's something like a little fulfilling about that. And no cuddles. So, like, I'm okay. I don't know what's wrong with something.

[B]

I don't either. We're going very slow. She has a playpen. At first, she wasn't fucking with it at all. Now she'll sit in it. But she's still not really cool with me going from room to room. So we're working on me being able to go do my things around the house, and then I'll start running errands, you know, go downstairs and come right back up. See how she deals with that. But again, teaching requires a great deal of patience.

[A]

Patience is the key.

[B]

It is. You really have got. And you need to understand developmentally what you're dealing with.

[A]

And if you think about it, it's.

[B]

Not like, no, not crazy, not complicated or complicated. Not at all. Not at all. You need to look up how to properly train your dog. And if YouTube or, you know, influencers on TikTok or whatever is not enough, then you need to outsource it to the professionals. There are plenty of people who do this for a living who can help you. Doesn't. Just because you have a dog doesn't mean you automatically intrinsically know the best way to care for it or train it. So reach out for help. But you're. You are abusing these animals. I said, this is why adoption agencies have the rules they have. Because you niggas will pull up to them people and be like, I plan to take sticks to ass the first time this bitch have an accident in my house.

[A]

I cannot.

[B]

That's why them people don't let y'all have dogs. That's exactly why. That's exactly why. Cause a lot of y'all adopt dogs to abuse them. Yikes, yikes, yikes, yikes. Do better, please.

[A]

Link is like, my favorite thing.

[B]

Like, Lainey is a little ball of n. Like, she's a ball of fluff. I'm not fucking beating her.

[A]

Shady. Yes. Mischievous. Quite a bit, anyway. But she's a dog.

[B]

A dog. Like an innocent puppy at that. I haven't had Laney for 10 years, you know, and now she wilding out. And even then I would be like, what else is going on? Do you not feel good? Are you getting older? Literally, something's going on. What do supernova mama say? Misbehavior is communicating unmet needs. Yes. That's like her tagline. And that is so true. Misbehavior. People and animals don't just misbehave. Out of nowhere, something's going on. So you could just try being inquisitive about the status of your dog, their development, what they're going through, as opposed to this fucking bullshit. Like, you niggas have to do better.

[A]

Be, like, really nice to them. Feed them, play with them, and take. Just don't.

[B]

Please don't hit them.

[A]

Like, start there.

[B]

You know, it's just insane. Like, you do have to. You have to put work into it. Lany and I last night went to bed at 9:45. We got up at 2am for a potty break. We got up again at 5:30am because she needed another potty break. And then we got up for good at 7:15 so she could go to daycare. Do I like getting up multiple times throughout the night? No. I'm a sleepy ass bitch. But do I do it? Because that's my daughter and she needs to learn. Yes. Okay, so maybe just try that out.

[A]

Hey, y'all, I don't know about you, but maybe this dating app fatigue thing the Internet is talking about is real because I'm tired from swiping this way to that way. How many likes are too many likes? Is. Is that the bubble you tap? Should I send a message? I'm nervous. Oh, they sent. A message is two words. Well, I don't know how to respond to that. It's too much. It's too much. And a lot of dating apps are all about pursuing someone else. But there's one that's carved out a space for you to find yourself on Field. An app where curious people come to connect. You have the breathing room to explore your own desires and go on a journey wherein the person you discover is yourself, you, friend. Because if you can't love on you, if you can't know all about you, if you can't get into you how anybody else supposed to, right on field you have options, maybe more than you even think. With 20 plus sexuality and gender identities to choose from, you have the freedom to explore who you are and what you like in ways that you've never even imagined. Plus, there's no pressure to swipe. If you happen to skip someone's profile, you can always go back or undo a dislike, all at no extra cost. If you're looking for friends, connections, all kinds of things, and all kinds of forms, Field is the place to do it. So download Field that's F E E L D. Get it on the App Store or Google Play, Go have some fun, Meet yourself and maybe someone fun.

[B]

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[A]

So Megan Stallion released a new song last week. It's called Hiss. She had teased the record maybe a week or so prior. Not too long before that, I had actually seen a photo she posted on her Instagram of Like the Seth where she was in the egg. So I knew that she had something coming to follow Cobra up soon. And it was this Megan said on an Instagram live video, I think late last year, she was like, I got something for everybody who's been calling me. Here I come. Something to that effect. If you've been calling me out, good or bad, here I come. So I kind of expected she was gonna talk her shit on this song right before I heard it.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Then there was like a little clip that came out maybe the day before the song, which is just the intro where she just says. She says, I want to just kick this shit off by saying, fuck y'all. I ain't gonna clear my name on the motherfucking thing.

[B]

I lived.

[A]

Every time I get mentioned, one of y'all bitch ass niggas get 24 hours of attention. I'm gonna get this shit off my chest and lay it to rest. Now, that part was released by itself. And so it was very much like, okay, yeah, this is the song. I would like to read the lyrics of the song. Okay, okay. And we will do. I will be reading song lyrics today. Don't worry, I won't have to read many. Hiss begins as follows. I feel like Mariah Carey got these niggas so obsessed My pussy so famous Might get managed by Kris Jenner next He can't move on, can't let it go he hooked nose full of that Tina Snow and since niggas need Megan help to make money Bitch come be my hobby all you bitches is weak on the Bible Talking shit from where no one can find you I can never be judged by a bitch that was dancing making our killa go viral I'm sexy as fuck and I'm freaky Get whoever I want Eenie meenie why the fuck would I stay with a nigga that's weak in the sheets and don't know how to please me? Okay, let me skip ahead. Step forward and a half. Okay, next few lines are mostly about N, who think that because she goes from there, she literally says, bodies on bodies on bodies on bodies. So the next couple of lines are essentially her saying, like, N think that they could say, oh, well, this person fucked and that person fucked, and I got this many bodies on me and that somehow is going to lower my value. Actually, you're promoting me for free. You're keeping my name in circulation. I'm making more money because of this. So thank you. I don't know if you knew. I didn't come out like on a Madea Live play, sleep. Yes, please loves me. I came out shaking my ass and saying, I love to fuck. So, like, I know, like, misogyny and sex shaming is like, typical, like, low hanging fruit for niggas. But girly, it's not hitting the way you think that it is. It's not hitting the way that I do. So then we get to these hoes, don't be mad at Megan. These holes mad at Megan's Law. I don't really know what the problem is, but I guarantee y'all don't want me to start.

[B]

I love that. I mean, I don't know.

[A]

There's just something so Southern and country about saying, guarantee you don't want me to start.

[B]

And like, sister, you're fully starting. What you mean, we don't want you to start? You just told these niggas they not mad at you, they mad at Megan's Law. Half of the industry should have felt that.

[A]

Right? But that's the point. You don't want me to start with you because you're not mad at me.

[B]

I have like.

[A]

Like, I don't know what the issue is. I don't know what it is, but I know you don't want to start. You don't want me to start with you and I having issues because you not mad at me. I didn't do nothing to you.

[B]

You mad at the feds for making you register and tell your neighbors, bitch.

[A]

You a p. Ssy. You never finna check me every chance you get, Bitch, your weak ass won't address me. Bitches swear they G but the G must stand for goofy. I also love that one. When the fuck did all the gangsta n. S turn to groupies? Everybody want to kick it when you ain't a threat. These niggas don't like me because they know I'm on they neck. She then goes into another spoken word dis transition. I love this song. Also does not have a hook. And it's like three minutes, something long.

[B]

Yeah, no, she just. She literally said, I'm going to get it off my chest and then I'm done. Like, we don't need no refrain. We don't need no hook because I just gonna say it and then I'm out.

[A]

Verse 2 n Ain't you here? I ain't scared of dick. Any man going against me, I handle shit. I'm a Teflon don in the courtroom they be throwing that dirt doe shit stick. This is very clearly related to, like, from the Tory shit to the Carl 1501 from that record label. All that other stuff, it's like, girly. I'm not really afraid of all them.

[B]

Fake bloggers during the trial. Just saying anything. Yeah.

[A]

All these little rap niggas. So fraud. Xanax be they hardest bar. These niggas hate on bbl. Walk around with the same stars.

[B]

That was about Drake directly.

[A]

Real curvy, no etching. Niggas fight to get in my section. Let's just pause.

[B]

Oh, God, this is so good.

[A]

One of my points at large in this whole thing is it feels like she. If we were on, like, I was about to say the Promenade, if we were at school.

[B]

Promenade. Is that a mall? It's a mall in Tulsa. And we used to be in that bitch.

[A]

If we were, like, at school, it's giving like she walked past Nikki Easter, flipped her hair, and then she went and cussed Drake out. So it's not like.

[B]

Yes, yes, exactly. This was very much directed at the niggas. Specifically Drake to me, far more as soon as I heard it all the way through.

[A]

Far more than that lady.

[B]

Oh, she again. The bar about Megan's Law applies to so many fucking people.

[A]

My God.

[B]

But all this about, you know, mocking women when you got the same BBL surgery that they got.

[A]

Cosplay gangsters, fake ass accents posted in another nigga hood like a bad bitch.

[B]

Oh, God, it was so good.

[A]

This nigga said, because you have to remember, Drake came out of nowhere talking about she lied about shots, but she ain't a stallion or whatever, but she's still established whatever the fuck that line was.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

And they were just. He's talking about ass shots, girl.

[B]

Shut up.

[A]

So Mama was like, I don't really know why when you walking around looking just like her.

[B]

Yeah. No etching. I don't have no etching. You, however, real curvy. And them abs okay. Cause the wall not bending in my pictures.

