Mass Distraction Conspiracy Theories!

Summary

Podcast Title: The Shane Dawson Podcast
Episode: Mass Distraction Conspiracy Theories!
Host/Author: Shane Dawson
Release Date: July 21, 2025

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Introduction and Special Guest Celebration

Timestamp: 00:42 - 04:19

The episode kicks off with Shane Dawson welcoming back his listeners to a special "birthday party edition" of the podcast. This episode celebrates the birthday of their special guest, Colby, who has previously contributed significantly to the "Conspiracy Corner" segment.

Notable Quote:

Colby: "Hey, welcome back to whatever the hell this is birthday party edition, guys. This is so fun. I'm so excited."

Personal Updates and Big News

Timestamp: 03:26 - 04:03

Amidst the birthday celebrations, Colby shares exciting personal news: his close friend Lizzy is pregnant with a boy. This revelation adds a heartfelt element to the episode, blending humor with genuine joy.

Notable Quote:

Lizzy: "It is a boy."

Transition to a New Set and Production Updates

Timestamp: 04:05 - 05:19

The conversation shifts to behind-the-scenes updates as Colby discusses the transition to a new production set inspired by the iconic "Friends" Central Perk coffee shop. However, unforeseen challenges arise when the air conditioning in their current set breaks down, delaying their move.

Notable Quote:

Colby: "The vibe that I'm going for is very like, Friends Central Perk Coffee shop. It's a big change, guys. I'm a little nervous about it."

Game of Shame: Confessions and Revelations

Timestamp: 22:34 - 68:49

Introduction to the Game:

Colby introduces the "Game of Shame," where each co-host submits secret confessions. These confessions are then read aloud, and the others must guess who the confessions belong to. The segment is filled with laughter, teasing, and surprising revelations.

Notable Confessions:

1. Boner in Karate Class:

   • Confession: "I got a boner in karate class when I was 10." [23:20]
   • Guessed By: Colby
   • Revelation: Spencer shares a detailed and humorous account of the incident, adding depth to the confession.

2. TP'ing a Lesbian's House:

   • Confession: "I have TP'd a lesbian's house." [24:28]
   • Guessed By: Lizzy
   • Revelation: Jared narrates the backstory, emphasizing it wasn't out of malice but rather targeting neighbors perceived as grouchy.

3. Driving Home Drunk:

   • Confession: "I once had to get punched in the face and knocked out so that I didn't drive home drunk." [34:06]
   • Guessed By: Colby
   • Revelation: Chris shares a heartfelt story about a friend intervening to prevent him from driving under the influence.

4. Licking Ants for Their Spiciness:

   • Confession: "I used to lick ants off of trees because I liked how spicy they taste." [29:22]
   • Guessed By: Colby
   • Revelation: Lizzy opens up about her unique childhood curiosity.

5. Eating Twinkies and Vomiting:

   • Confession: "I ate an entire box of Twinkies in one sitting, then proceeded to throw up." [42:37]
   • Guessed By: Chris
   • Revelation: Colby reflects on his impulsive behavior and its aftermath.

Notable Quote:

Shane: "I should have Kanye Wested it. I should have gone up."

Conspiracy Corner: Decoding Mass Distractions

Timestamp: 60:14 - 68:36

In this segment, Chris takes the lead in discussing how mass distractions, particularly those propagated by social media and AI technologies like ChatGPT, are diverting public attention from significant global issues. The hosts delve into various conspiracy theories, examining their origins and potential impacts on society.

Key Topics Discussed:

1. AI and Intellectual Decline:

   • Chris: Highlights concerns that AI tools are making individuals less critical and more reliant on technology for information.
   • Quote:

     Chris: "ChatGPT is nothing to fear because it's actually kind of fairly dumb. But some of these programs are... I can't even begin to comprehend or explain to you what it is that they're doing or building." [67:38]

2. Simpsons Predictions:

   • The hosts explore the phenomenon where "The Simpsons" allegedly predicted real-world events, linking it to the Labubu craze.
   • Notable Prediction Discussed: Maggie possessing Pazuzu, a demon controlling minds, paralleling the Labubu's alleged sinister origins.

3. Labubu Craze and Its Societal Impact:

   • Colby connects the Labubu trend to the predictions from "The Simpsons," suggesting a deeper, possibly darker influence on the younger generation.
   • Quote:

     Colby: "And people are getting in violent fights over the laboon, like, to a point where it's insane." [58:10]

4. Fake Merchandise and Consumer Deception:

   • Discussion about counterfeit merchandise of podcast hosts being sold on major platforms like Walmart.com and Amazon, raising concerns about consumer deception and brand integrity.
   • Quote:

     Jared: "No way. That's a standing stand in front of you for $90." [55:46]

5. Economic Downturns and Media Diversions:

   • Chris theorizes that during economic recessions, media outlets increase sensational and distracting content to divert public attention from economic struggles.
   • Quote:

     Chris: "As we're getting closer and closer to the downfall of our economy, what happens? Aliens start to pop up in Miami..." [61:00]

Merchandise Scams and Brand Authenticity

Timestamp: 50:51 - 55:59

The hosts address growing concerns about counterfeit merchandise being sold purportedly by them on large retail platforms. They express frustration over unauthorized sales of fake products, including books and cardboard cutouts, which mislead fans and tarnish their brand reputation.

Notable Quote:

Colby: "So fake merch, right? Which is kind of crazy. They're also selling whatever the fuck this is. This is a book called Shane Dawson, actor and author with more than 4 billion views." [54:20]

Final Remarks and Recap

Timestamp: 68:36 - 75:09

As the episode nears its end, the hosts recap the night's discussions, emphasizing the blend of personal celebrations with intense conspiracy theories. They also encourage listeners to join their Patreon for exclusive content and behind-the-scenes access, fostering a closer connection with their audience.

Notable Quote:

Colby: "Happy birthday, Kobe. Happy birthday, Colby. Yay. Wow."

Conclusion

This episode of "The Shane Dawson Podcast" masterfully intertwines personal milestones with engaging and thought-provoking discussions on conspiracy theories and societal distractions. Through humorous interactions and candid confessions, the hosts provide listeners with both entertaining and insightful content, all while navigating the challenges of growing their production endeavors.

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Note: The timestamps referenced correspond to points within the provided transcript and serve to highlight significant moments and quotes within the episode.

Transcript

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[Chris]

It's interesting that everyone has this, like, ChatGPT is scary. ChatGPT is scary. I've seen systems that make ChatGPT look like the kid friendly program. Like this thing is getting smarter and smarter and bigger and bigger.

[Colby]

Oh, my God.

[Lizzy]

Kill it.

[Chris]

But some of these programs are. I can't even begin to comprehend or explain to you what it is that they're doing or building.

[Colby]

Oh, my God. Hey, welcome back to whatever the hell this is birthday party edition, guys. This is so fun. I'm so excited. We have a very special guest today. Colby. Colby, our friend and amazing photograph. Friend of the pod. I love saying that. And an icon and a legend and the moment. And the last time he was here was, I think around Christmas. We had so much fun. You really brought a lot to the conspiracy corner, by the way.

[Chris]

That's what I'm saying.

[Colby]

Oh, my God. You started the whole Sabrina Carpenter's wearing a wig.

[Chris]

It is flu. Wig flew.

[Colby]

Wig flew. Snatched it. EBay. Okay. So not only that, I texted Colby and I was like, hey, girl. I didn't say that. I was trying to be relatable to the gates very much. I said, hey. And I was like, you need to come on the show. And I gave him a date. And he was like, okay, perfect. That's my birthday.

[Chris]

We're here.

[Colby]

And I was like, you want to come to our show on your birthday? That's like, a lot.

[Jared]

It is a. I mean, it's a lot. It's like a long day.

[Colby]

It's also pressure for who?

[Chris]

Do y' all not remember the last.

[Jared]

Time we were here?

[Chris]

And I was like, this is the moment. This is the follow up to the Moment. Oh, it's the sequel to the Moment, part two, Electric Boogaloo.

[Colby]

Oh, I love it. So, yes, it's your birthday. How old are you turning today?

[Chris]

28.

[Colby]

Oh, my God. So young.

[Spencer]

He has two more years till twink death. Till it twinkles out.

[Colby]

Oh, no.

[Spencer]

I just learned about this before the podcast.

[Colby]

What?

[Spencer]

But evidently, once you turn 30, it's game over.

[Colby]

It's a twink.

[Spencer]

Like, it's over.

[Jared]

Before this show, we were like, oh, so young. A decade younger than us. He goes, yeah, but you have your families. I'm blacking out out front of what?

[Chris]

The highlight rope?

[Jared]

We're like, yeah, we know what that is.

[Colby]

Okay, guys, listen. I know it's Colby's birthday. We're very excited. Lizzie's pregnant. That's exciting. But something even bigger has happened, and I feel like I just need to talk about it because I've been holding on to it for too long. What? I just don't know if you guys have noticed this, but the party.

[Shane]

Oh.

[Colby]

And There's Modes.

[Spencer]

He's 37, guys. Not many things can overshadow a man's birthday and a life coming into this world, but when you turn that light on, I'm hooked.

[Lizzy]

Did you do that yourself?

[Colby]

Happy pride. It's over. But here we are.

[Jared]

Yeah, he was unscrewing the previous handle, rescrewing that one, charging it with his USB C. You installed that yourself?

[Colby]

I did. Listen, I'm not selling these. I'm not, like, I'm not giving codes, but I'm just saying my life is over. I was on a beach, baby. Yeah. So that's my big news, Lizzy. So your baby. We have a gender. What is it?

[Lizzy]

It is a boy.

[Colby]

Are you terrified?

[Lizzy]

Yes.

[Colby]

Okay, so did you see yourself being, like, boy mom energy?

[Lizzy]

Yeah, but I really thought it was a girl. But I really thought it was a girl.

[Colby]

I think mom thought I was a girl.

[Jared]

My mom thought I was a girl.

[Colby]

Really? Anyways. Okay, okay. We also have to explain why we're still here. Because in the last episode, we said goodbye to this room. This is, like, a really long story. Slow breakup.

[Jared]

It's like, we can't make a final decision on if we're parting ways or not.

[Colby]

No, we can't. We're getting rid of this room.

[Shane]

The problem is getting rid of the room.

[Colby]

Well. Right? It's my house.

[Shane]

Burn it down.

[Colby]

No, but we have our office. We have the set. It's almost done. We've been furniture shopping, getting it all together. We still have to go out to, like, some stores and get some cute little items for Chris and Jared and you guys, little sections. But we were supposed to be filming there today, and then the air conditioning broke, and it's way too hot. In there. So now we're still here. So hopefully in the next episode, we will be on our new set.

