Tasting The CRUMBL KARDASHIAN Collab with Shane, Morgan, My Mom, and Spencer!!!

Summary

Summary of "Tasting The CRUMBL KARDASHIAN Collab with Shane, Morgan, My Mom, and Spencer!!!"

Podcast Details:

• Title: The Sip with Ryland Adams and Lizze Gordon
• Host/Author: Ryland Adams
• Episode Title: Tasting The CRUMBL KARDASHIAN Collab with Shane, Morgan, My Mom, and Spencer!!!
• Release Date: April 9, 2025

Overview: In this vibrant episode of The Sip with Ryland Adams and Lizze Gordon, the opinionated hosts, along with guests Shane, Morgan, and Spencer, explore a variety of topics ranging from daily parenting challenges and personal dramas to indulging in the latest celebrity-endorsed treats. The highlight of the episode is the in-depth tasting and review of the new CRUMBL KARDASHIAN cookie collaboration, offering listeners a blend of humor, heartfelt stories, and pop culture insights.

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Technical Hiccups and Introduction (00:00 - 02:32)

The episode kicks off with some light-hearted chaos as Chris attempts to manage the podcast setup, leading to humorous exchanges between Lizze and Chris. Early moments are marked by playful banter about podcast changes and ensuring everyone is on the same page.

• Elizabeth: "I'm involved in drama." [00:00]
• Chris: "What better way to stop her than with Chris Brechtinger?" [00:20]
• Ryland: "We are the luckiest girls in the world." [02:20]

This segment sets a fun and relaxed tone, showcasing the dynamic chemistry between the hosts.

Parenting and Daily Life Struggles (02:32 - 21:57)

The conversation quickly delves into the intricacies of parenting, highlighting the challenges of maintaining baby schedules and managing everyday tasks.

• Elizabeth: "He was walking with precision." [01:21]
• Chris: "What does that even mean? A Kardashian cookie?" [02:54]
• Elizabeth: “They need to be around other things... it’s a good way to do that in a safe, literally padded space.” [18:42]

Lizze shares anecdotes about her son Max's unpredictable behavior, underscoring the joys and frustrations of parenting. The discussion touches on topics like gymnastics classes for babies, balancing schedules, and the importance of routine versus flexibility.

Drama and Past Relationships (21:57 - 52:46)

Lizze transitions into more personal territory, recounting a tumultuous past relationship from her teenage years. This segment is filled with raw emotions and candid storytelling.

• Elizabeth: "I'm involved in drama." [00:00]
• Lizze: "This was the most hideous, abusive relationship of my entire life." [49:47]
• Chris: "How come?" [43:14]

She reveals the complexities of her high school romance, the challenges of being blocked on social media, and her relentless pursuit of closure after 20 years of unresolved feelings. The hosts navigate this sensitive topic with empathy, balancing serious reflections with their characteristic humor.

Tasting the CRUMBL KARDASHIAN Collaboration (52:46 - 71:46)

The episode's centerpiece is the tasting and review of the newly released CRUMBL KARDASHIAN cookie collaboration. The hosts and guests sample various cookie flavors, each associated with different Kardashian family members, and provide their honest feedback.

• Ryland: "That's gotta be Kim." [60:51]
• Elizabeth: "I love it, but it doesn't have that signature." [65:10]
• Chris: "I like the almond, but this is very good." [65:22]

Highlights:

• Kim Kardashian’s Cookie: Praised for its classic flavor but criticized for being too sweet by some.
• Kendall Jenner’s Cookie: Received high marks for its delicate texture and well-balanced taste.
• Kylie Jenner’s Cookie: Loved by Ryland for its phenomenal taste, while others found it overly processed.
• Kourtney Kardashian’s Cookie: Mixed reviews with some finding it too dry and lacking the expected almond flavor.

The tasting session is filled with lively debates, playful disagreements, and bursts of laughter, making it an entertaining segment for listeners.

Personal Anecdotes and Final Thoughts (71:46 - End)

As the tasting wraps up, the hosts share additional personal stories and reflections, reinforcing the episode's blend of humor and heartfelt conversation. They discuss the importance of balancing personal ambitions with family life and the relentless pursuit of maintaining relationships amidst chaos.

• Elizabeth: "I love it, but it doesn't have that signature." [65:10]
• Chris: "I’m going to stand there literally with bald patches and blood dripping out of every orifice of my body." [31:31]
• RYland: "We are the luckiest girls in the world." [02:20]

Notable Quotes:

• Elizabeth: "I have so much breakage in the front that it's almost hard for me to talk to Rylan about his hair." [09:49]
• Chris: "He’s been drunk." [01:21]
• Ryland: "We're doing the deal." [57:09]

Conclusion:

This episode of The Sip masterfully balances personal storytelling with entertaining reviews, providing listeners with a multifaceted listening experience. From navigating the highs and lows of parenthood to savoring celebrity-endorsed treats, Ryland, Lizze, and their guests offer a candid and engaging narrative that resonates with a diverse audience. The dynamic interactions and honest feedback make this episode a standout, leaving listeners both entertained and connected to the hosts' authentic experiences.

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Notable Quotes with Timestamps:

• Elizabeth: "I'm involved in drama." [00:00]
• Chris: "Oh, my God. She's in her Barbie pumps." [01:05]
• Lizze: "They need to be around other things... it’s a good way to do that in a safe, literally padded space." [18:42]
• Ryland: "We are the luckiest girls in the world." [02:20]
• Elizabeth: "I have so much breakage in the front that it's almost hard for me to talk to Rylan about his hair." [09:49]
• Chris: "I'm going to stand there literally with bald patches and blood dripping out of every orifice of my body." [31:31]
• Ryland: "We're doing the deal." [57:09]
• Elizabeth: "I have to bring my baby, though." [05:02]
• Ryan: "That's gotta be Kim." [60:51]

This structured and detailed summary captures the essence of the episode, highlighting the key discussions, personal stories, and the interactive tasting session, all while maintaining the natural flow and engaging tone of the original podcast.

Transcript

[Elizabeth]

I'm involved in drama.

[Chris]

One, take one. Marker. Chris, I've been anxious about this. I've had to make some changes to this podcast. I've been reading your comments. Somebody sent me a thread, and I've been listening to you guys. I had to cut the fat and Elizabeth Gordon is no longer with us. What? Chris, get your ass in the seat. No. Stop it. Chris, come get in the seat. What? Lizzie's been acting crazy. Somebody needs to stop her, and I figured. I feel like you're not allowed to sit here. What better way to stop her than with Chris Brechtinger? This feels illegal. This feels wrong. Something. Chris, tell them something. Which. Tell them what she did to you.

[Ryland]

Tell them what she did to you.

[Chris]

He told me to sit here. I'm so sorry. Oh, my God. She's in her Barbie pumps. I was just faking your exit, like. Like you were fired. Not like you exited. And then you come in here looking like a full blown snack. You're like, max. Oh, my God.

[Elizabeth]

I'm like, max.

[Chris]

All of a sudden, that boy, like, he was walking so well, and the last two days it's like he's been drunk. His, like, tipsy doozy. Now what? I don't know if it's like a weird development thing or if he's just teething hardcore and it's throwing him off balance, but he was, like, walking with precision.

[Elizabeth]

Sounds like what he needs is gymnastics.

[Chris]

Oh, this is what you want to start with already? No, I was just kidding, you guys. April Fools.

[Elizabeth]

Girl, you can't April Fools on April fucking 10.

[Chris]

Well, I was just ready to party. And of course, there was traffic today.

[Elizabeth]

Okay, can you post the group chat at this point, Chris? Because the group chat says we're gonna record at 11:15. What the fuck time is it right now?

[Chris]

Oh, I thought you meant, like the patriot chat. 11:11. Make a wish. Thank you so much for guiding us to this moment.

[Elizabeth]

I wish we hadn't told RYLAND it was 11:11, because you know, that bitch wouldn't have told us.

[Chris]

We are blessed.

[Elizabeth]

We are the luckiest girls in the world. Say it with us. We are the l. Luckiest girls in the world.

[Chris]

Chris has taken on the mantra as well.

[Elizabeth]

Good. Oh, my God. Finally.

[Chris]

Beautiful spring day here in Los Angeles. And I just wanted to get moving because my family's been here for an entire week. And guess what?

[Elizabeth]

All you're doing is working.

[Chris]

All we've done is work. We've had a blast. But it's like day after day after day. I've put these women to work, and it's like, I just wanted to wrap something up so that we could enjoy a nice little evening together. You know what I'm saying?

[Elizabeth]

Yeah, I want to enjoy a nice little evening together, but I wasn't invited.

[Chris]

We didn't even get to have Billy Bob come over and hang out with us.

[Elizabeth]

He's never going to know his Grammy Vic.

[Chris]

I mean, he knows his Grammy Vic.

[Elizabeth]

Billy.

[Chris]

Yeah. He's never met my mom. Yes, he has.

[Elizabeth]

Multiple times.

[Chris]

He has.

[Elizabeth]

But it's like, now he's online, and he's so fun. I want her to see him, know him.

[Chris]

Not to start off nasty. Oh, but there's no way you went from, I'm not showing my baby on the Internet to I'm getting my baby a talent agent.

[Elizabeth]

Oh, no, he loves to act.

[Chris]

Oh, he's a manipulative brat, too.

[Elizabeth]

No.

[Chris]

Every time I say that, people are like, babies aren't manipulating you. Oh, no.

[Elizabeth]

Babies manipulate. Remember? We Googled it.

[Chris]

I know, but they're gonna tell. Like, those child. I mean. And I'm not mocking you. I know you're correct. But I like to, in my head, frame it. And it's not like I'm thinking, whatever. They're manipulating us.

[Elizabeth]

No, they are, because they don't. They don't. It's not. I guess it's like, it's an actus rea Manipulation, not a men's raya. Do you know what I'm saying? Legal community.

[Chris]

No, I don't.

[Elizabeth]

Well, because you're not in the legal community.

[Chris]

You look beautiful.

[Elizabeth]

Thank you.

[Chris]

Spring has sprung.

[Elizabeth]

Spring, she's sprung.

[Chris]

Did you just get this? Yeah.

[Elizabeth]

You've seen it. You. You weighed in on it when I bought it. I was like, should I get this? You're like, yes, Perrin.

[Chris]

I agree.

[Elizabeth]

You were literally there.

[Chris]

Still stands true. Today, when she sent it to me, I was like, damn, I wish I had a Lenin spring floral button up to match you in.

