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Kid Fury
Prime day is June 23rd through the 26th. These deals are so appealing, like portable steamers for steaming.
Crissle West
Whoa. Did I just sing soprano? I think I'm breaking into so epic deals on air fryers, vacuums, and skincare, I can't stop. Sing shop Epic deals this prime day, June 23rd through the 26th.
Kid Fury
Ooh, I think that's it.
Crissle West
No. Nope. There's more luggage. Smart glasses. Early birds always rise to the occasion for summer vacation planning because early gets you closer to the action. So don't be late. Book your next vacation early on VRBO and save over $120. Rise and shine. Average savings, $141 select homes only. Now streaming on Paramount plus is the acclaimed series from executive producer Lena Waithe and the final chapter of the Shy Now, y'. All. For the past seven seasons, these style stories, this community, these streets have stayed with us. We've grown so attached. But now it all leads to this. As friendships are tested, families evolve, and secrets refuse to stay buried, one thing will remain certain. The Shy is more than just a series. It's a legacy. So don't miss the final season of the Shy now streaming on the Paramount plus premium plan.
Kid Fury
Happy. Well, how you doing, folks? Welcome back to this Mid Pride podcast. My name is Kel Mitchell.
Crissle West
And I am Skylar Diggins, and this is the Read. Thank you for joining us.
Kid Fury
It is, in fact, the Read. And thank you for joining us. It's June. It's the middle of 2026. Don't know how so quickly, but here we are, yet aging on this rotted rock where there is still a land of opportunity, of peace. And you make your own happiness in this shithole, because life is about being positive and about being optimistic, even though we're floating around on a burning rock of hell. So keep those smiles on Happy Pride. Let's start.
Crissle West
Okay. Why not?
Kid Fury
I mean, yeah, I'm having a great day. I mean, I'm not even in a shit mood or depressed. Isn't the world awful? Like, isn't it?
Crissle West
Yeah. And we, you know. And here we are. Anyway, here we are making it happen.
Kid Fury
Anyway, I'm so glad that. Actually, I'll save that for. For the read. It's mostly petty.
Crissle West
Okay, love that.
Kid Fury
Let's start with positivity in a segment that we call Black Excellence. Of course, this week, I'm giving Black Black Excellence to none other than Queen Jean. Queen Gene is the first openly transgender person to win a Tony, period. She just won a Tony for best costume design of a musical. And that was for Cats, the Jellicle Ball, which actually ate up at the Tonys. I watched it, and I had a really good time.
Crissle West
Yeah, the Tonys were fun.
Kid Fury
They were fun. And I think Cat's the Jellicle Ball also got best direction of a. Of a musical. That acceptance speech made me cry because one of the directors said something like to the. To the 12 year old.
Crissle West
Oh, yes.
Kid Fury
Watching this alone with the. With the volume turned down. Come find your home at the Jellicum Ball. I didn't even expect to get emotional about that. And then I was like, are there tears coming out of my head? I thought that was so sweet.
Crissle West
It really was. That was a very touching moment.
Kid Fury
So congratulations to everybody over there at Catch the Jellicle Ball for getting your deserved wins.
Crissle West
Yes. And before we move on, I have to say thank you so much to them for inviting me to the Jellicle Ball. I got to go. I have seen it now for myself. Shout out to everybody who was like, don't worry about, you know, the plot or character development. Cause it don't really do all that. You know, it's Cats. We know you don't know Cats, but you don't need to know cats. Like, vibes when they. Right before the show started, there was somebody who works for the theater, was selling fans just right there in the audience.
Kid Fury
The yellow ones.
Crissle West
Oh, yeah. Mine is right here.
Kid Fury
Yeah.
Crissle West
I said, oh, I did not realize that. I mean, and I should have known because it's a ball. Like, I would have brought my own fan had I thought about it. But, yes, I will spend $30 on yalls fan. And we had a good time. We had a great time, actually. So it very well deserved. I'm glad they racked up and, you know, won so much. But definitely. Yeah. It's just so good to see black queer people, you know, on stage doing their damn thing and being recognized for it. So thank you so much. Yes. I mean, and it is a ball. It is a ball. It's.
Kid Fury
Yeah, it's a ball.
Crissle West
It's cats. But a ball.
Kid Fury
Yeah.
Crissle West
All the people who are like, I'm going during Pride. I'm going in June. I'm like, oh, I get it. I do. I get it. Y' all gonna be extra gay this month.
Kid Fury
And unlike that movie with Taylor Swift, you know why these cats have titties? Because it's a ball and it's not real cats.
Crissle West
It was the nipples. But, yes, thank you all so much for extending the invitation. I had a grand old time.
Kid Fury
Okay, let's get into our hot top section, pop culture and things going on in the world. I'm going to start with. I'm going to start with pastor and prophetess Ms. Rachel of YouTube Baptist first step on Mount Zion Church.
Crissle West
Okay. Okay, work.
Kid Fury
Ms. Rachel partnered with New Jersey Senator Andy Kim and visited New Jersey's Delaney hall to sing with the children of detained parents.
Crissle West
Oh, wow.
Kid Fury
Delaney Hall's immigration detention center has basically held several families separate.
Crissle West
Yes.
Kid Fury
There's lots of kids there with their parents being detained. And it's ridiculous and heartbreaking. And we have been shouting into the rafters about this fuckery for a while. And I was a little bit surprised, I don't know how many weeks or months ago when I heard that, you know, MAGA conservatives, folks on the right apparently hate Ms. Rachel because she has the nerve of saying, hey, children should live and have health and life and families.
Crissle West
Yep. They are really pissed off about that.
Kid Fury
What an evil wretch, huh?
Crissle West
The worst woman in the world. Ms. Rachel.
Kid Fury
Okay, so Ms. Rachel was out in New Jersey sitting down with these kids and giving them some much needed love music and her signature overalls and pink crewneck. So I wanted to say shout out to Ms. Rachel, feet on necks.
Crissle West
Yeah, she. I just love that she does not care how mad y' all get about it. She's gonna keep saying that she advocates for children first and foremost and it does not matter what those kids look like.
Kid Fury
Yeah.
Crissle West
So, yeah, I mean, she obviously is not, you know, shoving no little white babies off of a cliff or nothing, but she's. She's not going to act like Palestinian children deserve to die or that ICE is valid in snatching parents away from their kids. Like, this is insane what this country is doing. So shout out to Ms. Rachel using her privilege to do a good thing. More rich white people should do the same.
Kid Fury
Child Zahara has reportedly filed to remove Pitt from her last name.
Crissle West
Oh, yes, the other one did, too.
Kid Fury
Third Jolie Pittchild to do so. They are over gragging. They hate her.
Crissle West
I mean, and they're grown. So Zahara and Shiloh and the boy, too, right, Maddox? Yeah, all three of them, I think, are grown at this point. So they said I didn't have to pick a side. I have chosen to pick a side. That man terrorized me and I don't want his name on mine. No, we hate him.
Kid Fury
So. Yeah, but we knew that time in Hollywood. Fuck that man, right?
Crissle West
The shit y' all just now finding out about, you know, him screaming at her on that PJ or whatever. Like, that's the tip of the iceberg, I'm sure of what those kids have seen first and foremost. But I remember when Angelina, when. When she went to Zahara's, AKA probate, and Zahara was going by Zahara Jolie then she was like, you know, don't call me that pit bullshit. So just making it legal now.
Kid Fury
Only pit I recognize is that critically acclaimed medical drama on the home box office.
Crissle West
That show is stressful.
Kid Fury
It is intense,
Crissle West
but it's the one that all the healthcare workers are like. That is the most realistic of all of the hospital shows. That is the worst. Not Scrubs, not er, not Grays.
Kid Fury
This is it, the pit.
Crissle West
This is what it's like.
Kid Fury
Hell, I could tell the first, When I watched the first episode, I was like, I don't work in like a medical emergency unit. I'm not a doctor, obviously, nurse, none of that. But I can tell that this is right on the money when it comes to being in those spaces, working in those spaces. Because even visiting a hospital or a doctor's office, right? Understaffed, overworked, booked and too busy, no sleep, swollen feet, like, and patients constantly passing out bad news.
Crissle West
Oh, yes, you are the bad news bear.
Kid Fury
Yeah, that show is so crazy because they never, like, none of them ever get a chance to breathe. The fact that every episode is like an hour in the same.
Crissle West
In the er. But yeah, if you. It's like when you go to the er, you, you realize that, like, what these people are putting up with. Like, yes, I'm irritated that, you know, I have a long wait in the er, even though I know that means that I'm relatively stable or whatever else. However, other patients be trying the fuck out of my patients. Like the other people in the ER getting on my nerves, the other critical ill people. I can't imagine being a doctor or nurs and having to give a fuck about these people. I would be like, if you don't like it, please sign the paperwork and roll your ass right on out of here, bitch. Like, I don't care. I'm not finna sit here and argue back and forth with you about it. And you not finna talk to me crazy either. Like, I just would have so many more people would die under my watch.
Kid Fury
So first of all, I went to the hospital here in LA. It was legitimately like, oh, yeah, Mr. Such and Such in whatever room is out and he's walking the halls with no pants on so someone could go grab him.
Crissle West
That would be great.
Kid Fury
And get him back to where he Is. That would be fantastic. It's literally that. So no, thanks. Let's see here. Teyana Taylor is going to receive the Icon of the Year award at this year's BET Award Festivation.
Crissle West
Good. You know what? Well deserved.
Kid Fury
Yeah. Connie Orlando of BET said, Teyana Taylor is the embodiment of what it means to be an icon in this moment. She doesn't ask for a seat at the table. She builds the table, designs the rooms, and sets the tone for everyone who walks in. I mean, Mama just won a Golden Globe for her role in that movie One Battle After Another, which I was delighted to see a clip of Tyreek Withers, the light skinned boy from him.
Crissle West
Yep.
Kid Fury
I was delighted to see him in like a press junket for another movie. Comparing that movie to Finding Nemo. He's like, Finding Nemo in one battle after another of the same movie. And then he broke it down and I'm like, oh, my God, they are absolutely the same movie.
Crissle West
Wow. Okay. I mean, I never saw one battle, but okay.
Kid Fury
If you just like look over a quick summary of the plot of. Of one battle after another, you will go, oh, wow. This is Finding Nemo.
Crissle West
He lost his daughter and he's trying to get her back, but she's on a big.
Kid Fury
He loses his wife, the mother of this child. He's completely like, incapable of really looking after the kid, but is also like, very paranoid. Don't want the kid to go out nowhere. Don't leave too far from the house. Cause the world is whack and the child's like, girl, you are so trash. And bitch, you don't even know what the fuck you're talking about. I'm gonna go do. And then gets like, lost. And then the daddy is like, oh, shit, I have to go and save my baby. Lord God, I don't know where they at or how to go get them. And then meets this, like, very slow, like. Anyways, I'm explaining Alfred to people at home because you don't know what I'm talking about.
Crissle West
I don't.
Kid Fury
But it is the exact same movie.
Crissle West
Hilarious. Love that.
Kid Fury
Anyway, back to. What was your name in the movie? Perdita? I don't remember what her name was. It was something wild. Her snippet. Teyana Taylor in this movie.
