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Shane Dawson
Hablas espanol. Spritz du jom du noch. If you've heard that sound from Babbel before, I bet you do. Babbel is the science backed language learning app that actually works with quick 10 minute lessons. Handcrafted by over 200 language experts. Babbel gets you on your way to speaking a new language in just a few weeks with over 16 million subscriptions sold and a 20 day money back guarantee. Just start speaking another language with Babbel right now. Up to 55% off your Babbel subscription. @babbel.com Spotify podcast spelled B a B-B-E-L.com Spotify podcast rules and restrictions may apply. Everybody was talking about this and it's like, okay, obviously it's not real. It's kind of, you know, funny, whatever. Then I started thinking, I wonder if things from Black Mirror have come true. So then I started looking into it and oh my God, so many things from this show have now happened.
Ryland Adams
Really?
Shane Dawson
And are things that people don't even question. So let me show you some examples of things that Black Mirror has truly predicted about our future. Hey, welcome back to whatever the hell this is. Sausage party edition. Woo. Let him slap. Let em slap. Let's helicopter baby.
Chris
Round of applause.
Jared
Is this the type of Shane's likes segment that we would have?
Shane Dawson
Well, you know what's funny? So me and Spencer were trying to figure out a way to spice up the Spencer's likes segment. And I was like, you know what would be fun? If we do Spencer's likes and we look at all his sick, twisted likes and then I say, guess what guys, the next one one is going to be from one of us. Oh, we have to guess who liked this. So I was looking through on Instagram's new feature where you can see what your friends are liking. Because last time we talked about this I was like, Chris, you know, everybody can see your likes. And you know, all I see is a bunch of, you know, bellies. And you were just like, oh my God, I need to now that I know my likes are public, it's gonna change. And it did because I was going through trying to find all your guys likes.
Jared
Cute animals.
Shane Dawson
Yes.
Jared
I was like, I need to find damage.
Shane Dawson
I need to damage a big belly twerking and I need to find it now looking and I'm just getting Little Otter. Little Otter.
Ryland Adams
I literally just like the belly first off.
Shane Dawson
Little Pony, Little Otter. And I was just like, where are the bellies? And Jared, you're very Stingy with your legs.
Chris
I really have to feel connected to a post in order to like it.
Shane Dawson
Right.
Jared
I'm a hard like, too.
Shane Dawson
I think I've liked nothing.
Jared
Nothing outside of. Outside of somebody I know in real life. I think I've liked maybe two things in the last six months.
Spencer
He even said that when he was like. He's like this, right? I not like anything.
Jared
I don't. No, it's very rare. I think the only one I liked, I don't even really remember.
Shane Dawson
Sorry. I don't mention the air coming out of my teeth. Oh, I've been very cool. I've been water picking, and I don't know if it's, like, just throwing out all the plaque or whatever's happening, but, like, there's so much air flying out of my teeth, I can.
Chris
Dude, air picks will do. Water picks will do that.
Shane Dawson
Speaking of teeth, before the show, we were talking about Rylan's teeth, which, by the way, are very clean. Very clean. You brush it 20 times a day, at least twice.
Jared
I floss twice a day, and I mouthwash at least once a day.
Shane Dawson
The reason I brought this up was because we were talking about your teeth, and then you got mad at me for having braces. And then I was like, oh, my God, did everybody in this room have braces? And you're the only one that didn't have braces.
Jared
I was mad at you. I didn't have them.
Shane Dawson
Oh. But then I started thinking, I'm just.
Jared
Saying, all of you guys have straight chompers, and I'm a little unique and individualized. You are like every other girl on Instagram with teeth too big for my mouth.
Shane Dawson
You did say, though, you were like, I love my crooked teeth. Which, by the way, listen, I give myself credit for this because you wanted to get veneers. When I first met you, I was like, no, no, no. I love your teeth.
Jared
Yes. You were like, they're identifiable. They are something that make you stand out. Because I had met with a, like, big talent agent trying to do what I wanted to do at the time, which was hosting, and they were like, I think you have a lot of potential, but we've got to fix those teeth.
Ryland Adams
So mean.
Shane Dawson
So mean. Also, then that got me thinking, because when you said that, I called you crooked, and then I was, you know, just like, as a joke.
Jared
Okay. Flashbacks to my trauma for never having braces, though.
Ryland Adams
Your teeth are so much nicer than mine were pre br.
Shane Dawson
Yeah, they're really good. Oh, mine were like this.
Spencer
Yes.
Ryland Adams
I could put Entire pretzels through my teeth. Like, it was insane.
Shane Dawson
I'd like to see that. No, the reason I brought it up was because I called you crooked. We all laugh. And then I was like, oh, my God, that sounds like a gay slur. Crooked. Is it? And then I was like, is it.
Spencer
Because you're not straight?
Shane Dawson
Because you're not straight. You're crooked.
Ryland Adams
Bent used to be a gay slur.
Shane Dawson
Yeah, get bent. That's what that meant.
Jared
That kind of seems like a compliment.
Chris
That just meant, like, bend over. Which I guess. Yeah, that makes sense.
Shane Dawson
Seems worse. Then I started thinking, like, ooh, fun pride is coming up. Should we think of fun new games? But, like, one that are fun that we can take back. And Spencer's allowed to say, I don't.
Chris
Know what would be a good one.
Shane Dawson
Okay. Ooh, this is fun. Okay, so crooked. That's new and fun and fresh. What was the one? I came up with a chicken pudding pusher. And I was so. I was like, oh, my God. Clap on the back. But then Spencer looked it up and it's been taken.
Ryland Adams
Pudding pusher.
Jared
It's already been called for.
Chris
It is kind of a evolution Fudge packing.
Shane Dawson
Yeah, it's a take on it. I've heard that one.
Ryland Adams
I haven't heard.
Shane Dawson
It's the reboot. I got butt cave.
Spencer
Buc.
Shane Dawson
Sperm shitter. Pretty harsh.
Chris
Dude, that's harsh.
Spencer
Come crapper.
Jared
Come crapper.
Ryland Adams
I think I gotta go.
Jared
I'm actually offended.
Spencer
That's good, that's good, that's good, that's good.
Jared
Let's just end the segment by Spencer.
Shane Dawson
Screaming, no, no, no.
Jared
Come crapper is gonna forever haunt me. Thank you, Spencer.
Shane Dawson
Speaking of cum crapping, Spencer told me that he had a really good story to kind of go with Jared's story from a couple episodes ago. Jared, let's take a walk down memory lane. Jared, do you remember when you shit yourself at Target?
Chris
I haven't stopped thinking about it since.
Shane Dawson
Me neither.
Ryland Adams
My mom even brought it up to me and I was like, you told me you aren't watching these anymore, so I knew that she was.
Chris
And you know I love your mom.
Spencer
Well, guess what? I'm joining the club, folks.
Ryland Adams
Dude, you number three.
Chris
Welcome. Welcome home, bro. Welcome home.
Shane Dawson
You yourself.
Jared
He's like, at your house.
Spencer
Actually, no, no, no. I was on the public street, thank you very much.
Chris
Korean spa.
Spencer
No, I. So I went home. I had these like salmon from Trader Joe's. I don't know if you guys know this. Like, they like roll it up and.
Ryland Adams
I was like, with the cheese and the stuff.
Jared
I was like, oh, that looks.
Spencer
Well, I kicked it. And I was like, this tastes disgusting.
Shane Dawson
I.
Spencer
Like, I was in my room. I was like, never or never? Get this. This tastes awful. And then I was like, all right, I'm going to go for a walk. And then, like, you know when you were like. I was, like, pretty far from my house, and I just. On a walk, just, like, headphones and kind of zoning out. And then, you know that suddenly you get the sweat and you're like, oh, no. Oh, no, it's happening. And it was like midnight in, like, a residential neighborhood.
Jared
It was like, I could have gone walking.
Shane Dawson
You were eating Trader Joe's salmon at midnight.
Ryland Adams
Everyone's hard.
Spencer
I did something wrong at every step.
Jared
I'm so fascinated. Spencer, I need a live cam. Let's put him on Big Brother.
Shane Dawson
Yes. Oh, my God. There's casting. Oh, my God.
Jared
Can we please get him on Big Brother?
Shane Dawson
Yes. We'll talk about it later.
Spencer
Okay. I've had practice.
Shane Dawson
Okay. Keep going.
Spencer
Yeah. I mean, there's not much else to it, but then it was just like. It was one of those walk where you're just like the clinch walk. But it was so. I was, like, so far from my house. I was so sweaty, and it was just. It was a disaster. It was. I had to throw a lot of clothes away.
Shane Dawson
Really? You actually. Yourself.
Chris
I know.
Spencer
And I was as.
Shane Dawson
I. I. Well, what.
Chris
What was the moment of impact like?
Spencer
It was.
Chris
I was so far from your house.
Spencer
I was. I could see my building. And then I think my body was just like. Sorry. Like the bad fist. Just. Just.
Shane Dawson
Wow.
Spencer
It just. And then it wasn't. It was like. It was. I didn't do it, but I almost considered just walking around into traffic. That, too. That, too. But I was like. A lot of people in my building are, like, old, like, ladies who, like, have apartments in my building.
Chris
I understand.
Spencer
I was considering just going to the dumpster, throwing the pants and underwear away and just, like, tying something around my waist and walking up. And I was like, that. Yeah. I was like, it was that bad. And it was so. It was so.
Chris
And it wasn't you succumbing to the moment. It just happened.
Spencer
I couldn't do it. There was nothing I could do. It was physically like. I was still trying, but it was just.
Shane Dawson
Just.
Spencer
Well, I'm glad I. Yeah.
Jared
And then you walk in on the couch when you walked.
Spencer
No, I was terrified he was going to be on the couch because you walk right in, right past the couch. And I was going to the.
Shane Dawson
I have a plan next time that happens.
Spencer
Hopefully it doesn't happen again.
Shane Dawson
Your roommate's there, you run in, it's like, oh, I stepped on dog. And you run to your bedroom, cuz you'll smell it and you'll be like, oh, there's just dog. See?
Spencer
He'd be like, why didn't you bend over, take off your shoes? I was like, no, no, don't worry about that.
Chris
You need to be walking around with the change of clothes, dude. Just like, I'm driving with one. I think you need a walking pair of clothes just in case.
Spencer
Well, that's important. I think the first lesson is if fish tastes bad, don't eat the whole thing.
Ryland Adams
Right.
Spencer
Well, you live, you learn. And then.
Ryland Adams
Yeah, but to be fair, there's cheese and other stuff. You thought maybe it was one of those things? Not just.
Spencer
I just thought it was because there's like herbs in it. I was like, yeah, herbs taste like. But I think it would have gone bad.
Chris
So.
Spencer
Yeah.
Shane Dawson
Speaking of good for you. That are. Yeah, you know what, let's clap for that. That was vulnerable. That was a memorable moment.
Spencer
Yeah.
Chris
And a vulnerable one, possibly for people with a fetish. There's someone out there for everyone.
Shane Dawson
There really is. Jared, I have big news for you.
Chris
Oh.
Shane Dawson
I don't know if you're gonna like this though, but maybe you will. Okay.
Chris
Okay. I'm willing to roller coaster. Yeah.
Shane Dawson
So as you guys might know, Jared is a Hot Wheels aficionado. He has Hot Wheels. He has a whole. What would you call it? Shrine, to put it lightly.
Chris
To put it lightly. Yes.
Shane Dawson
He goes on hunts, he tracks them down, he finds one with special little things on them. Like he's a Hot Wheels guy. Right. So me and Ryland are at a grocery store at 10pm Friday and we're. And we're walking around and then I see like a group of 15, 14 year old boys with the broccoli haircuts. So they're cool. And they run in and they go, oh my God, bro, no fucking way. And I'm just like, what's going on? And they all run up to the Hot Wheels wall. What? And they're all like, bro, bro. Does it have it? No. And they're looking for the marks. And I was like, Jared started this. And now Gen Alpha is all about the Hot Wheels. And then I was like, oh, he's gonna be so mad. Cause he's gonna be like, oh, now it's cool. But then Spencer's like, what if he takes advantage of this and becomes the Hot Wheels Daddy.
