Tasting EVERYTHING at DOMINO’S with Morgan Adams and My Mom!!

Summary

Episode Summary: "Tasting EVERYTHING at DOMINO’S with Morgan Adams and My Mom!!"

Podcast Title: The Sip with Ryland Adams and Lizze Gordon
Host(s): Ryland Adams and Lizze Gordon
Episode Title: Tasting EVERYTHING at DOMINO’S with Morgan Adams and My Mom!!
Release Date: March 5, 2025

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1. Opening Banter and Setting Intentions

The episode kicks off with the dynamic duo, Ryland Adams (referred to as Marcus) and co-host Lizze Gordon engaging in their signature spirited banter. Lizze attempts to steer the conversation towards a more positive and intentional start but quickly finds herself returning to their usual playful conflict.

Lizze (00:11): "We're choosing kindness."
Marcus (00:54): "I'm wet."

Despite Lizze's efforts to set a positive tone, the hosts embellish their dynamic with humorous exchanges, illustrating their chemistry and commitment to entertaining their audience.

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2. Handling Podcast Reviews and Internal Conflicts

The hosts delve into the topic of podcast reviews, specifically addressing negative feedback regarding Marcus's frequent mentions of his vlog. Lizze expresses frustration over listeners questioning whether the show can start without conflict—a recurring theme in their episodes.

Lizze (04:50): "This is a podcast where people are stroking each other's penises, dick sucking."
Marcus (05:10): "I am menstrual."

Their candid discussion highlights the challenges of balancing personal content promotion with audience expectations, leading to a temporary rift that they work to mend through apologies and setting a renewed intention for kindness.

---

3. The Pool Fence Installation Debacle

Transitioning from their interpersonal dynamics, Lizze shares a personal ordeal about installing a pool fence. She recounts the frustration of dealing with the installer’s oversight—placing the fence in a way that obstructs the pool's skimmer, complicating pool maintenance.

Lizze (11:15): "I was so mad that I'm not in the mental space."
Marcus (17:39): "I have to deal with the pool fence."

This segment underscores Lizze’s commitment to safety juxtaposed with the aesthetic displeasure, culminating in her bargaining with the installation company for a resolution, ultimately leaving her seething over the unsatisfactory outcome.

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4. Pop Culture Clash: Bhad Bhabie vs. Alabama Barker

The conversation shifts to a heated pop culture feud between Bhad Bhabie and Alabama Barker. Marcus provides a detailed backstory of the conflict, highlighting personal grievances and the ensuing diss tracks exchanged between the two parties.

Lizze (30:19): "She tries to sleep with your baby daddy."
Marcus (32:27): "She will fudgeing kill you."

Their animated discussion critiques the drama's intensity and the individuals involved, showcasing their unapologetic and unfiltered take on celebrity conflicts.

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5. Oscar Fashion Review: Analyzing Red Carpet Looks

In a lively segment, Ryland and Lizze delve into reviewing the latest Oscar red carpet fashions. They critique various celebrity outfits, balancing praise with constructive criticism.

• Timothée Chalamet’s Look:

  Lizze (44:31): "He has the confidence to wear the look."
  Marcus (45:00): "He's always giving us something to talk about."

• Elle Fanning’s Outfit:

  Lizze (45:20): "She has some other things to apologize for."

• Lupita Nyong'o:

  Lizze (51:39): "She should have just for the way she showed up to this carpet."

Their insights blend humor with genuine appreciation, offering listeners a comprehensive and entertaining analysis of high-profile fashion statements.

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6. Main Event: Tasting Everything at Domino’s

The highlight of the episode features Lizze, Marcus, Morgan Adams, and Ryan’s mom conducting a comprehensive tasting of Domino’s viral pizzas. The group samples various innovative menu items, providing real-time reactions and playful critiques.

• Philly Cheesesteak Pizza:

  Lizze (64:53): "It's so good. It's perfect."
  Marcus (65:34): "Delicious. Lacking nutritious, but delicious."

• Loaded Tots and Stuffed Crust Pizza:

  Shane (66:03): "This is one of the best things I've had on the show."
  Morgan (66:39): "It's so greasy, though."

Their tasting session is filled with humorous observations about the taste, presentation, and overall experience of the viral pizza creations, engaging listeners with both humor and relatable content.

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7. Concluding Remarks and Final Thoughts

As the episode wraps up, the hosts reflect on their experiences, share personal anecdotes, and express gratitude towards their listeners. They also tease upcoming content and encourage audience engagement through various social media platforms.

Lizze (77:23): "Make sure you subscribe to my sister's YouTube channel."
Marcus (73:06): "I admit it. I love the woman."

The episode concludes on a high note, emphasizing the camaraderie among the hosts and their commitment to delivering entertaining and unfiltered conversations.

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Notable Quotes:

• Lizze (00:17): "You just have to keep restarting."
• Marcus (04:03): "Is this an apology?"
• Lizze (11:39): "My blood boils."
• Marcus (25:02): "I am ready and willing to ADM that I am violently obsessed with Jennifer Lopez."
• Lizze (44:21): "She's giving District one."
• Marcus (65:34): "Delicious. Lacking nutritious, but delicious."

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Key Takeaways:

• Authentic Interaction: The hosts maintain their authentic, unfiltered interactions, balancing conflict with apologies to keep the conversation engaging.
• Personal Anecdotes: Sharing personal stories, such as the pool fence installation, adds depth and relatability.
• Pop Culture Insight: Their takes on current pop culture events, like the Bhad Bhabie vs. Alabama Barker feud, offer unique perspectives.
• Entertainment-focused Content: The Oscar fashion review and Domino's tasting provide diverse content that caters to a wide range of listener interests.
• Humorous Banter: Consistent humor and playful teasing enhance the overall listening experience, making complex topics accessible and entertaining.

This comprehensive episode weaves together personal stories, pop culture discussions, fashion critiques, and a fun tasting segment, all underscored by the hosts' engaging and dynamic chemistry. Whether you're a regular listener or new to the show, this episode promises a blend of laughs, insights, and delicious pizza reviews that leave you craving more.

Transcript

[Lizzie]

I think it was direct.

[Marcus]

Oh, you do?

[Lizzie]

Yeah, you. You set a very stern boundary with me, and I crossed it. Anyways, just a couple of lesbians ready to take on the world.

[Marcus]

You are so fucking crazy. One thing.

[Lizzie]

Come on, Marcus, pull this sock up. Oh, God.

[Marcus]

If Kevin Klein could see us now.

[Lizzie]

Who's that?

[Marcus]

He'd still have the stupidest name in the history of broadcast.

[Lizzie]

So you're starting Beef again right off the top?

[Marcus]

No, I'm just being in a. I.

[Lizzie]

Did want to try something, so.

[Marcus]

Being kindness off the top. I love it.

[Lizzie]

You know what? I was seeing a lot of people being like, could this show ever start without a fight? Right out at the gates.

[Marcus]

Did I do something wrong?

[Lizzie]

I don't know.

[Marcus]

We tried so hard to start with.

[Lizzie]

Kevin Klein's laughing at us again.

[Marcus]

Oh, man.

[Lizzie]

No. You know, I feel like, yes, I pick a fight with you at the top of every episode.

[Marcus]

Is this an apology?

[Lizzie]

No. In my mind, it's somewhat of an improv warm up. Oh, it's to dip my toes in the conversational whirlpool.

[Marcus]

Yeah.

[Lizzie]

It's to get me going. It's to get me started. I mean, there's a reason people do warm ups before they do improv.

[Marcus]

Yeah.

[Lizzie]

And this podcast is usually.

[Marcus]

It's like a group of people standing in a circle, being like, I got your back. No, I got your back.

[Lizzie]

Way to ruin the punchline. Oh, Miss who by? You.

[Marcus]

Who am I? You.

[Lizzie]

Wow, this is not going well. Cut the camera, Chris. We're going to start over.

[Marcus]

Cut the camera so we can beat each other to death, Chris.

[Lizzie]

No. We're choosing kindness.

[Marcus]

We're choosing kindness.

[Lizzie]

Here's the deal.

[Marcus]

The dill. The biggest deal.

[Lizzie]

The biggest deal. We're going to set an intention.

[Marcus]

Uhhuh.

[Lizzie]

We're going to be nice to each other.

[Marcus]

Oh, my God.

[Lizzie]

And then you're going to teach us how to do an improvisational warm up.

[Marcus]

I'm wet.

[Lizzie]

And yes, yes.

[Marcus]

And yes. And I'm wet. What is happening?

[Lizzie]

You just said I'm wet.

[Marcus]

Yes.

[Lizzie]

Oh, I'm supposed to go with it.

[Marcus]

Yeah.

[Lizzie]

This is why I got kicked out of improv 2.

[Marcus]

We were reminiscing the other day that Rylan and I went to iOS to do improv, like maybe 15 years ago when we were seven. And they kicked us out because we went straight into the second level class. And then some. I don't. I don't remember it as good as.

[Lizzie]

You bitch.

[Marcus]

Some.

[Lizzie]

No. Here's what happened. Those improv classes are very expensive. And when you're looking over the course curriculum. It's like, why would I pay for nothing to go, like, six weeks into course one when I could just start in course two and really get my money's worth? Yeah. But I guess, like, the standard practice is that you have to start at Class 1 and go all the way up. Imagine that.

[Marcus]

But I think both of us had already done. Well, I at least had done improv elsewhere prior to.

[Lizzie]

Oh, and I think you were going into class two, and I wasn't willing to go in class one alone, so I wanted to join your class.

[Marcus]

Right.

[Lizzie]

But you were coming from Class 1 at a different location, and so.

[Marcus]

But I also wasn't willing to pay for Class 1 at iOS.

[Lizzie]

Right. And so we're enjoying our time in our first class.

[Marcus]

Yeah.

[Lizzie]

We're trusting our colleagues.

[Marcus]

We're yes ing and anding.

[Lizzie]

We're having a blast.

[Marcus]

Living, laughing, loving.

[Lizzie]

We confide in another human that maybe we skipped the introduction course. And this. She was like, I had to pay for course one. I had to go to course one. And they jumped to course two, and it's not fair.

[Marcus]

And they're hot and skinny and fun. Fuck them.

[Lizzie]

And so they kicked us right out of improv, too. And I've. No.

[Marcus]

They said, would you like to be, like, sent back? And we were like, no, we literally would not.

[Lizzie]

I was like, I'm better than these people.

[Marcus]

Both of us were like, the. Like, we're not. We're not an introductory girl.

[Lizzie]

I don't think I'm better as a person. I think I'm better at improv.

[Marcus]

I don't think I know.

[Lizzie]

What.

[Marcus]

I don't think I know what. Like, I don't think I know about what.

[Lizzie]

Oh, you don't think, period. You know, that we're better than them.

[Marcus]

Yes.

[Lizzie]

From a talent perspective.

[Marcus]

From it all around.

[Lizzie]

So I just thought, what is an alternative to me picking a fight with you to start the show off?

[Marcus]

You could say something nice.

[Lizzie]

Why would I do that?

[Marcus]

Oh, my God.

[Lizzie]

Me starting the show by saying, lizzie, stunning, talented, and beautiful doesn't get anyone anywhere. A podcast where people are stroking each other's penises, dick sucking. Not great. Although. Although Lizzie did offer to jack me off the other night.

[Marcus]

Oh, my God.

[Lizzie]

You can't dance around this girl.

[Marcus]

I did not offer to jack you off. I did. Not at all.

[Lizzie]

Whatever.

[Marcus]

Yeah, whatever.

[Lizzie]

The proof is in the pudding.

[Marcus]

It's in the pod. I mean, the vlog.

[Lizzie]

It's in her vlog.

[Marcus]

My vlog.

[Lizzie]

Oh, I was reading. Okay. Wow. I'M jumping all over the place. No, apparently there's reviews on podcasts. I forgot. Like, people leave reviews on Apple podcasts.

[Marcus]

Yeah.

[Lizzie]

And I don't know how I got there, but I got there.

[Marcus]

How'd it go?

[Lizzie]

And a lot of people bitching about you plugging your, like, bringing up your vlog every week. And I was like, why is that a source of problem?

[Marcus]

Yeah, go watch my vlog.

[Lizzie]

Should we go review some of them right now? Or is it just too much?

