Feeling Myself

Summary

Podcast Summary: The Read – Episode "Feeling Myself"

Release Date: April 17, 2025
Host/Authors: Kid Fury and Crissle
Network: Loud Speakers Network

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1. Episode Introduction and Personal Updates

Kid Fury and Crissle kick off the episode with their signature humor and candid conversation about adjusting to life in New York City. Kid Fury shares his feelings about the current state of the world, likening his perception of the news to "the way that Link eats food when she's feeling sick" (00:54).

Notable Quote:

Kid Fury: "I look at the news the way that Link eats food when she's feeling sick. Sometimes just get a little tiny piece and then maybe spit it on the ground and eat it back later." (00:54)

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2. Celebrating Black Excellence

The hosts highlight recent achievements within the Black community, celebrating Dr. Jermaine Worl's historic appointment as the youngest president of an HBCU and Virginia Union University's new doula certification program aimed at reducing racial disparities in maternal and infant health.

Notable Quotes:

Kid Fury: "Shout out to Dr. Jermaine Worl, who's made history as the youngest president in HBCU history." (14:05)
Crissle: "Shout out to Virginia Union. This is an important program. Very needed doulas, midwives." (15:33)

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3. LeBron James Ken Doll Release

Kid Fury and Crissle discuss the release of the LeBron James Ken doll, reflecting on its accurate portrayal and the cultural significance of such merchandise.

Notable Quotes:

Kid Fury: "It looks just like him. Down to the little grays in his beard and everything." (16:05)
Crissle: "I just want to recreate his meme. He walks off with the bag." (16:28)

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4. Movie Discussions: Ryan Coogler and "The Woman in the Yard"

The conversation shifts to recent film releases, including Ryan Coogler's latest project and the horror movie "The Woman in the Yard." Both hosts express their anticipation and reservations about these films, touching on themes of race and supernatural elements.

Notable Quotes:

Crissle: "I'm trying so hard not to do my Bay Area accent right now... I cannot be left out." (06:04)
Kid Fury: "But it will frighten you." (11:49)

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5. Listener Letters

a. Letter from Rose: Navigating Sexual Boundaries in Marriage

Rose shares her struggle with her partner's discomfort regarding her masturbation habits, despite having a fulfilling sex life. Kid Fury and Crissle offer advice on communication and personal boundaries.

Notable Quotes:

Crissle: "It's my body. I'll do what I want and I don't think I should feel guilty." (57:33)
Kid Fury: "If you were to get to the place where you realized this is actually something that's legitimately bothering you... you have to recognize that the way you're treating your partner is absurd." (61:19)

b. Letter from Ben: Managing Anxious Attachment in a Relationship

Ben discusses his anxiety over his boyfriend's Instagram interactions, despite his boyfriend's reassurances. The hosts emphasize the importance of therapy and self-care in addressing deep-seated trust issues.

Notable Quotes:

Crissle: "He hasn't given me a single reason to not trust him." (70:04)
Kid Fury: "You have to let go of the anxiety. Niggas ain't going nowhere." (73:20)

c. Letter from Sarah: Ethical Dilemma in Podcast Networking

Sarah recounts her encounters with podcast hosts John and Luke, leading to romantic involvements. She grapples with whether to disclose her past hookup with Luke to John as their relationship with John progresses.

Notable Quotes:

Crissle: "If you want to pursue a relationship with John, you're going to have to say something." (87:44)
Kid Fury: "I agree. You need to tell him so he can make a decision." (85:52)

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6. Addressing the Soulja Boy Lawsuit

A significant portion of the episode is dedicated to addressing the lawsuit against Soulja Boy, who was found liable for sexual assault and emotional abuse, resulting in $4 million in damages.

Notable Quotes:

Kid Fury: "I just hate when I have to speak to you, Soulja Boy... If you think I touched that, y'all crazy. The judge thinks you owe that lady $4 million." (91:36)
Crissle: "It's really horrific. You need to pay that woman." (100:09)

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7. Political Commentary: Donald Trump and China

The hosts delve into geopolitical tensions, particularly focusing on a Chinese official's remarks contrasting the long history of China with the relatively recent establishment of the United States. They criticize the support for Donald Trump and the consequences of his policies.

Notable Quotes:

Kid Fury: "China's been around for 5,000 years. The US has been around for like 250. We've managed to thrive before you bitches." (104:18)
Crissle: "You're wasting your time with this orange stupid bitch." (105:15)

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8. Discussion on Keri Hilson and "Turning Me On" Controversy

Crissle and Kid Fury analyze Keri Hilson's revelations about her forced involvement in Beyoncé's diss track "Goodies." They express their frustration with Hilson's public apologies and the implications for female artists.

Notable Quotes:

Crissle: "Why did you put yourself in it? It's disappointing." (110:35)
Kid Fury: "You're the first rapper to do this. They did the same with Jay Z." (112:08)

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9. Conclusion and Giveaways

Wrapping up the episode, Kid Fury and Crissle announce a ticket giveaway for upcoming performances and express their gratitude to listeners. They encourage audience engagement through social media and provide information on how to participate.

Notable Quotes:

Kid Fury: "Follow us on Instagram at this is the read to be eligible to win." (121:18)
Crissle: "Have a beautiful day, baby girl." (120:31)

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Key Takeaways:

• Personal Growth: Both hosts emphasize the importance of self-care, therapy, and personal boundaries in relationships.
• Social Commentary: The episode addresses significant societal issues, including racial disparities, political tensions, and accountability in the entertainment industry.
• Listener Engagement: Through letters, the hosts provide relatable advice while maintaining their humorous and candid style.
• Cultural Reflection: Discussions on movies, merchandise, and celebrity controversies reflect the intersection of pop culture and societal values.

Final Thoughts: "Feeling Myself" showcases Kid Fury and Crissle's ability to blend humor with deep, meaningful conversations. They tackle complex issues with a balance of levity and seriousness, making the episode both entertaining and insightful for listeners.

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Note: Timestamps correspond to the transcript segments and are provided for reference.

Transcript

[Kid Fury]

The last thing you want to hear when you need your auto insurance most is a robot with countless irrelevant menu options. Which is why with USAA auto insurance, you'll get great service that is easy and reliable, all at the touch of a button. Get a quote today, restrictions apply. It was a run by fruiting. Hello everyone. I am Mrs. Douar.

[Crystal]

And I am Jillian Bradley. Happy birthday, girl. And this is the read. Thanks for coming back.

[Kid Fury]

Yes, it is. And thank you for returning this April we're wrapping mid month here, waiting for Beyonce and Kendrick and Sza to get started. But until then, correct. We are yet alive and just doing the best we can. I just, I, I look at the news the way that Link eats food when she's feeling sick. Sometimes just get a little tiny piece and then maybe spit it on the ground and eat it back later.

[Crystal]

I'll have to come back to that when I'm feeling better because right now I can't. I can't. I don't and I won't.

[Kid Fury]

I, I, Yeah. Anyway, on the positive, where's the major face smile this past week? I'll start.

[Crystal]

Oh, okay.

[Kid Fury]

I was walking.

[Crystal]

I'm gonna have to think about this.

[Kid Fury]

I was walking about the Los Angeles and I gotta say, the black girl beat the black femme face. The girlies are outside and they look good.

[Crystal]

Love that.

[Kid Fury]

It is so unfortunate, I suppose, that I'm homosexual and so I can't really do anything with most most of that. But I complimented at least three black women when I was walking back and forth from the dispensary a few days ago.

[Crystal]

Amen.

[Kid Fury]

Because from the beat to the no beat, the girls were outside and I was just blown over by how beautiful they all were.

[Crystal]

I love that. Amen.

[Kid Fury]

And thankfully they were receptive to my compliments.

[Crystal]

Well, I mean, a nice, you look good or you're so pretty or whatever. Like most people are like, thank you.

[Kid Fury]

I really do want to speak to them.

[Crystal]

Well, especially the straight ones because it's gonna get weird very quickly. But that's why you try to put.

[Kid Fury]

A little in it sometimes. So they just know. Yeah, it's like girl talk.

[Crystal]

You, I think you just spoke and they were like, yeah, I'm safe and this is, yeah, this is a good place for me to be. So thank you so much. I appreciate it. I actually, it actually was not that hard for me to think of one. I went to Jade's very first solo dinner events. Oh my God, Sunday on a Monday. So, so cute. So very well done. So proud of my sister. But the moment in particular. Well, yes, because she's been doing stuff with other people and help, you know, suing for other chefs and all this. Obviously went to culinary school and all that. She works a lot, so many jobs, but this was long overdue. I'm very proud. But the. What really made my heart just sing. Noah ran inside, and she was like, auntie. And gave me the biggest hug, and I was like, okay. Yes. Hi, baby girl. Hi, my little superstar. And then she wanted me to, like, she FaceTimed me so I could see her friend. I thought her friend was like on Twitch. And she was like, no, we're just young. This is how we look and act. And I was like, oh, okay. But anyway, it was very adorable, very sweet. Precious. And I'm so proud of Jade. Shout out to Chef Jade. Of all Jades. The first of many, many, many dinner events. And so many of you who were there recognized me, and somebody bought me a drink. The girl sitting next to me bought me a drink. So thank you. Thank you for that. It was a. It was a lovely time. Community, as Jade said, community being the whole point. So. Yeah, yeah, that was a bright spot. It was a bright spot because these headlines, child trash and garbage.

[Kid Fury]

I just. I don't. You know, we're gonna focus on the cinnamon girl. Congrats. Congrats. This better be many more to come. Many.

[Crystal]

And it was so good. Oh, my God. So good. She was selling that gumbo. I'm like, no, you to pack me up some gumbo, girl.

[Kid Fury]

Anyway, how does one pack up some gumbo? Just like a little Tupper.

[Crystal]

You put just a little Tupper, Tupperware, a bowl, whatever, full of gumbo.

[Kid Fury]

And then anything that holds.

[Crystal]

Anything that holds a soup like substance, you put it in a thermos, if you got to know.

[Kid Fury]

Literally, I'm sure people. Yes.

[Crystal]

And then a box of rice on the side. But really, you can just give me that gumbo, girl. I got rice at the house. Just give me that gumbo.

[Kid Fury]

That's true, girl. That's true. I can make rice, baby, real easy.

[Crystal]

Gumbo not gonna be done in 30 minutes.

[Kid Fury]

Oh, no. Maybe I can do that, right?

[Crystal]

Anyway.

[Kid Fury]

Okay, well, let's get into some more excellent black folk. I have a couple of people I would like to. First we will start. Okay. We'll start with one celebrity. Ryan Coogler has a new film coming out, I think this weekend.

[Crystal]

I'm going to see it tomorrow. Even though it do not look like it's for me.

[Kid Fury]

You're going to see A scary movie.

[Crystal]

Because it has 100% on rotten tomatoes. No, but I'm going to miss a.

[Kid Fury]

Zero wants to kiss you. You're going to see a scary movie alone?

[Crystal]

Yes, but at 1pm so I'll be fine. It'll be daylight the whole time. But no, I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Too many.

[Kid Fury]

Are you interviewing someone from the guy?

[Crystal]

No. The problem you just want to go see it has 100% on rotten tomatoes is Ryan Coogler. I'm trying so hard not to do my Bay Area accent right now. Like, y'all know I want to. I'm trying. I'm stifling it. And all the influencers, everybody who has already seen it is like, girl, it's a perfect movie. It's so good. I can't wait to see it again. 10 out of 10. Like, I have heard nothing but incredible reviews. So I'm like, I cannot be left out. Unfortunately, the FOMO is getting to me. My ticket is purchased and I'm going, God bless whoever's sitting next to me.

[Kid Fury]

But everybody knew I was going, right?

[Crystal]

That's totally different for you. I saw half of the trailer and was like, oh, I might be in it. Oh, no, what have I done?

[Kid Fury]

I am so excited. From the moment that I saw the trailer, the very first trailer, I think I tweeted it because I was like, hey, everyone, this is a movie trailer. This is exactly what a film trailer is meant to be. It didn't give you anything. I needed to go. Not just because it looks good. I needed to go and see more. I want to know. I have questions. I'm stimulated. I'm intrigued. It has not given me the whole fucking movie. It hasn't placed most exciting bits. It just give me just a little tiny bit. Like eating her food when she's not feeling good. Little tiny bit. And that's it. But then, yeah, this 100% rating on rotten Tomatoes and everybody saying it's fucking awesome and horror and Ryan Coogler directed it. I'm going. And my Michael B. Michael B. Jordan is playing twins. Yeah, Everybody. Country. I'm going to see this day.

[Crystal]

Yeah.

[Kid Fury]

Day zero.

[Crystal]

Black people. 1930s American South. I am there. I am there, baby. You didn't even have to twist my arm too much. But I. I know I will be afraid. I know I will. I'm just gonna have to get through it. I'm just gonna have to get through.

[Kid Fury]

I think it has something to do with music and possibly like, black music, black voices, specifically, having some ability to do Something with a spiritual realm or something. I think it had like. It's something to do with music being able to awaken supernatural forces.

