← The School of Greatness
The School of Greatness
Tabitha Brown: What Happens When You Finally Stop Pretending
01:07:47
This conversation will change how you see the person staring back at you in the mirror. You'll discover why the thing you've been hiding might be exactly what the world needs to see.
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- [00:02]
A
Ah.
- [00:03]
B
As I step into 2026, one of my big wellness goals is consistency showing up from my body, my mindset, my help every single day, even when life feels overwhelming. And that is why I love simple habits that support the bigger picture for my life. And starting off the new year strong with protein beverages at Starbucks is a big thing because. Because Starbucks now offers a whole lineup of delicious protein beverages, including the brand new caramel protein latte, caramel protein Matcha, and new protein drinks with no sugar added. This is huge. You can even add protein, cold foam or protein boosted milk to your favorite drink. So getting extra protein, it's naturally into your routine. My go to is the iced vanilla protein latte. It is so, so good at Starbucks.
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A
Ooh.
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B
That first sip feeling is amazing. Bold signature espresso with protein boosted milk and sweet vanilla flavor. This is amazing. And what's so crazy is a grande has 29 grams of protein. I mean, talk about staying consistent with your wellness goals. Now my morning iced latte can make it feel effortless to hit my protein target. For me, this is just one of those small moments every day that starts it off right a little bit stronger and knowing I've gotten protein in my drink as well. So make sure to level up and add protein to your favorite drink at Starbucks. With the US Bank Smartly Visa Signature Card, you earn an unlimited 2% cash back on every purchase. No quarterly activations, no categories to Track, just unlimited 2% cash back on every purchase. I know there's someone out there who just spent way too much on a fancy smoothie that tastes just okay. And they didn't even get 2% cash back. You hate to see it. Visit usbank.com smartly card to learn more. The creditor and issuer of this card is U.S. bank National Association. Pursuant to a license from Visa USA Inc. Some restrictions may apply. The best B2B marketing gets wasted on the wrong people. So when you want to reach the right professionals, use LinkedIn ads. LinkedIn has grown to a network of over 1 billion professionals, including 130 million decision makers. That's why LinkedIn has the highest B2B ROAs of all online ad networks. Spend $250 on your first campaign on LinkedIn ads and get a free $250 credit for the next one. Just go to LinkedIn.comlewis that's LinkedIn.comlewis. terms and conditions apply. Welcome back, everyone to the School of Greatness. Very excited about our guest. We have the inspiring Tabitha Brown in the house. So good to See you.
- [02:43]
A
Very good. Thank you.
- [02:44]
B
Welcome. Welcome to the show. It's been amazing to watch your journey, specifically over the last five years, just kind of expand and explode in a positive, powerful way. And we were just talking off camera about how when you fully stepped into who you authentically were, that's when everything started to expand.
- [03:04]
A
Yeah.
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B
And you started to attract the right things for your life. You started to magnify your audience and community. You started to expand financially, relationally with positive abundance. And I think it's really cool that this all happened for you. And I'm curious, your new book, it's called I Did a new thing, 30 days to living Free. I'm curious, what was the thing that set you free to create more abundance in your life in a positive way?
- [03:34]
A
Oh, I think the thing that set me free. You know my story. I was sick, right, for quite some time, about a year and seven months. And I really thought in that dark season, because, you know, I was seeking. Doctors can tell me what was wrong with me. They were doing, you know, running tests all the time and giving me guinea pig medication is what I would call it, because they can diagnose you, but try this and see if you feel better. Right. You fall into this depression, which I did, because it's like, I know something's not right with my body. I know I don't feel normal, and they can't tell me anything. Right. And I thought God had forgotten about me. And so I think when I got to that lowest point, I was like, you know, I'm from North Carolina. I grew up in the church, and I used to be this person, and I still am, who was excited to be a woman of faith, Right. And I was like, here I am really thinking, like, I have all this faith, but I feel like God has left me, really. And so I was like, okay, Lord, this time. Because what I also realized was I was habitually praying. And that means I was just praying out of habit. But I wasn't really meaning or believing what I was saying.
- [04:50]
B
Can you give me an example?
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A
You know, how you grow up? And it's like, just for example, like, God is great. God is good. Let us thank him for this food, Right? You taught that as a kid on how to pray for your food. That's a habit that we pick up.
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B
It wasn't an intention.
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A
It wasn't intentional feeling it. Like, even. Even though I was praying, God, please help me to feel better. God, please heal me. Like, I was just seeing it because it's like, oh, this is what we do at church. So I realized, like, oh, wait, I need to unlearn how to habitually pray, and I really need to seek him truly and let him have me.
- [05:24]
B
Wow.
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A
Right.
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B
What's the difference between habitual prayer and seeking God and faith and allowing him to be inside of you?
- [05:32]
A
The difference is habitually you're taught. I was taught how to pray that way. I was taught how to. To be a person of faith. I was taught how to go to church, how to worship. But when I say God, I'm a strip me clean. My prayer was, God, if you heal me, you can have me.
- [05:53]
B
Wow.
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A
That meant I'm not going to do it my way anymore. And how I was taught, I'm going to do it the way you created me to do it. That meant I'm going to allow you to deposit inside of me like only you can. Nobody else will get this credit or the glory for it. Right. And so that's what got me free. I started taking layers off. And when I prayed that prayer, I was in my bathroom, I remember, and my prayer was, God, if you heal me, you can have me. Something changed that day. I can't explain it. I just felt different. I wasn't healed in the moment, but when I left the bathroom, I felt different. And from that day, I've just been taking layers off ever since and allowing myself to be who God has called me to be. Wow. So, yeah.
- [06:43]
B
Do you feel like you were sick physically and depressed, emotionally or mentally because you were out of alignment with who you were meant to be?
- [06:51]
A
Absolutely. I definitely think that plays a huge, huge role in it. I think that I also have a gift. Right. So we all have gifts. I was born with the gift of where I can dream things that come to pass. I see things, I can hear things. And I remember a time when I tried to pray that away because it was scary growing up that way. And, you know, people thinking you crazy because you can dream something and tell them and then it happens or you see something and you tell them. It wasn't a fun gift to have as a kid or as a young adult. Right. But I remember I went like a good. Felt like about six years where I prayed like, God, I don't want this anymore. And when I didn't have it as often, it felt like I was missing a part of it.
- [07:37]
B
Wow.
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A
Right. But what I realized is when I would have a dream and I'm supposed to give a message to somebody, if I didn't, I would get sick.
- [07:49]
B
Wow.
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A
I would not. Like, I Would get nauseous, My head would spin. I would have to lay down. But the moment I got it out, I'd be completely fine.
- [07:58]
B
So you had a lot of premonitory dreams or.
- [08:00]
A
Yeah, like, just. It's crazy.
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B
Like a vision or like a message.
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A
I can dream it while I'm asleep or sometime while I'm awake. Like, right now, I'm looking at you, and then something it appear right beside you. I cannot control it. It just happens.
- [08:12]
B
Wow.
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A
But, like, sometimes it's like a movie screen, like a little box, and I could see something play out. Sometimes it's an actual. Just a vision. Just as clear as you sitting there. You can sit right here.
- [08:24]
B
Wow.
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A
And when you wouldn't speak it, When I won't say. Like, there's times when God shows me something, but it's not meant for me to say anything. It's just for me to be aware of.
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B
Yeah. To be aware when you feel like you're supposed to say it and you don't.
- [08:36]
A
Oh, I'm not. Well, interesting. Yeah. So I feel like because I wasn't living my truth for so long, I had created this Tabitha that I thought would win. Like, I was suffocating true me so I couldn't breathe.
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B
Wow.
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A
And so the more and more layers I took off, the better I got.
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B
Why did you feel like you needed to put a mask on for the. Either the industry you're in or the relationships you were in or whatever it might be? I mean, I know from a personal experience, I wore a mask to feel like I needed to fit in and feel safe for many years.
- [09:09]
A
Yeah.
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B
Growing up playing sports and in school and, you know, as a young adult, I felt like I needed to protect myself with a mask. But why did you wear masks?
- [09:19]
A
Ooh. For many reasons. One, you know, I'm from North Carolina, Right. From the South. I grew up learning how to code switch and conform. Watching my mama, right? So we go to the bank, and if she talking to, you know, the white lady that work at the bank, but her voice is different, I'm like, oh, wait, is this how we talk?
- [09:37]
B
Interesting.