[Marcus]

Is it going to hurt my feelings? Because probably not. I am menstrual.

[Lizzie]

They're nasty over there.

[Marcus]

Oh, then no, they're absolutely not there. You said, let's start the show with positivity and intention and an improv fudgeing thing. And then you go into, there's people on the Internet who hate you. I think I'd like to platform them on the show. That's about 30% your.

[Lizzie]

I just didn't realize that this was a thing. And so I thought it'd be hilarious.

[Marcus]

To read the full steam ahead. Oh, my God, this guy is such a bitch.

[Lizzie]

Well, this person isn't mad at you. She's just honestly pretty over anything Taylor Swift related, but finds the podcast entertaining.

[Marcus]

Oh, okay.

[Lizzie]

So thank you. Oh, no, don't do it.

[Marcus]

Just move on.

[Lizzie]

You're not strong enough right now. No, you're not strong enough. No. Are you sure you're not strong enough.

[Marcus]

Look at me. Do I look strong enough?

[Lizzie]

Okay, maniac, womp, womp. Cry somewhere else if you don't like them, leave. Oh, they're standing up for us.

[Marcus]

Yay. Listen, as far as I'm concerned, engagement's engagement.

[Lizzie]

Okay, so you are ready for these?

[Marcus]

No.

[Lizzie]

Okay. Okay.

[Marcus]

I don't want to start my day on a nasty foot.

[Lizzie]

Why is she so angry about the world?

[Marcus]

Because you're nasty.

[Lizzie]

Like, see a therapist for I tried and she sucked. Lizzie is a little ridiculous.

[Marcus]

The fact that you're still doing.

[Lizzie]

Not wanting to share. No, no, no. This is the one. It's just not wanting to share anything on the podcast and telling her to go to her YouTube channel. I just won't listen to the podcast anymore. Oh, okay. Well, she's not here anyways, so. Oh, can you not access all the reviews? Well, you're in luck. Good. That's it.

[Marcus]

Really odd choice to start with. Just shitting on me a bunch after I said five times. I'm not in the mental space.

[Lizzie]

I can't help that. Nobody.

[Marcus]

I can' Now I want to cry. That hurt my feelings.

[Lizzie]

They didn't even say anything nasty about you.

[Marcus]

That was too nasty for me. I'm very sensitive right now.

[Lizzie]

Oh, now I'm a bully.

[Marcus]

I would say so.

[Lizzie]

Oh, my God.

[Marcus]

That was crazy. I said five times. No, I'm not in that space.

[Lizzie]

Okay, well, I'll just cut it all then.

[Marcus]

Okay, let me bring it back together and inexplicably be nasty the rest of the episode with no one understanding that it was because you're a. Anyways, let's talk about other things.

[Lizzie]

Well, somebody has to.

[Marcus]

Like your sensory deficient children.

[Lizzie]

Actually, the water table was a hit, and they played with it for hours, which I would call a sensory activity.

[Marcus]

I would, too.

[Lizzie]

So I would call.

[Marcus]

They probably enjoyed it after their deprivation.

[Lizzie]

Wow, so you do want to be nasty.

[Marcus]

No, I'm just saying if you're choosing.

[Lizzie]

Nastiness, then I'll just say I'm. I'm the one that's produced this podcast. I pulled all the red carpet looks to review for the Oscars. I pulled all the advice questions. I put the majority of the top of the show, so.

[Marcus]

So you get to bully me if.

[Lizzie]

I have to come up with a segment of reading reviews. I think every podcast in the history of the world has reacted to their reviews of their podcast.

[Marcus]

Okay.

[Lizzie]

Okay, then I don't even want to do the show anymore.

[Marcus]

No, let's keep doing the show, but let's be nice and set an intention.

[Lizzie]

Okay, set your intention.

[Marcus]

I would like to. To have a nice day with my friend, and I apologize for bringing up your children's sensory deprivation. That was crazy of me, and it was not nice. And I don't actually think they're sensory deprived. I just thought I would come up with something as nasty as you had thrown in my face.

[Lizzie]

I apologize for reading the nasty reviews about you even when you said you weren't in the mental state to hear them.

[Marcus]

I appreciate that.

[Lizzie]

To be fair, I chose the nice ones.

[Marcus]

That's not helpful. That's not helping. And I've been over here, super professional and not comparing us to Trump and the President of Ukraine, but that's a lot. How this is opening.

[Lizzie]

What? Okay, now you just got us canceled for real.

[Marcus]

No, I am saying I did watch Trump and what is the President of Ukraine's conversation on national international television? And I had to stop for a second. I thought, wow, this is a lot like our podcast. I was like, is this how our audience feels every Wednesday? Because I am uncomfortable.

[Morgan]

Like, what the.

[Marcus]

And the fact that I can't even remember the president of Ukraine's name is.

[Lizzie]

Like, really problematic, and I know that.

[Marcus]

But it's because I'm postpartum. It's not because I haven't ever known it, because I know it.

[Lizzie]

Well, now our iPad's gonna die. Oh. Oh.

[Marcus]

We don't need it. We have our phones.

[Lizzie]

I'm trying to use Joy, but everything on my lineup is drama. What?

[Marcus]

Oh, no. What's your. Why?

[Lizzie]

I had a dramatic week. What do you want from me?

[Marcus]

I thought we had a fun house.

[Lizzie]

We had a wonderful week, but I also had a dramatic week.

[Marcus]

And your mom and your sister are in town.

[Lizzie]

Yeah, they're going to be on. They're going to join us for the food portion of the show and for the after sip on the Patreon.

[Marcus]

Is this literally all because your backyard is ugly and fenced in now? Is this all stemming from your fence rage? Rylan got his pool fenced in, and it feels like he hasn't been the same since, like a dark cloud descended upon our beautiful gay boy. And he's now got a hideous backyard because he's protecting the lives. Zelinsky. I just remembered, his name is Vladimir Zelinsky. I've always known it. Chris didn't just notify me of that fact. I have indeed known his name.

[Lizzie]

So my backyard is my pool. Like, you walk out my back door and it's the pool. So when you fence in the pool, it's now just a big fence. You look outside, and it makes the house feel claustrophobic because we have a lot of windows looking out to the backyard.

[Marcus]

Yeah.

[Lizzie]

And now instead of a beautiful pool, it's a fence.

[Marcus]

A life saving fence.

[Lizzie]

No. You know what?

[Marcus]

Yeah. You don't think it's saving lives.

[Lizzie]

I do think it's saving lives. I wouldn't have it if I didn't think it was saving lives. But up into this point, because we have all of our doors and they can't even reach the door locks, and we don't leave those unlocked, it's been fine. But now that they're really mobile, it was time to get the pool fence.

[Marcus]

I literally only took my kid to pool safety classes because I was worried about falling in your pool while holding the baby.

[Lizzie]

The plan was for me to always get a pool fence.

[Marcus]

No, I know. I'm saying I went to swim class initially because I wanted to make sure if I was holding my baby and you didn't have a fence and I fell in with him, he'd be cool.

[Lizzie]

Okay.

[Marcus]

Yeah.

[Lizzie]

Right. Well, the pool fence. And I thought it was going to be fine. I was excited about the pool fence. I was like, oh, my gosh, we're going to be able to in the backyard now because we do avoid the backyard. The back. The backyard's fenced in separately than our yard yard already. So we just didn't play in the backyard. We'd go elsewhere. But now that that's fenced in, I was like, oh, we can. I was excited because I was like, now we can play in the backyard. It's right outside of Max's room. We can have more outdoor time and it will be a lot of fun. And then the pool fence gets installed. And I had a full blown mental breakdown about how hideous our house is now. And it doesn't have anything to do with the safety of it. Of course we're leaving it. I did look into the options, though. Like, could I get one that, like, electrically moves over? Could I? But we have crazy shapes.

[Marcus]

Electrically moves over?

[Lizzie]

Yeah, like it's under. It's above the water, below the ground, but they go and they slide over, but then it blocks the water. So you're just seeing a big tarp. Essentially, it's a safe tarp, but you're seeing a tarp. And I have an oval shaped pool with a hot tub cut out. So I just. It was going to cost so much money and so impractical and wouldn't even be as safe as I would want it to be. So whatever. I have to deal with the pool feel fence. But that wasn't even really my pro. My problem. I spent hours doing research on who I should get the pool fence from, who has the best reviews. Because whatever. After I make my decision, I get the quote from this guy. We talk it through. It's great. He was supposed to come on a Sunday. He had to cancel and come on a Monday. And I said, that's gonna be fine. But we filmed the podcast on a Monday. And so of course they show up right when we're leaving to do the food portion of the podcast. And I was like, my husband can't be trusted to do this. Oh.

[Marcus]

And it's not. It's not for any other reason besides the fact that he's a husband. And there seems to be an issue with that.

[Lizzie]

My husband does so many great, wonderful things.

[Marcus]

So everyone's husband tends to.

[Lizzie]

But when it's in relation to the aesthetics or the functionality of something that's being installed around the house, a husband can't be trusted.

[Marcus]

And it's not because it's your specific husband. It's is. It's all husbands.

[Lizzie]

And I even made him a video in the morning. I said, this is where we need the fence. 15 foot. Not get like, whatever. So that when we're having pool days, we can remove it. This is where I want the gate.

[Marcus]

This is every wife makes an instructional video, and every husband, for some reason, has a hard time.

[Lizzie]

And so he gets there, and of course I'm like, oh, he's gonna miss him at the gate. So I'm calling Shane. I think it was even on the Patreon, me calling Shane, being like, you need to go grade him. He's like, I know. I'm going right now. And then Shane calls me, and he's like, do you want it one and a half feet from the pool or two feet from the pool? And I was like, I don't know. You need to really weigh out all the options and see. And I'm so mad that I'm not there. Hang up the floor on. I'm like, ah, he's gonna make the wrong decision, even though he has the best intention to make the right decision. But I don't know, because I'm not there and we're filming.

[Marcus]

I get the decision that was made.

[Lizzie]

And the pool skimmer is covered now by a fence.

[Marcus]

Listen, you texted me about this, and I was like, what in the is a pool skimmer? And why is that such a problem?

[Lizzie]

It is where all. When your filter pump is on. It's what? Where all the debris get sucked into.

[Marcus]

Okay.

[Lizzie]

So when you're cleaning your pool, you open the. You open the skimmer lid, and you pull out everything that the pool has cleaned.

[Marcus]

Okay.

[Lizzie]

And so that's how you get all the leaves and dirt and debris that has flown into your pool out of the pool. And so, like, yes, these are removable fences. So, like, it can be done, but it's another four minutes each time. And it's just like.

[Marcus]

So four minutes. Is that for a total of eight, or is it four minutes total?

[Lizzie]

It depends on how handy you are.

[Marcus]

Damn.

[Lizzie]

And I don't know, you know, it's. If it's me by myself, it's eight minutes. No, if it's my skilled pool man that works with these safety fences all the time, you could probably do it in two.

[Marcus]

That's impressive.

[Lizzie]

Whatever. So Shane made the right choice, because if he would have gone two feet, it would have really, like, blocked the walkway. It would have been awful. But. But my problem is with the company, he should have, because they were looking on one side of the pool. And Shane was like, okay, we should do one and a half feet. But he didn't say, well, one and a half feet means that on the other side of the pool, you're going to cover the skimmer. So Shane had no idea. He wasn't, like, measuring across the thing. It's like, we're not in the industry of installing pool fences. I feel like the person that's designing the pool fence should have said, you.

[Marcus]

Want to cover your skimmer.

[Lizzie]

Yeah. Just so you know, although it might be more aesthetically pleasing, you are going to cover your skimmer, which is going to create another problem, which means you have to remove the fence. Fence every time you want to clean your pool.

[Marcus]

Yeah.

[Lizzie]

And so I called the main guy, not the installation guy. And I was like, hey, they covered the skimmer. And he's like, that's your fault. And I was like, my fault? And he goes, yeah, you decide where it goes. And I was like, yeah, but I'm not. I don't install these every day to know. And I would think everyone in their right mind would not want their skimmer covered. And he goes, yeah, you'd be surprised. Some people don't care if the skimmer's covered. And I was like, well, I care if my skimmer's covered, so what can we do? And he's like, also, I'd like to.