[Elizabeth]

I don't think it's linen. I know, but material that just holds in stink.

[Chris]

That's my thing.

[Elizabeth]

That's why I smell like Britney Spears. Curious.

[Chris]

I want to look like I'm working at a fancy resort in Cabo or Hawaii. You know, one of them, we are.

[Elizabeth]

Due for a rizzy. So if you want to go out and get matching summer outfits, I would fucking love to.

[Chris]

Oh, I thought you meant go out to get a vacation.

[Elizabeth]

No, like, we just get matching outfits for our Rizzy.

[Chris]

I know, but I'd like to go on a vacation.

[Elizabeth]

Let's go.

[Chris]

Okay.

[Elizabeth]

I have to bring my baby, though.

[Chris]

Of course you do.

[Elizabeth]

But we'll go anywhere. I'll go anywhere.

[Chris]

Of course you do.

[Elizabeth]

Bring your baby. Of course.

[Chris]

No, seriously, have you submitted your babies to talent agents?

[Elizabeth]

I'm going to. Yeah.

[Chris]

No, you're not.

[Elizabeth]

Yeah, I am.

[Chris]

What is wrong with you?

[Elizabeth]

I don't know.

[Chris]

This is where I draw the line.

[Elizabeth]

I have a feeling that he's the next Leo DiCaprio. I hear it. Nope. I hear it. I know how I sound. I know it's crazy. I'm ready to take the heat because I honestly, I'm in the kitchen. You know what I'm saying?

[Chris]

Oh, you're gonna ruin his life and your relationship with him in the process.

[Elizabeth]

No. Leonardo DiCaprio loves his mother to be.

[Chris]

Actors for a reason.

[Elizabeth]

Loves his mother and he was a child actor.

[Chris]

You're gonna do it, right?

[Elizabeth]

Yes.

[Chris]

If anyone should be acting, it's Max. And I'm not getting him a talent agent.

[Elizabeth]

Maybe you should. You know, you should get him to the gym.

[Chris]

Oh, you really just want. I've come. I've found some pit holes in your story.

[Elizabeth]

What story? Who is it? Is it important?

[Chris]

Don't worry.

[Elizabeth]

Someone else you're doing baby gym with. You.

[Chris]

Okay.

[Elizabeth]

What are the holes in your story?

[Chris]

Well, no, Elizabeth is, you know, bold, beautiful, practical. She's the mom that does it all. Also, have you noticed anything about me?

[Elizabeth]

Your hair is behind your ears.

[Chris]

And I did it sheerly out of being. It's not that correct. I did it solely because I was bullied by Elizabeth. We're sitting in the car the other day, I'm having a good time. I'm eating my McDonald's, we're doing a quick sip in the middle of a shoot for Shane, and she goes, your hair looks awful. No, no, it's on camera. It's literally on camera.

[Elizabeth]

But here's the deal. You literally intentionally.

[Chris]

I don't know how to explain it. No, I'm trying new things.

[Elizabeth]

You've all seen it. You know, he's insufferable. He's a beautiful fucking man. He's a beautiful man and his hair is going in a direction and maybe eventually we'll hit the destination. But if life's about the journey, this is not the one you should be taking.

[Chris]

So you want me to full blown be a douchey slick back boy and.

[Elizabeth]

You want to be a full bl. You want to be a full blown douchey slick back boy or you want to be a Bob?

[Chris]

You can't have it both ways. If your bangs are, like, flowy, you can't push the back back because then.

[Elizabeth]

It looks like bangs.

[Chris]

What are you talking about?

[Elizabeth]

You don't have bangs. What bangs are. Is this, like, a thing?

[Chris]

Listen, I'll put a picture up. Like, I either have to do my hair where it's, like, framing down and then flowing over my ears, and it's like a.

[Elizabeth]

It's a bomb.

[Chris]

It doesn't have nice layers yet because we're growing. And then I want to cut into, like, you know, make, you know, he.

[Elizabeth]

Wants a Karen cut, a princess die.

[Chris]

And as we're on our way there, I'm doing my best. I'm trying different things. And Lizzie's like, you have to push that behind your ear. That looks horrible.

[Ryland]

No.

[Chris]

And so now today, I look back at this footage, and my slick back looks too. Scott Disicky, and I don't have a good enough hairline to rock that kind of cut. I blame you.

[Elizabeth]

But wouldn't you rather be a Disick than a Walter Goggins? And I love Goggins. Honestly, I think Goggins is so hot, and I get that. A receding Goggins.

[Chris]

Yeah. The guy on White Lotus.

[Elizabeth]

Yeah.

[Chris]

Yeah. They're saying he's my doppelganger in 20 years.

[Elizabeth]

It's a good. Have you seen him shirtless?

[Chris]

No.

[Elizabeth]

Oh, my God.

[Chris]

This season of White Lotus fucking not my intent.

[Elizabeth]

Me neither.

[Chris]

To save my life.

[Elizabeth]

My son loves it. I can't watch it. He's like, huh?

[Chris]

He loves Walter Goggin.

[Elizabeth]

He loves.

[Chris]

And that's how you knew he was an actor?

[Elizabeth]

Yes.

[Chris]

Gay. Most men actors are gay, Right? Let's just put it out there.

[Elizabeth]

What? How did we get back to your hair? Oh, how did that happen to us again?

[Chris]

Oh, I was just asking if you noticed anything, because I didn't want to take the heat from you. Just like, I had to get a different version of my beautiful shoes to not get bullied by you, because if I wear the other color of the same shoe around you, they're hideous. They're too bulky, they're skater, and they're awful. But I changed the color, and it's fin. My hair length is awful, but if it's pushed behind my ears, it's fine. And you know what? I take it to heart. It's like being mom shamed to me. Do you have a friend that just, like, stabs you in the heart when you think you're doing something good for yourself and it just rips your confidence to sheds. And then.

[Elizabeth]

So fucking crazy.

[Chris]

Imagine my confusion when my husband's like, no, don't cut it. Don't cut it. I like it like this. Don't cut it. And then your best friend's like, it looks awful. And the Internet's also gassing me up, so it's like, what can I even believe? Sometimes I'll see footage of myself. What are you doing? Sometimes I'll see footage of myself, like, in a video, though, when I. I felt bullied into. I. I felt. Oh, so you hate them again?

[Elizabeth]

No, that's not my problem.

[Chris]

I felt bullied into. Do. I tried this for the first time yesterday. I saw some vlog footage of Morgan's because I took her house hunting.

[Elizabeth]

Oh, my God, is she coming back?

[Chris]

I took her house hunting. Oh, I'm. You know me. I'm.

[Elizabeth]

You're just trying to get us all over.

[Chris]

I'm a housing addict. Yeah, I am trying to get everyone to Calabasas. It's a great time here and.

[Shane]

Oh, my God.

[Chris]

Can I tell you something?

[Elizabeth]

What?

[Chris]

Okay, so, YouTube, what is happening?

[Elizabeth]

Why am I being tickled on the face?

[Chris]

Oh, it's your hair. It's just your beautiful, curly spring hair.

[Elizabeth]

You guys, I have so much breakage in the front that it's almost hard for me to talk to Rylan about his hair. And I need you to know, Ryguy, you look great. Let me just finish a thought, okay?

[Chris]

I brought you some electrolytes.

[Elizabeth]

Thank you. I have to pee. So here's the deal, baby. I love you, and I think you're so hot. And I think about it almost every time I see you on camera or in a picture. I just look and I'm like, damn, he's good looking. That is a good looking man. And then sometimes you do crazy, like, say your hair needs to be out over your ears, and that is just not it. Can you please, Chris, pull up a picture of Steve Butabi?

[Chris]

Who's that from?

[Elizabeth]

Night at the Roxbury?

[Chris]

Okay, while he does that, I've forgotten.

[Elizabeth]

Everything else that was going on in my life.

[Chris]

Oh, you said you were in a good mood today. What happened? What was the pep in your step?

[Elizabeth]

I just. I just.

[Chris]

Did Joe wake up at 8am No.

[Elizabeth]

I woke him up early. Oh, I'm done with his.

[Chris]

And he was in a good mood when you woke him up?

[Elizabeth]

Yeah.

[Chris]

Great.

[Elizabeth]

We. And then we started getting catty with each other, and I was like, let's give each other compliments instead. And he goes, you're the best at Being catty. Yeah, that's you, baby.

[Chris]

Let me see this on the left.

[Elizabeth]

Yeah.

[Chris]

Yeah, that's about it.

[Elizabeth]

Yeah.

[Chris]

It's not okay.

[Elizabeth]

That's what I'm trying to say to you, baby.

[Chris]

See, I am thinking if I go, I need layer so it stacks nicely. Here's the thing about a theme park, and I'm a theme park girl. Lots of haircut inspiration. All these 16 year olds with killer hairlines and full thick hair are real good hair inspiration. And I wish I would have taken a picture of the guy that I liked the most. It was like, length, like mine.

[Elizabeth]

You should not be taking pictures of strange teenagers in public.

[Chris]

I know. I was just like, I liked your haircut, and I want to show it to my hair girl. All right. I didn't. So we're in the clear.

[Elizabeth]

You just get on a roller coaster at the same time as him. So you guys have the same picture. It's for my hair girl.

[Chris]

That's a great idea.

[Elizabeth]

Oh, my God. Continue.

[Chris]

Now I forgot what I was saying.

[Elizabeth]

What were your. What was his hair?

[Chris]

Oh, it was just incredible. It was lengthy on top. It was very 90s, but it was structured. My problem is right now is it's growing out. The top is meeting the bottom, so it all just falls in blobs.

[Elizabeth]

It's called a bob.

[Chris]

It just blobs. It bobs the bob blobs.

[Elizabeth]

The bob's bobbing.

[Chris]

So I do need to get some layers or figure out where it's going. And in that rough spot of growth, it does get difficult.

[Elizabeth]

It does. But it looks good behind your ears. And it looks whack attack when it's not.

[Chris]

Okay, so here's what's going on.

[Elizabeth]

What?

[Chris]

You know I'm trying to get you to Calabasas.

[Elizabeth]

Yeah.

[Chris]

You know that when I'm at Superba with my family, I want to be like, oh, you're two minutes away. Just jump over and let's have a great afternoon. But you're 40 minutes away, and that could never happen to me. So I'm going to bed. The other night, I'm scrolling on YouTube and this girl. I've never seen pup saying moving to California.

[Elizabeth]

Oh, I don't want to talk about this.

[Chris]

You know me. No, there's a plot twist.