[A]

Jesus.

[B]

Glory to God. Oh, this was like that.

[A]

The heat. Like, she turned up the heat on the N. Did.

[B]

Did. Came from them.

[A]

Like this whole thing has basically just turned into oh, Nicki versus But the N got heat, so.

[B]

Absolutely. Did called y'all bitch niggas over and.

[A]

Over, said, y'all, these niggas don't have fans. They box. These bitches don't have ass. They shots. And they still tune in if they fans or not. These blogs get paid to lie. Y'all talk shit and be broke as fuck. Bottom line is, I'm still rich, dude. Megan bad. And I'm still good. Bringing up who might have fucked the bottom line as they still would.

[B]

None of you niggas was wifey material. None of you niggas was worth all this drama. None of y'all was hitting it raw. You mad I'm not one of your baby mamas? You mad? Cause I'm fine. I got my titties out my ass. I don't give a fuck. And when I find out you did me wrong, I'm leaving you. Like, literally. I don't see how that lady took this. Okay, all right, all right. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. It just does. It's not curling all the way over. And that's. That's going to come up over and over again as we get through this story. This is the reaction.

[A]

I thought the song was over, like, a while back. She still. She came through that door in the video and she was like, oh, no, I'm not done. Bat bitch in a walls ain't been there. When I tell you those photo names start trending, why every time one of y'all Z List hoes do an interview, I get mentioned like, told you to.

[B]

Download JPEI if you miss him that much.

[A]

What? Who you niggas is typing for nothing or the Internet. Type that shit to me. Write him a letter or something. She said, say, bitch ass nigga. Don't type me down now. Don't write me. Download jpeg. Since y'all niggas got so much to say or schedule a conjugal visit or something.

[B]

It just makes sense you love Tori so much. Free Tory, this, this, that. Go get in touch with that nigga. Why are you talking to me? I can't get in touch.

[A]

Show him some love.

[B]

I can't Conn download jpeg. They got you.

[A]

Send him some honey barbecue Fritos or something.

[B]

Like, nigga, schedule a conjugal visit. Get you some fleet.

[A]

That song came out.

[B]

Yep.

[A]

Personally, opinion wise over here. It's great.

[B]

I had a good time.

[A]

The beat, the flow, the audacity, the way that she just basically lined up everybody who had something to say, so many of y'all the fuck nowhere. And said, here. Here's a taste for you. Here's just a little tiny bit for you. I haven't even bitten you yet. I'm just making my presence known. I'm just letting you know, bitch. Yeah, I heard you. And I do this. What's up?

[B]

And that's what she said when she called into the Breakfast Club. She was. When Charlamagne asked her what's the meaning behind the title. She said, when a snake is finna beat your ass, basically, it hits first to let you know, like, I'm not playing with you. It would behoove you to leave me the fuck alone. Like, right. It's a warning shot. And that, baby, I would. Anyway. Anyway. The fact that this 41 year old woman thinks making fun of a 6 foot tall person for having a bigger foot than she has is really indicative to me of just how goddamn stupid this whole thing is. Of course her foot is bigger than yours. She's almost a foot taller than you are. So where exactly is the insult in calling me Bigfoot? Like, yeah, I have a Bigfoot. You have a bigfoot. I think of it.

[A]

About the size, I mean. Yeah, I guess that makes sense.

[B]

What else could it possibly be? Like, it's just very small.

[A]

Just because she's tall and so is Bigfoot. That. And then it was like, now we're talking about your little. Your literally.

[B]

Well, did you see the.

[A]

But now that you say it and I think about the artwork, I'm like, oh, I guess.

[B]

And that fucking shitty AI picture she posted on her stories of like a Bigfoot monster.

[A]

I didn't look at any of that.

[B]

So she posted like a Bigfoot, Like a female Bigfoot. It had titties, basically, and it had like bottles of alcohol scattered around it.

[A]

And I think I know exactly what you're talking about. Yeah, that person has also like gone rollerblading on like through Venice Beach. I think I know what you're talking about.

[B]

No, this was. Well, I don't know. I don't know. Cause I don't know what other reference you're talking about.

[A]

Oh, if it was AI, maybe. I know there was like some. Never mind.

[B]

The point being this to me seemed from the very beginning with the artwork and everything, the whole, oh, you have a big foot. Like, oh, look at my cute little dainty pink boot inside of this giant bitch footprint. It's like, who cares that her foot is bigger than yours? What does that really mean? And when I asked that on the Internet, a bunch of people told me that apparently tall women get clowned all the time and called like manly and people make fun of them for having big hands, big feet, and try to make it like you're less of a woman than a smaller or more petite person.

[A]

That makes sense.

[B]

Which, I mean, I guess people do that, but that's, that's so fucking stupid to me that I would have, I just would have never. I would have never conceived of that. As an insult, of course. You have bigger feet than I do. You're nine fucking inches taller than I am. I'm like.

[A]

And just.

[B]

I'm just like, okay, we're not even through the verse. We're not even through the verse.

[A]

I mean, I get it. I mean, I get what? That sort of rhetoric coming from men, you know, Because I can see men or masculinity feeling challenged by women, by a tall woman, especially on height. And so it's like, how can I sort of try to devalue you? Which Megan mentions on her song. Not directed. Not connected specifically through height, but just the intent to devalue a woman based on all kinds of things. But, yeah, that makes sense, I guess. But it's just like, from another woman that's not fucking your man. I guess it hits in a weird way.

[B]

Well, the tall girls have been saying that the short girls have been doing this all their lives, so. But I'm not surprised. There are a lot of women who will.

[A]

But don't niggas, like shorter girls try to. You have to be with them for.

[B]

Well, that's the thing. Like, ugh, tall girls, they are men. And I'm a dainty little princess. And I have tiny hands and tiny feet and a tiny little girl voice. Daddy, don't you want me? I'm just a pretty little girl. Stop.

[A]

I hate it. I hate it, I hate it, I hate it.

[B]

Stop. Yeah, it's uncomfortable, isn't it? Because. What are you trying to say, you big grown bitch? Sorry. I'm gonna let you get through the rest of the verse. I'm gonna try to just not say nothing, but this pissed me off so bad. It's horrible.

[A]

I didn't even really process it until that. Until, like, you're as this, like.

[B]

Well, I mean, I didn't fully process it either. Cause I'm just like, this is so fucking stupid. What's the joke? And then half of my followers are like, oh, no. People do this to tall women. Like, this is a way to try to masculinize us and make us as if we're not really women. Like, which is just so fucking preposterous. But.

[A]

But later on in this same song, you try to throw shade for the niggas she's ran through.

[B]

So, like, the contradictions are all up and through this. All up and through it. She's broke, but she's paying $250,000 for a verse. So which one is it? Both. People can't do that. Where? The foot with no scar. But You a bullet fragment, bitch. I'm sorry, I'm sorry. Go ahead, Go ahead.

[A]

Go ahead, bitch.

[B]

Fall off.

[A]

Get up on your good foot. Which is obviously a reference to her being shot in her foot, which I love that the intent was very clear when the snippet came out. And then by the time the song came out, we were talking about glass and. Oh, well, how did you get shot? Okay, girl.

[B]

Right?

[A]

Still ain't talk Red Ruby. Trying to steal a sauce. I said get up on my.

[B]

Do you get it? Trying to steal the sauce.

[A]

Yeah. Because there's sauce sometimes in cookbooks to cook with. But really I'm a sweetie pie. Which I feel like is a reference to the sweetest pie song. P R T T Y. But I'm P E T T Y. Her last name is Petty, the man she married, which I'm sure she was.

[B]

Again, rapist.

[A]

Um, why did you lie about your lipo fucking your best man Crazy. You the type though. You was lying to the queen that you lying to the king. Gayle.

[B]

That's where I screamed. That was so terrible. That was so, so bad.

[A]

I think that's my favorite part.

[B]

It's so terrible. You went lying to the kid.

[A]

Damn. No, for like. I'm not even gonna hold you. Like I'm gonna give you a point for that one, though. Not cause it's good, but just cause it made me laugh.

[B]

It was terrible.

[A]

Like. And you already referenced.

[B]

We already heard. Yeah. So again. Again. The barbs wrote. The barbs wrote this.

[A]

Oh, man. That shit made me laugh. Okay. Okay. Apparently Chingy has been booked to perform at some of an LGBT Republican log cabin.

[B]

You never heard of the Log Cabin Republicans?

[A]

Why would I have ever heard of that?

[B]

I mean, I have. I don't know. They've been around a long time. They're the gay Republicans. They've been around for a very long time. They're just.

[A]

Donald Trump Jr. Is gay.

[B]

No, these people are speaking at the gay Republicans event. But the Log Cabin Republicans have been around for a very long time.

[A]

This is the dumbest shit. Why are they right?

[B]

The Republicans cannot stand them. Are actively campaigning to get rid of their rights. But they.

[A]

Donald Trump, I guess. Well, you want them to still vote.

[B]

Yeah, I mean, I think homophobia is pretty difficult to float by these days. It's more like transphobia now is the. Is what the Republicans are really focusing on. And a lot of cisgender queer people are very anti trans. So they don't have no problem with that anti trans rhetoric. All you need to do Is not be homophobic.

[A]

You know, it says lgbt.

[B]

Oh, well, you know, they just throw everything in there.

[A]

Rally for the.

[B]

I don't know what to tell you, because it.

[A]

The.