[Marcus]

Know what percentage of people care about their skimmer being covered versus not covered. You know what I. I mean? Like, how surprising is it?

[Lizzie]

And I was like, what he should have proposed is the 1 1/2ft on the front side of the pool and then going two feet on the backside of the pool because you wouldn't really notice from the vantage point or whatever. And he's like, well, now we can't go out because it's already been done, and there's holes that have been drilled, but you can add a fence, but that's going to cost you another $350.

[Marcus]

No.

[Lizzie]

If I install another gate that opens over the skimmer, then I think you should cover the cost of the 350. And he goes, well, no, that's the cost of the gate for me personally. And I was like, well, you're going to have to meet me in the middle at least. And he was like, let me think about it. And he calls me back. He's like, I talked to my guy, and he confirmed that you did say it was a foot and a half and you knew what it was. So it just is what it is. The way My blood boils.

[Marcus]

What did you say?

[Lizzie]

I was just like, I'll think about it. But if I want the gate, you're gonna have to meet me halfway and pay for. It's gonna have to be 150.

[Marcus]

What if he just says no to you, though?

[Lizzie]

Then I'm gonna leave an awful Google review. I didn't threaten it there.

[Marcus]

Do you think they're gonna read that review on their podcast?

[Lizzie]

I haven't done it yet. Oh, but on their podcast. Whatever. So I'm just pissed about it the more. And then Lizzie walks into my house this morning and she goes, why is your backyard so hidden? Oh, it's the pool fence. I was like, oh, for the safety of my children, I got a hideous pool fence. But it does save lives.

[Marcus]

Yeah.

[Lizzie]

And it's necessary and we needed it, so whatever. It is what it is.

[Marcus]

Yeah.

[Lizzie]

Then I fell for an Instagram ad. I don't know why I just had to fight with people this week. I had to fight you just because.

[Marcus]

Everything'S going a little too good.

[Lizzie]

It was a $34 set of toys, and I just can't let it go. They're magnetic.

[Marcus]

Do you not have the picture of it? Oh, I want to see the real one.

[Lizzie]

So they're magnetic cubes. And the Instagram ad really got me because it looked so fun. It's like, the perfect thing for kids my age right now. Some would say it's a sensory activity. And I go and I go to the site from the Instagram ad, and it's like. Like, for ages one plus, it shows the big blocks that are beautiful and fun. It takes three weeks for them to get here. When they got here, their blocks the size of ants, literally, it's like they're choking hazards. And it says, for ages three plus, it's just a can of olives for ages three plus. And I'm like, oh, my God. I was so mad because I was so looking forward to them. I know it's so trivial. It's a toy for my children. But I kept checking the tracking, and then when I got the hair here, I was so excited. I couldn't find them anywhere. They were in the mailboxes, like. And then when I got them out, tiny thing for ants. So I email customer support, and I'm like, hey, you gave me toys for ants. And it says, for children three plus. I ordered something for one plus. Here is the confirmation picture that I ordered, actually what I wanted.

[Marcus]

Well, here's the problem with all those pictures.

[Lizzie]

They're not real, but they were next to babies. And I could.

[Marcus]

That's what I'm saying. They're always next to babies. And you're like, damn, that's huge. And then you get it next to your baby and you go, that is not.

[Lizzie]

And she emails me back, can you send pictures? I go, of course. Here's what you sent. Here's what I ordered. Here's the picture confirmation in my email of what I ordered. That shows the measurements of the cubes. Yeah, it's not it. So tell me how to either get a refund or send me out my new product. And she goes, I'm gonna have to escalate this up higher.

[Marcus]

And I was like, not an escalation.

[Lizzie]

You shouldn't have to escalate it up higher. She doesn't reply to me for two days. And I go, hey, can you help me out here? And she goes, can you send pictures? I go, look in the email chain above. I already have. And I'm going to FL this as a scam with my credit card company if you don't refund my product or give me the product that I wanted. This is $34. And I'm really just like, you can't give up on. I can't give up on.

[Marcus]

Not in this house.

[Lizzie]

And she goes, I've talked to my manager and you did get the correct product. It's just a rebranding with new imagery on the packaging. And I said, no, this three plus it's for ants. And I order something for one plus the right product. No response. I emailed them again this morning. Hey, let me know how I can get a refund on this product market as a scam.

[Marcus]

You and what's it called? What's this company called?

[Lizzie]

Like every sized or something ever look.

[Marcus]

Up in the email. And we're, we're gonna have our buddies go up, up. You know, everybody who's got this negative energy towards our podcast, please redirect it to a Google review of these ever rise for ants.

[Lizzie]

And then when you go on their website, it's like 24 hour customer support. There's no, there's no phone number.

[Marcus]

And they ever rise.

[Lizzie]

Are they emailing me back right now? No.

[Marcus]

No.

[Lizzie]

Yeah. Oh.

[Marcus]

Oh.

[Lizzie]

They drive me crazy. So I don't know what it is. Maybe I'm angry this week. Maybe I'm being nasty this week. Maybe I'm the crazy one. I should be able to let a $34 toy go, right?

[Marcus]

I find that acceptance is the answer to all my problems today.

[Lizzie]

Well, I'll Accept it.

[Marcus]

Maybe I can see it hurting.

[Lizzie]

It hurts, you know, I don't know why, but it hurts.

[Marcus]

I. On Valentine's Day, I ended up ordering a sleep sack for my baby to sleep in from Kite Baby, because I love their sleep sacks. And, oh, I was coming off of the propofol and I fell in love with all their humpback whale print. And I was like, I need some humpback whale. And no matter what, Billy was is sizing out of his sleep sack that he's in right now, so I needed a new one. So I buy the humpback whale one and then I get the print in Be Mine, which is a Valentine's Day special. The next, like, in within 20 minutes of me paying full price for Be Mine, they send an email saying all Valentine's Day items are on sale 20 off now. I was not given 20 off 20 minutes prior. What the is that?

[Lizzie]

Did you email them?

[Marcus]

Fuck no, I didn't.

[Lizzie]

Let it go.

[Marcus]

I'm not you.

[Lizzie]

Oh, my God.

[Chris]

How can you let something go?

[Marcus]

$10. I'm gonna find a way to contact a person when I can barely function as an adult myself.

[Lizzie]

Well, that's the thing. I've wasted so many hours, which equates to, like, so much money working hours trying to fight this problem. Yeah, well, I should just lose the 34. But I still want the toy.

[Marcus]

Yeah, I don't know that the toy exists, baby. Oh, no, I know that's the problem.

[Lizzie]

But I do.

[Marcus]

And all the moms, my mommy and Greek mommy and me group are like, get that money, girl. Here's what you do. Cancel your another order. I was like, I'm so fucking dumb. I couldn't even figure out how to place the order in the first place. It took me so fucking long to place the fucking initial order. I'm not going to go back now and cancel that order or get it in the mail, return one for the second one that's coming, and be out that money on the time that I'm waiting for that other money to come back. Do you know what I'm saying? What are we doing here?

[Lizzie]

Well, let's start this podcast over. Your hair looks great.

[Marcus]

Thank you.

[Lizzie]

You're beautiful.

[Marcus]

I'm a little clammy.

[Lizzie]

I like it. It's cool.

[Marcus]

You like the clam?

[Lizzie]

It's nice.

[Marcus]

Thank you.

[Lizzie]

It's refreshing.

[Marcus]

Why do you have a stab? I can now see your waist slash jeans. We are starting on a positive note, Chris. Right?

[Chris]

What I was telling you to talk.

[Marcus]

About my waist in my jeans. Damn. Chris said the only reason he follows me on Instagram is because I'm fat now. Verbatim. That's my face. Last week, he said it.

[Lizzie]

Liar.

[Marcus]

All right. Is my waist still in? No.

[Lizzie]

Okay, well, so you got a haircut, and it's gorgeous.

[Marcus]

Thank you.

[Lizzie]

And it's beautiful. And my intention today is to appreciate those around me.

[Marcus]

Oh, my God. I love that intention.

[Lizzie]

And it starts right now.

[Marcus]

Starting now. No, now you just have bad thoughts, and you have to just keep restarting. Well, thank you so much. I love the shirt you're wearing and the jeans, even though you feel they're too long. I don't feel that way. Yeah, that's a feeling, not a fact.

[Lizzie]

You like a bunch at the bottom.

[Marcus]

I like a bunch of crunch at the bottom.

[Lizzie]

See, I don't like a bunch. If anything, I'd like, like, the slightest crop.

[Marcus]

You want us to see your ankle? What are you trying to prove?

[Lizzie]

I have a good ankle.

[Marcus]

You do have a good ankle. I'm actually looking at it now. It's very tan. Cause you keep that shit exposed. Cute.

[Lizzie]

What happened to you this week?

[Marcus]

What did happen to me this week?

[Lizzie]

You have some things.

[Marcus]

Okay, I have a public apology to make.

[Lizzie]

Oh.

[Marcus]

To Ms. Jennifer Lopez.

[Lizzie]

You're so freaking obsessed with her, it's sick.

[Marcus]

Honestly, I am ready and willing to ADM that I am violently obsessed with Jennifer Lopez. I was at the gym working on my fitness, and a song comes on, and I knew every word. You know me. I don't know the words to any songs. I don't even know the words to the Taylor Swift songs that we spent $100 million going to see. And I love Taylor Swift. I don't know word. I knew every word to this song, and I was like, who is this? What? What is this song? And then it hit me. It's Jennifer Lopez from an, like, a CD that came out in 2003. Every word. Hey, come. Did you play that song? You know that it turns me on. Just turn.

[Lizzie]

Careful about the copyright.

[Marcus]

Oh, God, it sounds just like her. And then I realized I had this bitch's perfume, too. I've been spritzing myself with Jennifer Lopez perfume since 2003.

[Lizzie]

To this day.

[Marcus]

To this day. This day.

[Lizzie]

You're rocking JLO right now. Every time you've ever talked about her on this podcast, you're rocking herself. That.

[Marcus]

And I don't even think about it. And then I'm like, yeah, it's nuts. Good for her, though.

[Lizzie]

What is going on? Who needs you in this moment?

[Marcus]

My grunty, a friend of mine that I call a grunty.

[Lizzie]

Okay.

[Marcus]

She's. She says she wishes she was my teen mother. So she's like Billy's auntie grandma. A grunty.

[Lizzie]

Okay.

[Marcus]

Yeah, yeah.

[Lizzie]

So you take back all the nasty words you said to Jennifer Lopez.

[Chris]

I do.

[Marcus]

As a matter of fact, I do. I'm as obsessed with Jennifer Lopez as you are with Timothy Chalamet, who looked.

[Lizzie]

Infuriating at the Oscars last.

[Marcus]

You love him. And one day you're going to be in the gym and you're going to realize you are singing a Timothy sham song that you've known since you were 12 years old.

[Lizzie]

Maybe it was just take a piece of his art for me to really, like, consume and get on board, but right now it's hard for me to follow. Wow.

[Marcus]

I don't know that that's true.

[Lizzie]

Did you see either of his looks last night?

[Marcus]

Kind of.

[Lizzie]

Kind of. We're going to get to that. On the Patreon. It was highly requested that we review the Oscar fashion.

[Marcus]

Okay.

[Lizzie]

So I pulled the Oscar looks from the red carpet for you all.

[Marcus]

Oh, my God.

[Lizzie]

And we're gonna do just that.

[Marcus]

Okay, let's do it.

[Lizzie]

I'm a girl that can produce a podcast.

[Marcus]

I love that about you.

[Lizzie]

And when I have nothing that's produced, I just revert to fighting with my best friend.

[Marcus]

Well, my production was texting you this. Can we talk about the Bad Baby Alabama Barca drama?

[Lizzie]

I know nothing about it.

[Marcus]

Can I tell you everything except for.

[Lizzie]

That her tits were out and she was still number one. A bad baby.

[Marcus]

Oh, yeah.

[Lizzie]

I, I. You sent me the video because you Ms. Whitman. That's the song.

[Marcus]

Yeah.

[Lizzie]

Okay. She sent me the video. Number one trending on YouTube. Lots of.

[Marcus]

Can I give a little backstory for the audience that might not know?

[Lizzie]

Yeah. I'm just saying, why is it okay for Bhad Bhabie to be tits out and trending, but when I dress as a woman on YouTube, I get demonet.

