Podcast Summary: The Shit No One Tells You About Writing
Episode: The Significance of Pacing in Storytelling
Release Date: November 14, 2024

Introduction

In this episode of "The Shit No One Tells You About Writing", hosts Bianca Marais, alongside co-hosts Carly Watters and CeCe Lyra from P.S. Literary Agency, delve into the intricate topic of pacing in storytelling. Through the lens of their Books with Hooks segment, they critique query letters and opening pages submitted by emerging writers, offering valuable insights into maintaining an engaging narrative flow.

Books with Hooks: Query Letter 1

Summary of Query Letter

The first query letter reviewed is from Author X, presenting a 98,000-word literary novel titled "The Girls" by Emma Klein. The story centers on 17-year-old Honey, who grapples with her family's decision to prepare for an impending apocalypse predicted by her father. As Honey seeks to uncover the truth behind her mother's disappearance, she faces moral dilemmas and personal growth amidst societal collapse.

Analysis by Carly Waters

Timestamp [03:59]

Carly commends the brevity and focus of the query, highlighting its effectiveness in conveying the plot without overstepping. She praises the introduction of a ticking clock—the world ending in seven days—as a compelling narrative device that enhances the story's urgency. Carly notes:

“I love that she seeks to find her mother. (...) this is, you know, just doing so much for this queer letter in a really, really good way.”
— Carly Waters [03:59]

However, she raises concerns about the comparison to "Educated" by Tara Westover, suggesting it may not serve as the most effective comparative title for pitching to editors. Carly emphasizes the importance of selecting comps that accurately represent the novel's market position and uniqueness.

Analysis by CeCe Lyra

Timestamp [06:54]

CeCe provides constructive feedback on the plot description within the query letter. She points out a lack of causality between actions, questioning how Honey's decision to steal a phone leads to trusting a new character and subsequently wandering the desert. CeCe advises:

“It’s really important in a story to have that dominoes tipping over effect. (...) So just flagging that as a, you know, very thoughtful but potentially not necessary content warning for the sake of the query letter.”
— Carly Waters [03:59]

She also praises the author's personal connection to the story, reminding writers to highlight the "truth within the lie"—the authentic emotions and experiences underpinning the fictional narrative.

Books with Hooks: Opening Pages Analysis for Query Letter 1

Summary of Opening Pages

Carly reviews the opening pages, describing Honey's complex emotions as she participates in breaking horses and anticipates her father's decision on inheriting the ranch. The scene sets up familial tensions and Honey's internal struggles.

Analysis by Carly Waters

Timestamp [08:46 - 10:01]

Carly appreciates the vivid depiction of the ranch environment and Honey's emotional turmoil. She questions the clarity of Honey's knowledge about the wider world, noting inconsistencies between the protagonist's perceived naivety and specific geographical references. Carly remarks:

“I got the sense that maybe she's been told about these places but hasn't been to them. So how does she know these things?”
— Carly Waters [10:01]

She suggests refining the opening to better establish Honey's background and enhancing the emotional depth to align with the high-stakes premise outlined in the query.

Books with Hooks: Query Letter 2

Summary of Query Letter

The second query is from Katie, presenting a 95,000-word historical novel titled "Dust". Set before the Oregon Trail's transformation of the American West, the story follows Casey, a young woman navigating a perilous journey westward amidst family conflicts, natural disasters, and personal loss. The narrative explores themes of survival, familial duty, and self-discovery.

Analysis by CeCe Lyra

Timestamp [16:23 - 21:12]

CeCe enthusiastically praises Katie's query, highlighting its clarity and compelling plot progression. She likens the narrative's cinematic quality, noting:

“I could absolutely shoot the movie trailer for this if I had to. (...) I just think you need to dig deeper into this protagonist's psyche.”
— CeCe Lyra [21:12]

CeCe emphasizes the importance of interiority—the protagonist's emotional and psychological landscape—to enhance character development and narrative engagement. She suggests deepening Casey's internal conflicts to better fulfill the story's promise.

Analysis by Carly Waters

Timestamp [22:26 - 32:42]

Carly echoes CeCe's sentiments, commending the rich sensory descriptions and emotional stakes in the opening pages. She raises questions about family dynamics and the balance of plot devices, particularly the use of multiple animal-related incidents, advising caution to avoid overcomplicating the narrative. Carly observes:

“I did not feel that the way that it was executed got across to me potentially the way that it was supposed to.”
— Carly Waters [29:29]

She underscores the necessity of maintaining narrative pace to keep readers invested, recommending streamlined scenes that advance the plot without unnecessary delays.

Insights on Pacing in Storytelling

Throughout the Books with Hooks segments, both Carly and CeCe provide pivotal insights into pacing—the rhythm and flow of a story. They stress the importance of:

• Maintaining Momentum: Ensuring each scene propels the narrative forward without lingering on redundant actions.

  “You want to start at the top with the trigger warning. I don’t know if we need this... potentially not necessary content warning for the sake of the query letter.”
  — Carly Waters [03:59]

• Balancing Detail and Speed: Offering enough descriptive elements to immerse the reader while avoiding over-exposition that can slow down the story.

  “First lines are really important. (...) It's leveraging imagination. It's really, really important.”
  — CeCe Lyra [13:45]

• Deepening Character Arcs: Integrating interiority to develop characters’ emotional journeys, thereby enhancing the story’s overall pace and engagement.

  “You need emotionality and interiority to eventually lead us to psychological acuity.”
  — CeCe Lyra [16:17]

The hosts illustrate how effective pacing intertwines with character development and plot progression, ensuring a cohesive and captivating narrative.

Conclusion

In "The Significance of Pacing in Storytelling", Bianca Marais, Carly Waters, and CeCe Lyra offer a wealth of knowledge for emerging writers. By dissecting query letters and opening pages, they illuminate the critical role that pacing plays in crafting compelling stories. Their expert critiques underscore the necessity of balancing narrative speed with emotional depth, ensuring that each story resonates with readers from start to finish.

For more detailed critiques and additional writing insights, listeners are encouraged to subscribe to their Substack newsletter, where comprehensive feedback and exclusive content are available.

Notable Quotes:

1. Carly Waters [03:59]:
   “I love that she seeks to find her mother. (...) this is, you know, just doing so much for this queer letter in a really, really good way.”

2. CeCe Lyra [13:45]:
   “First lines are really important. (...) It's leveraging imagination. It's really, really important.”

3. CeCe Lyra [16:17]:
   “You need emotionality and interiority to eventually lead us to psychological acuity.”

4. Carly Waters [29:29]:
   “I did not feel that the way that it was executed got across to me potentially the way that it was supposed to.”

Listeners are reminded to check out the Substack for full-length critiques and additional resources to enhance their writing journey.