Pardon: A Book by Boosie

Summary

The Read – Episode Summary

Episode Title: "Pardon: A Book by Boosie"
Release Date: July 16, 2026
Hosts: Kid Fury & Crissle
Network: Loud Speakers Network

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Overview

This episode of The Read is quintessential shade and laughs as Kid Fury and Crissle tackle hip-hop and pop culture's wildest stories—from viral WNBA drama and alleged legal scammery to listener advice and righteous rants. The episode’s heartbeat is twofold: first, a hilarious, in-depth unpacking of Boosie’s lawsuit over his failed Trump pardon, and second, lively commentary on Beyoncé rumors, the cult of Caitlin Clark, and the everyday struggles of Black queer life. As always, the hosts blend razor wit, exasperated wisdom, and Black excellence in a vibe-rich, therapy-meets-gathering-of-shady-cousins atmosphere.

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Black Excellence, Beyoncé, and Blue Ivy (01:45–12:47)

Troy Mullins, Black Golfing Excellence (02:21–04:43)

• Crissle honors LA’s Troy Mullins, the first Black woman to win the World Long Drive Championship in 2017 and break the record for the longest drive at 402 yards.
• Mullins' flair: also speaks Mandarin, Spanish, and ASL ("You’ll never be her. Keep dreaming.")
• The shade: “Golf, overall, you think horrible white men. Shout out to this sickening Black woman for entering the chat.” (Crissle, 04:37)

Beyoncé Hive Watch: Signs and Speculation (04:43–12:47)

• Kid Fury confesses he’s almost “back in with the Lulu Hive” after last week’s skepticism, citing Beyoncé’s concert appearances, Blue Ivy’s prodigy status ("Look at the little prodigy. Look at the baby girl, man...She is just so beautiful." —Kid Fury, 05:25).
• The never-ending breadcrumb hunt for new Beyoncé music—font choices, outfit choices, anniversary rumors—"Why did she use the same font she’s been using since ‘Renaissance’?" (Crissle, 07:47)
• Commentary on Blue Ivy upstaging her parents ("She was just telling Beyoncé to pipe down and it’s not that serious. And open the fruit snacks while you at it." —Crissle, 06:02).
• Both hosts urge the Hive to chill: “Each performance doesn’t have to be a sign of an album.” (Crissle, 09:29)
• Reflection on Beyoncé’s strong presence at Jay Z’s shows and Blue Ivy’s iconic stage moment.

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Pop Culture Potpourri (12:52–28:03)

Jay Z’s Yankee Stadium Residency: Guest Stars Galore (12:52–15:43)

• Rihanna, Nas, and Teyana Taylor cameo. Rih described as “out on the town” and “having a good time.”
• Teyana’s vocal criticism attributed to technical issues: “Teyana Taylor...that was her mic, not her voice.” (Crissle, 14:13)
• Jeezy skips his own Vegas show for Jay Z, to the hosts’ mock outrage: "I'd be incensed—flames on the sides of my face." (Crissle, 15:24)

Taco Bell, Cyclospora, and Diarrhea Dilemmas (16:33–19:15)

• National cyclospora outbreak and Taco Bell’s role: "How is anyone telling the difference between parasite diarrhea and the Taco Bell diarrhea?" (Crissle, 17:24)
• Kid Fury’s rant: “Don’t have me choosing between the U.S. government and ‘yo quiero Taco Bell’ because I will.” (Kid Fury, 18:29)

Boosie, Pardons, and Lawsuits Sneak Peek (19:15–20:04)

• Teaser for Kid Fury’s “read” segment: “You get things that make life worth living...This is one of them.” (Crissle, 19:22)

Nicki Minaj Sued by Her Own Lawyers (20:04–22:30)

• Nicki’s legal team sues for $300k unpaid bills. Satire on her Trump/MAGA associations.
• “Did you ever pay these niggas like, anything beyond the retainer? This is insane.” (Kid Fury, 21:44)

Pooh Shiesty’s Dad and House Arrest Antics (22:30–27:50)

• Pooh Shiesty’s father tries to loosen house arrest to maintain real estate business—prompt denials from judge and prosecutors, with hosts lampooning the situation.
• Kid Fury: “Are you laying the tiles? No? Thank you so much.”

Tyler Perry Lawsuit, Sexuality, and Outing Culture (28:26–34:00)

• Tyler Perry refuses a deposition over questions about his sexuality in a sexual assault suit.
• Thoughtful, irreverently honest commentary: “Does Tyler Perry think that answering questions about his sexuality would somehow harm his reputation?... Do you think everybody doesn’t already think you gay?” (Kid Fury, 30:53)

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Listener Letters: Advice & Gags (36:34–61:44)

Odyssey Movie Backlash / Bigoted Critics (36:34–39:56)

• Audience question about the Zendaya-starring “Odyssey” and its three-hour runtime.
• Discussion of backlash against casting Lupita Nyong’o as Helen of Troy: “Lupita is supposed to be the most beautiful woman in the world? [People losing it].” (Kid Fury, 39:23)

Obsession & Backrooms Movie Recs (40:03–43:12)

• Crissle praises psychological thriller “Obsession” for its nuanced take on consent and misogyny.

Roommate, Stepdad, and the Raccoon Question (44:57–51:13)

• Listener frustrated with her mom’s husband being unsupportive late at night, risking run-ins with raccoons.
• Advice: “Carry a keychain flashlight, get through the next three weeks, and then move out and never look back.” (Kid Fury, 48:23)
• "Sounds like you just hate this nigga." (Crissle, 49:52)

WLW Flirting & Jobless BFs (52:31–61:44)

• Young bi woman (Ray) is tempted by two office studs, but has a struggling boyfriend.
• Advice: "If all he’s asking is for you to wait for him to grow up, that’s the bigger problem than the job." (Kid Fury, 57:11)
• On queer flirtation: "Do queer women, do y'all have to be hit with bats? She's flirting!" (Kid Fury, 58:01)
• Practical reminder: "Don’t date anybody at work. You live in Atlanta. Toss a pebble, you’ll strike a stud." (Crissle, 61:00)

Hardest Video Game Bosses (61:44–65:12)

• Kid Fury and Crissle bond via gaming trauma: “Fucking Thunderblight Ganon was the biggest piece of bullshit in that game.” (Kid Fury, 62:57)

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The “Read” Segment: Boosie's Big Scam and Government Absurdity (70:24–93:19)

Boosie, Trump Pardons, and Scammer Hijinks (70:24–82:52)

• Kid Fury gives a blow-by-blow of Boosie Badass’ lawsuit after being scammed out of $600,000 by two right-wing lobbyists who promised him a Trump pardon that never came.
• Boosie’s public meltdown on Twitter, endless receipts, and legal nonsense.
• Quote: “Jack! Shut your lying ass up...You played with the wrong one.” (Boosie via Kid Fury, 72:32)
• “Who else would put themselves in this situation but Boosie?” (Kid Fury, 79:42)
• "You gotta know when to hold them and when to fucking fold them.” (Kid Fury, 77:45)

Congressional Nonsense: Protecting Caitlin Clark (84:25–93:19)

• Kid Fury rips into Congress’ performative concern with WNBA rookie Caitlin Clark, who’s being “protected” by MAGA lawmakers, while Black players are harassed.
• Quote: “We got doo doo all over the salads. Nobody can eat fresh fruit and you’re sending letters about Caitlin Clark?!” (Kid Fury, 92:39)
• Parallels drawn to Taylor Swift and the “weaponization” of white womanhood.

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The Personal “Read”: Dog Drama (93:19–99:46)

Crissle vs. Link (the dog)

• Rant about Link sneaking turkey stick wrappers from the trash, chaos in the bedroom, and the futility of disciplining a cute dog after the fact.
• “You had to pull all of the trash out...to get a wrapper? You’re insane, bitch!” (Crissle, 94:51)
• Classic pet parent pain with a comedic, exasperated twist.

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Notable Quotes & Timestamps

• Kid Fury (about Beyoncé rumors, 07:47): “I don’t want to get caught up in the what-ifs and the maybes...looking for signs in every goddamn thing.”
• Crissle (on Boosie’s lawsuit, 75:54): “This looks like Chat GPT maybe came up with this contract.”
• Kid Fury (on Caitlin Clark, 84:25): “Caitlin Clark is transforming women’s sports...and you and all those Black dyke bitches on that court are so mean to her.”
• Crissle (WNBA, 92:29): “Racists are so boring.”
• Kid Fury (raccoon advice, 48:23): "Carry a keychain flashlight...there’s no reason to inconvenience yourself over your mama’s husband. Count the days and then cut him out of your life."
• Crissle (on queer women flirting, 58:01): "Do queer women...have to be hit with bats?"
• Kid Fury (video game trauma, 62:57): “Fucking Thunderblight Ganon was the single biggest piece of bullshit in that game.”
• Crissle (dog mischief, 94:51): “You had to pull all of the trash out and spread it across the bedroom floor to get a turkey stick wrapper? Are you insane, bitch?!”

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Important Segment Timestamps

• Black Excellence / Beyoncé Review: 01:45–12:47
• Jay Z Residency / Taco Bell Outbreak: 12:52–19:15
• Legal News (Boosie, Nicki Minaj, Pooh Shiesty, Tyler Perry): 19:15–34:00
• Listener Letters (Life, Love, Lesbian Flirting, Video Games): 36:34–65:12
• Main 'Read': Boosie Pardon Fiasco & Caitlin Clark WNBA Drama: 70:24–93:19
• Crissle’s Dog Read: 93:19–99:46

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Summary Tone

Playful, irreverent, deeply Black, and unfiltered. The hosts toggle between caustic wit (“don’t know a harder boss than Thunderblight Ganon”) and incisive social commentary (“Paige Bueckers is right there, but she’s gay and gives Black women their pride”). The episode is cathartic, sharp, and peppered with pop culture references, making it feel like you’re sitting across from your funniest, realest friends.

Transcript

[Crissle West]

The best dancers from across the globe

[Kid Fury]

are about to join me for the

[Crissle West]

audition of a lifetime.

[Kid Fury]

ABC Mondays. Do they have what it takes to compete and be the next Dancing with the Stars pro? I'm here to win.

[Crissle West]

Nothing is gonna stop me.

[Kid Fury]

Our star judges will decide. This is what hunger looks like. It was 100% the wrong choice. Robert Irwin hosts The next era of

[Crissle West]

ballroom starts right here on Dancing with the Stars. The next Pro.

[Kid Fury]

All new Mondays, 8, 7 Central on ABC. Next day on Hulu Read is brought to you by Planned Parenthood Federation of America. Here's a news flash, y'. All lawmakers are not medical doctors, which is exactly why they should stay out of our health care decisions. But the Trump administration and Congress passed a law to defund Planned Parenthood, blocking patients with low incomes from wellness exams, cancer screenings and essential services. Even worse, some lawmakers want to make the defunding permanent. Planned Parenthood is not backing down, but they need your help. They donate today@planned parenthood.org defend because reproductive rights are human rights.

[Crissle West]

Well, hello.

[Kid Fury]

Hello.