[Jared]

Not hopefully, we will be. I'll see you at the office.

[Colby]

Listen, I'm very excited about it because the vibe that I'm going for is very like, Friends Central Perk Coffee shop. It's a big change, guys. I'm a little nervous about it. The couch is, like a totally different color. I don't think we're going to do the neon lights anymore. And, yeah, I guess we'll see you guys there next time. Sorry, Colby, that you're just stuck in our house. Will we really be there next time?

[Chris]

Well, if you want to live, you'll be there next time.

[Colby]

Die of dehydration. Sweat's death, but we'll be there.

[Spencer]

Sauna edition.

[Colby]

This feels like when you say goodbye at any Latino party and there's like a thousand people you have to say bye to. You thought you were leaving, but it's like, oh, the tias. Oh, the cousin. You know, like, it's just never. You never. Yes. You never actually.

[Spencer]

So fun to see a white person experience the Latino goodbye for the first time. I used to pretend to be asleep so I didn't have to say goodbye to people.

[Colby]

Oh, my God. I still do that.

[Shane]

Yeah.

[Spencer]

The mistake a lot of people make is a fake snore.

[Colby]

Oh, too much.

[Spencer]

You can't fake snore. You gotta just barely move.

[Lizzy]

The full cell is if you rip ass audibly and then don't respond to it.

[Colby]

I have a question about that. Okay, so, Jared, if you guys haven't checked out. Jared. Jared and Sandy, their channel is popping off right now. You guys are doing like a House Hunter series.

[Spencer]

Yes.

[Colby]

Where you're checking out different houses in different states. It's really good. Go subscribe. But the one we were watching yesterday, you're with this realtor who you just met 24 hours before that.

[Spencer]

If that.

[Colby]

If that. And you guys are looking around at houses in Utah, which is iconic.

[Shane]

Oh, yeah.

[Colby]

So I'm watching, and you guys are looking at the bathroom. And it's a smaller space. You guys are all, you know, packed in this bathroom. And then Jared just farts. And then the realtor goes.

[Spencer]

There's a little, you know, controversy around it.

[Shane]

Wait, you're saying the controversy is that you didn't fart?

[Colby]

I.

[Spencer]

You know, was it a shoe squeak? Was it a duck outside? We don't know exactly. You know, sometimes happen.

[Jared]

The realtor took it very well.

[Chris]

She.

[Jared]

I heard her in the background say.

[Colby]

Leave it in E Spark. Leave that in the video. Leave it in the video.

[Jared]

Like in the edit. In the edit.

[Shane]

Leave it.

[Jared]

I was like, oh, okay.

[Colby]

That was. That was one of my favorite moments on the Internet, I think.

[Jared]

Yeah, he was. They were just eating what Colby's like, right next to Jared, and Jared's just, like, burps really loud. I was like, oh, no.

[Colby]

Happy birthday. Birthday. Oh, my gosh. Speaking of birthdays, Spencer, do you want to go grab the little thing in the kitchen? Little thing? I think we all know what it is. A new puppy.

[Chris]

Oh, God, no.

[Jared]

That is the worst surprise. When people gift somebody an animal that didn't want an animal.

[Colby]

I just love watching Spencer slowly walk.

[Jared]

He's like, I don't know what to do.

[Colby]

Yay.

[Jared]

To you, cha cha cha.

[Colby]

Happy birthday to you Happy birthday, dear Call me. Happy birthday to you. There's no candles. Oh, no lighters out.

[Chris]

Also, I don't know if you guys can see this, but it says happy birth slay. Oh, love.

[Colby]

So you have to eat the whole thing during the duration, by the end of the episode.

[Chris]

That's the challenge.

[Colby]

Yeah. I broke my I wonder if they.

[Spencer]

Made a Happy Birthday song. Just the perfect amount of length to make awkward people feel the most uncomfortable.

[Colby]

Right?

[Spencer]

Yeah, it's like 45 seconds.

[Colby]

It's too long. Yeah, it's just me. Happy birthday, Happy birthday, Toby. Since we were all singing at different keys, it sounded like a terrifying cult in a horror movie.

[Jared]

We don't know. Also, the straightest thing about Chris is that he has a lighter on him. What?

[Colby]

I know. What's that for?

[Lizzy]

I think Chris does that to flirt with boys.

[Colby]

I identify as a straight man. What is the light for? It used to be forever ago, like, when I was on film sets. I'm shy, and I have a hard time making friends, and a lot of people smoke on film sets, so I'd be. If someone needed a light, I had one, and we could talk, and then it just became a thing that was, like, convenient to have, and I just always keep it on me now. Wow. That and usually, like, a little pocket knife, but I don't have that.

[Jared]

Is that the same one you've had on lighter?

[Colby]

No, I've had many.

[Chris]

Just many, many never.

[Colby]

If you want to be my friend in public, just carry around, like, a diet cocoa, something. Ooh, a little cooler. Or Spencer calls them.

[Shane]

Oh, fridge cigarettes.

[Chris]

Fridgewear.

[Colby]

Okay. Because it's Colby's birthday, I was thinking we should do all of Colby's favorite things today. And I know I've heard from a little birdie that one of Colby's favorite things is. Come on, everyone, it's time for Spencer's likes. He's in the sun. Weird shit. But that's all right. Sometimes I wonder who the hell watches the clutches. But now we know the answer. Spencer does. Spencer times. It's weird or scary or it doesn't make sense. The Internet's a wild place, so let's dive in. We're not gonna judge him. Okay, maybe we might cue up the reel and let's all see Spencer's likes. That's right. It is the return of Spencer's likes. And guys, he's been Spank bank stockpiling for a while and whoa, daddy, it's gonna get wild. I heard that you send Spencer things too much.

[Shane]

Yeah, sometimes Colby will send me something like, hey, this seems like something you'd like. And it's like a fucked up video. But yeah, I do like, no, the.

[Chris]

Most recent one was there's this guy that goes around Disneyland, like, talking to different characters, and he's like, oh, my God, Donald. Like, I do impressions. Can I do an impression for you? He gets real close and he goes, hey, I'm the duck guy. And it's like these short videos, but I'm like, this just gives Spencer energy, right?

[Colby]

It's me. I'm the duck guy.

[Shane]

Well, let's check some of those videos out today.

[Colby]

Oh, my God. Okay, here. The. I will say YouTube rarely, like, gives us shit for things we do on this show. And we've done some crazy fucking theories. The only time I've ever had to take things out of the episodes is during a Spencer's like segment. I literally will get like. It'll be like, demonetized. Cannot show Blur this. And I'm like, this is a risky segment.

[Jared]

So you can show more on Instagram than YouTube.

[Lizzy]

Yeah, yeah. You can show like full titties on Instagram.

[Shane]

Well, people aren't like, monetizing like a.

[Chris]

Post or something, right?

[Jared]

I guess it's like. Okay.

[Shane]

All right, so I figured, should we start off. This is a simple one. This one just makes me laugh. I don't really know what we're starting off easy. And then we'll go into it.

[Colby]

Oh, no. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Okay. Oh, my God. Are they gonna die? What is happening?

[Shane]

No, it's not that bad.

[Jared]

Is it a.

[Colby]

Okay.

[Jared]

Oh, no. He continues.

[Colby]

Okay.

[Chris]

Please tell me that's the whole.

[Jared]

Yes, I think you should recreate it.

[Shane]

This one, it's like why post that take? Do another one. You knew we knew what you were trying to do and it didn't.

[Colby]

That was.

[Chris]

That might have been the best take. And he did all of that in Crocs where also.

[Shane]

So this is also. It says right here, study room. So they're clearly in like a school or something.

[Colby]

That was starting slow. Yeah.

[Shane]

Yeah. Well, we're going to ramp it up real quick.

[Chris]

What is this thumbnail?

[Shane]

So this is this one. I'm pretty sure. I think this is the farting guy. It better be Jared.

[Colby]

Egg Fart released.

[Chris]

Let's see the radius.

[Jared]

Egg.

[Colby]

What?

[Shane]

So he likes to sort of see how far it goes before people smell his fart.

[Colby]

Honestly. Boom. No.

[Spencer]

No, it is funky.

[Chris]

A scorcher.

[Colby]

My apologies. This is crazy. Boom.

[Spencer]

This could be considered biological warfare.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Shane]

So he does a lot of this sort of stuff. This is all his pages. Is he. It's different. So this, he does a lot of egg farts. He does some other type of farts.

[Lizzy]

Egg farts.

[Shane]

That's what that. Those seem like based on reactions. Those seem like the worst.

[Lizzy]

Like a sulfurous.

[Shane]

Yeah. Maybe you eat a bunch of hard boiled eggs or something.

[Lizzy]

Yeah, it does smell funky.

[Spencer]

Do you think you've had a influence on people's posts? They're like, I want to get liked by Spencer.

[Shane]

Oh, I don't know.

[Spencer]

I think this could be because of you.

[Shane]

Dude, I've had a lot of DMs like, Hey, I have to unfollow you. You ruined my algorithm. I don't know why mine show up more than other people.

[Chris]

Amplify.

[Shane]

I guess I do a lot of them.

[Colby]

Every single one of my.

[Shane]

Usually in the morning I wake up and that's my sort of morning routine as I look at this sort of stuff.

[Colby]

Or maybe they're seeing other people's too, but you're just not really thinking about it. Because it's not. Because it's not terrible.

[Lizzy]

I mean there's six likes and the one that's in common is Spencer. I was trying to explain this to my husband. So now when I get a Spencer's like, I send it to my husband. He goes, what the fuck? I'm like, no, this is Spencer. This is what I'm telling you.

[Shane]

I'm glad. I'm saying, supporting your marriage, it's the.

[Colby]

Only thing we talk about.

[Shane]

All right. So I figured this is a nice palate cleanser. This is one of my favorite guys. I don't know if Jared. Jared and I actually share a lot of Singing likes on Instagram. But this guy always just sings outside the barbershop and he just kind of makes me happy. This is more just a good vibe.

[Colby]

I'm the type of guy that will treat you with respect. Yeah. Treated like a. A lady. Treated like a lady.

[Jared]

I'm hitting my buzzer.

[Shane]

Wow. Post like the AC post. He'll like. He'll be wearing the same outfit. 20 videos, same outfit, different song. He just. He just is grinding outside of his barber shop. All right, so I guess we can keep going. This is more of a. One of the AI ones that have been happening.

[Colby]

Oh, my God. Oh, I love it. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God.

[Shane]

I don't know where to show. Show that or not.

[Jared]

That's Shane when I'm eating.

[Spencer]

Oh, I think if you just say it's AI, it's fine.

[Shane]

But yeah, this is a. This is a big trend on of these.

[Colby]

Hold on.