[Elizabeth]

Oh, we hate her together.

[Chris]

Whoa. I don't know her. I literally.

[Elizabeth]

I don't know her either, but obviously I hate her.

[Chris]

Vlog says, moving to California. And I was like, okay, let me just see. Then I look at the video, and she's in my neighborhood. She's going to all the places I go. And I'm like, wow, Whoa. This new mommy is in my neighborhood.

[Elizabeth]

She's also an influencer. YouTuber.

[Chris]

I think she was a tiktoker, because I then asked Morgan. I was like, do you know who this person is? And she was like, oh, yeah, she's a tiktoker that then got signed to, like, Unwell Unwell Network. And so, yeah, I watched her vlog. She has four kids. She's probably younger than me, and she's in all of my. All of my local places. All right, so then this weekend, I take my family on a House Hunters episode. Three different houses at three different price points just to look for fun.

[Elizabeth]

Okay.

[Chris]

You know? And so, like, the first two were reasonable. I'm like, how can I convince my mom to get out here? And then the second or the third one popped up. It's like an expensive house in a beautiful part of Calabasas. And I was like, just for fun. It's Iporn. And Morgan's like, what? This girl that I bumped into, who I threatened to become friends.

[Elizabeth]

You bumped into on the Internet, who.

[Chris]

I was stalking on the Internet, is now house hunting in this area. I don't know if she was hunting. Whatever. Whatever. I think she's showing them online. So she's doing, like, a series on TikTok where she's touring. She's, like, showing the houses she's touring with her family.

[Elizabeth]

Are we in? Four kids and her husband.

[Chris]

Oh, I don't know. I think we can, but let's. Let's just keep the story moving for a second. So then I. I had seen this girl. When Lizzie couldn't come to me, I was like, well, this new mom with four kids just moved to Calabasas, so I'm gonna befriend her.

[Elizabeth]

And you guys give me for talking about his hair. But he literally will text me and say, I'm done with you. I'm gonna make friends with this other woman who's living here who has four kids.

[Chris]

I need, like, a mom friend that can just, like. We can like, pop in, like, five minutes away and do something fun.

[Elizabeth]

And I'm a. Because I tell you your hair looks stupid when your hair looks stupid. I just want you to hear it. I just want you to hear it.

[Chris]

Cut two. I'm like, Morgan, let's hit this house. Wait.

[Elizabeth]

Timestamp 14:30. I said the C word.

[Chris]

Oh. Trying to demonetize us and ruin our business.

[Elizabeth]

I can't help it, okay?

[Chris]

And so Morgan's like, watch. She's gonna be at this house. We walk into this house, guess who walks in right after us?

[Elizabeth]

She.

[Chris]

This woman, her husband and her four children.

[Elizabeth]

Wow.

[Chris]

I was in a rush because we had to film the Shane Dawson podcast. So I did not say hi. And Morgan was like, you should have at least said hi. And I was like, well, good luck.

[Elizabeth]

Making friends with her. I'm so glad that she can live in this neighborhood and be friends with you.

[Chris]

She follows Shane and none of us, so.

[Elizabeth]

Well, maybe friends Shane will be friends with her.

[Chris]

Maybe Shane will be mom friends with her. I mean, it's just a matter of time until you're out here, right? And then I don't have to make friends with somebody else.

[Elizabeth]

Who knows? Looks like someone else might be here eventually and I don't have to worry about it anymore. And I'll just go to fucking the gym class by myself.

[Chris]

Okay, back to your gym class.

[Elizabeth]

Go to the fucking gym class with me. So this. You guys have heard it. You guys have heard it. Someone complains every time I bring up my parents in me class.

[Chris]

You know, I just want to be invited.

[Morgan]

I don't want to go.

[Chris]

So that is my nightmare.

[Elizabeth]

So I go out of my way to find a gymnastics class because this motherfucker has always said, I will do a gymnastics class with you. I would love to do a gymnastics class with you. Let's do a gymnastics class. Find something that's on our side of town. He has all these fucking stipulations. He has this schedule that he won't deviate from for a day.

[Chris]

It's every 16 months old schedule. They sleep from 12 to 2. That's.

[Elizabeth]

I know, but like you can. You can be flexible in your schedule a day.

[Chris]

Not in the way that they're. No, I can't.

[Elizabeth]

I believe. Trust me when I say you can't. And if it doesn't work, try it one time.

[Chris]

The class is at 11:15. If they then push to 1pm they will have been up for six hours when they're already adjusting to this new schedule that will ruin our lives. And I have two babies. It's not like. Whatever.

[Elizabeth]

I'm just saying you can.

[Chris]

One baby. Baby privilege is showing.

[Elizabeth]

No, you can. Like, you can try it. Like, you can just try it. And if it.

[Chris]

But I'm not going to. I don't want to if it. I don't know why they're doing a gymnastics class for children that typically sleep from 12 to 2 at 11:15.

[Elizabeth]

It's just like There it's a range, right? So like it's really hard to find like baby classes that you can do with friends. That's. Babies are like, oh, not in the same fucking two month period of birth.

[Chris]

Right.

[Elizabeth]

Because every, like at this point in time, like developmentally babies are so drastically different when it like even three months apart, they're so different. You can't put them in the same room. Cause they're crazy. So I found a class where we can have his 15 month old, 16 months today, 16 month olds and my 7 month old in a few days do gymnastics together. Because it's a friend and sibling class.

[Chris]

Yeah.

[Elizabeth]

And my friend over here seems to believe that his life will be over. Listen, if he exercises flexibility at all.

[Chris]

I'm a schedule girl. The schedule has worked for us. Our babies have been sleeping through the night, 12 hours a night since 7 months old. And I have found peace with that. I like it. It's reliable, it's consistent. And babies like a routine. At least mine do. And so that's just the way it goes. And so if this gym had a. On any other day at a normal time, between 8 and 12 and 2 and 7, I'm there.

[Elizabeth]

Do you want.

[Chris]

They don't.

[Elizabeth]

Well, on Monday.

[Chris]

On Monday is when we work a six hour day.

[Elizabeth]

Yeah, but we're not doing gymnastics. These motherfuckers are doing it.

[Chris]

I know, but. Okay. I'm just saying it would happen right after the podcast. Lizzie would somehow have to get her baby here unless her baby comes to my house. And I'm just. I don't. It would be a lot to. It would. It might stress out my household.

[Elizabeth]

I honestly think we should audition it and not sign up for the full thing, but audition it and see if it's worth trying for.

[Chris]

Okay.

[Elizabeth]

Because I'm honestly so. I can already see the mems. I already have the memories forming in my head and they're so fun.

[Chris]

Well, and it's good for them.

[Elizabeth]

They need to be around other things. They need to watch how like the world is and like it's a good way to do that in a safe, literally padded space. It's cool. I say we try it.

[Chris]

I'm down to try. If it was at 4:15 on any other of the six of the seven days a week, I would be there in a heartbeat. Yeah, I really would.

[Elizabeth]

I say we try it and if it's too much, we don't do it with zero commitment.

[Chris]

We just try to take James's car and meet us with.

[Elizabeth]

Well, not forever. No.

[Chris]

But that's the problem is you're gonna have to find a long term nanny solution.

[Elizabeth]

Well, that's the difference.

[Chris]

When your husband goes to work, that's a different conversation.

[Elizabeth]

Okay, I'm gonna re email the daycare that I checked. So that's boring.

[Chris]

Okay.

[Elizabeth]

But I'm gonna be that person. Like, hey, I just wanted to make sure I was clear what I said. I need to get into your facility.

[Chris]

And I need it now.

[Elizabeth]

It's my child care and I need it now.

[Chris]

Do you want to be so pregnant? You want to what?

[Elizabeth]

I just want to be pregnant so bad. I can smell it.

[Chris]

Why?

[Elizabeth]

I don't know. That's crazy.

[Chris]

You're sick. You're sick. So you don't agree with Chaparral Rome?

[Elizabeth]

No. Chapel Railroad is a real Chapel Royal bummer. You know what I'm saying? She, she just, she's like me though. So I have to love her because she just talks about that she knows nothing about, as if she's like the beginning and end of everyone.

[Chris]

That's the thing is I've only seen the headline. I haven't seen it in context. Does she just like rambling on?

[Elizabeth]

I saw it in context. There's nothing good about it. It's just like, so bring me in. So, I mean, I've seen a 15 second clip instead of a 3 second clip, but she's like, all my friends who have babies are just in hell. And it's like, okay, this is just not true. It's just not true.

[Chris]

Right? Like, can we leave at any moment of the day at any time to do anything?

[Elizabeth]

No. Well, my friend Kate put it really great because I was scared before I had children. And then Kate was like, it's not like you want to live in the going to the club phase for the rest of your life. Like, you want to evolve and have different chapters of life. So, sure, we not. We might not be in the clubbing phase of our lives, but we're in the. The giggles and the tickles and the creepies and the crawlies and like.

[Chris]

And all of the hard things do get outweighed or balanced out by the joy and the purpose that my kid. And I'm not saying you can't have purpose without.

[Elizabeth]

No, no, no, no, no.

[Chris]

But the fulfillment that it does bring me definitely outweighs some of the quote unquote cons.

[Elizabeth]

So it's a very interesting thing for me specifically because, like, I had this big, big dream, right? And I was super scared. Like, oh, if I have this baby, does My dream die? Does everything I've built die? Is it all gonna be like, Rome and ruins and ancient and everything's gonna be new and different and whatever, and I'm just. Everything I've built, my whole life is gone and I'm dead. And then it's like, no. Like, everything I've built and become becomes something new, too. Like it's all building on top of itself and becoming what it's supposed to be.

[Chris]

And it's enriched by a different life experience.

[Elizabeth]

Yeah.

[Chris]

And I'm not saying that's the only life experience to become enriched.

[Elizabeth]

Only life experience. But it's like there are hardships in it, but at the same time, the joy is so immense.

[Chris]

I just brought this up now because you were like, you want to be pregnant so bad again, you can smell it.

[Elizabeth]

Oh, girl, I want twins. I want to be pregnant with twins. Right?

[Chris]

You're. Wow.

[Elizabeth]

And part of me is so sick because I'm like, the doctor did say wait 18 months, but she also said at least six, and here we are creeping up on seven. What am I, an overachiever?