- [09:38]
A
Okay. If my mama came to school and talked to teachers, and, you know, all my teachers were white, in my town, it was only black and white. There was no in between. I ain't see, like, Hispanics or any of that stuff. Until I grew up and became an adult, she would change her voice. So I learned very early, oh, this is how we have to talk to people who are not black. I didn't know that that was Code switching back then, but it was like, oh, to be treated a certain way, to be respected, to be seen. That's what we have to do. And then growing up and working in corporate America, being told, like, in a call center, people hear my voice say, oh, are you black? I don't want to speak to somebody black.
- [10:14]
B
No way.
- [10:15]
A
Oh, absolutely.
- [10:16]
B
Come on.
- [10:16]
A
Oh, absolutely, honey. And so I would learn to mask it even more, to push it down even more. And then getting into entertainment, hearing. Oh, you sound country. You're going to have to learn to. To cover that. So it became like, I'm doing it for, you know, just my normal school and. And work. I'm doing it for corporate America now. I'm doing it for entertainment. And then it came to, like, oh, you can come to la. I used to, you know, have. My hair was always already natural, but they were like, for your skin, complexion, straighter hair. Okay. Certain size sound. Neutral used to be the. The. The word I would always be given.
- [10:56]
B
No accent.
- [10:57]
A
Yeah, no accent. Be as neutral. No one should know where you're from. And I believe that. And so I created that Tabitha to get jobs, right? The one thing that my mom and them, they named me Tabitha. So my first job at Winn Dixie, I never forget. I put in the application, dropped it off, and I got a call, and they were like, oh, we want to bring in for interview. I said, okay, great. So I get there, and the assistant manager, when I walked up, clearly thought I was white from my name and how I sounded on the phone, right? So when she looked at me, I was like, I'm here for an interview. She's like, did somebody call you for an interview? I was like, yes, ma'. Am. Said her name, and it was her. And she was like, I'll be right back. Ended up getting a job because the actual store manager had came. His name was David. He was an older man who was great. He was like, I'll interview him. And so he loved me. And I worked there, you know, for a while, but my name always used to get me jobs. Crazy enough, because people thought I was white. They want a black. Tabitha's around. It was like, it's a bewitched name. It's named from Bewitch. That's where my mama named me from. So it was. It was conforming to survive. My ancestors had to do it to survive, right? And it was passed down, but we don't have to do that anymore. I'm enough just as I am from Eden, North Carolina, honey. The very thing that I Used to cover about myself is the thing people love about me the most now. Wow. It's crazy, but I didn't know I believed what I was sold. Somebody sold me a lie and I bought it. But now, honey, I returned it and got all my money back with interest. Yeah.
- [12:40]
B
Do you feel like it was more challenging, you know, in North Carolina growing up, trying to succeed or get opportunities or more challenging in Los Angeles? Hollywood?
- [12:51]
A
Oh, definitely Los Angeles. Really? Oh, yeah. Yeah. In the South. It's like the thing about the south is, especially in North Carolina, I love my. My. You know, North Carolina is the best place in where. I mean, I love it, but it was always very clear. It wasn't hidden, you know, exactly. Who. Who you talking to? Interesting, right? Ain't no secret about it.
- [13:11]
B
Right. So whether I like you or not.
- [13:13]
A
Yeah, it's clear. Yeah. If I want you around or not, like, it's very clear out here. I hear you. It's Hollywood, honey. They hide the truth. You don't know that. They don't really fool with you until after the fact. Right. Or if you find it out in an email or you see it in the trays or whatever, you're like, oh, wait a minute. You acted like we was cool, but we really won't. You didn't really like me, you know, so it's more hidden here. People be out here acting. They be wearing masks out here. Yeah.
- [13:40]
B
But I say they want to do a project, but then they don't talk to you.
- [13:43]
A
Right. And you know what? I don't even care about that. Like, whatever's meant for me, I wholeheartedly, in this season of my life, I truly know what God has for me. It is for me. And if it ain't, it ain't.
- [13:55]
B
Absolutely.
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A
Yeah.
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B
I was just saying this to my. My fiance, Martha, recently, actually. I was like, you know, I was telling you she got excited. She did a great audition recently for something, and she was really excited about the possibility. I go, you're going to get this if it's meant for you and if it's in alignment with your truth and your future. And if you don't get it, it wasn't meant for you.
- [14:15]
A
It wasn't meant for you. Huh? That's right.
- [14:16]
B
You don't need to be upset about it or, you know, maybe you can have a little moment of like, oh, okay, this idea of, I wish I could have got it, but you don't want to go through years of stress on something that's not meant for you.
- [14:26]
A
That's right. That's right. Listen, when the thing is meant for you, there is nothing that will stop it. Like, God is not even complicated. He's not. He's very clear. We complicate things.
- [14:38]
B
We're in our head too much.
- [14:39]
A
Yeah, we're in our head too much. We're overthinking it. You know, we. You know, we'll get an opportunity, and before the opportunity is ours, we will play out every single thing. Oh, if I do this, and then I do this, and we ain't even got it yet, let's see if it works out for us first, and then we can expand on it.
- [14:54]
B
What do you think is the true key to attracting and manifesting exactly what is meant for us in life?
- [15:00]
A
I think walking in your truth would do that. Right. Showing up exactly who you are allows the things that belong to you to come. You know, because when we create a different person, as I did for myself. Right. When you are pretending to be someone else, God can't bless who you're not. Ooh. He can only bless who you are. Right. So. Right. So if I am pretending to be somebody else, what are these blessings that I'm getting? Those aren't mine. That's something I created. But when I just be me, I can get everything he has for me.
- [15:37]
B
And the interesting thing, you see people who are blessed for being someone they're not. They're usually depressed, anxious, stressed, or. It's never enough. It's never good enough because they still aren't good enough. They're not being who they're meant to be.
- [15:51]
A
They're always chasing something else.
- [15:53]
B
Exactly.
- [15:53]
A
Yeah.
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B
And that's almost a greater challenge. It's like you're being blessed, but you don't feel enough.
- [15:58]
A
Right.
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B
You have everything, but you feel worthless or empty. Empty.
- [16:03]
A
No peace.
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B
No peace.
- [16:04]
A
Yeah, honey, that's the freedom and being true to who you are. It's the best gift you can give to yourself.
- [16:10]
B
How can someone know what their truth is when they've been wearing a mask for so long?
- [16:16]
A
Oh, honey, we all. I feel like we know our truth. Right. Your truth is in your silence when no one else is around. Right. It's the things that you say to yourself. It's the things that you do. Like childhood memories before you were taught that you weren't enough and before you believed it. Right. That's your truth. Sometimes we have to go back to our childlike thoughts, because as children, we're free. We're born knowing what we're supposed to do.
- [16:47]
B
We.
- [16:48]
A
But we're taught how to have fear. We're taught. No, we're taught.
- [16:51]
B
Yes.
- [16:52]
A
Right. We're taught how to speak all the things. But we're also influenced by our parents, by our friends and peers and different things. Sometimes unintentionally, it just naturally happens in your influence. But what your truth is how you feel when you're alone. The things that you used to enjoy doing as a kid that nobody had to tell you to do, like, that's your truth. Right. Sometimes that's also your passion and purpose. We have to go back to that. Before we were taught, oh, no, you can't have that dream. Oh, no, you can't do that because, you know, they don't make money. You should do this. X, Y and Z. You go back to what? Did you used to love to play when you were kids? Right. Did you love to play office? Did you love to play sports? Did you love to play? You know, did you take care of dolls and treat them like you were a doctor? Like, what was your thing that you did every day without hesitation until somebody told you that that was just a gain? Sometimes that's your purpose. That's the thing that you were put here to do.
- [17:53]
B
Yeah.
- [17:54]
A
Before somebody told you you couldn't. And so you go back to that, and then it's like, oh, that was my truth that I let somebody tell me was a lie, but that belongs to me. You know, those are. Those are your feelings. Those are your. Your things that still matter for you, but we have to tap back into it. Got to get back to that.
- [18:12]
B
And when you were in that bathroom having that conversation with God, what was it again?
- [18:16]
A
You said, if you heal me, you can have me.
- [18:18]
B
If you heal me, you can have me. And that's powerful. And you said when you left that something shifted inside of you.
- [18:24]
A
Yeah, I felt lighter.
- [18:26]
B
Interesting.
