True Crime Conspiracy Theories!

Summary

The Shane Dawson Podcast: "True Crime Conspiracy Theories!" – Detailed Summary

Release Date: December 22, 2024

Join Shane Dawson and his close-knit group of friends as they delve into the intriguing world of true crime and conspiracy theories in this captivating episode. Filled with engaging discussions, humorous segments, and a chilling true crime story, this episode offers something for every listener. Below is a comprehensive summary capturing all the key points, insightful conversations, and memorable moments from the episode.

---

1. Christmas Festivities and Secret Santa

The episode kicks off with the hosts sharing their experiences preparing for the holidays. Shane expresses his enthusiasm despite waking up early and indulging in a few Diet Cokes:

Shane Dawson [01:31]: "I woke up at 7am I am at peak. Three Diet Cokes in, like. It's fucking crazy."

The group discusses their unique and sometimes mismatched Christmas outfits, leading to light-hearted teasing and laughter. Colby introduces the concept of their Secret Santa gift exchange, setting the stage for a fun and competitive segment.

---

2. Artwork Reveal

Colby, an accomplished photographer and graphic artist, reveals the new podcast artwork crafted for the upcoming season. The artwork features the hosts clinging to each other as they fall into a hole, symbolizing the unpredictable adventures ahead.

Shane Dawson [09:10]: "Love this picture so much. Like, right after you took it and I looked at your camera, I was like, it's. That's the one."

The group admires the intricate details of the artwork, praising Colby's talent and creativity. They encourage listeners to share their thoughts and support by rating the podcast on various platforms.

---

3. Christmas Mafia Game

The hosts transition into an exhilarating game of Christmas Mafia, a role-playing game where participants assume the roles of Mafia members and guardian angels. The game unfolds with suspense as Chris's character is eliminated early on.

Shane Dawson [35:00]: "Are you gay?"

As the game progresses, accusations fly among the hosts, leading to dramatic eliminations. The tension peaks when suspicion falls on Sandy and Ryland, culminating in a thrilling conclusion where Ryland is revealed as the Mafia.

Shane Dawson [38:58]: "You've killed Santa on Christmas. Oh, my God. Gay Santa."

The game not only provides entertainment but also showcases the dynamic and playful relationships among the hosts.

---

4. Top Five Conspiracy Theories of 2024

Shane introduces the segment by announcing a countdown of the top five conspiracy theories of the year, as voted by their Instagram group chat followers.

Honorable Mention: Bohemian Grove

The discussion begins with Bohemian Grove, an exclusive gathering of global elites rumored to engage in secretive rituals and power plots.

Ryland Adams [46:37]: "It's like all of like the top powers basically in the world that all get together in the middle of the forest and they have this like giant, giant owl statue."

5. Zombie Fungus Inspired by "The Last of Us"

The fifth theory explores the terrifying possibility of a real-life zombie fungus mirroring the fictional pathogen from the popular game and TV series.

Shane Dawson [47:27]: "The zombie fungus was number five voted by you guys. This has been something that we've been talking about for, I think three years now."

4. Olive Garden Breadsticks Reuse Theory

The fourth theory posits that Olive Garden reuses breadsticks by collecting leftovers, reheating them, and serving them anew, a notion humorously debunked by the hosts.

Shane Dawson [48:08]: "But it was still a fun time. Spencer licked a breadstick, which people talk to you about in public."

3. Celebrity Hair Color Changes Linked to Superstardom

This theory suggests that celebrities change their hair color to boost their careers, linking vibrant hairstyles to sudden rises in popularity.

Shane Dawson [50:22]: "The theory is, if a celebrity changes their hair to a certain color, that is what shoots them to superstardom."

2. AI Taking Over with "Old Man Steve"

The second spot discusses the unsettling advancements in AI, exemplified by "Old Man Steve," a seemingly real influencer who may be an AI creation.

Shane Dawson [52:36]: "Old Man Steve, shout out. He has an Instagram. A tik tok. This is him. He is not AI."

1. Stanley Cup Scam Theory

Topping the list is the Stanley Cup conspiracy, which claims that the iconic trophy is a scam, surviving various tests and being impervious to damage.

Shane Dawson [56:07]: "So the Stanley cup craze was number one. Which, honestly, I agree. Although, I will say really didn't fix me at all."

---

5. True Crime Story: The Santa Claus Killer

In a gripping true crime narrative, Sandy recounts the harrowing tale of Bruce Jeffrey Prado, an engineer who spirals into violence after personal and financial turmoil.

Story Highlights:

• Background: Bruce marries Sylvia Ortega, but their marriage deteriorates after Sylvia discovers Bruce's past and his neglected child.
• Descent into Violence: Facing financial ruin, Bruce purchases firearms and dresses as Santa Claus to perpetrate a mass shooting on Christmas Eve.
• Aftermath: The chaos ensues as Bruce commits multiple murders before ultimately taking his own life amidst a house fire and intricate booby traps.

Sandy [64:15]: "He ends up knocking on the door... he shoots her twice in the face."

The story concludes with the community's devastation and Sylvia's transformation into a gun control activist, determined to prevent such tragedies.

Sandy [70:48]: "She’s a gun control activist, and she's been at most of the events of school shootings, like talking to the news and telling them how important it is about gun control."

---

6. Year-End Recap

As the episode winds down, the hosts reflect on the year's highlights, personal milestones, and memorable moments. Despite playful jabs and humorous banter, the recap underscores the bond among the hosts and their shared experiences.

Shane Dawson [73:22]: "How much were the Shrek? Is the price tag on the Shrek slippers?"

They celebrate successful segments like Secret Santa and the gripping true crime story, looking forward to future episodes with enthusiasm and anticipation.

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Notable Quotes

• Shane Dawson [01:31]: "I woke up at 7am I am at peak. Three Diet Cokes in, like. It's fucking crazy."
• Sandy [64:15]: "He ends up knocking on the door... he shoots her twice in the face."
• Shane Dawson [38:58]: "You've killed Santa on Christmas. Oh, my God. Gay Santa."
• Shane Dawson [56:07]: "So the Stanley cup craze was number one. Which, honestly, I agree."

---

Conclusion

"The Shane Dawson Podcast: True Crime Conspiracy Theories!" successfully melds humor, suspense, and insightful discussion, offering listeners a multifaceted experience. From festive games and artistic unveilings to deep dives into perplexing conspiracy theories and a haunting true crime story, this episode stands out as a testament to the podcast's engaging and diverse content.

Whether you're a long-time fan or new to the podcast, this episode promises to captivate your interest and leave you eagerly anticipating what's to come in the next season.

Transcript

[Shane Dawson]

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[Ryland Adams]

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[Shane Dawson]

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[Ryland Adams]

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[Colby]

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[Ryland Adams]

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[Colby]

Or your money back.

[Ryland Adams]

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[Shane Dawson]

With LifeLock. Save up to 40% your first year.

[Ryland Adams]

Visit LifeLock.com podcast terms apply.

[Sandy]

He ends up going to get a tailored Santa suit.

[Shane Dawson]

What?

[Sandy]

Okay. He pulls out like, an air compressor that he somehow made into a torch. He lights up the whole house on fire after that.

[Lizzy]

As Santa.

[Sandy]

As Santa Claus.

[Shane Dawson]

That is one of the craziest things I've ever heard. Hey, welcome back to Whatever the hell this is Christmas edition. Oh, yes.

[Chris]

Except only half of the cast showed up in Christmas.

[Shane Dawson]

Okay. We were busy. We did a lot of things for Thanksgiving, so I didn't have time to go on websites and get everybody's clothes. Yes. Half of us are dressed like Christmas. Some of us are dressed like stripper Santa, and one of us is wearing a shirt with a word on it that none of us know what it means.

[Chris]

Yeah.

[Shane Dawson]

What is this?

[Colby]

I don't.

[Ryland Adams]

This is not my shirt.

[Chris]

Watch it be so offensive.

[Ryland Adams]

It's like you called me. What?

[Shane Dawson]

Oh, my God. Okay. Yes. First of all, we have so much to talk about. The energy is going to be insane in this episode. I Woke up at 7am I am at peak.

[Chris]

It's really a burden to my life.

[Shane Dawson]

Three Diet Cokes in, like. It's fucking crazy. Santa came in the house today fuming.

[Chris]

This was nuts.

[Sandy]

I was feeling hot, very passionate. And like Jared mentioned, it's because I was thinking about things on the way over here. So he was trying to talk to me and I said, I need to not talk right now. So when I came in, I was heated. Yeah.

[Lizzy]

It was like a balloon that just needed to release air. She had so much talking that she wanted to do. She just let it all out when she got here. And you guys got it.

[Sandy]

I did warn Jared. I said, once I go in there, I'm going to tell them. I'm going to tell them the story she told everybody. And keep in mind, I had already told, like, my whole family.

[Lizzy]

So individually.

[Sandy]

Individually.

[Jared]

Every woman loves a pro store.

[Chris]

You're in a pro store. Yeah, that's.

[Shane Dawson]

Hold on. We're going to get to that. Sandy, get ready, because you're going to have to tell that story to everybody again because it was really good. But before we get to that. We have a special guest today. Everybody welcome. Colby.

[Ryland Adams]

Okay, this is crazy.

[Shane Dawson]

Okay, first of all, let me explain if you don't already know. Colby. We've talked about him on the podcast. He's been around his vlogs. He's been all over the podcast Instagram, So Colby is my friend and an amazing photographer and, like, graphic artist. You have made the last podcast cover that we did. We just did a photo shoot. And today you're gonna reveal our new.

[Ryland Adams]

Podcast art for next season three baby.

[Shane Dawson]

Exciting. And you said that you were gonna come Santa. Down the boots house chimney suite.

[Ryland Adams]

Okay. I would like to say it's.

[Lizzy]

How did I understand?

[Ryland Adams]

Holiday themed. My version of holiday themed and your version of holiday themed are two entirely different.

[Shane Dawson]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Ryland Adams]

You went for, like, suburban mom core, and I showed up as, like, your kid would be scared to say that if I showed up.

[Shane Dawson]

Although you are technically our children's first vision of Santa Claus.

[Ryland Adams]

I love that's iconic and scary, and they loved it.

[Shane Dawson]

It was very exciting.

[Ryland Adams]

I broke in leave a couple gifts.

[Shane Dawson]

You did.

[Ryland Adams]

There weren't cookies, and we do need to discuss that later. But for right now, you also didn't.

[Chris]

Come through the chimney, so I have beef with you too.

[Shane Dawson]

Wow. Okay, so we have so much planned for today. Obviously, we're going to get to the artwork and all that stuff. We have the secret Santa.

[Chris]

That has been a drama, real drama for my life.

[Colby]

Everyone got a gift. Everyone has.

[Shane Dawson]

We do.

[Colby]

Yeah.

[Shane Dawson]

Oh, this is big.

[Colby]

Yeah.

[Shane Dawson]

So, okay, so pretty soon, what's your Santa name? I feel like we tried to think.

[Ryland Adams]

There were a couple of good ones.

[Shane Dawson]

There was Santa Claus.

[Ryland Adams]

Santa Claus.

[Shane Dawson]

Santa Claus is going to be giving us our gifts later, and we're all going to have to guess who we got, by the way, I can't believe I didn't do this yet. We have backstory with Colby. Okay, so, Colby, do you want to explain how you met me and Jared for the first time? And then I will show picture evidence that you don't want me to show.

[Ryland Adams]

Okay, to be fair, the first time we met and I brought this story up the whole time on the first time we shot, I was like, I'm not going to show him this. This is embarrassing. And then somehow I dill was like, hey, you want to see something crazy? But this is for you at home.

[Chris]

Yeah.

[Ryland Adams]

Anything is possible. I waited in line, like, six and a half hours at Vidcon to take our very first photo in that crazy Anaheim convention center of chaos.

[Shane Dawson]

Wow.

[Ryland Adams]

And, like, the Real tea is I used to have the vacation song poster posted in my bedroom, period.

[Sandy]

Wow.

