Guest Speaker 1 (5:16)

Everybody has an inner critic. It's just some are much more powerful than others. And so she also taught me to recognize that that wasn't truth.

Lewis Howes (5:27)

The inner critic. Yes.

Guest Speaker 1 (5:28)

Because if you. And being an athlete, I'm sure you know, if you tell yourself it's not Possible. By definition, it is not possible. It cannot happen. And so when people listen to that, they are giving their self agency away. And in some ways, this is the nature of how we take control of our manifestation. And as you know from the first sentence in the book, it says the universe doesn't give a F about you because it has no to give. There is not some external entity deciding your fate because you're a good or a bad guy. But we have immense power within us to control our destiny. And when you give it away and listen to that critic, then you're limiting your beliefs. So the key is, how do you unlimit your beliefs, if you will? And that is understanding the incredible power you have within yourself when you sit there and say every day, I'm not worthy, I don't deserve love, it's not possible, I'm an imposter, I can't do it. It's as if you're building a prison for yourself with bricks. And the wall gets higher and it gets darker and you feel more and more powerless and you feel like there's some external force controlling your life. When you understand within you is an incredible power to change your destiny and you have that power and finally you recognize it, then extraordinary things can happen. And this is how you go from you being in charge, or let's say a belief that others are in charge, to actually you being in charge.

Lewis Howes (7:07)

The key idea here is about overcoming the inner critic by realizing that you hold immense power within you to control your destiny. And this is hard because a lot of us have learned how to have an inner critic that pushes us down, that says, nah, you'll never amount to anything. You're insecure, you're stupid, you're not smart, you're ugly. Whatever insecurity we might have, for whatever reason, our inner critic has trained us to be loud. And until we train something else to overcome that, that is going to be the narrative running inside of our own minds consistently. So many people want more out of life. And I'm sure you want more out of life. More success, more love, more peace, more freedom. But at the same time, they're carrying a quiet belief that says, who do I think I am to have that? Who do I think I am to have a great relationship where someone truly loves me for who I am? Who do I think I am to have financial freedom? Who do I think I am to have a job or a career that is fun and fulfilling for me? Who. Who do I think I am to go after this dream of writing a book or starting a show or doing something crazy that my friends and family are scared of me even talking about. Who am I to think I have the ability to deserve that? That I really deserve that? Have you ever felt this way about anything in your life? Have you ever had this thought? Who do I think I am to have this dream? Leave a comment if you've ever had that thought. Who do I think I am to have that? And that belief doesn't come from the now. It comes from the past, from childhood moments where love felt conditional for you, maybe at different times. From failures that turned into an identity instead of failure being feedback for you, which is what I talk about in the greatness mindset. That failure is something that we should be excited about because it just gives us information, data. It gives you knowledge about what's working and what's not effective. But so many times people take a failure as their own identity, as I am a failure. I'm not smart enough, I'm not good enough, I'm not talented enough, therefore I am a failure. We need to shift that. You need to not think about you as the failure just because you failed at something, because you are going to fail at anything new you do. You failed at trying to walk as a baby a thousand times because. But you never said, I'm a failure and I give up on walking. You failed at talking. It probably took me, I don't know, 16 years to learn how to speak proper English because I was much slower, but now I'm speaking in front of millions of people every single week. You're not a failure just because you fail. We need to shift the identity from the outcome. You need failure to learn the skills and the tools. It gives you the information and the data. So don't make failures to your identity from shame. That taught us to play small and to stay safe. So we learn to prove. We learn to. I'm going to prove them wrong. I'm going to prove all these people. We learn to overwork again, just raise your hand or nod if you've learned to overwork. I know I did that for a long time. We learned to achieve, to feel like, validated. I was a big overachiever. And we learned to perform. I don't know if any of you have ever tried to over perform, to try to get attention and validation. And this is not because we wanted more, but because we were trying to earn the right to feel enough, to feel worthy and to feel enough. And when you don't feel worthy, it shows up in sneaky little Ways I mean this who this lack of worthiness inside of your soul and your heart. Sneaky little things start to show up in your life because you start to settle for less than you actually want. Again, just nod, put your hand up to yourself, Leave a like on this video, leave a comment if this resonates. You settle for less than you actually want. You self sabotage right before things go well. Man, I have experienced that too many times in my own life. But I've also experienced this from just other people around me. I've tried to give so many people great opportunities and they just don't believe in themselves. They just, they're not ready. They don't believe they're worthy and deserving of it and they self sabotage. And this is just only going to hold you back from the blessings that this world, this universe, God is trying to put in front of you. And if there's an opportunity to create something beautiful but you don't feel like you're worthy or deserving of it, you're going to self sabotage.

Rhonda Byrne (12:01)

You're going to.

Lewis Howes (12:02)

You're going to do something that's going to hurt you and hurt the opportunity. You're going to block what's coming for you which only trying to help you. And you've got to be finding a way to overcome this. So here's the shift you need to make. Worthiness is not ego. Worthiness is not thinking you're better than anyone else. That's not what this is about. Worthiness is believing you don't have to punish yourself to deserve a good life. Let me say it again for you. Worthiness is believing you don't have to punish yourself to deserve a good life. And when you can open yourself up to this belief, it allows you to step fully into manifestation number two. You know Donald, I just want to scream out into this canyon and tell the whole world T Mobile's got home Internet. Do it Zack. T Mobile's got home home Internet. Let me try. T Mobile's got home Internet. How much is it? Just 35 bucks a month and it's guaranteed for five years. I'm switching. T Mobile's got home Internet.

Price Pritchett (13:15)

Just 35 bucks a month with autopay.