[Crissle West]

Slurs. Welcome back or welcome for the first time. My name is Bobsqueez Pansak.

[Kid Fury]

And I am Shanteri Young. And this is the Read. Thank you for joining us.

[Crissle West]

It is the Read Lord Bob squeeze and we say thank you.

[Kid Fury]

I'll never get over it.

[Crissle West]

This week in the July mid July, we come to you with high heads and hearts as black American divas. Holding up the light. Okay. And saving the world from darkness. Holding up the light. Won't you please, America? Is that how the last part?

[Kid Fury]

I don't have no idea.

[Crissle West]

Hold up the light. Say the world from nothing. Yeah. That's how it goes. We're going to start that with black excellence as we usually do. This week, black excellence is going to an amazing LA native, an iconic woman by the name of Troy Mullins. Troy Mullins is a professional golfer. And this story actually happened many years ago, like eight years ago. But I'm just hearing about it for the first time now. She won the world long drive championship in 2017. And it sounds like, I guess the finals for golf.

[Kid Fury]

Okay.

[Crissle West]

Like the Super Bowl, I guess. Got it. So first African American woman to win. And also broke the women's world record for longest drive, 402 yards, which sounds very far, very long. As someone who doesn't know much about math and she graduated from Cornell. She also apparently ran track and field there. So the diva was just prepped and ready because I watched an interview with her where she that she didn't play Golf. In college, she barely knew anything about golf and just, I guess, hit the green and shut all y' all down. So again, it's almost like we're them. You know what I mean?

[Kid Fury]

Yeah, yeah, it does sound that way. She just woke up one day, was like, yeah, I'll hit the little ball. What could happen?

[Crissle West]

Why not? She also speaks Mandarin, American Sign Language, and Spanish, so it sounds like you'll never be. Keep dreaming. Troy Mullins, the one and only golfing diva. And another part of the reason why I live for this is because Golf Maga, like, overall, you think horrible white man, so shout out to sickening black woman.

[Kid Fury]

Right?

[Crissle West]

The opposite of that for entering the chat. We love to fucking see it.

[Kid Fury]

Love that for her.

[Crissle West]

Anyone black and excellence you've heard about this week, Personal or professional?

[Kid Fury]

Well, I'm back in with the Lulu Hive child. It's probably part of the topics, but that Creole witch.

[Crissle West]

Told you. I told you, bitch. You dragged me last week. Bring it back. Bring it back on in.

[Kid Fury]

I said, God damn it. I don't want to get caught up with y'. All. I swear I don't. But what is she doing? Everything. I mean, you know, Blue playing the piano, Iconic, and that was so fierce. Other people were there as well, but that Creole woman, Beyonce.

[Crissle West]

Can we talk about Blue?

[Kid Fury]

Oh, yeah, we have to. We have to. We have to. Look at the little. Look at the prodigy. Look at the baby girl, man. She is really just everything you would picture Beyonce and Jay Z's eldest child to be. She is just so beautiful. And so I said, lord, Beyonce looking like Tina. Blue looking like Beyonce. What is happening? Jesus, I'm getting old. I'm getting old.

[Crissle West]

But, oh, yeah, she was just telling her parents to shut the hell up. At Ernie's yesterday.

[Kid Fury]

She was just telling Beyonce to pipe down and it's not that serious. And open the fruit snacks while you at it. Like.

[Crissle West]

Yeah, what happened? It was taking so long. The fact that her father says she plays by ear.

[Kid Fury]

Yeah, yeah. And. And won't take lessons. I was like, please don't. Don't make it a thing. Okay. Yes, I'm a prodigy. I'm so good. Don't make it a thing.

[Crissle West]

God, calm down. I'm her. What did you expect?

[Kid Fury]

Oh, niece. She's really gross.

[Crissle West]

But yes. What is that lady doing?

[Kid Fury]

I don't know. I don't know. And I said, God damn it, the Lulu. I was gonna be on my ass because I. I've been trying to just, you know, I don't want to get Caught up. Because the signs are there, okay, for all y' all talking about. Tour body is back. The knee is fully healed. She's back in a real heel. You know, the. The block pump, church pump is gone. The stilettos are back. Fine. And, you know, fine. Y' all can have all that. However, the signs are there. For her to not be on tour at all this year. It's. Yeah, it's just there. Like, I think.

[Crissle West]

I think those signs are bigger, right?

[Kid Fury]

I mean, her husband is going to Europe, I think the rest of the summer, and then in September, too. So if anything, she's just gonna be performing at his shows.

[Crissle West]

But I can see that when, you

[Kid Fury]

know, the 20th anniversary, I think of B Day is coming up in September, so maybe we'll get something around. I don't want to. No, I don't want to be this person. God damn it.

[Crissle West]

She might just release another song or she might re. Record a song on B Day.

[Kid Fury]

Yeah. Or she'll put shit on.

[Crissle West]

I might be right.

[Kid Fury]

This is. Well, see, and I don't want to get caught up in the what ifs and the maybes and the looking for signs in every goddamn thing. I really don't want to be that person.

[Crissle West]

Why did she use the same font she has been using on her singles since Rex? I'm sorry. Like, this lady is playing games.

[Kid Fury]

She is. She's really. She's fucking with us. Like, girl, how you got backup dances at your husband's show? Like, you can't. Beyonce, what are you doing? What's happening, bitch? The fact that that show still went on at, like, 12:15am that third show that got started so late because security was terrible at Yankee Stadium, and n. Just bum rushed the gates and went in when they felt, like, insane. Insane. So anyway. Anyway, Beyonce, I. I really. I'm trying to hold back, but she looked incredible. Incredible. And we. You know, we need it.

[Crissle West]

Did you see. Did you see the theory of the, like, capris like, she was wearing? And it'd be like, this is absolutely giving. Tina. It's ra.

[Kid Fury]

Yeah. Okay. They said, okay. Pedal pictures.

[Crissle West]

That's what love that. I felt like that was a reach.

[Kid Fury]

Yes, it is.

[Crissle West]

But I think we're all reaching.

[Kid Fury]

Yes. I mean, because look at her. Like, she just. That lady is so fucking good at what she does that all she has to do is take her ass on that stage with a mic, and immediately millions of people worldwide are just, like, acting like they've never eaten before, never had water, don't know where their next breath of Air is coming from. We're just.

[Crissle West]

Oh, Beyonce, she is a performing artist. She is. So each performance doesn't have to be a sign of an album. Sometimes that lady is gonna perform because that's what she does for a living.

[Kid Fury]

Right, Right.

[Crissle West]

And it does have to mean anything.

[Kid Fury]

Yes. And that's why I want the hive to calm down. I want us to chill. Because, like, this is her husband of, however, billions of years, and they have a family and a life. They're clearly. They've clearly been through some shit together, and they seem to be very locked in. So, like, why wouldn't she be a part of it?

[Crissle West]

An album together, countless records together.

[Kid Fury]

Right. They have. Right. Some of his biggest hits. Beyonce is on them. And she has quite obviously had a big influence and impact over his performance style. And, you know, the way the show is set up and the. The mixes and all of that, like, obviously, that's his fucking wife. So, like, of course she's on stage. Like, it's just not, you know, it's not on the Run three or whatever, so.

[Crissle West]

Right.

[Kid Fury]

But.

[Crissle West]

Oh, I said it would have been odd if she didn't perform.

[Kid Fury]

It would have. But also, I think understandable if it was supposed to be like, you know, as soon as I show up. Right. As soon as I show up, all of a sudden it's Beyonce's husband. So I could see it if she didn't. But I think it made total sense that she did. And what. I was just. I was just happy they let Blue come on stage for.

[Crissle West]

You know, I thought that was fierce. A couple of that. Yeah, that got me.

[Kid Fury]

Yeah.

[Crissle West]

I was like, look at this young woman eating this thing up like it's nothing. A classic.

[Kid Fury]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Crissle West]

Classic.

[Kid Fury]

Truly. Indeed. And I saw a bunch of posts about. I know Rumi is backstage fuming, where the fuck is Ruby Carter? And why did y' all not let her go out there with her sister? Blue got to go on stage. Mommy got to go on stage. Even daddy, he never goes on stage. And y' all didn't let roomie out. I know roomie had a fit. I know somebody heard it that night.

[Crissle West]

Roomy is like, I could have sat on the piano, but I don't understand what the problem is.

[Kid Fury]

I still have my cowboy hat and all of my things for mommy show. I definitely could have went out there and did my little part like, y' all. Wallet. Anyway, love, I. I've just been. I can't stop thinking really good. I cannot stop thinking about Beyonce. I just can't. I can't listen, that Yankees outfit she wore on the Sunday, I guess it was technically Monday show. My God. Oh, my God. God.

[Crissle West]

It looked like the Houston one she wore on Cowboy on the Cowboy Carter tour.

[Kid Fury]

Yeah. Just with, you know, the Yankees and then the blue shorts. I know one of the Yankees colors is blue, but I always think anything blue is about, you know, their child, so.

[Crissle West]

Child, yes.

[Kid Fury]

So I'm. I'm fully. Well, I'm not fully locked in with Dulu High, but I'm on my way, man. I can feel it. I can fucking feel it. Something.

[Crissle West]

It feels like there's something in the air. Just a little something.

[Kid Fury]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Crissle West]

So there were a few other guests at the. At the Jay Z Yankee Stadium residency that had people talking. Nas came out, Rihanna came out. That was a huge deal because that lady hasn't touched the stage since I was in high school.

[Kid Fury]

Rihanna. Shout out. Shout out to Rihanna. I. I said, sis is out on the town. She got three kids under like four and she clearly done had a couple drinks backstage. And my bitch is just up there having a good time. Okay. Vibes. Okay.

[Crissle West]

Yeah.

[Kid Fury]

I came to have fun and I hope y' all are enjoying it. She said, oh, I miss this shit. No, you don't. You not finna do it. Don't even say that.

[Crissle West]

You really don't.

[Kid Fury]

You not finna do it.

[Crissle West]

Girl. Now you are playing the trick.

[Kid Fury]

Right? Right. So you know the Navy, they the ones that are really starving. Cause that bitch has been playing with them.

[Crissle West]

I hate that. Yeah, I hate that for them.

[Kid Fury]

But she, you know, she looked like she was having a good time on stage.

[Crissle West]

Teyana Taylor also came out to perform Can't Knock the Hustle and got some interesting commentary from online people talking about her vocals. What? I watched it sounded like there was something wrong with her microphone.

[Kid Fury]

Yeah, I thought so too.

[Crissle West]

Or audio, you know, So I don't understand this reaction. I mean, I think we've heard Teyana Taylor sing at this point live wise. So.

[Kid Fury]

And she has a pleasant voice. I mean, no shade. Cause adore Rihanna, but she's never gotten up there and given nobody. Nobody's, you know, operatic vocals or nothing of the sort. So I too assumed it was an audio mic sound, etc. You know, it's. It's 2:00am we not even supposed to be out here type shit. Like, I figured it was something like that.

[Crissle West]

Yeah, Jeezy.

[Kid Fury]

Jeezy canceled his own show to be there.