[Crystal]

Supernatural forces that help y'all come beat these white people ass. Cause I have to assume white people are the enemy here.

[Kid Fury]

How many people are.

[Crystal]

I mean, it's the 1930s in America. How is Jim Crow not the villain?

[Kid Fury]

But maybe I think the villain. I think the villains are gonna be drawn to that power somehow. And maybe the power will help them defeat them. But see, again, I don't know. I watched the trailer. I don't know.

[Crystal]

Did you see the Woman in the Yard?

[Kid Fury]

Yes, Yes, I did. And I loved it so much.

[Crystal]

Of course you did. Of course you did. Oh my God. So I haven't. I knew for a fact that the girl in the yard was not gonna.

[Kid Fury]

Be for me, the girl bait, the dolly, the girly in the Yard.

[Crystal]

I knew. But I read the description of it. I said, this sounds like something you would like. And then I thought that. And then Ryan. Ryan Sides emailed me because he did a review of the movie. And he was like, I know you do mental health stuff. Can you look at this? Let me know, is this fucked up or. Nah. And just from reading his review of the movie, I was like, I'm absolutely not gonna see it. I'm absolutely not going to. But it does sound good and like it might even be important. So, yeah, for all of you horror, depressed horror fans. The Girl in the Yard. What's it called? The Woman in the Yard.

[Kid Fury]

The Woman in the Yard.

[Crystal]

Because, you know, black people making shit up. I almost said the Girl on the Yard. Like it was stomped the yard. But anyway.

[Kid Fury]

Right.

[Crystal]

Anyway that.

[Kid Fury]

No, it does.

[Crystal]

The way Ryan wrote about it, I was like, oh my God, this sounds good. But I will not be looking at that. It sounds like it's a little too close to home as well. So no, thanks.

[Kid Fury]

True. If you. If you can like stomach the scares and stuff. It is. It's pretty touching. It's very interesting what they. They did with it.

[Crystal]

It seemed like it pretty creepy.

[Kid Fury]

Something that's. That's if. Bitch. I have a feeling that Sinners is going to be scarier than the woman in the Artist.

[Crystal]

Perhaps. I don't even think. But I don't. There's nothing scarier than the human mind.

[Kid Fury]

The Woman in the Yard. The stuff being personal or hitting closer can make things scary.

[Crystal]

Yes, exactly. The Woman in the Yard sounds. Seems more like something that could actually happen to me or in my own life. Whereas sinners. I Feel a little, you know, a superior piece. I feel a little removed from it. Not too much. It's still America, but.

[Kid Fury]

But then it's gonna feel.

[Crystal]

I'm trying to talk about it without giving away too much because. Yeah, yeah, you know, the movie is new, but the way he wrote about, I was like, you make me want to see it, but there's no way. I won't. I will. Shall not.

[Kid Fury]

So it will. It will frighten you.

[Crystal]

It's so many.

[Kid Fury]

The next time that you.

[Crystal]

In theaters right now, My God, it's so many. It's always. I feel like. I don't know, maybe it's just there's.

[Kid Fury]

Always at least like one.

[Crystal]

It's always like. No, I feel like there's always four or five scary movies in theaters at once. All the time. Yes.

[Kid Fury]

No, it is like one or two out of each other.

[Crystal]

I'm going to look it up right now. Okay.

[Kid Fury]

See, right now there might be quite few. Oh, drop looks fun. That's not a scary movie. That's a thriller.

[Crystal]

Black bag. The woman in the yard. The working man. A working man.

[Kid Fury]

That's not a scary movie. Working man is a Jason Stan one.

[Crystal]

His boss. His daughter is taken by human traffickers. Okay, maybe that's just.

[Kid Fury]

Yes, it's like taken. It's. That's an action movie.

[Crystal]

Warfare. The Minecraft movie.

[Kid Fury]

That's an action film. That's a horror movie.

[Crystal]

The amateur and sinners.

[Kid Fury]

It's not.

[Crystal]

Okay, maybe I'm in this. Maybe I'm conflating thriller and horror. Perhaps that's what I'm doing. That's fine.

[Kid Fury]

I mean, thrillers are scary sometimes too.

[Crystal]

Yeah, that's the point. But they're scary in a way that.

[Kid Fury]

I like to be scary.

[Crystal]

You can. I don't care if you fuck with me.

[Kid Fury]

Do you know what Drop is about?

[Crystal]

Drop. Drop. I knew you were going to do that.

[Kid Fury]

I walked myself into it.

[Crystal]

Yes, it's about airdrop.

[Kid Fury]

It's an airdrop crime thriller. Oh, and I like, this lady's on a date and she's getting airdropped messages from someone who's like a killer. And they're like, you have to kill this guy you're on a date with.

[Crystal]

Oh, yes, I have seen the trailer for that.

[Kid Fury]

Um, that, to me is scarier than a ghost bitch in my front yard.

[Crystal]

You know, I'm sorry, I could. I changed my airdrop to context only. Probably eight or nine years ago when I was on the train and somebody airdropped me a picture of Travis Scott on stage going like this, being crazy.

[Kid Fury]

And that is when I would have leapt out.

[Crystal]

Listen, which one of you degenerates on. Thank God it wasn't porn. Thank God it wasn't a dick pic. But I said, I will never have my airdrop set to public. And I mean ever the fuck again. What?

[Kid Fury]

Like, why would someone do bitch. I would have stood up and said, excuse me, stand clear of the opening doors, please. I would have bitch, because I'm not going to do this with y'all. What?

[Crystal]

I said, let me cut this off right now. Lesson learned. So before y'all even go see this movie, cut the airdrop off, because somebody in the theater gonna think it's cute to play games. Don't do that. Don't do that. You can't play with me.

[Kid Fury]

I forgot we were still in black excellence. Okay, shout out to Dr. Jermaine Worl, who's made history as the youngest president in HBCU history. At the age of 39 years, young Dr. Germain began his tenure as president of Savannah State on April 1st. Congratulations. Dr. Jermaine Quarrel. Congratulations as well to VUU. Virginia Union has made history as the first HBCU in Virginia to offer a doula certification program. This program is aimed at tackling racial disparities in maternal and infant health, which I am unfortunate to have to say, we damn sure need.

[Crystal]

Yeah, it really is a problem.

[Kid Fury]

So, like, it's bad.

[Crystal]

They simply don't give a fuck about us bringing another black life into this world. Girl. Bottom on our list of black they'd.

[Kid Fury]

Rather you didn't, truly.

[Crystal]

So shout out to Virginia Union. This is an important program. Very needed doulas, midwives. They've always been part of the black birthing process, and I would love to see more young black people. People getting into it. Amen.

[Kid Fury]

Yes. And last but not least, LeBron James has a Ken doll.

[Crystal]

All right.

[Kid Fury]

$75 retail. Good. God bless you. And it was released on the 14th. Oh, yesterday.

[Crystal]

What an honor.

[Kid Fury]

The tape coincides with the release of the first black Barbie dollar. Oh, Go, cat.

[Crystal]

So they did that on purpose. I mean, it does look like him.

[Kid Fury]

Yeah, it looks just like.

[Crystal]

Down to the little grays in his beard and everything.

[Kid Fury]

So can you take the hat off? I bet you can't.

[Crystal]

Okay, that was unnecessary.

[Kid Fury]

Yeah, that was a weird. They should have gave him a little. A little basketball handbaggy.

[Crystal]

Not a handbag.

[Kid Fury]

Oh, yeah, I guess since he plays basketball.

[Crystal]

Why would it be?

[Kid Fury]

Because I was thinking of the little and not a bag of the LeBron one. I'm talking about the meme where he walks off with the bag.

[Crystal]

Oh, with his bag. Oh, yeah. When he's leaving the.

[Kid Fury]

I just want to recreate his meme.

[Crystal]

He got a fanny pack strapped across his chest like a.

[Kid Fury]

He literally does. And I'm like, with my gay ass. Where is the basketball? Who is this nigga? Why doesn't he have a basketball? He's not even fine.

[Crystal]

He look like he getting ready to see Manhattan child. He finna go, yes. Square the Brian Park. You f to stomp through dirty ass. Stanking ass midtown. Spend on a hot dog for your kid. That's what you going to do.

[Kid Fury]

Go home selling like nickels with your.

[Crystal]

Chain stuffed in the front of that fanny pack. It's cute, though. Congrats, LeBron. Seriously, I feel like every other week it's a new record here. He's broken. It's a new something like the career is just astonishing.

[Kid Fury]

So you, you guys, how's the son doing?

[Crystal]

Pretty well. You know, I think he's in and out of playing with the. Whoever LA's Development G League team is, but I think he just got his first start the other day, you know, towards the end of the season when it didn't really matter. But you know, Bronnie is. It's. It was always going to be big shoes to fill. It was always gonna be, you know.

[Kid Fury]

A nigga still play.

[Crystal]

I was really just wondering, like, how much of. Of playing in the NBA is Bronnie's dream, like, his true dream versus you're LeBron's son. And so everybody was just like, yeah. I mean, and not even necessarily from his parents, but everybody like, yeah, your dad is one of the top three basketball players to ever live, and you're his firstborn to ever live, named after him. It's kind of like I feel like the pressure was immense from a young age. That's the type of shit I get high and think about, like, how's Bronny James? Mental health.

[Kid Fury]

No, same. No saying.

[Crystal]

Cause it's a lot of pressure. And you got grown ass men. Stephen A. Smith, ish. People talking cash shit about you. Hey, I was drafted number 32 in like the fourth round. Everybody get off my dick.

[Kid Fury]

Can I just play Call of Duty's and drink Tito's and I just want to be.

[Crystal]

You know, I'm excited for.

[Kid Fury]

No, that's so true.

[Crystal]

I'm excited for that little girl. Oh, my God.

[Kid Fury]

She makes me very happy to be here.

[Crystal]

She's almost as tall as her mama. That trips me out when these.

[Kid Fury]

I haven't even seen her in a minute, child.

[Crystal]

I don't want to, child. Zuri James is growing right up. It is crazy. Just like Steph Curry. Steph Curry. Remember when Riley Curry was talking about way up? I feel blessed. Yes, she is.

[Kid Fury]

And now she's, like, in college. I can't deal with this bullshit. Like, I hate it.

[Crystal]

The kids y'all had eight or nine years ago, they still supposed to be two.

[Kid Fury]

I feel like that meme was yesterday. I way. I feel blessed. Just powerhousing through her daddy interviews. You will speak none at all today, sir. And now she's like, a young lady.

[Crystal]

Yeah, they're all just growing.

[Kid Fury]

How old am I?

[Crystal]

Seeing Paige Beckers get drafted, I'm like, how old am I?

[Kid Fury]

Number one things.

[Crystal]

Oh, well, you know, she's. That was no surprise. I think we all anticipated that. But Paige is in the league, and Taurasi's out. Like, my God. What? I'm old. I'm old. Everybody in the WNBA is younger than me now. Now that Diana.

[Kid Fury]

Remember when Blue. Remember? Wait, were they at the Grammys? I think. And Camila Cabello was on stage talking about something. And Jay Z and Beyonce. Everybody was clapping, and Blue was sitting between them and held her hand out like, simmer down. Thank you. Thank you. Everybody comes in.

[Crystal]

Y'all are clapping so aggressively.

[Kid Fury]

I feel like that just happened.

[Crystal]

And the next thing you know, Blue.

[Kid Fury]

Is 13, taller than her mama, being.

[Crystal]

In movies, acting, performing around the world, tinting her grandma, about to have her own. Did you see her doing Ms. Tina's eyebrows on Instagram?

[Kid Fury]

Yes.

[Crystal]

An esthetician on top of everything else.

[Kid Fury]

I can't take it.

[Crystal]

The kids, they're growing up. They're growing up.

[Kid Fury]

They are growing up. And it seems like for the most part, they're gonna be fine. They tired of us. They might be coming to, you know, having underground plans on how to just, I don't know, build a ship and get far, far away from this place.

[Crystal]

Well, and I don't blame them. Yeah. Cannot really blame the youth on that.

[Kid Fury]

I'll sweep out the caboose if you.

[Crystal]

Want to take me with you back. Y'all like gumbo? You like baked good?

[Kid Fury]

You know you need your gumbo.

[Crystal]

Do you need a mammy titty? You want to come over here, cry.

[Kid Fury]

A little bit now it's going to be my mammy titty. Or it's. It's the on love now. You know what you want now.

[Crystal]

Who. Who do you want to come cry? Whose bosoms you want to come cry in because I'm right here.

[Kid Fury]

The actual therapist. Or do you want.

[Crystal]

Cause I look, I don't even smell like old grease. That's all I'm saying.

[Kid Fury]

I'm just. One of us is gonna make you stick your head in under to think about your life.

[Crystal]

That I'm so glad that show had to get. That show had to go. It had to.

[Kid Fury]

It really did. I miss it. But you know what? There are reruns.

[Crystal]

Too many people thought that Iyanla was. Even though she was clear that she was not a therapist and this was not therapy, too many people acted like it was anyway. Too many people thought that the way Iyanla behaves is the way a therapist is supposed to behave. It had to get off tv. I'm so sorry.