[Chris]

Is that what the scene from Men in Black?

[Shane]

Oh, yeah, it is.

[Colby]

But also, I literally tried to get jet. I was making a thumbnail and I, like, was trying to get chatgpt to make my face turn into glitter. And it was like, sorry, we can't do that. It goes against our policies.

[Shane]

Wait, really?

[Colby]

Yeah. You can't put glitter on my head. What the fuck is this?

[Lizzy]

This isn't chatgpt.

[Colby]

What is this?

[Lizzy]

It's. Well, you can pay for other AI programs and they'll do whatever you tell them to do.

[Chris]

I'm gonna go out on a limb and guess it's Sora.

[Colby]

I don't. Or the new Google one Spencer's likes.

[Shane]

Oh, this is one that actually is for Chris.

[Chris]

Oh, for me?

[Colby]

What the fuck is happening?

[Shane]

So I don't know what the fetish is here, but.

[Chris]

I don't know, but it's kind of working for me.

[Shane]

That's a short one, but.

[Colby]

Oh. What? Why is that for Chris?

[Chris]

I get it.

[Colby]

Wow.

[Lizzy]

Why Spencer? Why that?

[Shane]

I don't know. I just think. I just think it.

[Colby]

You liked that publicly.

[Shane]

I actually liked it.

[Jared]

Now you're getting some gay rumors on Reddit.

[Shane]

Oh, yeah, Trust me, I'm aware.

[Colby]

Wow.

[Shane]

I'm not beating the rumors today.

[Colby]

Yeah.

[Shane]

This is just a. So this person.

[Colby]

What is that? I don't.

[Shane]

I don't really get it, but they just eat a lot of crickets or something like that.

[Colby]

Oh, no.

[Shane]

I don't know why. Some are in jars.

[Colby]

Oh, my. Okay. No, no, I hate it.

[Chris]

Is it in a bag?

[Colby]

No, that was a bigger jumpstart. That is not who I was expecting behind the camera.

[Shane]

He gives a face.

[Colby]

Delicious locust. I wish I had a little bit.

[Jared]

Of honey with it.

[Colby]

Is he German?

[Jared]

I almost feel like he's AI.

[Colby]

I feel woozy.

[Jared]

Me too.

[Colby]

This segment has really thrown me through a loop.

[Lizzy]

Oh, there's more.

[Colby]

What is that?

[Shane]

That might be about there's one more fat guy. Then there's a 87 year old.

[Chris]

That's a video of me in the future.

[Colby]

Yeah. You choose. Kobe. Happy birthday.

[Chris]

I need to know what the old lady is doing.

[Colby]

Okay.

[Shane]

I think she has an only fans.

[Colby]

Thank God.

[Chris]

What a icon.

[Jared]

Somebody else can check it for me when it's my party. 87 years old.

[Colby]

Here he is. It's amazing.

[Jared]

I am so happy to have lived this long.

[Colby]

Pre. Wow.

[Jared]

Look at this. Although I think it should be draped down quite a bit.

[Lizzy]

But look at how wonderful is this.

[Jared]

She's like Spencer and he jumps in frame.

[Colby]

Would be insane.

[Chris]

You better explain.

[Jared]

I'm not good at returning.

[Colby]

How are you in returning?

[Jared]

How are you returning? Honestly, Good for her.

[Lizzy]

I don't do returns either.

[Chris]

I think she's kind of hot.

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Colby]

Yeah. I love her. She should come on the show. I would love that. Oh my God. Spencer. A dating show Season two with Miss Mermaid.

[Jared]

I really think, Spencer, that you need to coordinate one of these yourself.

[Colby]

So.

[Jared]

So that you just walk into frame after the weirdest thing.

[Colby]

That would be great.

[Shane]

But that's half of the allure is.

[Spencer]

You can't write this stuff.

[Colby]

That's exactly it.

[Shane]

Exactly.

[Spencer]

Like I can't imagine thinking of any of this.

[Shane]

That's why I like it. Yeah.

[Chris]

Well, I think the other follow up too is how many videos does she have that she never has posted? Like, what is the other comic book?

[Colby]

I want to see the graphs.

[Chris]

That's what I'm saying.

[Colby]

Grandma's drafts.

[Lizzy]

I don't know that Grandma's has drafts.

[Shane]

Yeah.

[Jared]

I feel like you filmed it. It's up.

[Colby]

Yeah. Hey. Oh my gosh. Okay. Sorry to interrupt the show. I'm so excited. Do you guys notice where I am? What's happening? I am in my new office, in our new headquarters. Our production studio, our space, Our home away from home. So if you haven't been following the journey, I'm not going to talk about it too much because I don't want to annoy you guys talking about the Patreon stuff. But we've basically been trying to build out a studio and a production company and it's all happening. And we're finally in our office. No pressure. You can check it out. The journey if you're want. Nothing here is going to change. Like, we literally have an office. It really does feel like a dream come true. I walk in every day, like, almost crying every single day, which, you know, isn't a healthy work environment, but it's me. And this might not be my official setup. I don't really know. Like, everything's still kind of out of order and not really built yet. But let me give you a little show and tell. So here I have my Garfield, which, if you saw this in Ryland's vlog, we went Labubu hunting and I fell in love with him. Look at him. It looks like Cheeto. I love it. Cheeto with a gun. That's dangerous. Then obviously I have my Labubu on display. Oh, yeah, Clock, The Labubu bag. And then I also have, like, things that I never really put on display before because I felt weird, like, I don't know, in my house. But I have some awards that I'm really proud of. My shorty, my people's choice. I have my YouTube play button. I finally took it out of the bathroom, guys. I cleaned it. Took it out of the bathroom. This is a big moment for me, but also a big moment for my play button. He's finally getting a view of something that's not someone taking a shit. And I love that for him. I also have my books, my tablets, Titanic, vhs, it's all here. So thank you guys so much for being a part of the journey, being a part of my YouTube life for so long. I'm so grateful. So thank you. Okay, let's get to the ads. Don't leave, please, because this next sponsor is one of my favorites and one that's been with me since the very beginning. So thank you so much. Seatgeek. So, yes, this episode is sponsored by seatgeek. If you don't already know, how do you not know about SeatGeek? Guys, they are the geek of seat. Your seat needs a geek. They got you covered. I don't know what that means. Let me actually explain. With over 28 million downloads, SeatGeek is the number one rated ticketing app. There's over 70,000 events on SeatGeek. Concerts, comedy shows, festivals. Anything that needs a ticket, they got it and they have it for the best possible price. And everybody's on tour right now. I know I'm sitting here like, you know, on my big seat, just taking a geek. But all your favorite artists are out on tour. Beyonce, Kendrick Lamar, and Sza. Shakira. Chris Stapleton, Lady Gaga, Coldplay, Katy Perry, Morgan Wallen, Post Malone, Shout Out, Posty, dua, Lipa, Tate McCrae. Guys, the weekend. Hi. All week long. Know what I'm saying? It's confusing. They're all out there and you can get the best possible seats on seat. They rate them for you from 1 to 10. So basically, if you click on a concert you want to go to, say you're like looking at the postage show and you're like, oh my God, gotta get my tickets. You look at a seat, if it has a little red dot that means eh, this is way overpriced. Don't do it. Has a little green dot that means ding. This is good to go. You're getting your money's worth and every ticket is backed by their buyer. Gate guaranteed. The seatgeek is giving you guys a very special discount. All you got to do is click the link in the description below, download the app and use code GROWER2025 to get 10% off your next set of tickets at se. That's 10% off your tickets with promo code GROWER2025. So thank you seatgeek and thank you guys for being you. I appreciate you. Okay, enjoy the rest of the episode. Bye.

[Spencer]

Hi, I'm Danny Lopriore. Ever get the feeling you're being watched online? It's not paranoia, it's data brokers. These companies collect your personal information, including your browsing habits, where you live and even who you're related to. And they sell it to the highest bidder. That's where aura comes in. Aura automatically removes your personal info from data broker sites and keeps it off. It also monitors the dark web, safeguards your devices, alerts you to real time threats and more. Start your free [e-mail] control. That's a U R A.com control for your free trial.

[Colby]

Well, speaking of things that maybe we should have kept to ourselves, it's time to play the game of shame. The game of shame. I like to put extra cheese whiz on my Oreos. Shame. I actually enjoy the smell of my forest. I think about my teacher during sex. Shame, shame Tell us the truth so we can judge you. The game of shame Shame on you. Oh God, I love that song. It is, right? It's sexy.

[Jared]

Almost like she's an official co host of this show. The amount of songs she has produced for us. She really is icon.

[Colby]

Icon. Okay, Colby, are you so excited for the game of shame? Have you prepared some? Do you, have you ever played this game Before?

[Chris]

I don't think I haven't. But when I sent my list to Spencer, his reply was. He's like, where have you been? Every other time we've played this. So my guess is it might be a little obvious which ones are Spencer's.

[Jared]

Like, where have these been? On my Instagram feed.

[Colby]

Okay, so if you haven't seen this before the Game of Shame, we all put in ourselves secret confessions. Spencer has mixed them all up. He's gonna read them one by one, and on our whiteboards, we have to guess who we think the shameful confession came from.

[Shane]

So I'm gonna read out a confession from one of the people in this room.

[Jared]

Ready?

[Shane]

This is a simple one. Nice, easy starter. I got a boner in karate class when I was 10.

[Jared]

Jared.

[Shane]

Don't say it. Okay, is everyone ready?

[Chris]

Yeah.

[Jared]

Oh, shit. No. I've got a pivot.

[Shane]

I don't want cheating. I see some cheating going on over the doors. Reveal in 3, 2, 1.

[Colby]

Me. I was right.

[Lizzy]

You are so annoying.

[Jared]

He was looking so fucking guilty over there. And why are you going like this?

[Spencer]

There's Kobe.

[Chris]

Bad luck. He's an artist.

[Colby]

Wait, I was in karate with you?

[Spencer]

Yeah, we share karate classes. But I just remember sitting there, Indian style, we were doing the whole like, and I just looked down at that. I'm cracking a fatty right now, and I'm about to have to stand up and, like, show everybody in the class what I learned. Luckily, it subsided. My underwear was tight enough to keep it at bay. Yeah, and that was only a yellow belt, you know? Nothing to be proud of.

[Shane]

Yeah, if you're a black belt, you can be proud.

[Spencer]

You're cracking fatties all the time. But not as a yellow belt.

[Colby]

Right?

[Shane]

Okay, you guys ready for the next one?

[Colby]

That was starting slow.

[Shane]

Okay, we'll do another surprise. A short one. I have TP'd a lesbian's house.

[Colby]

Lizzy.

[Jared]

I like a hate crime on her own.