[Crissle West]

Oh, I forgot about that. That's kind.

[Kid Fury]

No, it's not. What

[Crissle West]

I mean, not if you went. If you planned on going. Yeah. From the outside, looking in fierce.

[Kid Fury]

You know how mad I would be if I was in Vegas with my friends for the weekend and we like, oh, yeah, we can see the Jeezy

[Crissle West]

livid, fuming, incensed flames on the sides of my face.

[Kid Fury]

I would still be cussing that nigga out. What do you mean you canceled my life.

[Crissle West]

It would at least be at least a year of dragging this. Are you okay, Jeezy, you know, don't play about Jeezy.

[Kid Fury]

He would be so mad. You cannot. Jeezy said, it's Jay Z though, y'. All. You have to understand.

[Crissle West]

Hey, that. That is good. That is so good.

[Kid Fury]

I know them, the whoever you know, works at the venue where he canceled. I know. They was like, there's no way. There's no way.

[Crissle West]

Yeah.

[Kid Fury]

That you're about to force us to. To reschedule this push. You know, this money is going into new dates. Surely some people are going to get their tickets refunded because they can't make like, you're. There's no way you're going to pay money to go to the Jay Z concert. And he said, that's actually. I'm already on the jet, actually, so just send the invoice. I couldn't believe it.

[Crissle West]

Work.

[Kid Fury]

Ghetto. Ghetto.

[Crissle West]

Moving right along. There's something called a cyclospora outbreak plaguing the United States right now. It's a parasitic outbreak that is causing, quote, explosive diarrhea in well over 4,000 cases at this point. The fast food chain Taco Bell is apparently under spotlight for this. They're facing heavy scrutiny over the produce served within the establishment and, you know, produce served at many restaurants right now. And so my main question is, how is anyone telling the difference between the parasite diarrhea and the Taco Bell diarrhea? Like, how do we know it's the cycling spinin?

[Kid Fury]

That's a good question. I don't actually know the answer to that. I think the cyclospora takes a while to develop. Like, you can eat the bag groceries and it takes like a few days or even a couple of weeks to kick in. Whereas Taco Bell, you're probably going to get the runs within six to eight hours, but other than that.

[Crissle West]

Good point.

[Kid Fury]

Not sure. It's very crazy that you cannot have fresh fruits and vegetables in the middle of July, which is fresh fruits and vegetable season.

[Crissle West]

Like, it's almost like there's something wrong.

[Kid Fury]

It's almost like maybe we should have kept up the government Agencies that tracked shit like this. And maybe we should have maintained health and safety, food standards and protocols. And we should be allowing these people to have bathroom breaks and access to running water and soap. And it's almost like these things were rules for a reason. Ik you guys. Hmm.

[Crissle West]

And y' all want to blame Taco Bell, the diarrhea headquarters of the United States of America?

[Kid Fury]

Okay, I don't think so. Now, don't have me choosing between the United States government and yo quero Taco Bell, because I will if I have to align myself with the good. Listen, them people who gave me the gordita crunch and the Dorito. Los Tacos, bitch.

[Crissle West]

My two girls. Those were literally the two I was about to make. Please understand, if I have to make

[Kid Fury]

a decision right, it's not going to be the guv.

[Crissle West]

Give me that gordita and a hot Baja Blast.

[Kid Fury]

I want a Baja Blast, bitch. Yes. In the big cup. Sure do. Right?

[Crissle West]

Speaking of White House fuckery, one boosie of the badass house.

[Kid Fury]

Oh, this is my read.

[Crissle West]

Oh, fierce. Well, we'll save it because this is. You know, sometimes you get things that make life worth living. Sometimes you get a notification. Maybe you get some sort of an alert, and it gives you a story that might make, like, balance out the energy of the moment. And this is.

[Kid Fury]

Man, I saw it days ago. I said, I'm bookmarking this immediately.

[Crissle West]

I had to do several Googles just to make sure it wasn't raging.

[Kid Fury]

No, same, same, same. I had to find it.

[Crissle West]

Okay, okay. Amazing. Like, indescribable joy.

[Kid Fury]

All right.

[Crissle West]

Um, so I don't feel like we talk. I mean, I'm sorry. I feel like we talked about this already, but it could just because everybody's suing this lady. Nicki Minaj lawyers are suing her.

[Kid Fury]

I don't know that we talked about this. I didn't hear that. This is my first time hearing it, I think. You know, I forget what we say as soon as we got off the mic.

[Crissle West]

The law firm that has been representing Nicki Minaj for a minute, mostly over lawsuits and debt, is now filing a lawsuit against Nicki Minaj alleging that she hasn't paid a bill of upwards $300,000.

[Kid Fury]

Interesting.

[Crissle West]

So apparently back in 2024 is when they agreed to represent Nicki Minaj legally. This was in relation to a copyright infringement lawsuit. And now. Oh, Nikki apparently didn't respond to that lawsuit and resulted in default judgment. I believe we did talk about that.

[Kid Fury]

Okay.

[Crissle West]

But now the law firm is apparently suing her too. Because they ain't paid her. I mean, she ain't paid them, right? No response from her team, of course, her representatives on. On what? That's looking like maybe it's because she's just too busy, you know, having McDonald's nuggies with J.D.

[Kid Fury]

vance, right? Snuggling up Ballroom to these assholes, right? And, I mean, she probably is gonna need these same people to go ahead and pay that bill like the other ones that she has been struggling with. So I guess we're not gonna see her get off of, you know, this MAGA dick anytime soon. But damn, girl, you just hired them in 2024. Like, how are y' all already at the point of suing one another? You. Did you ever pay these niggas, like, anything beyond the retainer? This is insane. But okay, Nick, I'm just not. That she does shocks me anymore.

[Crissle West]

So. Pooh Shiesty's father is saying house arrest is costing him money from his real estate work.

[Kid Fury]

All right, let me just. Let me just look this up, because it ain't no way. Pooh Shiesty,

[Crissle West]

he said in a motion to. Okay, so he was trying to adjust his house arrest so that he could travel within the Western district of Tennessee. Apparently, he says that he owns, manages, and is renovating more than eight properties in the Memphis area, end quote. It has proven extremely difficult to manage the properties and completely and complete the necessary work without being able to leave the house. He says this is his sole source of income. He relies on this to. To pay family, to support his family, to pay his legal fees, so on and so forth.

[Kid Fury]

Okay.

[Crissle West]

And so he's trying to, you know, loosen up the. The rules for the house arrest. Judge David L. Horan said to.

[Kid Fury]

Because. What do you mean? Are you a contractor? Do you actually do the work? Or are you just the person who hires the people who do the work?

[Crissle West]

I mean, I'm guessing. Oh, I guess. Yeah. I guess he just hires them, right? There's no way he wants to go oversee it.

[Kid Fury]

Okay, no, then I'm with the judge. No. Unless you actually lay in the tile, Right? That is why God made FaceTime. Zoom, and all that shit is portable. You can FaceTime from the phone. So. Yeah, no, stay home. Thank you so much.

[Crissle West]

The judge said that his home incarceration was the, quote, least restrictive combination of conditions that will reasonably assure Williams appearance as required and the safety of any other person in the community.

[Kid Fury]

Oh, love that.

[Crissle West]

Federal prosecutors also said. Girl, please. That Williams quote, has not identified any material changes in circumstance that alleviates the concerns that warranted home incarceration in the first place.

[Kid Fury]

Girl.

[Crissle West]

Prosecutors also questions why Williams could not supervise renovation work. Quote from his home via telephone, are using the Internet.

[Kid Fury]

Thank you. What did I just say? Nigga, you're not out there laying the foundation, pouring the concrete. You are not actually building up the kitchen. You can do whatever it is you do. House flipper shit. You can do that from home. So no denied. It's not happening.

[Crissle West]

The judge said.

[Kid Fury]

No. Nigga, we know how you and your son do. We not letting you loose around Memphis to go tie up some loose ends, kill niggas that you ain't killed yet or whatever is you want to go do. No,

[Crissle West]

sweetie, if you had this. If you had this reasonable real estate motion in Memphis, why did you hit your ride on the ground with your son to Atlanta to go kidnap somebody and steal their jewelry?

[Kid Fury]

That's why he got to go, cuz. He done hid cash in these eight houses. He gotta go dig it up.

[Crissle West]

So what the fuck you complain for, bitch?

[Kid Fury]

Oh, I'm trying to make it make sense. But, nigga, you really thought after y' all went and held Gucci Mane at gunpoint and tried to get him to let your son out that contract, you really think that people are going to be like, oh, yeah, you? Yeah, for sure. We're not worried about whether you come to court. Niggas are delusional. You know, you have to ask. You have to ask. The lawyer would be remiss if they didn't ask, but the answer is no.

[Crissle West]

That's true. I know, I know. The lawyer got off Skype with this N and cackled.

[Kid Fury]

So. Oh, yeah, let me ask the judge. Yeah. Mm. Yeah. Yeah, we'll see.

[Crissle West]

That bitch and the judge probably were kiking together. Like, girl, I don't know what she thought was gonna happen, but just go ahead and give me the quote.

[Kid Fury]

Your Honor, legally, I have to. Okay, right before you start laughing. Legally, I have to represent my client. And this nigga said, can he go Kroger?

[Crissle West]

No, his attorney said. His attorney tapped. The judge was like, girl, let me tell you, like, you ain't gonna believe this one.

[Kid Fury]

I don't know what's wrong with that nigga, but, yeah, nothing.

[Crissle West]

Between that and the boosie story, I have been full.

[Kid Fury]

They said, get on the telephone. You don't. You're not installing the doorbell, nigga, the answer is no. 24 hour a day lockdown. You know why? It's that or prison? Because we don't believe that you'll Actually show up to where you're supposed to be, so. Oh, no.

[Crissle West]

And sucks to suck.

[Kid Fury]

Yeah. When you think about the seriousness of the crime that y' all are accused of committing, you ought to be glad you on this side of the bars. The fuck?

[Crissle West]

Genuinely?

[Kid Fury]

Yes. Cause they could have just kept your ass in jail like your son.

[Crissle West]

Kick your feet off and watch the polygamist like I am hoe.

[Kid Fury]

Right.

[Crissle West]

Going nowhere.

[Kid Fury]

Fire up the Hulu. You're not leaving.

[Crissle West]

Copper squad diva.

[Kid Fury]

Played with them.

[Crissle West]

Okay, last but not least, Tyler Perry is firing back at sexual assault accuser Mario Rodriguez. The second sexy one. Well, the sexy one, because I don't

[Kid Fury]

really feel like the white one. Yeah.