Crissle West
Oh, I was about to say, nobody named Perdita in Finding Nemo. I could tell you that much.
Kid Fury
Yeah, I think there's someone named Perdita in 101 Dalmatians. Isn't that what the dogs. The mom dog. Perfidia.
Crissle West
Perfidia Beverly Hills. Really?
Kid Fury
There it is.
Crissle West
That's her name. Perfidia Beverly Hills. Really?
Kid Fury
It's awful. I think it's like a fake name because she's a. I mean, like the character is a freedom fighter. So I think that she just. Yeah, but I. I don't know. There was no explanation that I caught in the film. And Perdita is actually the name of the mama. Oh, I was 101 dimensions.
Crissle West
Mm. That makes sense.
Kid Fury
Great parents. Perdita was so classy. She was like, I'm gonna have all 101 of these damn kids and I'm gonna take care of them. And my baby daddy finna take care of them too.
Crissle West
I barely.
Kid Fury
And when they get kidnapped, we want them back. Let me tell you something. If I had 101 kids and somebody took them, well. Yeah, life goes on. I wish them the best.
Crissle West
I feel like you could take 80 of mine before I start to even notice, girl. 101, girl. Yeah, go. Only take a good 80. 90 of them kids, actually. Cause what am I even finna do with all them damn puppies?
Kid Fury
Yeah, yeah, you take Roli first. Always hungry. Don't nobody have all of that. So cute, Auntie Howe.
Crissle West
Oh, but good for Teyana. She's had a crazy year, so I love that for her.
Kid Fury
And she's still so young and so incredibly talented. I'm very interested in seeing what like the next 10 years or her will be like.
Crissle West
Yeah.
Kid Fury
Apparently Ms. Lauryn Hill will also be getting an award of the BET Awards Living Legend Icon Award. Also appropriate given the title and the person. The show was June 28th at 8. So hopefully they told her that the show is on June 26th at 1. So she.
Crissle West
Cause you know how she.
Kid Fury
Actually, I haven't heard anything about Lauryn Hill being late for things in a while, but I also haven't heard any much about Lauryn Hill being present.
Crissle West
Right. I was gonna say, was she. Has she supposed to been anywhere lately?
Kid Fury
Right.
Crissle West
Oh, man. Okay. Yeah, we'll see if she shows up. The BET Awards look good. Well, the promo for the BET Awards is funny, which makes me think the show is. It's Drew Ski going around the different celebrities telling them to come to the BET Awards. Like I've seen one with Jamie Foxx and one with Cardi B. So if the. Since the promo is funny, it has me feeling like the show itself is going to be funny. Drew Ski is hilarious. So.
Kid Fury
Yeah, he's hosting.
Crissle West
Yeah. So we will see.
Kid Fury
Yeah, we'll see. At the very least, I Can I can see his award banter and bits being funny if he's given the time and space to actually come up with that.
Crissle West
Right, right, right.
Kid Fury
Because we know that she'll get into the full Martin Lawrence draggery.
Crissle West
I was about to say, if she come out in that Eric. If he come out in that Erica Kirk dragon.
Kid Fury
If he comes out in that Erica Kirk drag, I might sign up for BET just off gp.
Crissle West
I actually need it. I actually need it. You gotta start the show in the Erika Kirk drag and then go take a shower and get all that shit
Kid Fury
off of you and come down out of the ceiling like pink and start
Crissle West
doing spins and shit with the pyrotechnics in the background.
Kid Fury
Oh, my God, I need it like I need air.
Crissle West
Yeah.
Kid Fury
Speaking of Cardi B, she performed at the halftime show for Game 3 of the NBA Finals. The New York Knicks and the San Antonio Spurs. This was the game where the Knicks heavily lost.
Crissle West
Okay, all right. You have to say it like that.
Kid Fury
There's. There's plenty of time left. And everyone blames Donald Trump, including.
Crissle West
That's part of my read this week, so.
Kid Fury
Mine too. Delicious.
Crissle West
Love that. Because anyway, it's that fun.
Kid Fury
But anyway, so she performed Bodega Baddie and Bodak Yellow. The only reason I'm bringing this up because I didn't see much of the. The performance. I saw clips of it and it looked, you know, cute. And Nick's like, orange, blue, whatever. Charles Barkley, my God, did you hear this old ass dad joke he told about this lady's titties?
Crissle West
I did. He. You know, sometimes you just have to pretend your uncle is not sitting right there. Like you just have. I said, boy, you ain't never been worried about losing your job, huh? Like you just ain't never once thought, damn, I might get in trouble for this.
Kid Fury
It's Charles Barkley, Shaquille o', Neal, Draymond Green.
Crissle West
Oh, God.
Kid Fury
Some other niggas, Ernie Johnson. I don't know who else was there, but after her performance in the halftime show, Charles Barkley, go say, I don't know if those B's. Those might be Cardi D's, right, Charles?
Crissle West
So corny. That is so corny, Charles. Like that.
Kid Fury
It just.
Crissle West
You're like 70. What are you doing?
Kid Fury
That was so cheesy. Anyhow, right? Like I said, them absolutely lost.
Crissle West
And okay, not too much.
Kid Fury
And Donald Trump was, quote, thunderously booed, according to something I read on the cnn. And then I watched clips of it, and he was thunderously booed inside and outside.
Crissle West
Yes.
Kid Fury
Is that a part of the reto?
Crissle West
Well, no, not that part. I felt sorry for Avery Wilson, who sounded beautiful. Avery Wilson has a gorgeous voice. Um, so. And some. So I don't know that this is true, but I saw on TikTok that they invited Avery Wilson because every time he sung the anthem for the Knicks, they've won. So, yeah, they were just kind of, you know, feeding into everybody's superstitions about
Kid Fury
the game and, you know, their lucky charm.
Crissle West
Right. And so. But, you know, Trump cancels out good energy. So I would say every time. First and foremost, I'm sorry to Avery Wilson that you had to hear that, but, you know, New Yorkers was not booing you. You know that.
Kid Fury
I don't know what that is.
Crissle West
You sounded beautiful. But also it. On tv, on the broadcast, you could definitely hear the boos, but it also sounded like a pretty decent number of cheers, too. But then when you. But when you look at people's clips who were in the Garden, it's way more.
Kid Fury
Yeah.
Crissle West
So, like, did. Did ABC do that? Or, like. Cause it just. It sounds different. I'm just saying.
Kid Fury
It does sound different.
Crissle West
It's way booier in other people's video.
Kid Fury
That's true. Because the first clip that I looked up or saw of it was like an iPhone thing from someone in an actual seat.
Crissle West
Right.
Kid Fury
And it did sound like most of your.
Crissle West
Yeah.
Kid Fury
But then when I saw footage that was like, I'm assuming the NBA camera, microphone or whatever in the. In the Madison Square, and it was like close up of him with his stupid rotting hand up to his head. It did sound a little bit different.
Crissle West
He is.
Kid Fury
The goofy smirk on his face, like he knew it was gonna happen. He's just trolling. Cause he's like, either I'm gonna not be the president soon, or I'm gonna be dead, so let me just make these people's lives as miserable as possible. Until then. I saw some reporter. I can't remember what network or whatever this was on, but someone said that Madison Square Garden knew that he was gonna get booed once he was on the Jumbotron, so they tried to show him during the National Anthem because they thought people wouldn't do it then.
Crissle West
Yeah, you thought wrong.
Kid Fury
And I was like, why did they think that?
Crissle West
Well, I mean, I was a little surprised to happily surprised because I said, this is the. These are the richest people in New York. They probably love Trump. And that whole lower bowl was just a sea of white people. And then any color was a celebrity. Like, yeah, it was just nothing but the wealthiest white people in the Tri State area.
Kid Fury
So I was like, it's for $200,000.
Crissle West
This is what I'm saying. Like the ticket, the nosebleeds were 10k. So you either already have a season ticket and so you a die hard fan, you've been a, you, you a Spike Lee type of nigga, and you've just been watching the team for decades, or you have an insane amount of money and you went to this game. So I was like, I don't know, super rich people kind of love him. So I said, damn, it's gotta be bad when even the ultra wealthy in New York City are like, boo, get that bitch outta here and take your shitty ass granddaughter with you. Like, girl, fucking up the vibes. But anyway, we'll get to that.
Kid Fury
Yeah, I don't know what the fuck they were thinking about over there, but yes, also shout out to Avery Wilson. You were Sing Sing.
Crissle West
And, and that should be noted work, Avery.
Kid Fury
That should be noted. Even the folks who didn't know it was you were like, well, whoever that is is up there blowing through all of this. Like, that should, that should be considered in the heat of things. But you know what? Nicky's. Ooh, different name. Nick's. Nick Nickel's. Nicole's. Yeah, I saw Nick is said that he was rooting for the knickers and I was like, yeah, that's great.
Crissle West
Not too much.
Kid Fury
Now, I don't want to take this joke, but, yeah, I hope you all win. I love this for you.
Crissle West
Okay.
Kid Fury
No, I'm so serious. Like, yeah, they haven't been in the finals since I was like nine.
Crissle West
Yeah, it's been a very long time since they have even made it this far. And you know, we'll, I, we'll get, we'll.
Kid Fury
I love how much fun the city's having.
Crissle West
The city, that's the thing. Like, are we gonna talk about this now? We're gonna talk about it later. Cause I'm like, well, okay, we'll wait.
Kid Fury
We'll wait.
Crissle West
Okay, okay, okay.
Kid Fury
Howdy, folks. This podcast is being brought to you by Squarespace, my favorite spaces. With Squarespace, everything you need to succeed online is in one spot. I still have quite a few friends who hit me up who are like, I'm starting this thing. I have this idea. I need a website or I don't know how to build a website. I promise you, every single time I direct them to Squarespace because it's so, so easy to make a good looking website that pretty much can showcase anything that you have to offer. Also, you can claim your domain to build a beautiful website so you don't have to worry about getting your.com or.net or TV. You can promote your work directly from there. You can take payments. It's all there. Whether you're just starting out or you're getting ready to grow. Evolve from a blossom into whatever blossom evolves into. I don't remember. Easily create a standout site or designer templates with drag and drop editing and flexible design options. No experience needed. It's so easy I can't stress it enough. They also let you offer services, but clients get paid all in one place with scheduling invoices and email tools built in. I use Squarespace for my website kifury.com if you want to go over there right now you can see how sexy it is to get a good idea of what they have to offer you here. It's really, really easy. It's always easy to update and I like that it can look all pretty and unique while also being incredibly easy to manage. So if you're Interested, go to squarespace.com theread for a free trial and when you're ready to launch, use offer code theread1word to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or a domain. Go get started. You know you want to let them know that we sent you this episode
Crissle West
of the RE is brought to you by Chime. Chime is changing the way people bank with fee free banking built for you. No overdraft or monthly fees, thousands of fee free ATMs and members can benefit from up to $1,150 in annual rewards. With a Chime card you get 5% cash back in a category of choice like gas or groceries and savings that grow faster with a 3.75% APY that's nine times higher than the national average. Chime is not just smarter banking, it is the most rewarding way to bank. So join the millions who are already banking fee free today. Head to chime.com theread that's chime.com theread it only takes a few minutes to sign up. Chime is a fintech not a bank. Banking services for Chime card provided by Chime's bank Partners. Optional products and services may have fees or charges, stated annual percentage yield and cash back for Chime prime only. No minimum balance required. For more information on APY rates go to chime.com disclosures so Offset has had
Kid Fury
a Chris Brown like episode recently. Remember that one time like A good one. I'm sorry. Yeah.