[Ryland Adams]

Like, this is a long time coming. But yeah, this photo is.

[Shane Dawson]

Okay, here is me and Colby at the. Look at. Oh, my God. That is. First of all, I would trust you with my money.

[Lizzy]

I'm going to say is that you and your first agent.

[Chris]

It's like, I'm going to take you places.

[Ryland Adams]

Shane, it's Rob.

[Shane Dawson]

Okay, so that is. You know what's so crazy? I actually literally remember this so vividly. And I think it's because the universe knew that we would be in each other's lives again at some point, because this was over 10 years ago. And when you showed this to me, I was like, right back into that moment. Then there's another picture. So Jared, you also met Jared. Was this the same Vidcon?

[Ryland Adams]

Oh, yeah.

[Shane Dawson]

Oh, my gosh. Jared looks exactly the same. That's insane.

[Colby]

What the hell?

[Ryland Adams]

It's crazy. Like, I think there are so many opportunities, but the fact that we've gotten to here is just mind blowing.

[Shane Dawson]

The fact that you're in my house dressed as gay Santa is fucking insane.

[Ryland Adams]

And I knew. I knew in that moment. Yeah.

[Shane Dawson]

Okay, Sandy, you got. Everybody in the comments is always like, sandy and Jared are goals. Their goals are always holding hands. Are they holding hands today? They are.

[Chris]

No, no, he's. He's caressing her behind the scenes.

[Shane Dawson]

They're always being so cute. Not today. You guys came in blazing. Sandy's pissed. Today was different fights with Jared and Sandy. Uh.

[Sandy]

Oh, yes. So here's the story, which kind of makes me look bad a little bit, but mostly him. So Jared. Well, we've sharing socks.

[Chris]

And by sharing, she means stealing Jared.

[Sandy]

Yes, yes. And so for those who don't know, Jared actually likes to pull up his socks like he's in the 90s. He's always done this. And the other day he told me that he doesn't think we should share socks anymore because his socks. Because his socks no longer stay up. I was like, wait, are you saying that my calves are so big they're stretching out your socks? Oh, I know, I know. This is triggering me. And then he says to me, well, I just think our bodies are built differently. Can you believe it?

[Lizzy]

Of course they are.

[Shane Dawson]

Yeah.

[Jared]

And that's why her calf's got 50,000 steps in someone else's calf.

[Sandy]

And I'm sorry that my family's just super blessed with very muscular calves. You know, when was that ever a bad thing?

[Shane Dawson]

Tell him, Sandy.

[Sandy]

So then I tell him the Other day, I feel like. I just feel. You know, I was feeling down about my weight and how I look. And I told him, I said, man, I just feel like I'm really gaining weight, and I just feel ugly. And he says to me, no, my love, you're so beautiful. And that's it. And so then I say to him, all right, did you just call me fat?

[Chris]

And not to side with Jared, but this does sound like a shame trap.

[Sandy]

No. Then he says to me, well, we both have, you know, talked about that we've been gaining weight. Can you believe that?

[Shane Dawson]

I got to go.

[Sandy]

He was just digging his own grave right there and then.

[Shane Dawson]

Not on Christmas.

[Ryland Adams]

I'm sweating.

[Sandy]

And that was it.

[Ryland Adams]

Sandy, let's lean.

[Sandy]

I'm not mad about it. You know, I'm. I'm strong.

[Lizzy]

She's beautiful.

[Shane Dawson]

Who cares about calves? My legs are. What do you call them?

[Chris]

What? No, you call them.

[Ryland Adams]

What do you call them on me?

[Shane Dawson]

I mentioned one time that they look like pork chops.

[Jared]

He always said, my pork chop.

[Shane Dawson]

Ever since then, that's all he calls his pork chops.

[Chris]

He's like. I was like, you gave yourself that name. I guess it's different.

[Shane Dawson]

Yeah, but you shouldn't be using it. You should be saying, oh, you mean your chicken leg.

[Chris]

Nobody wants like. Like, sturdy upper half.

[Shane Dawson]

Okay, Sandy, hear me. This is what he says to me. He goes. He goes, I like your big legs.

[Chris]

No, when. He goes. When he's acting insecure about them skinny.

[Shane Dawson]

Legs, like, I like your big legs.

[Chris]

But Shane's legs aren't fat. They're muscular. There's a difference.

[Sandy]

Nicer word I use other than big.

[Jared]

I'll back you up on that.

[Chris]

So if it's an actual compliment, I don't.

[Colby]

I'm stressed.

[Jared]

It's sexy.

[Shane Dawson]

This is a lot.

[Sandy]

See, what I tell Jared is I always tell him that I love his long, beautiful legs. I don't say, like, big or small. I just say, long, beautiful legs.

[Lizzy]

And then you say, I look like a frog.

[Sandy]

Well, I love.

[Lizzy]

Okay, enough.

[Colby]

That's Draw the line.

[Sandy]

That's for another story to tell.

[Shane Dawson]

Well, let's move on. Okay. Should we do the big artwork reveal? Yes. Okay, here we go. Are you guys ready to see our new itunes, Spotify, whatever else podcast apps out there? Artwork for the next year for the 2025 podcast. Here it is. Whoa. Colby, you killed. Grabbing onto each other, holding on for dear life as we fall in a hole.

[Chris]

How did you do that?

[Shane Dawson]

Can I just say, did you Photoshop our eyes?

[Ryland Adams]

No, that's the original photo.

[Chris]

We're all delivering the exact same, like, case.

[Shane Dawson]

Love this picture so much. Like, right after you took it and I looked at your camera, I was like, it's. That's the one. Because we all look so intense. Okay. Really take it in. Look at the arms, look at the hands. Look at Rylan gripping on dispenser. Like, help me.

[Chris]

Yeah. It all came together very nice.

[Lizzy]

And I'm just kind of only touching Rylan because I need to maybe possibly get out in front of you guys in case someone comes up.

[Chris]

It feels like I'm, like, the first one into your culture.

[Shane Dawson]

Well, Jared looks like he's like, don't worry, guys. We're going into the rabbit hole. I got you. So cute.

[Chris]

Spencer's like, what am I doing here?

[Colby]

Yeah.

[Shane Dawson]

Oh, wait, that's Big Spencer's an addition.

[Chris]

Oh.

[Shane Dawson]

Oh, yeah. Okay, so that's the new artwork. I love it so much. Let us know what you think. Please go to itunes or Spotify or whatever and, like, rate it. Is that how you make it?

[Ryland Adams]

Yeah.

[Shane Dawson]

And send Colby some love for doing such a good job. Such a good job. Amazing job. Yeah. Okay, so let's look at a couple of the other pictures that I thought were highlights from the photo shoot that we did with Colby. This one we have Jared chicken fishb. Jared eating a chicken big Mac.

[Chris]

Wow. McDonald's should pay for the rights to that.

[Shane Dawson]

It's so good.

[Lizzy]

After talking about gaining weight and feeling fat, this is definitely, like, high level motivation.

[Ryland Adams]

If I could easily inside on the.

[Chris]

Day, Shane's like, oh, she was eating the chicken Big Mac. Get over here with it.

[Shane Dawson]

He's like, it's gone.

[Lizzy]

Thanks, Ryland. Really bringing me back to the moment of eating the chicken Big Mac.

[Sandy]

That was his last bite, actually, of.

[Chris]

That really is good.

[Shane Dawson]

I think he looks snatched. I think you look.

[Chris]

We should sell that to the stock photo websites. I think people would use it.

[Ryland Adams]

No, we just photoshopped the ad and then leave it inside of a McDonald's and see how long it takes for someone to realize that it's not.

[Colby]

Ooh, that's good.

[Jared]

I love that.

[Lizzy]

Oh, I think it's a great photo.

[Shane Dawson]

Well, speaking of great photos, here is Jared and Sandy, which I thought was so cute, so natural, but I was like, I want a cute one of me and you just being fun and cute. And then we tried to take some, and all of them are just me and Riley getting mad at you.

[Colby]

Yeah, your face is.

[Shane Dawson]

You look handsome, though. But it was just us fighting, and then literally he was just like, well, what do you want from me? Yeah, never mind.

[Chris]

I hate photo shoot days.

[Shane Dawson]

Why do you hate them so much?

[Chris]

I, I, I hate still photos. They're my nightmare.

[Ryland Adams]

There are two types of people you either are really good looking on, like video camera and not in photo.

[Shane Dawson]

Where are you going with this?

[Ryland Adams]

Let's make it three types of universally looks great all the time, but no, it's a, it's a no for sure. It's a real thing, though.

[Sandy]

But I mean, your photos with the trash can, they look so good.

[Shane Dawson]

Yeah, we'll throw some of those up. We also have photos of Ryland getting out of a trash can. There's one of Rylan running me over with his car, which was a choice fantasy. I think we'd be kidding. What?

[Colby]

Spicy?

[Chris]

No, I'm kidding. My life would not go around without Shane. I am not wishing that. Into the world, please.

[Shane Dawson]

Cop. Wow, very feisty episode.

[Lizzy]

Little preview of the sip.

[Shane Dawson]

Check it out. Sip Mess.

[Chris]

Make sure you guys tune in.

[Shane Dawson]

Sip Mess.

[Chris]

It's us yelling.

[Lizzy]

Is that a thing? Sip.

[Chris]

We're actually currently in a feud with a radio show right now, so.

[Ryland Adams]

Yeah, that's real.

[Colby]

That's good Lord.

[Chris]

No big deal.

[Shane Dawson]

What are you talking about?

[Jared]

The radio won't stop talking shit about us.

[Chris]

Yeah, we're like going back and forth with the radio show.

[Shane Dawson]

Is this real?

[Chris]

Yes, this is real.

[Shane Dawson]

Wait, why have you not told me about this?

[Jared]

Yeah, why have you not told him about this?

[Chris]

Well, if you would listen to my podcast.

[Shane Dawson]

A real radio show.

[Jared]

A real radio show.

[Chris]

Wait, like Ali and Alex or something?

[Shane Dawson]

What did I say?

[Chris]

I took it as a compliment.

[Shane Dawson]

This is huge.

[Chris]

I took a couple.

[Jared]

They said that we were, like, not good at what we do.

[Chris]

They were reacting to our podcast and this girl's like, yeah, I put them on to fall asleep.

[Shane Dawson]

Vanessa listens to this while she falls asleep.

[Chris]

And he's like, well, let me listen. And the guy's listening and he's like, they're not even doing anything. And she's like, exactly the point.

[Lizzy]

It sounds like they're trying to set.

[Shane Dawson]

Up a podcast but don't know how microphones work.

[Sandy]

Exactly what they're doing.

[Chris]

And then allegedly, they've reacted to us. Reacting because he's on the radio.

[Sandy]

We don't know how to find you.

[Shane Dawson]

You guys have to go on next.

[Ryland Adams]

Week and fight them.

[Lizzy]

Podcast is going to be talked on KROCK now.

[Chris]

No, that was the last time you turned on the radio.

[Shane Dawson]

Well, every, like everybody in LA, every.

[Chris]

80 year old in LA, my step down.

[Sandy]

Cat Williams once said, if in beginning of the summer, you got two haters, you got to figure out how to get 16 haters by the end of it. Yes. You keep doing it.

[Chris]

Honestly, I'm flattered. And it's the most fun beef that I've ever had.

[Shane Dawson]

Wow. How come you haven't told me about this?

[Chris]

I don't know.

[Ryland Adams]

I.

[Chris]

And Lizzy kept telling me about it, and I didn't believe her because one of her friends was listening, and it's a friend.

[Jared]

Well, they didn't even say the name of our podcast. They just started talking shit and didn't even plug the show.

[Shane Dawson]

What the name of their show is is. Is so irrelevant to this conversation. Why would they react to a podcast?

[Chris]

I don't know.

[Jared]

They were talking about things that put.

[Lizzy]

Them to sleep, listening to random monotonous podcasts.

[Colby]

As you go to sleep, this bitch.