[Marcus]

Yeah. That's crazy.

[Lizzie]

So I'm just saying, were your balls out?

[Marcus]

Our balls. Worse than tits.

[Lizzie]

My balls were.

[Marcus]

Now, I think the threat was that a ball was out. Maybe if memory serves, you just have a ball loose. It does sound violently out of character. But it's also like when you take yourself back to that silver outfit, was a ball loose? I also, it might have been me because I was like, I'm going to wear black underpants under this nude troll. Because somewhere, sometime on some stupid show, I heard someone say, like, you're supposed to wear black under nude and white because it showseless. It's. No one's ever said that.

[Lizzie]

Not a soul has ever said that. Wanted death to every other woman.

[Marcus]

Literally.

[Lizzie]

She is not a woman's woman.

[Marcus]

So the backstory and the reason why Bhad Bhabie wrote the diss track and put out the diss track, Ms. Whitman, which was a slap in the face of Ms. Alabama Barker, who is the child of Travis Barker stepdaughter, Kourtney Kardashian. No, stepdaughter of Kourtney Kardashian. Apparently at some point in time, Alabama Barker decided to sleep with Bhad Bhabie's baby daddy. And the baby daddy seems like a real rancid piece of shit. And both of these girls are very upset with each other now over it. And they've been hurling insults back and forth on the Internet and on the grammar. And so Alabama released a diss track in response to a Bhad Bhabi diss track. And then Bhad Bhabie released Ms. Whitman.

[Lizzie]

I would not fuck with Bhad Bhabie.

[Marcus]

I honestly would not either. Because I don't think Bhad Bhabie has ever given a fudge.

[Lizzie]

No. And I honestly respect her for that. I've found a lot of her songs catchy.

[Marcus]

And we've been walking around the house going, damn, Alabama all weekend.

[Lizzie]

40?

[Marcus]

Yeah, just 40 something. And I'm 35, breastfeeding a whole ass child sitting there. Damn, Alabama, use it trump. What is this? Suck the dick right out my ass. It goes so hard, it's crazy.

[Lizzie]

Well, I wouldn't fuck with her. She is really calm and isn't she dealing?

[Marcus]

She's battling blood cancer and she's postpartum, and she came out with damn, Alabama.

[Lizzie]

So the baby daddy of that baby that she's postpartum for slept with Alabama.

[Marcus]

Barker seems like a real raging piece of shit. And I'm not sure why anybody's fighting for this man. Though I do get the direct insult of we were friends and you sucked the dick right out my ass.

[Lizzie]

Oh, Alabama was friends with Bhad Bhabie.

[Marcus]

Apparently they were like, in each other's DMs. And Alabama was like, who does your wigs, girl? And she's like, oh, this is my wig girl. Girl, go get your girl girl wigs. And they all were trading wig stuff and they were all friends and stuff. And then all of a sudden, Alabama was like, psych, I'm gonna fuck this really nasty guy that you also fuck.

[Lizzie]

That you I mean, she has a baby with. From.

[Marcus]

I don't know that this guy is.

[Lizzie]

Is.

[Marcus]

Conventional in the sense that he considers a baby mama worth respecting. Is that a PC way to put it? Because I also could just say he seems like a real piece of.

[Lizzie]

Right. Damn, Alabama.

[Marcus]

Damn.

[Lizzie]

I haven't even heard the song. What's. What's the moms saying about it? The mom, you like the mommies?

[Marcus]

Like, so Alabama's mom took to TikTok and said, My baby's not a fighter. Don't fight my baby.

[Lizzie]

But she slept with a girl's man, right?

[Marcus]

I'm like, them's fighting moves. She's like. She's like, talking, like, to Danielle's mom, she's like, have your mom catch me outside. She didn't say that, but she should have. And then literally, bad babies, like, you think you so bad. Alabama, catch me at the Calabasas Commons.

[Lizzie]

And I'm like, I'll be there.

[Marcus]

Something is wrong in the world if two girls who are acting like they're down as are gonna go. Go get into a fist fight at the Calabasas Commons where, like, the prettiest.

[Lizzie]

Teenagers that have ever lived are like.

[Marcus]

No one knows that. How to handle that. And also. Oh, I'm gonna not say this next part because it's not okay for me to say. But I would really like to say.

[Lizzie]

The only scary part about the Calabasas comics.

[Marcus]

How fucking Molly whopped Alabama would get if she did show up. And she was, like, trying to act like this is still a stunt. And Bhad Bhabie's just like, no, I'm gonna beat the brakes off you, bitch. Are you kidding me?

[Lizzie]

While she's going through, she will beat.

[Marcus]

The shit out of you. And it's because she's actually down to throw some punches, and you are not. Like, this is not a game, Alabama. She did not come to play.

[Lizzie]

Bad baby might reside in Calabasas, but she can fight a bit.

[Marcus]

She will fudgeing kill you. And the other thing that's so nuts is she does not give a fuck, dude. She does not give a. She's never, ever given a fuck in her life. And it seems like you give a lot of dude she had.

[Lizzie]

Are we allowed bad babies? Edge of age is Alabama Barker.

[Marcus]

Yeah, I believe Alabama Barker is of age because she and her father are sharing lingerie photos of her on the Internet. So I'm assuming they're both of, like, she's of age.

[Lizzie]

Okay, well, we might run into them. And I love pretty teens that Intimidate us in Calabasas. They're not.

[Marcus]

They don't know it's us. Watch all of the negative comments on our podcast reviewer, Alabama Barker. She's like that fat postpartum.

[Lizzie]

She tries to sleep with your baby daddy.

[Marcus]

Can you imagine? Damn, Alabama. Honestly, the way I'd be a little bit like, I've made it. I would be so validated if Alabama tried to my man. And that's so sad. So she's really won this round between us. But Bhad Bhabie is gonna end the whole conversation. And then Bhad Baby's Ms. Whitman has like a verse in it or a beat or something or whatever from Kanye. And Kanye was like, damn, this goes so hard. Like, hell yeah. And then Travis Barker called Kanye and was like, do you know what this is about? And Kanye was like, no, I don't know what this is about. And then Travis told him about all the drama, and ye had to get on Instagram and be like, I didn't know. Listen, I just say yes to everything because people say no to me for. So I'm just trying to use the golden rule. And in so doing, I might have accidentally said something nasty about a couple of children that are part of my family.

[Lizzie]

I'm shocked that that's what he's apologizing for.

[Marcus]

Honestly, it's the most rational that man has been in a long time.

[Lizzie]

I think he has some other things to apologize for.

[Marcus]

Absolutely.

[Lizzie]

I just think it's odd that that's what he's coming to the Instagram to Crazy nuts. I think you should pick up your phone for some other things.

[Marcus]

But I also love that Alabama's out in these. The streets, someone else's baby daddy, and then being like, dad, can you come help me on the Internet? Because I'm getting some served to me, and I can't take it. And then he's like, yes, I respect Travis.

[Lizzie]

He's been through a lot. Okay, okay, we're being nice until we get to the Oscar. All right, girls, Today's podcast is sponsored by SeatGeek.

[Vicki]

And in this new year, I encourage.

[Lizzie]

You to get out of your house.

[Vicki]

Sometimes if you're in a funk, just changing the energy changes everything.

[Lizzie]

And that's why I'm so excited to talk to you about SeatGeek.

[Vicki]

Because they help you get out of the house. They have over 28 million downloads, making SeatGeek the number one rated ticketing app. And to celebrate the new year, SeatGeek gave us a special hookup where anyone can use our code the ZIP10 for 10% off their next purchase on SeatGeek. There are more than 70,000 events listed on SeatGeek, including concerts, sports, festivals, comedy, and more. Right now, you can use our code to get tickets to the recently announced Kendrick Lamar and SZA or Post Malone tours. Plus, there are so many artists that are about to go on sale. I've used SeatGeek for years. I've gone to Taylor Swift, I've gone to Sabrina Carpenter. I've gone to baseball games. I've gone to football games. Literally anything and everything you can get a ticket for. I have gotten one for myself on SeatGeek. SeatGeek is also looking out for you. Each ticket is rated rated on a scale of 1 to 10, so you know that you're getting a good deal. Look for the green dots. Green means good, red means bad, and every ticket is backed by their buyer guarantee, so don't wait.

[Lizzie]

Take out your phone, open the SeatGeek.

[Vicki]

App, and add code the SIP10 to your account to make sure you get 10% off your next set of tickets. That's code the SIP10 for 10% off.

[Lizzie]

Any tickets on SeatGeek.

[Vicki]

Or you can click the link in the description to download the app and have the code automatically added to your account so that you can use it later. Thank you, seatgeek. We love you.

[Marcus]

So what was my intention?

[Lizzie]

Oh, you didn't set one. Let's do it right now. Your boobs look great today.

[Marcus]

Thanks. They're full of meal.

[Lizzie]

The ruching is really nice.

[Marcus]

Thank you.

[Lizzie]

Like, the girls wear that on their ass.

[Marcus]

Now, that style, I should probably wear it on my stomach, which is looking a lot like an ass these days. Oh, my gosh.

[Lizzie]

Okay. Do you have any other things that you want to talk about before we get to our official review?

[Marcus]

Yes. Oh, yes, I do.

[Lizzie]

Okay.

[Marcus]

Okay. Everybody's always like, just wait, girl, till your postpartum and your hair starts falling out. It's crazy. It is crazy. My hair is coming out in handfuls. And I put it on the wall in my shower the other day, and it looked like a ghost washing her hands. And then I thought of Moaning Myrtle, the character from Harry Potter. That's not the point of this whole conversation. I will say this. I was like, damn, my temples be looking crazy. I've been sending you pictures of my temples. Like, I'll zoom in on a picture.

[Lizzie]

Temple. Temple.

[Marcus]

It's this part, like, right here.

[Lizzie]

Don't touch my hair.

[Marcus]

I'm not touching your temples. Like, right here. Oh, but it's like my hairline has receded back to here because I've. All of this hair fell out.

[Lizzie]

You're so lucky that you can cover it up.

[Marcus]

No, but wait for this. It's growing back in. And now I have new growth all over my head. And my hairdresser was showing me, and she's like, yeah, look at this. When I pull your hair back, you have little inch long hairs all over the place. And I was like, this is not the look. It literally looks like I, like, shaved right here a little bit, and then it's growing in all up. It's like when I tried to light a cigarette over a stove in my college graduation and burnt the front of my hair and it just had little tiny hairs all over the top of my head. And it's just like, when. When will I be rewarded for motherhood? Like, where's the prize? Is it the baby? Is it just the baby?

[Lizzie]

You love the baby.

[Marcus]

I love the baby. But why is this happening to me? Like, what does. Does Hailey Bieber also have.

[Lizzie]

No, no, she doesn't.

[Marcus]

See, what is that? Why is it me and not Hailey Bieber?

[Lizzie]

She doesn't deal with any of this.

[Marcus]

God damn.

[Lizzie]

She has to deal with Justin but nothing else.

[Marcus]

You know what? And she doesn't even seem to mind.

[Lizzie]

No, she just showed up to the Vanity Fair party looking like a snack.

[Marcus]

Yeah, she's delicious. I wish she would, like, not one.

[Lizzie]

Time just not be so delicious all the time.

[Marcus]

Haley, just eat last less. You know what I'm saying? And I don't mean food. I mean like, looks.

[Lizzie]

Yeah, yeah, we know. Leave. We're Gen Z, Haley adjacent.

[Marcus]

Leave some crumbs, perhaps. Do not cook. No one in our audience is young enough to get how funny all of that was. And that wasn't a diss to you guys. I love us. I love us. It's okay. Just write it in a nasty review that Ryan will start next show with.

[Lizzie]

No, I'll never read the nasty reviews ever again.

[Marcus]

I want that in writing.

[Lizzie]

Okay. Costco or Oscar review?

[Marcus]

Oh, my God, let's go to the Oscar review because the guy at Costco really hurt my feelings.

[Lizzie]

Oh, and you just can't deal with that today?

[Marcus]

No, it's not the day.

[Lizzie]

Normally you're strong enough for it.