Crissle West
Cause he's okay. Cause I was like, what happened?
Kid Fury
Remember that one time where Diddy Sons was, like, trying to jump Ray J or something? And Chris Brown was like, no, give peace a chance.
Crissle West
Yeah.
Kid Fury
We were like, Christopher Maurice Brown, like,
Crissle West
Jonathan Majors broke up that fight outside of In N Out.
Kid Fury
Well, So Offset was. Where was. Was he in Paris? He was in Monaco.
Crissle West
Oh, who's $. Sorry. Just wondering where he get money from. Who paid for that? Sorry, sorry, sorry. He was in Monaco.
Kid Fury
Okay. My chest. All right. He was in Monaco and nearly came to blows with a chauffeur. Um. The video shows Offset confronting the driver because this man allegedly was manhandling a group of women who were also, I guess, waiting to get a ride or something. So, according to Offset and a couple of witnesses, this driver was aggressive in, like, grabbing women by, like, their neck or the collar by their neck. Video didn't show that part, not from what I saw. But what I did see is Offset very aggressively approaching this man and threatening to beat his ass, saying, you touching women. You putting your hands on women. You a bitch. And saying, if he grabbed one more girl like that, I'mma beat him the fuck up. And at one point, it seemed like a man who was with him. I don't know if this was his friend or what, but a man who was. Was, like, in the group, grabbed this driver and like, tossed him to the ground. They were not with the shit. And I. I kind of believe that this man did touch some woman inappropriately or aggressively, because everyone around this person seemed like they were on the same page. One guy, I think the person who was recording the thing, or maybe someone nearby went off and was like, I'm gonna beat him the fuck up if you touch one more girl. The guy was like, it ain't worth it, bro. Just. It's just. And ultimately, it isn't worth it. Offset.
Crissle West
Yeah.
Kid Fury
Booty cheek's still healing. Nonstop drama.
Crissle West
You got a lot going on.
Kid Fury
Yeah, you got a lot going on.
Crissle West
Forgot about it.
Kid Fury
Let that other man take care of it.
Crissle West
But I do like that. Yeah, right. I'm pleasantly shocked. Same. I would have never thought Offset would take up for a woman like that. I would have never thought it.
Kid Fury
Maybe the butt shot shot is like, nope, nope. You never know. Maybe, like, rewires.
Crissle West
It doesn't.
Kid Fury
It was like, oh, I got back shot. So now I really understand the plight
Crissle West
of, Dear God, make me a bird.
Kid Fury
I am a bird. Yeah. So I watched this, and I was like, oh, this reminds Me of the time. That other problematic nigga was like, in the streets, like Batman that one time
Crissle West
Chris Brown did a good thing. Yes. And stopped a fight from getting worse. I do remember that. Right. Um, okay, well, good for him. And you know what? If this starts a long chain of offset doing good things, then so fucking be it. You know, maybe. Maybe he telling that therapist the truth now and shit is finna turn around. Like, maybe he really finna do the work.
Kid Fury
That would be so fun.
Crissle West
That would be fun.
Kid Fury
If he's like, plot twist. I got shot. I owe way too many people money. I'll take the meds.
Crissle West
Yeah.
Kid Fury
I'm gonna take. I will just go ahead and take the medications.
Crissle West
I'm stay out that casino. I'm gonna leave rappers alone. I'm gonna FaceTime my kids at least once a week. You know, little shit making. Making big changes. That's good.
Kid Fury
I would love that.
Crissle West
Yeah, that would be beautiful.
Kid Fury
Oh, this was only the Zahara name change was only a few days after Maddox.
Crissle West
Yeah, that's what I'm saying. I feel like. No, I feel like both of them kids just back to back was like, yeah, gonna get that nigga out of here.
Kid Fury
Well, yeah. Sir Idris Elba. Because, you know, he's a sir now. I do got, like, knighted and shit, which is cute for him. You know, now we call him Sir Idris or whatever. You know, people have been talking about wanting him to play James Bond forever and ever and ever. We're past that. He's past that.
Crissle West
Okay.
Kid Fury
Because he said in realistic terms, some markets just don't go for that black Bond. He said Bond is big all over the world, and audiences won't go for a black male and African male playing Bond. That's not what they like in their culture, period. So he's continued or maintained that he's flattered by people and their desire to see him play the role. But he's also like, it's never gonna happen. Like, white men who love white men are Bond fans. They're not interested, but shout out to y'. All. He also said, Bond is so unrealistic. So a hint of reality is good, but let's not try and make it woke up. I think you've got to be pure to what it is. Escapism. Don't try to answer the world's taste. Just be Bond. Didn't care. Like, I don't care for the wording of that.
Crissle West
Yeah, yeah.
Kid Fury
But I don't disagree.
Crissle West
Right. I think that's exactly where I am with it. Like, Weird way to. You said that in a very incel. Maggot, you know, right wing podcast kind of way.
Kid Fury
You know, the incels love this quote.
Crissle West
Right? Right. I bet they are eating that shit up. Like they're eating it one of the Tyrones. He gets it.
Kid Fury
Yes.
Crissle West
So it is. But I mean, he is also pretty clearly saying racism is keeping me from playing this role. Everybody wants me to do it, but this is a money business first and foremost. And if they feel like they not gonna make, you know, hundreds of millions of dollars, then they not gonna make this movie. So it's like, damn. Feel like y' all are skipping right over the way he's calling you out. Like it's your own biases. Like. But all right. I mean, you're not. You're not wrong is the thing. You didn't say one single thing that was incorrect about that. So.
Kid Fury
Yeah. Also, I've watched many James Bond films. I much like Indiana Jones and I've always loved the, like, the action Y element to it. They often kill Nazis, so that's fun. But they're also like, campy in the way that they deal with love, women.
Crissle West
Oh, yeah, silly.
Kid Fury
That whole aspect. Drinking, smoking. So it's. Especially with Ian Fleming's James Bond stories, it's so ingrained into the character that he's this like, womanizing, sexy. I do what I want, I go against the rules, bitch, don't tell me nothing and I'm gonna blow this up character. That's what they like about it. The minute that you make James Bond, Jane Bond or Asian or black. Those white men who want to see a sexy white man are like, no, they do. That's what they want.
Crissle West
They do. They want it bad.
Kid Fury
So I agree that Idris seemed to be like, look too racist, never gonna happen. But I think you might as well just let them do what they want to over there, cuz they're gonna want to make money. And to be honest with you, if you don't, do they want. We all have to deal with hearing millions of people bitch. So just call Jacob Elordi or whoever and let's get this shit moving. Can you imagine?
Crissle West
No. Well, I could see Jacob Elordi over at Timothee Chalamet, but yeah, I actually could imagine him in that role. 1 100%. I could see it. Yes, I could. So damn. All right.
Kid Fury
I mean, some people are saying Henry Cavill is being rumored for it and I'm like, they're never giving me to Henry Cavill. Cause wasn't he in no, he wasn't in James Bond. He was in, like, a Mission Impossible movie.
Crissle West
Oh, he looks like a. He looks like a Bond, too. He was in man of Steel. He's.
Kid Fury
Yeah, he was Superman for a while.
Crissle West
Okay. Damn. So you've kind of already.
Kid Fury
Well, yeah, he could do James Bond.
Crissle West
Yeah. Bond is not a superhero. Right.
Kid Fury
Mm. Mm. Is this a hot guy with gadgets?
Crissle West
Is he openly gay or something? Why wouldn't they him?
Kid Fury
Oh, no. Cause I just think that it seems like one of those roles that's too much of a layup. Like, too easy. Even Idris. Idris would have been an amazing Bond. Let's be completely honest.
Crissle West
Right.
Kid Fury
But it also feels like black, but also, ugh, too easy. Let's gag the set. So.
Crissle West
Got you.
Kid Fury
And like I said, I'm pretty sure he was in another super spy movie not that long ago, so they might skip over him for that.
Crissle West
Okay.
Kid Fury
Also not British. Don't know what his British accent sounds like because, you know, Bond is also supposed to be Brit. Am I six?
Crissle West
Well, you know, what I'm seeing here on Wikipedia is that he is British, but he's from Jersey. Huh. Henry Cavill. I think he's also British.
Kid Fury
He's like 21 Savage.
Crissle West
Yeah, well, no, I think 21 Savage was at least born over there, wasn't he?
Kid Fury
I didn't. Oh, wait, he does have an accent,
Crissle West
huh, doesn't he?
Kid Fury
I haven't heard him speak as himself in a while.
Crissle West
I actually Iceman up. You know, I did not know who that was.
Kid Fury
Oh, he's so very handsome. He's like. He's like. If you watch like a cartoon or something in the 90s, and it was like the hot white man. It's like he looks like that.
Crissle West
Yeah. Ooh. This one. He kind of looked like Gaston without the huge titties.
Kid Fury
Yes.
Crissle West
Yeah, okay. Yes, I see it. I see it.
Kid Fury
Such a good comparison. He absolutely looks like Gaston.
Crissle West
Yeah.
Kid Fury
Um, but, yeah, he. I didn't. I don't think I knew that he was British. Or maybe I fucking forgot. When did he move here?
Crissle West
Because I remember that he was born in Jersey. That's what I'm saying. I think his parents are British, but he was born here, so he.
Kid Fury
Jersey born. Mother. Right, okay. Okay.
Crissle West
Yeah.
Kid Fury
Father was born in England. Anyway, he could probably do it then.
Crissle West
Right, Right.
Kid Fury
Your daddy has an accent. You could probably just pull that off, huh?
Crissle West
Yeah.
Kid Fury
Oh, yeah.
Crissle West
He wasn't Scottish, English and Irish, so that's kind of all of them countries over there.
Kid Fury
So, yeah, I would like to See it? Yeah, I wouldn't be mad at that. Anything over Jacob Lord, He. I'm sorry, I don't buy it.
Crissle West
You don't like Nick Jacobs? No. Oh, I think he's cute.
Kid Fury
You know what I just remembered? Jacob Lordy is gang now. Because someone asked him what his favorite video game was and he said Kingdom Hearts. So are cousins.
Crissle West
All right.
Kid Fury
That was when I was like, that's the only thing. We cool now.
Crissle West
That's all.
Kid Fury
You know, when Hollywood, like, pumps out, a white person is like, oh, my God, impossibly fine. Don't we all want to have sex with this person? Oh, God, let's give them all the roles and we be looking at them like, no, that person looks perfectly fine. I feel like I walked past a million of them on Amsterdam Avenue or whatever. But. Well, that's how I feel about Jacob Elordi.
Crissle West
Yeah. I'm not trying to be too racist, but a whole lot of these white men look alike. In fact, you could possibly put Jacob Elordi and then Henry Cavill down the street walking just right, one right behind the other, and I might get confused. Sorry.
Kid Fury
Now that's a.
Crissle West
Sorry. Sorry. I don't look at faces that close.
Kid Fury
You don't know them. Okay, yeah. Maybe if just their floating heads were passing. Harry Cavill is a cyber truck of a man. That man is an F350.
