Summary4 min read

Simply Pediatrics Podcast: "Intimate Conversations" (February 5, 2026)

Host: Jennifer Zethner, Holistic Certified Pediatric Nurse Practitioner
Episode Theme: Laying the groundwork for open, trusting parent-child relationships through “intimate conversations”—starting from early childhood and evolving through adolescence.

Episode Overview

Jennifer Zethner explores the vital practice of having “intimate conversations” with children, emphasizing that open, honest communication about private and sensitive topics begins as early as the school-age years (ages 4–6). She provides practical strategies—rooted in holistic, evidence-based pediatric care—for normalizing discussions about subjects like body functions, safety, consent, and sexuality. By engaging in these conversations early and often, parents foster a climate where teenagers are more likely to share openly about their lives as they grow.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Setting the Stage for Openness (00:45 – 02:00)

Goal: Creating the kind of parent-teen relationship where teens voluntarily share significant, even sensitive, details of their lives.
The Foundation:
- Open communication doesn’t just happen at age 16 or 17—it begins in early childhood.
- “If you want to have a teenager who talks to you and shares with you... it starts now.” (Jennifer Zethner, 00:55)

2. Intimate Conversations for Young Children (4–6 years old) (01:15 – 02:40)

Initial ‘intimate’ topics are concrete and simple, e.g., “Did you poop today?”
Regular check-ins normalize bodily functions and open the door to discussing health.
Using routine situations, like car rides, helps create a casual, low-pressure environment for these talks.

“I used to like to trap my kids in the car... and I would just kind of talk out loud about things.”
— Jennifer Zethner (01:32)
Talking about topics like bowel movements provides both health insights and sets a precedent for openness.

3. Introducing Body Autonomy and Safety (Good Touch, Bad Touch) (02:40 – 04:00)

Discussing consent and body safety should be an ongoing, context-based conversation:
- Not a one-time, high-pressure talk.
- Use appropriate settings, e.g., before a doctor’s appointment.
- Always use proper anatomical terms—reducing confusion or shame.
“Do it when it makes sense... for example, when you’re on your way to a doctor’s appointment.”
— Jennifer Zethner (03:23)
Keep conversations age-appropriate and bring them up routinely as “part of what we do as a family.”

4. Stranger Danger—Context Is Key (04:00 – 05:00)

Stranger safety also requires ongoing, situationally relevant discussions.
Avoid raising the topic right before bed or at unrelated times; choose moments when the context is relevant (e.g., on the way to crowded places).
Develop customized plans for different environments (e.g., a park versus Disney World).

“We meet as a family, we say, okay, what would we do if this happened? How would you get yourself out?”
— Jennifer Zethner (04:30)

5. Sustaining Conversations into Adolescence (05:00 – 06:00)

Childhood conversations lay the foundation for teens sharing their feelings or experiences.
The old adage applies: “Little children, little problems; big children, bigger problems.”
Early, normalized dialogue ensures teenagers turn to parents when the stakes are higher.
Over-sharing can happen, but it’s a positive sign of trust.

6. Preparing for Puberty and Sex Education (06:00 – 06:45)

Fifth grade is typical for school-based sexuality education; parents must be proactive and involved, regardless of school setting.
Parents should know what’s being covered and participate in the conversation at home.

“Be part of this conversation. Parents... know what it is that those adults are going to speak to your children about.”
— Jennifer Zethner (06:25)
Anticipate changes around fifth to seventh grade: Girls may begin menstruation; boys’ bodies change.

7. Open Dialogue Around Menstruation and Sexual Activity (06:45 – 07:10)

For mothers and daughters: Make menstruation ongoing, not a single awkward conversation.
Normalize sexuality as children mature, keeping connection and safety front and center.