[Kid Fury]

It's like if some of the really extreme, weird experiments and activities were like, this is so profound. This is. It's very peculiar. I would have never even thought to do no shit like this. But this is actually really weird and effective. Is Iyanla a genius? Like, then that would be something. But it would just be like, what the. So you have him holding 14 baby bu. Baby alive or whatever. And that's supposed to make him do what? Pay his child support? Hey, what are we doing?

[Crystal]

Like causing more trauma. Make it are worse off. You got Hazel E talking to.

[Kid Fury]

Now that was.

[Crystal]

Look at Harriet Tubman and read them lyrics like, bitch. What?

[Kid Fury]

Only thing she got popped was a whip.

[Crystal]

Pop my butt.

[Kid Fury]

The only thing that popped up her butt was a whip. Remember she called Nephi a vile gutter snipe right out the hood.

[Crystal]

A horrible look. This is not a mental health professional. Therapist aside, this is not a mental health care professional. Please, this is for entertainment purposes only. I just. Oh, Anyway. Anyway. Hey, y'all. This episode of the Read is brought to you by Squarespace. We love Squarespace over here at the Read. They are the number one all in one perfect platform to get your website off and running. Okay. They give you everything you need to offer services and get paid all in one place. From consultations to events and experiences, Showcase your offerings with a customizable website designed to attract clients and grow your business. With Blueprint AI, Squarespace's AI enhanced website builder, you can quickly create a personalized site that aligns with your brand and goals. Plus, Squarespace also streamlines your workflow with built in tools for appointment scheduling, email marketing, invoicing, and seamless online payments to keep your business running smoothly and ensure you're paid on time. I Do love Squarespace. We have been using Squarespace over here at the Read and for our own personal websites and different ventures for years and years now, maybe almost 10 years, because it is so easy to do. It's easy to sign up, easy to get a design together, and easy to start making money and showing off what you offer through Squarespace and their incredible website design capabilities. So if you're ready to launch your site, head to squarespace.com the read to start your free trial. And when you're ready to launch, use offer code the read to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. Again, that's squarespace.com thereid let them know Kiff here and Crystal sent you. Everyone knows the best things in life come when you don't settle. That's why switching to Metro is a great choice. Because at Metro, you don't just get great deals. You get even more of what you love. You shouldn't have to put up with the yada yada you find with other carriers. Things like hidden fees, contracts, underwhelming deals like, girl, this is boring and I don't care. This is all a flat flop. Where is the newness? Where is the freshness? That's why at Metro, you can get great deals on 5G devices from top brands like Samsung. With no contracts, no credit checks, no exploding bills, and nada. Yada yada. That's wireless without the gotcha. With more 5G phones to choose from and incredible deals, you'll never feel like you're accepting less than what you deserve. Stop by your neighborhood Metro store and learn about their amazing deals. Go to metrobyt mobile.com stores to find a location near you.

[Kid Fury]

Coachella is active. Missy Elliott is out there giving the girls what they need. Glorilla Tyler, Lady Gaga.

[Crystal]

That was great.

[Kid Fury]

Prodigy. I really wanted to see Prodigy. I want to talk about Meg.

[Crystal]

Oh, we got to. Got to.

[Kid Fury]

I want to talk about Meg. I want to talk about the beauty. I want to talk about the body. I want to talk about the music. I want to talk about Ciara coming out to perform goodies during Rocksteady. Thank you, Megan. Thank you, Ciara. Thank you to both teams. Thank you to the drivers. Thank you to the dis. Thank you to everybody catering, everybody who allowed this to take place for an old bitch like me that I guess is old. And not only am I old bitch, I heard goodies for the first time in my fucking stereo CD player.

[Crystal]

Yeah, yeah.

[Kid Fury]

In the morning, I had the radio on to 99Jams and this new fucking song came out, and I was like, what is this, Bob? That was my discovering of Ciara. Then coming to find out the girl can dance. I have loved that video and song. I've talked about this endlessly. So when she came out and she does the song, I was overjoyed with hearing it. But, bitch, when they got to that fucking chorus and she and Megan and me did the choreography to Goodies, I screamed the way that Megan screamed when Sierra came out.

[Crystal]

That's how I screamed when my dad came out. I mean, I learned when my daddy came out on that stage and did a verse. Bitch, don't talk to me. First of all, that's already one of my favorite songs on Megan Part two that I. Wishing you the best, bitch. That's what you get.

[Kid Fury]

That's what you get. Yeah.

[Crystal]

Obsessed with that. Anyway. Anyway, I'm about to hype myself back up, so. Right Already love that song. Bringing out a true icon, a legend, and having her. So having her do that verse and then having her do unity and Megan, I just feel like that is. It was just so beautiful to see Meg. Not to see Meg. Not just to see her reach out to all these other people and have them come out, join her. Victoria Monet, let's just go ahead and take a quick detour there, if we can. The homosexuality was dripping off the stage. Like, okay, I know both of you are openly, you know, wavy. Yeah, both of y'all. Like, I do, like, a little lick a licker every now and then. You know, I like me a little taste.

[Kid Fury]

Megan was on basically, like, when are you gonna let me fudge?

[Crystal]

The way she was looking at Victoria, I'm like, okay, yes, I know y'all are entertainers. You're supposed to give a show. You know, you're supposed to be looking like, damn, I want to fuck you, but, girl, you did that a little too well. Like, you over here humping her butts, staring her down. Like, do I need to leave y'all? I feel like I need to leave you alone. Like, y'all want some privacy anyway? Yeah, I. I love not just that, you know, Megan reaches out to all these different people, but that they come, you know, like, to see public support of Meg after all the shit she's been through really does warm my heart. But. Oh, nigga, the absolute funniest part was them big feet, them Bigfoots that she had. I forgot about that.

[Kid Fury]

I forgot about that. I forgot about that.

[Crystal]

If you missed it, she absolutely brought out. If y'all remember last year The. The pink girl put out that. Was it a song or an album or the Pink. The Pink party. Pink album lady.

[Kid Fury]

Anyway, love Pink.

[Crystal]

The. It's. I mean it's an. It's an incredible. Oh, okay, sorry. No missed that. But.

[Kid Fury]

I actually have to send you that clip. It is so funny.

[Crystal]

Called Bigfoot. And I don't making fun of Megan because her right. It was. Was. It was a bad song. It was a. A weak ass concert. Disappointing beef that is a whole foot taller than you. Of course her foot is bigger. Who cares? But Megan says speaking of Bigfoot, I got two of them right here. And I do mean right here in the background.

[Kid Fury]

Hilarious.

[Crystal]

So going to get going to get your. Get up on your good foot.

[Kid Fury]

Anyway, like, why is Bigfoot in the desert? Hilarious.

[Crystal]

Yes. So that was a very fun. Very entertaining. But yeah, adore Meg. Love to see her getting the. The praise and support she deserves.

[Kid Fury]

Kendrick Lamar and SZ's latest video Luther has been released this past week and I kind of love it. It's very pretty. It's very sexy. It's very intimate and it makes it a little bit different. And while it has like an extended.

[Crystal]

Luther sample throughout the video, which just.

[Kid Fury]

Really sets the vibe.

[Crystal]

Yes. I love the way that the original song is kind of woven throughout the video. You. You should know it. But just in case you don't, Kendrick was like, you're not going to get away from it.

[Kid Fury]

I mean, their parents probably made love to like dangerously in love. They were probably, you know, conceived to like Maya.

[Crystal]

Okay. Now I'm. I mean, now I don't feel well. You're probably correct though about that. So. Yeah.

[Kid Fury]

But yeah, it was a video. Gorgeous.

[Crystal]

It was very sweet.

[Kid Fury]

Directed by an icon, one Karina Evans, known for directing things like Gossip Girl. She also directed the video for Garden, which is my favorite song by sza. She also has directed the videos for In My Feelings, God's plan. Nice. For what? All Drake's best videos.

[Crystal]

Oh, true.

[Kid Fury]

That's extremely true as well. But yeah, new video out. I thought they both looked great after. The video was a perfect fit for this.

[Crystal]

It is sexy. It is.

[Kid Fury]

And made me want to listen to the R B and soul that my parents did listen to because that's what I. Yeah, I did grow up listening.

[Crystal]

Right.

[Kid Fury]

Luther.

[Crystal]

Luther was played for me by the olds in my life.

[Kid Fury]

I mean, Barry White.

[Crystal]

Oh, absolutely. First, last and everything.

[Kid Fury]

Talk about the name of children. Yeah. Oh, God. Speaking of romance, Tony Braxton, Birdman have been married for. Sorry, this is not a joke.

[Crystal]

Oh, okay.

[Kid Fury]

Yeah. Tony Braxton and Birdman have been married for eight months. Okay. Documents.

[Crystal]

Okay. Never mind. Sorry.

[Kid Fury]

Love. They're doing this for love and something. This is true. You in love? I'm a sign I can lose. The only reason. They. They got married on the 8th of August, very quietly, very secret, very privately. And the marriage date is listed in divorce documents that Tony filed two weeks later. What?

[Crystal]

So. So they were married. They. They are married, or. They were married.

[Kid Fury]

They are married, but they're getting divorced.

[Crystal]

So she filed for divorce two weeks after she married him. What the fuck did he do?

[Kid Fury]

I mean, I could take a handsome guest to about four different people.

[Crystal]

Yeah, you could. Yeah, you could.

[Kid Fury]

Okay, so their date of separation was listed two days after the marriage.

[Crystal]

Why did you. Y'all could have got this. A nugget. Get this.

[Kid Fury]

A nugget.

[Crystal]

Go delete, delete, delete.

[Kid Fury]

Right?

[Crystal]

Were y'all high?

[Kid Fury]

I feel like you can return a Big Mac in this amount of time.

[Crystal]

This two days, like, what you mean?

[Kid Fury]

In January 2025, Tony dismissed the divorce petition, and Birdman signed off on it.

[Crystal]

Oh, so they're not. So she filed, and then she came back. Okay, I guess this sounds very unhealthy. This sounds.

[Kid Fury]

It really does.

[Crystal]

Like a very bad dynamic seminary.

[Kid Fury]

Right?

[Crystal]

Yep.

[Kid Fury]

Okay.

[Crystal]

I mean, Tony, blink. Blink twice if you're safe. Like, what?

[Kid Fury]

I don't know what the fuck is going on over there. That's.

[Crystal]

It just seems like. Haven't they been through, like, a bunch of ups and downs? Ain't it always like, Tony and Birdman are together? No, they broke up. No, they not.

[Kid Fury]

Like, I feel like I've heard about them breaking up at least once, but, I mean, I hear about celebrity couples breaking up all the time, so I don't really pay that much attention to. The one I really stopped paying attention to is. What's his name? Ray J and Princess.

[Crystal]

Oh, my God.

[Kid Fury]

It's something wrong with Ray J that I always see going back and forth between whether or not they're together. Like, even just this past week, I believe I saw something where they were at the Millennium Tour, and they were kissing. They were making out of the Millennium Tour. And then Princess put on her Instagram stories next day, like, I'm never drinking ever again. Don't. Don't ever mix tequila with Tito's. Ooh.

[Crystal]

God damn. Yeah, you wanted that.

[Kid Fury]

And then he went on his page and was like, you know, she tasted real good. You know, I love her, but I don't like her right now. She's my everything, but I'm nothing to her.

[Crystal]

Like, he's just like, you gotta grow up, little nigga.

[Kid Fury]

Like Ray J.

[Crystal]

It's something wrong with Ray J because he. Yeah, okay.

[Kid Fury]

You agree?

[Crystal]

Yeah. That thing he posted on Instagram about Brandy not liking him, Brandy hating him, being like, my sister don't like me because of the way that I am. I'm like, oh, God damn. Have you considered growing the up? Then I saw him. I saw a clip of him with Kai Sonat, and he's talking about how he feel left out because he don't get invited to take showers and spend the night like the other niggas do.

[Kid Fury]

Oh, you mean like Kevin Hart and them when they be sleeping over his house?

[Crystal]

He was like, y'all. Y'all call me. I wanna. I wanna shower. I'll get in the shower with you. N. I. First of all, you. Yes, you're. And so is Kevin Hart. But like, you're 40 on Twitch, begging a 20 year old to be your friend. That don't feel pathetic to you? That don't feel a. Just a bit loser. Ish.

[Kid Fury]

Kevin's kids probably love the fact that he does that.

[Crystal]

I mean, and please don't, Please, please don't make me, like, defend or say something nice about Kevin Hart right now. But Kevin Hart has a real career like, that he worked for and, you know, talent. And I have not seen Ray J do anything talented since like 2002. What. What do. What does Ray J do? Them glasses that he said couldn't break and then Charlamagne broke them. The Scooty bites.

[Kid Fury]

Don't talk about that.

[Crystal]

We don't talk about like.

[Kid Fury]

And I don't think that was Charlamagne.

[Crystal]

Kevin Hart is actually relevant. Like, he does something. Yeah, you're Brandi's brother.