Spencer
I don't know.
Shane Dawson
You didn't say it like that. Maybe I came up with a name, but the Hot wheels daddy on TikTok, where you're like, hey, bros, look at this one.
Spencer
You know what I mean?
Jared
Hey, hot daddies.
Chris
I'm happy to hear that. But also, I hope in my area, I haven't influenced too many people because it's making it harder out there. You know what I'm saying? Yeah.
Shane Dawson
May.
Chris
It could be a diversion opportunity. I can put him on the hunt for stuff I don't want, or I can help him.
Shane Dawson
Or when they're all looking at the wall, you walk up and wait, wait, I'm visualizing this.
Chris
Okay, we got broccoli lined up against.
Shane Dawson
And you're like, just super boomer, right? You're just like, whoa, that's coolio. Oh, I got that one and that one. That's groovy. And then they're like, ew, this just sucks. Now what a huge boost to my.
Chris
Confidence this segment has been. I. I'm defying all the odds with a very nerdy hobby, but I also possess the ability to make a hobby very uncool to the broccoli generation.
Shane Dawson
That is the broccoli generation.
Jared
All right, can I just.
Chris
I'm at that point in life.
Jared
Are you collecting because you love. Are you collecting for the resell? Are you collecting because you play with them?
Chris
I collect them because I do. Like the hunt, because it's like. Like, lottery, you know, it's like buying a scratcher just like that. Anytime you go into a store, it's like, you bought a scratcher. You took your time to go in here. Maybe they have something rare, maybe they don't, and there's value to them, but it's just cool.
Jared
So it's the hunt, really?
Chris
It's the hunt. You know, it's like my version of Vegas.
Jared
And do you make deals? Like, do you sell them?
Chris
I do sell them sometimes. And you trade them.
Shane Dawson
And my version of Vegas is cute. I like that saying. Yeah, it's my version of Vegas.
Chris
I'm just trying to make it very uncool for the broccolis right now.
Spencer
You know, I do think you can. You could pivot this into being cool, though, being like, the Hot Wheels influencer. I think I'm cooler than you already are.
Shane Dawson
Get a broccoli wig. Like, do they sell those yet? Yes, like a Gen Alpha wig. It'd be hard because you have the.
Jared
Fade, and then they're Going to be like, this guy with the broccoli haircut's a little older than us.
Spencer
This kid also loves Hot Wheels.
Shane Dawson
Wow.
Chris
What's wrong with him?
Ryland Adams
It reminds me, though, like, since the broccoli haircut's so popular, I have a friend who's a millennial who's, like, perming his hair now, so it look. Looks more broccoli. Yeah. And, like, so now that you unfollowed.
Jared
Him, unfriended him, should we change your perms?
Shane Dawson
Should we all get.
Ryland Adams
Wait for the podcast? We should. That'd be incredible.
Shane Dawson
I don't think you can go back. I think once you perm, that's it. It's permanent.
Ryland Adams
Wait, really?
Shane Dawson
That's where they got it from? Yeah.
Jared
I think it lasts for, like, three to six months.
Shane Dawson
Whoa. Oh, speaking of later in the show, we have such a fun thing. First of all, we have so much happening, guys. We have buttons. I'm not gonna even give away what this is yet, but let me just tell you, the power in these buttons is strong.
Ryland Adams
I don't want it.
Chris
It feels. It feels very powerful.
Shane Dawson
All right, we're gonna take a quick little break. When we come back, we're all gonna have perms, and we're gonna be playing with these buttons. Get ready. Hey, sorry to interrupt the episode. Please don't go anywhere. I promise you're gonna want to hear this. Say what I did. Hair. That's terrible. That's right. Today we're gonna be talking about hair. Now, really quickly, I just want you to look at something. Look at my shoulders. You see those bad boys? I know. Thinking. Is this about your hair? Shoulders again, Shane, we get it. No, no, no. Although those are hairless right now. But if you look at my actual shoulders, you will notice. Oh, the snowfall has ended. It's all blue skies from here, baby. That's right. My dandruff, she's gone. My dandruff sashade away. And that is because our sponsor today, which is Harry's, not only has the best razor in the world, they also have the best dandruff shampoo and conditioner in the world. I'm just saying it. This stuff has changed my hair. It has changed my shirts. So I have a lot to thank Harry's for. If you guys don't already know, Harry's is an incredible sponsor of the show. They have the best razors in the. Are giving you guys an amazing deal. All you got to do is go to harry's.comdawson and you can get a $10 trial set for just $5. And in that trial set, you get the five blade razor, the weighted handle, the foaming shave gel, and a travel cover for just five bucks. I have been using these razors for literally like eight years, way before they were even a sponsor. I have one in my shower at all times. It has an orange handle. I love it. So easy to find when I'm in the shower and I'm like, have soap in my eyes. They are so high quality. They're really great. If you haven't tried Harry's, please check them out. Go to Harrys.com Dawson, get the trial set. It's a great gift. Also gift for yourself. Really? Because even if you're getting it for your partner, oh, that's a gift for you, sweetie. Just ask my husband. They have the highest customer satisfaction in the shaving industry. And it's a no risk trial. If you don't like your shave, no worries. It's on them. They also have an awesome convenience subscription service, and you can cancel that at any time. So once Again, go to Harry's.com Dawson, get your $10 trial set for just five bucks and give it a try. You're gonna love it. Also, check out their site. They have so much more than just the razors. Obviously. I talked about the shampoo and the conditioner. They have deodor deodorant. They have a lot of stuff. So have fun, look around, and let's get hairy. What? Let's get not hairy. Although there's nothing wrong with being hairy. All right, I'm gonna go enjoy the rest of the show. Bye. Hey, welcome. Oh, my God. Who's that? Whoa.
Spencer
Hey, everybody.
Shane Dawson
That is not Steve Harley.
Spencer
No, it's hardly.
Chris
It's Steve.
Spencer
Barely.
Shane Dawson
It looks like you killed Steve Hartley and now you're pretending to be him and saying who's gonna notice? That mustache is interesting. It's tiny.
Spencer
Yeah, I was in a rush, and I didn't wanna.
Ryland Adams
Has this been Spencer the whole time?
Shane Dawson
No. Oh, my God. Chris? No.
Spencer
I'm Screeve Bardley.
Shane Dawson
No. Steve. Do you wanna tell us why you're back?
Spencer
Well, I think it's time for us to play a fun little game that's gonna include both you and the audience. But you will be the judges.
Shane Dawson
Oh.
Chris
Ooh.
Spencer
It's time for Farmer's Got Talent.
Shane Dawson
Nice.
Spencer
And just. America's Got Talent. You each have a buzzer.
Ryland Adams
Oh, the one that kills people.
Chris
We asked.
Shane Dawson
We're gonna kill everybody you don't like.
Chris
They consented to this, right?
Spencer
They Did. They did, in fact.
Chris
Okay.
Spencer
We asked for people to send in just any talent they had, just talent submissions. We got tons of responses. Thank you, guys, for sending that in. I have a wide variety of. I tried to pick across the spare because I feel like America's Got Talent is great because it'll be like, a singer, and then it'll be someone doing ra, you know? Yeah, exactly. It's, like, totally random stuff. So I feel like. Like, we're on that wave. Like, I. In the rules generally. I feel like, are we going to do one buzzer and it's over, or.
Shane Dawson
Here's the thing. So when we were coming up with this idea, I was like, oh, it be so fun to do, like, a talent show. We could watch people's talents and, like, maybe there'll be a winner. We can give a prize. Like, we were kind of going through everything, and I was like, but what if we do the buzzers? But then I was like, ooh, but that gets sad, right?
Jared
Because, like, then we're like their mentors.
Shane Dawson
Because I don't want to buzz. So.
Spencer
No, the buzzer means you don't like.
Shane Dawson
You don't like it. It's not the Voice, and you buzz it when you're done. Do you know what I mean? But everybody consented, and they were all like, we're fine with you guys being honest. Jared, I feel, is going to be extra honest.
Chris
I gotta let him, guys.
Shane Dawson
And, like, we all have to take on Personas, right? Like, who's gonna be, like, the mean one? Who's the nice one? Who's the one that's like, I'm just happy to be here. So, like, what kind of judges are we gonna be? I think I'm gonna be nice but honest.
Jared
We need to negotiate my judge salary.
Shane Dawson
Before I'm gonna judge the competition. He literally. You know what he said? We were watching American Idol. I haven't seen American. And I was like, oh, let's try to watch American Idol. A couple of the podcast audiences on American Idol this season, so.
Jared
No way.
Shane Dawson
Whoa. It was very exciting. So we were watching all the pod squads on the. On the podcast, and the new judge is Carrie Underwood, and the previous judge was Katy Perry. And Rylan turns to me and he goes, oh, my God. I said what? He goes, guess how much Carrie Underwood is getting for this. I was like, I don't know what? And he's like, only 12 million.
Spencer
And I was like, is she gonna be okay?
Shane Dawson
I was like, okay. Prayer is up for Carrie.
Jared
Well, you've got to put it to comparison to Katy Perry.
Shane Dawson
So then I said, I was like, well, how much did Katy get?
Jared
25 million a season. And I was like, wow, the Katy cat is that much more, like, dominant than Carrie Underwood. But, yeah, you go to their Spotify streams, and even though the world's trying to take Katy Perry down, I say you go, Katy Perry.
Shane Dawson
Katy Perry's publicist. Oh, my God. That's a perfect segue, because later, we're going to be talking about space. Katy Perry went to space. Oh, my God, it's all coming.
Chris
Or did she?
Ryland Adams
Whoa.
Jared
You're acting like you're landing.
Shane Dawson
Imagine. Imagine your pants in space.
Jared
Oh, can you imagine having the whole.
Ryland Adams
Epic diarrhea in space?
Spencer
They would have, like, sent me out into space if I did what I did in space.
Shane Dawson
So what kind of judges are we gonna be? I think I'm gonna be nice, but honest, Rylan.
Jared
I'm gonna be brutal.
Shane Dawson
You know what?
Jared
I'm sick of it. We are watching American Idol this season, and it's like the judges just are being so nice. They're not even critiquing these people.
Shane Dawson
And it's like, I know. And if they don't. If they don't like it, they just go, you look great tonight.
Jared
It's like, no, we need Simon back. These people, they submitted their videos. God love you for watching this show, and I'm sure you're great at a lot of things, but if I don't like whatever you submitted, I just have to be honest. Listen, we all have pretty harsh with ourselves.
Shane Dawson
Yeah, this is a lot. Wow. Chris. Yes. Bring in the positivity. Are we? Definitely. I'm inspired to watch this video. Watch Chris be the mean one.
Chris
He should be. You should be mean.
Ryland Adams
Oh, okay.
Jared
You're the Simon.
Spencer
You have to say something mean about every single person.
Ryland Adams
I'm ready.
Shane Dawson
Oh, my God. Okay. And jerk.
Chris
I think I'm going to be kind of, like. I'm going to sound nice and optimistic, but maybe a little backhanded. Dig here and there. We'll see.
Shane Dawson
All right. And does the winner get something? Like, should we do something where. Well, let's see how it goes. If you guys enjoyed this, let us know in the comments. And if you guys like it, maybe we'll keep doing it for, like, you know, a month or two, like, every other episode. And then we'll have an ultimate winner, like, maybe a winner from here. We'll go to the semifinals, and then the final person will get, like, $5,000. We'll try to get A brand deal or something. Yeah, maybe we'll do that.
Jared
And if I'm putting my reputation on the line as a judge to look like the Simon Cowell, I need a high rate.
Shane Dawson
Oh, my God.
Ryland Adams
What if the winner comes on the podcast?
Shane Dawson
Yes, yes. There's. There's ideas floating. And let us know in the comments below as we're doing this. Let us know who your favorite was of today. Okay.
