Kid Fury (3:48)

Not surprised. Yeah, Defer. All right, so let's do our pop culture segment that I call the Hot Box. Talk about whatever I want. Heard yesterday that there was an unfortunate stabbing that took place in prison, the victim being one Tory Lanes. He was reportedly stabbed 14 times by another inmate and suffered a collapsed lung. According to a statement, he's in pain, but he's now breathing on his own and in good spirits. BET Award nominations are out. Kendrick Lamar is led with 10 nominations, including Album of the Year for GNX, Video of the year for Not Like Us, and best male hip hop artist. Dochi, Drake, Future, and Gorilla are all tied for six nominations each. Doshi's nominated for album of the year, video of the year. Drake is nominated for album of the year for sexy songs on the sometimes several. That one. As well as video of the year for family Matters. Best female pop vocalist, Best male R B and pop. Best male hip hop. Something else. Glorilla is that many. For album of the year, viewers choice, Best collaboration for Sticky with Tyler, the creator of that song. And then Futures nominee for album with Metro. So it shouldn't. Metro. Whatever. Best group. Not a group with Metro. Boomin and not a group. And best male hip hop artist. Y' all have fun with that. Let me know how it goes.

Crystal (5:55)

Yeah, I bet the show will be fun, but I don't really care who wins those awards.

Kid Fury (6:01)

Yeah, I don't.

Crystal (6:05)

Know.

Kid Fury (6:05)

The first day of Puffy's trial has taken place. I'm not really discussing the details of it. If you want to know, you can go look for it. It's not great. It's pretty awful and sad and graphic, and I think that man's going underneath the jail.

Crystal (6:26)

Mm. Yeah, I think so too.

Kid Fury (6:28)

I do. It was something to see. Three of his daughters there present. Beautiful. Leaving early, making sure to show their faces, hopefully so he sees them and knows you fucked all this up. Good luck.

Crystal (6:55)

Hmm. Yeah, I. I also caught some of the details and was immediately like, no, you can actually just keep all of this away from me. Everything we've learned up until this point has been bad. So, yeah, the things y' all are saying on the stand and the details and all that, I want to hear that even less. Go ahead and throw them away. I'm fine with y' all tossing that down the closest chute and then the incinerator. Do what it does.

Kid Fury (7:21)

You've never seen 300 when it's Gerard Butler. This is Sparta.

Crystal (7:26)

Oh, I was about to say 300. What? No, I have not.

Kid Fury (7:30)

There's a movie in 300 where Gerard Butler plays. I want to say Leonidas, like guy or general of Sparta. And this Persian man comes over and he's like, oh, yeah, like the king or whatever of Persia wants earth and water for y' all to bend the knee and be slaves and shit. Like, get over it and tell your wife to stop talking. And that man said, you got us fucked up. This is Sparta. And kicked him like. I'm talking about baddies. Like, full jetly kicked this man down a bottomless pit. And it's iconic. Sparta with a kick has become like a meme in 2004 or whenever that fucking movie came out. And that's what I thought of right now. If someone was like, okay, your sentences. Is Cassie putting on a brand new pair of Louboutins and then forcefully kicking you off of a cliff? I'm like, okay, right.

Crystal (8:39)

Can the rest of it. How much is it to stream? I would. I got $20 for that. I do. Just go right ahead and do it.

Kid Fury (8:53)

Nelly and Ashanti are getting your. That wasn't what I laughed at. Nelly and Ashanti are getting a reality show called Nelly and Ashanti we belong Together.

Crystal (9:06)

Oh, okay.

Kid Fury (9:08)

Follows the journey of the couple navigating being newlywed. Oh, I probably gotta get married. Being newlyweds and parents while juggling their careers.

Crystal (9:21)

And to call them thriving careers at that. Y' all love to lie.

Kid Fury (9:26)

The. Okay. The show's set to premiere in June, so if y' all want to watch the no Nelly and Ashanti song named after Mariah Carey record, then I'm like.

Crystal (9:40)

Do y' all even have. Do either one of y' all have a song called We Belong Together?

Kid Fury (9:44)

Do you even belong together?

Crystal (9:45)

Why that, you know, subtitle of all things. But yeah, I'm not. I'm actually not bored enough to watch Nelly and Ashanti do a reality show. I'm not. I have not been interested in neither one of y' all in about 20 years. Being completely.

Kid Fury (9:58)

Probably some of y' all that wear von Dutch hats. Still no Jersey dress scene. It's probably your tea. Good luck. Let me know. Actually, no. Lil Durk has been denied bail after being imprisoned in October for an alleged murder for hire case. He was denied this bond just last week, according to Megan Cunningham. Cun. Is that the white lady who always be.

Crystal (10:23)

Oh, yeah, that's her.

Kid Fury (10:26)

The judge denied his bond because he's been you using at least 13 other inmates phone accounts, hosting 3W phone calls, which is of course against the rules in jail.

Crystal (10:40)

Of course. Of course. You have to follow the rules.

Kid Fury (10:45)

Says here, though. However, on the bright side, the judge ruled that Dirk's lyrics cannot be used during the draw.

Crystal (10:53)

Oh, okay. I mean, there's probably enough evidence to go ahead and take care of that, but. All right, if that makes your lawyers feel better. Why on earth would you need to use 13 other people's phone accounts and. And host three way phone calls? Like, what on earth do you need to do that your attorneys couldn't do? I don't get that. Why. Why did that need to happen?

Kid Fury (11:18)

Lauren, Kiki Palmer has a new single out called My Confession. Hold on, I just need to. I have to see the COVID I need to know that this exists. Have you heard this?

Crystal (11:38)

No, this is my first time hearing about it.

Kid Fury (11:42)

Yeah, here it is.

Crystal (11:45)

What's it about?

Kid Fury (11:47)

My Confession. The cover's pretty.