[Crissle West]

Anyway, anyways, so Tyler did not sit down for a deposition that was requested or whatever from the accuser, apparently, because he's saying the accuser was planning on asking him about his sexual orientation directly. Like, is he attracted to men? Yada, yada, yada. So apparently he is claiming through attorney, I guess, that his sexual orientation doesn't have anything to do with the case. Like, it's completely irrelevant to the case. He's basically just trying to, quote. He has this, quote, backwards belief that Tyler should, quote, be embarrassed to answer questions about his sexual orientation. So the idea here that he's pushing forward is that Mario is trying to, like, embarrass, use embarrassment to pressure him into settling. Mario Rodriguez and his legal team approached him about a multi million dollar settlements already. They paid it gay paid. I'm sorry, let me rewind it. Approach him. Paid it dust. They said, no, sorry, I'm. I'm super, super gay. And so he's saying that now, basically Mario's trying to harm his reputation, I guess, try to get him to sit on a deputy deposition and say, I'm gay, and is trying to use, like, all of these bullying tactics to. Yeah. Harm Tyler's reputation and try and, you know, push him into doing a settlement rather than going and sitting down and answering a whole bunch of questions that would make him look crazy. And that if. Even if he is attracted to other men, that doesn't have anything to do with what you're accusing him of, which I do appreciate that it's like,

[Kid Fury]

like,

[Crissle West]

men attracted to other men doesn't mean that they're more likely to assault a man.

[Kid Fury]

Right.

[Crissle West]

It's true.

[Kid Fury]

Right. Okay.

[Crissle West]

So.

[Kid Fury]

But I mean, does Tyler Perry think that answering questions about his sexuality would somehow harm his reputation? That's the part I'm stuck at. Like, I'm confused at that. Do you think everybody don't already think you gay.

[Crissle West]

I'm reading wisdom.

[Kid Fury]

Okay, gotcha, gotcha.

[Crissle West]

I have the same questions. I think it would just be the confirmation, but it would also almost give. Like, like your dad. Like, okay, we didn't need this information. Live your life. Yeah, except your dad wasn't, like, weird about it and.

[Kid Fury]

Right.

[Crissle West]

Allegedly grab people by the pussy.

[Kid Fury]

Right.

[Crissle West]

So I think to your point, I don't know how him sitting down and saying yes would harm his reputation. I think it would have, like, a Facebook church era for like a week or two.

[Kid Fury]

Right? But even I feel like even that y' all cannot still be deluded about this. Like, he puts openly gay people in his shows and he is still doing Madea. Like, I just don't. Y' all can't be for real. Like, I think even the Facebook auntie outrage couldn't possibly last longer than a week or so. Cause, like, that's what I'm saying. Look at him. Look at him. Look. Look at him. Look at him. That nigga gave. Right? So. But okay, Tyler, you. You going and protect whatever, whatever deep, deeply held shame you have about your sexuality. You go ahead and keep that covered up, Tyler.

[Crissle West]

Just go ahead and be a butch queen. But I really would like it if you weren't, like, touching people without their consent, manipulating them into weird sexual relationships with them, sending them weird texts of you on a scuba. I mean, on a jet ski, talking

[Kid Fury]

about, you don't see that, stud. Oh, nightmare, Nightmare. I've not stopped thinking about that.

[Crissle West]

Like, I ain't in this picture.

[Kid Fury]

Let's not talk about my ex husband. But anyway, yeah, Tyler, it's the whole coercing out of their jobs if they don't, you know, get naked and let you rub on their nipples. It's. It's that for me, that. That's your real problem.

[Crissle West]

But okay, yeah, that part I don't like. So we'll see. Because, I mean, Tyler said he ain't going for it. It seems like he's. He's. I'm not paying yahoos nothing. So it sounds like then we would have to talk more about this. No.

[Kid Fury]

Yeah, it does. Almost seems like the. The topic is going to come up under oath at some point. So. What are you so afraid of? They can't hurt you. They can't hurt you, Tyler. You're a billionaire. They can hurt you.

[Crissle West]

Maybe ain't scared of shit.

[Kid Fury]

It's just. I mean, maybe. I guess. We'll see.

[Crissle West]

That's gonna be it for Hot Tops for this week.

[Kid Fury]

Amazing.

[Crissle West]

We're gonna take break. Then we're gonna come back and listen to your drama because we know that you have it. The best dancers from across the globe

[Kid Fury]

are about to join me for the

[Crissle West]

audition of a lifetime.

[Kid Fury]

ABC Mondays. Do they have what it takes to compete and be the next Dancing with the Stars pro? I'm here to win.

[Crissle West]

Nothing is going to stop me.

[Kid Fury]

Our star judges will decide. This is what hunger looks like. It was 100% a wrong choice. Robert Irwin hosts.

[Crissle West]

The next era of ballroom starts right here on Dancing with the Stars. The next Pro.

[Kid Fury]

All new Mondays, 8, 7 Central on ABC. Next day on Hulu. The read is brought to you by Planned Parenthood Federation of America. Here's a news flash, y'. All lawmakers are not medical doctors, which is exactly why they should stay out of our health care decisions. But the Trump administration and Congress passed a law to defund Planned Parenthood, blocking patients with low incomes from wellness exams, cancer screenings and essential services. Even worse, some lawmakers want to make the defunding permanent. Planned Parenthood is not backing down, but they need your help. Donate today@planned parenthood.org defend because reproductive rights are human rights.

[Crissle West]

Hey y', all. It is pride that means it's time for joy. It's time for acceptance. This is time for standing 10 toes down in us. It's time for community. And if you're looking for a community of playful, open minded people, then come and get you some proud on at Field. Field is not just a queer app. It is a queer app built by and for the community. And just like pride, Field isn't just for people who are certain of what they got going on. It's also for people who are questioning, evolving, experimenting and discovering. So Pride, girlies, some of your favorite people, introduce them to something new. And if you're on that other side, come be curious, proud and felt at f eeld. Download fyld today. That is f e e l d pronounced like field on the App Store or Google Play. And tell me all about the fun. Write letters into us and tell us all about the friends that you made over on field. Welcome back. Slurs. It's time for your listener letters.

[Kid Fury]

Yes, it is. Send your questions to askthereadmail.com we may read them aloud on the show. We have a couple of quick ones from people who want to know if we've seen certain shows and movies. Dorian said, are y' all seeing the Odyssey? I feel like I have an obligation to because of all the bigoted backlash it's getting. Stay blessed. Just wondering. I'm like the Odyssey. That's when I realized that all these Zendaya looks lately, that is what she has been promoting. Yeah.

[Crissle West]

So a lot of people I think are in that.

[Kid Fury]

Yes. And that. Not that white man who do all the music, the scores and stuff. He just won for Centers. Ludwig Goranson. Oh, yeah, he did the music. So I'm like, okay. Christopher Nolan is the director. Heard good things about him. Elliot Page is in it, and Zendaya, obviously, Tom Holland, Anne Hathaway and Lupita are all in it. So I was like, damn, the Odyssey was high key, boring, you know, when I read it back in middle school or whatever. But yeah, I may actually go see that.

[Crissle West]

I'll stream it. I'm not in a rush. Like, I don't. I feel the same way that you do. When I. When I think about it, I'm like, yeah, I remember the Odyssey, but it feels like. It feels like the marketing for it is fierce because it's everywhere. People will not shut the fuck up about it. It's like the movie of the year. Tease. Like, everybody's like, highly anticipating it. And I think it has to do with the things that you just mentioned. Christopher Nolan's directing this movie with a million and ten faces, most of them quite beloved.

[Kid Fury]

Right.

[Crissle West]

Um, so I think that has a lot to do with why people are raving to go see it. But then I'm like, what's the run time? Do we already know what the run time on this is?

[Kid Fury]

Ooh, I didn't even think of that actually. Like, ooh, three hours.

[Crissle West]

Well, girl, look at them. Look at today. Look, baby cakes. I will see that one at the house, but thanks for asking.

[Kid Fury]

Three hours. Maybe I won't. Oh, yeah.

[Crissle West]

Wait, what's the bigoted backlash?

[Kid Fury]

Oh, probably because Lupita's in it. And no, I'm not even joking. I think it. Because look at the rest of this cast. Like, sorry, no. So I think it's because she's playing probably Helena Troy or something, and they're like, oh, my God, Lupita is supposed to be the most beautiful woman in the world. Lupita's supposed to be. Yes, yes.

[Crissle West]

Oh, my God, you're so right.

[Kid Fury]

I'm sure that that's it. So.

[Crissle West]

And transphobic.

[Kid Fury]

Yeah, yeah.

[Crissle West]

So it's literally because Elliot and Lupita are in the movie.

[Kid Fury]

Yep, there we go. It's because Elliot and Lupita are in it.

[Crissle West]

I did see some people giving it criticism because every people in the movie have American accents.

[Kid Fury]

Oh,

[Crissle West]

okay. Well, all Right.

[Kid Fury]

It's a bunch of American actors.

[Crissle West]

All right. Like, I don't.

[Kid Fury]

I don't know how historically accurate it's

[Crissle West]

supposed to be, but will I watch it? Yes.

[Kid Fury]

Now that I see it's three hours. Yeah. That may be an at home exclusive, actually.

[Crissle West]

Yeah.

[Kid Fury]

And then a question here about if you've seen Obsession or Back Rooms, which I've. I've heard of Obsession. And the. The whole premise of that movie freaks me the fuck out. So the answer to me, for me is no, I have not seen either one of those.

[Crissle West]

I think that if you could, if you watched Obsession, I think that you would have pretty. I think you have pretty dope things to say about it. Like, I think you would have, like, a lot of great commentary on the themes of it.

[Kid Fury]

Yeah, I think I would too.

[Crissle West]

But then you have to watch it.

[Kid Fury]

Right.

[Crissle West]

And I don't know.

[Kid Fury]

And I. That man knows exactly what he's doing to that girl.

[Crissle West]

It's really fierce. I haven't seen backrooms yet. I did buy it. I'm gonna watch it probably tonight or this weekend. But Obsession was so good. It was really, really good. Simple premise, you know, be careful what you wish for.

[Kid Fury]

Yep.

[Crissle West]

The way that it materializes is it's really impressive. The young woman who plays the lead character, Nikki, her acting was phenomenal. The way that she was able to show the range of the characters she's

[Kid Fury]

playing,

[Crissle West]

it was really, really impressive to me. I loved that it was mostly like a psyological horror thriller.

[Kid Fury]

Yeah.

[Crissle West]

But it also had pretty standard horror elements, like creepy horror things to it that were just bigger than. This person is now obsessed with you due to a supernatural wish from wherever. There are moments of it that were genuinely scary and creepy and whatever. So I loved it. Obsession's one of my favorite movies so far of the year.

[Kid Fury]

Oh, wow.

[Crissle West]

Because not only was it scary and well performed it, I have so much to say about it in terms of like consent, misogyny, the male ego, manipulation. There's just so many elements of it that were really interesting that are really interesting to. To converse with people about people who've seen it.

[Kid Fury]

Yeah.

[Crissle West]

And yeah, at the end of the day, Bear's the horrible Bear's the evil bear's the villain. He's a terrible human being. And, you know, that's. That I don't spoil the rest of the movie.

[Kid Fury]

Yeah.

[Crissle West]

But fuck Bear. Bitch ass nigga. One of the worst types of. Is the one. I was gonna say something from Insecure. Oh, I can't remember the specific line. Yeah, but it's like you're a fuckboy that thinks he's a good nigger or something.