- [18:27]
A
I felt lighter and I just felt different. You know, it's hard to explain that, but every day from that day, it was just like, something is happening. I have this thing sometimes where I can walk outside and the air will feel different on my skin. And I know a shift is happening. Like, I know it's coming. I'm like, oh, something's about to happen. It's a weird thing, but I can feel it. I remember I used to work this job, so working a 9 to 5 in LA, and we had a warehouse and then we had an office space. And so I would go because I was in charge of like shipping and coordinating. So I would go to warehouse sometime to take paperwork and then walk back to My office. And there was a very long hallway. And this particular day, I had felt the wind shift. And so when I had left the warehouse to come back down this long hallway, I. And I sometimes still do this. But I remember this day. I would close my eyes and. And I wouldn't even care about where I was going. I would just walk with my eyes closed, this long hallway, because it was just. I could just envision whatever the shift was. Like, God, got something else for me that's coming. And I remember a girl that was work, she was coming out of the bathroom, so she was, like, standing in the hallway. She was like, tabitha, Tabitha.
- [19:46]
B
She had your eyes closed, walking.
- [19:47]
A
And it startled me. And she was like, you were just walking with your eyes closed. I was like, oh, girl. Honey, Sometime, honey, I do that because I'm just seeing where he's taking me. You know, it's a. It's a weird thing. I can't even. I can't explain, like, why I do some of the things I do. It's also. I feel like it's part of the gift.
- [20:07]
B
Absolutely.
- [20:07]
A
You know, But. But after I left the bathroom that day, it was about two or three weeks later, I had this dream. And in the dream, I saw myself on a show, right? But the screen was small. And I've told this story a million times. And when I woke up, I was like, okay, Lord, reveal that to me. Because during this time, I'm not really auditioning. I'm not doing any acting. I wouldn't do a stand up. I wouldn't do anything that would land me on the show because I was not well. And I had a conversation with God, and he said, start doing videos. And I was like, I'm not doing no videos, honey. I'm an actress. A broke actress, but an actress nonetheless.
- [20:46]
B
I'm not doing that social media thing.
- [20:48]
A
Why would I do that? And also, Cause, you know, as an actor, then we were always told when I would go to action classes, a different thing. Stay away from social media. They won't take you serious in Hollywood. And I believed it. Okay? And so the voice was clear. Start doing videos. And I was like, lord, I don't want to do videos. And he was like, listen, when you were out doing standup, you were trying to get a TV show, and them little, you know, open mic nights, you were getting 15, 30 people to see you a night, you started doing videos, you reached thousands of minutes. And I was like, that's where I got you. Because I ain't got thousands of followers to Reach in minutes, the voice again. Start doing videos. So I was like, I don't want to do that. So then he reminded me. He said, remember in the bathroom, he said, if I heal you, I can have you.
- [21:28]
B
Ooh. And I said, do you want to be healed or not?
- [21:32]
A
I was like, oh, he caught me on a bad day that day. But I did say that.
- [21:37]
B
Did I really say that?
- [21:38]
A
Did I say that? You know, I was having a birthday that day, but that's the only reason I started doing videos.
- [21:43]
B
Wow.
- [21:43]
A
Right?
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B
Because you heard the voice that said, start doing videos.
- [21:46]
A
Yeah.
- [21:46]
B
And you didn't have a big audience then.
- [21:47]
A
No, I had, you know, my Facebook. I had my regular Facebook family. But, you know, three to 5,000 people, whatever your thing is on Facebook, I might have had, like, I don't know, 1300 followers or something on my Facebook actor page.
- [22:01]
B
Small, small.
- [22:02]
A
As small as you can get it in, you know, probably the same on Instagram. And I was like, I even got thousands of followers to. To watch me. Thousands of minutes. What are you talking about? And I was like, okay. But I also was trying to live a life of obedience. So I was like, okay, I gotta start doing these videos. And I was like, lord, what am I gonna do a video about?
- [22:22]
B
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- [22:53]
A
Ah.
- [22:54]
B
As I step into 2026, one of my big wellness goals is consistency showing up from my body, my mindset, my help every single day, even when life feels overwhelming. And that is why I love simple habits that support the bigger picture for my life. And starting off the new year strong with protein beverages at Starbucks is a big thing because Starbucks now offers a whole lineup of delicious protein beverages, including the brand new caramel protein latte, caramel protein matcha, and new protein drinks with no sugar added. This is huge. You can even add protein cold foam, or protein boosted milk to your favorite drink. So getting extra protein, it's naturally into your routine. My go to is the iced vanilla protein latte. It is so good at Starbucks.
- [23:46]
A
Ooh.
- [23:46]
B
That first sip feeling is amazing. Bold signature espresso with protein, boosted milk and sweet vanilla flavor. This is amazing. And what's so crazy is a grandeur has 29 grams of protein. I mean, talk about staying consistent with your wellness goals. Now my morning iced latte can make it feel effortless to hit my protein target. For me, this is just one of those small moments every day that starts it off right a little bit stronger and knowing I've gotten protein in my drink as well. So make sure to level up and add protein to your favorite drink at Starbucks. A new year and the colder days are here. This is when your winter wardrobe really has to step up. If you're craving a fresh start, it helps to have a few pieces you can count on. Stuff that looks good, feels good, and lasts seasons after season. And that's why I like Quince. They focus on premium materials, thoughtful design and quality you can actually feel. So getting dressed stays simple all winter. Their outerwear is especially impressive. Everything is made with high quality materials from trusted factories that meet strong standards for craftsmanship and ethical production. So it holds up and looks great. And it's not just clothes. Quince also has great stuff for your home. Martha and I have the European linen duvet cover set, and it's super soft and comfy. It makes our bedroom feel calm and cozy, especially on cold nights. Refresh your winter wardrobe with quince. Go to quince.com Lewis for free shipping on your order and 365 day returns. Now available in Canada too. That's Q U I N C-E.com Louis free shipping and 365 day returns. Quince.com Lewis so when I first started.
- [25:22]
A
Doing the videos, I was telling jokes and telling stories of, you know, being a mama and a wife. Same stuff I used to kind of tell on stage. And during that time, those same, you know, few weeks, my daughter had came home and told me about the documentary to watch that she watched in school. What the hell? Because she knew I was sick. We watched it as a family and I decided to do a 30 day vegan challenge. And after the 30 days, I was like, oh, this? I was feeling better. 10 days. The first 10 days, I'd had a headache for a year and seven months in the back of my head. Every day, wow. Every day I would fall, when I would walk, I lost my vision for a day. My body was just attacking itself. First 10 days, my headache disappeared. After every drug, I was getting shots in my head. I was getting everything they offered me. If anything was probably making me worse, nothing worked. 10 days of eating plants, headache disappeared. And so I told my husband. I was like, I think this is going to be my life. I think I'm going to go vegan. And the moment I said that out of my mouth on that day 30, I was like, I'm not going to go back. I think I'm going to be vegan. The same voice that told me to start doing videos, like a hummingbird would fly by your ear. That's how I can explain it. That's how it sounds. I was like, now tell people what you're eating in your videos.
- [26:38]
B
Wow.
- [26:38]
A
And I said, oh, Lord, I don't know if I want to do that, because that makes it kind of permanent. Like, I'm from North Carolina. I'm not doing a challenge right. I'm doing for real. This is my life. I'm going to be vegan. And I never wanted people to feel like I was trying to shame anybody or anything. And I was just like, I don't know. I had also shaved off all my hair at the time because my hair was always long and straight. So I was just doing a whole new, you know, transformation. And so I was like, okay. I just started telling people, y', all, I'm going vegan. And when I find food items, I'm going share it with y'.
- [27:13]
B
All.