Crystal (11:52)

Okay.

Kid Fury (11:54)

In the song, it says she addresses her public breakup with father for a child, Darius Jackson, as well as the viral Vegas Usher concert that started it all that we don't give a living fuck about because that shit was what, eight years ago? She says my confession is exactly what it sounds like. Me giving the voice to the feelings I buried. Sometimes the closure we need doesn't come from a conversation. It comes from being honest with ourselves. That's what this song is. My peace, my clarity, and my way of letting go.

Crystal (12:30)

Does this sample Usher?

Kid Fury (12:33)

I asked her. I haven't listened to it.

Crystal (12:35)

Right. Because I'm. I googled the lyrics and the choruses. These are my confessions. And apparently, yeah, it probably does. Yeah. Even gotta let it burn somewhere. So I feel like.

Kid Fury (12:48)

Yeah, he's good. Yeah.

Crystal (12:50)

Well, I mean, I don't. I mean, what is. What is there to say about Kiki and this man? Like, I'm. I mean, girl, I guess I'm glad you left, but you're not really clearing anything up. I guess in these lyrics you're just saying, yeah, you. We wasn't even together, I guess is the point of this song during the Usher show. They weren't even together that night. But he saw the attention she was getting from the Usher concert and decided to react online. So, I mean, okay, I guess for some people that might make a difference, but I kind of look at Keke the same way I look at Halle Bailey. Like, yeah, he's just a. Well, Halle's much younger, but the same sort of general thing. Like, here you are in a very up position with a very up man. And I'm wishing you and your baby the best, but whether y' all was together or not didn't make no difference to me. I'm just mad. This is my first time hearing about it because I haven't actually heard the song.

Kid Fury (13:54)

Yeah.

Crystal (13:54)

But also looks like it's only a minute and 44 seconds, so it's not. God, yes. Oh, okay. Well, yeah, go, go.

Kid Fury (14:03)

I like her. I like her in the music. In the music space. I actually think that she should release music more, but I don't care about this. Like, but, you know, it isn't about me. Who am I, the only consumer? It's about her and her. What did she say? Her piece and her clarity and vision. Whatever.

Crystal (14:32)

Yeah, all that is great.

Kid Fury (14:34)

Holly Bailey apparently found a restraining order against her child father. I don't know how true that is, but I hope it is.

Crystal (14:41)

Oh, no, it is. It came out last night.

Kid Fury (14:43)

Okay, good.

Crystal (14:44)

That he has put his hands on her multiple times. And, yeah, she is worried for her own safety and all this. And it's just, I mean, incredibly tragic. The way she talks about him. Acting with Halo in the car is extremely terrifying. So, yeah, like I just said with Kiki, I kind of look at y' all kind of two sides of the same coin. Both of y' all dealing with some bullshit and have kids to make your priority while you trying to deal with this nigga going online and getting all his dumbass fans riled up. In his defense, like, DDG is doing that same shit. Talking about she on vacation with Brent Fayes. I guess that's his name. All this talking about she done took your son out the country with another man. And then here go Halle being like me and my sis, you know, my aunt Chloe doing tick tocks and shit. Like, it's just me and my sister. So, yeah, she got her protective order. And I think she also got permission to take Halo to Italy with her while she films a movie. But not surprising, but, you know, just sad. I wish you would leave these girls alone. Keep your hands to your self.

Kid Fury (15:58)

They need a new taken. Not that. That's not the name of that movie. Enough. Who would star in it?

Crystal (16:10)

Not Jennifer Lopez.

Kid Fury (16:12)

No, I don't want Jennifer Lopez to be in Enough Again. I didn't want Jennifer Lopez to be in the first.

Crystal (16:17)

Oh, damn. Well, all right.

Kid Fury (16:22)

Hmm. I'm trying to think of who would be fearsome enough right now, like a black girl.

Crystal (16:34)

Maybe somebody with some sort of karate or jiu jitsu or some sort of martial arts background, since you have to. There's quite a bit of that sort of combat.

Kid Fury (16:45)

I don't know how much Jennifer had at the time. You can get training for that and you're gonna have like at least one to two stunt people anyway. So really all you need to have is rhythm and be able to follow choreography.

Crystal (17:03)

Okay, what else?

Kid Fury (17:03)

Most of them, I'd vote for, like an IO.

Crystal (17:09)

Okay.

Kid Fury (17:10)

I think that would be cunty. I could see Chloe. I could see Halle. Because the whole thing about that movie with Jennifer Wright is that she's like, oh, I'm just a woman who's just a regular girl and I don't look like I could hurt a fly and I'm being horribly abused by a monster and I have the bravery to get away when he's talking about, I took my child to Italy or out the country and he's threatening me. So I'm gonna cut my hair and learn to fight and then kill him. So I think it would be also fiercer to someone who's like unassumingly.

Crystal (17:57)

Yeah.

Kid Fury (17:58)

And then gets a bob. Cuts her into a bob.

Crystal (18:03)

Yara Shahidi. What?

Kid Fury (18:05)

There you go. There you go. She looks Marseille. Martin.

Crystal (18:11)

Yeah, the sisters. That's a good one.

Kid Fury (18:20)

What else do we have? Nothing else I care about. That's right. Yep. Said that. Yeah. I'm finished. That's it for hot tops.