[Kid Fury]

That's what Tasha said to Lawrence. Yeah. And she was. I mean, in that moment she was not wrong because like, yep, you. You doing all this and your feelings are clearly over there with Issa and you got me anyway. Shout out Insecure. Did you see they're going on tour?

[Crissle West]

I did.

[Kid Fury]

I said, oh, the girlies are going to eat that up.

[Crissle West]

I love that.

[Kid Fury]

Yeah, that's a great idea actually. Anyway, okay. Probably not gonna see that movie, but thank you for the question. Our next letter comes from Uma, who says hey Crystal And Wes, I'm 32 years old and I'm living with my mom and stepfather until the end of this month I'll be sharing a house with my homegirl from college, but I still have to pack up my bedroom and closet. I work a lot so I haven't really had the time to do it yet. I've recently started going to the gym consistently to improve my health and help me focus. I get off at 10pm and head straight to the gym when I can. I've tried working out before my shift, but I never wake up early enough on account of my depression and inability to slow my brain down when it's time for bed. The gym is about 10 minutes from my parents house, which is very convenient for me. The problem is that the household is not convenient for me or my new schedule. One night last week I got home around midnight and sent a group text asking if either of them was awake to unlock the door. After a couple of minutes of no response, I grabbed my work bag and hustled up the path with my key in hand. Once I unlocked the screen door and both locks of the main door, I saw my mother's husband in the recliner watching Netflix but still having the time and the audacity to turn and smile at me and say what's up? I thought, does this nigga hate me? It's not like he responded later saying my bad, my phone was charging, I didn't hear it, etc. The message just went unanswered. Tonight is the second time that I've been ignored and I'm ready to commence hostility. Most nights my mom is asleep and he's free almost every evening after work, so he is always in that chair. He has no problem getting up to watch her get in her car when she leaves to work nights, and the only time he's made sure I got in safely is when I'm coming in as she's leaving out. This is an issue because there's wildlife out around our home at that time. And I make sure to watch my back when I turn the key because I have. I've had raccoons and possums creep up on me on separate occasions. Right. It's getting really discouraging, but the thought of postponing my workout regimen until I move would absolutely set me back. I would talk to my mom about it, but she is a certified pick me who has gotten on me for complaining about her man, her man, her man in the past. Nobody wants me out of this house more than I do. And I definitely won't be visiting them for a while when I leave. But I want to know, should I be offended by my mom's husband's inactions and lack of response? What would y' all do in this situation? I might just have to drive the 30 minutes from the gym to my future house and sleep on the couch on the nights that I train because I cannot think of any other solution. I would really value yalls unbiased opinions. Please help Uma. Interesting.

[Crissle West]

I just. I. I have questions. Okay, you start.

[Kid Fury]

Well, I mean, I didn't really get the problem here until you said, it's coons and possums outside. And then I was like, oh, right, okay. So I was like, why. Why would it matter if he. If he was, you know, like, watching you or responded to your text within a couple of minutes or. It honestly sounds like this is like a straw that broke the camel's back type of situation, where it's been years of him getting on your nerves and doing shit that bothers you or whatever. And so now this is one more thing that kind of feels small to me as an outsider, but for you, it's like, nigga, I'm leaving in three weeks. I'm texting at midnight when you are wide awake and in the living room. You know, it's all kind of creepy crawlies and shit out here. Like, it's a lack of consideration, I think, for you or, you know, your well being, caring about your whereabouts, et cetera, et cetera. So I think I do understand. However, I also think because you are leaving in two or three weeks, getting worked up about his inaction or lack his actions or lack thereof, and knowing your mama is going to pick her man over you no matter what you say, I'mma just carry a little, you know, the little, like, keychain flashlights. I have one that when I take Lani on Late night walks.

[Crissle West]

Oh, yeah.

[Kid Fury]

So that the light is just right there. I would probably get one of those, put it on my keychain and shine it bright until I could get in the house, try to keep the coons. Cause again, like, girl, fucking rabies. I just might get bit by a fucking raccoon on my way up the porch. Like that is that. That feels wild. But. Yeah.

[Crissle West]

Wow.

[Kid Fury]

But getting let it. Letting it throw me off. Like, the gym is a good thing for you. It's a healthy place for you. You go to regulate yourself. You mentioned having issues with focusing, and the gym helps with that. There's no reason for you to inconvenience yourself even more because of your mama's husband. Like, I think I would just deal with it until I moved and then count on one hand the number of times I talked to that man again until his death, like. Cause clearly you don't fuck with me. Clearly you don't. Like, I just can't imagine being in a relationship with somebody and their adult child lives with us. And I know it's all kinds of wild animals outside around the house. And I don't cut. Like, at the bare minimum, I'll cut the porch light on until you get home or something. Like, it's almost like you don't give a damn what happened to me. So. Yeah, that's how I think I would handle it.

[Crissle West]

Yeah. So a couple of things for me, I'm like, why didn't you knock on the door? Also, it sound like you just don't like your stepdaddy, which sounds fair. I just. I was fascinated on how we landed where we did because it sounded like you started with this thing with the gym and the inconvenience of getting in from there. And I understand it because of the possums and the raccoons and the opossums and the things. But ultimately, it sound like you just hate this nigga. And like. Like Crystal just said, if you have like, three weeks before you out of there. And it's this letting me into the house thing. All of the. Like, I'm not gonna say nothing to my mom because she always picked this bitch. And all he doing is sitting down here and watching cops. And I just hate it. Sound like you maybe need to venture. You simply need advance about this nigga that you can't stand and the reasons why. And I'm not invalidating any of that. He sounds annoying. But again, I don't know how much of a problem this is outside of being agitating.

[Kid Fury]

Right. I would. Can we just make it so that your journey from your car to the front door goes as quickly as possible. Because driving 30 minutes to the future house to sleep on the couch after the gym just because of this sounds like doing too much, right? That just seems like us. Just like there has to be a more reasonable solution here, especially because it's so temporary. But yeah, I bet if we asked you about this, you would have a long list of shit this man has said and done that has gotten on your nerves over the years. And yeah, knowing that your mama is gonna pick him over you no matter what anyway is probably a whole nother letter in and of itself. But yeah, yeah, good luck. Uma. You look. You moving out? Okay, you finna go share a house with your homegirl and that's what really matters. You finna be free here in just a minute. So keep your eyes focused on that. Good luck to you. Our next letter comes from Ray who says hi. Chris Lincoln Fury. I'm a 22 year old recent college grad who by the grace of God got a job offer right after I graduated. There are two studs who work in my office for whom I am starting to develop some feelings.

[Crissle West]

Two of them. All right.

[Kid Fury]

Stud number one, Sakura is super flirtatious. Sakura S A K U R A Sakura. Sakura is super flirtatious and has invited me to do stuff outside of work. Stud number two, Hinata.

[Crissle West]

Yeah, that was it.

[Kid Fury]

Anime. This must be anime shit.

[Crissle West]

It's Naruto.

[Kid Fury]

Naruto. Oh yeah, I know Naruto. Hinata is very shy but we always talk when she gets a chance. Because she's so busy with work. We've bonded over attending the same church. Our nerdy interests like anime and other things and I've enjoyed getting to know the both of them. But there is one small problem. Technically, I am still in a long distance relationship with my boyfriend of one year.

[Crissle West]

Love it.

[Kid Fury]

He is also a college graduate, but he's having trouble finding a job. Luckily the distance isn't too bad, but since I got my job it feels like we're going in opposite directions. He has crashed his car, gotten arrested for possessing weed and has gone through tremendous financial problems. So much so that we barely go out and when we do, I usually end up driving and paying the tab. He's the youngest son and I'm the eldest daughter. In our families the list of shit has. The list of shit that's happened goes on and on. But basically he hasn't really been boyfriend incorrectly since all of this started happening. Back in October. Other than that though, he's an extremely good guy and we're very similar to each other. We are even both bi. We've also never fought and he is incredibly good at accepting feedback when we have disagreements. He has been nothing but loyal and kind to me since we started dating. He says he's working on himself so we can be together and we should be patient. But I'm finding it hard to wait. Is it wrong for me to expect my boyfriend to find a job so quickly, even in this economy? Do you think it's worth it for me to wait? And if not, can I get some tips on how to talk to girls?

[Crissle West]

I mean. Anyway,

[Kid Fury]

I didn't fully accept my bisexuality until college, and since I went to a pwi, my type was nowhere to be found, so my WLW experience is lacking. I'm really not sure how to know when girls even like me. Thanks, Ray. Girl. She said, if the man's not worth it, how do I get these dykes on my team?

[Crissle West]

I love it.

[Kid Fury]

I do too.

[Crissle West]

Huh? Okay, first of all, what was the name?

[Kid Fury]

Ray.

[Crissle West]

First of all, Ray, I would have gone with like Tsunade and Temari maybe, since they're more studly. I don't know. What, like Sakura? Hinata, Soft girl. I mean. Anyways, not the point. I think this is amazing. Do I think it is unreasonable to want your man to get a job at a certain speed in this economy?

[Kid Fury]

Right. It's a little unfair in this economy. It is.

[Crissle West]

I would judge by the intent and the like. I don't know. I can't think of the word, like, how hard you are working towards getting the job.

[Kid Fury]

Yeah.

[Crissle West]

You're kind of so so about it. Or I have to like remind you about some shit right then. Yeah, I'm gonna get frustrated.

[Kid Fury]

Yeah.

[Crissle West]

But if I see you, like, pounding the fucking pavement and it's not working out, then I can't. Why would. I can't get.

[Kid Fury]

It's rough out here.

[Crissle West]

Yeah, it is horrendous.

[Kid Fury]

It's really bad. Yes. So I agree. The amount of effort you're putting into finding a job matters more than whether you have one. Because I know people who have been applying for over a year and still can't find nothing decent. So that. That is the least I think of your worries. When of all the shit you listed with this young man, I was like,

[Crissle West]

what that got to do with these two lesbians?

[Kid Fury]

I mean, and I guess they looking good. Cause you know they got a job. They right there. At work. So you know where they at.

[Crissle West]

And, you know, they're like Naruto and they.

[Kid Fury]

And yeah, y'. All. Y' all watching the same anime and shit, but.

[Crissle West]

Hmm.

[Kid Fury]

I don't think, though, if. If the only issue was the job, then I would say, yeah, it's worth it to wait. But it sounds like he's asking you to wait for him to grow up, and that is totally different.

[Crissle West]

Yeah, that's completely different.

[Kid Fury]

Because. What you mean you crashing your car and getting arrested for which I mean. Weed possession. Come on, man. That.

[Crissle West]

I know.

[Kid Fury]

So stupid. But you know, right?

[Crissle West]

Can't believe that's the living thing.

[Kid Fury]

Right? Also, with him being the youngest son, he might be used to people just kind of bailing him out of stuff. That's kind of like a stereotype. That be fitting because let me tell you something about Adam. That nigga had a whole different childhood than I did. Okay. What? That nigga can do whatever you want to do. Don't get me started.

[Crissle West]

Yeah.

[Kid Fury]

So, yeah, even though he sounds like a nice guy, he doesn't sound like he's the most mature or the most responsible.