[Jared]

Comes to work and says, this podcast, which shall remain nameless because we're not going to plug them because I'm a nasty wench.

[Chris]

They go on and listen and react, and it's great. I'm sorry to make this about me, but if you want that kind of fun, seriously, come on over.

[Shane Dawson]

Okay. Okay. Should we get started with the Secret Santa?

[Jared]

So exciting.

[Ryland Adams]

I love that Santa's on a budget and everything is in a trash bag.

[Shane Dawson]

Well, that's because we have Santa's sack.

[Ryland Adams]

But our first one is for Rylan.

[Shane Dawson]

I don't know how it is. Maybe just chuck it or no. Oh, God.

[Sandy]

Oh, my God.

[Shane Dawson]

Wow. Santa got skills. Okay.

[Sandy]

And nothing fell out.

[Shane Dawson]

Santa, throw your boot up so they can see the boot.

[Chris]

The wrapping paper, the wrapping paper alone feels more than the budget.

[Shane Dawson]

It does. Look at that bow.

[Chris]

I am very excited.

[Shane Dawson]

I'm so excited.

[Chris]

Oh, my gosh.

[Shane Dawson]

What is it?

[Chris]

Shane is gonna lose his mind to go with your reindeer.

[Shane Dawson]

Oh, God, that's so cute.

[Chris]

Wow.

[Jared]

Santa hats for the headrest.

[Shane Dawson]

I will say the reindeer ears on the cybertruck fell off and broke, and now it's just a clown nose.

[Ryland Adams]

So that's.

[Chris]

I'll have to order another one. This is nice, though. Cause it goes on the back and, like, the back too. And the rear facing car seats. The boys will love looking at those.

[Shane Dawson]

That is. That's a good one.

[Chris]

Oh, there's more.

[Shane Dawson]

Oh, my gosh.

[Chris]

Joshua Tree. Now I've narrowed it down to two people. This could be.

[Shane Dawson]

That is cute.

[Chris]

There's no way this was under $20.

[Shane Dawson]

Who knows?

[Sandy]

Who knows who? Got it.

[Shane Dawson]

Okay, time to guess. Who do you think Gave it to.

[Chris]

Well, there's more.

[Jared]

Chris, that's crazy.

[Chris]

Hydrating cleansing wipes from Sephora. I did see Sandy got the 5 for 5 deal there. So I'm wondering if this. This might have been in that.

[Sandy]

Somebody's been watching our vlogmas.

[Chris]

Oh, my gosh. And Dr. Sasquatch. Oh, my God. I've been using their deodorant from.

[Ryland Adams]

I love their soap.

[Chris]

Wow.

[Shane Dawson]

Oh, there's a bucket.

[Chris]

Oh, my gosh, a bucket.

[Sandy]

Oh, the bucket might say something too.

[Chris]

Welcome to the magic of Christmas. This is incredible.

[Shane Dawson]

That's crazy that he saw. Welcome.

[Jared]

I don't think he can read.

[Chris]

There's no way this hoodie was.

[Shane Dawson]

Who do you think got it?

[Chris]

Sandy.

[Shane Dawson]

All right, who's next?

[Ryland Adams]

A multi dimensional queen, AKA Sandy.

[Shane Dawson]

A little compliment on the box. Okay. Thrashed up.

[Chris]

Yeah, the wrapping's a little bad, but.

[Shane Dawson]

The paper is beautiful. I wonder where they got that.

[Sandy]

Oh, my gosh, look, I got ears.

[Shane Dawson]

Take them out.

[Sandy]

Let me see.

[Lizzy]

Are those the Oogie Boogie ones?

[Ryland Adams]

A little Disney one?

[Sandy]

No, it's maleficent. They're glittery and billet. Disney Villains Cookbook.

[Shane Dawson]

Oh.

[Sandy]

Thank you, guys.

[Shane Dawson]

Wow.

[Sandy]

I think it's between you and Ryland. I'm gonna say you wrong.

[Shane Dawson]

Don't say who it was. Maybe that's the game. Who's next?

[Ryland Adams]

I look a lot different on this wrapping paper, but for Shane.

[Shane Dawson]

Wait. Oh, okay, so this is to me. They obviously wrote the wrong name and scratched it out, which is interesting. Oh, that is calculated Interesting. Which one should I open? Oh, yeah. I don't know. I'm gonna do this one.

[Chris]

All right, let's see what it is.

[Shane Dawson]

What? Pranks. Little hands.

[Ryland Adams]

I love those.

[Shane Dawson]

Which I already have little hands. So thank you for making me think I could go even smaller. Okay, these are cute. These are.

[Colby]

Oh, those are really fun.

[Ryland Adams]

Like Tiktoks for videos.

[Shane Dawson]

Yes. Okay. Okay, let's see what number two is.

[Sandy]

You can give Rylan a back massage.

[Shane Dawson]

Somebody went in the budget. Okay, number two is. Oh, this is cute. Little SpongeBob. Little figurines. And he has his underwear on his head. And he's holding a rainbow, which is pretty good. Okay, let me think I'm gonna get. Oh, to me, it's between Jared and Chris, but I think it was Jared. Yeah, it was you, Jared. Well, because. Let me explain.

[Lizzy]

Just so you know, it was just barely in budget.

[Shane Dawson]

Barely.

[Lizzy]

And that thing was originally 40 bucks.

[Shane Dawson]

Oh. Shane goes, oh, my God, you're Rylan.

[Lizzy]

But look, that's you walking at night with Your underwear on your head.

[Shane Dawson]

Yeah.

[Lizzy]

And then that's Ryland being your cheerleader.

[Shane Dawson]

You can do it.

[Lizzy]

And then I just thought this was fun because I only had about $3 left in budget because I thought we took that serious. It was in budget.

[Shane Dawson]

Jared's a good gift giver, by the way. He always shocks with his thoughtfulness. Oh. All right, who's next?

[Ryland Adams]

Oh, this is easy. Merry Christmas.

[Shane Dawson]

Thank you so much, Santa. That is really cute.

[Ryland Adams]

The wrapping paper and. Oh, my God.

[Chris]

It's kind of a moment.

[Shane Dawson]

Wow.

[Ryland Adams]

Come on. Beauty guru.

[Shane Dawson]

Spencer is a beauty guru.

[Ryland Adams]

He clips it up.

[Colby]

Oh, Shrek slippers.

[Chris]

Oh, yeah.

[Sandy]

His face lit up. That's so cute.

[Colby]

I love Shrek.

[Ryland Adams]

I feel like you would wear those unironically.

[Colby]

I do too.

[Shane Dawson]

That's so gentle of you. Yeah.

[Colby]

Well, I think I do know who these came from because they were here when I got here. And I know who Ryland had, so I think it was Shane.

[Shane Dawson]

It was me.

[Colby]

Thank you so much. These are great.

[Shane Dawson]

Wow.

[Ryland Adams]

The wrapping. Oh, my God.

[Chris]

Wow. They are cute.

[Shane Dawson]

Okay, who's next?

[Chris]

Oh, it's big.

[Ryland Adams]

Oh, yeah. Oh, for Lizzy. I'm not gonna Chuck this one. It's. It's kind of heavy.

[Jared]

Oh, we love to hear it.

[Ryland Adams]

That's like that gift you get that you shake a little bit before you open it.

[Jared]

Should I shake it?

[Shane Dawson]

Oh, there's two parts.

[Ryland Adams]

Oh, there's two.

[Chris]

What?

[Shane Dawson]

Wow.

[Chris]

Whoever got you was rich.

[Ryland Adams]

Come on. Part two.

[Jared]

I think I know who it is already.

[Chris]

The wrapping paper is incredible.

[Jared]

And it smells like Chris.

[Shane Dawson]

Oh, it smell. What does that mean? What does it smell like?

[Jared]

You know what that means. Chris always smells good.

[Chris]

Chris does always smell good.

[Shane Dawson]

I thought that was going somewhere different.

[Jared]

The dog. Oh, it's a matching for me and my dog. I love my dog. I love my human mug and bottle.

[Shane Dawson]

That's cute. That is cute. That is very cute.

[Jared]

I love that.

[Chris]

Which dog gets it?

[Ryland Adams]

They share Sharpie s at the end of it.

[Sandy]

That's so thoughtful.

[Shane Dawson]

Okay.

[Chris]

It's from Sandy. Wow. Wow.

[Jared]

Gloss, floating frame. Wait, what is it? It's my baby and his best friends.

[Sandy]

That is so cute.

[Jared]

He's literally pooping in this picture. And it's one of my favorite pictures of him ever, because he looks like.

[Sandy]

I'm okay, but he's so cute.

[Shane Dawson]

That is really cute.

[Jared]

I love this so much.

[Chris]

And this is over budget.

[Jared]

This is definitely over budget.

[Chris]

Chris, that's gorgeous.

[Ryland Adams]

Definitely not me.

[Shane Dawson]

It's Sandy.

[Jared]

No, it's Chris.

[Shane Dawson]

Oh, and the wrapping was good. I tried so Hard.

[Jared]

I love it. Thank you so much.

[Colby]

Wow.

[Lizzy]

Wow.

[Chris]

You should have saved that. For real, Chris.

[Shane Dawson]

For real Christmas.

[Jared]

I was gonna say, Chris, don't do anything else ever. I love this so much.

[Shane Dawson]

Okay, who's next?

[Ryland Adams]

Next one. Oh, Chris.

[Shane Dawson]

Ooh, that's also heavy.

[Chris]

Whoa.

[Ryland Adams]

It's a really heavy gift. Y'all bought some bulky gifts.

[Chris]

Look how cute this is.

[Colby]

Wow.

[Ryland Adams]

That is cute.

[Colby]

Whoa.

[Ryland Adams]

Okay. Rainbow Y. Peruvian.

[Sandy]

Y.

[Ryland Adams]

Is it Peruviany?

[Shane Dawson]

It is Peruviany.

[Sandy]

The cookbook. Wow.

[Ryland Adams]

I love this because no one in my family ever taught me to make anything ever.

[Shane Dawson]

So maybe now I can. It's a gay Peru book. I love this.

[Ryland Adams]

This is really cute. I really needed to learn how to cook.

[Shane Dawson]

Who do you think it's from?

[Ryland Adams]

Sandy?

[Sandy]

No.

[Shane Dawson]

No.

[Sandy]

Oh, guess again.

[Shane Dawson]

Who's next?

[Chris]

Wait, is it over?

[Colby]

One more.

[Ryland Adams]

No, wait. One more.

[Shane Dawson]

Oh.

[Chris]

Oh. Happy birthday.

[Shane Dawson]

Jesus. Oh.

[Chris]

To Jared. I forgot.

[Colby]

Okay.

[Shane Dawson]

Nice reuse of the happy birthday bag.

[Ryland Adams]

Budget Friendly.

[Lizzy]

In the budget, several things.

[Chris]

Oh.

[Lizzy]

A 711 koozie.

[Shane Dawson]

Did you know that parents rank financial literacy as the number one most difficult life skill to teach? Meet Greenlight, the debit card and money app for families with greenlight, you can send money to kids instantly, set up chores automate allowance, and keep an eye on your kids spending. With real time notifications, kids learn to earn, save and spend wisely. And parents can rest easy knowing their kids are learning about money. With guardrails in place. Sign up for Greenlight [e-mail] Spotify. What is that?

[Lizzy]

It might be a pretty, like, tense beanie.

[Colby]

It might be from 7 11.

[Lizzy]

Yeah, it's like a bald eagle.

[Shane Dawson]

It's a bald eagle. Bald eagle beanie. I love that.

[Sandy]

I think this might be 7 11.

[Colby]

It might be a theme in front of wear all of a sudden.

[Shane Dawson]

Wait, it looks good with the jacket.

[Lizzy]

Oh, does it?

[Shane Dawson]

Over the earphones. It's a buy.

[Chris]

Yeah, that is a buy.

[Lizzy]

A big gummy, a big goat. It's all 7 11.

[Shane Dawson]

Can we all taste that?

[Lizzy]

A gift card. It could be up to a hundred dollars.