Lewis Howes (13:17)

And any voice line and it's guaranteed for five years. Access of these applies et mobile.com isp for details and exclusions. The School of Greatness is proudly sponsored by Amica Insurance. It feels good to be understood. Amica goes above and beyond to customize the right coverage for you by taking the time to really understand your Needs. Because creating peace of mind is at the heart of Amica's mission. And whether you're at home or on the road, Amica knows it's not just about where you're going, but who you go with. Go with the insurer that truly understands you as a mutual company. Amica puts its customers needs first. Visit amica.com and get a quote today. And manifestation number two is this. I want you to repeat this. Today, I will act as the person I want to become. Today, I will act as the person I want to become. Now, what does this actually mean? This is where manifestation becomes real. Manifestation is not about wanting. It's about practicing. And you don't attract what you want. You attract what you rehearse every single day. Attraction comes to those that can actually follow through consistently. And I know it can be hard to think about what it means to truly become this new identity. So I want to share this clip from my friend Jim Curtis, because he shares the two powerful words that will make this shift stick.

Jim Curtis (14:45)

The I am is an incredibly powerful thing. First, let's talk about the I am as identity. So our human identity, when we say I am, it becomes reality. Our identity is our reality. So the I am, I am smart, I am successful, I am grateful. I'm going to do this. I'm figuring it out is much different than I am stuck. I am going to be laughed at. I'm not good at this. I'm incapable.

Lewis Howes (15:14)

Right.

Jim Curtis (15:15)

The shift, what you tell your subconscious mind is waiting for directions. So the I am is the most powerful tool to use to direct who you are. The more that you say I am, the more your subconscious mind believes that that's your identity. And your identity creates your reality.

Lewis Howes (15:30)

Say this again. Your subconscious mind is waiting for directions. Is that right?

Jim Curtis (15:34)

100% it is. Your subconscious mind is the servant. Now, it has all the habits. Our conscious mind has all the logic. And we think that our conscious mind is in control. Logically, of course, it has to be. But it represents 5% of everything we do. 95% is in the subconscious mind. Our reflexes, our habits, our autonomic nervous system, our beliefs. So it's waiting. That's why if you get hypnotized up on stage and you say, act like a chicken, and you act like a chicken. And like your subconscious mind just took the direction, the suggestion. So we need to consciously know that our subconscious mind is our servant and to tell it what to do. And we do that through our language and our identity.

Lewis Howes (16:18)

Yeah. Because if someone else can Hypnotize you to dance like a chicken on stage and you do it in front of 10,000 people and not feel fear. Why can't you hypnotize yourself to go pursue your dreams exactly. To chase what you want without feeling that fear as well?

Jim Curtis (16:34)

You can. You can, but we get caught in the cage. We get caught in the illusion that this is all real. The illusion is that everything's happening in our life is real. That's the illusion. The reality is that our identity is creating our reality and our programs and beliefs are creating our reality so that we get caught in the movie. The truth is that we're the director, we're the writer, that we can say, okay, I'm going to change this movie. I'm going to change the movie. And then take massive action to do it so that it shifts the timeline, it shifts the energy. The second part of the I am, maybe the most powerful one, is the I am that I am. The I Am that I am from Was. You don't have to be religious to understand this, but the I am that I am was the first time that God ever really named himself in the Bible. And then the I Am discourses was thought that The Grand Master Saint Germain came to us and dictated these 33 discourses on the I am. And what it basically says is that I am the Source, I am the resurrection, the light. This is. Take the. Take religion out of it. What that means is that everything around us, everything that we are, all this matter, all the light, all the manifestation, all of our reality, all of our thoughts, is this idea that we are the source, the creator, the void, the quantum, the universal mind, the collective consciousness experiencing its own human life through us. We are it. And so if we can understand that we are the Creator and that we can shape what we want, and it starts in this human life, both human and spirit, that we can start to use this I Am that we take for granted. We say that. So the greatest spell of the universe we use so casually that we can take it and start using it. So focusing on the energy expanding into source and then using the words to direct the subconscious.

Lewis Howes (18:39)

How powerful are words that we use about ourself in life?

Jim Curtis (18:44)

So powerful. Our body is listening. Our body is listening to every word that we say. Every word that we say is creating our reality because it creates our identity. We believe it.

Lewis Howes (18:54)