Crissle West
Yeah. He has nice arms.
Kid Fury
He has nice everything. That man is huge.
Crissle West
Okay.
Kid Fury
I'm just saying, like, you like?
Crissle West
No. Cause I mean, this shit,
Kid Fury
there is no Nate Jacobs.
Crissle West
Cannot compare.
Kid Fury
It's just not going to happen.
Crissle West
Okay. You got it.
Kid Fury
That's gonna be it for my hot tops this week.
Crissle West
Amen.
Kid Fury
Yeah. So we're gonna take a break and then we're gonna come read your business. Howdy, folks. This podcast is being brought to you by Squarespace. My favorite space is with Squarespace. Everything you need to succeed online is in one spot. I still have quite a few friends who hit me up who are like, I'm starting this thing. I have this idea. I need a website. Or I don't know how to build a website. I promise you, every single time I direct them to Squarespace because it's so, so easy to make a good looking website that pretty much can showcase anything that you have to offer. Also, you can claim your domain to build a beautiful website so you don't have to worry about getting your.com or.net or TV. You can promote your work directly from there. You can take payments. It's all there. Whether you're just starting out or you're getting ready to grow. Evolve from a blossom into whatever blossom evolves into. I don't remember. Easily create a standout site or designer templates with drag and drop editing and flexible design options. No experience needed. It's so easy I can't stress it enough. They also let you offer services, book clients, get paid all in one place with scheduling invoices and email tools built in. I use Squarespace for my website kifuri.com if you want to go over there right now you can see how sexy it is to get a good idea of what they have to offer you here. It's really, really easy. It's always easy to update and I like that it can look all pretty and unique while also being incredibly easy to manage. So if you're Interested, go to squarespace.com theread for a free trial and when you're ready to launch, use offer code theread1word to save 10% off your first purch of a website or a domain. Go get started. You know you want to let them know that we sent you this episode
Crissle West
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Kid Fury
okay slurs. We're back. It's time for your letters.
Crissle West
Indeed. Send your questions to askthereadmail.com we may read them aloud on the show. If you'll remember, last week we had a letter from Ariel whose boyfriend left her in Italy right when she was starting to get her shit together.
Kid Fury
Is she in jail?
Crissle West
No. She said I should probably Start by saying that I wrote that letter the day after my boyfriend left me. So I was not exactly operating from a place of emotional stability. What I found out later, though, made the whole thing even crazier. Apparently, he had already told all of my friends and family that he was planning to propose. So everyone was expecting us to come home to a little welcome party. People knew and they were excited. But it turns out the day he broke up with me was less than 24 hours before he told all of them that he was going to ask me to marry him. Things got extra chaotic. Extra chaotic is crazy. But we had split the planning for our Italy trip in half. I planned the first part, he planned the second. When he left at 2am, we were supposed to catch a flight at 7am together to another part of Italy where his portion of the trip was beginning. So that meant that all the flights, hotels, reservations, and everything else were in his name. So when he left, I was truly asked out. At first I was devastated, but then I got mad because I started thinking about that ring. If he knew he was ending the relationship, he did not have to tell me about that proposal. I could have gone my whole life without knowing that information. But in a moment of distress, he chose to tell me the one thing he knew would hurt me the most. And that's when something shifted for me. And I thought, absolutely not. I will be damned if I spend the rest of this trip chasing a man across Italy and then back to to the US So I extended the trip and spent the original time of. And spent the original amount of time in Italy completely by myself, which was extremely expensive. But thankfully, I make enough money that I could absorb the damage without it ruining my life. I then spent.
Kid Fury
That's right.
Crissle West
I then spent another week in Italy, eating pasta, crying, swimming, crying some more, drinking wine, getting lost, crying again, and watching sunsets over the Adriatic Sea. It was simultaneously one of the best and worst experiences of my life. But I'm very proud of myself because if this had happened a year ago, I think I would have fallen apart. When I got home, all of my ex's stuff was still in our house. So I'm still not sure what emergency relocation operation was taking place. At first, we finally sat down and talked, and he told me that even four weeks into treatment, I still exhibit behaviors that make him feel bad. One example he gave was that he asked me not to text him after he left Italy, but I did it anyway because of things like that. He said he's not convinced that my diagnosis has much to do with our problems. And in his view, when push comes to shove, I choose myself over him. He also said. He also said that he didn't leave me in Italy. I simply chose not to fly back with him now.
Kid Fury
Huh?
Crissle West
I don't agree with that assessment, and I don't think that's how any of this works. But hearing someone you love reduce years of struggle, treatment, and effort into that conclusion is very painful. At this point, we are fully separated, and that is the end of the story. Thanks, Ariel.
Kid Fury
Some people are just so diabolical, so heartless, so evil. It doesn't even like. I think that the. I would try to make peace with this by telling myself, this bitch is crazier than me.
Crissle West
Damn,
Kid Fury
this bitch is crazier than me because. What are you talking about?
Crissle West
I may have my issues, but you're a shot.
Kid Fury
Look, girl, you are shot the fuck out. So you told everybody that we know that you finna propose to me, and then less than 24 hours later, you're like, sigh. But also, I did have a ring for you here, and I was gonna propose to you in this incredibly romantic place, but that therapy ain't therapizing fast enough. And it makes me feel bad that you ask questions
Crissle West
which.
Kid Fury
What a bitch.
Crissle West
Again, you could have simply left all of that out. The. The ring and the proposal and all that. It's like you wanted her to feel bad. You wanted it to be so much worse, and then to be like, Like. Well, for. As an example, I asked you not to text me after I left Italy, but you did anyway, bitch. Cause you left me in a foreign fucking country. Are you kidding? Yeah, you right. Let's break up. We have to break up. You're out of your fucking mind, baby.
Kid Fury
And let's sign it with a bullet because I shot him.
Crissle West
Ariel. Sounds like treatment, medication, therapy, and all that is working very well for you, so keep it going. This man ain't it.
Kid Fury
What a bitch.
Crissle West
God damn. To tell your whole family, too. Like, okay, all right.
Kid Fury
I didn't leave you. You chose not to fly back with me. Do you want to die? Like, who ain't.
Crissle West
We had an argument, you sat on your phone and booked another flight for just a couple hours later, and you thought I was gonna scramble to get all my shit together to do that, too? You want. You thought. Okay, all right, all right. Yeah, let's just break up. We just not together no more.
Kid Fury
I'm actually getting mad. Let's.
Crissle West
Okay.
Kid Fury
Because what the fuck is wrong with these niggas?
Crissle West
I don't think we have enough time.
Kid Fury
Anyone harming you?
Crissle West
Okay? Yeah. Good luck, Ariel. You can do better than this man. For sure.
Kid Fury
Easily.
Crissle West
All right. Our first letter this week comes from somebody who said, call me down bad down south.
Kid Fury
Oh God.
Crissle West
And she says, I am a 28 year old black woman and I want to visit my grandmother down south this summer. I have a complicated relationship with that side of the family, especially from the things my dad told me that they've said about him, my mom, me and my brother. But I recently realized that I only have a one sided view of my grandmother and I didn't think that was fair. We've gotten a little closer over the years and after she had a recent health scare, I decided I should spend some time with her down south. One issue is where I will be staying. I know my grandma will want me to stay at her house, but I don't want to. A few summers ago, during a family reunion, I got to see it for the first time and I made sure to keep my purse on my shoulder. It's a small house and very cluttered and not as clean as I would like it to be. Sure, I don't want to seem rude or snooty or northern, but I also don't want to sleep. I threw that northern in there. Okay, looks like beats. I plan on being down there for five to seven days. My grandmother isn't as financially stable as my dad and it's evident by her place. I wouldn't mind being there with her during the day, but laying my head down is another story. How do I tell her I'd rather stay at a hotel instead of her house in the least hurtful way possible? My dad's side already thinks we're uppity and bougie while also thinking we're weird because we live below our means. They don't know me very well and probably aren't used to how honest and blunt I can be about certain things. Sometimes the things I say come off harsher than I mean them. Should I just suck it up and grin and bear it for the short time or should I stand up for myself and advocate for what makes me feel comfortable? What would you do in this situation? Thanks so much. Down bad down South. Bless.
Kid Fury
Down bad down south is wild. Okay, maybe y' all are snooty and uppity. I don't know y' all straight like that. It's incredibly possible that you are snooty and uppity. I don't. Cause the way that you described it is Cluttered, like you didn't say, like, it's roaches, black molds, you know, stuff growing in the sink. So I don't have, like, a very clear picture of this place.
Crissle West
I think I do. And I think it's hoarders adjacent.
Kid Fury
It could be.
Crissle West
I'm thinking my grandma has some friends who lived alone and they had newspapers and magazines stacked up from like the 50s, 60s, 70s all over they house. That's what I'm thinking. I feel like I can easily picture this home. Yes.
Kid Fury
I have a feeling.
Crissle West
And it smells a little weird in there. You're like, is that mothballs? Is that. What is that?
Kid Fury
I've never smelled this before. I can't place it.
Crissle West
It's kind of like old beans and mothballs.
Kid Fury
Yes.
Crissle West
But what does it smell?
Kid Fury
And like fabric.
Crissle West
Yeah, it's just dusty in there. Smell like the 60s still in there.
Kid Fury
So, like, you could be snooty, uppity, whatever. Ultimately, what you want to be is comfortable.
Crissle West
Right.
Kid Fury
And so I think the thing that stood out to me the most is the way you describe your delivery in the way that you can say things sometimes. That is what I would focus on. It wouldn't be about whether or not I'm gonna stay at my grandmama house. I'm not. I don't want to. And it could just be because. It could be anything. It could be because you don't like the color of the wallpaper or something in there. If you don't wanna stay there, you don't wanna stay there. And I think it's better that you are in a place where you're comfortable and you can just be in good spirits when you're hanging around with everybod halfway in it or possibly miserable because you just don't like where you're laying your head.
Crissle West
Right.
Kid Fury
So I think I would just say, like, oh, Grandma, no, it's okay. I'm gonna get a hotel room. If you wanna be fake, you could be like, I don't wanna put you out. Or like, I would rather. Whatever. I will not choose that.
Crissle West
The Southern game of oh, no. Oh, yeah. They will argue you down.
Kid Fury
They will talk you out of there.
Crissle West
Yeah.
Kid Fury
I would likely say, I just like it when I have. I could spread out in the room. I could get up or go to sleep when I want to. I be snoring, whatever. I wouldn't make it about me and the way that I like to sleep and rest and so on and so forth. Now, to me, anybody who have a problem with that, that's on Them?
Crissle West
Yeah.
Kid Fury
Cause what are you saying? Like, I don't want to sleep at your house. Cause it stank.
Crissle West
I mean, I didn't want to say that.
Kid Fury
Right. Don't say that part down bad. That's what we're getting at, right?
Crissle West
No, I think I completely agree. I think it's perfectly fine to say, you know what, Meemaw, thank you so much. And I'm gonna be at this house every day. However. Every day, however, I do need. Right. I'm that type of person. Just need some time to themselves at the end of the night to, you know, do my little routines and. And kind of reset, recharge after a day of being around people like you. You can, you can put it like that even. You know, I really don't see nothing wrong with that. It's just. You go. You might have to really argue because.