[Chris]

I think there's an amount on the back 20.

[Lizzy]

So this is over budget. Over budget? I can't accept it. Unfortunately, I'm liking what I'm seeing.

[Shane Dawson]

Oh, there's more? Yeah. Somebody went crazy.

[Chris]

An iPhone, charger, sunglasses.

[Shane Dawson]

Oh, I love those.

[Jared]

Hell yeah.

[Chris]

Wow. Look, the ball.

[Jared]

There's more.

[Lizzy]

That's it.

[Shane Dawson]

Wow. All right. Who do you think gave it to you?

[Lizzy]

I'm gonna say it's either Lizzie or Spencer. I'm gonna guess Lizzy.

[Shane Dawson]

Wrong. Okay, I Know this one?

[Lizzy]

I thought it was a funny one.

[Shane Dawson]

So who was wrong, Chris?

[Chris]

I was wrong, Jared.

[Sandy]

I don't know if. Did you tell me I was wrong?

[Chris]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Shane Dawson]

Okay. Okay, Sandy. Who wants to reveal who got Sandy the cute ears?

[Jared]

It was me.

[Sandy]

Oh, man, I should have known. And I even said. You call me that.

[Jared]

Well, it's because you keep saying you want to be perceived as a multi dimensional character. So I was like, and she's in her villain era. Cause let's see the face. There it is.

[Sandy]

And I did feel like I brought it this episode.

[Jared]

You brought them a little bit for sure.

[Sandy]

Yeah.

[Shane Dawson]

Thank you, Chris. Who got Chris the gay paruba? Well, now I think it's either Ryland.

[Ryland Adams]

Or is it Right.

[Jared]

I have beef with Ryland over there.

[Shane Dawson]

I have beef too, because I picked it out.

[Chris]

Really?

[Jared]

No, that makes more sense because he gave me shit when I got him a book last year. He's like, people don't want.

[Shane Dawson]

Well, nobody wants.

[Chris]

Nobody wants a book.

[Shane Dawson]

But it's gay and.

[Chris]

Are you kidding me? Like, how could anything be more Chris?

[Shane Dawson]

But it's sitting on his coffee table. It's a pretty. Like, put it in the house.

[Jared]

Right.

[Sandy]

Am I the only one that kept within budget? Were we the only ones that kept in budget?

[Chris]

I was very close.

[Sandy]

Were you? Jared was very like, the budget.

[Jared]

Very seriously.

[Sandy]

Jared said, you better not spend more than 20 bucks because that's a budget. So I was very nervous about it.

[Colby]

I wasn't that much over budget. I'll say.

[Shane Dawson]

Yeah, I was very, very excited.

[Lizzy]

Except the gift card.

[Colby]

Wow. Yeah.

[Shane Dawson]

Wow. Well, there you guys go. That was our secret Santa. I feel bad we didn't get Colby anything.

[Ryland Adams]

Yeah, I'm Santa. This is my Christmas Santa.

[Shane Dawson]

Okay, well, we're going to take a quick little break and when we come back, something I've been waiting for all year, we're going to be playing Christmas Maf. Get ready. See you guys in a second. Hold on. Don't snow anywhere. That didn't work. Sleigh. Right there. That was better. Guys, can you believe Christmas is in three days? Or depending on when you're watching, this might be over. You know what's so weird about Christmas? The second it's over, Santa knows not to overstay his welcome. The second Christmas is over, that motherfucker back on the North Pole closes the blinds, deletes his social media. He really takes a break. Good for him. What am I talking about? Displate. Okay, don't go anywhere. Seriously. If you are looking for a gift not just a Christmas gift. This is an all year round gift. This is the perfect birthday gift, the perfect Valentine's gift, the perfect gift to yourself. Treat yourself, Treat yourself. If you guys haven't heard about displate, where have you been? We literally have a displate in the back of all of Chris's angles on the podcast for like the last three years. Displays are the one of a kind metal posters designed to capture your unique, unique passions. They literally have over 2 million designs. Disney, Marvel movies, music, our podcast, other podcasts like, okay, for example, say you're shopping for your friend. You're like, I don't know what to get. Go to display.com Shane. That was ugly. And just think about what your friend likes. I don't know. My friend likes scream. Type in scream search. Boom. There you go. Literally anything you can think of. They also have display texture, which is new Textra has 3D contours, tactile design, selective matte and gloss effects, and it also comes in a large size. I love displate because for me, growing up in a house where I was not allowed to put any holes in the wall, but displate is so easy because all you gotta do is you wipe a little part of the wall wherever you want your displate, put on the magnetic piece, snap your displate on and you can take it off super easy. Put it anywhere you want. Doesn't leave holes in the walls, doesn't strip paint. It's really, really smart and I love it. So if you want to check out displate, please do go to displate.com shane and use code grower at checkout and you can get up to 36% off of your order. That's Displate.com Shane and use code grow. Thank you so much Displate for sponsoring and please check them out. Just have fun, explore. All right, enjoy the rest of the episode. I'll see you guys later.

[Jared]

Bye.

[Shane Dawson]

Okay. Welcome back to Santa Claus's village, where all the little elves are sleeping in their beds. So excited for Santi to come tomorrow. Does Spencer the elf want to take us through our first round of Christmas mafia?

[Colby]

Okay, you guys ready to play some Christmas mafia?

[Shane Dawson]

Yes, sir. Yeah.

[Colby]

So I have all the roles in this Christmas spot.

[Shane Dawson]

A little nog.

[Colby]

A little. There might be eggnog in here. So there's gonna be a mafia and a guardian angel. So mafia's gonna kill someone? Guardian angel can save someone.

[Chris]

Only one Mafia?

[Shane Dawson]

Yeah.

[Chris]

Okay.

[Shane Dawson]

We haven't played this in a while.

[Jared]

I'm nervous.

[Shane Dawson]

Oh, my God. This is the last episode of the year.

[Chris]

It is.

[Shane Dawson]

That is sad. Yeah, this year went by really fast for me. I know it did.

[Colby]

Does everyone have their role and know their role?

[Shane Dawson]

Yes. Know your role.

[Colby]

Know your role.

[Jared]

Know your role.

[Colby]

Okay, everyone. Townspeople, go to sleep. A nice, relaxing night in Christmas Town. Mafia, please awaken. Point to who you would like to kill. Very good. Very good. Go to sleep. Guardian angel, arise. Please select the person you would like. The elf you would like to save. Very good. Very good. Please go to sleep.

[Sandy]

Cock a doodle.

[Colby]

It is a bright and beautiful Christmas morning.

[Shane Dawson]

All you beautiful little elves, run down.

[Colby]

To the tree and open the presents. But wait, someone's not here in the house you guys all share together. Someone is not here because last night.

[Chris]

Sandy, you're looking psychotic. Has psychotic energy.

[Jared]

It's just because I feel bad and guilty, even though we just keep going.

[Colby]

Funny enough. Last night, Lizzy was gonna take a walk outside. She wanted to check on the reindeer, make sure everyone was ready for the big night.

[Shane Dawson]

It's true.

[Colby]

And everything was. And it was. You went to sleep. But then Chris was like, she must have missed something. And he went back out, and the mafia had poured a bunch of water on the ground and it froze to ice. And it was on a perfect slope. And so Chris slid all the way down and there was a tree branch.

[Shane Dawson]

No.

[Colby]

Impaled to death. You guys found him impaled to death on a Christmas tree.

[Shane Dawson]

Oh.

[Colby]

Oh. And it was because of the mom. I know it's fucked up in his.

[Chris]

Christmas shirt that nobody understands.

[Colby]

But unfortunately, the guardian angel wasn't. Wasn't flying around that night.

[Ryland Adams]

So.

[Colby]

Chris, you have been killed by the Mafia.

[Ryland Adams]

I swear, I've died every time we played this game.

[Shane Dawson]

Who did it?

[Chris]

Oh, my God.

[Colby]

So now the townspeople have to figure out who was the Mafia.

[Shane Dawson]

Sandy, always.

[Chris]

She is always the most conniving in this game. She can, like, present a pretty face.

[Shane Dawson]

When she's in her villain era. She came in heated.

[Sandy]

Oh.

[Shane Dawson]

Ooh.

[Sandy]

I feel like Shane's really putting up a fight that I'm the killer.

[Chris]

Oh, yeah.

[Jared]

Kill it.

[Sandy]

Well, now I think you might be Lizzie.

[Chris]

No, she was acting.

[Jared]

Don't be dumb, Sand.

[Shane Dawson]

It's obviously shame.

[Chris]

You were acting suspicious.

[Jared]

I always feel guilty the second we do anything that has anything around.

[Shane Dawson]

Guilty.

[Chris]

I feel like you would kill Chris.

[Jared]

It is not I. Because everyone who's a town person knows that their card does not say villager. It says something else. So the fact that you said villager means you Never pulled a card out that said it.

[Shane Dawson]

Mine says villager lies mafia. It really does say villager. Spencer, did you write multiple versions of the word villager?

[Colby]

I wrote one alternate version.

[Shane Dawson]

Oh.

[Chris]

Oh, my God.

[Ryland Adams]

That's crazy.

[Colby]

Just the to make it fun.

[Chris]

My divine is out in shape is not the mock.

[Jared]

I know I may feel so crazy.

[Sandy]

When she said that. I thought I also got villager.

[Colby]

It's also funny because I know what it says on yours, and it's really funny. Not even funnier.

[Shane Dawson]

I feel broken. I feel like I don't know who I am.

[Sandy]

You really, like, meant it?

[Shane Dawson]

No. Cause I was like you.

[Jared]

I'm so sorry, Shane.

[Shane Dawson]

I love it.

[Sandy]

Okay, now I do think. Now I think it is Shane.

[Shane Dawson]

I think it's now I'm a villager.

[Jared]

No, I remove my second.

[Sandy]

Okay, who are you thinking?

[Jared]

Okay, well, now I'm thinking you, and.

[Sandy]

Now you're thinking me. You are in your villain era, my love. You're not gonna stand up for me.

[Chris]

You're multi dimensional.

[Lizzy]

Is Kobe playing?

[Shane Dawson]

He is very quiet over there in the North Pole.

[Sandy]

Did Santa go?

[Ryland Adams]

Christ, no. If today's Christmas. I was getting ready, I couldn't have done it.

[Shane Dawson]

Oh, right. No, that wasn't.

[Chris]

He woke up super early to get ready.

[Jared]

What does your card say?

[Ryland Adams]

Maybe villager, maybe something else. Maybe not.

[Jared]

Because what if a person got us something that says, but that would be.

[Ryland Adams]

Crazy if Santa's just out here slaughtering out.

[Chris]

That's a movie.

[Ryland Adams]

The next film.

[Chris]

It would be ironic.

[Colby]

All right, so what do you guys think? Are you thinking? Okay, I'm hearing Sandy and Colby is 2.

[Jared]

I would second Colby if I were nominated.

[Shane Dawson]

I'm saying Sandy because she always gets Mafia. Every time we play, somehow she gets Mafia.

[Chris]

The odds are in her favor.

[Jared]

Sandy, are you the Mafia?

[Sandy]

I think it might be Ryland.

[Chris]

Are you kidding me?

[Sandy]

Ryland is scarily, like, scary good at this game.

[Jared]

I asked you a yes or no, and I'm wondering why you.

[Sandy]

No, I am not. I am a villager.

[Shane Dawson]

Oh, shifty eyes.

[Ryland Adams]

I don't. I don't know if I believe that one.

[Shane Dawson]

Okay, so I vote Sandy. Is there any other people on the chopping block? Who?

[Colby]

Anyone, Anyone else will nominate? I guess Sandy's nominating Rylan. So.

[Shane Dawson]

So Ryland and Sandy. Anybody think Colby?

[Lizzy]

Me?

[Jared]

I. I second Colby.

[Sandy]

Oh, all set in Jared speak.

[Lizzy]

Well, I like to observe.

[Colby]

The sun is going down. It's time to vote. All in all, who. People who think Ryland is the mafia.