Spencer
I also say I just wanted to make sure, like, these people, we were like, we're going to be off. Honest. Like, you know what I mean? All these people in their emails, like, be honest. Don't, like, it's okay. So I just want to, like, clarify that just so everyone's aware that we're not just like everyone.
Shane Dawson
That means there's going to be some bad ones. If you said that what that means.
Spencer
Well, we could start off, this isn't a video. This is just a email that got sent in. I figured they wanted to remain in on us, so I'm not going to put them on blast. But this person said, I can't believe I'm saying this. I can suck a kidney stone out of a dick. My husband. My husband had a kidney stone. I gave him a blowy and within an hour it was out.
Jared
You're out.
Shane Dawson
What?
Jared
You're out.
Shane Dawson
Honestly, I'm buzzing because she said blowy. I don't know.
Jared
Okay. Simon.
Shane Dawson
Hey, I'm honest. Wow. No. Good for you for sucking that kidney stone. How did you know it was a kidney stone? And did you. Never mind. Okay.
Spencer
Okay, let's get to the show. So our first contestant here is named Samantha. And I'm gonna let her.
Shane Dawson
Hey, podcast.
Felicia
Love the podcast.
Shane Dawson
Love Ryland.
Felicia
Love the sip.
Shane Dawson
Love you guys. Love it all conspiracy videos. Please keep those coming. Okay, so my special talent is leaking. It's gross. It's basically spitting on command. But I couldn't figure out how to.
Felicia
Show you, so I have this piece.
Shane Dawson
Of paper and I'm just going to look at.
Chris
This episode is brought to you by Lifelock.
Shane Dawson
Not everyone is careful with your personal.
Chris
Information, which might explain why there's a victim of identity theft every five seconds.
Shane Dawson
In the U.S. fortunately, there's LifeLock. LifeLock monitors hundreds of millions of data.
Chris
Points a second for threats to your identity. If your identity is stolen, a US based restoration specialist will fix it, guaranteed.
Shane Dawson
Or your money back.
Chris
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Shane Dawson
By visiting lifelock.com podcast. Podcast terms apply. You see the wetness. So that's my talent.
Chris
I do that on accident. That's not a talent. I literally just did it in a video and spit all over the camera, and I didn't send it in as a submission somewhere.
Shane Dawson
Samantha, that was very vulnerable. You took. You took an insecurity, and you turned it into a talent, and we love that.
Jared
Was she insecure about it?
Shane Dawson
Oh, I don't know.
Jared
She seemed pretty confident about, say, Samantha, I love it. I love what you shared with us, but you're not making it into the top 10.
Shane Dawson
O.
Jared
But I love you.
Shane Dawson
Tough judges.
Spencer
Tough judges. Okay.
Chris
But we love you.
Ryland Adams
We do.
Spencer
All right, so now we're going to do. This is Marley, and she is going to do a little performance.
Shane Dawson
I love that name. Okay. Wow. Wow. Okay. Oh, oh, oh, oh. Hiccup.
Spencer
Wow.
Jared
The mean judge, Chris, is the Simon.
Spencer
Oh, my God.
Shane Dawson
Oh, my God. Okay.
Chris
I see potential for talent here. I do. I'm here to be honest. This is great. Keep it up.
Shane Dawson
Yeah.
Chris
You're gonna do great things. But I was. I had to bust.
Shane Dawson
I mean.
Ryland Adams
Okay. I mean, there was a hiccup there was. It just. Yeah, it needs a little more practicing, but that's incredible. I couldn't do that. Most people who play guitar can't do that. She's very good. She's gonna be even better.
Jared
So what I respect is that she's being vulnerable, showing a real talent. Not that the Glee King wasn't a real talent, but you know what I mean? This is vulnerable.
Spencer
Yeah. This is learned. Not.
Shane Dawson
Yeah, yeah.
Chris
I can't accidentally play the harmonica and the guitar at the same time.
Shane Dawson
You know, I think she's amazing. I thought it was great. And I love the name Marley, and I love the red hair and the eyebrow piercing. I think she's a star, baby.
Spencer
All right. Okay. This is coming in from Mariah. Mariah.
Shane Dawson
I. Shane Dawson, podcast. My talent is pumpkin whistle. Really, really good. I know you can't see my face for me to prove that.
Spencer
I hope that's okay.
Shane Dawson
What? You're just gonna have to trust me on this one, pookies.
Spencer
And if I.
Shane Dawson
If you hear me breathing a lot. Sorry.
Chris
Make this. This is nightmare fuel. I need this to stop. I don't know if this cat is incubating eggs, if it has testicles. She's showing to us right now. But the sound in the background she's making, it might be beautiful. But to this image, it's giving me horror movie vibes.
Shane Dawson
Can I just say, sometimes something is so funny that I can't process it? And, like, I. That. That her whistling off camera with this.
Chris
It's like a Spencer, like, right here.
Shane Dawson
So funny. Like, she needs to post this on TikTok. Go viral, girl.
Jared
This isn't for me. I also buzz, but I do think you should post it on TikTok. The reason I can't give you this is because I need to see your face. But I do think that this is right up Spencer's alley, and you'd get a like from him, and maybe, just maybe, you'd become a TikTok star.
Spencer
Maybe have a chance. Different stuffed animal without big balls on it.
Chris
I would like to learn a little bit more of the creative direction she went into this with.
Shane Dawson
Yeah.
Chris
But I do like it.
Shane Dawson
Good job. Great job. Great.
Spencer
Do you want to see someone with multiple talents in one video, or do you want to see someone with musical talents?
Chris
Let's get musical.
Shane Dawson
Yeah. Let's get musical.
Chris
Let's get musical.
Shane Dawson
Okay.
Spencer
Let's get musical. This is Felicia.
Shane Dawson
I love the eye wall. Oh, my God. What?
Jared
You're an.
Chris
No, no.
Jared
You're a come farter. What do you call it?
Chris
I needed it to stop because I promised myself I wouldn't cry today. That was the voice of an angel.
Ryland Adams
That.
Jared
That was a real assignment.
Spencer
Cow movie.
Chris
That was good.
Shane Dawson
That was good.
Jared
Somebody put her on American Idol.
Shane Dawson
She's really good. What was her name? Oh, Felicia.
Spencer
Felicia.
Shane Dawson
Yeah, Felicia.
Ryland Adams
Her voice is.
Shane Dawson
She's a front runner. She is.
Jared
Right now she's coming in the number on spot.
Spencer
All right, let's go with a very powerful performance.
Shane Dawson
Oh, I love that.
Spencer
The key Number here is 334.
Chris
Interesting.
Shane Dawson
We got it. What? Oh. Whoa. Come on, baby. Come on. Whoa. Wow. You would have your pants. Yep.
Spencer
So that was £334. Jesus power.
Chris
Wow.
Shane Dawson
Good enough.
Ryland Adams
And she didn't prolapse, which is insane because how?
Shane Dawson
Well, we don't know. She's wearing shorts.
Jared
I bet. I bet the hemorrhoids are popping. I mean, I'm just saying, like, I do a hard weight day, and it's like, I'm too old for that now. It's like. Then I'm like, okay.
Shane Dawson
Wow. I thought that was really good. Very impressive.
Chris
Yeah. You could probably beat me up. So I definitely am not gonna buzz, and I'm very impressed by that. And she looks to be like she has a long career ahead of her. We could be looking at the strongest woman in the world.
Spencer
All right, shout out Anna.
Ryland Adams
That was awesome.
Chris
And her name is the same backwards as it is forward.
Shane Dawson
Whoa.
Spencer
That's true.
Chris
That's cool.
Spencer
All right, let's go. With a multi talented Serena. She's gonna demonstrate a few different things to us.
Shane Dawson
Okay.
Felicia
Hey, Shane Dawson. Podcast. I wanted to show you a couple skills I can do here. I'm doing some balisong knife flipping tricks.
Shane Dawson
Which is pretty fun.
Felicia
You know, you should get it as a fidget toy. I like to do it.
Shane Dawson
See, here's me just twirling around. It's easy to pick up fun. Get one. Make yourself one.
Felicia
Now I can have a little mini skateboard trick.
Shane Dawson
Boom.
Chris
Boom.
Shane Dawson
I need that rail. I'm just having fun. See? Boom.
Spencer
That's a good one.
Shane Dawson
Did a little trick there. This is my Stanley Stanish. Don't you dare Buzz.
Chris
I. I saw a little toe drag on. On the fingerboard.
Shane Dawson
Extra trick. Oh, that's hard.
Felicia
Extra trick.
Chris
Boom.
Shane Dawson
That's hard.
Felicia
Thank you for letting me showcase my skills. I'm not great at everything, but I have a little handful of weird stuff that I can do because I like to have fun.
Shane Dawson
Yes.
Chris
Wow.
Jared
Posted on Instagram. I honestly think it was entertaining.
Shane Dawson
I don't think it was her personality. Here's the thing, Felicia better singer. Her personality. It's not a singing competition, guys. It's a entertainment competition.
Spencer
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Shane Dawson
So she could be a frontrunner too.
Chris
She has a cool look.
Ryland Adams
Yeah.
Chris
She likes butterfly knives and tech decks.
Jared
She kept me the. There is what I'll say. Like, I was entertained. I was intrigued. I want to know more.
Chris
I was going to buzz cuz she was being a little too much for me. With all the talent, to be honest with you. Maybe a master of none, but the jack of all trades. I thought we were heading in that direction.
Jared
You were overwhelmed.
Chris
And then I saw the babloop bloop.
Jared
Thing and that almost made you come. Crap.
Chris
And then I was like, whoa, we're dealing with the prodigy, right? How can I buzz this?
Jared
I love her.
Spencer
All right, well, thank you, Serena. Now up to next, we have Savannah, and she is gonna go classic on our asses.
Chris
Ooh, interesting look you gave while you said that.
Shane Dawson
I feel a piano coming. What's up, Shane and friends? Hey, my name is Savannah King, and today I'm hopefully gonna shake it up for you a little bit and I'm gonna give you some Shakespeare. Now, I just wanted to give you guys a little bit of context for the monologue I'm doing because I know Shakespeare's language isn't for everybody. Did she shoot this on the sun?
Spencer
Yes.
Jared
I almost want to buzz because I can't see her.
Shane Dawson
I only see nostrils.
Chris
Yeah. Is she reviewing the world's brightest flashlight.
Spencer
It doesn't even look like that on mine.
Shane Dawson
Just bear with me. I know Shakespeare's not for everybody, but.
Chris
I think that about to get a buzz from me. She doesn't even start a little condescending, not thinking I get Shakespeare, so.
Shane Dawson
Yeah. I hope you enjoy Juliet's monologue.
Felicia
Thank you.
Shane Dawson
Oh, I'm scared. Thou know' st the mask of night is on my face Else would a maiden blush but paint my cheek for that which thou hast heard me speak tonight. Fain would I dwell on form. Fain, fain deny would I soak farewell compliment. Dost thou love me? I know thou will say I and I will take thy word. But if thou swear some may prove false that lovers perjuries, they say Jove laughs. Oh, gentlemen, I don't want to buzz, but I want to stop it. Look, listen really, really good, but maybe send in something a little more comedic and a little more of this century. I agree.
Chris
As I was watching it, because Shakespeare is very serious. I saw comedic genius in that act.
Shane Dawson
I did, too.
Jared
So I saw Rachel McAdams in the Notebook. I just want that exclusively.
Shane Dawson
I saw nostrils, but I also saw Rachel McAdams.
Jared
I think she's very talented. We're just not gay enough for Shakespeare.
Shane Dawson
Gay people like Shakespeare.
Jared
Yes. It's like. I mean, like, gay people like theater.
Spencer
Wow. I like gay people. Like, like musicals.
Ryland Adams
I do like them.
Jared
Very gay.
Shane Dawson
You are gay. She's actually a good actor. Have her send in, like, her doing something from, like, Hannah Montana or. She's giving me, like, comedic genius vibes.