[Kid Fury]

Nobody wants to see you on that stream or anywhere else.

[Crystal]

I mean, you don't do anything.

[Kid Fury]

The reason he calls Drew Ski, Kevin Hart and them niggas of theirs, because those are like the demo. His audience likes them.

[Crystal]

Those people are popular and currently working.

[Kid Fury]

But to Crystal's point, you 40 plus at this child's house.

[Crystal]

Ty, man, you want to sit.

[Kid Fury]

I want to take showers and sleep over. Ray.

[Crystal]

Pause, pause, pause, pause. Because I know what it sound like, bro. Like, fully clothed, obviously, but I want to get in the shower with you niggas.

[Kid Fury]

No, it's still call. Okay, I blame Sonia.

[Crystal]

Cause and then saying something gay. I don't care. I don't care. I just looked at that and I thought, you really have to Be hurting to be begging somebody 25 years younger than you to hang out with you and be your friend. Like things aren't. Things aren't going well for Ray J, I don't think.

[Kid Fury]

Ah, it's that tour. What if it's a curse?

[Crystal]

The curse of being a. A man who's been on the millennium tour. Oh, okay.

[Kid Fury]

No, I'm talking about, like, something fun, all right? Like what? Like my imagination. Like, what if you go on the millennium tour and everyone except Omarion is cursed because he's the only one who never complains when the tour.

[Crystal]

He's probably making the most money.

[Kid Fury]

He's the only everybody else miserable, everybody else missing an eye. Just, you know, new divorce, crazy case, late. I think everybody.

[Crystal]

It's always some shit except Omarion.

[Kid Fury]

And Omarion just moonwalking tore over. You don't hear nothing from none of them.

[Crystal]

That's so true. Huh.

[Kid Fury]

Maybe it's a curse.

[Crystal]

Maybe.

[Kid Fury]

Let me stop before I give Bet an idea. Did you hear that? They're remaking. Okay, not remaking. They're spin off. They're spinning off the Varnell Hill character. I can't speak from our end. Tommy Davis.

[Crystal]

Is that Tommy Davis? Okay, sorry, sorry, sorry.

[Kid Fury]

Did you miss me? Like that character.

[Crystal]

Is it you? Hold on.

[Kid Fury]

He's like a TV host.

[Crystal]

Isn't this.

[Kid Fury]

They're giving him his own show on BC Plus.

[Crystal]

Isn't this 30 years overdue?

[Kid Fury]

No. Yeah. No. I don't know what it would like. I don't. I know what the. Who the character is.

[Crystal]

Right.

[Kid Fury]

But I don't really know what the plot itself might be.

[Crystal]

Is Varnell still doing his show after all these years? Is it like, here's. But the thing is, Varnell was. This is so niche. This wasn't some beloved character.

[Kid Fury]

Right. He's only seen.

[Crystal]

He was barely there. Right. So this is like. I mean, this is like a high analog interesting. Like black people are working. That's good. But this feels like, you know, 1996 would have been the perfect time to do this. Right now, I'm just sort of confused.

[Kid Fury]

But it could still be interesting because Tommy Davidson obviously is no less talented, I believe.

[Crystal]

Yeah, for sure.

[Kid Fury]

I imagine it'll probably be some sort of thing where maybe he's trying to make a comeback or get back in TV and he's not able to keep up with the way things have changed. Like, that's is going to probably be pretty straightforward. But to your point, it's just like, yeah, Varnell was in those two episodes where he, like, Tried to ruin Martin's life or career. But there are, I think, other characters in the show who could be primed for a spin off. First of all, talking about Shananny spin off forever. And they were talking about Shanae and Wanda spin off in the R movie. And then we never got that.

[Crystal]

Those people. What about we need a. We need a spin off for somebody who's not played by Martin.

[Kid Fury]

For Martin and Jamie.

[Crystal]

No.

[Kid Fury]

Remember Martin and Jamie. Jamie was hosting the dc.

[Crystal]

I do, I do, I do.

[Kid Fury]

And they did that sketch, and everybody was like, oh, my gosh, make this a movie. And they're like, yeah, we're gonna do it.

[Crystal]

Don't. I mean, and it's for the best that they didn't.

[Kid Fury]

Honestly, I think so Martin spin offs. Tashina was supposed to have one, and then they never made it. In the last season, she got a job at a record label, and there was a whole episode that was. It was basically like a pilot for that.

[Crystal]

Oh, okay.

[Kid Fury]

And it was fun. And they never made it.

[Crystal]

Damn.

[Kid Fury]

I picked that back up to. Gina Arnold is a working actor that's no less talented. Probably far more talented, if anything. Now we could do that. Everybody know, like, that's.

[Crystal]

Maybe she'll be working on the Varnell Hill show or maybe she'll be somebody they reach out to. Oh, no, not working on his show. But, like, maybe. Because a radio station obviously has a lot of contact with record labels or representatives from record labels. So maybe she's bringing in artists to be interviewed on the show or something like that. I'm just saying to try to type.

[Kid Fury]

I want Pam to be the lead.

[Crystal]

Oh, well, fair. And Pam is a character we actually know, so.

[Kid Fury]

And, like, the problem is that we talked about.

[Crystal]

Y'all should have did this in the 90s. In the 90s. Why are we doing this now?

[Kid Fury]

In the 90s would have been like, a really.

[Crystal]

Would have been great.

[Kid Fury]

It would have been prime time. I mean, and there would there. The 90s and early 2000s. They're like 15 Martin spinoffs. Could have been possible.

[Crystal]

Yep. Really could have.

[Kid Fury]

And now we're talking about Varnell of all of them.

[Crystal]

But I like Tommy Davidson. So it's like, yeah, go ahead and make. Like I said, a high and a low. It's like, Maya. God forgive me. Maya Campbell seems to be doing so well. She seems to be in a really good place. If you don't know. She has had, I think, an assortment of mental health issues. She's not been doing great in the past, but she seems to be doing well, looking really healthy and good now. So I was like, I love to see this Maya Campbell, like, one of the original baddies from my childhood. Just, like, so fine, so talented child. And then in that very same breath, she was talking about how she wants to get her mother's story told. And what she was talking about actually sounded interesting. And then she said, so if somebody could put me in touch with Tyler Perry. Tyler Perry, if you could hear this, if you listening to this, I would love for you to produce my mother's story. And I was like, see, it's always, the Lord gives and then the Lord takes. Because.

[Kid Fury]

A lot of us. This is why.

[Crystal]

I'm so sorry. I was just like, are you. Are you doing that? I don't know. You might not be doing that.

[Kid Fury]

Why would you have to branch out? This is why the girls. Why would you have to let other people write things for them or. And. Or direct things? So this is why we have to spread. This is why I love people like Issa of House Ray. This is why girls like Lena of House Waite, who I can say from my experience and from things that I've seen are like, oh, this is the door that's opened for me. Hey, everyone, come on.

[Crystal]

You know Lady Brunson, because of House Abbott.

[Kid Fury]

House Abbott's Lady Brunson, first of her name. You see what I'm saying?

[Crystal]

I do.

[Kid Fury]

Bringing in the girls new as well as the girls iconic, legendary of yore. And that's just so crazy. It helps, I think, because the girls are gonna be like, oh, I need a movie to be made. A black movie.

[Crystal]

Let me call Tyler Perry. Yep. It's just like, there are other people out here, sweetie. But I do, you know, I. I do get it. I don't want my moment of, like, girl, really, Tyler, of all people. Let's just. Let's just stay hydrated and meditate a little bit more.

[Kid Fury]

Like anything, I'll get people to watch it. Because one of you niggas just hit me talking about, I think Duplicity explains how she got on a boat in acrimony. You're not going to terrorize me.

[Crystal]

Duplicity.

[Kid Fury]

I'm not gonna allow you to do this. His latest, okay, I promise you, this just opens his thesaurus, flips through the page with his eyes closed and picks a word, and then he just makes a movie based on its definition. Loosely.

[Crystal]

I've never even heard of this.

[Kid Fury]

You don't need to.

[Crystal]

Wow.

[Kid Fury]

I don't know if it's a show or a movie.

[Crystal]

He just always. He's just always doing some shit.

[Kid Fury]

He just picks a big word and then just makes a movie. Ubiquitous.

[Crystal]

He went. You know what he did?

[Kid Fury]

Cromulent, starring Aaron Pierre.

[Crystal]

Please let me get it out.

[Kid Fury]

And Ryan Destiny, please.

[Crystal]

He went to Google and he typed in synonym for dishonest.

[Kid Fury]

That's what I'm saying. That's what I'm saying.

[Crystal]

And thesaurus.com came back with duplicity. And he was like, that's it.

[Kid Fury]

God damn it. Brilliant. I'm a genius. Three or more syllables.

[Crystal]

That's it.

[Kid Fury]

I hate it.

[Crystal]

God bless all the black actors and.

[Kid Fury]

Biggin, starring Kiki Palmer.

[Crystal]

Doing our best.

[Kid Fury]

Oh, yes. I far this. That was. There was one more.

[Crystal]

Okay, you let me know I was.

[Kid Fury]

Having a good time. What was the last one I wanted to mention? Oh, it's not that important. It was just. Brian Steele, young Thug's attorney, has just joined Puffy's defense team. And the reason I mentioned.

[Crystal]

Oh, wow.

[Kid Fury]

Or the reason it stood out to me, because besides, you know, the obvious, I guess, is that I didn't know who Brian Steele was when I looked. Drake has the song on that new album with him and Party Next Door called Brian Steele, and I actually like it.

[Crystal]

Wow.

[Kid Fury]

But I didn't know. It's like, literally one of the two songs on that album. I like that one. Didn't give me a hug. But, yeah, I had no idea who Brian Steele was that. Didn't really care. And so when I saw his name, I was like. I went back to listen to it and I'm like, oh. He says something about, like, shot Brian Steele. I'm geek for the guys. There's no line where he said something about shot Brian Steele. Take the cuffs off. We outside, some shit like that. I'm like, oh. He was talking about Thug's lawyer freeing him or helping to get him free. And I guess now he's working for Puffy.

[Crystal]

Well, I mean, didn't. Didn't Thug end up pleading guilty anyway? Like, never mind. It's quite different when you're actually guilty. I be forgetting that, like, lawyers have to try to do what's best for you and get you in the least amount of trouble, even if you absolutely did that shit.

[Kid Fury]

So, yeah, no. Yeah.

[Crystal]

Good luck to y'all. I'm so glad I'm not an attorney because to some people, I would not be able to defeat.

[Kid Fury]

Oh, yeah. No, it's meant for a specific type of.

[Crystal]

Yeah. And I'm not that one. I am not that girl neither.

[Kid Fury]

But girl, baby, somebody else wasn't either who is an attorney because he just lost one. Then just skip it all Somebody was like not only I've learned am I in things? Yes. He said matter of fact I don't even want to hear about that bitch.

[Crystal]

I can't even look at this the same no more.

[Kid Fury]

Your honor don't even say bad. And boy in the same I'm just.

[Crystal]

I gotta get away from this. Brian still said that ain't no problem. That ain't no problem.

[Kid Fury]

Brian still. Brian still said have you. Have you heard sexy songs for Sam for sometimes. Hello. Yeah. So what day do we start?

[Crystal]

Oh, it's ghetto over here.

[Kid Fury]

We'll see where that goes. I'll just mention Soulja Boy in my read. Okay, that's fun because he you niggas are lost. But that'll be it for hot dogs searching the hot box.

[Crystal]

Whatever.

[Kid Fury]

I call this bullshit. Bye. Hey y'all. I don't know about you. I'm definitely starting to feel like the generations prior to me because I feel like I remember when everything costed a nickel. Everything is expensive now. Like way more expensive than I remember. And the last thing that I'm trying to do is rack up credit card debt at this point Place in this age and this race, baby cakes. There is a better way. You can build credit with money you set aside and avoid interest or expensive debt with Chime's Credit Builder card. It's a secured credit card with no credit check or minimum deposit required. No annual fees, interest or credit check to apply and you can use it everywhere Visa credit cards are accepted. You can even get paid up to two days early with direct deposit, which means you'll get access to your money sooner. Turn your everyday purchases and on time payments into steps towards your financial goals with Chimes. Secured Credit Builder Visa Credit Card get started [e-mail] threed that's chime.com the read Chime feels like progress. The Chime Credit Builder Visa credit card is issued by the Bancorp Bank NA or Stride bank na. Spot me. Eligibility requirements and overdraft limits apply. Chime Checking Account required to apply out of network ATM withdrawal and OTC advance fees may apply. Timing depends on of payment file. Late payment may negatively impact your credit score. Results may vary. Go to chime.com disclosures for details.

[Crystal]

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[Kid Fury]

All right, folks, we're back, and it's time to hear from you and your letters.

[Crystal]

Yes, it is. Send your questions to AskTheRead gmail.com. we may read them aloud on the show. Uh, let's see here. Well, we have some for the. For the sports enthusiast, but I don't know that he's me today. Okay.

[Kid Fury]

No, I'm not.