Crystal (18:35)

Hey, y' all. Inspired by Judy Bloom's groundbreaking 1975 novel Forever, watch the reimagined coming of age series about young love by Mara Brak Akil, the iconic creator of Girlfriends. The epic love story follows two black teens, Keisha and Justin, as they explore romance and their identities through the awkward journey of being each other's first. Watch forever. Now playing only on Netflix. Hey, y' all. This episode of the Read is brought to you by Squarespace. We love Squarespace over here at the Read. They are the number one all in one perfect platform to get your website off and running. Okay. They give you everything you need to offer services and get paid all in one place. From consultations to events and experiences. Showcase your offerings with a customizable website designed to attract clients and grow your business. With blueprint AI, Squarespace's AI enhanced website builder, you can quickly create a personalized site that aligns with your brand and goals. Plus, Squarespace also streamlines your workflow with built in tools for appointment scheduling, email marketing, invoicing, and seamless online payments to keep your business running smoothly and ensure you're paid on time. I do love Squarespace we have been using Squarespace over here at the Read and for our own personal websites and different ventures for years and years now, maybe almost 10 years. Because it is so easy to do. It's easy to sign up, easy to get a design together, and easy to start making money and showing off what you offer through Squarespace and their incredible website design capabilities. So if you're ready to launch your site, head to squarespace.com the read to start your free trial. And when you're ready to launch, use offer code the read to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. Again, that's squarespace.com therad Let them know Kiff here and Crystal sent you. Everyone knows the best things in life come when you don't settle. That's why switching to Metro is a great choice. Because at Metro you don't just get great deals, you get even more of what you love. You shouldn't have to put up with the yada yada you find with other carriers. Things like hidden fees, contracts, underwhelming deals like girl, this is boring and I don't care. This is all a flop. Where is the newness? Where is the freshness? That's why at Metro you can get great deals on 5G devices from top brands like Samsung. With no contracts, no credit checks, no exploding bills and nada yada yada. That's wireless without the gotcha. With more 5G phones to choose from and incredible deals, you'll never feel like you're accepting less than what you deserve. Stop by your neighborhood Metro store and learn about their amazing deals. Go to metrobyt mobile.com stores to find a location near you.

Kid Fury (21:14)

Okay folks, we're back. It's time for letters.

Crystal (21:16)

Yes it is. Send your questions to asktheread gmail.com we may read them aloud on the show. Our first letter this week comes from Claudia who says, hey Crystal and Kip y I'm a 25 year old black lesbian and the youngest of three siblings. My oldest brother Tyler has always been my closest family member, especially back when my relationship with our parents was strained. While we were raised Christian, Tyler has always taken his faith more seriously than the rest of us. I no longer consider myself Christian. I came out six years ago when I started dating my now fiance. My parents have become highly supportive. Tyler initially encouraged me to focus on God instead of being gay. But I told him my happiness was my priority. Despite that, things have been great. He embraced my fiance and we all spent a lot of time together. He even offered to Let us stay with him for free while we were saving to buy our home. After we got engaged, though, I sensed a shift when I asked if he and his wife would attend the wedding. Tyler said no, that it didn't align with their values, and that he'd always known this day would come where he would have to tell me this. I was heartbroken and we haven't really spoken since. We used to talk every day and hang out at least once a week. I'm grieving the loss of a relationship that meant everything to me. He was my closest family member and I was so close with his wife and kids. My parents are frustrated that our dynamic is different and mention him every time I talk to them. Keep saying stuff like, we just need to have conversation. However, Tyler has made it very clear that he knew the impact this would have and that it doesn't matter. I'm in therapy bi weekly, but I'm also feeling really devastated right now. My fiance has been extremely supportive, but I've paused the wedding planning and am considering eloping to avoid further pain from other relatives who may be feeling the same thing as Tyler, but never has told it, but never told me. Do you have any advice for coping with the grief of losing this relationship that meant so much to me? What would you do if you were in my shoes? Thanks for reading this letter. Congrats on the interview with Ms. Tina. So happy for you both. Thanks again, Claudia. Thanks, Claudia.

Kid Fury (23:21)

Claudia, I'm the one person to ask because what I would do is probably rack up a double to triple homicide. So probably don't do that.

Crystal (23:34)

Yeah, don't do that.

Kid Fury (23:37)

I don't think you should elope either. I mean, unless eloping is a wider reaching term than I think it is, I would definitely just. Yeah, but isn't he run off and just get married, just the two of you?

Crystal (23:56)

Yeah, you don't have a whole wedding. You just kind of go someplace or you can even. Well, you can have a ceremony, but it's just the two of you. More than anything else, you don't invite all these people and make it a thing.

Kid Fury (24:07)

Yeah, I think you cater your wedding to people that support you. If that can still happen and not be painful. Because I feel the. The. I suppose it's anxiety of. Well, which of you other 75 niggas who actually did, I guess, show up secretly hate this?

Crystal (24:47)

Oh, no, the wedding hasn't happened yet.

Kid Fury (24:49)

Oh, no, I'm saying, like, the thought of that.

Crystal (24:51)

Yeah, I get it.

Kid Fury (24:53)

It sucks and it's hurtful. And although I Believe it to be anxiety doesn't mean it. It's useless or invalid. It sucks. I hate that this is someone that you. Not only your brother, but someone you felt closest to.

Crystal (25:14)

Yeah.

Kid Fury (25:15)

So it just adds a whole level of grief. And trying to work and plan and produce through that is nearly impossible. It is also going to be even tougher every time you call your mama or your daddy, and they have the typical parental lacking of shut your ass up. I don't know how else to word this. Like, girl, I think you guys should just have a conversation. Mom, father, guardian, we had a conversation, which is what led us to here. Right? We talked about this. He ain't shit now. Do you know something I don't know? Do you have a cheat code? Is he a companion? Is there something that we can program so that the next time we have a conversation he don't say something fucking stupid? You go have a conversation station with him. Since conversation. And God heals all. Matter of fact, both of y' all bitches stop talking to me now. I'm mad. You see how. I don't know how that would work, but that's me. That's. That's. Yeah, that would be me. So I feel like the. For me in my brain and my processing, the option I can think of that doesn't land anyone in jail would be you having a wedding ceremony that is meticulously curated and is somewhere not even necessarily small, but just private. And the only people who are present are you, your fiance, and your friends and people who, you know, love y' all, not people who you have to guess because that's what you deserve. I just don't think that you should go on a low because your brother's a dickhead, because I don't really believe that's what you want to do.