[Crissle West]

Yeah.

[Kid Fury]

And I think that is a reason to break up more than the. The job thing is.

[Crissle West]

Agreed.

[Kid Fury]

As far as these girls and whether they like you, the fact that one of them is outright asking you to hang out outside of work. Oh, my God. Do queer women. Queer women. Do y' all have to be hit with bats? She's literally. You said she's super flirtatious and she has invited you to do stuff outside of work. What do you think she trying to do other than sniff that thing?

[Crissle West]

What I mean.

[Kid Fury]

I mean, number. The fact. And number two is you said she's very shy and she's busy a lot, but she always makes time to talk to you when she has a chance. That's also a sign. It's not as obvious as the. As Sakura. It's not as obvious as what Sakura is doing, But I bet if you gave a little flirty energy. Why don't you just try looking them in the eyes? Do you look them in the eyes? Look. That's what I like to do. If I think a girl is fine, I'll look her in the eyes and maybe touch her wrist or something. That's all you have to do. That's really. It's not hard. So this. Yeah.

[Crissle West]

Imagine looking her looking someone in the eyes being legitimate advice for flirting with someone. And it's needed advice. Like it's not even. It sounds simple. Yeah, but you would be Shocked.

[Kid Fury]

A little eye contact. Yep. A little physical contact. Oh, and a little smile. Yes. Yeah, that'll get him. That'll get him. But, you know, don't let these studs be the reason you break up with your man. Break up with him because he's still out here being wild and, you know, you feeling adult. You like, I'm 22. I'm putting away childish things. So I. Yeah, that would be my advice to you, Miss Girl.

[Crissle West]

Yeah, agreed. I would say the very same thing. Like, I feel I was going, okay. The boyfriend thing seems completely separate from the studs thing, if anything. Yeah, it does sound like you're not feeling as connected to the boyfriend as you would like to. And then at the same time, you're being tempted with this whole other thing on the other side. But the boyfriend does sound like. Yeah, he sounds like the childish youngest one who's gonna maybe mature at 40.

[Kid Fury]

Oh, nightmare.

[Crissle West]

It's just kicking back comfortable with you because you feel like you ain't going nowhere. Yeah, that's bigger than just the job sitch, right?

[Kid Fury]

Oh, but I would also say, while I'm giving you advice on how to flirt with these hoes at work, do not date nobody you work with.

[Crissle West]

Oh, right.

[Kid Fury]

I forgot.

[Crissle West]

How did we forget that?

[Kid Fury]

Don't do that almost girl. She said she mentioned in parentheses that she's in Atlanta. It's a trillion studs. Go find one that don't work there.

[Crissle West]

Just toss a pebble, bitch. You will strike one.

[Kid Fury]

Right? They are everywhere. Go flirt with somebody you do not work with, child. Do not do it. But good luck if you do.

[Crissle West]

Oh, no, that's trifling.

[Kid Fury]

Never mind. Oh, no. Hear it. We have to.

[Crissle West]

I was gonna say maybe one or two of them. It's like a club night. Like when they going out somewhere, you're likely to directly interact with other studs.

[Kid Fury]

Yeah. Oh.

[Crissle West]

That you don't work with for sure.

[Kid Fury]

For sure.

[Crissle West]

Like so if you just want low hanging fruit.

[Kid Fury]

Yeah, you got it. You're good. You're good.

[Crissle West]

I think you'll figure it out.

[Kid Fury]

All right, best of luck, Ray. That is gonna. Oh, oh, I forgot one of our quick questions. This one is from Marley Marle, who said, who's the hardest video game boss that you've ever encountered? That stressed you out? Or maybe you thought you were never going to finish the game. Were you able to push through and find a way to win? Or did you give up entirely? This actually says the three hardest video game bosses. I don't know about three, but let me Tell you something. Fucking breath of the wild. That electricity nigga name her bitch Thunderblight Ganon. Her Thunderblight Ganon was the single biggest piece of bullshit in that game. Regular Calamity Ganon was easier than Thunderblight Ganon. Bitch. I don't understand. I don't understand why it was that hard. I had the whole rubber outfit and the anti shock tinctures and tonics and shit. Bitch. And he was still frying my ass. Thunder Black Ganon was terrible. That's it for me. By far the worst. Never met none worser.

[Crissle West]

Okay. I can't remember the name of this character. Let me see if I can find it. He's Kingdom Hearts 2. He's the organization 13 member. That Demix. He has this guitar and he can summon water or some shit like that. You fight him as you're going into that big heartless war in the second one or whatever.

[Kid Fury]

Nope.

[Crissle West]

That man beat my ass so many times when I played that as a child. I literally put the game down for like two months.

[Kid Fury]

Oh yeah.

[Crissle West]

Cause I was like, I don't know if I could beat this motherfucker.

[Kid Fury]

And it's pissed me off.

[Crissle West]

I want to finish this game. It's pissing me off. I'll come back later. Eventually I went back later and was able to do it. But that one dragged the fuck out of me. Probably Sephiroth. The final Sephiroth fight in the last final. I mean in the original Final Fantasy 7. And yeah. I mean if I can choose one of the crystal chose. I would say that Thunderblight Ganon bitch. Because that's another one. I put the game down.

[Kid Fury]

Yeah. Because it was pissing me off. I was legit angry. I was so mad.

[Crissle West]

It was like, how am I getting jumped? I thought there was one like, what is happening?

[Kid Fury]

And you gotta use the metal poles to shock him back. But if you hold it too long, it'll shock you like, oh my God, bro.

[Crissle West]

That fight was ass.

[Kid Fury]

It was. That fight that was such bullshit rough. I'm like, maybe we just don't. Maybe we just don't have all four of the powers. Child. Maybe we. I wanted to give Bad Ooh.

[Crissle West]

One more black myth. Wukong. That big giant rat guy. The second final or the second chapter's final boss. That big old rat monster, man. With the staff and the sand tornadoes and all that shit. That man worked my set, bitch. I put that motherfucker down for a minute. And I had got the little optional thing, that bell or whatever, that secret thing to also like Sort of make the fight easier. That motherfucker was beating my. I thought I was never gonna finish that game.

[Kid Fury]

Yeah,

[Crissle West]

amazing question. Loved that question.

[Kid Fury]

Love that. Marlee Morrow, thank you for retriggering me. That whole journey, that whole part of the game is. I mean it's so fun. But child, are both that that motherfucker

[Crissle West]

was truly the hardest.

[Kid Fury]

It was so hard. But that electricity power that you, you do, it is c you.

[Crissle West]

Yeah, it really is you.

[Kid Fury]

You can just, you can just kill animals. Like you could just kill a bison or whatever and you have cooked meat

[Crissle West]

that'll spawn cuz it's like literally.

[Kid Fury]

So it was great. But child, you had to work for that. You did. You, you, everybody don't get it. If you know, you know. All right, that is going to wrap up the letters this week. If you have a question for us, send us an email. Babe. Asktheread gmail.com. we'll be right back, guys.

[Crissle West]

This episode of the show is being brought to you by Better Help. Summer means a lot of activities for a lot of us. Many people are traveling, most by car. Kids are out of school, everybody's trying to go to brunch and day parties and all kinds of stuff like that. It can be a lot can be mentally taxing. But whether you're someone like myself who just feels like they've got winter weight, or you just, you know, you're someone who thrives, you're trying to survive in the summer, whatever it is, you gotta take care of yourself. Therapy with BetterHelp, the world's largest online therapy platform, can help you understand your needs, feel more confidence, and create a version of summer that actually feels good. Just take a short questionnaire to identify your needs and Preferences and BetterHelp will handle the initial therapist matching for you. Feel confident knowing betterhelp therapists work according to a strict code of conduct and are fully licensed in the U.S. we've read your letters. Some of you need that. You don't have to say yes to everything this summer. Find support in therapy, Sign up and get 10% [e-mail] the read that is better. H E L P.com there. Hey guys. This episode is being brought to you by ZipRecruiter. You know what? As I'm getting older, I have to make sure that I can use a time saving hack or two in my everyday life. Like eating a giant bowl of strawberry banana Cheerios as I'm editing a video or writing like burning calories as I chase link around my apartment. You know Things like that. But if you're a business owner, how can you save time hiring? It's a question that needs answer and I will tell you. ZipRecruiter has a new feature that quickly lets you see the most interested and qualified candidates first. So you save time by meeting the right people faster. And I can tell you from firsthand experience, it gets tricky. And right now you can try for [e-mail] thereead their powerful matching technology finds qualified candidates very, very quickly. Candidates can tell you in their own words why they're interested in the job. And this is why Zipreruder is the number one rated hiring site based on G2. Now save time and meet great candidates sooner. With ZipRecruiter, 4 out of 5 employers who post on ZipRecruiter get a qualified candidate within the first day. So how many days do you get to save? If little Tommy had. Try it for [e-mail] theread that's ziprecruiter.com theread meet your match on ZipRecruiter. Tell them they sent you. Let's move on. Hey, guys. This episode is being brought to you by factoring. It's a long day. Hunger has hit you. Cooking is exhausting. Something healthy in your fridge that you should be making, like the collard greens I got, but you just don't have it in you. Okay, Sounds very familiar. A lot of us go through it, and that's why I personally love factor. You can get fully prepared meals designed by dietitians, crafted by real chefs, delivered right to your door. And that way you can hit your nutrition goals, not have to worry about that extra time, not have to worry about running to the grocery store. And they have over a hundred meals that rotate every week, including globally inspired flavors like Mediterranean and Asian and so on. And I'm gonna tell you about this honey butter chicken breast. Baby cakes. Baby cakes. This is one thing I love, is some food. And if I love anything about food, it's not having to cook it myself. So head over to factor meals.com the read 50 off and use code the read 50 off to get 50 off and free daily greens per box with new subscription only while supplies last until September 27, 2026. See website for more details. Go get your grub on. Let's move on. We are back, ladies and slurs. It is time now for the read. Take it away, Krystal. I can't wait.

[Kid Fury]

Oh, on July 13th or I'm sorry, on July 12th. Boosie tweeted my new lawsuit in court, exclamation mark, will be national news tomorrow. Amazing. The next day, he tweeted, jack, shut your lion ass up. Talking about this stuff in Houston messed up the pardon. You was sued in March. This happened at the end of May. Now, let me go back in case you don't know what. Where all of this is coming from. Boosie Badass, who has a. A long rap sheet. Okay. Boosie has been in and out of prison for decades. Apparently, on New Year's Day, he got a call from his lawyer saying that he had gotten a pardon from Donald Trump and that these two men that Boosie had paid in late 2025 had, like, gotten this pardon done for him. Now, these people are Jacob Wall and Jack Berkman, who are, I guess, lawyers and lobbyists at J.M. berkman and Associates charged Boosie's dumb ass $600,000. Thousand of them things, $600,000. And you may be wondering, but, Crystal, where did Boosie come up with $600,000? I don't know, baby. That's an excellent question. Now, why would he try to get a pardon? Well, again, because like I said, he's been in and out of prison for a very long time. He's got a very long federal rap sheet. He was getting ready to be sentenced for possessing a firearm as a felon. So he had a lot of reasons to want this pardon. These white men, after three months, said that they had got it. However, the pardon never actually came through because I'm sure Trump said, who the fuck is Boosie? And went to sleep. And so now Boosie is suing because he wants half of that $600,000 back.