- [27:13]
A
I'mma cook some recipes and share when I find, you know, good vegan food. And that's how I started. And nobody was watching. I was like, it's 33 people on here, Lord, while I'm cooking live. You said thousands of minutes. Where are they? I would. I would cry because I'd be like, I don't know why God has me doing this. I don't know what I'm doing. And, you know, that was August of 2017. And I think by October I started. I was feeling so much better. I started driving Uber because I didn't go back to work. I'd been on disability for over a year. And so I told my husband. I was like, mm. I was like, I don't wanna go back to a 9 to 5. I'm gonna just see what God got out here for me. I'm in la. I'm gonna drive Uber, probably pick up a producer or director. They gonna love me. I call you from set. That's how I think. I'm like, I'm about to get discovered in my car out here in LA. In December 30th of 2017, I dropped somebody foods driving Uber that morning, went in there and got me a breakfast sandwich because I was still, you know, vegan, new to being vegan, but Whole Foods always got a vegan option. So I was like, I'm gonna go ahead and get me breakfast. Had never heard of vegan bacon at that time. They had a sandwich and they, you know, the prepared food section, and it was called a tlta. And it was like tempeh, bacon and lettuce, tomato, avocado. I was like, oh, I ain't never heard of that. Throw me a little pickle on there, honey. Little onion and stuff. Ate the first half so fast. I was like, oh, wait, I need to do a video to tell people I found a new vegan option. Sat in my car. Cause I was on my Uber break. Did a video, posted it, went on back to driving Uber. By the time I got home, that video had like 50,000 views. I was like, wow, who watching this video? Next morning, over 100 something thousand. I was like. I told my husband, I said, I think I'm going viral. He was like, what that mean? I was like, I don't know.
- [28:51]
B
You gonna watch it though?
- [28:52]
A
Exactly. He was like, you gonna make any money? I was like, I have no idea. Four days later, Whole Foods reached out and they were like, we saw your video on Facebook. They DM me and they were like, we would love to work with you. And I became a brand ambassador for plant based living. Did over 15 campaigns and the rest is history. Yep. Honey, ain't drove Uber since, but I will if I have to, but I haven't. And my life has been on this journey ever since.
- [29:17]
B
That's amazing. So December 2017.
- [29:20]
A
December 30th of 2017.
- [29:22]
B
And you started making videos a couple months prior August.
- [29:24]
A
Mm.
- [29:25]
B
Wow.
- [29:25]
A
Yeah.
- [29:26]
B
Isn't it interesting? What if after like a month of. Of doing these videos, you just said, you know what? This isn't working. I'm not getting thousands of views right away. So I'm going to stop.
- [29:34]
A
Yeah.
- [29:35]
B
What do you think your life would be if you stopped a day before you post that video? Just said, I don't want to do this anymore. It's not working right away. You know, God said it would happen right away. It's not happening. I'm going to stop. Where do you think your life would be?
- [29:49]
A
I'll probably be working, you know, still auditioning, but I'd be working a 9 to 5. Yeah. I'd still be pursuing the dream of acting. And the thing about acting is, and I told you this before, that used to be my. My only focus. Right. I had put myself in this box where all I thought about was like, oh, I want to be a series regular, or, you know, of course, I would love to be, you know, the lead in a film. Those were my big break ideas. And God was like, you can do that. You can do that, Tabitha. You can do that. But let me show you what I can do.
- [30:23]
B
Wow.
- [30:25]
A
This is what he can do. This is my fourth book, but my third New York Times bestseller. I never, ever even had an idea to write a book.
- [30:32]
B
Wow.
- [30:33]
A
Right? I have seasonings. I have a hair care line. I have a major partnership with Target. I have my own food, my own clothes, my own furniture. Right. I have all these things that I never imagined. And that's because God says it's more than what you can imagine if you trust me. And so I do.
- [30:54]
B
Wow. This is inspiring.
- [30:58]
A
Yeah.
- [30:59]
B
If someone is feeling maybe not, like, in a complete depression or completely sick or completely out of it, but they just know there's something more for them, maybe their relationships aren't where they want them to be, or maybe their career is just off a little bit, or they just feel like. I just don't feel like the fire inside of me is driving me to where I need to be. You talk about 30 days to living free. What's the first few steps someone can take in starting to live free to get that alignment back inside of them?
- [31:30]
A
Yeah. It's so funny, because this is why I started this challenge, right? This is a challenge that I started in 2014 because I was trying to. Because what you're describing is feeling stuck, right? It's like, you know, there's something else, but you don't know what it is. We get in such a routine that we forget we haven't done anything outside of our routine for so long. So I always say, start with doing something new. It can be as simple as driving a different way to work or a different way to a friend's house, whatever. Or walking a different way just so that your eyes can see something it's never seen before. Something new that shifts the brain. Right. Like, even wearing something you normally don't wear. Like, for me, I always tell people, if you wear black all the time, throw some color on.
- [32:15]
B
I gotta throw some color on too, you know?
- [32:17]
A
Right. Like, for me, I don't like wearing black, but I found this, and I was like, it got a little color on it.
- [32:21]
B
It's cool.
- [32:22]
A
I'm doing a new thing. Right. And so it's little things. Even trying a new food, you know, going to dinner or lunch by yourself. You know how many people are afraid to eat alone?
- [32:33]
B
I know.
- [32:34]
A
Doing things that challenge you, that will open up a new space inside of you. That's what doing a new thing does for us. And that's how we start to think. Oh, okay. And then going back to, like, what is your dream? Like, what's the thing that won't let you rest? And I talked about this recently because people, sometimes they get confused by a dream versus a goal. Goals are things that we create. Dreams are deposited inside of us.
- [33:01]
B
Let's go.
- [33:02]
A
We don't make them up. They live there. That's why we can't rest, because they're constantly nagging us. A goal. You can be like, I ain't make that goal, or, I did it, Chet. But the dream won't let you rest. Even when you. Even when you manifest it and it comes, it still is persistent. There's more to do until we are getting, you know, called home. The dream is just. It lives inside of us.
- [33:24]
B
Yes.
- [33:25]
A
It's born inside of us. So I always say, do one small thing every day towards your dream. Even if you're stuck in the 9 to 5 job or in a relationship that you know, or business, whatever the case is, that makes you feel like, oh, I don't have time to do something towards me. Right. Which we all are worthy of doing something toward ourself every day.
- [33:48]
B
Yes.
- [33:49]
A
Do one small thing. Whether it's reading something that can help open up, you know, an idea in your mind to help you get closer to your dream, whether it's watching a movie or a TV show or listening to a podcast, that can help inspire or open up something in your mind. Something small every day. One little thing.
- [34:08]
B
There's a lot of people that I feel like that want to be. They want to achieve their dreams or be successful so quickly, you know, if they haven't made it by 27, it's like they're a failure.
- [34:19]
A
I don't know who put that time frame, Lord, but you.
- [34:22]
B
You, you know, you started to really gain traction in your late 30s, early 40s, right?
- [34:27]
A
Yes.
- [34:29]
B
What was the biggest lesson for you for, I guess, having success later in your 30s and early 40s versus in 20s, what did you learn about yourself?
- [34:38]
A
I learned that I was not ready when I thought I was. I wouldn't have nothing to show for it. Right. I needed to do, as my dad would say, keep on living. I needed to do more living before it came so that I could a know how to pray for it. Right. Because a lot of times I Used to pray, pray, pray for all these things to happen. Oh, God, I want my dreams to come true. And, you know, I'm fasting, I'm praying on it, but I was never praying. God, when I get it, prepare me to keep it.
- [35:09]
B
Let's go. This is the biggest challenge for a lot of people. I'm so glad you said this, because early on, I was probably 25, 26. I remember being broke, living on my sister's couch for a year and a half. No money.
- [35:21]
A
Yeah.
- [35:21]
B
And I had a mentor at the time that I was working for for free, learning from him, and I was like, man, I'm really struggling. I could really use some money right now. He said, money comes to you when you're ready for it. I was like, I feel pretty ready. I feel ready for this. But he's like, it'll come to you when you're ready for it. Otherwise, if you get it too early, you'll probably lose it.
- [35:41]
A
Yeah.
- [35:41]
B
And I think it's similar to, like, having a dream. Like, if you're not prepared for success or prepared for the pressures that might come with it.
- [35:48]
A
Yeah.
- [35:49]
B
You might. Cause you might sabotage it. You might lose it. You might squander it. You might not be ready for all of the responsibility, the weight that potentially could come with it. Right.
- [35:59]
A
That's right.
- [36:00]
B
So you don't feel like you would have been ready for it in your 20s or early 30s?
- [36:03]
A
Oh, absolutely not. I wasn't ready for everything I was going to gain. I also wasn't ready for everything I was going to lose.
- [36:09]
B
What did you lose?
- [36:10]
A
Friendships, relationships. Right. Things that people that I thought I would have in my life forever. And when I started walking in my freedom, they started to disappear.
- [36:23]
B
Wow.
- [36:24]
A
But God revealed to me. He said, everybody's not ready to walk in their freedom, so being close to you while you're in yours is disturbing their spirit. Oh. And I couldn't allow that to affect me in a way that I know it would have affected me in my 20s or early 30s.
