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- [00:09]
A
Hi, everyone. Welcome back to the Social Hour podcast. I'm your host, Audra.
- [00:12]
B
And I'm your host, Bethany. And today we're talking about whips and UFOs and. No, not the aliens. Even though I know Audra would probably love to talk about aliens.
- [00:22]
A
Oh, I would love to talk about aliens. You can talk about. I just. Well, that'd be another topic. I just watched the movie Begonia with Emma Stone. If anyone's watched it, send me a dm. It's nominated for.
- [00:34]
B
Is that the one where he ends up with, like, a shaved head?
- [00:37]
A
Yes.
- [00:38]
B
Is it scary?
- [00:39]
A
No, it's not scary. They call it a thriller because there's, like, tension and all that stuff. But it's not scary. It's not scary.
- [00:46]
B
I was wanting to watch it, but sometimes thrillers cross the line of, like, too thrilling for me.
- [00:53]
A
Yeah, I mean, there is. There's. There's kidnapping and there's some stuff that happens. So, like, it can be tense, twisted. Not, like, scary, though. But yes, they're. They're definitely an alien component. Anyway, we are so off topic right out of the gate.
- [01:07]
B
That's okay. I started it.
- [01:09]
A
Whips and UFOs.
- [01:12]
B
What does that stand for?
- [01:13]
A
We. We all have them. Works in progress. Unfinished. I don't. I never get why we call it UFOs. Because it's like, unfinished objects. But that's kind of weird. But we all have that one either. Yeah, I know. Some are, like, so close to being done. You know, we get those projects that are like, I just have to hem it or I just have to bind it. It's like, right there. But then we also have the ones that maybe we cut and haven't seen, like, daylight since 2019. So there's that. Or have they never been cut at all?
- [01:41]
B
If you feel called out by this topic, you are not alone. If you're listening to this episode and not watching it, I'm over here, like, bashing away from the mic. Cause I'm like, ooh, this is. This is me. But I think it's all of us. And that's why we're talking about it. Because one thing that we've talked about recently is how to define what, like, in our last episode, we. What makes you want to sew? Why are you sewing? And sometimes we get a little shop happy and we maybe buy a kit or the fabric for a pattern. Cause we get excited about it. We see everybody else doing it, but then we don't end up starting it or doing it. And it's sitting there and we have this sense of guilt. So we're gonna walk through that today and talk about ways to maybe help you mentally reset and release some of these things that aren't serving you anymore. And some of these whips and UFOs are not serving us anymore. And that's okay. And we're gonna talk about that. But I would like to know in our Icebreake question and you can comment on our YouTube channel with your answer. You can leave your answer over in our Facebook group, the Social Seist, or even on one of our reels or post on Instagram. But we would love to know what is the oldest unfinished project you still own. Audra, you go first. My. My.
- [02:52]
A
My sewing bestie. My mother bought me the Fancy Forest quilt kit. Fancy Forest by Elizabeth Hartman. The kit with all the fabric for Christmas 2018.
- [03:04]
B
That's a good.
- [03:05]
A
I know. In 2019, I cut everything. In June of 2025 at my sewing retreat, I sewed the rabbits and the butterflies and I have not touched it since.
- [03:21]
B
That's okay.
- [03:23]
A
So this project is. Could very well be a 10 year project by the time we're done. And that.
- [03:28]
B
That's okay because I will say Elizabeth Hartman. Her patterns are very detailed and involved like the one that just came out the show and tell one. It's so cute. It is so cute. I saw it in person at Quilt Market. I. It stops you in your tracks. It is adorable. But let me tell you, every block of that is different. It's. There's no repetition in her pattern of like, you know, to make it quick. They're not quick, but they're stunning. They're amazing.
- [03:57]
A
And I love the pattern.
- [03:59]
B
Yeah. I will get it done. Give yourself some grace. But it is beautiful.
- [04:03]
A
It might be 2028 by the time it gets done.
- [04:06]
B
And if it's longer, that's okay, too. It's okay, too.
- [04:10]
A
All right, what's yours?
- [04:11]
B
I know you were excited about it when you started actually piecing it together. So holding on to that. As long as you're excited about it. Right? Yes. Okay. My question to this was, do quilt tops count? Because I have a ton of quilt tops that I've made, but I've never finished quilting because I didn't want to just straight line quilt them. And they were too big to like embroider quilts on my embroidery machine. But now that I have a longarm, they are in their own bin. And as soon as I start to get more comfortable with a longarm, I will be burning through those and finishing those and and they were just being saved for this purpose. So it's. It was just. I didn't have the right tools at the time to properly finish them how I wanted to finish them. And now that I do, I need to learn it. And then I'll be long arming all these quilt tops because I love them and they're all cute, but I just. They. I wanted them to have more than just. And there's nothing wrong with straight line quilting, but some of these were huge, so it would have been quilt.
- [05:08]
A
Yeah, I have a. I have a quilt top my mom and I worked on together. Shoot. I just actually forgot about it till I brought it up just now. Should probably quilt that. But it's this beautiful quilt top that her and I did together. And the center of it is the Magic Kingdom castle in Disney World. And then around it is all of the princesses paper piece. So I paper pieced the castle, my mom paper pieced the princesses, and I have everything for it. I've got the backing, the quilt top, But I wanted to do all this ornate quilting. Like, I wanted Ariel's tail to have fish scales, and I wanted Belle to have this. And I wanted all these things. So kind of like you, I wanted to bend the long arm and do all this unique stuff. And it's just been hanging on a hanger for like the last five years, so I should probably do that.