Spencer
All right, we have one final musical submission with a song some of you might be familiar with. This is from two people. This is from Cheyenne and Caitlyn, and I believe they are sisters.
Shane Dawson
Hey, what's up, you guys?
Felicia
Yes.
Shane Dawson
We're such big fans of the podcast.
Felicia
And we watch it every other Sunday when it comes out. We've been watching Shane since 2015. That's 10 years, which is practically a throwback. You know what else is a throwback?
Shane Dawson
3, 2, 1. Have no fear.
Felicia
Telling me that danger is near?
Shane Dawson
I'm getting close to you so I.
Felicia
Can watch your back?
Shane Dawson
They can hear the high note.
Felicia
He's ready to attack.
Shane Dawson
Oh, but I'm not a superhero Row. I'm not that kind of guy?
Felicia
But I can save you, baby, give me a try?
Shane Dawson
Cause I'm running out of time? I know what I came to do and I didn't come to lose?
Felicia
So I'll fight until just.
Chris
That if.
Shane Dawson
You'Re in danger I'm here to save.
Spencer
That is so funny.
Felicia
That's what I'm made of.
Jared
Give you my super love Incredible.
Shane Dawson
We loved it. Oh, my God.
Ryland Adams
That's so cool.
Shane Dawson
A little. A little manipulative singing that. One of the judges is hugging at my heartstrings.
Chris
That is a talent, though. Reading the room and getting what you want.
Jared
Had the other girl done the notebook.
Shane Dawson
She would have won that. That was so good. Also, I just. I love. I just love all of this. Also. Them saying 10 years ago was 2015. That's insane. 2015 feels like yesterday to me.
Chris
It's not long ago.
Shane Dawson
How old were you in 2015?
Spencer
26 now, so I was 16.
Shane Dawson
That's insane. Oh, my God. I was literally exactly Spencer's age. I was 26.
Spencer
So I have to come up with a song now.
Shane Dawson
Oh, yeah.
Ryland Adams
That unlocked so many memories for me.
Shane Dawson
I know. Me too. That was an interesting time. Was it a dark time? No, it was a good time. I don't know. It was. It was a time. It was definitely a time. Wow. Well, that was so good. Is that all of our talents for this?
Spencer
That's all we got for this round. I figured we gotta, like, space it out, you know, we gotta. Because I feel like this is something we could do again. I feel like, you know, it's fun to, like, see what the growers and.
Jared
Farmers got, and this really gives people a chance that didn't get to submit before to be aware of the segment to really prepare their talents and come out swinging next time.
Shane Dawson
Here's what I'm gonna say. This is a little special announcement, guys. Do we all have a winner in mind? Yes. Well, I'm gonna say my winner was Felicia.
Ryland Adams
Felicia.
Chris
Felicia.
Spencer
Felicia's moving on to the next round.
Chris
Felicia, you're going to Hollywood.
Shane Dawson
I think Felicia. I think. Yes. She's moving on to the next round. But just for winning this round, I'm gonna send Felicia $1,000. No.
Chris
So you could buy that ticket to Holly again.
Shane Dawson
Yes. If you guys want to join this competition, send us an email. Shane Dawsonpodcast stuffmail.com and yeah, just know there's a lot on the line here. The winner of, like, the episode will get $1,000, but the winner of the finals, like, because we're going to do maybe three of these and the top three that move on to the next round. The winner of that will get $5,000.
Jared
Sponsor for this.
Shane Dawson
Not yet, baby. I got to find one.
Ryland Adams
Congrats, Felicia. Oh, my God.
Shane Dawson
Yes. Good job, Felicia. So that was so fun. Fun. Let us know in the comments. Yeah. Should we keep doing this? Is it fun? And I thought it was great.
Spencer
Yeah.
Chris
Yeah.
Ryland Adams
I love this.
Shane Dawson
All right. All right. We're gonna take a quick little break and when we come back, it's time for a rabbit hole, baby.
Spencer
See you soon.
Shane Dawson
Hey. Hey. What are you doing? I see all those tabs open, I know what's happening. You're watching the podcast and they got a few tabs open and you're checking out all these websites, which is fine. Listen, I'm not telling you that you have to solely focus on us, but what I'm telling you, you is all those websites are lame. The Internet needs a website all about you. But how are we ever going to do that? Websites are confusing with all the code. You don't want to be in the matrix. Well, luckily there is a company that has figured this out. This company is called Squarespace. That's right. Today's episode is sponsored by Squarespace. If you don't know who they are, really, I feel like I have been hearing about them for so long. But if you don't already know, Squarespace is an all in one website platform designed to help you stand out and and succeed online. Whether you're just starting out or scaling your business, Squarespace gives you everything you need to claim your domain, showcase your offerings with a professional website, grow your brand, and get paid all in one place. It is so easy, literally. There's templates, there's a lot of things you can do, like drag and drop style to make your own website, to personalize it, however you want, but they also do so many more things to help you out. They help you with email campaigns. If you are a business owner or small business, you know that email campaigns are huge. That is how you let your audience know that you have a new product or a new service. And with Squarespace email campaigns, all the tools you need to engage clients, promote your services and grow your businesses are built in. You can schedule the emails to go out to your customers at certain times. They also now let you sell content, if you don't already know. You can sell online courses, blogs, videos, have memberships. You can have a fully customized website that you made yourself and you can put all your content on there. Put a pine pay walls or have it be like a subscription service. You can set all the prices, have all your content in one place. And if you have a business that isn't like content based, maybe you're nail tech or you sell products. Squarespace Gives you everything you need to grow your business and get paid all in one place. They have features that help you track your inventory, your shipping, your fulfillment. You can easily simplify your workflow and give your customers a seamless online shopping experience. So check it out. Make your own website. It's time. So check it out. Go to squarespace. Squarespace.com grower. Get a free trial, and when you're ready to launch, use offer code grower to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. So check it out, have fun, make a website and help your business grow. Thank you so much, Squarespace, and I hope you guys enjoy the show. Bye. Okay, we're back, and it's time to fall down the rabbit hole, guys. I fell down such an insane rabbit hole recently about space. So it started, obviously, because Katy Perry went to space and I watched it live.
Jared
How all good things start.
Shane Dawson
I know everybody's mad about it and this and that, and I get it. But what the crazy part to me was like, the floating of it all, because I know. I get it. We all know that when you're in space, you float. Zero gravity, all that. But then I started thinking, like, what does that actually feel like? And then I saw an astronaut talking about it, and she was like, well, you can't, like, sit down and you can't. You can't, like, lay down. You can't walk. You can't do anything because you're always floating.
Jared
Not laying down freaks me out.
Shane Dawson
Right. Oh, we'll get to it. I have video footage. So then it's like, so you're always just floating, but then all your guts and everything inside your body is floating and you're weightless. And then when you come back to earth, you feel like you just took a fucking edible and you're like a thousand pounds, because. Do you know what I mean? Obviously, if you're up there for five minutes, not really, but after a little time, yes.
Jared
So did they strap in to go to sleep or do they just float around aimlessly to go to sleep and then accidentally hit a button that ejects them into.
Shane Dawson
That sounds comforting. No, I have video. Okay. So I started falling down that rabbit hole. So then I saw this video. It was like AI really was listening to me because it recommended me this video called Space Station Tour by Suni Shout Out. Yes. By Sunita Williams. How do you know Sunita?
Jared
I fell down a space rabbit hole like a year and a half ago. Figuring out how to. How all of the different countries contribute to the International Space Station. What it's like to live up there. How they poop and eat and all the things.
Shane Dawson
Yes, that's what. I fell down.
Jared
Yeah.
Shane Dawson
Have you seen any of this?
Ryland Adams
I don't think so.
Shane Dawson
Right. Okay. So I've seen videos, you know, of, like, people in space and floating and whatever. And I've always just been like, yeah, I get it. In space. For some reason, this woman's video, which has like 112 million views, it's iconic. I'll put it in the description. Not sponsored by space, I guess NASA. It is insane. Okay, so let me just show you some of the highlights from this. So I'm going to start with this moment.
Felicia
So this is node 2. This is a really cool module. Of course, most of these modules you'll see they have four sides and they're put together that way we could sort of work on a flat plane.
Shane Dawson
Okay, let me pause. First of all, the hair. Killing it. Fucking iconic. Also, no conspiracies here, but I'm just going to say I didn't see Katie's flying that high.
Chris
Oh, that's just her hair. One of the things that will be brought up.
Shane Dawson
So, yes, let me just break down why this is so scary. So if you look at this, right, she's floating in the space station, okay? Every wall. There's four walls. Every wall has, like, laptops and stuff on it, right? So you might think, okay, that's fine. But what she's about to say threw me into, I don't know the word for it. Like a total spiral that made me start to get vertigo, a tailspin, a real tailspace spin. So she says, well, you know, you have your office on this wall, so you can, like, work on your office, but then you also have an office on the ceiling above you, because it's not really a ceiling. Because when you float, you reorient yourself. And now the ceiling is the floor, and the floor is the ceiling, and the wall is a wall. But then you can also go to the other wall and reorient yourself again. And she's like, we don't know what the ceiling is and what the wall is. The only way that we can even tell that is we can can't. That's insane.
Ryland Adams
I feel sick.
Shane Dawson
Like, imagine, Chris, if you were just on the ceiling right now, like, sitting, just like you are, but you're sitting up there and you look at me and it's just like we're looking at each other right here, except for we're flipped. Do you know what I'M saying, how.
Jared
Are we going to have. In 20 years, how are we going to have furniture in space?
Shane Dawson
You can't sit.
Jared
I know. So we're just not going to have couches or beds or anything when we're all existing up there?
Shane Dawson
Oh, I don't know.
Chris
Well, there are planets with similar gravitational pulls, so I think of lot A.
Ryland Adams
But how that must mess you up. Messed you up so badly. Like, not. There's like no floor. There's no, like the thing you're used to doesn't exist. That would mess you up.
Shane Dawson
Okay, so with that, with that knowledge.
Felicia
Keep watching a wall, a floor, another wall, or the ceiling. But you know, again, all you have to do is turn yourself and your reference changes.
Shane Dawson
I'm gonna puke. I'm gonna puke.
Felicia
Where four out of six of us sleep.
Shane Dawson
Get ready for the.
Felicia
People always ask about sleeping in space. Do you lie down? Are you in a bed? Not really. Because it doesn't matter. You don't really have the sensation of lying down.
Shane Dawson
I'm just sitting in your sleeping bag.
Felicia
So here's one sleep station right here. So I'm inside. It's sort of like a little phone booth, but it's pretty comfy. I've got a sleeping bag right here that we sleep in. So we don't have sort of like a little bit of a cover. We, we don't fly all over the place. But you know, you can sleep in any orientation. I have it sleeping feeling like I'm standing up right now, but like you saw, I'm on the floor. But it doesn't matter.
Shane Dawson
See what I'm saying? She feels like she's standing up, but she's actually on the floor.
Spencer
As soon as the camera turned, you could tell. As soon as the camera turns, like, okay, standing now.
Jared
I just don't understand how you fall asleep. I don't know, I guess you just get so tired that eventually you just sleep.
Ryland Adams
I can't imagine, like some people, people get seasick. Like, what would this, would this kill you? Like, we can vomit, everyone.
Shane Dawson
That's what I started thinking when the Katy Perry thing, I was like, you know what? I don't know if I could do this. Like if I was floating, I think I'd have a full on vertigo attack. Like, it would be bad.
Jared
And what does puke look like in zero gravity?
Shane Dawson
Crazy.
Spencer
That would be a nightmare.
Shane Dawson
Oh, we'll get to it.
Felicia
Turn over. And I sleep upside down. I can't have it. I don't have any sensation in my head that Tells me that I'm upside down.
Shane Dawson
Right? The blood doesn't rush your head, so you don't know you're upside down. Chris.
Ryland Adams
I hate it.
Felicia
Okay, number two right here.
Shane Dawson
All right, so she's about to talk about taking a guys strap in because it gets gnarly.