Crystal (27:24)

Right. Right. You weren't thinking about eloping until your brother said he wasn't gonna come. Cause, I mean. And spoke for his wife, too, so.

Kid Fury (27:33)

Right.

Crystal (27:34)

She. I mean, she probably does agree, but just saying.

Kid Fury (27:37)

I'm sure she does.

Crystal (27:39)

There's. There's a lot of people who are like, oh, yeah, I can love you. God told us to love. Love our neighbors as ourselves. But I'm not gonna go, you know, support anything that I feel goes against the Bible or against my real beliefs, which ultimately, your beliefs are yours. If you are clinging to the Bible and to God and you feel like God is telling you to not go to your sister's wedding, then that ultimately is up to you. Um, but I. I agree that I don't think eloping is what you should do here. I think you and your wife should have this wedding to celebrate the people who actually do love and support you and. And want to be there so much. Like, I think it's much more powerful to shift the focus from the 1, 2, or few who don't really fuck with y' all, and instead embrace the, you know, the other 70 who. Who really do. So, yeah, there's something else here that I wanted to. The grief. Oh, Lord.

Kid Fury (28:42)

Oh, yeah.

Crystal (28:43)

Well, okay, so. So you also. You mentioned that, you know, you want to avoid further pain from other relatives who may be feeling the same way as Tyler. I would actually encourage you to run right into the pain. I would encourage you and your fiance to send invites to everybody you want there, and if they decline for, you know, religious reasons, I would embrace that. I would. I would rather know now exactly how y' all feel about me so I can disconnect myself emotionally from you. Eloping is more like running away from the possibility that somebody else may feel like that. And that's understandable. You don't want to be hurt, but I think it's better in the long run for you to go ahead and feel that hurt, face it, take it on, have your fiance right next to you supporting you through this. There may be people on her side of the family who are also. This way, the two of you can get through it together. You have lots of other support. You know, even your parents came around. So I would. I would actually say go ahead and send out those invites. And if people are shitty about will hurt. But I. I believe in your ability to handle that. You might want to tell your therapist, though, that you're going through this. They might be like, mm, so let's go ahead and put you on weekly instead of bi weekly then. Until. Until we can. Until we can get this worked out. But, yeah, my advice for coping with the grief is to feel it. It's to feel it, not to. Not to steep in it. Don't simmer in it. You might need to set a timer, you know, an hour or so of crying in your bed, and you get up and go about your day. But feel it. Don't try to numb it with drugs, alcohol, food, shopping, sex, any other countless distractions. Feel what you're going through. Reach out to your therapist, to your. To your fiance, to the other people around you. But, yeah, if it was me, I would be like, who else? All right, so, Tyler, don't fuck with us. When it really comes down to it, who Else great, ain't he? Uncle being meemaw. Granddaddy. Who else like I. I would want to know. So best of luck to you babes, and congratulations. Good luck on the upcoming nuptials. Our next letter comes from Cadence, who says, hey, y' all. I love y' all so much, and I need to know if I'm tripping or if this situation is as messed up as it feels. I was dating this guy for about a year. Things started out great, but eventually it all spiraled. The relationship ended on bad terms, and I was hurt. He did me so wrong, y' all. Long story short, I cried to my best friend about this man. She's the one who held me when I was heartbroken and saw me trying to move on.

Kid Fury (31:27)

I.

Crystal (31:28)

This was not just a random guy. I was really in it and really hurt when it ended. Here's the thing. My best friend and this man work together. I've told her that I don't like that they have this little friendship, and she's always downplaying it, saying it's nothing. We're just co workers and we have to be cordially work. Okay, cool. I told her, I don't want to talk about him, don't bring him up, and don't interact with him around me. I'm trying to move on and respect that. One night, we were all out, Me, her, him, and a group of mutual friends. She and I were talking, trying to get on the same page about something. We weren't arguing, just a little tipsy and trying to clear something up. I even said to her, I'm not trying to go back and forth on the street. We've been drinking. Let's chill out. Out of nowhere, this man walked up and inserted himself between us. Like, literally stepped in between us and started checking on my friend, talking about, are you good? Do you need anything? I brushed that off, but it stuck with me because it just didn't feel right. Another time, we were in the car on the way to dinner. Her phone is connected to my Bluetooth, and that man called. I hung up the call, and he called again. So I hung up again and told her, I don't want you. I told you, I don't want to be involved with anything about him. I'm done. Please respect that. She said, okay. Then, not even 30 minutes later, we were sitting at the bar, and he FaceTimed her. She answered and then put the phone in my face and told him to say hi. At this point, I'm feeling played. I feel disrespected I feel like she's been lying to me and hiding things while pretending it's nothing. Like, girl, I cried to you about this man, and y' all being friends really rubs me the wrong way. So I'm asking the two of you, do y' all think I'm tripping? Would you stay friends with someone who did this? That is not even all of it. There's another story where she posted him on his birthday, talking about, happy birthday to my brother. I love you. All of this, to me, feels like a betrayal, but maybe I'm too close to see it clearly. Any advice you have is really appreciated help. And thanks, Cadence.

Kid Fury (33:25)

I mean, the boundary was set. I think it was. Is made pretty clear. Why the fuck is you putting this FaceTime in my face? Yeah, this nigga ain't even called me. And I told you I don't want to talk to the bitch. Are you okay?

Crystal (33:46)

It don't sound like. Do not.

Kid Fury (33:49)

What the fuck is wrong with you?

Crystal (33:52)

Exactly.

Kid Fury (33:53)

So you don't listen, and you don't have no respect. Okay, well, I know what to do with that. Definitely.