[B]

The group contradicts itself. What do you mean? Gay Republicans? Like, yeah, why you're.

[A]

That in itself right there.

[B]

Choosing to vote Republican when Republicans are. If they could exterminate you right now, they would. So, like, what are you doing?

[A]

That's how I grew up feeling when I would hear Cuban Republican.

[B]

I mean, I'd be like, black Republican Mark Robinson. Why one, you know called himself a black Nazi. Yikes.

[A]

You know, sometimes demons can't help themselves. Can't help but show themselves, you know?

[B]

Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. That's true, man.

[A]

That's one of them.

[B]

He really.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

Anyway, that. We'll get there. Chingy.

[A]

Red, white, and rock. The Log Cabin Republicans upcoming event should.

[B]

Have been red, white, and rock hard.

[A]

Said red and white and crack Rock, red, white, and crack.

[B]

I've tickled myself. Oh, that's a good one. Oh, okay. That was better.

[A]

Okay, so Chingy is one of the people on this flyer. He is literally sitting here next to Donald Trump Jr. And that crazy Kimberly lady and some other white people I don't care about right now. So obviously, Chingy wanted some money. It does make sense that he's performing at. So, okay, they commented about this, and he said on Instagram, I'm gonna say this one time. My job is to perform, and I get paid to perform, not car about politics. Now, y'all find some nails to do with your time. You could just spell it the way that it is. Like, we know you have an accent.

[B]

No, he. He's not gonna let that go.

[A]

Someone responded and said, just tell us that you down bad and the culture would rally around you.

[B]

No, we wouldn't.

[A]

That's true.

[B]

Not just for that. A lot of niggas is down, bae. You got to do better than that.

[A]

That's very true. You having a shucking jive for people who hate you, and your people ain't a flex, homeboy. To which Chini responds, you can't be down bad when you just bought a 500k house, pimp. Those people don't hate me because they love my music. Music isn't racist, and that's how I play it. All this nonsense y'all creating bothers me none. I'm performers. Whether these people political, homosexual, or whatever, they all love music. I have classic records they all love, and I will perform them for them. So I hope that helps. You understand that my job as an artist is to perform and make timeless music. That I did.

[B]

No, no, no, no. Not timeless. I was. I was gonna let you have it, but your sound, your music, it actually has a very specific time that it takes me back to. And if you weren't there in that early 2000s kind of haze of fuckery and mayhem, then you just weren't there. But I think whoever said I think you simply needed the money, and you should just say that I think they were onto something. I think they were.

[A]

He's saying he just bought a $500,000 house. So I'm like, okay. So, all right. Assuming that what you're saying, expensive of.

[B]

A house, though, girl, it's not that.

[A]

So let's say it's not that you're down bad financially. Let's say it's not that you're a Republican or you're a racist. So then the only other thing I could. The only other thing I could see as an option here is stupid.

[B]

That's the thing.

[A]

It would just have to be stupid. You can't possibly think that any of these people were just like, I have to hear right there at the log cabin. Nobody cares about none of your music that bad. Like, these people don't hate me because they love my music. They don't give a good God damn about your goddamn music, nigga. So, yeah, it must be stupid because you're clearly not aware of time after time after time after time, the way that Republicans fish out any black celebrity or former celebrity that is willing to show they face so that they can say, look, black people here. Nobody, nigga.

[B]

Yep.

[A]

I want for you. Has this happened yet? I want for you to look in a crowd when you perform Holiday Inn or whatever the fuck, and count the people. Count all of the gay white faces in the crowd rapping the lyrics back to you. I want you to just check out how many people who are present that allegedly love your music, love it enough to know the damn lyrics. Don't nobody give a fuck about your music, nigga. Yeah, you're filling the nigga seat. And if you're okay with that because it comes with a check, that's your business. Don't be coming up here talking about music is not racist. And you have classic records. Both of those things are false.

[B]

Yeah. And we can't.

[A]

Neither one of those things are true because you don't.

[B]

You don't put out new music anymore. As far as I know, you still doing right there.

[A]

You can't cancel homeboys in outer space. It'll come on, right? Nobody watching no more.

[B]

I think I would rather niggas think I was broke than stupid.

[A]

Same.

[B]

I would rather y'all think, Damn, Crystal just really needed that $5,000, and so she didn't even Google Log Cabin Republicans, even though the name alone would have me thinking. No, I don't think I need to. I don't think I should. But does Chingy even know what a Republican is? Has Chingy ever voted? Do we know that he knows anything at all about our electoral process? Like, I don't. I can't take anything away from you because I already don't support you. So there's just. You just look ridiculous. Desperate.

[A]

Yeah, this isn't about support or disappointment.

[B]

You're not gay or Republican, so what are you doing here?

[A]

I don't think he's Republican, but I do feel like at the same time, girl, you not convincing nobody that you were just like, oh, they called and they told me how much the chicken head changed their lives. And I was just like, who am I to not show up? No, bitch, they offered you some money, and you wanted it down bad or not. That's why you're going ho. So I don't know why you on here on the Internet making stuff up, talking about your music is timeless.

[B]

They needed a black face to stick up here and say, see, black people vote Republican too. And you said, I'll be that face. Can you PayPal me before the week is up? And that's that.

[A]

You better go find a Basquiat skirt and shut your ass up.

[B]

See, that's. I was literally about to say, I hope you get the same treatment Chrisette Michelle got. But Chrisette had a career when she performed for Trump. We can't. We can't say the same. It's just gonna have to. But then I saw that he dropped out after all the backlash. He was like, okay, you know what? Fuck it.

[A]

You might as well did it. What difference was it gonna make? Did you have another. Were you booked for Rolling Loud? The same people was the voice on the line. There's something like, you might as well just wait and did it at this point. Nigga, you already look crazy.

[B]

Oh, nevermind. TMZ said he is not dropping out.

[A]

Yeah, that makes sense.

[B]

And he's gonna party with Kid Rock as well.

[A]

Oh, I would rather do, like, anything. I would go right down to the Grove and ask the Nike store if they have application.

[B]

I'll just turn tricks. What are you talking about? OnlyFans.com immediately. Immediately. What?

[A]

What the fuck?

[B]

I'm getting a pedicure and I'm doing feet pics. I'm finna start being a hoe. I'm finna start being a hoe. Tmz says for everybody calling him a has been chingy kicked off his comeback tour earlier this year with the track new beginnings.

[A]

That's too easy. Like, three jokes just wrote themselves. I have nothing to say. Shut up. Fuck are you talking?

[B]

You had to tell us that he kicked off his comeback tour because nobody noticed because nobody gave a shit. Back in march or whenever this song came out. Like, never heard this song, not one day in my life.

[A]

This is the new beginning you wanted, Nicki.

[B]

This is the comeback tour.

[A]

This is headlining the republican faggot log cabin retreat.

[B]

All right, all right.

[A]

I can say it.

[B]

They're gonna get you out of here. They're gonna get you right out of here.

[A]

Hey, y'all. I don't know about you, but maybe this dating app fatigue thing the Internet is talking about is real. Cause I'm tired from swiping this way to that way. How many likes are too many likes? Is that the bubble you tap? Should I send a message? I'm nervous. Oh, they sent a message. It's two words. Well, I don't know how to respond to that. It's too much. It's too much. A lot of dating apps are all about pursuing someone else, but there's one that's carved out a space for you to find yourself. Field on field, an app where curious people come to connect. You have the breathing room to explore your own desires and go on a journey wherein the person you discover is yourself, you, friend. Because if you can't love on you, if you can't know all about you, if you can't get into you, how anybody else supposed to, right? On field, you have options, maybe more than you even think. With 20 plus sexuality and gender identities to choose from, you have the freedom to explore who you are and what you like in ways that you've never even imagine. Plus, there's no pressure to swipe if you happen to skip someone's profile. You can always go back or undo a dislike, all at no extra cost. If you're looking for friends, connections, all kinds of things and all kinds of forms, field is the place to do it. So download field, that's f e e l d, get it on the app store or google play. Go have some fun. Meet yourself and maybe something fun when we're trying to make progress. Life's curveballs often feel like taking one step forward and three backflips back. A Chime checking account makes financial progress easier with features like no maintenance fees or getting paid up to two days early with direct deposit and with fees and everything. And I mean everything. Concert tickets, airlines, movie, every video game. It's just like their fees and everything. And with Spot Me, Chime will spot you up to $200 when you exceed your balance. Sickening. Eligible members also get complimentary boosts to temporarily increase a friend's Spot Me limit. And when you give a boost, your friends can boost you back to temporarily raise your limit. Friendship make progress towards a better financial future with Chime. Open your account in two [e-mail] theread that's chime.com theread Chime feels like progress. Banking services and debit card provided by the Bancorp Bank NA or Stride Bank NA members FDIC Spy Me eligibility requirements Overdraft limits apply. Boosts are available to eligible Chime members enrolled in SpotMe and are subject to monthly limits. Timing depends on submission of payment file fees Apply at out of network ATMs. Tia Mori has a new show coming out. There's a preview of sorts that's come out. I think it's called My Next act. And it's essentially following her being newly single, still kind of dealing with this new divorce from her now ex Cory Hardrict, and, you know, balancing life as, I guess, being alone.

[B]

Alone. Yep.

[A]

And in a part of the clip, she mentions at one point that it's moments like dropping your kid off at her dad's house that make her want to call her sister and talk. She wishes that they were close, but that's just not where they are right now. That was all that was said in the court.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

From there again, the Internet sleuths were like, well, if you watched their series on what style USA, whatever the fuck back in 2000 and whatever the fuck, then it shouldn't be a surprise that they're not close anymore because Tia was an absolute demon and Tamara is a racist and Tia eats babies and Tamara has a swastika on her. But like, what the fuck?