[Colby]

She's not a lesbian.

[Jared]

Okay? Look at her Instagram Explore page and tell me differently.

[Lizzy]

That's all nails.

[Colby]

Colby's acting right now. He's giving actor right now.

[Lizzy]

Was it you, Shane?

[Colby]

I do love lesbians.

[Lizzy]

So you'd never TP1?

[Colby]

Never. Okay.

[Shane]

All right. Reveal in three, two, one. It is no one. Got it. It was Rylan.

[Colby]

Whoa.

[Spencer]

Damn. Rylan.

[Jared]

During Pride Month. Picture this. No. No. In high school, my. I don't know what came over my best friend and I, but there were lesbians.

[Colby]

Homophobia.

[Jared]

No. And they were always kind of just grouchy, you know? They were just. They were a little honest.

[Lizzy]

Your lesbian neighbors.

[Jared]

And my friend had the idea to TP their house, and so we did. But the problem is he lives, like, directly diagonal from their house. And they watched us walk back in to his house, and they came and they rang the doorbell in the morning and told my best friend's parents on us. Like, we watched them walk back in here, and his dad was like, oh, yeah. Oh, yeah, I'll take care of this. I'll take care of this. And his dad walks out upstairs, and he's like, you guys fucked up your approach.

[Colby]

Oh.

[Shane]

He was, like, not mad at us.

[Jared]

At all because they were just. It wasn't because they were lesbians. They were just grouchy all the time, you know?

[Colby]

We love lesbians. Love. I really do. That's like a thing where it's like, you know the overlap where it's like in Modern Family, they're like, gays don't get along with lesbians and whatever. And, like, I don't. That's never been the case.

[Shane]

All right, this is a little. This is an interesting one. I once showed up to a Ross in only a towel, and the homeless woman inside the store told the cashier she thought I was going to steal and that if I did, she would cover the cost.

[Spencer]

I want to say Chris, he always looks guilty.

[Shane]

That's true.

[Jared]

Yeah, it's Chris. He always shops at Ross. He tells me about it.

[Colby]

Why would you go to Ross naked? Okay. Was this a dream? Okay. All right.

[Shane]

Three, two, one. Reveal it.

[Spencer]

Oh, that's Spencer.

[Shane]

Wow.

[Colby]

Colby.

[Shane]

Holy Lizzy God.

[Colby]

Oh, kolaying yourself.

[Jared]

Oh, my God.

[Chris]

Okay, so New Year's Eve countdown a couple of years ago. It's like a festival out in San Bernardino. I had made this custom outfit so slay, but it rained, and so the outfit's falling apart. Drenching. We're back in this hotel room after getting caught in a monsoon outside, and the outfit had literally deteriorated. But I had to go to Denny's in the morning because I was hungover and I had no clothes. So I literally took a towel from the hotel, wrapped myself in it, walked inside, and the homeless lady literally goes over to the cashier and goes, if he steals anything, I'll cover the cost.

[Colby]

Oh, my God. That is so nice.

[Chris]

Love it.

[Jared]

Wow. I was convinced it was you because you love Russ.

[Chris]

I do love Russ.

[Shane]

You're not wrong. You guys ready for the next one? Scores are currently Shane Chris Brown. Does he have. Okay, this one's easy. I recently, recently touched Tips with a stranger.

[Jared]

Oh, so it's got to be a boy. Chris.

[Colby]

Was the tip hard?

[Chris]

Oh, wait, no, that is.

[Shane]

Was the unknown information.

[Jared]

Fatty cracked or not person that talks like that here.

[Spencer]

I do think this could easily have happened at a spa that somebody goes to naked.

[Colby]

Oh, give it away.

[Jared]

But you don't have a towel on.

[Colby]

Yeah. Wait, is this mentor part of this?

[Shane]

I am. Yeah.

[Colby]

Yeah. Did I just call you a Spencer? It's a Spencer.

[Chris]

You're never beating these allegations.

[Shane]

I did all deeds.

[Chris]

Did someone just clip that one part of Spencer reading the sentence, I touched tips with a stranger.

[Colby]

Ooh, put a beat on it.

[Shane]

I recently touched tips with a stranger.

[Spencer]

Touched tips with a stranger.

[Shane]

Touched tips. Touched tips with a stranger. All right, everyone, ready? Three, two, one, reveal.

[Colby]

Okay, it was me.

[Jared]

I knew it.

[Shane]

All, you guys. Fuck you guys for thinking that I did.

[Colby]

What the fuck does that mean? I talk like that?

[Jared]

Like, I just knew that that verbiage was you.

[Colby]

Well, I did walk in after it happened, and I looked at you and I said, I touched tips.

[Jared]

You don't even remember what?

[Colby]

How do you not remember our threat to our relationship?

[Jared]

I actually don't remember this.

[Colby]

You don't?

[Shane]

No.

[Colby]

Okay, let me set the scene. So it was, like, three days ago. And love, I ordered a coffee on Postmates. Oh, yeah. And it was my favorite postmate. We've talked about him before.

[Jared]

Sometimes I feel like he's a threat to our marriage.

[Colby]

Anyways. Every time he comes, he hugs me.

[Jared]

He doesn't just hug him. He jumps out of his car, smiles from ear to ear, is like, oh, Shane.

[Colby]

But then you touched it. Tips were touched. I'm pretty sure it was tips. What's he saw?

[Jared]

That was the amount of things, sexual or not.

[Shane]

Okay, you ready for the next one? I used to lick ants off of trees because I liked how spicy they taste.

[Jared]

Oh, my gosh.

[Spencer]

That's a Lizzie thing. Lizzie's being very, very.

[Jared]

Actually, that is herself right now. Lizzy would do that.

[Spencer]

And she was looking at what Rylan's writing like, does he know it's me?

[Colby]

You're selling me. I could see Spencer's still doing that.

[Lizzy]

I think it's Chris. I think it is Chris.

[Shane]

Okay, everyone had answer.

[Colby]

Yeah.

[Shane]

Three, two, one, reveal.

[Colby]

Ah.

[Lizzy]

Jared, you spelled my name wrong.

[Shane]

No one got it. It is our special guest, Colby.

[Chris]

Damn it, they're spicy.

[Colby]

What?

[Chris]

Okay, here's the thing.

[Jared]

So, like, you ever season your food with them?

[Shane]

No.

[Chris]

You ever, like, remember as a kid, like, licking a D battery?

[Colby]

Yes.

[Chris]

Okay.

[Lizzy]

Because they Taste like pennies.

[Chris]

Because it was like a weird, like little shot.

[Lizzy]

Oh, yes, that too.

[Chris]

Like sometimes if I need to feel something. Yeah, yeah, but so yeah, when you like eat ants, it has that same little like.

[Colby]

Oh no.

[Chris]

Yeah.

[Shane]

Cuz they're fighting for their lives.

[Chris]

Yeah, yeah, I'm talking like straight.

[Jared]

They're biting the tree.

[Colby]

Oh.

[Chris]

Keep in mind this isn't like yesterday.

[Shane]

It's like a week ago.

[Lizzy]

No, I truly thought it was Chris.

[Chris]

It does.

[Jared]

You can't look at Chris or you start to believe it's him.

[Chris]

Wow, they were good.

[Shane]

That was the only one. When Covid texted me the list and it's an interesting list. I was the only one. I was like, you used to eat pants.

[Jared]

It's a pretty good reel.

[Colby]

I feel closer to you now.

[Lizzy]

Yeah, because you also did it and you just didn't tell us.

[Colby]

I never.

[Chris]

I didn't submit that.

[Colby]

Guys, I have some bad news. I know. No bad news at the office. The vibe is too good. But I'm just going to give you a little taste of it. Do you feel that? That little drop sweat rolling down your back? Oop, Just made it to the crack. Oh no, my glasses are fogging. I'm not wearing glasses, but if I was, it'd be misty. This only means one thing. I need to go to the doctor. What's happening? This only means two things. It's summer, guys. I don't know about you, but every summer I have a little routine I like to do. I like to stick in some earbuds, play some music really loud, drown out those dark dots. Thank God these Raycons are still working. That's right. Today's episode is sponsored by Raycon. If you guys don't already know, they make the best affordable, high quality, beautiful earbuds. They are called Raycon's Everyday Earbuds. And they are the perfect summer accessory. They have 32 hours of battery life and multi point connectivity that pairs with two devices at once. This is their latest model. They've done some upgrading. You can literally connect to like your phone, your laptop. You can do two things at the same time. And they come in beautiful colors. It's not just the standard two colors. They come in purple and pink and rose, gold and green and really, really nice. And the case matches the earbuds. So like you get a beautiful case and then you open it and they match. It's very monochromatic. It's a big word for me. Beautiful. And they have active noise cancellation and my favorite isolation mode. When you just Want to tune out the haters? And Raycon is giving you guys a very special deal. All you got to do is go to buyraycon.com grower to get 15 off Raycon's best selling everyday earbuds. That's buyraycon.com growers to get 15% off of your everyday earbuds. I love my Raycons. They're beautiful. They're so cute. They're such good quality. They last a long time and they really are a statement. It's giving Labubu energy. People are like, where'd you get those? Where did you find lavender purple earbuds? All right, enjoy the rest of the episode and thank you. Raycon Isolated. What?

[Chris]

I.

[Shane]

All right, you guys ready?

[Colby]

Yes. Yeah.

[Shane]

When I was a child, I thought my mother had lost her leg at a theme park.

[Colby]

Oh, my God. God, that's terrifying.

[Jared]

Shane's overacting.

[Lizzy]

I think it's Chris.

[Colby]

It's Ryland.

[Chris]

You're acting. I'm going Ryland. Only just because I feel like Vicky's, like, just getting back into theme parks, right? And maybe it was like, maybe that was the moment she saw that was a trauma.

[Jared]

Spencer's looking guilty and Jared's looking, like, suspicious.

[Colby]

I don't know the story if it's Jared, okay?

[Jared]

He's covering for his brother.

[Spencer]

I gotta be right one of these times.

[Shane]

All right, does everyone have an answer? I don't know. 3, 2, 1, reveal.

[Lizzy]

Rylan couldn't act that good.

[Colby]

Yes, Jared. Got it. It is Lizzy. Oh, really?

[Spencer]

Just so you guys can get my.

[Lizzy]

Point in, it was me.

[Colby]

What happened?

[Shane]

I knew it.

[Lizzy]

I was a little girl. I was a wee young thing, and I lost my parents at a theme park. And the only female figure I saw at this gift shop I walked into was a woman who had a leg. Just one. And I went up to her and I was like, mama, what happened to your leg? Because I was so small, too, that all I could see were legs or leg.

[Chris]

Leg.