Kid Fury
Yeah, you might.
Crissle West
They are. She probably not gonna want to hear that. But just understand, this is a Southern way of being. And all you have to do is keep saying, oh, no, ma', am, I couldn't possibly. I already got the room. It's non refundable. I gotta stay there. Thank you so much, though. I can't wait. You know, if you rent in a car, that's great. Cause then you can get yourself around without anybody else having to take you there. You know, you might have to go run your grandma to go get some beans or something. And that's fine. But I think it's fine to say it just like that. Just I. Yeah. Make it about you, not about her and her nasty house.
Kid Fury
1000%.
Crissle West
Make it about you preferring to be alone. And you know that. And if they still don't like it, then maybe they just think you uppity and bougie and northern and maybe you just are those things. And I wanted to come see my grandma. So that's how it is, right?
Kid Fury
Here we are.
Crissle West
It's both of those.
Kid Fury
Yeah. If it gets real dicey, make you be like, well, Grandma, I thought I'm gonna take you down to the Denny's.
Crissle West
Oh yeah.
Kid Fury
And we gonna have a nice big breakfast. And you know, I don't know. I would just probably, if it got sticky or whatever, I'd be like, I'll make it up to you. I can take you da da da, and see where it goes. But bae, you'll be all right.
Crissle West
Especially baby, for five to seven days. Girl, I'm not even lying about. I need my own space. And I need to just be in a room somewhere where I can zone out and dissociate like I. I'm not even lying about that. I really do need that Grandma.
Kid Fury
I don't want to sleep on a bed made of Jet magazines. I just don't want to do it.
Crissle West
So when I tell you, I can picture this house, Miss. I know. Miss Hattie House. I know know what this look like, Lord.
Kid Fury
I know what it does too.
Crissle West
Bless. Okay, good luck. Hope you have a good time with your grandmama. Our next letter comes from Lorraine who says I've been a listener since Beyonce put lemonade out. And I know you guys won't pull any punches with what I'm asking.
Kid Fury
Damn right won't.
Crissle West
I'm a 43 year old white woman and I recently discovered that I'm pregnant by my boyfriend, a 31 year old black man named Michael.
Kid Fury
Ariana, what are you doing here?
Crissle West
Our relationship from the beginning has been one of companionship and not really on a marriage trajectory. Specifically with the caveat that we would have an expiration date because I was gonna try and become a mother on my own. Using a sperm bank in pursuit of that, I had a scheduled MRI and found out that there was a fibroid growing on my uterus.
Kid Fury
Jesus.
Crissle West
And how much it was gonna interfere with any future pregnancy. Imagine my pure shock when they made me take a pregnancy test and it came back positive.
Kid Fury
Well, life has a way.
Crissle West
Not that shocked. I mean. Anyway, luckily I had the opportunity to tell my boyfriend the very next day because we were scheduled to go on a mini road trip for Memorial Day weekend. But we ended up coming home early because we both needed time to process the news. Him more so than I. He has since come around and says he's excited and we are transitioning our relationship to one of friends and co parents. The issue is that his dad disapproves because of the age gap, because I'm white and because we aren't married and are not planning to get married. He hasn't told.
Kid Fury
I can't argue with that.
Crissle West
Right. He hasn't even told his mother yet. Who is absolutely going to lose her shit. For all of those reasons and because Michael describes her as extremely religious, almost to an abusive level. Both of my parents died in 2024 after lengthy illnesses, which was one of the reasons I put off having children for so long. I truly feel like this is a gift they've given me from beyond and I already love my little baby. I feel like Michael's dad could come around and I want my little bug to have at least one grandparent. But aside from just staying steady and showing him with words and actions that I'm not here to take advantage of his. Is there anything I can do or say that might alleviate any of his concerns? I don't need his approval, nor do I need his support. But for Michael's sake and for my child, I want them to be part of our family. Thanks, Lorraine.
Kid Fury
Did she name herself Lorraine specifically because of Golden Girls?
Crissle West
Yes, she did.
Kid Fury
Because that was the first thing I thought of before you even started reading it.
Crissle West
The title, the email subject line was like, I found myself in an episode of Golden Girls.
Kid Fury
Yeah. Legitimately. That.
Crissle West
So, yes, Lorraine and Mike, except opposite race.
Kid Fury
What do you think here? Because I feel like I have a couple things going on in my head.
Crissle West
Well, so I think ultimately their concerns are valid. You're 43. He's 31. You're his baby mama at this point. And I would definitely be concerned about a white person's ability to raise a black child. However, that's something Michael should have thought about before he went nutting in a white woman. That's not really, you know, as a grandparent, that's like, that's outside of your control. But I wouldn't. I don't think I would be deliberately trying to make them feel better. I kind of feel like, you know, as long as you're a chill, normal, decent person, like you're not going around being crazy or, you know, being like, we can just raised the baby as white or saying nothing ridiculous like that, then. Jesus, right? Then I just feel like with time, you're gonna have to get over it. Like, you just. You either gonna get over it or you're gonna be a part of my. Or you're not gonna be a. A part of my child's life like you. You choose. But I wouldn't be trying to, like, you know, do flips or nothing so that his parents would think better of me. Like, yes, we have an age gap, but your son's 31 that's grown. And so, yeah, I mean, I would love for my baby to be connected to his black side for multiple reasons, but also especially because you don't have your own parents. So, like, yeah, you would love that for them, but I'm not. I wouldn't be advising you to go out of your way to make them feel better about this.
Kid Fury
Yeah, Completely agree. You want to have this baby. You're already in love with this baby. That is completely. You're. Yeah, I don't. I would never argue against that, but I completely agree with Crystal that I would allow Michael to navigate this with his family. That I completely understand. Right. And I would not be making any particular effort to explain, to remedy, to comfort these people. In fact, I would say that that might make it worse. So I would just play my position. If anybody needs me, call my name. Let me know if you want to ask some questions. This pricey, like, I mean, girl, you're more than 10 years older than this. This black man is fully grown, like you said.
Crissle West
Yeah.
Kid Fury
But as a parent.
Crissle West
Yeah.
Kid Fury
This white woman who is 12 years older than you or whatever and is now knocked up and. But y' all not getting married.
Crissle West
Y' all not even together. Y' all kind of just was for a little while. Oopsy doopsie.
Kid Fury
Yeah. I would completely get where they're coming from. I do think, though, it is best for you to just be pregnant, be healthy, and let time do what it does. Because it is very likely. It's not promised, but it's very likely he'll have his baby. They'll meet this baby and be like, oh, my grandchild. Love him. They'll probably still won't like you, but at least your child will have grandparents. Like you said. You wanted the baby to have at least one. I mean, let's be honest.
Crissle West
You know what I mean? I mean, you are still a white woman who is not. If they that religious. The fact that y' all not married and not. You're not gonna hurry up and get married before the baby's born. Oh, Lord. That might be.
Kid Fury
You even had this baby out of wedlock and wed wasn't even on lock. It wasn't even in the conversation.
Crissle West
Wed wasn't even part of the conversation. Conversation. Michael. Oh, they're gonna be irate, but they
Kid Fury
gotta be irate with Michael.
Crissle West
Right? Cause that's they child and. And it's really his job to run interference as far as like, all of that is concerned.
Kid Fury
Agreed.
Crissle West
And I would make them feel welcome until they do say or do something disrespectful about your baby specifically. But even to you. Cause you pregnant and you know, it's just certain shit you not going to say or do to me simply because you don't approve of me. We're grown, so I. I'm not going. I wouldn't be going out of my way to make them feel better. I also would. I also wouldn't exclude them until they gave me a reason to exclude them.
Kid Fury
Yeah, agreed.
Crissle West
But you might, you know, you might want to, like, make sure your friends and your people have you a Baby shower. Because. Because the baby shower from that side of the family is gonna be at the church. Can you even go to the church without being married? Child, maybe not.
Kid Fury
Girl. Yeah, it'll be on the lawn of the church.
Crissle West
You know, if. If they wanna meet you, I would be willing to do that. You know, I mean, I'm. It sounds insane that they wouldn't wanna meet you, but.
Kid Fury
But even as a reach out to the.
Crissle West
Yeah, I would have been back. Yeah. Yeah. Somebody is gonna be excited about Michael having a baby. His cousins or something. It might take the other family some time to come around, but I mean, I got over it. When my sister in law got pregnant and I mean immediately the nanosecond she told me she was pregnant, I was like, me and you have never had no issues, sister. Hello. Love you down. Like I got over it that fast. So
Kid Fury
who knows?
Crissle West
Yeah, let Michael's people do the same. But good luck to you, girl. I mean, you wanted a baby anyway. You just thought she was gonna have one anonymously. And. Yeah, and God said. Well, God and biology kind of worked hand in hand here, but yeah, they did. Good luck, baby. Our last letter comes from someone who said, call me sad birthday girl.
Kid Fury
Okay.
Crissle West
In January, my husband and best friend started to plan a surprise birthday trip for me. In February, I found out about the trip so it was no longer a surprise. But they continued with the planning so that I didn't have to do any of it. They invited my closest friends and some of my cousins and reserved a 10,000 square foot Airbnb with eight bedrooms and nine baths.
Kid Fury
Damn.
Crissle West
My husband allowed guests to make payments to him until the full amount was due in May. Five days before the trip, three of my friends who had confirmed that they would stay in the house told my husband that they were going to get their own Airbnb since ours was crowded and they want they 550 each back. I've been on multiple trips with these friends and we've always shared a room and most of the time we even shared a bed. So when I found out about them canceling, I was so upset and hurt. I cried because it felt like it was a big fu to me on my B day. Like, girl, here's a 1700 tab.
Kid Fury
Happy birthday to work.
Crissle West
We all went out that night and not one of those friends offered me a drink, a shot. They didn't dance with me or anything. The vibes were off all weekend. I felt like we were walking on eggshells around each other, which didn't make sense because I Know why I'm mad, but what's y' all issue? When we got home, one of the three asked me out to lunch and my response was, no, thanks. I'm not feeling y' all right now. That was messed up to have us eat that Airbnb cost. We went back and forth. She zelled me seventeen hundred dollars and said we don't have to talk again. I sent her back 1150 and told her she shouldn't have to pay for all three of them. A second friend started another bigger group chat with all of us and said, I wish you well, but we don't have to be friends anymore. My husband showed me their text to him where at first they asked for a refund and then they said, keep 200 and then they said just give the one friend her 550 back because she has important obligations she got to take care of.
Kid Fury
I was never good at math. You have to, have to. I'm processing this as it was a lot of money.
Crissle West
My husband replied to all of them with screenshots of the Zel confirmations refunding their money. He said he wanted to keep the peace between me and my friends.
Kid Fury
Right.
Crissle West
But my best friend showed me another group chat where the other friends were saying like, he just going to have to eat that seventeen hundred dollars over and over like they didn't care and it was no big deal. In that chat, my bestie stuck up for us and was like, why y' all bailing on her? It's just three days, y' all being selfish. Etc. So now they mad at that too. And two out of our three friends have told me and my bestie they no longer want to be friends with us. And one of them even unfollowed us on social media. How could we have handled this differently? I love my friends, but I don't think I did anything wrong. So how do we salvage this friendship? I've known these girls since college, so it's been almost 20 years and I'd hate to lose friends behind this. Thanks, sad birthday girl.