Crystal (34:03)

I. Well, Cadence, I'mma be real. I don't think your request is entirely reasonable. I think the part about, you know, don't talk to me about him, don't bring him up to me, you know, I don't want to be part of your FaceTime phone calls with him. All of that is quite reasonable, but there also seems to be this sort of like. Like, you don't like them talking at all, and you're trying to act like you are okay with it, but you really not, because y' all were in the car on the way to dinner. Her phone is connected to your car's Bluetooth, and he's calling, and you hit decline twice, girl. It's a. It's a bridge too far. You can let her handle her own damn phone. Now, again, 30 minutes later, y' all were. She was on FaceTime with him and put the phone in your face. She was dead wrong for that. But some of this is just. It feels a little bit like you want to control how she interacts with this man. Like her posting him on his birthday and stuff like that, and that is a little too much. If you don't want him to exist anymore, like he's dead, then you're gonna have to change the way you are interacting with these friends. Because when you said, you know, I told her, you know, y' all work together, but I don't want to hear nothing else. And she was like, cool. And then you said one night we all went out, me, her, him, and a group of mutual friends. Why? Off top, I'm confused. Why are you out with her and him? I don't even understand how that got there. So if it's that point, if it's to that level where you're just like, no. Even hearing this man's name makes me want to throw up. Then I think you need to reevaluate the way you interact with your friends. But that FaceTime shit would have pushed that. Putting him. Putting that phone in my face with him on the phone, that would have actually been enough for me to end the friendship right there. Because I've been so clear about it multiple times. It's a clear violation of the boundaries. So even though I don't think all of your asks were reasonable, I do think that she violated one that was. And so are you tripping? Yeah, maybe a little. But I wouldn't stay friends with somebody like that either. That, that the. The putting the FaceTime phone in my face is a. Is enough for me to feel betrayed. Like, yeah, there's. There's nothing else for me to try to salvage here.

Kid Fury (36:37)

Yeah.

Crystal (36:41)

But yeah. Good luck, Cadence. Hope it works out for you. Our last letter comes from Adora, who says.

Kid Fury (36:48)

Sundays.

Crystal (36:49)

I'm a 38 year old woman and I grew up in a single mom household because my parents divorced when I was four. As I was growing up, my older brother, who is my only sibling, would move in and out between our home and our dad's. Through my therapy journey, I've learned that this may have given me a subconscious narrative that people will leave me. In middle and high school, I dated boys and became sexually active at 17 as a way to feel attractive due to low self esteem. I never enjoyed sex though, and went to doctor after doctor thinking there was something wrong with me. I grew up in a small town with no masculine presenting women in my orbit. And of course, there was no representation of that in the media. When I moved to Atlanta in my 20s, my eyes opened up to the world of women. I began exclusively dating masc women around 31, and while the sex was much better, it still felt like a chore whether I was giving or receiving. I would start to tense up when I was touched in any of my erogenous zones and ended the sex right then and there. Because of this, relationships have usually ended after a few months. My therapist suggests that I may be asexual, but I don't want to break any more hearts in order to Test that theory. I have a deep desire for emotional connection and a stable relationship, but I fear that others my age will judge that. I'm not quite sure what my needs are. So my question is, how do I know if my sexual attraction is maybe due to this trauma from my parents growing up, from my parents divorce and my brother going in and out between homes? By the way, I hate that stereotype about people in the queer community, but I wonder if it may actually be true in my case and how can I explore this further without hurting more people? Thanks, Adora. Oh, sweetie.

Kid Fury (38:26)

Adora, with all love. I am not Ruth Westheimer. Like, I don't know.

Crystal (38:34)

Who is that?

Kid Fury (38:36)

That old white lady who used to talk about sex?

Crystal (38:39)

Oh, Dr. Ruth. Oh, that's her name, Westheimer. Oh, yes, right. Well, I don't even know that Dr. Ruth would have. I don't. Was she even really a psychologist or psychiatrist? Maybe, but I don't know. Well, one of the things that I learned as a client in therapy is that sometimes we don't know how or why some things come to be. It could be multiple reasons or, or catalysts behind it. And it's something that is just about impossible to try to, to drill down and identify. So I don't know that it even really matters. Like you, you bring up this, this fear of feeling abandoned and how sex with women was better, but still not great. Maybe you just need to keep going in therapy and keep working out some of the stuff you've been through, some of those complicated feelings from childhood and things like that in order to feel better about and more open with sex. Or maybe the more you're in therapy, you'll uncover something else you went through that you had pushed down or blocked out, forgotten about for whatever reason. I wouldn't, I wouldn't focus so much on like, oh my God, am I asexual? Is that because of trauma? Is that because of my parents? Is that. Was I born this way? I wouldn't worry so much about that. And I also wouldn't worry so much about like if, you know, I don't know if I'm asexual, but I don't want to date other people because I don't want to break their hearts in the. In order to test that out. I don't think this is going to sound callous, but that's what dating is for. Like.

Kid Fury (40:23)

The.

Crystal (40:24)

You. Everybody should approach dating with the understanding that it is possible, if not likely that you're going to get your heart broken like that. That's what we're doing. We're signing up to be vulnerable here. We're signing up to see is something gonna work with this person. So yeah, you know, go date anyway. I would say date anyway. Cause maybe it is, maybe it isn't. Just be honest about how you're actually feeling.

Kid Fury (40:51)

Hurt someone.

Crystal (40:52)

Yeah.