Jared
What if you don't make it there? Like Spencer or Jared?
Shane Dawson
Oh.
Spencer
They'D be like, you have to land. You gotta land this thing.
Jared
And I know she's not going to do this today, but I am curious about sex and spring face.
Spencer
Oh, I looked it up. According. Supposedly.
Jared
Of course he did.
Spencer
They said. They said no one. They don't think anyone's ever had sex with.
Shane Dawson
Why?
Spencer
I don't know.
Jared
Well, that seems.
Shane Dawson
But don't you need gravity for the come to come or no? Do you know?
Ryland Adams
Well, but you can vomit without it. Surely you could do that without it.
Shane Dawson
You can eject and I always vomit.
Jared
No, I think it would be great too, Chris.
Shane Dawson
Okay. All right, let's. Let's watch her.
Felicia
But you see, it's pretty small, so you have to have pretty good aim. And you be. Be ready to make sure things get let go the right direction. And it smells a little bit, so I'm closing it up. Oh, and that's of course for number two and this guy right here. We need one of these is for number one. And then if things get really that.
Shane Dawson
It'S like a little hose with suction. Imagine that just by the couch.
Chris
Perfect.
Shane Dawson
Oh, that's evolution. Elon. Musk. Elon, you want people back on your side? Elon, give us a pee tube in our Tesla.
Chris
Make a car that could run off P. And then give me a tube that goes directly to the gas tank.
Jared
Oh, now we're thinking converts it.
Shane Dawson
Wow. Okay, so she's about to show the wiping situation we have.
Felicia
You don't just wipe wipes just to make sure we clean up here because, you know, just like the water I showed you, the number one stuff can sort of go all over the place if you don't aim correctly. And did I mention mention both of these have a little bit of suction, so they should keep things.
Shane Dawson
So if you have diarrhea, good luck because that is gonna fly. And then you're gonna have to like, oh. Catch it and wipe the walls down with wipes. Because it got on the walls.
Chris
I'm sure they do not allow Trader Joe's salmon sandwiches on the flanks.
Spencer
They better not.
Shane Dawson
They better check. Is that why they have to eat? I mean, I know they dehydrate all the food because it's space. But, like, do they have to be very particular? Because if you eat the something spicy or crazy, that ship is done.
Spencer
Yeah. Loafs.
Jared
Do you have space food here for us?
Shane Dawson
We should try space food. That'd be cool. No, I don't. Okay. So anyway, so I fell down that rabbit hole. So then I started thinking. This episode is brought to you by Selectquote. Life insurance can have a huge impact on our family's future. With Selectquote, getting covered with the right policy for you is simple and affordable. Selectquote's licensed insurance agents will tailor your experience to find a life insurance policy for your needs in as little as minutes. And Select Quote partners with carriers that provide policies for many conditions. Select Quote. They shop, you save. Go to selectquote.com Spotify Pod today to get started. Where does the poop go, right? Like, does it just get sucked out into space? But then is there just turds floating in space? Like, I was, like, very confused. And then I started thinking, on airplanes, where does that go out? Whatever. It doesn't, but I don't think. But then I kept watching this video, and in this video, she explained. So, you know, when, like, a rocket comes back home, I am not a scientist, but when, you know, when people from space come back home, they're in a little capsule, and what happens is there's, like, layers to the capsule, right? And all the layers burn up in the atmosphere as it's coming back. So all that's left is this little capsule that they land in, and there's a parachute, and everybody screams, okay. One of the layers that burns up in the atmosphere is all of their poop. They put all of their poop into this layer, and it burns up.
Ryland Adams
No way.
Shane Dawson
So now Sunita's poop, it just burns up in the atmosphere.
Spencer
So we're just, like, breathing or I don't know.
Shane Dawson
So I'm just like, is that. So then I started. I'm like, they put all their trash. So then when I fell down the rabbit hole about Blue Origin, and I was watching an interview with, I think it was Gail King, and she's like, you know, we're not just going to space to have fun.
Jared
It's also for attention.
Shane Dawson
Jeff Bezos has an idea, and I think she was not supposed to say this because then she had to, like, ret. But she's like, he's gonna start throwing all of our. Throwing all of our trash and all of our waste up into space and, like, letting it burn. I was like, what does that mean? What Blue Origin wants to do is take the waste here and figure out a way to put it in space to make our planet cleaner. So anyways, this was crazy, right? So this woman, I was like, wow, this was like, you know, 12 years ago or something. Like, I wonder what Sunita's doing now. So I Google her name. And did you guys hear about these people that were trapped in space for nine months?
Jared
Yes.
Ryland Adams
Yes.
Shane Dawson
It was Sunita.
Jared
I've been following what she heard.
Shane Dawson
Queen. She was trapped in space for nine fucking months. No way.
Jared
She went up on what was supposed to be a simple mission, and then something went wrong on the way up. And it was bad enough to where they didn't feel comfortable bringing them back. And then they were bidding for a long time on who was what, what space company was going to be able to bring them back.
Shane Dawson
Yeah. So. So then when they brought her back, she has to go to, like, she has to do all these rehabs and all these things for her body. Because when you're up there for nine months and you come back down, it's like you're like a thousand pounds. You can't walk.
Jared
They're not even allowed to try to walk before a bunch of physical therapy.
Shane Dawson
You forgot how to walk. You forgot how to sit. You forgot, like, what land feels like like that. Like, you forgot what it's like to not pee in a suction tube. Like, I don't even been. There's just so much happening with that.
Ryland Adams
So she's okay now?
Shane Dawson
She's okay. She's working it out. She's getting her body back and her.
Spencer
I don't know, getting snatched for summer baby.
Jared
Is she, like, documenting her return? Like, getting. Wow, I gotta look into that podcast. She should start a YouTube channel of, like, recovering from being trapped in space. And I'd watch every video.
Shane Dawson
Yeah. Okay, everybody calm down. Are you sitting? Okay, good, because it is time, once again, to kick off. Sorry, I'm wearing jeans. So, like, my kick wasn't as dramatic as it usually is. I didn't want to rip them. Sometimes if you kick off too hard, you rip your jeans, it ruins your day. Trust me, it's happened before. But you know what won't ruin your day? You know what will make your day better? You know what will change your day every day moving forward. Kickoff. That's right. Today's episode is sponsored by Kickoff. If you don't already know, I've talked about them for the last maybe two years now. Kickoff is the number one credit building app in the App Store and plans start at just $5 a month. No credit check, no hidden fees and no interest. Kickoff helps you build your credit fast. And listen, having good credit is so important. I've talked about this before and I know you're gonna be like, shane, we've already heard this. You talked about how you had bad credit when you were in your 20s. You know what? I'm gonna talk about it again because I feel like it is so important. Nobody told me this when I was like 22. No one said, hey, you should check your credit. Hey, when you're looking for a car and you're trying to get a loan or you're trying to buy your first house, they will run your credit. And if it's not great, that's going to be a problem and it's going to take you years to build it back up. But luckily Kickoff is available now. I wish it was there in my 20s. And if your credit is under 600, you could jump up like 28 points in your first month. It's so easy to use. You can sign up in just a few minutes. And it's so simple. You make on time payments. Credit bureaus see it as good behavior and your credit grows fast. They have over 100,000 positive reviews on the App Store and 98% are five stars stars. So basically it works with autopay. So once you pick your plan, you'll start auto paying for that plan and the credit bureau see it as good behavior. And that's how your credit can grow. So check it out. It's so easy. Just go to getkickoff.com grower and get your first month for just $1. That's getkickoff.com grower that's get K-I-K-O-F f.com grower to get your first month for just $1 and your credit will start growing right away. Must sign up via getkickoff.com growing up to activate offer. Offer applies to new customers first month only, subject to approval. Offers subject to change terms and conditions may apply. Pointstat based on Equifax VantageScore 3.0 changes for kickoff users starting under 600 who made their first on time payment between January 2021 and March 2024 payment credit activity outside Kickoff can have an impact on your credit. Individual results may vary. So thank you so much, Kickoff. Please check it out. It really is helpful. Go to their website. Look at all the testimonials. They have helped so many people. So thank you so much. Kickoff And I hope you guys enjoy the rest of the show. Bye. Okay, did anybody else have any rabbit holes that they fell down this week?
Chris
Well, you mentioned blue origin.
Shane Dawson
Well, you've got a blue origin. Rabbit hole.
Chris
Well, there are some people who are saying that the blue origin actually never happened. It was all done in a studio.
Shane Dawson
Hold on.
Jared
Is this a conspiracy?
Shane Dawson
This sounds like. Hey, welcome back. We are now in the conspiracy corner. All right. Whoa, whoa. People actually think that this didn't happen. Happen.
Chris
So.
Shane Dawson
Because I watched it happen.
Chris
So there's a few. Well, I mean, you watched something happen, you watched a production of some sort.
Jared
But saying it very matter of fact.
Chris
Well, allegedly.
Shane Dawson
Just a theory. It looked like a penis.
Chris
But here's a few things. Okay, let me just prefix this with saying that people believe the blue origin and Jeff Bezos and this launch, sending these people into space, which. Where they went is the edge of our atmosphere, which is only like 62 miles up. Oh, and the space station is 255 miles up. Okay. So it's like the edge of. It's like saying, I went swimming in the ocean and. And putting your feet in the water.
Shane Dawson
I see.
Chris
You know, they did go to space. Like, I went in the water with my feet. But the few facts that have been put out there that you can actually see is, like, you had mentioned their hair doesn't move. I mean, we just saw what zero gravity actually looks like.
Jared
Gail King is also a part of this.
Chris
I'm just saying there's a reason all those people were on that.
Shane Dawson
Oprah was like, I ain't doing it. Yeah, imagine.
Chris
Imagine just like, what's the come up, dude? She was just Oprah's friend, and now.
Shane Dawson
She'S like, comfort Gail.
Chris
And now she's on like, Good Morning America. Now she's in space.
Shane Dawson
She's a queen.
Chris
She's a queen with. With the last name King. I would love to be how cool as that. But what I'm getting at is so a few. A few reasons they're suggesting it may be fake is when they landed, when you go up into airplane, even they pressurize the cockpit and everything because the atmosphere is different. So just like, have you ever gone underwater and your head hurts because you've gone so deep? It's because the deeper you go into water, the denser it is and the more pressure it's putting on. So air is the same way. So the higher you go up, that's why when you go down in the airplane, your ears pop and all that stuff happens to you. So when they landed, you can actually see the door open towards the inside for a second. And then Jeff Bezos comes over like a minute later and has to use a tool to open the door. The reason they're saying that's weird and because it is weird, is they have to pressurize this thing in order for it to go that high. So you would never be able to open the door from the inside of it. They have to use a special tool that depressurizes the cabin and then they can open the door. Okay, so how the door can never open into the inside. So they're saying that potentially is proof that this is all put together and it didn't happen the way they say.
Shane Dawson
I have a mini theory to add on to that. Did you see him face plant?
Spencer
Yeah.
Shane Dawson
Did he?
Spencer
Yeah.
Shane Dawson
So right after that happened, he face planted, he like ran and then he like fell into a hole.
Jared
So it's a big distraction, right?
Shane Dawson
He saw the little door open and he was like, oh, fuck, I'm a face plant. That's what they'll talk about. And they're like, katie, okay, we had to up at the door. Can you like kiss the dirt? Do something distracting? Listen, I do not believe that it was fake, but that's very, very. I don't know. I do not want to go to space. Like, I. Like, there's nothing about it that sounds fun to me. I don't want to float. Like, I don't. I don't. Well, no, I don't. I don't know. I just don't have any urge for. I like being on Earth.
Spencer
Roller coaster is the most you get.
Shane Dawson
Yeah. Why? Why go to space when you could just go to space? Six Flags. So much easier.
Ryland Adams
That should be their new slogan.
Spencer
I saw this online. Another alternative conspiracy about Blue Origin. I guess this is assuming they really did it and that it's like conditioning the really wealthy and powerful for their escape plan if something bad happens on Earth where it's like. It's basically like these flights are getting them used to going up and out of space. So that way when they need to, they can just do it easily and no problem.