Kid Fury
Did I miss something? What the is their problem?
Crissle West
So they said the Airbnb was too crowded so they were going to get their own. And she was like, why are they behaving like this? Well, now that I think that's everybody, I think that's what's shocking Everybody. Cuz like 5 days before the trip when everybody has paid their money and now you come around talking about you want refunds. Unfortunately, if you, if you are traveling with me, that's not happening. That is Just not right. There are no refunds. Five days before the trip, girl. Airbnb not giving me one dime back. You already confirmed and said you would be coming to the. To the trip and staying in the Airbnb with us. You knew you was gonna have to share a room beforehand. You knew you was not getting your own room. So for you to all of a sudden be upset and be like, okay, well we getting our own, that's fine. But that 550 you paid is. We don't get refunds for this five days before the trip. Nobody's giving you a fucking refund.
Kid Fury
So that is wild. And then they mad, right?
Crissle West
And then they mad like.
Kid Fury
Like, what did you think this was?
Crissle West
And. And going back and forth, even though that man. So. So that's where I think sad birthday girl wants to know how she could have handled this differently. I. I think no matter how you handled this, these friends was gonna act like this.
Kid Fury
Agreed.
Crissle West
Because I don't think the initial problem was you. Like, they the ones who decided who would give you a refund on a hotel or Airbnb five days before your trip is supposed to start.
Kid Fury
That's exactly what I was.
Crissle West
Absolutely nobody. You could have booked direct with the hotel. You could have booked through a third party app. You could have got an Airbnb all kind of. You're not getting a refund five days before the stay, so why would you think you could get one from me?
Kid Fury
And I hate like that. Like, I hate when it be regular principal and people feel like they could play in your face and furthermore be stank to you because we're friends. Ho. There isn't a living sector of the world where you could have done this at all. And you know that, right? And you know that, right? So you want to get tight with me and then talk about, here go your little fucky ass money, bitch, and we don't ever have to be friends again. I just said thank you. And you are correct, bitch. The fuck you think this is? It's my birthday, right? We done did all of the functioning to make sure everybody is solid. It's going to be crowded, bitches. Eight rooms in here, ho. But past all of that, no, you're not getting this fucking money back.
Crissle West
Yeah. No, you're not getting this fucking money back. But you need it. I'm sure you do. And at the same time, who would do that? Who's giving if I don't get the money back? You're telling me you want me to come out of my pocket so that you can have your money back. So now we really have to. Now we really have to sit down and talk because. What is it? No, for real. Because you need to tell me. You pregnant and you need an abortion within the next few weeks, bitch. Like, bitch, it needs to be bad. It needs to be bad. And in that case, what you mean? Y' all clearly not broke because y' all getting y' all own Airbnb.
Kid Fury
Mm.
Crissle West
So y' all clearly not broke, right?
Kid Fury
Girl, what is the actual T. Oprah Winfrey? So what's the truth?
Crissle West
What are y' all really mad at? What are y' all really being stank about? Right? It's not me.
Kid Fury
Are you mad that I have a man and he's also involved in the planning festivities?
Crissle West
Damn.
Kid Fury
And love me down. Is that what it is? Are you hoes miserable because you want this situation? Because it's not even just the money. It's not even just, you know, the principle of not getting this money back or wanting whatever. You are being stank, right? You ending the friendship. You talking shit in group chats, getting checked by another friend. Thank God, right?
Crissle West
I'm at the bar and. And it's my fucking birthday. Nobody's buying me a drink or a shot. Like, y' all not even talking to me. Not dancing. Like, why are you even on the trip?
Kid Fury
Why are you here?
Crissle West
Why are you even. And how you got an attitude with me when y' all asked my man for a refund five days before the trip was supposed to start and he gave you the fucking refund. So how. How do you have an attitude? I really don't get it. How you mad?
Kid Fury
I don't know how I would have done anything different.
Crissle West
No, that's what I'm saying.
Kid Fury
No, I wouldn't have done different, Sonic. Sorry.
Crissle West
Oh, I would have did something different. I would have said, you're absolutely not getting a goddamn penny back. You're not getting one red cent again. Because again, you're asking me to come out of my pocket. You saying, crystal, can I have $550? And I'm gonna have to say, girl, for what? For what?
Kid Fury
Yeah, for what?
Crissle West
You asking me on my birthday for 550. What do you need that for again? It needs to be abortion levels of urgent, otherwise. That's too damn bad. That's too damn bad.
Kid Fury
And I owe my baby daddy $2,000 of child support.
Crissle West
What?
Kid Fury
Trishador got to pay her baby father $2,000 child support. $2,000 a month for child support?
Crissle West
What?
Kid Fury
I just read that, like, hour ago. Wild. Oh, down bad.
Crissle West
Scary world.
Kid Fury
Scary world indeed. Gagged,
Crissle West
Paying a man child support. Oh, my God.
Kid Fury
Oh, like I would rather be.
Crissle West
I just shivered, right?
Kid Fury
Girl, throw me in the freak.
Crissle West
Yuck.
Kid Fury
I could not, right?
Crissle West
How do you salvage this friendship? I mean, I would really want to. I would just want to understand what made them think five days before a trip, you could even get a reef. Like, I think I'm really stuck on that.
Kid Fury
Like, yeah, it's so confusing.
Crissle West
They really get out of their minds when it comes to trips.
Kid Fury
Delta jhope.
Crissle West
No full fucking refund. Like, you're not getting money. You're not getting cash back when you cancel like this. So what made you think you could come to my man and be like, yeah, come up off of that 1650? Cause we gonna get our own Airbnb. Girl, fuck you.
Kid Fury
That's why the abortion should even make even more sense. Cause, ho. If you needed this money, why did you spend it in the first place? What just happened that you now all of a sudden need this coin back
Crissle West
five days before the trip? Y' all like, okay, well, we don't want to share a room now. Okay, but y' all knew you was gonna share a room in the first place, so. So why are you bitches being weird and then acting weird to me in the club? Like, it's not. I think maybe if I were you, I would have. I would have at the Airbnb. Or at some point, I would have been like, let's sit down and talk. Cause the vibe is weird, and I'm not understanding why. Like, yeah, this. It sounds like y' all didn't really. And when y' all got back home after the trip and one of them invited you out to lunch, you was like, yeah, I'm not feeling you right now. I would have gone to lunch.
Kid Fury
Oh, yeah, I forgot about that.
Crissle West
So we could have the conversation. I would have been more open to talking about it. The communication side of it. I think maybe that is something you could have done differently. But they were moving weird from the beginning.
Kid Fury
Very weird. So very weird. It just felt like they had an issue with something that was unspoken. Something they didn't say, something they didn't want to say. It just feels like they. But then if you not gonna say it, shut your ass up. At least. Like, I didn't do anything to you, right, Nigga? Didn't do anything to you, right? What are you mad at?
Crissle West
Yeah, I agree. You. They are being. And I would not expect this from people in their mid-30s to early 40s. Like, I honest. This sound like 22 year olds trying to have a. A group trip. Girls trip and. And people turning around and throwing fits and acting like this. Like at this big age. Y' all know you're not getting that $550 back, so you know that it just. They were being weird. The fact that your husband gave them their money back and they were still acting strange. What is it? Did we invite somebody to stay in the house? You don't. Like, like, what is it? Make it make sense. Why are you acting like, okay, well,
Kid Fury
yeah, birthday girl, like a. A week long trip it. Or stay at like, Sandals or something like that and called him the week prior and like, actually, never mind. I'm gonna need all of those thousands of dollars back.
Crissle West
No.
Kid Fury
Santa's gonna be like, the answer's no. Bitches in hell need a. I don't know what to tell you.
Crissle West
They want it. They want a Gatorade that's not boiling so bad. And guess what? They're not getting.
Kid Fury
You're not getting it. Yeah, they wild. They are shot the fuck out. I done told them beat it.
Crissle West
And then they got mad at your bestie for being like, okay, why y' all acting like this? Right? It's three days in the Airbnb, y' all being selfish. And so now they're like, yeah, we're not friends with you either. Okay, all right. You might be better off without them, but I would want to have a conversation because. What you mean we've been friends for 20 years and this is how you are acting? We've had group trips before. Now, at my massive age, we all get our own bedrooms because everybody's old, but if we've done this before, it. Your friend's behavior is just really not making sense for me. Even if I did decide to get my own hotel room or something, I would still never expect to get that $550 back.
Kid Fury
I wouldn't either.
Crissle West
You just charge that to the fucking game.
Kid Fury
So 1,000%. And some of the girlies like sharing rooms, some of them sleeping in beds together. It's cozy and comfy. Girl time.
Crissle West
Yeah, it is fun. It's like a. It's like a sleepover. It is a sleepover.
Kid Fury
Like a sleepover.
Crissle West
Right? So I'm not even. I would love for one of your friends to write in and be like, what she didn't tell you is because right now their behavior is not making no sense to me. It's just not. I don't get it.
Kid Fury
Yeah, it's really confusing.
Crissle West
So good luck. Moving on though, because it don't even sound like at this point they willing to have the conversation. Maybe if they were, y' all could sit down face to face and talk about it, but if not, I mean, what you supposed to do with hoes that are being unreasonable and don't want to talk? You just got to wash your hands and move on.
Kid Fury
Yeah.
Crissle West
All right, babe. But good luck to you. That is going to wrap up the listener letters this week. If you have a question for us, please send us an email asktheread gmail.com we're going to take another quick break and then we'll be right back.
Kid Fury
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Crissle West
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Kid Fury
okay folks, we have returned and it is now time for the read. I'll make one mine really quick because I don't have one and it's actually really silly and petty. Okay, well, two. One. Spencer Pratt. Tough, ha ha bitch. Tough titties doll baby. You already knew what time it was. And I feel particularly powerful and pleased with myself because I 1000% voted for the woman who overtook your spot. You were feeling very cunty and cute, weren't you? Beat it. Beat it. And your wife that wants to be Gigi Goode so bad, she looked a mess the other day.
Crissle West
Yeah, she did.
Kid Fury
With that fuck ass Bob. They said she had on a blonde Darth Vader helmet. Both y' all bitches.
Crissle West
She did look horrib.
Kid Fury
She really did so. Ha ha. And to all of your MAGA constituents who are like eating dick even. What's this Republican man who's in the race for governor of California? I can't remember. He's British. Oh, wow. So like, why are you even.
Crissle West
You don't even go here.
Kid Fury
Shut up. So that's really what I wanted to say. That was the first one. Haha, bitches that you get. I'm so. Ooh. This is what voting is about. This is what voting is about.
Crissle West
Feeling good.
Kid Fury
Watching those numbers move as they're still counting balance and knowing that your vote counted towards not only positivity the change you wanna see, but absolutely decimating the heart, mind and soul of a bitch you can't stand.
Crissle West
Yeah. And didn't he say he was gonna leave LA if he lost?
Kid Fury
Yes, he did. And I can't wait for the day I'll pack his bags for him. No shade but to say wait.
Crissle West
They're not. The people will not forget that you said that, brother. They are going to be waiting for you to get the up out the city out. Yeah, love that.