- [05:56]
B
Yeah. Yeah, I'd love to. Well, you have a long arm, so I would love to see it.
- [06:00]
A
I just have to do it.
- [06:01]
B
I know. But sometimes those intricate, bigger projects can feel overwhelming, so I get it. The other thing I was going to say is if. If my quilt tops didn't count, because I think a lot of people will have quilt tops that they either are waiting to send off to a long armor or waiting to long or quilt themselves. But, like, I feel like finishing a quilt top is part of finishing a project, because a lot of times I'm working off of a kit or whatever. For me, that's like the hard part. It's kind of done in a sense. But there is a project. There's two bag projects. And I'm starting to see a trend with me and bag making. So I started a bag. Started a bag last May with two of my friends at my sewing retreat. We were on our way to the sewing retreat. We stopped in Memphis at the sewing house, and we got fabric, and I convinced them to make it with me. Both of them have finished theirs months ago. Mine is still sitting here, and it's all ready to just drop in the lining, add the handles, and add the zipper. That's it. And it's like an oversized jelly roll rug tote bag. Like, it has got some structure and it's so freaking cute and it's fun colors and I love it. Why don't I finish it? I just need to finish it. And then I cut out. A year ago, I cut out all the. All the pieces for a Valentine's faux leather vinyl bag. And it's like heart shaped with, like, it, like cut out applique inlays and everything. So it's not like super easy, but it'll look very professional when it's done on my industrial machine. And all the pieces are just sitting there ready to start. They're just been sitting there for a year because you know what happened. Valentine's passed. And I was like, well, but now Valentine's is coming up and I'm like, I don't know if I have time to do it this year. I may wait till the end. You have time.
- [07:40]
A
You have time.
- [07:41]
B
If I want to make time anyways, so we all all of this to say, we all have projects that we start and don't finish, and we have to decide, are they still serving us or are they just taking up space and adding? Like, I just showed, like, oh, should I do it? Should I not? Do I have time? Like, add stress to my plate? Because every time I walk into my studio and I see it sitting there cut out, ready to go, I just want to throw the box away. But all the stuff's in the box. I just want to clean it, the clutter, but not because all the pieces are there. So, yeah, I just.
- [08:09]
A
All right, so share with us in the social sewers Facebook group, what is your oldest unfinished project? Make us feel not alone. And so let's start off with talking about why we get stuck in wit purgatory. And that's we're going to call it whip Purgatory. And I think first we need to normalize this and try to release some of that guilt. First of all, if you've got an unfinished project, it is absolutely not a failure. It's not a poor reflection on you. I personally, and I think Bethany agrees, this happens as creatives, we're curious. We want to try new things. There's a little bit of squirrel, bright, shiny object that happens. Whether it's new fabric or new project or a new way of doing things. We just get excited about the next new exciting thing to scratch that creative itch and yes, it can start to get overwhelming when those build up. But first and foremost, do not ever feel like it is failure or a poor reflection on you.
- [09:14]
B
No. And there are a couple things that like I was kind of reading through our notes for this of like real reasons projects may not get finished. I'm just going to read these off because I can relate to every single one of these and I would almost guarantee that most of you can relate to at least a couple of these. So skill gaps you did not anticipate. Maybe there's a bit of a learning curve. It slows down your momentum and you get overwhelmed. Hello. Instructions that stop making sense halfway through. It kind of relates to the first one. But like maybe the pattern wasn't written well or you're not understanding things, or there's not a video to help you follow along, which is always really helpful. Running out of steam once the exciting part is over. That's exactly what happened with that bag. I turned it into the shape of a bag and I'm. And I made the lining and I'm like, eh, handles are boring, zippers are boring. Like life interrupting your momentum. And that's very real. That happens to all of us with all of our stuff.
- [10:08]
A
Yeah, absolutely happens. Right?
- [10:10]
B
Losing interest because your taste or needs change. Why do you think that Valentine's bag is still sitting there? Cut out and not sewn. It's not something I'd probably carry around.
- [10:20]
A
Yeah, yeah, you're not going to carry it around in June.
- [10:23]
B
Whatever. It's just, it's not really my, my jam. But it's really cute. And I was like, maybe I'll make it. Maybe I should probably just be like gift it to someone and say, who wants to do make? And be like, hey, it's already cut out for you. I might make it and be a photo of it. I might make it. Charlie would love it.
- [10:41]
A
And I want to go back to that like running out of steam once the exciting part is over. Because this is something I encounter just in life as well. But in creativity, but also in life is. I don't think we acknowledge that finishing and starting are two different skills. Starting highs and two different highs. So finishing or sorry, starting is. Oh my God, I'm so excited. Look at this cute fabric. Look at this cute thing. Look at this new thing. I can try. Look, look, look, look, look. We start to get going and then we start to kind of lose that momentum and then endurance has to kick in to sometimes finish and sometimes we have a hard time shifting from excitement to endurance. And because that endurance takes patience, it might take problem solving, because maybe you hit a snag. And sometimes you just have to persevere. So we need to acknowledge that sometimes when we're shopping, whether we get excited with our friends at a store or at a quilt show or wherever, and we're all excited. Excitement and endurance are two different things, and we need both of those to finish projects. And if. If that's. If that latter one goes away, that's when it gets hard to trudge through.