A key takeaway here is the power of the I am. And we have the power to change our reality. Your future self is not someone you have to wake up as one morning Your future self is built through small, daily consistent decisions. How you talk to yourself when you make a mistake, how you respond when fear shows up, how you handle failure without quitting on yourself or believing you are the failure. How you handle success without self sabotaging. Once you have this acknowledgement, this audience, this financial abundance, this accolade, this new position, because no one really teaches you how to handle success. And so therefore a lot of people are afraid of success. This is one of the three key things that limits us. The three main fears that I talk about in the greatness mindset as well. The fear of failure, the fear of success, and the fear of judgment. And this is why confidence doesn't come from thinking positive thoughts. Confidence is built by keeping promises to yourself. The smallest of promises, the biggest of promises, the ones that are small timelines to the ones that take years to fulfill. A promise I made to myself 18 years ago was when I saw handball on TV in the 2008 Olympics and I saw the sport for the first time and I said, what is this sport? This sport was meant for me. I want to figure out how to play this sport, how to get on the USA national team and how to go to the Olympics. And that has been an 18 year commitment I've made to myself. And I have two and a half more years on this timeline of taking it every step along the way as far as I can go, all the way to the end. It's just keeping the promises you make to yourself. And sure, there might be a season where a promise gets broken because a new doorway opens or that doorway shuts and it tells you you're not meant to go there anymore. But when you still have the dream, the desire and the ability to go for it, even when the odds are against you, even when the chances are small, you have to keep your word to yourself. Because confidence is built by keeping promises to yourself. And when I started the School of Greatness, I wasn't a world class interviewer. I had no clue what I was doing. I shouldn't have been able to do what I'm doing now. I was a guy with a laptop and a lot of nerves. But I decided to act like the person who had a top tier show. I showed up early, I researched for hours and I prepared. I acted like the professional I wanted to be before the world called me one. And every time you do what you said you would do, even when it's uncomfortable, this is when you start to build self trust. This is when you start to build this inner confidence this belief that, hey, maybe I can do this. Look what I just created in this month, in this six months, in this year now at the School of Greatness, it's been 13 years. Look what I had to launch, what I had to build, what I had to endure when there were challenging times and downtimes and struggles. And where I'm at at this season, you build self trust when you keep your promises to yourself. And self trust is what allows you to dream bigger and to move bolder and to take chances and to risk at life. This manifestation is a daily commitment to stop waiting and start becoming. Which takes us right into manifestation number three, which manifestation number three is a big one. And I want you to repeat after me what this is. I trust that everything is working for me. I trust that everything is working for me. Or you can say, I trust everything is working in my favor. I trust everything is working in my favor. This manifestation is about faith. Now, you may not like this because you want to have certainty that what you think about is going to happen no matter what, and it's going to be easy. But that's just not what life creates for us. And if everything was easy, you know, it wouldn't be worth it. Sure, we like these things to be easy. It feels good. Because we don't have to have courage. We don't have to endure pain. We don't have to deal with uncertainty. We don't have to. We don't have to have setbacks. Sure, if it was just all handed to us, it wouldn't be called life. This manifestation is about having faith. Not blind faith, not denial, but a deep grounded trust in the process of life. And I know you don't want to hear this, and I know you don't want to hear trust the process, the universe is going to give you everything you need. I know you don't want to hear this. I don't like hearing this either. But gosh, I've just experienced it so many times that when I put trust in the process of life and when I put trust in God and I ask God, where do you need me to be? Which is something that my wife Martha, continues to remind me when I feel friction, when I feel like, ah, why isn't this thing working easier? Why isn't it working out? Why does this process have to be so hard? She says, remember, ask God, and you can ask the universe. If you don't want to ask God, you can say, universe, God, where do you need me to be? And when you have faith and you have A trust in life that everything is working in your favor. When I look back and I think about breaking my wrist and losing my dream of being a professional athlete, sleeping on my sister's couch for a year and a half, making no money during a recession of 2008, 2009, being like, why is this happening to me? Why am I struggling so much? Why is it so hard to make money? Why am I going through all these relationships that are failing? Why am I dealing with so much internal suffering? Why? Why? Why? I had all of these seasons of life where I was just questioning, why is this happening to me? As I've learned and I've reflected and like, oh, I want to have this incredible marriage with these two beautiful twins. Had to not learn those lessons in those challenging relationships, I would not have the tools emotionally to navigate where I'm at now. I wouldn't have the business skills. If I wasn't broke for those almost two years where I had to learn the hard way about certain things and find mentors, I wouldn't have been ready for what I'm creating now. We need those seasons of uncertainty, of scarcity, of sadness, of loss. We need those in some ways to enrich us, to develop the soil within us, to start creating a richer life. But if we don't have a deep grounded trust in the process of life or in the trust of God, and if we don't say God, where do you need me to be now? This is where I want to be, so make it easy for me. If that's where he needs you to be, cool. If that's where the universe wants you to be, the best use of your abilities and your talents, cool. But sometimes you get rerouted. A relationship doesn't work out, A career doesn't work out. Something happens where it reroutes you, it puts you in a different direction. And I know that's happened for you. I know you've had setbacks. I know you've gone through a relationship breakup. I know you've had an injury that forced you to stop a certain career or dream or something, but it's led you into a beautiful season of life. And when you can reflect back and see, oh, yeah, okay, now that makes sense. If we just trust the process of life, when things are going challenging and we ask, where do you need me to be? Then we start to hear better, we start to listen better, we start to communicate better, we start to develop better. Because when you don't trust life, you try to control everything. You overthink things, you force Timelines, you need them to happen now. You panic when things don't move fast enough. Nod your head if this is resonating with you or if I'm the only one who's ever been through that. And control, let's be honest, it is exhausting. Sure, I like having a sense of control. I like knowing that I can run my business a certain way. I can structure my time with my workouts at a certain time. I can do certain things and have a schedule and an organized life. But controlling outcomes and controlling everything and everyone in your life, it's exhausting and it doesn't work. You cannot