“If you’ve started having these intimate conversations... by the time they reach the age that they’re ready and old enough to be sexually active, be there for them to have those conversations to keep them safe.”
— Jennifer Zethner (07:05)

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

On starting early:
- “You don’t just get to 16, 17, 18 and have one of your kids sharing everything with you. It starts from the beginning.” (00:53)
On the ongoing nature of these talks:
- “It’s ongoing, it’s constant, it’s flowing. We’re constantly having these conversations.” (02:50)
On normalizing hard topics:
- “Good touch, bad touch isn’t like one time we sit down with our kids and we say, listen, this is this and this is that. No. First of all, you’re scared of them.” (03:00)
On parenting as a journey:
- “Parenting is a journey and you’re doing an amazing job. Stay curious and keep learning.” (07:13)

Important Timestamps

00:45 – Introduction to “intimate conversations,” why they start early.
01:32 – Everyday tips: casual check-ins during car rides.
02:40 – Discussing body function and safety topics.
03:23 – Using context—good touch/bad touch and stranger danger talks.
04:30 – Family meetings about safety in different environments.
06:25 – Parental involvement in school-based sex education.
07:05 – The long-term payoff: teenagers who come to you.

Summary

Jennifer Zethner’s “Intimate Conversations” episode guides parents in making communication about health, safety, and bodily autonomy a natural, lifelong family habit. By starting open, age-appropriate conversations with young children, maintaining them through school years, and being proactive during adolescence, parents can build trust and openness—laying the groundwork for healthy, informed, and safe teens. The episode is packed with practical, real-life strategies and empowering reminders that, with intentionality and care, “parenting is a journey” that everyone can navigate with confidence.