[Crystal]

I was gonna say, are you ready to answer this question about the WNBA offseason? I don't think you are.

[Kid Fury]

No.

[Crystal]

But we do at some point. Not you, because you'll never know, but me and the people who know. We need to talk about Paige and az. We need to talk about the rumors.

[Kid Fury]

Like, I mean, come on.

[Crystal]

Because let me tell you something. I'm old, okay? So I stay out of young lit bitches business. I do, period. I've seen. I'm on TikTok, so I've seen the rumors, obviously. But again, I mind old bitch business. I mind, you know, born in the 1900s business.

[Kid Fury]

Yeah. Oh, my God. We have to say that.

[Crystal]

Now. The fact that. But the fact that AZ was not just at the table. Now, mind you, it's nobody at the table but Gino, Paige, Mama Paige, Daddy, Paige and az.

[Kid Fury]

I'm just saying.

[Crystal]

And the first person Paige hugged after she got drafted was az. The first person she hugged was Azy. I'm not saying. I'm just saying. Now, please excuse Amy if I got it wrong, but I see it. I am now a believer. Anyway, we'll talk about that later. Our first letter this week comes from PNW Rose, who says I've been blissfully married for 14 years. We have really been through it, especially in the beginning because of our 18 year age difference. We didn't realize there were that many years between us until an Earth, Wind and Fire song came on. And I said, oh, my mama had us cleaning the house with this. And she said she first heard it in the club. But we were already in love. And I was 35, too grown to pass on love. Now I would just say, you're 35. Y'all have an 18 year age gap. That means she was 53. So I'm gonna let y'all have that. Normally I would be like, 18 year age gap girl, what the fuck? But if you were 35, I'ma let that go, obviously. Okay, so anyway, we love trash TV. Love after lockup, love at first sight, 90 day franchise, all of it.

[Kid Fury]

That's documentary.

[Crystal]

So we were watching Summer House, the episode where Jesse Solomon gets his toe sucked. We love to pause the TV and debate, laugh, discuss, et cetera. So when Paige and them were telling Jesse how problematic it was to get his toe sucked, I said, as soon as you walk in the room, it's cheating. Anything that could be considered sexual is cheating. Except, of course, watching porn or masturbating. My spouse stopped me right there and said, wait, you masturbate? I said, yeah, why not? It's not all the time. Anyway, she broke down in tears.

[Kid Fury]

In tears.

[Crystal]

I'm a femme and she's an old school dyke. Feels like I should have just come to her for sex or said I was feeling horny. But to me, this has nothing to do with her. Sometimes I can't get to sleep or one of us is out of town or some weed made me feel away and I don't want a whole session. I also don't like being the aggressor sexually. Our sex life is slower, but still steamy and satisfying. That's a tongue twister. But my darling Studsman is equating masturbating. So who knows what the fuck? Because she won't talk to me. She says she needs time to think about how she's gonna handle this. I'm not sorry. It's my body. I'll do what I want. And I don't think I should feel guilty. I'm not pleasuring myself and then uninterested in having sex with her. It has nothing to do with her. So what do y'all think about all this? Should I feel guilty for masturbating? Do you think we're headed towards divorce? Thanks. Pnw. Rose. Rose.

[Kid Fury]

Okay. I've heard of this type of spat in, like, in relationships before. And for the people on your partner's side or from her perspective, I'm just like, I don't get it, but if I love you, I should try. I just feel like I would be like, is this a legit concern of yours or do you want to argue with me right now? Like, is this a. I don't know if that's a protective response, but I'm just like, are you actually feeling some type of way about this specifically? Or are you like, do you wanna argue? Like, are you. Cause some people like fighting. Some people like to like to fuss at you for a reason to, like, make up. Cause they find that, like, I honestly feel like motherfuckers be bored. And so they fight sometimes.

[Crystal]

I am sure.

[Kid Fury]

Now this could vary. Like, I laughed. I feel like my initial response would be like, are you legit?

[Crystal]

Right? Is it a joke? I would think it was a joke.

[Kid Fury]

Fun. Fun. Fussing, right? Because this is my living body. I may do with it as I please. The same way you may do with your body.

[Crystal]

Yeah.

[Kid Fury]

What you. You like if you. If I want to bust in and you're in the shower or you're taking a bath, relaxing, or. Or who. Fixing the something cook, whatever.

[Crystal]

Right.

[Kid Fury]

Should I come interrupt you?

[Crystal]

No, no, you shouldn't.

[Kid Fury]

Should I wait when I could just do it myself?

[Crystal]

Why.

[Kid Fury]

I don't understand. So if I were to get to the place where I realized, like, this is actually something that's legitimately bothering you, coming from a place, I think I would want to understand where that place is. Maybe try to help you understand where that place is so that you can unpack that, you know, with the people who need to help you unpack it. Or you just do that over the. Yeah, but it isn't fair or even logical, I think, to villainize your partner for masturbating.

[Crystal]

It's.

[Kid Fury]

It doesn't make sense.

[Crystal]

It does not make sense to me either. And the way she is responding to it, I think is. Is more of a red flag for me than even that she feels that way. Like the feeling itself is weird enough, right? But now she won' and she needs time to think about how she's gonna handle this. You need time to think about how you're gonna handle me touching my own body? Did you think I never played with my own pussy? It's. You're joking, right? Like, first of all, sex between two women. Two women is going to last for a minimum of 45 minutes. Sometimes you just want to chicka chicka and get on out of there. Like, I'm not, I'm not trying to devote, you know, hours to having sex with you every single time I feel like having sex. And again, this is my body. I've been touching on this body all my life. Like, no, I'm not gonna feel bad about it. So should you feel guilty? Of course not. Whether y'all end up heading for divorce, I think is going to depend on whether your wife can get over herself. Like, I agree, you, she's having some, some sort of existential crisis because you touch on your own parts. Is, is a therapist available? Because at this point you said y'all been married for 14 years, y'all fell in love when you were 35. So you're roughly sure in the club.

[Kid Fury]

This is a lot for her.

[Crystal]

So you're 49. That means she's what, 67 now? I'm not explaining to no 67 year old dyke that I like to touch myself.

[Kid Fury]

What are you talking about? So I'm like, are you, do you want to just fight with me? Like, do you want to just like argue?

[Crystal]

I actually love that question. I don't think that question is particularly helpful in the overall sense. I think it'll probably make things a little worse. But it's funny and it's what I would want.

[Kid Fury]

I feel like it would have been like an impulse reaction for me. I'm not saying that's what you should say.

[Crystal]

I would have, I think I would have said, are you high? Are you, Are you high? Right?

[Kid Fury]

I would have said something like, are you tweaking?

[Crystal]

Let me look at that weed. What's in this?

[Kid Fury]

Like, are you, Are you joking?

[Crystal]

Yeah.

[Kid Fury]

Do you have a camera? Does this feel like this?

[Crystal]

I would laugh, Yes. I would laugh so hard I would think you were joking. Like, you can't be serious. I should have just come to you.

[Kid Fury]

I agree.

[Crystal]

What if I didn't have an hour and a half to bust a nut? What if I just wanted to get it over with and go about my day? I should have come to you every time. What if you're out of town? What if you're at work? What if, like you said, I. I smoked some weed and now I'm horny? Like it, child.

[Kid Fury]

What if I just want this nut to be by myself, on my own little groove and my own little thing, like sometimes. Much like the bath that I just referenced before. You just want to take a bath?

[Crystal]

Yeah, I just want you don't want.

[Kid Fury]

The nigga to leave the house while you take a bath. You know what I mean? You can just.

[Crystal]

That's just me time this.

[Kid Fury]

I don't understand why this is.

[Crystal]

You know, it really shouldn't be. And it doesn't have to be something that y'all break up behind. Hopefully, hopefully she takes no more than a month to figure this out for herself and get back to normal. Because.

[Kid Fury]

And honestly, I think the month is.

[Crystal]

Considering y'all gay and y'all been together for 14 years. Because let me tell you something, If I'm talking to somebody for 14 days and she'd be like, you can't touch yourself, sweetie. We're never speaking again ever again. I'm. I'm simply not responding to your phone calls or text messages. You're blocked.

[Kid Fury]

Are you okay?

[Crystal]

No, you're not.

[Kid Fury]

And what do you think?

[Crystal]

To say thank you for telling me up front that you wasn't okay. Thank you so much for telling me before I could.

[Kid Fury]

Who knows when I would have found out otherwise?

[Crystal]

14 years deep. When I met. 14 years later.

[Kid Fury]

Watching Tiger King. Oh, you. You flicked the beans. Tears. She didn't even walk in on you.

[Crystal]

Shit.

[Kid Fury]

You just were like, oh, yeah, I masturbate crying.

[Crystal]

I'd be worried because y'all. Because y'all have been locked in for 14 years. I would give it a month for her to snap out of this.

[Kid Fury]

Yeah, I think she'll.

[Crystal]

And after that, you need to call somebody. You need to call your dyke sister circle. You need to tap in. You need to call. There's actually this. An older, very incredibly attractive black stud mask, Like, I don't know what she calls herself, but she has like a podcast and maybe you need to reach out to her. See, do she have some advice for you or something?

[Kid Fury]

But that's that light skinned lady.

[Crystal]

No, no, no, she's not light skinned. She's a pretty brown. I saw her. She interviewed Woody Hoochie. Daddy's Woody.

[Kid Fury]

Oh, okay.

[Crystal]

The Britney Grinder free Brittney Griner video. Woody.

[Kid Fury]

Yes.

[Crystal]

Oh, I saw the clip. Cause Woody. I follow Woody on Instagram and she posted a clip talking about how she don't like light skinned girls and she don't like skinny girls. So get away from her with all of that. But anyway, I love listening. You gonna have to reach out. You gonna have to find somebody to help you work through this. But I'm not going to stop masturbating. I'm not going to lie to you and say that I'm going to Stop masturbating. You are being absurd and you need to figure this out. Good luck. Good luck.

[Kid Fury]

Considering there could be something, you know, very deep that is attached to this for her that she does speak to somebody about, and maybe within that month that Crystal mentioned, you'll figure that out. And so when you know and she can go and figure that out, however, she does have to, regardless of whether she is cognizant of it, is verbal about it, she has to recognize that the way that she's treating you is absurd.

[Crystal]

Right.

[Kid Fury]

And so the next step we take is what? Because I'm going to play with my pips.

[Crystal]

That's mine. And that's the longest short of it. Sweetie, it's mine. It's built right in. What do you mean? Half the time I touch it, I don't even try to. It's just right there. Like, what are you, bitch?

[Kid Fury]

And with everything this motherfucker puts me. Shut up. I do what I want with it. Who are you, the government?

[Crystal]

Best of luck, Rose. Let us know. And either way. Either way, she needs to open up her damn mouth and communicate about how she's feeling This. I refuse to talk about it. That's not gonna fly for too damn long in my home. You gonna open your mouth and do something? You finna use that mouth, though? All right. Our next letter comes from Ben, who says. Hey, y'all. I've been working on my anxious attachment for years, but I feel like I'm not getting anywhere close to being secure. My boyfriend, I. My boyfriend and I are about to reach six months, and I've never been happier. He's loving, easy to talk to, and securely attached. He knows I've been cheated on in the past, so he understands my anxiety. However, I've really struggled not to react to my triggers, and I don't want to do anything to push him away. I find myself constantly checking his Instagram following. The majority of the list are attractive gays who live in his area, some who post onlyfans related content. I've talked to him about this, and he's assured me he doesn't interact with them, and he's even unfollowed a few. Despite his reassurance, I worry that these guys may be finding his Instagram through Twitter, where gay guys like to post nudes all the time, and I think he might be interacting with them. I don't have Twitter, so I've asked him to show me his account and he doesn't post any nude content. Sometimes it feels like a smoke alarm is going off in my head, but there's no fire. He hasn't given me a single reason to not trust him. I've opened up to him about this on a few occasions, and he said he loves me too much and wouldn't think about hurting me. Plus, he's never secretive about his phone and he gave me his password. I haven't checked it, but despite all my efforts to not worry, in the back of my mind there's this thought that you can never fully trust anyone and he may find someone better. I understand that worrying won't stop him from cheating or leaving, but I have the need to get ahead of the potential pain. He's an amazing guy and I don't want to do anything to ruin this relationship. I'm tired of feeling this way, so I'm looking to get back in therapy. Any advice on managing anxiety and what has been your experiences when it comes to dating men and trust? Thanks, Ben.

[Kid Fury]

Oh, Ben.

[Crystal]

Oh, Ben. Ben. Benjamin is just.

[Kid Fury]

Has this become an Ask Uncty?

[Crystal]

Hasn't it always been. Hasn't it always been Ask Uncty?

[Kid Fury]

I guess. I guess it hasn't it dating men? I don't know. I.

[Crystal]

Bad idea off the top.

