1396: Panama by Sarah Green

Summary

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Podcast Summary: The Slowdown: Poetry & Reflection Daily

Episode 1396: “Panama” by Sarah Green

Host: Maggie Smith
Release Date: November 14, 2025
Brought to you by: American Public Media & The Poetry Foundation

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Episode Overview

In this episode, host Maggie Smith reflects on the aftermath of relationships and the gratitude that can emerge from their loss. Through personal reflection and the presentation of Sarah Green’s poem “Panama,” Smith explores the bittersweet perspectives that come after love ends, emphasizing not only the sorrow but also the transformative beauty and lessons left behind.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

Processing the End of a Relationship

• Maggie Smith opens with a reflection on the common experience of questioning and re-examining relationships after they end.
• She describes a phase of “distinct disenchantment,” when the “spell of the relationship has broken and the magic’s gone.” (01:07)
  • Insight: This phase invites introspection—parsing what was real from what was illusion and learning to separate the story’s end from its entirety.
  • Personal connection: “I’ve been there. Most of us have been there more than once.” (01:40)

Acceptance and Gratitude

• The journey from heartbreak to acceptance is described as long and complex, sometimes requiring “a lot of time and a lot of work and maybe some therapy.” (01:53)
• She discusses the challenge—and importance—of feeling gratitude for what the relationship provided rather than focusing solely on its demise.

Citing Jack Gilbert: Celebrating the “Flying”

• Smith references Jack Gilbert’s poem “Famous Failing and Flying” and the line: “Everyone forgets that Icarus also flew.” (02:13)
  • Memorable Quote: “Even when a relationship ends before we’re ready, even when it hurts, I think there’s something to celebrate in it. Maybe lots of things to celebrate. One of those things we can celebrate is the flying that occurred before we fell.” (02:18)

Introduction to Today’s Poem

• Smith sets up Sarah Green’s “Panama” as a poem that captures “the balance of sadness, wry humor, and gratitude despite it all” after a breakup.
  • She encourages listeners to find gratitude and celebrate the beautiful and real moments from past relationships—no matter how they ended.

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Featured Poem: “Panama” by Sarah Green

(Read by Maggie Smith at 03:07)

Key Themes in the Poem:

• Appreciation for specific, intimate gestures and memories (e.g., carrying the air conditioner, sharing a moment in afternoon light).
• The mix of hope and disappointment (the proposal conversation, aborted plans to see art at the Met).
• Playful remembrance (getting pregnant “so many times in dreams”).
• The contrasts between intention and outcome, certainty and loss (observing the steelhead in the creek as a metaphor for something trying and failing to hide).
• The beauty in shared mundane moments—a memory at the farmer’s market, a blue knit hat, the simplicity of standing by a creek.

Notable Excerpt from the Poem:

“There was a time when we were certain of our love we stood looking over Canada Way Creek and it wasn’t a shadow,
that steel head twisting in the water trying but failing to disguise itself against the shale.” (03:48)

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• Smith on reflection:
  • “You might ask yourself, was the time I spent with that person real? Was any of that real? Or at least some of it?” (01:19)
• On gratitude:
  • “It can take even longer to get to a place of gratitude, to be able to parse how or why it ended from what it was, to be able to separate the end of the story from the story as a whole, to be grateful for what the relationship gave you and taught you.” (01:53)
• On celebrating the good:
  • “Maybe it will inspire you to think about what you’re thankful for in a past relationship—something you learned about yourself or an experience you had that was particularly joyful and transformative, maybe even though it ended.” (02:36)

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Important Segments with Timestamps

• Maggie Smith’s opening reflection on breakups: 01:07 – 02:10
• Jack Gilbert’s “Icarus” reference and celebration of ‘the flying’: 02:13 – 02:23
• Introduction to the poem’s themes and invitation for gratitude: 02:24 – 02:53
• Reading of “Panama” by Sarah Green: 03:07 – 04:13

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Episode Tone

Gentle, reflective, and encouraging, Maggie Smith approaches the topic of relationship endings with sensitivity and hope, urging listeners to hold onto gratitude and the “real” beauty in what was, even as they move forward.

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Summary Takeaway

This episode invites listeners to remember the airborne moments in relationships—the joys and certainties—amidst the pain of an ending. Through Sarah Green’s tender poem and Maggie Smith’s warm reflections, we’re reminded that love may fail, but it was still real, and those flights are always worth celebrating.

Transcript

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I'm Maggie Smith, and this is the Slowdown. There's a time after a relationship ends when you probably catch yourself thinking what happened? You might find yourself retracing your steps, trying to figure out where you got lost along the way. You might ask yourself, was the time I spent with that person real? Was any of that real? Or at least some of it? There's a distinct disenchantment when the spell of the relationship has broken and the magic's gone. You're not seeing the world through love's rosy lens anymore. You wonder about what you might have overlooked or misinterpreted or just got wrong. I mean, I've been there. Most of us have been there more than once. It can take a lot of time and a lot of work and maybe some therapy to get to a place of acceptance, let alone contentment. After an important relationship ends. It can take even longer to get to a place of gratitude, to be able to parse how or why it ended from what it was, to be able to separate the end of the story from the story as a whole, to be grateful for what the relationship gave you and taught you. It makes me think of the opening line of the Jack Gilbert poem Famous Failing and Flying. Everyone forgets that Icarus also flew. Even when a relationship ends before we're ready, even when it hurts, I think there's something to celebrate in it. Maybe lots of things to celebrate. One of those things we can celebrate is the flying that occurred before we fell. Today's poem captures that blend of feelings after a relationship ends. The balance of sadness, wry humor, and gratitude despite it all is incredibly moving. Maybe it will inspire you to think about what you're thankful for in a past relationship, something you learned about yourself or an experience you had that was particularly joyful and and transformative, maybe even though it ended. There are beautiful things, real things, to hold onto from that time. Panama by Sarah Greene thanks for carrying the air conditioner and thanks for taking off my dress. Thanks for the afternoon light on your chest when you said I don't think what we want is that different. The week before you proposed you said I'm a man with a plan and all I could think of was Panama. Thanks for getting me pregnant so many times in dreams. Thanks for considering waiting in line at the Met for Michelangelo's Drawings. It was raining that day. Somebody said maybe you, maybe the New York Times that the crowd was so big and the pictures so small it was hard to get a good look so we left without trying. We went to the farmer's market and you bought a blue knit hat. Do you remember? There was a time when we were certain of our love we stood looking over Canada Way Creek and it wasn't a shadow, that steel head twisting in the water trying but failing to disguise itself against the shale. The Slowdown is a production of American Public Media in partnership with the Poetry Foundation. To get a poem delivered to you daily, go to slowdownshow.org and sign up for our newsletter and find us on Instagram slowdownshow and bluesky.downdownshow.org the slowdown is written by me, Maggie Smith. Our lead producer is Micah Kielbon and our associate producer is Maria Wurtel. Our music is composed by Kyle Andrews, engineering by Derek Ramirez. Our editor is Joanne Griffith. Additional production help by Susanna Sharpless, Cece Lucas, Marcel Malikibu, and Lauren Humpert. Our executives in charge are Chandra Cavati and Mark Crowley. Hi, it's Maggie. The Slowdown helps you discover new poems and revisit old favorites. You can help us continue showcasing poetry from a diverse swath of authors by making a tax deductible gift. Head to slowdownshow.org donate today.