[Chris]

I don't know much about this woman, but is she. How old is she? Are her friends all, like, 20? Chapel that have kids? Because it also does depend on the phase of life you're in. Like, sometimes I will look at shane at like, 7pm and would be like, wouldn't it be so nice if we could just run out of the house and go on a date right now? And we're like, yeah, but we wouldn't ever trade what we have with our kids for that. You know what I'm saying? And maybe, yeah, when you're 20 or you're 22 or maybe if you're not ready or you haven't planned to have kids, but if you're at a phase in your life where you want it, I just think it's a different version of your own life.

[Elizabeth]

Yeah. I do also know a lot of people who weren't necessarily planning for it and got it and are so grateful for it and love it more than anything.

[Chris]

There were a few times in your early days of after your son had come though, that you were like, oh, I can see how people that didn't want this could then resent the workload of this.

[Elizabeth]

Oh, yeah. I mean, if you don't want to be a parent, being a parent is hard. It's hard.

[Chris]

Yeah. And I think that's what she meant when she said, they're living in hell because they're tired, they're sleep Deprived. They're all of these things. But I also look at my relationship with my parents, and I pray that my kids like me like I like my parents. And I just feel like it's. It's worth it. The gamble and the risk is worth it for me.

[Elizabeth]

No, I mean, like, so over the weekend, we had, like, a play date with a bunch of the kids from Parent and Me, and it was right at Billy's bedtime or right at Billy's nap time. But I know that if I put him in his stroller out in public, I can get him down with the brown noise machine because he's used to just sleeping in darkness. That being said, my sweet son is very mobile, and he has reached a point in his life where he is like, do not strap me in. I am trying to shine, and if you try to strap me in, I'm gonna shine the brightest. Do you know what I'm saying? I do that. Arches, goes rigor mortis and flips. Like, it's literally like he's doing the call the Colorado, the crocodile death roll. And it doesn't stop. Like, he literally arches, stiffens and flips and flips and flips and flips. And he's screaming, and it's not for him. He's like, I will not be tied down. And I'm like, I get it, kid, but she will be, because one of us is in charge here, and they're a lot bigger than you. But the problem is, I don't want to traumatize him and make the situation worse so that he starts dreading even going towards the car seat, because he's fine in the car seat if I don't try and strap him in. So I don't want to make it bigger. So I'm just trying to be really cool while I do it. And I'm like, row, row, row your boat gently down the stream. And he's arching and rolling and screaming and crying. And it's like, real crying. You're in hell, and it's like, you might mistake this for one of the rooms in hell, but it's not necessarily hell. And eventually, to get him into the car seat, I had to pull my titties out, have him sucking on my titties, and distract him with my titty while I strapped his little ass in. And it's like, I'm in public. You know what I'm saying? Like, I'm not even. I'm not even in the car. Like, I'm at my stroller.

[Chris]

This is what somebody without A kid would describe as hell.

[Elizabeth]

Right? That being said, he went to sleep perfectly fine and we enjoyed the rest of the day. Out at the lunch thing, he slept for an hour in the car seat. Then he got up and was a little joy to be around.

[Chris]

See, in my. My point earlier, with the schedule and me, it's like with two kids, if I have both of them, it's gonna be very rare that I can get both of them in sync and not their routine or their habit of their bed. And it's like if I have not one, but two of those going on at the same time because I fucked everything, it's like, ah. And I do agree, memories are important. Going out is important. But sometimes I'm like, not really worth it. If I could just find a different one at a different time, that wouldn't cause that chaos.

[Elizabeth]

This is the last thing I'm going to say. Okay, you're predicting chaos.

[Chris]

I'm not, but I'm avoiding chaos. Why wouldn't I take a 4pm class.

[Elizabeth]

Rather than an But Just hear it though. You're assuming chaos is the only answer.

[Chris]

I just don't even want to enter.

[Elizabeth]

That's what I'm saying. Yeah, and I'm saying why not take a crazy chance?

[Chris]

Because I could just go to a class at 4:15.

[Elizabeth]

That's fine. But like, even talking about if I.

[Chris]

Can avoid it, I will. I can still do the thing, but.

[Elizabeth]

Just choose to hear me without being defensive for one second.

[Chris]

Well, no, not even about that.

[Elizabeth]

I'm just talking about take the kid thing out of it. Don't assume the worst about something and then not try because, you know, you have a feeling it's going to be the worst.

[Chris]

I don't think I do.

[Elizabeth]

You might say I do what you're saying.

[Chris]

You're saying take my kids out of it. In what other scenario would I ever do that?

[Elizabeth]

You're. I'm not even talking about this specific instance. I'm saying just hear me. Hear me when I say the example is if you walk into life and assume that chaos and bloodshed are the only two options, you're gonna avoid doing things. But as Michael Scott said, you miss 100% of the shots. You don't take Wayne Gretzky. Do you get what I'm saying?

[Chris]

I hear you. And if there's a timeframe that is better, that works with my schedule, I'm gonna take it. Okay? That just is what it is.

[Elizabeth]

I know.

[Chris]

We're just different. I mean, we're just different. And that's Fine.

[Elizabeth]

No, I know, but I'm like. I just. I just want you to hear that one thing where it's like. Because I don't want you to limit your life experience because you expect chaos and bloodshed, because that's not always the outcome.

[Chris]

No, I just think. And this won't always be the scenario, but for where they are right now, it just is how I function. It just, It. It works for us. And they're happy children, and I like it that way. They have each other. They're not dying to social interact. I have things at home they can go to classes, they can do things, but I'm not going to disrupt what works so well for them. And that's just me. I know a lot of people will disagree.

[Elizabeth]

No, I know. And that's why I literally said, remove that from this situation.

[Chris]

But I don't think I do that with anything else. I don't think I. I don't think I stop myself from doing anything in fear of outside. Like, what is something I don't do?

[Elizabeth]

Well, it's not that you don't do it, but I will say there's a lot of toiling decision making.

[Chris]

Like what?

[Elizabeth]

Like every decision. Like every decision.

[Chris]

I don't know.

[Elizabeth]

I could whisper an example to you, but I don't want to say it because it's not. Again, we're back to that thing. That was a secret. That's not my secret to tell.

[Chris]

Okay. I'm sick of the secret. That's not your secret to tell.

[Elizabeth]

Can I just whisper it to you?

[Chris]

Yeah. Oh, I told them we could, but.

[Elizabeth]

But that's my point. You see what I mean? But they're like, the toiling to get to that. That's why I'm saying you don't actually do it, but the toiling to get to the discovery of. Yes.

[Chris]

Well, I. This was a. That's traveling with seven people and babies to do a shoot.

[Elizabeth]

No, it's a nightmare. It's a full blown nightmare.

[Chris]

I'm not gonna do two 12 hour filming days and bring babies. It's just like. That isn't a life for them.

[Elizabeth]

No, that's a nightmare.

[Chris]

We're not gonna be with them again.

[Elizabeth]

Take the specifics out of it. But I'm just saying, like the, The. You asked for an example of like the toilet.

[Chris]

Right? I. I will say no.

[Elizabeth]

And then you got to yes. Yeah.

[Chris]

I will say no to things up front because I'm like, oh, that's annoying.

[Elizabeth]

Yeah. But then you get to yes, and you're Always glad you did.

[Chris]

Okay.

[Elizabeth]

Just saying.

[Chris]

Okay.

[Elizabeth]

Germinate. Germinate.

[Chris]

This class. Well, no, literally, their other one is right at breakfast time. I'm like, I can't skip breakfast time. And I'm not waking them up earlier to eat breakfast to go. Like, I'm not. No, that's fine. I just. I could kill this place. I really could.

[Elizabeth]

It's like, unclench.

[Chris]

I just don't understand why, like, they're working with children here.

[Elizabeth]

So crazy. I will say this. There are some psycho things that I've noticed about, like, all of these children. Things I do. I'm like, why are none of these on the weekend? Like, parents work. That's like, they don't do the parent room thing that I do on any of the days of the weekend. But both parents are welcome to come. How can both parents come and have a. You know what I'm saying? In the middle of the day on a weekday?

[Chris]

When she said I was so into, I said, yes, let's do it. And then I'm looking at the three time slots and they're all like, insane. It's just like, what? Every baby is occupied during these time frames. It's like.

[Elizabeth]

And it's. It is crazy. I will give you.

[Chris]

Yes. It's.

[Elizabeth]

I'm fighting a burp.

[Chris]

There's. There's a wide range of ages, but I would say the majority of the kids that are going to go to this class are over 15 months and pretty much all of them sleep from 12 to 2. Yeah. So it's just like, come on, use your head a little bit. If you're a baby specific class, let's work around when their schedules might be.

[Elizabeth]

Or even if you have a class that extends to five year olds who are in kindergarten. Maybe it's not.

[Chris]

The middle of the day just drives me crazy.

[Elizabeth]

Sorry. The burps are crazy.

[Chris]

And Lizzie's more cool, calm, and collected than me. She'll do the things.

[Elizabeth]

No, I just. My whole thing is like, I don't want you to not do something out of a fear of a prediction instead of a fear of an absolute.

[Chris]

I just like that.

[Elizabeth]

Like, I'm never gonna be like, let's go diving with sharks.

[Chris]

Okay.

[Elizabeth]

I will never ask you to do that.

[Chris]

We're just circling back to the same thing, which is, I'm a schedule boy with twins, and I don't think I would be this way if I had a one single baby.

[Elizabeth]

Right.

[Chris]

I think with two babies, it's just drastically different.

[Elizabeth]

It just is. We're gonna. I'M gonna live to eat a sandwich when I have my twins. Do you know what I'm saying?

[Chris]

But you'll probably manage better. I don't know. Maybe.

[Elizabeth]

I mean, I don't know. I'll have three children and two special needs dogs. I'm probably not going to manage better. I'm probably going to lose my fucking mind. And then you're going to be like, why don't you just stop predicting chaos and bloodshed? And I'm going to be standing there literally with bald patches and blood dripping out of every orifice of my body. Like, I'm not predicting. It's real. The chaos and bloodshed is real.

[Chris]

Before you moms come at me for saying I'm not giving my kids a full rounded being, let's talk to the twin moms. Twin moms, enter the chat.

[Elizabeth]

Twin moms, enter the chat. What do you. There's. Can I. Okay, I'm gonna. Oof. I'm gonna talk some shit.

[Chris]

Do it.

[Elizabeth]

It's just because I hate myself and I need to be clear about that. I know a twin mom who has two fucking toddlers, one of which is under two. So she has four children. She. And also her twins are brand fucking new. Like, these girls are two months old. This mom is waking up, working out. She's got a flat stomach already. They have fucking chickens. They have a French bulldog. She's also a fucking like operation nurse. I don't think they have any help.