control everything and everyone. Control keeps your body tense. Control keeps your mind busy and loud. Control makes it hard to hear your own intuition and to hear the message from the universe or the message from God on what God or the universe wants you and needs you to do. Trust doesn't you know it's not going to hurt you. It does the opposite. Trust creates a sense of peace, and peace creates clarity. Clarity leads to better decision making. It makes better decision making because now you're in alignment again. We go back to the first one. You got to be in alignment. When you're in alignment, then you know what to make decisions on better. You can make clearer decisions because you're now in alignment. You're not going off track based on you. And I want you to look back at your life and you'll probably see this, that some of the things that were most upsetting about losing, about hurt, about pain, ended up making room for something better in your life. Right? Some relationship that, man, this was like years. We're trying to make it work and then it ended. It was just miserable. And we lost all this time, and then, boom, you met the person of your dreams within the next year or it unlocked the next season for you. Some doors have to close because they were too small for who you were becoming. Some of these old doors in my life, they needed to close. And because I lacked the courage to close them myself out of fear, they were smacked clothes in my face and I had to experience more pain because I wasn't willing to go through the challenges that I knew I was meant to do them. And trust doesn't mean you always are going to understand why something's happening. In fact, you're probably not going to understand a lot of these things. Maybe 20, 30 years down the road, it'll make sense. But it does mean you believe there is meaning, even when you're not sure of what it is. And you're in the middle of the mess. That's what it's all about. Again, I mentioned earlier about, you know, I had a dream of being a professional athlete. I made it to the Arena Football League. I was getting paid. I was living my dream, playing in front of thousands of people, catching a football. This was my childhood dream. And then all of a sudden, boom. I run into the wall trying to catch a football. I break my wrist. After the season, I have a surgery on my wrist. They take a bone out of my hip, they put it in my wrist. I'm in a cast for six months. And it wasn't fun. It wasn't pretty. It was exhausting. It was painful. I had 15 staples in my hip that I had to remove eventually. And the dream was over. Like that. Boom. No more football, no more dream. You know, 15 years of pursuing this thing, gone in a moment. It felt unfair. It didn't feel. It was like, what's the point of this? Why am I being punished? Why is this happening to me? I worked so hard for this dream. I sacrificed so much. I did all the right things to get here. Why me? Why now? And I get chills just thinking about it. If. If I knew that something was greater for me coming, then I probably wouldn't have resisted it as much and been as depressed for as long as that I was going through that transition. Now, listen, it doesn't mean when something's bad is happening in your life or you're going through a. You get fired from a job or a relationship ends or whatever it might be, it doesn't mean you can't feel the range of emotions of sadness, grief, loss, uncertainty, fear, concerns. It's okay. We're human beings. It's normal. But when we can get back on the train of positive thinking and manifestation around alignment and say, I trust the timing of my life, this is happening for me. It's happening for a reason. And it's so hard in the moment because it doesn't make sense. But if I just tried it on, if I just said, I'm going to trust this anyways, I want to trust. What am I meant to do? What's next for me? Why is this happening? Let me understand the reason why. Let me develop better skills. Let me be more emotionally empathetic. Let me use this tragedy for good. When you can do that, man, then you start to, boom, transform into something special. And when I started to do that, instead of loathing on my sister's couch for a year and a half, I started to take action. I started to take action. I started to learn new skills. I started to reach out to mentors. I started reading books. I started creating content. I started writing because I had a dream to be a New York Times bestselling author. So I started practicing and the next eight years became a practice for me to launch the New York Times bestselling book, to launch the show, to launch the business. It was just practicing and failure over and over again. But that failure became feedback and became little belief and micro belief into bigger beliefs. So I need you to start thinking about that. If you're going through a hard time in your life right now, what does trust look like for you? When you're in the middle of uncertainty, what does it look like for you? The School of Greatness is brought to you in partnership with Airbnb. The start of a new year always feels like a reset for me. It's time to reflect, set intentions and plan what the year ahead is going to look like. And Martha and I both love traveling quite a bit throughout the year, visiting family and carving out time to recharge. So we often are on the move once things kick back into rhythm after the holidays. And some of the best parts of traveling come from experiencing new places, discovering local food and getting a real feel for a community. And what I realize is that whenever people travel, their homes usually just sit there empty. Hosting your home on Airbnb can be a simple way to put that space to good use and share what makes your neighborhood special with people who are passing through. From our experience, hosting has always been easy and straightforward. And whether you travel often or just once in a while, hosting your home on Airbnb can be an easy way to bring in some extra cash during times you're already gone. As well, your home might be worth more than you think. Find out how much@airbnb.com host as a small business owner, once I prioritize maximizing my time by automating the details, it changed everything. Outdoit with intuit QuickBooks QuickBooks is the trusted end to end solution that businesses rely on for those backend details to keep things running. With QuickBooks you get a team of AI agents and trusted experts, so doing it yourself no longer means doing it alone. Their payment agent gets you paid faster, the customer agent finds leads, follows up and secures more sales, and the accounting agent automates and categorizes transactions. Get your critical business jobs done with QuickBooks on the Intuit platform, and that leads us into the next manifestation, which is manifestation number four. Today I choose Courage over comfort. Today I choose courage over comfort. Every great life requires courage. Gosh, I did not like having courage when I was younger. It was just really hard for me. Even in my 20s, it was really hard. Heck, 30s, it was really hard. Now that I'm in my early 40s, I feel like I've went through so much pain because I lacked emotional courage to have the hard conversations, to make decisions I know I needed to make. But I delayed as long as I could because I didn't want to experience that pain. Man, Courage, it is an incredible gift you will give yourself. If you can get comfortable being courageous every single day in every single way, it doesn't mean it's going to be fun or enjoyable, but, man, you're going to live such a better life. Every great life requires courage. Not just once, but over and over and over again. In every area of your life, every relationship, it requires courage. If you want to have a better relationship, everything you do requires courage. And my friend Price Pritchett talks about this concept of being antifragile. And I want you to watch this right here. It's powerful, you know, but talking about.