[Kid Fury]

Yeah, usually just don't do it. No, I don't know. I. I kind of. There's like a certain level of acceptance that I think you have to have when it comes to men, masculinity and sexuality and how those things are experienced and perceived. And I think the thing that has probably helped me be comfortable in situations like what you're describing, Ben, is just focusing on my own sexuality, masculinity, femininity, fun and so on. Pleasure, peace, and just kind of feeling confident and secure about it. Because let's just say dark timeline that this guy is out here, you know, with his. His chest out and his dick forward or, you know, whatever, and is just out in these streets. The streets are not closed to you. I'm not saying, like, I'm just saying. I'm not. No, I'm not saying cheap back. I'm not saying that. What I'm saying is that you are not, like, assigned to being somebody's partner. You're not assigned to anybody else's narrative or, you know, being sort of like a slave to this person's movements and experiences and what they do in tattoo. You can kind of just focus on your own shit. And it doesn't have to be niggas. It shouldn't. Shouldn't be.

[Crystal]

Right? It shouldn't.

[Kid Fury]

It should be the things you want to do with your life. The things that genuinely put a smile on your face. The things that you would be doing that have nothing to do with dating, surfing, cooking, shopping, mentoring, rock climbing, dodgeball, whatever the. Like, go live your life. These niggas ain't going nowhere, unfortunately. So, yeah, take a step back. You can't. Outside of what he's doing or what he's not doing, you have to let go of the anxiety regardless. Because, like, this nigga, if he's going to go fuck somebody, he's going to do it and you're going to find out about it. So the anxiety around it and feeling nervous and spending time checking people like, I can't listen. I will never look at a nigga's fault. Never. Because I don't care.

[Crystal]

I don't. People are always like, you don't get jealous. Believe it or not. Believe it or not. I really, really do not.

[Kid Fury]

I don't fucking care. Because with all the work that I still have to do on me, I'm having a blast living as me.

[Crystal]

Oh, amen.

[Kid Fury]

In my. The things that I've been able to accomplish just by doing what I just described and the things that I am looking to accomplish by doing the things I've described. Who XYZ nigga is fucking on is nowhere in the recipe. It's finding ingredients. You taste that? No, you don't. It's not. It's not in the book, stupid. So, yeah, I don't know. It sounds like. I don't know. I don't know. Maybe it just sounds like a bunch of cloudy foolishness or whatever, but I think you just kind of like, have to let go of it. Niggas ain't going nowhere. Like. And I'm not talking about just yours. I'm about the niggas that you are afraid he's following and looking at that are sexy. They're going to keep popping up. New fine ones, new naked ones. Only fans. No onlyfans. And that nigga is going to fall on them. He's going to double tap them because they look good. It doesn't mean that he's fucking them, but he could be. Either way. Why should that change the taste of dinner tonight? Yours. You know what I'm saying?

[Crystal]

I think so. I think I got there.

[Kid Fury]

I'm done.

[Crystal]

I think I got there. What that nigga is doing, you still need to be focused on you and what is best for you. Yes. This paranoia, this anxiety around, this man. Oh, baby, I'm glad you said you're looking For a therapist. Because obviously that was where I was going to direct you. Because anxious attachments almost always stem back to that childhood. Yes, it is. About your mom or daddy, whoever was supposed to take care of you and didn't. Yes, it is.

[Kid Fury]

Yes, it is. It's true.

[Crystal]

Children develop anxious. People develop anxious attachments because their caregivers are inconsistent. Sometimes they're there, sometimes they're not. You don't know what to trust, what to expect. So you grow up and put that on every damn body else. There's nothing your man can do to ease your mind. Because the issue isn't with trusting him. It's with trusting you. You don't trust you. You know that you're the type of person to abandon yourself in the pursuit of acceptance. Love, sex, money, whatever else. Well, being desired, being validated. You don't trust you to take care of you, regardless of what happens. So again. Wow, again, I absolutely was going to refer you to therapy anyway. You have got to learn how to build up your emotional tolerance. You. Yeah, you're going to have to learn how to handle difficult feelings. You're going to have to learn how to soothe yourself. When you start having these anxious thoughts about him. Can you interrupt those thoughts? Can you just challenge them with little questions to bring you back to reality? Like, has this man ever done anything for me to doubt him? You can start right there because you told us straight out, he's never given you a reason to not trust him. So again, this is a slow process. You can't just automatically overnight, completely change the way you're thinking. But you want to get started on it now because you said he's. He's loving, he's easy to talk to, he has a secure attachment. If he really does, if he's just this great guy, securely attached to everything else, he's not going to put up with this for too long. I'm telling you right now, especially, I was thinking, especially the more you take your anxiety out on him.

[Kid Fury]

On him, baby. And he's not giving you any reasons.

[Crystal]

He's unfollowed some of the hoes on Instagram. Yes. I mean, maybe, maybe not still show up on your. For you, the algorithm, whatever else. Like you want to see gay porn, you gonna see it? Like you said, like, there's nothing you. There's nothing you can do to keep him from cheating. And you even you acknowledge this, Ben, you seem to be very self aware. So find that therapist asap. Because at the root of this is healing. Whatever your mama or daddy or Grandma, whoever's supposed to take care of you and didn't, at the root of this is healing that. In the meantime, try to interrupt those thoughts when you realize that you're wilding out or when you know that you're being paranoid about something. You have no reason to feel that way. Try to process it without including him in it if you can. Journal, that's great. If you have trusted friends or you can say, girl, tell me, am I losing it? Something like that. Other people you can take that to.

[Kid Fury]

I do post its on the mirror in my bathroom.

[Crystal]

Oh, nice, nice. Yep.

[Kid Fury]

And sometimes I do. I'll change like my phone wallpaper to a message, like a specific message if I want so. Because obviously I look at my phone a lot and there's an app called oh, crud, I'll think of it. I'll find it in a second. But it's an app that also sends you good, like positive affirmations that sits as like a widget on your phone too.

[Crystal]

Oh yeah, I think you told. I think you said something about that on the show last week or a couple weeks ago, but yeah, that's great.

[Kid Fury]

But you, I think interrupting it, yeah.

[Crystal]

You'Re interrupting those thoughts is important just because you've probably never done that before. You probably just let them spiral until you are over there just in a ball of anxiety convinced this man is finna leave you. And he is just at Applebee's with.

[Kid Fury]

His friends just like sexy motherfuckers.

[Crystal]

Which I most people I know do like sexy motherfuckers.

[Kid Fury]

Who do you follow?

[Crystal]

I mean, I was gonna say I don't want to stereotype the gay men, but just the homies. I feel like most gay men I know are following a bunch of shirtless who are posting dick print and the only fans link in bio. So what is your. What is your self care looking like? Ben and I, everybody is like, oh, self care. But I don't want to hear that. No, it's important. Are you sleeping better? Are you sleeping, Ben? Are you drinking alcohol to excess? Are you smoking nicotine? Are you doing too much marijuana? Are you staying physically active? Are you eating candy and chips all day? Or do you sneak in a piece of chicken and a vegetable every now and then?

[Kid Fury]

What to do with me?

[Crystal]

You would be shocked at how much of your anxiety is linked to you not taking care of your damn self. Which is not always easy to do. Easier said than done. But just wanted to give you a few things you can work on while you find that therapist. Because again, Healing that shit at the root, that is going to be your. And that's not something we can do for you in a few minutes on a podcast. You're gonna have to sit down in front of that person and cry about it. But good, because, I mean, you said, you know, what have been our experiences when it comes to dating men in trust? I've only dated a handful of men, but the trust I've had. I mean, I used to have an anxious attachment. Absolutely did. Used to. But thanks to therapy, I do not do that no more. I'm far more worried about whether I like you and whether I want to keep you around than whether you want to stay with me or whether you're going to leave me far more worried about whether I'm going to stay with you. So I'm encouraging you because I know that this can be healed. You can work through this, and I don't want you to run off a good nigger who. Who is just like, listen, I'm tired of being accused when I ain't do shit.

[Kid Fury]

Yeah.

[Crystal]

So.

[Kid Fury]

And I think it'll get easier. Yeah. Again, like, as time goes on.

[Crystal]

But you gotta start. You gotta start somewhere.

[Kid Fury]

Yeah. And take it serious.

[Crystal]

Yeah.

[Kid Fury]

But it'll be fine.

[Crystal]

All right. Our last letter comes from Sarah, who says, hey, Chrislyn Kiffury. I got really into a sport a few years ago and started listening to a podcast that covers it. Last year, I reached out to one of the hosts, John, via Instagram DMs to ask for additional details on something he said.

[Kid Fury]

Sounds like a bad idea.

[Crystal]

Oh, he responded. And since then, I would occasionally message him about the sport and nothing else. John is also a broadcaster for the sport, and he offered me tickets to an upcoming event in my city, and I accepted. Earlier this year, the other host of the podcast, Luke, said something that piqued my interest, so I followed up with him via Instagram DMs. We sent messages back and forth and then exchanged numbers. Luke expressed interest in me and he seemed cool, so I reciprocated after that. Our texts were more sexual than romantic. I bet. I was in his city a few weeks ago, so we met up and hooked up. Since then, Luke has been distant and less engaged, so I assume he lost interest. And I've stopped initiating contact. He also hasn't reached out to me. Well, the event with John happened this past weekend. I met up with him after the show ended. We talked for hours and really hit it off to the point that I've developed a crush. That feeling seems to Be mutual, as John and I agreed we'd like to get together again soon. My question is, should I tell John that I hooked up with his friend and colleague in the recent past? I know things are in the very beginning stages with John, but I'm worried Luke may mention my name and tell John everything before I get the chance to tell the story. Thanks. Love you guys. Sarah, don't do this.

[Kid Fury]

Sarah, Work.

[Crystal]

This is pretty iconic. Not you, the house.

[Kid Fury]

Pretty fierce. It's pretty fair.

[Crystal]

Oh, man. A problem will never.

[Kid Fury]

If you want to do the thing that I think is probably the better idea, better for you, more mature, then I think you should. Yeah. Tell him. Expect it to go poorly and, you know, rest on the fact that you got to tell the story and. And get out the clear truth before someone else does. Because someone else will eventually.

[Crystal]

Yeah. This is not gonna stay secret.

[Kid Fury]

Now, if you want to do the max, original, scripted version of things, you just keep riding that dick, honey.

[Crystal]

All right?

[Kid Fury]

And sitting front row, sit on the grass, the floor, wherever the whatever game this is, the ice, and have a blast. And then just wait for the party to start.

[Crystal]

It won't be long. It won't take long.

[Kid Fury]

I don't believe it will take very long, but in the meantime, you can find something fierce to wear, something just. Cunt tea.

[Crystal]

Why not?

[Kid Fury]

Because what are they gonna do?

[Crystal]

Sue you for fucking friends? You're not the first person. Person to fuck all.

[Kid Fury]

Like, are you trying to keep this. Like, if you're trying to keep John, like, you really like him, want to date him, date him. Could see it being like a thing you keep around then, yeah, just tell him how things went and see, you know how it goes. And you just have to take responsibility or whatever the consequences are because you fully fucked his coat.

[Crystal]

Right.

[Kid Fury]

You know what I mean? So it just is what it is. But if you want to have like a fucking C follow up letter, I.

[Crystal]

Say you just kick that, not a follow up letter. Yeah. Yeah. I think my advice depends completely on whether you just want to say you fuck the host of this podcast or do you want to be with this man? Because I.

[Kid Fury]

Right.

[Crystal]

I'm going to be honest with you, Sarah. You do kind of sound like a groupie. You do kind of sound like a homie hopper. It. It feels like. I mean, groupies for podcast hosts sounds ridiculous, but it. Dming people about something that you heard on their podcast is not a problem. People. That happens to me all the time. What. What. What we don't then do, though, is. Okay, so you Know. You know how you know this looks messy, of course. And it. Right. So again, if you just have a. If you just want to tell the story, if you just want to say, I fuck John and Luke. Luke's stick is bigger, but John is better at fucking. Like, if. If that's all you want to do. Wait, what did you get? You know who the hosts are? You know what the show is?

[Kid Fury]

Oh, no. Like Matthew, Mark, Lucy.

[Crystal]

Oh. Oh, okay. Yeah. I don't know if she changed these names or not. I figured they're so generic.

[Kid Fury]

There's no way that's their name. I assumed right up. Up front, but I didn't put it well.

[Crystal]

I don't even remember what I was saying, baby girl. But if you have to tell John. If you. If you actually think that this could be a relationship, you're going to have to say something otherwise him real quick. And then don't call him no more. Then block him.

[Kid Fury]

You know he's gonna. Once you tell him he's going to.

[Crystal]

He's not going to. Right, Right. The chances are not good. Then he's gonna especially like, y'all might fuck, but he's not gonna pursue nothing with you knowing that you fucked his friend first. Especially because it seems like you weren't really attracted to John at first. It's like, oh, I met him and talked to him, and then I developed a crush. Whereas Luke, you were like, I'm trying to fuck immediately. So I'm not trying to feel like your backup plan either. Ew.

[Kid Fury]

Eh, yikes.

[Crystal]

Gross.