- [11:55]
B
I couldn't agree more. And it's not just with physical projects. Like, I designed the cutest Valentine's quilt, and I, like, purged that out of my brain in minutes in Illustrator. Designed the whole thing. Got all the way to the point where I had to start doing all the step outs and writing the instructions. And if I don't, I'm like, well, it's past Valentine's and we're gonna end up with the same situation as the bag.
- [12:16]
A
Because then it becomes work. It goes from like, oh, my God, I'm so excited. I'm so excited. And then we get into the work phase.
- [12:22]
B
Yeah.
- [12:22]
A
And the work phase isn't as fun.
- [12:25]
B
No, it's not. But. But when it's all done and I get to share it with you guys, it's so rewarding, right? Or when I finish a quilt. Like, I started the ghost quilt, the little girly ghost quilt I started that was so excited to do it. I got all the materials on a spur of a moment Saturday, and I started cutting it out, and I got it all cut out, and I was like, holy crap, this is a lot of pieces. And then I made the first one, and I messed it up, so I had to do it again. And I was like, okay, now I get the rhyth, but this is going to take me way longer than I thought. And then I got it all done, all the blocks, and then I just lost steam. I mean, it was on in November at our girls trip before I finally quilted it and did the scalloped border on it. But I mean.
- [13:07]
A
Which looks amazing.
- [13:08]
B
It does. I love it. But I'm like, we're almost to Christmas and I'm over here showing my ghost quilt. Whatever.
- [13:14]
A
I don't care.
- [13:15]
B
I love it.
- [13:16]
A
You're ahead. You're ready for 2026. You're ahead.
- [13:19]
B
Everybody else is late.
- [13:20]
A
Exactly.
- [13:21]
B
Exactly. All right, so how do we decide if we're going to finish a whip or a uf or if we're going to, like, write it off? Or turn it into something else, or find new inspiration from it. Like, how do we make that leap from, yes, I have projects that have been sitting. To deciding what to do with it next. Because finishing it isn't the only choice you have.
- [13:40]
A
We need to sit down and ask ourselves a few questions. And this is where the key to this is being honest with yourself. Because it's very easy for us to ask ourselves some internal questions and tell ourselves what we want to hear. Let's talk about asking questions and giving ourselves honest answers. Do you still want it? Do you still want this finished item, like your Valentine's bag?
- [14:02]
B
If you finish, you actually still want it? You ask me the question, and I'll answer honestly about the balance.
- [14:08]
A
Let's talk about your val. Let's talk about your Valentine's bag. Do you still want it?
- [14:11]
B
No.
- [14:12]
A
Okay, there you go. Done. So then that's. That's your questionnaire. Over, over. Because if you can. If you answer honestly and say, like, do I still want this? And the answer is no, then you're done. You're right there.
- [14:26]
B
Donate it, sell it to make it for the skill building and to use that machine. But the finished result doesn't excite me because it's probably something I wouldn't carry because it's, like, black and pink, and I'm more of, like, a neutral. I wear. Literally carry the same cream or tan bag, like, year round. So, like, it's not something I would probably, like, carry, but I would be proud to make it because it would be a skill building project.
- [14:52]
A
So then my second question for you is, is there another way for you to build those skills?
- [14:58]
B
Well, I already have those materials. True. And it's already cut out, so. But you know what I mean, this is where we all get.
- [15:05]
A
So this goes into the next question. Will finishing this teach me something useful?
- [15:09]
B
Yes. Yes. And I spent, like, a hundred something dollars on the kit. There's the guilt of the cost, right?
- [15:15]
A
Yeah.
- [15:15]
B
Yeah. Like, I spent the money. I should use it. But I could take that pattern, cut it out again in fabrics I actually like and make it. You know what I mean? Like, there's workarounds for me to find joy in the project, to say I did it and learned it without using the materials I've already cut out that I'm not vibing.
- [15:36]
A
Going back to some of the things you talked about with accountability and having an accountability partner, then maybe you ping me and say, like, hey, I really want to make this bag, but I don't love the fabrics. Do you Want to make this bag and these fabrics, and we can do it together and have an accountability situation.
- [15:49]
B
Oh, I love that idea.
- [15:51]
A
Hey.
- [15:51]
B
Hey.
- [15:52]
A
So there's that. Okay, here's another question for you. If you've encountered a problem on your wip, is the problem fixable with reasonable effort? Like, are we blowing the problem up to be something bigger than it actually is? Like, is it actually something that give it 10 minutes, half an hour or an hour, you could figure it out? Or are we saying, forget it, I'm not interested? You know, and reasonable is different for everybody, so just keep that into mind. And then am I avoiding it because it's hard or because I just genuinely don't care anymore?
- [16:22]
B
It's not. It's hard to get started with something that you don't do on a regular basis. So, like the bag making with my industrial machine, I don't do that very often. And so every time I machine a little bit. Well, I mean, I do. I know it well enough. And once I get started, I really enjoy making it on that machine. And I've made several bags on the machine, so it's not so much the machine, it's just the getting started. Because the lingo in bag making patterns is very different than any other patterns, whether it's garments or quilting or.
- [16:53]
A
But you have a phone, a friend.