[Sandy]

Right here. I believe it's Ryland.

[Colby]

Okay, everyone who believes it is Colby.

[Lizzy]

Me.

[Chris]

Can I say we've all switched from Sandy to Colby.

[Colby]

Everyone who thinks it's Sandy.

[Chris]

Wait, I thought you.

[Ryland Adams]

I'm going with Sandy.

[Colby]

Okay, well, we have a tie, so let's break the tie. Okay, everyone who thinks it's Sandy, raise your hand.

[Ryland Adams]

Well, can I add one last thing? That would be gay on gay hate crime. So it was not me.

[Sandy]

And he brings that up. Seems very suspicious, playing the gay card. Interesting.

[Colby]

All right, everyone who votes for Sandy, please raise your hand.

[Chris]

Nobody's gonna flip.

[Colby]

Everyone who votes for Colby, y'all about. Oh, it's even.

[Shane Dawson]

Oh, okay. You know what?

[Chris]

I'll flip to Colby, too.

[Colby]

All right.

[Chris]

Sorry, it's not a very warm welcome.

[Shane Dawson]

What are you.

[Ryland Adams]

Get wrecked?

[Shane Dawson]

No, it's Rylan.

[Sandy]

It's Rylan.

[Colby]

Okay, okay, okay, okay.

[Jared]

Rylan, you are so good at. Sincerely, I am so sincere. I am so sorry.

[Ryland Adams]

Yeah, we'll take it up.

[Shane Dawson]

Hate crime.

[Lizzy]

Hate crime.

[Ryland Adams]

I said it was a gay.

[Shane Dawson]

Gay. You killed Santa on Christmas. Oh, my God. Gay Santa.

[Jared]

You were too cool. I didn't realize.

[Ryland Adams]

I'm just cool.

[Shane Dawson]

I get it.

[Sandy]

Sorry.

[Shane Dawson]

Are you gay?

[Ryland Adams]

Yeah.

[Shane Dawson]

Okay. We've never talked about if you're gay or not. And I'm like, wow, we've been really programmed.

[Ryland Adams]

No.

[Shane Dawson]

So you know what I mean? Like, what if he's not out?

[Ryland Adams]

I'm like, he's just like, the closet. The closet is glass doors.

[Chris]

It is glass.

[Jared]

It's like when Rylan was in the closet.

[Shane Dawson]

Yeah.

[Jared]

He. One time, Ryland came up to me. He's like, well, I'm gay.

[Chris]

And I was like, did the picture.

[Ryland Adams]

Of us not scream everything it needed to scream?

[Colby]

Okay, that was a long day. You guys killed Santa Claus. You killed gay Santa. So let's. It's time to go to sleep.

[Jared]

I'll never not feel bad about that.

[Sandy]

Rylan, if you're not dead, you're. It's you. Okay, it's you.

[Colby]

All right, all right, bedtime, everybody. Bedtime. Bedtime.

[Jared]

I'll back you on that.

[Shane Dawson]

Sandy.

[Colby]

Eyes closed.

[Sandy]

Finally.

[Jared]

If I go out, it's Ryland. I didn't mean that. I'm not a target. I just want to play.

[Colby]

Okay. Mafia. Please awaken.

[Jared]

It's Shane.

[Sandy]

I knew it.

[Colby]

Please point to who you would like to kill.

[Sandy]

I'm dead.

[Shane Dawson]

Aw.

[Colby]

Very good. Very good.

[Chris]

Interesting.

[Colby]

Guardian angel. Please awaken. Please select who you would like to save. Very good.

[Shane Dawson]

Very good. Cock a doodle doo.

[Colby]

Another beautiful morning of the North Pole.

[Chris]

Who did Sandy kill Now if it's.

[Sandy]

Not you, then it's you.

[Colby]

So last night you guys decided to go. I was gonna say trick or treating. Cause in the North Pole, they do things a little different.

[Shane Dawson]

Differently.

[Colby]

So you guys are going around from house to house trick or treating because you guys had to work all Halloween. So now it's time to party. But wait, you left someone behind. Where's Lizzy? No, you can't find her anywhere. All of a sudden, under. Under a mistletoe.

[Shane Dawson]

No, you know who it is.

[Jared]

Someone's trying to frame Ryland.

[Colby]

All of a sudden, we see Lizzy's corpse. She was strangled by Santa. A plastic Santa.

[Jared]

This is really violent.

[Colby]

And it's. Sorry, things. Things are rough up there. But Lizzy was killed and it sat on her arm from the mafia.

[Shane Dawson]

Wow.

[Ryland Adams]

So now a new tattoo.

[Shane Dawson]

And no one saved me.

[Colby]

And, yeah, the guardian angel literally resolved.

[Shane Dawson]

Who is the guardian angel? They take forever.

[Chris]

And they're not good.

[Colby]

All right, so who do you guys think?

[Shane Dawson]

Ryland. No, I felt it.

[Chris]

Sandy was going so hard after me.

[Shane Dawson]

I feel it. It's you.

[Chris]

If I was the monster.

[Shane Dawson]

He's so mad.

[Sandy]

I feel like it is Shane. And I said it. Let's just be clear. I said it from the get go. It's Shane.

[Chris]

And I was saying you were going so hard after me. I would have killed you just to.

[Sandy]

Shut you up or they wouldn't.

[Colby]

Whoa.

[Sandy]

To frame you.

[Shane Dawson]

Whoa. I'm gonna look at body language from Colby and Chris because they're dead.

[Colby]

So they had their eyes closed. They had their eyes closed.

[Shane Dawson]

I want to be surprised.

[Jared]

Why would you do that?

[Shane Dawson]

I feel like I'd ruin it.

[Ryland Adams]

It's so much more fun. A certain way. I do something.

[Colby]

I was gonna say something, but Jared's being pretty quiet.

[Chris]

Yeah, it's suspicious.

[Shane Dawson]

It's still Ryland. But Jared's looking for.

[Sandy]

Shut up.

[Lizzy]

I'm just being observant.

[Shane Dawson]

Jared, why do you take so long as guardian angel?

[Lizzy]

I don't take long.

[Chris]

And why do you get it wrong?

[Colby]

This is the least.

[Sandy]

Okay. Something is going on. Never.

[Chris]

He's never this calm.

[Shane Dawson]

He really isn't. Jared, are you the mafia?

[Lizzy]

No. I don't know.

[Chris]

He would kill Lizzie and not Sandy too.

[Shane Dawson]

Oh, I think it's Rylan.

[Sandy]

What?

[Shane Dawson]

Lizzie, you're dead. Who do you think killed you?

[Jared]

Honestly, Am I allowed to speak? Yeah, I've got a strong vibe that it was Jared because it was a calculated kill.

[Shane Dawson]

Oh.

[Jared]

It feels as though this is a frame. This is a frame job.

[Shane Dawson]

Oh, interesting.

[Jared]

But I'm also insane and wrong, usually. So take that with a grain of salt.

[Colby]

All right, I think we have our two candidates. I think.

[Shane Dawson]

Yeah.

[Colby]

And I think we're gonna use one of you guys as the deciding vote. If it's a tie. Okay, you're eyes closed. Everyone who thinks it is Jared, please raise your hand.

[Chris]

You guys are kidding me.

[Colby]

And everyone who thinks it's Ryland, please raise your hand.

[Shane Dawson]

Well, sorry, sweetie.

[Sandy]

So, I mean, I think it's Shane, but I'm gonna.

[Chris]

Well, I'll go for Shane with you.

[Sandy]

Okay. Yeah, let's go for Shane.

[Chris]

Okay.

[Colby]

Okay, everyone.

[Lizzy]

I go for Shane.

[Colby]

Wow.

[Jared]

Said the mafia.

[Shane Dawson]

Wow.

[Sandy]

What a. Rylan is just so good.

[Shane Dawson]

You guys are flopping.

[Colby]

And so I'm a villager.

[Shane Dawson]

Is that an official vote?

[Colby]

Official vote.

[Shane Dawson]

Shane would never.

[Colby]

All right, official vote. Everyone who votes for Shane, official vote.

[Chris]

Change. Now that he was just.

[Jared]

I don.

[Sandy]

Get really mind like screen right now.

[Shane Dawson]

It's Ryland. You guys are wrong.

[Colby]

So the remaining elves storm into Shane's room, beat him to death. Brutal.

[Lizzy]

Wow.

[Colby]

Brutal.

[Shane Dawson]

Brutal.

[Colby]

Crime scene. And they look everywhere and they find in his wallet, on his ID card, it says Villager.

[Sandy]

I knew it.

[Shane Dawson]

Rylan.

[Sandy]

I knew it.

[Chris]

Jared.

[Shane Dawson]

No, it's Rylan.

[Colby]

So with only three Ls in this big house, it's time to go to sleep.

[Shane Dawson]

I'm watching.

[Jared]

I am.

[Colby]

If you're dead, you are allowed to watch.

[Shane Dawson]

Hi. Hi, sweetie. No, but I'll ruin it. I'm watching. I'll give it up.

[Colby]

Asleep. Please, everyone, I have to close.

[Sandy]

Whoever is the garden, you better save me, because I knew it.

[Colby]

All right, Mafia, please wake up. Who would you like to kill? Please point. Very good.

[Shane Dawson]

Very good.

[Colby]

Please go to sleep. Guardian angel, please arise. Please select who you would like to save.

[Chris]

Who is it? Yes.

[Sandy]

Everybody's laughing.

[Colby]

Very good, very good, very good.

[Chris]

What?

[Colby]

Oh, my God. Another gorgeous morning here at the North Pole. And there's only three of you left. But wait, now there's only two of you left. Oh, where's Sandy?

[Sandy]

I knew it.

[Chris]

Jared killed his wife.

[Colby]

Well, Sandy decided to go out for a walk on the ice last night. And she walked into this funny patch and she fell right into the ocean. The mafia had caught a big hole in the ice.

[Chris]

She died, girl.

[Colby]

She died and she died, girl. With only two people left, I believe there's a. I think the mafia won, Right?

[Jared]

Yeah.

[Shane Dawson]

I knew it. I knew it. But at what cost?

[Jared]

Did I call Yoga has a friend or a husband?

[Shane Dawson]

Did I call it? I said Mafia. Guardian angel. I knew it.

[Chris]

Was convinced everyone had their hands to vote me out.

[Colby]

You were saved at the last second.

[Shane Dawson]

Did the guardian angel save himself?

[Colby]

Yeah. So the guardian angel.

[Sandy]

Wait, you saved yourself?

[Shane Dawson]

Yeah. That's genius, you guys.

[Chris]

I had to lie to my best friend too. She looked at me and she's like, there's no way you did it right? And I was like, absolutely not. And that's one of Shane and I's biggest fights too. I lied straight to his face while we were playing mafia once.

[Jared]

He's scary already with enough emotionally. Spencer Writing talent Town's idiot on my.

[Colby]

Car whose house I put one of my Town idiot.

[Jared]

Why your handwriting is so hard to read. I was like, is part of this written upside down?

[Colby]

I just thought it would be funny because someone would get it and be like, what the fuck? Town idiot.

[Chris]

This was really good for my idiot.

[Lizzy]

I love that you thought everybody said town idiot.

[Sandy]

Yeah, that's why that's my favorite part. She was like, very determined. Everybody knows it doesn't say.

[Shane Dawson]

That'S so funny. Well, Merry Christmas, everyone. Ho ho, ho. Okay, well, we're gonna take a quick little break. We're gonna have a couple fights in there.

[Jared]

I'm gonna sit somewhere else.

[Shane Dawson]

And when we come back, guys, these are some of the craziest conspiracies. Some are banned, some literally. I think YouTube might make me remove. And we also have a true crime from Sandy Me. That is insane.

[Jared]

So stick around.

[Shane Dawson]

See you in a second.

[Chris]

Stay with us.

[Shane Dawson]

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[Colby]

Bye.