[Lizzy]

And so I looked up at the individual leg owner and realized, oh, no.

[Chris]

That'S the politically correct. The leg owner.

[Colby]

The leg owner.

[Spencer]

The amp you sheet.

[Colby]

That's incredible.

[Chris]

Please welcome to the stage M E.

[Lizzy]

M G. I want aunt you merch.

[Shane]

Yeah.

[Spencer]

We need to be more inclusive with our drag queens. Okay, Whoa.

[Colby]

This is a good game. Let's keep giving you things, you know, and then you give us a drag game. Okay?

[Shane]

I once had to get punched in the face and knocked out so that I didn't drive home drunk.

[Colby]

Chris.

[Lizzy]

Does Chris get That drunk though.

[Chris]

I can see it at club.

[Colby]

I've seen it.

[Lizzy]

The way you're talking makes me want to change my answer.

[Jared]

Don't.

[Shane]

Well, you hurry up because the door is closed.

[Lizzy]

Can I have two answers?

[Jared]

No.

[Lizzy]

Okay, okay, okay, okay.

[Shane]

Does everyone have an answer? Yes.

[Lizzy]

It's Chris.

[Shane]

Three, two, one, reveal. I think it's.

[Spencer]

I knew it was fucking cold.

[Shane]

It is cold.

[Colby]

Damn it. Whoa.

[Shane]

I knew it.

[Colby]

I think it's all cold.

[Shane]

I told you. You sent me like 10.

[Chris]

Is this play about us? No, it was all for good reason. I1 tried to drive home after a night of drinking, right? And he was like, hey, you can't do that. And I was like, I can do what I want. And he ripped me out of the car with all of his, like, jewelry still on and, like decked me and then dragged my body into the passenger seat. Drove me home. I woke up the next day and I was like, did you punch me in the face? He said, yeah. And I said, thanks and hung up the phone.

[Lizzy]

Saved your life.

[Colby]

I feel like there was some pent up shit going on. He could have just taken your keys. Yes. He's like, I threw you in the trunk for a good car. I pissed off. I came on you as somebody who.

[Chris]

Knows what I'm like when I'm drunk. No, he had to like tranquilize the killer.

[Lizzy]

It's like when a lifeguard saving a person at sea, they have to knock him out first before they can drive back to shore.

[Colby]

Right.

[Chris]

Wow, that was fun.

[Colby]

That sweet guy. Yeah.

[Chris]

We went out the next day, so it was good.

[Shane]

Well, a little check in with the scores. Everyone is on the board, but our two leaders are sitting over there. Right?

[Colby]

Look, we got to bring him down.

[Lizzy]

Should we get fist fight to see who wins?

[Shane]

Yes.

[Spencer]

I just gotta go with my gut.

[Shane]

All right? My partner put their sister's vibrating toothbrush in my butt during sex.

[Colby]

That's insane.

[Jared]

Only something that Chris or Colby would do.

[Spencer]

Okay, so well. Well, guys, guys, they have a sister.

[Shane]

No, no, the partner.

[Jared]

No, the partner sister. Oh, this.

[Colby]

If this isn't Chris.

[Shane]

I'm glad we didn't cover this one before.

[Chris]

This has to be Chris.

[Colby]

Has to be.

[Shane]

All right, everyone ready? Three, two, one, reveal.

[Colby]

Yes, there is. Thank God, because I did not. We all got it.

[Jared]

Can nobody appreciate?

[Chris]

I definitely doubled down you, Chris.

[Colby]

This is a press conference. We all have questions. Number one, when was this? I plead the no. This was, well, my first relationship. Okay? And I didn't know in the moment that that's what it Was. I assumed it was like a sex toy or something until after. And I was like, it was an unconsensual toothbrushing. Was not very tannico.

[Lizzy]

Was very tannico.

[Colby]

Not bristle.

[Shane]

Just to clarify.

[Chris]

So when did you find out it was the sisters. And did you look her in the eye after she was using it?

[Colby]

The next day.

[Chris]

That's what I'm saying.

[Colby]

No, I. I was like, we have to throw this away. We have to throw this.

[Chris]

So wait, she's like, where's my A nightmare?

[Colby]

Are you kidding me? Yes, that did happen.

[Chris]

I think the B in oral B just stands for butt.

[Spencer]

9 out of 10, Dennis recommends sticking it in your butt.

[Jared]

I've never gotten something stuck in my ass.

[Lizzy]

No, but you're the one who told me.

[Colby]

Oh.

[Jared]

The nurses at the ER were telling me in great detail about how often men come with their girlfriends with their girlfriend to have got stuff lost in their boyfriend's asses.

[Colby]

Oh, wow. Yeah. My cousin got a banana stuck in there. You can't just squish it out. Was it peeled?

[Jared]

I think.

[Colby]

I think it was not peeled. I think he was so aggressive that it, like, squished out. I. I believe is what happened.

[Lizzy]

I hate this.

[Shane]

Wait, so his ass peeled a banana?

[Colby]

Yeah, period. I think that's a trick, what you put on your butt.

[Jared]

I've never been like that.

[Colby]

Yeah, right.

[Jared]

I haven't. Are you kidding me? No, literally, I've never stuck an inanimate object in my asshole.

[Colby]

So the first thing you put in your butt was a dick? That's on the. Shane. Nothing. Help me, please.

[Jared]

No, thank you.

[Colby]

Yeah. We're not alone on this. No. Maybe it's a cancer thing.

[Chris]

Get out of your box, Colby. Oh, I was putting anything in this box.

[Colby]

Yes, period.

[Chris]

You got to be half.

[Jared]

So Spencer and Jared are quiet. What have you stuck in your butts?

[Shane]

I'm more stuck stuff. Like, I've like, stuff, you know?

[Jared]

I mean, straight guys have stuck stuff.

[Shane]

Yeah.

[Colby]

Right? Yeah.

[Shane]

All right, next one.

[Jared]

Right now, it's still a tie between Lizzie and I.

[Shane]

It is. You guys are tied with three. Shane and Jared at two, Colby and Chris with one.

[Jared]

Okay, I gotta win.

[Lizzy]

My money's on Colby.

[Chris]

We suck at this.

[Shane]

Okay, this is a interesting one. It's called in elementary school, I stood up and tried to accept an award I didn't win in front of the entire school.

[Chris]

Whoa, Me or Jared?

[Jared]

No, it's kind of a real.

[Colby]

That's not me me.

[Shane]

Yeah.

[Colby]

With all my social anxiety, you think I got up There and accepted an award.

[Jared]

Okay, so it's either Colby or Chris.

[Colby]

Or I'm also a cancer. I can never. It hasn't been Spencer yet. I could see Spencer thinking, that was funny. Like, you know, like, best woman alive. And he walked.

[Shane]

They give that out in elementary school. Best woman.

[Colby]

I don't know.

[Jared]

Would he really read a fourth one of Colby's?

[Lizzy]

He could.

[Shane]

There's more than four, I'll tell you that. All right, everyone have an answer for this one? Are you ready? 3, 2, 1, reveal.

[Jared]

I would never.

[Shane]

It was, in fact, me.

[Colby]

I win, I win, I win, I.

[Jared]

Win, I win, I win, I win, I win.

[Spencer]

I even made his name into, like, a face.

[Jared]

What's the prize?

[Colby]

There is no prize. What prizes? Spencer's going to tell his story.

[Shane]

Yeah, it's also. It's not. It's funny because it's not like, oh, that was a funny bit. It was. I genuinely. It was like, a traumatic experience. Like, I thought I was, like, so confident I had won. I forget what it was, but it was like, you know, it was like. Yeah, it was in front of. It was like, you know, the, like, assembly. And it was like, they're giving out the end of year. It's like, best attendance, blah, blah, blah. And it was one of those. And I was like. I stood up. I was like, I got this one. I said that out loud. They said some girl's name, and I'd already started to walk up. I was like. And everyone was laughing. I was just like, fuck, fuck, fuck. It was like. So I just remember the flip of being like, yeah, I got this. And I was gonna be, like, so cool and confident walking up on stage. And then it was like, so sorry Grace has won.

[Lizzy]

And I was like, oh, it's like Zoolander nightmare.

[Chris]

So what'd you do, double down?

[Spencer]

Did you challenge it?

[Jared]

How did you cope?

[Shane]

I should have Kanye Wested it. I should have. I should have gone up.

[Colby]

I'll let you have this one. I know Rylan thinks he won, but I think we should do one more.

[Shane]

What if. This one's worth five points.

[Jared]

But I already won.

[Lizzy]

No, not.

[Jared]

My husband's doing this in spite of me.

[Colby]

I'm loving Shane.

[Shane]

All right, I'm gonna do one that could. Could. That's a. A vague one. So anyway, you know what I mean.

[Colby]

Okay.

[Shane]

I got pants at school in fourth grade.

[Jared]

Don't look at mine, you freak.

[Lizzy]

I'm looking at you.

[Shane]

All right, everyone. Everyone have an answer?

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Shane]

All right. Three, two, one, reveal.

[Colby]

I think it's Jared.

[Shane]

We have a winner. It was me.

[Jared]

I had Jared. And then I really thought. I was like, you wouldn't let that happen. Happened to you.

[Spencer]

I felt like, oh, it happened.

[Colby]

Oh, my God, it happened.

[Jared]

I had his name, and I erased it.

[Colby]

That's what happened.

[Spencer]

There was a couple guys. I was in fourth grade. They were in sixth grade, you know, the older, cooler dudes. And for whatever reason, they said, like, something about my mom. And then I came back with. Well, that's why you were with her last night. Or one of these, like, horrible comebacks that made me look really bad.

[Lizzy]

Yeah.

[Spencer]

You know, and then one of their buddies just came behind me and pantsed me. I bet you got me.

[Colby]

Yeah.

[Lizzy]

Injury.

[Shane]

Wow.

[Spencer]

Yeah.

[Shane]

Do you want me to read through the ones Colby sent that that we didn't? Yeah, we'll do a lightning round. I used to go to Rodeo Drive just to get drunk off of free champagne they would give you if they thought you were shopping at luxury stores.

[Colby]

That's a cheap trick.

[Jared]

Yeah, that is a cheap trick.

[Colby]

That's a video idea.

[Shane]

I used to hook up with people from Craigslist. Missed connections. They're kind of exposing you.

[Jared]

That's a different level of darkness, though. Like, I would go for man seeking man. Not like I was your missed connection.

[Chris]

No, no, no, that's. I. Yeah, that's what it was. I'm from.

[Shane]

You know, I ate an entire box of Twinkies in one sitting, then proceeded to throw up. The entire box of Twinkies.

[Colby]

Throw up.

[Chris]

Yeah, they went in and came.

[Colby]

Right.