[Chris]

No way.

[Elizabeth]

There's no way in hell, Rylan. I swear to God. One of the kids or two of the kids might go to daycare. They don't have any help beyond.

[Chris]

And she works.

[Elizabeth]

And she works. She's obviously on mat leave right now, but having twins. And she has a full milk supply. She pumps after every feed and has a gnarly fucking. And feeds two children off of her breasts and tends chickens and has 202. I was like. And a flat stomach. She went online the other day and she's like, posted like, my biological age is seven years older. And I drink water and do all these lists, all the things she does. And then the husband who, like, drinks no water or whatever has like a biological age younger than her. And I'm just like, but those abs, girl. Who cares about your biological age? The. I was like, drop the workout length that you're able to do with that many children, because maybe I can do it too. And it's like. She was like, thank you. And I was like, no, drop the workout routine. And like, when I know her from childhood. Like, she's literally not an influencer. She's a normal person.

[Chris]

Wow.

[Elizabeth]

And I'm like, God damn you. And then I see other things on Instagram where it's like, yeah, you die for your kids, but would you eat healthy? Would you go to the gym? Would you do X? Have you seen those reels?

[Chris]

No.

[Elizabeth]

They make me want to fucking scream.

[Chris]

Now you know how I feel about sensory. I'm just kidding.

[Elizabeth]

No, but yeah, I do. It's a very.

[Chris]

It's just like Instagram will target you on one thing that irks you and they just shove it down your throat until you. That you want to end.

[Elizabeth]

It's like, when is enough enough? Like, yes, I'd love to eat healthy and go to the gym and die for my children, but, like, what can I be alive for them too? Like, how can I? How can I live? How can I live, Question mark?

[Chris]

I also just want to make it clear. I know I have the luxury of being able to do this if I have, like, if and when we have another child, that next child is not going to have the luxury of this schedule because I'll have two toddlers. Like, we're going to just have to do all the things. Do you know what I'm saying?

[Elizabeth]

Yeah. And everyone, like, honestly, everyone keeps saying that, but I haven't wrapped my mind around that logistically either, though.

[Chris]

Well, I'm just. There's going to be no choice. Still going to try to make the naps, but it's just going to be.

[Elizabeth]

A little more on the go.

[Chris]

It's going to be more loosey goosey. It's like, well, your brothers that are toddlers have to do this thing. And here we go. Like, it's not like, I won't. I'm just avoiding if I can.

[Elizabeth]

That's what our sleep consultant said, too. She's like, well, you know, you have the luxury of doing it with number one and then number two. Sort of like, whatever you have to. Whatever you can do. And I'm like, why, though? Like. But do you know what I mean?

[Chris]

Because you're gonna have to take Billy to school, and that's gonna be in the middle of an app. You're gonna have to take Billy to his music class, and that' be when you have to feed. It's just like, so I understand. Like, of course. Like, I'm just able to do this with my kids. So I do. And they only have one nap now. That's one and a half or two hours every day. So it's like if I can keep that nap the same, I'm going to.

[Elizabeth]

You know what's also a bummer?

[Chris]

What?

[Elizabeth]

I found a sick balloon exhibit. Guess where the it is.

[Chris]

Downtown la.

[Elizabeth]

Yeah. What the.

[Chris]

Didn't I. Wasn't I the one that told you? I know somebody that went to the balloon exhibit and they were raving about how incredible it was.

[Elizabeth]

Do you want to go?

[Chris]

Did you hear about from me? And now you're telling it like I.

[Elizabeth]

Were you planning to go with Danny? You bitch.

[Chris]

No, no, this.

[Elizabeth]

Are you and Maddie gonna go to the balloon exhibit with her four kids.

[Chris]

And her toned tummy, her flat stomach? Yeah, she's always pring at Orange Record. Orange Record.

[Elizabeth]

Orange Record.

[Chris]

Should I tell you why I was gonna kill Shane last night or what?

[Elizabeth]

Yeah, go ahead.

[Shane]

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[Chris]

And my neck so that I look.

[Shane]

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[Chris]

Okay. I. When I have guests, let whoever sleep in my bedroom because it's like a little apartment up there. It's easier for them to have it than to be kind of displaced in the house because we no longer have a guest room. Because my kids have separate rooms. Because whatever I do whatever they want. Okay. I let them sleep during their naps.

[Elizabeth]

Oh my God. I'm calling cps.

[Chris]

So. But the problem is the other room is Shane's office slash bedroom. And I can't go to sleep in there because he's working or like he walks. He's not ready to go to sleep. When I'm ready to go to sleep, I'm down sleeping on the couch. And so my family's been here for a week and every night I've been saying, text me when you go to sleep. Because I don't want him to wake me up. Because if I'm in a shame, because if I'm in a deep sleep and he wakes me up, like, I'm going to bed now, then fuck you, it's all over. So text me. So when I wake up organically, I see that you're asleep and I walk my ass upstairs. I implemented this rule because the night previous it looked so pitch black up there. It's 3, 3am I wake up, I'm like, safe for me to go up there. He's just watching TV with his headphones in, like, not ready to go to bed yet. He's like, I'm not ready to go to bed. And I was like, well, I'm not packing, I'm not going downstairs my shit. And then coming back up the next time, I naturally wake up. So I set in motion. They text me, I'm going to sleep. So when I wake up, I just go with me last night at 3am, this motherfucker comes and shakes me when I'm in a deep sleep.

[Elizabeth]

Oh, the rage that just.

[Chris]

I'm going to bed and I open my eyes and I thought, I want you dead. I want you dead. We've been filming for 17 days in a row.

[Elizabeth]

Yeah.

[Chris]

And I just was in such a deep sleep, I could kill you. I said, what happened to texting me? I went to sleep. He was like, what? I was like, I've told you this three nights in a row and it hasn't worked. What's going on?

[Elizabeth]

Yeah.

[Chris]

And so I Get over. I just pack my stuff because I.

[Elizabeth]

Texted him and I haven't heard back.

[Chris]

And then I have to pee. You haven't?

[Elizabeth]

No. Did you kill him?

[Chris]

Well, it gets worse.

[Elizabeth]

No, he killed him.

[Chris]

So I'm. I'm packing my stuff up, I go upstairs, I have to pee really bad. I almost shared too much.

[Elizabeth]

You?

[Chris]

No, I didn't. But you know when you have to pee. So this is.

[Elizabeth]

You had a boner.

[Chris]

Yes, because I had to pee so bad. But it's not because I'm horny.

[Elizabeth]

Listen, I live with 10 men. I get it.

[Chris]

Like, you wake up.

[Elizabeth]

I wake up with a boner. Because when I have a boner right now, I have to pee so bad. As a matter of fact, you have.

[Chris]

To pee so bad that you're, like, hard until you can pee. And it's like, I want to know what super relatable. What the. Does that happen to you, Chris? It has happened to me.

[Elizabeth]

Yeah. It happens to all of us.

[Chris]

Right. I wonder how big your dick is.

[Elizabeth]

It's big.

[Chris]

It's big. So I go in his, like, bathroom in his room to pee. I smell cat poison. And it's the cat poison. I call it cat poison because if the litter box isn't functioning right and it's just cat piss marinating in the litter, I know that it's just this odor that permeates the entire fucking room. And it's, like, so poisonous, you immediately have, like, a sinus allergy infection.

[Elizabeth]

I know people who smell like that.

[Chris]

And so I'm like, already awoken. I look over there. It's like an electric litter box that does everything for you. All you have to do is top off the litter and empty. Pull out the tray and empty it like a trash. I look, and it's frozen halfway with mounds of shit and piss all over it. And I was like, this is the one fucking job I give Shane is to clean the litter box that I had to put in his bathroom. Because if Louie doesn't have his own, he shits in my house.

[Elizabeth]

House. Oh, my God.

[Chris]

And so then I start huffing and puffing. I do like, what, too?

[Elizabeth]

That's enraging.

[Chris]

Because it's like, this is your one job. This is your one household job. And he's like, finally, after I'm like, huffing and puffing for three minutes and I can't get it to work, I realize he's topped off the litter so high that the electric litter box won't. So then I have to go find something to scoop the Litter into a trash bag. 3am full of shit at 3am Now I'm up, up. I'm just up. I'm gonna say, I did it. I don't know what you want. I did it. And I was like, I know you tried to do it, but, like, what about you didn't see the fill line that, like, couldn't be anything other than a fill line. Like, you're not supposed to go over the fill line. And then I was so mad that then when I went to bed, like four minutes later, I was like, I'm sorry. I love you. I know you tried your best. I know you tried to go through the motions of doing what I asked you to do.

[Elizabeth]

Yeah.

[Chris]

It's just infuriating in my mind that it wasn't executed in the right way. So then I'm like, okay, we're both going to bed. I said, I'm sorry for being the asshole that I was. I was just infuriated.

[Elizabeth]

Like, you're a victim in this.

[Chris]

I love him very much though. And he did try. And so.

[Elizabeth]

Right. But it's like close only counts and fucking. And then the thing that hand grenades.

[Chris]

The thing that tops it all off is now I'm up. Now I'm thinking about moments throughout the day that like, whatever. And I look over and he's already not snoring, but, like, sleeping.

[Elizabeth]

You better woke in tomorrow.

[Chris]

And I was like, oh, my fucking God, now you're asleep. And I'm up for an hour when I have to film tomorrow morning. And that just took an hour off of my sleep.

[Elizabeth]

This was last night?

[Chris]

Yes. No, it was last night.

[Elizabeth]

That's fucked.

[Chris]

I love him so much. He just tried to do what he thought I, his bossy wife wanted him.

[Elizabeth]

To do and he fucked it royally.

[Chris]

But he fucked it royally.

[Elizabeth]

Sorry.

[Chris]

Can you believe that?

[Elizabeth]

Yeah.

[Chris]

Wow.

[Elizabeth]

Men. Men are gonna men, dude. Men are gonna men out in these streets.

[Chris]

And Joe's screaming. Joe screaming something awful in the beach.

[Elizabeth]

Oh, my God. Every time I'm taking a cute video, Joe feels the need to scream something awful in the background. It's fucking crazy.

[Chris]

I was taking a seat trying to ruin your cut.

[Elizabeth]

Honestly, I'm like, can you shut the fuck up? Can you shut the fuck up? The dogs are being cute and playing the other day and he screams in the room, what the fuck is that? Lizzie? Lizzy. Lizzie, do you hear that? Do you hear that, Lizzie? Yes. What? He says what? He can't hear you. Do you hear that? Get the fuck up and go look at Whatever you think the fucking sound is, bro. God damn. I'm filming the dogs. He's screaming, fuuuuu. Oh, fuh.