[B]

Yeah, they're sisters, right? And siblings be going through it sometimes.

[A]

Hello.

[B]

I mean, yes, Tamara either is a Republican or is fine being married to one that Fox News nigga. She's married to conservative, right? With them white children. So yes, I would not be surprised if there was quite a bit of friction and like some divide between the sisters because of these. They have always been very different people.

[A]

Like they are a bit different.

[B]

Yes, I know. It was a sick. It was like a sitcom for children. But one of the main things about Sister Sister was that the girls looked exactly alike, yet had these very different personalities. And I think in real life, they also look very much alike, but have very different personalities. And as they get older, you have kids, I'm not sure if they live in the same city, but anything can cause distance between a relationship, can cause you not to be as close to people you used to be, but you add ideological differences on top of that, and now it's like, yeah, I just really don't. I talked to my sister at Christmas and on our birthday, and that's about it. Sad, but like, it's like that for a lot of people.

[A]

Yeah, I just. I don't know if it's the dumb empath in me or whatever, but just something about it bugs me a little. People trying to villainize one or the other over a comment that was so basic, that wasn't indicative of anything extreme. And ultimately, like, they sisters. You think they're not gonna be good Thicker?

[B]

Yeah. Or. Oh, okay. Yeah. You think they not gonna eventually figure it out? I mean, I'm likely their family, right? Very likely. Very, very likely. But.

[A]

But it's also like, you referencing the show where they used to bicker and fight and stuff like that. It's like, duh, girl, they're siblings. I bicker and fight with my siblings.

[B]

You don't wanna know the fights I used to have with my brothers. I already told y'all about the way I used to beef with a literal toddler.

[A]

Do you remember Run's house when Diggy and Russy used to be laying each other the fuck out on camera? Granted, they were, like, very young.

[B]

Damn right.

[A]

But still, damn, niggas.

[B]

Me and my brother used to threaten to stab each other all the time. Like, I will literally kill. I will take your life if you don't get out of my room.

[A]

Now you laugh about it at brunch and your mama goes, that's not funny. That shit is not funny.

[B]

Yeah, well, I'm over here hehe hawing. I don't know what to tell you girls. Hilarious to me. I hope they figure it out, though.

[A]

Tia said to Us Weekly. You could hear it from me, and this is basically what I was insinuating. I feel like as we grow up, we all start our own families and the children need to lean on them. We begin to take on new roles and responsibilities in our lives. That is what that was all about. I Love my sister very much. She loves me very much. We have a closeness and a beautiful connection. But that's what that was all about. It's just how life unfolds and it happens with many families.

[B]

Well, there you go. Damn. That's exactly what I just said.

[A]

Literally.

[B]

It only takes a drop of good sense. It just takes one drop.

[A]

When asked how Tamera felt about the comments, Tia told us it was not surprising. When you've been in this industry for over 30 years, things are always taken out of context. And it is what it is. The only thing I can do is control my behavior and be the best person I could possibly be. And that's what both of us are. We're incredible, inspiring examples. And we have been that all our lives. So long.

[B]

Period. Okay, listen.

[A]

So Tia basically saying, stand up in your shit. Shut up.

[B]

Act like. Please act like you know who the Mowry twins are. Like, don't, don't do this. Me and my sister are 40 something years old. We both have kids, responsibilities. Like, yes, we're not close like we were when we were seven. Fucking teen. Can everybody just.

[A]

Can everybody act like shooting a fucking TV show together?

[B]

Yeah, yeah, but you know, Tamag. Tamaga. I'm sorry, girl. That is not in the spirit of this conversation. This is supposed to be about unity. This is supposed to be about unity. God damn it.

[A]

Well, I'm done. Okay? I'm actually done. Not with the topics, but with the show. I'm done with the episode. Goodbye to Maga. Wow.

[B]

I didn't mean to say it. I didn't. But I'm sure the, the, the, the MAGA allegations don't help things around there. So. So, so it's not pride anymore. But let's go. Let's go back to the gays for our last letter.

[A]

Why not?

[B]

This one is from I'll call you Ocean Gate. Because there's a lot of popping going on. Says I'm a gay black man. And on Christmas of last year, I hosted a little session at my house with some other like minded grown men. Or at least that was my exception. It ended up being me and five other guys. Shout out to five guys. We had liquor, weed, edibles and poppers. All the shit you need for a merry fuck festival. Yeah, for the most part. All went well. Everybody was in a good mood and had a great time. It got kind of late, so three of the guys spent the night at my house. One of them slept in my bed with me. The other two slept in the guest room. The guy who Slept with me, got up earlier than everybody else, went downstairs, got dressed and left. The two guys in the guest room, woke up a little later and started to get dressed. Now, this is where the poppers became an issue. One of these. Okay, not. Not during the fest. That went great.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

One of the two guys in my guest's bedroom had brought some poppers with him and he couldn't locate them when he was getting dressed.

[A]

You are lying.

[B]

I don't. Okay, I don't really use poppers, so I figured it was no big deal and they could be replaced at any sex store. However, old buddy was really stressed about them damn poppers. Shortly after they left, this texted me, still talking about the poppers, and he assumed that they had been stolen. I went through the evening with him and told him that we had all ended up asleep upstairs. But I did mention that the guy who slept in the bed with me had been downstairs by himself getting dressed because this was the only time where someone was unaccounted for. I wasn't necessarily implying that he had stolen the poppers, but I was just pointing out that he was alone. So who knows? He might have just picked them up by accident. Everybody, bottled poppers look the same. I don't know. Anyway, the popperless nigga goes on to say that I need to be more careful about who I deal with because he doesn't want me to be around people who will take advantage of me. Girl, they're. And that pissed me off.

[A]

That's not gold bullion.

[B]

I'm so sick of sissy. I'm so sick of sissy. I'm so sick of sissy. I may be with some freak shit from time to time, but I'm very much about business and consider myself to be a pretty good judge of character. I told the accused pauper thief about these suspicions. He got angry and said that he doesn't have to steal poppers. Blah, blah, blah. I would have been offended too. I cannot lie. He was highly offended. But I pointed out to him that he was the only person who was alone during this whole ordeal. He was so pissed, though, that he went so far as to buy replacement poppers and then gave them to me to hand them out. Like I'm a damn popper delivery service. All this happens.

[A]

That is so funny. Like, he ate that. I'm not gonna lie.

[B]

He did. Bitch, steal your poppers. Take them cheap ass poppers.

[A]

Are you okay? I cannot.

[B]

Okay, all this happened six months ago.

[A]

All the speed at which I would block your ass.

[B]

The popperless guy has reached out to me four or five times since then, but I haven't replied to any of his texts. He really pissed me off by being so pissy about some damn poppers. I didn't like the insinuations he made regarding my judgment of people. My question is, am I needlessly holding a grudge? Should I let bygones be bygones and be open to communicating with my popper list freak friend again? I would love to receive your perspectives. Signed, oh, Poppy Gold. You gave yourself a name. I think Ocean Gates. Better. Sorry.

[A]

Yeah, I do, too. Wow. Pride is over and it shows.

[B]

So you can be as homophobic as you wanna be.

[A]

What is wrong with the girls? Like, are y'all. First of all, he didn't say if these other people were black.

[B]

I'm sure they all are.

[A]

Are you?

[B]

Well, I think if somebody wasn't black, he would have said, like, if it was the white boy accusing somebody of stealing, probably would have been a whole different tone. But you're right, he didn't specify.

[A]

I need some of y'all to calm down. Like, this is. First of all, we aren't talking about, like, Lord War Bonds.

[B]

No, we'll never be something important that matters. No, be serious. We're not doing that.

[A]

You're talking about shit that people use to clean leather boots and stuff. It's not. Like, first of all, I would have dragged them, but I wanna know why you even went as far as you did for, like, maybe you. Maybe. Cause he said that the. The insinuation that he needs to watch you here, like, maybe that really hit you some type of way, and so you felt obligated to do all this other stuff. But the second that this person started getting irate with me and Pissy and trying to play Blue's Clues, Nancy Drew, all that other shit over some poppers.

[B]

Yeah, yeah.

[A]

And I know, like, no shade. I've experienced poppers. I have no problem with the paupers. I get it. Fine. I also understand that some of you girlies are, like, importing poppers from the Middle east or some shit that just like, oh, it has less burn and just a hint of pumpkin spice. Like, girl, if you don't just go down to the pleasure chest or whatever the fuck and stop being strange, bitch. Like, that's the only way that I could understand why you would go the extra mile and get so fucking pissed off about these poppers is if it's like, if, first of all, poppers is your bag, which unpack that. And then it's like I would assume it has to be some kind of popper brand or whatever that is like not easy to just run down to the store and get.

[B]

Must have been even still designer poppers.

[A]

Just get some like, it can't be that big a deal. First of all, if I love something that much, for instance, gummy candies, if I wish that I've gotten into it to the way that I have gotten into gummy candies, buying specialty. Do you remember the time that she came over to the house for us to do the green experiment and I had them candies from Brazil.

[B]

Yes, yes. You had all kind of snacks from overseas.

[A]

Korean shoes.

[B]

That is you.

