Most managers think they're coaching. What they're actually doing is announcing numbers — and it's why the same person is behind again this month.

You've had the conversation. Maybe three times. You told them to step up, to be more accountable, to take more ownership. They said they'd work on it. Nothing changed. So either they don't want it, or you're coaching a mood instead of a skill.

In this episode I break down what coaching an employee actually looks like when it works: how to find the one step in someone's work that's breaking, why "be more accountable" is unfixable feedback, and the six reasons people underperform — only one of which is a character problem.

You'll walk away with the four questions that do more work than any advice you have, a weekly coaching cadence that takes 20 minutes per person, and a three-question test to run on your team this week.

WHAT WE COVER

(1:15) Why coaching to the final number is coaching a corpse (3:30) Dana and Kevin — the manager who "handled it" three times (7:00) The six causes of underperformance, and which one is actually rare (9:15) Ask first, tell second: the four questions (10:30) One skill, thirty days — why fixing six things fixes none (11:15) Practice off the customer: role-play done small (12:00) The weekly, monthly, daily coaching rhythm (13:00) Somebody has to coach the coaches

THE MONDAY MORNING TEST

1. Name your weakest performer's actual gap — the specific step where their work breaks. Not "they need to step up." 2. What did you ask someone last week that you didn't already know the answer to? 3. Pick anyone on your team. Can they tell you the one thing they're working on this month? Their answer is your grade, not theirs.

Scripts, tools, and the deeper version of everything here: https://jasonrigby.substack.com — free to subscribe.

The Self Aware Leader is for managers who feel like they're performing the job instead of doing it. Burnout, imposter syndrome, the loneliness of leadership, and the conversations nobody trained you for.