[Chris]

Honestly, you should probably just post it.

[Elizabeth]

What?

[Chris]

What? Just a bird that's wiling out out there.

[Elizabeth]

Oh, I can't hear anything because I have the headphones on. I was like, is someone at the door?

[Chris]

Jason, Kelsey's wife talks about the name of their fourth baby girl.

[Elizabeth]

Yeah.

[Chris]

What do you mean talks about? Bring us in. Oh, what's the story here?

[Elizabeth]

They are. You doing some iced tea?

[Chris]

I was reading. Yeah.

[Elizabeth]

It's a hot day.

[Chris]

Yeah. Oh, it's so hot out.

[Elizabeth]

It's a hot. So hot outside. I'm sweating on the palms.

[Chris]

This is the only iced tea, by the way.

[Elizabeth]

Which, by the way, you were only gonna give me one anyway.

[Chris]

Well, no, I added the chaparral Rome, but I jumped to it too early.

[Elizabeth]

Because chaparral is so good.

[Chris]

I guess it also came to my attention. Listen, I don't need to make enemies today, do I? I know nothing about this woman. I know nothing other than Instagram.

[Elizabeth]

I'm a little gay for her, and I hate her, which means she's kind of a man.

[Chris]

I know nothing other than what Instagram shoves in my face about her, and it's not. Then Morgan told me on the same podcast, she was talking. Talking about how she hates. Hates nice cars, won't drive a nice car. And I'm like, okay, but you're rich, and the only thing you're doing from keeping your. From buying yourself a nice car is enjoying the luxury that a nice car offers you.

[Elizabeth]

What does she mean by a nice car? Like, is she talking about, like, hating a car that works and functions?

[Chris]

Again, I didn't.

[Elizabeth]

Or is she hating, like, my piss missile car? Because, honestly, I hate my piss.

[Chris]

I think she's talking about any luxury vehicle. She's just like, like, I won't do a luxury vehicle. And it's like, I hear what you're saying, but you're rich now, and the only person you're harming by, like, acting better than is yourself from not enjoying the luxuries of a luxury car. I don't know, she just panders to everyone, whatever.

[Elizabeth]

I don't know that she's pandering to anyone, but it is enraging to listen to someone who's rich as being like, God, I hate my money. Eat my money, then get rid of it. You hate your money so much, get rid of it.

[Chris]

And if you hate being famous so much, stop dressing in the most attention seeking outfits. There, I said it.

[Elizabeth]

Wow.

[Chris]

And that's all I have to say about her.

[Elizabeth]

So there was chaos and bloodshed after all.

[Chris]

I can't with somebody that wants to be famous so bad and then is so mad at being famous, it drives me crazy. Taylor Swift isn't out here in these streets complaining about being famous, hiding snot.

[Elizabeth]

Rockets cuz she's so sick and grateful for her position in this world.

[Chris]

Of course she's annoyed as, but she uses what she can to her advantage.

[Elizabeth]

All right, I want to run my hands through your hair, but I know you'd literally throat punch me. I just want to touch it so bad.

[Chris]

Okay, back to Jason, Kelsey's wife, talking.

[Elizabeth]

About the name of they're blessed and get to have a fourth baby. And they were just talking about it. Honestly, I don't know why I put it there, Finley.

[Chris]

Oh, you wrote something under it.

[Elizabeth]

What did I put?

[Chris]

You're allowed to have your own opinion, but I actually don't care what it is. And I mean that in the most, like, loving and respectful way. Is this in regards to their child's name?

[Elizabeth]

That was. Yes, but I didn't say that. That's what she said. She's like, you can hate my kid's name. I don't give a fuck what you think. It's not your kid. And honestly, period.

[Chris]

Yeah, why would you?

[Elizabeth]

I mean, sometimes I do. And then I'm like, people are making.

[Chris]

Fun of Billy's name.

[Elizabeth]

No, no, no, no, no. But I'm like, I want to name my next kid Ernest. Like the word Ernest.

[Chris]

Right?

[Elizabeth]

And people are like that. And I want to say to you, no, sir. You know what? We got all twisted up in that stupid gymnastics and all I want to talk about is some people I went to high school with. Oh, I can't focus without it without talking about them.

[Chris]

Yeah, what kind of drama. Can you reel it in quickly?

[Elizabeth]

This is kind of hot goss, you guys. And honestly, I'm the only one who cares that it's been 20.

[Chris]

Should I take back everything I said about Chaparral Rome?

[Elizabeth]

You can cut that or the gymnastics bit and use this if you want to save time. Can I please do a deep dive?

[Chris]

Well, my family's gonna be waiting for.

[Elizabeth]

No one wants to talk about it with me. And it's been 20 fucking years. And I have feelings and I think there's developments, but I can't see what's going on because all the parties involved have blocked me on social media because I am the Only person who's crazy enough to give a fuck after 20 years.

[Chris]

What did they do?

[Elizabeth]

Well, Rylan, thank you for asking. Oh, I'm involved in drama, but you're.

[Chris]

Blocked on all accounts, so you're not.

[Elizabeth]

Well, they've tried to uninvolve me, but you can't uninvolved a person that's this dedicated to something so petty and stupid. The year was 2007, and I was a young, spry chicken, about 16, 17, cusping, and I had a crush on a boy. And this boy was loosely dating a girl. They were on again, off again, not really together. Do you know what I'm saying?

[Chris]

Okay.

[Elizabeth]

Anyway, he started kissing me, and I was like, oh, my goodness. It's all happening for me. For months, me and this boy be kissing, and he was publicly out with this girl, like, going to prom with her and shit, but wouldn't call her his girlfriend, which became a pattern of behavior, and I should have seen it as a young girl. Cut to.

[Chris]

Wouldn't you wish his friend would have told you? And.

[Elizabeth]

No, I knew. Okay, I knew. But I also knew they weren't boyfriend and girlfriend. And I just assumed at one point, one of us would become a girlfriend and it would stop.

[Chris]

Right?

[Elizabeth]

And I think I might have been the only person that knew about the other girl. I'm gonna go ahead and say my hands are very dirty, and I'm not trying to live in a glass house.

[Chris]

So you are the gossip. You're just wanting to tell us about your gossip.

[Elizabeth]

Cut two. Me and this young man are together for an extended period of time. Probably the most hideous, abusive relationship of my entire life. If we.

[Chris]

Whoa.

[Elizabeth]

We're gonna have to bleep that.

[Chris]

Is this why you're so attracted to me?

[Elizabeth]

There's nothing attractive about this guy. I had a drinking problem, and my godmother died. And I was like, nothing can change in my life because she knew about this person, and it was all bad anyway. Cut 2. I get some sense knocked into me.

[Chris]

How my neck's hurting.

[Elizabeth]

Don't look at me.

[Chris]

Okay.

[Elizabeth]

Is your neck tired?

[Chris]

It really is.

[Elizabeth]

My dad talks some sense to me. He goes, you don't want to be with this person. Break up with this person. I was like, you're tripping. He's like, no, I'm not trying to break up with this person. I break up with that person. He moves in with the girl that he was seeing in high school when we were all together. Do you know what I'm saying?

[Chris]

Yes.

[Elizabeth]

Then he starts dating Another girl, Not that girl. And then the three of them live together. And he's still like, it's.

[Chris]

Are they all sleeping together? Or is he with one of them and broken up with another? But they're called cool.

[Elizabeth]

So he's with the new girl and the old girl. Like the. The. My predecessor lives with them.

[Chris]

Okay.

[Elizabeth]

Then my predecessor marries these two. They get married, then these two break up. A divorce. Which, by the way, that was an exciting time in my life as well. Cause I'm a sick fuck. And I know all of this because every 15 years. No, that's not true. Like, every five years, I'll get a weird little Spidey sense. I'm like, I think so. And so is engaged. Can somebody check on it? And they'll be like, oh, my God, they are engaged. How did you know? And it's like, I just had a feeling. Cause I'm crazy.

[Chris]

I really can't look at you. I'm sorry.

[Elizabeth]

Don't do it. Then I had a feeling something was up. I was like, they're either get having a baby or they're getting divorced. And someone looked and went, oh, my God, I think they're getting a divorce. Because he is out doing a bunch of stuff and has Instagram titles. Like, I know I've had a rough year. And, like, all their pictures together are kind of gone. And they, like, there's no. Like, it seems like they're done now.

[Chris]

This is feeling like Sydney Sweeney's Instagram.

[Elizabeth]

Right? Cut to. They are done. And if you look at his.

[Chris]

You.

[Elizabeth]

Can see that he's been venmoing my predecessor. So they are in cahoots and they're visiting each other. And I have followed her this entire time. She never unblocked. She never blocked me. Until recently when I had a feeling, I said, I think my predecessor and my ex are a thing. Finally. This girl seems like she's been waiting in the wings for all 20 years. And the fact that she has unfollowed me or blocked me or whatever it may be that she did is a real sign.

[Chris]

Are there any kids in the picture?

[Elizabeth]

No, of course not.

[Chris]

Oh, thank God.

[Elizabeth]

Just a couple wiener dogs. Well, now I think it's just one wiener dog rip. This is how much I still know when you block me. So you might as well just unblock me so I can know it all firsthand, because I'm a mother and I'm tired and I don't have enough time for this investigative journalism. But if you just let me in, I'm Gonna find out anyway, and I'm not gonna talk to you. I used to think it was really funny to request them as friends, though, because this is crazy. Good.

[Morgan]

All of it.

[Chris]

No, I love it. But I do want to get to a quick bit of advice, though, because we have an update from last week that got us in a real tizzy about the guy that was now dating a girl who had just.

[Elizabeth]

Gay Batman fucked a guy. Gay Batman?

[Chris]

I was acting as gay Batman in the scenario. Hey, guys, there is an update. The girl and the guy ended up breaking up pretty quickly. Phew. Wish I knew the details about why, but I don't think he ever came out to her about his sexual history with my friend. That was a guy. Thank you so much for putting my question on the show. So, listen, there's. There was no gay Batman, to our knowledge.

[Elizabeth]

So someone still could fly in and out this man, but I still. Time.

[Chris]

But maybe I did just telepathically help this woman know that she needed to run from this guy because he was gonna leave her for another guy.

[Elizabeth]

I mean, I. It's a tale as old as time, if unsettled in your person. People aren't going to settle with you, period. No gay Batman needed. You're busy.