- [16:55]
B
I do. I do. But I, as someone who has been sewing for as long as I have, have a hard time asking for help.
- [17:02]
A
Okay, well, that's another podcast episode that
- [17:04]
B
we need to talk about. No, that's a therapy session.
- [17:08]
A
I know. Because we've been doing something a long time doesn't mean we don't ask for help.
- [17:12]
B
And for the educators out there, I mean, I teach all different types of sewing, but that doesn't mean that I'm not still learning. Like, I'm learning this Longarm. And my friend Kelly over at Janome, she's like, you know, you can text me anytime. I was like, but I don't want to bother you. She's like, you need it. And I'm like, okay, fine. But it was also the holidays, so I was trying to be respectful, but, you know, it's just like, I really do have a stubbornness about me that's like, I want to figure it out. I should be able to figure out. I have been sewing for 35 plus years. I have been professionally trained in all these different things. I should be able to figure this out. But sometimes you just need someone who knows things that you don't know to help you and I, even as an educator, really struggle sometimes to ask other people for help because I feel like I should know it. Even though that's ridiculous or I feel less than qualified to be a sewing educator, even though this isn't my area of expertise, it feels, I hate to say it, a little. I beat myself up about it and degrading on myself, even though that's so not true. I know it's not true, but that's how it feels to ask for help. And whether you're an edu and maybe other educators out there feel that way because you're always putting out content and sharing what you know and you know a lot and you give yourself credit for that. But then you encounter or try new things. It's like, it's hard to go from the teacher to the student. It is hard.
- [18:28]
A
But you know what's funny is you and I, this is one of the areas where you and I are very different.
- [18:32]
B
Yeah.
- [18:33]
A
I also have been sewing for three plus decades and I have zero issue asking for help because that's what I love about sewing is I'm always learning and I always know there's someone who knows more than I do and can make me better.
- [18:47]
B
And, oh, I love it when I get the help. It's just the initial forcing.
- [18:51]
A
See, I have zero. I have no issue asking for help. Hey, do you have any advice? Hey, what do you think? Hey, help me. Like, I have like no issue asking for help because I feel like it's just, I help people, they help me. I. I know I will never be an expert. I will be very, very knowledgeable. Yeah. So, yeah, I don't know.
- [19:12]
B
I don't know. I'm always telling people, message me, message me, I'll help you, I'll help you. And I do. And I love it.
- [19:17]
A
But you have a hard time doing it yourself.
- [19:20]
B
Okay, well, that's a therapy session we'll have offline anyways. Okay.
- [19:25]
A
So the other thing we're going to talk about too is. So you talked about how you've already bought the kit. It was like a hundred plus dollar kit.
- [19:32]
B
Yeah.
- [19:32]
A
Sunk cost is not a reason to keep going. That, that fabric being cut on your table. You owe it nothing. So if it doesn't bring you joy, pay it forward. Because you know what? There is someone out there in some creative space that would absolutely love to take that as a learning experience. So. And I know that's hard because our, our stuff can be expensive. But sunk cost is not a reason to emotionally force yourself to do something Creativity should be nothing we force.
- [20:03]
B
Yeah. I don't feel that way about my fabrics that I've not cut into. But for me, as soon as I cut into it, I. It's like the value of it is gone, and I have to finish it. You know what I mean? It's.
- [20:15]
A
Yeah, but is there someone out there that would absolutely love it and love to finish it and learn from it?
- [20:19]
B
All right, well, I'm taking
- [20:23]
A
Bethany's hating
- [20:24]
B
me this episode Taking requests. I'm feeling really called out today.
- [20:29]
A
Hey, I am just as guilty. I know I could pull so many things out of my closet. I am just as guilty. But you're the one who volunteered to be the subject, so I know.
- [20:40]
B
Well, it's very rare that I cut a project and don't start sewing it. This is the one and only time, and it is eating me alive.
- [20:47]
A
Okay, well, I'll do it with you. Like, send it to me after this. Maybe I'll do it with you, and then you got an accountability partner.
- [20:52]
B
If we were walking around quilt calm with matching heart bags, you'll know we finished it. It's actually really cute. It's a really cute project anyways.
- [21:01]
A
Okay, send me a photo.
- [21:02]
B
Where are we at? Let's repurposing. Well, we kind of talked about some of that, and we've had conversations in the past about repurposing things that aren't working. So this is where you could. Like, the hardware in this kit is adorable. Right? Or reimagining the bag or eliminating the heart aspect that I don't love or whatever. You know, like, re. Changing the shape or something. Like you said, passing it on to someone else who wants to finish it. Like, Audra. This line hurts. It's not letting go. It's. It's. It's letting go. Not quitting. I'm. I'm not quitting. I don't like to quit things that I've started. But. And I've started it because I cut it out. And I've invested time and money now, so that's hard. But that was, like, over a year ago.
- [21:42]
A
And it's an inanimate object that you owe nothing to.
- [21:45]
B
I know. It's not that I owe it to the object. I feel like I owe it to myself and my bank account.
- [21:52]
A
Understood. And I get that because you know me, I love to pinch pennies wherever I can.
- [21:58]
B
And it was buy to support a friend. And it's so cute.
- [22:05]
A
And this goes.
- [22:05]
B
But.
- [22:06]
A
But this goes back to the. How can you repurpose it? Can you use the hardware for something else? Or like you said, can you make it with fabrics you actually like?