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Transcript4 lines

[00:02]
A
Welcome to the Simply Pediatrics podcast, simplifying holistic health care for infants and children. We're so glad you're here. Join Jennifer Zeffner, holistic pediatric nurse practitioner and holistic mom of three on a mission. Listen in as she shares the answers to the most asked questions from parents in her practice every day and offers parents practical strategies and actionable steps to support their child's health and well being. Enjoy this insightful, delightful episode of the Simply Pediatrics podcast and stay tuned for more information at the end of the podcast. Today's episode, Intimate Conversations.
[00:45]
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Hi and welcome. I'm so happy to be with you here today. I'm going to talk about a topic I talk about with all my families with children, you know, like in the school age years and I call it Intimate conversations. Okay. So if you would like to be a mom of a teenager who tells you lots of things, right. If ideally you have like in life this vision of having a teenager who talks to you and shares with you their kind of what's going on in their life, who they're dating, what's going on, and kind of like the intimate conversations, right. If that is the type of relationship you're looking to have with your teenager, it starts now. You don't just get to 16, 17, 18 and have one of your kids sharing everything with you. It starts from the beginning. So in our school age years, you know, 4, 5, 6, start having what I call intimate conversations. And what does that look like? Okay, so intimate conversations for a 4, 5 and 6 year old is did you poop today? Right. So if you're still, you know, part of that potty experience, it doesn't really apply. Right. But once they're kind of like on their own and doing, using the bathroom by themselves, asking them, check in with your kids once a week, twice a week even, right. I used to like to trap my kids in the car. They shouldn't hear that because they'll be on to me. But when we would be driving in the car and they couldn't go anywhere, I just kind of talk out loud about things, right. We should be pooping every day. What should our poop look like? And you know, how frequently should we go and kind of just speaking to the room, if you would. Right. And then ideally, hopefully they're going to answer back and forth and you know, when they get a little bit older, they might roll their eyes and they don't want to hear from you, but they know that as a family we talk about int things. And in school age Years. You know, poop is one of the things to talk about, quite honestly. It's a good, quick insight into your health. You know, if you're not having regular bowel movements, well, you might be dehydrated, you might not be eating properly, you might not be eating enough. You know, overall it's, it's optimal that we're having bowel movements once a day, if not twice a day. And they should be appropriately shaped and color, etc. Okay. That is, you know, important just for our health. So it's actually very important to talk about with your kids. And it introduces them to intimacy. We talk about intimate things in our household. The next thing you can talk about with your children again at school age is good touch, bad touch, and moms and dads. It's not a one time conversation, just like talking about, did we poop this week? It's ongoing, it's constant, it's flowing. We're constantly having these conversations. So good touch, bad touch isn't like one time we sit down with our kids and we say, listen, this is this and this is that. No, first of all, you're scared of them. You know, I encourage families. If you're going to talk about things like, you know, good touch and bad touch, do it when it's appropriate. Right. Just like stranger danger, same thing. So talking to your child about good touch and bad touch would be in a proper setting. So not when they're getting ready to go to bed at night. That doesn't make any sense. It's not in context for them. In fact, you might scare them. So do it when it makes sense. For example, when you're on a way to a doctor's appointment and somebody actually might be looking at your child's body. So use the proper anatomy that we, you know, we call the body. The different parts of the body use the appropriate anatomy terms so there's no confusion for kids. And do it in the proper setting. And stranger danger, we all have heard that. What does that mean? You know, we're teaching our children how to be safe. Again, not before they go to bed at night, not when you're starting a meal, not when you're playing with them in the house. When you're on your way out, you're on your way out to the park, you're on your way to Disney, you're on your way to wherever there's crowds. That's appropriate. We meet as a family, we say, okay, what would we do if this happened? How would you get yourself out of that situation? What's a safe place to go to? Whatever rules and laws would apply to the setting where you're gonna be in, you know, Disney World versus the park, we would have two different things that we would tell our children to stay safe. Right. So when it's appropriate and ongoing. So ongoing conversations about these intimate conversations leads into your preteen teen years of them coming home and maybe sharing information about things that are going on in school, things that they're experiencing, things that they're feeling, which is, we want our children to share this with us. You know, I know from personal experience, you know, sometimes kids can share too much with you, which can be good and bad. But again, you know, being there for them and knowing that they can come to you when things, you know, when we're teenagers, right, like when we're younger, you know, little children, little problems, big children, bigger problems. That is 100% true. And if you want to raise a child, child and a teenager that's going to come and speak to you, it does start early. All right, moms and dads. So intimate conversations begins. 4, 5, 6, just kind of start, you know, sharing, sharing information with them in an appropriate setting, in context, so that they have tools, so they're not afraid and that they understand that as a family, this is what we do. We talk about these intimate things. Traditionally in fifth grade, if your children are in school, fifth grade is the year where they start talking to the boys and the girls separately about their sexuality. Absolutely. Be part of this conversation. Parents, wherever your child is, whether they're homeschooled, in private school or public school, know what it is that those adults are going to speak to your children about. I think many of the schools now involve the parents in this conversation, which they should be, so that you know what information your children are getting in regard to their sexuality. And again, that usually is around fifth grade, which seems young, but that's about right. You know, some girls are going to start to get their menstrual cycle in fifth or sixth grade. Many boys bodies do start to change around sixth, seventh grade. So, you know, be part of that conversation, anticipate it when you know they're reaching that fifth grade level that you're part of that. And then for our girls, absolutely. Moms get right in there, talk to them about their menstrual cycle, have it be an ongoing conversation, not just a one time conversation that you have with your children. And then of course, when they're older, you know, we don't want to think about our children being sexually active. But of course that's reality. So if you've started having these intimate conversations with your children at 4, 5, 6 and into their preteen years, by the time they reach the age that they're ready and old enough to be sexually active, be there for them to have those conversations to keep them safe. Okay, that is it for today. Remember, parenting is a journey and you're doing an amazing job. Stay curious and keep learning and I'll see you next time.
[07:30]
A
Thank you for joining Jenny on the Simply Pediatrics podcast. We hope that the valuable information she shared in this episode will inspire and empower you on your holistic parenting journey. If you would like to learn more about Jenny, her Simply Pediatrics practice, or anything that she spoke about today, please check the show notes that accompany this podcast and you'll find all the links and resources you need. You can also sign up for the SimplyPediatrics mailing list so that you receive Jenny's weekly newsletters packed with vital information and holistic parenting journeys. If you've enjoyed today's episode, please consider giving this page a like and subscribe to the channel so you don't miss any episodes. And don't forget to connect with us by sharing your thoughts in the comments section below. Follow Simply Pediatrics on any and all of the social media platforms. And if you're interested in an in person or a virtual appointment with Jenny, please see the contact details in the show notes. Stay tuned for more episodes packed with a wealth of powerful information to support you on your holistic parenting path. See you next time.
[08:48]
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Sam.