[Marcus]

I know, but it's like, add in the menstruation. Like, not all women you've been menstruating for a concerning amount of time do is menstruate. I went to a baby party this weekend, and all the moms are in the group chat, like, I'm bringing this, I'm bringing that. And I was like, I'm bringing a heavy flow and a bad attitude. They're like, ah. One of them was like, are you okay? And I was like, no, are you? And she was like, we're thriving over here.

[Lizzie]

I'm sorry I hurt your feelings earlier.

[Marcus]

You know what? Thank you so much. And I'm sorry.

[Lizzie]

I think it's going to come across really nasty on my end and people are going to be really mad at me.

[Marcus]

I think people are going to be really mad at me for not directly engaging and being passive aggressive and for that.

[Lizzie]

I think you weren't passive aggressive. I think it was direct. Direct.

[Marcus]

Oh, you do?

[Lizzie]

Yeah, you. You set a very stern boundary with me, and I crossed it.

[Chris]

Anyways.

[Marcus]

I would like to applaud you for coming to this conclusion so quickly because usually it's like a 5am thing for you the next day. Maybe. If. If at all.

[Lizzie]

Okay, let's review some Oscar fashion, please. Did you watch any of the Oscars?

[Marcus]

Fuck, no.

[Lizzie]

I watched the first five minutes. Minutes. And until I got bored. Listen, and I will say the best bit was Conan coming out of Demi Moore's. What's that movie called?

[Marcus]

Salutations?

[Lizzie]

No, Substance. Substance, Body. Did you watch the Substance?

[Marcus]

Not far enough to know what that meant.

[Lizzie]

Oh, well, the younger version of her crawls out of her own body. It's very graphic. And so Conan O'Brien starts the show by coming out of Demi Moore's body.

[Marcus]

That's really funny.

[Lizzie]

It all went downhill from there. I really was like, this is really funny.

[Marcus]

Yeah.

[Lizzie]

And then the rest of it was. I had to go.

[Marcus]

I just.

[Lizzie]

I think unless you've seen every movie, I. If I had seen all the movies, I would have been engaged. But having only seen, like, 2% of the movies, I can't.

[Marcus]

It felt like the only fun movie was Wicked, and I'm a little too postpartum for any of this. Like, I watched a good part of Substance, but, like, being in this mental headspace is like. Like, not easy to consume much. So if it's not pure joy for me, I can't do it.

[Lizzie]

I did stay for the opening act of. I. I stayed for the opening act of Ariana and Cynthia Arivo.

[Marcus]

Yeah.

[Lizzie]

Oh, my God. Yeah, that.

[Marcus]

Which one? Both those.

[Lizzie]

Cynthia.

[Marcus]

Yeah.

[Lizzie]

She sound exactly like the movie.

[Marcus]

Well, that's her in the movie.

[Lizzie]

I know, but this was her moment to, like, prove, like. Yeah, I know. I was. Because, I mean, there's a Backing track that she's lip singing when she's doing all the acrobatics.

[Marcus]

Right.

[Lizzie]

This was her moment to show, like, I am that bitch, and I can do this live. And it sounded to a T, exact and perfect. Wow. I had chills.

[Marcus]

You gave me chills.

[Lizzie]

I was like, this is that. It was powerful. And it's all I think anyone needs from the Oscars is that moment of her just going, wow, I like that.

[Marcus]

I also liked Kieran Culkin's speech.

[Lizzie]

Oh, what about it?

[Marcus]

So Kieran Culkin apparently, like, won an Emmy or something a year ago, and his wife was like, I'll give you baby number four when you win an Oscar. And he's like, here it is. Let's go. Baby number four. Ye of little faith. And I loved it. I thought it was funny.

[Lizzie]

That is really cute.

[Marcus]

He seems insufferable.

[Lizzie]

Why do you.

[Marcus]

No, listen, let me finish. Let me finish.

[Lizzie]

That's. I don't. Okay.

[Marcus]

He seems insufferable. Like me.

[Lizzie]

Oh, got it.

[Marcus]

And I like that.

[Lizzie]

Got it.

[Marcus]

I like a little insufferability.

[Lizzie]

I see what you're saying. It's charming.

[Marcus]

Is it? But it's, you know, like, it's. It's not for some people. It's not for most people, but it is for us people.

[Lizzie]

Right. And because of the iPad died.

[Marcus]

There goes the dog.

[Lizzie]

There goes everything we ever have. This show's improv, anyways. Can't you tell?

[Marcus]

Yes. And I also loved when Adam Sandler was in the audience dressed in his basketball shorts and his Aviator Nation, and then he went up to Timothee Chalamet, grabbed him, and went. I think that was a really solid continuation of that bit.

[Lizzie]

And where did that start?

[Marcus]

I believe it started with Nikki Glaser at a previous award show that I also did not.

[Lizzie]

I watched her opening monologue. Her opening monologue was better than Conan's opening model.

[Marcus]

Nikki Glaser is very funny, and I wish that she just wore a little. No, I'm gonna take it all back. Nikki, you do you. A brand's a brand. I don't have one, so I can't appreciate.

[Lizzie]

I appreciate her.

[Marcus]

I really do.

[Lizzie]

I really do. I thought she really came to serve entertainment in her opening model.

[Marcus]

Everything that she does, she's serving.

[Lizzie]

She really is. Okay, so on your phone, I put. Because really, the fun ones happen at the Vanity Fair party, right? On mine, you have the actual Oscars. Let's just start with Timothy. Timothy Chalamet looking like a highlighter. Looking like jeans.

[Marcus]

He's giving Easter.

[Lizzie]

I really just.

[Marcus]

I like it. It's bold, it's beautiful, it's unique.

[Lizzie]

It's 2 Gen Z for me. See where we're getting the baggie of the pants at the bottom?

[Marcus]

Like this is not the Gen Z.

[Lizzie]

Pants getting clumpage at the bottom of the pants. The fit is fine. You know what I will give him? He is one of the men that is worth talking about because it's not just a boring snore fest suit. Yeah.

[Marcus]

He's always giving us something to talk about.

[Lizzie]

At least it's something interesting.

[Marcus]

I think it's mad cool. It's like a casual pant, but a tuxedo top and a little brochure instead of a tie.

[Lizzie]

And I will give him. He has the confidence. Confidence to wear the look.

[Marcus]

Yes.

[Lizzie]

You know what I'm saying?

[Marcus]

Yes.

[Lizzie]

If I put that look on, I would drown in the look because I could not feel confident in that look. And he is eating the look.

[Marcus]

You know what? I love it.

[Lizzie]

Okay.

[Marcus]

Okay.

[Lizzie]

I'll give it a passing grade as well. Elle Fanning serves something, but it's not for me.

[Marcus]

Elle Fanning's giving Grammy.

[Lizzie]

She is giving. She's giving.

[Marcus]

She's given Nana's curtains.

[Lizzie]

Could you share the photos with me too?

[Marcus]

No.

[Lizzie]

It works.

[Marcus]

You see Nana's curtains, It's very like the tiny watch. Like that's a grandma ass watch. And then this like lace. It's the Grammys curtains.

[Lizzie]

It's very. I'm 80 years old, but still looking fabulous. And I love Nicole Kidman.

[Marcus]

This is like kind of the tone and vibe of a lot of people's looks to like, even Mickey whatever, who won for an aura. Her dress to me was giving the same sort of vibe. Like we would find both of these dresses on the same mood board. Board. And I don't like the mood board.

[Lizzie]

Grandma chic.

[Marcus]

It's like. Oh, it's like almost like 50s meets. Like 2008 homecoming. Like, if this was a short dress, you would have seen it on my peers at homecoming.

[Lizzie]

I feel as though it's grandma's curtains reimagined. Oh, Cynthia does. Cynthia and I can appreciate her for that.

[Marcus]

But do we think she's a higher being singing?

[Lizzie]

Yes. Like, once I saw her singing live, I thought she is better than all of us.

[Marcus]

Yeah.

[Lizzie]

You know what I'm saying?

[Marcus]

I. I do not personally identify with an any part of her look.

[Lizzie]

I do not love her looks, but I can appreciate how uniquely her they are. And I think she rocks them. Ariana looks like a lampshade, and I won't take it back.

[Marcus]

And you don't have to.

[Lizzie]

I think think her performance dress was better. That paid homage to the. Yeah, with the red slipper on the back. It's interesting.

[Marcus]

I didn't like her performance look either, to be honest with you.

[Lizzie]

It looks like a lampshade.

[Marcus]

I think this is kind of cool. I think this is kind of cool. Both her and Cynthia are giving District one.

[Lizzie]

What does that mean?

[Marcus]

Don't worry about it.

[Lizzie]

Okay. Keep going.

[Marcus]

Who is this? Halle Berry. Berry.

[Lizzie]

Yes.

[Marcus]

Halle Berry's fit is cool.

[Lizzie]

It's cool.

[Marcus]

It's very cool. But I also. Never mind. I'm not gonna bring it up because it upsets the people who listen to this podcast.

[Lizzie]

What do you mean?

[Marcus]

I was gonna say Taylor Swift wearing that disco ball dress that one time kind of, like, alienates anybody else from wearing another.

[Lizzie]

Oh, it was hers. Better than that.

[Marcus]

No, this is arguably better than that.

[Lizzie]

I really love how this accentuates her form. Like, I love how the top meets the bottom and then really rounds out her hips.

[Marcus]

It's very. It's way better than the dress that Taylor Swift wore. And maybe it's just me who thinks of Taylor Swift and all things.

[Lizzie]

The jewelry and the hair is also perfect. I think this is stunning.

[Marcus]

This is gorgeous.

[Lizzie]

I am really a big fan of this.

[Marcus]

You know what? I will take back what I said about you can't wear disco ball stuff. This is obviously more elevated and interesting, and I love it.

[Lizzie]

Wow.

[Marcus]

Why do you keep trying to see these?

[Lizzie]

Look, I'm so obsessed.

[Marcus]

Why do you think you're entitled to seeing them?

[Lizzie]

Okay. Selena Gomez. I like where they were going. I hate the sleeves. It looks like it wasn't finished. It just doesn't look like it sits right or where it's supposed to be sitting. As opposed to. She got her Vanity Fair look right.

[Marcus]

Hold on.

[Lizzie]

We're getting. I'm not. I'm just saying, like, why? While I do not appreciate this in its entirety, I do think what she did at the Vanity's Fair party party was incredible.

[Marcus]

I think this look is glamour and flattering and dope and makes me feel like she's, like, a glamour night.

[Lizzie]

I like where it was go. I like it from the hips down. I really just can't get past where the sleeves fall.

[Marcus]

The sleeves. It looks very uncomfortable. It's not something I would have worn because I would have been, like, having a sensory overload with how the sleeves are cutting.

[Lizzie]

You take it from the boobs. Down. I would give it a 10. I really.

[Marcus]

From the boobs down. Is that the title of your memoir?

[Lizzie]

And I. I do like her hair, her makeup, and her jewels. It's the sleeves. I fucking hate the sleeves.

[Marcus]

I think it's classic and timeless, and.

[Lizzie]

I think the sleeves are a crime. I. I think the stylist crime. A crime. Because she.

[Marcus]

You think that's a crime?

[Lizzie]

I think she looks stunning. Except for where the sleeves fall.

[Marcus]

Okay.

[Lizzie]

It just really bothers me.

[Marcus]

Okay.

[Lizzie]

Otherwise, she knocked it out of the park. Demi Moore, I think, looks good. I think Halle Berry's mirror look was a little better.

[Marcus]

You get to take the. This up. How did you get this? You get to hold the Vanity Fair looks.

[Lizzie]

Why can't we both.

[Marcus]

No, we don't both get to see. It's fine.

[Lizzie]

It's good.

[Marcus]

I do not like it.

[Lizzie]

Oh, why?

[Marcus]

I'm not a sequin girl. This is a lot of sequins.

[Lizzie]

So was. What?

[Marcus]

I'm. Who am I kidding? I'm a sequin girl. I love sequins. I don't like this.

[Lizzie]

Okay, let's keep going.

[Marcus]

Oh, who is that?

[Lizzie]

That's. I just thought you'd be nasty because it's Lily Rose Depp. It's really not Oscar appropriate. No, it's really just not where.

[Marcus]

It's almost like she got it at American Apparel the day before.

[Lizzie]

She could have gone to the Vanity Fair party like that. But I don't think it's appropriate for the Oscars. Miley Cyrus is looking fine. Like, not great. Not. I mean, not.