Kid Fury
I will never forget Lauren Conrad calling you a sucky person.
Crissle West
He's Spencer's a sucky person. I will never like Spencer. He's just a sucky person.
Kid Fury
Same Lauren. And then the extra pity one is for fans of Grand Theft Auto 6, mostly for this meme they've created of this. And this happened before we got Grand Theft Auto 6. Oh, it is such a common meme now. People say it on TikTok in relation to things that have nothing to do with video games. I heard a lotto song where she referenced something niggas waiting on her like GTA 6 or something. Something like. It is a huge meme.
Crissle West
Yeah.
Kid Fury
And to that I wanna say gamers who feel that way, if you're not a Kingdom Hearts fan, shut your ass, okay? We waited from like middle school to AARP. We waited from like 11 years old to getting free breakfast at IHOP for the third game to come out. I waited so long. I'm so traumatized and so scarred and I've been so neglected by Square Enix when it comes to Kingdom Hearts, the third one that I've been waiting my entire life for. The third one that was supposed to close a chapter that I was playing since I was a child, since I walked to Blockbuster Video to rent the first game. Blockbuster Video. I walked there, okay? And it was until middle read that I got to finish that story. I don't want to hear shit about waiting for GTA 6, bitch. Nothing. Talk to fans of Half Life, a game I've never played. They've been waiting for the third game since like Truman was in office. They've been GTA 6. You bitches still play Grand Theft Auto 5 online. Why is this a big meme? You're not real gamers and you'll never be real gamers. And you can eat my dick before you try and like make fun of Kingdom Hearts fans. Because I too will be playing Grand Theft Auto VI on the day that it is released. The same way I played every Grand Theft Auto before this. A lot of y' all bitches talking shit. Your first Grand Theft Auto was four or five, perhaps three. I played the first one where it was pixel shaded and it was a top down camera. I played all the spinoffs. You can't say nothing to me about Grand Theft Auto and you can't say nothing to me about. You can't say anything to me about video games period.
Crissle West
Mm mm.
Kid Fury
But you little Fortnite playing doofuses and you incel nerds making this. Oh, we got the Knicks in the finals before GTA 6. Shut up, okay? Shut up. They just showed footage for Kingdom Hearts 4 on Tuesday. I'm so traumatized. I didn't even take it seriously. I was like, why are they showing footage for this game and a random Nintendo direct? The last time that they showed anything for this was four fucking years ago. And now at 7:45am And a Nintendo direct, they're like, oh, we have gameplay footage. I don't believe you. I don't believe you. When that game comes out and not when they announce a date when they're like, it is available to purchase. Now is when I will take Kingdom Hearts 4 Seriously, you bitches with this Grand Theft Auto 6 shit. We got this before GTA 6. I don't feel bad for you. I don't feel sorry for you. Matter of fact, I wouldn't mind if they push it back to next year again just so you hoes can get a real taste of waiting for art. Imagine waiting for that self titled album to come out. Remember when we was like before Beyonce came out starving malnourished.
Crissle West
It had been eons. The hive was desperate for just a crumb for mother. Just a crumb mother. Maybe mother.
Kid Fury
You get a Call of Duty every year. You play Fortnite as he man Master of the universe. And fucking Michael Scott is in Fortnite.
Crissle West
Michael Scott, the officer Scott's tots.
Kid Fury
Scott's Tots and Dwight Shrew are playable in Fortnite. You have no shortage of white people to shoot folks.
Crissle West
Oh Lord.
Kid Fury
So that is my petty part two. Because I can't wait to play Grand Theft Auto 6. And it's based in Miami and it really, I mean based in. What did they call it? The Miami one? Vice City. And it really looks like Miami. Like it is freakish how much it looks like my hometown. So I'm gonna be there day one. But I just wanted to be petty and say, you bitches talking about, oh, we got this. Until GTA 6, you've not waited for things. You haven't waited for things. You haven't had the soul sucked out of you. When it comes into anticipation for a video game, you can't even get the soul sucked out of you when it comes for sex because nobody likes you. You.
Crissle West
Yeah,
Kid Fury
I'm done now.
Crissle West
Oh, well. Over here in New York City, we had a devastating blow on Monday evening when the Knicks played Game 3 of the NBA Finals and Donald J. Trump decided to drag his decaying, decrepit ass into the city for this, which created just a massive. I mean, so fucking irritating for absolutely everybody. They closed off all the streets around the Garden. They had no bags. Nobody could bring a bag into the arena. Which was also a problem because Jordan woods had been bringing her bag and that was her little lucky. You know, like, every time I have my bag, we win type shit. Anyway, all of this because apparently the man who's been shot at three times over the past month is still not afraid for his life and decided he was gonna go be a pain in the ass at the Knicks game. Now, literally, as far as I'm concerned, this is James Dolan's fault because Trump could not have gone to the game without James Dolan inviting him and making concessions for him to be there. Like, if he, if he wanted to say, donald Trump is a fascist piece of shit and I'm banning him from Madison Square Garden, he could do that. He did not do that. Yeah, because James Dolan and Donald Trump are friends. Dolan is one of Trump's biggest, well, almost said advisors. He might be advisor, but donators for sure. And so everybody is blaming the loss on the presence of Trump. And I don't think y' all are wrong. Like, I. I truly believe that that man was not only a bad omen, but he soaked up all of the good energy that had been in this city. This city had been. It was like we were walking on air for weeks. It was just incredible with this 13 game winning streak and everybody feeling good. People are smiling at each other in the fucking streets. It's like a different city. So. So it does now feel like some of that good energy has been deflated. Really. By the time this comes out, game four will have already happened. This should be a huge fucking game. But, yeah, fuck Donald Trump and James Dolan for putting white. So you, you had the man, you invited this man to the game. You got all these security measures in place. NBA players can't even bring bags into the arena. Like everybody's doing the most over this fuck ass president. Only for him to fall asleep during this. Yes, only for him to fall asleep in the second quarter and leave at halftime. What the fuck was the point?
Kid Fury
I'm telling you, he's Trolling people. He just want to get on people nerves.
Crissle West
Yeah, I really do believe it. So that was just very shitty. Very selfish.
Kid Fury
Tickets.
Crissle West
Hours. Yes. It took hours to get inside the Garden. Yes, hours. Hours. Because of all of the extra security measures over Donald Trump. Like, okay, really, do we. I don't think we care that much whether he lives or dies, and I think we all need to be honest about that. We don't really care if he lives or dies. Y' all should have let somebody go in there. And if he got popped, he got popped. You know, this is America happens. But, yes, it's been very shitty because the city was on such a high. So for Trump and Dolan to come in and act like this for. Again, I'm blaming James Dolan because you rolled out the red carpet for this asshole. And if the Knicks don't win this series, I fully believe that the Knicks will never win a ring as long as James Dolan is in charge of the organization. Because after the game, he also had the Madison Square Garden communications department or whoever put out a memo talking about Mayor Mom, Donnie and the police commissioner obviously don't care about New Yorkers because they're still doing all the closing off streets around the arena. And so they said it was about the president, but it clearly wasn't about the president. They don't really care about the fans and the. And the venues and the bars and restaurants around. Girl, shut the the up. It's you who don't actually give a about the fans. It's you and I. So I believe that if the Knicks somehow lose this series, they. It will be because of the man who owns the team, and they won't prosper until he decides to get rid of it. But we'll see how that unfolds. And this goes a little bit into. This isn't really a read, but there's been a lot of what is a real New Yorker Type of conversations happening online lately. And that's Jennifer Lopez's fault because she went on Subway Takes. So she went on Subway Takes. Have you seen that show where the nigga on the subway be like, what's your hot take? Right? So hers was that you can't be a real New Yorker if you weren't born in New York City, which is an argument people have been making forever. And it's just like, girl, that's why we use adjectives. I just feel like, like, certainly the New York City public school system taught y' all about adjectives. That is why we put adjectives in front of New Yorker. New Yorkers who were born and raised here are known as native New Yorkers. If y' all want to be the bestest, most importantest New Yorkers, that's fine. If y' all want to be at the front of the parade when the Knicks win, I'm not going to argue about that. You can have that. But people. Jennifer, you don't even live here. Like, I'm not letting a who don't even live here tell me that I'm not a New Yorker. Like, I don't care. You were not. Do you know that being born in New York City was not your personal accomplishment? Do you know you did absolutely nothing to make that happen?
Kid Fury
What if you moved to New York when you were, like, four?
Crissle West
Oh, and that's the other thing. They all have their own little caveats and their own little exceptions and. Oh, well, it's okay if you did regions. Oh, it's okay if you came before you were two. Oh, it's okay if you, an immigrant. Oh, it's okay if you did. Like, everybody has their own little. Mm. Okay. Which is another reason why you don't pay attention to what random people have have to say. I live here. I'm part of the community here. I shop local. I, I, I have immersed myself in New York City. I allowed the city to change me because this is where I was destined to be. This is my home. Therefore, I am a New Yorker. I'm not arguing with you about it. I've never claimed to be from New York City. That would be ridiculous. Have you heard me talk? If you hear me talk for 10 seconds, you're going to know that I was not born and raised in New York City. I don't sound like it. And I've never claimed to be. I will never say that I was born in New York. But where I was born, where I grew up, and where I live now are three different cities in three different states. So what the do you want? What the do you want? It's not my fault. I was not born in New York City. Just like it's not your accomplishment that you were born in New York City. The idea that I'm somehow not a real New Yorker. I really live here, though, so.
Kid Fury
Okay, so I think that, like, saying you're a New Yorker or any other, you know, city, whatever is different to me than saying, like, I'm from New York, right?
Crissle West
And you would think that that would be, you know, obvious, right? You would think that. And yet the conversation, the argument has gone on and on and on and on, on and on. Because people refuse to say, okay, there's a difference between people who moved here and people who were born here. Or, you know, if you grew up here, saying you're from here versus people who moved here when they were 30. Like, I. To me, the conversation is asinine because words mean things and you just need very small, specific words to clear this whole up. So I'm blaming Jennifer Lopez for that. It's really her fault for reigniting this dumb ass debate. And at a time where as New Yorkers, we should all be one band, one sound about the NBA Finals, we should all be coming together to make sure Donald Trump does not. Because look, who you excluding. You excluding Spike Lee, but you including Donald Trump, that's who you want on your team. That's how strict you want to be. Think about it. I wouldn't if I were you. I wouldn't if I were you. But okay, like, I just feel like y' all are being too weird about it when all you have to say is, I'm a native New Yorker or I'm from New York or I moved there when I was 30 or whatever. Like, you can just. I don't understand what all of the non stop debate is about. Like, do y' all not. Y' all haven't heard these words? Y' all didn't know about this? This is brand new to all of you, or what? Like, it's just not making sense. But, yeah, Donald Trump's not coming tonight, so let's go next, shout out to God for putting me in a position to where I would not be conflicted rooting for this team. And yeah, we. We hoping for the best Knicks and five Ho.
Kid Fury
Did you see the reporter who asked Zoran Mamdani how much his tickets cost? And you know where he would be sitting or some shit like that?
Crissle West
Mm, yeah, I did.
Kid Fury
I was like, yeah, it's gonna be this. Because socialism was like, I paid $1,000. I got them from Madison Square Garden. I would be standing up next, right?