Price Pritchett (36:40)

This thing about we need friction in our life. Too much equilibrium is a dangerous thing. But people get. It's kind of that status quo. Nassim, Nicholas Talib wrote this book. He's written several fool by Randomness, the Black Swan. And he wrote this book called Antifragile. I love that book. Now, that book is that thick. And he is an amazingly smart guy. But he talks about how some things benefit from being punched around, from friction, from setbacks, failures, you know, stretch and stretch and putting yourself out there and taking the blows, the slings and errors of life, you know, as opposed to sitting in your house, you know, lean back in the. Watching TV all the time. And he says, okay, here's. Here's a good way to picture it. Let's say that you have a box of fine crystal Baccarat crystal champagne glasses, and you're going to send them to Prague. Some friend in Prague. Okay, so how do you package? You package these very, very carefully, and then close the box and you stamp all over it. Handle with care. Fragile, fragile, fragile. Handle with care. Okay, but let's say you. Because it gets damaged by friction, we'll say, or turbulence, change. Well, let's say that you've got a basketball. You're going to send it to Prague. So you put it in a box. Same what package it. You know, throw it in there and everything. If it gets slammed around the Box kind of crust.

Lewis Howes (38:38)

Okay.

Price Pritchett (38:38)

The ball is resilient.

Lewis Howes (38:40)

Yes.

Price Pritchett (38:40)

The ball comes back and so forth. No damage to the ball. It's right back the way it was. But if you have something else that benefits from change, from turbulence, from friction, you would put it in there. You wouldn't put any packing around it or anything. And you'd stamp on the outside, throw.

Lewis Howes (39:06)

It around, throw it around, you know.

Price Pritchett (39:08)

Sling it this way, whatever. It's antifragile and it's good for it to get that.

Guest Speaker 1 (39:15)

Well.

Price Pritchett (39:17)

That'S what we need to make ourselves. We need to make ourselves anti fragile and that means we need to create this disequilibrium in our own lives. We need to stretch, we need to do things that are kind of difficult for us. And then we become less fragile. Yeah, we become better than resilient. We grow from it.

Lewis Howes (39:41)

Yes.

Price Pritchett (39:42)

We don't just get back to we were. We get better.

Lewis Howes (39:47)

We become different. We become a different person.

Price Pritchett (39:49)

Yeah, that's. That's one thing about the difference between small goals and big goals. There's a lot that's been written about the small goals, you know, little bitty goals. And I'm, I'm. First of all, I'm just a massive believer in setting goals for your life. Small goals are good for to do list or if you're trying to develop a habit and some of those kinds of things. But small goals create small energy.

Lewis Howes (40:25)

They.

Price Pritchett (40:25)

Attract small resources.

Lewis Howes (40:29)

And.

Price Pritchett (40:31)

They'Re very, very incremental. Big goals create energy. They stir you up, they make you more creative, they attract other people. People want to be part of it. And so when you set big goals, you don't just achieve more, you become more.

Lewis Howes (40:58)