[Jared]

Yeah, a whole box. Can't sit down there.

[Chris]

I literally have not eaten a Twinkie since that day.

[Colby]

They were really good. Wow. Well, happy birthday.

[Shane]

Happy birthday.

[Jared]

28 years young.

[Colby]

Well, speaking of ways to make Colby's birthday even better, has it been good?

[Chris]

Oh, it's great.

[Colby]

Really.

[Chris]

And I'm spooked on whatever is coming.

[Colby]

We're gonna all put toothpastes in your bag, get the popcorn at the same time.

[Jared]

We have vibrating ones, so don't worry.

[Colby]

Well, when we come back, we're gonna be doing something very special. It's not just a normal conspiracy corner. Although it is. But on top of that, we might have Colby's conspiracy corner, because when I texted him and I said, hey, if you have any theories, bring them. And he sent me a list, and I was like, I don't even know where to start. Some of these are going to get this show taken down. And I was like, but it's your birthday. Let's do them, so sit tight. Get that toothbrush out of there. Don't go anywhere. We'll be back. See you in a second. Oh, my God. Oh, no. Guys, I feel it coming. We're about to do something in this office for the first time, and I'm nervous. I need to nail the furniture down to the floor. I need to protect my Garfield. Make sure he doesn't fall over. My shorty. My little whale tail. She's glass. We don't want to rumble her too much because, guys, it's about time to kick off. Oh, I got a note from the landlord. That's embarrassing. Imagine. Hi. You were screaming during your ad read. You did a big kick motion, shook the building. Also, can you stop unboxing labubus in the common area? Because every time you squeal like a little piggy, it annoys the other tenants. Yeah, I'm a pleasure. Kickoff gives you an affordable way to build real credit without the stress of expensive credit card debt. No credit check, no interest, just $5 a month. And it can really help you move your score up fast. All you gotta do is sign up. It just takes a couple minutes. And right away they start helping build up your credit. It works with autopay. So you set up the autopay, and while you're sleeping, your credit is building so easy, so fast and so helpful. They have over 1 million users and hundreds of thousands of positive reviews, and that makes them the number one credit builder on the App Store. All you gotta do is go to getkickoff.com grower. That's get K I K O ff.com grower. And you can get your first month for as little as $1. That's 80% off the normal price. Must sign up via getkickoff.com grower to activate offer. Offer applies to new kickoff customers. First month only. Subject to approval. Offer subject to change. Average first year credit score. Impact of plus 84 points. Vantage score 3.0 between January 2023 and January 2024. For kickoff credit account users who started with a score below 600, who paid on time, and who had no delinquencies or collections added to their credit profile during the period. Late payments may negatively impact your credit score. Individual results may vary. So thank you so much, Kickoff for sponsoring and yeah, I hope you guys enjoy the rest of the show. I think that was my last ad. Ready. So I'm going to leave. Oh, that's sad. I'm going to go enjoy the rest of the show by. Hey, welcome back. Okay, guys, strap in. I don't even Know where to start? Because we have so much planned, so much craziness, so much potentially getting us in trouble. So let's start with the boo boos. Okay. I got an email from Luck, and he or she said, hey, couch crew. I saw this crazy la booboo TikTok of a camera that was found in a Le Fufuu's eyes.

[Jared]

This is why you can't be buying lefoufuu.

[Colby]

You might want to investigate. So, yes, if you don't know a lefoufuu is a fake version of a leboo, and you can get them at, like, gas stations and stuff. Well, supposedly some people are putting cameras in them, which is terrifying. And here is a video of it. Ah, right there.

[Shane]

Yeah.

[Colby]

Oh, my God.

[Chris]

No way.

[Colby]

Oh, my God. Why.

[Jared]

Dissect her?

[Colby]

I. Okay, this freaks me out because we've done videos in the past about hidden cameras and how small they are now. How you can literally put them in your butt. How you can see.

[Jared]

These feel really good.

[Colby]

Oh, yeah, the zoom. No, it's crazy. And now, I mean, we've seen with the. What was it? The Barbie that we talked about a couple years ago where it was like, camera Barbie. So the lefoufu with the camera. I don't know, guys. Listen, I'm not set. I'm not trying to make Labubu stock rise. But what I will say is, if you're gonna get a labo, get a real Labubu. Good luck.

[Chris]

No cameras, they give the same energy as, like, Furbies.

[Colby]

Yes.

[Chris]

And, like, those were scary, crazy energy.

[Colby]

And supposedly banned from the White House because Furbies have a recording device in them because they're listening and they're learning. They were the original AI and they're listening and learning how to talk to you and your kids. So they had to take them out of the White House because they were recording information.

[Spencer]

I also wouldn't be surprised if the same people who manufacture the real boo Boos are making lefufus.

[Shane]

Wow.

[Jared]

It's a good.

[Spencer]

Have you heard of Bathing Apex? Yes, the clothing company. Yeah, the guy. He got his whole buzz by only making, like, 200 T shirts a week and then realized, I'm making enough money. So he opened another factory in China and made fake bathing ape stop. And made $300 million a year off of it.

[Lizzy]

Brilliant.

[Colby]

Wait, so is that. I heard, like, maybe six months ago, there was an article, and it was, like, one of the big brands. Like, not Balenciaga, Prada. It was one of those big brands, and they. Somebody that worked in the factory, like, put out a TikTok or something, being like, hey, these purses, they only cost us a dollar to make and they sell them for 50 grand. Or what was that?

[Chris]

Well, so, okay, so once, like, the tariffs really started to, like, skyrocket and spike, like, everybody was not getting product. They couldn't get it into America. Like, everyone was freaking out. And it's like, well, hey, some of the stuff that people were actually buying on dhgate that are fake were the same exact bag. And it was all based on just, we couldn't get rid of this product. Nobody was able to buy it. We're just gonna put it out to get our money back. And so, like, some of the stuff that people do buy that are fakes or the foo foos, you know, are actually just the same manufacturer, but with a tiny camera. Yeah, but like, with the tiny camera for data.

[Jared]

Something to stick in your ass.

[Chris]

Yeah, but a lot of it really just stems from. From, like, it's a money grab. Like, most things that most people don't realize, like a normal graphic T shirt, fully landed printed, and everything is only about $4.

[Colby]

Wow.

[Chris]

Yeah. So, like, that's the issue is when I spent the last five years working in fashion, I hate shopping now because I know not only what the material is, I know the cost of it, I know what it actually made to produce. And now I'm sitting there going, you're a scam artist.

[Colby]

Wait, this is a fun idea we should do for a future podcast where we go out into the world with you and go to all the luxury stores and you tell us how much things probably cost to me and how much they're selling them for.

[Shane]

And then we get drunk on the ship.

[Chris]

And then we get drunk on the ship.

[Colby]

Wasted. Yes.

[Jared]

I mean, luxury is hype. I mean, it's how. It's their marketing. It's how. How many people have the demand that they can create.

[Chris]

Well, here's the other thing, too, is luxury brands prey on a class system, right? So, like, if you ever notice, Louis Vuitton sells two different mixtures of things. You have the $600 scarfs that any average family can afford or buy or.

[Jared]

Do or save up for, just so.

[Chris]

That it becomes this moment of, like, well, I have Louis. Then they also sell, like, the made to order $28,000 jacket that, like, you only see celebrities in, but people are buying it to give themselves, like, mentally a higher level of class system when it's literally just a scarf.

[Colby]

Wow. Yeah, so true. Well, speaking of Brands doing really shady things. Please don't sue me. But we have a update. Okay, so, yes, as we're aware, we might have allegedly done some experiments where we allegedly bought things from, fucked with them, returned them, and they put them back on the shelves. Allegedly. Well, allegedly. They're still letting that happen. Here is a TikTok that was sent to a spike. Hey, Lynn. And I'm just going to let you watch this for yourself. Why is this used iPhone case being sold for $7.99?

[Shane]

It's fully just used.

[Colby]

I.

[Jared]

Okay, that is actually wild that that would go back on shelf.

[Colby]

Right.

[Spencer]

I just like the fact that they have a security device on it to make sure nobody steals a used phone case.

[Colby]

Listen, after our video about their makeup, nothing changed. Which, you know, kind of iconic for them. They're like.

[Jared]

I was like, our business model is so strong. Our demographic loves us so much.

[Colby]

But now it's like, I didn't know it was to that extent. That's like someone's trash.

[Shane]

That's like too much for that. $8 for that is ridiculous.

[Colby]

Well, there's more. So this was an email from Cass and she said, hey, been a fan since I was younger. Thank you. I took this picture earlier when I was walking around and Home Goods in my hometown. So she was at Home Goods and she saw something a little interesting. So, as you guys know, we've been speculating that Home Goods might allegedly sell AI generated art. And then they put a little thing on the art that says, like, here's the artist. And it has a picture and a bio and all that. It's really cute. But these two pictures are very similar of these penguins jumping in a tub. And only the one on the right has the artist bio and the one on the left. So I don't do with that what you want. Like, is that woman AI? Like, is this whole operation fake? Or did they, like, take the original, like, make other versions of it?

[Lizzy]

Or is that the woman who told the AI what to do?

[Jared]

Does she really get to be the.

[Chris]

She's an A prompter, a director.

[Jared]

Shane did order something on Etsy once, and then he was like, this is AI. And then when he confronted them, he was. They were like, well, yeah, I'm an AI artist. I was like, oh, my gosh.

[Colby]

Some of the things that specifically say digital artists. And that makes me feel like, I don't know.

[Jared]

Yeah, she's. She's good at inputting descriptions.

[Colby]

Right.

[Chris]

It's interesting, though, it's bigger than. Because it's also Michaels is getting called out for selling it. And Michaels sells art supplies for artists and they're getting called out now for no longer supporting the artists.

[Spencer]

Michaels is on a full blown takeover of all stores. They're the same ones that sell balloons now they're after Dollar Tree.

[Colby]

Yes. Okay, this was interesting. So this goes across the globe, guys. So Home Goods isn't in Canada. Or maybe it is. Well, we got an email from Maya and she said they have their own version of home good goods called Homesense. And she said, hey, so I'm from Ontario, I'm 19. And I was at Homesense, which I don't know if you know what that is, but it's kind of like home goods. I was in the pet section looking for pet bowls and I saw this cat bowl from dollarama, which is a Canadian dollar store. She said There was a HomeSense sticker on top of the Dollarama sticker. And I was completely shook. This shit is going global, guys. And here is a picture of this pet bowl and yeah, there's literally a Dollarama sticker. And then they just put no on top of it that an employee would.

[Jared]

Put just a sticker. Blatantly.

[Chris]

They don't even try. Yeah, they didn't try at all.

[Jared]

They're just like, yeah, we'll sell it.