[Shane Dawson]

Okay, here we go. This is our last sponsor of the year. This is crazy. This year has gone by so fast. I honestly couldn't even remember everything that happened this year. I mean, obviously had kids, they're a year old now, started the Conspiracy Van series. This is Baller dude podcast. It really was just a really fun, fulfilling, awesome year. So hopefully you guys had a good year too. And to end this year off with a flag or wait, no, I'm going to talk about Rocket Money. See what I did there? You wanted to. If you guys don't already know, I've talked about Rocket Money so many times before. I love them. They are the all in one personal finance app that helps you cancel subscriptions, subscriptions lower bills and manage your money better. So many of you guys have been using Rocket Money that you have saved so much money this year. Rocket Money has helped save its customers $740 a year when using all the app's premium features. They've also helped customers save over $500 million on canceled subscriptions alone. That is my favorite feature they do. I love everything they do, but my favorite thing they do is canceling unwanted subscriptions. Because that is something that before Rocket Money, I don't know, I would like get these apps, be paying a dollar, two, three a month for it. Forget. I'd be like, oh, I did the trial, I gotta remember to cancel that. Guess what? I don't remember. And then I'm looking at my credit card statement, I'm like, what the hell is that? Well, luckily, Rocket Money is here to swoop in and save us from all of these unwanted subscriptions. Rocket Money will show you a list of all your subscriptions. All you gotta do is tap the ones that you don't want anymore. And Rocket Money may be able to help you cancel with just a few Taps. They also help lower your bills. Rocket Money will automatically scan your bills to find savings. And with just a couple taps, Rocket Money can help negotiate your bills for you. You don't need to call customer service and wait on hold forever. Even though sometimes the songs are bangers. All you got to do is take a picture of your bill, upload it, and Rocket Money will help get you the lowest possible rate. You can also use a feature that helps you set budgets. You can create a customized budget in seconds, and the app shows you where your money is going at all times and identifies the top spending categories with insights on how you can stay in your budget better. The new year is coming, so it's a perfect time to get a fresh start, get your finances in order, and let Rocket Money help you save. So to join the over 5 million other members using Rocket Money today, go to rocketmoney.com grower or click the link in the description below to get started for free. You can also unlock even more features with premium. That's RocketMoney.com grower to get started for free. So thank you so much, Rocket Money. Thank you guys for trying it out and actually getting use out of it. And yeah, this has been just a really amazing year. So I can't wait to make more episodes next year. And yeah, I will see you guys in the new year. Bye. Hey, welcome back. Okay, I'm very excited because we are going to be doing something because it's the last episode of the year. We're going to be counting down the top five conspiracies of 2024 as voted on by you in the group chat on our Instagram. So we went to the group chat on Instagram. If you're not following us there, please follow us. And we asked what were your favorite conspiracies of the year? And you guys submitted all your ideas. Spencer took them, picked the top choices, and here they are. So before we jump in, an honorable mention didn't make the top five, but it was honorable. Is the Bohemian.

[Colby]

Bohemian.

[Lizzy]

Bohemian.

[Ryland Adams]

Bohemian Grove.

[Shane Dawson]

Yes.

[Ryland Adams]

Yes.

[Shane Dawson]

Bohemian.

[Ryland Adams]

I could go off about this forever.

[Shane Dawson]

Go off Santa.

[Ryland Adams]

Okay, so first off, it's like all of like the top powers basically in the world that all get together in the middle of the forest and they have this like giant, giant owl statue. But like, supposedly they do, like, sacrifices and they talk about, like wars and power and economy and like, everything to basically, like, control it. Kind of Illuminati ish, but like, with a giant owl. I'm in. I'm in. Yeah, I fell down that rabbit hole.

[Shane Dawson]

I love conspiracy clause. Yes. So that is an honorable mention and one of the scariest theories we've talked about. And number five, zombie fungus that inspired the hit video game and TV show the Last of Us has come to life. You might be safe if you're a human, but sadly for one, tarantula wasn't safe from the.

[Sandy]

What?

[Colby]

He was infected by this fungus and it took over his nervous system and forced him to come to this location. And then as he died, the fungus sprouted out of his body, allowing the spores to spread to another unsuspecting tarantula.

[Chris]

The way he's lounging above it.

[Shane Dawson]

The zombie fungus was number five voted by you guys. This has been something that we've been talking about for, I think three years now. And it really hit its peak this year with this zombie tarantula. So, yes, mushrooms are taking over. They're growing into animals now. It will be people soon. It is controlling the animal's brain to make them die and make them do whatever it wants them to do. Do. It's literally the last of us and it's happening. Jared, do you have any predictions for 2025 when it comes to zombie mushrooms?

[Lizzy]

I think that they're already in our brains. Shook in our brains. Okay, okay.

[Shane Dawson]

Whoa.

[Lizzy]

And I think around may stop. We're gonna start seeing a shift by July. It's an all out show. Do you really think that September cancer. There's going to be less than a thousand people left come December. We're going to have to huddle and join forces to take back over the world.

[Chris]

You know what?

[Jared]

The out of that is so toxic.

[Chris]

I think that would be the course, but AI is going to step in.

[Shane Dawson]

Okay. Number four is the Olive Garden conspiracy, which, if you don't know, we did a video this. It was our first like conspiracy van video, now that I'm thinking about it, which is honestly one of my favorite things that I think I've ever done. I love it so much. Okay, so the Olive Garden theory was that they reuse breadsticks because people leave breadsticks on the table and then the Olive Garden employee will take them to the back, reheat them, bring them back out. We tried sharpieing on them, seeing if they would get taken back. They didn't and it flopped. But it was still a fun time. Spencer licked a breadstick, which people talk to you about in public.

[Colby]

People DM me about that and they talk to me about that.

[Chris]

I would say that's one of the most popular videos that people bring up to me in person as well.

[Shane Dawson]

Really?

[Chris]

That happened just the other day?

[Shane Dawson]

Yes. So Olive Garden. People really fuck with Olive Garden.

[Colby]

Yeah, they love it.

[Shane Dawson]

Yeah. So if you guys want a sequel.

[Colby]

It'S funny because we did a Chipotle one, which was true and had a whole effect, but people didn't give a fuck about that one.

[Sandy]

I just love that. That beats this, like, fungus texture. Olive Garden.

[Jared]

That wasn't even approved.

[Shane Dawson]

Number three is the hair theory. So we talked about this multiple times. We get so many comments about this. So the theory is, if a celebrity changes their hair to a certain color, that is what shoots them to superstardom. And if you don't have an interesting hair color, you're a flop and you're never gonna hit. Let's talk Chapel Roan. Boom. Red hair. Boom. There she goes. Top of the charts. You have Sabrina Carpenter. She's been around forever, and then she does the bang thing, and she has an interesting hairstyle. Boom. Top of the charts. We have. It's a wig.

[Ryland Adams]

Have you not seen that?

[Chris]

Conspiracy theory.

[Jared]

Definitely a wig.

[Ryland Adams]

It's for sure away.

[Chris]

We were trying to figure it out. The entire concept.

[Jared]

No, no.

[Ryland Adams]

There's this whole theory going on that it's just a wig.

[Shane Dawson]

Yeah.

[Ryland Adams]

And I. I believe it. Yeah.

[Chris]

I was watching her flip that around at her concert, and she. It's put in really well.

[Ryland Adams]

It's iconic. Whatever it is. I stand Sabrina Carpenter. Love her, but I think it's awake.

[Shane Dawson]

It will not confirm. Yeah. We don't want to dispel the rumor today. I don't even know what a wig is, but I also don't know what not a wig is. Okay, first of all, conspiracy claws coming through with the theories.

[Sandy]

Well, I do think that there's a video going around with her singing the song from Wicked, and. But her hair is, like, pinned back. Right.

[Ryland Adams]

Well, I was gonna say, I think it's. Maybe it doesn't have extensions in. I think her hair is out in.

[Sandy]

That video, isn't it?

[Ryland Adams]

It just looks normal. There's nothing like. There's no wow factor.

[Shane Dawson]

Wow. Well, shout out Sabrina Carpenter and shout out all the girls with crazy hair colors. You're killing it. And wigs and wigs. Number two. The number two theory of the year is AI taking over. And this is an update on this one. Okay? So obviously, we did a whole video about it. Two videos about it AI taking over. It's happening. We're all gonna die. It's very, very scary. But there is an update. Spencer brought this to My attention, and I was floored. So, Ryland, remember the old man who I showed you the video of? And he was, like, talking about how he's a fan, and then you were like you were in love with him, and then I showed. Actually, he's not real. He was a part of this website, arcads, where you can make this fake influencer say anything you want. You remember that? Okay, well, Spencer found this.

[Old Man Steve]

Well, look who it is. It's old man Steve. And I am real. I'm not AI generated, which seems to be a new thing, which I don't buy into. I think there should be limits as to what people can do. And there's another channel here on YouTube. Excuse me. That did a video that included me and had me say things that I didn't say because it wasn't my voice. It was my. My body and everything. I. I don't know how they did that.

[Jared]

Okay, that's fake. That's scary.

[Shane Dawson]

No, that is real. So we fell down the rabbit hole. Old Man Steve, shout out. He has an Instagram. A tick tock. This is him. He is not AI.

[Chris]

They just took his likeness.

[Shane Dawson]

Let me show you some of his videos.

[Ryland Adams]

That's scary.

[Sandy]

Oh, my gosh. I love him.

[Old Man Steve]

Well, hello there. It's Magic Saturday with old man Steve. And I got this cute little monkey.

[Shane Dawson]

Isn't he cute?

[Old Man Steve]

And I'm gonna cover him up like this, and I'm gonna say, Hocus.

[Ryland Adams]

Atli docus.

[Shane Dawson]

That wasn't A.I. that was magic.

[Chris]

I love him. So did he sell his likeness to that company or what?

[Shane Dawson]

Well, before we get into that, I just want to watch a couple more Old Man Steve.

[Old Man Steve]

Hey there, old man Steve. I just thought I'd drop in and say hi.

[Shane Dawson]

Hi.

[Old Man Steve]

I lose my voice. What's up with that? I hope you all have a great day. Stay safe. Stay out of trouble. But I have a good time, okay? I know.

[Shane Dawson]

I always do anyway. Okay. Yes. So, old man Steve, here's the thing. So this is what's confusing to me. I don't want to get sued. But if he's telling the truth and if he had nothing to do with it. So that means that somebody took his tick tocks in his videos because he has some. He has, like, a presence on the Internet, and they, like, took it, submitted it to arcads, and now arkads has his likeness.

[Colby]

Yeah, it was really confusing because he seemed like he didn't understand that, but Archadz makes it seem like you have to, like, consent to be like. I consent to my personality. My vision image. Yeah. Likeness being, like, used and all this stuff. But, like, he didn't seem to understand. So, like, that's what I think we were so confused about is like, did something. He have like a family member trick him? Did he, like, do this? Like, I don't know what went on, but it was really interesting.

[Sandy]

I did think for a minute, though that it was AI because of the whole, like, coughing or, you know, trying to make him seem more real.

[Colby]

But the thing that.

[Sandy]

You never know now, the thing that.

[Colby]

Did it for me because I. I like, found this. I was like, this seems like AI, but he has all these props, and that's really hard to do with AI.

[Shane Dawson]

Speaking of props.

[Colby]

Yeah.

[Old Man Steve]

Hello there, old man Steve. Did you know that I collect Santa Claus? Well, except for the monkey. And it's not even Christmas. But I have them up year round because I think they're so cute. I've got a bunch of. This is just some of them.

[Shane Dawson]

That would be insane if that was AI. Honestly, AI could take over if they could do that.

[Lizzy]

I mean, there's no way this guy woke up one morning and thought, I'm going to be goofy on Tik Tok. He has to have a grandkid or a kid or something.

[Shane Dawson]

It's like, hey, I think if we.

[Lizzy]

I mean, we used to make videos with their grandma, right? Imagine if Tik Tok was around back then. She'd be on Tik Tok for sure, killing it. And then I think whoever told the to do that probably got approached, hey, we'll give you like five grand if you let us use a video and the likeness.