[Chris]

Oh, wow. Do you remember the.

[Elizabeth]

I'm pissing my pants.

[Chris]

We gotta go.

[Elizabeth]

It's 52 minutes.

[Chris]

Okay. We're gonna do advice, though, next week because there's really juicy ones. Oh, like I was getting.

[Elizabeth]

You're edging. Should we just do one, and then if we need to cut any of the.

[Chris]

No, because we're gonna go eat with my family and it's already. Whatever. We've gotta go.

[Elizabeth]

We'll just cut everything. We gotta go cut the whole first 50.

[Chris]

See you guys later.

[Shane]

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[Chris]

Hello, everybody, and welcome back to the food portion of the sip. We were gonna go get dill pickles from. It still sounds like Popeyes. And then Shane was like, actually, the Kardashian clap is this week and this week only. Let's do it.

[Morgan]

First of all, I didn't say that originally. Originally, Chris told you. You shot the idea down?

[Chris]

No, no, I just said we had already planned on the deal. And I was like, we're doing the deal.

[Morgan]

I get a not. I get a notification turned on from Crumbles saying, breaking news, Kardashian collab drops. And I was like, this is a joke, right? Like, what does that even mean? A Kardashian cookie? Although I trust Khloe, and that's not. I don't know. I just do.

[Elizabeth]

Yeah.

[Chris]

Everyone trusts.

[Elizabeth]

If I trust Kimmy Kardashian, it is Chloe Kardashian.

[Chris]

She's dropping.

[Morgan]

I feel like that sounded like a mean. I wasn't literally not trying to be mean. I just trust her.

[Chris]

Everyone trusts Chloe. It's not. It's nothing to worry about.

[Ryland]

Token favorite Kardashian, period.

[Chris]

And it's what she deserves.

[Morgan]

I was like, oh, my God. You're doing this for the sip, right? And you're like, oh, yeah. Kris told me about that. But no. And I was like, well, we had already planned. Did you not do this?

[Chris]

We had already planned on doing the deal.

[Morgan]

Celebrities, food. The thumbnail makes itself. How are we all gonna fit?

[Chris]

Okay, listen up, ladies and gentlemen. I forgot what I was gonna say.

[Elizabeth]

Have we already done the reveal?

[Ryland]

Does each individual Kardashian get their own cookie?

[Chris]

That's what I wanted to ask. Are they all promoting it?

[Elizabeth]

Yeah.

[Chris]

How much does Is it on their Instagram?

[Elizabeth]

Just want to see them.

[Chris]

Just hold on. The anticipation is building, and it's making everything even better.

[Elizabeth]

I'm pregnant with twins.

[Chris]

Whose cookie? I know they have assigned cookies, but are they all promoting it? And how much does that cost? Crummy. To have. Have a collaboration with them.

[Elizabeth]

Check their Instagrams.

[Chris]

I. I'm busy. I'm filming.

[Ryland]

We just said apparel spritzes at 2. I don't think you're busy.

[Elizabeth]

Can I look at them now?

[Chris]

No, Lizzy, just go away.

[Elizabeth]

Let me look at them.

[Chris]

Well, she can't help herself. Nothing on Kylie's Instagram.

[Morgan]

I would say the postmate did well. No, I don't want it.

[Chris]

Never mind. What?

[Elizabeth]

What?

[Morgan]

I just had a very weird interaction because he was very sweet, but I ordered two boxes. Boxes of these because I Was like, there's so many of us. And then he only came with one. I was like, oh, I think there's supposed to be two. And he goes, I don't know.

[Elizabeth]

And then.

[Morgan]

So maybe there's a bunch inside the box. I said, no, that's not. I don't think so. And then he goes, well, let's see. So then I tried to open the box, but there's a sticker on it. And then he tried. So if you look, me. And his fingers.

[Elizabeth]

Wow.

[Chris]

So did Crumble give you your money back?

[Morgan]

We're like touching fingers. It was a lot. It was a lot. It was really funny.

[Elizabeth]

That's almost like cheating.

[Chris]

I know.

[Elizabeth]

Oh, my God.

[Morgan]

And then he got nervous and he's like, oh, okay. And I was like, oh, okay. And then he left.

[Elizabeth]

And then I said, did your fingers ever touch?

[Morgan]

Yes.

[Chris]

Did Crumble give you your money back for the second box?

[Morgan]

Yes, they did. He was very sweet and. Yeah.

[Ryland]

Yeah. Okay.

[Chris]

Do you want to guess who's this?

[Elizabeth]

I want to look at the fucking cookie. Oh, yeah, I love that. Can I look?

[Chris]

Yes. Open her up.

[Elizabeth]

Oh, okay.

[Chris]

Full disclosure.

[Elizabeth]

I cheated and I already know who wants it.

[Chris]

All of them.

[Elizabeth]

Don't say, yes, I know who that one belongs to.

[Morgan]

I will say it's really funny because now that the Kardashians are like, controversial, or maybe they always have. I don't know. I don't know what's going on.

[Chris]

Are they controversial?

[Morgan]

All the snack accounts I follow, they're reviewing these today and they're like, okay, guys, I'm not endorsing the Kardashians. It's just the calories and the cookies. Don't get mad at me. I'm like, oh, my God.

[Ryland]

You know what? Every video on my channel that has the Kardashians in the title is my most viewed video on that channel.

[Elizabeth]

Can I clump onto it?

[Chris]

Well, no. We haven't even decided whose is who. Will you film a little bit, Chris? Sure.

[Morgan]

I know that's Chloe's.

[Ryland]

That's giving Rob to me.

[Chris]

Oh, I don't think Rob.

[Ryland]

Why do they always run? Invite Rob.

[Elizabeth]

Okay, every guesses. Your guess was this one is, well.

[Morgan]

That one looks the best. Which means it's Chloe.

[Elizabeth]

Should I reveal?

[Chris]

Yeah.

[Elizabeth]

Yes.

[Chris]

Oh, sprinkles. Scream Kylie to me with the pink top.

[Elizabeth]

Do you want me to reveal?

[Chris]

Yeah, yeah.

[Ryland]

That's gotta be Kim.

[Morgan]

Oh, really?

[Ryland]

I was gonna say, cuz she has to be different than all her sisters.

[Morgan]

I was gonna say that's Courtney because.

[Chris]

That looks Kind of like, is it pooshified?

[Morgan]

He looks.

[Ryland]

It's like vegan and gluten free.

[Chris]

If it was Courtney, I would say she's.

[Elizabeth]

I'll tell you what it is. That's a flourless chocolate cake.

[Chris]

Oh, it's Courtney. And they probably had to convince her to do it. She's very like, no, it's Courtney.

[Ryland]

Who on earth wants a flourless cake? Get real, girls at home. You're lying to yourselves and your mams.

[Chris]

Okay, mom thinks this. The double cake is Chris.

[Ryland]

Chris.

[Chris]

How come?

[Ryland]

Because it's the most elaborate, elaborate. Thank you very much.

[Elizabeth]

It's like her pirate shirts and it's.

[Ryland]

Yeah, it's so marketable.

[Chris]

Okay, let us know.

[Elizabeth]

It is.

[Chris]

Are you ever really just guessing all these. If we don't know the Kardashians and.

[Ryland]

I don't even watch it.

[Chris]

Okay, so who's left?

[Morgan]

That's Kim, Kendall, and. Oh, wait, I don't know.

[Chris]

Oh, I'm. Who else is there?

[Elizabeth]

Okay, so this one is a snickerdoodle crumb cake. Oh, this one's a cookie dough.

[Chris]

What sister's left.

[Elizabeth]

Kim and Kendall.

[Chris]

Oh, Kim is cookie dough.

[Morgan]

I don't know.

[Chris]

Kim is cookie.

[Elizabeth]

I don't know.

[Chris]

Here's.

[Morgan]

Here's why I'm going to say no. Because that one looks like Kim. But do you know what I mean?

[Chris]

Like, I think it's Kim.

[Ryland]

That's the most basic crumble. It's gotta be Kendall. And she was like, you just throw something in.

[Elizabeth]

Yeah.

[Morgan]

That's why I feel like this one is more like they took time to figure this out, which makes me think Kim and Kendall's like, sure, whatever.

[Chris]

Agree. Because Kim actually cares about everything. I will give her that. What do you think?

[Elizabeth]

What do you know? Give me one minute.

[Chris]

You got a.

[Elizabeth]

In a shocking turn of events, Shane, you are right again.

[Chris]

Cookie dough is Kendall. And then what is this cookie?

[Elizabeth]

Snickerdoodle.

[Chris]

Snickerdoodle. Let's start with snickerdoodle. Our girl Kimberly. Oh, it's hard.

[Ryland]

You're the one that's always like, I love a crunchy. Oh, no, no, Never mind.

[Chris]

Cut that.

[Ryland]

He hates the crunchy cookie.

[Elizabeth]

Cut that.

[Chris]

I'm exactly that. In the opposite direction.

[Morgan]

Take a piece.

[Chris]

This is Kim.

[Elizabeth]

Yes. I'm gonna grab a little piece of Kim.

[Morgan]

Crumberly. Crumbly. Kardashian.

[Ryland]

Crumberly. Okay, okay.

[Chris]

Are we going for it? Are we waiting?

[Morgan]

Is that our new daughter?

[Elizabeth]

Somebody just go crumbly. That good? That good. It's okay.

[Morgan]

It's Fine.

[Ryland]

It's too thick to be a snickerdoodle. I feel like a snickerdoodle needs to be thinner and more crispy on the edges.

[Chris]

I like. I love any and all snickerdoodles, though.

[Morgan]

I'm biased.

[Chris]

If there was a. Oh, go ahead. I like the crunch on top. I like the crunch on top. Like the pies that have those little cake crunches. Yes. Fuck. Give it to me.

[Morgan]

Kim, is there, like, a Kardashian milk?

[Chris]

Oh, skim milk.

[Morgan]

I need to work for that.

[Elizabeth]

You need to get in touch. I was just gonna say you need to get in touch with these people.

[Chris]

I have baby milk.

[Elizabeth]

I have breast milk.

[Chris]

Give it to me, Mommy.

[Elizabeth]

There's some in the fridge. I'm not letting you suck on my nipples.

[Chris]

The more that I eat it, the more I like it. This tastes like milk. The, like, cream thingy on top. I really like it. You guys are losers that don't like it. I'm cutting the next one. We go to the head of the class.