Kid Fury (40:53)

Not being super confident in bed is super low on the list, right? Really? Breaking somebody heart is blowing their mind in bed and then going to give their head, pussy, whatever the fuck. Name somebody else. Breaking their heart is like stabbing both of their twin uncles in the head. Oh, Breaking their heart is like setting their house on fire because they stayed out so far. Like dating somebody and them liking you and then you guys not having great sex or not, you know, you're not feeling the most comfortable or whatever in there. It's just like, girl, that's not something to breed anxiety about. I agree with Crystal. That's a part of dating. Try to sing out with this person. Didn't really work. Sucks, maybe sucks for you. The world continues to spin with you on it. Or you date a new person, you feel a feeling you haven't felt before. Oh, wait, I kind of want to do this thing. Oh wait, I feel a little bit more comfortable than I did. Let me talk to the therapist about this. Therapist is asking, oh, what's different about this person? Oh, well, you know, I didn't realize that this is something that they do or that I was lacking or hadn't thought of. Oh, let's explore that. You explore that for two weeks, for three weeks. Next thing you know, the, the headboard is snapped. It's snapped in half. So, yeah, piggybacking off of, of what Crystal said, I, I do think that dating is. That's a part of it. Trial error, hit miss learning, applying. But don't let the anxiety stop you from like having fun. But more than anything, learning about yourself and being comfortable with yourself because you deserve that, whether you asexual or not. If you go like, talk to your therapist or experiment more and then you really land on, oh yeah, sex ain't none for me, baby, then you can. That can be a comfortable thing and you don't have to have no anxiety or fear over dating or not dating because you know exactly what the fuck going on.

Crystal (43:10)

Yeah. And a lot of LGBTQ people have trauma because grown people, grown ass people went after them as children. A lot of them have trauma because their families rejected them at very young, very formative ages. And it scrambled their brains permanently. A lot of them were kicked out as soon as somebody even suspected they was gay. Your mama let your stepdaddy throw you out of the house because she would rather lose you than her man. Like they're.

Kid Fury (43:42)

A lot of them were forced into sexual situations with the opposite sex because they felt like that would prevent them from being gay or queer. Like, yeah.

Crystal (43:56)

Or they've had to do all kinds of stuff just to survive. And they've been traumatized through that. So there I understand you're like, oh God. That stereotype that all queer people had something fucked up happen to them.

Kid Fury (44:08)

Unfortunately, many, if not most did in that arena.

Crystal (44:13)

But it's not exclusive to lots of people are traumatized and abused as kids and are still straight. So that's why trying to. Trying to comb through the exact. And pinpoint the exact origins. It's like looking for a needle in a haystack sometimes. And you can get really wound up on that to the point where you stop focusing on what actually matters is like having an understanding of your feelings and moving forward with mindfulness. So, yeah, go ahead and date. I'm actually high key jealous of you in Atlanta because I know it's unlimited dikes down there. So just go have you.

Kid Fury (44:52)

Actually might be too many. Don't get too jealous.

Crystal (44:56)

Every time I go to the airport, I'm like, why don't I live here?

Kid Fury (45:00)

You don't even leave the gate before you see Five.

Crystal (45:04)

They right there. They all work for Delta. All five and they right there.

Kid Fury (45:09)

It's true.

Crystal (45:11)

Oh, man. But so yeah, this is a country, a world full of traumatized people, babe. The. So just good luck with you focusing on. On you and. And figuring yourself out again. As long as you're honest with people, you communicate openly. You know, it's very possible that you feel a strong connection. Y' all have sex a few times and you are not really in it, into it no more. You can just say that. Don't string people along. Don't lead them on in and out of there if that's how you feeling. To minimize hurt feelings on both sides. But yeah, good luck, Adora. That will wrap up the questions for the read this week. Again, if you have one for us, send it to asktheread gmail.com. we'll be right back. Summer on the south side of Chicago is heating up. You planning revenge? Aren't you? The shy is back. May 16th on Paramount. It's the season of the women.

Kid Fury (46:10)

Women, this is our chance.

Crystal (46:12)

It's time to get to work. But the men aren't giving up without a fight.

Kid Fury (46:15)

Trees are always gonna have a villain.

Crystal (46:17)

No one is backing down in the Showtime Original series from Emmy award winner Lena Waithe. Why do Black women always have to save the day? If we don't do it, who else will? The shy new season streaming May 16th on the Paramount with Showtime plan.

Kid Fury (46:31)

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Crystal (50:35)

Yeah.

Kid Fury (50:38)

You know, they're trying to claim that South African laws are targeting these white farmers and taking their land away from them, which again, I gotta say, folks, where are we? Is this the Simpsons? Are we on Family Guy? Is this Bob's Burgers? What are we talking about? Are we dead serious? Because at the same time, I can name places we're spending money on allowing governments to walk in and take people's property away from them. But okay, let's focus on this. The South African government obviously says no, these laws are actually for cases where land is not being used and or there's public interest in redistribution of those lands. Quite similar to many domain laws that exist in your country of the United States of America. Of course, white people are ignoring that because they just want to be wide open racist. Also, Elon Musk is from South Africa. So it's very obvious that a lot of this narrative and this behavior is just based on pre existing and predetermined racism existing there. But, you know, good luck. I'm sure everybody got a Cyber truck and $15,000 or whatever. I don't know, suck. Each and every one of y' all bitches are dumb. I doubt Elon Musk or Donald Trump could solve an equation with more than two numbers in it. And God help you if there was an X in it or a Y. No pun intended. I just think this whole entire place is vile. I think it's disgusting. I think it's run by mongrels. And it has become clearer and clearer and clearer and clearer each day that Y' all just want to make America white. I can't even say again because it never was. But good luck with that. Good luck with that. Because if all of the black and brown people collectively said, the spaceship's ready, we're out.

Crystal (53:15)

Mm.

Kid Fury (53:17)

The Hunger Games, the division, World War Z. You will all eat each other. Y' all bitches don't even like each other. Like, y' all don't even like each other if everybody black or brown and poof, poofed away. You. You broke, speckled, Caucasian bastard who can barely afford dairy that voted for and stands and celebrates and worships Trump if everybody else that that motherfucker and yourself hated disappeared. Do you know that he would spit on your ass if he saw you in public? You know they hate your broke ass, right?