[Crissle West]

Yeah.

[Kid Fury]

So delicious as you do when you have a lawsuit pending, you go on Twitter and this is. So Jack was one of the lobbyists that he was talking to. That's who's this tweet that I was just reading was directed at. So he went back and said, don't start lying now. I gave you three months to send my money back. Talking about Trump signed the pardon, got me running around the damn house, jumping silly eye emoji, saying, you just talked to the President. You played with the wrong one. I'm suing y' all in federal court now. Hashtag Ponzi scheme out the nine victims y' all got this year. I was the wrong one. Everyone said you reached out. Everyone you said you reached out to for my pardon has said you are lying. Every name you named has denied your allegations. Everybody you named will have Their time to speak. It's getting hot. Goofy smile emoji. So where did the money go? I thought Trump signed the pardon. I thought you had the President on speed dial. You should have did your research before trying to jack me like you did the others. Hashtag, I'm loved and respected. There was another tweet. Oh, he's not done. There's another tweet.

[Crissle West]

Oh, come on.

[Kid Fury]

With a list of names. It says, Laura Loomer, Mike Cernovich, Jack Posobiek, Erica Kirk, Mike Johnson, Nancy Mace, Andy. Big thanks. Can the names above please make a truthful statement about having contact or no contact with Berkman in whole about my pardon process? 600k was taken from me with your names mentioned in emails by these people. Exclamation marks. Thanks. Okay, so Boosie's finding out the hard way that you cannot bribe openly. You just cannot. You can't pay for pardons. This or. Well, and you know what? Given the fact that it is the Trump administration, I see how you thought you could, but when the country is working like it's supposed to, and there are checks and balances and things, you are not supposed to be able to just give somebody some money, and then you come back with a federal pardon. And if you did, typically you would have to give the money directly to that person. Person. I don't know if your attorney was present when you decided to give these two white men this money. It seems like an incredibly stupid idea to me. Laura Loomer, who is not somebody I know, but Boosie called her out by name, so she responded to the tweet with her name in it and said, I don't get involved in this type of work and have no idea what you're talking about. No offense, but I also have no idea who you are and I have never heard of your case. Seems like Berkman is using people's names without permission to get business. That's also not how the pardon process works. You can't pay for a pardon. Not sure who told you that's how it works. Oh, hey, that's actually embarrassing because. So Boosie is now suing these people for, I think, $10 million. That's what he said to DJ Akademiks. He's suing for 10 million and for the return of half of the fee that he paid. And I just. So I went, I said, this can't be real. You know, like, I saw a bunch of screenshots. I had to go read this article about it. This says that

[Crissle West]

the.

[Kid Fury]

The Contract that Boosie signed with this law firm is full of typos and errors, right? It even there. So it says here. This includes a provision that would allow Boosie to request a partial refund of the $600,000 fee if the lobbyist had not secured a pardon by close of business on January 31, 2025, which was several months before the agreement was even signed. So it also sounds like these people put some sort of contract like this. This looks like Chad, GPT, maybe even came up with this contract. Everybody involved signed it anyway. And them. Them white men ran off with Boosie's money. Now, they also said that they're basically. They said they're basically broke and they ain't got it. And also, they've never worked harder for anybody than they did for Boosie. This says, quote, this firm cannot think of a single client for whom we have done more work than Boosie. This includes a massive, highly tailored advocacy campaign across Congress, the executive branch, and leading political influencers and media figures. We continue to believe that Boosie very much deserves a pardon. End quote. This means that they talked to all the crackers they possibly could and they either didn't know who you were or didn't give one fucking fuck about you. And I feel like, you know, I'm putting aside the fact that black people are targeted more for bullshit and we spend more time in jail for the same crimes and all that. And I'm just gonna land right at. Sometimes you. You just gotta. You just gotta take what you got.

[Crissle West]

You gotta know when to hold and when to fold them.

[Kid Fury]

You gotta know when to hold them and when to fucking fold them. Boosie, you have been in trouble since the 90s.

[Crissle West]

Jesus.

[Kid Fury]

Why. Why? Did you really think you could scrounge up? Who did you get $600,000 cash from? Girl? I'm. And I'm so for real. How did Boosy come up with $600,000 to wire or issue a check or whatever to anybody else?

[Crissle West]

Did you see? They're convicted fraudsters. Like everybody in the streets know that they are scammers.

[Kid Fury]

I did not even got to that part of it. They also, I think they had said, you know, we did. We've worked with eight or nine different people who have all gotten pardons. And then this news article was like, we have found one. We have found one person who actually got a pardon. And it didn't have nothing to do with the rest of this. You know, a lot of these people ended up pleading or not getting anything at all. But yeah, these niggas the Berkman and Associates reported $3.2 million in federal lobbying revenue in 2025, which includes the money from Boosie. But what I'm also certain it did not include was a promise they was actually going to do anything for you. You.

[Crissle West]

They can't promise.

[Kid Fury]

But. So that's what Boosie is saying. He was like, you know, this list of people, he's like, they name dropped y' all when they were talking to me. And they made it sound like they had the pres. This is what Boosie's people and representatives are saying that, like, oh, they sent me a text message saying that the president has the pardon in his hand and he's ready to sign it and everything is all good. And they acted like they could just call the president on speed dial and name dropped all these people that they've worked with, and none of it was real. And they were all just scamming me. Well, yeah.

[Crissle West]

Yeah, girl.

[Kid Fury]

Yeah.

[Crissle West]

Talk about some of y' all chose the wrong one. I think they chose the right one.

[Kid Fury]

I think. I think they chose the exact perfect, most perfectest right one. Because who else has or would find $600,000 to give these people? Like, who. Who else would put themselves in this situation? Boosie? Who else would do that? It's all. I actually think what is much easier than trying to get Donald Trump's extremely racist ass to pardon you for all the things that you've absolutely done is stop doing those things that you've absolutely done.

[Crissle West]

You know, again, like, looking someone in the eye, it feels like it should just be on the paper, like, right there.

[Kid Fury]

It feels like. I feel like your attorney should have said, you know, Boosie, $600,000 can go a long way. And, you know, it might even go toward, like, I just feel like we can take that money and put it towards doing something good for you and your family. Like, maybe we keep you out of trouble, make sure you don't have no more guns in your house, make sure you not driving under the influence and every woman around you is of age and all this. And so, yeah, these. These known scammers responded and was like, yeah, we. We've. All we've done is. Is try and it's not our fault. And the White House said, y', all. Whatever y' all got going on, that shit don't have nothing to do with us. And literally, we can't even comment about whether Trump looked at it.

[Crissle West]

And just because we did say they told you, said what they saw, what they said to Lauren Russell.

[Kid Fury]

No. What the White House or the attorneys?

[Crissle West]

The White House statements. Laura.

[Kid Fury]

Lauren no, they didn't.

[Crissle West]

It says the statement to me. This is Laura Laurenson on Twitter. She said the White House did. The White House did receive something from Megan Blanca regarding quote boozy badass receipt of documents should not be taken to mean anything other than documents have been received. Yes, the President is the ultimate decider on any clemency related actions. The team at the White House working on clemency has never heard from Wolf or Berkman, did not support their work and would advise anyone seeking clemency that their involvement will actively harm their chances. The President finds it detestable that anyone would even attempt to profit off pardons work.

[Kid Fury]

Lauren. Now first of all, we know y' all don't find that detestable at all. You are only disgusted that it got out in the open. You absolutely would sell pardons the same way y' all would chop up and sell the rest of this country. You're not going to convince me that Trump is just too good for this. Like, oh, that's the moral line in the sand for Donald Trump. No, it's that $600 is a drop in the bucket to, to those people and your black ass ain't worth the trouble or the stress. That's all there is to that. I can't believe you thought this would work, Boosie. Like, I know you not the, the brightest crayon in the box, but God damn, bro.

[Crissle West]

Incredible.

[Kid Fury]

I got a bridge to sell you, Boosie. The fuck in what world I, I don't. Right? No, same. I've, I've been looking at that for days and, and reading the article. I didn't see this about Lauren LaRosa, but I do love that. But I've been reading everything else about it. Like, y' all cannot be serious. Who. And then his lawyer gonna chime in, like, well, you know, when people are going through difficult situations, they just want to have hope that things are going to work out and, and these guys took advantage of Boosie's hope. Girl, that is a grown man. He knows exactly what he's been doing. He knows all about the felonies he's been committing. We don't have to act like he needs to be protected or coddled in any way. A fool and his money are soon parted. And I was going to, I' ma just say this very quickly. Fuck Caitlin Clark, okay? I, I, I've always seen her for who she is. However, I've also not spoken too much about her because there's already too much being said about her. Like she gets too much attention for the level of talent that she actually has. It's very clear that the Magas have attached themselves to her and they're making her their spokesperson and she does not have a problem with that. However, the.

[Crissle West]

This was a basketball player.

[Kid Fury]

She is. She is. She is Congress. They. I'm so glad you said that, actually, because this is a basketball player and yet that Congress is getting involved with WNBA games. They sent a letter on July 7 to Kathy Engelbert, who is the commissioner of the WNBA, and the letter says, Caitlin Clark is transforming women's sports. She's inspired all these girls. She's the face of the league. She has significantly increased fan interest and driven television ratings. And. And you and all of those black dyke bitches on that court are so mean to her. I'm not joking. They said. They said straight up, how are you going to protect Caitlin Clark?

[Crissle West]

Congress.