[A]

I know I can't just run down to Ralph's, to Publix, to Kroger. So do you know what I do? I get in my pocket, I say, how much do I want these gummies? A lot. I get in my pocket and I pay that $25 for a pack of 12. So if there happens to be a gummy thief one night when I'm having an orgy, I'm not gonna lose my fucking mind because I have more gummies. And also losing my mind over gummies is strange.

[B]

It is like, you know, especially if there was gummy rings. You don't know what we was doing with those. We was having all kind of fun. We was playing games, we was playing horseshoe.

[A]

I wouldn't have asked nobody a mother fucking thing behind that solvent bitch. I would have been like, ho. At best.

[B]

At best. This is what I'm saying. These are harsh. Like hazardous chemicals is the case.

[A]

Have to calm down.

[B]

Does Prada make poppers? What are these? $500?

[A]

No shade.

[B]

Are they propers?

[A]

Balenciaga would do it. No shade. Balenciaga would definitely. Especially right now.

[B]

It just. And honestly, losing a bottle of poppers kind of seems like the price of entry at an orgy to me. We having a big fuck party and I brought poppers. Go get some more. It's like bringing a bottle. I'm not getting that bottle back. I'm not taking that Casamigos home. You know, it just kind of seemed.

[A]

Like if it was like ketamine or like, oh boy, drugs or something that's like more expensive or harder to come by or something like that. Even then, as someone who I could never like, let's say I had some K and it went missing at a party that I was at or something. First of all, to your point, what's supposed to happen? First of all, to your point, I would Feel immediately like, well, price of entry.

[B]

Price of entry. You came here.

[A]

It happens.

[B]

You came here to fuck.

[A]

Do you know how many fucking weed pens I have lost?

[B]

Oh, please. And you'll never see those again.

[A]

Fucking life. I just chucked the deuces. Thankfully, now I'm in a place where I can go and just go get another one or something, which I usually don't have to do because do you know how many I have on land now? You live and you fucking learn.

[B]

Extras and batteries. I got all these hoes, but I could never.

[A]

I would never lose a wee pen or some K or Molly or whatever the fuck, anything, and be like, the moment that I'm, like, upset and confronting somebody about it, I'm first gonna ask myself questions.

[B]

Yes. Yeah. What's going on with me?

[A]

Hmm? Hmm?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Like oxtail. Sure. My mama's oxtail. Oh, I'll cut you. But, like, when it dips into drugs, I. Yeah.

[B]

I mean, especially alcohol. Like, come on, it's. If it's not toppers, if it's not money, ID cards, like, come on, it just. Even if you had just bought the paupers, I can see me being mildly irritated at best. Not going back and telling the host, you need to watch what kind of people you have in your life.

[A]

You clearly need to start having these orgies with a metal detector.

[B]

No, ma'am.

[A]

We need to be having background checks. Cause the girls steal nitrate. Come back.

[B]

You cannot be throwing this kind of fit behind homosexual whippets. Like, baby, these are toxic. You was not supposed to be doing this shit. No way.

[A]

I would have sent her a dot org, and I'm not playing. Yeah, I would have linked her to a nonprofit. Sweetie, this is not a good sign.

[B]

You might be needlessly holding a grudge, but I also don't think you should have to let it go. I wouldn't necessarily let bygones be bygones either. I might text them back and be like, you still tripping off them poppers? Did you find them hoes? Like, did you just go buy another bottle? Cause they're $20, $30 or what? I don't know how much poppers are, but, like, did you take that on the chair?

[A]

I haven't bought them in a while, so I can't remember, but they're not super pricey.

[B]

Did you know. Did you just take that L and move on or what? Because if you still acting like that. Acting like I need to. Like, I'm a poor judge of character because you couldn't find a bottle of poppers after a party. Then, no, I don't want you to still come over. Maybe he's over it. Maybe he was like, oh, actually, yeah, they were in the small pocket of my backpack, and I didn't see until three months later or something. Who knows?

[A]

Rush is 1650 on this website. Anyway, I'm sure.

[B]

Please don't buy your local sex store.

[A]

It's cheaper.

[B]

Don't do that.

[A]

Don't. Do not do that. I'm just trying to get an under like this one.

[B]

Cause for me.

[A]

Cause the last time I boss my.

[B]

Mom like this got to be, is this your rent? Are you serious? Is your rent missing? Is your gas money missing?

[A]

What are we talking about?

[B]

Yeah, sorry, it's just the cost of doing business at an orgy. Be glad all you lost was some poppers.

[A]

I love that. That one queen was like, here is a jar of poppers for you to have.

[B]

That's me.

[A]

That's me into the ground. Like me into the ground.

[B]

Oh, that is me. Did you steal my poppers? Not only did I not steal your poppers, for you to be like, well, you was the only one downstairs by yourself, bitch. I will buy a bottle of poppers for every last one of the hoes in this house right now. Like, please do not come at me like I am some broke boy who cannot come up with $20 for poppers. Like, don't do that. Don't do that.

[A]

In fact, I went to Dick's Dot Dicks TV, and I went ahead and got you the 50 pack.

[B]

We're going to wrap it up. We're going to wrap it up. That is. That is enough. Best of luck, Ocean Gate, moving forward, I guess. Be careful about the invite list for them orgies, child. I don't know, Pauper. Yeah, so if you have a question for us, send it on.

[A]

I went to a kiki one time, but, like, money went up missing.

[B]

Okay, see, now that's something else.

[A]

And that wasn't an orgy. That was just niggas, like, after a party, like, into the hours of the night, and it was just keeping the thing going and whatnot. And people that doing their whoopty whoops. And at one point, the nigga who place it was who hosted the thing, cut that music and was like.

[B]

Find my $500 and find it now.

[A]

They figured out who did it. Yikes.

[B]

Messy.

[A]

But that makes sense.

[B]

Popper just money, right, bitches? Eight people in here with the same bottle of popper. Anyway, letter is from Antoine, who says I'm a 32 year old black man living in Brooklyn with my 32 year old girlfriend. I've been living alone for the past four years. And last year my girlfriend was really pressing to move in. I was against it since I really like living in my own space. Okay. But as time went on, she began pressing even harder and I gave in. She's extremely flip floppy. She was. But she was already over here all the time. So I just thought, what the hell.

[A]

No.

[B]

My girlfriend was also living alone, right? But she was very overwhelmed with bills and on several occasions she expressed needing help. So we subleased her place to one of her co workers.

[A]

Oh God.

[B]

Fast forward a few months into us living together. It wasn't all bad, but she really began to abuse the situation and I felt like a sponsor. She would leave her clothes all over the place, took up the closet, a.

[A]

Sponsor, and left her dishes.

[B]

What'd you say? God's timing is always right. I don't hear you. I got myself a sponsor. Oh, you know, let me google it. I got oh Tiara, Tierra Dori. No, I don't remember that all. I didn't hear you. I'm sorry.

[A]

Oh my God, that song was so damn stupid.

[B]

I don't. It's not ringing a bell.

[A]

Hey, I got myself a sponsor. Hey.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

It was like.

[B]

Anyways, so back to Antoine, who says she was taking up the majority of the closet space and left dirty dishes in the sink, which caused roaches to be in my apartment, which I have never had before. Hell, listen. Everybody in New York City knows it's too easy for bugs to show up in these apartments. You cannot.

[A]

Get out. Get out.

[B]

She used the extra income from her sublease to party and bullshit all summer with her friends. And I'm all for a good time, but going out three times a week is a little excessive. Anyway, I brought up how I felt she was wasting too much money because we all know that going out in this city is not cheap and she would just catch an attitude and then storm off. While all of this is happening, I was still trying to be a good partner and see things from both sides of the table. About three weeks ago, my girlfriend said she wanted to break up because she isn't happy with our relationship. Whoops. This was a surprise to me since she was the one causing all the headaches, but honestly, I was indifferent. I did want us to try to figure things out with our relationship, but I also did want my space back. Since then I found out she's been talking to other guys and has been lying to me about several other things. I'll be honest for context. I have cheated in the past with other women, but only after she told me that she had an STD that I didn't give her. And I know this is ghetto. My question is, how much time is enough time to get somebody out of your house who has clearly expressed not wanting to be with you? I feel like now she's trying to reap the benefits of being with me without actually being with me. Any advice would be great. Please help. Thanks, Antoine.

[A]

Okay. He said how much time?

[B]

Yes.

[A]

Okay. In New York City, tenants must give their 30 days written notice. Okay. I'm just looking up what the law says, because that would be bare minimum for me. You're getting out of my house and you're getting.

[B]

I don't think the law actually has anything to do with this. I don't think because she is living with you in your house, she's probably not also on your lease.

[A]

That's what I'm saying. Like, I'm trying to go where, like, fairness from a legal perspective would go, if that's what this was. And then I'm hacking off interest. I'm hacking off pain and suffering. I'm packing off damages. You. Okay? You take that target bag that you brought in here, pack up all. Pack up your hot comb and all your roaches, and get the fuck out of my house. And you do it today, bitch.

[B]

Yeah. New York City has very different laws from most of the rest of the country, so you probably do have to take her to court if she's not willingly going to leave in order to get her out. Because, yeah, there's a lot of laws in favor of tenants here, which is not necessarily a bad thing. It just turns into a bad thing when you're in a situation like this, which is why you don't let people move in with you if you're not completely sure on both sides that this is what you want. But you've learned that lesson now. But as far as I'm concerned, if you are the one initiating the breakup, you need to be prepared to move out that same day.

[A]

Are you. What? Are you. What do you think this is, right?

[B]

This is not a fucking Motel 6, girl. We're not going to light on for you.