- [36:36]
B
Oh, my gosh.
- [36:37]
A
But in this 45, I'm all right with it. I love them, But I understand 45.
- [36:43]
B
Feeling alive.
- [36:45]
A
Right?
- [36:45]
B
45 feeling alive.
- [36:47]
A
Yep. Yep.
- [36:47]
B
Wow. So, man, I can resonate with that because, you know, in my teens or my early 20s, there were certain relationships that I had formed that made me feel good and safe. Right.
- [36:58]
A
Yep.
- [36:59]
B
And I remember losing relationships almost every few years.
- [37:03]
A
Yeah.
- [37:03]
B
And I would be really sad that I was losing these relationships that people want to call me back or they didn't Want to hang out anymore. But I also know that I was in such a pursuit of my mission and pursuing things that later I found out that some of my friends told me, like, it scared them. Right. Because I was pursuing certain things and they weren't pursuing the things they wanted.
- [37:25]
A
Yeah.
- [37:26]
B
So I felt really hurt that they didn't want to hang out anymore. But it also kind of set me free to have more time for mentors or people that were wiser or older than me who I can learn from and build relationships with them. To give me counsel.
- [37:39]
A
Yes.
- [37:40]
B
And to kind of guide me forward.
- [37:43]
A
That's right.
- [37:43]
B
And that's one of the most challenging things I think, is leaving the friend tribe.
- [37:48]
A
Yeah.
- [37:49]
B
When you want to bring people with you, but they may not be ready.
- [37:53]
A
Everybody can't level.
- [37:54]
B
They can't all go.
- [37:55]
A
Everybody can't go. You know, I feel like a lot of times we. We feel bad because we. Especially when you love people. I love people.
- [38:04]
B
Me too.
- [38:05]
A
I'm a people lover.
- [38:06]
B
If you're a loyal person, all these things. Right.
- [38:08]
A
You always want to turn around and bring them back. And God revealed one day to me, he said, listen, everyone who you need to bring along, you don't have to turn around to get them. He said, because when you turn around, that's when you get distracted from and you got to keep your eye forward. The moment you do this, you might have just crashed. He said, the people who are supposed to come, all you got to do is go like this. You never got to turn around. They right there. They right there. It's just like a hand off a baton. You watch a marathon. They never turning around to reach for it. They just right here.
- [38:37]
B
Right.
- [38:38]
A
So the ones who are supposed to come with you, you don't have to turn around to go get them.
- [38:43]
B
So you've been married for 20 plus years, right?
- [38:45]
A
Yep.
- [38:46]
B
How has that worked with your relationship in marriage? You know, with you and your husband? Have you. Did you have struggle when you started to step into your authentic self because you became a different person? Maybe you became the person you always were. Right. Was there ever challenges in your marriage or relationship as you started to thrive, or was there alignment right away and just like, everything was perfect?
- [39:08]
A
Oh, honey, listen. My husband was so happy. He was like, finally the world get to see who I know.
- [39:14]
B
Wow.
- [39:15]
A
Yeah. I mean, for years, he hated the industry of Hollywood because he saw how it changed me. He would always say, why you can't just be you? He would. I mean, it would be all the time why you can't just be tabbed that, you know, the same tab that talked to your daddy. And I'm like, that ain't what they want. I gotta be this tab. Those were the arguments and all the no's I would get and all the hard work I would be studying and going to class. And he was like, you're doing all of this and they still don't like you. So he hated the industry for a long time. So when I became free and started walking in my freedom walk, he was like, now the world gets to see who I love. And I was like, you was kind of right about it. I guess all along he was probably like that. But no, it actually has made our relationship better and stronger.
- [40:04]
B
That's great.
- [40:05]
A
Yeah.
- [40:05]
B
I think Jim Carrey had a quote, I'm gonna paraphrase it, where he said, like, his father got fired from a career that he didn't love and that he wasn't his main thing he wanted to do. He always wanted to be a comedian, but he never pursued the dream. And he said something like his, you know, you can get fired at what you're. You don't love what you're not good at, so you might as well go after what you do love.
- [40:26]
A
Yes.
- [40:26]
B
You know, it's kind of like you. It's like people weren't choosing you for who you weren't. She might as well be who you want to be.
- [40:31]
A
Exactly. Yep.
- [40:32]
B
And get not chosen for who you are.
- [40:34]
A
Exactly.
- [40:34]
B
Right.
- [40:35]
A
100%.
- [40:36]
B
You know, something you brought up earlier about the walking in the hallway, closing your eyes, it reminded me of the Helen Keller quote, I'm paraphrasing, where she said something like, a lot of people have sight but no vision. And you were, like, able to close your eyes and visualize, you know, literally walking and not hitting the walls, but also visualizing the dream that you had for yourself in those moments, you were able to have vision. A lot of us are seeing, but we don't have vision.
- [41:07]
A
Right.
- [41:08]
B
What do you think is blocking us from having true vision?
- [41:11]
A
I think a lack of faith. Right. Because faith is, you know, believing things unseen. Right. So I think that, you know, but what is the word is walk by faith, not by sight. And so I have faith in the things I feel, the things that I believe. I have faith that they're going to work.
- [41:31]
B
Even if you haven't seen them yet.
- [41:32]
A
Even if I haven't seen them. Right. I've never seen God's face, but I believe. Right. I. I've heard a voice. I believe. I have Faith in the. In the visions that he has shown me in my dreams or while I'm awake. I have faith in those things. I believe in confirmation, Right. I remember people used to ask me and still ask me often, how did you keep going after all this time? It took you over 20 years to get to success. Like, on the moments where you felt like giving up, like, what were the things that kept you going? And I always tell people I would look at the signs of confirmation. Right? I remember I used to work in a staffing company in Greensboro, North Carolina. And I was on my lunch break, went through the drive through, and a little guy, when I got to the drive through to pay, he was like, hey. I was like, hey. He was like, aren't you the lady on the show? Aren't you on the, like, Nickelodeon, something like that? I was like, oh, no, I work at Selective Staffing off of High Point Road. He was like, okay. I was like, okay. He was like, no, don't you have the show with the kids? I was like, I don't know what you're talking about, honey. I must look like somebody. And I remember thinking, like, huh? Why did he say that? You know, back then, and God spoke to my spirit and said, because he can see your destiny. So little moments like that would confirm. And we're talking 2003, 2004. When that happened, I just want to Emmy for my children's show that I didn't even dream of having all 20 years later. I never thought I was going to have a children's show. It was confirmation, right? So if we pay attention to the little signs, I remember thinking like, I used to work at a nursing home, assisted living home, and we had to wear our uniforms. It was like khaki pants and polo shirts. And I worked the night shift. And it was hard. It was hard. This was like 2010. And I remember I would take breaks and, you know, go to the bathroom, put water on my face. Because overnight you're working at 11 at night to 7 in the morning, I'm trying to stay awake. And I would just stare at myself in the mirror. And some days I would just cry. And I'd be like, I look at myself. And for a flash, I would see myself on a red carpet and I would be like, I'm clearly in khakis and a blue polo. But for a quick second, I could see. I could see myself. I said, something is coming. And it would just give me this boost. I would just get excited. I would get so excited. And I know from Being there, so many things happen, very supernatural things. And I used to be like. Because I kept getting drawn to go work at a nursing home. My mother was a hospice worker. She was a social worker. But as a kid, she always taught me to respect our elders and just understand how much wisdom they hold, right? And so I would read to them when I was a kid. So after she passed away, I had this urge to go work in a nursing home. And specifically the night shift, which was crazy, right? So all these supernatural things would happen when I was there. And I feel like God had me there because one day I'll make a show about it, right? Also because seniors and elderly people are the best people in the world. They are the funniest. They don't care. There's no more fear. They don't care about what you think about them. They've seen it all, done it all, right? And so sometimes I think the flash that I saw of myself on these, like, red carpets and, like, lights and stuff, maybe it's because I'll do a show. I'll create a show about my experience there, and then I'll win, you know, maybe some awards or something for it. I don't know. But little things like that were always signs for me. So I always tell people, look for your signs. Sometimes you can be, I don't know, you know, talking to a friend that you have a certain relationship with. But you don't tell them your dreams. But they may say to you one day, just out of nowhere, you ever thought about doing such and such, and it's the thing that lives inside of you. That's your sign. You never told them that. How do they. How did they say that? That's your sign, right? That's confirmation. That's how you keep going. Look for your signs. You love what you do. You also love the idea of not doing it one day. But it's getting harder to know the best way to move into the future. Towards retirement. We hear about inflation, rate hikes, the changing market, Gotta get the kids through college, build an emergency fund, and then there's retirement. Here's where fidelity comes in. Fidelity can help you find clarity in saving for the future, even as your path and priorities evolve. How? Well, they'll help you create a free, personalized plan that adapts as your priorities change. 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- [46:54]
B
Show is sponsored by BetterHelp and as I head into 2026, I'm letting go of the pressure to do everything perfectly. A new year is a new opportunity to feel lighter and you don't have to become a new person to do it. Signing up for therapy with Better Help can shine a light on what's been weighing you down and illuminate possibilities for the year ahead. Better Help handles the initial therapist matching work for you. You just take a short questionnaire to share your needs and preferences. And thanks to Better Help's industry leading Match Fulfillment rate, they usually get your match right the first time. And if your match isn't the right fit, switching to a different therapist is easy. When you open yourself up to support, you give your mind room to breathe, reflect and step into a version of yourself you've been striving toward. Let BetterHelp provide you an unbiased perspective on your life so you can head into the new year taking only what truly serves you. You can't step into a lighter version of yourself without leaving behind what's been weighing you down. Therapy can help you clear space, sign up and get 10% off at betterhelp.com/greatness. That's better. H E lp.com/greatness. You have a quote that I saw said obedience is better than sacrifice.