[Shane Dawson]

And that's probably what happened, right, old man? Steve, get your bag. Come on.

[Ryland Adams]

Yeah.

[Shane Dawson]

Okay. And here we go. The number one conspiracy of 2024. Oh, Stanley cup lie. Getting in. Surviving. Which, by the way, look at my new cup.

[Chris]

Did it change anything about my husband? No, no, I still. He buys them more than ever.

[Shane Dawson]

But I am aware that it's a big old scam and lies scam.

[Chris]

If it makes you happy.

[Shane Dawson]

No, yes. That, honestly, was the Stanley cup phenomenon. The Colts, the craziness, the fact that they. I don't know if they faked it or not, but the whole thing with the Stanley cup in the car being lit on fire, but it survived, which, like, we tested, did not work then it was. It's bulletproof. You can shoot it with a gun. Which I saw videos of people testing, did not work. So the Stanley cup craze was number one. Which, honestly, I agree. Although I will say really didn't fix me at all. Although, you know, what theory did fuck me up? Like, actually literally ended my relationship with this. The fucking salmon having worms in it he can't eat.

[Chris]

And that used to be, like, a staple in his.

[Shane Dawson]

I haven't had salmon since the fact that there could be worms in our salmon. And when you cook it and they die and it just looks like the white piece on the salmon that you just think is, like, a little something fatty or something. No, it's a fucking worm. I can't even look at it anymore.

[Chris]

That's me. And organic raspberries. Saw those worms, and I'm out.

[Shane Dawson]

So you guys go. Let us know if you agree. What was your number one conspiracy of this year? Let us know in the comments below. Okay, moving on. This is a theory that has been popping up like crazy, and I don't know if I just don't understand, like, a meme, which could be the case. Colby, I feel like you're the most tapped in with memes. Oh, is a celebrity lookalike contest.

[Ryland Adams]

Oh, yeah. First off, the Timothy Chalamet one where he actually showed up and people were arrested.

[Shane Dawson]

Crazy. Is it a meme or. Because.

[Ryland Adams]

No, it's not like a meme.

[Jared]

It's like.

[Ryland Adams]

It's like. Yeah, it's a moment. It's a moment.

[Chris]

I feel like I live on a different planet.

[Jared]

Yeah, there's been, like, a Timothy Chalamet one. There's one like the guy from Twisters.

[Shane Dawson]

What is. So Jared was talking about the celebrity clones and how if you're famous enough, you really do need a clone, because you could die and everybody working for you. You're not.

[Lizzy]

Body double.

[Shane Dawson]

Body double.

[Ryland Adams]

Here's the one thing I will say. The first one went viral.

[Shane Dawson]

Okay.

[Ryland Adams]

So now everyone, I feel like, is just trying to grab at something to have a moment, because the first one just kind of popped up out of nowhere, and it really just, like, the whole city went crazy for it. I want to say it was the Timothy Chandler was the first one.

[Shane Dawson]

Yeah.

[Jared]

Wasn't there a Jeremy Allen White one? That might have been before that. But it's like. Was that after the sh.

[Colby]

One was. Those were the two big ones.

[Chris]

What is it? I don't even know.

[Colby]

There's a.

[Ryland Adams]

You get a bunch of doppelgangers in one area, and whoever wins, whatever. It was like a moment.

[Jared]

They were doing it in New York, and they had, like, a gathering in Central park, and because they didn't have a permit for the gathering, a bunch of people were arrested. And so it became like mainstream media because of the arrests. And Timothy Shalam actually showed up.

[Shane Dawson]

Wait, is this Glen Powell or is this the lookalike?

[Jared]

There was a Glen Powell and the Glenn done.

[Ryland Adams]

We had a Glen Powell lookalike contest today in Austin, Texas, and the people really showed up. I wasn't sure what to expect, but we actually had a lot of great competitors.

[Shane Dawson]

Crazy.

[Sandy]

The second one.

[Ryland Adams]

That one in another universe. I wasn't sure. I need to go to Texas. It was a fun time. The audience cheered for their favorites. But the mom of actual Clint Powell got to choose the winner.

[Sandy]

No way.

[Shane Dawson]

Second place.

[Ryland Adams]

The winner was Because Top Gun, also the favorite of the audience as well.

[Shane Dawson]

What the fuck is going on?

[Ryland Adams]

I don't know, but we need to.

[Sandy]

Do more of whatever that Paul McCartney.

[Shane Dawson]

So, yeah, maybe celebrities are looking for clones of themselves. Or maybe it's just a stupid meme that I don't understand. Okay, this is a quick little one. I just thought it was kind of funny. So it's for Christmas. So you guys know what? Elf on a shelf. Yeah. Okay, so basically you put a little elf on a shelf and you tell your kids it's watching you. If you're back, your gifts are going to be shitty. He's going to tell Santa all the bad things you've done. And then you move the elf every day so it thinks your kid is like, oh, my God, the elf is moving. It's everywhere. I think it's fucking creepy. Well, the theory is that this idea was brought into a world to normalize being constantly surveillance to our kids. So when they grow up, they're going to be used to it and not question why they're constantly being surveillance, why there's elves everywhere. Which honestly I kind of believe that. Because, yeah, kids growing because we didn't grow up with elf on a shelf. And now I'm like, my fucking phone is listening to me. Kids in the future are gonna be like, of course my phone's listening.

[Lizzy]

And most babies are on baby monitors.

[Jared]

And we had furbies since babyhood.

[Lizzy]

Since infancy.

[Shane Dawson]

Yes. Well, there you go. Okay, so I asked in the group chat, I was like, does anybody have any theories that are like, too crazy banned, you know, Lizzie.

[Jared]

So. So there's a theory that dinosaurs perhaps did not really exist. And one of the things that, like, backs that up for me is I heard on the street that none of the dinosaur bones in museums are actually fucking real.

[Shane Dawson]

What?

[Jared]

Like, they're all replicas of the bones. We're like, show me the bones.

[Ryland Adams]

You're taking the information from the street.

[Shane Dawson]

That's where we need to start.

[Jared]

Listen, we don't learn it in schools. We learn it in the streets. And that's why we need a complete overhaul of our educational system because I. I am a victim of this circumstance.

[Shane Dawson]

Hold on. So you think you alone, as your entity, not us, think that dinosaurs are fake? So what was. What's the point of that?

[Jared]

Well, is that.

[Lizzy]

Is that what you got for it?

[Ryland Adams]

So what's the asteroid head?

[Jared]

Well, that's also maybe not real, but.

[Ryland Adams]

They found the impact area.

[Jared]

Well then. Well, that's the difference.

[Shane Dawson]

They could have dug a hole.

[Colby]

Yeah, dug a big hole.

[Chris]

I've seen Jurassic Park.

[Jared]

How do we know what dinosaur skin looked like? Do you know what I mean? How do we know that something that.

[Ryland Adams]

We can't talk about. They didn't know whether or not it was like feathers or things like that because we've never been able.

[Shane Dawson]

All these drawings are.

[Jared]

Sorry for. I'm just. No, I'm bursting at the seat here. But I will say, like, you don't know. And then it's like if you show me the skeleton of a cat, but you draw it under the guise of like it's a dinosaur, like it's gonna look freaky deaky too, right? But there's so, like, there's no reason why we know. Like, well, this one had like a really red spots on its knuckles. Like nobody knows that.

[Chris]

Was it your theory that there weren't dinosaurs and now you're on the other end?

[Jared]

No, I'm just saying that it's a little sus. Like it's a little bit like plug your nose and take this information and then repeat it as though it's facts. But it's like, again, it's just another stupid feeling I have. But like on the simplest level, it's like, how do you know what they looked like? You know what I mean?

[Shane Dawson]

The village of dinosaurs are often very well preserved indeed. But that's not the case with the skin or the soft parts. So imagining what they looked like has been largely a matter of guesswork. So what would. Okay, so if dinosaurs were. And I'm going there. Let's go in. If dinosaurs are fake, what. What's the purpose of creating this fake world that we used to have dinosaurs.

[Chris]

So that I can have a nursery that's dinosaur themed, period.

[Shane Dawson]

So that our boys could love dinosaurs.

[Chris]

I love dinosaurs.

[Shane Dawson]

I don't know Jurassic park could exist.

[Jared]

I mean, I do love Jurassic Park.

[Ryland Adams]

The merchandise alone.

[Shane Dawson]

Yes.

[Jared]

Yeah, I don't Know, I never thought about it that deep. I told you, it's all very basic.

[Lizzy]

On my side, it's because it was after like Darwinism started and evolution started. So this proves if Something went extinct 65 million years ago now, we could put a timeline of billions of years on the earth. Because think about evolution and it's perfect sense. Nothing gets bigger. It only takes more resources for something that's bigger to exist. Like an ancient ant can live off of what, a grain of sand a month? But a human, it takes us a lot more than that. So what if dinosaurs were the ultimate first creatures and they evolved into being lizard people and now run the planet?

[Ryland Adams]

I'm down for that.

[Jared]

Wait, is that just your theory or is that real? Because honestly, it is making a lot of sense to me right now.

[Shane Dawson]

Well, let us know. Do you believe dinosaurs existed or do you think it was all fake? Is, is this video gonna get demonetized? I don't really know. It's a gamble. Okay, well, that was actually interesting. Thank you Lizzie and Jared for breaking down the dinosaurs or fake theory.

[Lizzy]

I may have a video on it on my channel.

[Shane Dawson]

Check it out. Okay. Speaking of some of our favorite things from this year, I would say one of my all time favorite things is Sandy's new life is a true crimer. Because when you break down a true crime story on this podcast, people fucking stop what they're doing to listen. You are good at this.

[Sandy]

I had no idea. So thank you.

[Lizzy]

Her preparation was so intense. On the way here, there is almost.

[Colby]

A true crime story.

[Lizzy]

He tried to break your concentration?

[Sandy]

Yeah, yeah, he tried talking to me. I said, I can't talk right now.

[Shane Dawson]

Okay, so you have prepared a story. The final true crime story of the year.

[Sandy]

Yes. So this story is gonna start with this man named Bruce. Bruce.

[Chris]

Bruce Jenner.

[Sandy]

Bruce Jeffrey Prado. He's in his 40s, he is an engineer and he was single. Thank you. Until his co worker introduces him to a woman named Sylvia Ortega. Now Sylvia Ortega, she's a single mom, she has three kids and they hit it off. They end up getting married about two years later. And then within like nine months of their marriage, she wants to like get a joint account. So he tells her that he doesn't want to do a joint account because she decided to have these kids and he does not want to be responsible for them financially and tells her, you decide to have these kids so you take care of them. And so things start changing. He starts becoming more controlling, but on the outside everything looks great. They end up Purchasing a home. And you know, they're just living life. But on the inside, he's controlling and he's rude. And so she just kind of plays along, right? She's like, okay, you're right, I'll pay for my own kids. You know, they split everything 50, 50. Well, taxes start coming around and so she starts looking into, you know, just paperwork and ends up finding out that Bruce has a kid. So Bruce, prior to their relationship, had a child with this woman. And very creepily, something happened to his child. He ended up drowning, but he didn't die. They sent him to the hospital and he ended up becoming brain dead. So Jeffrey, when they find, when him and this woman that had this kid, he had this kid with, find out that his kid's brain dead, he ends up leaving. He leaves this woman, leaves the child, leaves them with this like $300,000 debt and just flees. He just never looks back. So when Sylvia finds this out, she, you know, addresses it to him. He ends up telling her the truth. Truth. And so then she's like, you know what, I gotta get away from this guy. Like, this is way too much. So she ends up moving in with his, with her parents. Through the divorce, he has to pay her about $3,700 a month. And unfortunately he never ends up paying her because the next month he ends up getting fired from his job. So that happens in May, in June, Bruce ends up going and purchasing a gun. Not just. And then in the same month, he ends up going to get a tailored Santa suit.

[Shane Dawson]

What?