[Colby]

How does this happen? I don't know. It's never going to stop. And this is when it gets crazier. Okay, so I got so many messages about this and I'm like, this can't be real. There's no way this is real.

[Shane]

And?

[Colby]

And I text Spencer about it. He looks it up, he's like, this is fucking real. What are we gonna do? Walmart is currently selling fake merch of mine.

[Jared]

Oh, that's right.

[Colby]

For the. No way. And not just fake merch of mine. Fake merch of Hungry Boy.

[Jared]

No way.

[Colby]

What the fuck? Those fuckers. Isn't that insane? Are you serious? Yeah. So fake merch, right? Which is kind of crazy. They're also selling whatever the fuck this is. This is a book called Shane Dawson, actor and author with more than 4 billion views. But the best part is it says pre owned and then they're also selling cardboard cutouts. Is that real? We need to blow George.

[Shane]

One $90.

[Colby]

That's a standing stand in front of you for $90.

[Jared]

You left out my merch.

[Colby]

But are they selling your merch?

[Jared]

Yes.

[Colby]

Where?

[Chris]

Well, I have an answer for you. Walmart.com is an open sale seller, so it's the same with Amazon. Like you can make An Amazon account and sell a product. Walmart.com is running the same thing. So any, any of us could go in and literally upload a product as long as we have an account with Walmart.

[Colby]

Hold on.

[Shane]

So one of these, one of you fuckers is doing.

[Colby]

Yeah, so you're saying on Shark Tank when one of the like people have like a shitty product and they're like, well, instead it's available on Walmart.com and all the sharks are like, whoa. It's just this shit.

[Chris]

Well, I mean, they might have a their own deal with Walmart, but Walmart's actual website is an open like selling.

[Colby]

I did not know that. I didn't either. Should we buy a bunch of this Walmart emergency?

[Chris]

Can you buy the book that makes it look like you're about to sell cult classics?

[Colby]

I kind of want to buy that book.

[Chris]

It's pre owned.

[Colby]

Wow, that's great. Who owned it? Wow. It says there's only one left. Hurry. Oh no.

[Chris]

Okay.

[Shane]

I might just be one in existence.

[Colby]

God, that's crazy. Okay, this next one is something that we've talked about a lot in the past. I mean, God, I would say the whole Simpsons predicting the future thing is one of like the earliest conspiracy theories. I feel like since I was a kid I've been hearing about the Simpsons predicting things that happen. Just to refresh your memory if you don't know about this. So obviously we know the Simpsons predicted Donald Trump becoming president. There's some big events that might have been predicted by the Simpsons. The Simpsons predicted Apple Vision Pro, which.

[Jared]

Honestly, that didn't work out.

[Colby]

Yeah, that one didn't really work out for Apple, but yeah, Simpsons predicted that. They predicted Siegfried and Roy. They predicted Roy being eaten by a tiger, which is terrible. They predicted Fox getting sold to Disney. Homer almost predicted the God particle.

[Shane]

Yeah, this one is crazy. Some scientists, this is before they discovered the God particle and they saw the equation and he was like, he got it almost right.

[Colby]

That's crazy.

[Chris]

What?

[Shane]

So they almost like got it right, which is even crazy year.

[Colby]

That's crazy. They predicted the three eyed fish that actually was found at a nuclear power plant in Argentina. That's insane. That's real.

[Shane]

Yeah, it's a real.

[Colby]

Oh my God. Ew. Okay, that's crazy. Also predicting the Diddy party, the white parties is wild. I don't know what episode that is, but that's insane. Okay, so yes, they have predicted many, many, many things that have come true. And the writers have come out and talked about it and been like, Listen, like, we're not trying to predict the things. It just keeps happening, and it's crazy. So we're just gonna keep doing what we do, and hopefully we're not manifesting things. Well, they might have. Here is their latest prediction. And this was years ago that this actually came out. It's here. Maggie's first Pazuzu. Tonight we have a cocktail party, and we came early. Don't worry, Maggie. While mommy and daddy carouse downstairs, you'll.

[Jared]

Be here in the dark with Pazuzu.

[Colby]

Sweet dreams, Maggie.

[Jared]

Don't let the beetle pups bite.

[Colby]

That's right. That is a tiny demon toy named Pazuzu that looks just like a fucking Labubu. And that is the demon that everybody's saying Labubu is made after. Allegedly. And the Simpsons put this out. It controls your mind. It makes you do evil things. And this came out years ago. And now the Labubu is taking over. I'm just saying.

[Lizzy]

And people are getting in violent fights.

[Colby]

Over the laboon, like, to a point where it's insane. Like, I. When we talked about it in the last episode, I'm not gonna lie, I didn't know that much about it. Now that I'm fully infiltrated into the world, people are losing their minds. Yeah. You kindly gifted me one that. I threw one at you. I said, get it out of my house. That I posted on my Instagram story. And I've never gotten more, like, responses ever, for anything I've ever posted. And, like, passionate responses that just went on for forever and messages and, like, just, like, it. It was the most insane. Like, even from, like, people I know, like, people's moms and stuff. Like, just, like, so many responses.

[Jared]

And I was like, over this, My mom's like, are they gonna send me one?

[Colby]

Really?

[Jared]

No, I'm kidding.

[Colby]

That's funny. Yeah. So I don't know what the Simpsons are predicting. That episode did not turn out great. The demon entered Maggie's body and tried to kill people. So I don't think that turned out well. I don't know how the Labubu craze is turning out. Colby, you're very up to, you know, fashion trends, what's going on, the next generation, all those things. How long do you give Labubus?

[Chris]

Yesterday. Whoa. My. My biggest thing is this is. They have their moment. They're gone. They have their moment. They're gone. And we will see this over and over and over and over again. I don't get it. I never will. You're never going to catch Me with a little boo boo on my strap. Like, I can't. I can't do it.

[Colby]

Right.

[Chris]

It's just. It's in and it's out, and they're. I think it's a waste of money.

[Colby]

Wow. Yeah.

[Chris]

I'm a hater. And I'm okay having the Internet now. I hate it.

[Colby]

Just.

[Lizzy]

What do you do?

[Colby]

What do you do?

[Shane]

R's a hater, too.

[Chris]

I don't get it.

[Jared]

That's why I'm giving mine away.

[Lizzy]

Chris, how many?

[Jared]

I gave you a demon.

[Lizzy]

How many do you have?

[Chris]

Of.

[Colby]

We have so many.

[Jared]

Are you serious? I'm kidding. You knew it was a demon.

[Colby]

I will say. Listen, I have one on Mickey's. It was a joke.

[Chris]

I think they have a month. I give them 30 days.

[Jared]

Yeah. By the time this episode's out, it's over.

[Chris]

And if it's not good for y'.

[Colby]

All. Yeah.

[Shane]

Shout out to you.

[Chris]

Yeah. We missed out on the best investment of our lives.

[Colby]

Okay, Colby, take us into Colby's conspiracy corner. What do you got cooked up for us today?

[Chris]

Okay, this is one I've been thinking about for a while. There's no proof for it, but here's. Here's the big story. When I was a kid, this was right in the time period where it was like, real life footage of mermaids are coming out, ghosts are caught. Like, the. The big boom of, like, even haunted movies are happening. Crop circles are taking over the nation. And it stops. It just. Everyone stops talking about it. We move on in society. Everything happens, right? And I sat there and I was like, why would we just stop talking about it? Like, I swear we saw the Chupacabra every other week, and now all of a sudden, like, nothing again. Well, it wasn't until now that it started to click for me as we enter back into another recession.

[Jared]

Oh, you're scaring me.

[Chris]

Economic. So as we're getting closer and closer to the downfall of our economy, what happens? Aliens start to pop up in Miami. Everything starts collide up in the. The sky. Bigfoots and giants are. We're starting to see them on Tik Tok in real clips. And I've been thinking about the fact that I believe that it's entertainment value added to skew our view away from what's actually happening in the world.

[Colby]

It's a distraction.

[Chris]

It's fully a distraction, but it's not the first time that we've seen a lot of these things happen. Like, weird other side note, but, like, Project Blue Beam, if any of you know what that is where it's like, hey, this. We're going to falsify a couple of things to skew your view. Like we've seen it happen over and over and over again in history, but the entertainment value always happens around an economic downfall or like explosion of our banking systems. And so we're seeing it again and the world is falling apart and now aliens are back and mermaids are back, which not just any mermaids. Have you guys, have you seen the clip of like the mermaid dinner parties.

[Colby]

That people are starting to talk about? So we. Okay, so maybe a few months ago we talked about it in conspiracy corner. We showed clips of these viral clips of people talking about these rich people dinner parties where they would eat mermaids. And we showed the clips and Ryland just could not even pretend to be interested and he was making fun of all of them. So we cut it out of the episode. But really? Yes. But I did think it was very interesting. So thankfully Colby is here.

[Chris]

Here's the thing though. It's not even about just the fact of like mermaids are being talked about again, the length that people are going to go to tell this story. Right. Cuz if you watch the clips, it's a. I heard from somewhere. It's not the person that attended the party. It's not whatever. It's just someone adding in this extra piece of information in my head. This person who brings up this mermaid story again is just like I'm going to throw cog in the machine because something else is about to happen.

[Jared]

Right.

[Chris]

We're about to hit another oh my God issue in our economy. Something else is about to happen. Here's a clip of a giant that we see in the mountain. Something else is about to happen. Here's all of a sudden, you know, every single time that something's about to hit, I'm gonna side sweep you in a different direction to be like, here's the mythical land of whatever.

[Jared]

Send Katy Perry to space.

[Colby]

Right.

[Chris]

Have her kiss the ground.

[Colby]

Yeah.

[Chris]

She spent more time on camera than she did looking outside. But Johnny.

[Spencer]

Johnny Depp and Amber Heard's trial, it.

[Chris]

Always happens like as.

[Spencer]

Just saying, there's other trials going on.

[Chris]

Yeah.

[Colby]

Okay. Can I just say this is really freaking me out. I don't want to get too deep into this because like I saw a video and I. It really, really scared me. And it was something a lot of you guys were sending in and I didn't even want to show it just because it scared me so bad. But there is a theory going around that something really bad is coming and it's going to happen and it's really, really scary. And I don't want to think, especially now we have kids, I don't want to think like that. But what you're saying right now is actually freaking me out because I do feel like the distractions have been extra high. I mean, I'm talking like every day there's a new crazy thing or pop culture thing or. And this. It's always been like that, but never this extent. And I'm like, what are they distracting us from?