[Kid Fury]

But like, what the fuck did you possibly think? Like, if you went, you spoke to this dude first, then this one hits you, you fuck him, then you go back talking to this one and meet up with him and decide you gonna fuck with him too. It's like, you can't. I would wonder if you're okay if you're like, oh, no, I really like him and want to keep him. Like, these are two podcast who talk about sports. You jumped into their DMs, fucked on one of them when you met him, and then like, why would you want to keep either one of these? Like, all y'all are birds, which is fine. So. But it's like, you ain't gotta flock together, my nigga. You can fly your ass right back to the coop you came from and send him right back to the streets.

[Crystal]

Yeah, I would tell John just because I actually do feel like this may be. Y'all may be like, okay, Crystal, you're going too far. But I do feel like if you know, you somebody's friend, and not just a friend, but somebody he works with.

[Kid Fury]

Right.

[Crystal]

I really do feel like ethically you should say something like, I just. I feel like it's wrong to not. Is it illegal? No, but it's up. I think it's up to not say something before because give that man a chance to you knowing everything he needs to know about you.

[Kid Fury]

I agree.

[Crystal]

Let him hear that. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. She smashed Luke. I'm trying to see what that's like. Let.

[Kid Fury]

Let him make a decision because niggas will do that.

[Crystal]

Oh, absolutely. He. I mean, now he might do just like Luke. And after y'all are done, he won't call you no more. But you're the one who gets to go around telling everybody that you fucked the host of the John and Luke show. You get to do that.

[Kid Fury]

Hey, baby. Sports podcasts all over the place.

[Crystal]

They are. They're everywhere.

[Kid Fury]

Which one? Who's next?

[Crystal]

Okay. Anyway, best of luck to you though, Sarah. I think you're probably just gonna have to pick a different podcast though, if you. If you looking for a long term love, you might have to check a different show because I don't know that these niggas. I don't think you gonna have find it with this John once he learns the truth. But good luck to you babes again. Our email address is asktheread gmail.com. if you have a letter or a question for us, send it right on over there. We're going to take another quick break and be right back. One of the most important ways that we can express our individuality and our style is through our clothing choices. Over at True Religion, those good people really believe that you should own your True. It inspires you to live in confidence, unfiltered and unapologetic. From its beginning, True Religion set their own path by revolutionizing denim. They're known for their iconic, exaggerated stitch, creating genes that are instantly recognizable and making those who wear them impossible to ignore. True Religion is a symbol of individuality and confidence. It inspires you to silence the noise, carve out your own path, embrace your inner power, and take bold steps forward. That's literally, I feel like the era that I'm entering in my life right now, I am becoming more of my authentic self. And you can be the authentic you as well. And True Religion, I'm actually so, so excited because I just got the cutest and I mean the cutest denim dress. You can go find it on their website right now. It's called the Georgia super cutie belted shirt, dress. Thank you so much. True religion again, y'all be on it. Okay, you can own your true@true religion.com and use code the read for 15 off your full price purchase. That's true religion.com and code the read for 15 off.

[Kid Fury]

All right, y'all, we are back, and it's time for the read. And I want to say quickly, hopefully, I hate when I have to speak to you, Soulja Boy, because I feel like doing literally anything else with my time would be better spent sleeping, eating, running into a wall of knives. But here we are. I'm speaking to you anyway, and it's because apparently it's been reported that a former assistant of yours is suing you or has sued you for sexual assault and physical and emotional abuse. You were found liable for these, and this victim's been awarded $4 million and damages in another $250,000 and punitive damages. This is the lawsuit that was filed in 2021. I read that she began working for you as an assistant in 2018, where you agreed to pay her about $2,000 a month. Said she was never paid, but the two of you began a romantic relationship shortly after things wordly turned violent.

[Crystal]

Lord.

[Kid Fury]

And remained that way until 2020, when she left and sued you the following year. As I've said, she has been awarded compensatory damages for this lawsuit that she filed, and you've been ordered to pay.

[Crystal]

Her.

[Kid Fury]

For whatever reason you felt to speak. The need to speak up.

[Crystal]

Oh, God. Oh, God.

[Kid Fury]

Saying if y'all think I touched that, y'all crazy. It doesn't really matter what we. Okay, I'll get there. If y'all don't see they're trying to attack all of our black rich. I don't know what to tell y'all. They mad cause I own my own. They trying to take a down because I'm the first rapper to do this. They did the same with Jay Z. They did the same with pdd. They did the same with everybody. Okay? So again, I want to really make this quick because I don't want to spend that much time with you. There are so many other things that I could be doing. Eating candy, playing video games, finishing my script, working on Patreon content, jumping out of this window. Anything else? But here I am talking to you. So just real quickly, if y'all think I touched that, y'all crazy. It doesn't really matter what we think. It matters what the literal judge in the courthouse thinks, and he thinks that you owe that lady $4 million because you touched her. That's what matters here. So we could think that the sky is purple. You still have to run that lady. If y'all don't see they're trying to attack all of our black rich niggas. I don't know what to tell y'all. Now, this nation historically and perpetually attacking the black community, and specifically black community communities that have garnered large amounts of wealth over generations. That is a real issue. That it really is an issue. That's not this issue, but it is an issue. I'm not sure why you're bringing it up here. Because I ain't got nothing to do with you. They're mad because I own my own shit. I promise you, there isn't a living person in the American government that gives a fuck about the scooty bikes, the fucking. The fucking bootleg knockoff super Nintendo's that you got in the house.

[Crystal]

Oh, my God, I remember those.

[Kid Fury]

No one cares about the anime, anime graffiti. Nobody cares about the LED lights. Nobody gives a fuck about the 15 vapes and the 18 bong, bitch. Don't nobody give a fuck about none of you own or you owning it. Most of us don't remember that you have or do anything or even are until you speak. Because you're the first rapper to do what. Get on our nerves. I don't know what you're talking about. They did the same shit with Jay Z, Jay Z, and that case and this case, baby. Separate times, separate people, separate people, separate separate events, stories, evidence, everything. And people, including y'all, the y'all that you mentioned when you said people being crazy look at stuff here in that situation and went, h. Whereas this one, they did the same thing with P. Diddy. I'm not even addressing that. So what I need Soulja Boy for you to do moving forward, I need you to pay that woman.

[Crystal]

Yeah, gonna do that. Gonna do that.

[Kid Fury]

Every single United States dollar that she is owed. And then I need you to crank that silence. I need you to shut the fuck up. Up for all your living days. The problem with you niggas, you new money niggas, is you feel like you. Because you can, like, afford a hellcat and all the weed that you need that can't nobody say nothing to you. And you can go out into the world and be a wide open, destructive mess. And nobody should be able to say nothing to you. Bitch, if you feel like they did it to Jay Z and Didi and Bill Cosby and. And whoever the fuck Else, why the fuck do you think that they will not assassinate you, soldier?

[Crystal]

Oh, boy, don't nobody give a fuck about you. Say it again.

[Kid Fury]

At least motherfuckers can point to what other be like, well, yeah, that was fire. Or, yeah, there's this legendary. You talk about a dance that I did with friends when I had homeroom. I was about to say, nobody gives a fuck about what you are talking about, okay? And it's high time. It is high past time that niggas understand and realize there ain't a dollar they can excuse you being destructive. You gonna sit your ass down and you're gonna shut the fuck up. You cannot destroy. You can't do whatever the fuck you want to. You cannot abuse women. You cannot treat them and their bodies as if they're property because you have some money and you can buy somebody a car or a Apple vision pro. We're strapping you to the back of this F150 and we're hitting the gas. I don't know what to tell you. There's not a single dollar worth, like the safety of women and kids and anybody really remember how to do that dumb stupid ass dance you made up. So, dumbass.

[Crystal]

We can't still be talking about that.

[Kid Fury]

And don't forget to be quiet. Right.

[Crystal]

Cannot still be talking about crank. Dad, come on. No, it's not.

[Kid Fury]

Electric boogie woogie woogie. Bitch, shut up. Hell, Gloria could get cussed.

[Crystal]

The details of what that girl says happened to her there, it's really horrific. It is really, really bad.

[Kid Fury]

No, I. I really am not even. I didn't go into the details.

[Crystal]

I mean, it's. Yeah, no, and. And I think that's probably for the best. I just want to say for those of you who are like $4 million for what? Go look it up, baby. It's bad. It's bad. But also, what if there is anything funny about this, what it was for me was when the girl's lawyer said. Because his whole thing about when he went on this rampage about how when. If I really did all that to you, then, bitch, go call the police. Have a nigga locked up. You looking for money after being sexually assaulted? Who does that? Lock a nigga up. Lock a nigga up. Her attorney said, we did indeed try to lock your black ass up. We tried. What you left out is that there was absolutely a criminal investigation. We wanted you locked up. We gave the evidence to law enforcement. It's not up to us whether the D. A. Presses charges. That's why we went the civil Route. But we absolutely tried to put you in prison.

[Kid Fury]

So why.

[Crystal]

So when you know that. So why did you even say that, man? God damn. That's why.

[Kid Fury]

Like, you want me to believe any living thing that you say. Like I don't already know that you're stupid.

[Crystal]

This is like you thought. I thought that you were, like, a smart person who was mindful and considerate and thought things through before they didn't. You thought. I thought that about you.

[Kid Fury]

Same on you.

[Crystal]

What did you do that for? Is that it? Oh, yeah, I'm okay. Well, I just have a couple of quick things this week. First of all, Donald Trump. I know every week it's you guys Donald Trump, but I just. I'm going to talk very quickly about this clip I saw from a Chinese official. I'm not even going front. Like, I know what exactly this man's title is, but he straight up told this journalist, whoever this news lady is he's talking to, he said, china's ready. China, we're. We're doing just fine. You know, this whole tariff thing. We're not scared. The US Has a big dick, but ours is bigger, and China's simply ready. And so the journalist was like, I mean, 15% of your exports go to the U.S. that's a huge percentage, blah, blah. And he was like, yeah, but China's been around for 5,000 years. The United States has been around for, like, 250. So we've managed to thrive before you bitches, and we'll be here well after you bitches. And I was like, oh, well, when you put it that way, let me go right back on over. I, for one, welcome our new Chinese overlords. I said, oh, thank you for that gentle reminder that the US Being this world power and all this is very brand new. The US Even being a thing is very brand new. And y'all really elected Donald J. Trump to office. Y'all really said, the person we want making the decisions is that orange stupid bitch. And then once he got into office and started doing exactly what he said he was going to do, all of a sudden y'all are mad and the approval ratings dropping. Now, wait just a goddamn minute. How. How do y'all disapprove of what the man is doing when he's doing exactly what he said he was going to do? Is this not what 72 million of you bitches actually voted for anyway?

[Kid Fury]

So do you also agree that he be saying anything? And did you think that, like.

[Crystal]

Y'All was just like, oh, I. I thought it was all jokey jokes. No, what it actually was. Y'all like the hatred. Y'all like the intolerance y'all heard. Get rid of all the immigrants. You thought that was fun.

[Kid Fury]

Too many brownies.

[Crystal]

And anything else. Any details about policy you simply didn't look into? Because then you would have to read and y'all let chatgpt you would have. Y'all don't even read. Y'all don't even read. So thank you. I just want. I wanted to bring that up very quickly because it brought a lot. I mean, I laughed a lot when that Chinese man said, we are not. China's been around for 5,000 years and we look forward to the next 5,000.

[Kid Fury]

I said, oh, like, what do you think? I don't understand why you keep thinking y'all gonna pump fake like you. Them bitches are not scared of y'all. Like. And they know the like, girl, what?

[Crystal]

Oh, well, it won't be long. It won't be long. I also wanted to talk about this Keri Hilson thing real quick. Thank you.

[Kid Fury]

Oh, my God. I keep forgetting because things about her. Bitch, I wrote it down and everything.

[Crystal]

So Kerrioza was on the Breakfast Club last week, like, literally right after we recorded, literally talking about how she was. She felt forced to release Turning Me on the Beyonce diss track back in, like, 2009, she was saying, you know, Polo was just basically pressing her real hard to do this song and that the verse was mostly written by somebody else. Now, mind you, she kept the writer anonymous deliberately. She did point blank said, I'm going to protect that person because, you know, I've always protected them, but they're famous now. So, like, I'm not trying to bring them into it because, you know, dynamics and stuff back then, they may have felt pressured, whatever, too. Anyway, but she basically said, I didn't want to talk about that lady. Like, that the only parts of the verse that I wrote are the ones that are basically like, you know, telling a nigga to shut up and sit down somewhere because, like, I'm a boss bitch, because that's always what I've been about and that she wasn't really about, you know, the mess, baby. 30 minutes later, literally, the Breakfast Club watched this video now. Now, when it first came out, I said, oh, my God, who could this writer be? At first I thought maybe Victoria Monet.

[Kid Fury]

She had.

[Crystal]

She had have been, like, very young, right? So. But that was just the first thing because, honestly, I kind of forgot about Esther Dean. But so. But thankfully, the Internet Was not relying on me to make a guess because niggas was all in the comments, like, oh, bitch, it's Esther Dean. Oh, bitch, it's Esther Dean. Now what Esther Dean could have done was simply minded hers, not said anything.

[Kid Fury]

Yeah.