[A]

You're breaking up with me because you are upset with our relationship, which. The way I could dive into that. But let's not. You're breaking up with me in my house. But it's. I noticed there aren't any packed bags around here. So I don't.

[B]

Doesn't make sense. It doesn't. How are you leaving?

[A]

So if I live here and you don't and you only lived here because we were in a relationship and we're not now. Where are your things?

[B]

Yeah, Are they.

[A]

Oh, you already. Did you already remove them because there's a couple of roaches up over there in the kitchen that you forgot to pick up. You will remove with your hands. I don't care if you take each finger. You are going to pluck all of these roaches out of my goddamn house and get the fuck to step in.

[B]

You would have had to leave right then and there, my bro.

[A]

One.

[B]

You really can't do that in the city. You cannot just leave dirty shit out. The bugs will come. Get it? Roaches. When I never had roaches before and I know it's because of some shit you did that would have pushed me over the edge. You cannot stay in my home.

[A]

Fuck girls or pussy hoes exist as well. This is an example of that, madam.

[B]

You got a lot of nerves, sister. I would never break up with somebody and not have somewhere else to go. I don't even wanna still be in the house.

[A]

What do you mean?

[B]

Why would I even wanna share space with you?

[A]

How's this going? So I don't wanna be in a relationship with you.

[B]

I don't wanna.

[A]

I don't wanna see you.

[B]

No. She might just think of you as a lick. Because you said she was three weeks ago. Yeah. Cause how she break up with you three weeks ago? And you talking about how much time is enough time, nigga? Text her today and say this serves as your written notice that you have 30 days to vacate. Like if you don't and see.

[A]

And that is where again we are being kind out.

[B]

Right? Because what I really want to do is simply put her things outside and set the chain lock.

[A]

See the way that I would be doing the math if anything I'm saying. Bitch, we broke up three weeks ago. That means you have another week. You have seven days.

[B]

No, no. You have to give the rip to.

[A]

Get the fuck out of my house.

[B]

No, no, no. She gives them three weeks for free. She don't.

[A]

Brooklyn is very big now. You better hit the beat and figure something out, diva.

[B]

It's a lot of people in rooms, girl. Don't get me wrong.

[A]

And these roaches are getting out of my house.

[B]

If I broke up with you and we lived together, I would give you probably a couple of months to try to figure things out.

[A]

I Don't even do that.

[B]

Well, no, because if I initiate the breakup, then it might be coming out of nowhere for you. You need some time to get things together. I get that. So I would be willing to give, you know, a certain amount of time because I'm the one who's kind of putting things into turmoil. But this girl has perhaps correctly realized that she done found a nigga who will just let her do whatever she used the money from her except stay.

[A]

At her damn his damn house, I.

[B]

Guess, because, well, I mean, three weeks ago. I'm not sitting around for three weeks while somebody who broke up with me walks around in my shit using up my closet space. Yeah, no, you actually have to leave right now.

[A]

You have to get the fuck out, and it has to be now.

[B]

Antwerp again, double check the laws in New York City, but it sounds like she probably didn't save no money. Like, she probably burnt all her money on hookah anyway. So I don't know if she could really hire a lawyer to make this hard for you, but double check, send that text, and, yeah, get ready to pay to have your locks changed if necessary. But I kind of want you to stand up. And I don't even feel right saying that to a man because normally I'm not pro. Whatever it is y'all are doing, but you're being played here. You are roaches in my black American.

[A]

Home, and I didn't even break up with you then, and you have the nerve to come telling me that you unhappy?

[B]

Mm.

[A]

But basketball wise finna come on. So excuse me, like, bitch, if you don't get the fuck out of my house and shut your ass up, it.

[B]

Actually would have started with leaving clothes all over the place. I don't leave shit all over the place in my home. My apartment is very clean. I don't just leave things. So if you see that my home is clean, why would you then make it dirty knowing that you. You are a guest? Like, this is not your apartment when it comes down to it, this is not yours. This is mine. So why don't you treat it with more respect than you would yourself?

[A]

Is it nature? Is it nurture? What? Is it because for me, when I am in somebody else house, where's the coaster? Do I take the shoes off? May I like, yes.

[B]

And even if I. I get.

[A]

And if it's my nigga that's taking.

[B]

Care of me, child, I'm putting shit up. I'm putting it away. You just come in the house. What? Take your shit off, throw it on the couch or whatever and just leave it there for days. I don't live like that.

[A]

You share your dominoes with the roaches. Watch baddies. I hate this.

[B]

The closet space is just. Okay. I wouldn't have paid that too much mind, but dirtying up my house and.

[A]

Bringing vermin, that is.

[B]

I think, Antwan, you might need to ask yourself why you didn't break up with this girl. Or honestly, why you relented over her pressing you to let her move in. Or why you didn't say, well, if you move in, then, you know, we need to go half on this shit. You move in, then we both need to be saving money. I shouldn't still be paying the same amount of money. But also now having a roommate. I don't want to live with nobody. Do you get that?

[A]

Do you understand that? Where are we?

[B]

So I would be giving something up to let you in my home. You have a lot of questions you need to ask yourself. Here, babe. Gonna send that text. This serves as your 30 day notice to vacate my home. If you have any questions, contact an attorney and best of luck. That's how I would approach it, but wishing you the best, Antoine, because it kind of sounds like this woman has you by the balls and it's hard for you to stand up for yourself when she's around. So you might have to draw on some strength. Call some friends, ask them to hype you up first. You know, maybe somebody can come over and help you say things with your chest, but you can't. You say you felt like this woman was taking advantage and you felt like a sponsor as soon as she moved in. So, yeah, she's gonna let this go for as long as you let it happen. Good luck with the breakup.

[A]

She was feeling myself on Spotify.

[B]

I was gonna say playlist. She got a lot of city girls on her playlist, don't she? This sound like a city girl thing?

[A]

Yeah, it does.

[B]

Wait, but then throwing at the end for context, in fairness, I did used to cheat on her with multiple women. Like, wait, wait, wait. Now I feel like karma roaches.

[A]

Karma.

[B]

Not karma. Sand. You know what you deserve for that disease?

[A]

Water bugs. Daddy long legs. Silverfish.

[B]

Oh, good luck, Anton. Let us know how it goes, please. I'm very interested in seeing how this plays out.

[A]

Yes, me too. If you dunk Michelle, you badonk a dunk your way back into the competition. RuPaul Drag Race is back only on MTV with show stopping celebrity guest judges like Katy Perry, Dochi, Sam Smith, Adam Lambert, and more the splashiest season in herstory is making major waves. Raider Queen is back. I hold their face in my dainty.

[B]

Little hands because wetter is better. Ruhl's Drag Race is back.

[A]

New season tonight at 8, 7 Central on MTV. Welcome to Nadia Yada island, next on Nadia Yada Island.

[B]

I knew I deserved so much, much more, so I left. I finally switched to Metro and got what I was looking for.

[A]

Get one line for only $25 a month with autopay. Just bring your phone to Metro and experience all the data you want on the largest 5G network. That's nada. Yada yada. Only at Metro by T Mobile.

[B]

First month is $30. Bring your number and ID offer. Not available if with T Mobile or with Metro in the past 180 days. You know what I didn't understand? Did you see that? Russell Simmons piped in. Just decided to chime in about this whole situation from his safe house in Bali.

[A]

Are men okay? Because it feels like. Go ahead. How? Oh, I forgot to mention that Drake house got shot up, too.

[B]

Oh, yeah. But I don't think this was related to that.

[A]

There's no. Yeah, the cops are saying it doesn't seem to be related, but we'll see how that.

[B]

Well, I actually could not even get through the. I got through about 90 seconds. It's about a five minute long, five and a half minute long video of Russell Simmons. Of Russell Simmons sitting down in, you know, a yoga pose or something with that red ribbon tied around his wrist.

[A]

It has to be awful talking about.

[B]

How y'all are, you know, doing too much and going too far and you calling this man a pedophile and you saying this and all that, and it's like you are the absolute last nigga who should be piping up.

[A]

We understand you're triggered.

[B]

Okay. But, like, mind your Bali business. You stay right over there. You not in. And why aren't you in a. Why don't you come back over to America then and let's talk about it? If that's how you feel, why are you in Bali? Can you explain that? Hmm. Hmm.

[A]

It just feels like there's so many. There's been a lot of opportunities for n specifically to just be like, oh, I'm not gonna say anything, because that's the best course of action. And then they do the opposite.

[B]

Yep. They not like us. They not. And I take pride in that. I take pride in not being like you creepy ass weirdo niggas scheming on kids and very young adults. I'm Proud to not be that way I am. And just what a song this is. This was such a. This was a monumental moment in rap. One that I'm glad I was alive to witness and old enough to remember. We're gonna be telling the youth about this one day. Sit down.

[A]

It's gorgeous to have the perspective that we have from the time period we're from.