A key takeaway from this is you benefit from friction. It forces you to grow and change and develop over and over again. Small goals create small energy. Big goals create bigger energy. You don't only achieve more, you become more. And that's what this is about. It's not about achievement. It's not about making more money. Those things are to come. All that stuff is going to come. The accolades, the awards, the success, the followers, the sales, the growth, the money, the ba ba ba ba ba ba ba. All these things are going to come, but stop thinking about just them. Sure, it's great to have goals of what you want to accomplish and achieve. I do that as well. But more importantly, you want to be thinking about who you want to become. Who do you want to become on this journey? If you're insecure right now, then your goal should be, I want to become more confident. I want to become more empowered in my body when I'm normally insecure, whether it's around speaking with friends or colleagues or on stages, I want to become more confident. Well, to overcome insecurity, that means you have to put yourself in situations where you feel insecure over and over again and practice and overcome it. And over time you will be more confident in those things. That is how I have done everything in my life. Because I was the most insecure kid growing up. I was in the bottom of my class. I felt stupid, I felt unworthy, I didn't want to be alive. I would get into trouble and I'd go to the principal's office and I'd say, I wish I were dead. I wish I were dead. I wish I were dead. I would repeat this over and over again because I would get in trouble so often because I just struggled so much in school that I didn't have the emotional tools to be like, you know, in 30 years, it's all going to work out. As an eight year old and you know, this is all happening for you. And even though you have no friends, you get into trouble all the time. You can't pass any classes because you're not smart enough to pass any classes. This is all my internal critic. But it was validated by having the worst grades and no friends and people laughing at me and picking on me and picking me last and all these things. So I was so insecure. The past kept me feeling insecure. And when I created a game plan for myself, when sports came into my life and I started to find ways that I could be more confident, I found a tool. Sports. Sports became life. It's where I learned everything about life by playing sports. You've got to find out what that tool is for you. Where is the gift that you are excited about that you want to get better in? Is that art? Is that drawing? Is that music? Is that sports? Is that, is that content? Whatever it is, is it relationship advice? Is it money? Is it health and wellness? What is that tool that you can lean on to build some confidence in your life? And then how can you find the things you are most insecure and make those things that you are the most confident in? For example, I could not speak on stage to save my life if I had to stand up in front of the class, you know, 20 kids and read aloud. When I would do that, I would sweat, I would tremble, I would stutter because kids would make fun of me because I could not read. When I went into eighth grade, I had a second grade reading level based on the test that they gave me. So I just struggled. So it meant I was very insecure. I had no confidence in doing that skill. Now when I turn 24, 25, I'm sleeping on my sister's couch and I'm a grown adult, but still a little boy inside. You know, I'm a 24, 25 year old man with the insecurities of a five year old boy. I remember thinking to myself, huh, in order to get any job, I need to have confidence being able to speak in front of a boss, someone hiring me, my colleagues, a boardroom setting, whatever it might be. I need to learn how to communicate effectively, to be able to enroll people in who I am, in my abilities, in what I'm presenting. I need to be able to enroll people, but I have no abilities on how to do this right now. I can't do it. I couldn't do it at 25. And so what I did is I found a mentor who is someone who is a speaker professionally, someone essentially doing what I wanted to learn how to do. The confidence to speak professionally in front of others. I didn't know I was going to be speaking professionally in the future, but I wanted to have the skill set to be able to communicate effectively without fear or insecurity. And he said, join Toastmasters. Go once a week for a year and report back to me at the end. Toastmasters is an international organization. I think it's like 50 to 100 bucks a year to be a member. And you get a workbook that gives you 10 different speech exercises that you have to complete over the year. And each one is about five to seven minutes long of a speech. And you need to complete them to develop skills. It just gives you practice in front of a group setting where you can hear other people speak, you can speak and practice your speaking ability. And I remember I joined one of these clubs in Columbus, Ohio called Midday Toastmasters. And it was terrifying. It was the scariest thing that I've probably ever done in my life. And I got up every single week and I practiced speaking. And I was the worst person in the room. They were all professionals. They'd all wore suits. I was wearing like a T shirt. I was like a, you know, just got out of. I had a cast on in my first few sessions because I was still recovering from the surgery. And it was terrifying. It was humiliating, it was embarrassing. It was so uncomfortable. But every week I showed up, I would record the speeches, I would watch them Back I had someone help give me feedback, and I just said, how can I be a little bit better and practice the skill every single week? By the end of that year, I was getting paid to speak on stages. Now, it wasn't tons of money at that time, but I was making around $500 to speak because I just went all in on improving the ability to communicate in front of others. And I remember I practiced for two weeks to give my first speech. I kid you not. I was so nervous. Just thinking about the idea of getting in front of 20 people made me nervous for weeks leading into it. And I wrote my speech word for word, and I looked down and I just read my speech the whole time. I didn't look up once in my first speech, but I did it. I showed up, I built a rep. I showed myself. I can humiliate myself and get through it. And then each week, I got better, and I practiced and I improved, and that helped me build confidence. But we can't create just these tiny little goals because, again, like Price Pritchett said, you benefit from friction. It forces you to grow and change. Small goals create small energy. Big goals create bigger energy. And you don't only achieve more, you become more. I wasn't trying to make tons of money as a speaker. Now my speaking fees are multiple six figures for me to speak in front of an audience for 60 minutes. And if you would have told me this when I was 25, 17, 18 years ago, if you'd have told me this, I'd have been like, you are out of your mind. There is no chance. But I just kept showing up for myself to become more, not necessarily to accomplish more, to become less insecure. And when you make a commitment to go all in on your fears, your fears will eventually disappear. And that's what you need to be thinking about. You need to be thinking about what is the list of fears or insecurities that I can make my superpower. If you are insecure and you're afraid to speak and use your voice, it means you are meant to be a communicator. It means you are meant to guide people. It means you are meant to use your voice to bring hope, to bring inspiration, to bring positive encouragement to someone. But you've got to learn how to do that for yourself first. Comfort feels safe, but comfort also keeps you stuck. Comfort tells you to stay quiet, to avoid the hard conversation, to not rock the boat. Don't put yourself out there too much. Courage is different. Courage is feeling fear and moving toward it anyway. Courage is being seen when you'd rather hide because you don't want to be embarrassed. And I'm telling you, when I went all in on the speaking, when I went all in on the podcast, when I didn't know what I was doing, it unlocked incredible things for my business. But when I went all in on the thing that I was truly the most afraid of, which was opening up about sexual trauma that I experienced when I was a kid, and I opened up about it publicly on my podcast, I thought my life was going to be over. I thought I would have no friends. I thought my business would be done. But I felt like it's something I needed to do. I needed to practice the courage and share. And I was like, if I can help one man who's been through some type of sexual abuse in the past, or one woman who's experienced this, who's been living in shame, who's been living quietly in fear, who's been traumatized over and over again because they've been living with this stress in their life, this trauma in their life, and it's been stuck in their body. If I could help one person, then it's worth it. And I did a whole episode about this over 10 years ago, and it completely changed my life. And I got hundreds of essays that people wrote in saying thank you and then starting their healing journey in that as well. And then it led to a book that I wrote called the Mask of Masculinity, which was about the. The masks that men wear to fit in, to try to belong, to try to look good, to perform, to, you know, survive when trauma or a violation has happened. And I started understanding the mask that I wore for most of my life. To perform, to achieve, to try to feel loved, needed, and worthy. But really deep down inside, I didn't feel worthy at all. I was running away from the past, chasing things to try to make myself feel better. And no matter how much I achieved, I still never felt enough. And so what you really need to understand is that courage is not a personality trait. It's a daily decision. And saying this manifestation to yourself every day allows you to make that decision easier and easier. Every time you choose courage, you are creating more opportunity for yourself, which leads us right into manifestation number five. Imagine never buying gas again. Just plug in your car like you plug in your phone. That's the power of driving electric. It's not just good for the planet, it's actually more convenient and more affordable. I've actually been driving a Tesla for a couple of years. Now and I love it. I can charge it overnight in my garage and when I'm on the go, I hit a fast charger and I'm back on the road in no time. No gas stops, no oil changes, just smooth, quiet, reliable drives. EVs are built for real life, with daily range that lets you go wherever you need to go without worrying. And the savings, up to $2,000 a year just by skipping the gas pump. And with over 100 new and used EV models available right now, there's truly something for every lifestyle and budget. The way forward is electric. Learn more@electricforall.org okay, so now that Martha and I are expecting, we've been having a lot of fun dreaming up the perfect nursery setup. Well, she's been dreaming it up more than me, but I've been supporting her in that dream. And everyone has a different dream for their home. For some, it's a dining room ready for big, lively gatherings. For others, it's a cozy and intimate retreat. And IKEA's wide selection makes every kind of dream possible. From full kitchen remodels to the perfect finishing touch, IKEA has it all, including the gear to build a dream podcast studio like sound absorbing panels. Find your big dreams, small dreams and cozy retreat dreams in store or online at ikea.us dream the possibilities and I need you to repeat this manifestation to yourself. Today I am open to receive what is meant for me. Today I am open to receive what is meant for me. Now, if you've made it this far in this episode and maybe you've been critical about what is all these, you know, manifestations that Lewis is talking about, I'm going to see if this is all just BS or some mumbo jumbo or whatever it might be. If you have a mantra in your life and you say, today I am open to receive what is meant for me, it's just saying I'm creating space for the right things to come into my life. And instead of mentally blocking yourself and saying I don't deserve or self sabotaging because you don't believe you're worthy, you're just creating a block and you're walking through life with a filter of negativity and you're not allowing for goodness to come into your life, but if you simply repeat and believe and own this one manifestation, today I am open to receive what is meant for me. If you wake up and say this to yourself. If you walk out the door and say this to yourself, if you're driving in your car and you just say Today I'm open to receive what is meant for me. And only good things come my way. You're going to find good things coming your way. You're going to find beautiful things coming your way. And a lot of people are trying to manifest, but they're closed off to possibilities. They're so fixated on one specific outcome, one specific goal, one specific path. It has to look like this. They can't see the opportunity sitting right in front of them. So they've decided what success is supposed to look like by maybe pressure from their parents or what their peers do or what they feel like is cool or whatever it might be. And without realizing it, they've shut the door on something bigger, something more lines, something they couldn't even have dreamed of again. When one door closes, it's opening the possibility for something much greater that was meant for you. But it's so hard when we're fixated on keeping that door open that we really thought was supposed to work out. But when you have the trust in the previous manifestation and you have the belief that something great is going to happen today that is meant for me, then, man, good things are always coming my way. Good things are always coming my way. Great things come to me every single day. A lot of people are working hard, but they're working alone. They're carrying everything themselves. Let me know in the comments or just nod to yourself right now. If you feel like you put the weight of the world on your back and it just is carrying this tense load and you feel like your shoulders are always tight because you feel like you have to hold up this emotional baggage. It is exhausting. Let yourself relax. Stop trying to carry everything yourself. People are trying to force the timeline, trying to just, I need this to happen now. They're stuck in the mentality of if I don't do it, it won't get done. But receiving is not weakness. Receiving is trust. Receiving is believing that life can meet you in ways that you did not expect. And it could surprise you if you allow it. If you allow for the abundance, if you allow for the support, if you allow for the possibilities to just make magic in your life, life becomes magical. Receiving is allowing for people, conversations, instructions and opportunities to move you forward instead of you pushing everything forward alone. And I want to share a piece of my conversation recently that I had with Rhonda Byrne and she talks all about the need to be more open to the will of the universe. Let's watch this right here.