[Crystal]

Instead she jumped right in them comments. Somebody said the writer was definitely Esther Dean. She said and did and was and did. It was a hit. Now it was bragging. Okay, there's. There's five exclamation points here. Ann did. It was a hit. She was excited about this. Okay. She was proud to stick her name on it. Why? I don't know. Because Keri Hilson looked like she has been carrying the weight of the world for the past 15 years. Like, that lady looked miserable sitting up there talking about how this song and then like, not only being feeling like she was forced to. To do the song, you know, Polo basically saying, your album not gonna come out without this, but then them leaking it. So it wasn't even like it didn't have like a proper release or anything. And then of course, the Beehive was like, bitch, you got us up. And that was that. Esther Dean really jumped into this when she did not have to. People would have talked about it for a few days and then moved on. Because ultimately Carrie didn't really say something the rest of us haven't heard or already suspected. Instead, she told Instagram it was her, and then she posted her stories, talking about, I submitted a lot of verses for that remix. One got picked and it was co written with Carrie. Looking back, it was childish and didn't age well. I see how it hurt people, especially women. And I take full accountability. Okay? I mean, first of all, literally nobody asked you to do that. You inserted yourself here where you fully didn't need to. And I don't understand why you did that. But when she did the part about. When she said that thing about co writing with Carrie, that's when Carrie was like, okay, no, girl, I rewrote three lines in that verse. That was the only battle I won in this whole thing. The rest of this we did not sit down and write about together or nothing like that. So don't try to make it sound like we sat here and co wrote that shit. Cause we didn't. You chose to stay quiet for 16 years. But you coming out now when you felt a portion of the heat I've gotten all this time, I never ever thought that I would be the one to jump up in defense of Keri Hilson, but God damn it, she has a point. Because it had and it has been heat. Extreme and well deserved heat for coming for Beyonce saying that shit about, you need to sit down, have some babies. This was before we even knew about the miscarriages and all that.

[Kid Fury]

It was. It was heat.

[Crystal]

It was, it was. It was.

[Kid Fury]

It's been ice cold and.

[Crystal]

And cold.

[Kid Fury]

Cold's death.

[Crystal]

I know. She had. I think she has a single coming out. I think that's why she was on the Breakfast Club. Well, okay, so. See, I didn't even know that. So again, Esther, you put yourself here. I don't know why. She then wrote a whole long open letter about, you know, basically just a longer version of this. These are the lines I wrote. And I have nothing but love for Beyonce. I didn't work with her till years later. There was no plot.

[Kid Fury]

I didn't think about any one of y'all.

[Crystal]

Right? So it felt like this whole open letter was more trying to like Beyonce. I really do love you. And just because, you know, I found out about this, don't mean I can't co write nothing else.

[Kid Fury]

It's okay, right? I love Fancy.

[Crystal]

It's really. It's wild to me. Okay, so the other part of her.

[Kid Fury]

I low key feel bad for Kurt a little bit.

[Crystal]

A little bit. Because Esther said I've worked with and supported many women since. But that doesn't erase the moment. I'm sorry for my part in it. Growth is real. And so is this apology. I mean, maybe that lady really sat.

[Kid Fury]

On that for almost 20 years.

[Crystal]

Let Carrie saw Carrie's and still didn't say nothing to you, Smoke. You watched her career be blown up, like, just fully decimated. And you said, thank God my name not on that. And I'm not even. What I don't under.

[Kid Fury]

This is.

[Crystal]

Is not even. This is less of a read and more of me just being confused as fuck. Why the fuck did you put yourself in it? Because Esther Dean's pen is long. You go look her. She hasn't had that kind of success as like her own recording artist, but she's written and co written a ton of shit. It's like everything but publicly aligning yourself with this absolute mess when you didn't have to. I just don't. I'm really struggling to understand why you would do that. Do you think anybody. Like, who. If I was supposed to be working with Esther Dean, and then she said, oh, yeah, I'm actually the bitch who wrote turning me off. I would cancel whatever it was I was supposed to be doing with her.

[Kid Fury]

No shit. You know, it's funny, I was looking at.

[Crystal]

Cause you're messy as shit.

[Kid Fury]

When I saw the quote from Carrie or when I read it or whatever, I did assume I was like, oh, it must have been somebody else from the clutch. But I forgot Esther T. Was in the clutch.

[Crystal]

See, I didn't even know.

[Kid Fury]

I never thought about her at all.

[Crystal]

Yeah, I don't. If you were gonna insert yourself in the conversation and confirm the rumors, the speculation that it was you, then just stand up fully in it. All of this. Well, she wrote this line. I wrote this line. These are the exact words I wrote. No, you didn't even have to put yourself. You didn't have to insert your name into the dialogue, but you did. So now stand there and take that shit we carry. And the whole. While Polo is the real mastermind behind all this, is running around somewhere Scott free. Nobody asking him, blaming him, putting on him at all. The whole. Who actually orchestrated the whole thing is somewhere living his best life, being unbothered. Internet not dragging him. He ain't got. He don't have to turn his comments off. Probably. Probably. It's just. It's a damn shame. It's disappointing. It. I. The. I have some pity for Keri Hilson, but then I also feel bad for Beyonce because it's like, damn, you want to work with people, you know, like, you want to give other niggas a chance. You. You. You find people are genuinely talented. And you were like, yeah, let's collaborate just to find out that a bitch was. You said you wrote this shit about me. My time is up. My time is faded. I need to sit down and have some babies. And then you came here smiling in my face to write records for me. Like, that would piss me off. It actually would. I know Beyonce's a better person than I am, but I would be.

[Kid Fury]

I was about to say I would.

[Crystal]

Be assembling the witchcraft and voodoo rituals for your ass. I would. I. That would really make me mad.

[Kid Fury]

This is why you and I are not Beyonce.

[Crystal]

Yep. Yep.

[Kid Fury]

Because there is a certain type of person. I cannot do it with a certain level of spirit. I think. Who. Who can do that? Because she will probably hear about some shit like this and laugh and then, like, you know, continue eating beluga caviar with sir and Rumi or whatever.

[Crystal]

No. As for me, whereas you and I are like, oh, oh, no.

[Kid Fury]

Death.

[Crystal]

I'm immediately developing warfare, a grudge. And I'm. I'm putting. I might not do nothing to you directly, but I'm putting the intention of Bad shit to happen to you in the universe. I am. I'm wishing for that. I'm wanting that. I'm manifesting that. I want bad things to happen to you. Because how dare you write some shit like that about me knowing you did it and then come. Smile. It's opportunities. It's opportunistic. You don't want nothing but money, fame. You want the career. Like you don't have no actual morals. What do you stand on, bitch? What are your principles? All that. I know for most of y'all, all that goes out the window when a promise of a few dollars or your name in lights is. Is dangled in front of you. But I'm simply not that type of bitch. I'm not going to go sit up in your face acting like I never did nothing shady or fucked up to or about you knowing good and damn well I have. I'm simply not that type of bitch. But you got it. But you got it.

[Kid Fury]

I. I sat down, I had those. Those babies you mentioned. And I'm.

[Crystal]

And look at them.

[Kid Fury]

What are you. What are you doing?

[Crystal]

Selling you guys. It's just so interesting.

[Kid Fury]

It's very interesting.

[Crystal]

I'm pretty sure Blue Ivy has more Grammys than both of you.

[Kid Fury]

Can you imagine writing a song telling this bitch who ain't did nothing to you to go and have some babies, only for her to fast forward have babies and them be more decorated in the industry than you? Insane.

[Crystal]

It's just. Yeah, it was. I. I was gonna leave it alone entirely. I really was. And then like that night, like a few hours after we recorded all this, Estadine was online and I was like, okay, now I have to. Now I have to. Because. Why did you do that? SD.

[Kid Fury]

That'S so. I don't know why she did that either.

[Crystal]

I was young. I really wanted the career. Yeah, okay, well. Well, that's what everybody is gonna say. That's what everybody.

[Kid Fury]

Even. Even the response of it, right? And.

[Crystal]

And it was a hit. Proud. Proud. She was proud of it until she thought. Until actually started coming for her. And then it was all of this apology and getting all into it. Like Carrie said, you got 11001 of the heat since beginning, and you could not take it.

[Kid Fury]

Like, she ate that. She ate that. Because it's facts. Like, even if me, right, let's say, okay, we were young. I wrote this bullshit. I was sort of kind of being influenced by this nigga who was, you know, run off scot free. And I regret doing it. Yeah, whatever. And I never said Nothing. Whatever. She mentions it on an interview. I see her mention it on an interview, I'm likely to be like a mm, y'all. I wrote that or co wrote that. I never said anything because X, Y and Z, blah, blah, blah, blah. You're waiting for people to bring it up to you, and then your response is, and, dude.

[Crystal]

Right? It wasn't. Oh, I did this, and I feel so terrible. It's actually been eating me up for years. I felt so bad for years that I wrote those words about Beyonce because I really do love and respect. It wasn't none of that. There was no contrition. You said and did a hit. All right, well, yeah, girl. You wrote your hit, and I hope that the Internet never, ever lets you forget about that now that you done claimed your hit.

[Kid Fury]

They won't now. They won't.

[Crystal]

I know Carrie looked at that comment like, you stupid bitch. I literally tried to save you.

[Kid Fury]

She should actually really want to throw hands.

[Crystal]

She should beat your ass.

[Kid Fury]

Beyonce being mad or being annoyed, fine.

[Crystal]

Carrie also should be fine.

[Kid Fury]

But Carrie should be like, can someone get lemon pepper? Whatever. Get Natalie Nunn and M on the phone because I want to fight this bitch. What do you mean?

[Crystal]

Yeah, granted, you were 23 when you wrote those lyrics, so yeah, the young, dumb bitch. All that applies. But still, I spared you in this.

[Kid Fury]

Interview, and you still jumped into the fire anyway talking about and did and got a problem.

[Crystal]

Actually, bitch, now we do have a problem. You and Jonathan Majors meet me in between the In n Out and the local high school, and we're going to settle this once and for all. That was pretty dumb. That was not smart, baby girl.

[Kid Fury]

You might as well go ahead and change that name.

[Crystal]

Permanently. Don't change them Instagram comments to the. To people I follow. Only you going in and filter that out like. Like Jada Pinkett do so only she got 9 million likes and 3 comments on her Instagram are not allowed. That's finna be you anyway.

[Kid Fury]

And that will wrap up it Be her mama.

[Crystal]

Oh, yeah. And that's it. And her record label, her publisher will.

[Kid Fury]

And that's it work.

[Crystal]

So, yes, that is this week's episode of the Read. Find us on social media at. This is the Read again. Happy birthday, Jillian Bradley. Demetrius reached out and said, can you say happy birthday to my girlfriend? Please, please, please, please? And I said, I got you, nephew. Yeah.

[Kid Fury]

Happy birthday.

[Crystal]

Have a beautiful day, baby girl. Anything else from you, Kid Furry before we head out?

[Kid Fury]

Yes. Follow me on Patreon.com Kid Fury if you subscribe we have lots of fun things going on. We've got. Our monthly watch party is next week. So you'll be just in time for that new videos and stuff coming to you this week. I also wanted to mention something else I wanted to mention really quickly before we got off here. I know we have a surprise.

[Crystal]

We do have a surprise. We do. We do. We do. Ooh. Shout out to the people who listen to the very end of the show. Cause y'all gonna know and the other hoes not.

[Kid Fury]

Yeah, I don't remember what the other thing is. So you want to have time?

[Crystal]

Okay. Well, yes, we are very, very excited to be partnering with the good Girly Pops over at Beyonce headquarters. I don't even know, child. Yes, those beautiful diva dolls are allowing us to do a ticket giveaway for Cowboy Carter. That's. That's right. We have been allowed to give away two sets of tickets in which. Which date?

[Kid Fury]

New Jersey.

[Crystal]

May 24th. May 24th in New Jersey and July 13th in Atlanta. So to be eligible to win, all you need to do is follow the read on Instagram. That is Instagram. Instagram.com. this is the read. Follow us on over there and stay tuned. We're going to be posting some fun trivia, questions, content, etc. And then we'll pick a lucky winner to go see Cowboy Carter. Thanks to Kirby Beauty and the Read. So again, follow us on Instagram at this is the Read. And keep your eyes peeled for tickets. Again, that's May 24th in New Jersey and July 13th in Atlanta.

[Kid Fury]

So, yes, we're both very, very, very excited. And it's so wild that we have gone from being two gays who just talk about Beyonce endlessly, to going to see her shows together, to getting to meet her, and now getting to give away tickets to go see her. What is life? Speaking of, I remember the thing I forgot to say, which was, thank you so much to Glorilla. Thank you so much to her team. Thank you to Aura, everybody who invited me to her show here in LA last night. That means a lot. It really was, like, mind blowing.

[Crystal]

It's so good.

[Kid Fury]

I love you, Gloss.

[Crystal]

Thank you, Kirby Beauty, again, for sponsoring the ticket giveaway. Follow us Instagram this is the read to be eligible to win. All right, Girly Pops, take care of yourselves. We will see y'all next week.