Shane Dawson
Like test runs, I heard they're doing. I don't know if this is a rumor or not, but I heard they're doing another one soon.
Ryland Adams
When was the One World like the billionaires when?
Shane Dawson
I don't know. But also I saw like there's so many YouTube, they do this all the time. But this time people got really upset because it. I don't know why?
Jared
Because it was publicized.
Shane Dawson
Right. But they do it all the time. Like that a bunch of YouTubers went like a year ago. Like, they do it a lot. What would we do if they came to us and they were like, we want you guys to do a podcast.
Jared
No, I don't think I could do it.
Shane Dawson
I don't. Like, I don't dream about, like, one day I'll go to space. Like, I don't. I'm like, that's a nightmare.
Ryland Adams
Yeah. I also don't want to go, but like, are they gonna pay us like.
Shane Dawson
A lot of money, Chris?
Ryland Adams
Because then.
Jared
No, because in fact, the opposite. Everyone's gonna scream at you for how much money it costs public taxpayers, when everyone else can't afford things.
Shane Dawson
Chris has a price it. Blue Origin Chris is for sale. 10 million will throw him to space.
Jared
Jeff Bezos, a few listening.
Chris
And for all. All the people that are into it, he could bring some bears with him and potentially film the first space pornography movie.
Spencer
Well, you can film the genius.
Chris
I'm just saying, it's a world's first.
Jared
I'm shocked a porn company hasn't bid for that.
Spencer
It's pretty expensive.
Shane Dawson
Okay, I have an idea because I want to use the button. Like, I feel like we haven't used the button in a while and they're just sitting here waiting.
Chris
Oh, mine's still warm.
Shane Dawson
So I was thinking for the rest of the conspiracy corner, if I'm telling a theory and you guys are just not, you don't believe you can also.
Chris
Do it during the recap?
Shane Dawson
Oh no, we'll do it.
Jared
Yeah, go for it.
Shane Dawson
Okay, this is big, guys. We have a Disney update. Don't you dare buzz me.
Jared
You have your. You've piqued my interest.
Shane Dawson
Okay, this was an email from Alex and he said, Disney brick update Shane and friends. I'm currently at Disneyland. And now they have marked the brick and shut it off using tape because I really don't want people to lift it. Now let me show you proof of this. This is insane. Look, they have taped the secret brick.
Jared
They knew they're sick of it. They're sick of people like us going like it's been up before.
Shane Dawson
Which is crazy though, cuz to me it looks like they're highlighting it.
Ryland Adams
I was going to say, doesn't that draw more attention to it?
Shane Dawson
Right.
Jared
I'm sure they have the implant employee just hovering.
Shane Dawson
Wow, that is so crazy. So it does exist.
Jared
It does. They just are trying to cover it up.
Shane Dawson
It exists. Okay, this is a Stanley cup update. So.
Chris
Oh, Jesus. Stanley Cups again.
Shane Dawson
They're back.
Chris
Perfect.
Jared
Okay, what PR stunt did they fake now?
Ryland Adams
Well, Spencer sent me this one Stanley Cup.
Spencer
It's the sequel to the PR stunt of the car. It's the fire one.
Shane Dawson
Alright, so here we go. Walking with scrapes and bruises from the scariest moment of my life because my Stanley cup saved the dash from crushing my legs. What?
Spencer
She was essentially in a car crash and the Stanley was like in the cup holder and she claims that it held the entire dashboard up and didn't crush her legs. And the Stanley, the Cup. I don't go back. It's pretty fine. So. I don't know. I don't know.
Shane Dawson
Okay.
Spencer
I don't know.
Shane Dawson
I have an. I have an idea. We get a junker, we put a Stanley in there, we crash that and we see if this is true. That's iconic.
Spencer
I hope it's true.
Chris
If we do, we could just do a pressure test with a vise. Oh, that ain't gonna be good footage. We need to crash some cars. Yeah, I'm in. I like it.
Shane Dawson
Okay. Okay, guys. We have talked about the pop star hair color theory and it is just getting even wilder. So many pop stars changing their hair color, finding a color, going with it, getting more attention, getting more fame. So we've talked about that, but there's a new one on the horizon. This is the pop star shoe conspiracy. Don't buzz me.
Jared
Oh no, I'm interested. I bet Sabrina Carpenter's a front runner.
Shane Dawson
One cool thing about all the major pop girls is that you can tell exactly who they are just by looking at the kind of shoes they've got on. Taylor Swift has become known for wearing those sparkly colors. Custom Louboutin boots with the signature red bottoms during the Heiress tours. Ariana Grande is easily recognized for the high heeled knee high boots that she would wear during her live performances. Olivia Rodrigo has made Doc Martens a staple in her wardrobe, wearing them during her stage performances as well as in her day to day life. Sabrina Carpenter has definitely become known for the chunky platform boots she wears whenever she's performing on stage. I'm not exactly sure what this particular style of boots is called, but Tate McRae is definitely a quiz for it. Wait, this is crazy. Okay, listen, I was talent alert. I was halfway there. I was like, okay, but they all kind of whatever. But the Tay McCrae one. So she's trying to start a thing with those shoes. What the fuck are those?
Jared
I mean, yeah, every girl's gotta have a signature Shoe. I think it's obvious if you're gonna be touring, which is how they make their living now, you have to have an iconic look.
Shane Dawson
Does Tate have a crazy hair color?
Jared
No.
Shane Dawson
See, she's only halfway there.
Jared
She's doing just.
Shane Dawson
No shout out. Hey, we love you, but, like, what the fuck are those? They look crazy, right?
Chris
Yeah.
Shane Dawson
Are the. Are girls wearing.
Jared
She can really dance, though, that girl. So good for her.
Shane Dawson
Yeah. All right, that's very interesting. So I'm gonna be on the lookout. Next time the pop girly comes around, I'm gonna be looking at the shoes.
Ryland Adams
You have identifiable shoes.
Shane Dawson
I do. Yeah.
Ryland Adams
You're like Gucci. You're like.
Jared
They're his lenses.
Shane Dawson
I see the balencies. They're identifiable.
Ryland Adams
I don't know. To me they are.
Shane Dawson
Thanks.
Spencer
I would say crazy, like insane. Crocs are also unidentifiable.
Shane Dawson
Shoe of shame. Oh, yeah. Yes. Post Malone. Isn't he a croc boy? Yeah, yeah, he thought about it. Okay, this next one is so fun. Get ready. I mean, this next one is really scary. There is a new app and it is called M Audio. And what this app does is it takes a video of you and it guesses what it thinks you sound like, and it'll recreate your voice based on your looks and uses, science and AI and all these things to figure out what you actually sound like. So is gay face real? We'll see.
Ryland Adams
So this is what you wanted, that video?
Shane Dawson
Yeah. So we asked you guys before the show to send us videos in of you just talking about whatever for 20 seconds. Spencer put it into the system and it spit out videos of all of us with our voices that match our looks.
Jared
Did you mute the clips before you submitted the clips?
Spencer
Yeah, you gotta mute it.
Shane Dawson
You gotta mute it. But also, it doesn't do English. It does. Yeah.
Spencer
It's just the tone of the voice. It's not real words.
Shane Dawson
It's like, simple. So shadow. I got this idea from corridor crew. If you're not subscribed, check them out. I love that channel. I made it over there.
Spencer
Okay, who do you guys want to see first?
Shane Dawson
I want to see you.
Spencer
All right, so this is mine.
Shane Dawson
I have all this. Have a joyous fellow.
Spencer
Wow, that was actually really good.
Shane Dawson
That wasn't bad.
Spencer
I tried to do some crazy faces to see what it would do.
Shane Dawson
I was gonna say, I think he thinks you're German.
Spencer
I could probably convince people there's. I'm, like, from another country.
Shane Dawson
I want your name. I want to hear Jared's.
Spencer
Jared.
Shane Dawson
All Right.
Spencer
With just four people. It makes you sound, like, European.
Shane Dawson
A little higher. A little higher. I like that it's a little higher.
Ryland Adams
Than you are, but it's not like worlds of apart.
Shane Dawson
Also, you should start a tik tok in your car. A lot of people do like, in their car.
Jared
Okay.
Chris
I got a good car for it. I got a good car for that.
Shane Dawson
You do. All right. All right, let's see. Ry if I'm super and my Avery.
Jared
Cy amp Joe so k sleep go sword dance.
Shane Dawson
What?
Jared
I am so butcher.
Shane Dawson
Yeah, fucking right. AI.
Jared
I am so.
Chris
But don't you have, like, a straight guy voice that you did at one point or like, your telecasting voice?
Ryland Adams
Oh, it's.
Chris
Oh, that didn't even sound like that.
Jared
My tone was serious in that video. Shane was filming me, and he was like, just talk. And I was like, hey, like. So maybe if I would have been a little more animated, it would have.
Shane Dawson
Been a little more me.
Ryland Adams
That did feel the most wrong.
Shane Dawson
That was very wrong.
Spencer
All right, Chris.
Shane Dawson
Watch Chris be so gay. It's like, yes, Diva bad.
Spencer
It says that those words.
Jared
His is the only one in English.
Shane Dawson
Yes. Mama boot sleigh. Hello. That sounds like you.
Ryland Adams
Does it?
Shane Dawson
You was linked in without that.
Spencer
One.
Shane Dawson
That sounds like.
Chris
Wow.
Ryland Adams
It's like Russian minion me.
Shane Dawson
That's iconic.
Jared
Pretty good.
Shane Dawson
Whoa. That was good art. So so far, that's. That's the winner.
Spencer
Pretty good. All right, Shane, you're the.
Ryland Adams
Oh, no Final.
Shane Dawson
Okay. Sort of rap if you ever reach that point. What was that? Rylan, would you that person?
Jared
You're a redhead.
Spencer
Not nothing to do with anything.
Ryland Adams
Wait, can I hear it once more?
Shane Dawson
Well, you know, I have red hair says, oh, friend.
Spencer
I just sorted her activity there.
Shane Dawson
Right? Stop.
Chris
Like, you're like, hey, guys, it's Jake, you guys. Why? It sounds like it's Jake. You guys come on down or something.
Shane Dawson
So for that, this Jake, guys.
Spencer
This Jake.
Chris
Jake, guys.
Shane Dawson
Jake. I look like my name's Jake?
Jared
Wow, you look good.
Shane Dawson
Wait, you like that voice better than mine?
Jared
I'm really into him.
Shane Dawson
Oh, so now I need to talk like this. Deeper, deeper. Oh, no. And like Dracula. So now need to talk like these guys.
Spencer
Maybe not.
Shane Dawson
Well, that was fun. That was scary. Maybe AI's not taking. Yeah, no buzzes so far. I feel confident.
Ryland Adams
Oh, I forgot about the buzz.
Shane Dawson
Good. Guys, I have a little scale here. You know why? Because Chipotle never stops, baby. They never stop. There's a new Chipotle theory that you guys have been emailing in like crazy, crazy I actually saw this last time we filmed an episode, and I was like, oh, should we do this? And Spencer's like, oh, I don't know. And I was like, oh, it's not really that viral. Maybe people really know about it. Literally, it has gone so viral. Have you guys heard about the theory that Chipotle will give you less food if you have a woman's name?
Ryland Adams
Yes.
Shane Dawson
When sexist.
Chris
Does it stop?
Shane Dawson
Should women start putting a man's name on everything now? I think so. The other day, I posted a video about how I put a man's name on my Chipotle order, and they definitely gave me more food than normal. So I got the exact same order from Chipotle with a girly name.
Felicia
My name.
Shane Dawson
And with a man's name.
Chris
It's fraud.
Shane Dawson
Ladies first. We're starting with mine.
Spencer
Well, don't say that, because we did it too.
Shane Dawson
So that's Emily, Joy. That's the girls. Okay. And so this is for Andrew. Let's see. I can't tell.
Spencer
Yeah, me neither.
