Today’s episode is exactly what happens when a comedy podcast gets ahold of Coachella band names and absolutely no adult supervision.

The crew dives into a game that should probably never exist again: guessing whether bands are real or completely made up. And here’s the problem—modern band names have gotten so ridiculous that “Diarrhea Planet,” “Horse Girl,” and “Black Moth Super Rainbow” are all REAL… which means our fake ones somehow sound too normal. Things escalate quickly when names like “Velvet Canoe,” “Beef Curtains,” and “Labial Assault” enter the conversation, and suddenly we’re pitching a full-blown fake music festival that honestly might sell out faster than Coachella itself.

Along the way, the show spirals (as it does) into side conversations that make zero sense but feel absolutely necessary. We get into celebrity drama involving Turnstile, break down Nikki Glaser’s very… specific relationship preferences, and somehow transition into early 2000s cartoon nostalgia like it’s a natural progression. (Spoiler: it’s not, but we commit anyway.)

There’s also a healthy dose of Crap on Celebrities, where things range from serious music news to “how did we get here?” faster than you can say “Billy Ocean deep cut.” And yes, we wrap it all up with birthdays, questionable commentary, and a game that forces listeners to risk their dignity for concert tickets—because nothing says comedy podcast like public humiliation for entertainment.

If you came here for a structured, educational experience… you took a wrong turn. But if you’re here for laughs, chaos, and the kind of conversations that feel like your group chat got a radio show, then congratulations—you found your new favorite comedy podcast.

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Coachella Countdown: Goat Girl, Beef Curtains & Band Names That Should Be Illegal