Crystal (54:01)

I don't think they do.

Kid Fury (54:04)

They don't even like each other. So, okay, push the start. I'm done.

Crystal (54:18)

Him calling it a genocide that the South Africans were going through, I was like, oh, so you are capable of. Interesting. All right. Nothing about that story shocked me. I am going to talk just a little bit about the Diddy and Cassie trial, but that's just to talk about one of Diddy's attorneys, Mark Agnifolo. I almost apologized. I don't care if I fucked up your name. Because this bitch, when talking to the judge during the trial, said that the defense plans to take the position that there was mutual violence in the relationship, that they are absolutely going to admit to domestic violence. However, we need to ask the real questions, like, at what point does it become coercive? Are you suggesting that Cassie forced this nigga to hit her? I guess they talking about she's a strong person with a nature of violence, and she's capable of starting physical confrontations.

Kid Fury (55:25)

She should star in. Enough. There you go.

Crystal (55:33)

I've seen a lot of people talk about this concept of reactive abuse, which just basically means, you know, it's to describe this phenomenon when somebody who has been abused finally has had enough and lashes out. Yeah, that's. But that's just called self defense.

Kid Fury (55:51)

That's just calls that the grits and the potter.

Crystal (55:54)

Tired of you doing me wrong. To call that abuse is just so wrong to me because it is in response to this person being chronically mistreated. So, yes, we already knew that Diddy's attorneys were going to hell. But to. To literally ask the quote, we are absolutely going to admit to domestic violence, but at what point does it become coercive? End quote. I can answer that. It's actually at no point. At no point. At no point. It doesn't happen at all that this woman is begging for him to toss her around a goddamn hotel room. Hitting her, punching her, sexually assaulting her. Unreal.

Kid Fury (56:43)

Unless she was like, on top of him and her eyes began to glow. And then he said, cassie, you drool in.

Crystal (56:50)

All right.

Kid Fury (56:50)

And then she was like, oh. And then her fangs came out.

Crystal (56:54)

And then he had some and she said, want some? Yeah.

Kid Fury (56:57)

Only then I knew they was about to say some stupid shit when that other man was like, girl, good luck. I'm out.

Crystal (57:07)

That just really disgusted me.

Kid Fury (57:10)

If my other lawyer. Peace out. I was like, yeah.

Crystal (57:14)

The abused people finally reacting is called. That's what you niggas get. It's not called abuse.

Kid Fury (57:22)

It doesn't happen enough.

Crystal (57:23)

It does not. And to wrap this all up, I'm going to pass my read this week. If you didn't hear, Tory lanez was stabbed 14 times while in the clink. He had collapsed lungs. Thank God. He was stabbed seven times in his back, Praise Jesus. Four times in his torso, cuz. God is good. Twice in the back of the head. Please thank the angels for me. And once in the left side of his face, Cuz blue. I asked for that one. And yeah, ended up going right to the hospital. Had to be airlifted to a different hospital because his wounds were apparently that bad. This was great news for me. I had to very much resist the urge to post this headline on Instagram with Megan's Tyg song playing in the background because you did do her dirty. Now your life ain't shit. And I'm not wishing you the best, bitch. That is exactly what you get. However, I. I could say all that. I'm going to allow a couple of people that I saw online though, to go ahead and handle this for me. First up is Carrington from Houston, Texas. Carrington was actually featured on tmz. That's how I saw this. And I actually thought it was fake. I had to go to TMZ's page to make sure it was real. This is what Carrington had to say. Hi, it's Carrington from Houston, Texas. And I think the most important question is, is the other guy okay? I'm hoping that Tory Lanez can still dance after the stabbing, but after his 10 year sentence. I hope we as Americans do our due diligence and get illegal immigrants out of this country. But keep your head up, Tory. Hopefully you get back on your good foot. Wow.

Kid Fury (59:06)

I didn't know if that was him.

Crystal (59:09)

She told that man to get back up. Oh, ah, sorry, I thought I paused it. She told that nigga to get back up on his good foot. Is the other man okay? Correct. These are questions that need to be asked. And then finally, a TikTok from this username is Itty Girl. Iii. She had something to say.

Kid Fury (59:35)

They were stabbing, like around him, in.

Crystal (59:38)

The vicinity of him, and a fragment of the knife wounded him.

Kid Fury (59:47)

Nobody stabbed him.

Crystal (59:52)

I love social media so fucking much because for all of the narratives, and I do mean all of that bullshit that you niggas deeped into, y' all went into the absolute recesses of your anuses to pull out some of the. The justifications you had for why it was okay for Tori to shoot Meg or how Megan didn't actually get shot. Y' all just came up with all sorts of. And so in addition to this, you know, allegedly fighting for his life, they said he's fine now. And off of breathing support, which is terrible news, but, you know, yeah, like Tito's or so. I mean, like when a just stabbed you 14 times, good spirits is being alive.

Kid Fury (60:39)

So. Oh, I think.

Crystal (60:46)

I'm just really loving it. And for all the people who are like, God, that's so ugly. You really gonna act like that? That man getting stabbed do not change nothing. Do not fix nothing. Correct? Correct. And I don't give a cuz. He could have k. He could have killed Megan. He could have done anything to Megan. And to this day, y' all would probably still be talking about how Megan shouldn't have did such and such or how she had it coming or deserved it in one way or another. So why she.

Kid Fury (61:11)

Why that lady got shot? Regardless of who the fuck you think did it, why that lady got shot, you don't give a fuck he gets stabbed. I'm supposed to, oh, right, ok.