[Marcus]

Are those pockets or gloves?

[Lizzie]

Gloves.

[Marcus]

Well, tilt it towards me.

[Lizzie]

It's not really a standout for me, but it's doing nothing wrong. You know, it's committing no crime.

[Marcus]

I don't like her pale eyebrows. Brows.

[Lizzie]

I don't like her hair. I don't like how the stylist did her hair here. Doja kid.

[Marcus]

I think I just don't understand high fashion glamour moments.

[Lizzie]

Right.

[Marcus]

I think it's just not something I can comprehend.

[Lizzie]

I'm gonna say something unpopular, that she.

[Marcus]

Looks like Rose from the Titanic.

[Lizzie]

Zoe Saldana did not wear an outfit to win the Oscar, and she won the Oscar. I think she's gonna look back and be like, wow, I shouldn't have wore that to win the Oscar.

[Marcus]

Can you show me?

[Lizzie]

It really just doesn't do it for me.

[Marcus]

None of these work for me, but it's because I don't. I don't know, like. You know what I mean? Like, I'm like, I don't Even know how to wear normal people clothes right now. I hate this.

[Lizzie]

Who is this doja cat? I can appreciate it for what it is.

[Marcus]

Really?

[Lizzie]

Yeah, I really can. Okay. I like a leopard print and it's kind of sparkly and fun. Let me see how many more there are of these, because we also have to put all these on the screen. So it's like, oh, oh, my. Winner of the night is honestly Lupita Nyong'o. I think this is what you wear to win an Oscar. And I don't know if she won an Oscar, but she should have just for the way she showed up to this carpet. I think elegant.

[Marcus]

Was she even? No, There was no chance. She was just a guest.

[Lizzie]

I don't care. They should have given her something.

[Marcus]

Oh, my God.

[Lizzie]

She won the night. I think it's. It's event appropriate. I think it fits perfectly. I really do. I love everything about her. Look, look it. It's interesting. It fits right. It falls in the right places. It's perfect for the event. I think she wins.

[Marcus]

Listen, I hate Andrew Garfield and I love his chocolatey look.

[Lizzie]

The only two men that were notable to talk about were Andrew Garfield. Because I'm loving the espresso chocolate brown. It's so yummy. I want all my rugs in my house to be that color. Now. I just am really into it. And no, not because of him, just in general right now. I've been loving. Loving espresso.

[Vicki]

Yes.

[Lizzie]

I've been loving it.

[Marcus]

Yeah.

[Lizzie]

Maybe Sabrina turned me on to it. Who could ever say? Okay, lastly, we're gonna do some of the looks from the Vanity Fair.

[Marcus]

I just really don't think I get it.

[Lizzie]

Okay, Kendall Jenner. I like. Other than the sleeves. Let me see the sleeves. Just like. I think I hate it, actually.

[Marcus]

I hate it.

[Lizzie]

I hate it. Sydney Sweeney. She's just a movie star. It's like a tacky prom dress that fits perfect. Do you know what I'm saying?

[Marcus]

Oh, it's a very tacky prom dress. And it does fit perfect.

[Lizzie]

It fits perfect.

[Marcus]

It's fun.

[Lizzie]

And she shows up and it's just like there's something about her with her hair and her makeup. It's fresh. Like she looks like she just.

[Marcus]

I don't give a. I'm here to rage.

[Lizzie]

And she. But looking like she just walked out of a Neutrogena ad.

[Marcus]

Yes.

[Lizzie]

It's like so clean, Dewey. So perfect. It's like that's an AI version of a person. Do you know what I'm saying?

[Marcus]

Yeah, she's a hottie.

[Lizzie]

She's a hottie body. Oh, who is that? Ms. Julia Fox.

[Marcus]

Why is she. Oh, that's hair. That looks like my shower wall. And my postpartum hair loss. That is covered in Moaning Myrtle Rorschach. Hair loss.

[Lizzie]

And then I think my favorite from the Vanity Fair party was Jenna. Jenny. Jenna. Jenna Ortega. Jenna Ortega.

[Marcus]

Can I see it?

[Lizzie]

I think it's like she just walked out of the sea looking fabulous.

[Marcus]

Oh, damn, that is cool.

[Lizzie]

Like, the hair is perfect for the look. It fits her wonderfully.

[Marcus]

I like her a lot. And I'm also a little disturbed by her because she eats a kiwi, like an apple with the skin.

[Lizzie]

No.

[Marcus]

Yeah.

[Lizzie]

Where did you see that?

[Marcus]

She posted it on the Internet.

[Lizzie]

You're kidding me.

[Marcus]

No.

[Lizzie]

Should I start doing that because Jenna started doing that?

[Marcus]

Maybe? Because kiwis seems like a lot of fiber to digest.

[Lizzie]

I'm into kiwis lately.

[Marcus]

Oh, really?

[Lizzie]

And the vitamin C, it's really annoying to like, because how do you eat a kiwi? Spoon it out. Is that what you do?

[Marcus]

Yeah, I kind of spoon it out.

[Lizzie]

Because that's what I've been doing too. But when you spoon it out, half the juice leaks out, and I wanted that juice.

[Marcus]

Here's another thing I think I was thinking about trying with a kiwi is cutting it. Cutting it in forts and then scooping it out.

[Lizzie]

I think I'm gonna try what she does and just eat the skin. What if the skin's good?

[Marcus]

I bet it's not.

[Lizzie]

It has peach fuzz on it.

[Marcus]

It's more than peach fuzz. It's like your beard.

[Lizzie]

Well, she won the night. She won the night.

[Marcus]

How many women can win the night?

[Lizzie]

No, Jenna won Vanity Fair. Party.

[Marcus]

Okay. Lupita.

[Lizzie]

Lupita won the Oscar. The Oscar?

[Marcus]

Red carpet, the whole night, period. Best Picture. Lupita.

[Lizzie]

Well, we're talking two separate. The whole night. Lupita. If we're separating events. Jenna.

[Marcus]

Okay.

[Lizzie]

Vanity Fair.

[Marcus]

Awesome.

[Lizzie]

Lupita.

[Marcus]

Now there's categories.

[Lizzie]

Well, yeah, it's two different events.

[Marcus]

Okay, that's fair.

[Lizzie]

And if we're picking a loser of the night who's actually a winner because she won big, it's Zoe Saldana. Even her Vanity Fair look was a crime.

[Marcus]

Yeah, a.

[Lizzie]

Her looks were a crime. And I appreciate you. I think you're talented. I. I haven't seen your movie.

[Marcus]

Legend. You're beautiful.

[Lizzie]

I'm glad you won the Oscar, but your outfits suck. You need to find a new stylist.

[Marcus]

Who's that? Show me.

[Lizzie]

It's not for me. It's baggy. It's boring. It's not.

[Marcus]

Girl, this is. You're mad at him for being too much, and now you're mad at him for being too little.

[Lizzie]

It's baggy. It's boring. It's not.

[Marcus]

It is not.

[Lizzie]

It's boring. It's boring. It's not unique.

[Marcus]

It's not boring.

[Lizzie]

It's boring. Okay? And then let's just look at Kim. Because she looks like my bedding.

[Marcus]

Wanna him. And you won't admit it publicly.

[Lizzie]

She, Kim, looks like my bedding after it gets out of the wash. Yeah, awful, period. The fit is good. And her body looks sickening.

[Marcus]

I tried on a wedding dress like that.

[Lizzie]

I hate it.

[Marcus]

Here's the thing. When I was trying on wedding dresses, I was like, I want to find a dress that I can only wear at my wedding. And then I was thinking, like, where would I ever wear this wedding? This dress? Selena Gomez Oscars. Because it's like, I'm going, she did that, right?

[Lizzie]

That fits Selena, right? This is where Selena came to shine.

[Marcus]

Okay.

[Lizzie]

Oh, my gosh. Not I.

[Marcus]

Show me again.

[Lizzie]

I'm really into Selena Gomez.

[Marcus]

You're only giving me glances.

[Lizzie]

It's so good.

[Marcus]

It is good.

[Lizzie]

It's so good. If you're gonna do sequins, do what Selena Gomez did at the Vanity Fair party. Oh, my God. And then last but not least, Ms. Sarah Paulson trying to do the damn thing. Okay, we'll see you guys.

[Marcus]

She's giving inflatable life raft. Not even vest raft. She is the raft.

[Lizzie]

She doesn't need my pool fence.

[Marcus]

She's the emergency slide that comes out when you kick the door open in of a Waterland.

[Lizzie]

Okay, see you guys later.

[Marcus]

Bye.

[Vicki]

Missing out on a show that everyone.

[Lizzie]

Is talking about just isn't an option for me.

[Vicki]

I'm constantly signing up for this streaming service or that one. And then a few months later, I realize I've still been paying for the service, even though I realize I'm no longer watching a show there. So getting Rocket Money was definitely a game changer for me. They find unwanted subscriptions and help you cancel them so that you never have to worry about those subscriptions subscriptions slipping through the cracks. Rocket Money is a personal finance app that helps you find and cancel your unwanted subscriptions, monitors your spending, and helps you lower your bills so that you can grow your savings. With Rocket Money, I have a clear picture of where my money is going. Their dashboard is incredible and gives you a clear view of your expenses across all of your accounts. I can see my credit card, my debit card, my business account, my personal account. And what's incredible is I can see everything that's coming in versus everything that's going out. And the more I look, the more conscious I am of what's going on, which then makes me spend less. It's incredible. They have a new goals feature that automatically saves money for you so that you don't have to think about it. You can pay off credit card debt, put away money for a house, or just build your savings. Rocket Money makes it easy. You can also create personalized budgets. And you'll get alerts if a bill increases in price, if there's unusual spending activity, or if you're getting close to going over your budget. Rocket Money has over 5 million users and has saved a total, a total of 500 million in canceled subscriptions, saving members up to 740 a year when using all of the app's premium features. So cancel your unwanted subscriptions and reach your financial goals faster with Rocket Money. Go to RocketMoney.com sip today.

[Lizzie]

That's RocketMoney.com sip RocketMoney.com sip okay, welcome.

[Morgan]

Sick.

[Lizzie]

We have Elizabeth Gordon, Vicki Adams, Morgan Adams, myself and Chris. We're all at Domino's. We're going to try some viral pizza. My husband told me about it. And just get the rest of the stuff on the menu. That looks delicious. I don't think I've ever had their cheese crust. The stuffed cheese crust.

[Morgan]

That is really.

[Lizzie]

I don't think so. We'll just get anything and everything that we want.

[Chris]

Well, they also have the cookies now, too.

[Lizzie]

Well, we're gonna get it all.

[Marcus]

He said anything and everything.

[Lizzie]

I said anything and everything you want.

[Morgan]

What then you're going to get up.

[Lizzie]

Oh, wow. There's a jack in the box right here, too.

[Shane]

That's the jack box I used to.

[Lizzie]

Go to in high school. Really? It's been there all this time? How about the dominoes?

[Marcus]

All this time.

[Lizzie]

All this time. I mean, he's old.

[Shane]

I mean, I'm very He.

[Lizzie]

James. His.

[Marcus]

He's old enough to bleach his own ass.

[Lizzie]

We just learned on the after sip that both Morgan and Chris take a razor to their.

[Marcus]

I don't think.

[Chris]

I think that you're in the minority. I think that most people who want to be clean for their mans do that. Your boyfriend?

[Marcus]

My husband hasn't seen my butthole ever. No, that's my own business.

[Lizzie]

Well, I guess. What if he's hitting it from the Back.

[Marcus]

Why would I ever let him do that?

[Lizzie]

No, like, the front, but from the. Like.

[Morgan]

Okay, I'll be inside.

[Chris]

I think that it's just a part of every person's maintenance routine. And it's not a wild, crazy thing. It's just, like, when I shave my arm, I'm like, thank you.

[Shane]

Because they're always making me feel crazy. So I really appreciate.

[Chris]

Chris, you're not crazy. We're looking out for other people and how they perceive us.

[Lizzie]

I just start. Okay. I just started thinking, oh, my God. Domino's has what Subway has. That's crazy. And then I realized she was in there the whole time. Wait, so is the fear. I don't want to ask that to my sister. Never mind.

[Morgan]

You guys just.