Crissle West
And that thousand dollars is standing room only. That is the po. He will be in the section with the poor for $1,000.
Kid Fury
$1,000. That is in this economy, right?
Crissle West
And this is while Trump is in a fucking box with the owner of the team. But, Mom, Donnie's the problem. No, I don't think so. James Dolan is the problem. Y', all, let's all stay focused. Let's all stay focused. Because the way he has. I mean, and this is just me. I've Done a lot of reading and learning over the past few weeks. He's not done a great job at managing this team. Y' all have been asking him to sell the team for decades. I don't think he's gonna do it. But if they don't win this series. I don't know. I don't know. I just don't think it's gonna be good for James Dolan. I really don't.
Kid Fury
Like.
Crissle West
I'm not sure exactly how we can touch that billionaire, but he gotta get the up out of here. The city needs it. We. We're riding high. Okay. Things are doing and things are great. It's Pride Month. Everybody's being ultra gay. Yeah. So we, you know, we deserve this, so. But we'll see. Let's go, let's go, let's go. I'm nervous. I'm nervous for the game tonight. I'm finna go out and. Yeah.
Kid Fury
Anyway, I' ma watch it.
Crissle West
You should. You really should.
Kid Fury
I kind of want to watch it.
Crissle West
I mean, are you gonna follow.
Kid Fury
Yeah, I might check it out.
Crissle West
Are you gonna, like. Do you follow basketball pretty well or. I don't know.
Kid Fury
No, Yeah, I could follow. Basketball is the sport that I can follow.
Crissle West
Okay.
Kid Fury
Like football. Oh, my goodness. Gimme a graph. Like, I can't. I can't.
Crissle West
That's crazy. Cause football is so much slower. It's so much easier to see what's going on with football.
Kid Fury
Yeah. But it has so many more moving parts and, like, the way that scores work and all of that type of shit. And when you, like a foul or what, it's just.
Crissle West
Okay.
Kid Fury
I can kind of get it. Okay. So they trying to get to that side. They trying to get to that side. And you try. You gotta try not to let them stop. That's all I got for you.
Crissle West
All right.
Kid Fury
I don't know who does what, but I know you, you know, trying to get to that side.
Crissle West
Yeah.
Kid Fury
But basketball, Yeah. I could fully follow a full thing of basketball, but.
Crissle West
Oh, all right. Anyway.
Kid Fury
Is that what I want to do tonight?
Crissle West
Donald Trump, James Brown, forever and always. Jlo. Just because. And Nixon.
Kid Fury
Yeah. Why not?
Crissle West
Stirring up the dumbest possible discourse. You're not a real. No, I say that New Yorker. New York City is made up of people who were not born here, for better or worse. It is. It. It has always been that way. You either you either fuck with the vibe of New York and the vibe of New York with you, or you don't like. It's not for everybody, of course, but the City is made up of people who weren't born here. I don't know why y' all go around acting like you did something by being born in New York.
Kid Fury
Maybe if it was like, you're not a New Yorker. If you only been here for less than a year. I don't know, maybe something like, maybe you weren't born here.
Crissle West
I mean, girl, everybody has their own little rules. That's the thing. You could get together all the native New Yorkers, and they would all have different caveats about who's really a New Yorker. They would all have their own little exceptions and their own little rules and, oh, 10 years, 20 years, 50 years. As long as you spend more than half of your life here. Like, these are all things that I have heard directly from people who were born here. That's why I don't take none of you hoes seriously. Cuz y' all can't even come together on a consensus about it when the definition is a who lives here. Like, sorry, I will never claim to be a native. I'm obviously not that, but I'm absolutely a New Yorker, and I'm not going to not call myself one because Jennifer Lopez doesn't think such. Like, out of here. Imagine, of all people, it won't be you stopping me.
Kid Fury
Actually, since Jenny from the block said
Crissle West
it's Jenny with her orange drink and her ham and cheese on a roll, which no real has ever ordered. Ever.
Kid Fury
Wait, she ordered a what?
Crissle West
You didn't hear about that? When. When did she do that interview? When they asked her about her bodega order and she was like. Like a ham and cheese on a roll and like an orange drink. Let me see if I can find that Jennifer Lopez.
Kid Fury
Has Jennifer Lopez ever been to New York?
Crissle West
Like, have you. Have you ever been to a bodega? Like, ham and cheese on the road, a small bag of chips and an orange drink.
Kid Fury
I'm like an orange drink. Which one?
Crissle West
Talking about. If you know, you know. What do you mean? You talk about the little. No.
Kid Fury
What? I don't.
Crissle West
Anyway, it won't.
Kid Fury
I mean, I'm sure people order a ham and cheese, but, like, I. I don't. As many times I've been in a bodega. I don't. I can't recall anyone ever ordering a ham and cheese anything.
Crissle West
I've never heard nobody say orange drink up here. But you know what? Yeah, whatever, girl. Whatever. Like, I think you was just saying something, Miss Girl. Oh, it was a 73 questions interview with Vogue back in 2024.
Kid Fury
Oh, where they, like, walk through your house?
Crissle West
Yeah. Were they?
Kid Fury
Okay.
Crissle West
Ooh. Okay. She cleared the air about it in an interview with Harper's Bazaar about a sandwich. About the drink. The orange drink was basically just a plain orange drink. It came in a little plastic container with a little bit of aluminum foil on it. Okay. So. Yeah, you talking about the little huggy.
Kid Fury
Oh, she's talking about the.
Crissle West
Yeah, yeah, the little barrels.
Kid Fury
I don't even know Miami, we had a name for it, and I can't think of what it is right now.
Crissle West
I want to say we called it juice, thinking it was juice.
Kid Fury
We used to call it something.
Crissle West
Oh, Jennifer Waters.
Kid Fury
Something water.
Crissle West
Not quarter water.
Kid Fury
Yeah, I think we used to call them quarter waters.
Crissle West
Really?
Kid Fury
I think so.
Crissle West
Okay, well, you know, different cities, different. Oh, you know what? No, I just googled it and somebody on Reddit called it the same thing. Okay.
Kid Fury
Yeah, I'm pretty sure that's what we call them.
Crissle West
Well, regardless, Jennifer Lopez won't be the bitch to change my mind about whether I'm a New Yorker. Unlike Jennifer Lopez, I'm not leaving, so. And my daughter's a native New Yorker, so suck my dick. And that'll wrap up this.
Kid Fury
There's that as well. My child's still from Harlem, so what's up?
Crissle West
Not. I'm not arguing with you about this. Out of here.
Kid Fury
Imagine she trying to gatekeep a city for. For you don't even stay there no
Crissle West
more that you don't even live in. Girl, get out my face. All right, that is going to wrap up this week's episode of the Read. Check us out on social media at. This is the Read. Our website is. This is the read.com. thank you again to the producers of Cats a Jellicle Ball for having me at the Jellicle Ball. I had a beautiful time. God, it was so good. It's a. It's just a good old gay time. It really is. Thank you so much, Jade, for joining me this week on Crystal's Couch to help me answer more of your emails. For advice, you can find the show at Crystal's Couch and all of our episodes and so on and so forth in all the usual places. Any news from you this week, Kid Fury?
Kid Fury
My podcast, Furious Thoughts is available on YouTube as well as all your podcast platforms. This week we have Jonica Booth on the podcast. Always great to see.
Crissle West
Love her.
Kid Fury
My girl. We got to talk about rap shit and have little rap shit moment and recall all of the hard work and fun times that we had on that show. We also talked about some other shows and her comedy work. Go check it out. I think like the longest episode slash interview that I've done so far. Cause we was just running our mouth like we always did. So go check that out. Patreon.com kferi for more. Also, Link is famous. She has toys now. So you can go to kfeory.commerch to get yourself a link Pink plush toy. And that's it, I think. Oh, thank you everybody who came to my my standup show last week. I had a really good time. It was fun and I didn't pass out and I remembered my jokes so great and Amen.
Crissle West
All right, y' all take care of yourselves. Nixon 5. We'll see y' all next week.
Kid Fury
That's right, 5 and 6. Oh, no, that's not how that works. Prime day is June 23rd through the 26th. These deals are so appealing, like portable steamers for steaming.
Crissle West
Whoa. Did I just sing soprano? I think I'm breaking into song. Epic deals on air fryers, vacuums and skin care.
Kid Fury
I can't stop singing shop.
Crissle West
Epic deals this prime day, June 23rd through the 26th. I think that's it. Nope, there's more luggage. Smart glasses. Tyler Redick and Chumba Casino. A winning combination. Another checkered flag for Tyler Redick in 23xi racing this time at Cota in the Chumba Casino Toyota Camry.
Kid Fury
That's three wins this season. Talk about a lucky streak.
Crissle West
Chumba Casino Casino, proud partner of Tyler Redick and 2311 Racing play for free at chumbacasino.com let's Chumba. No purchase necessary.
Kid Fury
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Crissle West
CTNC's 21 plus, sponsored by Champa Casino.
Hosts: Kid Fury & Crissle
Network: Loud Speakers Network
In this humor-packed and candid episode, Kid Fury and Crissle catch up during mid-Pride Month, bringing their signature shade and pop-culture analysis. The duo covers everything from Black queer joy on Broadway and the latest messy celebrity happenings to personal advice letters delving into family drama, lost friendships, and cross-cultural surprises. Always relatable, the conversation is laced with sharp wit, personal reflections on New York life, and no-nonsense opinions on fame, politics, and identity.
“You make your own happiness in this shithole… Keep those smiles on. Happy Pride.” (01:56)
“It's just so good to see black queer people, you know, on stage doing their damn thing and being recognized for it… It is a ball. It's cats. But a ball.” (05:00)
“Are there tears coming out of my head? I thought that was so sweet.” (03:53)
“She’s not going to act like Palestinian children deserve to die or that ICE is valid in snatching parents. Like, this is insane what this country is doing.” (08:26)
“Hopefully they told her the show is on June 26th at 1...” (17:08)
“He was thunderously booed inside and outside.” (21:21)
“I'm pleasantly shocked. Same. I would have never thought Offset would take up for a woman like that. I would have never thought it.” (31:46)
“Weird way to. You said that in a very incel...right wing podcast kind of way... But all right.” (35:12)
“If this had happened a year ago, I think I would have fallen apart...” (48:00)
“This bitch is crazier than me.” – Kid Fury (49:27)
“If you don't wanna stay there, you don't wanna stay there...Make it about you and the way you like to sleep and rest.” (56:17)
“I would not be making any particular effort to explain, to remedy, to comfort these people. In fact, I would say that that might make it worse.” – Kid Fury (64:22)
“What the fuck is their problem?” – Kid Fury (71:53)
“Tough titties, doll baby. You already knew what time it was...I’ll pack his bags for him.” (86:41)
“You little Fortnite playing doofuses...You’re not real gamers and you’ll never be real gamers.” (88:35)
“I truly believe that that man was not only a bad omen, but he soaked up all of the good energy that had been in this city” (94:22)
“I’m not going to not call myself one because Jennifer Lopez doesn’t think such. Like, outta here. Imagine, of all people, it won’t be you stopping me.” (106:18)
This summary captures all major topics and moments for listeners who missed the episode, keeping the hosts’ distinctive voices and quotable humor front and center.