Crystal (61:22)

I'm supposed to be full of empathy and love and consideration for this bitch who played himself. Megan wasn't even going to tell on you. You're the one who did this to your self. And now I'm supposed to sit back and be the bigger person. Oh, no, I'm about to be the bigger. I'm never. Don't let me see no pictures of. Don't let me see no pictures of your wounds. Oh, my God, please don't let that find me. And I'm so serious. I'm getting disrespectful. Y' all gonna be like, damn, I thought that went to therapy. I thought that.

Kid Fury (61:56)

All. That fragment of a knife is hilarious. It was a fragment. He never Got stabbed is one of the funniest things I've ever heard.

Crystal (62:03)

TikTok is so good. It's so good. So thank you. Thank you ladies for allowing me to pass your reads. If you have a read you'd like to pass, you can email that passtheread.

Kid Fury (62:14)

Gmail.Com as well, since reminded me.

Crystal (62:18)

Oh, okay.

Kid Fury (62:19)

I like a pass a reading from one Pedro Pascal, star of the last of the star of Game of Thrones, star of the upcoming Fantastic Four.

Crystal (62:34)

Yeah, I know him.

Kid Fury (62:37)

The UK Supreme Court made it an incredibly anti trans ruling the other day.

Crystal (62:43)

Oh, Christ.

Kid Fury (62:44)

Involving quote, unquote, biological, sexual, and you know the rest. And J.K. rowling, of course, Just kidding. Decided to gloat and boast about it on. On Twitter, I think. Oh my God, get a job comes together. And Pedro Pascal responded to this by calling her a heinous loser.

Crystal (63:19)

Keep going, keep singing.

Kid Fury (63:25)

Someone posted this. Someone by the name of Tariq Raoul. I'm so sorry if I butchered my. Your name, but Pedro responded to this in a comment and said awful about just kidding. Awful. Disgusting. Shit is exactly right. Heinous loser behavior with loser in all caps. And then I think he went to the premiere of Thunderbolts. The Marvel. The new Marvel movies.

Crystal (64:00)

Oh, yeah.

Kid Fury (64:00)

Wearing a T shirt that says Protect the dolls.

Crystal (64:03)

That's where that came from.

Kid Fury (64:05)

Yes.

Crystal (64:06)

Oh, I love him.

Kid Fury (64:10)

He called that bitch a heinous loser.

Crystal (64:14)

And that's exactly what she is.

Kid Fury (64:15)

And that's exactly what she's.

Crystal (64:17)

Billions of dollars. And this is how you spend your time. Maybe you need a job. Maybe you need a job. Like indeed.com bitch. Like hobbies, they, they're. They're everywhere. Like, you have all the money. You could do anything. You could go around buying castles and renovating them and putting them on Airbnb. And this is what you choose to do with yourself.

Kid Fury (64:38)

Furthermore, you don't care about women's rights as according to what you're saying or in accordance to what you're saying, as much as you do making money. Because you made money off that Hogwarts Legacy video game. They made the owner of the tavern or bar, I can't remember the name of it, over in Hogsmeade. The owner of it was a trans woman. The man playing Severus Snape in your upcoming TV show openly bashed that UK ruling and has been supportive of trans rights. People left, right and center who've been using the rights that you signed off of for your property that you still make money off of, have not only included trans Women in the stories have spoke out against the shit that you talking about. You talking about some. Oh, well, I don't have the pop. I don't have the power to ask a cast member. And I wouldn't even if I did. Yeah, you wouldn't even if you did, bitch. Because you know you getting paid off of this thing, whether trans people are in it or not, whether the people producing it, acting in it, cooking for it, designing for it, or whatever, all of them bitches could disagree with you. And you won't give a fuck. All of them motherfuckers could vote against. You won't give a fuck. Why? Because you get paid. So do you give a fuck about what you're talking about? Do you give a fuck about women's rights?

Crystal (65:56)

No.

Kid Fury (65:56)

Or do you give a fuck about the still get. You give a fuck about capitalism? You're a fake ass, fraud, ass, heinous loser. Good night. And. And Fantastic Four. Joel Miller, that one from Game of Thrones said it bunk, you're a loser. You're a bum.

Crystal (66:13)

A heinous loser. I don't know how you come back from that. Especially from somebody who. Pedro Pascal has the image of like a warm cinnamon roll. Everybody knows this. He's just like a. He's a sweetheart. He called you a heinous, despicable, dumbass of a loser. I would log off.

Kid Fury (66:38)

Protect the Dolls work.

Crystal (66:40)

I do love that. And, yeah, protect the dolls and go see Thunderbolts. That was a cute movie.

Kid Fury (66:44)

It really was.

Crystal (66:46)

Okay, that will wrap up this week's episode of the Read. Find us on social media at this is the Read, our website. This is three.com again. Follow us. Make sure you're following us on Instagram. In particular, we will be giving away tickets to Cowboy Carter in Atlanta here very soon. Any other announcements from you before we head out?

Kid Fury (67:09)

No, nothing for me. Walk your dogs. Spay and neuter them. And cut your children's hair or whatever.

Crystal (67:18)

All right, y' all take care of yourselves. We will. See y' all next week. Summer on the south side of Chicago is heating up.

Kid Fury (67:27)

You planning revenge? Aren't you?

Crystal (67:29)

The shy is back. May 16th on Paramount. It's a season of the women.

Kid Fury (67:35)

Women, this is our chance.

Crystal (67:36)

It's time to get to work. But the men aren't giving up without a fight.

Kid Fury (67:40)

Street's always gonna have a villain.

Crystal (67:41)

No one is backing down in the Showtime original series from Emmy award winner Lena Waithe.

Kid Fury (67:46)

Why?

Crystal (67:46)

Why do black women always have to save the day? If we don't do it, who else will the shy new season streaming May 16th on the Paramount with Showtime plan.