Shane Dawson
That's weird. I don't know about you, but that also looks a lot more full. Does it? Hold on, hold on. When she put them next to each other, that does look more full. Okay, that does look more full. And her makeup is a slay. Okay, so she tried this. Went viral. Everybody's talking about it, freaking out about it. So Spencer went undercover as a woman. She went in a way big.
Spencer
Yeah, I want full outfit, just over full drag.
Shane Dawson
That's the. That's the evolution of this theory. Okay, so we have a man's order and a woman's order. So here we have an order from Isabella. Let's see how much Isabella weighs. 31.8. Okay. 31.8. That's Isabella.
Spencer
What unit are we in?
Shane Dawson
I don't know.
Spencer
31.8.
Chris
Okay, just under two pounds.
Shane Dawson
And now here is Spencer. 31.8. Right. It's crazy how fast I forgot. And Spencer is. This episode is brought to you by Factor. Optimize your nutrition this year with factor America's number one ready to eat meal service. Factor's fresh. Never frozen meals are dietitian approved. Ready to eat. In just two minutes, choose from 40 weekly options across eight dietary preferences like calorie smart, protein plus, and keto. Eat smarter at factor meals.com listen50 and use code listen50 for 50% off plus free shipping on your first box. Factor meals.com listen50 code listen50 t's and c's apply.
Chris
I can smell it.
Shane Dawson
33.2. No way.
Jared
It's a man's world.
Ryland Adams
Wow.
Jared
That's pretty crazy, though.
Spencer
That's a good.
Shane Dawson
That is great. That actually worked.
Spencer
Yeah, that actually did work.
Shane Dawson
We're not sanctionable. Totally sexist. We don't want a lawsuit. But should we try a gay man's name?
Ryland Adams
What name?
Shane Dawson
What is the gayest name?
Chris
Yeah, I think Matt is actually historically the most common gay name.
Shane Dawson
Really?
Jared
I don't know. I'm gonna fact check.
Shane Dawson
I think if you know a mat in your life, they are gay. Tito.
Spencer
Yeah, there's a lot of.
Shane Dawson
Yeah, Tony.
Spencer
The most Tony could be either gay or Italian. Or gay.
Jared
Italian. I know a gay Tony.
Ryland Adams
Same, same, but different.
Shane Dawson
Wow. Well, theory confirmed.
Jared
Oh, my God.
Ryland Adams
What?
Jared
The best example I can give is Bruce, which is historically a strong stereotyped gay name.
Shane Dawson
What? Your dad's name?
Ryland Adams
Jenner?
Jared
Like, for the Incredible Hulk to get a TV show, according to Stan Lee, they had to call him David Banner instead of Bruce because Bruce is associated with being gay.
Shane Dawson
What?
Jared
This is a Reddit thread.
Shane Dawson
The Hulk is a game icon. Okay, have you guys heard about this new product that's sweeping the nation? It's called a Nubbin. A what? This product. Well, let me just show you a demo. Play game. Oh. Oh, whoa. Yes. So it's a little piece that you put on your temple, and it can control your brain.
Jared
It makes you numb.
Shane Dawson
It's like the next evolution of the neural link. Here's another example of somebody using it. The Nubin, a sleek device pressed to the side of the head, has become TikTok's latest fixation.
Ryland Adams
This isn't real.
Shane Dawson
Once switched on, users can dive into games, chat telepathically, and some even claim to witness glimpses of the future. No screens, no phones. Everything unfolds inside your mind. Okay, so obviously it's not real. It is from Black Mirror's new season. The dark just dropped. So everybody was talking about this, and it's like, okay, obviously it's not real. It's kind of, you know, funny, whatever. But then I started thinking about it and I was like, you know, what? What if this is predictive programming? What if this is something that's going to be coming? What if this will happen in the future? Then I started thinking, I wonder if things from Black Mirror from, like, you know, eight years ago, whenever the show came out, I wonder if things from the show have come true. So then I started looking into it and, oh, my God, so many things from this show have now happened. Really? And are things that people don't even question. So let me show you some examples of things that Black Mirror has truly predicted about our future. So. Which by the way, means this could happen. Neuralink is something that now there are multiple people with neural links in their brains right now, just out in the world. Oh, this is very similar to that.
Jared
We're not far off from this.
Shane Dawson
I don't think so at all. Okay, so we'll start slow. In an episode called Crocodile, there was a self driving pizza delivery car. Well, meet Pizza Hut's newest invention, their self driving pizza delivery car. Which by the way, is crazy. Taking away jobs from people.
Spencer
I know, I know.
Shane Dawson
So that's something that they're working on. Okay.
Spencer
Oh, yeah. Domino's also has its own. They're like, they like tested different neighborhoods where it's like. It's like Waymo. You know what I mean? They just drive a pizza Cartier.
Shane Dawson
What?
Spencer
And it's just a Domino's delivery car.
Shane Dawson
Really?
Spencer
Yeah.
Shane Dawson
That's insane.
Spencer
I know.
Shane Dawson
Is like, hi, your Dominoes is here. What wa inst up your phone number. I hate this. I like that. Ew. Wow. Okay, can I just say, we went to a grocery store, maybe it was like a year ago, and they were trying out their new AI.
Jared
Lot of grocery stores are unrolling.
Shane Dawson
Oh yeah, they suck. And I hate them. And I went on a full rant in the store and I was like, this sucks. Every time I put an item in the cart, it was like, beep, beep. Try again. Beep, beep. We don't know. And I was like, you AI. And then. But. And the cart was so heavy. And then at the end, a lady walked up to us, she's like, hi, I'm doing a survey. How did you enjoy the new cart? And I was like, did you make this cart? She's like, well, I didn't make it. I said, okay, I hated it. It sucked.
Jared
He complained about it for like a week.
Shane Dawson
For a week.
Jared
Okay. Never use it again. Why are you so scarred by this experience?
Shane Dawson
I hated it, okay. I hate the future. Okay, here's another prediction. So in an episode called Metalhead, they were robot dogs. Let me show an example. Oh my God. Oh my God. Go, go. Okay, so killer robot dogs, right? Well, now they fucking made them. Hi, I'm Russell and this is Spot. So you've probably seen this robot before. Maybe hauling a truck or dancing to Bruno Mars, Uptown Funk. It's the first of this generation of semi autonomous four legged robots. And it does a lot more than just make videos for The Internet. For about a month now, Boston Dynamics has been putting spot to work leasing units out to industry partners and seeing how this kind of robot holds up in the real world.
Jared
Great.
Shane Dawson
What?
Ryland Adams
Are we sure?
Spencer
Yeah. Have you not seen those videos of, like, people kicking them and stuff like that? Like, this company makes these, like, robot.
Shane Dawson
Dogs and they have robot police dogs now. Have you seen the video? What? It's happening. All being predicted. All happening. This one is crazy. So in an episode called Hang the dj, there was a whole storyline about AI AI assistants going on virtual dates with other AI assistants so that you didn't have to actually go on the date yourself. You could just send your AI assistant, find your match super easy. You don't have to waste time. Well, this is a real clip of a CEO of a dating company. This is real that I'm about to show you right now.
Spencer
Bumbles. That's it.
Shane Dawson
It's Bumble.
Spencer
Yes, The CEO Bumble.
Shane Dawson
Oh, my God. Our focus with AI is to help create more healthy and equitable relations. And that also starts with yourself. How can we actually teach you how to date? How can we help you show up in a better way? So give me an example. Okay, so, for example, you could, in the near future, be talking to your AI dating concierge, and you could share your insecurities. What? I just came out of a breakup. I have commitment issues. And it could help you train yourself into a better way of thinking about yourself. And then it could give you productive tips for communicating with other people. If you want to get really out there, there is a world where your dating concierge could go and date for you. With other dating concierge. No, no, truly. And then you don't have to talk to 600 people and all of San Francisco for you say, these are the three people you really ought to meet. What? Stop.
Jared
Kind of cool.
Ryland Adams
And the beginning of the of this was therapy. It was like literally being a therapist for you.
Shane Dawson
Just tell AI all your insecurities and all your darkest feelings and everything wrong with you, because that's not crazy. Okay, but I will AI go date another AI and have a literal replica of yourself dating a bunch of people that you have no control over. You. You're not telling them what to say. This AI is telling them what to say. And now you're connecting with someone, and then you meet them in the real world. What the fuck is happening? Sorry. How are you going to stand up for this?
Jared
I'm just saying we only have so long on this planet, and if it can Find your. If you want to be somebody that's in a relationship or you want to have kids on a certain timeline, it's like, if this efficiently works and starts bringing people like these three people, one of them will be your soulmate. You can date those three people instead of spending months and months and months starting and stopping pointless conversations with strangers on the Internet. Internet.
Spencer
Every. Every AI thing we bring up, Rylan's like, I love it.
Shane Dawson
If it's. He doesn't even use it. That's the thing. Rylan does not use AI. He. I was using Chat GPT for something, for a video. And Riley goes, it's an app.
Jared
I don't know how to.
Shane Dawson
He doesn't even know what it is. Doesn't even know what it is. Still calls it Chat gbt. Doesn't even know.
Jared
No, I have no idea.
Chris
I don't think the AIs would talk to each other either. I think it would be like, such fast computing. It would be, like, right within one second. Because I think computers are able to compute, like, 10,000 years of data information.
Jared
Like, if I have an hour heart to heart with my AI, and then it can link me with somebody else who's had an hour heart to heart.
Spencer
They don't have a heart.
Jared
Then we're an actual man.
Shane Dawson
What are we doing here? What are we doing?
Jared
We're in relationships. We're having a great time.
Chris
People just need to go outside.
Shane Dawson
Go outside.
Jared
We met on Bumble.
Shane Dawson
I know. Real people. People. But now what? You say, oh, remember our first moment? Oh, no, I don't. Because it was our AI assistants meeting each other. That's insane. Okay. All right. This isn't the only thing they predicted. I'm gonna show you a clip from one of the episodes. And. Well, I'm just gonna show you this clip. I know he's dead, but I can sign you up to something.
Ryland Adams
I see this one.
Spencer
Yeah.
Shane Dawson
You speak to him. And don't worry, you won't even have to do anything. I'll just assign. You click the link and you talk to it. It mimics him. They read through all the things they've ever said online. The more it has, the more it's him. So how am I sounding?
Jared
You sound just like him.
Ryland Adams
This might sound a bit gravy.
Shane Dawson
So these were called grief bots.
Ryland Adams
That episode's so sad and messed up.
Shane Dawson
So this was an episode about somebody using a grief bot to deal with the death of their loved one? Sounds very, very sad. Something that we should probably, probably never do. Oh, wait, no, this is an article.
Felicia
From the New York Times this week about. Right, as the title says, using AI.
Shane Dawson
To talk to the dead.
Felicia
It's about two companies, one called Hereafter AI and the other Story File that.
Shane Dawson
Use collected data from people to create either chatbots or to be able to.
Felicia
Essentially act as somebody who has died.
Shane Dawson
Why? For some reason, it's grieving that to me, listen, that's horrible. Losing somebody close to you is horrible. I can't even think about it right now. It's so sad, but I don't think. I'm not a psychologist. I'm not a scientist, not an astronaut, not a psych.
Jared
Probably not healthy.
Shane Dawson
I don't think it's probably healthy because then you get addicted to talking to this and then you never move on and you're constantly talking. This seems like so dangerous to me.
Jared
This seems like preying on people that are in the darkest point of their life.
Chris
It definitely feels like you're not allowing them to go through the acceptance stage.
Shane Dawson
This article says that these bots are trained on the digital footprints of the dead person, including social media posts, text messages, other data. It mimics their voice, their speech patterns, their personality, everything about them.
Ryland Adams
It sounds unethical, right? Like, I don't know, it sounds wrong. I mean, I. But there are so many.