- [22:13]
B
Can I make another bag from the materials I've like? I can make a smaller bag with those materials. It's not that the materials aren't good and they're cute. Maybe I can make some wallets out of it. I don't know. But it's just taking the time to figure that out sometimes can be overwhelming. And if you keep getting stuck like I am, maybe it is time to just hand it off and release it because. Yeah.
- [22:33]
A
Yeah. So we're going to talk about the emotional weight of UFOs and whips here shortly, but let's talk about how we can actually finish more.
- [22:41]
B
So we talked about either letting them go or the other side of that is finishing the project.
- [22:49]
A
So I am absolutely guilty of saving all my favorite things. And the problem with saving the beautiful fabric that you're in love with and not cutting into it or saving the beautiful hardware or saving the beautiful XYZ is that we're not allowing ourselves that creative joy. Because if we're like, well, I want to make this, but I don't want to use my favorite fabric, you instantly are starting a project less vested because you're picking the substandard fabric or substandard hardware, whatever that is, because you don't want to use your favorite stuff. So this is me. This is me telling you, use your favorite stuff.
- [23:31]
B
Cut into the.
- [23:31]
A
Because if you're using.
- [23:33]
B
Yeah.
- [23:33]
A
If you're using your favorite fabric, if you're using your favorite hardware, if you're using your favorite zippers, yes, there is a reality you will not be able to find it again. But that being said, you also have a beautiful finished project with that thing that you can show off. Look at this beautiful quilt I made with my favorite rifle paper fabric. Or look at this bag I made with the cutest zipper pull I found and is even made anymore.
- [23:55]
B
Like, you can show it off and
- [23:56]
A
be proud of it.
- [23:57]
B
This cute dress with Liberty of London fabric that I spent an arm and a leg on cut into it. That stuff is so pretty. It's meant to be made into something. You're insulting the beautiful things you've seen, spent money on by not turning them into beautiful things and letting them just sit on the shelf or in a bin or in a closet. It feels cruel, but it is hard.
- [24:18]
A
And it's hard, especially in our industry, because, yeah, things aren't always. Things aren't always reprinted.
- [24:24]
B
No.
- [24:25]
A
Well, I know we can't Find it again.
- [24:28]
B
I do this a lot with patterns, especially garments that I haven't made before. And I want to test the fit. I'll get like, a bed sheet or something. Like, it's the same weight of the fabric that I want to use. Same similar type of fabric to test the fit of, like, the bodice. I'll just make the bodice or whatever. And then I'm like, okay. These are some tweaks I need to make before I cut in the good stuff, so I feel more comfortable cutting into the good stuff. But I bought it for a reason. And as long as you're still loving it and excited about the good stuff, don't wait. Just do it.
- [25:02]
A
Gonna be something else comes that comes out that you love even more or just as much.
- [25:07]
B
My stash is proof of that, so I couldn't agree more. Don't sit on it for the. And if you're like, this is a beautiful fabric, but I need the right pattern to come along, I get that. But once you maybe seek it out, like, make an effort, seek it out the pattern, and just make it like, you won't regret it. And even if you're like, okay, I don't love how this dress fits after all. Okay, well, you learned something from it. Maybe you can alter that now into a cute top instead of a dress or a cute skirt. You know, like, there's always ways to change it into something else. But I don't know. I just. If you want to be able to finish a project, you got to be loving the materials you're using, because there's
- [25:43]
A
been many projects I've started. And then I'm like, I don't love this fabric. And again, I tell you, I am guilty as well. So please know I'm not sitting up here, my pedestal, talking about how I cut in all the beautiful things, because there's also a ton of beautiful fabrics that I have not cut into. This is also a talk for ourselves, because we are just like you.
- [26:00]
B
Oh, yeah. Oh, this is. This is. We are speaking from experience over here. I will say one thing that I always tell people is having, like, I'm all about learning and growing your skills, but there's also a need for comfortability and practicing what we've already learned. And repetition helps build better seams, better accuracy, better points, whatever it is you're working on. And sometimes we just need that easy, quick win in between the challenging projects. And having that, what I call palette cleanser really does help reset the motivation to take on that. So, like, if I need to make something, and it's gonna challenge me. I may need to do a quick little zipper pouch or something small. I made those Hemingway pouches recently. Those I can make in an hour, and I can pick out two fat quarters, and I'm good to go. And I have fun with it and throw in a little zipper, and it's so cute. I love those projects because it just kind of gets my juices flowing, gets me in the rhythm, and then once it's done, I feel accomplished and I'm ready to cut out that next project or tackle that more challenging one or. And I'm in the zone. So sometimes we need those quick little wins to reignite our Sojo. We don't have to start with the hard thing first. Yeah. So having those little comfort projects in between is.
- [27:26]
A
Okay, let's talk about the emotional weight that those UFOs can bring, because I don't think we realize it or want to admit that to ourselves.
- [27:35]
B
No, don't. I mean, I feel like I've talked about it on this episode already. Like, just I could see that box sitting in my studio down the hall. And every time I walk past that room, it's like, it's the only thing I see in that room, and I'm just like.
- [27:49]
A
What it does is it creates this, like, judgment in your head, whether you realize it or not, of these little inner voices saying, see, you don't finish stuff. It's this little voice that starts chirping away in our head, whether we like it or not, of saying, we don't finish stuff, or negative self talk when we have those things staring at us. It just creates judgment that we create up for ourselves.