[Kid Fury]

Yes. Because she has been hip checked and poked in the eye and struck in the throat. Girl, this isn't fucking T ball. Basketball is a contact sport. This is professional basketball. Yes. She's going to be fouled the same way she's going to foul people. It happens all the time, intentionally or not. Anyway, they go on and on to say that, like, Caitlin Clark is their darling, precious girl and the WNBA is failing to protect her. The officiating is not doing what they're supposed to do. And as commissioner, you have an obligation to make sure that Caitlin Clark is okay. And so we, the members of Congress, want to know, what is your review mechanism for physical hostility and violence on the court? And how are you going to hold players accountable for being overly aggressive to Caitlin Clark? Yes. And it's 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11 Republican members of Congress have signed their names to this letter to Kathy Engelbert about making sure that Caitlin Clark don't get fouled on the court no more. Child, we talking about a play when the Fever were playing the Mercury, a play where Alyssa Thomas tripped over Caitlyn, who was flopping to try to draw the foul, and got up and kept going. And her fist was like on Caitlyn's throat. It was half a second. When you slow it down, it looks bad, but it's half a second of play. Again, this is professional basketball. The girlies are. Anyway, Alyssa got in trouble for that way after the fact. She got suspended, I think, for the next game. And it's been nothing but harassment and bullshit towards anybody who gets Caught up in any sort of on court, whatever with Caitlin Clark, the same thing. So Alyssa Thomas and her wife, fiance Dewana Bonner, who also plays for the Mercury, they started talking about how they've been getting death threats and crazy people on social media, sending them all these crazy things about them and their kids and because of, because of Caitlin, because Caitlin Clark got fouled during a game, mind you, after the fact. They went back after the game, they went back and gave Alyssa, what, a technical foul or whatever kind of foul and then suspended her for the next game. So she got in trouble for something that should not have been that big of a deal in the first fucking place. But then the same thing happened when the Fever played the Aces. Except this time I don't even think Chelsea Gray touched Caitlin Clark and she was flopping all over the goddamn place anyway. And now Chelsea is getting death threats and somebody posted, she posted on her stories a screenshot of a DM she got where somebody was like, you suck, you dirty, you know, Caitlin Clark forever or some something crazy racist like that. And so she posted it and didn't block out the screen name. So people found him, hit up his job and then eventually the job was like, yeah, we fired him because you can't be in DMS calling basketball player nigger bitches or whatever. But these are Caitlin Clark's fans. And so that's why what I was really going to talk about was not even the league, not even the Magas and the crazy racist white people who never gave a shit about the WNBA till Caitlin Clark got there. Or more right, more specifically until Caitlin Clark and Angel Reese had a little non moment during that fucking college championship game that Caitlin lost. But anyway, it's about Caitlin Clark and how she is a problem in the same way that Taylor Swift is a problem where it's like, I knew that's what you're going to say because these bitches are running parallels. It's like you want all the benefits of having the super racist fan base because what they going to do is spend money on your ass. Okay, first and foremost, the dollars and the sense is going to always line up. And secondly, they are going to make sure that you never have to actually speak up and try to advocate or whatever for yourself because you got swarms of insane racist people ready to take up that cause for you. And so whether you personally believe in these things, like whether you're personally a fan of Donald Trump or racist or homophobic or transphobic or whatever else becomes more irrelevant because you're Letting these people use your name, your likeness, all of this, they're doing this harassment and in your name, Caitlyn. And you don't do shit about it. You do fuck all about it. You know good and goddamn well neither. You were not targeted in neither one of these plays. But you see how your fans act to take care of you, to protect you, to make sure that these terrible black women know how and why would you want to be so mean to Caitlyn and all. Rising tide lifts all boats and how dare you guys do all this when Caitlin just wants to make things better for everybody. Child, Caitlyn ain't looking out for nobod but her goddamn self. We can stop acting like she's so selfless and pure and just everything Caitlyn does is for the betterment of the league and blah, blah, blah, blah. She's not even that great. For y' all to be going this hard. Paige Beckers is right there.

[Crissle West]

I was literally about to say her

[Kid Fury]

name, but Paige is gay and gives black people they pride.

[Crissle West]

So that's why I was gonna bring her up.

[Kid Fury]

Sabrina. UNESCO is right there. But again, Sabrina, not racist. It's almost like y', all, you're. You're sticking hold to this one for a fucking reason. Marina Mabry, another straight white girl, but again, not racist. Kelsey Plum, another straight white girl, but again,

[Crissle West]

yeah.

[Kid Fury]

So it's you, Caitlyn. It's absolutely you and I. Again, I have not spoken a lot about her because I think too many people are talking about her. I would like for her name to be mentioned a lot fucking less. But when I saw a letter from God damn Congress, that's insane. Pressing Kathy over, making sure that Caitlin Clark is protected. I said, okay. Have y' all ever seen basketball that's unhinged like that?

[Crissle West]

Like, I was like, do these people watch basketball?

[Kid Fury]

It is a contact sport. People get fouled all the time. There are injuries all the time.

[Crissle West]

Niggas catch an elbow and fly across the crowd.

[Kid Fury]

Happens. The girls be having bloody noses and shit. It's every game, multiple times a game. Because this is a contact sport. These women are playing at the highest fucking level.

[Crissle West]

Yeah, they're professionals.

[Kid Fury]

It isn't flag football. This isn't toddlers lining up for T ball. This isn't. It's not even soccer. What do you want?

[Crissle West]

Racists are so boring.

[Kid Fury]

Like I said. Okay, Congress, of all the things y' all could be doing right now, we got doo doo all over the salads.

[Crissle West]

Thank you.

[Kid Fury]

Nobody can. If we could afford fresh fruit we couldn't eat it anyway because it's doo doo all over the. Okay. All right. Record heat waves. Children starving. Back to school is in, like, six weeks. Teachers still not being paid. Federal minimum wage is still $7. And y' all decided to write a letter to Kathy Engelbert about how are we going to make sure Caitlin Clark is protected, Girl, this country. And you want me to side with these niggas over Taco Bell? I don't fucking think so. Oh, insane. Insane. Anyway, I'm done,

[Crissle West]

all right? Agree with all of the above. I will keep mine short and sweet. My read this week is going out to an old bitch named Link Ocarina. No, you not Ivy potterboret Smith, girl. I don't. It's gonna be one more time. You finna go in my trash? It's gonna be one more time that you go into my trash, you black bitch. And I know that you're listening to this, so let me tell you something, ho. I'm sick and tired of your absolute bold black shenanigans. I don't give a fuck if I had a turkey stick before bed and put it in a trash can by me, girl. The whole thing. You had to pull all of the trash out of that fucking bin and spread it across the bedroom floor to get a turkey stick wrapper. Are you insane, bitch? And then the worst part about it is, okay, you wait until I'm asleep. You are not slick, bitch. I can't stand it. I can't stand it because you're sneaky and you think you sneaky and you're good at it because you know when I'm sleep. And you wait until I'm sleeping and then you launch your black ass into that goddamn garbage bin to go get anything that smells like food.

[Kid Fury]

Why was she.

[Crissle West]

Oh, man, sure, it's my fault. I probably should have just taken the shit out before I went to bed or whatever. I'm sleepy and I'm old. But that doesn't give you the goddamn right to be pilfering through my garbage, she said. Doesn't it, though, to get a wrapper, ho. It's empty. There's nothing in it. You saw me eat the turkey stick. I don't understand why we have to do this. And then what makes it even worse? By the time I wake up and see what happens, bitch, you gone. Daycare done already came and picked your ass up, so I can't even cuss you out.

[Kid Fury]

Damn.

[Crissle West]

And by the time you get home, I done already cleaned it. I can't Cuss you out then either. Cause you're not gonna know what the fuck I'm talking about.

[Kid Fury]

I know a daycare worker was like, oh, so you just be in here doing whatever the fuck you wanna do. Huh? She said, I smell turkey juice. And so I'm going for it. Sorry. Sorry. She deserves, though,

[Crissle West]

it's gonna be one more time that I step out of my bed.

[Kid Fury]

Oh, my God.

[Crissle West]

And my foot touches, like. I don't know, like, a latex glove or some shit that was in there. Like, why is this. One more? And I'm gonna. I'm putting you down. Put y'. All. I'm putting you down. Like, I'm tired of it. I'm tired of it. And then you're gonna come back home, cannonball your ass around this apartment like, oh, my God, I'm so happy to be here, dad. What's going on? And I have to just suck it up. Yeah. The alternative was that to that was letting that trash sitting on the bedroom floor.

[Kid Fury]

No.

[Crissle West]

Until you get home tonight.

[Kid Fury]

Yeah.

[Crissle West]

And that's what I should have done. You know, better. You won't do better. And I don't know who the fuck you think you are. I'm finished.

[Kid Fury]

If you had left the trash for her, she would have turned around and looked at you like, you not gonna pick this up? Dirty.

[Crissle West]

Literally. Literally. She would have come into the room and looked in the trash and then looked up at me like, yuck.

[Kid Fury]

All day.

[Crissle West]

So this is how you're living. Wow.

[Kid Fury]

And you really do have to correct them, like, in that moment. Cause they don't know what you're talking about three minutes later.

[Crissle West]

So you have to get three minutes later. What are. What is going on?

[Kid Fury]

Right.

[Crissle West]

So you made a mess. I don't understand what you were mad at me for.

[Kid Fury]

So in her mind, it's like you're pissed out of nowhere. I didn't do shit. I didn't do fucking shit.

[Crissle West]

All I've done is be perfect and adorable and friendly.

[Kid Fury]

So not her going in the trash, though. Laney never leaves my side at night. I think I would if I woke up and saw some shit like that. Like, what was you feeling like, Link?

[Crissle West]

No matter what, whether I'm awake, sleep, she always comes into the bedroom, leaps her ass up on the bed. Remember I told you not long ago, she can't jump on a bed. Like, lies, manipulation. Complete lies and manipulation.

[Kid Fury]

I was just hiding it, saving it for a rainy day.

[Crissle West]

So she will be curled up like, not by me all the time. Don't care yeah, but it's when she gets up and I'm still asleep. It's over.

[Kid Fury]

Yeah, it's over. Yeah. I can't even move. Lainey be like, oh, we're awake. Are we awake? I'm like, wow. I was trying to rearrange myself, but I guess we are. Girl. Hey, girl.

[Crissle West]

Yeah.

[Kid Fury]

Oh, damn.

[Crissle West]

She got on my nerves. Yeah. Yeah, my fault.

[Kid Fury]

Well, I mean.

[Crissle West]

And I mean, she's a dog. She smells turkey stick, right?

[Kid Fury]

It's your fault.

[Crissle West]

What is she supposed to fucking do? Act like she doesn't smell it?

[Kid Fury]

Every time Lainey does something, I think about how I set myself up for this.

[Crissle West]

Literally, one time, I found a starburst in her bed, and I was like, bro, I lose a fender.

[Kid Fury]

Okay. At least she didn't eat it. Cause Lainey would have fucked it up. But. So next time, I guess you'll take that meat trash out to the chute where it belongs.

[Crissle West]

Sure will. Get your high dumb ass up and throw this trash away, you pet. Girl, girl, all the trash. I'm like, how? Like the whole thing?

[Kid Fury]

Yep. Just to piss you off.

[Crissle West]

Oh.

[Kid Fury]

All right. That is gonna wrap up this week's episode of the Read. Make sure you check us out on social media. Hisistheread. My advice, show. Whatever it's called, call it Coco. No. Chris Couch out now. Talking to more of you live this week at Chrysalis Couch for more information and links and etc. Any other news from you? It's Jackie Washington Day. I need to go watch that movie.

[Crissle West]

Sure is, bitch. It needs to be in the Criterion Collection

[Kid Fury]

to get on that first.

[Crissle West]

Yes, that's a fact. You can check out my podcast Furious Thoughts on your podcast platforms as well as on YouTube. Shout out to Dexter Carr, choreographer, dancer, and Dade county doll like myself. He's on the pod with me this week. Go check that out. Also, 305 Live has returned. We're getting our summer party on before summering ends. So, Los Angeles, if you would like to attend the fantastic and surely uproarious ghetto time that is 305 live. Go to my Instagram bio right now. You can find tickets for it. It's going down on August 9th, so you have time to grab tickets. And I can't wait to see you all there. That's it, I think. Yeah.

[Kid Fury]

All right. Take care of yourselves, y'. All. We will see you next week.

[Crissle West]

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