[Chris]

Yes, I read his mind. The feeling fear is that my boyfriend would look at my butthole and be like, why is it fuzzy? And I don't want that.

[Lizzie]

But I was. It's a little too much. I'll ask Lizzy. Does your boyfriend do anything my level? No, we're at Domino's. Can everyone just be polite? We're in public. Yes.

[Chris]

It's normal for your boyfriend to see your butt queen.

[Lizzie]

Okay.

[Shane]

Are you recording on that, kid?

[Lizzie]

Yes.

[Shane]

Let me record here.

[Marcus]

The pizza man's here two, take one.

[Lizzie]

Common mark. I'm gonna try to go a little closer.

[Marcus]

Wow. Porsche Apocalyptic cutlery.

[Lizzie]

Okay, so they did not have plates, but the guy in there was so nice, and he did hook us up with these.

[Marcus]

Nice.

[Morgan]

Did he recognize you?

[Marcus]

Probably not.

[Vicki]

Probably not.

[Chris]

Maybe.

[Marcus]

Yeah.

[Chris]

Because he was probably like, you think he's a chugger?

[Lizzie]

Oh, yes.

[Marcus]

You think he's a chugger.

[Lizzie]

As we left, he didn't just recognize. He chugs.

[Morgan]

The people didn't recognize me.

[Chris]

Dildo cameras that you guys use freak me out. It's so spooky the way it follows you.

[Lizzie]

Okay, so this first one, I believe, is the tick. The viral TikTok order that all the girlies are getting. I'll put it on the screen, what they're getting. Let's see. Oh. Oh, no. This is the Stuffed Preps. Dang. Is this the one?

[Marcus]

It must be, right? Is it not what it is?

[Lizzie]

Okay.

[Marcus]

Three, two. Oh, shit.

[Lizzie]

Is it beautiful?

[Marcus]

It smells so good.

[Lizzie]

It's pretty beautiful. Then what's this one?

[Marcus]

The salivation happening in my mouth.

[Lizzie]

Oh, that's the brownie.

[Marcus]

Holy shit. Look at this.

[Lizzie]

And Morgan told us.

[Vicki]

Oh, wait.

[Lizzie]

Did we get loaded tots? Oh, my God, the loaded tots look right.

[Morgan]

I like tots.

[Lizzie]

Those look fresh to death.

[Chris]

No, One talks about.

[Lizzie]

Do you guys want to grab a few tots? Oh, yeah.

[Chris]

No one talks about Domino's in the way that they should because of that, the tots and the formation of a pizza.

[Lizzie]

Crazy.

[Chris]

Innovation.

[Shane]

I've never seen that.

[Lizzie]

That is innovation. Oh, my God.

[Chris]

I'm getting the ones in the middle for sure.

[Shane]

Oh, my God, the cheese.

[Lizzie]

Oh, wow, look at that.

[Marcus]

Look at. Oh.

[Morgan]

Oh, thanks for messing them up.

[Lizzie]

That and a shaved butthole.

[Marcus]

What?

[Morgan]

What is about a date night?

[Chris]

Happy Feb.

[Morgan]

They need to stop. Oh, he had forks.

[Chris]

Here you go, Chris.

[Marcus]

What is the actual order of the viral.

[Lizzie]

Oh, I'll look that up while they're getting situated with their.

[Morgan]

Did he give you enough forks or.

[Lizzie]

No, I need a fork.

[Marcus]

No, there's a fork on the floor.

[Lizzie]

No, take it. Mom, I had that one. Lizzie.

[Marcus]

I just can't reach it.

[Morgan]

Do you need it, Ryan?

[Lizzie]

I'm fine, Mom. Okay, so this viral pizza that we're about to try is a pan pizza with extra cheese, garlic, parmesan sauce, Philly steak, and bacon. And I'll put on screen how you order it, because you get the parmesan.

[Vicki]

Sauce instead of the marinara sauce.

[Lizzie]

And I guess it's going all kinds of viral.

[Chris]

So someone just created this. It's not like a thing you can just order on the fly.

[Lizzie]

He didn't know what it was, but after I had told it to him, he said, oh, people have been coming in and ordering this, but you have to explain it to them.

[Marcus]

Give me your little plate.

[Lizzie]

I'm just gonna grab one out of the box.

[Marcus]

Go crazy.

[Lizzie]

Yeah. Oh, I want one with a lot of cheese. That might be too much cheese.

[Marcus]

Oh, damn, they slippy. So hot.

[Morgan]

They have. They're stuffed with cheese.

[Lizzie]

Wow.

[Shane]

This is one of the best things I've had on the show.

[Lizzie]

That is so good. That is like drugs.

[Morgan]

That is really good. Who took the time to do that?

[Shane]

That's everything.

[Marcus]

Probably someone on drugs.

[Lizzie]

Seriously, I really do think the marketing teams of all of these people just get really stoned and think, what can we put on the menu to get all the stoners in the world out here?

[Marcus]

Philly cheesesteak with some. Some extra pickles.

[Shane]

This is incredible.

[Lizzie]

I think you guys should run, run, run to Domino's for the cheese sticks Alone.

[Marcus]

No. The load of tots.

[Lizzie]

Yeah, I'm drunk.

[Shane]

You just made my life better.

[Lizzie]

Thank you, Morgan.

[Chris]

You're welcome, Chris.

[Lizzie]

Okay, everybody, take a slice of this. This is the viral one.

[Marcus]

Should I wait?

[Lizzie]

Yeah. And if you want ranch, I have ranch.

[Marcus]

You Crazy.

[Lizzie]

Crazy, huh?

[Morgan]

You crazy, not crazy, right?

[Lizzie]

Did you get yours, Morgan?

[Chris]

Yep. Thank you. Thank you.

[Marcus]

Thank you. Yeah.

[Lizzie]

Thank you. Wow. This does look fantastic. I've never had Philly cheesesteak on a pizza.

[Marcus]

Me neither.

[Lizzie]

Cheers.

[Morgan]

Me neither.

[Marcus]

Oh, my God.

[Morgan]

Cheers to you.

[Marcus]

Oh, my God.

[Lizzie]

Oh, wow. Okay, that's a little too garlicky for me, but.

[Marcus]

What?

[Lizzie]

I don't love garlic.

[Morgan]

Is there a thing?

[Lizzie]

I just feel like I'm gonna be oozing and goozing garlic. Oh, we're gonna.

[Morgan]

Bread last night had lots of garlic.

[Lizzie]

Oh, you need a napkin. Here you go.

[Chris]

I think it is delicious.

[Lizzie]

It's good.

[Marcus]

Delicious. Lacking nutritious, but delicious.

[Shane]

Oh, Is the Domino's always this good?

[Chris]

Kosher sleep.

[Shane]

I don't remember being this.

[Chris]

No. Domino's has been that girl forever.

[Lizzie]

Where do you get your pizza, Chris?

[Shane]

I don't eat a ton of pizza because of all the stuff I have, but.

[Lizzie]

All right.

[Shane]

I honestly went to Pizza Hut a lot in the past.

[Lizzie]

Pizza Hut.

[Marcus]

Oh. I honestly went to Pizza Hut a lot in the past.

[Lizzie]

Wow. I do think the cheese tots are better than this pizza.

[Marcus]

I think both are incredible.

[Chris]

For something different. For a little shake it up moment. It's pretty good.

[Lizzie]

It really is.

[Marcus]

These toppings on the tots would also.

[Lizzie]

They. And they have that, right?

[Marcus]

Probably. Do you want another hot.

[Lizzie]

Yeah, I do. I'm. I'm really getting ready to get that stuffed crust pizza because I've never consumed that from Domino's.

[Chris]

The rust, the way that it's cooked, the thickness, the sauce.

[Lizzie]

Those tots are so good.

[Morgan]

It is so greasy, though.

[Lizzie]

It's gonna make us sick later.

[Marcus]

Probably sooner than later. And I can't stop.

[Lizzie]

Whoa.

[Chris]

Every time I come to stay at your house, I leave 2 inches bigger. I swear to God.

[Marcus]

Me too.

[Morgan]

Then go home, work it off, and.

[Chris]

Come back eight nights in a row.

[Marcus]

Pretty much.

[Lizzie]

Wow. It's the dreams. Yeah, they're isn't really.

[Shane]

I feel like a lot of pizza places are not as cheesy as I would like.

[Morgan]

It is cheesy.

[Lizzie]

Yeah.

[Chris]

They're not shorting you on anything here. They're gonna give you that money.

[Marcus]

Most fragile piece of pizza I've ever tried to grab.

[Lizzie]

I'm gonna pass back to the pepperoni. Oh, you guys aren't ready for the pepperoni?

[Morgan]

Not ready yet, but.

[Lizzie]

Well, I'm going into the stuffed crust with apple.

[Marcus]

Damn it.

[Chris]

You know it's good, cuz we're all eating the full piece.

[Lizzie]

Yeah. Nobody's putting it down. No one's talking it's just a true mukbang.

[Chris]

This is a mukbang.

[Shane]

This is one of the first TikTok things we've tried that's actually delicious.

[Marcus]

Whoa. I don't know if that's true. We love oh tik tok things.

[Shane]

There's not that many that were actually good from tik tok.

[Marcus]

The cheese on the inside of the crust is confusing.

[Lizzie]

I personally like a classic pepperoni pizza better than the viral one. Ew.

[Marcus]

The crust, though, the cheese. The cheese and crust is like an odd.

[Shane]

I love a stuffed crust.

[Morgan]

I love that this pizza has a white sauce. I'm not a red sauce girl on pizza. And it's more like a cream sauce.

[Shane]

I like that too. But also, it's also better for my grid. I'm not supposed to have tomatoes.

[Lizzie]

The cheese. The cheese in the stuffed crutch pizza I think is like a mozzarella. I think it's like a mozzarella.

[Marcus]

Soft. Yeah, it's like soft. Almost like. Like mozzarella.

[Lizzie]

I'm not gonna complain about it. Like, it's better than not having cheese in the crust, but I don't know if it's absolutely necessary.

[Marcus]

Oh, what now? I'm glad we got those waters.

[Lizzie]

Are you ready?

[Chris]

We're ready.

[Shane]

Do you remember why they made stuffed crust pizzas that government?

[Lizzie]

Because they had excess cheese from the Great Depression.

[Marcus]

Yes. Wait, really?

[Lizzie]

Oh, you weren't there. Chris taught us that.

[Marcus]

Oh, wow.

[Lizzie]

I guess the.

[Shane]

So there was so much excess cheese after the Depression. Like, I forget who was President Kennedy. Someone at the time was, like, funding dairy farmers to, like, get extra dairy.

[Marcus]

It was definitely not President Kennedy dumb.

[Shane]

And I don't know how much longer after this was that this happened. I don't know the dates.

[Lizzie]

I don't know.

[Shane]

But whoever was president at the time paid dairy farmers. He paid them, like, extra to. Because they were. It was the Depression. They no money. Long story short, they over delivered. There was way too much cheese. They didn't know what to do with it. They put it in limestone caves in Missouri, I believe.

[Lizzie]

And.

[Marcus]

Yeah. Wow.

[Lizzie]

My mom can't.

[Morgan]

I can't do. Yeah, you might have to tell us.

[Chris]

People have said bully mom specifically on the show, but she was not meant to be a YouTube mom.

[Lizzie]

No. I will tell you. Did Chris get a piece of this? Yes. It's a delic. It really is a delicate dance to, like, eat and have so many people in a car because it's hard. It really is hard to listen, eat, coordinate the food. It's like, what I imagine being on the View is like getting all the chickens their. Their opinions out. You missed the story, mom. Sorry.

[Marcus]

Something about President Kennedy and too much cheese and limes.

[Lizzie]

They haven't. They had an excess in cheese. And so to figure out how to use the cheese, they came up with creative ways, like stuffing it in crust.

[Shane]

They were gifting people huge blocks of government cheese and like low income housing and things like that. And then they were also going to restaurants and being like, we need you to put more cheese on your items and like, figure out how to we have too much cheese, like, help us get rid of it. And so that's like partially how stuffed.

[Lizzie]

Crust pizza came to be. Cheese fan before cheese pizza came to be.

[Morgan]

Wow.

[Lizzie]

Dang. That's incredible. Does anyone want ranch to make it more incredible?