- [47:57]
A
Yeah.
- [47:58]
B
What does that mean?
- [47:59]
A
Oh honey. Because obedience is the thing that it's hard to do, right? It's hard to be obedient sometimes, because sometimes we want to be in control. You know that feeling you get under you, that. That gut feeling as we call it? I call that the gift under the tummy. That's what I say gut stands for because we all got it. That's obedience. Obeying that, like when something is happening, you got to make a decision. You got to be obedient to Sometimes it's not the thing you want to sacrifice to do. Sometimes it's the thing that you have to be obedient and do so that you can go to the next place. Because I think that we all have a certain amount of grace God gives us all, but I feel like we can, we can get at a road that has a left and a right. Sacrifices to the left. Obedience is to the right. He also gives us the grace to make a decision. One Turn might get us there quicker. Blessings may feel better. The other turn may be a whole different uncomfortable ride, really. Right. So obedience is better than sacrifice.
- [49:12]
B
Where. Where was a time in your life where you sacrificed as opposed to were obedient and what happened for you so many times?
- [49:21]
A
I mean, about 20 years, I was living a lot of sacrifice.
- [49:24]
B
And what's. What's. How does it look different for someone when they do something based on making a sacrifice and maybe they think they're supposed to do this.
- [49:33]
A
Yeah.
- [49:33]
B
Versus being obedient.
- [49:35]
A
I think sometimes we could say some people, you know how you may want to start a business, right? And so you may sell your house, but something inside you feels like this might. This is not right. But you make the sacrifice and you do it anyway. Business fails, you ignore the obedience. You ignore the thing that said, don't do it that way, because you thought you were in control and that your way, your idea was better. Right. And sometimes it's hard to decipher, like, is this my thinking or is this the gift? Is this. Is this God speaking to me? Is this the thing that lives inside of me? Right? And so I always say, like, if you can come up with the idea and you can write it down and, you know, it's great, you can kind of come back to it, but you can also kind of forget about it a little bit. That's you thinking. But if he's giving it to you, it's not gonna let you rest. It's gonna keep on nagging. And also signs will come to confirm it. And like I said before, he ain't complicated. It's a little bit easier sometimes. Sometimes there's roadblocks because now there are roadblocks sometimes. But if we read the sign on the roadblock, it may not be a roadblock. It may just be, okay, there's a little bump here, but read the sign. You can still go this way. It's just gonna be a little bit harder. Reward will be greater later, but we just gotta make sure we know which way we're going.
- [51:02]
B
Wow.
- [51:04]
A
And so I've done that many times, but every time I went against that thing, I get burned every time. Really? Oh, every time something doesn't work out, it just doesn't. I remember and this happened recently. I had an opportunity to go in business with somebody to do a restaurant and absolutely love my business partner. His name is Neiman. Love him. He has a restaurant in Chicago that I fell in love with, Kelmona. And so he was like, I want to open one in la. I was like, I'll be your business partner. I ain't never did restaurant business. I did food, but I never did restaurant business. Like, I didn't know all this stuff. Right. But I was like, I know I can get people to come type of thing. And so I invested and did it. A lot of things happened with this building. A lot of things happened that we couldn't keep the business open.
- [51:54]
B
Really.
- [51:54]
A
Right. And so while we were in the process of. Before we ever opened, I kept coming in. I was like, I don't know, I got a feeling maybe this is not the right location. And he kept saying, oh, no, no, no, I know it is. And he had his reasons. He had his own reasons. And so I said, okay, we'll go with it. And my prayer was, God, if it's not meant to be, don't let it last.
- [52:19]
B
End it quick.
- [52:20]
A
And, baby, it ended quick. It was grand opening, grand closing. Wow. That's how it felt. Yeah. But I had so much peace with it because I knew I was like, I went against the gut.
- [52:32]
B
Yeah.
- [52:32]
A
But he's still doing amazing and successful with his restaurant in Chicago.
- [52:35]
B
That's right.
- [52:35]
A
Yeah.
- [52:36]
B
And it's almost, you know, the greatest blessing had. You went against your obedience. But it ended quickly. It didn't go on for five years of misery.
- [52:46]
A
Right.
- [52:46]
B
Like, at least it ended within a year or something.
- [52:48]
A
Oh, yeah.
- [52:49]
B
And it was okay. I only lost a little bit and it didn't work out. It didn't take all my time and energy.
- [52:54]
A
Yeah.
- [52:54]
B
As opposed to years where some people are disobedient and they stay in a relationship for 20 years too long.
- [53:00]
A
Oh, honey. Yeah.
- [53:01]
B
Or they stay in a business because they have pride. Well, I started this, and I want to make sure it doesn't fail.
- [53:06]
A
Yeah.
- [53:06]
B
And they go against obedience and they suffer more.
- [53:11]
A
Yeah. And then the hope is that when you come out of it, that you learned.
- [53:16]
B
Yes.
- [53:16]
A
Right. Because I definitely learned. To me, it was like God is saying, okay, now remember, I've already shown you this.
- [53:20]
B
Yeah. Don't do it again.
- [53:21]
A
Don't do it again.
- [53:22]
B
Or it might be more painful.
- [53:22]
A
You know what is going to happen. Exactly.
- [53:24]
B
So, yeah, might be more painful.
- [53:25]
A
Yeah.
- [53:26]
B
How did you know you were prepared and ready for the pressure and the weight of the success that came your way or the abundance started coming your way, you know, five, six years ago.
- [53:37]
A
I think, because I didn't necessarily know I was necessarily ready, but I felt normal, if it makes sense. You know, my husband used to say, he talks about this sometime, but you Know, we've been together for 26 years this year. So he's been with me since I've been pursuing acting and all this stuff in entertainment. And when we first moved to la, it didn't matter what I auditioned for. This is it. I would come home and be like, this is going to be it, honey. I know this is the road that's going to take me here. It could have been a short film, it could have been a commercial. Whatever it was was always a thing. And I would come home just overly excited, like, oh, I can't wait, we're going to win the film festival. I would just be all over the place, excited. And that went on for years. Right. This stuff started happening in the last. We'll say the last, you know, five years, but about three years ago, 2020, things really just went crazy, took off. So much was happening. I mean, campaigns, money, brand deals, products, everything. And I was very calm, very grateful. Always in a state of gratitude, but very calm. So my husband came to me. He said, hey, listen, I'm a little concerned. I said, why? What's going on? He was like, so for years, when you was doing the acting thing and you were not making money, we were struggling. You would be so excited, so, so, so excited about, oh, this is it, this is it. And it wasn't it. He said, now this is it. And you're not excited excited the same way. And I said, oh. I said, oh, I get it now. I said, because back then, my flesh was excited and I was all over the place. But my spirit was like, girl, no, no, no, you got to keep on going. This ain't it. Wow. This, this not it. I said, but now my spirit and flesh, we are in alignment. So this feels like home. It feels normal to me.