- [28:15]
B
Yeah, it does. It does add a weight. And like, this bin of quilt tops. It used to sit on one of my countertops in here before I renovated my sewing room. So now it's all in a bin. But it's all right there under my long arm. And I know the moment I really start getting comfortable with my longarm, I'm going to be rocking and rolling through those things, like, so I'm excited about that bin. It doesn't create stress for me. I'm excited, and it motivates me to learn my longarm faster because I love all the tops that are in that, and I have backings for most of them, so I'm really excited about it. The other side of that is there's projects that are just sitting. I will say there have been projects that I've started, even garment projects that I've Started over the years, and I made the whole thing. And then the skirt, it's always skirts for me. I don't have the body for a skirt, but it's like, it's like it's too. I need it certain width for my rear, but then, like, I need it to be a certain width for my waist, but I don't. I don't have a curvy shape. I'm like, built like a boy. I'm just straight. And so, like, it just would gap around the waist or it would fit in the waist and be really big in the hips. And I could just never, like. And I. I just could never get skirts to fit right. And I made this beautiful corduroy skirt with the belt loops and it had buttons all the way down the front. And I did all the buttonholes and the buttons and the whole thing, and I put it on and then I held on to it thinking, I'm gonna alter this to fit me. And I never did. And I have done that with three skirts. I have made the whole thing. It's the cutest skirt in the world. I had one that had like a whole separate satin lining, and it was the cutest thing, cutest plaid. And then I just. It just doesn't fit me and it looks awful. And the effort that would have to go into fixing that, and I just go, I'm gonna hold onto it. Maybe one day I'll come back to it. But I get so defeated at the end of making such a beautiful garment that I can't wear, I end up chucking it.
- [30:11]
A
It's funny you say that.
- [30:12]
B
I get so mad. I just. This is. Note to self, future Bethany, don't make skirts. Just don't.
- [30:18]
A
Well, it's funny you say that because just outside my sewing room, there was a gala event like, two years ago, and I decided to make this beautiful, like, bias cut gown for this event. I made it. I was so proud of myself. I tried it on and it just doesn't fit right around the waist. So different from you. I definitely have a waist, and then I've got the hips. So I fit it to my hips and it is way too big in the waist. The issue is I need to take it in the back, but I need someone to pin me while I'm wearing it. And I have no one in my house that can pin me. And every time my mom is up, I forget to ask her because we're too busy doing other stuff. And this dress is hanging on a dress form just outside my sewing studio. So every single day I walk past it, like 20 times, and it's staring me in the face. This beautiful gown, this beautiful navy fabric.
- [31:10]
B
It's like, I could have pinned you the last time I saw you.
- [31:12]
A
I know. And I didn't even. Because we were. I didn't even think of it.
- [31:15]
B
I didn't even know, like, then the
- [31:17]
A
question is, why am I holding on to it? The reality, it's been hanging on that dress form because it is beautiful.
- [31:22]
B
It is beautiful because it's beautiful.
- [31:23]
A
And I invested all this time into it. And I do think if it fits, it's going to be stunning. What I don't realize is it's almost creating this mental guilt, whether I realize it or not, that I walk past it every time. I'm like, didn't get that done.
- [31:35]
B
Didn't.
- [31:35]
A
Didn't get punishment.
- [31:37]
B
Like, you're trying to, like, self sabotage. You know what? Maybe put it in a closet, Just let it hang in a closet. Just let it.
- [31:44]
A
But then I feel like I'm gonna forget about it completely. I don't know.
- [31:47]
B
But anyway, the point is, we all know about it now.
- [31:49]
A
We all know about it. Yeah. The point of this is I do get a lot of things done. We all get a lot of things done. But these unresolved things, like, hang out there and make us feel. Yeah. Like we don't get stuff done. So we need to clear some of those things out because it's just creating baggage where we need mental space. And we all know we need that clear mental space to be creative and make all the beautiful things.
- [32:15]
B
It's like the same thing as, like, everybody says they, you know, the negative is so much louder than the positive. And it's kind of the same with these whips. Like, these unfinished projects that we're carrying. Guilt about weigh so heavy on us that we can't even step back and. And go, look at all the things I've done this year. And I love the end of the year videos where people are like, sharing all their makes that they've made from the year. And I did one and I was kind of going through it and I was like, it wasn't even just my makes. It was just my travel, the things I experienced. And I went all the way back and I was just like, holy cow, I did a lot this year. And sometimes we get so hung up in the moment or the negative guilt of unfinished projects or things that we didn't get to do yet that we wanted to do, and all these things we don't Take a moment to go, wow, look at all that I did do. Like, I didn't get to make as much this past year, but I traveled a lot this past year, and I got to do some really cool things. All because of sewing, by the way. So it's not. I have to give myself some grace. And if you need a reminder of what you've done to appreciate where you are now, scroll back through your phone and look at all those finished projects and. Or walk through your space and go, I have a whole quilt ladder full of quilts that a year ago, I didn't have any quilts on. So, like, I'm doing something right, and I have to give myself some grace. And I think we all just need to remind ourselves that we have accomplished more than we realize. But we cannot let that negative whip, that negative UFO voice, like, weigh on us. If the bin or the dress or whatever is sitting out and you can see it, if it's bothering you that much but you're not ready to get rid of it, put it away. You can't be looking at it every day. If you're not ready to get rid of it, that's okay. But put it away. Don't. Don't punish yourself by looking at it every day. Like, my cutout bag pattern, I need to just put it away until I'm ready to do a bag project. Because I really do want to make it. I really do. But, like, right now, I don't. Okay, so, like, maybe next year, but. Well, maybe it's just one of those things. I need to put it away. I need to put it away.
