The Shane Dawson Podcast
Episode: Panda Express Conspiracy Theories & HUGE ANNOUNCEMENTS!
Date: November 9, 2025
Host: Shane Dawson
Co-Hosts: Ryland, Chris, Jared, Spencer
Overview
This "Just Boys" edition episode of The Shane Dawson Podcast is a rollicking mix of personal updates, wild food conspiracies (with a focus on Panda Express' orange chicken), and huge new announcements about the team’s creative pursuits. The group navigates everything from diet woes and straight bar adventures to the potential dangers of AI, viral social media hoaxes, and, of course, the Panda Express conspiracy. They keep the conversation personal, irreverently funny, and occasionally a little unhinged.
Main Segments & Key Insights
1. Cozy Vibes and Boys Only Energy (00:26–06:29)
- The show opens with the crew joking about “just boys” energy, gym shorts, and the need for a cozy, relaxed episode after a more hectic and glam previous week.
- Jared discusses his intense dieting and recent two-day water fast:
- "I just got off a two day water fast. So you're seeing me at my probably thinnest in like, at least five years." (04:08)
- "Now I'm just eating to eat. I don't live to eat. I eat to live." (05:03)
- The crew discuss the challenges of eating out while on strict diets and the joy (or lack thereof) found in food.
2. Personal Stories & Bits: Straight Bars and Camping Misadventures (06:29–10:55)
- Chris reflects on attending a straight sports bar with a friend, feeling out of place amid “intense, masculine energy.”
- "It was very, like, intense, masculine energy that I wasn't used to. Everyone was like, hi." (07:13)
- "I'm anxious already. And I go in there and there's another, like, drunk guy with a 49ers jersey on. And he, like, hits me while I'm taking a piss. And he's like, hey, bro, we gotta pull out a win, huh?" (07:56)
- Spencer describes camping with friends, dabbling in mushrooms, and having to dig a “pooping hole”—much to everyone’s dismay.
- "We did have to go. There was no facilities, so we had to go, like, dig a hole and poop in holes." (09:36)
3. HUGE Announcement: DIY TV Pilot "Cancelled" (11:05–17:15)
- Shane reveals he's funding and producing a new pilot episode called CANCELLED, largely thanks to Patreon support.
- "My goal for this, obviously, is to pitch it and to have somebody buy it and have a show. Worst case scenario, it goes on, you know, my YouTube channel…" (16:20)
- Everyone on the crew (and parts of Shane’s family) has roles in the pilot, described as a blend between Hacks and American Horror Story. The behind-the-scenes docuseries will be shared on Patreon.
- "It’s an hour long, and it’s my pitch for a TV show... The show is called Cancel, and it’s about an A list starlet named Rachel, and she gets canceled the night before the Oscars, and it’s kind of her life unraveling..." (12:02)
- "You have to bring realness, groundedness, sensitivity. You're talking about a dog that might pass away. I said it's you, babes." – Shane on Chris' role (14:00)
4. Podcast/Set Updates (18:05–20:30)
- Shane shares plans for redesigning the podcast set—complete with new plants, books, and special accessories relevant to each co-host’s personality.
- "Let me show you guys a few images that I've created...a hanging plant, which I bought...I bought books, colorful books. A bookshelf. So that's what I'm thinking for mine." (18:06)
- There’s a running gag about being an “ally” (even to straight people) and hiding secret straightness via accessories.
5. Majority Rules Game: Food & Friend Shenanigans (23:24–45:13)
- The group plays a round of “Majority Rules,” answering questions about who is most likely to do various things.
- “Who is most likely to photocopy their own dick?” (23:42)
- Rylan is the near-unanimous answer, met with anecdotes and the joking admission, “If I photocopied my balls, it would just look like a turkey.” – Shane (24:30)
- Who would steal food at the office, get evicted for a noise complaint, or eat someone first after a plane crash? (general theme: mayhem and self-deprecation)
- “Which fast food chain is most likely to give you diarrhea?”: Predominant answer is Taco Bell, followed by a discussion on beans and lard.
- "My choice was Chipotle, though." – Chris (29:03)
- "All the best beans. Lotta lard." – Chris (29:57)
- Saddest restaurant to eat at alone? Suggestions include Cheesecake Factory and Little Caesars, both met with collective laughter and disbelief.
- “Who is most likely to photocopy their own dick?” (23:42)
6. Conspiracy Corner & Creepy Consumer Realities (46:24–58:31)
- Segment opens with quick-fire updates:
- Cedar Point: The infamous Wildcat roller coaster's old location is now home to Siren’s Curse—another allegedly haunted and malfunctioning ride. (48:46)
- Discount Store Drug Find: Shane relates an online post about someone discovering a bag of meth inside bedding from a discount store, sparking a discussion of retail horror stories.