Rhonda Byrne (58:08)

It's a piece of cake, really. Yeah. And I think one of the reasons that one of the things that trips people up is they try to. Too hard. Like, they're trying too hard. But, you know, we deserve everything that we could possibly want. And so there's no, you know, the universe to be. To put it, you know, sweetly kind of. The universe wants us to have everything and to live a full life. And so, yeah, it's not a battle or anything like that. So I think sometimes we just, like, try too hard. And trying, of course, says that I don't have it yet.

Guest Speaker 1 (58:50)

Really.

Price Pritchett (58:50)

Yeah.

Lewis Howes (58:51)

Isn't there something around, like, I guess, putting an effort or putting in focus or putting in some energy to developing a skill so that you can receive more of what you want? Or is it really as simple as just kind of let it go and allow things to come to you as. As they come?

Rhonda Byrne (59:05)

Well, I think if you, you know, with a skill like you, you know, you can't just pick up a violin and be a maestro. Right, right. So. And those kinds of things we all tend to love anyway, learning things and accomplishing things and building, you know, businesses and all of those kinds of things, but we do not. We certainly do not need to put as much effort into all of that. Like it.

Price Pritchett (59:32)

Everything.

Rhonda Byrne (59:33)

Everything is coming from the mental first. First. Whether we realize it or not, it is. Every action we take is a thought first. Every word we speak is a thought first. And so if we did more mental preparation before we took an action, that action would be so smooth and just flow, you know, and that's kind of the part that in the future, civilization will definitely realize and get really good at. And there's an opportunity for people to get really good at it now. So life's not so hard. Go big.

Price Pritchett (60:07)

Think big.

Rhonda Byrne (60:09)

You know, what have you got to lose? Think big. Go on. You know, and you can put lots of small things, you know, there too. You know, I want a new pair of Nikes or I want this, or, you know, small things. But yeah, think big things. Because one of the tricky things, I think, with people is they haven't ever stopped to think about what they want because they think they can't have it. And so to think about what they want is too painful, you know, so they don't. They don't do a list. That's the last thing they want to do.

Lewis Howes (60:37)

It seems so far away.

Rhonda Byrne (60:38)

It seems so far away and impossible. And it's just gonna make me feel bad that I can never have it because I was born here. You know, I don't get those Lucky breaks. Like the person over here that's really lucky.

Price Pritchett (60:50)

And.

Rhonda Byrne (60:51)

Yeah. So that's why it's so great to write a list. Because for many people who follow this, I bet they've never written a list before of what they want. No limits. Yeah.