- [34:13]
A
One way you should do is put on your calendar for, like, fall and be like, valentine bag make. And then it's ready to go. So then you don't forget about it. And you can be like, yes, I want to make this so it's ready for Valentine's.
- [34:23]
B
Yeah. Yeah.
- [34:24]
A
So you don't forget about it.
- [34:25]
B
I should.
- [34:26]
A
We need homework. Here's the homework, and you and I are going to do this, too. So we're giving you homework, but we are going to do this homework. Bethany doesn't know that I'm holding us accountable, but we are. That homework is. Pick one project. Pick one unfinished project and decide, am I getting rid of it or am I finishing it? And then finish it. Don't just say, like. Don't just say, like, yes, I'm gonna finish it and then put it away again. No, we're either finishing or we're getting rid of. That's what we're doing.
- [34:54]
B
But can I take it a step further of accountability? And this is optional, but when you pick that project, and we would love it if you would post in our Facebook group, the Social Sewist, if you released it or finished it and just post a picture, or if you just want to let us know in a little message, we would love to support your decision. There's no right or wrong answer. It's your decision, and we're not here to judge what you decide to do with your project. Or if you're like, hey, I want to release this project. Does anybody want it? You can put that in our Facebook group. Like, there may be someone that's like, I'll take that off your hands. That's exactly what I'm learning right now. That's what I'm practicing. Or that's what I love to do. Okay, cool. Like, take it on, Take it on. But I think that adds some accountability. So if you feel the call to tackle this with one of your whips, please do. But I love. When we talked to Baruchka earlier in the podcast last year, she. She's like, I don't really like the idea of whips because there's this pressure to finish them, and it's okay to not finish it. It may have served its purpose already halfway done. Like, I don't even like the concept of whips, because if it's. If it's still hanging on and you're not motivated to finish it, its purpose has been done. You've gotten what you needed to out of it, even if it's not done and you can release it. And I love that sometimes when, if you want to go back and hear Varuschka's episode, I really encourage. Everything she says is so profound. But, like, that one really stuck with me because usually you hear about people talking about whips, let's do our whips. Let's, you know, like, as it's a positive. But I love that she's like, nah. Like, I don't know why this is such a thing. We can let them go. Like, be done. You have served your purpose. You are no longer taking up space in my mind or space in my room. And I release you, you know, And I'm like, you know, and maybe I need to go back and listen to that one myself. But if we all share maybe between now and, like, the next episode. So you got, like, two weeks. You should decide. You don't have to finish it in those two weeks, but, like, decide what are. What I'm this is the project. This is what it is. And maybe if you do want to finish it, maybe set a time frame, like a goal of like, I'd like to finish this by March or whatever it is. And we'll work on these things together and hold each other accountable. And when you do finish it, you can share a finished picture. We are doing a social spotlight this week and that is where we highlight someone that we think you should follow because we follow them and we love them. Audra, who's your social spotlight?
- [37:14]
A
So mine is Holly Ann Knight from String and Story. Her Instagram handle is at String and Story, all spelled out. I've known Hollyann for, I don't know, quite a few years now. She is wonderful. Her specialty is free motion quilting and she is an incredible teacher. How to free motion quilt on your domestic. How to free motion quilt on your longarm. She is a rock star. She's got a monthly membership you can sign up for. I took her class, I think, like three years ago. She's just an incredible person. She has so much knowledge. She will be at quiltcon, so definitely make sure to seek out her booth and say hi. Check out her latest membership. But I love seeing what she's doing. She's always such a bright light, so positive and encouraging all of her rock stars, as she calls them, to just try free motion quilting and see what you can do with it. She's got great panels you can practice on. I really love the way she approaches free motion quilting and I just wanted to plug her because I think everybody should follow Holly Ann or be part of her membership.