[B]

I wanted to talk about Bluey. If you haven't seen the last two episodes of Bluey, spoiler alert for the end of season three. But in this very big giant episode we're seeing, oh, my God, I'm about to cry. Rad and Frisky's wedding and this whole saga with the house being sold, Bluey is really upset, and Bingo don't really give a fuck. And that's one of the things I love about this episode is the whole time, Bingo's like, yeah, they buying our house, girl. And so what? I named my feet. But I listened to an Australian podcast. I'm in way too deep. There's a Bluey podcast, and I've been listening to em. One of them interviewed the creator of the show who said that, you know, we wanted to do something emotional, and he moved a couple of times as a kid, and it seemed like, you know, like, the most appropriate storyline for a children's show. You know, he didn't really want to talk about death or divorce. He wanted to do something maybe a little bit more relatable and less traumatic. The ending of this episode where, again, spoiler alert. The healer family does not actually move. A lot of things just kind of fall apart at the end, and they decide to stay home or in their home. But the ending of this episode was foreshadowed when the children are in the. In kindergarten or whatever with Calypso, and they're reading this story about the farmer and his horse. And Bluey says, you know, why do stories always have happy endings? And Calypso says, I guess because real life gives us enough sad ones. And I thought, oh, how true that is. But also, like, we see a lot of different storylines wrapping up. Chilli's sister, who has been struggling with infertility, is pregnant. And there's lots of, like, little things. We see Greeny again, which made me so happy. Cause when I was a kid, I had, like, a favorite balloon, which sounds really whack, but I did. And one day it flew away. You know, it got lost. It wandered off. And I really loved that balloon. And I was so sad. And I just. I miss you, Spotty. But Cause they had dots rip. She's gone. And Lilo. And Bingo's butterfly helps lead them to where Frisky is at the living room. And it's just a great episode. The muffins coin getting stuck, and then the sheepdogs finding it. And then they seeing the house with the pool, which is what they really wanted. And that house being Winston's dad's house, because Winston's dad is moving in with the terrier's mom. Like, it's just too much. So, anyway, I loved that. The episode just really illustrates how much everything is connected. And, like, the story goes like, you think something is good, you think something is bad. The lesson here is really that, yes, life is both of those things. It's good and bad in the same day, sometimes at the same time. Like, Bluey's having the worst day of her life because Frisky has called off the wedding. And two minutes later, she's having the best day of her life. Cause she gets to ride in the front seat for the first time. So it's things like that that I just really, really loved. Also, I was so glad that Bucky didn't get no commission off of Bandit, because I still don't appreciate the fact that he made fun of Bandit's drawing ability when they were kids. Like, I just felt like, you don't deserve no money off of him. Bandit is, you know, a better person than I am. And, yeah, a lot of. I saw a lot of pushback, obviously, from adults who are like, oh, my God, this isn't realistic. Like, me and my family are about to move, and now our kid is gonna think that something magically will happen at the very last minute, and we won't. And, you know, I've also struggled with infertility. And, you know, that's not gonna just magically change. I'm not gonna get pregnant like Brandi did. And it's like, yes. And I want to be empathetic about that, that y'all are going through hard times. Your kids are gonna have to go through something that they don't like. But that is the point. The point. That is the point of the episode. Like, yes, we're giving you a happy ending because it's a story. But also, we're showing you how the things that you think you don't want to happen are sometimes actually good for you. And sometimes the things you want don't serve you. So I just really, really loved the episode. Thought it was so well done. And then they put out another one on Sunday called Surprise. Oh, God. Which is all about, like, the girls. Bingo is playing house. Like, she's pretending to be a mother. Bluey is asking about what it's like to have kids. And it's like, girl, y'all are hell, but y'all are everything. It's like, it's both of those. And we get to see, like, there's a flash into the future. We get to see Bluey's kid, and there's been a lot of debate about who the daddy is. Maybe it's Jean Luc, maybe it's MacKenzie. I kind of feel like it's MacKenzie, but I do see the case for both. But it also just could be somebody else. So, you know, I don't know. We'll see. But really, I just wanted to say really quickly, I really adore Bluey. Like, it is just such an excellent show. And I love the way they weave all the different threads together and all the callbacks. It's just. More adults should be watching it. Go stream it right now. Disney, excellent, excellent programming.

[A]

Amen. But yes, I really didn't know what you talking about.

[B]

No, I just. It's like you. When you start talking about Avatar the Starbender. Oh, yeah. No. Water and earth with a little fire and some air. And that's how you get an airbender. And he has those powers. Yes, and that's what I meant. And this one is the airbender Avatar, but there are others, so. Yep, I get it. I get it. Just like you get Bluey.

[A]

I do. I told you. I bought Cam of Bluey. What is it called? Five Minute Stories. It's a gorgeous book, too. And it's, like, hardcover, but it's like. It's one of those children's book. Puffy. Hardcover. I don't know how to describe it.

[B]

Oh, yeah, no, I know what you talk about. Like, soft books.

[A]

Yeah, they're hardcover, but it's, like, soft and, like, puffy, I guess. So, like, Night Night Kid smacks itself in the face with it. Bluey. Five minute stories. Six stories in one book. Hooray. And it's cute. And I literally read half of it already, and I'm obsessed.

[B]

Yeah, it's great. It's a great show.

[A]

Yeah, Bluey's literally fantastic. I'm just not caught up.

[B]

If one of you has a Bluey podcast, please invite me on to talk about it. Like, I'm begging.

[A]

Someone's gonna make a Bluey podcast now.

[B]

No, that doesn't count. You have to already have Bluey content.

[A]

Search and find book work Blue. Let me order. I'm ordering two of these, bitch. I want one. Where's Bluey? A search. I was probably gonna be pretty easy. Whatever, it's fine.

[B]

Are you looking for like Where's Waldo level of difficulty? I think it will be no, but no, I think it probably will be kind of challenging. These kids know what Bluey look like.

[A]

It says two to five years. This is not going to be that.

[B]

Oh no it won't.

[A]

Sorry, but it's fine. I'm getting it anyway. One for you, one for K. It's.

[B]

Just like the Bluey video game I be playing that like this is really for kids.

[A]

Oh well that's super cute because it looks like you're watching.

[B]

Yeah. Oh God. I just love.

[A]

This is why I like it.

[B]

I just love this show. I could go on and on.

[A]

It's really, really great.

[B]

But that's enough about nice things. So for Halloween they have this adorable 8 or 9 year old little girl. For Halloween they let her dress up or directed her to dress up as Lil Kim.

[A]

Yeah, they did.

[B]

Now Lil Kim is already, already controversial, but exactly. She does have some child appropriate costumes. However, what Mr. In Mr. And Mrs. Envy did was not to put this child in anything even remotely age appropriate. They put her in a red one piece that has cuts out two cutouts.

[A]

Across the midriff, a sexy bathing suit.

[B]

I mean it's quite literally the little Kim outfit but for a little girl, red coat, red wig and it's like.

[A]

They could have even put like a pink bodysuit under some. Like they could have even made the crush on. Whatever. I'm tired.

[B]

So. Right. So they dressed this child up to look like Lil Kim in the crush on you video. They then filmed this child recreating the crush on you video and had her mouthing along two words during Kim's verse. And if you no crush on you, which most of us do. Kim's verse is not even remotely appropriate for children. This 8 year old girl mouthing I'll be undressed in the bra all see.

[A]

Through.

[B]

I'll be doing things that you won't regret the only one thing I want to do is freak you Having her close her mouth or like put her lips over her mouth instead of saying freak you doesn't change the impact here. Whisper in your ear get you all shook up. What business does a child have emulating this? And Crush on youn came out in what? 96, 97. So this child had no way of knowing about the song or video without being exposed to it to her parents.

[A]

Which is a separate thing for me, if I may.

[B]

Please.

[A]

You know how I love one of Victoria Monet's, her costume that she wore with Hazel.

[B]

Oh, the Supergirl thing? Yeah.

[A]

This is so clearly a show that Hazel must watch and is obsessed and was like, that's what I want to be. And her mama was like, bet.

[B]

Cause no adult would pick that.

[A]

You know, it's like y'all dressing your kids up as like Dae Dae or like ize or some other shit that they have like no context for. I'm just like, you didn't ask them what they wanted to wear because you.

[B]

Could have just did something them kids wanted to do.

[A]

Yeah, right.

[B]

And I'm actually went and got them.

[A]

A $25 bluey costume.

[B]

They want to be Bluey. Did you see the TikTok of the little boy who ran into somebody dressed up as Bluey and had a fucking meltdown?

[A]

No, but I'm not surprised.

[B]

I said, how relatable. I also would have lost my shit if I was out trick or treating and ran into fucking Bluey. But yes.

[A]

Why the fuck is your four year old dresses Fred Sanford?

[B]

Why is.

[A]

Of course we're gonna think they're. It's cute they're four in a costume, right? But like, let the baby pick with. I don't know.

[B]

I mean, I'm not. That's the thing. I'm not opposed to parents picking like something they like and having their kids dress up as that and like take pictures or whatever. But I would hope for whatever their main Halloween celebration is. Trick or treat or a party or Hallelujah night. If you was like me and had to go to church on Halloween. I never got to trick or treat a day in my life. I've never done it ever. Because my mama said, we're going to church. That's it. And that's all. And so, I mean, no, because the church knew what we really wanted and had plenty of the good candy, and that was all that counted. So we went to church and got candy instead of going around in different houses. But anyway, the point being giving it.

[A]

Out is way more fun than receiving.

[B]

I would hope that y'all would let your children dress up as something that they wanted to be for whatever the main Halloween. I'm not against.

[A]

And maybe you do.

[B]

And maybe you do. Maybe this is not what she went on, you know, maybe this is not what she went trick or treating as. I would fucking hope you wasn't walking this baby around the suburbs of New Jersey dressed Like Kim, an eight year old girl.

[A]

I don't get it.

[B]

I'll be undressed in the bra, all see through. Are you out of your mind? Do you want perverts?