- [55:44]
B
Yeah, your nervous system is safer.
- [55:46]
A
It's safe. It feels like, oh, I feel balanced. I was out of balance before because I want in alignment. I said, so now I can be in a full state of gratitude. I cry a lot because I'm so happy, but I'm not all over the place. I was like, so now I know this is what God had prepared me for. So I feel at peace. And so it gives me when we're at peace and we have an understanding that I'm doing what God has planned for me and has purposed me to do. I know I'm ready for it. Wow. Yeah. I also don't have a problem saying no. That's how you really know when you're ready.
- [56:26]
B
Yeah. When someone's trying to Give you money.
- [56:27]
A
And you'd be like, no, I'm all right. God bless y'. All. I'm all right.
- [56:30]
B
That's big. That's a big move.
- [56:31]
A
Yeah.
- [56:32]
B
It's like.
- [56:33]
A
Yeah.
- [56:34]
B
Obedience at a high level.
- [56:35]
A
Yeah. Because I said no to a whole lot of things in the beginning of this journey, before money started coming in. And it was money, good money. And I was like, that's not in alignment where God has taken me.
- [56:49]
B
Yeah.
- [56:49]
A
I got to say, I got to pass on it. And that's how I knew that I really was living and believing what God has for me is for me. Because I'm like, we need that money. But I don't. I'm not gonna sacrifice. I'm gonna have to be obedient.
- [57:04]
B
Yeah. That's so good, because, you know, we've been doing this show for 11 years, and we've never taken. I've never been drunk in my life or high. I don't. Just don't do drugs or anything. And we've had different, you know, gambling companies or alcohol companies always wanted to sponsor, and I've just said no to all of it. And they've got big money.
- [57:21]
A
Yeah.
- [57:21]
B
Like, okay, that money can be nice, and I can hire more people and do these things, but if it's not in alignment with me, it just doesn't feel right. Not saying that other people shouldn't take that.
- [57:30]
A
Right. It could be for somebody. That's somebody else's blessing.
- [57:32]
B
Exactly.
- [57:33]
A
It's not for you. That's right.
- [57:34]
B
And I feel like. I feel good even though I haven't taken that type of money or those opportunities, and I feel like it's growing in the way that I want it to grow. You know, I don't need those things. I think that's really hard for people to say no.
- [57:49]
A
Yeah.
- [57:49]
B
When it's out of alignment.
- [57:50]
A
Yeah.
- [57:51]
B
And so that's. That's. That's challenging to do.
- [57:54]
A
Yeah, it is. You. You have to get to a place where you can do that. But I also understand desperation.
- [58:00]
B
Yeah. Yeah. You might have to take stuff sometimes. Yeah.
- [58:02]
A
I mean, back in the day, I. Some of the movies and stuff I've done from way back, I'd be like, oh, Lord. But I was like, I got paid $500 to do that or $5,000. And that 5,000 was the only money I made for six months. Right. So I'm grateful for all of it, though, because it's my story. Yes. You know, I did scripts that were terrible and, you know, I thought were funny, and now I'm like, oh, God, it was not funny, you know, just learning. But that's, that's my. That's my story to tell.
- [58:32]
B
Yes.
- [58:32]
A
You know, and that's also can help inspire somebody else that is in that season in their life.
- [58:37]
B
100%.
- [58:38]
A
We all go through different seasons. Yeah.
- [58:40]
B
What have you learned about the keys to having a healthy relationship and successful marriage? When you didn't have the success, the fame, the notoriety, you know, for the first, I guess, 15 years to now having more of that, what have you learned as one person in a relationship, you know, gets more famous and successful and financially well off? What. What have you learned or what advice would you give others in relationships?
- [59:08]
A
For us, it's always been we all we got, right? You know, the saying, don't believe the hype. I live by that. Don't believe the hype. My husband, we are our foundation. That's where it begins. It's God first and then us, right? Then the children and all the things. But together we can do everything together. You know, my husband was. We moved to LA and so that I could pursue my dreams for 15 years. He was a Los Angeles police officer. Wow. He was like, I can go get this job and we can at least have one solid income that has benefits, you know, because we had kids and you could pursue your dream and never have to get, you know, a career, like a job job. Although I always had a job, but I might have a job for a year or two and then quit or, you know, whatever. So he sacrificed, right? He did that. And I used to tell him, five years, I'm gonna blow up out here in LA and I'm gonna take you out of there. He'd be like, don't. I don't care about that. I just want. I'm fine. Pursue your dream. Pursue your dream, right? We did that together. And so didn't happen in five years. But after 15 years, I was like, listen, this don't even make sense for you to be working no more. Please retire, like from LAPD and do something that you wanna do, you know, something else. So being together and never letting the noise in, like, people start believing the hype. I am Tabitha Brown only because I carry my husband's last name, right? So I am a. A wife first. Like, that's. That's what it is. Like, me and my husband, that's. That's it. Everything else is added on. That's all. It's just work is work, but we never let it. I don't know how to explain it. I think that people, sometimes they forget that marriage should be first, you know? And for me, it's family first. It's going to always be that my career is my bonus, that I get to live right. That all the other things, it's the bonus my dream God gave me. I also feel like my husband was part of my dream. Right. That's part of who I am. Like, this is who he chose for me.
- [61:36]
B
Right.
- [61:37]
A
Right. To do this life with.
- [61:39]
B
What's his name?
- [61:40]
A
Chance.
- [61:41]
B
Chance. What's the thing you love about Chance the most, honey?
- [61:45]
A
He makes me feel safe. But Chance is not going to do nothing that Chance don't want to do. You be like, hey, you want to go to. Nope, not doing that. Like, it's just. Some days it gets on my nerves, but it's also admirable, like, oh, you're not easily influenced.
- [62:02]
B
He's authentic. Oh, he is.
- [62:04]
A
Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah, Absolutely.
- [62:06]
B
I guess on the marriage, you gotta have to deal certain things you don't want to do.
- [62:09]
A
Oh, yeah. Let me tell you now, as many days, though, he get on my nerves with that, I'd be like, you know what? I can't stand that about you. And then other days, like, I love that about you, you know? But I think another thing is he's a phenomenal father. I've been able to witness my husband in all stages of his life. Right. We grew up together. We've known each other pretty much our whole life since we were 10. And so I've seen him as a boy. I've seen him as a young man. And now, you know, a man, man. You know, he's 45, and it's been an honor to watch him evolve and grow.
- [62:48]
B
Wow.
- [62:48]
A
And mature. But fatherhood has been one of the best things to witness.
- [62:54]
B
That's beautiful.
- [62:55]
A
Yeah.
- [62:55]
B
Wow.
- [62:56]
A
Yeah.
- [62:56]
B
Chance the man. You know, you talk about fears a lot in the book. I did a new thing. What do you think was the biggest fear when you were not fully obedient or fully living the most authentic life, that that was meant for you. And what is the biggest fear now? Stepping into owning you 100%.
- [63:21]
A
I think the biggest fear before was, you know, dying with this thing inside of me, like, never letting it be seen. Right. Fear now doesn't necessarily live with me as much. I don't know if I have a necessary. Like, I don't. I don't know if I have a fear. I want to. I want to change people, Right. I want to. I want to affect them in the best way possible. Right. And Sometimes trying to spread love and positivity, people don't want to buy into that sometimes.
- [64:19]
B
Why is that?
- [64:21]
A
I think misery loves company, you know, and sometimes happiness scares people. You know, you can have people that everything's going great and they'll be like, I know something bad's gonna happen. Why we alive to go through it either way, you know, So I think sometimes I don't necessarily fear it, but I am concerned. Am I doing enough with spreading love and trying to reach people? Am I doing it the right way? Even though I feel at peace about it, I always, you know, I'm in prayer like God, is this really what you want me to do? I want to make sure I'm. I'm not ever being triggered to get back into being in control. Because, you know, healing is a journey. And so sometimes we can be triggered to going back to our old things. And my old thing is being I'm in control instead of, no, no, I'm letting God be in control. And I'm walking and I never want to go back. I never want to go back.
- [65:30]
B
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- [66:38]
A
The whole world, T mobile's got home Internet.
- [66:41]
B
Do it, Zach. T mobile's got home Internet. Let me try. T mobile's got home Internet.
- [66:47]
A
How much is it?
- [66:49]
B
Just 35 bucks a month and it's.
- [66:51]
A
Guaranteed for five years. Switching.