Lewis Howes (61:05)

A friend and mentor of mine who told me, you know, he grew up without a lot of money. He lived in Southern California, but he was probably two hours away from the ocean. But he always dreamed of, like, having a house by the beach and the ocean. And he's like, when I was in my 20s, I would just visit the ocean and look at the houses. Then when I started to make a little money, I still so far away from affording it, but I was like, what if I just rent the house for a day to experience what it's like being in that kind of property, looking out on the beach. And I think the closer we can get to dreaming it by writing it down and making a wish list and then getting closer to the experience. Even if you just touch it, touch the car you want to buy, touch the house that you want to live into, or rent the house for a night, you can't buy the whole thing, but it's like, rent something like it and see what that experience feels like for a day, for an hour, for a moment. You can go on Sunset Boulevard and rent a Ferrari for 30 minutes if you want to, you know, for 100 bucks. Experience the feeling. Right. Get around the feeling.

Rhonda Byrne (62:06)

So good.

Lewis Howes (62:07)

I love this quote that said, the universe wants us to have everything and to live a full life. It's not a battle. People haven't stopped to think about what they want because they think they can have it. And this manifestation is about releasing the need to control the how. How is this going to happen? How am I going to make this? How is this going to be done by the time I want it? You may know the direction, but you don't always know the route. And sometimes the route that actually gets you there looks nothing like what you thought should be doing yourself. It's not the exact path that you wanted, but it still gets you there. And sometimes what you're asking for, it doesn't arrive at all or not as exactly how you requested it. It arrives as a conversation you almost didn't take. It arrives as a location that you almost didn't go to, an event that you were going to say no to, and you went last minute, and then, boom. The person you needed to meet, the thing you needed to hear, the sign that you needed to see. Oh, man, it just came to you and it reminds you to keep going. It's almost like as an invitation you almost said no to. I know you've experienced this. If you're here so far in this episode, this means it's resonating with you. Like this has happened for you before. And this is a reminder for you. It might have shown up in your life as, like, a delay. Like, you had to wait in line longer, you missed the bus and you were delayed, or that flight got canceled, and you're like, oh, why did this happen to me? But it forces you to slow down and something else comes your way. That's another sign. It could be a redirection that takes you off your plan and onto a better one. But you only notice these moments when you're open, when you're not clinging and putting the weight of the world and the responsibilities on your back constantly and feeling stressed and just keeping your head down. It's like when you're not clinging to how it's supposed to happen. Things will start to unfold when you're willing to say, this may not be what I plan for, but let me pay attention to what it's trying to show me. Receiving requires humility. It requires a letting go, a surrender. And that's hard to do. It's not enjoyable to say, I surrender, Just show me the way. It's not easy. It requires you to let go of the identity that says, I have to do this all by myself. And it requires you to trust that support doesn't diminish you. It expands you. So this manifestation is not about waiting. It's about awareness. It's about staying present to what life is offering, not just about what you are chasing. So say this with an open heart. Today, I am open to receive what is meant for me. And beautiful things come my way, even if it doesn't look like what I thought I wanted. Beautiful things come my way. Even if it requires me to change direction. Beautiful things come my way. Even if it comes through other people. Beautiful things come my way. These are not just words we're talking about here. These are daily practices. This is a way of being this. These are daily reminders of who you're becoming. I want you to say them. I want you to feel them. I want you to live them. Because when your words, your beliefs, and your actions match and align, your life will expand in beautiful ways. Your life will change. You will evolve. One day, one decision, one manifestation at a time. If you've enjoyed this, please like it up. Leave a comment of what resonated for you. Because I believe that you are deserving and worthy of a beautiful, rich, abundant life. One of peace, one of harmony, one of powerful, beautiful relationships. One that brings you a lot of joy. But you've got to get in alignment with yourself first. You've got to start acting upon these five manifestations. I believe you're worthy and deserving of a beautiful, rich life. But you've got to be willing to act upon these five manifestations on a consistent basis and we're all going to go off track at times. No one's perfect here. I'm not asking you to be perfect, but I am asking you to practice these things daily to the best of your ability and watch what unfolds. Watch what unfolds in the next few days. If you say these five things just for three days in a row, I want you to see how you act differently, how your energy shifts, how things start to come your way, how synchronicities, signs, conversations lead you into the path that you desire. And again, I want to remind you if no one's told you lately that you are worthy, you are loved, and you matter. I hope you enjoyed today's episode and it inspired you on your journey towards greatness. Make sure to check out the show notes in the description for a full rundown of today's episode with all the important links and if you want weekly exclusive bonus episodes with me personally as well as ad free listening. Then make sure to subscribe to our greatness+channel exclusively on Apple Podcasts. Share this with a friend on social media and leave us a review on Apple Podcasts as well. Let me know what you enjoyed about this episode in that review. I really love hearing feedback from you and it helps us figure out how we can support and serve you moving forward. And I want to remind you if no one has told you lately that you are loved, you are worthy, and you matter. And now it's time to go out there and do something great. He's Kenny Maine, the funny guy from espn. Formerly, he's Cooper Manning, the more intelligent and handsome of the Manning brothers. And he's Brian Baumgartner. But to me he'll always be Kevin from the Office. Yeah, you and everybody else together. We're the hosts of the new comedy golf podcast we need a fourth from Smartless Media and SiriusXM. It's like a cold beer after a round. You hear the strangest and most bizarre golf stories from our friends and athletes, celebrities and comedians. It's all about how much we love golf and how much we hate golf. New episodes are out every week. Listen now and subscribe wherever you get your podcast could just be anywhere, just on a couch. Doesn't matter.

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