[Ryland]

It's not that I hate it. I just have high hopes that I'm gonna like all the rest of them more.

[Chris]

Okay.

[Ryland]

It doesn't really taste like a Snicker Kylie cake.

[Chris]

Kylie has got me fucked up with her option because it's the classic sugar cookie, but it has the sprinkles.

[Morgan]

This is what I've been asking for. Literally, like, because I love the Funfetti one, but there's no frosting on it. Or there is, but it's not the almond one. And this one has the almond.

[Chris]

All it takes is our girl Kylie to collab with crumbl to make it happen.

[Ryland]

Yeah.

[Chris]

It's like a pink sprinkled donut taste in it. Yeah. Everyone take one.

[Ryland]

There's no one that doesn't like the pink sprinkle.

[Morgan]

Wait a minute. I'm not smelling the almond.

[Elizabeth]

What if they got de almond fied?

[Ryland]

This is a terrifying.

[Elizabeth]

Okay, I'm taking the big piece.

[Chris]

Oh. I mean, I love it, but it doesn't have that signature.

[Ryland]

I'm going from the back so it's like the sprinkles in my mouth.

[Morgan]

Does it?

[Elizabeth]

Oh, no.

[Morgan]

Why would they do that? Oh, I love it, but there's no almond flavor.

[Chris]

I like it better without the almond.

[Ryland]

I love almond in it.

[Elizabeth]

It's not the almond. I think it's a cream cheese frosting.

[Chris]

God, I love it. I love it, too.

[Ryland]

I would give it a solid 9.9 out of 10.

[Elizabeth]

Sorry.

[Chris]

I love the almond, but this Is very good.

[Ryland]

And with the sprinkles and the sprinkles are coated on the bottom and baked into the bottom.

[Elizabeth]

It's too sweet for me.

[Chris]

Okay.

[Elizabeth]

I'm happy to hold it. I think I like cookies released.

[Chris]

Oh, my God.

[Elizabeth]

I think I'm a good camera woman.

[Chris]

Okay.

[Ryland]

It is cream cheese frost.

[Morgan]

Can we. Are we saving Chris for the end?

[Chris]

No, but I think we need to do a night for Chris here. I don't think I can.

[Elizabeth]

It's probably not going to work.

[Chris]

Wow. I actually really like the pink one.

[Ryland]

The pink is phenomenal.

[Chris]

Both for me. I would eat.

[Morgan]

Oh, my God.

[Chris]

I like the pink even more.

[Morgan]

Is it dry?

[Elizabeth]

Okay, well, if I'm. If I'm back there, I can see everyone.

[Chris]

I know, but. Okay, do a mixture of both where you can see everyone and where you zoom in for reviews.

[Morgan]

Oh, we're going to need milk.

[Chris]

I have the milk.

[Morgan]

This is dry. This is dry.

[Chris]

It's dry.

[Elizabeth]

He needs a meal.

[Ryland]

A Funfetti cake with a confetti frosting.

[Chris]

So Kylie's. But the cake version. Yes, yes, yes. I think they have that after you've had Suzy cakes.

[Morgan]

Wow. Look how dry that is. But I think it's supposed to be. Isn't yellow cake kind of dry?

[Chris]

I don't know.

[Morgan]

That's like, the whole thing.

[Chris]

It doesn't feel that dry. The little chocolate curls on top is a nice touch. The cake is. The cake isn't anything to phone home about.

[Ryland]

It's giving Ralph sheet cake for sure.

[Morgan]

I would say you're saying that like a bad thing.

[Chris]

I would say that would have been a compliment. And I disagree. This is worse. But I like the frosting.

[Morgan]

I think it's beautiful. So I don't even care. Like, do you know what I mean? Like, it's so pretty.

[Ryland]

I'm like, okay, it looks like crisp. It just doesn't taste like crisp.

[Chris]

The frosting would have been on a better cake. That could be a purse or air.

[Elizabeth]

Is it like Medieval Times cake? No.

[Chris]

That was incredible.

[Ryland]

Oh, the frosting on that was like the frosting on a donut.

[Chris]

Oh, yeah. That was so processed and crazy and delicious. I think I like this more than everyone here.

[Morgan]

I really like it. This is the biggest Kardashian.

[Chris]

I guess I am gonna get Spencer. Spencer. I love it. That's like, yellow cake and chocolate fries. I love it. You didn't think it was a little dry? It was. I mean, it could have been better.

[Elizabeth]

But, like, I like.

[Morgan]

I just love that.

[Ryland]

Like, keep in mind, Spencer doesn't like ice cream.

[Elizabeth]

What?

[Chris]

Okay, let me defend myself. I'm okay. I don't like. I like ice cream, but I'm not.

[Elizabeth]

Like, oh, ice cream.

[Ryland]

I adopted you.

[Chris]

Oh, you can always send me back.

[Elizabeth]

Fantastic. The streets.

[Morgan]

Okay, we're cutting, Chloe.

[Chris]

Okay, what are the frosting balls? I'm kind of concerned. It looks like Tokyo. You don't want any?

[Elizabeth]

I'm taking time on. Okay.

[Morgan]

Oh. Oh.

[Chris]

Is it butter or frosting?

[Morgan]

It kind of tastes like chewed up Oreos.

[Chris]

But do I like, like, I baby birded you Oreos or like Chloe baby boarded you Oreo?

[Elizabeth]

Show up, Spencer.

[Chris]

She does love it. Does taste like cheetah.

[Morgan]

I don't know how I feel about it.

[Elizabeth]

I like it.

[Chris]

Yeah, no, it tastes like. Yeah, a dumped in milk Oreo.

[Morgan]

That's a better way to put it.

[Chris]

Because it's the same flavor. It's just mine Sounds more appetizing.

[Ryland]

Kind of tastes burnt, like, a little too much. It tastes like charboil to me.

[Chris]

Okay, we are going into Kendall Jenner. This looks delicious.

[Morgan]

Saving the gross one for the.

[Chris]

Oh.

[Morgan]

What if it's good, though? What if Courtney came through?

[Chris]

Honestly, I feel like she's annoying enough.

[Shane]

To come through, and I say that.

[Chris]

Because I'm the annoying one.

[Morgan]

You're the Courtney for sure.

[Chris]

I'm the Courtney.

[Morgan]

This is more expensive. This is $2 upcharge.

[Chris]

Is this the flowerless?

[Elizabeth]

Yes, sir.

[Ryland]

They really charge you two extra dollars on the Kardashian?

[Chris]

No, just on this one.

[Ryland]

I started taking Kourtney Kardashian's sleep gummies, and I haven't had her wrestling night in months.

[Chris]

Courtney's doing a good job as well, because when I told Morgan that's Courtney's brand, she was like, no, it's not. I was like, yeah, it is.

[Ryland]

I was getting. Trying to get everyone on the let me sleep gummies because I was like, you will be. She's been feeding them to me, and it's worked.

[Chris]

It tastes flourless.

[Morgan]

Oh. Oh, that's going in the trash.

[Elizabeth]

Oh, no.

[Chris]

It's dull and lifeless. I've never had something flourless and be like, oh, my God, this is so good.

[Morgan]

It tastes like fish.

[Ryland]

Does flourless mean gluten free?

[Elizabeth]

Maybe. Maybe not, though.

[Ryland]

Did you get some of that, Brian?

[Chris]

Oh, yeah. Did you? Not yet.

[Ryland]

It tastes like when you made the.

[Chris]

Brownies in the mug.

[Morgan]

Why does it taste like shrimp something? Am I the only one tasting here?

[Elizabeth]

Shrimp?

[Chris]

If you were trying to be healthy and you weren't comparing it to other crumble cookies Maybe you could convince yourself, like, oh, it's fine.

[Ryland]

Single person that's trying to be on their health and wellness for me is stopping crumble to look for their healthy option of the week. This is not fine.

[Elizabeth]

No, no.

[Ryland]

Like, if you're gonna do a crumble, don't skip out on it.

[Chris]

It tastes like tasty mud.

[Morgan]

That's my stripper name.

[Chris]

Tasty mud.

[Morgan]

Get in this tasty mud hole.

[Chris]

Yeah, it's pretty. It's very awful. Spencer's, like, trying to chase it with something. It's so bad.

[Morgan]

Yeah, that was really bad.

[Ryland]

You're expecting fudge?

[Morgan]

Hurry. Get Spencer some breast milk.

[Chris]

Look, that's the only one that's not good to me so far.

[Morgan]

Wow.

[Ryland]

Oh, there's hair on it. There is no chocolate.

[Chris]

Every time I eat.

[Elizabeth]

Is it a Kendall?

[Chris]

It's our. It's our.

[Morgan]

It's our house, and I'm done.

[Chris]

Anytime I eat anything here, there's hair on it.

[Elizabeth]

Whoa.

[Chris]

It's something.

[Ryland]

I love their whole reputation.

[Elizabeth]

Sounds like Chris isn't getting any more food here. Wow.

[Morgan]

Sounds like I'm not seeing anyone anymore.

[Ryland]

You're done.

[Chris]

This is so, so damn good.

[Elizabeth]

Kendall's is.

[Ryland]

Mm.

[Chris]

Wow. Kendall came through.

[Ryland]

It's everything you would want it to be. It's really good.

[Chris]

Whoa. It gives cookie dough, which is crazy for a cookie dough. Yeah, no, there were some crunchy ones in the bunch. This is chewy, soft, delicate, and nice.

[Ryland]

And the frosting's good. Oh, well, even to the Jenner girls.

[Elizabeth]

You don't like it.

[Ryland]

Kylie and Kendall are the only ones that are ready to make a cookie that's worth anyone's time.

[Chris]

I like Kim's, too, but Kim always works so hard. It's like, I just gotta give it to her, you know? She tries so hard, and I love somebody that tries hard. The last one was so bad that I can still taste it while eating this one. It's kind of ruined the following cookie.

[Ryland]

Horrible.

[Elizabeth]

Like.

[Ryland]

Oh, maybe they did it wrong.

[Chris]

You love them too.

[Elizabeth]

I loved all of them.

[Chris]

All right. Your eyes. Well, I think this is available for the rest of the week, so go get yourself some Kardashian crumble cookies. Thank you all for being here. They're really good.

[Elizabeth]

Yeah, skip out on the Kardashian cook. What? You guys only like the Jenners.

[Chris]

Oh, right. Just get the Jenners and Kim. Okay, thank you for watching this tip. Subscribe to everyone. I'll list everyone's links in the description section below. We love you very much. We'll see you next week. Goodbye. And that's the sip.