- [66:55]
B
T Mobile's got home Internet. Just 35 bucks a month with autopay and any voice line and it's guaranteed for five years Access of these applies T mobile.com isb for details and exclusions. How do you know when you're on the right path? In surrender versus in control?
- [67:13]
A
Hmm. I think it's that feeling. For me, it's the feeling off balance.
- [67:24]
B
When you feel like you're trying to control things.
- [67:25]
A
Yeah.
- [67:26]
B
You feel more off balance.
- [67:27]
A
Yeah. And when nothing seems to be lining up. Oh, Tab, you trying to do this? Step back. Step back. And let's look at every piece of the puzzle and make sure you're not trying to create the puzzle. Create the pieces and put it all together. Sit back and let God do what God does. We still have to do our part because faith without work is dead. Right. But still, you got to let him orchestrate. Yeah.
- [67:56]
B
Mara.
- [67:57]
A
Yeah.
- [68:00]
B
What do you feel like will be the thing that holds you back the most moving forward? Besides, you know, being in. Trying to be in control or not be obedient? Is there anything else? You. You don't have the fears anymore. What are you preparing for? Like, with the abundance coming your way, what are you preparing for? To make sure you don't get in your own way.
- [68:21]
A
I think just staying true to who I am. Right. I don't. I don't fear. I don't fear or project negative. Right. I. I'm not. I'm not preparing for negative. I'm expecting the unexpected. Right. Which I'm always in my mind thinking of God, saying, it's more than what I can imagine. Right. That's greatness. That's what I'm. What I'm looking forward to. I don't look forward to cloudy days, although I know they will come, but they're not. It's not something I'm like, oh, I'm planning for a bad day. No, I'm planning for all good days. I am being mindful and intentional with joy. Right. So I don't think. And listen, that may be the thing that holds me back. And if it does, then we'll cross that bridge when we get to it. But I don't plan on allowing anything to shift me outside of the position God has put me in. I think that I trust God. I believe that he has me on this journey, and I'm all right with whatever come my way.
- [69:43]
B
There you go.
- [69:44]
A
That's just kind of how I feel about it.
- [69:46]
B
What do you think is the greatest lesson God has taught you?
- [69:49]
A
I was always enough. I didn't need to try to do his job. Cause the thing about when you conform and when you Try to, you know, create another person. That's me saying, God, you didn't do a good enough job on me. I had to fix me. But he taught me he had did a great job and I was enough just as he created me to be.
- [70:15]
B
Wow. It's inspiring. Three books in the last four years.
- [70:20]
A
Yeah.
- [70:20]
B
Is that right? Three in the last four.
- [70:22]
A
And a little journal, like a workbook journal, but yeah.
- [70:24]
B
Just keeping track. This one's called I Did a New Thing by Tabitha Brown, your number one New York Time bestselling author. Multiple New York Times bestselling author. This is all about the 30 days to living free. You talk about how to really create new habits and a framework around setting yourself up for freedom, stepping into your truth, overcoming your fears. I'm excited. I'm excited for people to get a copy of I Did a New Thing. What else are you most excited about these days that you're working on and how we can support and serve you?
- [70:54]
A
Yes, I know. We were talking about it. I'm excited to get back into doing more acting. And I love that, you know, sometimes. And this is important for somebody to hear, somebody needs to be reminded of this. Sometimes we have a dream. Right. But our journey to get to it doesn't always look like how we envision it. And so God took me on this whole different path that has led me back to be able to do the thing that I've been dreaming of since I was a kid. And so more acting. I just finished a film. Television. You know, doing things that really matter to me. Making people laugh, sometimes making them cry. Right. That's what we do as actors. Making people feel. That's it. Creating more products that people can use in everyday life, because I think that's the most important. And I know my. I know my. My fan base. I know my. As I call them, my. My fam base. They. My family and, you know, feeding people good food, good recipes, but also feeding their soul with inspiration and staying true. Right. And I'm expanding with my hair care line. I don't know if you know my hair. Her name is Donna. I named my hair. She twisted up right now, but. And I normally have a big old afro and her name is Donna. So I have Donna's recipe because I don't do desserts, but Donna, she can give you desserts for your hair. So I have a sweet potato pie collection of hair products. It's at Ulta Beauty, also at Target now.
- [72:22]
B
Nice.
- [72:22]
A
And we're expanding the line and doing more things with that. So just Trying to, you know, build an empire, but off of truth. Just like you said, you'll never put your name on no, you know, alcohol. Cause that's not in alignment. I'll never just throw my name on a product. Right. It's gonna be something that, you know. Oh, wait, that's definitely Tab. Cause this is how she lived her life. So I'm just keep on doing things that matter and that are, you know, real to me.
- [72:50]
B
That's beautiful.
- [72:51]
A
Yeah.
- [72:52]
B
I am Tabitha Brown on all of our social media. Your TikTok, Instagram, Facebook, you know, YouTube has blown up as well. You've got amazing recipes, Alexandra. She's vegan.
- [73:03]
A
She told me. Yeah.
- [73:04]
B
And she was talking about how she wants to try one of your latest recipes. I think it was like a carrot and bacon.
- [73:09]
A
Oh, yeah.
- [73:09]
B
I was like, that sounds incredible. So I'm gonna have to have someone make it up.
- [73:13]
A
And that was like one of my first viral videos on TikTok that took me through the roof in 2020.
- [73:18]
B
So I gotta try that someday.
- [73:20]
A
Yeah.
- [73:21]
B
So people can get all your content on social media. I'm Tabitha Brown.com as well. But make sure to get the new book. I did a new thing. I've got a couple of final questions for you, Tabitha. First one, before I ask the final two questions, I want to acknowledge you, Tabitha, for the transformation you've made and for sharing your transformation so publicly and the success that you've received by owning your truths. I think a lot of people wear masks in the world. I wore masks for many years to protect myself, to fit in, to feel like I belonged. All these different things because I was afraid. And we can only create so much success with a mask on. But I think we can create true fulfillment and greatness as our authentic selves. So I acknowledge you for leaning into that, listening to the voice and being obedient to what you felt was right for you and the impact you've made by the continual actions you take and how you show up is just really inspiring. So I really acknowledge you for listening to the Voice and taking action, to be of service to so many people that watch and listen to you and read your books. So congrats on everything.
- [74:32]
A
Thank you for being.
- [74:33]
B
Of course, this question is called the Three Truths. So it's a hypothetical scenario. Imagine you get to live from this moment to. For as many years as you want to live, but it's eventually your last day on this earth.
- [74:46]
A
Okay.
- [74:47]
B
And in this hypothetical scenario, you get to create all of your dreams. They all come true. You live the life you envision. And you. You know, you have unexpected things that come to your life as well that are beautiful. But it's the last day. And for whatever reason on this last day, you have to take all of your work with you. So no one has access to this book anymore, this interview, and anything you create, for whatever reason, it's got to go with you.
- [75:11]
A
Okay?
- [75:12]
B
But you get to leave behind three lessons to the world and this is all we would have to remember you by. I call it the Three Truths. What would be those three truths for you?
- [75:22]
A
Oh, live free, Spread love, And eat well.
- [75:37]
B
I like it simple.
- [75:40]
A
Yeah.
- [75:40]
B
And powerful. Final question Tabitha. What is your definition of greatness?
- [75:48]
A
Definition of greatness is. It's freedom, right? Being completely free in your world and in everybody else's.
- [75:59]
B
I hope you enjoyed today's episode and it inspired you on your journey towards greatness. Make sure to check out the show notes in the DESC description for a full rundown of today's episode with all the important links. And if you want weekly exclusive bonus episodes with me personally as well as ad free listening, then make sure to subscribe to our greatness+channel exclusively on Apple Podcasts. Share this with a friend on social media and leave us a review on Apple Podcasts as well. Let me know what you enjoyed about this episode in that review. I really love hearing feedback from you and it helps us figure out how we can support and serve you moving forward. And I want to remind you if no one has told you lately that you are loved, you are worthy, and you matter. And now it's time to go out there and do something great.
- [76:55]
A
At Capella University. Learning online doesn't mean learning alone. You'll get support from people who care about your success, like your enrollment specialist who gets to know you and the goals you'd like to achieve. You'll also get a designated academic coach who's with you throughout your entire program. Plus, career coaches are available to help you navigate your professional goals. A different future is closer than you think with Capella University. Learn more at Capella Eduardo.