- "A pipe and a small bag of white crystal substance. No, the authorities were contacted immediately..." (50:07)
- Food Conspiracies:
- The group dives into the concept that most restaurants get their food from the giant distributor, Cisco, essentially making menu “choice” an illusion.
- "This company has pre packaged frozen food, but they also have like napkins and plates...what they really specialize in is like prepackaged frozen food for restaurants." (63:53)
- Shane’s Postmates deep dive reveals how restaurants create multiple virtual brands from the same kitchen, all using Cisco stock photos and food: “I find the address...I search that specific address in Postmates, and I find wing zone, 9.6 miles away. Nathan's famous 9.6 miles away…” (67:58)
- Huge laughter at the notion of reviewing 15 brands of identical jalapeño poppers.
- The group dives into the concept that most restaurants get their food from the giant distributor, Cisco, essentially making menu “choice” an illusion.
- Panda Express Orange Chicken Conspiracy:
- Viral rumors claim Panda Express changed their orange chicken recipe, possibly outsourcing to a mass food distributor like Cisco, destroying the original taste.
- "Panda Express has officially ruined orange chicken. Once the greatest fast food culinary invention, they’ve changed the recipe." – (70:21)
- Group taste test: "It tastes different to me. It tastes more like American." – Shane (73:07)
- "This is mushy, which I'm not used to—it doesn't feel right." – Chris (73:25)
- Viral rumors claim Panda Express changed their orange chicken recipe, possibly outsourcing to a mass food distributor like Cisco, destroying the original taste.
- Taylor Swift Conspiracies:
- The team discusses wild Swiftie theories, like her album colors correlating with new iPhone releases and embedding eerie pop culture references in her songs.
7. Viral AI & Social Media Mayhem (58:31–62:51)
- A hilarious moment involves a viral video of a cat using a toilet, later revealed to be AI-generated:
- "That is an AI clip from the new app Sora. Literally like TikTok, except it is all AI generated content." (59:31)
- Jake Paul “coming out as gay” in a viral video turns out to be an AI deepfake—Jake admits he’s actually invested in the technology behind it.
- “He actually came out and said...he is an investor in OpenAI and that he is actually the mastermind behind all of these viral SORA videos.” (62:13)
- Discussion on the future of media: Are virtual experiences on the rise, or is Gen Z rebelling by seeking authentic, in-person moments?
Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments
- “I don’t live to eat. I eat to live.” – Jared (05:03)
- “It was very, like, intense, masculine energy that I wasn’t used to...” – Chris on the straight bar (07:13)
- “The show is called Cancel, and it’s about an A-list starlet named Rachel, and she gets canceled the night before the Oscars...” – Shane (12:02)
- “All the best beans. Lotta lard.” – Chris (29:57)
- “If I photocopied my balls, it would just look like a turkey.” – Shane (24:30)
- “It tastes more like chicken nuggets, but not like...orange chicken.” – Shane (73:07)
- “Are you in the Four Gang or the Niner Gang?” – Shane, riffing in the recap (76:08)
- “Jake Paul’s not gay. But he plays one in AI.” – Shane (76:24)
Timestamps for Key Segments
- 00:26 – Show start, “Just Boys” banter and vibes
- 04:08 – Jared on water fasting
- 07:13 – Chris’ straight sports bar experience
- 11:05 – CANCELLED pilot announcement
- 18:05 – Podcast set/design updates
- 23:24 – “Majority Rules” game (personal/funny questions)
- 29:00 – The “diarrhea” fast food debate
- 46:24 – Conspiracy Corner intro & Cedar Point update
- 50:07 – Discount store meth discovery story
- 63:53 – Cisco & restaurant food conspiracies
- 70:21 – Panda Express orange chicken recipe theory & taste test
- 59:31 & 62:13 – AI deepfakes (cat video & Jake Paul)
Recap Segment (74:25–77:42)
Ryland delivers a tongue-in-cheek recap, touching on everyone’s stories—Jared’s diet, Chris’ straight bar adventure, Spencer’s wild camping, Jake Paul’s AI drama, the Panda Express conspiracy, and a nod to their ambitious TV pilot project.
Final Thoughts
This episode blends lighthearted ribbing with sharp observations about food, pop culture, and digital weirdness. The outrageous food conspiracies, personal stories, and infectious chemistry among the hosts make it a fun and fast-paced listen—even when they’re just “hanging out as boys.” Shane’s transparency about new ventures and love of the bizarre is as front-and-center as ever.
Memorable Cliffhanger:
“This theory is about Panda Express. People are now saying that Panda Express’s orange chicken is no longer edible because they changed the recipe.” (70:14)
Missed this episode? You’ll walk away in the loop—and maybe rethink your next order of orange chicken.