- [38:13]
B
I actually follow her and I get her newsletter. She has like this free little mini thing like tips on getting started with longarming that I downloaded and read through. And I looked at some of her panels. Some of most of them were sold out, so I'm hoping that she restocks them soon or maybe they already are by the time this airs. But, like, I love her stuff and I love all that she does. So yeah, she's a great follower. I love that you go to her. Yeah. And I hope I get to meet her at Cool Con. I've never met her. Oh, yeah, that'd be exciting. Okay. My social spotlight is Kara from the Little Golden Fox in Madison, Indiana. If you've been following along on my Instagram, you know that I went on an impromptu last minute trip to spend the weekend at Kara's in Madison. So it's like three and a half hours from me. She let Biscuit come with me. So Biscuit and I went. We had the best time hanging out together, having a little girls trip. She has this beautiful historic home that's an Airbnb that I got to stay at. And then it's literally a block over from her store. And it's. It's like a creative person's haven. You walk in and it's not just quilting fabrics, but there's yarn and there's painting and there's pottery, and there's like, anything you could possibly want to create in this space. And it's a big space. And so her and I spent the weekend together, decided to add some retreats to her schedule with me teaching. So, you know, I'm doing three retreats on my own this year, but I'm doing now three retreats at her place as well. And all six retreats are different. So I'm really excited about it. We're going to incorporate her retreats, not just sewing, but some other types of crafts as well. So if you want to try some fun new things. But I'm really excited. Kara is a gem. She's lived in Madison her whole life. She knows everybody that girls everywhere we went, she's like, oh, hey. Oh, hey. She just knows it's the cutest small town and it's a very historic town, which you would probably really love, Audra, because it is. I'm not sure if I'm going to say this right, but in the US or maybe even globally, but in the US it is the longest string of, like, historic buildings that have been preserved. It is, it is. And it's all walkable. It's beautiful. They keep the twinkle lights up year round. I mean, like, they go all out and they really invest a lot in their town, and it's definitely a destination place. So I'm excited to get to incorporate some of that history with our retreats that we're going to have there. So go follow the little. It's actually ittlegoldenfox on Instagram, and their website is the littlegoldenfox.com for upcoming retreats. We have one in April. And for those of you who didn't get to come to one of my retreats last year in 2025, where we did the jelly roll rugs. That's what we're going to do in April because people have been requesting it and her friends have been. Her local friends have been asking for that and they wanted me to come teach it. So I'm going to do a jelly roll rug retreat in April. At her store for the weekend. And we have cute Airbnbs for you. Stay. It's very fun. We're gonna have so much fun. But yeah, so just go to her website and follow her. Follow me and you'll get all the information. But I'm so excited. And that one, the registration is opening this Friday. So this is airing on the 27th. And on Friday is the registration opening for the April retreat. So super excited for that one. And that'll not be on my website. That'll be on her website. The registration for the. Those retreats, I'm just. She's hosting it and I'm teaching it. So we're kind of doing it together. I'm really excited.
- [41:37]
A
You get to go with fun.
- [41:38]
B
Get to go teach. Yeah, I love teaching. I get to see more people and
- [41:42]
A
I think that's kind of your. You love to see it too, isn't it?
- [41:45]
B
It is. It is. It really is how you love to see it. Just because I went from having three retreats, three opportunities to meet people and sew together in person to like doubling that this year, which was unexpected and I love it so much. I'm so excited. But now I get to meet even more of you. And her retreats will have up to 20 people. So they're going to be a good size but like not too big. So we can really hang out and get. Get to know each other and have so much fun together. So anyways, that's my. You love to see it. It's just getting to see more of you in person this year through the year. Yeah.
- [42:16]
A
All right. My love to see it is 2026 for me. As I talked about in the last episode, the end of 2025 just had some roughness to it and 2026 is definitely starting off in a more grounded place, a more balanced place. And that's feeling really good. I feel like mentally I've got a little bit more space than I did in 2025, especially at the end of 2025. It's been a slog here the last couple months to kind of dig back out, but it's feeling really good to just feel grounded and a little bit more clear headed again. And yeah, it's just finding balance and it's feeling good in 2026 is starting off just in a more intentional and emotionally balanced place and not so not putting so much pressure on myself. I'm clearing the. Clearing the deck a little bit. Not feeling so pressured because everything was like a lot of it was just self induced. So I'M just doing a better job at not adding self induced pressure to myself.
- [43:21]
B
Yeah. Saying no more and yes less. You know what I mean? Just balancing like the, like you want to do all the things, but like checking in and going, can I really?
- [43:30]
A
And do I want to do the things? And then also kind of like we approach with these WIPs is am I putting something off because it feels hard and is it really as hard as I'm making it feel or am I saying yes because it's going to be easy and then once I get in and is it really not so easy and then it feels like a slog. So just really being a little bit more honest with myself and how I feel about things versus just like, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And then all of a sudden like being like, no, no, no, no. So anyway, just more balanced. And that just feels, it feels really, really good.
- [44:06]
B
Yeah, I'm proud of you. And that's hard to do, but it's good to know that you like recognize that and are taking action and you're seeing results and that's always, that's all that you can do. And that's wonderful that you're doing it. So next week we are going to kind of continue with this moment. And we talked about what defines you as a sewist, what motivates you to sew. Now we've talked about what's weighing on you. These whips, these UFOs, all those kind of things. The next episode right before Valentine's is all about loving your sewing room or your sewing space, whatever that looks like for you. One thing I did over the holidays was a massive purge. Some of that was whips and, and truly like releasing and creating space and having a place for everything. And just we're going to share some things that work for us that you might want to consider for your space. You might have some ideas that for our audience as well. We'd love to hear those, but it's really just a matter of like, let's put some love into our space so that it continues to love us back and helps us spark that creativity and that joy that we always get from sewing. So that's what we're going to talk about next week. Kind of goes into resetting us this year in these first three episodes of the year. And then we're going to jump into some like, hard topics and then we're going to quiltcon. So we've got a lot coming on and I'm super excited about it. But join us next week. Make sure you're following us on Instagram, Facebook, join our Facebook group, the Social Sewas, and of course, subscribe to our YouTube channel. You can always leave comments over there as well because we have a video version. If you're listening to our podcast, we do have a video version. If you would like to see our lovely silly faces while we're talking, you can see those too. Sometimes we hold things up. We have fun background, whatever. Anyways, we appreciate you listening and we'll see you next week.
- [45:44]
A
See ya. Happy sewing.
- [45:45]
B
Bye.