Shane Dawson
I don't know. And then obviously one of the most famous episodes of Black Mirror that I think was like eight years ago was called Nose Dive, and that was one where Bryce, Dallas, Howard. So in the episode, she's walking around and everything she looks at, she can see the scores of the people in front of her, like, how many followers they have, how many likes they get on Instagram. It's called the Media Social Social credit score.
Ryland Adams
It's like uber. But like, in real life, like, if you have a bad interaction with someone, grocery store bumped into you and was a jerk, you, like, give him a star.
Shane Dawson
Now, you might think that's crazy. I think this is gonna happen with meta glasses, with all this ar, you know, reality thing, augmented reality that they're trying to get in our glasses, and Apple vision, all that. Like, I do think five years from now that's gonna happen. You're gonna be walking around and you're gonna look at somebody, it's going to show their social media, what they post, posts, their likes, how many followers, whatever. I think companies are going to use that to their advantage. You walk in and they're like, oh, you have this many followers, I'll treat you a different way. Oh, you're Going to post about this. I'll treat you a different way.
Ryland Adams
Well, in that episode, there's like certain communities that you can only live in if you're like four stars or higher or something like that.
Chris
I think. Doesn't China have a social equity score?
Shane Dawson
So, yes, I wrote that down. I. I didn't want to missay anything. They have a social credit system and it's national credit rating and below blacklist implemented by the government of the People's Republic of China. And supposedly they use it to track you. You're evaluated for your trustworthiness and businesses use it. The government uses it.
Chris
I don't know a whole lot about it, but I do know that it's in place and it exists.
Shane Dawson
I don't know. This shit's freaking me out. I haven't actually watched the new season of Black Mirror, but I will watch it and I'm going to look for anything that I think could be predictive and talk about in a future video. Because, I mean, these things are all happening. They're all coming true. And then we're so desensitized by the time it does happen, we're like, yeah, okay.
Ryland Adams
I had a conversation with a couple friends where we were saying it's gonna get to the point to where AI kind of takes over everything.
Shane Dawson
Everything.
Ryland Adams
Yeah. And then what happens then? And one friend is like, well, it's the end of the world and we're all dead and we have no purpose. My other friend was like, well, then there won't be like a need for anyone to work and we can all just enjoy our lives and do what we want and like, live lives. Have, like, without the need to work.
Shane Dawson
Your friend Elon sounds.
Chris
And I'm like, do they grow their own food? I mean, how?
Ryland Adams
Like, AI makes the food. Everything is done by AI.
Shane Dawson
Why would AI do anything for us?
Spencer
Yeah. Yeah. Why?
Ryland Adams
This is what the positive friend believes. I don't think it's positive.
Shane Dawson
Why would we help ants, right? We don't. We kill them. Yeah, I mean, I don't. I love.
Ryland Adams
I. I think the Matrix, when they.
Jared
Break into our house, break in, they bust evil. Sorry, Ant.
Shane Dawson
Well, that's how AI is going to feel about us. They're in the way.
Jared
We're in the way.
Ryland Adams
Ryland, I thought you would be the positive one.
Shane Dawson
So why are you all. Yeah, isn't AI great, Ryland?
Jared
Well, we're in the way of them. I'm just hoping that I've fulfilled my life's purpose before. I'm in their way. What it's like, what am I going to do? How am I going to stop forces bigger than myself?
Shane Dawson
That's a great way to live. Well, speaking of Ryland just giving up, it's time. Time for a recap. My camera action. Rylan's recap is about to happen.
Jared
Ryland's recap on today's episode of the Shane Dawson podcast. I might get buzzed out of my own recap, but we'll see how this goes.
Shane Dawson
Be funny. Spencer shit his pants.
Jared
Oh, just when you thought Jared shitting his pants pants was the furthest we'd go on this podcast. Oh, Spencer has a bad piece of salmon and shits all over in public. Oh, and this wasn't just a skid mark. It was a full blown sha doobie.
Shane Dawson
Oh, I think Spencer's out on the scene.
Jared
Oh, Spencer, is that you? Is that we can smell through the tv?
Spencer
Yes, Rylan, unfortunately it is. I've loaded my pants up and I scared to go inside my apartment building because I think everyone's gonna a smeller. Back to you, Rylan.
Jared
And did you decide to put your shit filled clothes in the washing machine or did they go in the trash?
Spencer
No, I didn't put them in the build of the one building washing machine.
Shane Dawson
Oh, my God.
Spencer
Actually, I was wearing what I thought was my lucky underwear. No. Turns out, not so lucky.
Shane Dawson
Wow. Jared's a broccoli king.
Jared
Just when you thought the broccoli kids had nobody to look up to, Jared enters the chat. The broccolini queen of them all.
Chris
I'm more of a king, but, oh.
Shane Dawson
Felicia won our hearts and $1,000. I got to remember to send her that.
Jared
This week on America's Got Talent, Shane Dawson edition. Oh, what?
Shane Dawson
Farmers Got Talent. Oh, and we're digging it.
Jared
This week on.
Shane Dawson
This week.
Jared
This week on Farmers Got Talent, we all seem to be digging a le. Felicia.
Shane Dawson
Felicia, you stole my thing.
Jared
You said you didn't like it, so I took it. The catch crew seems to be digging Felicia because she just sank her teeth into a thousand dollars. Just when you thought we were the cleanest podcast on the Internet, Spencer came through with calm crapping, among other bad words that gay people don't like to be called. Spencer, not only do you shit your pants, but you offend the homosexual community. What do you have to say for yourself?
Shane Dawson
Sorry, you're forgiven.
Jared
I wonder if Hot Wheels daddy has.
Ryland Adams
Something else to add off camera. Spencer called me a meat smoker.
Jared
What?
Spencer
That was in private.
Jared
What does that even mean?
Spencer
It means exactly what it is. Him and his boyfriend made a bunch of barbecue last night.
Chris
Or would it be like he's smoking the meat pipe?
Jared
Oh, okay. Well, just when you got guys thought Stanley was going under, you thought her popularity was fading. The girls weren't tick tocking about her just as much anymore. She comes in hot and saves another life.
Chris
Circumstantial evidence. We really don't know.
Jared
In my favorite rabbit hole of the entire Shane Dawson podcast history, the space rabbit hole was my favorite. We learned how to poop, we learned how to pee, we learned how to sleep, and we learned that there is no up and there is no down. But we still don't know how to have sex in space. Who's gonna create the first space porno? It's us. All right, well, there you guys have it for this episode of the Shane Dawson Podcast. I hope you enjoyed this ride. Make sure you subscribe and follow all of us. Everybody's linked in the description section below. And shop your Shane Dawson merch@shane dawsonmerch.com. we love you, you very much. And we'll see you right here in two weeks on the Shane Dawson Podcast.
Shane Dawson
Wow. That was really good. That was good. The buzzers helped you pressure Simons. All right, guys, go. Hopefully you enjoyed whatever the hell this was. Space Edition. Really? Oh, my God. I got his space costumes on Amazon.
Jared
Perfect for the thumbnail.
Shane Dawson
For the thumbnail. So get ready to float babies. Oh, there you guys go. I hope you guys had fun with us. We have fun with you. Say next time. Bye. We're going to float a wing, Sam.
The Shane Dawson Podcast - Episode: Mind Control Conspiracy Theories!
Release Date: May 25, 2025
Overview
In the "Mind Control Conspiracy Theories!" episode of The Shane Dawson Podcast, Shane Dawson and his close friends dive deep into a myriad of intriguing topics, blending personal anecdotes with speculative discussions about technology, conspiracy theories, and pop culture phenomena. This long-form summary encapsulates the key points, discussions, insights, and conclusions drawn throughout the episode, providing a comprehensive guide for listeners and those who missed the live conversation.
1. Black Mirror Predictions Becoming Reality
Shane Dawson kicks off the episode by pondering the uncanny ability of the TV show Black Mirror to predict future technological advancements and societal changes.
He delves into specific instances where Black Mirror’s fictional narratives mirror real-world developments, sparking a conversation about the show's impact on current technology.
2. Spencer's Public Mishap
Transitioning to lighter, personal stories, Spencer shares an embarrassing incident that became a recurring joke among the group.
Spencer recounts accidentally soiling himself at a grocery store, leading to humorous exchanges about handling such situations discreetly.
The group offers playful advice on managing unexpected accidents, highlighting their camaraderie and ability to laugh at themselves.
3. Talent Competition: "Farmer's Got Talent"
Shane introduces a new segment inspired by popular talent shows, aimed at showcasing the unique skills of their listeners.
Contestants present a variety of talents, from Samantha's ability to spit on command to Felicia’s balisong knife flipping. The judges—Shane, Jared, Chris, Ryland, and Spencer—provide candid feedback, blending humor with genuine appreciation for the participants' efforts.
Felicia is declared the winner of this round, earning $1,000 and advancing to the next stage of the competition.
4. Rabbit Hole: Space and Technology Conspiracies
The group delves into a deep discussion about space exploration and the technological advancements that eerily align with Black Mirror’s predictions.
They explore the realities of living in zero gravity, the logistics of space travel, and the psychological effects on astronauts.
The conversation expands to include Blue Origin’s space missions, debating whether these endeavors are genuine or part of a larger, undisclosed plan by wealthy elites.
The hosts scrutinize various aspects of space travel, including the physical challenges faced by astronauts and the ethical implications of space colonization.
5. Conspiracy Corner: Blue Origin and Space Missions
Transitioning into their designated conspiracy segment, the hosts discuss theories surrounding Blue Origin’s spaceflights.
They debate the authenticity of recent space missions, citing observable anomalies and inconsistencies that fuel speculation about the true nature of these endeavors.
The conversation highlights public skepticism and the allure of conspiracy theories in explaining complex technological advancements.
6. Chipotle’s Name-Based Ordering Discrimination
Another conspiracy theory discussed revolves around Chipotle's alleged discriminatory practices based on customers' names.
The hosts experiment with ordering techniques, comparing the weight of orders placed under traditionally male versus female names, leading to amusing observations about customer service and bias.
This segment sparks a broader discussion on gender bias in the service industry and the validity of such claims.
7. AI Voice Recreation: The "M Audio" App
Exploring advancements in artificial intelligence, the hosts showcase an app that recreates voices based on visual input, raising questions about privacy and the future of personal interactions.
They test the app with their own videos, evaluating the accuracy and implications of such technology in everyday use.
The segment underscores the potential and pitfalls of AI in replicating human speech and personality traits.
8. Recap and Closing Remarks
In the final segment, the hosts recap the episode's highlights, celebrate Felicia’s victory in the talent competition, and share lingering thoughts on the discussed conspiracy theories.
They also conclude with humorous banter about upcoming topics and tease future episodes, ensuring listeners remain engaged and eager for more content.
Notable Quotes
Shane Dawson [00:00]: “Babbel is the science backed language learning app that actually works...”
Spencer [06:16]: “I was pretty far from my house, and I just... it was a disaster.”
Jared [22:53]: “But I love you.”
Shane Dawson [35:27]: “I fell down such an insane rabbit hole recently about space.”
Shane Dawson [51:38]: “Because I watched it happen.”
Shane Dawson [65:03]: “Have you heard about the theory that Chipotle will give you less food if you have a woman's name?”
Shane Dawson [61:09]: “There's a new app and it is called M Audio. And what this app does is it takes a video of you and it guesses what it thinks you sound like...”
Shane Dawson [84:43]: “So get ready to float babies.”
Conclusion
The "Mind Control Conspiracy Theories!" episode adeptly blends humor, personal stories, and speculative discussions, offering listeners a multifaceted exploration of how fiction intersects with reality. From talent competitions and embarrassing moments to deep dives into space exploration and AI advancements, Shane Dawson and his co-hosts create an engaging narrative that entertains while provoking thoughtful consideration of the world’s rapid technological changes and the conspiracies that often accompany them.
For those who haven't tuned in, this episode provides a rich tapestry of conversations that highlight the hosts' chemistry, their ability to tackle diverse topics, and their knack for making complex subjects accessible and entertaining.
Listen to the Episode: The Shane Dawson Podcast - Mind Control Conspiracy Theories!
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