[Chris]

I don't want to spill that because I know I would have a upside down ranch all over the back of this.

[Lizzie]

Dude.

[Marcus]

I'm still loving the viral peets.

[Lizzie]

Really? I didn't even finish mine.

[Marcus]

It is good. It's.

[Chris]

I think I like the viral one more than the pep.

[Marcus]

Same. And if I wasn't so afraid of what's actually in the ingredients, I would eat another slice. Like, I wish it wasn't good.

[Morgan]

Just do it.

[Marcus]

It scares me, Vicky.

[Lizzie]

I like, do it. I like the cheese and the crust, actually.

[Chris]

Have you ever tried to give your babies pizza?

[Lizzie]

No. Oh, I have not yet.

[Marcus]

I wonder if they like it.

[Lizzie]

They will.

[Marcus]

They're like all the things.

[Lizzie]

Except for eggs.

[Marcus]

My baby doesn't like eggs either. He screams at them. I call him scrambled eggs.

[Lizzie]

If we mix them with. If we mix them with cottage cheese, they like it. That's about it.

[Marcus]

Yeah. No, he gets egg sick. He goes and then he screams at them.

[Chris]

I'm sorry, mom. You're a great YouTube mom.

[Lizzie]

No, it's okay. No, it's difficult.

[Morgan]

I'm good.

[Chris]

She just talks when other people are telling stories.

[Morgan]

You're the one who said, well, hand it to us right before the story.

[Lizzie]

It's just funny because I was like, the story's going on so you're getting the pizza, but you're so audible about getting the pizza.

[Morgan]

Everybody just give me a thumbs up that I did okay.

[Lizzie]

You did good.

[Chris]

The most wholesome person that we know.

[Shane]

It's true.

[Marcus]

Hard facts.

[Chris]

Mom's here for the. The company, not the.

[Marcus]

Honestly, I'd vote for Vicki for president.

[Morgan]

Oh, thanks, Lizzy.

[Lizzie]

Let me take another bite of the viral pizza. I'm. I'm gonna be sick. I should not. But I'm going. I'm going to.

[Marcus]

You're going crazy.

[Lizzie]

I'm going to.

[Chris]

I'm okay.

[Lizzie]

You can't stop me. Lizzy, do you want any more cheesy Tots?

[Marcus]

Because he can't.

[Lizzie]

Is there room on the floor?

[Chris]

Yeah, I just got to this stuffed crust. Oh, it's good.

[Shane]

That's my favorite part of the beef.

[Chris]

Did you guys used to take the mozzarella cheese sticks and put them in the microwave?

[Marcus]

You mean like a string cheese?

[Chris]

A string cheese in the microwave for 20 seconds and then it's like a mozzarella cheese stick?

[Lizzie]

No, dang.

[Marcus]

No.

[Chris]

That's to get stuff.

[Marcus]

You crazy.

[Morgan]

Yeah, she is.

[Shane]

This is a delicious slice of pizza, but I do like the TikTok one much better.

[Lizzie]

I don't. It's not for me.

[Marcus]

No, you don't like garlic? I think you like it but you avoid it because you got told you were stinky.

[Lizzie]

Oh, it's good.

[Marcus]

Isn't that sad? Oh, she said you like it like you like Timothy Chalvet.

[Lizzie]

I like it like you love JLo.

[Marcus]

I admit it.

[Lizzie]

Complicated for all of us.

[Marcus]

Well, I admit it. I love the woman.

[Lizzie]

There's something like bitter in it.

[Morgan]

You really don't like it?

[Lizzie]

No, there's something like sour just that hit me.

[Morgan]

I love it. It's Alfredo sauce maybe or something.

[Marcus]

No, it's. It's the garlic parmesan sauce.

[Morgan]

It is so good.

[Lizzie]

Tick tock. And the garlic pizza. I'm just kidding.

[Marcus]

No, he literally loves it.

[Lizzie]

Wow, this is danger.

[Marcus]

It smells like a problem.

[Shane]

What is it?

[Lizzie]

The cookie brownie. We're gonna be sick, you guys.

[Marcus]

I'm already blacking out. I can't us.

[Chris]

I get to the point where I'm not sick from food anymore, then they. You guys just keep feeding, feeding, feeding, feeding, feeding.

[Lizzie]

I'm telling you, Shane's a feeder.

[Morgan]

Oh yeah, yeah.

[Lizzie]

Yes, he's a feeder.

[Chris]

We were almost at a cake for the first time time in days. We've had cake every day and he's like, order another cake.

[Lizzie]

What do you.

[Marcus]

What, what kind of cake?

[Lizzie]

He just likes to keep people well fed.

[Marcus]

What was the occasion?

[Lizzie]

Fun life.

[Marcus]

Did it say to celebrate fun?

[Lizzie]

It said period poo. It did.

[Marcus]

That's cute.

[Lizzie]

He just.

[Marcus]

Period poo. Yeah, that's a little bit. That's hitting a little too close to home for me right now.

[Lizzie]

Oh, cuz you're. Yeah, you're. Oh, did I not give you a brownie before I passed it back?

[Marcus]

No, you did not. Oh, crazy.

[Lizzie]

Do you want a centerpiece do you want the coveted centerpiece?

[Marcus]

No.

[Lizzie]

Who wants the centerpiece?

[Marcus]

I like a corner piece.

[Lizzie]

Okay, I'll get you a corner piece.

[Marcus]

Thank you.

[Chris]

I remember the one and only TikTok that we really made in Covid era was us trying to make brownies in those mugs. And we both were so sick.

[Lizzie]

Oh, yeah.

[Chris]

And then we both gave up on TikTok.

[Lizzie]

Oh, you have one. Okay, everyone dive into the brownie one.

[Morgan]

Okay.

[Lizzie]

Oh, my God. I was.

[Chris]

I wish I wouldn't have eaten so much pizza because I would have eaten this whole thing.

[Lizzie]

The edges are crispy and the inside is chewy, but it's not crunchy. Don't be mistaken. It's so. It's a perfect. How can you go wrong?

[Marcus]

I don't know.

[Morgan]

It's too fast after the pepperoni stuff. Wow.

[Chris]

That man in there deserves a raise. And a big one.

[Lizzie]

I gave him a good tip.

[Marcus]

Go show him your butthole, Morgan.

[Lizzie]

Go show them how clean.

[Marcus]

Chris, go show them how clean and smooth and white your butthole is.

[Morgan]

We get back to clean and then there it goes.

[Marcus]

This is what you've prepared for. You've been training.

[Morgan]

Now, should we go to that McDonald's and get Shane a crispy diet Coke?

[Lizzie]

Oh, he would love us if we did that.

[Marcus]

Okay.

[Lizzie]

Wow. This is incredible.

[Marcus]

Incredible.

[Lizzie]

Honestly. Wow. I've been sleeping on Domino's. For real. You guys all have? It really is. If you're gonna get pizza, you gotta do it.

[Chris]

No other option.

[Lizzie]

Where does your family get pizza from?

[Marcus]

We'll get it from a local place. Oh, get your name. You know, they just get Danielle's.

[Lizzie]

Danielle.

[Marcus]

It might be Daniel's, but it's hard to say with that name.

[Morgan]

We were hungry. Howie's in Colorado.

[Lizzie]

Oh, jets pizza in Colorado. My son half named after it.

[Marcus]

Really?

[Lizzie]

No.

[Marcus]

You're so crazy.

[Lizzie]

Well, when Shane brought it up, I was like. Like the pizza we had last night. And he was like, I'm not going to let you. Yes. So how.

[Marcus]

Chris.

[Chris]

I can't let him eat a second.

[Morgan]

You're not even a second after that.

[Lizzie]

Did you not see?

[Morgan]

I'm just like. You never eat, though, you know, so.

[Lizzie]

Okay, Jeez. Did you not see the photo of us Jet in the Jet pizzas box?

[Morgan]

I hope he's not going to dump something on us.

[Marcus]

Where was it?

[Lizzie]

In my phone.

[Marcus]

When would I have seen? When I came across your mom's wallpaper.

[Lizzie]

And we took a photo with Max and the Grinch book with the Max. Max has his own book. It's so Good.

[Chris]

That's the perfect warmth right now.

[Marcus]

Box.

[Chris]

It's not going to be the same.

[Marcus]

20 minutes.

[Shane]

Yes.

[Marcus]

I think we're all dying.

[Lizzie]

We're going to have four. I know you, too.

[Marcus]

I'm going to.

[Chris]

You want four kids too now?

[Marcus]

No, me. No, girl. I want three.

[Lizzie]

So different. It is. It is, it is. Okay, well, that's gotta be it because we're gonna be sick.

[Marcus]

I am sick. It's over for me.

[Lizzie]

That I've gotta. Oh, it's almost over.

[Shane]

How good this is.

[Morgan]

And Shane will try to feed.

[Lizzie]

I can't have too much. Oh, what? I. Shane had asked.

[Vicki]

I remember.

[Lizzie]

He was like, save me some. I was like, of what? Maybe I didn't, but I did.

[Morgan]

Did you?

[Lizzie]

Of the viral pizza?

[Marcus]

It's okay. We got this for him.

[Lizzie]

Okay. I'm gonna drive my ass through McDonald's to get my husband a crispy Diet Coke.

[Morgan]

Hell, yeah, I'm getting the crispy Diet Coke.

[Lizzie]

Okay. My mom, it was her idea. It was on a camera he saw. And thank you guys so much for watching and hanging out with us. Make sure you subscribe to my sister's YouTube channel. She has a video coming up that we were all. Well, not you, but Shane and I and my mom were all just in.

[Chris]

We tried Kai clothes.

[Morgan]

That was a bad YouTube and it's.

[Lizzie]

Been a long time since I've gone in the wild and like, women's clothing. Yeah.

[Marcus]

I was pretty shocked to see the images that have graced myself.

[Lizzie]

It was pretty bold.

[Marcus]

It was bold.

[Chris]

We brought him back to life.

[Lizzie]

You can shop my mom's Amazon storefront. Go to the link in her Instagram. Otherwise they think it's fraud. If I promote it here on YouTube.

[Marcus]

I think it's pretty fraudulent.

[Lizzie]

So go to my mom's Instagram, hit follow, and then click the link in her description. And you can shop everything on her Amazon storefront. That shirt might debatably be from there.

[Marcus]

It's so cute, that shirt.

[Lizzie]

It really is. We stopped in Jack in the Box because we had to pee. And I was like, oh, good, Mom.

[Marcus]

Dude, I noticed that shirt when we got out of the car earlier. And I was like, I want that shirt.

[Chris]

And isn't this mom's best hair to you yet?

[Lizzie]

Yeah, it really is. I got up.

[Marcus]

Blown out.

[Chris]

Yeah.

[Lizzie]

And Christopher has been posting sketches all over Instagram. So make sure you follow Chris on Instagram. And thank you so much for watching and enjoying our show. We'll see you next Wednesday. Oh, fucking. Subscribe to the Patreon. What are you guys doing? What are you doing? You get to see the extended 20 minutes of today and every episode of the Sip. Lizzy had her first solo vlog, go live. And it's a great time over there. So we love you very much. We'll see you next week. Goodbye. And that's the Sip.

[Chris]

And I told everyone about my poop problems.

[Lizzie]

Oh, Morgan really delivered on the.

[Marcus]

Morgan treated this like a Catholic confessional. And if you wanted to know anything about her, it is on the Tron.

[Chris]

I'm supporting you guys.

[Marcus]

Thank you so much, sister girl. She's like, I've been holding onto this story for weeks, and I didn't have anywhere to tell it, so I told it on the Tron.

[Lizzie]

Toodaloo.

[Chris]

What the hell are you guys doing out here? What the hell? Always thought that Patreon was for nudes until I realized that you weren't doing nudes. I had to ask Mom.

[Lizzie]

I had to clarify.

[Chris]

I was like, patreon, huh? Things must not be going good. You have big tits and gorgeous hair.

[Marcus]

I don't know what you're talking.

[Morgan]

I. I warned you. Do not.

[Chris]

She claims that Bread is a butt plug.

[Lizzie]

She's not wrong.

[Morgan]

But she warned me, if any nude photos come up, I am dead.

[Marcus]

You shave your butthole.

[Shane]

See, I'm not alone in this.

[Marcus]

How many boys are looking at your butthole? Sat.