[A]

Lil Kim has so many looks that are not only like iconic in a way that you, you could put them on a kid, immediate immediately recognize it. But also like, oh, this isn't inappropriate for a kid to wear. Furthermore, you both have money, so it's not even like there's just no excuse here. You could take something like even the. I wouldn't do this because even like I think the reference is still inappropriate. But think of like the VMA pasty look. There's a way to do like a purple mermaid look with the wig that a kid wears. Don't include the pasty obviously, but you could make a kid version of that if you wanted to do it. If you wanted to because you have the money. But like when I heard about this and I looked at what that girl was wearing, I was like, why did you. And then you had her rapping the music and you put this on the Internet for people to see, literally. And then pushed back on the backlash.

[B]

It was those four things for me. You came up with the idea and put her in that get up. You had her mouthing extremely explicit lyrics. You recorded it and put it online. Which you know, if you were just huge Kim fans, they wanted to FaceTime Kim and be like, look at our baby. That would be one thing. Weird, but still one thing. You then recorded the phone call with Kim and her recreating this video and posted it and posted it to the world. Freak off Internet. What? Full of hoes and degenerates and disgusting sick twisted people and then double down on it. It's still up if you want to go. As if you, if some pervert wants to go watch an 8 or 9 year old girl talking about freaking him, then he can do that. I just can't believe you put your daughter in that situation. Either one of you, mother or father. I can't believe either one of you put your child in that place. It's not just the lyrics.

[A]

I'm wearing like a pink Power Rangers outfit with a pink coat and a pink wig and then it's Lil Kim, you know what I'm saying? Because Kimberly was the Pink Ranger. So you could have given her like a pink outfit. A pink Ranger outfit and then a pink Lil Kim wig and then a pink little like fake faux coat. Not just like a faux fur coat. Yeah, there you have it.

[B]

Not this, not This I could not believe. Them niggas put their child out there and I just put it up. Thousands of bookmarks on this post right now. Thousands.

[A]

I know you can see that.

[B]

Yeah, well, Elon doesn't change it to where you can see how many people have bookmarked something.

[A]

And oh, these are on Twitter.

[B]

Oh, yeah. I don't even know about Instagram. I would hate to see on Instagram. I don't even want to know. But y'all. I just cannot believe y'all had such little regard for that child's safety. She didn't pick that out. No 8 or 9 year old child chooses to be Lil Kim and Malalong to the crush on you video without adult influence.

[A]

Because it's like there's the bathing suit itself, right? And let's say we know we're at the pool having like a little family cookout. We're going to the beach, and for whatever reason, this is the bathing suit that you decided this 8 year old or whatever should be wearing. I personally have like an aversion to those types of bathing suits for children. But I also feel like, you know, if you are protecting your kid, looking after your kid, they're comfortable, you're comfortable, whatever. It doesn't automatically seem like indicative of bad parenting or unsafety. But that's like, okay, again, you're at the pool or something like that and you're keeping it to yourself, not even.

[B]

Talking about a swimsuit. Children swim. Children swim.

[A]

Yeah, that's what I'm talking about.

[B]

If the baby was going swimming, I wouldn't have nothing to say.

[A]

If the baby was going swimming and this was just y'all chilling at the house swimming, sure. Then it could be a different thing. But you taking a reference of an adult sexy woman and then like rapping.

[B]

About sex, rapping about fucking. These lyrics are about like, that's an additive child.

[A]

Yeah. It's just. I don't get it.

[B]

Do y'all care about this little girl? Do you? I would never put a child in that position. I would never, ever, ever in my natural black ass life do all of the things y'all did in this scenario. Dress up.

[A]

Your other daughter was Aaliyah. What does she have on?

[B]

Well, so she had, you know, just a regular Aaliyah. I think she had on like a white tank top and some jeans or something. It was like she was covered and it was still obviously, you know, the parents idea. But to have the baby, I guess. I don't know if this child is the youngest one. I don't know how many kids these people have, but to have this little girl dressed like that and mouthing along to these lyrics. Yeah, go ahead and tell the fed.

[A]

Settling. I think is.

[B]

Is tell the feds to come right over here. Yeah. Because I'm. I'm disgusted and disturbed and I want to know what else is on y'all hard drive at this point. I'm curious, bitch. Because what the are y'all doing over there?

[A]

I genuinely don't see how anybody was like, yeah, let's do this.

[B]

Everybody in the credits need to be under federal investigation asap. The videographer. If I was the videographer and I was told I'm recording some kids Halloween video and then I get there and it's this shit. I'm going home, T. Bitches is child pornography. This is not going to be on my goddamn resume. Are you kidding, T? Who made this outfit?

[A]

I'd be like, okay, is this like some sort of. No, this is going hidden camera show.

[B]

Like, right, Like.

[A]

But no, because this one of those.

[B]

What would you do shows.

[A]

Yeah, like, is this. What would you do do, like, am I like, yeah, this is.

[B]

Those.

[A]

Be serious.

[B]

Are you gonna do the right thing in the face of something incredibly up type. I would have thought I was on a reality show. Like, you know, you gotta get up earlier than that to trick me.

[A]

Right? Okay.

[B]

No. You showed up and said let's get ready with the child's mother and father in the same goddamn video. Is there a reason Gia's big grown ass couldn't have been Lil Kim?

[A]

It's probably us.

[B]

And did Envy not think, huh? Me doing the biggie part while my daughter does the Kim part is a little weird and a little gross. Maybe I shouldn't.

[A]

I had a sexual relationship. Yuck.

[B]

Yuck.

[A]

That we all know about. Yeah.

[B]

Am I the only one who cares about these kids?

[A]

No. Lots of people were upset.

[B]

God damn.

[A]

And I love a Kim outfit on a grown up.

[B]

On a grown up.

[A]

And I feel like I've probably seen little Kim outfits on kids before that were cute because they weren't like sexual.

[B]

Because they weren't right. I'm not the type of person to automatically sexualize kids. Kids running around in just they draws. I don't care because that means nothing to me. Little baby bodies before puberty, they're all the same. So I don't care about little girls or little boys running around with no shirt on wearing swimsuits at the beach. Especially two pieces. Because if you've ever taken a baby to the beach, you will learn very quickly. It is much easier to have that nigga in a two piece. So you could just pull the shorts or the bottoms off, have them pee, and then pull them right back up as opposed to some big, wet, sticky one piece like that.

[A]

No, everybody I know it makes sense.

[B]

Because why would you. You, you, you weren't raised having to take care of children. I was. So this is something I know because I've always had to be a caregiver. But two pieces are much easier at the beach, especially when you're trying to teach kids not to pee in the ocean, not to pee in the pool. You know, we need to make this as easy as possible. So I'm not one of them people to be like, kids shouldn't wear swimsuits. Kids shouldn't wear two pieces bikinis, whatever else. I don't have no problem with that. I don't sexualize children because I don't look at them like that. You sexualized your child. Envy and Mrs. Envy. Y'all dress that baby up like Lil Kim in a sexual way.

[A]

That's what I'm saying.

[B]

Y'all had that child mouthing about and scamming.

[A]

See that swimsuit on that kid at the beach or something like that would have just been like, oh, kid at the beach.

[B]

Right? That swimsuit. I would have been like, okay, it's a little much, but I'm not tripping. I'm not tripping.

[A]

Right the same way, like with, like, little girls in dance classes.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Like, some of the outfits in, like, Young Ballet, even, I'm like, that's a bit much. And that's what I'm not.

[B]

And that's what dance teachers say. Like, parents, before you leave, put your kids street clothes back on. Please do not take your children out in their dance classes because, you know, they're safe here. But we don't know what people on the street are thinking, and she's in a leotard or whatever else, and we just want to protect the kids. Like, that's why more dance teachers have started saying shit like that, because niggas are sick. People are creepy and weird about your babies. How are you not? How is their protection and their safety not the first fucking thing on your mind?

[A]

That's why I have seen, like, sometimes like, oh, you know, me and the kids went to a water park thinking, one of the kids has on, you know, simple two piece. Not even this. You know something.

[B]

Yeah, right.

[A]

And you'll. We might still get comments about, oh, two piece. Oh, why can I do Whatever. And I'm just like, girl, why are you sexual? The kid is just at the beach and I didn't even. And I'm not even considering the ease of having two piece. Like, you know, like what you just said. Yeah, but yeah, you put this person in a video to be sexy and then lip sync explicit sexual lyrics.

[B]

Explicit lyrics. You didn't just dress your baby like her. You had her mouthing along to the lyrics and recorded it as a video and published it to the Internet and defended it and kept it online.

[A]

Okay.

[B]

Am I supposed to care more about y'all kids than y'all do? I pray a spirit of protection over that child. I pray God's protection over all those children in that house. Because God damn, your parents are clearly a fucking wreck.

[A]

That was a very bad idea.

[B]

Extreme on so many levels.

[A]

It just was.

[B]

And I just want to say I'm not one of those people. Like, literally before puberty, y'all be mad at like 6 year old girls running around without a shirt on. 6 year old girls and 6 year old boys look exactly the same. If you're okay with a little boy being without a shirt, you should be okay with a little girl being without a shirt. They do not have breasts at that age. They are all the same. I'm really not that girl. They're hot as the whole fucking planet is because we're all fucking boiling. And do you think Trump is gonna do something about that bitch? Why is it 77 degrees in New York City on November 6th? We're cooking. My friend was earlier I was, you know, I was in the group chat with all my niggas and my friend was like, girl, I can't move up north, it's too cold. I said, Bitch, it's 77 today. It's not too cold. Come on.

[A]

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