[Sandy]

Okay, so every. So in every 30 days we have a live reenactment? No, every 30 days. Every 30 days he ends up purchasing a new gun.

[Shane Dawson]

What?

[Sandy]

Every 30 days. He even goes out of state because he doesn't want to like set off any alarms. Well, Christmas day eve happens around 11:30pm he goes to the parents house, he ends up knocking on the door because they're having Christmas. There's about 25 to 30 people there. He knocks on the door. Katrina opens the door, he shoots her twice in the face. Everybody just starts scrambling around trying to get away from him. He starts just shooting everybody after that.

[Lizzy]

As Santa.

[Sandy]

As Santa Claus. After that he goes into his bag, he pulls out like an air compressor that he somehow made into a. A fire blower. A torch. I'm sorry, a torch. He lights up the whole house on fire. And the only thing is that he didn't think that their fireplaces are going to be on, but because they were on, and the way the gas interacts with it, his. His suit starts catching on fire. So he runs off into his car and he heads out, but everybody's just in scramble. They're either on, you know, I don't want to get too graphic, but it gets pretty bad. People are jumping out through the windows. And Sylvia's sister ends up going next door and calls the police and says, hey, my daughter's been shot. You need to come hurry.

[Chris]

My daughter's been shot.

[Shane Dawson]

She was shot in the face on the side and she's bleeding.

[Sandy]

And so the police get there, they tell them, hey, it's my brother in law. He did this, like, please go get him. So it didn't take long before Bruce's brother calls the police and says, you need to come to my house. My brother is in on my couch and there's blood everywhere. But he was laying on the couch and he had a gunshot to his head. So he had killed himself. He had like $17,000 strapped onto his leg. You could tell that he was trying to take the suit off of him because he had burns all over his body. The suit had like melted into his skin. And. And so the police ended up going to his car that he had rented and noticed that he had set booty traps all over inside of that car. So they, the bomb squad came in and with the robot they ended up, the car ended up blowing up. And so they ended up going to his house to investigate. Like, what is going on? How did this come about? They find tickets to Canada and so they figured, okay, he was planning to do this and then head over to Canada with this money on his leg in a Santa suit. And then what happens after that is that then Sylvia's lawyer calls and says, there is this unfamiliar car in front of my house. It's been there for days. Like, please come and check this out. So they think it's another car with a booby trap and it's gonna blow up. So they go and they realize that was his real getaway car. His whole plan was to convince the police that he was going going to Canada, but really he was going to go to Mexico. I guess there was maps of like Mexico. There was clothes, there was more money. So the plan was that he was gonna go kill the lawyer, take the car and head out of town.

[Lizzy]

Dude, what if he found another person, lit them on fire, put them in a Santa Claus outfit, shot them in the head on his couch. And Bruce actually did get away because he had a third getaway car that nobody knew about.

[Jared]

Are you, you, Bruce.

[Sandy]

Continue the Crazy thing, though, about that story, which is horrible. I mean, horrible is that Sylvia. So the people that passed away ended up being Sylvia. Her parents, her two brothers, their wives, her sister. So she only had one sister left that, you know, survived. And the girl that got shot twice survived.

[Shane Dawson]

Wow.

[Sandy]

And she. She's a gun control activist, and she's been at most of the events of school shootings, like talking to the news and telling them how important it is about gun control.

[Jared]

You're left here on this earth for a reason.

[Shane Dawson]

You're left here for a purpose. And your job is to keep fighting.

[Jared]

And to shine that light on everybody.

[Shane Dawson]

Else that has been affected.

[Jared]

Being able to really fight for something that is truly, truly close to my.

[Shane Dawson]

Heart is very different.

[Sandy]

So it's pretty crazy how her life kind of under.

[Shane Dawson]

You know, that is one of the craziest things I've ever heard.

[Sandy]

Yeah, that is a little choppy. That was a little choppy at first.

[Lizzy]

And the fact that Bruce can still be out there.

[Shane Dawson]

That is. I don't want to clap for that.

[Colby]

Well, it's a good story.

[Lizzy]

Well, you clap for her ability to convey stuff.

[Shane Dawson]

Yeah, I will clap for that.

[Jared]

Right.

[Shane Dawson]

And for the girl to survive.

[Lizzy]

Yeah.

[Shane Dawson]

That was insane. Well, speaking of villainous masterminds, I thought.

[Chris]

You were gonna say Bruce. That is my middle name.

[Sandy]

What?

[Shane Dawson]

Let's get to a recap. The final recap of the year.

[Chris]

Wow.

[Lizzy]

You gotta recap the whole year?

[Shane Dawson]

The whole thing. You ready? Light, camera, action. Violent recap is about to happen.

[Chris]

On today's episode of the Shane Dawson podcast. Gay Santa. Colby's here. And I really thought to end out the year, Chris was playing with that pot. I thought he was just gonna smash it and break the glass of our fireplace. It would have shocked us all.

[Shane Dawson]

Oh. Shout out kroc.

[Chris]

Oh, hey, kroc, you buttholes.

[Lizzy]

You more like butthole rock, I think you spin this. Are you having a hard time going to sleep?

[Jared]

Are you having a hard time going according to KROC Old Ass Radio and listen to krock? Because that will send you right to slumber town.

[Chris]

Or turn into the Sip podcast with Ryland Adams and Lizzie Gordon.

[Jared]

If you want to stay awake and.

[Chris]

Laugh and enjoy your life, allegedly, it makes people fall to sleep. And it's a real good time.

[Lizzy]

I tried it last night, guys.

[Shane Dawson]

Ryland is a psychopath who can manipulate everybody in the room during Mafia. Uh oh.

[Chris]

A new winner has been crowned in the Christmas version of mafia. And no surprise, it's me, the winner. Hello. I almost lost not one but two friends and one husband throughout, trying to win artwork reveal. Were you guys getting sick of that old Shane Dawson podcast art? It was sickening. Were you tired? Were you searching for something new? Were you thinking this podcast might put me to sleep? Well, not in the next season. Because this new cover art that was just revealed today is stunning, fabulous, iconic, and beautiful. Thank you, Kobe. Okay, special correspondent Jared wants to recap our secret Santa.

[Jared]

Throwing Mr. Jared in the field.

[Lizzy]

It was a big controversy on who would stay on budget. Of course Jared did. Spencer did not. I don't know about everybody else, but I would say that the best gifts were probably received by Shane. The underwear on the head, the game, the gay thing in general. Secret Santa was a success. I stayed on budget and possibly got the best gifts.

[Shane Dawson]

How much were the Shrek? Is the price tag on the Shrek slippers?

[Colby]

It says under 20 right here.

[Lizzy]

We know.

[Jared]

Speaking of slay the house down boots, Sandy had a great story about a killer Santa.

[Sandy]

Very nice.

[Shane Dawson]

Yeah, that was good.

[Lizzy]

That was good.

[Chris]

I don't know if referring to a killer is like, slay the house dab boots.

[Ryland Adams]

Slay the boots.

[Shane Dawson]

I did not think that one through. Oh, Sabrina Carpenter wears a wig.

[Chris]

Controversy. Do you think Sabrina Carpenter, that little pop princess, would lie to you? Yeah, turns out she might.

[Jared]

It's not that. Her espresso.

[Shane Dawson]

It's a wig.

[Ryland Adams]

Oh, that was good. That's good.

[Lizzy]

That was. It was.

[Ryland Adams]

Aish.

[Sandy]

Compared to what we were just watching.

[Ryland Adams]

That was good.

[Jared]

It was good for me.

[Chris]

Did your wife ever stretch your socks?

[Sandy]

How about I'm a little on that intro to that.

[Lizzy]

Still gotta drive home with it.

[Chris]

Ryland.

[Jared]

There'S trouble in paradise as Jared accuses Sandy of stretching his socks or.

[Sandy]

Of having strong calves.

[Chris]

It sounds better of being just beautiful.

[Jared]

If anyone didn't want to exist right now more than dinosaurs, it's me.

[Shane Dawson]

That's a fucking shirt.

[Chris]

Yes.

[Ryland Adams]

I'll make it.

[Shane Dawson]

Thank you.

[Chris]

All right, you guys. Well, if that wasn't one of the worst recaps of the year, I don't know what was. Hope you enjoyed this week's episode of the Shane Dawson podcast. Make sure.

[Shane Dawson]

Wait, what? Hold on.

[Chris]

You have a gift for everyone.

[Shane Dawson]

No, I want you because you have long sleeves. I want you. Oh, my God.

[Chris]

If you would have given this to me, the entire recap, maybe things would have been different.

[Colby]

You're about to see why.

[Ryland Adams]

These are amazing.

[Sandy]

Get more stronger.

[Chris]

Okay, you guys. Well, that's gonna do it for today's episode of the Shane Dawson podcast. We hope you enjoyed this.

[Shane Dawson]

How is this not a bad.

[Sandy]

I know the same.

[Chris]

I hope you enjoyed this year.

[Sandy]

Full of.

[Chris]

Why are you doing a voice?

[Colby]

Why did you, like, punch down and do it?

[Chris]

Controversy.

[Shane Dawson]

You can have. Have small hands and be the same and everything.

[Chris]

Oh, if you want a controversial podcast, make sure you check out ours. The radio hates it.

[Lizzy]

If you want great, pretend, like. Pretend like you're doing the head on the pillow.

[Shane Dawson]

Like, if you want to go to.

[Chris]

Sleep, suggest the sip podcast with Lizzy and Ry. Whose side are you on? You want great photos? Check out Colby.

[Shane Dawson]

Wait, take a photo.

[Chris]

Take a photo in the description section below. He's a great photographer, among other things. Oh, no.

[Jared]

I fear that we need to do the recap again.

[Chris]

This year was a great one. We're so glad you were along the ride with us.

[Shane Dawson]

Fix your hair. Fix your hair.

[Ryland Adams]

Can you do every recap with these?

[Shane Dawson]

Can you do the sip with these? Both of you?

[Chris]

Are there any weeks left for Wiggy to be back here in two weeks?

[Shane Dawson]

It'll be back back in two weeks.

[Chris]

Oh, we don't get a break. All right, guys.

[Shane Dawson]

And wait. Big announcement in two weeks. We got a sponsor. Raycon is sponsoring the finale of Big Brother. $5,000 for the winner. And who's still left in the competition? Me, Ryland, Lizzy, Chris, and you, Reed.

[Chris]

And you better believe if I don't win, there will be hail to pay.

[Jared]

As a new mother, that $5,000 would really change my life.

[Shane Dawson]

And the evicted house guest, me, Sandy, and Spencer will be a part of the jury voting for the winner. It's gonna be crazy, so strap in. See you in two weeks. Sorry. You keep doing the recap.

[Chris]

Okay? Make sure you shop your Shane Dawson merch@shane dawsonmerch.com. follow all of us. We're linked in the description section below. Jared and Sandy are doing vlogmas. I'm doing a version of vlogmas. Lizzy's doing a version.

[Shane Dawson]

Try to hold my Stanley.

[Ryland Adams]

Yes.

[Chris]

Okay. Oh, admit that. What's in this?

[Ryland Adams]

Oh, my God.

[Chris]

Ew. I thought you were drinking Diet Coke. This is sick. You need rehab. Water, water, water. Maybe in Utah.

[Shane Dawson]

Oh, my God.

[Chris]

All right, with that. We'll see you in two weeks right here on the Shane Dawson podcast.

[Ryland Adams]

There's one thing.

[Shane Dawson]

What?

[Ryland Adams]

Okay, so this is really weird, but every single year, I always get my family, like, a celebrity Christmas gift. And so, like, last year, like, coffee Anderson sent my mom, like, a Merry Christmas video. Whatever. Could we just say Merry Christmas to them? And this is gonna be my celebrity.

[Chris]

Yes.

[Ryland Adams]

Yeah. Hi, Mom. Hi, Dad. I guess it worked.

[Shane Dawson]

Merry Christmas. Merry Christmas, everyone. We'll see you next time. Bye.

[Chris]

Bye.

[Shane Dawson]

Sa.