[Chris]

But we might not ever know until it's like, ah, in your face. Right, right. And then it just makes me think back of in that time period of growing up, like early 2000s, what did we really miss? Seeing what was really going on. And it's when they released all of the documents where they were like, hey, by the way, the US Government knows we have aliens. They also, in the same time period, hid that under a bunch of other mutual media coverage. Like they were telling us, we're gonna release it, we're gonna release it, we're gonna release it. And they waited for a giant, like, moment to happen. And then they were like, here you go, it's on the website.

[Colby]

Right?

[Lizzy]

It's interesting that you brought up the, you know, similarities between the early 2000s and now, because as a millennial, my feed has been all a bunch of memes of people being like, this seems familiar. Like, this seems a little fishy. Like, oh, we're looking for weapons of mass destruction again. Okay. But like, as a 30 something year old, like, I remember 9, 11. I remember the huge economic crash of 2008 that left like my family devastated. I remember going to college for no reason because the second we got out of it, there were no jobs.

[Colby]

Wow.

[Shane]

Well, also, like, AI talking about like, distraction and like, you know, I feel like AI is like the next, like.

[Chris]

Yeah, step of that.

[Shane]

It's like, now they need to question everything, like, what's real at all anywhere.

[Lizzy]

But nobody questions it, including myself. Like, one thing that drives me a little crazy is I'll see these like, cool historical facts or like copy paste from history. And one of the ones that really got me, I sent it to Spencer. It's the similarities in Lincoln and Kennedy's assassination. And there's like 20 points on this thing, but when you actually go in and fact check them, some of them are lies.

[Shane]

Hey, can I use this is crazy. Let's do it on the podcast. And then like, oh, never mind. It's all. It's all wrong.

[Lizzy]

It's all lies. But it's like, when I saw it originally, I was like, that is crazy. This is a simulation. But it's like, why am I buying something that's made by a stranger on Instagram?

[Shane]

Yeah.

[Colby]

So where does this lead? Like, what's next?

[Spencer]

They just want everybody really stupid.

[Colby]

Yeah.

[Spencer]

I mean, I don't think it's easier. It's easier to lead dumb sheep into slaughter than it is to, like, you know, highly intellectual human beings that can see things for what they are.

[Colby]

This is crazy, because I was just talking to Spence about this yesterday. There's all these studies now saying that ChatGPT is making us stupider.

[Spencer]

This is true.

[Colby]

It really is. Honestly, Even me, like, not with CHAT GPT, but with Google. Like, I will Google something and it gives me the AI, you know, explanation. I'm like, oh, there it is. I don't even question literally every tiny thing in my life that I used to, like, research or look into or whatever. I just got the answer. I'm done. Like, no brain power needed. And then you were saying. I don't know if you want to say this on camera.

[Chris]

Yeah. Well, I work for an AI company, and it's interesting that everyone has this. Like, ChatGPT is scary. ChatGPT is scary. I've seen systems that make ChatGPT look like the kid friendly program. Like, this thing is getting smarter and smarter and bigger and bigger.

[Colby]

Oh, my God.

[Chris]

And what's crazy is if you're using it for, you know, the right reasons, sure. But, like, ChatGPT is nothing to fear because it's actually kind of fairly dumb. But some of these programs are. I can't even begin to comprehend or explain to you what it is that they're doing or. Or building.

[Colby]

Oh, my God.

[Chris]

The. The thing that's interesting is not only are we building systems to create AI, we are now also pushing as fast as possible to build systems to understand that it is AI. Because now it's like there are so many different, like, news articles that are coming out, and I love the people that are actually using it for good where they started out and be like, by the way, I'm not real. And it's like, able to teach the older generation, hey, stop trusting. Because they were the ones who the whole time were like, don't trust everything you see on the Internet. And now it's our job to be like, hey, by the way, please stop.

[Colby]

It's not real.

[Lizzy]

Trust nothing, ever, including a voice that sounds like Me in, in peril. Cut to me needing help.

[Colby]

It's really neat.

[Chris]

I'll call you for money, but it's cuz I'm broke. I didn't get kidnapped. Well, that was the corner.

[Colby]

Happy birthday.

[Chris]

The world's ending.

[Colby]

Happy birthday, Colby. We're getting weaker, dumber, easier to control.

[Chris]

Yeah, I'm here to be hot, not be smart.

[Colby]

You both girl. Well, listen, that was one of the scariest conspiracy corners I think we've ever had. Colby, you really brought that. Thank you for scaring the out of us on your birthday. You really good job.

[Jared]

Sponsors doing it with all his fingers.

[Spencer]

And now cake time.

[Colby]

Well, speaking of speaking of things that could end the world, I think it's time for a recap. Light, camera, action Ryland recap is about to happen.

[Jared]

On today's episode of the Shane Dawson podcast, we have special guest and birthday.

[Chris]

Boy Colby.

[Jared]

Who has terrified us for the end of the world.

[Colby]

Yeah. Wow.

[Lizzy]

But I feel fine.

[Colby]

Jared got a boner. Karate.

[Spencer]

I cracked the fatty.

[Jared]

Not the only one to crack the fat in public. Him like me cracked the fat at karate.

[Shane]

Wait, like you?

[Jared]

Well, I crack the fat everywhere, okay? I'm always cracking the fat.

[Colby]

Always.

[Lizzy]

He's a fatty cracker.

[Jared]

Stanley update. Just when you thought it couldn't get any worse, my husband Shane found a way to make his Stanley cups more obnoxious and more hateable. Shane, what do you have for us today?

[Colby]

Hey, guys. So I don't know if you guys, but I have multiple modes and currently this one is my favorite.

[Jared]

Wow, that's so cool. How long does the battery last?

[Colby]

Well, it just died.

[Jared]

Anybody else have a product?

[Shane]

La Booboo Spies.

[Jared]

What are the fake ones called?

[Shane]

Lefufu.

[Jared]

Girls, watch out for lefufu's everywhere. Not only are you getting a ripoff to the real demons that could be existing in your house, but they also come with cameras that will not only spy on you, but you put him up your ass.

[Colby]

Oh, oh, oh, wait, who had a toothbrush in their ass?

[Spencer]

Chris.

[Colby]

Who did that? So weird.

[Jared]

Ever look at your electric toothbrush and think, what could I do with that? Well, Chris and his boyfriend found just the solution. Turn it around and stick it up your ass. If you're Lizzy, you go brush first.

[Spencer]

That could be like a new term getting Kristen. Yeah.

[Colby]

Wait, first of all, your co host Lizzie hasn't said anything. But second of all, your other co host Sally is being real quiet over there. No Sally's nervous at all.

[Lizzy]

Bring her in. Bring her in.

[Colby]

Sally, I'm so Nervous.

[Lizzy]

You just take the head off.

[Colby]

He does that.

[Lizzy]

It's so disturbing that he just ripped the head off.

[Colby]

Lizzy, what's going on with the baby down here? Hi, Sally.

[Shane]

Sully has no context for what this is.

[Jared]

Terrified. Oh, me here again. Are people trying to touch the bump this time?

[Lizzy]

Yes. I recently had a person be like, can I touch Sloppy. And I didn't know what to say.

[Chris]

So I just said yes.

[Lizzy]

But truthfully, I can't really even hug.

[Colby]

The Simpsons are predicting everything. Everything.

[Lizzy]

They predict everything.

[Jared]

Such as Lizzie.

[Colby]

What did they predict?

[Lizzy]

They predicted three eyed fishes. They predicted Trump being elected to office.

[Colby]

Cool.

[Lizzy]

AI and LeFoufoos.

[Colby]

Oh. Oh, we love lesbians. Lesbians are so cool.

[Shane]

Oh, you are Sally.

[Spencer]

Walmart selling fake. Oh, you gotta put them on Sally.

[Jared]

I gotta take this one. Walmart is selling fake Shane Dawson merch. Ever needed a Shane Dawson cardboard cutout? You can find it now on Walmart.com online. Colby.

[Spencer]

Round two. We're going back for record reconnaissance.

[Lizzy]

Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, we're coming for you. And I'm gonna spitting it this time.

[Colby]

It doesn't work if you're not holding.

[Lizzy]

S. Yeah, you gotta hold her.

[Colby]

Now you look cool. Now it makes sense. I'm working on not moving my lips better.

[Shane]

What? What?

[Lizzy]

He's working on not moving his lips better.

[Jared]

Thank you, Lizzy.

[Colby]

These four words, you, you, Spencer, you find freak spins are some crazy likes. Okay, that's it for today's episode of the Shadows and podcast.

[Jared]

Yeah, Sally, where do you think they could get merch if they're excited about.

[Colby]

Merchandisemerch.Com and everyone's links are in the description section below. Happy birthday, Kobe. Happy birthday, Colby. Yay. Wow.

[Chris]

You thought the conspiracy was nightmare. Fuel would keep me up because I have no idea what just happened.

[Lizzy]

You weren't even a little bit impressed?

[Jared]

He was giving me the same blank stares you all did the first round.

[Lizzy]

We were all in awe.

[Colby]

I love Sally.

[Jared]

I know. You are my only fan.

[Lizzy]

Yeah, well, I loved it.

[Spencer]

I just think without Sally's hair matching yours exactly. It's a little like if we had a Rylan wig on top of Sally. Oh, my God, that'd be epic. Okay, Just saying.

[Colby]

We need a beard.

[Jared]

We'll work on.

[Colby]

I'll work on that.

[Jared]

And if you want to watch more behind the scenes videos, us moving into the office, the that we will finally officially be in next episode. You can catch all of that on Shane's Patreon. It is so much fun there. We've been going live, I would say too much.

[Shane]

Who is in the Patreon?

[Chris]

Yes, I am in that chat.

[Colby]

Really? Colby is the king of the chat. All the people in the chat, they all know you. They're all the Colby's.

[Chris]

Here's what's crazy. This chat has a life of its own. I am married. I have 800 kids. It's so much fun. The people are so nice and lunatics. But if you want to see more of me, join the Patreon.

[Colby]

Wow, dude, good.

[Chris]

Join that chat.

[Jared]

The chat room's very fun. You get. You get an extra bonus podcast every week that this podcast isn't on. And then bonus fun vlogs throughout the month as well.

[Colby]

You're better at this than I am. Thank you. I'll let you guys go. Hopefully you enjoy whatever the the hell this was. Birthday edition. It was so much fun. Thank you for spending your birthday with us.

[Chris]

Thanks for having me.

[Colby]

And yeah, you know what? It got really scary in the end, but Sally brought some light to it and I feel okay.

[Jared]

And if you want to catch Cat Calby, if you want to catch Colby, he'll be outside of Club High Rise.

[Chris]

High Light Room, and Club Chubby Light Room.

[Colby]

Yeah. And if he's too drunk, punch him in the face.

[Chris]

Punch him in the face.

[Colby]

Yeah. All right. See you guys next time. Bye.

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